Title
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⌀ | Dialogue
stringlengths 1
1.92k
| Speaking Character
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| Addressed Character
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THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | George sits down next to two attractive women. | Int. Movie Theater - Day | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Ladies. I, uh, I haven't seen this before. | George | Int. Movie Theater - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | What is that dot? | Lady 1 | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Oh, I think someone has one of those funny laser pointers. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | A red laser moves around the movie screen. Everyone laughs as the dot rests on the breasts of the movie actress. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | The laser pointer guy uses his laser to point at a box of Skittles and RC Cola. | Int. Movie Lobby - Day | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Gimme a box of those and one of those. | Laser Guy | Int. Movie Lobby - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Excuse me, are you the guy with that funny laser? | George | Laser Guy |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | The laser's not funny. I'm funny. | Laser Guy | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Yeah. The thing is, I, uh...I had this little zinger of my own I wanted to try. | George | Laser Guy |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Uh-huh. | Laser Guy | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | It's right in the explosion scene. So if you could just...leave me a little window. You know, my, uh, my aunt had a thing removed with a laser. All right, I don't want to interrupt your meal, so... | George | Laser Guy |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Kramer and Jerry sit listening to the radio. | Int. Jerry's Car - Day | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | RADIO What a comeback for the New York Mets-- 6 runs in the bottom of the ninth. | Int. Jerry's Car - Day | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I've gotta see this game. If it wasn't for this guy, we could get out of here. | Jerry | Int. Jerry's Car - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | This traffic's a killer, ain't it? | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | You want to get outta here? Here's what we do. We leave the car here, we take the plates off, we scratch the serial number off the engine block, and we walk away. | Kramer | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Walk away? | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | You've got insurance. You tell them that the car was stolen, and then you get another one free. | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Isn't there a deductible? | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right, what is your deductible? | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I don't know. | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Yes, because they've already deducted it. | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | From what? | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | The car, which we're leaving. So the net is zero. See you pocket the money, if there is any, and you get a new car. | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | We're not leaving the car! | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right. If you refuse to grow up and scam your insurance company, you'll have to work this out with maroon Golf. | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Absolutely not. He sped up. | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Swung on, line hard toward left center field. That's in the gap, that's a base hit. | Radio | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I'm ready to talk. | Jerry | Radio |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | George and the ladies are sitting in their seats. | Int. Movie Theater - Day | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey! There's that laser guy again. | Lady 1 | Int. Movie Theater - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | He's funny. I never meet anyone funny. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I know. A sense of humor is so much more important to me than looks or hair. | Lady 1 | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Mmm, yeah. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | There's an explosion on the screen. The laser moves around the screen and everyone laughs. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | That's gotta hurt! | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Everyone stops laughing. | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | It's...gotta hurt! Hurt! Because...Aaarrrrrgh! | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | George stands up. | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Damn you, laser guy! You had to grab it all with your lowbrow laser shtick! You're just a prop comic! Where's the craft?! | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | The laser guy points the laser at George's head. | George | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Look! It's on the bald guy. | Lady 1 | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I am so glad we came to this showing. | Lady 2 | Lady 1 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Kramer is talking to Lamar while Jerry waits in his car. Kramer walks to Jerry. | Ext. City Street - Day | Lady 2 |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Ok, here's the deal. He wants you to acknowledge that you cut him off with an "I am sorry" wave. | Kramer | Ext. City Street - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | What's that? | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | You raise the hand, lower the head-- "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. The buttons are really big on the car. I don't understand it. I haven't read the manual. Ooh!" You get my drift. | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Ok! | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Jerry puts both hands up over his head and does the "I'm Sorry" wave. | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hallelujah. Praise the lord. But I'll take it. | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Yes! All right, Lamar, back it up a little bit so we can get out now. | Kramer | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Kramer gets in the car. George shows up and climbs into the back seat. | Kramer | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right. At last, we're finally gettin' out of here. | George | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | What's that on your forehead? | Jerry | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | It's probably chocolate. | George | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey, is that one of those laser pointers? | Jerry | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey, Jerry, crank up the Floyd. It's a George laserium! | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right, stop it! Stay away from my breasts! Chest! | George | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | See ya around maroon Golf. And, by the way, that was an "I'm not sorry" wave. | Jerry | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | What was that? | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I'm glad I cut you off, because black Saab rules! So long, jackass! | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | As Jerry pulls into the one way street, a taxi comes down the street and blocks him in. In the taxi is Elaine. | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine?! | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Jerry?! | Elaine | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Jackass? So I'm a jackass now? | Lamar | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | The apartment is empty. | Int. Jerry's Apartment - Day | Ext. Jerry's Apartment - Day - Establishing |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Jerry stands in front of the one way street yelling at the cars. | Ext. City Street - Day | Int. Jerry's Apartment - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | So if everyone would just put their cars in reverse at the same time, we can do this. All right, on the count of three. Can everyone hear me? Hey, amigo, are you paying attention? | Jerry | Ext. City Street - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Buenos dias, my friend. | Puerto Rican Man | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Not you! The guy in the Amigo. | Jerry | Puerto Rican Man |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine sits frustrated in the cab. | Int. Taxi Cab - Day | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Uh, well, uh, here--here is good. | Elaine | Int. Taxi Cab - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Oh, yeah, sure, and now I'm gonna be stuck here. But you knew the way to go! You went to college! | Taxi Driver | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey, I went to Tufts! That was my safety school! So don't talk to me about hardship. | Elaine | Taxi Driver |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | She pays the driver and gets out. | Elaine | Taxi Driver |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine walks up to Jerry. | Ext. City Street - Day | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Boy, eh, can you believe this mess? | Elaine | Ext. City Street - Day |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine, why did you have the cab come down the street?! We were almost out! | Jerry | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | So that was your girlfriend that blocked you in. That's real good. | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I'm not his girlfriend. Well, actually, we used to date, but not anymore. | Elaine | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine, he doesn't need- | Jerry | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Used to date? So I guess you found out he's a jackass. | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | 'Cause that's what's gonna happen. | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Kramer and George walk along eating churros. | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Wow. He's givin' you a mustache. Where is this guy? | Kramer | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Don't look around. Don't look around. That's what he wants. | George | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right. Well, I'll see ya. Hey, George, I think there's a sniper lookin' to pop ya. | Elaine | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Elaine leaves. | Elaine | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | This thing can't hurt me, can it? I mean, it is a laser. What if it hits my eye? | George | Elaine |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I don't know. | Jerry | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | I can't be blind, Jerry The blind are courageous. | George | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | You'll be fine as long as it doesn't hit you right in the pupil, 'Cause then the whole ball will go up like the Death Star. Tchoo! I gotta go find a bathroom. | Kramer | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Kramer leaves. | Kramer | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hold it, George. Don't move. It's right between your eyes. | Jerry | Kramer |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Oh, my god. | George | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey, there's the soda guy. | Jerry | George |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | Hey, jackass! Get me a diet Dr. Pepper! | Lamar | Jerry |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | All right! | Jerry | Lamar |
THE PUERTO RICAN DAY | null | George stands petrified. | Jerry | Lamar |
Subsets and Splits