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t3_2cvmnt | cats | Need Advice: cat bites unprovoked | Hey everyone,
Thanks for opening this thread and reading. I have a one and a half year old rescue cat who I got at around 8 weeks old. He has severe heart murmurs but it hasn't been apparent and hasn't affected his life just yet. He has never been a lap cat and isn't into too much petting (over stimulation?)
So for the past few months he has been crawling into bed in the morning and lays there relaxing. Some days I pet him for 10 minutes and he loves it, and some days I try petting him for 5 seconds and he tries to bite me. When I pull my hand away and put it aside to show him I've stopped, he stares at my hand and then lunges at it and bites it. At that point I push him off the bed. Also on the rare occasion he will try to nip my leg if I am standing nearby. That rarely happens but it has happened often enough for me to wonder why. Can anyone help me explain why my cat is doing this? | my cat bites me unprovoked, why does he do that?? |
t3_rmge4 | AskReddit | Reddit, what is the stupidest thing a roommate ever said/did to you? | Back story: when I was still in college, I had a roommate (lets call him Dom-The-Dick) who always try to hang out with my friends and I, but none of us really liked him. This was because he was quite arrogant, narcissistic, and had a really annoying voice.
So one day The Dick finds out that I recently purchased some ping pong balls and paddles. I normally would play a few rounds with my friends, but this day we decided to watch a movie around the normal time we played. So The Dick asks if he can use the ping pong equipment. Reluctantly I agree, because having him use the equipment is by *far* better than him watching a movie with us. I believe all is well.
Fast forward to later that night. I come back to my room to find that out of the 3 paddles that I had bought, the one which I was saving for a practical joke (I glued a ping-pong ball to one side of it,) had been torn off. There were two *other* perfectly good ones for The Dick to use, yet he chose to destroy the one that wasn't usable. I asked him "why did you rip the ball off of this paddle? I was saving it for a joke to use on my brother." His response "Well I couldn't use it, so I took the ball off. Someone glued it on." Even after I explained the reason behind the glue, and I asked him to just apologize and take responsibility, he **FREAKED OUT** and ran out of the room. | I've never wanted to stomp on a dick so much in my life. |
t3_35xqco | tifu | TIFU by making a casual cancer reference in front of one of the company directors | Happened about 5 minutes ago and don't really fancy having this on my main account.
I work at a fairly small consultancy and I'm sat at a desk next to one of the directors when he chuckles at computer shaking his head. I ask him what's up, and he replies, "It's ridiculous that on LinkedIn, you can enter a project end date as far in the future as 2065 - I'll be nearly 90 by then!". I swiftly responded with "yeah that is pretty crazy...unless you were like, working for [Cancer Research] or something". The exchange ended there.
It was a pretty poor response in any case, but the fact that his wife died of cancer last year made it 100x worse. He's gone to get lunch. | Made a light-hearted reference to cancer to one of the directors at work; his wife died of cancer last year. |
t3_v9n4i | BreakUps | Is my ex justified in being upset with me? | So I've been having out and become best friends with my ex's roommate. They have never been friends, they just work (not for long) and live together (not for long). After my ex and I broke up, his roommate and I became good friends - we were going through similar situations, have the same life views, same religious beliefs, etc.
However, we got drunk and things happened a few times. Of course, through the grapevine my ex found out (which I figured would happen, but people love gossip). Anyway, my ex is m26, me f25, and my best friend (roommate - is m26, going to be 27).
I imagined my ex wouldn't be happy about it - but he's the one who ended things, and he and his rommie aren't friends. I know way more about his life and what's been going on with him than my ex.
I can understand why my ex wouldn't be happy about it....but we had a discussion before anything happened that I was free to do what I wanted, and that I wasn't going to wait around for him to change his mind.
I feel terrible that it's somebody he knows (and unfortunately has to live with for about another month or so)....but once you break up, isn't that it? After the drunken night happened, the rommie and I agreed that it was a mistake and probably shouldn't let it happen again for numerous reasons.
However, since my ex has "found out" - and I use quotations because he won't discuss it with the roomie or myself - he has completely deleted me from Facebook, instagram, twitter, etc. A bit juvenile if you ask me.
I understand that what I did wasn't exactly the best decision, and I do feel bad about it. However, is he blowing things out of proportion or am I just completely in the wrong. Like I said, the roommate and I are MUCH better friends (best friends actually) than he and the ex have ever been, but I can understand why it's weird and why the ex might be a little upset. | drunkenly made out with ex's roommate (who's not friends with the ex - they just live together, and I had been given the OK to move on by the ex), and mutual friends hinted to the ex that things have happened between us. The roommate and I are just friends now, but the ex has now completely cut both of us out of his life. I feel bad, but should I feel worse or is he blowing things out of proportion? |
t3_xgn1p | AskReddit | Reddit! Need a clever, yet subtle way, to get back at family members. Help? | I'm currently residing with my parents. I'm 16 so i don't have access to cars, lots of funds etc. My younger sibling has always been the favourite one and i've come to live with this fact. However, whenever he does something wrong, blame is always passed along, one way or another, to me. This isn't teenage angst or whatever explanations that you'll try and come up with. I'm not jealous of the attention and love being given. I've recently recorded previous arguments and 95% of them, the blame is passed to me. I need some way to get back at my family members which isn't direct confrontation as that has been proven not to work. Any ideas Reddit? | Need subtle way to get back at family members. |
t3_33goh2 | tifu | TIFU by being the luckiest man alive | Went to a local business award dinner with my wife and a friend.
It was in the evening at a hotel in a downtown area. We get to the hotel, and go into the parking garage. We're about 30min late at this point. It's packed. We get to the top floor of the garage and realize there's no more open spaces. As we're backing down, we see one and zip in.
As we park we see another mutual friend, we jump out of the car to say hi. We grab our stuff and head downstairs to the event.
After the event we walk to a local bar to chat a bit more with another mutual friend. After a few minutes we decide to leave. The bar is a bit of a walk, and the ladies are in uncomfortable heels so they ask me to get the car from the hotel and pick them up.
After I pay for the drinks, I realize I don't have the car key. Odd. I assume I gave it to my wife. She disagrees. We check her purse. No keys.
We assume they fell out at some point, and start to retrace our steps.
My wife and our friend go to the front desk and tell them we lost our keys. I split up and head to where the event was. It's all locked up. Fuck.
Ok, so I decide to at least see if the car is still there... It's a newish Mercedes C300, so if somebody saw that key on the floor it's pretty tempting to just take the car as opposed to turn in the key.
I take the elevator to the floor we parked on, and open the door to the garage. It's getting late so there are almost no cars remaining. I turn a corner to get to where we parked and I see the car is still there. Oh man. Light are on. I get closer. It's running. I get closer, it's unlocked.
I text my wife a picture of the car with the caption. "If you want a divorce, I totally understand." | I left my Mercedes unlocked and running in a downtown parking garage for several hours, and it was still there when I got back. |
t3_1bn4hw | relationships | How do I (18M) deal with finding out that my girlfriend (18F) started cutting again after 8 months? | So, when my girlfriend (let's call her M) and I started dating, she cut once due to depression issues and I saw it. M said that she would never do it again because of how hurt I was by it. Fast forward a few months and M and I are using the L word. Also, M constantly makes reference about how I "saved her from herself."
Last night (we have now been dating for 8 months) we were talking on the phone. Things have been a little rocky lately due to M having depression issues again. While on the phone, I tried helping her out and we started having a breakthrough and she tells me that she just cut herself while on the phone with me. I was devastated and told her that I was disappointed in her. M started freaking out saying that she was sorry and she didn't want to lose me and I told her that I needed time to think. So I am asking you r/relationships, what do I do?? | SO was cutting due to depression. I somehow helped her stop. Last night, she told me that she cut again (due to depression once more). What do I do? |
t3_jnm1o | AskReddit | How do I tell my father that my boyfriend that he doesn't know I have is moving in with me? | Due to location, this conversation will occur via phone.
I haven't seen my father in a year and I have been in a relationship for that same amount of time. When I started dating my now boyfriend, I casually mentioned that to my father that I was dating someone. That was the extent of our discussing the topic and one that has not been breached since then (one year ago) My father can be both verbally and emotionally abusive and we don't frequently talk.
Now, my current roommate is moving out next week (this was sprung upon me without time to prepare) and my boyfriend and I decided it would be awesome if he moved in with me. The thing is, my father is controlling and his name is on the lease. As such, he has stipulated that he wants to interview (telephonically) all my potential roommate applicants. He *will* find out who I am living with, so nondisclosure isn't an option.
Any advice or suggestions on how to go about this and tell the joyful news to daddy dearest?
Oh, I am twenty-one and female if that helps.
Thanks for any and all advice! | See title. |
t3_185507 | relationship_advice | [25/m] I Can't stop thinking about another girl [25/f] even after getting engaged [25/f] | I have been with my current SO for 7 years and everything is great. We have lived together for the past 2 years and recently got engaged. We love to hang out and never fight. I love her very much.
Before I met her, I was in love with someone else. It may sound cliche but, not knowing it at the time, I have pretty much been in love with this girl since 1st grade. When I was younger I didn't try to date anyone because I knew that one day I would just marry her. When I was about to graduate high school I realized she had zero interest in me (I was a geek, she became prom queen) and this was not going to happen and started dating the next person who showed any interest in me (my now SO).
I hoped that eventually I would get over this other women but even after 7 years with my current SO, I still think about this other girl every day and dream about her almost every night. How can I get over her? Should I just tell her, get shot down (which I am still 95% sure would happen) and then feel better? Just continue to wait it out? Any advice or past experience would be appreciated. | I have a SO for 7 years, still think about another girl, how can I get over her? |
t3_2nfnfi | relationships | Me (24f) with my employer (56f)- invited me to thanksgiving, I haven't come out to them yet, and don't know how to decline. | So I've been working for this family for about 5 months. Nicest people in the universe. I work in their home about 40 hours a week with their special needs daughter. They are often home when I am there and I've formed a pretty good relationship with them. This is my favorite, and best paying job I've ever had.
So I am new to the area that we all live (TN) and I don't know many people. I do have a gf of two years and we plan to spend thanksgiving together because it's her birthday. Since i don't know many people, and because I'm new to the area and they are the sweetest people ever, they invited me to their thanksgiving dinner. When they first asked I kind of just froze and said maybe because I didn't know what else to say.
I need to know how to politely decline their invitation. I got asked for a second time yesterday by them and I still said I don't know yet. I feel really rude for doing this even though it will be a large crowd and it probably wouldn't be any more work or accommodating for me to come.
How do I decline without coming out, and without making up a huge lie? | employer doesn't know I'm gay, invited me to thanksgiving with her family, I need a polite way to decline without coming out to them (not ready yet). |
t3_1iku1m | relationships | My Indian girlfriend's [F/26] parents really seem to loathe me [M/25/Latino], I would appreciate some perspective from any Indian folks here. | I [M/25] have been with my current partner [F/26] for about a year and a half now, and we have been talking seriously about marriage, but her parents really seem to hate the fact that I'm not Indian. I've met her folks a few times, and her mom and dad put on a smile and friendly face the first few times, then told her privately that she wouldn't be happy with me, and that she was being incredibly selfish for even dating me. The last time I saw them, I was invited up for a wedding. Her mom didn't speak to me the entire weekend. It wasn't that she avoided me - she would come up to my girlfriend and I, speak to her, and leave, without addressing me or even looking at me.
Things are getting worse rapidly. My grandparents are from South America, and my grandfather died last month. My parents and I really want to spend Christmas this year with my grandmother, as her health is failing as well. I invited my girlfriend to come on the trip with us, as this may be the only time she could ever meet my grandmother, and she was ecstatic to come. My parents also offered to send us on a short trip to Machu Picchu while we are there. My girlfriend, excited to come, asked her parents about it - what she proposed was us going to her parents house for 5 days, then flying to South America for 5 days to split the holidays. Her mother told her that she was "not allowed" to go, and that if she went with me then we should not come to her house at all.
Like I said earlier, we have been discussing engagement/marriage for a little bit now. When she brought that up with her parents, they said that we could "get engaged without them."
Can anyone provide some perspective here? Is this normal behavior? Should we expect her parents to eventually come around? How can I best support her through this? | Her parents hate me because I'm not Indian, they are threatening to cease contact if she continues the relationship. |
t3_454okk | tifu | TIFU by drinking too much coffee | (Actually, this happened yesterday) I used to be a heavy coffee drinker--had three venti cups of black iced coffee from Starbucks every day. Having not drunken coffee for two months, I decided I wanted to correct my sleep schedule so I drank three venti cups of coffee and after the second cup my heart started beating rapidly. The whole night I was unable to sleep, despite having pulled an all-nighter the night before. The next morning (today) I began feeling like I was having a heart attack (and that I was gonna die), and had much difficulty breathing, so I went to the hospital. The doctor told me that I was perfectly healthy, and that based on what I told her about my previous coffee-drinking habits, this could be why I was having difficulty breathing. Right now, I'm still having minor symptoms, but they are much less severe. | Drank too much coffee, got an anxiety attack, I'm fine now. |
t3_o18bv | AskReddit | Whats the worst thing you've done in a public bathroom(Bonus marks: what do you reach for when theres no toilet paper)? | At an undisclosed location about 20mins ago i went to the loo for a poo. Having got 90% through a satisfying anal evacuation i turn around to notice,to my horror there is no loo roll. Not being satisfied with using a sock i reach for the card centre of the finished roll. I tear it in two pieces and wipe each side of my buttocks with it, i then proceed to throw it in the loo and flush. It doesnt go down it just floats on top. i reach my hand into the loo and grab the card tightly covering my hands in poo i then put the card in the bin washed my hands and left. | wiped arse with card. |
t3_12zwm9 | relationship_advice | "It's none of your business" | 19F here. I've been dating my boyfriend (20) for almost three years now. Lately if he tells me he has to go somewhere, I'll ask him where, he'll say "it's none of your business". Or just in general, he'll tell me he has to do something, and when I ask about it, he'll tell me it's none of my business. This bugs me a little, but am I wrong for being bothered? I don't understand why he'd tell me he has to do something and then tell me to mind my own business when I ask about it. Nothing too big, not much of a deal breaker, just wanted to know if I'm wrong or over-exaggerating for being bothered by it. | Boyfriend tells me to mind my own business after he tells me he has to do something and I ask about it. Am I wrong for being bothered by this? |
t3_3m6nim | relationships | Me [22M] with my housemates[various M/F] of 2 months potentially causing problems | Now ive have know my housemates for two years i lived with 2 of them last year and 2 new ones this year, so theres 5 of us, and we are having house party later that im quite happy to have provided that certain people dont turn up.
My problem is that my housemates went out last night with those people and could have told them about our party and they decide to turn up, well im not gonna be happy to put it nicely.
What i would like is some tips on how to deal with this should it happen, what would be the best course of action for me to take? | Having houseparty, people that aren't invited might turn up, need advice of what to do should this happen |
t3_4y4qng | tifu | TIFU by accidentally waterboarding myself | As a Reddit creep for most of the time, I've come to frequent SkincareAddiction.
It's been a cornerstone in changing my skin for the better; specifically through oil cleansing.
Now, I massage mineral oil all over my face in the morning as a cleanser and hop into the shower with a fresh face cloth to do the rest of the cleaning!
This morning however, after a night where I had to take a sleeping tablet, I was a little more than groggy doing my morning routine.
I'm stood in the shower with the warm wrung out face cloth over my face, and I sway forward a bit.
I sway forward and my face gets put under the running shower head.
Cue panicked breathing and breathe swallowing of water. My arms go out to stop myself slipping whilst my brain tries to redirect them to taking he face cloth off..
I end up on my arse in the shower and completely out of the groggy headedness as I realise what I'd done. | swayed forward in the shower having taken a sleeping tablet the night before and accidentally water boarded myself with a face cloth while oil cleansing. |
t3_1xj6zb | relationships | I [22 F] just go dumped by my boyfriend[23 M] a few weeks before we completed a year. Extremely upset. | We were in an LDR for 11 months. Both of us went away on holiday separately with our families. He is still there but I came back a few weeks ago. That is when he began to ignore me and started to behave distant.
I asked him whats wrong, and all he said was I dont feel like talking. I figured he just needed space so I let him be.
A few days ago he said he can't see a future with me and he wasnt sure if he loved me. He wasnt able to see himself being in a serious relationship.
I am so devastated because I thought he wanted a life with me. Thats what we always talked about. And now he doesnt even want to commit to me.
The first person I have ever loved to pieces broke my heart and left. He pursued me and he told me he loved me first. Then how could he out of the blue tell me its over.
I dont know how to deal with this, I had nervous breakdown and I feel like im going into depression. I feel worthless. | Boyfriend broke up because he couldnt see me in his future. I am devastated and unsure how to handle this. |
t3_3e3p72 | tifu | TIFU by letting my 6 year old daughter go into a public bathroom at Dunkin Donuts, unsupervised.. | We go into Dunkin Donuts because she needs to use the restroom. I tell her to make sure she pushes in the little push lock on the handle even though I waited right outside the door. She goes in, does her thing, comes back out all super excited and says, "LOOK! I found money!!" I look, and she's got a dollar bill in her hand. I was like, "nice, good eyes"... then I look down at her again and realize it wasn't just a dollar bill that someone accidentally dropped. It was somebody's drug straw. My daughter's standing there trying to unroll it from straw form. All I could picture was a big poof of coke going right in her face as she finishes unrolling it. So I had to quickly snatch it out of her hands like some kind of money hungry asshole, before my 6 year old ended up with some unknown, powdered drug all over herself. She looked at me with this "what the fuck" face, full of shock and confusion. All I could say was that I'd give her a different dollar bill when we got home. She still probably just thinks im a greedy piece of shit. | my kid found a dollar bill in a public bathroom that had been up someone's nose. I had to take it from her in case there were still any drug remnants on it, but she just thinks I stole her new found money. |
t3_389on5 | relationships | Me [26 M] with my ex-girlfriend [25 F], we broke up in late December and were meant to reinstate contact within a few months. Not sure how to phrase the text | We were together a couple of years, and she was my best friend. Due to complications of her not taking care of her depression/anxiety issues, we split up. We had a pet together, which I took ownership of after the split. At one point we lived together but that didn't work out either.
The breakup was definitely not mutual - I initiated it, and I think it felt very sudden/unexpected for her. It was a shit time for both of us, but we decided to go no-contact for a "few months" to let things settle. I still have a bunch of her stuff, and she has some of mine. I still need to get her to sign over the cat's microchip to my name.
It's been about five months now and I'm having a hard time putting together a text message to initiate the conversation. I imagine that I'm meant to be the one contacting her, as I initiated the breakup? Our idea was that we would at least remain friends. | broke up with my depressed girlfriend in late December. I don't know how to reinitiate contact, so we can exchange stuff and perhaps strike up a friendship. Can someone give me a good simple text I can send her? |
t3_1e3vtm | relationships | I [25F] am in a transitional period in life and I don't feel like the transition is going well with my fiance [27M]. | So here's a very brief overview....
I met my SO right when my career began taking off about two years ago. Both things happening were AWESOME developments in my life. Although, a busy 60+ hours/week career isn't great for a person physically or mentally, and I let myself go a bit.
Lately I have been a stressed out nervous wreck and I just crossed into the "overweight" category. I'm sick of it. I started making immediate changes - doing things I enjoyed when I was single like painting and teaching piano, I've started working out an hour a day, and I'm working my ass off to improve in any way that I can, because I enjoy bettering myself.
Then comes my SO. I work 50+ hr weeks still, he works part time. When I come home, I have time to work out, eat dinner, and go to sleep. I can't get him to do anything, and we bicker constantly. His attitude SUCKS lately, he creates ridiculous messes around the house, doesn't do any chores, and I don't know how to talk to him.
We actually discussed it the other night when he spent more money than we could afford getting absolutely shit face drunk and he finally opened up to me, saying he was so happy I was doing things for myself again, promised he would get better with helping out around the house, etc. but now he doesn't remember that conversation AT ALL.
**Here is my question: Is this normal? Do all couples who live together/marry go through this? What do I do when I can't stand him? I'm trying so hard to be nice. | I am making very positive lifestyle changes and I have almost no free time to myself. SO won't help around the house and has a shitty attitude that pulls me down. What do I do? |
t3_m8bcj | AskReddit | Reddit, please help my girlfriend and I. | I'm usually not a beggar for help but this is a very serious issue. My girlfriend lives and is a citizen of Canada. She wants to obtain a Visa to live and work in the United States permanently so she could be closer to me. She has told me there is nothing left for her in Canada and will think about fully making the move. The only problem is, we can't seem to get a Visa for her since she isn't opening a business or a millionaire. What can we do, without resorting to marriage, to have her live here? Maybe if she went back to school? I'm not fairly educated on this topic so any advice would be appreciated. | My girlfriend lives in Canada. She wants to become a permanent resident of the United States and work here. Need advice on how to get a Visa. |
t3_35lstn | relationships | Me [27M] with my coworker and friend [18F] of 3 months, we've gotten really close but never see each other outside work. | I hope this is the right place for this, can't really figure out where else to ask this.
I've got a question and I was hoping you gentlefolk might be able to answer it for me. A few months back I made friends with a girl who I met at work. We immediately hit it off and have been texting some what regularly, sometimes in to the late hours of the night, talking about all manner of nonsense. We have lots shared interests and the stuff we don't we can easily make fun of and tease each other for in good fun. It seems out friendship has quickly become very strong over our text message conversations yet it never seems to progress to anything beyond that.
We also work together at a retail store. From what I heard, she enjoys working with me the most out of all our coworkers and we'll sometimes hang out in the parking lot after work, but this is few and far between as we work at most once every 2 weeks together. This is about all the interaction we have in person. I've invited them out several times, both as a 1 on 1 hang outs and a group thing, but she seems to always be busy or always has other plans. Usually I take this as a sign that she may not be interested and back off but our conversations haven't let up and she seems genuinely sorry that she can't make it, going so far as offering to bake me cinnamon rolls from scratch (after I of course mention that cinnamon rolls are my favorite ever). I'm not sure what to think at this point. Should I even try asking her to hang out again when I almost always know the answer? Can a friendship survive through text messaging alone? Are we really not that close and am I misreading things? | Formed what I think is a really strong friendship, but we never hang out outside work. Am I just reading in to this wrong? |
t3_1aqqw4 | relationships | I am a 26 yr old male needing advice. | I am a 26 yr old male and I bought my parents house. I have a Good Job. I broke up with my gf of a couple years and she had a daughter that I was the only father she has ever known. Well fast fwd a few months. I am still getting over not so much the gf but the whole being dad scenario. Well my parents are retired and live down south for the most part. However they enjoy coming to visit (which I don't mind) but around spring break they over stay their welcome in my opinion. They have been here 5 days now and my mother is driving me crazy. I wake up in the middle of the night to my mother fucking cleaning. Dusting this or rearranging that. Well my brother is overseas and his wife and son are in my home state visiting her parents and are planning to come visit my parents in my home now. I don't want to seem like a bad person. I love my nephew and family very much but Damn I just really want to be alone right now and feel over powering urge to run away and go on vacation. I just really don't want to be around children at the moment Am I a bad person for not wanting my family to come visit and stay in my home?
Why do old people have to run the fucking heat all the God Damn time? Also If I have a 4 bedroom house and no one has slept in the other 3 beds since I washed the sheets is it really necessary to wash the fucking sheets again?
Sorry Reddit just at wits end here. | I am tired of my mom being in supermom clean patrol mode cleaning my house which isn't dirty in prep of my brother's family coming to visit all without my consent and don't know what to do. |
t3_rawv0 | dating_advice | And here comes another cliche question.. | So, me 22/F and him 22/M, seeing each other 4 months.
I see him eh, fairly often, however we've only been out formally maybe three times. Coffee the 1st time, movie the 2nd, and breakfast the 3rd.
Each and every single time i've offered to pay and he declined. For the movie date, he got there before me and got our tickets before I could even try. Breakfast I offered, and he said jokingly: "I can't believe you just asked me that". So, clearly he is the type that prefers/wants/feels he needs to pay. He also has a well paying job, so it shouldn't be a strain on him, im just the type of girl who doesn't take advantage and doesn't want to give him the wrong idea.
He asked me to dinner tomorrow, should I even bother offering at this point? Or just let him take charge. Sure, clearly I understand he's made it a point THAT HE PAYS, but I don't want to not offer this one time, then have him thinking im trying to take him for his money lol. Yes, I over-analyze. | I always offer to pay, he declines. We're going to our first dinner tomorrow night-- should I even bother offering anymore? |
t3_2z7qxl | relationships | Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of 1 year, he is getting selfish in bed and it's making me frustrated with him | I have been seeing my bf for almost a year now, but we have been officially bf and gf for 4 months. I love him immensely and we get along really well! Our sex life has always been great! He is the best sex parter I have ever had and our sex drives are on the same level.
However, lately I noticed that he started being a little selfish in bed - the sex is still great but he is not interested in bringing me to an orgasm as much as he was before. The sex is still great: lots of kissing, intercourse and hugging after he comes. It takes us both some time to reach an orgasm. Yet while I focus on him coming he doesn't seem to return the favor.
I mentioned it to him before and he agreed that he needs to focus on my needs as much as I focus on his, yet nothin has changed.
Am I acting like a spoiled gf? Is this asking too much?
Any feedback is appreciated! | Bf isn't focused on my sexual needs as much anymore. |
t3_3tqgz0 | relationships | Me [20 F] with my coworker [26 M] "drunk texted" me last night. | I have been working with my coworker "Josh" for over a year now. We get along great and he's like a brother to me. We hang out outside of work sometimes, but we have never seen each other in a romantic way.
Last night Josh went out to a bar with his best friend. I woke up this morning to a few texts from him that had been sent in the middle of the night. One was responding to a question I had asked earlier, one was him asking if I wanted to come over and "hang out" (which is an inside joke between us) and a few gibberish messages. However, one message stood out to me. All of the messages had misspellings except this one, which said
> You're a beautiful girl and I'm sorry for the drunk texts, but I want to tap that ass.
Josh immediately followed that message by apologizing and saying it was his friend all along. Part of me believes him, but another part of me isn't sure. It could have been Josh's friend, but why would his friend have messaged me in the first place? Also, Josh tends to be pretty honest when he gets drunk. Should I be concerned, or am I making a big deal out of nothing? | Coworker sent me some questionable "drunk texts", not sure how to react. |
t3_2hytnt | tifu | TIFU by accidentally flipping the bird. | So unlike most TIFU'S this one actually happened today.
Long story short I was in class today when I was staring at my friend across the room and I flexed my middle finger towards my chin not intentionally give him the bird but it's visible.
Turns out there was someone else looking in my direct line of sight and I had absolutely no idea she was looking for at least five seconds. By the time I saw her I assumed that she thought I was giving her the bird; She even turned around to see if I was giving it somebody else. At first I kind of denied intentionally giving the bird in general claiming I was just tensing up.
After class ended I let her know saying that I apologized saying it wasn't meant for, then said that I had no idea that she was looking to begin with and that I hope I didn't offend her in any manner. She accepted the apology and we went on with our day. | Gave the bird to classmate, ended up in the line of sight of another classmate, denied even making the sign, apologized; Fin. |
t3_1i1uaa | AskReddit | Do STIs with location-specific infection sites get worse with continual contact with an infection source? | *Please cite some external source, if possible, for your answer to assist in quality control*
Some sexually Transmitted Infections (or STDs, I don't care about the semantics) have location-specific infection sites that have some sort of activity persistence based on the infection site long after the initial infection. For example: herpes can cause herpes blisters that are located on and around the initial infection site. I believe some forms of HPV will also cause growths on areas of the skin where the initial infection occurred.
Will constant contact (example: regular contact with an infected partner over weeks / months / years) with the same STI after initial infection cause the STI to worsen in severity? For example, with subsequent infections moving to additional infection sites, resulting in additional areas for outbreaks to possibly occur / additional shedding to occur when the infected person is in an active (or even during passive) shedding phase?
Or, alternatively, once an initial infection has occurred, will the body's immune system (or some other action) prevent additional sites on the body from becoming "infection / outbreak" sites? | once infected with an STI/STD such as herpes or hpv, which have growths/blisters on the initial infection site, will later exposures to the same STI/STD (assuming the same strain) leave an already infected person with a chance of making their STI/STD even worse, by creating additional "initial infection sites" due to additional exposure? Or, is it more of a "you either have it, or you don't" systemic thing - with an already infected person having no chance of worsening their STI/STD after subsequent exposures? |
t3_3aj91m | tifu | TIFU by wearing a dress that's too short | I'm using a throwaway because I don't want my boyfriend or their siblings to see this.
This morning started like any other, frantically trying to find something to wear, creating a pit of discarded clothes across the floor. I decided on my sister's dress (it took me 15 minutes to untie the knot at the neck, I should've given up).
I realized it was a bit short, coming maybe 4 inches above my knee. I figured I'd be fine, knowing I wouldn't be bending over, plus it wasn't windy...what could go wrong?
Eventually, I put shorts on underneath, they were slightly large but nothing major. Off I went to my boyfriend's house, skimpy dress and all.
The shorts were irritating to keep pulling up, so naturally I just took them off. (Perhaps a belt would've prevented all of this). My boyfriend left to go grocery shopping with his dad, and since I would rather play games, I stayed behind. I was in the middle of a match when his little sister came in and asked for a DS charger. I hastily got up to look for it, and I knew he had one stuffed between his couch cushions, but it was snagged in his pile of laundry. I bent down to tug it out and handed it over. She promptly left with an awkward thanks and I went back to the game...
I pulled my knees up to my chest and remembered I had no shorts on. I bent over, in front of his sister, and revealed my THONG.
NICE. | Took off shorts, left young girl scarred with the memory of my cheeks. |
t3_ohyvj | loseit | [HELP] Side effects of rapid weight loss/poor nutrition. Also, is this Skinny-Fat? | Hi loseit,
First some stats, I'm 5' 9'', 155lbs at the moment. I started at 187, and involuntarily went to 171 after I moved on my own, then I took control and am now at 155.
2 weeks ago I posted this: [Really discouraged after losing 25lbs and discovering that it's probably because of my thyroid.] So I went to the doctor, and from the tests looks like it's not a thyroid problem after all (haven't seen the doctor yet, but my appointment is in 2 weeks)
I was thinking the hair loss and constipation might be related to vitamin deficiencies, are these common side effects? I searched and found only a couple of posts on each, so it doesn't look too common. If they are, I think we should add them to the FAQ or something.
I bought a multivitamin to try and help, is it going to make me gain weight?
Kind of related, I currently have what I think is a skinny-fat look ([PICs - sorry, shitty camera] and I don't know if I should keep the calorie deficit or start with maintenance mode. | Is hair loss and constipation a common problem when dieting? Can multivitamin supplements help? Or are they going to interfere with my diet? |
t3_2ymaoe | relationships | Me [24 F] with my boyfriend [26M] 5 years, dinner dilemma | Boyfriend and I have been arguing recently about dinner.
I get up early, work out, go to work, come home early, clean up from the previous night, and prep/make dinner. I try to snack throughout the day and eat a late lunch, but I am usually starving for dinner by 6:30-7. (This probably has to do with my previous 18+ years of eating dinner back home with my parents at 5 pm.)
My boyfriend, on the other hand, doesn't even get home until 7:30-8pm, and wants to work out, shower and sometimes play video games until 8:30-9, and THEN he is ready for dinner.
Lately, I have been encouraging him to get up early and work out early so that we can eat dinner earlier (Like 8 pm, latest), but he says that I should just plan my snacks/lunch to his schedule and make dinner later.
My issue is this: I am the one making dinner, and I am the one cleaning up the morning after. I really am trying to compromise here but eating at 8:30-9pm is just ridiculous to me, especially when I go to bed like an hour later.
Should I compromise more? Is my boyfriend in the wrong? | I want to eat at 7-8pm. Boyfriend says I should compromise and eat at more like 9pm, even though I am the one making dinner and I am the one cleaning up. What do we do? |
t3_mnwt2 | relationships | Ironic, but how do I stop being needy? | My boyfriend (19M) recently told me (18F) that he thinks that I'm "getting TOO needy" ( his words and emphasis, not mine). A little background: He and I rarely see each other, and our only form of communicaion is through texting. We've been together eight months now, and we haven't been having this issue. I give him space whenever he needs it, and he knows I won't get mad if he asks for it. He always wants to talk, so I know I'm not the one being too clingy in that aspect. Overall, I don't see how I'm being needy.
Does it make me needy that I respond when he wants to talk? I feel like I'm missing something here. Feel free to ask me any questions. | I know this is ironic to ask, but I need to know so that I can fix it, but what is needy, and how do I stop coming across as it? |
t3_20f4ia | legaladvice | [United States] Need help! Divorce[kinda long sorry] | Im sorry if this isn't the right place to post this, if it is the wrong place, pm me the right subreddit and i will post there.
I am 23 years old, and i got married when i was 17 years old. I was pregnant and i thought getting married was the best option for my daughter because i grew up in an unstable household and i wanted the best for my child. We were married in a court house in Michigan in 2008. I was very unhappy, and i left in 2012 and moved back to California to stay with friends. My daughter(his biological daughter as well) is still with my Husband. I knew if i took her with me to California i wouldn't have been able to support her, and take care of her the way she deserved. Since then i have been struggling just to live, i couldn't find a stable place to live, or a job. I bounced around from friend's house to friend's house. Now i am in a better place, and i have found someone i am extremely happy with. I am currently pregnant.
I have been away from my Husband since 2012, we both dont want to be married any longer but i dont know anything about divorce. I understand that my rights as a parent with my daughter(who is with him) will most likely be taken away since i have not been with her since i left as well. I dont want custody of her because i know she is happy, and healthy with my husband and his family. [if that seems cold, its not, i just know she's happy there, and i can't take her away from her wonderful gma and gpa ] I want to divorce my husband, but i dont know what or even how to do this. I can't afford a lawyer, or to fly back to michigan for court dates, etc. | I am a 23 year old female, who's been married since 2008 and whom hasn't lived with her husband since 2012. we have 1 child together, and im not fighting for custody. I dont know what to do, im quite uneducated in marriages/divorces and i need some advice/help please. |
t3_4bpitg | relationships | Me 26M with my ex-gf 25F 1.5yr, seeing each other for the first time after the breakup (6 weeks) | Hi,
She broke up with me, however I was unhappy pretty much the whole way through the relationship as she was a habitual belligerent, abusive, and hurtful binge drinker (used to happen weekly, then became a monthly occurence). It was absolutely like dating two completely different people. She wouldn't cheat on my, but she'd act like a maniac in all sorts of ways. Embarrasing
I never fully 'committed' to her. There was always doubt, and I held back. I refused to celebrate anniversaries, I told her I wasn't ready to move in with her or marry her when she asked...
I thought I was on the mend- met a few great girls when out, got phone numbers. However- none have replied to me (furthering my feelings of rejection).
Seems clear-cut, but it's never that simple. I still have strong feelings for her. She's 'too hot' for me (i'm short, with no money, she's a tall, stunning once model).
I know all that superficial/on paper stuff doesn't matter, because the reality is she was I knew how wrong she was a long time ago... I'm concerned I'll end up trying to get back with her when I see her in person tomorrow (she's coming for a visit). | Was I too harsh to my GF for binge drinking? Reassurance needed that I shouldn't stay with this girl! |
t3_2zow4o | tifu | TIFU by thinking the solar eclipse was just the moon | This (unlike some post) actually happened today.
So the day started as any other, got up, got dressed, then went to sixth form (I live in the UK).
Anyway, the time came where the solar eclipse actually happened. I was going to my next class, and I was with a mate of mine. I was walking with him, and the words just came out of my mouth; "why is everyone taking a load of pictures of the moon?".
I knew the damage I had done once i had said it. Now, everyone knows me as the guy who thought that the solar eclipse was just the moon. | Thought the solar eclipse was just the moon. |
t3_36xn0l | relationships | My (29/f) boyfriend (34/m) of 2 years is constantly being "catfished" and his nativity is turning me off. | Hi reddit,
This one is kind of weird.
My boyfriend and I don't have a normal relationship. It's semi-open, but ONLY to find people to introduce to our sex life together (threesomes, foursomes, that sort of thing.)
He is big into social media and making friends on the internet, which is something I don't have a problem with until it affects "real life." (If we are spending time together and he spends more time on his phone than talking to me, it becomes an issue.)
With that, the people he talks to are mainly semi-attractive women. However, every time a really attractive woman talks to him (he finds them on twitter or tumblr) they are ALWAYS fake people using other people's pictures.
He constantly gives these fake people the benefit of the doubt. I'll tell him that they're probably fake, and he'll say "well who knows." You know who knows? I do, because I reverse image search their pictures and they are on multiple sites. The more recent one is one he started talking to on his porn tumblr. He wanted me to start talking to her so we could "start something" (I guess sexting, or something) and it is a faker using a picture of a 16 year old girl.
This naivety is such a turn off. I don't know what to do really. I've told him that he is too trusting on the internet but it doesn't really phase him.
I obviously can't change him, so I think my only option is to let the distasteful feelings toward him either pass or turn into resentment. If he wants "friends" on the internet, what harm does that do to me? I'm starting to think I'm just being a bitch, or maybe deep down I'm questioning his motives for seeking out these women.
What should I do? Should I just find a way to get over it? I know how petty this all is, and I'm ashamed that I even feel this way.
Thanks | My boyfriend makes friends online and they all turn out to be fake. His naivety is a turn off. Is this something I should just get over? How do I get over it? |
t3_444d1h | tifu | TIFU by being an insecure fuck | This FU happened almost a decade ago, but fuck it. When I was little my parents made me take swimming lessons at the local JCC. I hated swimming lessons with a passion, I dont know why, but I did. I liked pools and I loved sports, but I fucking hated swimming lessons. So one day I especially didnt want to go leave the locker rooms and go to the lessons. So I did what any rational thinking 10 year old would do, climb into a locker and close the door. After a while it started to get uncomfortable so I tried to open the locker, but lo and behold the door was locked. So there I was stuck in a locker... For at least an hour people passed by and me being a socially awkward kid was too shy and embarrassed to call out for help. Even long after the lessons ended nobody knew I was missing because I had 2 hours to kill after swimming before my ride came. I thought I was going to die in there before someone found me. At that point I started crying and by a stroke of luck someone heard me and let me out. Except this person was my friends older brother and he started laughing at my misery, and then came the best part... He showed me a latch on the inside of the locker that I could have lifted to let myself out. I couldn't take the shame anymore so I bolted. Turns out my legs weren't working so well and I ended up flat on my face. | Im spastic, locked myself in a lock to avoid swim lessons, couldnt get out, was to insecure to ask for help, friends older brother heard me crying, let me out, and I fell on my fucking face while running away in shame. |
t3_2512n6 | relationships | Me [18 M] haven't seen my ex-girlfriend [18F] in a long time, and she is going to be at my best friends party, what should I do? | So I went out with my ex last year for 6 months, had great times and stuff, but we broke it up because it suddenly stopped working. About a week after the breakup I decided "no contact" would be my best bet for getting over her, so I explained to her what I was doing, and blocked her on all forms of social media and such. I've seen her only once since the breakup, and that was when I was working and it gave me an anxiety attack. I haven't contacted her in the last 7 months or so, except this one time she texted me, but it was of no significance.
Anyway so, My best buddie's 18th is coming up in a months time, and she is most likely going to be there as they go to school together. I'm super worried and stressing out that I will freak out, choke up or something when I see her, or that she will ruin my night. I'm not gonna say I'm fully over her, there are definitely dormant feelings that things like this stir up inside me. I've been stressing thinking about it heaps lately. I'd be pretty sad to see her with another guy and stuff.
Do you guys have any tips for me? Should I just tough it out? How can I mentally prepare myself? Should I unblock her on Facebook to talk to her and see what vibes I get from her about how I should act and stuff?
Thanks very much in advance! | Ex-gf who I haven't seen in months will be at my best friends 18th birthday party, I'm worried I'll freak out when I see her. |
t3_2ontvj | personalfinance | Is this the right order to pay off my debts? | I've been reading a lot about debt stacking and debt snowball methods of paying down debt. Although useful in paying off debts, I think each has its own flaws and am thinking of using an approach that combines the two. Rather than focusing on just the lowest balance (snowball) or highest interest (stacking), I want to determine where my money will have the greatest impact on monthly expenses.
To determine my order, I take the outstanding loan balance and divide it by the monthly payment. I then rank each ratio from largest to smallest and pay off the largest one first. I would then use the monthly payment from each paid off loan to pay down the next loan on the list.
Using my own student loans as an example:
*Loan 1: Balance - $13,000 (6.55%); Payment - $143; Ratio - 90.9
*Loan 2: Balance - $6,780 (4.00%); Payment - $50; Ratio - 135
*Loan 3: Balance - $16,500 (3.25%); Payment - $100; Ratio - 165
*Loan 4: Balance - $6,000 (5.00%); Payment - $66; Ratio - 90
So the order I would pay off each loan would be 3, 2, 1, 4.
The reason I ask is that I recently received a promotion at work and want to use the extra monthly income on reducing my family's debts (we have more than the few listed above). What are the issues with using the above approach? Is it the most efficient way to determine order of debt payoff? | Using ratio of outstanding balance to monthly payment to determine order of loan payoffs. What are the flaws? |
t3_3fkaq7 | relationships | My [m/18] friend [m/18] and I have been on a foreign trip for three weeks, we have 3 more to go and we're at each others throats | So my friend and I have been touring European countries, like I said above we have been here for three weeks and we have just under three left. We have been getting on each others nerves, any little argument could cause an uproar which could ruin a few hours due to us not talking or being a dick to each other.
One thing he said struck a personal cord with me. A bit of a quick back story. My father and I don't have a great relationship, he's an alcoholic and likes to hold onto his money (he's very well off). I constantly asked him to help me with this trip in someway, he said no but he would pay for my train passes for a grad/birthday gift. So I took my savings of four years and paid for it myself, ~6000$. My friend on the other hand had 7000$ in savings and his whole trip was paid for him by his grandparents. You can say I'm a bit envious and annoyed.
One thing that has bothered me is one time when I wanted to look at taking first class instead of second was he called me spoiled. Not only did he call me spoiled but he went on and off for an entire train ride. I thought he was being ridiculous, I could have called him out on his trip being paid for him, him expecting me to pay things for him and other bills I have been paying myself. I asked him to buy me a 1€ donut and he told me there was absolutely no way even though I've easily paid for 50€ of his stuff. This was about a week ago (the spoiled part) and it's still bother me, I asked him today to take it back but he said there's no way he would because I say words so I should get over it.
So I guess my questions is, how can I either; handle this in a way where I don't blew up at him and cause more disturbances, or bring this up to him in a constructive way? | I'm mad that my friend calls me spoiled even though his trip was paid for him and he expects me to pay for his stuff too when he was way more money than me. Also a lot of hatred and bitch fights I'd like to avoid. |
t3_3upe7e | tifu | TIFU by throwing an ice cube at someone | Okay, so this story didn't happen today (I'm sorry) but it is still worth sharing.
My friends (two female one male) and I finished school this summer and so we went on vacation together to celebrate. We were staying at some city in Spain, were everyone was partying.
At the third day we were already pretty fucked up but we still decided to go to that one big club (which was too crowded and too loud, but that's another story.)
However, the two girls were sharing a purse together so the likelihood of something getten stolen will reduce. Unfortunately the money and the ID-Card of one of the girls got stolen. Don't ask me how the stuff of the other girl was still there but that was what my best friend (male) and I had to deal with: a drunk, sad, and pissed girl who was not in the mood for partying anymore. So we went to the bar in the club.
After buying about ~~100~~ 10 shots more for everyone and a new cocktail for me I had one of my worst drunk ideas in my life. I decided to cheer up my friend by throwing ice cubes through the bar. I have absolutely no idea how that was going to cheer her up but hey it couldn't hurt nobody.
So after my third ice cube a group of young men turned around looking for something or someone. One of them eventually came to my best friend and me and asked if we had seen someone throwing something. Thank goodness my buddy said: "Yes, there were some guys throwing something but they already left."
After that, that guy returned to his friends I had seen what my ice cube had done. One of those guys had blood running down starting right above his eye. I really hit someone that bad that they probably had to get stitched their brow.
The worst and stupidest thing was that my friend, who got her stuff stolen was leaving 5 minutes earlier with my other friend for the toilet, so she couldn't see my fuck up. | Wanted to cheer up my friend by throwing ice cubes. Ended up hurting someone really bad. |
t3_213uxh | relationships | Did my [20 M] girlfriend [19 F] of 3 months, fell in love with an idea of me? | Ok, first things first. We've known each other for quite some time, we have a commong 'best friend (also a girl)' so we ocassionaly hanged out etc ... We've fallen in love almost instantly at this New Year's party and have been inseparable since then. We only see each other on the weekends (I am studying a few miles away) but we skype all the time, talk all the time, we have common friends; i hang out with her sister at college ...
She comes from a very affluent family, I come from a middle class family but I earn a lot of money (for a college student) on my own with my IT firm. (much more money than she has). I am one of the 'cool' guys, I drive a nice car, I take her to nice places, people know me and usually like me ... But I am really strained, I feel like I have to constantly impress her. I've started doing even more fitness, I've started working more to earn more money, I've started studying more to have better grades, I am seriously pushing myself and I am so very tired of this. She tells me she loves me all the time, she tells me I am the one for her, she proudly introduces me to everyone, but I really think she is only in love with the idea of having such a boyfriend. She rarely does anything for me, she gets mad at me for no reason at all, she is pretty controlling ... but I do everything for her. | I love her so much and I know she does too, but I am tired, exausted even. |
t3_44eu7i | tifu | TIFU by accidentally piercing my wang | This happened no less than 5 minutes ago.
I just got home from a long day at work, came home, and began stripping down to take a nice hot shower. Thats when I noticed it. The little black dot on my donger. Now I don't normally have acne anywhere close to my downstairs light post, except for the occasional butt pimple, so I was rather intrigued to see what the occurrence was. I immediately begin inspecting my womb raider's new marking only to find that I had succumbed to a small black head. Ive had black heads before so I know what the procedure is on removing them, and I begin applying pressure around the small black dot to relieve it of its contents. This is where it gets interesting. After applying slight pressure to the black head, it doesnt come out of one spot, but two! I remove the black grime from the top of my tummy banana and begin inspecting what appears to be a worm hole from one side of the skin to another. Being the manly man I am, I go into my kitchen and grab a tooth pick, and in a fit of rage I poke it in the hole and it glides with ease through my lance of love, leaving me with what I can only call an accidental piercing. | Came home from work, went to shower, found black head on top of my knob, stuck tooth pick through hole from said black head. Pierced my pee-pee |
t3_37w3p3 | relationships | Just caught my [26 f] boyfriend [27 m] in a lie for the first time in our 4 year relationship. | I'm not so concerned about the lie itself but more so what it means about how my boyfriend feels about me.
Last night my boyfriend and I had dinner plans around 8. I went to happy hour with my coworkers then came home to change. I called him from there asking if I should meet him at his apt. He asked if we could take a rain check because he was worn out from work and wanted to just stay home and rest solo. I know he needs alone time occasionally to charge so I said ok no prob. I was a little bummed that he cancelled so last minute. I tried calling him later in the night around midnight to ask him a quick question and he didn't answer. It seemed weird because he usually has his phone glued to him. I went to bed and when I woke up I had a text from him around 2 asking if I was up.
This morning I went over to his place and he acted normal. But then we went to hang out with some mutual friends, and when I was alone with his friend Cody he asked me where I was last night and that they missed me. So apparently boyfriend went to the local bar with his buds, which explains the last minute cancel and not answering his phone till closing time.
I haven't said anything to my boyfriend yet but I'm completely weirded out. I wouldn't have cared if he wanted to go out with his friends alone. At this point my trust is just diminished. And I'm mostly just confused and embarrassed. | just realized boyfriend feels the need to lie to me to go out alone. Confused and hurt. |
t3_27ofw9 | relationships | Me [22 M] with my GF [21 F] 3 years, Do I attempt to talk to her, and try to show her i'm worth keeping? | Me and my gf dated for over 3 years, in those 3 years she's grown up a lot. I haven't. On top of never getting a job, and living with my parents, i was an immense asshole. It's been the most painful week of my life so far, and i've only talked to her once. The one time we talked she said, "i need time to figure myself out". I'm assuming she has realized im not worth shit and doesn't want to waste any more time with me.
It's been about 3 days since that really fucked up realization that I was a terrible person. I don't want it to end after 3 years, i still love her and she did say she still loved me. I just need to get a job to get my life rolling.
Is there any getting back with her? or am i just moving onto the bargaining stage?
Should I send a text to her brother, sister, or cousin to see what her feelings are? or should i just keep the no contact going?
I think about her every night before i go to sleep, and basically cry myself to sleep. I dream about her when i finally do sleep, and when i wake up i cry because it's not real. I'm so fucked up. | dated 3 years, im worthless shes moving on. Is there a possibility that i can get her back if i get my shit together? |
t3_15pzpa | AskReddit | If everyday was like Groundhog day for everyone, what would happen to this planet? | So I got this idea after watching Groundhog day again a few months back and me and my friends have been discussing it a lot. So this is the scenario:
Let's say today is the day and you wake up at 7AM (early for some I know but just go with it) and you went on about your day, went to your parties or whatever and then when you woke up tomorrow it would still be December 31st. Now this is the plot for Groundhog day, but what if this was for everyone on the planet?
If I burned down my house today, it would be there perfectly fine tomorrow. If I carved a rageface in my arm, it wouldn't be there tomorrow. However, if I read the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy today, I would remember it tomorrow.
So memory and nothing else. That is the only way information can be carried out from one day to another.
What do you think would happen? | If everyday was like Groundhog day for everyone, what would happen? |
t3_39ftg0 | relationships | My [23F] coworker [50ishM] keeps arguing with/correcting/double checking me on everything and it's driving me crazy! What can I do? | I started a job about 4 months ago as the assistant to the director of a government division. I've mastered all of my duties pretty quickly and feel fairly confident in my understanding of policies and procedures as well as where I have the authority to provide guidance on matters to our division staff.
A new coworker, who is ranked above me but is not my supervisor, has not been respecting me on anything since he arrived last month. He'll ask me a question on how to handle a time and attendance matter, for example (I'm the division's timekeeper). I'll tell him what he should do. Then he'll proceed to question me about it, imply I could be wrong or making assumptions, and go ask the director or deputy director if what I said was correct. Sometimes, in a group (like at trainings with other divisions' staff) or conversation, I'll bring something up and he'll try to "correct" me in front of others, even though he doesn't actually know as much about whatever it is/hasn't been here as long.
This has happened several times since he's started and it's getting old really quickly. My job is to relay and enforce policies or make decisions that are under my purview, and it's really interfering with my ability to do that. What should I do? Discuss with my supervisor (who outranks the coworker in question)?
I'm honestly worried my supervisor and the director will support this behavior and basically take away the little authority I have around here (it's been hard to gain it in the first place because I'm youngest person here!) which will make my job even more miserable than it already is... Help! | Coworker is always questioning me/appealing to higher ups on things that should be my decision. It's frustrating and makes my job harder than it should be. What should I do? |
t3_1kdtqt | tifu | TIFU by taking Midol with ITP | I have ITP, which is when your immune system kills off your platlets, which are the helpful little cells that stop bleeding. I have some platelets, just not that many. It's one of three autoimmune issues, another one is an IBD. Both are relevant.
I also have ADD and NLD for which I take concerta. Thanks to an issue with my scripts, I have to skip doses. This made me feel like crap, so I took Midol for the caffeine. I'm not usually that retarded, but today I was.
I'm not supposed to have it because it can exacerbate bleeding. I didn't think much of it, but I should've. Now, thanks to the IBD and the ITP, I've got GI bleeding. I'm running to the bathroom a few times an hour to crap blood. I'm going to have no energy for several days now, and I completely deserve it. | I gave myself rectal bleeding by taking a no-no OTC drug. This will make me more anemic which will suck up any remaining energy. I'm retarded. |
t3_2f4mp9 | relationships | Me [21 M] with my Girlfriend [18 F] 15 months,I want a break to sleep with somebody else | We have been together a long time and I feel as though I am missing out on my youth! We are constantly arguing over pathetic things and I feel as though she is not mature enough for a relationship of this length! there is another girl who is tempting me into sex with her but she is not someone I want a relationship!
Me and my Current GF have spoken about a break as it could be what will help end all the stupid arguments! I love my girlfriend but I dont want to loose her! Should we have a break and I sleep with this other girl to set my mind straight on what and who I want? | I want to sleep with this other girl! |
t3_10lr8u | tifu | TIFU Texted a message about my boss...to my boss...and HIS boss. | I work as a poker dealer at a racetrack/card club in Minnesota. My direct superior decides which tables I deal and when. I had just gone through two awful tables and the second one broke(all the players left meaning I would be sent to a new lineup). The spot he sent me was past the best tables in the room, meaning I wouldn't be going there. I took a smoke break and texted my wife(dealer in the same room). "Holy FUCK. Just got Kevin-ed. Hard." Instead, I sent it to the last "person" to text me, the manager's message board. (I receive messages about my shifts on my phone, and my responses go directly to all the managers in my department) I was immediately confronted by the Cardroom manager who happened to see it as soon as it was posted. He's trying to help me think of a cover-up story, but the message was seen by four other managers AND the HR department. Any advice that might save my exposed ass would be appreciated. | Sent a text intended for my wife to the online message board at work. HELP! |
t3_344k1s | personalfinance | Long stay in hospital--credit card problems | Hi Reddit,
I am an elderly man whose son is a lurker (He is typing for me). He suggested I come here for credit card help. I was in the hospital from December to March, and have been in a slow, hazy recovery since then. I am now well enough to catch up on everything I missed.
Anyway, I had been rebuilding my credit prior to my hospital stay, and was timely on my credit card payments. I landed in the hospital unexpectedly, and had not told my family about my outstanding accounts. My wife and child were incredible, and stayed by my side the entire time. The downside to this is that my mail accumulated and no one ever saw the statements coming in.
Many thought I would not make it, but here I am. I plan on sticking around for quite a bit. But...I now currently have a number of credit card bills that have racked up interest for 5 months due to my stay and recovery. Is there anything I can do to fix this? I would like to get back to fixing my credit. | I was in the hospital for 3 months, and in recovery for 2 months. My credit card balances racked up and my credit has likely dipped. How do I fix this? |
t3_2tdwrv | relationships | Me [23F] with my SO[27M] Living together. Strippers, Drugs & Alchol. A man's weekend. | My SO's Brother is having a Bachelor's party. It will be a 3 day house boat party with strippers, drugs and alcohol.
I know that bachelor parties are a part of life and that I shouldn't have an issue with him going. I have no intention of trying to get him to not go, I just want to know what other ladies do to help deal with it/not think about it?
I feel so uneasy about the strippers, the influence of his older brothers and the drugs.
As background: I trust him not to do anything he thinks is wrong, but i'm worried what he thinks is wrong will be different to what I think is wrong.
I have told him the thought of strippers make me uncomfortable. He mentioned that he is mildly grossed out by strippers because of how many men they have been around but I know that won't stop him from having his hands on them when his older brothers are encouraging him.
Our conversations don't seem to get anywhere because I don't want to come off as a psycho, insecure and jealous girlfriend.
Would love your thoughts or even the male perspective. I want him to be happy. How can I stop letting this bother me? | what do other ladies do to help deal with it/not think about it, when their partners go to the strippers/bachelor parties? |
t3_37f83u | relationships | Me [21 M] with my [19 F] 8 months, I'm not sure if i want to end the relationship or not. My gut is telling me to end it | When I started dating this girl i knew it wouldn't be forever, and I think now is a good time to end it. The semester just ended and its the beginning of summer. I know I should end it now, but there's something preventing me from going through with it. I don't know if it's because i just don't want to be alone, or if this girl is really someone i should keep around. I feel good when I'm with her, but when we're apart all i can think about is breaking up with her. I don't understand.
We get along really well, and she's really sweet. If someone asked me why I wanted to break up with her i don't know if i can think of a good reason other than it just doesn't feel right. | I'm not sure if i should dump her or not. My gut tells me yes, but when I'm with her I can't do it. |
t3_33xlwu | tifu | TIFU by following Jamaican biker | TIFU on a highspeed descent on a road bike. On a S-Bend section @ 35~mph I tapped my brakes. Which illicited a complaint from behind me.
"Don use your breaks Mon, comon" in A Jamacian accent. I pull the turn tighter and let him pass. He yells something unintelligible.( green helmet with dreads)
I then yell and offer to follow him, he slaps his biker shorts.
2 seconds later as we enter a small dip with a left hand curve I no longer thinking of the path but keeping pace with ballsy Jamaican, I am pedaling.
Sky, ground, sky, ground, sky, ground, fence, black, fence.
Sit up fingers in mouth, teeth all there. Jamaican looks back for a second while already 30m ahead and keeps going.
Blood everywhere, two other guys stop and help me get to the road so buddy can take me to the VA ER. (Started rain\hail thunder at this point)
Using google it led us to the CO university Hospital at first which in reality was a Dave and Busters....
Nothing broken somehow. Stitches above eyebrow and still need a graft for the missing skin under nose. Carbon bike survived.
(Third ride on this speed demon on a road bike, up till now I had only ridden on a CX\ Mountain bike, lower pedal position was my undoing) | Jamaican causes judgment lapse, I use face to stop 2x6 fence instead of helmet. |
t3_1hm68v | relationships | i am a [16M] and am going to be breaking up with my [16F] girlfriend. dating 19 months | My girlfriend and i have been in a very rocky situation for quite a while now. She'll do something to anger me but if i respond angrily and argue, the relationship gets worse. She'll insult and demean me whenever she's upset at me and is completely unreasonable... but i loved her. I haven't been able to break up with her.
Our relationship was good for several months until a fight we had. We managed to solve it but it stuck with me. It showed me her true colors and I stopped loving her. (this was four months ago). I wasn't sure if that was what i was actually feeling or just a phase in our relationship so i just ignored it because i didn't want to hurt her.
She kept getting worse though. Lately whenever we have a fight, she'll insult, act completely unreasonable, and will make sure to reinforce inside my head that its completely my fault because she can do no wrong.
I feel like our relationship has grown toxic for quite a while. One of my reasons for breaking up is I dont feel like im dating her. I feel like im dating her plus all of her friends. She'll go and tell every single one of her close friends what ever i do wrong. She just can't keep our relationship problems to herself and has to tell everyone about it.
I really do want to break up with her but need more motivation. | relationship has gone toxic and need to break up. How can I do this well? |
t3_4wryap | relationship_advice | I [18M] am getting extremely mixed signals from my crush [18F]. | We have been friends for 6 months now, and I've liked her from the start. We only met in person once, but I will see her this week once we both move into our dorms. In the meantime, we have video chatted, snapchatted, and texted. Here are the positive signals I've received from her: she often talks about our future together and how amazing it will be, she asked me to raise her new dog with her, she says that she thinks we will get much closer very soon, she asked if she could take me out to dinner (her treat), she always talks about how she wants to see me, and she's offered me a room in her home. However, on the other hand: when I mentioned dating her once she ignored it, it sometimes feels like she's avoiding me, and she has said that she has several potential romantic interests she wants to explore. I had said the same thing, though, so I don't know if that counts for much. She also has been cancelling our video chats a lot recently, but her texts have stayed flirtatious. In addition to all of this, in our most recent video chat, she told me all about her ex and cried because she really thought they had something. Does her telling me this mean something? I really want to ask her to be my girlfriend, but I'm not sure if she's being friendly or if she likes me back. | My college friend talks about our future and wants me to raise a dog with her, but she also has been bailing on me and mentioning other people. |
t3_1jqjs6 | relationships | Me[25M] and my fiancée [22F] after 4 years broke up a week ago. Out of the blue i was asked around to her house to be told she no longer loves me. i don't know what to do next. Shall i accept this and move on? | My fiancée has recently joined a new group of single friends at her work and they often go out clubbing and drinking together. Everything was fine with that up until last week when I was called around to her house to be told that she no longer loves me and she will be happier without me.
Her reason for no longer loving me is that she no longer wants the same things i do in the relationship. About 2 years into it purposed to her and she was so excited because this meant we could finally move out and start a family which we both dreamed about from the first year together. We were both very happy together. We told each other almost daily how much we meant to each other and often spoke of our future and children. But now just as our dream of moving out is becoming achievable she says she no longer wants any of this and wants to be single with her new friends.
In the breakup/split she has asked to keep all our photos we had together in a album because she didn't want to forget me. This doesn't sound like the thing someone who didn't love me would do. The advice I have been given from my friends/family is to accept this and move on. but her family says i shouldn't give up and she will soon realize her mistake. Holding on to hope at the moment is really killing me. I am loosing sleep and getting quiet down about things when i think about my life without her.
Shall i move on or wait?
(Apologies if spelling or grammar is missing) | Fiancee of 4 years doesn't love me anymore. because she thinks being single will make her happier. what shall i do? |
t3_2llszb | relationships | I [26 M] am having a hard time deleting my ex[20 F] out of my life. (1 1/2 year relationship) | It's been a month since we broke up and we had a long distance relationship. I would visit her for 2-3 days, twice a month, sometimes for longer durations.
She wanted a break because the distance was hard, even though we were trying to figure out how either of us could make a move (which was very possible).
She said while she loved me a lot, she was so sad without me there and wasn't sure if we should be together. I told her what's the point of a break, given that all this time in between seeing each other was a "break" .
I had offered to move there but she was very short with me and to be honest didn't have a real answer for any question I had about trying to work out the situation.
This bugs me because I have no idea what really happened and how we went from being lovey-dovey, text all day, spend all night on skype to "lets take a break" within a matter of 3-4 days.
If you read this far, you see the glaring contradictions already from what she said and what I tried to do to remedy it. I put a lot of time and energy into this relationship, it hurts
I can't delete her from BBM, Skype, or her cell number. Just knowing its there is killing me. Some part of me is hoping she messages me and apologizes and tells me she still wants to be with me. She has tried to tell me that she wants to still have me in her life because I was so important to her, and to me it sounded like she needed emotional support. She has mailed me my stuff and money she owed me so really there is nothing holding me back. I just don't know why I can't get over this and completely delete her from my life.
I need to move past this, help | 1 1/2 year relationship, can't completely delete her from my life because I'm hoping she turns around and realizes she wants to be with me. I don't contact her, but knowing I have a way to still bugs me. What do? |
t3_37w6nf | personalfinance | (SA) What is the average low-risk interest rate in New York? | Hi, I'm writing an article that only briefly touches on banking in the US (particularly NY), and I'm not sure if the same systems, terminology and conventions apply there as they do in South Africa.
My basic question is: what would the average interest rate be on a small amount of cash that the user has put into savings, for example. My article proposes a man putting small amounts of money away (between $5 and $12 a day) and earning interest on them over the period of 15 years.
Some articles I've read suggest a 10% interest rate in Stocks, but that sounds a little hard to believe. And even if it's true, practically, my hypothetical man wouldn't jump straight into Stocks investment with his first $12.
Capital Bank's site suggests an interest rate of 0.05%, but that seems a bit low to my inexperienced eye. I thought at first that this was because it listed it under a Money Trader account (which I assume means that you can take out that money whenever you want it), but it goes on to set the same 0.05% for Personal Savings (which I would assume means that you CAN'T just take out that money whenever you want it). I must be wrong somewhere here...? | What is the average (monthly/annual) interest-rate given to growing (by $12 every day) cash investments in a fixed deposit savings account? |
t3_3ypkv9 | dating_advice | Do I message the person I like, wait to see them in person soon or give up and move on? | At the start of the month I [18M] went to a party with a girl [19] I like from university, we've only briefly chatted before this, but spent most of the time chatting to each other and getting very drunk just the two of us despite the party. From what I remember afterwards she dragged me back to my room, we made sure we were both okay (relatively speaking) and then went our seperate ways. A few days (4/5) later as I was travelling home for christmas I messaged her about the night - working out what went on etc. as I couldn't remember a couple details and we had a great long funny conversation which quickly moved on from the nights events to other things.
I left it a few more days and messaged her "Hey! How are you?" and didn't get a response, at all but she didn't see the message until a couple days after it was sent.
So my issue boils down to this, do I message her again asking how her christmas was as a way to develop the friendship to the point where I can just ask her out, wait until i go back to uni in around 10 days where I will bump into her and see her anyway (We live in the same accomodation) or is she simply not interested and I should give up and move on?
Any help would be appreciated I am genuinely useless at this whole thing, the last couplr girls i've been into i've either sunk too much time into them when they are uninterested or not made the move when i should have and left it too late. | Had a few good conversations with a girl but didnt get a reply, do I message her again, wait till I see her in person soon or give up? |
t3_3siksw | relationships | My [M/17] sister [F/13] used to bully me for years and now I think it may have made a lasting impact on myself and my relationship to her | so to preface I'm not sure if this is the right place, regardless, I need to share and this is the first step.
My sister Clara used to yell, scream, attack, and throw things at me when I would sniffle, cough, wipe my nose, sneeze, or breathe heavy. This behaviour started around 9 or so years ago and it has continued since. although she is not as bothered by sneezing and such anymore, she is still very much a mean person to me and is showing little to no signs of relenting
When I was younger I would just stay in my room to escape being around her. family car rides were unbearable as having to sit next to her I would constantly be being told to "shut up", "stop breathing heavy", "don't do that". my parents could not control her as any amount of punishment could not make her stop. although they are good parents, sometimes they do some things I disagree with. a big one namely bein threatening Clara with a punishment if she continues acting out but even if she continued, they would not follow through with punishment. I believe this would reinforce her negative behaviour as she seemingly had no consequences.
nowadays I am having a rough time dealing with this. I do not remember much of my younger years childhood except for fighting and screaming and yelling. it's hard for me to think about right now. even though it did not affect me too much at the time, it is catching up with me quick. added on with the fact that she is still on everything I do, constantly in my business. just at supper today I did not finish all of my food and she called me ungrateful and wasteful.
I just want her out of my life at this point. I can't stand her. I think she is genuinely an awful human being and I resent how I have to see her everyday.
I do not plan to have any contact with her at all in the future.
I don't know how to deal with this anymore on my own, some help would be appreciated on how to handle or cope with the situation. | sister tormented me nonstop, now I reaally dislike her |
t3_3zt3t0 | personalfinance | Help. Non resident looking for online brokerage. Canadian expat who became Bahamian resident. | Posted this in daily discussions on r/investing with no responses.
I am an (29male, wife and 2xkids) Canadian expat living with residency in the Bahamas. I am looking for a online brokerage. Fees are important to me as I will be investing 80-90% in index funds. Will keep about 5% of my personal fund for individual stocks to play (gamble) with. I have a retirement fund through work with fidelity. (60k USD Invested in index funds, I contribute 6% and company matches. This is vested. Company also contributes 3% that I can not touch until 50). Looking to invest quarterly for myself to hopefully speed up retirement and have a good quality of life in retirement for my family and myself.
Investment goals are long term. Looking to invest about 20-30k yearly. Emergency fund is 30k sitting in savings account at bank (any better options for this). Household income is 130k. (Tax free). No vehicle loan, I rent with no desire to own in the Bahamas, children's school is 12k/year each. (24k total).
Only brokerage I have come across that accepts non residents is IB and they require a 10k min balance to open and monthly fees if you don't meet monthly trades.
I want more of a set and forget account that I can slowly plug money into and funds at low cost.
All money is USD. | need online brokerage with low fees for Canadian expat resident Bahamian. I have given up Canadian residency. |
t3_1xrn9t | offmychest | PSA: Doing things half way will fuck your life up | So I've always been the guy that likes to make things happen, try new things, and experiment, however, I have a tendency to only do things half way.
For example, I wanted to move across the country for school. My whole family grew up in California so I wanted to go to Boston University. I didn't try hard enough in school to go there so I compromised, going to a school in Arizona. At least it's out of state right?! Yes, but it blows.
Now, onto my reason for writing this, this semester I wanted to join a fraternity. I'll be a junior next semester so I thought it'd be fun to try something new. Well, a lot of places liked me, and I got told to come back the next day for one of the top houses on campus. However, my friends did not get a call back, so they continued to rush a more middle of the road fraternity.
I've never been that into frats so I decided just to rush the middle one with them, how much different could it be? A lot different. Apparently the frat I'm in now is being investigated for rape, therefore, no girls. To the hot girls, this place is a joke. I want to drop, but I can't rush again as a junior, I'll be one year from graduating. Also, I don't want to abandon my friends but god it sucks knowing that I could have been part of something that was what I really wanted but settled for this. | Doing things half way has landed me at a mediocre school, in a mediocre fraternity and it's pissing me off. |
t3_2o2j98 | loseit | Overwhelmed by the idea of needing to lose 100lbs. How to I overcome this feeling? | After years of yo-yo dieting, I'm finally figuring out how to do it the right way. I'm tackling my stress-eating problem, counting calories, and working out. All good.
(F, 5'3" SW: 226 GW: 130)
The problem I have is that I can't shake the overwhelming feeling I get when I think about how much weight I'm trying to lose. Nearly 100 lbs is a lot. Like, there are some grown-ass human beings that weight that much. It make my anxiety go haywire!
I'm worried that this anxiety will cause me to just give up. I know I have the tendency to only do things at which I think I will succeed.So, how do I shake this dreadful feeling and ensure my success? | Need to lose almost 100lbs. Overwhelmed by the sheer amount of weight. How to stop those feels? |
t3_3bubw3 | relationships | Me [21 M] feeling impassive. Girlfriend [21 F] of 2.5 years brought it up and now we're uncertain. | Hi all.
About one and a half year ago, I noticed that I was getting less content of my relationship. Often I felt like my girlfriend would nag too much, was obnoxious or didn't take enough initiative. These are things I never felt like talking about as I feel that it's not in my position to ask her to change herself.
One year ago I graduated college and started my first job - she still has to study 2 years. The job requires a long traveling time & brings a lot of stress with it at times though, so during evenings or weekends I'm often feeling tired & don't feel like doing anything.
Because of this and the previous reasons, I noticed I started being colder towards my gf & often preferred being alone over seeing her. Despite this though, we kept seeing each other & acted like there was nothing going on.
Last week though, she finally brought up how she's feeling like we're growing apart and how she noticed I'm often uninterested. We almost broke up at that point but decided to sleep it out first. The morning after, we talked. She explained to me how she's feeling and is scared that we're going to separate. I explained my situation & how stress has been getting to me, so we decided to let it go for then & went on.
Forward a couple of days. I'm still feeling the same as before. I did some minor actions to be more interested and open towards her, but last night she said she's still feeling like we're growing apart and she's unsure if we should continue. I explained to her that I'm feeling impassive about a lot of things and that I've been changing after graduating, which is normal.
This weekend we'll see how things go, but I'm feeling more uncertain then ever and don't know what the better choice is. Do we stay together or go our seperare ways? We still have some feelings for each other, but I'm wondering if we're both just not scared of giving up. Could really use a 3rd parts opinion on our situation. | I've been changing since about a year and my gf feels bad about it. We don't know if we should go on or break up. There are still some feelings, but it might just be fear of giving up (from my side at least) |
t3_xuj66 | relationship_advice | [21/M] My ex [20/F] has been leading me on. | I fucked up the relationship with some drunken shenanigans and have curbed my drinking mostly because of wanting to be back with this girl.
When school starts again her summer boyfriend is moving back to school, and from what I can understand she has no desire for a long distance relationship.
We've talked a few times during the summer about maybe getting back together etc, but she has never given me a definite yes.
She *kind of* agreed to go on a date with me in Sept.
We were just at a music fest thing, it was really fun and awesome, and we hung out a lot. When we were alone we wrestled and she kept lying across my legs...
In the subway station hand-holding occurred, but it was "just so we wouldnt get separated" | Ex who I really want to be with has a summer boyfriend, and as a result doesn't want to talk to me about getting back together out of respect for him (understandable). He's going back to school and she isnt into LDR. She's giving me really good physical indications that might be getting back with me but she isn't making any promises and it sucks. |
t3_v7m0s | relationship_advice | [35/m] My ex-wife is fucking random guys and getting into riskier games, should I be concerned for the safety of my young children? | In January I separated from my wife after 10 years of marriage, we've got 6 year old twins and they now live half the time with her, half with me.
She's recently got into hooking up with guys via app based social networks (Blendr I think), she's not interested in a relationship but just wants to have fun and sex. Usually she'll have the guys come over to her place when I've got the kids. When she first started doing this, a month ago, she confided to me that she was concerned about her safety, I suggested she consider using a different location than her home because it also exposes the kids to any risk, but she went ahead and met guys at her home anyway.
Last night she told me she currently has 4 guys on the go, one came over the night before and she had sex with him whilst another was hiding in the garden watching through the window. Just to be clear the kids are with me whilst this is all happening (as far as I'm aware).
Now for me it's a bit challenging to hear all this because of my history with her: it's still relatively recently that we separated, we rarely had sex and she never orgasmed. So it's clear she's now exploring her sexuality and enjoying her freedom, which she has every right to.
When she tells me about this stuff I just get floored by it, full of my own feelings. She's telling me all this and kind of asking "is this OK?".
So should I be concerned about her and the kids safety? What advice can I give her?
I'm thinking the biggest risk is that one of these guys turns up uninvited and won't leave. Luckily she lives on a street with a lot of good people she could call on for help.
One idea I've had is to send her [this article] which talks about responding to threats of violence. | Ex is regularly fucking random guys in my kids home and starting to get more adventurous, should I be concerned for the safety of the kids & what advice can I give her? |
t3_4grveu | relationships | How do I [22 M] tell my GF [21 F] 4 months, that I really don't like the smell of her deodorant? | I love my girlfriend very much, and everything about her is awesome, including her natural smell. But, the deodorant that she uses doesn't smell good to me, like at all. I don't know what the scent is but right after she freshly applies deodorant in the morning I gag from the smell. I'm able to tolerate the smell of it, but I'd very much rather she use a different deodorant which doesn't smell like the one she uses.
I'm hoping that perhaps some of you could give me ideas of a good way to breach the fact I don't like the smell of her deodorant to her without offending her or making her self-conscious.
Thanks for taking time out of your day to answer! | How could I get my gf to change deodorants without hurting her? |
t3_4ht10b | relationships | Am I [21M] being an idiot for trying not to talk to her [20F] anymore? | Idk if this is the right subreddit to ask but I'll give it a try anyways.
Basically we met on an online game through a mutual IRL friend. We started talking through whatsapp and skype mostly for around 2 months and we got along SO WELL. We would talk/chat all day long everyday, we would stay up until 5-6am chatting and had lots of common interests. I liked this girl and I thought something could happen with her, and she thought the same way.
Now fast forwarding a bit... We met in person for the first time last week, we went to the movies and it didn't go very good. We rushed to the movie because it was late, couldnt really talk or do anything inside and once it finished we left. We talked about random stuff on our way to the bus stops for 5 minutes and then we went on our own ways. After that we texted a bit once we both got home and she told me she didn't feel anything, there was no feeling.
Im not angry at this girl or anything but I dont really feel like talking to her anymore now that I know nothing will happen. My friend tells me Im being dumb and that atleast I should keep playing this online game with her because we both enjoyed playing together.
We also haven't spoke at all since saturday | been talking to a girl through whatsapp for 2 months, we got along really well but once we met in person she said there was no chemistry, now im cutting off contact with her |
t3_3a6uqr | personalfinance | Saving money from mom as a minor? | Asking for a friend who is 17 who doesn't use reddit-
She has about 60k USD in a bank account that a relative gave to her shortly before he died. No one in her family knows about the money but she is afraid that they will find out, especially her mom, who is spectacularly bad with money (spending lots of money of frivolous things, money disappearing, stealing money from kids' bank accounts etc.). The account is not linked to her mom in any way as far as she knows, but is under her name instead (used to be under her dead relative's name? I'm a bit confused as to how that worked out). The problem is, she will be applying to college in the US next year and she is afraid that colleges will force her to use all of that money right away to pay for school.
She would like to save it until after school is over, but doesn't know how to hide it from her mom while also hiding it from schools? She has considered taking it out in cash over time and hiding it but that seems like a bad idea overall? I suggested to her to use a safety deposit box but it seems like there are rules and regulations for those under 18 in many places?
Before she tries anything I thought it would be a good idea to ask here.
I'd be happy to answer any questions as best I can for now. I'll ask her if I don't know anything. | Friend has a lot of money in an account from her relative, doesn't know how to hide it from irresponsible mom or from colleges. Any advice? |
t3_22gzet | relationship_advice | I don't know how to start a relationship anymore. [18/M] | Yesterday my girlfriend, of 6 months, broke up with me. Even though it hurts, when I reflect and look back on it I see that we were different people. But I didn't see this until after everything was over. The thing is though this has happened with ALL of my relationships. I think my problem is I don't know what type of person I want and that I get in the honeymoon type mentality too easily. I can never think straight (at the beginning) and this leads to us realizing we don't enjoy each others company. I don't know what do to. | How do I know if someone is right for me, without being affected by my naivety? |
t3_3j7cir | tifu | TIFU By Trusting Adidas | So recently the adidas yeezy boosts releases like last week (22/08/15)
I woke up really early to try and get a pair from the adidas website. Currently at this point I was kinda poor and my new job was going to pay me until 2 weeks.
So I was somehow LUCKY enough to get a pair! I instantly then paid via my debit card and checked my emails/bank balance and saw the money had gone through.
this was on saturday.
Anyway now its wednesday and I have like £60 in my bank account to last me for the trains for the rest of the week for my work, until I get paid. Everything is normal I goto the checkout to buy a train ticket... but my card is declined???
I frantacially call my bank to see wtf is going on because as far as I was aware I had like £60 yesterday.
The bank then tell me I actually have MINUS - £90!
Apparently adidas randomly tried to charge me again for my yeezys and fucked up.
I call my work to tell them I cant come again. I get a call later saying I have been sacked as I have been late before. | So basically adidas tried to charge me twice for a pair of yeezys's put me into overdraft, and my work sacked me |
t3_2ug59y | relationships | [19M] Unsure on how to approach my crush [20F] | I think I'm a fairly attractive guy, yet I'm totally unconfident when I talk to girls, mostly because I've been cheated or left in past relationships, and that lowered my self-esteem to ridiculous levels.
Anyway, there's this girl who went to the same college as me. We both go to different colleges now. We weren't on the same course, neither did we had the same classes.
One morning I was just walking through the hall and she was walking in the opposite direction. As she passed by me, we exchanged looks, I smirked and she smiled back. I'm not used to this type of situation, specially with a girl I've never met. She's beautiful, and the moment was very movie-esque. I knew who she was, she lived a few miles from me and we were facebook friends for a while, but we never talked, neither I think I'd seen her before in person. Later that day, she somehow found my name and started following me on instagram. I started following her too and from what I saw in her posts, we had a lot in common. We would share likes but I never got the courage to talk to her, as she seemed to be really close to a guy, who would become a boyfriend in like two weeks after that.
As she started dating and I'm not the type of guy to mess with other people's relationships, I forgot about her until she liked my picture the other day. I went to her profile and they broke up a week ago or something. This girl really attracts me and I really want to go talk to her, but I don't know how or what to say. As we don't have mutual friends or go to the same college now, what should I do? I think my best alternatives are to use facebook chat or instagram, but I'm not really good at doing that. Any help on that, or any other ideas? | I've a crush on a girl since we exchanged looks but I don't know how to approach her. |
t3_upugi | running | Can't seem to shake groin injury | I've been struggling with this groin problem for months now. It started when I overdid it by jumping from my normal 3 mile runs straight to 5 mile runs.
I ran 5 miles on March 18th and then again on March 20th and had knee and groin pains on the right side ever since then.
I've tried not running for over a month and it doesn't seem to have made a difference. I've been to two different orthopedic doctors and they haven't found anything wrong with me. I've been given cortisone shots to the knee and taken anti-inflammatory pills.
A friend recently recommended using a foam roller on my IT band and and that does seem to have helped quite a bit. I'm now able to run about 1.5 miles if I do a really good warmup including using the foam roller and extensive stretching.
My knee seems to be OK now. I've been running with a patella strap on that side, but I'm still worried about my groin.
The pain seems to go from inside my groin/pelvic area and go around the outside of my hip down to my knee. I've been icing after runs and then wrapping my knee.
I'm concerned to still be feeling this injury a bit and because I'm still limited in how far and often I can run. Does anyone have any suggestions or input on this? I'm willing to try just about anything to get back to peak running shape.
Thanks! | Overdid it back in March by running too far, too soon & have struggled with knee and groin injuries since. Looking for tips to get back to peak running shape. |
t3_2rl0dj | loseit | Newbie help, feeling down about no progress. | I'm really sorry if I shouldn't be posting this, I read the FAQ's and read a few inspiring stories I found through the search bar but I was just wondering If I could get some help on starting out. I really suck at this and its starting to really get me down.
I'm Female, 20, 5'5" and weigh 185lbs. I'm wanting to lose any weight, just something to prove to myself I can do this. Of course I'd love to weigh 126lbs but I don't think that's a real goal. I think I just need to lose some weight and begin feeling/seeing a difference to make me realise this is possible and I'm not gonna feel like this forever. I don't wanna put a date on anything, there's no rush and I'd rather do this properly no matter how long it takes.
So a little about me and my diet / exercise.
- I find it hard to run because I'm short of breath and it really hurts my bust even with a sports bra (36 E bust). I kinda feel like a tool when running too because I'm just so crap at it.
- I've got an exercise bike and bicycle but I find I get bored and end up resenting both of them. I also kinda kick the hell out of both and end up cycling for x amount of calories burnt.
- I'm terrified of the gym because I'm covered in stretch marks all over and I'm just shy. Stupid I know.
- My diet consists of drinking only water and consuming 1,400 calories at max a day. I think I'm doing something wrong.
**So what's the best way to start?**
Would walking everyday really make a difference?
Should I be drinking something else other than water?
Any tips for not getting bored with exercise or to help running?
Any exercises that are actually better to be doing when starting out?
I don't know, just anything at all would be such a huge help. | Overweight female wants to lose weight. Whats the best exercises I should be doing to not lose motivation and see results? |
t3_1jx7c8 | relationships | I[23M] messed up with my girlfriend [21F] of 3 and a half years by making a bad Google search, need advice making things right. | I've been dating my girlfriend, who I love very much, for three and a half years. We've barely ever fought, so I'm having a very hard time figuring out what to do right now.
This started when one of my friends (Male) told me that there was apparently nude photos of a girl we both knew floating around the internet. Instead of following my instinct to ignore it, against better judgement I searched google for "Girl's name naked". I found nothing, and continued on, honestly feeling guilty I even tried. The next day my girlfriend jumped on my computer and google conveniently auto-suggested her search with my previous naked search.
When my girlfriend asked about it, I made the mistake of initially saying "I don't know", then apologizing. My girlfriend is furious, claiming that apparently she isn't enough for me. I understand why she is mad, and think I deserve the anger from her, but I'm having a hard time leveraging the situation. The situation is probably made worse because we moved in with each other about a week ago, and there is no escape. I've apologized profusely, but nothing I say really sound's right. They sound like false promises or bad excuses. Any suggestions would be great. Please, and thank you. | I made the mistake of google searching another girl (naked), and now my girlfriend is furious with me |
t3_10jyiq | AskReddit | Do you see noticable affects on people in use of minor drugs? | my ex, still friends, recently has been acting different, he was the definition of perfect, very handsome, so talented, amazing drummer, and extremly smart, explosively outgoing and friendly, but i noticed recently he'd been acting, spacey, like he didnt care about anything, he got in trouble in school, from his stories not as respectful to adults, and just like he didnt care about anything in general, i then learn he has taken up smoking pot, which generally speaking i really wouldnt mind,but for him, at such a young age, hes currently a sophmore, he doesnt realize the permanent affects that can happen. ive seen other friends of mine go stupid from just the time of freshman to senior year, and it sucks to think this may happen to him. | Smart friend seems to be making poor decisions with minor drugs. |
t3_2zo0zs | relationships | I'm [21M] having trouble with my friend [20F]- can't tell if she likes me? | I'm not good with women. I never have been. Laugh if you must. I really like this girl. She and I have been talking for the last seven months. We haven't really gotten serious, but we've both been kind of flirty.
We used to talk a lot, but not too much. It's hard to explain, but I'll try. She's a very busy woman. She works a lot, and goes to school. I can understand her not being able to text back all the time, or talk on the phone. However recently, it's been getting less and less frequent on the amount of times we talk during the week.
She'll occasionally text me, and then I'll text back, but then I won't hear from her for a good three-to-five days. I just assumed she's busy, but it does get bothersome after awhile, which is why I'm here. She used to text me at least every two days, and she sometimes would call me. Hell, we'd even play Destiny together on the | I like a girl, but can't tell if she likes me. We sometimes talk, but not as frequent, but she still says she misses me, I'm sweet, cute, etc. Does she like me? Should I drop it and run? |
t3_54577t | relationships | Me [29M/M] I feel like my anxiety and overthinking are ruining my life and relationships. | I can't stop getting into my head and overthinking nearly any and everything. Just stupid stuff that shouldn't be an issue will cause me to feel like shit, get frustrated or just doubt myself to the point that I feel paranoid. It's not effecting anything too drastically but I find myself getting really depressed about it. If I complain too much to friends or family, if they think I'm crazy or not.
I don't know exactly what kind of question I'm asking here, but any tips on not overthinking and getting into my head? I wish I could just live in the present for a moment and not dwell on the past or what it could mean for the future. | Overthinking and getting into my head about everything little stupid thing is ruining my happiness. |
t3_35hkuk | tifu | TIFU by giving £2500 to the Nepal charity. | Alright so basically this all started when me and my dad had an argument. Nothing really big apart from me ending up donating £2500 to charity.
So the argument happened because he borrowed money off a family friend to gamble... Know that might not sound too bad because it doesn't but what I found out was that he borrowed £1000 and just lost it all. So now my families asking me for money and I didn't know what to do so I told them that they were on their own. This pissed my dad off to a new level of anger but I didn't really care tbh.
He started to yell at me and said that I was going to hit him, which I wasn't btw but then he called me broke with a few swear words after that; you could imagine for yourself what he said and just to prove a point I donated £2000 to charity and now I am royally fucked! Cause I'm broke. | Had an argument and got pissed, donated £2000 to charity and now i'm broke. |
t3_3cs3pi | relationships | I [20 M] can't handle my girlfriend [18 F] of 2 years when she is on her period | Some background: I really like her except for that one week of the month where she is on her period. Since we do long distance for 2/3 of the year, I usually don't have to handle her anger/emotional issues directly when she is on her period. However, now that I'm back, it's really hard for me to look past this. I can tell when it's soon because she gets very moody and she sometimes apologizes in advance.
Anything I say somehow gets used against me. ie. I asked her if she wants to do something this week. She said "sure, but you'll probably be busy with ____" and listed a bunch of things she thinks I would rather do. If I try to cheer her up, she just gets aggravated. The other day she had a dream I cheated on her, which for some reason made her mad at real me. She also cries a lot. The only reason I try to get involved with her on her period is because she also gets annoyed if she thinks I'm not talking to her enough or reply quickly enough via text (to be fair I was pretty bad about texting her while in college). | How do I handle emotional girlfriend hormones? |
t3_1291a3 | AskReddit | Do you think dueling should be legal? | So let's say two individuals have a dispute serious enough that they are willing to kill the other person over it. If it were legal I think you should have to go to your town's courthouse or city hall and fill out a request detailing the issue and paying like $200 each for the request. If the request is up to par (I have no clue what grounds dueling should be acceptable under) then you wait 2 weeks. IF after 2 weeks both parties still want to settle their dispute this way then they should be taken to a designated facility by the county and given a pistol property of the state for this specific reason. Then let the two people go at it. Age restrictions should start at like 25 IMO.
I don't know where I stand on the subject, but it is interesting to entertain the idea. | do you think dueling should be legal if it was controlled and regulated in your state? |
t3_yd95o | AskReddit | I just had a really pathetic dream about reddit karma. So reddit, what's your most reddit-related dream? | I had a dream where in it I was looking at my own user page. I was shocked by the amount of karma I had for a comment that looked something vaguely along the lines of "I had a gono dono larafafa". The numbers in a dream don't stay constant so each time I looked back it's a different number (eg. 200, 1613, negative). I don't even know how I convinced myself that it was possible. It was a really derpy comment and I was obviously very unhappy about how such a retarded comment got so many upvotes. The worst part is I was going to make a post about that in my dream. I feel pathetic when I woke up.
The backstory on how I think I got this dream at night: during the day I was happy I had 16 upvotes on a comment I did in r/photoshopbattles. I haven't had a good comment in a while (as I'm not committed enough to only posting "Oh, Reddit" all the time.)! I failed as a novelty account holder. | Stupid dream I had about reddit karma (yup, imaginary internet points) and a backstory about why I think I got it. |
t3_322ynu | relationships | My girlfriend [25/F] letf me [20/M] yesterday and today she apologized saying she wants to talk. Could really need some help. | Me and my girlfriend have been dating for the last 5 months and since last month things were not going so well.
My girlfriend just came out of a long and abusive relationship that lasted 5 years and she started dating me not long after. It is important to note that I have little to no information on her previous relationship as "she didnt trust me enough". She can also be emotionnaly unbalanced and can have mood swings for no apparent reason
So thursday, she started talking, saying how she wanted to break up because she felt that she was not ready yet for a new relation. She also blamed me for things that made sense to me while some other things made no sense and just sounded like paranoia (For exemple, she thought my friends were making fun of her, while this never happened).
So we talked for maybe an hour and we decided that we should not date anymore. But today, around 9 pm, she wrote me a facebook message saying that she was sorry, she overreacted and that she wants to meet sunday to talk.
I personaly think that she wants us to go back together, but I don't want to, as I think that our relationship was at an end.
I know that maybe that's now what she wants, but I'm afraid that is what she's going to ask me.
Now here's my problem, she has important personal problems and I'm literally the only one she knows here because her family is in Ottawa (we are in Quebec). So beside coworkers, I'm the only one close to her. Now I really don't know how she will react if I reject her and I still feel responsible for here even if we are no longer together.
I don't want to go back with her, but I don't know how to deal with the situation, considering all those facts. | My girlfriend left me, but now she wants us back together while I don't. |
t3_28buub | relationship_advice | [30:M] Girl I was talking to [26:f] MIA. | Quit talking to me- dying to ask why.
I had been seeing this girl for a few weeks. We talked 3-4 times a day, I frankly got the vibe that she was more into me than I was into her. Last Friday (Jun 6) she came over, spent the night, we had sex, ate lunch saturday PM before I dropped her off at work. She then blew me off Sat/Sun. I asked her what was up with her- that she seemed off and she replied she's been super busy, in the middle of a move, etc. I let it go, and she's straight up ignored me since then. She's been socializing/boat trips/parties since last week. A text offering to hang out went unreplied.
I REALLY want to know what happened- was it something I did? Is there another guy? Frankly I don't give a shit, I have no interest in a relationship with her at this point, but I am so damn curious... She seemed like a genuinely good person with a lot of integrity who was crazy about me- not the sort of person to just slow fade me without explanation. How she handled it is frankly hurtful and disappointing.
Should I call her and ask wtf happened? I've sent 2 unreplied texts, last one being friday. | Girl I had been dating for a few weeks randomly quit talking to me. Should I call her and find out exactly what happened, or wait until I see her in person? |
t3_3apedj | loseit | So I messed up and now I feel like shit [Rant] | Not looking for pity but more to motivate others. I've been doing well losing some weight. Last year I was at 196 lbs and got down to 163 lbs. I was pretty happy but wanted to go further. Over the winter I shot back up to 175 lbs, and decided that my goal weight for this year would be 155 lbs. I was doing well for two weeks (went from 175 to 168) and I was starting to see somewhat of a difference.
Fast forward to this weekend. I ate like crap, drank beer and didnt work out at all. Idk where my motivation went. Anyway I checked the scale and rung in at 173. I feel like a total piece of shit to myself.
That being said all I can do is just adjust and get back on track. | Stay on track guys, you'll thank yourself later. |
t3_4wo3nq | askwomenadvice | Vacation ideas for two mother in-laws. | Not sure where to post this but my wife's dad passed a few months ago. Her mom (F mid60's) has been alone and really has no friends. My mom (F Mid60's) wants to take her out for a weekend trip but needs some ideas. It would have to be low energy and I think having something you do with nature or botanical gardens.
To give an idea of the kinds of things I'm thinking, I suggested a weekend trip to the Northeast to watch the leaves change color but my mom will be out of town for the first few weeks of Oct. Also, since my mom would have to pay for it and we are in California, closer would be better but not necessary. Also, her mom is fairly religious and doesn't approve of drinking, I think Sonoma and Napa are probably a bad idea. | Vacation ideas (non-romantic) for two ladies in their mid 60's |
t3_3dvvhy | tifu | TIFU by stealing a kiss from the girl I liked | This actually happened last Tuesday. I was hanging out for the last couple weeks with this girl I had a crush on, we are both 21 and we live about 2 hours apart from each other so when night started to set in after a long day I find myself waiting with her at the bus stop, it's around 11 pm going back home so she's kinda worried about my long ride. I had already said good bye before so I was not expecting her to stay, but she was back for one last good bye before I got into the bus, I didn't even think I just gave her a small kiss on the lips (our first one) and turned around to get into the bus. I was happily getting into the bus with my small victory when I heard screaming, turned around and saw a guy almost on top of me and she rushing to hug me.
Here's the thing, it looked like she was rushing to the bus, and I just turned around and kissed her, she let out a small scream of surprise but was actually really happy and smiling, guy was behind her so he thought I just sexually harassed this little cute Asian girl, he started screaming at me but my ears were buzzing out from the adrenaline of stealing a kiss so I couldn't hear him, she on the other hand saw this giant angry man lunging at me from behind, so she ran to me saying as loud as she could "He's my friend! He's my friend!" before hugging me and getting in between us. I had to ride all the way home with that guy sitting next to me. | Gave surprise kiss while people watched, almost got myself smacked. |
t3_4adl17 | relationships | Me [29/F] got played by a married [35/M] and I'm feeling really low about it... | A month ago I met someone, and we hit it off. We had a great time hanging out at a party that night, and he wound up coming home with me. Good times were had and off he went. We exchanged a few texts over the next few days, and it became apparent that he was a bit flaky - so I dropped it.
A few weeks later, he messages me and we hook up again with expectations to meet for dinner later that week. He cancels and flakes. I offer an idea to get together a few days later, and get shut down. Whatever, I move on.
Fast forward another week. I run into him at a party, and he makes a comment about how he's trying to ignore me and runs off. I'm taken aback and confused, but don't follow. He eventually comes back and explains that he's married (which he swears he told me, but certainly didn't - he would have gone straight to the auto-reject list) and that I was just an 'experiment'.
I've never been 'the other girl' and would never willingly put myself in that place. I'm feeling really down about this. I kinda liked the guy, and can get over that... but I was played into a situation that I'm highly uncomfortable with. I won't put him on blast, since I'm not about causing drama and rifts among mutual friends... but I'm having a hard time resolving my feelings about the whole situation. I feel like a total fool and a sucker, but I know I didn't do anything wrong. | Had a ton of fun hooking up with someone, to find out that they're married and that I was an 'experiment' in a really hurtful way. Feeling dirty and down. |
t3_fa9jl | AskReddit | How could I annoy my neighbor back? (slight revenge) | I live on the 3rd floor in a very nice apartment complex. My 26 year old, female neighbor has called the cops on me 3 different times on occasions of me either coming home late or there being noise* coming from my place. The first time the cops were called it was 8PM and my stereo was on, no major bass and could barely be heard from another room.
It isn't a major problem, and I could be the bigger person and just hide away trying to never make a peep but I don't wanna'. It's my home, it's how I live and she is over the line. She does not knock, text, call or ask me to do anything. She just calls the cops. (Which they usually don't do anything since we are NEVER loud when they're there.) This is an annoyance and I want to do something to annoy her back.
What can/should I do to get back at her via annoyance?
*It is not excessive noise, just like a few people over laughing and talking. | Neighbor calls cops, I'm annoyed and I want to get her back by annoying her. How? |
t3_3fwsa9 | tifu | TIFU by not logging out of a conference room presentation monitor at work | Happened literally 20 minutes ago. Finally stopped cringing to write this post.
My company has a bunch of conference rooms and each conference room has a big display monitor that employees can log into in order to share their screen. I just had a 30 minutes mock presentation and I'm feeling good because I've been practicing all week. I'm in a rush to get out as the time I booked for my room was running out and the next team was coming in so I quickly grab my junk and ran to my desk. As I get back to my desk, I'm replying to all the messages I've received from my co-workers, friends, family etc. No aware that this whole time I'm logged into the conference room still. This goes on for 5 straight minutes and finally when I get up to grab food from the kitchen, someone from the room I was just in comes out, with a big ass grin on his face, to tell me that I'm still logged in. My heart sinks to the bottom of the floor like the Titanic and I frantically run to my desk to log out.
I'm a very proper person generally and give off that vibe. But what people don't know is that I'm very immensely amused by vulgar, dry and racist jokes (humor is very dark). Naturally, around my close friends and peers, I'm poppin holocaust and abortion jokes. Naturally, as I log out I'm sitting there thinking about all the fucked up shit I could of said and the whole team in that room just watching me message people and laughing, with their judgmental eyes. I sit there at my computer running scenario after scenario of what could of happened and why my co-worker had the biggest cheese on his face as he came out to tell me I was still logged in. After retracing my steps and looking through all my messages I came to the conclusion that I didn't say anything extremely mess up so I'm good.
Then I noticed my email in the background. Then I noticed [this]
Just fucking kill me | Didn't log out of work conference room and now half the business team knows I have an account to xHamster |
t3_16lsx0 | relationships | I(14/m) think my father(48/m) blames me for my mom's death. Is there any merit to this or am I just paranoid because he doesn't approve of me? | My mom died of cancer before my first birthday, they found out when she was pregnant with me but she decided to continue with the pregnancy and opt out of chemo. I never met her but everyone says really nice things. My dad, most of all.
I guess he most have really loved her because he kept everything the same. Her clothes are still in her closet and her wedding ring is on the mantle, little things. My brother told me when we were kids, like 4 and 8, that dad wanted her to get rid of me and fight it. I asked and he didn't say anything. He just walked away. He doesn't like to talk about her, often.
Now he derides most things I do. I waste my time. It's like he thinks I have to do something important to deserve to exist, like cure cancer. I spend too much time at church, God is fake. I read books, those are shit why aren't you learning about computers. I ride my dirtbike, you could die, what a waste of lives that would be. And I know he means mine and hers.
Wheras my older brother got a DUI last week and he didn't say nearly as cruel things as he does to me, he just said that it was on him. Tonight I was late for curfew by 5 minutes (he isn't really strict about it, honestly he barely notices that we live here) and he said I was obviously too stupid to tell time and went off on me for a good ten minutes.
I don't know why, if not for my mom, he doesn't love me the way he does Christian. I am just as smart as him and funny. I make better grades, I am better looking. I am a nicer guy. I just don't get why he doesn't like me. | I(14/m) think my father(48/m) blames me for my mom's death. She decided against chemo because she was pregnant with me. He wanted her to abort me. She didn't and died. And my dad has always been really strict with me and harsh, cruel even. Nothing I do is good enough. While my older brother does worse and he just shrugs. Does he just dislike me or is it because my mom died? |
t3_1wdyjv | Pets | 4 year old cat becoming randomly aggro at her brother | So I have two cats, they're brother and sister.
A few years back one morning we heard a weird sound coming from out window and within seconds a cat fight broke out, they ran over my face and cut me up quite good. We sequestered them from each other and after a few days reintroduced them.. All was good.
This happened a couple other times. We chalked it up to redirected aggression. The female cat would make weird noises at around 5 in the morning and then when her brother hears that sounds comes checks it out and boom a fight breaks out.
Well this happened yesterday morning. It terrifies my son. She made the noise sounding like someone talking in tongues , big brother checks it out, gets attacked and anyone in their path gets attacked.
I know the day before she was rubbing around in catnip, could this be the culprit?
I need solutions ASAP. I know the first thing I should do is contact a vet to see if there's anything medically involved but seeing as this has happened over a period of years now I doubt there is or much they could do other then giving her anti anxiety meds for life. Thing is we had a perfect shitstorm of a week and running on empty financially. Can't really afford any pay solutions for a bit.
She is a member of our family and I love her very much. My wife is 3 months pregnant and I can't risk this happening again and her being attacked and I can't think of what could happen with a baby involved.
I heard things like composure chews could work, of feliway. | Female cat attacking brother cat needs to stop ASAP |
t3_20294b | relationships | Me [25 M] over relationship with [23 F] 2 years, desperately missing physical contact | My relationship with my ex girlfriend ended about 6 months ago. It ended on pretty ok mutual terms and I've moved past the relationship.
I just want to hold someone so badly, to cuddle them at night, etc. Not even sexually (although that would be great too).
I'm not lonely. I have great friends around my often and feel generally happy most days. I am just aching for intimate physical contact.
Due to my work dating isn't really an option right now. And I also don't want to rush into anything when I feel like this.
How do people deal with this longing to be close to another person? | I'm ok, but really want a cuddle at night |
t3_2gke8l | relationships | Am I [28 M] wrong to assume my friend [28 F] is being truthful and is interested? | I have a girl "friend" that I have been talking to for a couple months now. Several weeks ago we were seeing each other a couple times a week and reaching a bf/gf relationship level.
The "friend" has a manageable level of depression and had a two year relationship end just a couple months before we started talking. After we started getting pretty close, she came to the realization that she isn't quite over the ex and said "Sorry for making you think I was ready for a relationship, I thought I was but I realized I'm not"
Assuming this was her being honest, I appreciate the honesty. We still text each other daily, she initiates contact sometimes, and she also responds to my texts even late at night/in the morning so I'm pretty sure there isn't another guy in the picture (The ex is far away and I don't think she'd date him again anyways regardless of the feelings she still has). I am also pretty confident she is still interested in me (at least more often that she isn't) but it is pretty clear she is uncomfortable hanging out with me since we haven't hung out since (about 2-3 weeks now).
I'm not needy by any means, and this girl is a quality girl, so if it means waiting 6 months for her to figure things out and overcome the emotions, I'm fine with that and she would be worth it.
I am also well aware of the excuses that girls tell guys like (I don't know what's wrong with me), especially to "great guys" like me. Am I wrong to assume she is being truthful and just needs some time or should I be wary of her? | Girl says she isn't quite over an ex, but does like me. Is she being honest? |
t3_3dy34y | relationships | Boyfriend [M24] said he wouldn't care if anyone hit me [F21]. | I don't even know what to say or do... How could you not care if someone did that to someone you are supposed to love?
We've been together for a bit over a year, we both have a history of mental illness. I have felt that something about him is... off. That is why I ask him these things, it's not to provoke him or start a fight.
We started talking, and moved on to other subjects, and I asked what he would feel and do if let's say one of his friends hit me. He said he wouldn't really do anything about it and it would depend on how hard that friend hit me. He said the same about his mother...
I really don't want to leave him, but I don't feel safe now. He wouldn't back me up. He doesn't seem to care about how people treat me. He has a really hard time when it comes to empathy, and I'm starting to wonder if he has some kind of disorder. I just don't know what to do. I am thinking of suggesting couples counselling, although I don't know how that would go over.
Can you please give me some advice? Or talk some sense into me if I'm being irrational? I'm a total wreck right now. | My boyfriend lacks empathy and said he wouldn't really care if someone abused me. I don't feel safe anymore. |
t3_r90vp | AskReddit | Redditors with Allergies, what are you doing to manage? Any Pro tips? | For the last 3 years I've been getting more and more allergy prone. A few months ago I finally got an allergy test. Allergic to pollens, to some degree but WAAAY allergic to cats and dogs and dust. We have 2 cats and plenty of dust! Now spring is here and pollen is killing me on top of my normal daily issues. My "emergencies only" inhaler is being used twice a day instead of twice a month. Any tips or tricks that would help me? I literally feel like I'm choking to death on my coughs and my nose often feels full of concrete. | how do you curb your allergies? |
t3_2fvg09 | relationships | Me [18 M] needs advice on a girl in class | So throwing back about a year and a half ago I had a crush on this girl and she actually liked me back (at the time) which I did not know. It ended up that summer came and we had no classes together for the following year. At the end of that year after not really talking much at all besides a few hellos I decided to ask her to a school dance and it was really, really random. Little did I know she already had a date and I was rejected.
Fast forward to the start of this school year and once again she is in my classes. I'm not sure whether or not I should talk to her. I am interested in her but I'm not sure if that rejection will make it awkward. If so how do I approach talking to her? She is kind of hi-strung and I don't really want to put her or anybody in an awkward situation like I did asking her out. | Girl liked me a year and a half ago, asked her out a year later completely out of the blue after not talking to her for a long time. She is now in my classes again and I am interested in talking to her. What do I do? |
t3_1cctd3 | Parenting | How do I tell my 5 year old he will be repeating kindergarten? | OK so, it's kind of my husband and I'd fault, we REALLY should have had him is preschool again he turns 6 in October, a month or so after school stars, he was 4 when he started kindergarten and it was up to us if he would start kindergarten we decided yes, but he really should have waited. He's doing OK academically but the maturity level is definitely not there yet. Anyway his teacher agrees.
Last day of school is in june so it's getting close to where we need to tell him, not sure if we should wait until school is over for the year or what or HOW to tell him. He's starting to get excited about 1st grade because, well of course they're pushing that in school for all kindergartners. I KNOW he will be upset and we have NO IDEA how to tell him gently and prepare him for the other kids, they can be so cruel and I know recess next year will be with his OLD kinder friends AND the new ones. UGH! ANY advice would be greatly appreciated. | kid needs another year of kindergarten, how do we tell him gently? |
t3_346583 | relationships | Me [30 M] with my fiance [27 F] 2 years, considering an open relationship, question about logistics | This is **not** a question about whether or not we should. We're still discussing it.
This is a question about the time and money costs of dating as a man in an open relationship.
When I was single, it was a lot of work and a lot of money. I spent hours and hours on dating sites looking at profiles. Then there were the nights out meeting people, weekends playing kickball, etc. I took a dozen women out on dates over a couple of years and ending up spending hundreds of dollars on food and activities.
As a man in an open relationship will it take more time or less time to find dates? Will it take more money or less money? | As a man in an open relationship will it take more time or less time to find dates? Will it take more money or less money? |
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