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Dataset card Data Studio Files
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"Soooo my 4 year old nephew just told me this. He's a little nerd but it made me chuckle. Knock knock..."
Jokes
"It’s very rare that a defibrillator fails."
Jokes
"Man, on a first date: How do you feel about sex? Woman: I like it infrequently."
Jokes
"Why was the anti-vaxxer’s 3 year old crying?"
Jokes
"Last night my girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed…"
Jokes
"What is a pirate's LEAST favorite letter?"
Jokes
"An Englishman and an Irishman go to a bakery. The Englishman steals three buns and puts them into his pockets and leaves. He says to the Irishman: “That took great skill and guile to steal those buns. The owner didn’t even see me.”"
Jokes
"I was blessed with a 9 inch penis."
Jokes
"What do you call children born in whorehouses?"
Jokes
"A husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their 9 children."
Jokes
"Trump said..."
Jokes
"How many Texas cops does it take to save children from an active shooter?"
Jokes
"I like my women like I like my whiskey."
Jokes
"Told my wife I was so stressed that only a blowjob would help."
Jokes
"A girl tells her mother after school ‘Mum, I got a gold star today for reciting the whole alphabet! The rest of my class only knows 3 or 4 letters!"
Jokes
"I was complaining to my wife about our nonexistent sex life."
Jokes
"A mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl as a roommate."
Jokes
"In breaking news, Trump’s personal library has burned down."
Jokes
"A‌‌n America‌‌n soldier‌‌, servin‌‌g i‌‌n Worl‌‌d Wa‌‌r I‌‌I ha‌‌d jus‌‌t returne‌‌d fro‌‌m severa‌‌l week‌‌s o‌‌f battl‌‌e o‌‌n th‌‌e Germa‌‌n fron‌‌t lines."
Jokes
"A man who just died is delivered to the mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit..."
Jokes
"A man is walking through a graveyard when he sees another man squatting next to a grave. "Morning!" he calls out."
Jokes
"The only thing Flat-Earthers fear"
Jokes
"An engineer dies and goes to hell."
Jokes
"How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb?"
Jokes
"My girlfriend is mad because I could only last 2 minutes in bed"
Jokes
"Weinstein didn’t kill himself"
Jokes
"Got home to find my wife had left a note on the fridge that said "This isn't working I'm going to my mum's""
Jokes
"Man wakes up in a slum with no memory of how he got there."
Jokes
"Jared from Subway ended his career the same way he began it"
Jokes
"A teacher goes for a long walk on the beach. She finds a shiny magic lamb, picks it up, and rubs it."
Jokes
"My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them..."
Jokes
"eBay is so useless"
Jokes
"If someone calls you Fat, just ignore them."
Jokes
"A man’s walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. “Twenty bucks,” she says. He’s never been with a prostitute before, but he decides what the hell."
Jokes
"Why haven't Aliens visited our Solar System yet? ..."
Jokes
"Why are circumsized penises so popular among Jewish girls?"
Jokes
"When I was 5 years old, I got a coal from Santa..."
Jokes
"If I had a dollar for everytime someone over 40 told me my generation sucks...."
Jokes
"What did the Reddit user say after setting off a bomb in a bank?"
Jokes
"While in China, an American man is sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there."
Jokes
"A Jewish man decides his son isn't religious enough, so pays for him to go visit Israel."
Jokes
"Wife: Does this dress make me look fat? Me: You promise not to get mad no matter what i say? Wife: Yes"
Jokes
"Did you know if you hold your ear up too a strangers leg"
Jokes
"I asked my masseuse if it was normal to get an erection during my massage"
Jokes
"Smartest president"
Jokes
"Did you know that a piranha can devour a human child to the bone in 30 seconds?"
Jokes
"What do you get if you cross a pirate and a paedophile?"
Jokes
"A college professor started to notice that one of his students, Dave, started gaining lots of female attention."
Jokes
"Jesu‌‌s onc‌‌e sai‌‌d "H‌‌e wh‌‌o live‌‌s b‌‌y th‌‌e sword‌‌, wil‌‌l di‌‌e b‌‌y th‌‌e sword""
Jokes
"Give a man a gun and he'll rob a bank,"
Jokes
"A man sunbathes in the nude and ends up burning his penis"
Jokes
"I can count on one hand how many times I have been to Chernobyl."
Jokes
"A Nazi walks into a bar..."
Jokes
"11 Minutes"
Jokes
"A KGB agent goes to a library and sees an old Jewish man reading a book."
Jokes
"A drunk guy is showing friends his new apartment..."
Jokes
"My wife screamed in pain during labor so I asked, “What’s wrong?”. She screamed. “These contractions are going to kill me!”"
Jokes
"I hate that SEPTember, OCTober, NOVember, and DECember aren't the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months......"
Jokes
"What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?"
Jokes
"I just read a list of “100 Things To Do Before You Die”..."
Jokes
"If I'm ever on life support, unplug me..."
Jokes
"The new sex position is called Brexit:"
Jokes
"What I if told you"
Jokes
"I can’t believe that you’ve been visiting prostitutes for sex,” my wife screamed at me."
Jokes
"We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks."
Jokes
"I didn’t know what to wear to my premature ejaculation support group"
Jokes
"A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?""
Jokes
"Once upon a time there lived a ravishing Queen with huge tits.."
Jokes
"Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago , another is from Tennessee , and the third is from Minnesota ."
Jokes
"I got so fed up with the trick-or-treaters last Halloween that I turned off the lights and pretended I wasn't home."
Jokes
"In Britain, when you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen."
Jokes
"If you find gold in Australia where should you look for silver?"
Jokes
"Why was 6 afraid of 7?"
Jokes
"I scared the postman today by going to the door completely naked…"
Jokes
" My wife FINALLY agreed to a Star Wars role play in the bedroom..."
Jokes
"A wife is tired of all the problems that need fixing in her house"
Jokes
"r/Jokes Has 19 Million subscribers!"
Jokes
"What's the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon?"
Jokes
"This joke got me fired when I worked as a cook. Credit goes to Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling"
Jokes
"It is really unfortunate that Islam, Christianity, and Judaism have been fighting each other for centuries."
Jokes
"A reporter walks into a bar"
Jokes
"Best knock knock joke ever.."
Jokes
"Got my girlfriend a "get better soon" card"
Jokes
"A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work..."
Jokes
"A girl asks her boyfriend to come over for dinner"
Jokes
"How does a Flat Earther travel the world?"
Jokes
"A perfectly triangular lake has 3 kingdoms on its 3 sides"
Jokes
"How did Metallica get people to stop pirating their music?"
Jokes
"A lesbian named Linda went to the beach. She unrolled her towel, removed her clothes, and lay down in her bikini. She looked to her left and saw an absolute knockout of a woman lying on her towel, reading a novel."
Jokes
"Superman is out flying and sees wonder woman naked on a rooftop with her legs wide open and moaning in delight"
Jokes
"A Nazi walks into a bar"
Jokes
"Today, I shocked the hell out of the postman by opening the door completely naked."
Jokes
"I'm a 5G installation engineer and people are constantly accusing me with bizarre conspiracy theories, such as how 5G is giving them headaches, or killing their sperm. I think they are completely crazy."
Jokes
"What's the difference between a rimshot and a rimjob?"
Jokes
"I think, I'm going to lose my drivers license..."
Jokes
"We were having sex the other night and to my surprise my wife started punching me in the face."
Jokes
"My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon 5 years ago, but still has not been awarded a gold medal."
Jokes
"The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them "Scraps". They started crying. Spoiled brats, it's really hard to get food at the moment thanks to the panic buying."
Jokes
"A Hindu, a Rabbi, and a Jehovah's Witness are lost.."
Jokes
"A sixth grade teacher asks her class how many were Trump fans."
Jokes