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4,000 | > He never saw my porn before we got together\n\nlol | {
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4,001 | I think some mistakes were made in the Office last season creatively. That being said I think some of the best, most interesting and funniest stuff we've ever done was last season. The Talahassee stuff was pretty sublime I thought. The Episode when I had an appendectamy was brilliant. | {
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4,002 | I definitely see myself using the computer, and also the internet, more and in a way that is both for my own enjoyment and for writing my memoirs. | {
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4,003 | brojob\nBrojob\nBROJOB | {
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4,004 | It's TIL. No one reads the article, myself included. I just check the comments to see if it's fake. | {
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4,005 | I liked the ending. A lot. | {
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4,006 | I somehow am responsible for my aunt doing this... Posted the iPhone microwave charging meme on my facebook and she nuked her brand new 5S. \n\nShe wanted me to pay for the replacement, but I've decided it'll be easier to just never talk to her again. | {
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4,007 | http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gun_politics_in_Australia | {
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4,008 | he doesn't even alt-tab from it, fucking amateur hour over here | {
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4,009 | Nature is really wasteful with her heating. Does she not care about the environment! | {
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4,010 | Hey folks, how we doing? Well I heard there were some challenges with your first dishes and I went to relay these concerns to the chef and she left. Just kinda... fucking... left. What happened was, in the midst of cooking food for the other 80 people in this restaurant, she had to stop what she was doing because you had the temerity to think that our job is to bend over and let you shove food up our butts. We suggest that you go home and google "private chefs." Have a good night. | {
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4,011 | I'm from New Jersey too. | {
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4,012 | Nah. Everyone's invited! | {
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4,013 | The things other men say to women are jaw dropping. I can understand some men feeling to old or unattractive to gain your attention but the far left approaches are just absurd. In short they are saying, "I have nothing of value to add to your life, so i was just hoping to take some from you'. | {
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4,014 | Same way everybody does. When you stop tasting shit on the toilet paper. | {
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4,015 | Might I suggest the [Breast Cancer Research Foundation](http://www.bcrfcure.org/) as a great place to donate in the future? The Susan G. Komen Foundation only puts 15% of funds raised towards cancer research and unfortunately spends a large amount on legal battles with other charities over its supposed ownership of the colour pink. | {
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4,016 | So you're saying ol' Greg had a downstairs mixup? \n\n[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCaCAGZDrCg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCaCAGZDrCg) NSFWish | {
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4,017 | /r/intrusivethoughts \nSomeone mentioned wanting to jump near a cliff or in front of a train.. That is called call of the void. This is all normal stuff that almost everyone experiences. | {
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4,018 | Kickpuncher VS Punchkicker! | {
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4,019 | Definitely true. I wish I could live forever, not because I fear death or anything, but because I want to see what comes next. I want to know if we'll ever explore the stars, if humanity will ever outgrow it's petty ways and infighting, if we'll ever achieve some kind of metaphysical transcendence. I want to see what's around the next bend in the river of time... | {
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4,020 | I can only draw people with rakes for hands, I am nearly 30. I just cant draw anything at all. My best hopes are that we will evolve into people with rake-hands, making me some sort of prophet and my drawings priceless, securing the financial stability for my family. But for now, I just suck at drawing anything. | {
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4,021 | The owner would exercise his right to bear arms. | {
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4,022 | So was that the first time you met a fellow redditor in real life? | {
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4,023 | This happens in all kinds of situations. I think one of our economic cognitive biases is undervaluing convenience. Sometimes we think we're clever little amateur economists but really our time isn't worth those tiny savings, except the savings are more easily quantifiable than the value of our time.\n\nEDIT: but I guess that's the whole thread, innit. | {
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4,024 | Cats instinctively want to remain hidden for hunting and survival against other predators. Boxes are like the ultimate tall grass. | {
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4,025 | As a woman who always gets fries and has them stolen by my husband who "wasn't hungry enough to order his own," this is something any evil person who doesn't get their own fries will do. \n\nHe also needs to try at least one enormous bite of everything I'm eating and has no sense of ethics when it comes to the dip/chip ratio when sharing guacamole. The man has no scruples. | {
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4,026 | hey, aren't you the guy who couldn't spell his name right on that one thing? | {
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4,027 | It isn't hard to imagine. Try being completely naked in a room full of people who speak a different language and everyone wants to touch you. | {
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4,028 | Yeah, Nintendo likes to do that. | {
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4,029 | It means your ipod only has 7 more days to live. It has icancer. I'm so sorry. | {
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4,030 | I love how little that actor seems to care in those movies | {
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4,031 | I hated when I made [this](http://i.imgur.com/IWPNEjn.jpg) and I had to clear it for a test.\n\nEDIT: [This](http://i.imgur.com/JF4sxI1.jpg) is to the people who say I didn't make it. | {
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4,032 | Then leave, and have the entire crew return moments later and say "Forgot my pen." | {
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4,033 | The invention of the revolving door was truly revolutionary. | {
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4,034 | Remember when I was jerkin' it the other day? I was doing this for you.. | {
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4,035 | This website was setup by your grandfather who needed an excuse to play Pokemon. It was a long con. | {
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4,036 | There we go, AMA done, we have the answer we needed | {
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4,037 | > The first computer to pass the Turing test.\n\nShit, that would be cool. | {
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4,038 | Aww... Here's something to make your /u/mundaneandboring day better. [It's a rabbit.](http://i.imgur.com/3p3Jbmu.jpg) | {
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4,039 | I'd trust this guy, I feel like he gives a shit. | {
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4,040 | http://i.imgur.com/vB9B5.gif | {
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4,041 | http://i.imgur.com/dmAbO.png | {
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4,042 | Knock knock. \n\nWho's there?\n\nEurope.\n\nEurope who?\n\nNo, you're a poo! | {
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4,043 | Always fap before big decisions. | {
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4,044 | "Not enough to keep me where I am. *Next question.*" | {
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4,045 | Would you feel different if the adult was a male and the OP was female? | {
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4,046 | Are fully stocked British warships a problem for you often? | {
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4,047 | Oh! Well, because Channing has his shirt off for part of the film. And because I wear really tight clothes. So for you and your SO, there you have it! \n\nPlus it's kickass, and brilliant, and smart. But for you and your SO... you can go and see Channing half-naked. Yay! | {
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4,048 | The last sentence describes the restaurant industry perfectly. | {
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4,049 | I don't mean to scare you, but I think you may have stayed with the Berenstain bears. | {
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4,050 | I made the mistake of posting in /r/Relationships, and it was nearly unanimous (ONE person was against the rest) that I should leave my SO because she suffers from depression. My question wasn't even whether I should leave her or not... | {
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4,051 | That's me in the corner \nThat's me in the spotlight \nLosing my new vision | {
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4,052 | I love that:\n\n1. There is a grilled cheese subreddit.\n\n2. Someone rage quit from it. | {
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4,053 | ^ Found the professional bowler. | {
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4,054 | Charlie horse during sex = pleasure to agony in zero seconds flat | {
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4,055 | I like the way he switches up his feet each time as if there is some sort of form he's aiming for. | {
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4,056 | When I was a kid an ant crawled in my ear and never came out. I love ants. Long live ants. Kill all humans | {
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4,057 | I hear nothing but complaining that it'll just be Star Wars themed Battlefield. And honestly, I think that would be fun as fuck. | {
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4,058 | I especially hate this at work. \n\n "Are you busy?" \n\nThe answer to that will never be "No." WTF do you want? | {
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4,059 | You're wrong... the best part of the 2015 Grammy awards was the part where I didn't watch any of it. | {
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4,060 | That's when you say "no." | {
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4,061 | Put a note saying "If you unfolded this note: I just wanted to say that I love you, SO" in there. Trust will go up to 100%. | {
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4,062 | I like the one with 1 star\n\n"No Braille version???"\n\n"My infant daughter went blind after contracting measles from an unvaccinated child, and yet there's no braille version of this wonderful book for me to give her someday to explain to her how awesome the disease that took her sight away is." | {
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4,063 | The universe won't let him die, he knows too much. | {
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4,064 | Correct. If I was running this group, now that I know it's possible for one worker to do 1000 records a day, the next logical step would be to raise the quota for each worker or adjust the bonuses. | {
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4,065 | This is the first ad in a long time I've actively liked. Whoever created that is a genius. | {
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4,066 | He has advanced polycythemia. Basically his body makes too many red blood cells and it affects different parts of his body. | {
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4,067 | I used to work at a movie rental store, and my coworker used the word "black" and a (white) lady in line flipped out about how it was racist, and that the term was "African American". Just so happened a black dude was standing in line behind her, so my coworker just looked up and said, "Is saying 'black' instead of 'African American' offensive?" to which the man replied, "I'm from Jamaica, so I find 'African American' offensive..." | {
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4,068 | Not sure if the rapist locator, or therapist locator... | {
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4,069 | He was in a hurry to go out and create jobs. | {
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4,070 | *A thought strikes your mind. You look at the screen. 'Gold,' you utter. 'This place is a fucking mine.' A few moments later, you see a golden badge on your post. Something is wrong. This is not how mines work. Normally, you find gold. This time, gold finds you. You stare oddly at the little yellow badge on your comment and go on browsing the comments.* | {
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4,071 | Australian here. Textbook says "G'day, Mitochondria is like the powerhouse of the cell, mate." | {
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4,072 | I think the Dungeons and Dragons episode in season 2. | {
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4,073 | I agree with this, it just makes me paranoid and overanalyze things. | {
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4,074 | Its all about reaction time. If you respond to her rebuttal with another "Shut the fuck up", you may be lucky enough to stay in a hotel for a few nights where you can do whatever you please. | {
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4,075 | Tommy Wiseau everyone | {
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4,076 | so they are trying to turn it off and back on again? | {
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4,077 | I always say “ sex good, man satisfied” | {
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4,078 | Also, I'm pregnant.... no, sorry, I mean we are out of milk. | {
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4,079 | Can't blame the girl for being cold. | {
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4,080 | You should probably try installing a new driver | {
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4,081 | I know. Someone give that poor kid an Xbox. | {
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4,082 | Gonna stick my beef log right where you poo. | {
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4,083 | "I'm sorry Dale, we're letting you go. Please turn in your badge." \n\n"I suppose you'll be wanting my gun, too." \n\n"I'm sorry what?" | {
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4,084 | I find this rather cruel, but maybe you and your family just have a different sense of humor. | {
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4,085 | Here at Reddit we offer a great variety of high-quality, low-quality services! | {
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4,086 | Not if we only live there at night time. | {
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4,087 | Hey I'm not ugly. I'm just aesthetically challenged. | {
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4,088 | Sweet, my first gold! Here, have some gold for giving me gold! | {
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4,089 | I liked tangled better than frozen. I said it. | {
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4,090 | Why did I read this comment?! | {
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4,091 | Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was America! | {
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4,092 | I'm on mobile, what's the best way to upload ? | {
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4,093 | The Core is hilariously bad, but 2012 doesn't even try. | {
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4,094 | Your mom's apparently a moron. | {
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4,095 | I want them to be in a movie together. Javier B is dating Katy Perry and JDM is dating Zoe Deschanel. They independently travel to a small island resort and end up in adjoining villas. An event occurs causing everyone's vision to blur slightly and shenanigans ensue. | {
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4,096 | And of all the things to make an issue, who got their check first? WTF? Blatantly an excuse not to tip. | {
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4,097 | yo pewds what is your grahix card and can u ad me on steam???? | {
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4,098 | Tosh would destroy me. Also, because 15 frat guys would see him beating me up and join in. | {
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4,099 | Everyone knows the best place to pork is in a catholic girls school at 3 AM. | {
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