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6,000 | 6,001 | What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out? Oven mitts. | [-3.78602296e-02 9.53264534e-02 8.42339694e-02 3.33018973e-02
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6,001 | 6,002 | holy crap a guy actually gave me his number and i didn't know what to do so i panicked and sent him a picture of a dead bird? | [ 5.37527204e-02 3.55588794e-02 -1.45976115e-02 -3.00655365e-02
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6,002 | 6,003 | They say Margaret is a raving beauty. You mean she's escaped from the funny farm? | [ 4.72053178e-02 -6.30324483e-02 1.02780975e-01 5.83400875e-02
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6,003 | 6,004 | why do they always say "fight fire with fire" in the movies and stuff? basic pokemon training renders that pretty ineffective | [-2.42768265e-02 4.56221290e-02 2.36525610e-02 4.24057581e-02
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6,004 | 6,005 | I went to the Zoo the other day, but all it had was one dog. It was a shitzu. | [ 5.13842069e-02 1.85318347e-02 8.44599232e-02 9.48931128e-02
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6,005 | 6,006 | Isn't everyone gettin over racist jokes? Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal | [-3.60806286e-02 1.13919738e-03 -2.42441390e-02 6.28705844e-02
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6,006 | 6,007 | Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? A: Breasts don't have eyes. | [ 3.97964977e-02 -6.66463450e-02 1.90906413e-02 5.89740537e-02
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6,007 | 6,008 | I was playing the Witcher 3 and I realized It should be called the Bitcher, cause I slay more pussy than monsters. ( ) | [-2.75709182e-02 -8.81065950e-02 -4.84887064e-02 4.34001312e-02
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6,008 | 6,009 | Art Teacher: your drawings are due tomorrow me: [hours later] maybe add in some grapes police sketch artist: ..a bowl of fruit attacked you? | [-9.45833698e-03 9.57358629e-02 3.82353477e-02 1.23652285e-02
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6,009 | 6,010 | (Waiter) "What can I get you sir?" (Gastronomist) "Something with a simpler plot." | [-9.09000784e-02 6.74221888e-02 -3.46403234e-02 -1.16747124e-02
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6,010 | 6,011 | A heads up to girls on Facebook .. if your status says "single" and your profile picture is you with your cat - Well then no fucking shit | [ 1.83334742e-02 -8.68905932e-02 3.90304141e-02 3.94974835e-02
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6,011 | 6,012 | Why is Hillary Clinton just like a man? Because she won't pull out until she's done. | [ 5.04912883e-02 -6.62787333e-02 8.84176698e-03 5.22660911e-02
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6,012 | 6,013 | Someone came to my door today asking for donations to the local swimming pool So I gave them a glass of water | [-1.61571838e-02 1.06004529e-01 5.53004704e-02 -5.30454256e-02
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6,013 | 6,014 | According to movie trailers, 98% of white kids are possessed by the devil. | [ 5.66734113e-02 3.56396437e-02 -3.58240232e-02 6.20909669e-02
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6,014 | 6,015 | A racist, a womanizer, and a rapist walked into a bar... ...the bartender says "how may I help you, Mr. President?" | [-5.80704100e-02 2.49796771e-02 -1.81594919e-02 4.14204709e-02
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6,015 | 6,016 | A hearse passed me on the highway going over 100 mph... Some body was in a rush. | [-1.50085595e-02 5.50096557e-02 4.79236469e-02 2.48392932e-02
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6,016 | 6,017 | One great thing about a cartoon avi is that I could be anything. I could be a 90-yo man. I could be a baby. HOW DO YOU KNOW I'M NOT A BABY! | [-1.76707674e-02 2.08217762e-02 -3.73830609e-02 1.79542042e-02
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6,017 | 6,018 | That awkward moment when ur mom doesn't know the words to a song so she screams "HAIL SATAN" & explodes | [ 2.62974855e-03 1.23765152e-02 1.75432842e-02 -2.64912099e-03
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6,018 | 6,019 | Why can't they teach drivers ed on the same day as sex ed in Egypt? Wears out the camel. | [ 1.82648432e-02 1.10228695e-01 3.94141488e-02 5.30142486e-02
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6,019 | 6,020 | How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? THE LIGHTBULB IS FINE. THERE IS NO PROBLEM WITH IT. I MADE LIGHTBULBS WITH GOOD MANAGEMENT. LET'S MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN. | [ 7.34117404e-02 -1.94001384e-02 7.52843246e-02 1.20677380e-02
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6,020 | 6,021 | Why did the console peasant cross the road ? To render buildings on the other side | [ 3.75203341e-02 7.26583302e-02 -1.06374752e-02 -1.30028906e-03
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6,021 | 6,022 | What is Tom Hanks' wireless password? 1forrest1 | [-1.55197710e-01 2.86669470e-02 -5.23266420e-02 -1.00338042e-01
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6,022 | 6,023 | What do you call a lizard with sex problems? Ereptile Dysfunction | [-1.94454659e-02 -4.90310229e-03 -2.43460294e-02 1.15745567e-01
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6,023 | 6,024 | Me: "There are so many exotic sounding flavours these days. I just can't resist-" Doctor: "YOU NEED TO STOP DRINKING SHAMPOO!" | [-5.40064462e-02 1.63513087e-02 8.52117464e-02 1.87518019e-02
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6,024 | 6,025 | Tip of the day: When there's a will...find a way to be in it! | [-4.62165102e-02 3.34019912e-03 -2.92763542e-02 -3.61185782e-02
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6,025 | 6,026 | What did the lightbulb say to its mother? I wuv you watts and watts. | [-9.54795163e-03 4.65413146e-02 -4.78791408e-02 1.15530856e-01
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6,026 | 6,027 | This girl I like said she didn't like bondage..... ....Me either, but you're the one who said No. | [-2.71069705e-02 2.78327963e-03 5.41809760e-02 -4.57036123e-02
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6,027 | 6,028 | You read for a part, you feel good about it, you feel confident, then they cast Ben Affleck. | [ 7.29935849e-03 -8.43702778e-02 3.52859236e-02 -1.22836819e-02
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6,028 | 6,029 | Why is F-time so much fun? Because F-time is Part-E time. | [ 4.57392596e-02 3.07599176e-02 6.96180463e-02 1.34194810e-02
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6,029 | 6,030 | Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight? BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE | [-1.84079614e-02 7.43075907e-02 -2.66605522e-02 5.79863749e-02
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6,030 | 6,031 | Honked & did thumbs-up to teen goth girl on the street I thought looked super cool & she rolled her eyes & I was like YES EXACTLY KEEP AT IT | [-6.32325606e-03 9.29875672e-03 1.02438994e-01 -2.43763812e-02
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6,031 | 6,032 | If this post on WebMD is correct, I died like ten years ago. | [-1.17146429e-02 -2.68638767e-02 -3.12168766e-02 7.46480748e-02
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6,032 | 6,033 | A man walks into a tailor to buy a tuxedo. He confidently tells the tailor he doesn't need any assistance. The tailor says... ... "Fine. Suit yourself." | [-5.96739389e-02 9.17805359e-02 -6.29282743e-03 1.15764933e-02
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6,033 | 6,034 | A kid came to my door earlier dressed like a mime, so I pretended to put candy in his basket. | [-4.46183532e-02 8.28477442e-02 4.48727049e-02 2.24584918e-02
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6,034 | 6,035 | My goal for 2017.... ....is to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013 | [-5.33607826e-02 1.11429878e-01 4.07752171e-02 -7.43140951e-02
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6,035 | 6,036 | [warning racist] wanna hear a dark joke? africas population | [ 9.70207434e-03 5.44073470e-02 -8.18783641e-02 1.11041203e-01
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6,036 | 6,037 | Cause the players gonna play play play The haters gonna hate hate hate Baby Im just gonna bottle it all up & develop severe trust issues | [-1.58553987e-04 -5.29172905e-02 3.98319438e-02 -3.00791804e-02
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6,037 | 6,038 | Who serves all you can eat rabbit stew? Warren Buffet! | [ 6.77080974e-02 -7.33600836e-03 -2.90462864e-03 -2.65927054e-03
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6,038 | 6,039 | I love this joke today Knock, knock. "Who's there?" 9/11 "9/11 who?" You said you would never forget! Sorry if this has been posted recently.. Could be too soon? | [-5.26877865e-02 -3.82371172e-02 3.10703018e-03 8.29078853e-02
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6,039 | 6,040 | My door to door VHS sales are taking a nose dive because of the economy. | [ 3.76729593e-02 -5.28419539e-02 2.00494379e-02 -7.99387246e-02
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6,040 | 6,041 | Now I ain't saying she's a gold digger But she did move to California in 1849... | [ 3.25335003e-02 -6.67922348e-02 5.94635233e-02 6.63833395e-02
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6,041 | 6,042 | I tried to go into a restaurant playing Pokemon go. I couldn't get in though. The servers were too busy. | [ 3.58570963e-02 -5.81431165e-02 4.35003527e-02 -7.27374014e-03
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6,042 | 6,043 | Husband: Have you lost weight? Me: About 10 lbs H: Who you trying to look good for? *wink M: You don't know him. He's on Twitter... | [-5.14265895e-02 8.23663697e-02 8.13274756e-02 1.11123338e-01
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6,043 | 6,044 | Two fish swim into a wall One looks at the other and says *"Dam!"* #oldbutgold | [-4.72190045e-02 6.86252862e-02 -9.80167091e-03 2.67241662e-03
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6,044 | 6,045 | What did the dyslexic bank robber say when he robbed the bank? "Air in the hands motherstickers! This is a fuck up!" | [-7.68077001e-02 2.20913831e-02 -3.57361361e-02 6.66838437e-02
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6,045 | 6,046 | Preventing childhood obesity... It's as easy as taking candy from a baby. | [-3.79016064e-02 1.19508684e-01 1.42685371e-02 6.17283620e-02
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6,046 | 6,047 | *bangs gavel* wife: who??? | [-9.03358907e-02 2.32277066e-02 7.59945288e-02 3.38050537e-02
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6,047 | 6,048 | What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck | [-8.06569383e-02 4.78244200e-02 1.65216103e-02 3.25940573e-03
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6,048 | 6,049 | New Year's is just a holiday created by calendar companies who don't want you reusing last year's calendar. | [-1.98312737e-02 -6.25436055e-03 5.69253340e-02 -1.26973661e-02
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6,049 | 6,050 | What do you call the Japanese demon of spices? The Pepper Oni. | [-1.30594164e-01 -4.53330437e-03 -8.73599648e-02 7.70875439e-02
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6,050 | 6,051 | I would post a Casey Anthony joke... But my mom would kill me. | [-2.57778969e-02 1.37259522e-02 1.92445535e-02 3.11488733e-02
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6,051 | 6,052 | What's the difference between Australia and Yogurt? Culture | [ 8.06973726e-02 1.17625818e-02 -1.28492294e-02 -1.40378177e-02
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6,052 | 6,053 | I think some drugs should be legalized... but cocaine is where I draw the line. | [ 1.47708431e-02 -3.79178859e-02 -3.16218697e-02 -1.15932450e-01
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6,053 | 6,054 | Why was the horse farmer arrested? He was raising a colt. | [-7.01922998e-02 8.07015970e-02 3.23093683e-02 5.98258972e-02
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6,054 | 6,055 | What's pink and wrinked and hangs out my Y-fronts? My mum. | [ 2.36165375e-02 -2.18112003e-02 6.04087338e-02 6.77088127e-02
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6,055 | 6,056 | What's gray squeaky and hangs around in caves ? Stalagmice ! | [ 4.65324931e-02 3.64801995e-02 3.51575166e-02 1.67762991e-02
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6,056 | 6,057 | Everyone's gynecologist uses the term battle damage,' right? | [-7.69440597e-03 4.11679000e-02 3.15576536e-03 6.55346587e-02
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6,057 | 6,058 | A terrorist posts on reddit. His post blows up. He meets 72 virgins. His day could not be better. | [ 1.05229141e-02 5.79115115e-02 -3.99729796e-02 2.41259262e-02
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6,058 | 6,059 | NSFW) Name your James Bond Porno...Go! From Russia With Glove:No Glove = No Love | [-3.57416049e-02 2.65702028e-02 -3.14843431e-02 -2.13977434e-02
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6,059 | 6,060 | Mexican and Black Jokes are ALL the same... Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal. | [-4.26626988e-02 1.04006547e-02 -5.95980026e-02 8.60048980e-02
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6,060 | 6,061 | Have you heard about the masochist who likes taking a cold shower every morning? So he has a hot one instead. | [-5.47741773e-03 2.08050795e-02 7.08522350e-02 8.39697793e-02
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6,061 | 6,062 | Have you seen 'Wears My Penis? Ooops, typo. Have you seen where my pen is? | [-3.40116397e-02 1.97738409e-02 7.60927051e-02 9.88759007e-03
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6,062 | 6,063 | How does one turn a fox into a pig?.. ...Marry her. | [ 4.49196771e-02 1.23904198e-02 2.15988718e-02 2.60887593e-02
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6,063 | 6,064 | Dad I spotted a Dalmatian! No need to it already has its own spots! | [-6.17878791e-03 -1.25654479e-02 4.76050824e-02 -1.90335624e-02
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6,064 | 6,065 | *wakes up at the crack of Dawn* *instantly regrets drunk dialing Dawn last night* | [ 3.16968281e-03 4.25330289e-02 5.90067431e-02 2.34341882e-02
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6,065 | 6,066 | Knock Knock Who's there ! Brother ! Brother who ? Brother-ation I've forgotten your name ! | [-8.64142701e-02 4.60161939e-02 -1.15467105e-02 1.28599284e-02
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6,066 | 6,067 | Your chances in Vegas are better than you think. 1 out of 5 times you'll get an std. | [ 5.89668714e-02 -2.45463643e-02 1.12747937e-03 2.66074650e-02
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6,067 | 6,068 | Why was the shower crying It was being used. | [-5.33063523e-03 8.70601162e-02 1.50014907e-01 4.95295785e-02
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6,068 | 6,069 | [Captain America, minutes after the love of his life's funeral] Damn her niece is hot | [-2.86752116e-02 2.22802698e-03 -2.14283671e-02 -3.83653976e-02
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6,069 | 6,070 | What do you get if you mix a rhetorical question and a joke? | [-2.17786208e-02 2.59630308e-02 -8.29498656e-03 3.65657732e-02
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6,070 | 6,071 | Have you heard the Eric Garner joke? It's so funny I can't breathe Edit: Woah gold, thank you kind stranger :D | [-4.86001605e-03 -2.70702057e-02 2.34208182e-02 9.78466216e-03
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6,071 | 6,072 | The animals that like to be pet are the ones that feel the best to touch how dope is that | [-8.31964239e-03 -6.82197884e-02 1.31245241e-01 6.26427233e-02
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6,072 | 6,073 | Two fish are in a tank... The first fish says to the second fish, "How do we drive this thing?" | [-4.18291315e-02 4.05372418e-02 -4.82256375e-02 5.86149544e-02
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6,073 | 6,074 | why do JEWS have big noses ? air is free | [ 9.08323675e-02 7.44056627e-02 2.33718958e-02 7.35727102e-02
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6,074 | 6,075 | If you're unsure if you're pregnant or not that's called a maby | [-6.75374344e-02 -5.90476766e-02 -1.29783293e-02 2.46419758e-02
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6,075 | 6,076 | [prison riot] *standing over my origami ducks* "GO AROUND! GO AROUND!" | [ 2.16760132e-02 6.21748455e-02 -4.65546623e-02 -1.64781641e-02
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6,076 | 6,077 | What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other? Isaiah! | [-1.24571174e-02 4.36082594e-02 -3.45624574e-02 2.89250743e-02
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6,077 | 6,078 | curious new Snapchat filter shows exact date and time of your death but refuses to be sent. then you notice: the time says five minutes ago. | [-1.61350854e-02 -4.65651834e-03 8.72260481e-02 6.11467753e-03
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6,078 | 6,079 | Tight pants are like a cheap hotel... No ball room | [ 6.21386617e-02 4.82674241e-02 -1.06401760e-02 2.79736053e-02
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6,080 | 6,081 | I got a job at the circus circumcising baby elephants. It pays peanuts, but the tips are huge. | [-3.34383808e-02 4.76365313e-02 5.28119355e-02 5.92497624e-02
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6,081 | 6,082 | There are 11 types of people in this world.. a) those that understand Roman numerals. b) those that don't understand Roman numerals. | [ 1.16832554e-03 -4.25138185e-03 6.09225295e-02 -8.48832577e-02
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6,082 | 6,083 | A woman walks into a bar with a duck under her arm Nice pig says the bartender. It's a duck she says. I was talking to the duck says the bartender. | [-2.31389003e-03 -4.73775864e-02 1.02368779e-02 5.29878251e-02
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6,083 | 6,084 | An apple a day... Keeps the non-binary away | [ 4.62598763e-02 6.84380457e-02 -1.21623799e-02 2.60129664e-02
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6,084 | 6,085 | KIM KARDASHIAN: Elane you GOTA see the BABY ELANE: I follow you on instagram. Im gona see it | [-3.34843881e-02 -2.94690803e-02 -6.50659995e-03 1.39902427e-03
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6,085 | 6,086 | What's the best thing about turning 65? No more calls from insurance salesmen. | [ 1.71114244e-02 1.41269222e-01 -6.56892033e-03 -1.89205706e-02
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6,086 | 6,087 | I like mixing laxatives and nitrous oxide on a regular basis, but it's OK... ...I only do it for shits and giggles. | [ 1.54768620e-02 -1.39552906e-01 2.28094701e-02 6.60694316e-02
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6,087 | 6,088 | How many Dragon Ball characters does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just 1, but It'll take 7 episodes for him to do it. | [ 2.63822526e-02 2.14944798e-02 3.14093716e-02 -2.09677014e-02
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6,088 | 6,089 | "Babe, is it in?" *"Yea."* **"Does it hurt?"** *"Uh huh."* **"Let me put it in slowly."** *"It still hurts."* **"Okay, let's try another shoe size."** | [ 1.56731792e-02 4.26471718e-02 4.80515845e-02 3.52737233e-02
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6,089 | 6,090 | Seriously considering telling the CDC I have Ebola, so they'll clean my house. | [ 4.90228273e-02 1.61213223e-02 8.39290917e-02 -2.02545524e-02
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6,090 | 6,091 | Why'd you order the Fish n' Chips? For the Halibut. | [-7.88968652e-02 5.92258200e-02 -2.14411921e-04 -1.14846593e-02
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6,091 | 6,092 | Friend: "Hey, that girl is cute. Can you put in a good word for me?" Me: "Sure" *walks up to girl* *whispers* "magnanimous" | [-9.63136274e-03 2.53298022e-02 6.89395294e-02 2.43602358e-02
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6,092 | 6,093 | What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? Coach. What do you call one white guy surrounded by 100 black guys? Warden. | [-1.69652291e-02 2.96127200e-02 -1.08457163e-01 -1.32375462e-02
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6,093 | 6,094 | What do you get when you cross Christmas and a Duck? A Christmas-Quacker! | [-1.56385899e-02 7.43936896e-02 -4.00132798e-02 2.23366953e-02
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6,094 | 6,095 | Someone just caught me picking my nose at a stop light. Had to just cut my losses and run the red light. | [ 1.89945363e-02 2.58503240e-02 7.80078098e-02 7.60209933e-02
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6,095 | 6,096 | What do you call a bird with big boobs? A para-teet. | [ 6.17733337e-02 6.35974109e-03 -3.60462070e-02 5.01451790e-02
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6,096 | 6,097 | The most romantic movie of all time is definitely Pixar's UP. That old man really loved his house. | [-4.87852693e-02 -1.25546157e-02 4.64746282e-02 -1.66116450e-02
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6,097 | 6,098 | Being rich is like being pregnant Everyone is happy for you, but no one asks how many times you were screwed to get there. | [ 4.05192934e-02 3.14917378e-02 1.62447616e-02 9.05000269e-02
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6,098 | 6,099 | The hardest part of being a congressman must be pretending to actually like the people where you're from. | [ 4.23289416e-03 -7.61844367e-02 1.16843350e-01 1.99424252e-02
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6,099 | 6,100 | Why did the blonde have a sore belly-button? Because she had a blond boyfriend. | [-5.27361371e-02 -6.04185015e-02 3.29279676e-02 9.84532237e-02
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2.19056197e-02 1.03141911e-01 -2.67393962e-02 -1.19903438e-01
4.36985753e-02 1.04575064e-02 -2.61868779e-02 1.11560352e-01
3.18977679e-03 -9.14188549e-02 1.24019034e-01 4.50333580e-03] |
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