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What is your weird, annoying habit?
When I talk online I say alot "yeah thats what they all say till they get pregnant" idk I like to tease people and it is funnier in German Edit: forgot to add that I say when it DOESN'T really make sense for example in a (playfull) argument it just comes out of habit
What movies/shows have the best morals that they teach throughout the plot?
The Simpsons made me the man I am today... ... hopefully that's a good thing.
What is the worst movie trilogy of all time?
Star Wars sequels
What do you guys do on your free time when you feel like doing nothing at all?
Nothing
question: what is your dream project that you want to complete?
Gathering enough money to buy my dad a ps5. I personally don't really care for consoles anymore but owning a ps5 is like my dad's dream and I really want to do something nice for him since he has done so much for me and I feel like I haven't been the best son to him
Professionals of your trade, what internet trend do you despise?
Any yahoo with an 800$ camera claiming they can shoot a wedding for dirt cheap and dragging down the whole marketplace.
What do you do to hush the inner voices that doubt every decision you've ever made?
I used to let it get to me bad, but now I have the fuck it attitude and I feel better for it
Which continent do you think is the best, and why?
Europe, they have an amazing history and so does Asia.
What is the oldest video game cheat code you can remember?
Up up down down left right left right B A Start
Which animal, if they decided to overthrow mankind, would be the most unstoppable?
Emus. They already won 2 wars against humans, they can take 12 9mm bullets to the chest, outrun usain bolt, and have kicks that can break skulls. If a car ran into one, the car would be totalled, and the emu would be okay. Plus they eat any vegetation, and can last a month without water, so it would be a struggle to deplete their food/water source.
If you were given the opportunity to relive one day of your life what would it be?
My first day in NYC
When did you know your s/o was falling out of love with you?
They become distant
How do you become a businessman?
Charge for sex
What kind of person do you want to become?
Slutty
What is your phone wallpaper?
Lock screen : Pink Floyd's album Animals Home screen : Judas Priest's album British Steel
What book should everyone read and why?
Sapiens by Noah Harari. It will revolutionise how you see the world.
Car owners with leather seats, what’s the best way to deal with summer weather?
Buy a car with air conditioned seats
How did you learn about money and personal finance if it's not taught in School?
Trial and error. And common sense
What's the most questionable Porn you have ever watched?
An erotic story where a girl is kidnapped, encased in a concrete block and kept alive for years with tubes coming in and out of her. As in, I actually want to "be" her (as a guy)
What’s the hardest job in the world?
Being conscious and awake in an OCEAN full of zombie sheep that are in a walking coma. The highest suicide rate is Air Traffic Control. So there is that. I would say Marine Corps Infantry would have to be up there. If you never served you will NEVER understand though.
What is a device/product that used to be produced that you miss now?
I miss the old iPod nano with all the pretty colours.
How do you wipe?
Front to back
How long do you think you would survive in a zombie apocalypse?
depends on how where I was, and how realistic the zombie outbreak was. I would say maybe a day
What's the closest you've ever come to dying?
Several car accidents, almost lost consciousness under water and got my hair pulled into an assembly machine at work
What was the most embarrassing moment of you life?
My continuous breathing.
If you could have any super power, what would it be?
I’d be fluent in every single language ever created
What product is more expensive than you think it should be?
Housing. I know it's not too cheap to build a house at an attractive location, but my goodness, you pay €400k for a rowhouse in a sterile Dutch car-oriented suburb?
What is one thing you regret the most?
Not able to speak out when it matters the most
What makes north americans believe north americans (usa,canada,mexico) are not fat but europeans and asians are just too skinny?
When everyone is fat, being fat becomes the new normal and being normal becomes being skinny
When will treasury bonds beat inflation?
COME ON MAN
What is the best way to wipe and keep it sparkling clean with minimum tissues as possible?
Bidet
What were your dream jobs as child that as you got older you never even thought of pursuing?
SPACE MAN
What is your crazy Father-in-law story?
Not father in law, but when my boyfriend and I were 15 and I was meeting his father he hit on me. We're still together and everything but I haven't seen him since thank god
What’s the most boujee thing you could write on a postcard while you’re traveling?
Why would anyone want to emulate the bourgeoisie?
What's the best VR headset for porn?
A girlfriend
Which is the most overused question on this sub?
Any question that has "your username" in it.
What are some signs some one doesn’t love you anymore?
They keep putting the toaster on the edge of the tub while you are taking a bath.
What’s the strangest, most unexplainable occurrence you’ve ever had in your life?
My life is one big strange most unexplainable occurrence in itself
What are some of the professions with an inflated sense of self importance?
Influencer ..(if you can call it a profession)
What was the big event or drama at your school?
Mid-80s. It was widely thought a girl a couple years ahead of me had been having a covert affair with the grade 11 and 12 French teacher. When I got to grade 12, he left his wife and moved in with the girl, confirming all the rumours. I had him for home room and French that year. So did his daughter. So did the girl's younger sister. There were some awkward moments.
You wake up with a large bubble the size of a watermelon that’s hanging and swanging from your penis. You go to the doctor and discover that there is a healthy trippple sexed fetus growing inside. The doctor takes out a heroin needle and burst the bubble sending you straight into labor, what’s next?
I think "why did op have the urge to make such a question?"
What did a neighbor do to make you think that person was insane?
Stormed outside with a hammer and started threatening some bloke who parked outside his house.
You’re lucky enough to be married to very talented and very attractive Melissa Villaseñor, one night you are right in the middle of doing the deed going full steam and she breaks out into her Owen Wilson voice, what do you do ?
Keep going
What is the worst time you asked for Help?
While taking a shit
What is the most outrageous thing you've had to deal with at a hospital?
The bill.
Everyone now calls you irl by your irl username, how fucked are you?
It's gonna get tiresome to hear 'underscore' all the time but otherwise fine.
If you could go back in time to any point in your life, what is one thing you would do differently?
14, take school more serious. I ended up dropping out and having to pay to go back. Could’ve just done it right the first time and been that many more years ahead. Set a focus on what I wanted to do and done it. A lot harder when you’re older and have responsibilities.
If you froze time for 1 hour, what would you do to make the most of your time?
Freeze time again within that hour and reset the timer so time remains frozen forever.
What youtube channel do you watch to relax?
GeoWizard or Bushcraft Survival Australia.
What is something your parents told you that you will never forget?
“You are a psychopath.” ”You’re fat.” ”You’re going to be the reason we go to hell.” ”Gay people go to hell.” ”Atheists go to hell.” ”You’re dumb.” And of course, the classical and indirect, “You’re part of the reason my life is miserable. I had to sacrifice everything for you! So why can’t you just do as I say?”
What movie do you just have to watch again ?
I have watched ratatouille atleast 17 times in my life.
How did racial stereotypes become a thing?
I'm pretty sure part of it was the Church trying to justify the enslavement of African people
What rule are you a glaring exception to?
I'm a Democrat with guns.
ER workers: What’s the funniest story someone has told you to explain why something was stuck in their butt?
Never explicitly asked but whenever an explination was offered, most of the time it was "Oh I slipped and fell" Yeah Chad, you slipped and just so happened to perfectly line up your butthole and lodged a mini Statue of Liberty up your ass. Happens all the time.
What is a normal life like between the ages of 11-16?
What is this sticky stuff?
What's a good job for a socially anxious fellow?
Night shift
You're a shape-shifter now but can only turn into one animal. What animal would you choose and what would you do with the power?
Cat. Nap in the sun.
Have you ever told someone that you did or didn't like them romantically/sexually even though the opposite was true? If so, why did you feel the need to do it?
I didn't think I was good enough for him. So I told him I didn't like him like that. He was at university, had an amazing future ahead of him, and I felt like I'd only hold him back.
Who is the most attractive celebrity (male or female) today?
Danny Devito
You know everything about a certain subject. But the first reply chooses the down side of it. What is it and why?
Potato peeling
People who use dark mode, why?
Easier on the eyes, no matter where
What technological advancement do you most hope to come see true before you die?
A device that records my dreams so I can watch them again.
what is the best dumb but awesome movie?
Dumb and Dumber obviously
You are in an action movie and about to off somebody: what would your one-liner be?
“Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell”
What's the worst "for plot convenience" you've seen?
Rise of Skywalker dagger
What would be the worst “buy one get one free” sale of all time?
Ladder
Which product made you so angry that you swore to yourself you’ll never buy the brand again?
Doc Martens
What are your ideas about New York? What are your preconceptions if you've never been?
All I know is that I lived in NY state for 28 years, moved to SC, and now realize that NY wasn't so bad after all. SC is awful.
What's the WORST interaction you've had with a Significant Other's parents?
My fiancé’s parents are Jehovah’s Witnesses who have shunned him for not believing their religion and called me the “woman he lived with” and told him to go back to his “wife”. We met after his divorce, but they don’t see that as real because it wasn’t on a “scriptural basis”. Safe to say they’re no longer in our lives.
What kind of cookie are you?
A tough cookie
What's something that is heavily anticipated, but never lives up to the excitement?
Every single thing.
What would be normal if paid for, but sketchy if free?
Drugs usually
When did you realize your coworkers weren’t your friends?
The same day I get hired at any job. We're all there just to make money, if we get along, it just makes the job easier. It doesn't make us friends.
What is your favorite adult joke from a kids show?
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lY2kC5fZG64](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lY2kC5fZG64)
Vampires exist, they actively select their prey based on the blood group due to the varying flavours. What flavour would yours be?
Whatever stress tastes like
What are some of the best slang terms used from where you live?
In my country, we sometimes refer to a woman's vagina as "pussy"
What’s your favorite food?
Mashed potatoes with gravy and pork chops.
Things happen and you now own the company that is currently employing you. Would you hire someone like yourself? Why?
Absolutely and I would pay someone like myself way more. I go above and beyond way too often and underpaid per market standards.
What are some phrases that, while totally innocent, come off as incredibly creepy?
I like to watch you sleep is creepy AF
You're at the top of the roller coaster! What do you shout?
I fail to understand the gravity of the situation.
What is your biggest fear?
Bugs crawling up my cooch when I take my glasses off in the shower
What are some funny off-brand names for things?
Aldi Mars bars are called Titans.
What are your must listen to metal albums?
Demanufacture by Fear Factory
What animal species wins the award for shittiest mom?
humans
What’s your best lazy cooking maneuver?
I FaceTimed stuff on the stove top to make sure it didn’t boil over… so I could continue playing a game.
What is a fact about yourself that you would never reveal on a first date?
How much money I have.
Why did you and your SO break up?
She wanted other guys, I didn't.
What outlet have people used in the past to learn guitar as a beginner?
If you're going the self taught route them pick up a chord book, pick up a scale book, learn those over and over and over. When the boredom starts to set in, pick your favorite classic "staple" i.e. Smoke On the Water, and start learning that. Alternate between chords and scales and learning your favorite songs from tabs. This is how I taught myself how to play back in 2006.
What is your favorite evolution pre-Homo sapien and why?
*Homo erectus*, because obviously.
What does home smell like to you?
My farts
What words suddenly and uncontrollably force you into bouts of the word's associated song?
'When September Ends' can actually occur naturally in speech and thusly results in an ear-worm.
If you were to timetravel back to the middle ages, what would be the best one thing to bring, to live a long live there?
Medicine
[Serious] Was retirement what you thought it would be?
My grandma says it is amazing
What's the worst thing you did while horny?
The worst thing i do when horny is wank to porn. firstly it reminds me of what i wont get literally anytime soon. so it makes me feel even more lonely and hurt, its like cucking myself and i hate that
What minor vehicle repair have you been putting off?
My bycicle is rlly dirty ngl, i should probably wash it, thanks for reminding me!
In a no-holds-barred fist fight, who do you think could potentially take down a prime MIKE TYSON?
Prime Tyson? Idk man he was an animal.
The ancient Egyptian gods return and choose you and your sister as new emperors. Now you'll need to marry her and produce some proper offspring - just like tradition demands it. What do you name your first born, and why?
Tutinbred: The name speaks for itself
Should Czech republic, Poland, Slovakia and Slovenia adopt the Cyrillic script? Why or why not?
Lol why would we? There is literally no upside to that, only downsides. There is no reason to switch to that weird script used only in handful countries, opposed to latin alphabet used in majority of developed world
Dear Judges/Lawyers What is the craziest case?
R v Dudley & Stephens: Three guys stuck on a boat at sea after a shipwreck. After a week, two kill the third one and cannibalised his body. Found by search and rescue the next day. Prosecuted for murder. Defence of necessity failed.
Non-Americans, what’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear “America?”
Gun violence