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t3_50r3lo | tifu | TIFU by making a random traveler lose his luggage in Germany | **Context** : took a bus from Stuttgart airport to my German hometown, stopped in another town to take a connecting bus.
Coming back from my holiday, I decided to take a bus from the airport. My suitcase was really heavy, thank God the driver was here to help all travelers put their luggage in the baggage hold after such a long flight.
Here comes the fuck up. The bus made a stop in a connecting town (Karlsruhe), where I would take another one in order to make it to my hometown. The bus driver opened the baggage hold and took a smoke break. So I had to take my luggage by myself. There was another black suitcase above mine, I took it and put it on the sidewalk so I could reach mine.
And the bus left. I only realized my fuck-up when my other bus arrived, as the driver asked if the black suitcase belonged to someone from his vehicle. Every traveler claimed it wasn't his, then someone said "It was already here when we arrived, someone must have forgotten it from the previous bus."
***Oh shit***. It was the one I forgot to put back in the hold after I took mine. The unlucky traveler had a further destination, of course he didn't exit the bus and see his luggage being taken out by mistake.
Even worse, this person was traveling to Frankfurt Airport (as my stop was the last before the terminus).
*If you're reading this, sorry for making you panic and likely miss your flight. | Forgot to put back a suitcase in the luggage hold after taking mine, and made a random traveler have the panic attack of his life |
t3_1lgh46 | relationships | Me[17/F] and my boyfriend [18M] have a planned breakup | I'm 17 female and my boyfriend is 18 aswell as being 1 school year above me. This means that in September he moves away to go to university. We first got together late last year and was strictly FWB.
However as the majority of people find out this was incredibly hard and we fell in love with eachother. We both knew how we felt and eventually decided we were exclusive and very much in love. Since we started we had always planned that we'd split for him to go to uni and enjoy uni life as well as being 18. I'm not in any way trying to stop this but I think I'm going to need help coping with this. Any ideas? How do I prepare myself for this? It's like a planned break up with someone you love.. Im going to be lost. | Boyfriend and i break up because he leaves for uni how do I cope? |
t3_2tpvr1 | relationships | My husband (31/m) of one year gets in my face (26/f) when we argue. Advice? | Dated for 4 years before getting married.
Using a throwaway because he uses reddit.
---
It's basically the title. We get into arguments like most couples do. He has never gotten physical with me. Once it gets heated, I'll start ignoring him by not responding. I do not like yelling or someone yelling at me. Nearly every time we have a larger argument, he will get in my face. He doesn't touch me but will get right up in my face, talking sternly. Not really yelling though.
Regardless, it makes me upset and I don't like that he does it. I tell him every single time and even remind him after we have cooled down to please not do that. I do not like it. He says sorry but then seriously just forgets or doesn't care the next time we argue. We really don't get into arguments too frequently. Maybe once every few months. Once a month at absolute most. I don't know exactly. I do admit that ignoring him seems to be pressing his buttons, but that's only because I don't want it escalating.
Is there anything I can do or say to make sure this doesn't keep happening? I really hate it and it doesn't seem to get through to him. | Husband gets up in my face when we argue but is not violent. He's not seeming to listen that I don't like it. |
t3_4e1ym3 | relationships | My [25M] overall mood and happiness revolves around my love life. If I'm in a healthy relationship I'm on the top of the world. If I'm single I always feel a huge void and can't genuinely be happy. How can I be single and happy? | Here is a link to a recent post I made for reference:
Before anybody mentions seeking professional help, I know this is a possibility for me. However, I'd like to save that for a last resort if I can't manage to work on things myself.
It's been less than 48 hours since my most recent breakup and I am single yet again. I know I need to figure out a way to be happy single and to love myself before I can love somebody else. The thing is, I don't know how to do that.
In the last couple days I've reached out to a few friends and old ones to meetup sometime and initiate something. However, no matter how much fun I can have with friends, at the end of the day I'll still feel that big hole missing, someone I can be happy with, someone I can spend time with and take care of and love, and it brings me down.
How can I 're-wire' my brain to be happy without a significant other? | Same as title. |
t3_2yhy7g | needadvice | What's the best, polite and subtle way I can tell a bitch to go and fuck herself? | So I do rowing and at my school we have a party after the rowing season has finished and it's incredibly popular. Being a senior I am allowed to bring a +1. There's this girl who I'm not really friends with (we're good acquaintances) who naturally wants to go. However, I despise her, she's annoying as hell but I keep that to myself and am polite to her. Now here's where she really annoys me: she has the audacity to say to me, and I quote "guess who you are taking to the rowing party? ... Me!" I politely told her I was still deciding between people. I am definitely not taking her so how's the best way to tell her to go fuck herself as politely and subtly possible? Sorry for the long post. | bitch thinks I'm her best friend/will to whatever she wants, I want to tell her fuck off |
t3_31dyp0 | relationships | Is it wrong if I [20M] an slightly bothered that my gf [19F] sleeps in the same bed with her bestfriend [20M] (who is a good mutual friend)? | Sorry for the amount of reading first off.
Okay I've known my girlfriend for 5 years before we started dating, we're best friends, and she's also known B for a little less then she's known me.
So we started dating 3 months ago, and everything is going great, I have so much trust in her, and I also trust B as well, but I still can't help but let it slightly bother me that they sleep in the same bed.
So she's on her spring break right now, so she came to stay with me monday-thursday, then she had plans to hang out with B on friday, so she left thursday night to go sleep at his place, and friday (which they planned). but after they made their plans, I asked her to come over Saturday to hang out, see a movie, and spend the night.
She seemed frustrated with me, and she said "I want to keep it fair, so I stay at each other's houses the same number of days, which I guess in a way makes sense, but I'm her boyfriend shouldn't what I say mean something? Because she said " well B asked me to stay the night first". Actually I asked after they made their plans for Friday night only.
Plus a little something extra, when she's over at my place, her phone is always charged and her and B text, and she calls him at least 3 times during the day just to talk, even while we watch a movie or TV, but when she's there she says her phone is always dead, and when I do get a call through, she lets me go because they're watching a movie.
So my question is am I wrong for being bothered because it's for 2-3 days? | GF sleeps in the same bed with her guy best friend. always goes out of the way for him when she's over, and when she's there I'm "swept aside". |
t3_19ci9e | pettyrevenge | Co-worker is the anti-grandma who nobody likes and thought she could get away with pushing me around. | I work at a major retail department store and we have daily sales goals. I'm only there for, like, 6 hours so I'm cleaning the floor and doing register whenever a customer comes up to the counter. Fast forward to the middle of my shift and apparently I took one of her "holds" from a customer without giving her credit for it. Well, excuse me for not waiting the 15 minutes for you to help the other customer while mine just sat there waiting for your slow and dumb ass. Co-worker calls my manager to complain that I stole her hold when I actually wasn't trying to steal it, just give the best customer service. So she goes to lunch and is like "maybe you could ring for me since you took the hold" and I said "sure give me your number". She goes to lunch and comes back and I lied and actually took every customer under my own name. She got no credit for being a whiny baby about a sales goal. She is constantly doing these rude things to people and she and I have had our own problems so she wasn't going to boss me around. She can have fun not meeting her sales goal and having my manager ask her why :) | Co-worker complains that I stole her items for a customer that were on hold when I was trying to get the customer in and out of the store while she was catering to someone else. Asked me to ring so she could meet her sales goal, said yes, but I actually lied and took all the customers under my own name. |
t3_14jcez | relationships | My Dad (M48) Bought Me (F23) a kindle for christmas last year, and instead of telling him it broke i told him it was stolen... should I fess up? | Should I tell my dad, whom I have known for 23 years, that the kindle he bought me last year for Christmas broke? The kindle he bought me accidentally had something heavy set on it when I moved, and instead of telling him it broke, I tried to spare his feelings, and told him someone stole it instead. He actually thinks I pawned it for money. I still have the kindle, but I didn't want to disappoint him because he went through hell to get it for me, since I really wanted it. I still do want it, but I feel really bad it broke, and I loved my Kindle. so it wasn't like I'm some rich kid that doesn't appreciate the things my parents buy me. | PARENTS BOUGHT ME A KINDLE. I ACCIDENTALLY BROKE IT, SHOULD I TELL MY DAD THE TRUTH THAT I BROKE IT, INSTEAD OF TELLING HIM SOMEONE STOLE IT. |
t3_36tme4 | dogs | [HELP] Parents and cats don't want a dog, but ever since my cat died, I'm really lonely here. | My cat died last year, and because she was my closest friend in my house, I've been pretty lonely when I am not out of the house or with my boyfriend. I really want a new pet, and I would prefer a dog, because I want the companionship and positivity that a dog can bring into someone's life. Currently there are two cats still living in my house, but they like my parents and don't pay much attention to me. Our cats are probably about 13 years old and they are not open to new people or animals in the house, in fact they even pee around the house if someone they do not know takes too much of my mother's attention. My mom originally said the cats are the reason we cannot get a dog, but I talked to her about it more, and found out that she, herself does not want one, because she thinks a dog would be messy (although I think our cats are messier than a trained dog would be.) I am 18 years old, and not making enough money that I could move out of my parent's house, otherwise I would do that and get a dog. I have the time and capability to take care of a dog. I'm really frustrated, because I feel like I will have to wait until I am out of college before getting a dog, and that will take around 6 years. Does anyone have any ideas? Isn't there anything I can do so I can have a dog now? Does anyone know how I could get my mom's old cats to get along with a new puppy? I know it sounds silly, but I've waited a year for myself to stop missing having a pet, and it's just gotten worse! | I need help figuring out how to convince my mom to allow me to get a dog even though our cats are old, grumpy, and territorial. |
t3_3b3rrs | weddingplanning | Is anyone else rocking a single ring (no wedding band)? | My FH had my ring custom made and the band is an odd shape. It would be difficult to add a wedding band to, and I think adding anything to the original ring would detract from it. He was worried that I'd be upset at only having one ring but I'm actually thrilled--for whatever reason I really like the idea of my single (gorgeous) engagement ring.
I only recently realized how common the two ring tradition is. For a long time I didn't even know it was a thing, I thought your engagement ring just became your wedding ring once you were married. So even though I'm really happy with my single ring, I'm curious, do many people do that? Or does everyone pretty much go with the engagement/wedding band combo? | Curious about other people's ring setups, does anyone rock a single ring or do most people have separate engagement/wedding bands? |
t3_2iizfl | relationships | I [24 M] was introduced to my roommate's [25 M] crush [23 F] and she's more interested in me. | Had a party two weeks ago. Roommate brings over girl he's been crushing on since summer. I wasn't really hitting on her, but the girl and connected pretty well. Roommate gets drunk and tells me she's fair game when her and her friends leave.
Since then we've gone on two dates, and he discovered this last weekend. He gets blackout drunk to the point of belligerence, calls me selfish, self-absorbed, and ultimately victimizes himself.
I realize I'm in the wrong for not telling him about the date, and I plan to apologize for that. But if he was never was in an intimate relationship with her, should I really feel that bad? | Roommate introduces me to crush, her and I hit it off, he's now pissed. |
t3_1w81tw | relationships | ONS text me [20M] saying she thinks she was spiked and has a bf. How do I reply? | Had a one night stand with a girl, we were both drunk and came back to mine. We had sex and she left.
I got a text saying roughly "think i was spiked last night, what happened? please keep this to yourself. I love my bf :("
Well, I didn't spike her (I wouldn't be posting here if that was the case!) but I'm not sure how to reply, do I just tell her we had sex? I'm sure she's figured that out. And for the record she wasn't acting like a spiked person.
Was considering replying simply with "well you cheated on your bf and should tell him" but that probably won't achieve anything (although it could potentially avoid a few angry calls from him - and oh yeah I don't know either of them). | had a ons, got a text off her saying "think i was spiked, please keep this to yourself, what happened, i love my bf :(" and i'm not sure how to/if I even should reply |
t3_qyebo | AskReddit | What is your best "WHEW that was close" moment? | When i was 17 i believe, i use to climb out my bedroom window onto a mini roof of my house to smoke cigarettes to avoid my parents catching me. One day it was snowy outside, and this mini roof had maybe a 1 inch coat of snow. I went out in flip flops (GENIUS), and lit up my cig. I went to move my foot and slipped, proceeded to slide down the whole roof, and literally stopped in a seated position with my feet dangling off the roof. I look down and realized if i had kept going, i probably would have split my balls open on the fence 20 feet below or something. I would have been seriously injured no matter what. WHEW that was close! Needless to stay, i stopped smoking cigarettes on my mini roof. | smoke cigs on 20 feet high mini roof, slip and slide down roof in snowy weather and somehow stop just before falling off the edge. stopped smoking cigs on the mini roof |
t3_51v353 | relationships | My [19F] with my friend [19M], he didn't accept my payment for my concert ticket | My friend, "Jerry", recently bought 3 concert tickets priced around $120 each. I thought Jerry was paying for his own ticket as well as Angela's (the concert was on the day of her birthday). When I tried to pay him back, he told me it was on him.
The price of the ticket bothers me, but I feel like a hypocrite. I've paid for friends' concerts tickets at similar prices (around $130 - $150) or paid for tickets to amusement parks. However, with these friends there were many occasions they treated me because I had literally no money to go out with them. Because of this, I don't feel like I created any sort of imbalance.
For a bit of background, Jerry and I "dated" about three years ago. He was really into me. It was a very middle-school-like relationship and we never did anything physical, so a few months after we broke up we became friends again. I don't think he has feelings for me, but I am wary about accepting this gift. I tend to treat my female friends occasionally and they treat me, but with males I split everything evenly. I never treat him to anything, so I don't want to take advantage.
I've tried sending him money with a message somewhere along the lines of "I know you wanted to pay for Angela because it was her birthday but here's my portion of the money" but he just told me not to worry about it.
So how do I better phrase that I want him to accept the money? | I tried to pay my friend for a $120 concert ticket, he told me not to worry. I don't want to accept this gift because I think it would create a weird imbalance, especially considering he used to have feelings for me. |
t3_wqmdp | AskReddit | Through out my childhood i was always known as the "fat kid". I just hit 200 pounds, hard work does pay off. Reddit, what was your biggest accomplishment in the past year ? | Let me start off, Junior year of high school i weighed over 230+ at 5'11. My childhood consisted of McDonald and rolling around from place to place. Being overweight really did suck. My insecurities growing up would constantly eat away at me (no pun intended). I would get harassed and put down all the time because of it. Everyday things would be a challenge, both emotionally and physically i.e losing breath going up a flight of stairs , or talking to attractive females. I knew something had to be done.
Last year my friend convinced me to join the wrestling team, and it was the best decision i've ever made. It turned my life around. I hit 200 pounds today. Over the course of a year i lost over 30 pounds and turned most of it into muscle. I worked my ass off and im proud. I stayed after school almost everyday and ran and worked out by myself. I no longer jiggle violently when i walk down the street, nor do I run out of breathe going up a flight of stairs. You have the ability to do whatever the fuck you want, the rewards and the consequences are in your hands you just have to reach for it. It really does make a difference when you work hard for something you want. So now tell me, what accomplishments have you worked hard to reach? | Worked hard towards losing weight and succeeded. |
t3_52pqyy | relationships | I [17M] made my brother [6M] cry and my mother and sisters are furious with me. | Hi, so I want to keep this short as possible because my mother and sisters are pissed.
My brother hurt his knee earlier today at school and I did not know how bad he hurt it. I tapped his knee as a joke and he started to cry and he was calling for mom. mom got all angry and asked what I did, she sent me to my room. My brother apparently dislocated his knee or something like that earlier and has some sort of brace on or something under his pants.
According to him it's really sore, my sisters and mother are all angry at me and I don't know what to do | made brother cry |
t3_51chdi | tifu | TIFU by not mowing my backyard for 3 weeks | For several weeks, I simply didn't mow my lawn. Simple as that. Never, *Never* do that. You're gonna have a bad time.
I have an electric lawn mower, and it can get through my front yard on 1 charge with ~%25 left. My backyard is the same size, without a driveway, so I often have to charge before finishing.
This was not even close to a 1 charge job.
Before I even get from my backyard gate to the compost bin in the back corner, a yellow light started blinking on it, and the mower stopped. I had no idea what this was, and it turned out to be that the blade couldn't turn due to the clippings being so densely packed in that they reach down to the blade. I had to rock the mower back and forth until the green mulch falls out of the mower.
Some of you may be under the assumption that I have nice green grass that grows tall. You would be wrong. It is a very weedy, very tall rectangle of plant matter.
After making it 1 time around they yard and back again, the last stretch of generic plants, the mower had a red light. Usually, that means the battery is low, but this is exactly what a yellow blinking light means, but worse. It was a very dense area, and after dislodging the plant matter and going back again, I made it 1 foot before the light was red again. I was trying to keep going, and I felt like Scotty was on my lawnmower saying "I'm givin' 'er all she's got captain!"
It took 2 hours, including charging, to finish it. I started at 7 PM, so when I was done I had the headlights on (Yes, the mower has headlights) I don't think the mower likes me anymore. | I had a way overgrown yard that was an extreme pain to mow, and took 2 hours. |
t3_2cvnke | relationships | I [20 M] am seeing flaws in my gf [20 F] of 1+ year after becoming closer to a friend [20 F] | Backstory: The friend, Jessica, [20 F] has been in my friend group for over a year, but I have only recently gotten the chance to talk to her one on one and share experiences. Been dating gf, Emily, [20 F] for a year and a half, starting some time after meeting Jessica.
Only recently have I had the chance to have deeper conversations with my friend Jessica, and we basically instantly connected on various things - guy/girl preference, things we would and wouldn't do, etc. She's very naturally attractive, and I have started to compare her to my gf, Emily, with looks and mostly everything. This, of course, has caused me accentuate Emily's flaws that Jessica does not have. To make it worse, she confessed that she would totally date me if I were single and, well, she's my type. She had been thinking about it recently too.
I have also recently experienced friends breaking up from around the same time Emily and I got together and have started putting things into the bigger picture - where I'm going in life, what I value, etc.
I am very aware of the different relationship mechanics - the grass is greener on the other side, the honeymoon phase, the chase is better than the catch, everyone has their flaws, yada yada. I'm just wondering how people can deal with these potentially poisonous things; I don't want to lose hold of a sobered mind when making these decisions.
Emily and I go to colleges that are close to each other, while Jessica goes to a college a bit farther away.
It has certainly helped to get this into writing, thank you for any advice. | Have a gf, but might be falling for a friend. How do I make a decision while not being blinded by the allure, the chase, and the excitement? |
t3_1hjhw9 | relationships | My ex [25/M] and I [24/F] have been broken up for 8 months. We only dated for 3. He still calls me crying. | Alright so me [24/F] has been broken up with my ex [25/M] who I dated for only *3 months* is a little confused as to what to do.
I broke up with him because it just wasn't working out. No hard feelings, he didn't do anything to me. I didn't do anything to him. Hes a very sweet nice guy. I just wasn't into it, I let him down as gently as could be. He also doesn't speak my first language, so our communication was a bit tedious.
But he still calls me crying! Literally. Hysterical. He must text me every month at least twice (and I do not respond at all to any of his messages) and tonight which has marked 8 months being broken up he called me hysterical crying. I think he may have been drinking but im not sure. Had I known the number (I haven't looked at his in so long so I didn't know it was him) I wouldn't have answered.
Now he says he wants to die, hes crying, hes crazy upset... I don't know what to say. I stay as long as I can on the phone to calm him, but he is just.. hysterical. I don't know what to do.
I have had a new boyfriend for 6 months. I have no interest in ex. I also don't want him to harm himself or be stuck on this for so long. I don't know what is going on with him.
Help. | Ex of 8 months who i've dated for 3 is still hysterical and upset over the loss of our relationship. I dont want him to go crazy. What do I do? |
t3_2e3u2d | relationship_advice | Should i (22m) stick around or not? | I live with my "ex" of 2 years that has broken up with me about 3 months ago. I know she was actively on dating websites(okcupid for sure) so i was sure there was no point in even trying to be with her. I figured i would just try to move on and we can live together until our lease was over. However, we still sleep in the same bed, and she does not want me to sleep in the spare bedroom. She used to be gone from friday until monday every weekend, and now she is spending her weekends with me cooking and hanging out. I have not really met anyone i like online, and her being so sweet again has me wrapped around her finger, but i am afraid i might be doing something stupid by wanting her back? When we were together before the fallout we were impossible to seperate and had the best time together. I am hoping we may have just been together too much and needed to establish some alone time? Thanks in advance. | My ex/roomate(22f) that was so sweet before our falling out, is acting like my gf again? |
t3_44jgpk | relationships | Me [30 M] with my Girlfriend[34 F] she is out with a former lover who I caught her messaging at christmas - need advice regarding how to help her daughter after breakup | A few weeks ago I caught my girlfriend(18 Months) messaging a "former lover" as she calls him messages about wanting to be "seduced" by him this year. I was angry but she promised never to contact him again - ok fair dos and I let it go, she apologised, grovelled etc and said she didn't want to be without me and it would hurt her daughter to lose me from her life.
Today she was due to go out on the piss with her work colleagues so I took her in to town, gave her some cash and dropped her off then I went to help her brother sort stuff out in his failing restaurant(I work for free and am sorting accounts and a home delivery service). I got home and was watching netflix when a message popped up from him saying he was running late and would be there soon.
I have sent her a message saying: "I hope you're having a great night, call me when your done and i'll pick you up :) x" to keep things "normal". I tried to call her but it rang 8 times then cut off and now it just goes straight to answering machine.
Heres what will happen: If she rolls up in a taxi i'll ask why she didn't call, if she says battery is flat i'll check. If she calls for a lift I will pick her up.
I WILL break up with her, I will call her daughters father and tell him he needs to be there for his daughter more than usual(we are very good friends). I will call her sister-in law tomorrow and tell her that her daughter might need a lot of looking after and that i've told her father this too(I won't mention anything else)
I think i'm going about this the right way can you suggest anything else I can do - preferrably to make her daughters life a little bit easier(she likes me and told me it was good having me around) | Girlfriend is cheating on me tonight, what can I do to make breakup easier on her daughter [7 years old] |
t3_hf9u7 | AskReddit | Odd protrusion on side of forehead! WTH is it? | Ok - so I have an (ugly! :P) cousin that has a problem - he's been to see several doctors, had a CT scan and an MRI taken and none of the doctors have an idea of what the problem is and are telling him not to worry.
Anyway, here is what he told me:
>I took one picture at the apartment and one about an hour later at the hospital.
>It had completely disappeared about 6 hours later. This is approximately the 10th time it has occurred since it first happened about 5 months ago. It never lasts longer than 12 hours. This time it was the largest it has been. Perhaps double the size of the previous largest. It is hard to the touch. It is not painful.
>The doctor, radiologist and neurologist said that they haven't seen anything to worry about in the CT Scan or MRI. No mass or anything of that sort, However, they are at a loss to determine what is causing this. Nonetheless, the doctors say i should not worry.
Well...obviously he's not satisfied with that answer. So....I told him I would turn to the Reddit community for a prognosis.
Here are photos he took of the (alien?) protrusion (parts of image blurred to hide his (ugly?) face:
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Any help would be appreciated. | cousin has ugly protrusion on side of forehead, size of pinkie! WTH is it? |
t3_4c7by5 | relationships | Fianceé [23F] is upset I'm not waiting for her to go to my [24M] family member's wedding | Throwaway because some of my family members know my main account.
So I have been engaged to my wonderful fianceé for approximately 6 months, and we'll be getting married next year.
Recently my cousin who lives far awag away from where we lived got engaged as well! We were very excited and he will be getting married much sooner than us, in the summer of this year. My fianceé and I, and the rest of my family were invited to a small ceremony for the bride and groom along with the wedding, and also the rehearsal dinner the day before the wedding. I told my fianceé about the date and about the rehearsal dinner, and her initial reaction was very down. I asked what the issue was and she said that work would be problem for her, as the rehearsal dinner is on her last day of work (she works at a school). I asked when she was done on that Friday, and she told me she would be done at 630pm. She then said that after she was done at work, we could make the 9+ hour drive to the hotel the rest of my family is at.
I responded that I was upset I would be the only family member missing the rehearsal dinner, and we wouldn't be arriving in town for the wedding until 3-4am the day of the wedding if we drove. I asked if there was any way that she could take the day off and she said no, and that we needed to come to a compromise on what we wanted to do for this wedding. I'm stumped, because I know my cousin will be upset if I can't make the rehearsal dinner and get a chance to talk with them (as their wedding day will be chaotic) so I'm unsure of what to do at this point. | My fianceé can't take the day off of work for a rehearsal dinner, wants to go to the wedding but I'll miss the rehearsal dinner |
t3_4o1195 | loseit | Sharing some data to prove it's okay if you fall off the wagon. (I did, twice!) | F 27 4'11'' SW: 191.6 CW: 156.8 GW: 100
Two years ago, I hit a number on the scale that was terrifying to me, so I downloaded myfitnesspal and tracked what I ate. I lasted about a month and gained 20+ pounds after I stopped, hitting an even higher and scarier number!
A few months later, I tried working out. I don't think I even made it a month. The weight and a little more came back.
The third and final time, something in me snapped. (I was so close to hitting 200 pounds. Nopenopenope) I took baby steps. I stopped drinking sodas, I started drinking a lot of water, I fixed some not weight related issues that were bringing me down (hair and skin), for a while I just tried to make healthier eating choices without tracking. In Feb I did WeightWatchers for 12 weeks (FANTASTIC place to start!) Now, I'm tracking calories with myfitnesspal. I eat around 1200 a day. In the past few weeks, I've started exercising. I've found that I actually enjoy running, so I'm doing the C210K program. I joined a gym with an indoor track because running with humidity was not fun. Plus it has wifi, so I can stream music!
Anyways, the | If you fall off the wagon, you can always get back on. Making small changes one at a time helped me finally stay on. |
t3_xmo5u | AskReddit | Reddit, I need help deciding on whether to take this job or not! | Dear Reddit,
I'm going into my junior year at Michigan State and I am facing quite a dilemma:
I got hooked up with this incredible job as a bar back (kind of like an assistant to the bartender - stocking ice, booze, cups,...) at an awesome bar in downtown East Lansing. The manager is around 23 and a really cool guy, the bartenders are smokin' hot, and the atmosphere is great. Sounds like a no brainer, but the only problem is a large one.
The busiest times for the bar are football Saturdays, meaning I would have to work all of them. I would have to sell my tickets and could only attend 1 game in person. I was so excited for this upcoming season and this decision is killing me. However, on those days, I would be making 75 to 120 bucks in tip money for like 4 hours of work.
I don't know what to do. Football has been absolutely incredible the past two years. The fake field goal in OT against Notre Dame, the Hail Mary as time expired vs Wisconsin... We haven't lost at home since I've been at the university! I don't know if I can miss this season, but I want the job so bad! | College football, or awesome job at a bar? |
t3_3q7ucn | askwomenadvice | [16/M]How do I talk to an awkward and shy girl who is into me? | Hello all! I am a 16 year old in high school that needs your help. Not sure if this post should be under /r/relationship because I have only talked to this girl for 2 weeks.
I need some tips on how to talk to this shy/awkward girl. We have been texting each other for about 2 weeks now, and we rarely get to talk in person because we have no classes together, or see each other in the hallway. I know she is into me because her friends tell me she is.
I tried to talk to her last Friday at a football game, but mid conversation she walked away without saying a thing. She later on texted me saying she was sorry for being so awkward and hasn't talked or texted me since, but she usually text me first everyday.
She is having a Halloween party next Saturday, and I don't want to be put in an awkward situation like that again, so please give me tips on how to talk to her. | Give me tips on how to talk to a shy/awkward girl, so the Halloween party i'm attending won't be a mess. |
t3_4d2y2u | personalfinance | Leased car most likely totaled in a hit and run...what are my options? | About a week ago, my parked 2013 Ford Escape was hit by a drunk driver. Luckily, the idiot's license plate came off, so the police could at least run the plates. I have filed both a police report and an insurance claim, and both of them are going through the motions right now. Word is still out on whether the other driver was insured or not...police called me yesterday saying that they were going to issue a warrant. Assessment of pictures by mechanic boyfriend and mechanic friends say that it is likely totaled (major panel damage to front, hood, driver side panels) and a possibly bent frame. Not to mention tons of OEM parts (because its a lease) and electrical repairs. I'm preparing for the worst.
My car was on the final six months of a three year lease, and I was planning to buy the car out. At this point, I fully anticipate all the money from any insurance settlement going to the leasing company. I have a 2500 emergency fund set up that I can use for a downpayment on a new car, but I wanted to know if there is anything else that I can do, legal or otherwise, to come out on top of this incredibly unfortunate situation. Any advice is greatly appreciated. | Drunk drivers suck, don't get a lease, and do I have any other options? |
t3_2vdpu9 | legaladvice | [US/IA, UK, Mauritius] How to file for divorce when spouses are in different countries? | I've had a hard time finding an answer to this, and haven't found a lawyer in my local area who can help me. I'm hoping someone here has an idea of how to start.
My husband and I were married in 2001. He's a UK citizen and I'm a US citizen, and were both resident in the UK, but we were married in Mauritius. We have a son who has dual citizenship and is a young teen now. In 2007 we moved to Iowa because I had medical issues and we needed to live somewhere cheaper.
However, he had issues with his visa. I was very ill at the time and inadvertently made some mistakes with the visa application. This eventually resulted in his deportation and being barred from the US for 10 years. In the meantime, the UK has changed its visa requirements so that the sponsor (my husband) has to make above £X, which he does not and won't for at least several more years. We've been apart now for six years. I'm not 100% positive I want a divorce, but since we won't be able to live together for a number of years yet, it seems we might get to a divorce sooner or later. We're both very tired of our lives being on hold, and neither of us are sure what to do anymore.
So...myself and our son are in the US, he's in the UK, and we were married in a 3rd country (Mauritius). Where would I file? Would I need to get a lawyer in the UK? I live in a rural area and there aren't many lawyers well-versed in international law within hundreds of miles. How does child custody work with international divorces, especially considering he's a dual citizen? Currently my husband does not contribute at all towards my son's care, barring the occasional gift. They do keep in contact via texting, skype, etc. There are no custody or child support arrangements.
Conversely, if anyone is knowledgeable about immigration laws in either country and has ideas how we could legally live in the same country, I'd love to hear them. | Husband and I are citizens of different countries, married in a 3rd country, and live in separate countries. We have a teen who lives with me. How/where would we file for divorce? |
t3_489nsn | relationships | Me [34 M] with my Aunt [38?F], She just now appeared in my life and I don't know how to proceed | Throwaway because my main account is too easy to doxx. I moved to where I live now in July of 2007 and while I knew I had family here, I never bothered to find them and until now they have returned the favor. But last week, my aunt(my father's-brother's ex wife) friend requested me on facebook. I saw she was already friends with my bother and cousin, so I accepted. Well, I open facebook tonight to a 5 message long chain of PMs including pictures of cousins I didn't know saying they want to meet me.
Now, to understand why this is so weird, I have to go into a bit of backstory about this side of my family. They've never been close to me or my brothers. I have never spoken to any of them, and wouldn't know them if I ran into them on the street. The major thing about this branch of the family is that my uncle has been deceased since 2004. And I only learned about it because I googled my name and found the obituary notice. So, why are they trying to communicate with my now, almost 12 years later? I feel really put off by the whole thing, but I don't want to be a dick if they're genuine but I have no way of knowing. Should I respond? And what's the most likely reason they would reach out to me now? | Aunt didn't bother to tell me my uncle was dead 12 years ago. Now wants to meet me and I don't know what changed. |
t3_4pqvgr | relationships | Me [18 M] with my Ex [18 F] of 1 year, she is attending a friends birthday party tonight and its making me anxious. | -Using Fake Names-
Not going into detail with my relationship with Wendy, but while we were together she made out with a guy who promised her weed, lied about it.
Now has convinced herself it wasn't cheating.
Wendy and I were good together little to no problems. Before i found out she cheated Wendy wanted to be friends after we broke up but of course in most cases that is impossible. She broke up with me 3 or 4 months ago now.
She is attending my friends 18th, and i have no idea what to expect from her.
After most the people attending the 18th heard that she cheated they all condemned her and broke off all friendships so its a bit strange Wendy is coming.
All i'm wanting to know is what to expect and what to be prepared for. | Didn't break up on good terms, don't know what to expect or how to handle seeing her at a party! |
t3_xv492 | AskReddit | Liberals, what is one issue you're conservative on and why? Conservatives, vice versa. | I consider myself for the most part to be liberal, but I am conservative on the issue of taxing the rich more. There are some (not many) who inherited their fortune, but for the most part, wealthy people worked very, very hard to get to their status in society. Though the rich can afford to be taxed more, I know damn well that if I was a wealthy business owner who worked my ass off to get scholarships to a good college, so that I could take extreme risks with my life savings so as to eventually make a profit, I wouldn't want to have to pay more taxes. Anyone who was born in the Land of Opportunity that is America had a pretty equal shot at success as the rest of us, and so I do not believe that those who utilize their many opportunities should be punished with taxes for winning the game that is capitalism. | people who work hard to earn their money shouldn't be punished for doing so |
t3_1hevpe | relationships | I[21m] have become very stalkerish over my long distance gf [20f], how do I stop worrying? | So this girl I've known for about 4months is technically not my girlfriend but we're basically there (we call each other every day, we've had lots of sex before she had to move 2hrs away for the summer, she always texts me obsessive texts which I enjoy). I know she is REALLY into me and I'm very much into her but I'm not used to having someone feel this way about me so it's very new and scary. I like this feeling too much and I don't want to lose her.
I like knowing she's thinking about me so I usually wait for her to text me instead of vice versa, but I sometimes start the conversation if she hasn't said anything for a while. Basically, I always need some sort of validation from her to remain in a sane state, otherwise I feel like she's began to lose interest (even if she's only not texted me for like 8hrs). Whenever she doesn't answer a text fast enough, I start getting sad and begin wondering if she's with another guy. Most of the time she's just sleeping or working, yet I continue to seek this validation that I'm still part of her life.
Now onto the scary part...She doesn't know that I know her passwords to her email/facebook/photo albums/anything else because she uses the same two passwords for everything. With this, I constantly go on her accounts to see what she's up to but I've found that about 90% of the things she said is completely innocent and I REALLY don't have anything to worry about, yet I continue to monitor her like some kind of stalker.
WTF is wrong with me? Why do I continue stalking her even after everything I've seen has proved she's doing nothing wrong? Is there an excuse for this type of behavior or am I just a complete asshole who doesn't take her right to privacy into consideration? Is this a sign that I shouldn't be with her since I don't trust her (I'd like to think I'm beginning to trust her)?
Any rants/opinions/suggestions/questions are appreciated. I kind of just wanted to get this off my chest to hear people's reactions to it. | GF lives 2hrs away, she's completely obsessed with me but I'm not used to anyone feeling that way towards me so I'm constantly worrying about losing her, I know her passwords and stalk her facebook/email/chat accounts, I want to know if this means I shouldn't be with her. |
t3_3bl6nt | relationships | I'm [23 F] the other woman to [27 M], [28 F] | For the sake of anonymity and avoiding a wall of text, I'm going to skip a lot of the fine details.
For several months now, I've been dating a man who is in a long-distance relationship. It's escalated from just being friends to flirting to a full on sexual and emotional (he loves me, we're very comfortable and close) relationship, with him making most of the first moves. He has told me he may (as in, as he says, a good chance) leave her for me. We're very close, and I love him, despite all of my friends telling me to run. I know that I'm also not innocent here, either. I want to wait for him, but it's not the most emotionally easy thing. She will also never have any idea about this... He seems to be okay with having two girlfriends. | dating a man in an LDR, friends say run, but I really really like him and want to wait. Probably not in my best interest. Should I ever trust him? |
t3_3qkps4 | relationships | I [17M] am wondering whether me and him [16M] are official or does he take interest in someone else | So I have this "friend" that I basically spend every day with. He's all over me most of the time, kissing and holding hands in public and dates and everything that a romantic couple might do, yet we have never stated that we are official. He seems like he really cares a lot about me based on the questions he asks me and the support he gives me, and feels that I care about him as well. We have a great time hanging out together.
Before the intimacy, we agreed that relationships are hard and tiring, yet now I'm being given hints that he actually wants to start a relationship (gets close to saying "i love you", explicitly states our similarities, doesn't respond "no" when someone asks if we are dating, etc.).
The problem is, I have a small gut feeling that he might be interested in someone other than me as well. I don't see him hang out with other girls. However, yesterday he accidentally sent me a snap that said something like "you're rockin it bb" and also sent me a chat that said something like "nudes or it didn't happen" which didn't really fit into what we were talking about. To me, it probably wasn't nothing but I do know he was talking with someone else while I was chatting him because I could hear the Facebook message sound from his computer during video chat. Again, it was probably joking and nothing, but there is still the slight chance. He also was always protective of his phone, but slacked up a bit around me, if that says anything.
All I want to know is if he feels interested in another girl or not. I want to know whether to back off because personally, I don't want to be a second ball he's juggling in his romantic affairs. Should I ask him myself or scope out his friends? Or wait it out? | Not sure whether friend and I are official or if he's interested in multiple girls and is just sweet-talking me. |
t3_2plhxb | relationships | wife(46F) won't let me (48M) buy piano from Sandy Hook | Someone is selling a piano that's the exact one I've been looking for, but my wife keeps telling me she "won't let that Sandy Hook piano in the house!" Sandy Hook is where one of those tragic school massacres happened a few years ago, it's sad to me, but it doesn't mean anything to me about the piano. We have two daughters one who takes lessons on the junk piano we currently have, and one that will start probably next year.
I want to get it anyway, but then I'll feel like a jerk. Is she being the bad guy or me? I really want that piano. The family selling it is super sweet and I really feel a bond with them over the idea of my kids learning how to play on this special piano. We're married 12 years. She admits it's crazy but she doesn't want me to "strongarm" getting the piano by making arguments to buy it, so the conversation is closed. I told her that now any piano we buy is "tainted" because she would think it could have been "that one from Sandy Hook" every time we look at it. | wife doesn't want me to buy piano because it's from the town that a school massacre happened. Should I buy it anyway? |
t3_43nnjf | relationships | Me [22M] with my _mom__ [50/F], becoming seriously stressed living at home because of micromanagement | I grew up in a boarding home for eight years until I graduated high school, now I moved back home with my mother for college since its close to school, so I value independence a lot. My mom micromanages all my action because I messed up going to college once, but now I picked myself up and am doing great in school but my mom treats me like Im a toddler, ready to mess up anytime.
Personally, I'm a tolerating person so I usually never get angry but once I reach the breaking point I'll get really mad for a short while. Whenever I voice my discomfort to my mom casually she just brushes my feelings aside and now I'm reaching my breaking point and seriously stressed ( I didn't realize until I was getting agitated by everything and becoming a different person).I know if i get angry and lash out, it'll feel great but it'll be damaging to the relationship and I love my mom. How do make her respect my independence,privacy and responsibility for school work without lashing out.
Also I work part time, have an internship and go to school, besides shelter and tuition, I have not taken a cent from parents since I got a job at 18 | How do I get micromanaging mom to respect my independence and privacy in a respectable way, stress is building up in me |
t3_32xy19 | relationships | My friend [25 F] with her [27 M] 8 years, I'm worried about how to help her. | So my friend has been in this emotionally abusive relationship for 8 years since we were in High school. They've both cheated on each other, they've always smoked weed together but he's also done a lot more different things, and they now have a kid together. During their 1st Christmas with their he tried to sleep with another man and got defensive when she found out. He's quit drugs and relapsed multiiple times even after the child was born. She wants to leave but gos back and forth on wanting to and not wanting to giving half ass excuses as to why not as in it'd be too hard. But the main concern there is she's scared that since he is rather unstable that he'll try and beat her or something of that nature if she tries to leave with the kid. So I need help on how to get through to her because she constantly calls complaining and doesn't seem to listen to anything I say. | My friend is in a terrible relationship and need help advising her |
t3_3f80k4 | relationships | My [25 M] confused that my SO [20 F] sleeps in her (my roommates) gay best friends bed. | Mandatory backstory. I've been with let's say Tracy, for 14 months. When we first met, Tracey lived with her gay best friend (let's say Jacob) in a pretty shoddy one bedroom apartment. They slept in the same bed. When I spend the night she would pull out the couch and we'd sleep together. Now we all 3 live in a 2 bedroom apartment and Tracy and I share a room.
We've had a few fights recently which led to her laying with him which made things worse and she would reluctantly lay with me in our room. Jacob is going on vacation for a week and she informed me today she will be 'spending the night' per say with him.
Before anyone say's he's not gay, he's had a few boyfriends and sex with men that I've heard (walls are thin).
I brought it up with her (albeit when we were still angry) and she says she doesn't understand and it shouldn't bother me because it's just like a sleepover. I say it sucks sleeping alone right next door while my girlfriend is laying with some other guy.
Sometimes she gets hot during the night and takes her clothes off (which is awesome with me), but I don't know what I'd do if she did something like that while they were sleeping.
Am I wrong to be jealous of her sleeping in the same bed? I'd also like to make her aware that I want her clothes to remain on, but we've been fighting a lot lately and this topic has been a fairly big boiling point recently and I'm not always the best with words. | SO is going to sleep (lie next to) her gay best friend tonight, am I being over jealous? How can I word a compromise? |
t3_2jnk18 | relationship_advice | (18M)I want to ask her(18? F) out again | Recently I met this girl and we really hit it off. For me, a socially inept introvert, this is the first real time I have strong feelings for someone. I asked out to eat and she said yes but she wanted to bring along her roommates because they were going out at the same time I asked her. I didn't really like the idea but I didn't think I'd be an issue. So we go out and she spends the whole time talking to her friends and things got pretty awkward at times. So it feels like a pretty big dud, but before I left them I told her I'd like to out with just her next time and she said okay. There were some pretty good parts, she talked about places we should go together and when we were alone it felt like a real date. I'm just wondering how long I should wait to ask her out again and if she seemed intrested or she just went because she didn't want to say no. I am being driven insane trying to read what just happened and I can't stop thinking about her.
Also I forgot to mention this but we made out a few days before at a party, but we were both pretty drunk. | I hit it off with a girl but the first date was a dud. How can I ask her out again? |
t3_voo0n | AskReddit | My old teacher was probably a pedophile. What's the worst teacher you have ever had Reddit? | My old computer discovery teacher, let's call him Mr. Roide (not his real name obviously), was probably a pedophile. He would flirt with 14 year old girls, let them sit in his lap while he tutored them on the concepts(he never tutored the guys individually), and generally be sexist while trying to get girls. He tried to get former students as well. One time at lunch, he locked all of the guys out of the room and only let girls come in...while he sat in the room. He remains the only teacher I have ever tried to make a fool of. Luckily he was caught after he supposedly pissed off a girl with a stripper name, she then filed a false sexual harassment claim. The state came and seized his computer as Mr. Roide was escorted off campus in handcuffs.
I have more stories from other terrible teachers if Reddit is willing to hear. | Teacher acted like a pedo. Girl files false sexual harassment claim. |
t3_16kxw1 | AskReddit | Teaching Abroad, Thoughts? Experiences? | Hey guys i'm not sure about this plan for my life and i'm praying about it a lot but I wanted to ask you guys what you thought.
I'm thinking about getting a TESL Certification, or a TESEL or whatever you call it.
I want to travel the world but I have no money, this seems like a cheap way to do what I want and earn some money while i'm at it.
Anyway my general questions are...
Have any of you done it?
What's the best kind of certification to get? And from where should I get it?
What countries have you been to? Are they safe?
Can you earn a lot of money by doing this?
Where do you stay when you go to another country? Do you have to find a place yourself?
What kind of programs would you recommend I should be a part of?
Anyway that's all I can think of for now. I would really appreciate some input here, I have no idea what i'm doing with my life and I want to know more about this field of work. | Thinking about getting a TESL (Teaching English as a Second Language Certification), I need your thoughts and opinion on the matter. |
t3_4iejyb | relationships | Me [30 F] with my Tinder date [33 M] 1 month; can someone clarify 'I'm not ready for commitment' for someone who doesn't understand that statement? | I'm seriously into this guy; thought he was too until a couple weeks ago he started putting less effort into impressing me, rarely texting, etc.
He still says he wants to see me, likes hanging out with me, thinks we click, blah blah, but then when I admitted I was starting to feel pretty into him, he said he wasn't interested in another committed relationship (after a string of bad ones), though we are sexually exclusive.
Normally I'd take this as a sign that he just isn't all that into me and doesn't respect me (he said a few pretty patronizing things about my sentimental nature), but a couple of close friends said that their currently serious relationships started out this way - not so much that they'd/their partners lost interest, but just that they wanted to take things slow and see where they ended up. | Does commitment-phobia always mean "I'm just not that into you" (as I thought it did)? Should I just ask him again for clarification, at the risk of looking like even more of an desperate shit-eater? |
t3_3umo7o | relationships | Found out my [23F] step dad [45M] cheated on my mom [42F] and got the girl [30?F] pregnant. How do I react to this news? | Shit you guys. I [23F] don't know how to interact with my step dad [45M] now.
A couple of months ago, my mom [42F] was crying over the phone while talking to my step dad and apparently my step dad is sleeping with this girl [30?F]. Now it would be another case of "yeah okay he cheated so how do we go on about this" BUT fuck we found out last week that he also got her pregnant.
We don't have proof that it's his but the fact that he's refusing a paternity test makes it so suspicious. I think it's also worth it to know that he got my mom pregnant too and was making her get an abortion. Thankfully my mom said and is firm with her decision that she's keeping the baby and I think the girl is also keeping the baby.
I don't know how to react to this or how to treat him considering that he's doing this to my mom. Should I still respect him or allow myself to be hostile from time to time? I would really appreciate your inputs on this. | I [23F] overheard my mom [42F] crying on the phone talking to my step dad [45M] about his infidelity and turns out that the girl [30?F] he slept with is pregnant. I don't know how to react to this. |
t3_34yqss | relationships | Out of town for work and breaking up with my [24F] BF [23M] of 8 years as soon as I get back to town. Not sure how I should communicate with him until then... | [Previous Post](
So I am out of town right now for work and I don't know exactly when I will be home. Probably by the end of the week. I have decided to break up with my BF as soon as I get back and see him in person.
What I am unsure of is how I should go about speaking/texting him up until that point. I know he thinks I'm being a bitch by not wanting to really talk to him right now or for being distant. I just don't want to be fake and act like everything is okay when its not...
Currently he knows something is up and has told me he 'feels shitty about whats happening'. I really don't know what to say to respond to that.
Should I text/talk him as little as possible until I see him later this week when I break up with him?
I'd appreciate any advice you might have. | Out of town for work and decided I'm going to break up with my BF as soon as I get back. I'm not sure what I should be doing as far as communicating with him. I want to break up with him in person, but at this point he definitely knows something is up. |
t3_2lz524 | legaladvice | Textual Harassment from Web Texting App | Hi Reddit,
A few days ago I received some texts from a number I didn't recognize. The person on the other end wouldn't give their identity, but they knew my first name. I blocked the number. Right after that, I received an explicit picture from a TextNow user handle. I didn't block the number at that point because I thought blocking the number would take care of it. My logic was wrong, because I received another explicit text message last night from the same TextNow username. This is what I've done:
-contacted my phone service provider. They couldn't do anything except keep record that it happened.
-Contacted TextNow, they told me how to block messages from the user.
-Spoke with authorities. They have record in a dispatcher report, but said filing a harassment report would be kind of useless because we don't know who it is.
My dilemma: The officer last night told me they have know way of finding out the identity of this person. After doing my own research, I found that law enforcement can indeed get a subpoena for info from TextNow. Was the officer being lazy? Should I keep pressing?
I'm a mid 20's female, and TBH I'm kind of shaken that someone knows my name. I know information is everywhere, but this person contacted me twice, over a period of a few days. I don't know how seriously to take this. | I've received explicit texts from someone who won't give their identity, but they know mine. Police said they can't get his info, but it looks like they could. What's the best course of action? |
t3_4442kp | relationships | My [25M] girlfriend [24F] doesn't think the time apart we spent long distance "counts" towards our total time together...? Very confused | I have been dating Stephanie for almost one year. Or at least, that's what I thought.
During 3 months of this relationship (July/Aug/Sep 2015), we were long distance. It was me that left, I was assigned something for work and had to move away temporarily. Long distance was hard in the way that they usually are: we missed each other, had some struggles communicating, etc. but we made it through.
The other day I mentioned that our one year anniversary was coming up, and she kind of laughed it off and said that it's only been nine months. I asked her to clarify, and when she did she basically said that the three months that I was gone "don't count", and that we restarted when I got back.
Is this normal? I know it may seem like a weird detail to nitpick about, but I always thought that you're still in a relationship even if you aren't physically with each other. | I just learned that my girlfriend doesn't "count" 3 months of our 1 year relationship because we were long distance, but that doesn't make any sense to me. |
t3_v4pmc | AskReddit | I once punched a kid in the face, and promptly recieved a handshake. What weird reactions have you gotten Reddit? | Full disclosure:
This one kid, we'll call him Noah, was a bully in middle school, and would frequently get violent. It was always just punches in the stomach or arm to prove he was tough, but never much more. Then, one fine day, he socked me right in the eye, and then proceeded to laugh about it with his friends. After school, he was hanging out by the doors and I walked up to him with his group of friends and sucker punched him as hard as my 13 year old self could. I walked away but he ran to catch up and shook my hand and said that he was impressed that I had the balls to hit him back. | Bully hit me in the face, I sucker punched him, we gained mutual respect. |
t3_50w1by | legaladvice | (BC, CAN) My landlord forged my signature to withdraw money from my account | I've been paying my rent by going to my landlord's bank and directly depositing it into his account (using a void cheque of his). This was fine until a few months ago, when I noticed that my rent had been withdrawn twice. I figured it was an error and had my bank correct it. I told my landlord this to keep him in the loop, in case he saw the reversal in his account.
Then the next month, it happened again. I went to his bank because I noticed that it was marked as an automatic withdrawal. They claimed they didn't know what was going on, and I had my bank reverse it again. The next month, I figured this would happen a third time, so I opted to not deposit my rent. Lo and behold, the money was withdrawn again. I went back and forth with my landlord's bank until finally today they asked me to come in to sign something. Basically, it was a form to cancel the automatic withdrawal I had allegedly set up. However, I never set this up, and the signature was clearly not mine.
I moved out last month due to a host of other issues with my landlord, but should I be taking action against him? He's also ignoring my calls and emails regarding returning my damage deposit. | My landlord forged my signature to withdrawn money, and I don't know if I should be taking legal action or filing a police report. |
t3_2fjd3f | relationships | Should I [22M] kiss my girlfriend [23F] less often? | I feel silly asking this, but I just wondered what people thought of the situation. The relationship is going well and I have no complaints but sometimes I feel a bit needy when it comes to kissing.
I have always been a kisser. I love kissing. It makes me feel loved and it lets me show my affection in a way that I don't have to explicitly describe. I will kiss my girlfriend whenever I first see her, before we part ways, at commercial breaks, after cracking a joke, randomly; basically at any moment when we're not doing anything else and we are alone.
The reason I ask if I should do it less often is that, although she always kisses me back, it seems as though sometimes she does it because it's important to me rather than because she particularly wants to. She's never moved away or stopped me kissing her though.
Do you think if I kissed her less often it would be a bit more special to her and she would appreciate it more? | I think my girlfriend doesn't appreciate kissing as much because I do it too often; should I kiss her less? |
t3_wls8f | relationships | [33/F] living with (41/m) who keeps phone numbers of past hookups on his phone | We've been in a committed relationship for 1 year and 2 months. We were casually dating/fwb for 5 months prior to that, and we've been friends for 17 years total.
During the 5 months that we were casually dating, he concealed the fact that he was sleeping with other women even though we'd agreed that we would let each other know if we were seeing other people. I didn't find out about the other women until after we had officially committed to each other, but that early betrayal still bugs me.
There was one woman, "Wendy," who he was regularly sexually active with (sometimes sleeping with her the night after he slept with me). A couple weeks ago, I noticed that he still has Wendy's home, work and cell phone numbers saved to his phone along with a few other women who he either hooked up with or tried to hook up with. It bothered me, but I didn't say anything about it until last night. We had a pretty big fight, and I'm hurt by some of the things he said.
He said that he didn't do anything behind my back when he was sleeping with Wendy because we became physically involved after he had already been fooling around with her, and that Wendy is an important friend to him. He also says that he doesn't talk to her anymore, but I'm starting to wonder about that. He insisted that he didn't do anything wrong when he concealed her from me, which blew my mind because this had been a huge issue for us, which I had assumed we mostly worked out.
I'd like any advice on how to communicate my feelings to him in a constructive way. Is there any way to get him to understand why I'm hurt without another big blowup, or am I being totally unreasonable to begin with? | Boyfriend still has phone numbers for old hookups, it bothers me, what should I do? |
t3_40eli0 | relationships | I [19 F] recently had sex with my ex [19 M] while high and intoxicated at a party | My ex and I broke up about a month ago, mainly doing no contact during this time. I think we maybe spoke once or twice. However this previous weekend, we attended two parties one on Friday and one on Saturday night.
On Friday night I was very nervous about seeing him and tbh I would have rather avoided him completely. However, I heard through my friends that he was leaving as I had made him feel unwelcome, so I approached him and let him know there would be no issues between us if he stayed. We then got talking and got high together. I feel that we had made peace and could possibly even consider a friendship. We texted for sometime after the party, both saying we missed each and was imagining me in his head.
The following night we both attended another mutual friend's party, where I gave him the Christmas presents I bought for him pre breakup. He offered me weed and to get high with him, I assume out of guilt that he did not get me anything. We then smoked together, and somehow one thing lead to another and we ended up having sex. It was completely consensual, he made the first move, although he did stop several times to say we probably shouldn't do this, but then continued anyway. He texted me again once I left the party, offering his friend to sober drive me back to the party so we could spend more time together.
Now I am certain neither of us want to get back together, although it is clear there are still strong feelings of love and lust toward each other. He is now, however, ignoring my messages and has gone back to no contact. I feel extremely used, and while the sex was just as much my fault, and a stupid idea, we can clearly be around each other without any issues. I feel very hurt that he would sleep with me and say all those things and then act like this now.
It appears to me that he cannot repress his feelings when high/drunk but when he is sober tries to do the logical thing.
I am just not sure the appropriate way to respond, should I even attempt to sweep our past under the rug and make amends or just cut him out of my life. | My ex and I had sex when drunk and high at a party after 1 month of no contact, now he is ignoring me and I am not sure how to respond |
t3_2q69be | personalfinance | Considering Buying Solar Panels, and I need Feedback | I will start by providing some background: I am 25 years old, have a bachelor's degree, live in Texas, and make about $65k annually. I contribute $500 a month to my Roth IRA, $440 per month to a 401k, and on average $200 per month into an investment account I play around with (currently valued at ~$5300). I own a home and owe about $148k on my mortgage (my ONLY debt). My mortgage payment is about $1200/month, but i have 3 roommates who cover about $1050 of that. The home is worth $160k currently. I pray that all this information will magically inspire one of you to paint a wonderfully colorful picture about the advantages and drawbacks of the proposal mentioned in the title, and detailed below...
I have been toying with the idea of outfitting my residence with a solar system. I can buy a 6.25KW DC Solar Electric (PV) system through a local and trusted company. They value the system at $19,000. Through a local subsidy/incentive, the cost to me would be $14,000. Add to that the federal income tax incentive, valued at ~$4000 for me, that brings the cost to around $10,000 after it's all said and done. I've read several articles that say that adding solar panels can increase the property value of your home, and also manifest savings in utilities bills. Electricity in my area is expensive. We're talking $0.15 per kWh for an annual total of ~$3,000 for ~20,000 kWh. The system they want to install will effectively cut that usage and the bill in half. To do this, I would want to take out a small home improvement loan so as to not diminish my savings/emergency fund at 3.8%.
My question to you, r/personalfinance, are what are the advantages and disadvantages to this? It seems great, but if it is so awesome, why don't more people do it? Would it increase my home value and if so by how much? Would it be worth doing if I were going to move out and convert this to a rental property (would it add rental value?)? Any and all commentary and discussion here would be appreciated. | I want to install a 6.25 KW DC solar PV system. What are the ups/downs and potential value added to my home value, both retail and as a rental? |
t3_1f4iic | BreakUps | How did you guys (and girls) get over your first break-up? | **FRIENDS THAT KNOW MY REDDIT NAME STOP READING NOW TO AVOID AKWARDNESS**
I was in "that age" (puberty, hormones) when my long time SO accepted a date. It went fine for a while but after a few months she decided "she doesn't want to be with me". My 12 year old self took it pretty hard (I liked her ALOT) and didn't know how to act for a while. My friends being dicks about it didnt help out that much either.
When school started again a month later I decided instead of being a puss about it I was gonna trudge through day-to-day life and make sure I learned from my mistakes (even if I had yet to find out what they were). | sucked at first, but with dedication and motivation you can get through pretty much anything. |
t3_1kvtxy | dogs | Camping | Im going camping with some buddies in a couple weeks. Im planning on bringing my 9 month old (10 at time of trip) standard poodle with me. What are some of the dos and donts of camping with your dog?
Some addition details:
We will be camping on a river, mostly fishing, not expecting much in the way of hiking. This is not (to my knowledge) a designated camping area(the kind with 10 sites ready made in close proximity), more just a really good spot. I havent spent a ton of time walking her off leash and her recall isnt particularly good(she will stop everything shes doing and look at me, responds to sit and stay but wont come when called....poodles), but she rarely leaves my sight and is vocal when she wants my attention. | going camping with a 10 month old poodle puppy who doesn't always come when called. I need the dos and donts of camping with your dog and a way to improve recall and off-leash behavior from "ok" to "good" relativly quickly |
t3_11wuvc | AskReddit | How would you deal with a cat that doesn't like you, even though you rescued it? | My spouse and I already have two very loving cats, ages 10 and 9. They are both very affectionate to us (laps, bed, holding, petting, etc). Selma is definitely the alpha but Beau loves her to death and they'll sleep with each other. Selma has a little more affinity for me, but not much. This could be important.
I persuaded the spouse to adopt a very unique stray that I fell in love with at first sight. About two weeks after getting the kitten home, she (Luna) would have nothing to do with me except for toys and food.
Almost a year later, it's the same. She will come around me, etc, but if I try to pet her, she rolls her back and walks away. If I pick her up, she wants to go back down. TOTAL OPPOSITE with the spouse. Luna will sleep under the blankets spooned up next to my spouse. Spouse can pick her up and pet her anytime and she loves it.
Also, Luna will harass the shit out of Selma and Beau. It's not constant fighting, but she's a bully. We've talked about finding her a new home, but then we feel bad... Spouse is totally aware of the situation, acknowledges it, and I'm not delusional...
Help!! | Adopted stray cat a year ago; cat dislikes me, but loves spouse and stray harasses other house cats. |
t3_3uakej | legaladvice | Rented out my parking spot, but now renter won't pay (Montreal, Canada) | So I'm currently a university student in Montreal, Quebec and my apartment that I've been renting comes with it's own parking spot around the back of my building. As I live out of the province (in Ontario) I had no use for it as I don't have a car so last year I decided to rent out my parking spot to a fellow student.
A friend of mine said that her cousin (also another student) wanted to rent out my parking spot and we agreed that he would rent it out for $100 a month. I kept in touch with him through text message on a monthly basis and we kept trying to arrange for him to pay me for the parking spot, but because of our busy schedules we could never meet up (I was very lenient which was stupid of me, because I thought he was trustworthy, as he was related to my friend).
Before the school year was over and I was leaving the city to go back home, I messaged him so he could finally pay me for renting out my parking spot for the year, totalling $700. He told me he was on vacation out of the city but he could e-transfer me the $700 in a few days when he had money in his account. I messaged him after a few days to find he blocked my number, was ignoring my calls, etc. I even got my friend to try and get a hold of him but she had no luck either. Now months later, my friend got in touch with him and he is saying he doesn't want to pay me because there were problems with the parking spot, and if I want my money I am going to have to sue him to get it.
Essentially, because I was irresponsible and too trustworthy, I'm currently out $700 and I don't know what to do. Right now the only proof I have is the text messages between us which I have saved, and now I'm wondering if I were to take him to court, would it be sufficient enough to get my money back, or is it even worth going through the legal system? | rented out my parking spot, renter is now refusing to pay me the $700 he owes me. Do I sue or forget it? |
t3_3m57gy | relationships | I [21/M] have been thinking of asking out a girl [20/F] I've known since High school. Idk if i should or not. | So I've known this friend since 2009 in high school. She was a very shy person and I was her first guy friend. I've always found her cute and all but i never asked her out. Years later she tells me that use to like me but that was in the past. She had a bf for like 3 years. During that time, we would chat and try to hangout. Her bf didn't like that and she was not allowed to talk to me or hangout. This happen several times until recently we reconnected and decided to hangout our college. The years have been kind to her. She has bloomed into a beautiful woman and her smile is intoxicating. We caught up yesterday and found out she has been single for a couple of months. Part of me was upset for her but another part me was happy because she's single now. More into talking she tells me she tried tinder for the heck of it with her sister. She immediately started getting matches and messages and some she has met and gone a few dates with. She tells me she has been happier than she has ever been. She told me she's on the prowl and enjoying the dating life. Idk why, but after we departed and said our goodbyes, i couldnt stop thinking about her. Part of me wants to ask her out. I've always wanted to before but she had a bf. Now idk if i should go for it. We are close friends and she use to like me before. But that doesnt mean she likes me now. Idk how to start off with showing her im interested. | summary: I liked this girl for awhile, she liked me in the past. She had a bf for 3 years. Her and I are both single now. Should i do it? |
t3_hykl0 | AskReddit | I want to ask Reddit a favor. Unfortunaly I don't have a cat nor is it my reddit birthday. | Ok guys, first of all I'd like to say I'm not in a position to ask this, but I would really appreciate any help coming from you guys. Now my question to you all: I play football in Belgium but our professional level is not as high as I'd like. We have a brand called 'Nivea' wanting to support a sports team giving them 3000 euros, about 3500 dollars, which we could use of course. But it seems we need some help getting those votes up at
We only need 500 votes to be first place! I know it's in dutch, but you need to click 'Stemmen', then say you're a Male (M) or Female (V), enter your emailadres and reclick 'Stemmen'. The next form you don't need to fill. I'd really appreciate the help. | Need 500 votes for 3000€. Click the link and 'Stemmen' |
t3_hxy0b | relationship_advice | just wondering | So, I've been with my bf for about a while now. We live together, and love him to death. he's got 3 priorities: me, cigs, and reddit....only problem is, I feel like it goes: reddit, cigs, me...am I wrong to be a little upset by this? like in general I'm pretty laid back and just yea do whatever you want, I'm okay with it. I like to hang out with him a lot, but I don't want to be overbearing. Anyway, more than once we will decide to go on date, and I'll get ready to go, hair up, make-up done, all dressed up, and..... he's on reddit. 3 hrs later, hair's down, make-ups off and I'm back in sweats and a t-shirt. when he realizes he is like, I'm so sorry, lets still go we can still go, and I have to pretend like I was totally okay with the wait. so we end up going, hairs in my regular ponytail, no makeup, and just a pair of jeans and a t-shirt because I'm too afraid that if I get all ready again he will be back on reddit. any advice? | live with my bf, love him, but priorities go reddit, cigs, me. any advice? |
t3_15x5sy | AskReddit | Canadians of Reddit, does it take a long time to obtain medical services under your healthcare system? | It is commonly brought up in the healthcare debates in the United States that we should avoid a similar system to Canada's because there is a long waiting line to recieve any medical treatment. I've heard people say you have to wait for hours for a simple check up, weeks to see the doctor for flu, and of people dying of cancer because they had to wait to long to start chemo. No one really ssems to be able to tell me where they heard this from. I've read some articles; however, they all seem politically bias, or talk about the theory behind the system and how it should work, not how it actually does work. I'm looking for a more of an average joe, man on the street view. | As a Canadian what is your overall expirience/opinion of your healthcare system? |
t3_1iyo97 | AskReddit | How do I get my ex-boss to pay me?? Or, how can I get revenge on this mofo? | I worked for a guy doing all sorts of different jobs; masonry type work, construction, building and cleaning pools, snow-plowing, catering, etc. He was a sketchy dude who was trying to run way too many businesses, and almost all of them failed. He would just pay me whenever he had money, but eventually I had to quit because I found a better job with a much lower chance of failing.
Only thing is, he still owes me about a month's worth of pay. I worked off the books, and for a while was getting it in bits and pieces, but now he's totally stopped. I call, text, and have even showed up at his house a few times, but all to no avail. I just want what he owes me, but can't really do too much else in terms of threats/demands.
REVENGE:
I know where the guy stores all of his equipment - tables, chairs, tents, bounce castle, etc. but don't know how/what to do without him knowing it was me and getting in a ton of trouble. | Bad boss owes me money, I want either the money or revenge so I can have some closure on the whole matter. |
t3_3uco8v | relationships | I (25F) feel like I have some sort of relationship ADD, can't commit to one person | So I am not sure what is wrong with me. While I'm in a happy relationship I find myself thinking about other guys and getting with them. It's very constant and frequent. It happens with multiple people.
For example I love my boyfriend, but may get a lot of crushes on other guys, it happens so frequently that it's not like a standard person liking someone else while in a relationship. I just can't decide which guy I wanna be with. My ideal situation is to have all of them but I feel like its not very realistic. I constantly feel bad about feeling this way. I feel bad for my boyfriend.
I love him so much but I just can't seem to commit to just one person, I have no idea if this is a thing that can be fixed. Is it a psychological disorder? I thought about it being polyamory but it might be too neurotic to be called that. It's not sex addiction cause I don't care much about sex | can't commit to one guy, constantly jumping from one guy to another, I dunno whats wrong with me |
t3_ja0qi | relationships | How do I break up with a girl I love like crazy? | Throwaway for certain reasons.
Been dating a girl about a year and a half, and do really love her. She is incredible. All my friends love her and everything is going really well.
Problem is, I know she is not right for me. I imagine myself being married to her and having kids and it just doesn't seem like what I want. I am 30 and not exactly getting any younger. Had my fun and starting to think about settling down and when it comes to thinking about that with her, I just don't think she's right for me.
I know I need to break up with her, but how?
How do you break the heart of someone you do love? Telling the truth just seems mean. "Sorry, I don't think I can marry you." Saying it just isn't right seems vague and a cop-out, which it kind of is. Any way I do it, I know I will be crushing her. | GF isn't right for me(just know it in my gut), how do I crush someone I love and that loves me by breaking up with them? How do I break up with them? |
t3_3439g7 | relationships | Me [23 F] with my ex boyfriend [22M] dated for two years, getting out of toxic relationship | For all my people who have been in a toxic/unhealthy relationship I need your advice! I'm just now getting out of one, although I haven't told him because I don't really care what he thinks anymore as I'm doing this for me and my well being. . I haven't spoken to him in 4 days and feel really proud of myself. But still I miss him a lot. We were together for a year and half and the last 4 months has been off and on again just awful.
How did all of you strong people get past it and move on? | Advice getting out of toxic relationship! |
t3_tyhop | AskReddit | A developer wants to build three skyscrapers across the street from my house, what can I do? | A little background: I live in a medium (population 300,000) Canadian city, my neighborhood has a reputation for being a little bit rough, but in recent years has been going through the process of gentrification. It's an older residential neighborhood on the edge of downtown, and it has a reputation for being arty.
Across the street from me is a large (3-4 acre) parcel of land, which was formerly a parking lot for the old hospital up the street which is in the process of being decommissioned. In March, the hospital's lease on that land expired and it was returned to the city. Almost immediately after this, a local company announced its intentions to build a massive medical/residential complex there.
This would be three buildings, the tallest of which being 37 stories (would be the tallest building in the city by far) in their concept design which was released to the press. In addition to this, the building would be serviced by a three level parking structure, and my current quiet, one lane, one way residential street would be widened to four lanes, both ways, consuming most of my front yard and driveway, forcing me to either park on the (metered) street or in my neighbor's laneway. It is completely not in keeping with the rest of the neighborhood, would be extremely disruptive, and would block most of my sunlight.
My neighbors and I have met and we have come to the consensus that we don't want this development. We have accepted that something will definitely be built there as it is prime development land, but something like this is totally inappropriate.
Both this company and the Mayor are talking about this project like it is already said and done, but yet the city planning and real estate services departments are behaving as if they have no knowledge of the project. We've tried going to the local media, but the only things they have written so far about the project are fluff pieces in support of it. What can we do to stop this company from walking in and disrupting our lives? | Company wants to build three (up to 37 story) skycrapers across the street from my house, city hall is providing conflicting information. |
t3_18m3i0 | relationships | 23F 29M need advice! | Hi, I've been with this guy for around 6 months now.
It is starting to get serious, I love you and all that.
Here's the problem though. A few weeks ago he broke it off with me, after our first big fight. He said he couldn't handle having his walls up around me when he was so comfortable before.
I was okay, relationships outside of the honeymoon period take work, but if you don't want to work at it that's cool too.
He called me up that night sobbing, saying he made a huge mistake etc take me back blah blah. I took him back.
Now he has had a stressful week, and has starting picking at the relationship again. I work nights, so we only see each other on the weekend. I think it's good as it makes the time we have together all the sweeter. He has told me he gets lonely during the week, and feels neglected in that I'm not available at 5pm to cheer him up after a bad day.
I'm looking for advice on what to do with this relationship. I love him so much, I feel like I've never had this connection with anyone before and that the relationship has real potential to go the distance. However, it's like every single time he is under stress, the relationship is to blame for some reason. He has also mentioned that he doesn't want to have a long term relationship only to be single again in his mid 30s, even though breaking up is always a thing in any relationship. you just have to take the risk, and take the good and the bad. It's life, IMO.
So reddit, what can I do to instill his faith in what we have? | 6month r/ship is on the rocks as bf doesn't know what he wants. |
t3_ipwfx | AskReddit | Dear Lawyers/law students of Reddit; help a brother out. | Ok. So I tried to cancel my X-box live membership a while back, and it was late at night. Since you can't cancel online and customer support was not open, I logged onto my account and changed the billing address to something absurd that couldn't possibly work. I figured that was the end of it, they would cancel my account when the payment wouldn't process and either contact me and ask for an alternate payment for that final month and then ban me from registering for an account or that they would just say fuck it, cancel it and ban me from ever registering again.
Anyway, I just figured out that neither of those 2 things had happened, and for the last 4 months I have been paying for an x-box live account that had "santa clause lane" as the billing address.
I finally realized this, and since I am out of school right now I went ahead and called customer support and canceled it. Not only would they not refund me for the last 4 months, but they also told me that I would be charged for this month. Legally what are my options for getting my 40 dollars back. | I tried to cancel my x-box live account by changing the billing info to something totally absurd and now I want my 40 dollars back. |
t3_3n8qtd | relationships | Me [37 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] 7 months, is messing around on me | So I have been dating this girl from my work that I no longer work at, she has been talking to this guy which she says is "harmless flirting" but I saw the texts and it was her saying she saw him at the gym and how he should come see her at the local gym he works out at and she tans at, and he was sending nude pics and she sent pics to him that she hadn't sent to me. She claimed to block him on Facebook but I know someone who knows him and they both pop on at the same exact time, she doesn't talk to me as much as we used to, and we haven't had sex in a month. Please give me some advice on how to proceed? | GF sexting / likely cheating, need advice please. |
t3_2qjzfj | relationships | GF [28 F] of 6 weeks ditched me [27 M] two days after Christmas. I don't actually know why. | A new relationship started in November. After a few false starts with other girls, this one seemed really good. She seemed really into me, and was always making a decent amount of effort with me (50/50) in regards to planning to see each other, and in our communication. She was that keen that she requested we made it official on facebook earlier this month. She also paid a lot of money for a weekend away together last weekend.
Then suddenly she started being short around christmas eve. We had planned to spend the morning of christmas day together, but this didn't happen due to her being ill.. We exchanged presents on christmas eve. The short attitude continued into christmas day, and boxing day. She continued to make conversation of her own accord, but then would go quiet again.
Today she dumped me first thing. She read off a list of very generic answers. No future. Nothing in common. I deserve better than her. Different outlook in life. Can't give her what she wants from a relationship.
I was obviously hurt, but I made sure I didn't blow up. I explained I felt it was coming since christmas eve, and that I wish her the best etc.
She then cut me out, no more facebook, no more whatsapp etc. so I don't know what I can do. This was only my second intimate relationship, so I feeling very hurt by this sudden change. I don't know why this happened. I didn't seem to do anything wrong. In fact she said that if I was a tw*t, then it would of made it more simpler for her.
Our paths do no pass in normal day-to-day routine (she is 35 miles away), am I over reacting to a short lived romance? I'm trying to do the whole No Contact setup in hope that she will communicate again.
I hope you guys can advise me, but maybe the biggest benefit of this post is just me getting it off my chest. Many thanks. | She stayed with me through christmas, ditched me after, why?! |
t3_2jjyey | relationships | *update* I [26M] was broken up by gf [24F] of 6 years | original
just want to say thanks for all the replies as most were pretty blunt i understand its what i need to do...
i went over to talk to her today and told her how her words and contact were making me feel like shit and that we shouldn't talk anymore. we discussed our future plans and she told me she was possibly planning on moving out to California (we live in Las Vegas nv) because he had a job offer out there.
she told me that she isn't going to be his girl friend yet though because she realized it probably isn't the best thing to do after a long term relationship i replied what's the difference if you are dating him spending the night at his house and planning to move to a new state with him. but w/e it will or won't happen in 2 months.
all i can say is i'm going to cease contact and try to move on. its still bull shit though I Love her and no one can take her spot in my heart. | going with no contact after expressing myself found it she plans to move to new state with rebound guy |
t3_13xyeo | AskReddit | I shit my pants for the first time ever about 2 months ago. Funny story. What's the funniest/most outrageous pants shitting story you have? | So I was out late drinking with my friend on campus who I didn't know very well. We were grabbing pizza and getting pitchers at the local watering whole and this story was born:
* Get fucked up at happy hour on campus
* My friend invites me to his friends dorm, I have a few more drinks
* Happy hour food starts to get to me
This is when the trouble happens. I start walking back to my apartment off campus and have to shit extremely bad. Prairie dogging like its no ones business.
Its 2 am at this point and I reach our "University Center" where there are restaurants and a ton of people are. I start breathing heavily, run to my usual bathroom and realize that they had shut half of the building down. I run down the closest hallway and it's too late, it had started to smear out. I went in to a close by elevator for privacy and started shitting my pants. But this wasnt a clean shit. I tried to hold it, so i was squeezing the poo out while my cheeks were clenched. It doesnt end there... since I was drunk, I thought it would be a great idea to throw my shorts and boxers away and just cover up with my shirt. I then proceeded to walk home with nothing but a shirt on and poo smeared on my butt. Took a shower. Thought deeply about my life. And never spoke about this event until now. Jesus christ.
p.s. I work in the building I shit in | got drunk, messily shit in a university elevator, walked home naked |
t3_1lpzpl | relationship_advice | [24/m] bringing up to girl I'm seeing [35/f] that I'm dating people casually | Hello, about a month ago I went on a date with someone from OkCupid and we're still seeing each other. I had planned on casually dating other women but never said anything to her because I wasn't actually dating anyone. Now I'm planning other dates and I want to be upfront and honest with her about it, I just don't know how she'll handle it.
She brought me to a concert and we saw a band that she knew personally, she wanted to know if they approved of me (they did) and now I feel like if I bring this up I'll hurt her. I don't want to do that, but I also don't want to be left wondering what it's like with other women (she de-virginized me) and I'd rather casually date now because I feel like we'll be sticking together for some time.
I'm not insanely into this girl but she's really awesome, so maybe that'll change and maybe it won't. Whether or not I should tell her that either I'm not sure, I figure I'll grow to like her more when we go on more dates.
Any advice? | I want to date casually, not sure how she'll take it. How to tell her in the least intrusive way possible? |
t3_kzw5q | Parenting | Found out I'm pregnant, in need of some advice/support. [x-post from r/mommit] | So here's my story...I'm 19, just finished beauty school in NYC, on the verge of getting a job at one of the best celebrity/high-end salons in the city/country. I'm dating the love of my life, who's 21 and in his last year of getting his BA in computer sci. We've been dating for about 4 years, have a great mature relationship and friendship and plan on spending the rest of our lives together. Both want kids, and he knows my passion in life has always been to be a mom.
I found out I was pregnant yesterday and immediately told both him and my mom. Mom is urging me to get an abortion, and my bf expected I'd do the same. I'd really like to keep it and I know that I'd be emotionally fit for raising a child. My bf disagrees and doesn't think he's ready. We'd be pretty ok financially as long as he got an okay job out of school and I saved for the next 9 months. I feel wrong getting an abortion (although I'm not against it in general.) I understand that if he's not on board, it's an issue, but it works the other way too. Not sure what to do and I guess I just need some support. | I'm 19 and pregnant with my 21 yr old bf of 4 years' baby. I want to keep it, but he doesn't really feel the same. |
t3_4psx71 | tifu | TIFU by wearing slippers | Today I was supposed to go to this meeting in a university, I wore a shirt with shorts and slippers because the meeting was with castmates for a play (also I was about an hour late). So naturally I thought it was cool to wear slippers. When I was at the gate the security guard was like "Sir no slippers, also no shorts." I was all like "Fuck." I have to go home and change. Luckily one of my friends had a bike and this is where my fuck up begins. I thought to myself "I can bike that far." My house was about 3 - 4 kilometers away so it was really short. Once I rode that bike, I knew there was no going back. Half way through the travel, there was no problems. But when I entered the urban parts, I felt this pain in my right thigh. I was panicking because I was in the middle of the street with on-going traffic. I stopped and checked my thigh, it was about 10 big ants in my thigh. I totally forgot about that breath freshening candy in my pocket that I was going to eat once I entered the University. I removed the ants and went my route. I was about a kilometer away from my house, when the ant bites started to itch. I ignored it, there began the numb feeling. Once I arrived home my leg went all numb. I put on my pants and shoes and went back. On the way back, the numbness turned into pain. A sharp and burning pain. I went to the meeting scratching the shit out of my thigh | The University where I was going for a meeting had a dress code, rode a bike, forgot candy in my pocket got bit a lot. |
t3_4qjjc8 | personalfinance | Need advice on best prepayment strategy for two mortgages | I have seen other posts that recommend to always pay down the higher interest rate mortgage no matter what. But it seems that in this case when I look at mortgage calculators, I would save more in interest to pay both down a bit rather than just the mortgage#2. I was hoping someone could help with the math to figure out the best prepayment strategy to minimize my total interest payments. The answer seems like it is somewhere in the middle.
Mortgage#1 = $291,197 principal remaining on fixed 3.375% 15yr loan originally $313,000 matures 03/2030
Mortgage#2 = $133,882 principal remaining on fixed 4% 30yr loan originally $170,000 matures 08/2042
Prepayments... We do an average of $1,333 per month ($500 extra per month plus a $10K lump prepayment at year end).
Right now, we just pay down the 4% Mortgage#2 but is that really the best solution? Are we better off paying some towards Mortgage#1 ?
Hopefully someone with better math skills will see this. Thanks reddit ! | What I learned is: |
t3_1h1glf | relationships | I [24M] have never felt this way about someone [26F] and am not sure what it means or what to do. | I've known this girl for a couple of years now and over time we've become really good friends. Over the past year I've developed feelings for her and just recently found out she felt the same way.
I got up the courage to tell her how I felt over the weekend, and it actually went pretty well. She was a little disappointed that I had heard through a mutual friend that she liked me, but she said she was glad to know. She said she had tried not liking me, but the feelings continued to come back.
We talked for quite a while and even shared a moonlit kiss. It was unbelievable. However she expressed some apprehension to start anything because we live in different cities, she wanted to figure out other things in her life (career, etc.) and was worried that I only started to like her because I knew she liked me. I tried to convince her that I had been feeling this way for a while (which I have), suggested that there would probably never be a perfect time, and we decided to take things very slowly.
We made very tentative plans to hang out on the weekend, and have been texting a little bit since then. The problem is I can't focus. I can't stop thinking about her, and am feeling nervous/excited all of the time but I really don't want to mess this up. I've heard people say they've experienced this, but I've never really felt this way about someone before. Also, I am afraid to push too hard when she has already expressed some apprehension.
I want to casually bring up the idea of hanging out again, but I don't want her to feel overcrowded or pushed. At the same time I want to make my intentions clear that I would really like this to work. Should I let her bring up the idea of hanging out this weekend or suggest something? | Girl I like says she likes me back. Now I can't stop thinking about her and want to suggest a hangout without crowding her! |
t3_3cg30d | relationships | Me [32 M] feeling lost | First off, I am currently seeing a therapist. However, I am also seeking some advice and opinions from the masses as well. Also, writing is therapeutic for me sometimes. So I might just ramble on and mouth-vomit a bit here. Hopefully this all has a point.
I keep getting into relationships that are destined to fail from the very beginning. My first last 6 years. My second lasted 1 year.
The biggest problem with both relationships was that I eventually wanted kids someday and they didn't.
I am also a pretty insecure person who seeks validation in other relationships. In general, I am attracted to very secure people. I think that makes sense and seems natural anyway. Everyone is attracted to strong, confident and secure people.
Anyway, I was mostly in control of my first relationship. I had no control over my second. I was always chasing her, and telling myself that it was worth it, so I wouldn't have to be alone or go back out there and start dating. To me, it always felt like she was extremely cold hearted. My good friends told me she was being emotionally abusive.
Now, I feel like I don't know what I want anymore. It's really a first world problem. I have everything else going for me. Job, money, family, in decent shape, a few good friends, etc...
My dream since ending college had been to move to Chicago, find a partner, and do everything that I ever wanted to do in life, and then finally settle down. After 8 years of dreaming, last year, I finally took steps to make that dream come true. I moved here and found someone who became very important to me. All in all it was a pretty unhealthy relationship. And it did not end well.
I just feel... lost... Don't know where to go from here. Don't know the type of person that I want. Don't know the type of person that I want to be. Don't know what I want out of life. Don't know anything anymore. Don't want to waste anymore time either.
What have others done who have felt this way? | Second serious relationship failed. Feeling lost. Don't know what I want out of life or out of my next relationship. What is the best advice when faced with this situation? |
t3_3dbfvh | relationships | My boyfriend [27M] said I [25/f]was a cheap, bad parent for wanting to save a toy for my future kids. I am hurt. | Something really threw me off today and it's making me uncomfortable and upset.
So, today I joked (even if I was serious) that I should save the RC Helicopter I won for my future kids. My boyfriend said that I was so cheap and he looked at me like I was crazy. He even said I was crazy and cheap and a bad parent.
Just because I won a gift and didn't pay for it, I can't give it to my kids. Heck, an RC Helicopter is better than idk, nothing! I didn't say I would starve my kids or I would never gift them any more toys. My boyfriende reacted sooo strangely and it's really upset me. It's like he doesn't trust I can be a good parent. This is the second time after I said something about raising my future kids, that he would get upset about (the first time about spoiling them with piano lessons and stemt toys if they wanted!). I am getting really meek and depressed about my future with him.
I told him I was "joking" about the gifting and he's like you sounded serious!!! I was really shocked he took it so personally. Was I wrong?
What should I do?
We've been dating for over three years. | My boyfriend [27M] said I [25/f]was a cheap, bad parent for wanting to save an RC Helicopter (that I won) for my future kids. I am hurt. |
t3_18uo6j | BreakUps | I (22/M) sent a letter to my ex of one week (F/21) and regret it. Should I break NC to say so? | *title - We dated for just under 2 years, but she has been my ex for one week.
Pretty much as the title says, but I'm pretty sure she has no concrete concept of NC and has contacted me twice since she broke up with me. One time was when she received the last letter I sent her and now I'm worried she'll think I'm going to send her one every week still. She ended things because I'm in another country, but I came here and realized NC was the only way to kill the pain.
The letter pretty much wishes her well and says not to be afraid of the future (Only three lines). I wish I hadn't sent it. Should I say something or just leave it be. Should I explain the concept of no contact to her? | sent a letter I shouldn't have, am considering breaking NC to tell her I regret it |
t3_3e35kn | relationships | [20m] my gf [19f] broke up for the summer | So I meet this girl last September, started as FWB for a few months but eventually we fell in love with each other.
It got pretty serious, I met all of her siblings and her mother and we spent like half of our nights together. (Her two younger brothers love me)
It was great until she moved back home for the summer. Working 50 hours a week and like 20 at least on weekends (she's a waitress). We are only 45 minutes away from each other but her work schedule and mine (I work 9-5 weekdays) made it very difficult to see each other.
She was having a difficult time with the situation and was having doubts, so we both agreed that time apart would be for the best. We also agreed to get together when the school year started to see where we are at that point.
I know it wasn't perfect and I absolutely felt like it was best to break things off for now, however I want nothing more than to have her back on my life in the fall.
Currently going NC right now, but I think about her everyday.
Anyone go through anything similar? Advice on reestablishing contact after period of NC? Advice on approaching her in the fall? | summer breakup looking to get back together with her in the fall during the school year |
t3_p12l3 | dating_advice | I'm interested in a girl who is good friends with a girl who likes me. | I'm 17 year old dude who used to have a thing with this one girl (Let's call her Susie). We made out once, and I know she really likes me. The thing is though, I am not really into her. She is very nice and all and I want to continue to be friends with her, but one of her close friends has gotten my attention (Lets call her Mary). Mary is very pretty and super nice, but she thinks that me and Susie still have a thing. (I was with Mary and Susie, and Mary would try to get me and Susie alone together). How do I make it clear that I am interested in Mary without seeming like a total douchebag? Would it be weird since they are very close friends? Please Help! | This girl who is into me has a friend who I like a lot more than the girl who likes me. But the girl who I am into thinks I am into her friend. |
t3_30qmi8 | relationships | I [21F] have a massive crush on my TA [late-twenties M] | I'm sorry if this is in the wrong place but I have no idea where else to post this. Okay, so I don't want to be too specific with this since I know he's a redditor, but I've developed a huge crush on one of my TAs. I saw him on the first day of class and I thought he was incredibly handsome. Then I go to the first recitation of the year and he turns out to be my TA. Great.
He's shy, super smart, and a little awkward and I find it totally endearing. I know he lives near me too because I always see him at the shops or at the bus stop. We have briefly talked about things unrelated to school and it seems like we click really well, but I often get super nervous anytime he acknowledges me and run away. I'm normally very composed, even around guys I'm interested in, but around him I have the speaking skills of a toddler and my stomach is in knots. I feel like a giddy schoolgirl and it's embarrassing.
Obviously I know I can't do anything while he is my TA, but I guess I'm just wondering if I should pursue something after the semester is over? I'm just scared of making a fool out of myself and I have no idea how to approach this situation. Also he is a fair bit older than me and is a PhD candidate so I don't know if it's weird for this little undergrad girl to approach him. | Crushing on my super cute older TA, do I try to make a move after the semester is over and grades or in or not? |
t3_3ft15f | relationships | My [20M] ex [20F] is going to my girlfriend's party [20F], however we ended on bad terms and i'm considering not going. | Hello everyone
So I've been going out with my girlfriend for a while now and it's her 21st coming up. A fantastic time, except I found out that my Ex is coming. No big deal right? Well not really, we ended on bad terms. To the point where I went no contact and ignored everything she sent to me, she knew I was ignoring her and thankfully it all stopped. We haven't seen or spoken to each other for 3 years and I was happy to never see her again. Until I found out she'd be at my GF's party because they're good friends. I am not ready to see her and am seriously considering not going to the party. But i'm obligated because we're going out...help! | ex is going to my girlfriend's party, we ended on bad terms and I don't want to go. |
t3_4ipt5d | relationships | I [24/F] think my best friend [25/M] has a crush/thing for me | Okay so basically I live in an apartment with my best friend and a few other people who work around the city and it works out well. He's a decent guy and we've known each other for years - I know him from college and he had an 2/3 year on/off relationship with my other best friend.
Anyhow, recently he is behaving differently. He's always spending time with me and always wants to do things with me, and he's started a bit of flirty banter and teasing which I tend to brush off.
Some of his friends from another group came out to a bar with us the other night and we were all chatting in our separate groups and one of his friends pulled me aside and started asking questions, such as did I find my friend attractive, would I date him if I was single, what did I think of him etc etc.
I REALLY do not see him like that. I had a crush on him years ago when I had gone through a bad break up but overall I don't see him in that way - was his friend's questioning something to be aware of? I'm not really sure what to do because I feel a bit uneasy but I don't want to bring it up and embarrass us both and make it awkward! | I think my roommate/best friend has a crush on me, I don't fancy him back and it's making me uncomfortable, oh and I'm taken. |
t3_3glx1w | relationships | My [19/F] best friend [18/F] cut me where it hurt during an argument. I don't know if I can accept her friendship now she's apologised. | Two years ago I met this girl in high school. We got on fairly well but had a stupid argument that led to us ghosting each other for 4 months. She randomly apologised last summer via facebook.
She never usually apologises because her mum raised her to be overconfident to the point of arrogance and she always thinks she's right. I never usually "take people back" because my father abandoned me when I was a kid and I promised myself not give people who purposely walked out of my life a second chance. But somehow, we made up and became SUPER close.
However, recently she's been acting off with me. I assumed it was because she's just got a new guy and she wanted to spend time with him so wasn't worried. But apparently she had a problem, because we ended up in a conversation where she told me I was too clingy and not fun to spend time with so she didn't want to know me anymore. We haven't spoken since.
Today, she sent me an apology for "being a dick" with no other explanations and I don't know whether to forgive her. We've had plenty of arguments but this really hurt. I've already gone against my rules for her once. I got the best friendship of my life out of it, but I also got a miniature repeat of the worst event of my life (someone who's important to me saying I'm not worth having around).
I feel weak for even asking this question, like I'd be degrading myself by letting her treat me badly then swan back into my life. It goes totally against my principles. But not making up with her means losing my closest friend completely and totally. The last month has been so boring without her. I know that I don't need her friendship but I want it because it enhances my life. I have other friends but none that can truly replace her.
These two parts of me are so conflicted. What should I do? | I don't know whether to stick to my principles and cut my best friend out of my life for good. Or give in and make up with her with the risk she'll ditch me again. |
t3_1ge5vw | relationships | I [19M] am the reason why my relationship with my GF [18F] of 11 months is failing and today she said me she was seeing guys behind my back. | Hi guys!
First of all, I'm german and my grammar and wording might not be the best, but i try to make it as understandable as possbile!
Like the title says, I'm the reason why our relationship is failing. We love each other like crazy, but we both have major trust issues and it's killing us since the beginning but somehow me made it work for so long.
She is this type of girl who says she can't get along with girls and has a lot of male friends and only one girl friend. I'm super jealous and I don't want to let her see other guys (That's why I'm the reason). I have no problem her seeing her one girl friend, but they both have the same friends and she met them with her.
I know that my girlfriend would never cheat on me, but today see said me that she was seeing some male friends behind my back for the last 1.5 months. And this is really killing me. I know that nothing happened but she lied to me like that in September 2012 when she met her ex-boyfriend behind my back and didn't plan to tell me, but he posted on her facebook wall so I confronted her. Since then she didn't met any other male friends as far as I know.
It probalby sounds crazy that I'm the one that wants to break up and that she didn't do it a long time ago, but she really loves me, but also lies to me and it's such a huge red flag for me.
I will see her later today and don't know what to do, I want to be with her, but our relationship is everything else than healthy and it's going rapidly downhill in the last few months.
I would think it's the best for both of us to move on and for me to get my shit together or else I will never be happy with a girl.
thanks for your time, i hope somebody could give me some advice. | I'm super jealous of my girlfriend and don't want her to see other guys. She met some guys behind my back for the last 1.5 months and told me today. I have no idea how to fix this. |
t3_1dni0h | relationships | I (24M) am having problems dealing with my GF's (25F) body image issues. | To keep things short, I am a competitive athlete and as such I'm usually in pretty good shape. That being said, I haven't had success dating women related to sports or fitness, so my gf is a polar opposite. But all of my long-term relationships dating back 5 years or so have always led to body image issues, some of which had contributed to ending the relationship. My current relationship is great in many ways, but my GF has pretty poor body image and self-esteem; Understandably, I don't expect anyone to be perfectly happy with their body...I'm definitely not.
Basically I feel like I am in a situation where I can't win. My girlfriend (and those past) vocalizes her envy of me and what I look like even though I am adamant about my support of her body; I compliment her and tell her how attractive i think she is as often as possible. I think of myself as being supportive of her weight-loss goals, but I am also very careful to not be overbearing, guilt her, or do anything to upset her when it comes to diet or exercise. When she asks for help, I help; when she doesn't, I don't or help very passively.
Several situations have occurred where I ask completely innocent questions about her day or what she's doing and she thinks I'm backhandedly insulting her. I hate being in this situation where I can't win.
Can someone provide me with some insight or advice into how I can deal with situation and avoid repeating my past? | GF is insecure about body image/weight. Accuses me of submissively insulting her or finding her unattractive. |
t3_17slnm | relationships | My (19m) gf (18f) feels like she's betraying me when she hangs out with non-mutual friends. What should I say to her to help her not feel this way? | My girlfriend (18f) and I (19m) go to different colleges and we have been dating for 3.5 years. Recently, she has been hanging out with a new group of friends, which is natural because we go to different colleges. She told me that every time she hangs out with these friends, she feels like she is betraying me because she is having fun without me (for the first time). We had the same friends throughout high school and now we are at different colleges and naturally have developed different groups of friends.
She says she is scared of growing out of me and says that she thinks that is the reason that she feels as though she is betraying me when hanging out with these new friends.
She is receiving pressure to have "the college experience" from her sister who is 6 years older. This is straining our relationship because she doesn't know what to do. She values her sister's opinion, but she also values this relationship. This makes her feel conflicted.
We do not want to break up and we want to find a way to work through this. We are about 2 hours away from each other and see each other at most every 4 weeks. What should I tell her so she doesn't feel like she is betraying me? | My girlfriend feels like she is betraying me whenever she hangs out with her new friends at college. What should I say? |
t3_1e7sxr | relationships | I (M20) feel very unappreciated by my SO (F19) | My SO and I have been together roughly 2 months. Though we were "dating" and seeing each other for a few months before. In this time I have given her countless gifts and have helped her through her previous bad relationship. I buy her a bouquet of white roses every Monday, drop anything and everything when she wants to spend time together, and just recently bought her a $400 ring (out of my budget) to let her know that I plan to treat her with respect and that I will be there for her.
She has what I like to call, only child syndrome. At times she can be a diva. She's extremely bad at communicating and likes for everything to be about her or go her way. She can be dangerously selfish and doesn't understand at times that the world doesn't revolve around her. She's the type that tells you all about her life because "you should be interested".
So when I give her these thing or show acts of unselfishness and loyalty I get the usual than you and a kiss or something. That's cool, and I'm not complaining about that. But when I want something like say, sex, or just have her go out and do something with me. She always has a reason not to or suggests we do something she would rather do. I don't know how to deal with this because talking to her about it is NOT an option, and that's the only way I know how to deal with problems. | I give my SO endless gifts and random acts of selflessness, and never get the little things I want in return. |
t3_3hxgqj | relationships | Me [21/F] with my boyfriend [22/M] together 9 months, he casually mentions a girl he helped cheat on her boyfriend. | Alex and I have been together for about 9 months. It's the best relationship I've ever had. I love him. We met because I was a regular where he worked. He used to have a coworker named Nicole that was always a total bitch to me for reasons unknown. Well until now, I guess.
This literally happened 15 minutes ago. Alex and I are out for drinks and he suddenly started acting really weird. I kind of gave him a look and he said, "wow. This is awkward. Do you remember Nicole that I used work with? Well she cheated on her boyfriend with me and she's sitting right over there with her boyfriend."
It felt like I got punched in the stomach. I don't know why it hurt me as much as it did, but I just said, "wow I really didn't want to know that." And he stared saying stuff like, "I didn't think it'd be a big deal if I told you." I just said I'll be right back and have been in the restroom crying ever since. I don't know what to do. This really hurts because I've been cheated on before and he's always said how much he's against cheating and is all about loyalty. I just need someone to tell me if I'm over reacting or not. Help. | Out for drinks with bf. He points out a girl that was always a bitch to me and casually mentions she cheated on her boyfriend with him. Now I'm in the restroom crying. |
t3_3e7kr4 | relationships | I [21 M] have been with her [20 F] for six months and she keeps saying I don't do enough to show I care. | Hello /r/relationships.
I've been seeing this girl for about six months (we'll call her Betty). Last time we hung out, I cut off our date early because I had made plans with a friend who has rarely in town. On my end, I forgot to tell her that this was happening because the plans sprung up on me and I didn't want to disappoint her by canceling on her and making feel like she wasn't a priority. Betty got a little bit upset about it and thought that this meant I didn't care about her and that I didn't care about her as much as she did me. It was a mistake on my part, and I apologized. Bettty seemed to accept it, but wanted me to show that I cared about her more.
Flash forward to yesterday, we were texting. She flipped on me yesterday, saying that not asking her to hang out was a sign that I didn't care. I told her that I'm not the only person who should be initiating wanting to hang out, and that if she wanted to, she had more than enough liberty to ask.
Right now, it seems to me that we are on pretty rough terms and we are suppose to go to a baseball game on Sunday. I know I want to take her, but I think we are just going to be on edge the entire time. I hate that she doesn't think I'm giving enough, but I'm honestly expecting her to put forth some effort too. Is that unreasonable? | The girl I'm dating doesn't think I'm putting forth enough effort, but has put in a lot of visible effort on her end too. |
t3_1kzglu | relationships | Is it Sweet or Creepy for me [16M] to Bike 10 miles to ask out my crush [16F] at a park near her house? | Okay, I know how it sounds but let me first explain that I normally bike 22 miles every weekend so biking 10 miles is not a big deal. Okay so I have been meaning to ask out this girl and I was going to do it today after school but I didn't have the guts to get it over with. Now I'm obviously regretting not doing it today and I am so anxious to ask this girl out, would it be weird if I just texted her "hey go outside to the park" and met her there to ask her out?
She lives right next to the park and it's not a big deal for her to meet me there, I just want to make sure I'm not crossing any lines by showing up at a park near her house. I can always say "I was on my usual bike ride and I couldn't wait any longer so I stopped by" as my excuse as to why I'm in the area. Also, I've been to her apartment building before so it's not like I randomly showed up or anything. So just please give me your honest opinion as to whether I should bike down there and catch her off guard and do it. I was thinking she might think it was really sweet for me to have biked that far to ask her out, but I also think she might get disgusted and weirded out by the fact I showed up uninvited. I don't want to have any doubt, so let me know! | I normally bike 22miles a week so 10 miles isn't a big deal but is it weird or not for me to show up at her park uninvited and ask her out |
t3_43wm0v | relationships | [18 M] Am I overreacting or being immature? | My girlfriend and I are currently in a long distance relationship because we're both in different colleges. We skype a lot, practically everyday. However, there are times when she talks to her friends on camera, she abruptly mutes the call with no explanation. I've muted the call sometimes but the times I have were because the environment around me was too loud to actually be speaking. With her, we could just be talking, and then if a friend comes in or says something to her, she'll just start talking to them and mid-conversation with friend, mute the call and forget about me for the next 10 minutes.
I don't wanna jump to the first case scenario and think, "Oh, she's hiding something from me." But am I reasonable in being agitated by this? It makes me feel so uncomfortable that my entire mood is pretty much killed after that. And on top of that, when she notices that my mood is down, she says that I'm being a downer.
Sometimes, she doesn't mute the call, but just doesn't talk to me, but instead types everything out. Because she has me on headphones and then talks to her friend. And while being full aware we're not actually talking much, she apologizes and says she didn't even want to talk to the friend in the first place. I don't even know how to bring this upto her because she's the extremely defensive and non-confrontational type wrapped into one. | Girlfriend and I skype a lot. When friends come into the equation, she suddenly mutes skype call for however long she wants to talk to the friend, even though sometimes, she claims to have not wanted to talk to friend anyways. Am I unreasonable in feeling agitated over this? |
t3_3wr1iv | tifu | TIFU By Walking Back Home From Best Buy | TIFU by walking home from best buy.
Im a pretty big gamer, and when Black Ops 3 and Rainbow 6 Siege launched for the Xbox One, I just had to get it. So I saved up just enough money for both games over the course of 2-3 months before they launched, since Im on a really tight budget I dont have much money left at the end of each month, and went out to Best Buy on foot. I got there in about 20 minutes from my home, picked up both games for the Xbox One, and headed back home. On the way back, I noticed 2 people following me. 2 teens actually. So I walked faster, and so did they (they probably seen my Best Buy bag). Then they started sprinting towards me, and thats when I knew they wanted my Best Buy bag and whatever was in it. I ran as fast as I could, but then of course I had to slip. So they caught up, beat the living hell out of me, and then took my 2 games and ran. I was in a lot of pain so I couldnt chase after them. A couple people just walked by me, pretending I wasnt even there. So I sucked the pain up and walked back home. After saving up for so long, I end up losing over $170 in a few minutes.
Lesson learned: NEVER WALK HOME WITH A BEST BUY BAG IN YOUR HAND! Well, theres my FU of the day, time to save up for about 2 months so i can purchase the games again, I was really looking forward to playing them over the Christmas Break from work too. | Bought Black ops 3 and Rainbow Six Siege, got jumped, lost both games. |
t3_2dd4rt | relationships | Me [39 M] with my wife [36F] of 3 years, she was in bed talking to a male friend from work from 10:00pm to 11:30pm | A couple nights ago she was on the phone in our bedroom from about 10:00pm to 11:30pm (until I went in). I was in the room next to the bedroom with the door open so it wasn't in secret or anything, I could hear her laughing and talking the whole time. When I went in at 11:30 she held up 2 fingers (to tell me two minutes) and then ended the call. When I asked who it was, she said it's 'Brett', a friend from the office. I just can't imagine spending over an hour on the phone late at night with a random female friend from work. I just wouldn't do it. We haven't been doing too well recently so I know that my sensitivity is a little off - is it reasonable for this to upset me? | wife spent over an hour late at night on the phone laughing with some random guy from her office, i'm not sure if i'm justified in being bothered by it. |
t3_2fxsc8 | personalfinance | Can I dispute receiving a paperless statement receipt? | Hubby got a letter from CC company stating that payment is overdue and the card is set to be closed. WTF...we haven't used this card in months!
He goes online, finds that in June an anti-virus software renewal charge. No CC statement received in those 2 months, no calls, nothing. He pays the balance off (charge plus 2 late fees) immediately and checks his credit score - missed payment reported AND 50 point drop in credit score! :-O
I call the company and state my case. They claim that he was enrolled in online statements and it can't disputed unless it was a paper statement that the USPS didn't deliver. He checks his email - trash folder, spam: no notifications from company at all! He doesn't even recall signing up for online statements.
It's there anything that can be done? All that's wanted is the missed payment taken off so the credit score doesn't suffer... | Hubby got a 50 pt drop in credit score on rarely used card after not receiving online statements, causing overdue balance. |
t3_2bwldx | jobs | Don't want to be a 30 year old waiter, halp. | Entering a quarter-life crisis, I suppose. I'm a 25 year old college dropout with little prospects for what I want to do with my future.
I have great social skills, I'm very likeable, I interview like a champ, and I'm not a complete moron - give me a task that doesn't involve really complex math, and I'm pretty capable. I'm a veritable "Jack of all trades, master of none," and I don't know how to translate that into the job market.
I went to school for theater (I know) and a teacher certification as a fallback, but once I started student-teaching, I realized that education was not for me. That said, I am a performer at heart. I know what people want to hear, and I can deliver. I figure this translates into sales, but I don't know anything about cars.
I'd like some form of fulfillment with my work, but that said, anything is better than waiting tables for the rest of ny life, which seems to be the way things are headed. The most fulfillment I've had in a job was selling electronic cigarettes at a kiosk in the mall: I was making a spectacle with my pitches, making a decent commission, all while getting people off of cigarettes. Something in a similar vein would be preferable, but I'd also like something a bit more lucrative... any thoughts? | college dropout actor doesn't want to wait tables forever. Can do anything, or at least act like it until he gets in the swing of things. Needs career counseling. |
t3_1kqq8o | self | Instead of listing companies we hate, why not change it up and share some positive stories? | I realize there are negative stories for every company, but there are also positive ones, too.
For example: Alltel, US Bank, and Apple have all helped me to the point the story sticks in my head.
Alltel: Back when they were (a lot) larger and before smart phones evolved into whay they are today, I had a water damaged moto flip phone. It worked fine and all, but the software was out of date. So I bring it in and Alltel updates the software. The next day the phone kept shutting off and doing odd things. I brought the phone back in and explained I couldn't prove anything but that this phone worked properly the day before. I even brought a much older phone to activate because I didn't want to buy a new one. The sales rep went into the back room and came out with two brand new phones and asked me to choose one. He told me he would rather see a polite customer (this was around Christmas time) leave happy than Alltel make a few bucks.
US Bank: I sent a check via their online Bill Pay system. Accidentally selected the wrong account for the check to pull from, but never realized this. I get a call a few days later from my banker telling me that he allowed the check to clear (over draft was turned off), he refunded the over draft fee, and that I had a negative balance. This isn't something I expected from a bank, but it made my day and saved me a ton of money.
Apple: Some board in my iPhone 4S slowly started dying one day. The wifi would only work sometimes and the genius rep told me it would stop working all together soon. He offered the $200 replacement - I said no and left. Thanks to reddit, I knew to call "Customer Retention". Since the phone was only 39 days out of warranty, the rep said I could go into any Apple store and get a free replacement! They have also replaced the battery one my MBP before even though it isn't covered under the extended warranty. | All three companies have helped me and I respect that. It may just have been the reps I was paired with, but these are feel-good stories to share. |
t3_31yqu3 | relationships | I [23F] met an amazing new guy [27M] only 9 days ago, and now we're already long distance. | Bear with me - this may sound like a crazy story. But it's totally legitimate and wonderful.
I just met this amazing guy, literally last week. We've known each other for a total of 9 days.
We went rock climbing on our first date, then out for drinks and dinner that night and decided spontaneously to go to Las Vegas the next day. And it totally happened - we took an amazing road trip to Vegas with each other (basically still total strangers) and had an absolute blast for 2 days before road tripping back home.
We spent the rest of the night together, then were together constantly since the day we met. Spent the night together every night, spent all day together everyday. We had an amazing time.
The thing is, he's in the army, and based in a different state and was just here on leave. I'm 2000 miles away in a different state from him. We decided last night to make this a "real deal" relationship, we want to try this! We both mutually agree that we like each other enough to really try to keep this going. So we're already planning a visit for me to his state soon.
He plans on moving here soon, hopefully by the end of the year. So if things really work out, we aren't permanently apart.
What are some ideas you have to keep this fire burning for us in the meantime? Has anyone else been in a situation like ours? What can we do to prevent this from fading before seeing each other again?
Thank you r/relationships :) You've only ever helped me before, I trust you! | Met a seemingly perfect guy only 9 days ago, went to Vegas for our second date, fell for each other big time in a super short time but he was only here on vacation. Long distance already. |
t3_stg3s | needadvice | Would you continue to do your job if you were starving? | I have been seeing a counsellor for several months. My employer will not pay for a psychiatrist or a psychologist. I am at a point that I feel I am no longer productive in my current job, and if I continue to work, I would be unintentionally counter productive for our clients, my co-workers, and my managers.
My counsellor asked if I would do my job to keep from starving. I now realize the question is really no different from "Would you do your job if there was a whip to your back or if your employer was threatening your life or the life of a loved one?" This hypothetical changes me from employee to slave.
At the time I interpreted it more as a question about whether I felt I could still do my job. My response was yes but I could not align my response with my feelings about work. My answer is still yes, but my justification is different. The rest of our session was more about making sure I continue working rather then trying to sort though my anxiety. How would you answer the question and what do you think I should tell my counsellor the next time I see her? | The real question from my counsellor here is "Would you do your job if you were a slave?" My answer is yes, but I misinterpreted the question. How would you respond? |
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