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So i have lived with my friend for 5 months now and we’ve been friends for 13 years. We both have kids she has a 2 year old i have a 1 year old. Just some background if y’all were curious.
So anyway I’m one of the millions of people who got laid off. So i obviously just stay home with my daughter. I do all the chores now too now that I’m not working but i am still paying my half of the bills. My friend is an apartment manager and is still working. And she is getting a stupid amount of perks right now for working like, being about to work from home, a raise, half days off, and paid punches.
This morning i was walking my friend and her daughter to the car and my friend said she’s getting lunch with her boss because of the paid lunches. I said mockingly because you’re essential and she said exactly. I then said you’re not essential. Which she said back at least I’m not sitting home all day of the couch.
I didn’t think i was an asshole for saying she wasn’t essential but now I’m thinking i shouldn’t of been so dismissive of her work.
Amita for saying my friend isn’t essential. ###### | YTA, She's definitely an essential worker, especially right now when everyone is at home, and utilities are being stressed to the max. So many issues that never arose in apartments (because of varying schedules) will now be an issue. She probably has to work out social distancing measures, complaints, utilities, everything. I don't know how this didn't strike you. ###### |
For some context I am 17F and coworker (let’s say Stacey) is mid 50’sF. We both work in the checkout section of a supermarket and our whole team are quite close so share a lot of our lives with each other.
Stacey likes to engage with the younger group of our team which is great, however she likes to get a little to personal with her questions. For example, over New Years a couple of other girls were talking about the party and she said to them “remember your condoms and plan B girls!”. She also likes to comment on the physical appearance of younger male customers and it makes everyone uncomfortable.
Now, my boyfriend also works in the same supermarket, we are both Christian’s and very open about our faith and the fact that we are choosing not to have sex because as aforementioned we are a very close team so share a lot with each other.
However; Stacey likes to make very inappropriate jokes about us, I brought myself a ring a while ago and she noticed it asking if it was “from my lover”. After asking her to call him by his name, she continues to call him my lover, despite the fact that I am clearly uncomfortable as are people nearby.
She continues to ask my about my sexual preferences as well as the other girls and we have all expressed our discomfort and the fact we don’t like her to each other.
So, WIBTA if I told her that we don’t like her and that she needs to mind her own business? ###### | YTA, She needs to understand that unless you're inviting her to have that conversation, it isn't appropriate for work.
Ask her to stop and if she doesn't pursue other means to stop the behavior like speaking with mgmt or HR.
That said it doesn't mean you can make the jump that no one likes her. That feels needlessly mean spirited when she likely is coming from a place of genuinely trying to befriend you.
Talk to her about it and give her a chance to course correct imo. ###### |
Me(15m) and my sister(22f) play the same online game which I will not be saying what. The game has 3 currencies and works like this:
1 is for the in-game stuffs, rewarded by clearing dungeons and tradable in the player market. 1 is for the cash shop, purchased with real life money, not tradable in game and can only buy items in the cash shop. The 3rd one is a currency that can buy both in-game stuffs and a limited selection of cash shop stuffs, also can be traded in the player market.
I have been playing around with the 3 currencies, having multiple accounts, tracking the market prices and making a "cheat sheet" out of it, where I figure out the time to buy things with 1 currency and sell them in another, and profit from the difference in between. I have been making a good profit of it in the game, and even traded some of them with real life money, not much but it's the sense of achievement that counts.
My sister who plays the same game has been jealous that I have become a "rich player" without spending too much money. Ever since she lost her job she had been trying to do what I did but never had the patience for it. She had been asking me for my cheat sheet but I won't lend her, I don't want competition in the game and they are MY hardwork.
Today we had an argument as she accused me for having no life and a hacker(no I don't), then tried to tear up my cheat sheet. I got mad too and called her a jobless loser who fails at everything and can't even win her little brother in game without begging. She actually broke down and cried.
What happens exceeds the word count, I just want to ask right now AITA? ###### | YTA, she lost her job and probably isn"t feeling great, she likes the game so you could have helped her out to make her feel better but you don't want her to be competition ? Ridiculous.. Instead you decided to trash talk her and go where it hurts the most. You f up and should apologize, and provide support, not be a dong. I can't imagine how awful she must feel that her little brother sees her that way, she probably felt insecure about losing her job, and if she didn't she does now, congrats you were a shitty brother and shoulf know better. She was wrong for insuting you first but you took it too far. ###### |
Ao my fiancé works nights and sleeps during the day which is fine. I have no problem with that but lately for the past 2-3 weeks whenever I make dinner and try to wake her up to come eat, she gets all agitated and doesn’t eat which pisses me off big time.
It’s not like I wake her up at like 5-6 in the afternoon, I always wake her up at 8-9 PM to eat, so that way she can enjoy her meal and get some more rest before starting work at 12. It just really frustrates me because I love eating together and I always look forward to eating together and chatting rubbish you know ?
Idk maybe I should let her sleep til 9/10 and then eat ? But then she doesn’t have enough time to let the food digest and stuff like that..
Please let me know if I’m being an asshole because I am just so tired and upset over something so small like this ###### | YTA, she clearly doesn't want you to be waking her up to eat with her, but you've kept doing it. It's hard when you can't see each other as often or conveniently, and it's definitely something to talk about with her and find a compromise to make it work, but the way you're going about it is inconsiderate. ###### |
Last night she put a pizza in the oven and when the timer went off I took it out. I yelled to the other room that the pizza was done and she yelled back for me to cut it. The scissors were handy and the knives were dirty so I thought to heck lets try it. Anyways, TLDR: I dont want to use anything else to cut pizza with now and she's mad at me even though I cleaned them. ###### | YTA, sewing scissors can be incredibly expensive if they were high quality, and they should only ever be used to cut fabric. You're probably never going to get all the pizza out. You should apologize profusely and offer to buy her a new pair. ###### |
So in February my sister (12f) confided in me (21f) that she had started her period. Our mom died about four years ago so she didn’t feel comfortable telling our dad just yet. I told him and he had a conversation with her about it. I wanted to make her more comfortable with the whole concept of her starting puberty and stuff so I decided I would throw her a surprise period party. My intention wasn’t necessarily to embarrass her, like it’s my job as her older sister to humiliate her but I mainly just wanted to make her more comfortable.
I went all out. I got balloons printed, banners printed, made a cake with a pool of red icing and a barbie sitting in it, and I invited all her friends. My dad knew of the party and didn’t approve of the idea, but let me do it as he thought I knew what was best. He took my sister out shopping in the morning whilst we were preparing and then we could surprise her. A few of our family members were there too.
She came home and I was expecting her to find it hysterical. All her friends were saying they wish someone had done it for them and thought she’d find it funny. The second she walks through the door and realises what’s going on she starts crying and runs upstairs to her room, apparently absolutely mortified. I went upstairs to talk to her and she said I had completely humiliated her and that she didn’t want such personal business being spread around by me. She hadn’t told her friends she’d started her period yet. I apologised but told her I thought she’d like it and she told me to get the fuck out of her room.
I spoke to my dad after and we decided that I’d go stay with one of my friends until my sister had calmed down because she was being so over dramatic. Then quarantine happened and I was stuck at my friends house. I went back home today and my sister is still absolutely furious with me and being so dramatic. My dad is saying I was way out of line. AITA? ###### | YTA, seriously?? Not only are you The Asshole for humiliating her on purpose, but you're keeping on being The Asshole for calling her 'dramatic' and totally dismissing her feelings. ###### |
So for the people who dont know. ABG is a popular term used in Asian American culture where a asain female goes and takes a lot from black and white culture and is normally talking to a lot of guys at once.
Now this morning I woke to find out my(15M) sister(18F) dyed her hair blond. Which I then made a comment saying "ah we are going full ABG I see." She ask what I meant which I said that she dyed her hair blond. She then said that doesnt mean I'm a ABG I just wanted to try something new. I told her she wears a lot of street wear and drink a lot if boba not to be a ABG. She reminded me that I wear a lot of the same brands she does and I agreed. She then got really upset which I tried to explain to her i was just joking but she wasnt having any of it and she started coming at me for the stuff i do like how i play a lot of league of legends so i must be a stereotype. I told her she was taking it way to personally and i left the room. ###### | YTA, not only are you judging your younger sister for her clothing choices and food which sets her up for a lifetime of insecurity but you’re gripping to this idea of “Asian purity” and implying that she’s a traitor for liking these things. Things that you say you also like/wear... ###### |
I (18f) has a boyfriend “Ed” (18m) who has a childhood friend “Kate” (18f) who he’s always hanging out with. Kate is friends with almost all of his friends, and lives next door to Ed, so she was almost always around while Ed and I were dating. I got jealous of her. She knows Ed a lot better than I did, is friendlier with his family than I was, and all of his friends liked her a lot better than me.
I told Ed I was jealous, and he reassured me that I didn’t need to be. Every time I told him I was jealous, though, he seemed to be getting more and more pissed about it, to the point where if I mentioned Kate, he asked what I was going to be jealous of her for this time. He basically became a dick anytime I mentioned Kate.
Ed and I had a movie date planned, and Kate was set up to watch Ed’s 9 year old brother for the evening. While we were watching the movie, Kate came over and told Ed that his brother had a pretty high fever, and asked what he wanted her to do about it. I got pissed because it’s just a fever, she should know what to do about it, and I told her off. I told her to look it up online if she was really that dumb, and that she needed to stop trying to insert herself into every situation Ed was in. Ed got pissed at me, and told me that I needed to shut up. He told Kate to bring his brother home, and told me that our date (and relationship) was over. When I asked why, he told me that he couldn’t date someone who was “this” jealous over his friend, and that I was just being a cunt. I told him that I wouldn’t be a cunt if he weren’t probably fucking Kate behind my back.
He and Kate both got mad, and I got kicked out of the house.
AITA for telling my boyfriend he was fucking his friend behind my back? ###### | YTA, not jsut for saying that but for how you behaved and not caring that his brother was ill.
Everyone can get a bit jealous sometimes but it's 100% on you how you handle it. You handled it really really badly ###### |
For some insight, I follow a pretty strict skincare regimen (oil cleanse, regular cleanse, chemical exfoliation, dry, tone, serums, mask, moisturize, sleeping mask etc… - I even started sleeping on my back because I learned that it’s better for your skin). My body skincare is also strict since I’ve started using serums on my body to work towards a more even skin tone and softness.
I used to have severe acne as a teen and I’m really proud of how far my skin has come along. Anyway, my skincare routine is a daily ritual that I follow religiously and it takes a lot of time but I am happy with it. My boyfriend \~\~we’ll call him Thomas\~\~ is from the countryside and doesn’t have hygienic practices anywhere near mine. Thomas says that my skincare routine is pretty much nothing but a practice of vanity and that I was even prettier with acne. First of all, I think he’s pretty stupid for saying these things but I’m starting to feel confused.
I worked really, really hard to get my skin to the place where it is now but all he does is use a 4-in-one “men's” body wash/face soap/shampoo/conditioner/anal douche or whatever. The real kicker is that his skin is immaculate. I’m in a bit of rage lately since it feels like Thomas literally hasn’t worked for anything that he’s ever received in life but I'm constantly working towards making things work in what feels like every possible way. Anyway, I’m at a point where I don't even want him to touch me at all because when we cuddle, I feel grime from his sweat. The worst is when I feel clean after a shower and he tries to make moves on me WHILE my serums dry- I naturally reject his body almost every time. AITA? ###### | YTA, not for your skincare regime, but because you appear to have rage against your boyfriend just because he had an easier time than you. How tf is that his fault? ###### |
My wife (30F) and I (28M) have an 8 month old daughter. Since she was born my wife has not done anything besides go to work, and take care of baby. I, on the other hand, have gone to work, gone skiing, played golf, done yard work, and done other house projects and of course, taken care of baby too.
And before anyone jumps down my throat, I love my wife and my daughter more than anything in the world and love being with them. I also believe I can be a better dad and husband when I have a release and something that brings me joy outside of being with them. To me, my hobbies are therapeutic to my mind and allow me to unplug for a couple hours per week.
The other day I told my wife that she should take up some hobbies. I told her to join a volleyball league (she played in college and was pretty good), she should go for a bike ride, play golf or go skiing - anything to give her an outlet and not just go to work and come home and watch baby. She views being a mom as her job, her passion and her hobby. It is one of the things I admire most about her but I also feel it is important for her to have a hobby outside of being a mom and something that brings her joy, a release and an outlet for the frustrations of being a new parent.
This conversation did not go well and she left the room crying because I stuck to my argument that she needed a hobby and she disagreed and didn't want to be away from baby any more than she had to be. Selfishly, I want her to have a hobby that she can do while I watch baby so I don't have to feel as guilty when I am doing my hobbies and she is watching baby.
AITA for wanting her to have a hobby so I can feel less guilty about mine? ###### | YTA, not for the sentiment (which I actually agree with) but for the way you expressed it. She just made a human and then ejected it from her body, so the insistence that she relearn a sport or similar is probably both exhausting and self-esteem issue inducing. I'm sure there are a number of things you could suggest that would both assuage your guilt for enjoying your hobbies, demonstrate your appreciation for her parenting, and provide her with opportunities to carve out some space for "me" time. Honestly, buying her a book or movie she likes, or watching the kid while she meets a friend for coffee, gets a pedicure, massage or haircut, or even maybe a yoga class or trip to the pool, is likely to be way less pressure than "hey I think you and your post baby body should definitely take up this sport you havent played since hs" ###### |
Restaurants Just opened in my city where I am, so I wanted to just relax with and talk with my family. We missed times like this so we figured it was the right time.
I told her let's go some where a little nicer than usual. Meaning like upscale place. I wanted to eat good that night. Told her it was a steak house, didn't ask anymore questions so told her nothing else really about it. Figured she would know it cost a little more since I told her it was something nicer. Picked her up and we headed the restaurant.
We get there, she says "STK huh", I said "yeah, have you ever been here", she responded with "nope" told her she in for suprise. We walk up and get seated, I can tell shes impressed by the environment of the place. We get handed our menus, she looks at up at me almost immediately. Didn't even say say anything to me just looked at me. Face of shock. After looking at the menu for the couple's of minutes, she asked on how much we exactly plan on spending. Told her I'm going to get a steak, so I have no idea.
Staters alone are $20 then entrees vary from $40 to $50. I ended up spending $110 that night, she spent $60. We had good conversations throughout dinner but when it was over she told me I wish I told her exactly how expensive it was before. For she could've know how much she planned on spending. ###### | YTA, not everyone has the same amount of disposable income that you do, and you could have at least told her the name of the place so she could have looked up the menu and price range ahead of time. She might have just blown most of her grocery budget for the entire week on one dinner, but out of politeness/obligation/embarassment will never say so. ###### |
Pretty much the title. Throwaway
My roommate has a short hallway leading to to her room, she has claimed the space even though it is technically not hers.
She has a new age-y altar that sits in the hallway. It is filled with candles. It has dried flowers, money, sometimes honey and other things. She has a couple of different gods and religious symbols from different religions as the focus.
She has the altar all lit up tonight, and it looks really cool, so I snapped a few pictures of it and posted them on my Instagram.
She saw the pictures and came to me yelling and upset. She wanted me to take the pictures down. She wasn’t nice about it at all. She demanded that I take them down, rather than asking. She offered no explanation as to why I can’t post a picture of something in my house.
I told her that technically her “altar” is a public space and if she doesn’t want anyone to see it she should put it inside the room that she actually pays for. It’s mostly decoration anyway. Also if she wants me to take pictures down she can approach me appropriately.
She is not calming down though, so I’m wondering if this is really a big deal. If it is, I can probably smooth it over since it just happened AITA. ###### | YTA, most of all for not taking down the pictures when she clearly feel very upset and violated by them. You do understand this is probably part of her religion, right? ###### |
My wife and I have a 6yo son. I grew up racing dirt bikes from the age of 5 and never stopped. My son has been asking to get one so I talked to my wife about it and she said no because it’s “too dangerous”.
Yeah you are bound to fall and break bones, but racing teaches you to not give up, and it’s a lot of fun, and my son is very interested.
I went on Friday and picked him up one and my wife is furious, she said he’s going to die on this death machine and wants me to sell it now. I don’t think it’s fair to my son to say he can’t ride but I can. So AITA here? ###### | YTA, marriage and raising kids is a partnership. Why even talk to her if you were just going to do what you wanted anyways? Also, you seem very cavalier about breaking bones... ###### |
I (17m) will be moving out soon to go to uni. My sister (12) has made jokes about how she can't wait for me to move out so she can have my room, which is substantially bigger than hers. I said she couldn't have it as I plan to stay with my family a lot and don't want to be kicked out of the room I grew up in. When I said this my mum got angry and said it was selfish but my dads on my side.
I wouldn't mind if they moved house and then I got the smaller room but I don't think it's fair to get kicked out of the room I grew up in when I plan to stay with them a lot.
AITA? ###### | YTA, let her have it. You’ve moved on to university. It’s part of growing up. She’s the teenager of the house now. ###### |
My sister (22f) was recently terminated from her sales clerk position. she worked enough hours to pay her bills and her share of rent with her roommate but had no savings. she's been a thorn in my side and the family's side this happening; crying, fits of anger, you get the idea
I have 2 kids, one who is on the spectrum (8m). the other is 5f. I've been searching and searching for a sitter/tutor to get some down time for myself. I saw this as a win win situation and offered my sister to watch my kids a few times the week. of course I wouldn't be able to pay her as much as she needed but it would be something to hold her over until she found something else.
before I can even get into it she rejects my offer. I try again a week later and again she says no. but of course she's whining to our parents about having no job. UM WHAT?! I finally call her out at the easter reunion saying I offered a job as a sitter/tutor and she rejected it so obviously she's not that desperate. she got snappy back and said yeah I want a real job, not working with your bratty, unbehaved kids so you can paint your nails and sit on your ass all day
I was livid and my husband had to get her out of the house before I did something rash. I text her later that day that I have no sympathy for the situation she PUT HERSELF INTO and have told my parents not to give her the slightest pity either. Her behavior is disgusting when all I was trying to do was help ###### | YTA, just because she's in between jobs doesn't mean she's cheap child care for you. Get over yourself, damn. ###### |
This happened back in September, but it's still a tension point for me. I'm nearly 60, and I have two daughters. First one is 26, still lives with me rent-free while she works full-time. Second one is 21 and in her last year of college.
My first daughter, who we'll call A, went to a state school and commuted from home and so her college tuition wasn't too hard on me, and she has no debts. Since she lives at home for free she's been able to save a lot of money. She helps here and there with groceries and such, but not nearly enough. My younger daughter, "D", chose to go to a private university out of state that's very costly, but I wanted her to have the full college experience and enjoy herself. However it's become very expensive for me to keep up with her tuition, rent, and sorority payments. The beginning of last semester I was about $12,000 short.
I asked A in September if I cold borrow $12,000 for her sister's tuition, promising that I would pay her back within the month. She didn't react well and said no, saying that she was uncomfortable with that and why couldn't her sister just take out a loan? But I don't want that, as D isn't very responsible with money and I don't want her to have that on her plate. As a result, I had to do a ton of extra work and dip into my stocks to pay off the tuition. I'm still pretty upset that A wouldn't loan me the money. We're family, does she not trust me? And I let her live here rent free, why can't she help out her sister? AITA? ###### | YTA, it's not your daughters job to finance her sister's university. As she said, either you should take a loan and pay for it yourself or the sister should. Just because she lives with you rent free doesn't mean you get to demand $12,000 for her sister's university course. ###### |
So in February my sister (12f) confided in me (21f) that she had started her period. Our mom died about four years ago so she didn’t feel comfortable telling our dad just yet. I told him and he had a conversation with her about it. I wanted to make her more comfortable with the whole concept of her starting puberty and stuff so I decided I would throw her a surprise period party. My intention wasn’t necessarily to embarrass her, like it’s my job as her older sister to humiliate her but I mainly just wanted to make her more comfortable.
I went all out. I got balloons printed, banners printed, made a cake with a pool of red icing and a barbie sitting in it, and I invited all her friends. My dad knew of the party and didn’t approve of the idea, but let me do it as he thought I knew what was best. He took my sister out shopping in the morning whilst we were preparing and then we could surprise her. A few of our family members were there too.
She came home and I was expecting her to find it hysterical. All her friends were saying they wish someone had done it for them and thought she’d find it funny. The second she walks through the door and realises what’s going on she starts crying and runs upstairs to her room, apparently absolutely mortified. I went upstairs to talk to her and she said I had completely humiliated her and that she didn’t want such personal business being spread around by me. She hadn’t told her friends she’d started her period yet. I apologised but told her I thought she’d like it and she told me to get the fuck out of her room.
I spoke to my dad after and we decided that I’d go stay with one of my friends until my sister had calmed down because she was being so over dramatic. Then quarantine happened and I was stuck at my friends house. I went back home today and my sister is still absolutely furious with me and being so dramatic. My dad is saying I was way out of line. AITA? ###### | YTA, it was her personal business and you spread it to anyone who would listen. why would a 12 yr old be thrilled about people knowing whats going one with her uterus. what in the ever loving fuck made you think this was a good idea. I sincerely hope this is a troll. ###### |
My fiance and I had booked a weekend at a glamping resort for a weekend in April. We paid in full for the two nights upfront and they have a zero refund cancellation policy, however, if you cancel in time they will issue a credit to be used at a later date. Now, due to covid the reservation was canceled, and we were issued a credit. When we reached out to book at a later date during the summer they are charging us more since it is high season, and when we asked about our options for booking at the original rate they told us to book during the week or later in the year (November through March, not on a holiday). We feel our money is now being held hostage and we either have to pay more or book at a bad time so I called and disputed the charge with our credit card. We normally wouldn't try to get the money back but because of covid we don't know what the future will hold and we don't know if the credit would even cover a trip in the future due to their policies. AITA? ###### | YTA, it sucks that they didn't offer a refund considering it was cancelled due to COVID but you paid and likely signed a contract accepting the terms of no refund. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean you're entitled to your money back and the bank will probably not accept the charge back because you agreed to this ###### |
I’m using a throwaway because she knows my main. So basically, my girlfriend and I live together. Everyday when we’re about to have whatever meal or anything, she closely inspects each and every glass, plate, fork, knife, etc.
They way she inspects it is by firstly sliding it through her fingers (she washes her hands before doing so) to feel if there’s anything stuck on, and then she brings it up close to her face to look closer. It’s really irritating and I’ve asked her to just wash everything herself if she has such an issue with these stuff, but she ignores me.
Whenever we used to go to restaurants, although she would never put her hands all of the glass and utensils, she’d still look closely at them before using, and imo that’s just an embarrassing thing to do in public.
Last night, I tried to have a discussion with her about her behaviour, and she said that it’s just something she does and she can’t help it, because she feels gross if she doesn’t. I still don’t want her doing it because I feel gross knowing that her hands have been all over everything. It got pretty heated and I ended sleeping on the couch. This morning we still didn’t talk and now she’s at work.
So reddit, AITA here? ###### | YTA, it shouldn’t matter and it shouldn’t be her responsibility to do all the dishes just because you’re not thorough enough ###### |
English isn’t my first language, sorry if this is confusing to read.
I have been living with her and my best friend (M23) for a few months. Since she is a party girl who’s rarely at the apt at night and I had classes we rarely saw each other until now because we are stuck here.
This girl has some weird food habits. She peels hotdogs. She won’t let food touch on her plate and eats all of one thing, then all of the next. She acually won’t eat rice or beans because she can’t eat the grains one by one. She disassembles the pizza, eats the condiments separately and disposes of the tomato sauce and bread part... and many more. I used to think it was funny.
Two days ago I made spaghetti for dinner. She told me that she won’t eat pasta with any kind of sauce and that even the smell of tomato sauce made her sick so I cooked the sad, sauceless spaghetti the way she liked and put the sauce on the side. At dinner, she started picking the ”pieces” of the spaghetti and eating them one by one. With her hands.
I asked her what the hell she was doing and she became defensive. She told me she always washes her hands before eating so I told her it’s still gross and that I don’t want to see this and that either she leaves the table or I do. She left and locked herself in her room. My friend then told me that was not nice and we talked about it during dinner. I don’t think I’m wrong, but since she isn’t very good at dealing with her feelings, I figured I should apologize and suck it up.
Yesterday I tried to apologize to her but she’s ignoring me. She’s been eating everything with her hands ever since. I don’t know what she’s trying to do but it makes me sick and when it’s meal time and she starts eating with her hands I say the same thing I did: either you leave or I do.
AITA? ###### | YTA, it seems like perhaps she has some sort of compulsion, perhaps OCD? She clearly feels defensive about it, you don't need to continue to push her on it. If you don't want to eat with her, don't eat with her, but don't keep arguing with her about it. ###### |
So the situation is a bit sad all around.
We are two sisters, I'm the oldest, I'm 28. My little sister is 22 and in university. Our dad is kind of a deadbeat, so we just have our mother, who is 51.
Our mother really really wants grandchildren. She loved being a mother, she misses having little kids around. All her friends and colleagues are becoming grandparents right now and it's making it even worse for her.
Here is the thing. I want children as well, unfortunately I am infertile. It is extremely hard for me and my husband. We can't afford alternative ways of conceiving. My husband doesn't want to adopt, and I'm not too sure about it myself anyway. So we have to live with the grief of being forcibly childless. I know learning it was extremely hard on my mother. Of course she was sad for me, but she was also sad fpr herself. But there was still my little sister left.
My little sister has often said she didn't want children but in all honesty, she is 22. And she started saying it as a teenager because she knew it pissed off our mother.
A week ago, she confided to me that she got sterilized a few months ago. I honestly had no idea someone would ever be willing to sterilize someone so young, it's crazy to think about. She said she doesn't know yet when/if she'll tell our mother, because she knows it will be a mess. Honestly...If you aren't ready to tell your own mother, then you aren't ready for sterilization, but whatever it's too late anyway.
I think it is unfair to keep our mother hanging and hoping like that. Especially since my little sister met her boyfriend, our mother has been very hopeful. Of course she wants her to finish her studies, but she thinks grandchildren are definitely in her future. She talks about it, about what kind of grandma she will be. It's unfair to her, I think it would hurt her more to learn about it later. So, WIBTA for telling her about the sterilization? ###### | YTA, in no way is that your information to share.
Also,
>If you aren't ready to tell your own mother, then you aren't ready for sterilization
This is nonsense. Plenty of people don't share intimate medical details with their parents, that doesn't mean they are too immature to make those decisions. ###### |
I know, it sounds like a favor. But isn’t this also a bit of being nosy?
We are all at their retreat and having a nice time. He doesn’t say much: takes his ultrasonic turbo jet and decides to wash my car. Granted, my car was dirty. But isn’t that my call to make?
So then my wife asks why I didn’t go compliment my in-law because he washed my car. Mind that this is a somewhat repetitive behavior of his: mind other people’s business. Gee, he hands me napkins when he sees my hands are dirty because I *might* need them.
So fine, he wanted to wash it with my 4 year old, that was considered at some point, and I also didn’t like that because it’s a dad-son thing I could do myself. But I’d be ok with that. Yet, my 4yo didn’t join him, and he still didn’t give up the idea. He spent 2 hours washing my car, when nobody asked him to.
Of course, I’ll say eventually that yeah, looks great, thanks. But if I’m to be honest, I don’t like that. It’s like saying “your car is too dirty” or something.
To illustrate my point to my wife, I said “imagine by mom entering our house, removing our curtains and laundering them. What would you make of it?”.
So, AITA for not being particularly pleased? ###### | YTA, I’m not sure what your issue is with your FIL, but you are being unreasonable.
He hands you napkins when your hands are dirty? What a travesty.
He wanted to wash the car with his grandson? Then you whine that should be a father/son activity.
Some people are appreciative when others do things for them. It may also be part of your FIL’s love language, acts of service. He may not vocalize how he feels about you, but he shows he cares for you by doing things for you that he believes to be kind. ###### |
I am a fourteen year old guy.
My birthday is in sixteen days, and my mom is asking for birthday ideas. (Where we should go, what I want, etc)
It’s quite obvious I can’t go to the local amusement park like I wanted. Last year, instead of asking for a gift, I asked if a friend and I could go there. It was really fun, so I wanted to go again. But, like I said, that’s obviously out of the picture.
I told my mom a while back, that for my birthday, from all my family, I only wanted one of two things.
Either a cat, or a dirt bike.
I specifically told her if I got a cat, I’d pay adoption fees, I’d take care of it, and id pay for its food.
And if I got a dirt bike, it didn’t have to be expensive. It could be a used one that’s seconds from falling apart, as long as it worked.
Well, it was a no to both.
She keeps telling me that if I don’t make up my mind for other birthday ideas, I’ll get nothing.
Every time I show mild interest in something, she pretends like I worship and want twenty of them.
She finds every chance she can to push the cat or dirt bike topics out of the picture.
She keeps suggesting I ask for a game, or gaming console, but I don’t want something that will stop me from going outside.
TL:DR; Mom won’t get me one of the two presents I want despite the fact I said I’d help pay for most of them even though they aren’t that expensive in the first place. ###### | YTA, I'm sorry. I remember being a teenager that just wanted to enjoy life and have the means of doing it, but it's bigger than your mom not getting you what you asked for. The cat becomes a presence in her home, and she has to smell the litterbox, engage with your cat, potentially deal with veterinarian things in the future, and so on. The dirtbike could be a safety thing, and she also has to transport you wherever you want to ride your dirtbike, store it, and so on.
You're asking for things that change your mom's life, too. Parents' rules don't always make sense to a teen, and it feels stifling to have any rules when you're getting ready to be an adult. It's going to be pretty great to grow up, adopt a cat, and ride your dirtbike into the sunset. Until then, think of something else you want to save your fifteenth birthday. ###### |
I (23F) was out at a club a couple weeks ago in the pre Covid era with a few friends, including Jane (22F) and my boyfriend Brad (24M). We'd just got inside and Brad left to go to the bathroom, leaving me and Jane alone at the bar. It was super loud and Jane was trying to get the barman's attention. A guy who I'd never met before started hitting on me in a pretty gross way, and I told him I wasn't interested, but he didn't let up. I don't think Jane heard any of this going on because it was so loud in there. I then told the man that I was here with someone, and he said "well I don't see him," as if he didn't believe me, and Brad showed no signs of coming back any time soon, so in a moment of desperation I grabbed Jane around the waist and kinda hauled her onto my lap and said "this is my girlfriend."
The guy finally backed off then, but Jane was really pissed with me because I'd grabbed her and pretended to be her girlfriend without asking her first if it was OK. I told her that it was my last resort and I didn't know what else to do, and she tentatively forgave me, but then yesterday we were all having a Zoom group chat for another friend's birthday and Jane wasn't there. I offhandedly asked someone why Jane hadn't turned up, and someone said that she still felt weird around me after "the girlfriend thing." Apparently she still felt super uncomfortable about me grabbing her like I had. AITA here? I really didn't see that I had any other choice but as a woman I can also appreciate that it was maybe scary for her to just be grabbed in a club. ###### | YTA, I'm sorry. Don't understand all these N.T.A., to be honest. Am I the only one who read that you grabbed her and threw her in your lap?
I think just **saying** that Jane was your girlfriend in a moment of desperation is OK, but why did you have to physically force her into a pose of intimacy? I don't know what kind of relationship you two have, some female friends can be pretty touchy-feely with one another without any sexual undertones, but if Jane felt uncomfortable, I don't think that's the kind of rapport you had pre-established. Pretty ironic that you felt encroached upon by someone and then did the same thing to Jane.
Apart from all of this, I do want to give you some important life advice: don't say you're a lesbian to get rid of an insistent guy. You were lucky this time, but I can tell you from experience that it almost never works. In the best case scenario, the guy just gets more turned on, or feels like you're offering him a challenge. Worst case scenario, he could get violent. This situation could have become dangerous very quickly. ###### |
I’m 24 and am about to finish my first year as a kindergarten teacher. Sadly not the end of the year I hoped, but oh well. This story is about this girl I went to high school with who I’ll call Cal. Cal and I were never particularly friends in high school, we actually did not care for eachother.
She was very loud an obnoxious, and because she was one of the prettier girls in the grade, nobody ever told her to stfu or that she’s being super annoying. Well, besides me. I have known her since we were in 1st grade so I don’t really have a problem with calling her out.
With teacher appreciation week just ending, I of course shared a lot of things on Facebook about being a teacher and how badly I miss my students. Cal did the same thing, albeit a bit more extreme. She posted many things a day about how she can’t wait to get back to her “students” and she misses getting to “experience them learning”.
I put all that in quotes because Cal works at an after school day care center. She does not have a degree in education, I don’t think she has a degree at all. She is not a licensed teacher. She does not have students, she is essentially a babysitter.
I commented on one of her posts, sarcastically congratulating her, asking what grade she taught and if she had any good lesson plan ideas for online classes. My comment was deleted right away, and she messaged me calling me a bitch. Saying that she knew I was trying to make fun of her, but she’s just as much of a teacher as I am since “we work with the same age kids”.
Maybe I was a bit petty, but it’s kind of funny. Aita? ###### | YTA, I'm sorry to say. I have 3 college degrees and taught for 31 years. Many of the para professionals (teaching assistants) I worked with were talented and dedicated teachers, though they did not have degrees.
It sounds like she was a mean girl in high school but you are acting like one now. Please grow up. she took nothing away from you by her posts. ###### |
So last summer my boyfriend (20M) went on an archeological dig in Central America with his professor. He was to be there on the dig with her for 2 weeks and then travel as a tourist with a friend (independent of the professor or university) for 3 weeks. I was having a pretty rough time mental health wise back home and had asked him to call or at least text every night, just so I at least knew he was okay.
He missed one night and the following night I asked him what happened and if everything was okay. He said that he and his professor had gone out the previous night clubbing/bar-hopping and then ended up getting really drunk and spending the night at a stranger's house.
I was of course angry at him for being inconsiderate and overall unfeeling about my position, but I was also concerned that the professor had engaged in this behavior with him. After a few weeks I anonymously reported what had happened to the university--I just couldn't get it out of my head, what would I do if in a few years there was a story of someone being hurt because of them and I hadn't done anything about it? When my boyfriend found out he blew up at me and called me petty, selfish, and dangerous, and that he would never be able to trust or love me again.
This has been several months ago now, but it still hurts. Was I in the wrong? In hindsight I wish I had spoken in person with the head of the department and told by bf what I was going to do before I did it, but I still think it was right to say something. He says no and that I have too much faith in authority and that my morals are guided by just whatever the law/rule. I don't think that at all (if I did wouldn't I have reported him for dealing weed long ago?) but I love him so much, and I believe he loved me. AITA? ###### | YTA, I see nothing wrong here from the prof or your boyfriend or ex most likely. Fuck you are possessive.. ###### |
Background info
I’m 16. My dad married my stepmom like two years ago.
My step mom and I aren’t friendly but we don’t fight. We are just so-so. I’m not crazy about her. She likes to knit and make clothes and for me and my brother. They are always butt ugly.
Last school year my dad didn’t even get my brother and I back to school clothes, he just tried to make us wear her weird 1976 pilgrim clothes. I hate them. I had to beg my mom to get me a couple of outfits that I could actually wear.
My dad gave my brother and I the task of going through our clothes. We tend to give things that we can’t wear anymore to our cousins.
I was trying on clothes and posting silly Instagram stories. A lot of them were in her ugly clothes, and my friends and I had fun roasting them. Then I brought them all down to the pile for going to my cousins.
My step mom didn’t say anything about it at first, but when my dad got home for work they both confronted me about the Instagram stories the clothes.
I said that the clothes were ugly af and I didn’t want to wear them. They both started yelling at me and telling me to take down the ig stories. My dad wants me to apologize and take back the clothes. I don’t want them, so I refused.
They started calling me ungrateful, and just generally losing it. My dad has taken the rest of my clothes from my room and is demanding that I take back the ugly clothes that my stepmom made, and apologize for making fun of her on IG.
I don’t think I should be forced to wear the clothes, nor do I think my stepmom has any business sticking her nose in my social media. My brother says that I should have just put the clothes in a donation box or something to avoid trouble, and that I messed up here. He thinks I was an asshole for being so direct. AITA for trying to get rid of these clothes in her face? ###### | YTA, I agree with your brother. If you hate a gift you don't blab about it for the world to see, you just say thank you to the gift giver and quietly get rid of the gift later. ###### |
My ex and I have split custody of our daughter, I get certain days of the week and he gets the others and we split through weekends.
This year, Father’s Day comes on a day that my daughter stays with me for the weekend up until the week, and I told her that she couldn’t go to his house on Father’s Day because of that and also because it would be too much of a hassle to get her from my house to his back to mine for just one day. My ex texted me today asking why the fuck can’t he just have this one day and I told him straight up. I don’t take any bullshit and I believe it’s only fair. If this happened to me I would let him take her for the day even though it was Mother’s Day. He called me heartless and now my mother is reprimanding me for this. I don’t believe I’m in the wrong because it’s only what the schedule says I can’t help that. AITA? ###### | YTA, he should be allowed to see his daughter on his day. Father’s day is a month away, work something out in your schedule to let him have the extra day then, and you take an extra day after or something ###### |
My son has a gaming pc that he built himself many years ago. He saved up for it himself and put it all together on his own. Fast forward to now, and I find out one of the parts he bought for his PC was faulty. This meant that they were giving out $30 to anyone who had bought one and could prove the purchase. I then applied for the payout and kept the money for myself. When I went into my sons room to tell him the news, he was pretty upset he wasn’t getting the money. He insisted he deserved it since he was the one who bought all the parts/put it together, but I explained to him it was just his birthday and I spent about $170 repairing your pc. Keep in mind, I’ve put lots of cash into repairing his computer over the years. AITA?
EDIT: some people are confused about the wording of the story, sorry about that. What I meant is he bought the parts for it, and I’ve paid for every repair/cleaning since then. ###### | YTA, he paid for the part, that $30 is therefore his. Are you really so immature you're going to steal from your son because it was his birthday recently and you spent money on him? ###### |
Sorry for the format, I’m on mobile.
So this happened a years ago, but it came up again and I wanted to know if I was wrong for how I responded.
So a little background, my family is big on their history, almost everything has been passed down through generations, including names. It’s been impressed upon each generation how “important” all of these pieces are. Furniture, jewelry, even the names. This brings us to the issue at hand, my great great grandmothers engagement ring.
I am the only girl in my generation and before my grandmother passed she said it would come to me and would only be given to me once I had graduated college. I was never allowed to see the ring, but everyone in the family would talk about it. The rarity of the cut the clarity of the diamond. I spent years dreaming of this ring, I was in high school when she died.
So when my graduation was coming up my parents had it appraised and insured. They called to tell me the price so I would understand the importance of it. This is where the issue might have occurred. They tell me the number and it was much lower than I had expected, under $10,000, which is expensive but I responded with “wait... that’s it?” They asked what I meant, and said “I thought it would have been worth way more”, they scoffed and said “Well! Sorry it wasn’t up to your taste queen!”
They got really angry and said I was an ungrateful child and had no sense of value. They “gave” me the ring for graduation in front of the family but then took it back for years saying since I didn’t appreciate it they would keep it. I have it now but not without a lecture of its value and how I still don’t appreciate it. I felt bad because it is a beautiful ring and I would never sell it, but I just felt so underwhelmed. AITA for what I said about the heirloom? ###### | YTA, family heirlooms are not just about how much they are worth, but the meaning that they have. Hence the term heirloom. ###### |
For some background. I am a F(17). My cousin just left high school. I don't like to talk to my aunts, uncles, cousins, or anyone in my family because i'm not a party person as them and like to keep to myself.
In this month of june. My cousin family wanted to throw a party during this time. I have a fitness watch for my fitness class I'm going to take in fall classes.
In the winter of 2019 cousin wanted to loss weight so she sign up for a gym but quit after a few months.
Knowing this. I wanted to gift her a fitness watch so she can track her running and over all fitness. I bought her a fitness watch with the basics (tracking her heart rate, tracking how much she run, walked, biked. Also could tell the time and date as well tell you when you are getting a call. No not an apple watch). I also got her a necklace that's says "class of 2020".
​
When the party came. We got cake and everything went well.
Then her mom said "It's time my angel opens her gifts"
My cousin open gifts and was happy about them. My aunts thanks the person for giving the gift.
​
THEN... was mine.
She open it and saw the watch
cousin "I like the watch and necklace OP."
Her mom looked at it closely and saw it was a fitness watch.
Anut: "HOW DARE YOU GIVE THIS GIFT TO HER?!?! OP!!!"
Me: "I thought she would like it."
cousin now seeing it's a fitness watch and the rest of my family as well.
Cousin: "really? OP just because i'm fat you give me this?"
Me: "No it's because --" i got cut off by my family saying i was horrible for giving her that gift. I felt bad i left the party. My aunt called my mom to say i was such an evil person.
​
So reddit am i the asshole?
(sorry for mispelling) ###### | YTA, even if it was unintentional.
Fitness items like this, gym memberships, etc... All of these are very bad gifts to give to people if they do not *explicitly* ask you for them, for exactly this reason. Most everyone is self conscious about their body, but most especially overweight people, and it’s really hard not to take a gift like that the wrong way. ###### |
I am living overseas in a place that has the pandemic under control and want to return to the States having been offered my dream job, which I have worked 15 years to get. The problem is is that I am not willing to take my two small children (1 year and 3 years) with me. I do not mind risking my own health to travel to the States and work but I feel that bringing my children would be impossible right now- I do not have family that can care for them and I do not want to put them in daycare given the current situation. Their father has offered to take care of them during the pandemic so that I can take this job.
The problem is is that I feel like a shit mother if I leave my children behind. I have concerns about how fit their father is to care for them both full time without me there. He is a bit of a man-child (sorry, I know I am going to get burned for this) in the sense that I have to make all the decisions and do all of the cleaning and care giving for the children. He is content to have them eat dry cereal all day, every day and his interactions with the kids involves having them watch him play video games. I feel that if I do leave, even if it is only going to be for six months, they will not be properly cared for. My husband and I are on the verge of divorce over his parenting and other things - so much so that I had me and my childrens' plane tickets purchased to return to the states before the pandemic broke out.
AITA if I leave my children with their father for a short time to pursue my dreams? ###### | YTA, especially when you describe how they will be treated by their other parent. You're saying it is okay to risk your health (up to and including death) and are willing to do so knowing the other parent doesn't put their best interest first, all the while YOU won't be putting their best interest first by leaving them.
At what point do you show your concern about your children? ###### |
I'm sure plenty of guys are laughing at me now or saying "I wish I had this problem!" but here goes.
Both my wife (33F) and I (36M) are working at home now. It gives us more closeness and I'm trying to count blessings especially as we have different schedules.
However my wife has seemed to taken the opportunity to...basically never wear clothes. She works in nothing but her glasses and is doing some chores and cleaning naked too. I recently saw her cleaning and vacuuming the living room fully naked and she's even doing some cooking naked. She's not getting dressed when she rarely leaves the house. I asked her why and she basically gave a very passive aggressive response of why does she need to bother with clothes if she's not leaving the house and only I'm around.
Yeah I know I'm an idiot for complaining and so many guys are jealous of me now. However I honestly just find it a bit too weird and unnerving, kind of distracting since I'm trying to work too and frankly a little self-centered since she's obviously doing it for her gratification and not mine. I knew she had some exhibitionist tendencies before we married (which I enjoyed!) but I'm also a bit worried if she's exploring them in "other" ways in her study's privacy. I don't think it's too much to ask for her to put on a tank top and shorts most of the time and maybe let it be a special surprise to me when the clothes come off. Once again I have no doubt she's doing this because she wants to expose herself, not to give me a show, hence why she's not taking the hint.
Am I being a dumbass upset at a great thing or unreasonable? ###### | YTA, especially for this line:
>[she's being] a little self-centered since she's obviously doing it for her gratification and not mine
Seriously, what the fuck? Her doing things for herself and not for you is being "self centered"? Is it "self centered" when she wears comfortable clothes? When she orders food that she wants at a restaurant? When she wears makeup that she thinks looks good? When she watches a movie that she wants to see instead of one that you want to see?
She just wants to be comfortable *in her own home*, and you're treating it like some sort of affront, and insinuating that, what, she's running a side gig as a camgirl or something? I mean, what else could you be implying by:
>I'm also a bit worried if she's exploring [her exhibitionist tendencies] in "other" ways in her study's privacy.
Get a grip, dude. Because you're coming off as a tad controlling, with what seems like a dash of kink-shaming to boot. ###### |
So, just to preface, my younger sisters (16&13 respectfully) eat all the 'normal' kinds of meat - sausages, bacon, steak, etc. However, my dad asked me to cook a stew and I'd never tried lamb's heart before (my dad has and absolutely enjoys it, so had no issue, but knew my sisters would refuse to even try it), so we told them it was normal steak. Anyway, after they'd eaten it and enjoyed it, I told them what they'd actually eaten and now my younger sister is refusing to talk to me. Am I the asshole?
It's healthier, leaner and tastes the same. Plus, my dad had no issue with it. ###### | YTA, don’t trick people into eating things. They’re not missing an essential aspect of life if they never try lamb’s heart. Even if they’re being excessively picky, it’s their problem, not yours. ###### |
One of my best friends is getting married next year, and I agreed to be in the wedding and have bought my bridesmaid dress already. I recently found out that my ex-boyfriend will also be in the wedding. As far as I know, we will not be walking down the aisle together, but who knows? I was a little apprehensive about being in the wedding with him (I’ll get to why in a moment), but, my friend said that I could bring my current boyfriend to the wedding with me, and that made me feel a lot better. Now, I am not normally one to get flustered around an ex-boyfriend, but, after we broke up (about two years ago), and I started dating other men, I realized that he had talked me into doing things I didn’t want to do (namely, sex) on multiple occasions. Yesterday, as I was talking to my current boyfriend, he realized that he would not be able to come because they are getting new software at work the month of the wedding, and no one is allowed to take time off during that month while the staff adjusts. (I should also mention that this wedding is out of state and on a Thursday.) My ex-boyfriend is extremely close with both the bride and groom and especially with the bride’s family, and he and her younger brother are best friends. WIBTA for telling my friend that I would not be comfortable even attending the wedding with my ex there as long as my current boyfriend cannot go? ###### | YTA, don't make her feel like she has to choose, just bow out. ###### |
AITA for reporting a girl to HR for harassment?
There’s this really fucking annoying girl in my office, Sarah, who is constantly pissing most of us off. She will brag about all the dudes she fucked off of tinder, how much of a fascist racist fat pig trump is and constantly reminding us how he sucks ( i don’t think Politics should be brought into the office ever, office politics are bad enough, we don’t need real life politics into it too). She also eats like a pig, making messes and doesn’t wipe her mouth off and its nasty af. Her fingers are greasy and she touches my office supplies to get shit (without asking) and leaving greases all over.
Most people report this shit but its too minor and hard to prove that the grease is from her and they just say wipe it off and get over it. One thing HR doesn’t tolerate though is sexual harassment.
She was being obnoxious as usual making jokes about vaginas or something from Amy Schumer’s stupid netflix series and I told her she was being obnoxious and to not do that when we are trying to work. I hit record on my phone and let it sitting at my desk so it can see and hear everything. She responded with “suck my dick and balls, Its break time.”
I immediately went to HR who said that they wouldn’t do anything until i brought up the employee code of conduct and showed them by her saying “suck my dick and balls” its clear sexual harassment and a threatening gesture as she put her hands by her genitals. They decided they had to fire her. A lot of her friends are pissed at me and saying this was unecessary. My wife says this was minor petty shit and that since she went into drugs and depression its my fault. I say fuck this shit and fuck her ###### | YTA, could this be anymore fake? Good job writing though ###### |
Throw away because my girlfriend is on Reddit and knows my account.
Yesterday, my girlfriend showed me a building she was building in Minecraft. I asked her if I can look around the place, and when she went to the bathroom, I found a lot of TNT in one of the chests and thought it would be funny to prank her by exploding the place.
When she came back and saw it, she got **extremely** upset, almost as upset as one would be if they got their real house burned down. She even cried, and she now won't talk to me.
I thought it was just a game and not worth getting that angry over. I think she's so invested in it to the point that she cares about her Minecraft cat more than actual people in her life. It was meant to be a prank, but she's turning it to big deal. ###### | YTA, complete disrespect for her interests. ###### |
My (30F) husband (35M) and I have been married for two years. He has this group of five friends that he has been friends with since his freshman year of college. They are all very close, they have a group chat where they talk to each other almost daily. There are two women in this group, and one of them is my husbands first girlfriend. They dated for two years.
I am uncomfortable with them speaking to each other, but this friend group is a major support system for my husband. He was pretty clear that he wasn’t going to give up the relationships.
Yesterday was ex-girlfriends birthday. She had a very difficult year dealing with some health issues, and they were all ready to celebrate with her over Zoom. We even got a little dressed up for it. They popped champagne. They each wanted to go around and say something nice or share a memory.
My husband started his off by saying how beautiful she was, and complementing her musical talent (I don’t have rhythm to save my life). When he finished I muted him and asked him to complement me as well. He ignored me and turned up his mic to keep talking to his friends. I asked him again, this time so that his friends heard.
He got embarrassed and told me to leave. I stood firm and told him he was being disrespectful. Then his friends started piping in about me ruining their fake party and calling me names. I told him to correct them, and he instead joined them in telling me to leave.
As I walked off, they started venting about me, so I unplugged the router. I took the router and cables to my girlfriends house where I currently am. I’m feeling horrible. My husband has been calling me and we get into screaming matches whenever I answer the phone. I’ve gotten texts from a couple of his friends calling me names. Although my friend assures me I’m in the right, I’m feeling guilt, and I’ve never seen my husband so angry. AITA for unplugging the router? ###### | YTA, but not just for unplugging the router. You're basically saying
a. You're jealous your husband has friends that aren't your friends
b. You're insecure because your husband is still on friendly terms with an ex and cares about how she's doing (omg, what a human thing to do!)
c. You're insecure because instead of also trying to celebrate you decide you need affirmation too and demand that it be provided to you
d. You have anger issues as a result of not having your ego stroked sufficiently and immediately
e. You're completely incapable of having a rational conversation. Let me guess who starts the screaming matches. ###### |
My girlfriend (21f) and I (20m) have been together about 6 months now. I met her at university but live about three hours away in a really small town. She was visiting at the time lockdown happened, so has been staying with my family and I. It’s been great and my family love her.
With restrictions being eased, my home friends decided to have a socially distanced catch up by a lake behind my friends house. They told me to bring my girlfriend so they could meet her for the first time. We get there and it’s great catching up with them, they’re loving my girlfriend and we’re a bit drunk. We decide to go on a bit of a walk by the lake and for a laugh I decide to push my girlfriend in. The lake isn’t deep at all so the fact she can’t swim isn’t even something I thought about. She struggled a bit before getting out. She seemed unbothered and laughed, until we got home.
My mom picked us up as it’s a half an hour drive and we were both drunk. She hardly said a word to me in the car so when we got back to the house I asked her what was going on. She started crying and asked why I tried to embarrass her like that. I was confused and told her it was just a joke and she got pissed off and decided to sleep in the spare room. AITA? ###### | YTA, but not for why you think. Your girlfriend probably wanted to make a good impression on your friends, and no body likes being made a fool of. I would even go so far as to say that she was very kind to not mention anything in front of your friends and start a fight.
I’m sure you may not have even thought it was embarrassing either! But if she didn’t know very many people on the trip then it kinda isolates her. ###### |
Throwaway due to friend following my account
So me (F30) and my boyfriend (M32) have found out we’re expecting our first baby. We couldn’t wait to tell everyone, but waiting until the 12 week mark to tell our friends and family.
So we hit the 12 week mark with zero problems. We tell our parents who are absolutely ecstatic and I decide to tell my 3 friends via zoom call on Friday night. I call them and we’re chatting so I decide to tell them my news. All three of them look incredibly happy for me and while two of my friends were asking me questions one of my friends (we’ll call her beth) suddenly shut off her camera.
My friends and I kept chatting and I just brushed it off that she went to the toilet or something. But when she came back, she was sniffing and looked like she had been crying. One of my friends asked her if she was ok and she said she was. Suddenly all of them were asking Beth if she was alright, even though she was insisting she was fine.
To be honest, I was getting annoyed with her because of it. She has been struggling with fertility issues since she was 19 (now 30) and it was like she was making my news all about her. It felt like she was stealing my thunder, so I said to her “Look I get you’ve had fertility issues Beth but you don’t have to make everything about you”
She then logged off and my friends said i was being an asshole because I should be more sensitive to her needs. Frankly I think she should be more sensitive to mine as I’m the one who’s pregnant and who’s going through a life changing experience, not her.
It’s been a few days and Beth still hasn’t called to apologise, but my friends think I should. AITA? ###### | YTA, but not for the reason in the title. You have the right to tell your friends, and she has the right to cry, but what you said basically amounted to “hey, I recognize that you have struggled with something for more than a decade now, but I really couldn’t give two shits about your problems” she wasn’t trying to make it about her, if she was she wouldn’t have shit the camera off and would have instead done it all on camera.
Edit: HOLD UP. You got mad at someone crying over being upset because they had TWO LOSSES?? Someone correct me if I’m wrong, but two losses sounds like two miscarriages to me, and you would have known this. You’re wayyyyyyyyy TA here. And on top of that your apology was extremely backhanded. You don’t apologize and say “you still shouldn’t have gotten upset, but here’s an apology I guess” ###### |
My (f30) brother (40) met his wife (38) in college, they got married 10 years ago and now have two kids (f8 and m6). I never liked her much because I’ve always felt she’s just with him for his money, and I’ll explain why. They both finished their degrees but she never got a job out of it, he did. He earns a good salary but she has never worked to contribute to their household. Then they had kids and she would use the kids as an excuse to why she couldn’t work, which is whatever, but my niece and newphew are in school now and all she does during the day is go to yoga with her friends, and get her nails and face done. Me, on the other hand I’m a single mother of a 3 year old and work as well.
The other day we were on a family zoom call and brothers wife said “I’m so stressed right now” or something like that and it annoyed me so I said “I’m working and have a child to look after on my own what do you have to be stressed about?” Everyone went silent and my brother ended his call on the end. My Mom and Dad told me I was out of line but I explained that she is using my brother for his money so she can sit there and look pretty, they said they some what agree but it isn’t their business, well he is my brother and I care about him.
My brother sent me a text saying that until I apologise he doesn’t want me to around him, his wife or their kids.
I don’t see why I have to apologise just because I told it how it is.
AITA? ###### | YTA, but I'll address the "you were out of line" issue. I think there is a question of etiquette here. The rules about what people should say when aren't just about what's true and how people feel, but what impact the rules themselves have on conversations. For example, why do many people have rules against discussing religion? Religion is important to people, questions of how the world is can be genuinely interesting to discuss... Why not discuss it? The answer is that religion is one of those subjects where people have very strong feelings, that tie into their identity and self-concept as good people, and where it is very hard for people who disagree to come to an agreement. So any conversation about religion risks invoking strong feelings, making people feel attacked to their deepest selves, with no resolution. Which means that if you have a conversation and religion is OK to be brought up, you need to be on your guard for the conversation turning contentious. But sometimes you don't want to have to be on your guard, you don't want to have to argue with people you otherwise like and get along with, you don't want to risk things getting so contentious that it risks the relationship; you want to stack the deck in favor of the conversation being positive and comfortable and relationship-building instead of -destroying. So you make a rule that you won't discuss religion.
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In this case by attacking your SIL over her "I'm so stressed" comment you were making a rule in family conversations that if you comment on your difficulties, you might be attacked for it. That's not something most people want in conversations with their loved ones, and that's why there's usually a default setting of being supportive to people sharing their difficulties, even if you personally have negative thoughts about them. And this goes further, because I think you would generally agree with this default setting. I think you broke this rule with your SIL specifically because you don't acknowledge her as part of the family, as a "loved one" who is entitled to the comfort and freedom of being able to vent around you. And I think that's something you have to examine, and that's where your parents being "we kind of agree but you were out of line" goes, because you are clearly the only one who sees your SIL like that. Your brother sees her as his wife and loved one. Your parents have concerns about her, but accept her as your brother's wife and as deserving of consideration as a family member. So you really have a choice of getting with the program, which will help maintain a good relationship with your brother and the rest of the family, or continuing to dissent with the family consensus on what the family is, which might not end up in a way you like. Because it sure doesn't sound like your brother is leaving her any time soon.
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ETA: aww, you guys like me! :) (that's right, "me", not "this comment", I know you are all validating me personally and I love you for it and will not hear otherwise) <3 to you all \^\^ ###### |
So I was out working in the yard for about 2-hours and I come in for a quick break from the son and catch my breath. As I walk in, my wife and kid wake up from their nap. I take him out of his play pen and shortly after my wife notices he has a dirty diaper. She proceeds to tell my son to come to me so that I can change his diaper. He never crawled to me and I just stayed on the couch relaxing. His diaper didn't get changed.
30-minutes later I see a scowl on my wife's face. I ask her why she is upset. Turns out, she was upset that I didn't change his diaper. AITA for not jumping up to change his diaper? ###### | YTA, buddy. You let your kid sit in his own filth because he didn't crawl to you on command? It takes literally 2 min max to change one diaper. You took more time typing this up than that, I'd wager. Even if you needed to catch your breath, you could still change him after a few minutes and a drink.
You're supposed to be the grown up here, but it sounds like your wife has two babies on her hands. ###### |
Happened earlier today. I decided to go for my evening run that I have been conducting everyday for the past couple weeks. On the route I take, there is a particular house that is a little bit worn down and has a small dog that does ape shit crazy every time someone walks by the house. The house is fenced off and the fence comes up to my waist. The small dog has been barking at me for the past three weeks, every time I run past the house. As I was jogging past the house this evening, like clockwork the little shit started barking up a storm. I decided this time around that I was gonna show this little dog who the alpha male was so that it would stop ruining my evening runs. As it was barking at me, I made I contact with the dog, went straight up to the fence and started barking at the dog. The dog got scared and ran into it’s dog house. Just as I thought I had solved my dog problem the owner comes out from behind a bush with gardening gloves on and starts berating me for scaring her dog. I told the lady that she is a shitty dog parent and that if she did a better job socializing her dog it wouldn’t be such a menace to the passerby’s. She freaked out and told me to f*ck off. AITA for barking at the dog? ###### | YTA, because its not the dogs fault if it's not been socialised properly and barks a lot, it could just be doing it out of anxiety in the first place and you've now scared it more. Also the woman probably witnessed a grown adult barking at her small dog and thought you were insane.
I have a dog that barks at every passerby and if someone did this, which would definitely scare him, and then blamed me for not socialising him I'd probably tell you to fuck off too. My dog has a lot of behavioural and emotional issues due to abuse and neglect by previous owners, so not great to assume this woman is to blame and scare her dog, cos you don't actually know the situation. ###### |
The wording in the title is exactly how my 14 year old daughter phrased it, not necessarily my opinion. So I've been married to Lacey for 18 years. We have a great marriage and two daughters. The 16 year old isn't relevant in this and we'll call the 14 year old Madison. Madison and Lacey have been clashing a lot lately and that's what inspired this post.
So I absolutely love my wife, but she is ridiculous, and vain, and still my favorite person in the world. Lacey cares excessively about appearance and dresses very feminine. She has a hard time with the fact Madison is developing her own style, and she can get controlling. For example they had a big fight over an "ugly" pair of Vans, though Lacey did buy them in the end.
Well I came home from work the other day and Lacey and Madison were fighting, because Madison cut and dyed her own hair. Now I think it looks ridiculous. She gave herself fucked up bangs and there is a red streak, but at the end of the day Lacey doesn't have to go out looking like that. Well Lacey started crying and Madison said she doesn't want to be a "vapid, trophy wife, Barbie" like her mom. I grounded her for that, but said that I'm on her side with the hair.
I'm the biggest pushover with Lacey though. She kept crying about how the kids don't appreciate her and she doesn't know who Madison is anymore, and when Lacey gets upset she gets hysterical. Well I told the girls they can fix their own dinner (there are plenty of leftovers, Lacey cooks every day) and I hung out in the bedroom with Lacey, gave her like an hour long foot massage and helped her relax. Madison told me this morning that she thinks I coddle her mom and she blames me for the situation as well. So am i an asshole for trying to be a good husband? ###### | YTA, based on the post and the follow-up comments your wife is manipulative af and you are a complete enabler. Your wife is an adult and the world does not revolve around her yet she acts like a toddler crying to get her way and you give in. The message you are sending your daughters is that you care about your wife, even when she is in the wrong, over them every time, and they can't count on you. And you are also showing them an unhealthy relationship dynamic. Would you be happy if they ended in a relationship if they are playing the part of yours? Someone who constantly caves in and manages their partner's feelings? Or if they were your spouse? The kind of person who manipulates their partner? Because this is the only relationship dynamic that has been model to them. ###### |
I work in an office job (currently WFH now but still applicable). I am frequently bombarded with nonsensical and vague requests with unrealistic deadlines. I am in a customer-service type role, although the 'customers' are people from work, so I'm not dealing with the general public.
I finally got sick of the constant requests and put this as an auto-responder on my Outlook:
"Before you email me, consider these four things:
- Your deadline is not my priority
- Be specific in your request. I will not fill in the gaps or join the dots for you.
- Read my job description. Requests unrelated to my job description will be sent straight to my junk folder.
- Politeness doesn't cost a penny.
My supervisor gave me a call yesterday saying I need to remove this auto-responder or tone it down. I stood my ground and said I'm getting sick at the quality of requests coming through and needed to filter some of them out. I've been referred to my supervisor's boss. AITA? ###### | YTA, as you said “being polite doesn’t cost a penny” and the wording of this email is anything but that ###### |
So I just woke up, went into the bedroom, and it’s a disaster. Parts of shoe everywhere on the floor. I gasp.
Last night we were playing scrabble like good little quarantinee’s and he walked into the room gently holding her shoelace in his mouth, shoe trailing behind. I told him no, drop it, and he dropped it. I said “looks like he found a new toy” and she was annoyed, said something about how he “better not do anything” and then we continued our night. She left the shoe there. Admittedly, I didn’t move it either, but my shoes are always put in our mud closet next to the front door.
She wore these shoes 2 days ago and they’ve been laying in the hallway ever since.
She woke up and is now super angry at our dog (he turned 1 this past week). Mentioning about how we’ll have to get rid of him ( she doesn’t mean this, she always says harsh things when situations get rough). Throughout her discovering the shoe I mostly remained quiet because I knew that I believed the shoe shouldn’t have been left laying around.
Am I the asshole for taking my dogs side?
Is she the asshole for being mad at our puppy for chewing her shoe?
Is the dog the asshole for chewing a toy(shoe) in the night? ###### | YTA, as dogs shouldn't be chewing on anything but their food or their chew toys. You're rewarding bad behavior. Your girlfriend shouldn't have to plan her decisions around a badly trained dog. Stop making excuses for destructive dogs; this is unwanted behavior that should be punished. ###### |
I'll tried to keep it short. I'm (30M) a gamer and have been for a long time. I've been with my gf (30F) for 6 years and i got her into gaming a few years ago.
We dont often play together as we are into different games however I convinced her to play a popular first person shooting game that we could play campaign co-op.
We play, we finish the game, i get the last 3 achievemnts on steam to pop up for completing the game and she didnt. All other ahcievemrnts popped at rhe same time? Just not these end game ones for her.
She is pissed. She is an achievement hunter. She says part of the enjoyment of playing games on steam is popping the acheivements. She has spent hours doing this for other games to try and complete them.
I tell her that the acheivements are absolutely pointless, it brings no benefits to game play and that they are worth nothing. She told me to not put down the way she plays and that i was making her feel like shit which i dont think i was.
Now she isnt really speaking to me and isnt putting much effort into playing with me anymore. AiTA? ###### | YTA, as a fellow achievement hunter... it definitely adds to the game!! Wth, the game pushes you to to find different ways to complete the main campaign that adds to your skill and sometimes the storyline. Those achievements means you’ve completed everything that game has to offer in its experience and if you don’t get those achievements you’re missing out on it. I NEVER say I finished a game unless that includes, for me trophies, because only then can I say I can’t do anymore therefore done. Also it literally gives you the sense of achievement.
Don’t tell someone else how to play.... because no ones going to want to play with you. ###### |
My parents (46M, 44F) split up when I (19M) was only 2 and shortly after my dad became a fetish vid producer.
My parents had split custody of me but honestly I fucking hated my dad's career choice. He was in femdom fetish videos and although no sex was involved, I was mercilessly bullied for several years once people found a video of my dad.
At the end of last year I told him how I really feel, that I fucking despise him for being such a pathetic weak ass bitch and embarrassing himself on videos like that for so many years. He was very upset when i said that and i told him i fucking hate the fetish models he works with and i want nothing to do with them (he kept trying to set me up with them).
I told him he's a fucking embarrassment and I like my mom more and he started crying and I told him I want nothing to do with him, and that I wish I had a different dad then he started crying saying hes sorry. Then when I told one of the fetish models what I said (she asked me why hes so upset when I saw her at a store) and I told her and she said I'm an AH but I'm so glad I finally put him in his place but idk if I was bad.
Since then he message me every day but I ignore his messages.
AITA? ###### | YTA, and so pathetically insecure. I wish you could understand how you're showing yourself to be pathetic and weak, not your father. He is secure enough to admit what he likes - and even get paid to do it. Your ego is the sensitive one. ###### |
When I was in high school my ex and I had a baby right before graduation. We broke up before the baby was even born and then I moved away for college. I didn't get to see the baby much when she was little but my parents would check up on them and write checks sometimes if they needed money. I would go visit Gabriela sometimes when coming back from college but me and her mom didn't get along so we just kinda fell out of touch.
A couple years after college I was living in San Diego and met a girl and got married. My wife and I moved back to Arizona and settled down: job/house/kids. We had three kids, a boy and two girls.
I reached out to Gabriela when we moved back to Arizona and her mom wasn't happy about it but I got to see Gabriela. I would bring her over about once a month to hang out with the other kids or just on a lunch date. Things got more difficult when she was a teenager and was mad at me sometimes but got better as she got older. We're good now, she's a good kid.
Gabriela is getting married next year and asked me to walk her down the aisle. But my other two daughters and wife are against it. My wife is real old school and said it would hurt her to see me walking another woman's daughter down the aisle. She's real traditional on stuff like this and said it would make it less special for our two daughters when their day comes. My other two daughters aren't close to Gaby and didn't really care at first but I think my wife turned them against it. They said they don't wanna share me with Gaby but she's their sister too
I don't wanna cause any type of issues plus I know Gaby's mom wants to walk her down the aisle. I told this to Gaby and she got really sad and cried and said she wanted me to change my mind but I gotta think about my wife and other daughters too. What do I do? ###### | YTA, and so is your wife - but its obvious you have not put your foot down that Gaby is ***your daughter***, not "another woman's daughter" before now. You clearly care more for not rocking the boat with your wife than you do about Gaby. YTA. Congratulations. ###### |
I've (40M) got 3 children from a previous marriage 11,10,8 and we have two together 3 and 1.
I've been with my wife (31F) for 6 years now.
Usually during her "time of the month" she spends 4 out of 7 days in bed because, I'm going off what she says, they're so painful it leaves her unable to do anything even with painkillers - she doesnt always take painkillers and tries to get through the pain as she puts it.
We had begun to think she was pregnant since despite being frequent she hadnt had her time of the month for 2 months after her last one being 10 days, she was considering going to the doctors but has decided it isnt an emergency.
She promised the children as soon as the paddling pool arrived, on the day we would put it up and she would spend all day outside with ALL of the children since we have been busy.
Paddling pool arrived today and so did her time of the month early last night.
As usual shes in bed.
Children have been begging to play outside, with her.
I asked her if she wanted painkillers and when she is getting up, she said she didnt and isnt.
Day progressed and children got more and more whiny and she refused to deal with it while I was in a meeting.
I may have snapped when I got a small break, I told her to either explain or take a painkiller and stop feeling so d-mn sorry for herself.
She got all teary eyed and basically screamed at me that I'm an insensitive ass, got up and played with them for the day (extremely annoyed and snappy though, not towards the children)
I was working otherwise I wouldve played with the children.
AITA? ###### | YTA, and here is why:
> Usually during her "time of the month" she spends 4 out of 7 days in bed because, I'm going off what she says, they're so painful it leaves her unable to do anything
1) Just say period. Nothing bad will happen if you do. 2) Of course you have to go off of what she says, it is her pain not yours.
Anyway, this is established; you know that she has debilitating pain while on her period. She didn't choose this pain, but she has to put up with it. Most people who love their partners would try to understand that and do whatever they could to make their partner's life easier.
> She promised the children as soon as the paddling pool arrived, on the day we would put it up and she would spend all day outside with ALL of the children since we have been busy.
> Paddling pool arrived today and so did her time of the month early last night.
Well as soon as it arrived early you should have realised she would likely have ended up bedridden again.
> Children have been begging to play outside, with her.
This would have been a great time to explain that mummy doesn't feel well, and to teach your kids patience and compassion (at the very least your older ones should understand that sometimes people feel unwell).
> I asked her if she wanted painkillers and when she is getting up, she said she didnt and isnt.
This is in keeping with prior form, not certain why you'd be surprised.
> Day progressed and children got more and more whiny and she refused to deal with it while I was in a meeting.
This is where I have one iota of sympathy for you; obviously you had work constraints and trying to manage children while your partner is unwell is difficult. But there are plenty of people working from home and tending to their children right now; your situation is far from unique.
> I may have snapped when I got a small break, I told her to either explain or take a painkiller and stop feeling so d-mn sorry for herself.
You "may" have snapped? Son, experience on this sub tells me that when someone concedes a small amount of misbehaviour, it means they probably did something way worse. Why couldn't you explain to your kids that she was ill? Like I suggested previously? And she has every right to feel sorry for herself, **she's in debilitating pain**. *You* should feel sorry for her too.
> She got all teary eyed and basically screamed at me that I'm an insensitive ass, got up and played with them for the day (extremely annoyed and snappy though, not towards the children)
Yeah, she called it. You're an ass. And an asshole. And I fully support her being annoyed and snappy with you. It says a lot about her though (in a good way) that she was still good with the children despite being in pain. ###### |
Me(25f) and my bf(27m) live together.
Lately he's been watching this anime show called re: zero. At first I was curious to see what it was about but I find out that his favorite characters are extremely sexualized maids.
I ask why he's watching a show that has characters like that. He says that I have no right to dictate what he watches. AITA ###### | YTA, and he's right....re-evaluate your relationship if you're too uncomfy with this. ###### |
My daughter Savannah is 17. Last week she was at one of her friend's house. Basically her friends parents came home early from a business trip and busted their kid and my daughter drinking.
I was obviously pretty pissed and told Savannah that she can't go to Lily's house anymore. She basically told me that Lily is not the problem and that all of her friends occasionally drink. So I told her that while she lives under my roof that she cannot visit anyone. Am I being too harsh? ###### | YTA, all this is going to do is teach her how to lie and get her into worse situations than just drinking at her friends house. Talk to her about the dangers of alcohol but don’t stunt her social growth
Edit: spelling ###### |
So long story short during the quarantine I've been trying pretty hard to keep active and fit. I've been pretty successful at that and honestly I've been in the best shape of my life.
Anyways while I was talking to my friend to see how she was coping with being stuck in doors the topic of fitness comes up and she starts complaining about how much weight she's gained and beating herself up for being fat.
Now by her own admission she does no exercise and only eats trash. So I start saying it's not that hard to lose some weight just do some regular exercise and eat something healthy. Then she says there's not too much joy these days and food makes her happy. I tell her then of that's the case then just love your body the way it is and then she says she can't help hating her weight gain because of something to do with childhood trauma.
I then say to her "look I really hate self-pity. it's so jarring.
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't or won't change it, learn to live with it. How does beating yourself up for a situation you put yourself in help anyone?"
Then she says thanks for your opinion asshole and hangs up. My sister heard what I said and she said although she agrees I could have phrased it nicer.
To be fair I was already pretty irritable before that conversation so I might have been a bit harsh with the way I said it but I stand by what I said. I'm not really interested in being sympathetic to someone who generated a problem for themselves and refuses to do anything to fix it. So Reddit AITA? ###### | YTA, absolutely. Instead of just listening, you rapid-fired a bunch of advice and and then told her you "hate self-pity." That demonstrates spectacularly low emotional intelligence. It's also just really unkind. ###### |
Me (20f) and my sister (22f) fought yesterday and im not sure if im in the wrong here.
So my sister is already working in another city, but since the lockdown happened she decided to stay here with the family. She recently broke up with her boyfriend of 7 years because she found out he is cheating on her. We all comforted her and stuff. Its been a week now and she has become a very shitty person.
She doesnt have her own room in our house anymore because we turned her old room into an office. I offered my room because i do have a big bed. But she chose to sleep in my mom's tiny bed. (My mom sleeps alone in her tiny bed).
My mom woke me up last night to ask me if she can sleep in my room, i said yes of course. She said she's so sleepy for hours but my sister wont get up in her bed because she's too "depressed"
This morning i was in the shower while my mom slept on my bed, when i got out of the shower my sister is beside her and just moping around while she's trying to sleep. I know my mom is exhausted and just needed a few hours to rest. I became very annoyed at my sister and told her "get the fuck out of my room, you already took mom's bed, why are you here". She cried, left, and slammed the door. My mom woke up and is now doing chores. Im now more upset because she has woken up our mom and i know she just wanted to rest for a few hours.
Me and my mom have been avoiding her for days now because like i said, she has been very annoying lately.
I know its very difficult to break up with someone you loved for seven whole years. But do you really have to be a very crappy person??? We were supportive of her but now nobody in this house talks to her except my brother. Am i the asshole here???? ###### | YTA, a 7 year relationship is a large thing to mourn and its not going to be simply wrapped up with a weeks time and a bit of consoling. I dont see where your sister did anything intentionally wrong or mean. I believe your sister is seeking this closeness with family and specifically your mom for comfort and couldn't see how her neediness was wearing out your mother. You could have pulled her aside and pointed it out to her. Instead you moved immediately to being mean and yelling at her, essentially kicking her when she's already down.
Had you given warning or attempted to reason with her this could be n a h but you didn't give her a chance. ###### |
Just finished up my second year of college and it fucking sucked. I really don't wanna listen to professors tell me what to do all day and I don't wanna work some stupid job where some middle-aged dude with a beer belly bosses me around all day either. I fucking hate school and I fucking love music, so I decided to dropout of college and quit my job bussing tables to pursue a career as a music artist. I've spent the passed month grinding and learning about dubstep, psytrance, hip hop, and riddim production.
I told my mom about this and she wasn't supportive at all. "The odds are one in a million", "stay in school and work towards an actual career", etc. eventually just straight up said she's not gonna pay for my rent or my car payment anymore since I'm not working towards a "realistic financial goal" in here eyes. Buncha bullshit if you ask me. I don't think Skrillex and Lil Uzi Vert were worried about "realistic financial goals" and imma be on that level soon so I'm not even stressing tbh. If a mother can't support her son's dreams then she can fuck right off. I feel like she's giving me shit since she doesn't beleive in me but she'll be begging for some fame once I make it and I ain't gonna give it to her, so I decided to block her number to make that clear. I felt like its the right thing to do since I can't have that bs negativity in my life but my friends are tellin me I took it too far. Am I really an asshole for chasing my dreams? Or is my mom the asshole for shitting on them? Honest question ###### | YTA-you want to make adult decisions, then you should support yourself as an adult and pay your own bills. Definitely do not go crawling back to your mother of the fame and fortune never happens. ###### |
My son (15M) turned in a Spanish assignment one day late. His teacher emailed him saying that she wouldn’t accept the assignment. He emailed her back saying that the school policy during remote learning was that any missing assignment is put in as a 50% and it can be turned in in the next five days for full credit. She emailed saying that she wouldn’t accept it still. He then emailed her back and said “Eres una cara de tortilla” which means “You are a tortilla face”. She got really mad because he used the informal pronoun of you (tú) instead of the formal version (usted) and because of the insult. I told my son that this was funny only because she wasn’t following the school rules and it wasn’t even a bad insult or anything. My wife thinks I was reinforcing my son’s bad behavior. I think he was doing the right thing and standing up for himself. AITA? ###### | YTA-teach your kid to use his actual words instead of insults. If this teacher is flouting the rules, then you need to go over her head to the principal. ###### |
On my way to bed, I realized I had to send an important email before tomorrow.
While I was writing this email, my wife asked me if the parent of our kid's friend's full name was [redacted]. I told her I didn't know. Then she wanted to know what autodeposit on electronic funds transfer was. I told her it was pretty much what it sounds like. Then she asked whether that meant [redacted] had an account at the same bank as her. I told her I had no idea. At this point I'd completely lost my train of thought with the email, so when she asked me why someone would get autodeposit, I snapped at her and said "what are you trying to do?" She said she was sending [redacted] some money we owed her for some kid-related activity.
I put down my laptop and walked over to her quickly and said something along the lines of "let me see that", looked at her screen was like "if this is the email address you have for [redatcted], then it's probably going to transfer money to [redacted], but if you don't think the name is right, then don't do it." I was very curt with her and stomped back over to my laptop and tried to get back to my email.
Now I feel like an asshole because she told me I hurt her feelings and went off to bed. I could have told her I was in the middle of something. She also could have been a lot more explicit about what she was trying to figure out, instead of interrupting me every few minutes for 10 minutes.
Shit. Pretty sure AITA after reading this. ###### | YTA- Youve answered your own question. It could have been handled better ###### |
I've been married for two years and for the most part I'd say we have a great marriage. My wife has had some conflict with my family, and in the past I've always taken her side. My parents are both Persian and they were not happy when I married outside the race, but they have not said anything directly offensive. I guess this all happened two years ago but it is just coming to light.
So my parents had an arranged marriage, but most people are surprised to learn that because they did fall genuinely in love. I guess when I was engaged my mom told my wife about her arranged marriage. My wife asked my mom some questions about how it worked and my mom convinced my wife that her father sold her to my father for $300. This objectively makes no sense because my grandfather is pretty well off, so why $300? She gave her a fake story about how my dad would come over and inspect her and her sisters like horses. My wife didn't say anything because she thought it was a secret, but I guess she felt bad for my mom.
Now my sister recently got engaged. The man is Persian but it was not an arranged married. My mom said to my wife, I guess the prices went up because she sold for $5,000. Again this objectively doesn't make much sense because my dad owns a successful business and $5,000 isn't a big deal to him. My wife got very upset and told my dad that he is a pig (he was in on it) and told my sister we would help her get away. My mom admitted it was a joke and now my wife feels like an idiot.
I think it was a bitchy thing to do, but I can't believe that my wife fell for it. She wants me to go to war with my family, but I think it just needs to die a natural death. I did tell her i was surprised that she was so gullible, and now she is upset with me. ###### | YTA- you're wife (even IF she was gullible) was put in that position by your mother and felt stupid because of what she did. It was completely unnecessary and petty, and If you always take your wife's side why would you NOT in a situation like this? ###### |
My brother and his GF have been dating for two years now and are both 18. His GF came around for lunch and they were talking about a movie that they watched. While we were all talking, they said that they love eachother deeply.
I asked them a question that was in my mind for a while now about how they are they together without being physically attractived. At first, they seem normal but then they got mad. After I told them that in my opinion, they just seem like best mates. My mum got angry at me and told me to go to my room while my dad didn't do anything (he also believes the same thing). My brother and his girl left the house as they got pissed
My mum made me apologise to them for what I said. My dad didn't say anything but my mum and the rest got angry at me. AITA? ###### | YTA- you sound bitter as hell. ###### |
So my girlfriend is a full time digital artist. Well like any job sometimes she needs to let out her frustrations sometimes. I usually listen to her vent But this time I felt like she was the one wrong. Today she was really upset because someone commissioned her and didn’t disclose that the commission was to be used in their business. Basically what happened, she found them selling the design (a character) on tons of merchandise, shirts, etc. and she said if she knew she would’ve charged them a premium. I was taken aback by this. She always seemed down to earth, not greedy. Yet now she is here trying to squeeze as much money as possible out of someone simply trying to run a business.. I was like isn’t that kind of greedy? The person already paid nearly $100 for the artwork. They paid for it. It’s theirs. she told me that’s not how it works and it’s “different” when you’re getting something for yourself and for your business. I honestly don’t see her point, you can’t seriously tell me this isn’t greedy behavior. I told her they paid for it and she has no rights to tell them what to do with it. She claims she does have rights because they signed agreement to her terms (AKA a google form, not an actual legal form...) which apparently outlines this whole thing. Either way that doesn’t suddenly make this okay. If she goes after this person she’s going to ruin their business for no other reason than being greedy. Yet she continues to argue with me and I’m sitting here learning a whole new money driven side of my girlfriend. I know this shouldn’t affect our relationship, but the women I fell in love with would never do this. Yet here we are arguing and her refusing to back down and admit she’s acting like a big greedy business. AITA? ###### | YTA- you need to learn about how art is priced. They paid $100 for personal use of the art but didn’t disclose it would be used commercially. Personal use and commercial use are two different things. Your girlfriend is trying not to get scammed and here you are trying to act like a fainting maiden. ###### |
I moved in with my significant other of 2 years after my pay was reduced in February due to everything that’s been happening and it didn’t make financial sense for me to live in my own apartment anymore. My SO asked me to move in with him so I took up his offer. My SO is my ex-bf’s dad, and I’m now living in the home where my ex-bf grew up.
My ex doesn’t visit the house at all. I suggested to my SO that we should move everything out of my ex’s childhood room, let me use it to store some of my stuff, and let me use it as my personal office/lounging room. My SO agreed. So I boxed up everything in my ex-bf’s childhood room and moved them to the garage, including the furniture.
I’ve redecorated the room and made it mine. Before I even moved his things, I emailed my ex about this and told him he should come by and take a look at what he wants to keep and/or sell and/or donate. After not hearing from him for three weeks, today he texts me calling me all sorts of names for clearing out and taking “his” room.
I’m really trying to be sensitive and nice here, but he is making this very difficult with his rage-filled outbursts and texts. My SO and I are giving him a year to clear out his childhood stuff from the garage before I donate everything. Neither my SO nor I feel clearing out his room was inappropriate, but my ex is just melting down in an tantrum-filled rage. Why does my ex feel like he owns his childhood room when he doesn’t even visit? It is very sad and bizarre. ###### | YTA- you are banging his dad, moving Into his childhood house, and clearing his room out and donating anything he can’t fit in his place. This almost has to be a troll with the amounts of time deafness
Edit: I love the “ I’m being so patient with him” line! Damn this post is a train wreck ###### |
Was checking out at the self-checkout. Realized I had two extra frozen meals that I did not need. Crazy time right now - just wanted to get out quickly so I set them on top of the candy rack in front of me.
Store manager confronts me. She says “are you planning on putting that back”? Like for fucks sake, am I back in school? Is this not what she has paid employees for? I said “I’m in a hurry, sorry” and bolted. ###### | YTA- They're frozen, theyll go to waste if not. ###### |
A friend of mine started dating this girl, they are long distance. Now I love my friend he is a super talented engineer but he is a bit socially stupid. He hasn't dated any girls before and now started dating a girl that is nothing but red flags. She is a single mom and the way she describes her life as if she is a perpetual victim. To add to that all of her ex's been large tattoed men and now she is dating my engineering buddy when he met her at a conference.
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Again I told my friend to be mindful just because this is his first relationship and he is pretty experienced... But now he told me that she has been online shopping a lot on his credit card (she has his amazon account). But then he told me she spent $50 at CVS...
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I told him the only reason people spend that type of money at a pharmacy is to buy Plan B... (this was 6 days ago) and he hasn't seen her since January...He told me how dare I accuse his girlfriend of cheating. I told him to ask in our guys groupchat.. He asked and everyone called him an idiot. Now he is mad because he thinks I told our friends before hand. I am like no, if someone spends $50 at a pharmacy its 99% for that reason. ###### | YTA- There’s a lot of negative stereotyping about this girl in your post. Slamming her for being a single mom, claiming she’s cheating just because your friend and her are in a long distance relationship, spending money with his cards (which I’m assuming he gave to her willingly) and criticizing her past relationships... lots of negative stereotyping and blaming her for her past. You said that they met at a CONFERENCE which implies that she’s established or something but quickly dismiss it to illustrate her as TA.
Have you actually talked to your friend about his relationship with his girlfriend? Have you actually asked HIM how HE feels on HIS relationship versus YOUR own bias? Maybe you should actually talk to your friend instead of talk for him. Asking him why he gave her his card info and ask him if he’s actually happy. YTA because you want to place all responsibility on his girlfriend and draw her out to be TA when it seems like the only thing you actually care about is being right about this girl being the TA instead of actually being a friend. ###### |
Some time last year there was a Halloween party for the entire grade 10. Everyone was invited and every kid showed up. This is my first "real" party (alcohol and over 10 people) I've ever been to and I am extremely excited.
So I get to the party, drink some beer, drink some more cause I wasn't feeling drunk (never had alchohol before). Anyways, you proabably see were this is going by now. I get hella drunk, can barely walk, room is spinning, can't focus. I'm kinda scared cause this is all so new to me. Anyways, I start poking people and flirting with everyone, pretty much being a jerk. The guy who's house the party is at kicks me out and calls my dad. My dad is chill but still kinda pissed that I got that drunk. I haven't been invited to another party since.
So, AITA for getting drunk at my first party and acting like an idiot? Personally I see there point but it hurts knowing that there are party's every 2 weeks and I am not invited to any of them because I acted dumb my first time getting drunk. ###### | YTA- The expectation with parties that serve alcohol is you drink to enjoy and socialize, not get super drunk and act like an idiot. Also, you were harassing people; using the "I was drunk" defense doesn't work here. The host clearly just wanted to socialize not host a drunken free-for-all. If you really want back into their scene, you can talk to the host one-on-one and see what they feel, but I wouldn't get my hopes up. ###### |
About a month ago a stray cat showed up on my doorstep. She had no identification or microchip. I took her in, fed her, named her Bertha, but I was also actively looking for her owners. I don't have the ability to permanently take care of another pet, but I wanted to do the right thing and make sure she had the best chance of having a good life.
Eventually I found the owner and returned the cat. I missed Bertha but was glad she was back with her owner.
Well Bertha has been back at my door every day since then, meowing for hours until I let her back in. I contacted the owner again and asked her to keep the cat inside. The owner responded that her husband died about a month ago, she's trying to take of her 3 kids during this lockdown, and that Bertha is an indoor outdoor cat. I understand that this must be a hard time for the owner, and I'm giving them slack for not knowing the cat was missing for a month, but at this point they're neglecting her to the point that she doesnt want to go back to them. She's also been reported at all my other neighbor's houses too.
AITA for coming to the conclusion that I have to send the cat to a shelter? I would never want to hurt her, but she's being neglected, and she could possibly be a transmitter of the coronavirus if shes bouncing from house to house all over our neighborhood. ###### | YTA- the cat hasn't been missing for a month guys, the ladies husband died a month ago and she's been struggling since. Don't take the cat anywhere- it's not yours but perhaps talk to the family about this issue and together you can find a resolution that is manageable for everyone. ###### |
I woke up later than usual today and heard my daughter (16) moving around downstairs. I went down and she was playing a video game. We said good morning, and I asked her how long she’d been up. She said for a couple of hours.
I jokingly said “bet you enjoyed having the house to yourself for a while” because my husband and I are usually are at work all day, and she’s usually home alone.
She said “yeah, actually, it was kinda nice”. I didn’t expect a response like that, and frankly, it hurt my feelings. I said “oh, do I not do enough for you?” She rolled her eyes and said “you know that’s not what I meant” and I said “do you really hate your family that much?” She just ignored me that time.
I gave her a chance to make things right and just drop it, and said “you know I’m not being serious” and she said “no I don’t because you say shit like this all the time”. I don’t tolerate that kind of language in my house, and she didn’t even drop it like she should have. I sent her to her room, and she went.
I discussed it with my husband, and I went up to her room, and told her that from now on, since she can’t appreciate family time, that she may not leave her room until we are up. She got very pouty, and told me that I was being unreasonable.
Thing is, she doesn’t appreciate anything I do. She constantly manipulates me, and doesn’t understand how hard isolation has been for me. Considering how she treats me, I think I am being more than reasonable. AITA? ###### | YTA- shes 16, she’s a teenager, it’s nice to have time away from one another especially when we’ve all been in lockdown. She even told you she didn’t mean it like you said it, you sound too sensitive ###### |
ok so im 16 and my stepdad has been with my mom for like 5 years now. he told me he was married before and had a daughter who's in her twenties now but idk what happened, i just know he doesn't really talk to her. he told me his first wife was a massive bitch and that's why he left but also said he used to drink a lot more too so idk. anyway he told me his daughter's name once and it's pretty uncommon so i found her on facebook. she looks exactly like my stepdad too so like i knew she was the right girl. I just told her who i was and asked why she and my stepdad don't really talk and said she might want to give him a chance cuz he doesn't drink anymore and is a cool guy now. she took like 3 days to respond but all she said was (im gonna copy paste it)
"I know you're a kid and this isn't your problem, and I know you have a very different relationship with your stepdad than i do, but the things that he did and said to me when i was a child have made it impossible for us to have a relationship. i'm glad to hear that he's sober but it's not enough for me to want to have him in my life. thanks for reaching out but please do not contact me again"
I messaged back that she didn't need to be bitchy and she blocked me. I told my stepdad and he got really angry and started throwing shit, he started ranting about her and his ex-wife and about how they never respected him and then told me i was a shithead for bringing this back up because he was "over it" until i did this. it was freaky because I'd never seen him like that before. i was just trying to find out what happened between him and my stepsister, am i really the asshole? ###### | Yta- She wasn't bitchy either, she was very kind and calm. ###### |
Throwaway account because I think my kids might have seen Reddit on my phone.
I F40 have two kids, (F14) and (M11). When I married my husband, I discovered we had vastly different lifestyles. He ate junk food, I preferred to stay healthy. Unfortunately this has been a problem with our kids now.
My daughter eats pretty healthy, but enjoys junk food too, and is roughly five pounds overweight. (She’s 5’2 and 130 pounds, but is active) However my pediatrician has discussed some concern about it and suggested placing my daughter on a diet.
My son is not a healthy eater, he only likes junk food and does not eat healthy at all but has a fast metabolism and stays underweight.
I’ve started prohibiting my daughter from eating junk food, but not my son. My reasoning is that she needs to loose weight in order to deserve these sweets. She’s upset that her brother who eats worse/more than she does is allowed to continue eating sweets. Her reasoning is that because he eats more than her, does not play sports and just plays video games and is unhealthier when it comes to food choices means he should also have to eat healthy.
My husband has sided with her on this but my son hasn’t. My son has told her it’s only fair because he isn’t “fat”. (She’s not too chubby, but there’s a bit of extra weight around her stomach.)
After this, my husband has come to me saying I need to be nicer to her and make them both eat healthy because now my daughter is self conscious about her weight and is developing anxiety and an eating disorder. I don’t believe him though because a medical professional didn’t diagnose her. She’s fine, at least in my opinion.
TL/DR: My daughter is kind of overweight according to her doctor so I make her eat healthy but not her underweight bro it her.
AITA? ###### | Yta- not only are you damaging your relationship with your daughter you are damaging her self worth and mental health.
What kind of message are you sending her by doing this that a number on a scale is more important than anything else! ###### |
Just finished up my second year of college and it fucking sucked. I really don't wanna listen to professors tell me what to do all day and I don't wanna work some stupid job where some middle-aged dude with a beer belly bosses me around all day either. I fucking hate school and I fucking love music, so I decided to dropout of college and quit my job bussing tables to pursue a career as a music artist. I've spent the passed month grinding and learning about dubstep, psytrance, hip hop, and riddim production.
I told my mom about this and she wasn't supportive at all. "The odds are one in a million", "stay in school and work towards an actual career", etc. eventually just straight up said she's not gonna pay for my rent or my car payment anymore since I'm not working towards a "realistic financial goal" in here eyes. Buncha bullshit if you ask me. I don't think Skrillex and Lil Uzi Vert were worried about "realistic financial goals" and imma be on that level soon so I'm not even stressing tbh. If a mother can't support her son's dreams then she can fuck right off. I feel like she's giving me shit since she doesn't beleive in me but she'll be begging for some fame once I make it and I ain't gonna give it to her, so I decided to block her number to make that clear. I felt like its the right thing to do since I can't have that bs negativity in my life but my friends are tellin me I took it too far. Am I really an asshole for chasing my dreams? Or is my mom the asshole for shitting on them? Honest question ###### | YTA- let me ask you this. What if it doesn’t work out and you don’t become a music producer and then you’re left without your dream career AND your mom? She doesn’t owe you your rent payment or any other money. It’s fine if college isn’t for you. It’s not for everyone. But if you’re going to chase your dreams you need to find a way to support yourself while doing it and quitting your job isn’t a good start.
It will be tough to meet the goal you want to meet and she’s not wrong in wanting you to have a solid backup plan. YTA because it sounds like your mom was trying to help you out and set you up for success and you’re blocking her number the second she cuts off your cash flow because you’re making the wrong decisions. Continue working and earning an income and have a back up plan if music doesn’t work out. You’re an adult now and part of being that is making responsible decisions. This post makes you sound very childish and immature and you should probably rethink quite a bit about it. ###### |
I have two daughters
Ella (22F)
Lauren (19F)
Ella and her boyfriend (26M) are living with me currently because they’re saving for a house so they’re living rent free, Ella works part time and goes university while Lauren doesn’t work and goes university.
Ella doesn’t really wear jewellery apart from a ring her boyfriend gave her for her 22nd in March, she spent all day bragging about the ring.
Lauren came to me crying a while ago because apparently she snuck into Ellas room and took the ring.
She told Ella initially that she left it at the friends but told me she lost it at the beach, I sat Ella down and told her what had happened and offered to replace it.
She refused told me she expected the full £860 from Lauren and she doesn’t care how long it takes Lauren to get the money, it just isn’t possible for Lauren to get that type of money especially just for a ring.
I told Ella no, she can consider it rent from both her and her boyfriend.
She broke down screaming and crying about what a fucking asshole I am and hasn’t left her room since.
My wife is on my side but MIL isn’t and has offered Ella her grandmothers ring which was meant to go to my wife.
AITA? ###### | YTA- Lauren didn’t accidentally break something of Ellas in the normal course of her day she made the decision to steal something that she knew was very valuable from her sister and then was careless enough to wear it to the beach of all places and lose it. Could Lauren have been more polite when talking to you sure but she was perfectly with in her rights to be upset and want to be compensated for the value of the ring. She suggested that Lauren pay for it over time which seems pretty sensible to me even if it takes a long time anyone can make £860 pounds eventually. You mentioned that Ella has a part time job but Lauren doesn’t maybe it’s time for Lauren to get one. If you want to charge your kids rent that’s up to you but you shouldn’t roll it out as a punishment and apply it to only one daughter.
I don’t know if we are missing some context here but this whole post makes it sound like you are showing a lot of favouritism ###### |
Me: 30s/F
Brother (Sean): 30/M
His fiancé: (Ashley): 31/F
Ashley’s sister: 33/F (I’ll call her Kate)
My brother Sean has been dating Ashley for 2 years, and they got engaged about two months ago.
Ashley has always been very kind to me and my family. But she isn’t close with her blood siblings. And by not close I mean like... she hasn’t talked to them in years. Not a single word. They don’t even exchange birthday or Christmas cards. I’ve met her parents and they seem fine so I don’t think there’s any big trauma. I on the other hand, am very very close with my brother and sister. I couldn’t bear not contacting them on their birthdays or Christmas.
Ashley is one of those people who can wiggle out of any conversation. Example:
Me: how’s Kate?
Ashley: she’s fine as far as I know.
Me: don’t you want to find out? I’d want to know how my sister is.
Ashley: oh, would you?
Me: yeah, I would. She’s your blood relative.
Ashley: yep she is.
Etc. etc. etc. it’s pretty rude if I’m honest. Recently she and Sean got engaged. I was very curious about her extended family, so I did some social media digging and found her sister Kate. I messaged her, just saying hi and explaining we will be related soon.
Kate seems absolutely fine and like a nice person. I can't understand why Ashley would write her off.
I told Ashlry I connected with Kate, and she got extremely mad, said I had no right to reach out to her. Sean also said I was the asshole, but he was a little gentler.
So AITA? ###### | Yta- it’s none of your business why she isn’t close with her sister. Stay in your own lane. ###### |
My girlfriend always calls herself her cat’s Mommy. She’ll pick him up and say things like, “Do you love Mommy? He loves Mommy!” And then she’ll say to me, “Aw, he wants to see his Daddy” and just hand me her cat. She calls her Dad “Grandpa” and her Mom “Grandma” to this cat. It’s a cat!
I told her that it’s weird and I can’t take it anymore. It’s so creepy. She’s not the cat’s Mommy, it’s a cat, his mother is a cat. She says “well I raised him from a kitten so I feel like his Mommy” and I said “yeah but he’s still a cat, you are not and will never be his mother.” She actually started to cry.
AITA? It’s a cat, she’s not his mother, it reminds me of that drawing of a human that’s pregnant with a cat. It’s just weird and it wouldn’t take that much effort for her to stop being so weird. It’s embarrassing when my friends are over and she’s like “oh he wants to see Daddy!” When referring to a cat. ###### | YTA- It’s harmless. People say it all the time. There’s no actual issue here, you’re just being controlling. ###### |
*My stepdaughter moved out when she was 19, she got a flat with her boyfriend a year later*
*I moved in with her dad the same year with my daughter (12F) and everything's going great, I've never seen eye to eye with my step daughter, I don't approve of her job as a cam girl but she says it pays very well and is very open/almost proud of her job, I'm not in a place where I can criticize*
*She (21F) recently found out she's pregnant and her boyfriend wants absolutely nothing to do with her or the baby*
*She still works while she isn't showing,I'm not sure if she can continue while she's pregnant (?) she could continue to paying for a flat if she wanted*
*she told her dad she wanted to move home and go college and university, meaning she would stay at home until she finished, she would hire a babysitter*
*Her dad jumped at the opportunity without even asking me, he's always been trying to make up for not being there while she grew up- he had weekend visitation*
*She's never approved of our relationship, we've never seen eye to eye, she loves my daughter though,me and her father are trying for a baby and I don't think having added stress of having her around for however long will help*
*I said if she stayed she would have to pay rent and until she finished college, at latest*
*my husband wants her to save up instead since we don't need extra money, claiming I'm an AH for only having "shallow" reasons to push his daughter away, and for not being supportive of him trying to have a better relationship with his daughter*
AITA? ###### | YTA- is your daughter going to have to pay rent through college as well? Or is she exempt because she’s YOUR daughter? I’d tread carefully, you don’t have a child with him yet and as much as he may consider your daughter his daughter too, he has an actual biological daughter whose life he wasn’t very present in and that type of guilt can be taken advantage by his daughter. It’s going to seem like he wasn’t very present when she was a child and now that he has the opportunity to be there for her he’s choosing his new wife and her daughter creating a new family for himself that she is not welcome into. Don’t dig your own grave ###### |
My 12yo nephew is getting a bit of a unibrow and bushy and seems to be unaware of it. So are his parents. I don't want him to be teased and doing something stupid like shaving it, so I pointed it out. I said "dude, you need to fix those brows. You need them waxed and trimmed" and it's something I do regularly like shaving my face. He resisted but he let me do it after I showed him pictures of really bad unibrows.
His dad (my brother picked him up) later on. Later I get an text from his mom asking what the fuck did I do to his eyebrows. I told her I fixed them. The funny part is that she instantly noticed that his eyebrows were done she saw them. She said I had no right to do it. I told her he's 12 and is old enough to decide himself. It's not a tattoo and even she has to admit he looks much better. ###### | YTA- if he had asked you to because he was self conscious it would still be questionable without consulting his parents but you created an insecurity just so you could fix it. 100% AH move. ###### |
So around when my son was 10 or 11 I told my wife that I thought he would be gay when he was older. (Or was already gay I reckon since you are born with a sexuality.) She thought I was being ridiculous. Now I want to make sure I say, neither me and my wife are bigots, neither of us care at all if our kids are gay or straight. I just believed my son would be gay based on a lot of factors.
Finally she told me to drop it and I said okay okay, how about this? Let's bet on it. Bet $50. She kind of rolled her eyes and agreed to it.
Well lo and behold! Our son now 17 came out as gay a few days ago. First of all I am very happy for him that he came out, and of course we told him we love him and all that, but also I was over the moon that I had won the bet. After he went back to his room I just kind of looked at my wife expecting her reaction. She was like what? I was like so how about my $50 ha ha?
She had forgotten about the bet! She remembered it when I reminded her. She was just kind of like "oh brother" about it. She still has not paid me the $50. Now I know it might be silly but a bet is a bet. I asked her to pay up again this morning and she got really angry at me. We had a huge fight. It is causing a big interpersonal conflict between us.
AITA for wanting my $50? I mean, I called it. I deserve the money. ###### | YTA- I’m glad you’re not a bigot but this is something so silly and tbh kind of dehumanizing for the kid. I’m a lesbian and it would break my heart hearing my parents bet if I was a lesbian or not.
I’m not wishing you Ill will or saying your a bigot but this does come off as insensitive. Even if there were factors playing into it, you were probably basing it off of certain stereotypes and if your son wasn’t gay that would still hurt to say.
Not the worst thing I’ve read a parent do though but still an asshole move.
Consider how your child might feel too and consider your wife’s feelings too because it seemed you were stuck on this idea and proving it right rather than seeing your son as a human being. ###### |
I didn’t pay for it all me and my brothers chipped into it and helped buy her a new car (which is essential to her right now). My wife doesn’t need a new car right now as much she she might want one. Her car is a little old (2012) and has had some problems but I fixed those issues.
My wife’s angry and bitter right now. She also has her own job, so I don’t think it’s my responsibility to buy her a new car right now. I make more money than her but still, she doesn’t absolutely need one right now.
She told me she can’t believe she’s been asking me for awhile and I “go behind her back” and do this for my mom, like she’s just a stranger.
Who is in the wrong? ###### | YTA- I’m a little shocked at all the NTAs. Are these people married? And would they be ok if their spouse spent $4k without discussing it? $4k is a lot, especially if your immediate family unit doesn’t have enough to comfortably buy a new car. ###### |
A few months ago I flew with my 2 twin sons (aged 11) back to the UK from a trip in the USA.
I had booked economy tickets for the 3 of us. We were all booked to sit together in the left 3 seats. However when we boarded, someone was sat in my seat and it turned out that for some reason my seat was double booked.
The air hostess asked if I would like an upgrade to business class, to which I said yes. It's rare that I fly in business and I didn't want to pass up the opportunity. I left my two kids in economy who were then sat next to the guy who had my economy seat.
The kids were fine with it and didn't complain at all.
However when I told my wife about this she was very angry as 'something could have happened to the kids' as they were sat next to a stranger and it was my duty to protect them. She feels that I was greedy and I should have given the upgrade to the person who had my seat. I thought she was being ridiculous but even up until now she keeps bringing it up and we've had many arguments over this. AITA? ###### | YTA- I would never have done that. Anything could happen, your wife is right about that. Kids get scared when turbulence gets bad and need a hand to squeeze. What if they just wanted you to buy them a drink. The stranger could indeed be a creep. It just wasn't cool. ###### |
I have been running around a lot lately amd my hamstrings are getting kinda tight. I was stretching them in my backyard in a sports bra + shorts. When I was turning over I noticed the neighbour looking out his window at me. As soon as he saw me look he left the window. The next time I looked he was back when he noticed he left the window. This happened one other time and then I went inside. So I texted the neighbour's wife what's up later that evening. Next time he sees me (he works from home) he says that wasn't cool and he 'was just cleaning the house' and wasn't looking at me.
AITA for texting her? ###### | YTA- get over yourself. You seriously texted his wife? Ridiculous.😂 ###### |
My girlfriend usually cooks for the both of us, and she's an AMAZING cook, really. Lately however she's been very busy with work, while I've had a lot of free time. At her insistence, I finally decided to do the cooking last night.
Now, I wouldn't consider myself an amazing chef, but I know my strengths and weaknesses. I made a simple dish - spaghetti bolognese. Can't mess that up right? Well apparently you can. My girlfriend started ripping in to it like she's fucking Gordon Ramsay on kitchen nightmares. The pasta was 'bland' and 'unseasoned'. (Bullshit btw, I put a whole tablespoon of salt into the water it was cooked in.)
Here's where I lost control. Instinct took over - I grabbed the salt shaker, took the lid off, and dumped the whole of its contents all over her pasta. She was PISSED. (I don't know what I was expecting.) She dumped her bowl in the sink (with the pasta), and went straight to bed.
Now, I'll admit that I may have been an AH here, but I think this is more of an ESH, with her being the slightly bigger AH for disrespecting me and making me clean the sink. What do you think Reddit? ###### | YTA- from your other comments she was just commenting on the taste and maybe even offering advice on how to cook in future. You didn't 'overseason' the food you deliberately wrecked her meal and made it inedible. So yeah YTA ###### |
A few months ago I flew with my 2 twin sons (aged 11) back to the UK from a trip in the USA.
I had booked economy tickets for the 3 of us. We were all booked to sit together in the left 3 seats. However when we boarded, someone was sat in my seat and it turned out that for some reason my seat was double booked.
The air hostess asked if I would like an upgrade to business class, to which I said yes. It's rare that I fly in business and I didn't want to pass up the opportunity. I left my two kids in economy who were then sat next to the guy who had my economy seat.
The kids were fine with it and didn't complain at all.
However when I told my wife about this she was very angry as 'something could have happened to the kids' as they were sat next to a stranger and it was my duty to protect them. She feels that I was greedy and I should have given the upgrade to the person who had my seat. I thought she was being ridiculous but even up until now she keeps bringing it up and we've had many arguments over this. AITA? ###### | YTA- children under 13 that fly alone are watched over by flight attendants. There’s reasons for that. Why wouldn’t you just give the other person the seat and sit with your kids. ###### |
So I'm 18M and I live with my older sisters(20F/23F) our parents pay all our expenses and we go to college and stuff. Well today we had to go grocery shopping but since only one person can go at a time I was picked to go. When my sister(23F) texted me the list I asked if I can not buy the tampons and someone else can go later. She asked why I said I'm embarrassed to buy tampons. She told me to grow up and just buy the tampons. We augured back and forth till eventually my sister(20F) just went in return I have to clean her bathroom. AITA? ###### | YTA- As a girl, if I saw a guy buying tampons I would think “how sweet he’s doing that for her.” ###### |
My girlfriend and I have been together since we were 13 (we’re 20 now), and she’s had her cat for the duration of our relationship. I’m gonna go ahead and say this now: I don’t care for cats since I’m allergic to them and hers was no exception. I’m not really an animal person in general, but if I were to get one it wouldn’t be a cat. They’re disgusting and they creep me out.
My girlfriend and I moved in together at 18, and I was always under the impression that she would leave the cat with her parents since she knew how much I didn’t like them. Long story short the cat came with her and while I wasn’t thrilled about it, I allowed it to stay under the conditions that it wouldn’t sleep in our bed, it wouldn’t sit on the furniture, and it wouldn’t go into my office space.
Over the course of the last two years, I would come home from work and my girlfriend would be chilling on the couch with the cat after I’d asked her not to. I’d get ready to climb into bed and there’d be cat hair on my sheets so I know she let it into the bedroom. Not to mention, she has what I feel like is an unhealthy obsession with this thing. She’s constantly talking to and cooing at it like it’s a person and it drives me up a wall. For a while, I just slept in my office so I wouldn’t have to deal with an itchy face and puffy eyeballs.
With us being stuck at home now, it’s even harder for me to have my own space. The straw that broke the camels back was when I went into my office and found her cat sitting in the window. I’ve asked time and time again for her cat to stay out of my space and I feel like she deliberately disrespects my wishes, so I found a walk-in surrender shelter today and dropped the cat off. I haven’t told my girlfriend, and being that it’s an indoor/outdoor cat I hope she just thinks it ran away. I love my girlfriend, but her cat was legitimately our only source of conflict. ###### | YTA- Animals are a lifetime commitment and honestly if a cat is a deal breaker you should have been an adult.
This is controlling abusive behavior akin to destroying someone's thing because you're upset at them, made so much worse because you put an innocent animal in a vulnerable position where it's scared, alone, stressed, and now lives in a sterile unfamiliar place until they maybe get adopted (harder for older cats)
You took a living creature your GF loves and without telling her abducted it and intend to set it up in a shortened lifetime of loneliness.
Tell her where he cat is and at least give her the chance to leave you and take care of her cat. ###### |
I very recently had my first daughter, she’s 9 weeks right now.
I’ve been with my husband for 8 years, he has a 10y/o and a 9y/o with an ex - they’re still very much friendly and split custody equally.
I want to move back home, my mother is sick and I want to give her a chance to know the baby- even if we only stay for a few months, I’m hoping once my husband sees how beautiful it is there he’ll want to stay.
It’s about 11hours away from where we live, it requires a ferry so it’s not a simple drive either which is what’s so off putting for my husband.
I don’t expect him to live up there, I want to visit for a few months so my mother can see our baby (him liking it enough to move would be a perk)
He can Skype with the children and they can visit as often as possible.
We told his children’s mother so we can figure something out, custody wise, if we were to move.
She isn’t too happy, calling me an AH for expecting my husband to move away from the children and for expecting her to be ok with it.
AITA?
**We won’t be going ahead with this for a while** ###### | YTA-
It’s a tough situation for you with your mother being ill but you met this man where you are now and settled down with him knowing his custody arrangements. You’re asking him too much. Imagine him moving away 11 hours from your newborn now and the other woman saying “Well, he can visit.” It would break your heart and that’s what your doing to his kids and their Mam.
It’s up to you to visit your Mam with your baby as often as you can, with minimal change for the older kids. ###### |
I am a landlord in a relatively small city in New England (less than 15,000 year-round residents). I inherited several rental properties but my company has been steadily growing so that we are now the largest property holders in the city and control roughly 60% of residential rentals. This problem has cropped up over the years and I alway feel very torn about it, as I can see both sides of the argument and thought I would see what the Internet has to say....
I NEVER rent to friends/family. No exceptions. In the beginning of my career I leased an apartment to a friend who wasn’t the most qualified and subsequently lost her job. I gave her way more slack than I would normally give anyone, but at the end she ended up owing almost $8000 in rent and I had to evict her and her family. It obviously destroyed the relationship, hurt my business and I was vilified to mutual friends. Since then, I have never done it again.
The issue is that it is a very tight rental market, our city has a shortage of rentals and we often receive 50+ applications for a 2 bedroom apartment. A few times over the years, I’ve been approached by friends who need a rental, people who are qualified, have good jobs and great history with other landlords in the city, people I would have happily rented to if they weren’t my friends/family. AITA for not renting to them just because I know them? I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. I just value my relationships and this dynamic (them owing me $1000+ a month/calling me to chat oh and also their faucet is leaking) would almost certainly change things between us. Let me have it, AITA??? ###### | YTA- It was reasonable until you mentioned you own 60% of the local rentals and are continuing to grow. It seems like you are turning away people with nowhere else to go. I would also point out people who so easily turn their backs on friends, or worse family in need tend to be less like-able then they believe they are. You may realize you don’t actually have any friends, just people who treat you better than you probably deserve. ###### |
I (25F) have a friend that we’ll call J (30F). J is married to T (32M). We were all friends and hung out together at their house a bunch.
At one point, T caught some feelings for me, and there was some inappropriate texting. Yes, I fully know we were both assholes there, but that’s not why I’m here. Everything was brought out into the open, and amends were made. Took a long time, but trust was built back up. Now T and I are talking again behind Js back. It is 100% innocent and I kept all the messages just to prove it in case it came down to it.
T and I have a lot in common and we really are just friends, but we know that J will never trust us because of how royally we messed up before. Neither one of us have many friends, so we don’t want to stop. We really and truly enjoy talking to each other, but we don’t want it to blow up and cause problems.
So judge me reddit, I need help. AITA for continuing to talk to T? ###### | YTA- if it wasn’t a problem, you’d tell her. ###### |
I had a bit to drink last night, and was sitting outside on my porch. My neighbor came outside and was doing a little hula hoop and dancing, I got a bit bold and started completing her. I’m friendly with the neighbor, she’s an attractive woman. She wasn’t offended by my drunk behavior and showed me a few tricks with her hula hoop.
I let some...too specific comments about her body slip, and immediately apologized to her. She told me not to worry about it, and I went back in.
Wife asked me what I was talking to the neighbor about, I told her what happened, and she got really upset. She had been watching us talking from the window and watched her show me some tricks or “dance for me” as she put it. I could understand why she was upset, I apologized to her and told her it wouldn’t happen again. She didn’t accept my apology. In fact she told me that she won’t accept my apology until I call her beautiful/give her compliments within earshot of our neighbor a few times. I told her I thought she was being ridiculous, and asked her how she thought I should go about doing it. She told me I could whistle at her while she’s running, yell to her while she’s gardening, just something that the neighbor would notice.
I apologized to her again, but told her that I would not be doing the crazy shit she is suggesting. She got angry and we proceeded to argue. She’s making me sleep in the living room until I concede, and refusing to speak to me. She thinks I’m an asshole for refusing to repair the relationship her way after I “betrayed” her. I basically just let it slip that my neighbor was sexy while I was drunk. I apologized immediately. I didn’t betray her. I’ve apologized a thousand times, am I an asshole for not going along with this complimenting thing?
Edit:
I want to make sure everyone understands...she wants me to specifically compliment her and catcall her in front of my neighbor. ###### | YTA your title is really misleading and your behavior was totally inappropriate. You're married dude, what are you doing getting drunk and then catcalling/making comments about your neighbor's body? ###### |
I am a fourteen year old guy.
My birthday is in sixteen days, and my mom is asking for birthday ideas. (Where we should go, what I want, etc)
It’s quite obvious I can’t go to the local amusement park like I wanted. Last year, instead of asking for a gift, I asked if a friend and I could go there. It was really fun, so I wanted to go again. But, like I said, that’s obviously out of the picture.
I told my mom a while back, that for my birthday, from all my family, I only wanted one of two things.
Either a cat, or a dirt bike.
I specifically told her if I got a cat, I’d pay adoption fees, I’d take care of it, and id pay for its food.
And if I got a dirt bike, it didn’t have to be expensive. It could be a used one that’s seconds from falling apart, as long as it worked.
Well, it was a no to both.
She keeps telling me that if I don’t make up my mind for other birthday ideas, I’ll get nothing.
Every time I show mild interest in something, she pretends like I worship and want twenty of them.
She finds every chance she can to push the cat or dirt bike topics out of the picture.
She keeps suggesting I ask for a game, or gaming console, but I don’t want something that will stop me from going outside.
TL:DR; Mom won’t get me one of the two presents I want despite the fact I said I’d help pay for most of them even though they aren’t that expensive in the first place. ###### | YTA your mom doesn't owe you a cat or a dirt bike, dude. You're not a guy, you're a boy. You are too young for road rages on a dirt bike and if you're living with your mom, a living animal is not yours alone. If you fail to clean its poop or socialize it correctly she'll be the one cleaning up its messes for you. Just cuz it's your birthday doesn't mean you're entitled to whatever thing you want that your parents will have to deal with the consequences of. ###### |
Ok so this happened a few months ago, I have 2 kids, one is 5 and one is 3.
The whole family went over to my brothers house for my Dads birthday, anyway we were having a great time and I put the kids upstairs with some sandwiches while the adults talked.
So later on my brother went to get the kids down to play a board game, and he found that they had broken his gaming console (an old Nintendo one) and there were sandwich bits in the cartridge slot, he held it together in front of the kids but pulled me aside and really chewed me out.
He yelled about how much he loved that console and how it had been with him since he was 6 years old (our Dad bought it for him after a business trip) .
So he got pissed and wanted me to buy him a new one, o don’t get why as it was just a console and the games were old anyway. He demanded that I buy him one to replace it but I told him he needs to grow up and stormed out of the room.
AITA? ###### | YTA your kids are your responsibility. If they break someone's property intentionally or not it's up to you to repair or replace it. You were rude to your brother and justified your kids breaking his things because "he knew they were coming over and should have protected it." Under that logic if your brother decides to come over and break your TV he doesn't have to replace it because you knew he was coming over. Your entitlement complex is out of this world. ###### |
I have a daughter (16F) and a few weeks ago she sat me down and told me that she was struggling with purging. She said it was due to mental issues going on with school and her friends, and she talked about how she was feeling sad all the time.
In response, I told her to start a journal and think of at least three positive thoughts a day and that would help. However, when I told a friend of mine about it she said I should put her in therapy, as I should not be trying to deal with her mental health issues.
Personally, I do not think this is about mental health. My daughter is always smiling and happy with her friends, and it seems as though she only tells me these things when she wants something (i.e. to be allowed to hang out with her boyfriend). I have a hard time buying that she's actually dealing with mental illness, and I don't want her to be put on medication because she's a minor and it's probably her hormones.
So, AITA? ###### | YTA your daughter opened up about some serious issues she is having and her told to think positive and write a journal. Get her some actual help you insanely huge asshole. ###### |
So my dad constantly asks for my netflix password. I have the cheapest account and I don't want him messing up my recommendations. He has hundreds of channels on his smart tv plus sling and hulu, so he has plenty of crap to watch. But he wants anything I have. (This happens ALL the time- he tried to take an art piece I made to put it on the deck outside because he wanted it. Or he tries to take any food I've made for myself instead of making his own or eating something that was made for the whole family. He never takes no for an answer and does whatever he wants.) Also he tends to patronize me for anything I do, so I know that he would try to put me down for anything I've watched. Well, he got into my account because I was watching it with a friend and it stayed logged in. He got in while I wasn't home, so he knew that he was going behind my back and watching it without my permission. He was halfway through Tiger King when I confronted him about it, and his only response was "Tiger King is for adults." So basically he was calling me a kid (I'm 20, so legally an adult in my state) and justifying himself stealing my netflix account because "I shouldn't have been watching Tiger King anyway". I changed my password and kicked him off, and he got really angry. He threatened to kick me off the family music account (I don't really care about that because I can literally get it on spotify free) and to not let me drive the family car (which is what I take to get to work). His point is that he lets me live in his house and he pays my drivers' insurance so I owe him my netflix password. Is he right, AITA here? (Let me point out, he has plenty of money to pay for his own and if he really REALLY needs to watch Tiger King he can easily get a free trial for a whole month. Not steal his daughter's account.) ###### | YTA your an adult in the same house, it’s crazy to have two Netflix accounts. You know you can set up multiple profiles... then your recommendations won’t be affected. ###### |
My ex and I got divorced five years ago. Our youngest was 17. All of our kids were fine with it and have their own lives. I see them as much as my ex. My youngest "blamed" me for the end of our marriage. I was very close with him when he was a kid so this baffled me.
All of a sudden he blocks me from all aspects of his life and I only know what's going on through my ex and kids or ilwhen he asks them to ask me for money. The funny part is I have a better relationship with my ex than with him. We still have family get togethers with the kids and grandkids. He won't come if I go.
He moved to the other side of the state with his girlfriend last year. Earlier this week, I was having lunch with my girlfriend and saw my son down the street. He was in town for his friend's birthday party.
We made eye contact and he said something to his girlfriend. He started to walk up the street with his girlfriend towards us. Keep in mind, we haven't exchanged a word in three years. He looked like he was in a good mood. I know he wanted to come up and say "hi" and introduce himself to my girlfriend.
I looked at him with those "dad eyes" and shook my head, basically telling him not to bother me.
He got the message and walked the other way. He's almost 23 and not a kid. He needs to learn that when you burn bridges, you burn bridges. ###### | YTA you’re the parent. The child doesn’t owe you anything. Your adult decisions affected his entire childhood. Now he’s prolly older and trying to make amends for things he did AS A CHILD and you’re acting like you’re 12. Goodness gracious this is ridiculous. ###### |
I'll tried to keep it short. I'm (30M) a gamer and have been for a long time. I've been with my gf (30F) for 6 years and i got her into gaming a few years ago.
We dont often play together as we are into different games however I convinced her to play a popular first person shooting game that we could play campaign co-op.
We play, we finish the game, i get the last 3 achievemnts on steam to pop up for completing the game and she didnt. All other ahcievemrnts popped at rhe same time? Just not these end game ones for her.
She is pissed. She is an achievement hunter. She says part of the enjoyment of playing games on steam is popping the acheivements. She has spent hours doing this for other games to try and complete them.
I tell her that the acheivements are absolutely pointless, it brings no benefits to game play and that they are worth nothing. She told me to not put down the way she plays and that i was making her feel like shit which i dont think i was.
Now she isnt really speaking to me and isnt putting much effort into playing with me anymore. AiTA? ###### | YTA you've literally told her she's having fun the wrong way...... ###### |
I own a small business and my kids (10 and 12) help me with the business after school.
I don’t pay them, because we’re all members of the family who need to do our job and contribute.
They met some other kids who work at their family’s business and apparently those kids are making minimum wage, so now my kids are starting to demand I pay them.
They do pretty minimal tasks, nothing difficult, stacking and sorting, logging things into a spreadsheet, light cleaning, answering the phone.
They’re really pushing for me to pay them now and aren’t having nearly as much fun as we used to working together since they found out their friends are being paid.
I feel bad that they’re not enjoying themselves as much anymore, but feel it’s absurd for me to be expected to pay them. They’re my kids and this is their family. Plus, I never want to reverse a parenting decision because “that’s how my friends do it at their house” it sets a bad precedent.
But I’m starting to really get worried I’m being too stubborn now, because they do good work, and if their friends are getting paid times might have just changed since I was younger working at my family’s business. Am I the asshole for not paying them? ###### | YTA You're teaching them that their labor should be free and setting a bad example. The least you could do is put wages toward a college fund. ###### |
I (20M) live with my large family, and I'm stuck with all of them thanks to the ongoing situation. It's been a tough month, and my mother (47F) has been looking for ways to make money.
She's had some credit card debt. Nothing major, but because her businesses' incomes have dried up, she hasn't had any way to pay her debts off. She's begun making hand sanitizers and face masks to generate some extra income, but she's always on the lookout for more cash to support the family.
A few months ago, she asked me if she could sell my old bike. I agreed, since I don't use it much anymore and it's just rusting in a corner of our storage. It took a while, but today, she was finally able to sell it, as well as my dad's bike.
I helped her to cart it out front and wiped it down before the buyer pulled up and paid for it. After the guy drove off and we went inside, I asked her for my share. She was bemused at first, and asked me who was the one who sold it in the first place. I said it was her, but it is still my bike and my property. She said she'd give me half. I disagreed, and asked her for the full amount as I also need money since I'm saving to move out sooner than later. I didn't mention the moving out part. That's a sore subject for her. She got upset and started ranting about how unreasonable I'm being and how the money would benefit me anyway once she pays off her debt and how she feeds and houses me and how she bought the bike for me as a gift anyway (6-7 years ago) and how I just horde my money (I don't, it's called savings). I sat silently while she went on for about 5-10 minutes and then she stormed off, got the cash and gave it to me, and is now giving me the cold shoulder. She gave me the full amount for my bike.
My family is making me feel bad for asking for the money, and I even tried to give her a portion, but she refuses to take it. AITA? ###### | YTA you want 100% of the money but didn’t bother to say anything first. You know she is trying to pay bills but you assumed she was selling it for you? ###### |
A friend invited me over a while ago and said “It’s been a while, let me buy you dinner and we can catch up.”
She ordered us a large pizza and salad. We had a good time. Then it was time to go. She said she was buying me dinner, so I packed the leftovers up and took them home with me.
Later the next day she texted me “Hey, did you see where the pizza ended up. Could’ve sworn I put it in the fridge but seriously can’t find it. worried (*her dog*) ate it, he doesn’t digest cheese well.”
I told her I took it home and she asked if I took some of it or all of it and I said all of it. She asked why I didn’t leave her any and I said because she said she was buying me dinner.
She said she bought me dinner for that night but intentionally bought a big pizza to have some left for the next day.
I told her she can easily afford another pizza if she wants one and I really didn’t understand what the big deal was since she offered to buy me dinner.
This friend is much better off than I am money wise, she still has financial support from her parents and I do not. I feel like it was very entitled of her to invite me over for dinner and not let me take the rest home. Honestly, if I’d known she’d be that stingy, I would’ve made a point to eat it all there and then.
But now it’s been a few weeks and things have noticeably cooled between us in what used to be a close friendship and I’m starting to worry. I asked a mutual friend if they knew and they said she was upset I never apologized over the leftovers thing and just how I handled the situation.
She’s usually a very fair and level headed person and I am shocked she’s held onto this for this long. I’m starting to worry I misjudged things and am actually the asshole in this situation and am leading the demise of our relationship. AITA? ###### | YTA you took them without asking when she paid for it. That's just bad manners. with leftovers, who ever paid defaults gets the leftovers unless they offer.
And it's not about if they could afford it and it wasn't that much. It's the fact that that was disrespectful and then when she brought it up, you made it clear you felt entitled to all of the leftovers when you're not. It's even worse you would have been greedy if you knew up front she wanted to keep all the leftovers. You should apologize for your poor manners if you still want your friend ###### |
There's no school and she doesn't have a job, so my stepdaughter has no responsibilities at the moment. For context, her dad was a single dad until he met me when she was 10, and now we have two more children together. Her dad is a GP so he works pretty much constantly and I'm left looking after 2 children by myself for the majority of the day, both 5 and 2 years old respectively.
Apart from cooking the daily family meal twice a week max, looking after the children 2x a week when we go grocery shopping and helping me put away said grocery shopping, my stepdaughter does nothing to help when I'm clearly in over my head and she's old enough to be taught a little responsibility. When I was her age, I was working two jobs and looked after my little sister and helped out around the house without being asked. She has to be asked to do every little thing apart from the things mentioned so far and almost always does them begrudgingly.
To teach her a better work ethic, I put together a chart full of chores she has to do every day. Until she's done them, she's banned from using her devices - both her phone and her ipad, and I also take away whatever book she's reading at the moment. She can have them back when all the chores are done. A typical day for the past week has involved her doing 5 chores of her choice from a list. The choices are, as examples: vacuum all of upstairs or downstairs, wash the floor, cook dinner, fold the laundry, do the dishes, dust any surfaces, tidy your siblings rooms, walk the dogs, pick up dog poop from the garden etc.
This was all working out fine until my husband caught onto what was going on, and he accused me of being lazy and punishing her for no reason and overstepping boundaries. I don't agree at all, the household is running much more smoothly with her help and I have more time to spend educating my 5 year old since school is out and I need to make sure he doesn't fall behind. AITA? ###### | YTA you started with you had 2 children, false you have 3. Maturing children into responsible adults is important, however I feel you have classic Cinderella step mother syndrome. ###### |
I'm a second-year radiology resident in a city in the Pacific Northwest. I'm a decent-looking guy, but a bit short and very socially awkward. So until recently, despite my best efforts, I've never been with anyone in any way at all. I was beginning to think I'd die a virgin without ever having been kissed...until I moved out here to Seattle. There, I found a lot of decently-put-together fairly attractive women that were living on the streets. I decided that was my best chance at sleeping with someone, and so decided to take advantage of the fact that I had a stable living situation to kick-start my romantic life.
I understand that these women are often vulnerable and in a shitty place in life; however, I always try to leave them in a better place than I found them. I buy them food and the supplies they need, leave them with a couple hundred dollars, and buy 'em six months' worth of a UPS mailbox so they can find jobs using the mailbox as a street address. I have a girlfriend, now, who's grateful for a place to live and is now in training to be a certified nurse's assistant. ###### | YTA you sound like a serial killer in training. Yikes ###### |
Me - 30 year old man
Her - 26 year old woman
&#x200B;
Me and my girlfriend has been together for 8 years, and our relationship is nontraditonal. I've taught her about the universe, freedom and i've told her that i think marriage is a trap and having kids is not a good future. We still hang out and make love, but don't talk to eachother in baby voices or walks in the park while kissing.
I personally hate mushy relationships, and have hate on Romantic Comedies. I feel a burning despise when i see young couples kissing like they're making a baby in public.
&#x200B;
Recently, when we where watching a romance movie that was going on TV, i saw her sighing. There was a scene were a man and a woman were on a romantic picnic. She said "Do you want to go one of those sometime?". I though she was joking, and jokingly said back in a baby-voice "sure, honeybuns."
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Next day, she wakes me up wearing a sundress and has made tons of sandwitches that she's put in a basket. I've always made fun of romantic people, and i thought she was taking the joke further and started laughing without control.
She got confused and asked me why i was laughing. I understood she wasn't joking and told her it's a little unusual and mushy to do a morning picnic. She got upset.
AITA ###### | YTA you sound extremely condescending with your whole "I taught her so much, I am the master of enlightenment and she was taught by me, the great master" attitude right of the bat. Like she couldn't possibly understand what 'freedom' is or can't possibly learn about the universe without you.
Then you ridicule her for wanting to go on a picnic... Something that isn't even necessarily romantic. Friends do it, family members do it. It's casual fun for everyone who likes outside and likes to eat.
Take your ass down a notch or 20 and take the woman on a picnic. You don't have to be PDA about it. It's a great way to enjoy the weather/outdoors in a casual way. ###### |
My ex-wife and I had a horrific divorce when my son was 10 and my daughter was 12. Originally my wife had been cheating on me but truthfully we were horrible to each other and this showed in the divorce. We ended up with a 50/50 custody but she fought tooth and nail to get full custody and for 2 years we kept slogging it through the courts. After the expenses of the divorce, alimony, child support I had enough and just wanted to never see her again and start my life anew.
She got full custody and I had visitation rights but she ended up using that to turn the kids away from me. Not being able to see the kids for the holidays because she'd decided to travel to the other side of the country to see her new husband's family turned into "He doesn't want to see you". Every visit felt like I was trying to undo my ex wife's lies to my kids. They didn't seem to believe a word I said and she had her claws in deep. All they wanted from me was money and unless I sent it I never heard from them. I bought them both new phones, but I never got a call or text that wasn't about money.
I ended up re-marrying and starting a new family, this time not making the same mistakes. I haven't heard from my children in just over 10 years. I tried contacting them both when they each turned 18, but my messages were ignored so I decided not to bother anymore.
I was recently contacted by my daughter who wants to rekindle a relationship with me, I decided not to reply. I have a new family and I feel like I tried before. Why did she wait so long to get in contact? My number or e-mail hasn't changed in more than a decade. Both of them knew where I lived, both of them knew I was open for a relationship but they decided to ignore it all.
AITA for wanting to focus on a family that appreciates and loves me? ###### | YTA You said yourself your ex-wife poisoned them against you, so is it really their fault? In any event, she is your flesh and blood and is reaching out. You could at least hear her out and give her a chance. ###### |
So, I’ve been dating H for about six months and everything going great, though if I had to pick on thing to change it would be that she’s a pushover, and can’t say no to anyone. Still when we’re alone or around our friends everything is going really well. The biggest issue is her overly zealous mother, who she was forced to move back in with during the pandemic.
H’s mom doesn’t like me, doesn’t think I’m good enough for her daughter, but at the same time always sucks up to me, because my dad is prominent in our community, and she thinks I’m like her daughter’s golden ticket to money. I’m definitely a jokester, always the life of the party, and honestly a lot of people don’t like that about me.
So, this weekend restrictions eased up, and her uncle invited us over for a little family get together. The mom was sort of rude like she always is, but everyone was having fun. I should mention her mother is a very strict Christian, H went to Catholic school, and he mom actually used to volunteer with some debutante thing where they taught the girls “respectable” behavior, so not the most fun woman.
Anyway, I was teasing H, and she took a dab of frosting from a cupcake and smeared it on my face. She knows me well enough to know I’m competative, and kind of an ass. Now the face just seemed too obvious so I smeared the rest of my cupcake on her cleavage.
She sort of muttered something about I take stuff too far, but she was laughing, and then I saw her mother’s face. Her mother looked pissed, so I said let me get that babe, and licked some of it off. Now H is mad because she had to listen to her mother’s lecture and she said I need to learn to tone it down when I’m with her family, but she says she loves me for me and I was just being my asshole self. I think she needs to learn to stand up to her mom, so AITA for having a little food fight with my girlfriend? ###### | YTA you licked your girlfriends cleavage in front of people ###### |
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