title
stringlengths 2
302
| label
stringlengths 3
20
|
|---|---|
"There’s a stranger out there who probably has a memory that involves you in it that they think about from time to time." | Showerthoughts |
"A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who knows you." | Showerthoughts |
"As a kid a wiggling tooth is exciting. As an adult a wiggling tooth is terrifying." | Showerthoughts |
"Apple treats you like a user, Android treats you like an admin." | Showerthoughts |
"Every child deserves parents, but not all parents deserve children." | Showerthoughts |
"Women’s longer average lifespan is partially cancelled out by longer wait times at public restrooms." | Showerthoughts |
"Self checkouts are saving thousands of teenagers from the embarrassment of their first condom purchases." | Showerthoughts |
"In video games the fatter the enemy, the more HP they have. In real life it's the opposite." | Showerthoughts |
"Infinite scrolling makes addiction to social media 1000 times worse." | Showerthoughts |
"People who post pictures of restaurant menus on Yelp when you can't find them anywhere else are the real MVPs." | Showerthoughts |
"Aquaman's skin is impenetrable by normal blades, bullets and more... Which makes you wonder how he got his tattoos in the 2018 movie" | Showerthoughts |
"Youtubers who specialize on "reaction videos" exist to fulfill our fantasy of showing a video to a friend and them reacting like we want them to." | Showerthoughts |
"Amputating Mike Wazowski’s legs would be exactly the same as beheading him." | Showerthoughts |
"Looney Toons doesn’t get enough credit for introducing countless children to classical music" | Showerthoughts |
"There are probably a bunch of parents who think their children are fussy eaters, when in reality they're just horrible cooks." | Showerthoughts |
"If you put a map of your country on the floor, there will be a point on the map that is touching the actual point it refers to" | Showerthoughts |
"Crispy is just crunchy but thin." | Showerthoughts |
"Considering how new $1000 phones are released every year with minor changes, it's a good thing gaming consoles don't do the exact same thing." | Showerthoughts |
"The international space station takes the smartest people on the planet and turns them into maintenance workers" | Showerthoughts |
"When you think about it, Shakespeare WAS the result of billions of monkeys trying to write stuff randomly for millions of years." | Showerthoughts |
"Bill Murray's character was lucky he got a good night's sleep the night before Groundhog Day, otherwise he'd have been exhausted the entire time he was stuck in the time loop" | Showerthoughts |
"The larger the download button, the less safe it seems" | Showerthoughts |
"Somewhere in the world there is one penguin who is the most gnarly, hardcore, badass penguin living by penguin standards and to us it just looks like another chubby little bird." | Showerthoughts |
"The rich used to pay peasants to entertain them and now the peasants pay the rich to entertain them." | Showerthoughts |
"Rattlesnakes making a noise to scare us away before biting us is actually super chill on the snake's part. Rattlesnakes are the good guys of the venomous world." | Showerthoughts |
"Future generations will have lots of high quality video footage of so many extinct animals." | Showerthoughts |
"If a sequel to a movie doesn’t have the screenwriters or directors of the first movie in it, it’s basically just a high-budget fanfiction" | Showerthoughts |
"Being a pet owner is like being a sugar daddy. You waste all of your money on keeping them happy, and the only thing they do is look cute and give you attention sometimes." | Showerthoughts |
"If penis size was as obvious as breast size the world would be a very different place." | Showerthoughts |
"If we do colonize Mars, the reduced gravity will cause humans to be physically weaker, so we will probably use Martian as an insult synonymous with weakling." | Showerthoughts |
"You have the same amount of gold medals as almost every one who’s been in the Olympics" | Showerthoughts |
"There's an NPC in a game somewhere still waiting on you to finish that side quest you forgot about that would change their life." | Showerthoughts |
"Taking into consideration how big the universe is there has to be a penis shaped asteroid just floating around somewhere in space" | Showerthoughts |
"8 hours of drinking is binge drinking, 8 hours of TV is binge watching, 8 hours of sleep is barely enough" | Showerthoughts |
"If Apple manufactured clothing they'd probably have all the belt loops on their jeans a different size than normal, so you'd also have to buy an Apple Belt." | Showerthoughts |
"If we colonize Mars and bring chicken with us , then they would have the ability to actually fly since mars gravity is about 38% earth's gravity." | Showerthoughts |
"It only takes one slow-walking person in the grocery store to destroy the illusion that you're a nice person." | Showerthoughts |
"The job of future historians will be the exact opposite of what it is now. From too little information to too much information. Filtering out what was real and what fake." | Showerthoughts |
"If reincarnation is real, then maybe flies and other bugs are purposely annoying because they want to get killed and get reincarnated as something better" | Showerthoughts |
"Given how often your character dies in video games, in most timelines, the bad guys win." | Showerthoughts |
"There's a neverending waterfall of poo hidden inside every skyscraper" | Showerthoughts |
"Girls are so used to compliments that insults stick out to them. Guys are so used to insults that compliments stick out to him." | Showerthoughts |
"Eating lunch alone as a kid is like torture, getting to eat lunch alone as an adult is a nice treat." | Showerthoughts |
"A gold fish's job is to introduce kids to dying" | Showerthoughts |
"A child eating a cake in the middle of the night is having a great time. An adult eating a cake in the middle of the night is having a terrible time." | Showerthoughts |
"The first parents to let their kids cook in front of Gordon Ramsey, before any of us knew that he is actually really nice and patient with young chefs, must have really hated their kid" | Showerthoughts |
"Having one bar of wifi is worse than having no wifi at all" | Showerthoughts |
"If lab-grown meat becomes the norm, our children and grandchildren will probably think we're monsters for killing and eating animals" | Showerthoughts |
"If I see Google in a show/movie I think nothing of it, but if I see Bing, I know it's product placement." | Showerthoughts |
"“Lazytown” was a show in which the protagonists promoted health and criticized unhealthy behavior, such as being on the internet all the time. Now the antagonist of the show is an icon to those who browse the internet all day" | Showerthoughts |
"In Despicable Me, the entrance to the villain bank is in the middle of three urinals, which makes sense because no sane person would use the middle urinal to avoid being right next to someone while peeing. Plus only a villain would use the middle urinal to create the chaos anyway." | Showerthoughts |
"The fact that a blood red lunar eclipse is happening only a week after they opened that black sarcophagus in Egypt is kinda unsettling." | Showerthoughts |
"When you choke on water, you’ve failed at breathing and drinking, the two most important activities in your life." | Showerthoughts |
"If a company celebrates 365 days accident free, then they're celebrating the anniversary of the accident." | Showerthoughts |
"If you run at 11pm you are a night person. If you run at 5am you are a morning person. If you run at 3am you are a suspicious person." | Showerthoughts |
"The only part of your reflection you can lick is your tongue." | Showerthoughts |
"If people stranded on deserted islands don’t clean up their ‘HELP’ signs before they leave rescuers would spend hours looking for someone who isn’t there" | Showerthoughts |
"People who say not to talk to them before their morning coffee are basically saying that they're unpleasant to be around when they're not under the influence of drugs" | Showerthoughts |
"If aliens are monitoring our media and 98% of the internet is porn...They're not giving us anal probes; they're just trying to speak the language." | Showerthoughts |
"In “Never Gonna Give You Up”, he never says he loves her or that he’ll treat her well, only that he will be committed to her and not cheat on her. He even goes so far as to say, “you wouldn’t get this from any other guy”. That song isn’t a love song, it’s the “nice guy” anthem." | Showerthoughts |
"Since people only kill the spiders they see, humans are acting as an agent of natural selection, causing spiders to be selected for reclusion and intelligence. We are making spiders smarter." | Showerthoughts |
"The reason why shows like Friends and The Office are so beloved is because they show us what we truly want in life - a tight knit social group that we're always a part of, no matter how bad we screw up." | Showerthoughts |
"There is a certain point in everyone's life where "How high can you count?" changes from a matter of knowledge to a matter of will." | Showerthoughts |
"For every girl who wonders if a guy is staring at her, there is a guy who accidentally makes eye contact and is now afraid that she thinks he was staring at her." | Showerthoughts |
"Airports should have small movie theaters for layovers. They would make a killing." | Showerthoughts |
"When a starving predator is chasing prey they are both running for their lives." | Showerthoughts |
"The internet has gotten dumber over time because it took stupid people longer to figure out how to use it." | Showerthoughts |
"Our buttholes are watertight. We can go swimming, get water in our ears, nose, and mouth, our butts however, no water. Amazing!" | Showerthoughts |
"smelling your own fart puts that fart back inside of you" | Showerthoughts |
"When you introduce two different groups of friends to each other, it's like your own life's crossover episode." | Showerthoughts |
"The number of guys that sit when they pee must have exploded when smartphones came out" | Showerthoughts |
"Having kids is like having little broke bestfriends that think you're rich" | Showerthoughts |
"The only people forced to see anti-piracy warnings are the people who don't pirate movies." | Showerthoughts |
"It’s weird to think that nighttime is the natural state of the universe, and that daytime is only caused by a nearby, radiating ball of flame" | Showerthoughts |
"Few things are sadder than leaving the vet's with an empty pet carrier." | Showerthoughts |
"There’s probably a guy out there that thinks he has a strong pullout game when in reality he is not capable of making children." | Showerthoughts |
"As a kid, a friend living 15 minutes was really far away. As an adult, a friend living 15 minutes away is really close." | Showerthoughts |
"I'm lucky to be broke at a time when minimalism and sustainability are in style." | Showerthoughts |
"A guy can decline an invitation by saying his girlfriend won't let him go and everyone will likely understand. But if a girl declines an invitation by saying her boyfriend won't let her go, people will likely get concerned." | Showerthoughts |
"Teenage girls probably dress and try to look older because they want to look like teenage girls in movies who are probably mid 20s actresses" | Showerthoughts |
"Shrek says “hold the phone” even though telecommunication does not seem apparent within the Shrek universe." | Showerthoughts |
""Based on a true story" movies are all part of the same series." | Showerthoughts |
"Parents who say, "If you're feeling well enough to play video games, you're feeling well enough to go to school!" don't seem to realize they are equating an extremely low impact leisure activity with a high stress and difficult involuntary obligation." | Showerthoughts |
"With how many streaming services there are it won’t be long before someone bundles them all together and we end up with Cable TV again." | Showerthoughts |
"One day the Lord of the Rings trilogy will be remade and we’ll all hate it" | Showerthoughts |
"Witch hunting wouldn't have been so popular in medieval times if any of the victims were actual witches and had decided to fight back" | Showerthoughts |
"Wet clothes feel twice as nasty if you have to take them off and put them back on again" | Showerthoughts |
"Rockstar has really proven with their popular games GTA V and Red Dead Redemption 2 that we have never really outgrown playing cops and robbers or cowboys and Indians" | Showerthoughts |
"If stress ruins meat, then most humans must taste like garbage." | Showerthoughts |
"All that time they spent teaching us cursive, they could've spent teaching sign language instead" | Showerthoughts |
"Honestly the least realistic part about the Magic School Bus is that a public school has a class size of 8." | Showerthoughts |
"A clear toothpaste tube would make so much sense." | Showerthoughts |
""Middle of the night water" tastes so much better than normal water" | Showerthoughts |
"The main child actors in Harry Potter were tutored on set so they theoretically went to school at Hogwarts" | Showerthoughts |
"Signing contracts with blood actually makes sense. A written signature can be forged or ambiguous, but the DNA test will always show whose signature it is." | Showerthoughts |
"The movie "Free Willy" is about freeing a captive Orca while using a captive Orca to play the Orca they're trying to free from captivity." | Showerthoughts |
"We really take for granted that both our legs grow at the same time and at the same rate." | Showerthoughts |
"Star-Lord from the Guardians of the Galaxy movies probably still thinks Santa is real. He was taken from Earth as a kid and then raised in space around aliens and crazy creatures the rest of his life. He probably assumes Santa is an alien." | Showerthoughts |
"The Onion might go bankrupt because they can't compete against the reality now" | Showerthoughts |
"People often forget that there was a time before glasses, which explains many historical myths and legends." | Showerthoughts |
Subsets and Splits
No community queries yet
The top public SQL queries from the community will appear here once available.