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You’re legally allowed to steal one item in the entire world, what would it be and why?
Jeff Bezos' bank account. Because Jeff Bezos' bank account.
What's legal in your country that should be made illegal?
voting without ID in some states
Do you think there is a causal correlation between temp and country success? Why or why not?
It doesn’t limit “success” in general but it does limit the industries in which a country can be successful
What is something you wouldn’t want to hear while being operated on?
Literally anything, I should be passed out
What secret do you know about someone you hate but have never revealed?
Upvoted you mate
Which celebrity has the most famous sounding name?
Sadly, Kardashian. It just has that weird flair to it.
what's your million dollar idea for a product or service?
Nice try, Thomas Edison. Think up your own breakthroughs.
In Your Version of Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer, What's Happening At The Island of Misfit Toys?
You ever see the ending of Sausage Party?
Police officers/security guards, what is the weirdest place you've caught a couple having sex in?
Not a cop but have worked in zoos and yes there are people with animal kinks that come to look at the animals then sneak off for sex. Yes you will get caught. Yes you will be a sex offender
What are some of the cleverest and downright vicious political maneuvers in history and modern politics?
Donald Trump discovering that you can just ignore subpoenas and court orders, decline interviews and lie as the President and there's literally no consequences.
What do you think makes the colour pink?
Red and white paint
Personal question, how has your sex drive changed with age?
Quality over quantity
What is a regular ritual you have that you can't really explain?
Every time I sneeze I pat myself on the chest two times
What are some dark secrets of your country?
Canada's treatment of their Indigenous population. A lot of that darkness has been brought to light.
What is the most expensive mistake you ever made?
Breaking the law
What thing from a movie trailer/advertising immediately turns you off going to see the movie?
Any appearance of Adam Sandler.
Musicians, what's your biggest pet peeve in music?
People pretending they are the authority on what's good and what isn't. Let people enjoy what they like. Also, the dude who goes to the music store and plays one of 10 different metal solos for 15 minutes on high volume before leaving the store with a pack of guitar picks and nothing else.
What is something people either find very pleasant or painful?
Death. Any way it is in context could be could be good or bad.
What secret talent do you possess that no one knows about?
I see this once a week I swear
If you could any course to school curriculums what would it be?
forgetting words in titles 101
You’re on death row. What’s your last meal?
the wardens wife
people who dog ear pages why?
Because I don't intend to sell or share my books. And even if I did a slight crease in the corner of the page doesn't make it harder to read.
What are the weirdest and/or worst song number scenes from a musical?
Upvoted you mate
What is the scariest thing that you have seen that you weren’t supposed to?
My grandad's dick
What are the signs of a workoholic?
When work is always on the mind. During meals or when trying to go to bed you are checking emails and discussing what to do tomorrow at work. It's just neverending.
[Serious] At what age should a dad stop taking his daughter into the men’s room?
Context: I took my 7yo daughter into the men’s room and some crazy lady started screaming at me about how awful I was. Obviously she was crazy but it got me thinking: what’s the cut off age? I never even thought to stop helping her in the bathroom… she’s still terrified of auto-flush toilets and hand dryers!
What embarrasing knowledge gaps do you have?
8,000 Facebook users die every days on the Website.
What was the breaking point with a family member or friend that finally made you cut contact with them?
Identity theft, and racist/generally bigoted behavior.
What's an otherwise mildly annoying thing that infuriates you?
People who don’t have manners
Before being a sperm, what is our existence?
space dust
what would you do if Joe Biden walked in your room and threatened to beat your ass?
Turn the fan on and watch a light breeze take him out
Who’s your favorite artist?
Thefatrat
What are some "universal truths" that everyone should know?
there is ultimately no right or wrong no good or evil and nothing we do at this point in our existence will have any sort lasting galactic influence
If you got to speak at your worst enemy's funeral, what would you say?
I'd politely decline. Their death wouldn't be about me, and other people's grief doesn't need to be taken up with empty platitudes or petty revenge.
When did you realize you were talking to an insane person?
When I realized I was alone in the room
What's a current pop-culture trend that will be cringe in the next decade?
The pointing at your arm and saying sheeeeeesh
What's an example of " ____ is just ____ with extra steps" ?
The third floor is just the second floor with extra steps.
What celebrity are you told you look like the most?
One of the Asian ones.
What's the saddest and most touching song you've heard?
closer - nine inch nails
What is the creepiest/shadiest thing that's happened in your hometown?
Not so much creepy, but still weird. There was this old lady who lived next to a CVS and her cats took over her house when she died. There are multiple cats that live in the area now.
Why can’t rock songs be sung in a foreign language?
They do, just you didnt find them tho
Which "Rights" do people have in your country that should be removed in order to enhance National Security?
those who give up liberty for security deserve neither
You spontaneously grow wings, what now?
Go on to an anti vac Facebook page and post a pic saying the covid jab did this to me, sit back and enjoy a beer
Finally received a Pfizer shot letter invitation in Japan. Not anti vaxx whatsoever but this time a little skeptical. Am 80% convinced. Have been seeking confirmation for a while. Go for it? Arguments?
Approximately 100% of the people dying in COVID wards right now are unvaccinated. The vaccines *work*, and they're very safe. We're long past the point where skepticism is warranted. It's your moral duty to get vaccinated ASAP.
You get 1 trillion dollars to end global warming. How do you do it?
Invent better carbon capture and ozone restoration
We all know what a pharmacy sells, but what would a farmacy sell?
Oinkments
What is the perfect salad?
chicken fingers
What’s something about yourself that seems like a lie but ain’t?
Most of me screams «secure and straight», nah bro, always bi and insecure.
Those who were public school teachers, why did you leave the profession and how are things going for you now?
The pay was so awful, even with a college degree. I made almost as much money being an assistant manager at a game store in the mall as I did teaching. The college debt was too much and needed to get that paid off, pay for a car, and move out of my parent's house. I miss the students and I miss teaching, but I do not miss the school system, dealing with state regulations, and horrible parents. I left that career 20 years ago and am much happier now.
What is the most expensive part about being poor?
Constantly replacing cheaper items because you can't afford to splurge on a one-time-buy expensive model
What does romance means to you?
cuddles, infinite cuddles
What would happen to an airplane if it kept accelerating upwards into the sky?
it would eventually stall and fall back down
Everyone complains about current generations, but what was wrong with your generation?
We are all depressed AF because we were young and nieve enough to think that if you worked hard an applied yourself that things would generally work out your way and we are entirely way to nostalgic
People who chose their name … why didn’t you choose a better one?
I chose my middle name because it is an old and respectable female name with a lot of interesting history and variations, and because for some stupid reason my parents didn't give me a middle name. My last name is my married name because my birth surname was awful, people always struggled to pronounce or spell it despite it being fairly phonetic. In other words, my husband's surname was better than mine, so I took his. If I had been fond of my surname, I would not have changed it.
What are some of the worst band/artist names of all time?
Marky mark and the funky bunch
What is the weirdest but wholesome Youtube video you have stumbled upon?
Chimps on ice https://youtu.be/pOj_QoSH6is thank me later
What is one of your most precious memories?
Answering this question
What is the best kind of cheese?
Dick cheese mmm 😋
What's the most akward situation where you have called someone the wrong name?
I never faced one but i have a solution for this case You: Sorry what's your name?? The person: oh my name is ___ that's kinda rude haha.... You: oh no, not your first name i know that, i was asking about your surname. There, done :D
How come Brazilians pronounce “that” like “thaaaaaad”?
How come you used how come instead of why do
What is something you do that no else does?
Smell my own shit
Which game has the best music?
Minecraft
What’s the best pie filling?
Blueberries
How did you ruin a perfectly fine relationship?
i told them the truth when they asked my opinion on something.
What are the pro's and con's of having an attached vs detached garage?
I see nothing positive to detached
What's overrated in this day and age?
Picnics, never enjoyed one.
How have you dealt with the isolation during Covid?
Luckily enough i could do exercise outdoors, a lot of walking, running, biking, gym, etc. That helped me keep sanity...
What demonstration of strength of character is often overlooked?
Listening
What’s something you wish more people knew about you?
That maybe I do not have a home or nice clothes or good shoes but I can work like all the other people. It is not fair when they pick the people that look better or have homes and makes it very hard to have those things if you never can work to pay things.
You have been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and only have thirty minutes to live. What do you do?
Take 10 shots of tequila - dance and sing to my favorite music, make love to my gf and die in her arms.
If you could like in any fictional place (video game, book, movie, etc.) where would you live and why?
I’d settle in black marsh
Taxes didn’t exist before 1913, why do you think governments are so keen on taxing their citizens in 2021?
Taxes existed long before 1913.
What’s the best historical example of “If it’s stupid but it works, it’s not stupid”?
The Jester of Ludwig XII slapped the ass of the king in a joke. The king asked him why he have done that. He answered: "I am sorry, my majesty. I mistook you for the queen." Well he was sentenced to death. But the jester were so loyal that the king alowed him to choose his way to die. The jester said he want's to die from old age. The king laughed and found it so funny, that he granted his wish.
What was the greatest prank that had been played on you?
Birth.
There’s those memes that always say “Would you slap your best friend for $1 million??” But who’s someone you WOULDN’T slap?
Mike Tyson
People in England not wearing masks in shops. Why not?
They are vaccinated, they already got covid, they are 20? Why you give a shit is the real question.
Those who live in apartments, what is the worst thing a neighbour has done in the block?
Murder.
What would you do if you were sent over to fight abroad in the military? You are special because you're invincible to any form of weapon, no bomb can scratch you. However, you are too merciful to kill anyone but you still want to support your country to your best ability. What would you do?
Be a combat medic. You can just walk through the hot zones and pull the injured out
Has anyone had a dream about a video game and if so, what was the experience like?
I’ve had dreams where I was viewing and controlling someone in third person like it was a game. Also for a while I was really into Tetris and my mind would play it as I would fall asleep.
What's something you regret saying or doing when you got too angry?
I have a drawer full of broken controllers.....
2022 is in 5 months. What have you done or will do to improve the quality of your life? [serious]
Leaving my job who treat me like crap
what would you do if you found Xi Jingping laying on your bed while telling you to "take off your clothes or else he''d lower your social credit score down to zero"?
Kick his cunt in. His security isn’t about and I don’t live in China
What is something you do just because you think it’s funny?
I'll pretend I hear people incorrectly to make them uncomfortable. Like the other day my mom asked, "Do you want some peanut sauce?" And I replied, "Did you say PENIS sauce?"
What was your go to homemade snack when you were a child/teen?
Sand
What was a time you thought you weren't going to ever get through something, but ended up getting through it, stronger and happier than ever?
About a month and a half ago I got dumped from a pretty serious relationship. Granted it doesn't sound that bad, but I didn't have much else to live for aside from her. 3 weeks later and I was looking into buying a gun to end my life. Needless to say, some stuff happened in between then and now and the past 2 and a half weeks I've been working towards becoming a better person than I was at the end of that relationship. Mainly in terms of my physical appearance, but also bettering myself mentally too. No one knows to this day how close to the edge I was. In fact the only reason I'm alive still is because coincidentally the day I was going to buy the gun, it had been recalled and so a replacement needed to be ordered before I could buy it. And I never got a call back from the gun store about it for whatever reason. The person who saved me and talked me out of it wasn't even aware that he was essentially saving my live. But I'm feeling pretty good now and now realize that I'll be okay and if anything I'll be better than I was before so long as I reach my fitness goals.
What Are The Main Differences Between Social Darwinism And Rasicm?
They're wholly different things.
What comes to your mind when you think about The Queen of England?
immortality
Why did you leave your keys on the table?
I wanted to.
What outdated video game from the 80s do you think should be revamped for new technology?
Galaga. Loved that game but nowadays I can't find anything like it.
whats a random fact you know?
You're a cutie.
What is something that is super sexual but you find un atractive/hot?
Don't tell me you read your question and thought it makes sense.
What's an example of 10 seconds feeling like an eternity?
cardio on the stair climber 😭
If you lived forever, what job/occupation would you want to have?
Historian
What simple thing makes you immensely happy?
Silence.
If you could add any course to school curriculums, what would it be?
Basic personal finance
Who would you choose to narrate your biography?
Gilbert Gottfried
How does one get back at a rude fast food manager for revenge?
One walks away and forgets the whole thing and enjoys ones life.
What was your closest call to death?
nearly getting rammed by a truck at my grocery store 👌
[Serious] People who've attempted suicide, at what point, if any, did you start to regret your decision?
I never did. I just realized that there are people that relied on me. I know it's not healthy, but that's where I am.
What company has the best frozen pizza?
American moment