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t3_fkv7x | AskReddit | How should I have responded to this jerk at a hockey game tonight? How about future jerks? | I went to an NHL game tonight. The people in front of me stood up during exciting plays and almost-goals. It seems like people do this a lot at games. I did it too, but only to see the ice the people in front of me were blocking when they stood.
During the 3rd period a guy 3 rows behind me kept yelling for me to sit down because he couldn't see through me. I didn't notice at first but my friend did and he got into a shouting match with him and it ended at that.
I don't think I stood up too much, but if I did I would have stopped had he just asked me to. He didn't need to be a dick. Was my friend in the right to respond like he did? Should I have said something or just ignored him?
I'm not a big guy so it's not like I could intimidate him or fight him without losing. How do you deal with bullies like this in life? | Bully at a hockey game had a problem with me impeding his view. My friend fought with him verbally. How do I deal with bullying in the future? |
t3_2xfl28 | tifu | TIFU by texting my new boyfriend while on pain meds | So a couple of nights ago I found out that I have kidney stones as well as an infection. When the pain started, I was at a friend's house with my new boyfriend, let's call him Henry. So I start feeling shitty and voice the fact that my stomach is hurting a bit. Next thing I know, I'm throwing up and feeling intense pain. So Henry and my friend drive me to the ER, my friend leaves, Henry stays with me. He's being really supportive and calls my parents for me, as we are both in college and don't quite know how to completely adult on our own yet.
Flash forward to today. I'm still feeling like shit, only now I'm taking upwards of 6 pills a day to help me pass this. Henry has been with me the past couple days, so I give him the okay to go out and party with some friends. I'm feeling a little loopy and can feel myself being much less aware than usual, probably due to the pain meds they have me on. I, trying to be the cool, easygoing girlfriend, send him a text that was meant to say "Take a shot for me! ;)" Well, this didn't go as planned, so now Henry has a text waiting for him that says "take a shit for me ;)", and my phone died immediately after sending it. OF COURSE, my phone charger is at his apartment. | my new boyfriend probably thinks I'm a sick, sexually deviant fuck. |
t3_3r6jwa | relationships | Me [20 M] had a date since one year with[21F] and i'm totaly confused | First of all, sorry english is not my first language.
I broke up with my Ex a year ago, since then i just had one nighstands and last friday i had my first "real" date. I know her from my ex ,and she is still a good friend with my ex.My ex and i come along with eachother. Well to the Date i just will go fast forward and will ask the questions that are bothering me. First of all i realy like this girl and i think she likes me too. In the date she teased me to "take a risk" and i did and try to kiss her , she rejected me but she also said that it didn't has to mean what i think. Yeah and thats how it keep going we had a good time. In the end when i was going to take her home she kept teasing me that i shouldnt always think the worst and that a no doesnt mean always no. She said she would realy like to see me again. On the Next day we were texting and she said that she had no time for 3 weeks. Well my question is what should i do?.. And sorry for my terrible english i hope you can understand my problem :) ! | Had a date since a year , tried to kiss her she rejected me but said i shouldn't think the worst and she want to see me again. |
t3_3gbe9m | relationships | Me [24 M] with my gf[26 F] I didn't get her father's approval because of his impossible standards, so she broke up with me. | I've been dating this girl for only a month, but we've been friends for about a year. I really like. She really likes me. I've date a few women before, but no one like her. I can literally be myself in every aspect and she loves all of it. I come from a broken family that's in poverty. She comes from a upper class wealthy family. I have commuity college education and work as a heads salesman at a popular retail chain in Western Canada. She has university level education and she still has years of school ahead of her. She also works at a 5 star resort.
I finally got to meet her dad. I couldn't earlier because he's always away on business trips. Met her mom. She loves me. I needed her father's approval to date her. Just the way her family runs I suppose. I'm a very likable guy so I thought no problem. I was wrong. He didn't like me. Not because of my personality, but because I didn't have a career and enough wealth to support his daughter and a family. I also wasn't athletic and fit enough. All of the men in that family were huge and muscular. I'm 5'10" and have a thin build. Pretty average. Since I didn't get his approval she broke up with me. It's super obvious she didn't want to, but her father was forcing her too.
I told her that she's an adult and can make her own life decisions, but I couldn't get through to her. Do you guys (and gals) have any advice on how I can her to ignor her dad's disapproval or to win her dad's approval. I'm so lost. I feel like she was ripped away from me with no warning or foreshadowing. I know this sounds like a plot to a romance movie or whatever, but it true and I feel like a complete mess. | My love life is like a cliche romance movie without a happy ending. Need advice. |
t3_1y9hd3 | relationships | Me [20 M] no contact with ex [20F] for two months now, no progress | I had been dating for almost 3 years. My ex broke up with me two months ago and I now see its fine without her. I blocked off anyway possible so that we could not see each other until I get better and try to be friends because she is a good person and was a big part of my life with finding my religion and helping me be a confident person.
I dream about her almost every single night, I wake up hurting and depressed. I have been occupying my time with friends and going out and going to classes and volunteering. She doesn't go to my college so I don't have to worry about seeing her. After every friend gathering I go to, I have fun and towards the end I think about her, then I get upset and be silent the rest of the night. I have been putting a fake smile for two months now and I don't know how to make it real.
I know I don't want to be with her, I want to devote all the time for me. I can't be happy even though I know I don't need her
I don't know how to make myself feel better. | Still heartbroken after two months, been active with no contact, still unhappy. |
t3_3y6vxq | relationships | I've [22F] caught the feels for a close friend [22F] - we're both straight, or I thought I was. | I'm struggling not only with the fact that I don't think I'm totally straight, but with a bad case of probably-unrequited feelings. I've known this girl for almost two years and she's one of the best friends I've ever had. I started having feelings for her a few months after we met and I've kept it to myself out of fear of ruining the friendship and also because for all intents and purposes, I'm straight.
Sometimes I think she might feel the same but I'm always second guessing that it's just me being hopeful. But at this point I'm just frustrated that it's consuming me and I want to move on with my life. I want to tell her because I feel dishonest if I don't, and maybe getting shot down will help, but that's also terrifying. If she doesn't reciprocate my feelings, I don't think she's the type of person to cut me out of her life, but it'll still make things awkward.
Do you have any advice/stories of your own experience with falling for a friend (same sex or otherwise) to help me out? | Questioning my sexuality because of developing feelings for a close friend, really wanting to get closure by telling her, but not sure what to do. |
t3_3629gf | Advice | Internship coming to an end, what steps should I take if I do want a full time position? | So, my internship is coming to an end in about a month. I just graduated today with a degree in Communication Technology.
I really would love to work here at the company i'm interning for. The company actually just went through a "cleansing" 4 employees have been let go. Long story, basically a betrayal. There are now 2 positions available that go along the lines of my internship. Should I wait for them to say something about it, or should I bring it up?
My question is, what do I tell the CEO that i'm interested? How do I starting this conversation? Should I mention anything now or wait till it's closer to the end of my internship? Also, I do feel like my co-workers like me and want me to stay. It feels like a good fit. It's not just hopeful thinking.
Before I came here I was working in IT. So since i've been interning here, i've made a lot of upgrades changes to co-workers PCs/Laptops and they were very appreciative. Also helped a lot with troubleshooting issues with other things.... i.e. printer, wifi, network, pc issues. This is not my main responsibility as an intern, but definitely helps. So I know co-workers are appreciative of me.
How do I bring up the subject of transitioning into full time with my CEO? or should I talk to my supervisor before bring it up with the CEO? | internship coming to an end, wondering what steps to take on talking with the CEO on a fulltime position? |
t3_3lr06d | relationships | Me [26F] feeling sick of my BF [27M] of 5 years constantly being overwhelmed by stress | This might make me [26F] a bad girlfriend but I have about had it with my boyfriends [27M] seeming inability to handle stress And his general negativity. Sometimes the smallest thing like having to do laundry or go to the grocery store sets him into a state of stress where he can't do anything. He can't go to the grocery store because he starts complaining about five minutes in about how much he hates it and wants to leave, leading to him rushing me or just being in a bad mood. I go to the store alone now because I want to be able to shop in peace and not have to run crisis intervention.
At first I was understanding and have done multiple things to help him try and deal with the stress - from a white board to organize what he has to do, to being his emotional support, even to suggesting therapy (which he says he is too busy and stressed to go to). He does have a demanding job but most days he either works from home or is out early enough to have time for adult responsibilities.
I do love him but the constant hand wringing and proclamations about how he's overwhelmed by stress are really starting to ruin our relationship. His constant complaining is really a turn off. He's also very negative about almost everything that happens to him. I don't want to tell him to bottle up his emotions, but I also want an emotionally strong partner who is capable and able to handle himself and his life. | My BF of five years is constantly complaining that he's overwhelmed by stress and it's starting to drive me up a wall. I love him but this aspect of his personality is making me question our relationship. Don't know what else I can do. |
t3_132lvn | relationships | My GF [26F] is pressuring me [27M] to get married and I'm freaking out | Me: 27 male
Her: 26 female
Relationship Length: 2.75 years
Living Together: 1.75 years
My girlfriend gave me an ultimatum to decide to marry her by the end of the year. I'm mainly worried about marrying her because of her poor work ethic and personal finances (Especially with having kids, I need someone who will be a hard worker, and I just don't see that with my girlfriend). These are two things I know will be impossible to change in a person, but I also acknowledge these are two of the most common problems between two people in a marriage. We've had conversations about this, and I feel that she is aware of my expectations, but I am doubtful she will change to meet them given our history. Am I being too picky to expect a woman to be a hard worker and have good personal finances or should I really examine what I want and find someone else? | GF gave me an ultimatum to decide to marry her by the end of the year, but I'm concerned because of her poor work ethic and personal finances. What should I do? |
t3_4y63ci | relationships | Me [20's M] found the one [30's F]. What do I do? | To keep this short, I met someone over a year ago through work. Before anyone says the 'don't shit where you eat' comment, we work for the same company but we never see each other during work time.
However, I do see her before work starts, during breaks, during lunches and sometimes after work, as well as work nights out.
When I do see her I involuntarily clam up and I start breathing fast. I have started monitoring my heart rate and it is over 170 when I have just finished talking to her. It is normally much lower than that.
We get on amazingly well, have seen films together, always chat at the works night out and we have a lot in common. I had put her as a really good friend in my head but recently I have been developing strong feelings towards her. Now, I get really 'butterflies in the stomach' around her and I can't stop but look at her when I can because she is the most amazing looking girl I've ever seen.
I have never had feelings as strong as this for anyone.
Now, the reason I have posted here at last, what do I do? There is a slight age gap between us and I am so scared to ask her out on an actual date because of the fear of rejection. As well as that, I don't want to get the wrong idea but we have spoke a few times about relationships we have had and she has even said that together we have to find a boyfriend for her and a girlfriend for me. I am wondering if I should act on my feelings at all.
I have even started having dreams about her which really doesn't help because it's dreams like me asking her out and her saying yes or things like the two of us being married already and having a house. Those kinds of dreams make me really sad when I wake because they're the dreams where they feel so real, can't remember the word to describe that.
Please help me reddit, what do I do? | I'm pretty sure I've met the one but I don't know what to do because I've never felt like this before. |
t3_33yo1f | relationships | Me [22 M] with my ___ [22 F] 1.5 years, I just found out she sells porn pictures and videos. | I am an IT student and I fix alot of computers. My gf's pc had problems (it happens more often) so I tried to fix it.
As I opened the browser, it asked me to open the last tabs that were open since the browser crashed at last use. I saw a tab open namen "My girl funds".
Of course I was curious, so I clicked it.
Soon I found out she has a profile and has been selling pics and vids of herself masturbating etc to random dudes and girls on the internet.
I have no idea what to do now. Do i ignore it? Do I say something about it? Should I be mad, sad, happy? | Found out my gf sells porn vids and pics, wat do? |
t3_3hzsge | tifu | Tifu by doing laundry | This happened about 10 minuets ago...
So I had to do a small load of laundry,mainly football stuff and underwear.I use the Gain Pods as detergent, similar to the kind you use for a dishwasher. So there is a bag of these pods sitting on top of the washing machine (or so I thought).I grab the bag and reach into it thinking I'm going to be welcomed by the soft texture of the water soluble layer around the pod.
Here's where the fuck up happens.
I grabbed something soft,similar to the feeling of the pods but oh so different."What the fuck is this?" I think to myself as i give it a gentle squeeze. Then,out of nowhere, I smell this huge wave of shit . Apparently one of my little siblings picked up some of our dog's dropping and thought "I can put this dog shit in this bag and take it upstairs later". I look down and see the biggest piece of dog shit smeared all on my fingers.
So here I am, trying to wash dog shit off of my bare hands.... | Went to do laundry,picked up dog shit with no hand condom. |
t3_142dh8 | AskReddit | Reddit, I saw a corrupt cop minutes before he was killed, what murders have you (almost) witnessed? | Here is some backstory. I was at the park around 12AM one night with some friends, we actually just got done shooting some hoops, and walking around the scary dark park. Car was parked next to the bathhouse, friends came back from bathhouse and we had the light in the car on and it was freezing, so we were trying to warm up before we took off with the heater on full blast, just talking away.. So light on, and it started to fog up the windows.. A COP pulls up behind us and blocks us in gets on the loud horn and starts talking, we can't understand what the fuck he is saying.. Sounds like get out with your hands up and stand against the car, we all do(At this point we think he's running the license plate #, which is why he blocked us in) We just got out and had our hands up in the air and flat against the vehicle, he pulls back, and yells this time..GET OUT OF THE PARK. We're dumb. We get in, and start to leave, the cop drive up this little incline to the picnic area and watched us leave. On the way out there were 3 black escalade coming down the road.. Cop was doing a drug deal.. DAMN We get out of there. News next day: Cop found dead in park, 2 shots to the chest. Dead cop, and the last thing on his mind was probably 3 guys having sex in a car. | Cop was thinking about 3 guys having sex before being shot in a drug deal by the park cartel. |
t3_2slgcf | relationships | Me [28 M] with my wife [28F] 2 years, weird fight and she refuses to explain her position to me | Very simple: we were about to engage in some sexy times. I went to go to the bathroom. When I got back, she made a comment about how I left the door open and all the stink will get let out, so I went to go close the bathroom door. I came back and said I wouldn't say that to her if we were in opposite positions. I wasn't upset, just that is how I felt.
And she became extremely upset with me. She said sexy times were off the table. I could tell she was mad so that was no surprise or concern - I'd rather figure out the fight. She says I'm accusing her of being a bitch. I am not, just that like, hey, if we are about to do intimate things together, regardless if you're joking or not that's not a great thing to say? (In regards to stinky bathroom)
She refuses to end the fight because, in her words, she resolves all of our fights. I told her I feel like we resolve them together - that's what couples do. She said I have to figure this one out on my own - I feel like that is unfair. I'm trying to be communicative and open to her communication. Just really confused as to what is going on here. I wasn't even upset when I told her "I wouldn't say that to you". I just meant to say that it is hard to feel sexy in the face of comments of hers(even if she meant to be not serious).
Help? | I communicate my feelings to wife, she gets upset with me but won't explain why. |
t3_4861lv | relationships | Me [25F] and partner [30M] haven't had sex since October | We've been in a relationship for nearly *7 years*, live together, have a toddler.
Our relationship is very similar to best friends living together though. We haven't had sex since October, before that I can't remember entirely.
I know we've only had sex 6 times in over a year. Before that it was fairly infrequent too, to put it in perspective, he's never gone down on me.
I truly love this man. But he just doesn't want me. I've tried changing things up. Buying nice underwear, but he's not interested.
I've tried talking to him about it, but he blows it off and tells me I'm being silly, he's just not in the mood etc.
I'm at the end of my tether, and need to know if this is fixable. | my boyfriend and I have less sex in a year than most couples have in a week. |
t3_42v0zp | Advice | Been incredibly skinny for whole life, looking to put on some weight | I'm [16|M] and for as long as I can remember, I've been skinny. This is due to my dangerously high metabolism that has never slowed down. Recently, I've decided that I wanted to put on some substantial weight, but have been unable to gain a thing. I'm currently 8st 4lbs and 6ft. I'm underweight and always have been and honestly, I don't feel comfortable in a skinny body. I believe that I will feel more comfortable and happy in a bigger, softer body.
Any ideas on how I can put on some weight? I should point out that I live with my parents, who can't know about me trying to gain weight, as they'll poke fun at me, which will ultimately lead to me feeling worse about my body. Eating more doesn't do much for me thanks to my metabolism, so if anyone has a way around this, that would be wonderful. | Dangerously skinny, looking to put on some fat-weight. |
t3_22ze5y | relationship_advice | I'm a [23/M] with [22/F]: FWB wanting a relationship | Hello Reader,
I'm currently in a strange pickle, and I need your advice/opinion. This is a woman I can see myself with. We've been talking since the new year, and have recently made advances in our relationship (sex.. and all that jazz). I brought up the talk about "dating", and to my surprise we aren't on the same page. She got out of a long relationship (3 years), but claims wanted out after 1. She insists that she MIGHT change her mind in a month or two, but that isn't fair for me to wait around her finger. I'm confused/torn emotionally because I cannot level with only being a friend with a benefit. We get along and are incredibly happy around each other. I 100% understand I cannot force a committed relationship, but my question is what is my next step? Do I push her away? See other women? Stick it out?
Also, I feel I'm committing too much time/seriousness into this relationship. IE: she'll tell me how she has a few "dates" in the near future (nothing happens), and ill ask them how they went. They're totally harmless to us, but what does that say about her as a potential girlfriend?
I really want this to work out in the end, but it's difficult for me to only enjoy her "company" (if you know what I'm saying). I need some type of guidance. | Girl only wants to be friends with benefits. I personally want more. What do I do? |
t3_21if5i | jobs | Resignation: Email or Phone? | I'd like to mention that I looked around for a couple subreddits on where to post this, and I decided here wasn't a terrible idea. Apologies if there is a more appropriate subreddit.
With my current employer I am a remote employee. They're based in another state and I perform mobile repair on computers and systems for various companies. I do have a (I think) supervisor here in my city, but I do not see them face-to-face. Most contact is done via phone or email.
And before we get too out of hand on the subject I would like to state that this company is extremely unorganized and sends me on calls that either shouldn't have been created, loses or sends too many parts, or generates tickets that already have a technician dispatched to them. They have also messed up my benefits in which I have none now.
This doesn't sound TOO bad, to be honest, but I have received little to no training on anything and when I ask for assistance they typically tell me to look it up on the help website and send me on my way. I was told I'd ride along with someone for about 2-3 weeks when in reality I was sent 3 days with them and they were in a completely different part of the company.
Anyways, my question is: is email or phone best? The option for face-to-face is not possible. I really have no idea who my -true- supervisor is as they've given me three contacts in case I need to get a hold of someone, so I was just thinking an email to these three would be best. | Job has no face-to-face. I am a remote employee. Company is terribly unorganized and has gone back on what I was told during the hiring process. I have also been with the company for just under a month. Is an email resignation acceptable? |
t3_2m8mwk | relationships | Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of 3.5 years, problems with trust and jealousy, need some advice/reassurance | So she has a programming project that's due tomorrow at 6:00pm that she needs 100% on in order to pass the class. She told me she's meeting up with her friend and classmates (1 girl, 3 guys) after class to work on the homework together in the library (help each other debug and stuff). I don't know anything about the guys except for their names. But I had no problem with this since she needs as much help as possible, and she's going with her female friend. So they start working on the homework together getting lots done. They were planning on working until the AMs to get the homework finished (this is an important information).
But here's where I got a bit uneasy: the guys suggested to continue doing the homework in one of the guy's house off campus (my gf's dorming on campus). Everyone in the group was okay with it. I got home just in time for her to ask me if I was okay with it. She was on the fence about it because on one hand it "seemed sketch" but on the other hand it was homework and her friend was coming. I was not okay with it at all so I told her that. She said okay and then she told her friends about it.
I asked her what she would have done had she not been able to contact me (which was very likely since I just got home when she messaged me) and she said she would have gone to this guy's house (who I barely know), with her friend but 3 other guys, off campus, AND staying there working on the homework until the morning. I'm worried at how she'll handle future scenarios where I won't be there to catch it beforehand. | I'm very uneasy with how my girlfriend would have handled this situation had I not caught it beforehand. |
t3_2geizh | relationships | Me [16 M] with *girlfriend* [15 F] 2 weeks, led me on and played me. Maybe shes confused ? | I have been talking to this girl for awhile with the clear and obvious intention to date her. She knew that from the start and was very flirty with me. So 2 days ago, on friday, I asked her on a date. She saw somebody she knew there and I heard her say that sunday, today, is her 7th month anniversary with a guy. So I assumed they had been in a long relationship and broken up 7 months ago because why would she not tell me she has a boyfriend and why would she act casual about it if she didn't have one ?
The date went great. I asked her about the guy and she said that sunday is her 7th month anniversary with him. She said that his phone broke, and his parents took away his computer and they go to different schools so she rarely talks to him. I told her I dont want to be just friends, she said thats all we can be right now and she would date me if she didnt have a boyfriend.
I was outraged and very upset. She even told me she cares about me more and likes me more then him, and im more important to her then her boyfriend. Like what ?
It really kills me knowing today she's probably making out with her guy... Honestly I can't just be friends with her. I really like her. I dont want to use some ultimatum, I just want her to know that I really dont want to be just friends. Her relationship looks like its going downhill fast so maybe I can get her to break up.
Thoughts ? | Girl knows I really like her. She shows signs of liking me a lot. Goes on a date with me. I find out she has a boyfriend, their 7th month annivarsary is today. I confront her and she says that we can only be friends, would date me if she didnt have a boyfriend. Boyfriend has no way of communicating and she goes to a differnet school. Her relationship seems to be going downhill fast, may be able to get her to date me. I cant just be friends and i really like her.... |
t3_o10kt | relationship_advice | My boyfriend cheated on me... So I cheated on him | Background: We are both 20, he went travelling last year and slept with a random girl, and also fooled around with a few more. I found out but tried to give him a chance.
It ate me up for about three months- I couldn't bear it. Everytime I closed my eyes I could see him with these other girls and we had numerous long talks about it which didn't make much progress.
So I kissed a guy at a party. I slept with another at a seperate occasion and made out with two other men. The weirdest thing is, I don't feel bad about doing it, I feel like we are even now and I don't think about it much. But I wonder if I should tell him. I have done the exact same thing as what he did. I haven't told him and our relationship is stronger than ever... All of this was two months ago. If you were him, would you want to know? | Boyfriend slept with a girl and fooled around with 3. I slept with a guy and fooled around with 3. I have no regrets but no desire to do it again. Should I tell him? |
t3_392coo | relationships | My girlfriend [F, 20] is telling me [M, 24] I have low standards of attractiveness and being insulting | Mistakenly referred to a close friend's sister as "really hot" and my gf got super mad. I met his sister once and she lives states away. Literally nothing happened between us. So she refused to tell me something was wrong for 30 minutes and then finally said it made her feel weird and said I apologized so that was that. Her tone made it seem she was trying to cut the convo short and after me stopping her from turning on the radio instead of talking to me more, she got mad and got out of my car at a red light and walked ~1 mile back to my house... She then told me this other girl isn't attractive at all but in reality she is a model and is pretty. I'd gone to a concert with her and her brother and we small talked a bit then I added her on Facebook, my gf just found this out and got even madder.. I never messaged this girl or did ANYTHING, just added her.... I totally get her feeling weird and I've apologized profusely. Then she says "I'm not okay with feeling paranoid about something that fucking stupid, especially whenever it seems like you think pretty much anyone of any attractiveness level ever is hot to be brutally honest." She's said that before and I told her it's insulting but she keeps saying that. Yeah my exes are about half as physically attractive as her, but my last gf was 2 years ago. I understand her frustration but at the same time, just get over me dating ppl you don't think are attractive and stop arguing my opinion of attractiveness... Is she crazy or am I unsympathetic? | Accidentally referred to my friend's pretty sister who I met once as "really hot". Apologized profusely. Gf still feels really weird and continually tells me something like "you have shitty tastes in women" and "I'm not okay with feeling paranoid about something that fucking stupid, especially whenever it seems like you think pretty much anyone of any attractiveness level ever is hot to be brutally honest." Is she too self-conscious or am I not fully understanding? |
t3_3i6kfj | loseit | First Post & a few NSV! | So sorry if I breach some kind of reddit protocol, but first post so bear with me. Also Hello all, you've been great so far :)
I'm 31, and currently just under 100kg (220lb), 166cm (5'4) and have lost around 30kg (highest weight 130kg+ (286lb)! I've been waiting for that scale to read less than 100 for a couple of weeks but it went straight from 101 to 99.6 in a few days, finally :)
I started losing weight two years ago when i first got my dog, after just too much frustration. I counted calories and walked the dog for the first year and lost around 20kg (44lb) just doing that.
I got fell off the wagon with the counting calories, but a year ago i joined a gym and "thought that would help". Obviously since then i've realised that its not going to help much if i don't watch my food properly as well, even though i was making healthy choices, and i only lost 10kg this past year. (the last 4 in the last 2 months). So back to Counting calories again, and seeing great progress - enough that it finally might stick! I never want to go back to my highest weight
This week i realised both that some of my pants are DEFINITELY too big now, AND i moved from a 10" box to a 12" box for box jumps. Getting strong and starting to trust my body FTW
Obviously my onederland is not your onederland, but next goal is is 200lb :). My goal weight is somewhere between 75-80kg for now. (160-170lbs)
For reference my then and now photos (i have very few photos - you all know that story - of my highest weight, so its hard to tell how much my body really has changed) (*cringes at my old arms*) not big on having my picture on the internet but oh well. | 2 years of slow progress but finally got to 100kg! Ready to speed things up by going to the gym AND counting calories. Does anyone else look at their body parts and just go...who do you belong too you're so slim |
t3_3ru8sb | running | I think my running may have just saved a little girls and her moms life... | So I commute to and fro NYC via NJ rail. Today I got off in Newark to visit a friend and have a few drinks. We were about a 15 minute drive from Newark Penn station. After having a good time I called a cab to get back and make the train I needed to get home, but after a bit it never showed up. I called back and they said "oh sorry we don't have any cabs in the area", gee thanks.
So I did some quick math and determined that I'd miss the train if I waited for another cab+ride. So I started to run. About halfway into it I'm coming up on a house with a gated driveway and I hear screams, from a child. Turns out there was a domestic dispute going on with a man wailing on a woman, presumably the little girls mom. The little girl runs out of the driveway screaming and I usher her around the corner. If you know anything about Newark is that the police are always out on a call. So I sprint less than two blocks and I come across a cruiser with his lights on in the median. I tell him there is a violent domestic going on around the corner and a little girl and mom are in danger.
He rushes over in his cruiser and I run back to where the little girl was hiding. Once a second cruiser showed up I left her with them and took off running again for Penn Station. I ran faster than I usually do thanks to the adrenaline, and the passing cruisers on their way to the scene made me feel like a hero. So here I sit, still shaky on the train, albeit a later one but well worth it for the mom and daughter. I think I'll go for a 2-miler when i get home now. | decided to run instead of taking a taxi and stopped a domestic assault because of that decision to run. |
t3_x7nq2 | AskReddit | Lie your ass off about everything and only tell people what they want to hear. Reddit, what are some lessons you've learned the hard way? | Drove 30 minutes to an Air Force recruiting office, and I was about to get my date setup to take the ASVAB and everything was about to be gravy. My dumbass mentioned that I've smoked weed in the past (It's been over a year since I've done it) and because of that he wasn't able to work with me. He said I should talk to another recruiter that is closer to my location and emphasized that I "re-think" the amount of times I've smoked weed (I told him I did it 15 times) so he pretty much told me to lie my ass off when I see a different recruiter. There's some more details I left out but that's pretty much the main reason why he can't work with me despite other reasons. Went home and got chewed out by my parents, and now I'm not sure what I'm going to do. | DON'T EVER ADMIT TO ANYTHING THAT COULD FUCK YOU OVER. IF ANYONE ASKS: YOU'VE NEVER DONE DRUGS, NEVER HAD SEX, NEVER HAD ALCOHOL, ect. |
t3_18gr3e | BreakUps | I(20m) want to tell my exgf(19) everything | my exgirlfriend came by today to have some lunch. She asked if we could so I said yeah why not. (note the we broke up a year ago and we havent spoken to each other for 7 months.)
We ate in my room because thats where we usually hangout. Eat, movies, etc.
after we ate we got in a little playfight with her ended up straddling me. We ended up cuddling and she asked isnt it weird that it feels we never broke up when we are in your room then she asked me questions like "what happened to stuff I gave you... did you miss me or how is your love life" I lied to her.. I dont know what happened.. yeah and i'm not looking for anyone..
She then asked me if I wanted to see a photo of the guy she's seeing and I'm not gonna lie, he looks a lot better than me. He can grow a beard too and looks taller haha. So i dont why but I said sure why not, obviously. She said that he reminds her of me in a way, and that we're both gemini. At this point I want to tell her that seeing her was a mistake. I wanted to tell her that I threw away the stuff she gave me, I did miss you and I grew out of it and learned how to forget that we had history and she even existed and that she ruined love for me, which she did. I'm having difficulty to try to "fall inlove" again. (I just dont think authentic "love" exist anymore)
After all that, she gave me a hug that lasted for awhile. She dug her head in to my neck ( i dont know what that meant) | Now I am just here thinking.. I should give her a text saying that "today was a mistake. i shouldn't have seen you. I don't want to be friends with you. I learned to forget we existed before you contacted me. I was really happy before you contacted me again. I wish you never contacted me. But I am glad that you are happy, honest to God. But us two being irrelevant to each other is a great thing. Especially for me. I hope you understand. There's a reason that we havent spoken in months and I believe that this is it. We were not meant to know each other. i dont need you in my life just as much as you need me in yours. I strongly believe that. and don't reply back just end it like this, this is my closure. |
t3_he1b5 | AskReddit | A time when your friend really had your back? | Couple nights ago my girlfriends friend assumed due to some inconclusive evidence that I had cheated on said girlfriend (i didnt). She deemed my girlfriends brother who I had been out all night drinking with to be the only person that could confirm that I hadn't. When he didn't pick up his phone I called my friend up and prayed he would go along with whatever I said in front of my girlfriends friend. Not only did he pick up on the situation completely, he did his best to do an impression of her brother when I passed her the phone. Even funnier, her brother thinks to this moment that I had actually called him because he was blackout drunk. | my friend got me out of a potentially sticky situation with my girlfriend by being awesome. |
t3_28ficp | tifu | TIFU by trying out something new. | TIFU! So, I work at a large retail store, which I won't name for the sake of keeping my job. Anyway, I am a pretty good salesman, but I tend to repeat myself to each of the customers I see. I have a coworker, Frank, who is always giving me hell because I say the same thing over and over again. So, today I decided to change up things with ways I phrase offering help to customers. So I am walking down the aisle, and I see an elderly man who is staring at the wall, just kind of looking at our wall of stuff in the room he was in. He is facing the wall, not me. He doesn't really change that situation when I greet him. I can only see his left side. Anywho, I decide to substitute saying, "Let me know if you need some help" with "Let me know if you need a hand." He turns around to look at me then. And my stomach kind of drops, and I'm mortified to see that he doesn't have a right arm! It's amputated at the shoulder. I feel awful, and I apologized profusely, but the damage was done. | I asked an amputee if he needed a hand. |
t3_23otgf | Parenting | 9 month old won't eat solids, help! | My daughter was EBF until 6 months and has been eating solids 3 times a day for about 2-3 months. She seems to enjoy eating, when she feels like it but seems to enjoy the breast more. She will only eat a good sized (2-3tbsp) meal every 3 or so days, usually we struggle to get 1 tbsp down per meal. In her high chair she is uninterested in food and would rather chat at me or the cat, play with the clips on her seat, look at the fridge, etc. She is very easily distracted. I follow her cues and stop feeding when I think she has had enough, usually a meal lasts 30-45 minutes. Then I offer the breast, since she hasn't figured out any kind of cup for drinking water and she drinks a normal meal amount of breast milk which leads me to believe she could have eaten way more solids than she did.
I intend to BF her until she is a toddler (2-3 years old) and want to have her down to just bedtime and through the night feeds by the time she is 12-14 months. I just have no idea what I am doing. She doesn't seem to have increased the amount she eats at a meal since we started solids. I have seen kids her age pack away the food. How can I help her to get more interested in eating and less into nursing so that we can start to wean? Any help or ideas would be appreciated.
Side note: I was concerned about this but not worried until I spent the weekend with my in-laws and all we did was clash about how little she eats, how she doesn't open her mouth and about what I feed her, specifically don't feed her, but that's another post all together. | Baby prefers breast milk to solids, in-laws have me worried. How do I get her to eat more real food? |
t3_16t4es | AskReddit | Does anyone have any knowledge of these numbers 48° 44' 35.1414" -120° 16' 10.434" especially if you are Washington state | 48° 44' 35.1414" -120° 16' 10.434"
posted by
ninemilethrowaway
under
**What's a secret you have sworn never to tell, but you'll gladly share anonymously on the internet?**
Disturbingly similar to the post on 4chan a while back.
Someone then posted a link that
at -N48 47.240 W 120 19.274-
is a geocache for
Patrick Sherman's Grave
Next link following Patrick Sherman's Grave search is the following:
Michael "Patrick" Sherman, 32, of Bettendorf, passed away unexpectedly at home on Thursday, Sept. 29, 2011.
*"ninemilethrowaway near Eight Mile Ridge...about 150 feet from a dead end road in Okanogan National Forest in Washington state"*
Link to orig post: | Sketchy Post...Could be the commission of a crime, |
t3_ry0xc | AskReddit | Advice on the music industry? | I am trying to find some fellow redditors who have worked in the music industry and could give advice to a soon to be graduating college student on how to get a job in the music industry in general, and more specifically with an independent electronic music booking agency.
Music is a huge passion of mine and it is my dream to be able to work with musicians in a booking and management setting. Throughout college I have tried to make myself more marketable for this type of work by working many DJ shows, managing and doing bookings for local DJs and live acts and making myself as knowledgeable about this industry and type of music as I possibly can.
I will be graduating in a few weeks and have been trying since January to find employment in this field. I know it's an extremely difficult field to break into and its going to take a lot of work, but I am willing to work for this and I am willing to start at the bottom, I just need advice on how to get there. There are seldom job listings and I just can't seem to find an "in."
Fellow redditors, do you work in the music industry doing anything like production, management, bookings, A&R, publicity, marketing, events planning, etc? I would love to hear your experiences, how you got your job and any advice you want to give to someone trying to break into this field.
If you are a musician/producer/DJ and have anything to add, I would love to hear from you too! | Soon to be college student wants to know how you got your job in the music industry and any advice you could give to help her on her job quest. |
t3_2avq23 | relationships | how can I [18M] tell my girlfriend [18F] of 8 months i need more intimacy? | not sure how to start this off, i'm awful with writing so excuse anything i mess up on.
we have been dating for 8 months, knew each other for 9. we see each other about once or twice a week due to work schedules/school. when we do see each other it normally starts out we either do something fun, go see a movie, hang out at each others house and one of us cooks something and watch TV. normal stuff, near the end we will kiss and for a while she would straddle me and we would make out.
but *everything changed two weeks ago*
she went to this "catholic teen conference" with her youth group. it was a three day thing and they weren't allowed any type of electronics.
when she got back we hung out the day after (on tuesday) she told me she doesn't want to make out anymore and doesn't want to kiss as much. and doesn't wants to cut back on the cuddling because "it just doesn't feel right."
what the fuck. i drove her home and it was really nice out and sunny so we decided to take a walk before i left. she told me she cared a lot about me and that she wanted to share what she learned with me.
the way she was talking it sounded like she was brainwashed there. i am not very religious but i believe in the bible. but the things that she said.. freaked me out honestly.
we talked when the relationship first started and she said she didn't want sex till marriage, i was okay with that as long as we could make out/do some touching and other things. well now shes cut that out and i wont be able to last. i love her so much but i express my love through physical touch and being close. she said she feels the same way. i don't want to lose her but we've been dating for 8 months and she doesn't want to make out because it "feels wrong"
i swear she changed after going to that "revival" thing. and this relationship isn't going to last unless we can come to an understanding, how can i explain that to her without sounding like a dick? | girlfriend doesn't want sex, i'm okay with that. girlfriend went to a catholic revival retreat for three days, day after we hang out on tuesday and she tells me she doesn't want to kiss as much, no more making out, and no more cuddling/touching. |
t3_2ugh8p | relationships | After finding and losing an incomparable connection with someone, how did you maintain hope that you could find that again? | He was my best friend, then eventually my boyfriend (I am a female), and we were both 19. Our relationship lasted around a year, but we were friends long before. It's been a little over nine months since things completely ended, and I still struggle with this. I cannot put into words what our connection was like. I only know that it was the strongest I've ever felt about anyone or anything, and I'm terrified that I will never find this again.
Towards the end of our relationship, he decided he no longer wanted to be in my life, and we haven't talked since. | How do you maintain hope after losing what you believed to be your soulmate? |
t3_3o17ae | relationships | Worried about my Siblings and their SOs | I have a step brother (age 16) in High school whom every day, comes home with his girlfriend, spends all day with her, and then she goes home. Or some form of spending all the time together.
He barely is seen around the house, hardly helps out around the place.
My sister is nearly the same, but its in an unhealthy way.
I feel what they are getting into isn't healthy and my parents set very bad relationship skills on the kids. They got a divorce and after two years it finally was "finalize" just recently.
Ive only seen my sister and her bf fight before, never my step brother and his SO but I feel they spend too much time with them over all and its not going to be healthy. Step brother doesn't really have any true hobbies, skill sets, and I worry about my brother more then my sister in the end. I don't know how to reach out to him.
Sister is 20, but entering that stage where she could end up marrying this guy. And shes beginning to realize that the guy is manipulative and the best guy when it comes down to it. | Is it healthy for a sibling to spend all their free time with their girlfriend/boyfriend, and hardly be around the house, and when they are they do the bare minimum of contributing. |
t3_306o0x | relationships | The first person [21M] to ever pursue me [20F] said we shouldn't be together because we're depressed | I'll try my best to be concise with the story lol. Basically, I've been single my entire life and no one has ever shown interest in me, which has caused me a great deal of distress and has resulted in an extremely low self esteem. I've also been struggling with a lot of depression lately that has made these issues worse.
About a month ago, I met the first ever person to tell me FIRST that he liked me and pursue me. It was such a foreign feeling to me, I had never experienced anything like it! We only spoke for like a week but we really connected and were very very similar. He made me feel special for the first time. He even tweeted about meeting me!!!! >.< He was depressed too, but I felt like that was something that strengthened the connection between us because we knew what the other person was going through. He always would ask me how I was feeling, and I always honestly replied.
Then one day, he told me that he really liked me and thought i was really great and all that jazz but he didn't think we should continue to develop our relationship because we both were really depressed and that type of relationship isn't healthy for either of us. he said he wanted to be friends and maybe more in the future but we just shouldn't talk for a while while we work on ourselves. needless to say i was devastated, but i took it as a wake up call b/c he wasn't the first person in my life to leave me because of my depression. Ever since then I've been really working on myself and have felt my outlook on life change slowly, but I have no idea what to do. I've casually messaged him like twice (was drunk both times lol) and he only responded once but we didn't have a conversation. he deleted me off of snapchat too. this was all a month ago, do i have to just wait until he decides to message me? is there any way i could talk to him? or should I wait until i just happen to run into him sometime and say hey in person? | met a guy, i liked him, he was the first person to like me, i was happy, he said we shouldn't be together because we're both depressed & its not healthy, its been a month and i've been working on myself a lot & don't know what to do |
t3_2l5f2s | relationships | Unsatisfying relationships? | Hi there, reddit. I'm turning to the last source I can confide in. 22/F dating a 22/M. We live together. We've been together now for three years. I've been working all these years while attending college full time. He's not been working, since his college is paid for. We don't pay for our living situation.
He is an amazing person. He's very relaxed, calm, laid back person. He doesn't smoke or drink. He never fights or curses.
He doesn't like to talk much, either. Which I found to be just fine at the *beginning* of our relationship.
We are both avid video game players, it's our passion. I would be sad if I don't get my fix of Dark Souls or League. He plays at least 12 hours a day.
Now.... this is the issue. Every day is the same. I come home from work or school. He's been playing his video game for 12 hours straight and gets tired so he goes to sleep. We're barely awake at the same time, and when we are, he's only on his computer.
He doesn't want to hang out with my friends. He doesn't want to leave the house. I've accepted that. He's a complete hermit, on his computer all day unless he's doing homework. He isn't romantic. I've accepted this, too.
But this can't keep going on, can it? Is our entire relationship going to be like this?
Just recently I've been trying to talk to him more. I'll ask him to talk to me for at least ten minutes, but even so, he wouldn't talk to me unless I pull him off from his games.
Now I'm feeling that our relationship is only physical. I get home. We have sex. I ask him to talk to me for ten minutes. We go do our own thing.
What do I do? I'm bored. I'm unhappy. I hang out more with my friends than I hang out with him. I talk more with my best (guy) friend more than I talk to him | Our relationship is comfortable. He's a very nice, calm, 'perfect' guy. But he barely leaves the house, is more interesting in playing games than talking, isn't interested in my friends. His only passion is video games. He's "great" but he's not romantic or interested in what I do unless I tell him. We're comfortable together, but I'm immensely unsatisfied. |
t3_42yqs3 | relationship_advice | I'm [19F] worried about the future with my boyfriend [22M]? | We have been dating for about a year and we've had our ups and downs but we work through our problems really well and in the end we just want to be together.
Lately I've been worrying about our future because he's graduating college in about a year and I'm still going to be in school for another two years. He's mentioned that he wants to be with me for as long as he can but isn't think about marriage yet. He's also said that he really likes spending time with me and it'd be horrible to see things end. What has made me doubt this is he's said stuff like: "Oh that's kinda weird that they're still dating since he comes back from school and she comes back from work." I'm kinda scared for what's going to happen if he goes on an internship away for 4 months or after he graduates. I'd really like to be able to be with him for a while and make it work, but sometimes I feel like he isn't as serious. Should I talk to him about this (and if so how should I even bring it up) or should I stop worrying about the future? I just really want this relationship to work out because I love spending time with him. | Boyfriend is graduating in a year, I'm scared for our future together because I want to make it work, even if he moves away or something like that. Should I talk to him about it or just simply stop worrying and enjoy the moment? |
t3_3guxrc | relationships | My [32 M] ex [37 F] sent me a message recently after a year of no contact. | So we went out separate ways about a year and a half ago after she abruptly ended things while she was going through some other life issues. I took it hard and tried to talk it out, but to no avail.
Now I know that it means nothing and I'm doing my best to keep that frame of mind, but she sent me a message recently relating back to one of our inside jokes, which was basically a picture of someone in a somewhat ridiculous costume. I replied with a quick joke and figured that would be the end of it, but she responded saying that "seriously if anyone could pull of that look it was was me" and I left it at that.
About a month later I ran into her where she proceeded to chat my ear off until I said I had to get going after about 10min. Talking about nothing in particular really, as we often before would just have long, pretty funny conversations about absolutely nothing. Just the two of us basically expanding on a joke, which was one of the things I enjoyed most about being with her. The two of us could come up with something we found funny, then expand on it to make it some elaborate story.
Then again recently she sent me another message of a new mixed drink she was having that night saying how good it was and that I was going to have to try it. This led into another random text conversation about nothing, but still incredibly entertaining.
Like I said before, I'm doing my best to see it as meaning nothing more than I had crossed her mind and she figured it has been long enough for us to try and be friends again, but I've never had an ex try to reconnect as if nothing had ever really happened.... I don't plan on messaging her to start any conversations, but I'm wondering if I should stop responding if I hear from her again. Honestly every time shes contacted me recently I have just assumed it was for the last time and I would never hear from her, but then I do. | After a year of no contact, ex msgs me and jokes around like we used to and I don't know if I should just ignore it or just go with it. |
t3_41srhw | relationships | My [18 F] boyfriend [19 M] of a year and a half, left but wants to be friends, how long before that starts? | My relationship with my boyfriend was born in long distance. We got closer through mutual friends the summer before his freshman year of college while I was still a senior in high school. We slowly became closer and closer friends over text, until right before we got together I was referring to him as my best friend.
I'd say we had a good relationship, we had our ups and downs and long distance was hard, but overall I was very happy. Just for reference this was my first ever relationship, his fourth, but the longest he had ever had by 14 months.
Sunday night, around 12am, he called me crying saying he could no longer keep our relationship up, and explained that after some contemplation he realized he couldn't see a future with me and his emotions and feelings toward me had changed, and he wanted to leave as to not, "lead me on," and make it hurt more in the long run.
He still wants the chance to be friends with me, and I do as well, he's a really good guy and we're very similar in personality and interests and I would love to get back to talking to him like we used to before we got together, but I don't know how long I should take to give myself space to get over what seemed like a very abrupt breakup. | My boyfriend dumped me a night ago, but wants to stay friends, how long should I wait before i make a move in that direction? |
t3_3ikfzl | relationship_advice | My (26f) ex fiance (28m) got cold feet and unexpectedly left me. I am in a new relationship (25m) and have a constant fear of abandonment. How do I overcome this? | I was with my ex fiance for 6 years, were engaged for 2. Just before I was starting to plan our wedding he got a shocking case of cold feet and packed up and left. It was completely unexpected and extremely heart breaking. It lead to heavy drinking and really bad depression. I finally put myself out there and found my actual soul mate (or i think he is anyways). We hit it off straight away and have been going out for a while now, also living together. The problem is that because I was pretty much abandoned, i have this fear that my new partner will do the same. It has made me insecure and paranoid that he will leave for no reason also.
I know they are 2 different people and love me in different ways but how do I overcome this fear before it becomes a problem (has not been a problem yet). Note: I believe fiance got cold feet because of his own issue. Basically had an almost perfect relationship | Ex fiance left from cold feet, now I have a fear I will be abandoned by my new SO even though there is no signs of it. |
t3_21b68x | relationships | Me [24 M] with my GF [23 F] of 3 months broke up - but neither of us really want it to end. | We've been dating for around 3 months now and have had an exceptional time together! Until this weekend!
Some back story - she was around 5 months out of a 3y relationship when we met and we've been together for 3 months since then. However this weekend she said she wasn't sure what she wanted anymore...I'm not sure how to handle it. I tried to convince her we should be together so that I can help her - but essentially she feels she has taken on too much too soon.
However she's said readily that she wants to be with me she just needs to deal with her own problems. But I don' want to let her go, I've tried convincing but it doesn't seem to work. She keeps changing her mind...and I've come to accept that if she's indecisive she shouldn't be with me...
She broke up with me on Sunday, but travelled over 100 miles to talk with me yesterday. She stayed the night. But told me this morning she needs time to sort her stuff out - that stuff being getting over her ex... | GF broke up with me, needs time to fix her problems but still wants to be with me - what do I do. Help me Reddit you're my only hope! |
t3_1so08h | relationships | Me [19 M] with my Ex [17F] duration, I have a crush on an acquaintance of hers, what do I do? | My ex and I have been shifting in and out of a relationship for a few months now after being together for about 6 months. We started on a break a few months ago, and got back together soon after, but then I found out that she slept with other guys on our break. I told myself that it wasn't actually cheating since we were on a break, and stupidly took her back, making her promise not to behave that way again.
Before I continue, I want to make it clear I'm not looking for advice on how to act with my ex, or criticism on my previous decisions. I'm aware I acted foolishly, but the problem I'm having came up recently.
Speaking with a mutual friend, I discovered that she had slept with another guy after I took her back a second time. I'm done with her, but the problem is that I've had a crush on someone she knows/ is relatively friendly with. This friend and I have been chatting since the breakup, and my feelings for her are only getting stronger. How do I proceed with pursuing the other girl? I genuinely like this other girl, but I don't want my ex to try to sabotage this potential relationship and I don't know what to do now. Any advice on how do continue would be appreciated, reddit. | I like the friend of a toxic ex, and want to know how to pursue a potential relationship with her. |
t3_2prgsm | legaladvice | I just met with Homeland Security. Help | Earlier today, DHS came to my work in Iowa to ask me questions on a case they're working.
As quick background, for probably 7 or 8 years (very off and on), I've used a fake persona to talk to guys for my own personal pleasure. I have portrayed a 17 year old girl, using pictures found online. It's wrong and gross, I know and I KNOW that I will never do this again because of what happened earlier.
They told me a guy I had a conversation with one day a few months ago has been caught with child porn. They found he had talked to me/my persona and wanted to ask questions. I sent him a couple of pictures of girls who, as far I know, were of legal age. They've also asked to take my phone and laptop to do a search on anything they might find. I declined right now as I'm going home this weekend for the holidays and need both while I'm there.
I have told them that I have talked to other people under this fake persona and have never sent pictures of girls whom I thought were underage. I don't recall if any person has tried to send me anything, or if they have, if I've opened them. I'm scared of them possibly finding something from way back I'm not thinking of and them somehow turning it around to charging me with child porn! I also have torrented movies/music on my laptop too...
I know this topic is a very sensitive issue, and I just don't know what to do. | DHS talked to me about a guy arrested for child porn. I've never taken nor sent child porn to anyone. They want to look at my laptop and phone. I'm afraid they might find something incriminating I'm not aware of and arrest me too. |
t3_wc9ng | AskReddit | Ever had catastrophic error in judging someone? I just did. | Three weeks ago, a friend of mine brought his grandmother to church. She was in town visiting for his HS graduation. He introduced me, and she was WILD. Hyper old lady. All fiesty. She looked (no judgement, just describing) like she was headed out for a day of shopping at garage sales and then to the bingo parlor. Skinny as a rail. Highwater cheap pants. Health shoes. Wild grey hair. Huge dentures. And a big fanny pack. She talked to me for a half hour. Told stories. Laughed. And away she went. My guess is she was dirt poor and had a zest for life.
She died this week suddenly. Just got a link from a paper in her home state. Turns out she was a "major cultural philanthropist" and a huge donor to the arts and especially ballet. Loaded. They say you can't hide money. "They" were wrong, and I'm in shock. | Met the queen of a trailer park who funded ballet. |
t3_1690o1 | jobs | I am torn between these two jobs ... | I just got my diploma in computer programming this week, and today I received two job offers, first one is in the military with a high starting salary but slow promotions as a private(which is way below what rank I should be starting at(master sergeant)with my degree and work experience) but it is still a very good paying job.
Now, the second job offer I got, is in the private sector, but way less starting salary (40% less) than the military but it does have more flexibility in promotions and advances, they are both in the IT department so they are both equal in that side. I love the military and do want to join them, but am afraid I'll be stuck in low ranks for most of my upcoming life(I am 24 years old) and the promotions in it are very strict.
Reddit, care to throw in your opinions ? | high starting salary and slow promotions VS low starting salary and faster promotions. |
t3_53ebol | relationships | Non-Romantic. How do you guys deal with passive aggressive people? | Just looking for some perspective and ideas. A specific example would be with my coworker. I find them super negative and passive aggressive. They are also overly friendly and chatty, where I am more quiet and don't really rely on work to make friends. And actually don't want just any friends at work, as I work in a stressful place and it's better to just keep things professional.
Anyway, my coworker is aware that I am not interested in being his friend and he seems quite offended. Sometimes when he sees me he greets me really loudly, asks a bunch of "how are you doing/what are you up to these days" kinds of questions, which I never answer anyway. And he also gives excessive compliments. I am cordial to him but do not participate in what I see as obnoxious baiting, and I ignore this. Can anyone offer advice or share situations? We are both in our 30's, since ages are asked for here.
Thanks | Coworker is passive aggressive, any ideas? |
t3_2xlcbm | needadvice | I (23F) unknowingly rented a car with an open container left in the back seat. Currently pulled over, possibly facing charges. Help. | Hi. I rented a Toyota Camry from car rental place yesterday in order to go on a mini-road trip a few hours away. Today, during a routine traffic stop, the policeman noticed an open container in the back seat of the car. My sister (also my coworker) used her company discount to rent the car, so she could be in deep trouble if I happen to get a ticket for this. I'm currently pulled over while the police officer discusses this with his colleagues.
On top of this, I can't get ahold of anyone from the car rental company. The over the phone reps I have spoken to have been incredibly rude and apathetic. Yesterday, the representative at the desk charged me twice what she quoted me originally, refused to take my company discount and would only take my sister's (even though we work for the same company). | open container that is NOT mine left in rental car that I just rented. Currently pulled over. What do I do here? Is the rental company liable, or am I? |
t3_30vnhk | tifu | TIFU, by speaking my mind & having a Seinfeld moment | TIFU, well it was last week. I'll make this short as possible.
So last week I'm heading to my Chem class. After I got in the class with the rest of the students, we realized that the teacher was running late. We waited 30 mins for her to show up and decided to leave. We were all pissed off since we had so much to review. We called her "unprofessional" and said "Where the hell is she." She didn't even email us that class was canceled. Then the next day of class, a substitute teacher comes in and tells us that our teacher lost her son in a car accident the other day. We were all in shock. The sub said if you want to pay your respects, you can send her an email. And I said jokingly:
"I hope that gives me some extra credit, ya feel me"
The sub turned her head and gave me the most deadliest death stare I ever had. I was picturing what would be on my tombstone already.
Just as things couldn't get fucked up, my friend calls me and I had the ringer on. So while the sub was giving me the death stare. My call tone was playing and all you hear is: | Opened my mouth at the wrong time and my Seinfeld call tone went off. I had a Seinfeld ending moment. |
t3_3p2q10 | relationships | I feel like I did something bad but at the same time I don't... | So I (F19) very recently came of a 1.5 year relationship with a guy and was now talking to a new one, (M24) I am not looking for anything serious and I had told him that he understood but yesterday we were hanging things got steamy and we were going back to his place when I got an emergency call and I sorta left him high and dry. I felt really bad and he thought I did it to not go back to his house but, I didn't. I texted him later that night, and he was fine. But he hasn't contacted me since and I feel bad but at the same time I don't, there was a family emergency. I really did have to go. Am I overthinking this? He used to text me all the time now it's nothing. | left guy on date high and dry with blue balls not on purpose but he thinks it was but I had a family emergency now he won't text me. |
t3_236ikr | relationships | I(24f) am not sure if it's PMS or a legitimate reason to be upset with (28m) 1.5 years | We have been on and off for a while now. When things are good, they are mind blowing. When things are bad, I just close myself off until I can deal with it.
We are currently in an "on" period. I still harbor some resentment towards him and his best friend from our last "off" period. She has a huge crush on him, and has for years, and when we broke up, she went around saying some nasty stuff about me and my relationship with him.
My opinion of the situation is that he should have confronted her, we were back on within a week, and I didn't feel it was my place to say anything. He felt that it didn't matter. It hurt me, a lot.
We have discussed this since then, and I never really felt like he was being completely honest with me.
I snooped. I know I shouldn't have, I know it was wrong. He had said that they haven't talked since we broke up the first time. He lied. After he changed his number, they talked and he sent his new number along with reassurance that she was a part of his life, and nothing would change that.
We talked a few nights ago and he said she didn't have his number, showed me his phone, quickly, to try to prove that they haven't talked. I know better.
Im hurt that he didn't defend me, he lied, and she doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I love him, and I don't want to leave or lose him.
Am I overreacting? | on/off again guy didn't defend me, lied and isn't likely to lose the friend who started drama. Am I overreacting? |
t3_1hznt3 | relationship_advice | [23/f] I see my boyfriend (27/m) once a week, twice if I'm lucky (usually involves me sleeping over). Is it wrong for me to get a little sad when he asks for some "me time"? | Throwaway account. We've been together for just over a year (second time around, first time around was a little less than a year), and throughout the entire relationship, this is how often we spend time together. We live about 15-20 minutes apart, and he doesn't have a car so it's already bad enough that I'm always the one that has to go out to see him and drive us around. He works full time usually from 7-4pm, pursues his physical hobbies after work and then either does his own thing for the rest of the night or he'll be gaming with his friends. We're both introverts/loners with separate friends and interests, so I'm accustomed to doing my own thing too and I totally understand wanting time alone. But I would still be happy to see him a little more often.
We usually spend the same day a week together, as it works best with his schedule. Last week I assumed I was spending the night on this day and brought it up, which is when he mentioned that he wanted some time to himself. He does this every now and then which is fine, but it makes things feel a tiny bit one-sided since I never find myself asking this of him. I only see the guy once or twice a week!
To be fair, everything else about our relationship is awesome and the fact that I'm currently unemployed (but may not be for much longer!!) and still living with my parents might have something to do with me feeling especially frustrated lately. He only lives with his roommate so staying over is kind of a mini vacation for me. Idk. It just sucks feeling like my bf prioritizes everything else in his life over me. | I'm pretty sure the title should sum it up. |
t3_4327k3 | relationships | Me [19F] in platonic setting, trying to convey more-than-platonic interest | So I have a group of friends 19-20M/F, we all have a great time together, closer with some than others but I still like all of them a lot. There's also a new guy [19M] that just transferred here. We only really know him because of one girl in our group (who I'm less close to, which is relevant) is previous acquaintances with him somehow, and from time to time he shows up to talk and hang out for a bit.
I see that many of my friends are still in the feeling out "oh that guy seems pretty cool" stage and wondering if he might be friends with us, like in our friendship group, but I do not want to be his friend. But I somehow feel like it's inappropriate and weird and wrong to express that kind of sentiment, either to any/everyone in the group, or in my behaviour towards the guy. If I was closer to the girl that already knows him I might tell her about that kind of stuff or ask a bit about what he's like but I don't know her as well either, and just would feel incredibly weird asking her about anything like that (especially, from the little we've spoken of him, the brief remarks she has made point to her thinking of this guy as a "who would ever think of him in *that* way?" kind of mentality, which makes me feel even more awkward for the fact that I do.) So I guess my problems and questions are multi-layered: 1) How do I make it clear to someone that I like them romantically, when I only ever see them in an environment where only platonic interactions seem appropriate (especially with how brief the time we see each other is) 2) I would like to get him more on his own but don't see how that is plausible without getting weird and 3) how do I make it that I'm considered as a romantic possibility instead of just one of the group? Simply, how do I go about dating this guy without it being weeeeeeird? | how to make clear to potential-friendship-group friend that you want to be more than friends? how to have reason to interact with him outside of the group in the first place? how to show I'm available to date as opposed to just available as a friend. |
t3_2cmj28 | tifu | TIFU by unknowingly turning down a hot gal | Okay this is my first reddit post,have always thought of joining and starting some discussions but never felt like asking something before today.(Myself :27/M/6'0/178 lbs with a decent job and an ambivert.I think m above average looking why I say so - based on my past experiences, but not really handsome).
So this is what happened on Saturday night which forced me to come here and ask you guys this -- We (my 2 friends and their gfs,) go in to a downtown bar and sit down to just have a good Saturday evening,as I walk in I notice a gal,she must be a 8 or 9/10 and I let any other thoughts go because apparently she is way out of my league and so no way interested in me and moreover there are guys with her,so probably one of them is her bf.Anyways fast forward - she gets a bit drunk and walks over to our table and started chatting up with me,I just take it casual assuming she is just being friendly,while her hands are on me.And after 3-4 minutes of formal talk she goes back and I just look back at my friends,who have now completely disgust face at me - Girls go berserk over me saying what the fuck did you just do,according to them she did everything to tell me that she is interested and I obviously a moron had no clue about it.Anyways the girl ended up going with this guy at the same bar who was definitely hotter than me,and also the girls(my friends) tried to hook me up numerous times later in the night,but I had lost interest with everything,just kept drinking and feeling like a stupid idiot looser
So my question to guys of Reddit - How do you tell if a gal is hitting on you ? | Fucked up by unknowingly turning down a hot gal. |
t3_4wp267 | needadvice | X-post r/raisedbynarcissists: My mom can't control her emotions and always angry. Is this normal? | Shes 44, female, worked overseas for 4.5 years.
Shes always pissed when someone don't get her point, and it's like it's impossible for her to be assertive. She can be assertive sometimes, but it always follows an aggression.
She can't talk calmly and always screaming when in an argument or when she engage in debate with someone.
When I do something wrong, she looks red and angry and namecalling.
She can't express herself assertively, and always with the cursing.
The sad part is she wont apologize for her behavior, like she wont realize that she did something wrong.
BTW her two legs was amputated months ago and suffers from phantom pain and post trauma depression.
She was raised by toxic parents and don't seem to realize it, assuming that they did it for her own good.
She's divorced for like 8 years ago and always acts like the victim.
We're muslim filipinos btw. And sorry for bad english. | She's an angry person and I hate it. Sometimes I just want to ignore her and never say anything when the fire burns me. |
t3_203qah | relationships | I (24f) am not sure if I should be as angry as I am at my sister (21f) for talking with my x(31m). | Okay, I dated my x, A for about three years. It was a very rocky three years. He was very controlling and mentally abusive. Always calling my dumb, making me feel worthless, all the while convincing me I needed him. I knew about a year and a half in, I needed to get out. Problem was, I lived with him. My sister lived with my mom in a two bedroom with her bf and I had no other family to turn too. I essentially stayed so long because I was stuck. My sister knew everything, and she ended up moving in with me and him, so I wouldn't be screwed if I left him. We all lived together for about a year, my sister and him never got along. She couldn't stand him and the way he would yell at me, treat me.. she was always on my case that I deserved better.
I eventually left, and stayed living with my sister and her bf before moving to the other side of the country to pursue my dreams. My sisters bf T and A are still friends and see each other. My sister will post a status on FB, A will reply saying he's excited to come over and hand with T and my sister say's she'll bring the beer. This has happened a number of times. I have talked to her once before and she said she didn't want to be rude, and obviously is not his friend, but her bf is. I get it, I do. She's not a rude person by nature, she's very kind. But she also stands up for those who have had wrong done by them. I think this is what bothers me the most. She's my sister, my best friend, and I feel that her talking to A is a betrayal after what he's put me through.
Am I in the wrong in feeling angry at my sister for continuing to talk to and have my emotionally abuse x go over to her house? | My X was abusive and controlling, my sister hated it and hated him. She helped me to get out of that relationship. She continues to talk to my X over FB, make plans with him, and invite him over "anytime" to hang out with her and her bf. I feel so angry and betrayed. |
t3_2lg69a | relationships | When should I [21 M] start paying for girl [21 F] I've been dating for ~2 months? | Is it dumb I don't think I have bought her anything yet? At the very early stages of dating, I keep thinking that "paying for a girl" is a sign of trying too hard... We're really attached to each other, we talk every day, hang out almost every day and have a really good time together. But the other day I was on a date with her, and some of her friends were there, one of them had a boyfriend (long term, distance relationship), and he paid for her dinner. But I didn't pay for my girl's dinner... Paying for a girl early on seems like its an attempt to "buy" her love... so I don't do it too early. But this got me thinking, when should I start paying for her food? And should I do it all the time? | I guess I should start doing it soon? and how much should I do it? |
t3_1k19ua | relationships | I [23/F] have recently become obsessed with marriage and I'm afraid it will scare my [27/M] boyfriend of 4 years. | Lately all I can think about it marriage! I think partially it is because my boyfriend just graduated and got a well paying job. We have always talked about the future in terms of growing old together and owning a house in the suburbs. But marriage almost never comes up. He's pretty skittish on making big moves in our relationship, he panicked up until the day we actually moved in together.
In my logical part of my brain, I know this isn't the right time- I still have another year left of school along with working two jobs. I have very little free time. However, my emotional side can't deal any longer! All I want to do is talk about getting engaged and getting married but mostly just being married. I really think I'm losing it.
We recently had a drunken heart to heart, where he told me that the whole permanence of marriage scares him. However, he said for a variety of reasons he wanted to wait to make any move until after I graduate. Logically, I agree this is the right move.
I need help to get my thoughts on track so I can finish school without entirely losing my mind. | I can't stop thinking about marriage and I want to stop before it scares my poor boyfriend. |
t3_4bziqr | relationships | Me [36 M] with mygirlfriend [38 F] of 8 months, I am wondering why I am beimg left out. | Today my girlfriend went for easter dinner at her son's aunts farm. I asked if I was invited and was told that she didn't think she was allowed to bring anyone.
I was fine with this until her daughter (different father) jumped in the truck to go with her boyfriend of two weeks to supper with everyone.
Previously I have been informed that her other boyfriends have gone to these events, the boyfriends were not even very good ones by the sounds of it as well. I plan on talking to her about this as soon as she returns but I am getting quite saddened by it at the moment so I need advice. Her sons father is dead so it doesnt seem to be an issue with that.
I feel bad because the daughters boyfriend is a massive drug addict and he gets invited over me. I was outside raking leaves when they left and just finished so now I need help, the only thing I can think of is that a while ago she said my random stories were a bit out of context sometimes and that most people will be unsure what I am talking about. I have been very vigilant about not wandering off topic and things of that nature in addition to talking less at gatherings. | Girlfriend takes her daughters drug addict boyfriend to easter dinner and leaves me at her place. What do I do? |
t3_1aryd2 | AskReddit | What run in with the law changed your life forever? | Mine happened to be when I was 15. At the time, lots of people I went to school with were in to "car hopping". That's simply opening unlocked car doors and stealing belongings from inside. Well one night, me and some friends snuck out of the basement, as usual, to prowl among the neighborhood. I never partook in stealing peoples shit out of their car before, I simply liked the rush of being out at 4AM and the risk of being caught. But tonight I wanted to get something. So we come up this long, steep driveway to this Suburban, friend opens the back door of it , grabs one of the guitars that was in there while I grabbed this cheap little amp. Of course the dogs inside the house start going crazy, leading to the owner running outside half naked and calling the cops. The cops show up within minutes (I live in a pretty boring town, not much must've been going on for the police to arrive that fast). After hauling ass down the street, we find ourselves taking cover in a sandtrap on the nearby golf course. With our hiding spot visible from the main road, we knew we had to get out of there and back to the house right away. Of course, at the moment of us creeping out of the ditch, a patrolling officer happened to be driving by with his searchlight on. It landed right on us, but we ran right back into the ditch. The light seemed to have stayed pointed at the sandtrap for ten minutes, hours it seemed like. Heart was beating faster than ever before. Here I am, 15 years old, with a stolen 75 dollar guitar amp and a dime sack on me. But then suddenly, the cop turned his spotlight away and continued on searching. At that moment in time I vowed to stop doing this stupid shit for good. Since then, multiple former friends of mine have been arrested for car hopping. If there is a god, that was a good wake up call. | Ran from cops with stolen goods as a minor, got inches away from being arrested for the first time. |
t3_1ztaaz | relationships | [25/f] dating [25/m]. Can Tinder ever be used innocently or am I just uptight? | I [25/f] have been dating A [25/m] for about 4 months. We are not an official couple, but things are pretty serious between us. He has told me he's in love with me and overall is very, very affectionate and wonderful. We see each other every day and have a wonderful friendship and physical connection. I'm REALLY into this guy.
We're both really open with one another about pretty much everything. We're not very private about our lives, so I found it weird when he suddenly started to get private about his phone. We had a short argument before he revealed that he's been using Tinder and carrying on long conversations with two girls on it. They've been texting back and forth for about 2 weeks pretty frequently, sometimes even when I'm hanging out with him.
I will admit that he let me read the conversation and everything was platonic (never asked to meet up or even complimented her or anything) but the whole thing just rubs me the wrong way. He says he didn't think he was doing anything wrong by talking to girls on Tinder just for entertainment and because he assumed I was doing so too, but it seems disingenuous for him to be telling me he's in love with me and I'm the only girl he's interested in, etc. and still be using Tinder. Is it possible that I'm just being uptight and this actually is really appropriate? | Guy [25/m] I [25/f] have been dating for four months has been having long conversations with girls on Tinder. They're innocent and he says he isn't doing anything wrong, but it seems weird to me to tell one girl you love her and have eyes for no one but her but still use a dating app. Am I being crazy? |
t3_414oyy | relationships | Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [24 F] for 7 months, she's my first gf and took my virginity, but now I don't think I'm ready to be committed | I have been with my girlfriend for about 7 months now and she is my first girlfriend. She's only the second girl I've dated so I'm not experienced at all. In addition, she took my virginity.
Here lies my issue. Everything was going great initially, but within the past two months I've been feeling like I'm not ready to be with anyone exclusively. I thought it was what I had wanted when I first dated her, but I'm not so sure anymore.
I feel like I need to get out and experience more in the dating world before deciding to settle down and have a girlfriend.
She's a great girl. Always kind and trying to help and always has me in mind, but I don't know if that's what I want. I feel smothered at times. I don't know if I'm being ignorant because I'm so inexperienced or if I truly feel that this isn't what I want.
I've read a few posts and a lot of them say that the grass is always greener on the other side. I'm not sure if that's necessarily true for me. I'm not sure what the right call is here so if anyone has been in a similar situation, any advice would be appreciated. | Not sure if I want to be in a relationship anymore and need advice. |
t3_emc7w | AskReddit | A Question for all you UK Redditors on the college tuition hike. | I was at some campus protests in England during the beginning of the year before they became much more frequent. As messed up as it is that your tuitions are going to be increased for the next upcoming terms, (which I do find appalling its 3x as much) I'm still wondering if you realize that the average American college student still pays exponentially more. I heard that the fee would increase from around 3200 pounds ( about 5000 USD) to about 9000 pounds (around 14,000 USD) a year for college.
I WISH I could pay that much a year for school. I pay 14k a SEMESTER, and that's still including scholarships I had to work to for. I have friends paying almost 40,000 USD a year despite having to pay off loans the rest of their lives. I'm just asking if any other UK redditors are aware of this. I'm in no way in favor of your tuition hikes, but I actually had an argument about this with someone from the UK that this wasn't "as bad as American tuition fees since our Universities always have been expensive". | Do UK students realize they are still going to be paying on average, less than the average American college student? If so, realize the realities and implications of families and students having to petition for more loans, and where you may be headed because of this? |
t3_22gtjt | relationships | My roommates [22F, 23F] didn't invite me [26F] to a mutual friend's bday and I feel awkward | My roommates and I are good friends. We have a mutual friend [25F]. It was her birthday, and the week before, I mentioned to both of them that it was her birthday and I'd love to chip in for a cake or something. Which they acknowledged.
The day they decided to go out was not on her actual birthday, and I only caught both of them on the way out. One of them got a card out and said, "Oh, can you sign this before we leave?" which I did, confused. "Are you going to see [friend]?" I asked. "Yep," she said.
And so they celebrated her birthday without me. I am not saying they were in the wrong. I don't think their intentions were bad. I don't know the circumstances behind planning the dinner/afterwards events and I know it wasn't personal. I know they didn't actively try to hurt me. Sometimes you can't invite everyone, and I understand.
But I can't help feeling a bit hurt and betrayed. I don't want to confront them because they really don't know what they did (they still keep talking about the event in front of me openly). And like I said, decisions of inviting or not inviting people are often not personal.
Now I can hardly look at them or talk to them and I don't know what to do. I guess if I'm not confronting them, I have to suck it up. But I just feel kind of distressed. Any tips on handling? | Roommates didn't invite me to mutual friend's bday. I know it probably wasn't personal but I still feel hurt and don't know what to do. |
t3_rk20y | AskReddit | There's a girl in my study session playing music on her laptop while the student instructor is trying to teach. Nobody minds except me. What do I do, Reddit? | I'm at a Supplemental Instruction class right now - a student teacher reviewing what we learn in class. It's very helpful and often times is better than class.
For whatever reason, this ~~dumb fucking cunt~~ girl next to me is playing sudoku on her laptop, blaring country music.
Nobody in the classroom, including the student teacher seems to mind. However, I'm getting a headache. Country music is my bane. Now, I'm not afraid to ask this girl to quiet it down, but the problem is I think everyone else in the class is enjoying it. I don't want to be a dick. | Girl is playing music, not studying. Don't want to be a dick. What do I do? |
t3_oycfd | AskReddit | Where is the line for acceptable sexual deviancy crossed? | I got this idea in my head when I was watching to catch a predator. I was watching a lot of these men being arrested, and I tended not to hate them or be disgusted by them (at least not most of them), but I felt bad for them.
The idea of a little girl or little boy is so sexually stimulating to them, they seem like they can't control it. I started thinking about mature men and women who live their whole lives in heterosexual relationships only for that to be wrecked by their repressed homosexual feelings. And I began to think, mustn't some of these men kind of feel that way?
We accept homosexuality as an alternate lifestyle or virtually non-deviant, more now than we ever have. But at some homosexuality was, if not it still is to some people, more repulsive than the behaviors of these men.
Is it because they are children that we vilify these men? Is there something truly 'wrong' with them, or could it be some sort of alternate 'mental wiring' that is the cause of the deviancy? And is prison really the healthiest thing to help these men? Can they be helped at all?
And just to clarify, I am not trying to compare homosexuals with pedophiles. I'm not trying to offend people. I am really trying to gain a better understanding of this and help spread that understanding.
I feel like a lot of people have been put in prison for feelings and desires they really don't have control over. And I'm just looking for input. | What can we do with grown men who want to kids? What's the real problem? How different is this from men who want to fuck men or women-women, or people who pursue 'deviant' relationships in different areas of life? |
t3_nrq0x | running | Any recommendations for "blocky" running shoes with thin soles? | I find most running shoes uncomfortable because they usually have a sharp taper towards the forefoot and thick soles. My forefoot is always cramped and I'm always buying a size bigger than I should. I need more "wiggle" room. I like a thin sole because it feels better running closer to the ground.
I recently tried Salomon XR Crossmax Neutral. They were more "blocky" than most but were too warm in the heat and the soles were kinda thick/dense (in fact they made a clunky noise when I walked). NOT interested in five-finger style shoes, just regular running shoes. Any suggestions? | Read title. |
t3_3qsbvk | relationships | Me [25 M] with [22F] Went out on some dates, now she's cancelling, twice. What to do. | ill be as short as possible.
Met this girl, went out on a couple dates, really interested in each other. After one date we had sex, we messaged back and forth for a week for our next date. The day of the date she cancelled and went out of town for 8 days, we didn't speak at this point. She messaged me again when she got back, started texting a lot . She set up a date for today, texted her to confirm and she cancelled again.
She sent me an excuse of her friends dinner, and asked what I was doing this weekend. I said I have no plans yet. *last txt
Obviously I'm going to not text her until she texts me right?, but wtf is going on. I'm being played.
Any advice? | Met a great girl, both really interested, went on some dates, had sex. Set up another date, she cancelled went away for some time. When she got back she messaged me for another date, again cancelled. Advice? |
t3_1ae8td | relationships | Confused on the difference of age because....Me: [22]F Him [35]M. | So I recently met an older gentleman and have been dating for 3 months. We have gone out several outings; restaurants, bars, out with friends. He has introduced me to his friends, and mine to him. He recently got his own place about 2 weeks ago where I have slept over. Its been great to spend time together with him at his place where we can to spend more intimate time together, however this tends to be only cuddling and watching movies. Whats more, a main problem of mine, is that he hasn't made any confirmation of labeling me as his girlfriend. I am afraid that I may be acting young and expecting such a childish way of labeling our relationship and that his actions are normal. Should I expect him to ask me to be his girlfriend anytime soon or even at all? | I don't know why the older guy im dating won't put a label on the relationship. |
t3_157uwi | relationships | At what point do you confront your partner when you think they're cheating?[22,23] | I'm 22, and my girlfriend is 23. The day after Christmas will be our third anniversary. I've suspected her of cheating over a year ago, but she denied it and I think I convinced myself it wasn't happening. Lately I've been suspecting something is going on. She's been out late, and acting...subtlety different with one of her male friends. I need some advice on how sure I should be before I break things off, and do I break up this close to Christmas? | How sure should I be she is cheating to break up? |
t3_2vg6z2 | relationships | Me [23 M] with my ___ [22 F] for one ear, she thinks I don't love her | We have been going out for about a year and things have mostly been pretty good. We have some disagreements about things but I think they are pretty normal. Anyways we started fighting more about some things, like we just see things differently I suppose.
She is saying that she wants to end the relationship because I don't really love her. This isn't a new thing I guess, she has been bringing it up for a while saying that I am not that affectionate to her. I try to be, tell her when she looks nice and stuff like that but I guess I am just not that comfortable with it.
I am trying to decide if I really do love her and I don't know how to feel. She said she wants to break up with me and that basically ruined about 3 days of my life. If I didn't really love her why would I be so sad? I am trying to really critically think if I love her or not and I don't really know how to determine this because maybe it isn't so logical. | I can't decide if I really love my girlfriend or not, I feel like I do but she doesn't. |
t3_jgix6 | AskReddit | Stumbled upon r/jailbait, opened some pics, freaked out when realized what I was looking at. Now what? | I've read here before that r/jailbait is "perfectly legal" because the girls are clothed (technically). I don't wish to turn this into a morality debate. I'm pretty sure you can guess my stance (shit is fucking creepy), so I won't make this about that.
My problem is: now I'm freaking out. I'm terrified that I put myself in a horrible situation just by browsing that god damned subreddit. For the record, I live in Canada, and it seems that the laws regarding that subject matter here are the same as the US' -- if there's not genitals, no sexual acts, it's nor pornography.
That does nothing to help me relax. In my mind's eye I'm already in some watchdog database and the cops will bust down my door and take me in for child pornography.
Yeah, I know, sounds like the worst case scenario. But that's how my mind works, and child porn is not the kind of thing I wanna be involved with, even if I'm protected by the apparent umbrella of technicality.
Yes, this is a throwaway account. I wouldn't dare admitting I've actually browsed that subreddit. | Browsed r/jailbait, opened a few pictures, realized the girls were obviously underaged and the entirety of the subreddit was dedicated to that type of content, should I go ahead and kill myself now and avoid getting arrested and disgraced? |
t3_f8za6 | self | Can you please help me feel better about or stop my father from being treated with chelation for high cholesterol? | Reddit, I've always been an open minded person when it comes to religion and alternative medicine. My mom believes in Silvia Brown and stuff like that, and I stopped trying to prove that she's a fraud because it gives my mom peace of mind. My mom also thinks she is a bit psychic.
However, my father and I both have genetically high cholesterol. I know diet is important and we've tried, but it's just not enough to get us into "normal" range for LDL alone. He used to take Lipitor I think, and I take Vytorin. They were both effective in lowering our cholesterol.
My dad didn't like some of the side effects of Lipitor and my mom suggested some alternative medicines, red rice yeast I think and maybe something else. Doesn't really matter because, surprise, his LDL levels were high again. So they went to a doctor (Dr. Joya Schoen, "Complementary and Alternative Medicine True Healthcare"). She explains that it's not high cholestrol but lipoproteins that cause heart disease. Is this true?
She also mentions that chelation therapy may help, and once they get the blood results (they drew 7 vials of blood) he may be a candidate. I told my mom that he'll probably be a candidate for anything that involves giving them money.
I read them a bit off the Wikipedia article on chelation saying that a number of very important organizations agree there is no evidence to show chelation is helpful (at least in regard to heart disease) and some evidence in causing damage/killing people. My mom's counter point was "Of course they say it doesn't work, because they're greedy and want you coming back for perscriptions and heart bypasses." And then gave an anecdotal (hooray) story about how chelation helped some miners with angina.
I don't trust chelation, I don't trust this doctor, and my parents are certain that this is the answer. My mom and I both just want the best for my dad, but we completely disagree on chelation. | My dad is getting chelation therapy to reduce risk of heart disease. I am against it and my logic has failed against my parents, help me change their mind or help me change mine, please. |
t3_30rhy3 | relationships | My wife suggested I get a girlfriend and I need advice... | My wife [27F] and I [27M] have been married for 5 years.
Since my wife had our youngest son (almost 4 years ago) her sex drive has almost vanished. Now, she's a good wife and we do have sex pretty regularly, but I'm always the one to initiate it and that just makes it feel like it's a chore for her - which is no fun for me. We've gone back and forth about her lack of libido for the last year pretty badly. I want her to be more active in our sex life, she doesn't think she can do that. It's put a pretty severe strain on our marriage. Well, tonight was the mother lode of all fights. We're getting into it - I tell her that I *need* this from her and that if she can't give it to me, that I'm not sure where it would leave us. To my surprise, she calmly told me that I should get a girlfriend. Someone who can fill that void so that she's not burdened with it. I'd be lying if I hadn't thought about being with other women who could match up with me in bed, but to hear it come from my wife made it seem...strange. Has anyone been in this situation before? Even if you haven't, I'd appreciate some kind of advice on it. | Wife with low libido says I should get a girlfriend to fulfill my sexual needs, I'm confused as what to do. |
t3_1njljm | relationship_advice | [18/f] Single, but looking for advice for if I do start dating someone: When is the right time to tell someone you're dating about serious baggage (i.e. bipolar disorder)? | Mine is that I have bipolar disorder. I'm doing very well, and my meds are keeping me balanced but I feel like if I were to get into a serious relationship at any point (I've never really been in one) I'd have to tell him sometime.
I just don't know how I'm supposed to handle it. I wouldn't want to get into emotional baggage too quickly, but I wouldn't want to have to tell him later and have him be upset that I hadn't told him.
I'm not actively looking for a relationship right now, but I feel like I'm in a good place to have one if I do meet the right guy, and I'd like to be ready to deal with this stuff. Any advice? | I have bipolar disorder and don't know when I'd talk about it in a new relationship. |
t3_3bgf8r | personalfinance | I financially support my Father, who is afraid of getting a real job because he owes a significant sum to the IRS, and believes they will seize his earnings or put him in jail. Are there any resources we can take advantage of to ease his mind? More details inside. | Hi /r/personalfinance,
To make a long, long story very concise:
A) Dad lost a lot of money during the collapse of 2008-ish, made worse by an expensive medical condition at the time.
B) Lost his job in 2010.
C) Has not been employed since, because he has chronic problems with his back (denied disability, twice) and because he wracked up a significant bunch of taxes he has yet to pay to the IRS.
D) Because of C), he is irrationally afraid to draw a paycheck or open a bank account.
He successfully filed for bankruptcy a couple years back. Most of his debts were erased, even taxes, but several more claims were made by the IRS after the bankruptcy settled, so he can't simply get rid of them.
I was unable to get an accurate number out of him, but what he owes the IRS is in the neighborhood of $5,000 to $20,000.
---
I am currently paying for his housing and groceries. I'm happy to help him out and am grateful that I have a decent enough job to be able to do it... but it is becoming an increasingly large strain on me and my finances. I don't think this is sustainable long-term.
I straight up asked him if he was looking for work anytime soon, because **anything** would help. Part-time, minimum wage, whatever. He responded that it would have to be low-skill, and he'd have to be paid under the table to avoid the taxman.
I love the guy but that's not acceptable. | Dad owes a bunch of money to the IRS, fears legal retribution. No other source of income or aid is available to my knowledge. What are some good tools or programs for tax "forgiveness" we can look into? |
t3_2s1kh4 | relationships | Me [16 M] advice on girl just stopped talking to me. | So I kissed this girl at a party and got her number, im 16 btw. Then we have been texting and talking with eachother and chilled another time and we have became like pretty close and it seemed like she liked me and we would talk a lot and have interesting conversations and she seemed really interested. Then about 2 days ago she just stopped replying and has not send me a text back even though I know she has seen the texts. What should I do? Why is she doing this? I do not think I did anything wrong. | Girl I like stopped texting me out of nowhere. What should I do? |
t3_1iiyhu | relationships | I [21M] am going on a first date with [20F], who wants to do "something crazy." I'm clueless | I've met a girl through an online dating site, and we're supposed to go on a first date next week. After I asked her to give me a day or two to think of a date, she said "Ok, you should think of something crazy to do."
First, let me say that I don't think it means she wants to have sex, but wants to do something thrilling. I'm not looking to break any major laws. At the same time, I wouldn't be opposed to swimming in a neighborhood pool after hours (which is something I used to do with friends in high school and I thought was pretty fun). But I feel like this might be a little childish and that there might be a better solution. | Girl asks me to come up with a thrilling date, I don't know what to do. |
t3_4ljf5t | relationship_advice | Me, a 17M, going to a Gay Pride Parade with Ex-Girlfriend, 17F, as Friends. | I never had the Best Relationship with my Ex-Girlfriend, but That probably why we're Not Dating. It's been 2 years since we Dated, and after a Year of not talking to each other we talked it out, Really fleshed out what was wrong with that relationship, got Closure, etc. Woohoo Now we're friends again. We never kept up any Regular Contact, but It was cool to be able to drop her a line every now and then, and vice versa. We've visited each other a couple of times (twice) since, just as friends.
Today, she randomly texted me and invited me out to a Local Gay Pride Rally she's going to because all her friends bailed on her for that day (She and I have both had a flimsy history of our sexualities). I have for the past year, had a Girlfriend who is very caring and communicative, and she recognizes that my Ex is just a friend, and that she got pulled into home school about a year ago so it's hard for her to keep in touch with friends and everything, so we're cool there; But I'm having trouble thinking about what to even say to a Girl I used to date when I've exhausted all the talk we can about our previous relationship, and I haven't hung out with her recently, So I don't have the friendly rapport I would with somebody else. | How do you hang with an Ex as a Friend without being Weird. |
t3_4rutuf | Parenting | My 2nd grader got into a great charter school but she loves her public school. Insight would be awesome | She is a great student, high honor roll the whole year, straight A's. But my husband and I don't feel she's getting challenged enough. She whizzes through everything. The problem is she has really bad anxiety. She used to be in a charter school but they treated her badly so we switched her schools. It took her a while to get used to the school but now she goes willingly and loves it. The education at the charter school is so much better, she'd have so many more opportunities to learn and grow. She says she refuses to go to the new school, which her little brother will be at too. I'm torn between keeping her happy and giving her a better education. What would you guys do? | Daughter got in new school but she loves her old school. |
t3_ms6f7 | AskReddit | I just got my dream job offer, what the hell now? | There's a decent amount of back story to this.
I worked as an intern systems analyst this past summer at an insurance company (AKA I intensely disliked it there). A few weeks after the summer I was notified of a job offer. I was given until November 7th to look around at other places and come up with an offer.
None of the types of companies I was seeking out (small to mid-sized tech companies) were hiring college kids who don't graduate until May. So I evaluated what I needed to finish up and school and found that I only needed one class next semester so I decided to advertise that in my interviews. So as long as they would be flexible I /could/ start working earlier in the Spring.
Well I hadn't totally thought this through because I blinded by my dislike of huge-corporate-tie-wearing-insurance company. Now I actually found an awesome company (jeans wearing, cool environment, interesting working, good perks, fair pay, etc.) but I could not talk them into moving start-date from January to May (which seems fair and very reasonable of them). Though they will let me leave work early some times to drive the 45 minutes up to school and take this class once a week.
However now that the offer sits in front of me I'm terrified of leaving college before all of my friends do. | College senior got awesome early job offer, but need to start in January. |
t3_36ti8b | tifu | TIFU by being Senator Marco Rubio | I'm taking a foreign policy course in which a huge part of our mark depends on a Mock Senate. Upon getting this assignment I rather ambitiously agreed to be Marco Rubio, the outspoken presidential candidate. The professor told me Rubio was one of the most opinionated Senators who pretty much liked to hear himself talk. Taking that to heart I started prepping, our question, "Use of military force against ISIL", in which Rubio stood for no restrictions. Everything was going great, I was dissing President Obama and John Kerry and my grade was looking good. Three students were assigned to be witnesses to present their arguments, and this girl I went to middle school came up and presented her notion. What you should know about this girl is that she's a bully and I've hated her since middle school. Being overly amped up and having her ideals contrast with everything Rubio stand for I went full-blown attack mode. I started off by asking her what her main goal was and argued that it should be to take down ISIS with all means possible. At this point her arguments were just off but I didn't think about it and continued attacking her. Suddenly my professor speaks and says, "you know she's a UN representative", that when everything clicked, no wonder she kept saying I want to assure the safety of people! I have never felt so stupid in my whole life…At this point she looked like she was going to cry and left the room right after. | Marco Rubio for a day, attacked a UN representative without knowing it |
t3_16gvns | relationship_advice | I [27/f] need advice on my friend [29/m] | I met a friend who is a guy (I'm a chick) when I moved to my current city through school. We hit it off and went drinking/ hung out a few times. Mutual admitted attraction, but I sensed that he was hung up on someone. Fast forward 9 months, I'm dating someone else ('twas casual, he didn't know) and we're hanging out (in a group), then go to my house, he tries to kiss me. I reject, it's weird for awhile, we get over it. Turns out, my woman sense was right: he was 'on a break' with someone (f) when the flirting occurred. The gf is naturally not really into the idea of me, can't say I blame her. So, I meet the gf through him, and we hit it off and she approves of me - I always get along better with girls, didn't kiss this guy because I suspected there was a woman, would never break the sister code of honor. So, he and I don't ever push boundaries of any kind (we did go out in a group once when she was ill). The thing is, there are things that she doesn't do or like that he and I both do- fantasy football, trivia, skiing. Plus, she's really smart and driven and he and I are grad-school-drinking types, so it's sometimes easier for me to shoot the shit with him. Fast forward and I break up with said guy. Now she doesn't seem to approve of us playing video games, going out with school friends in groups etc. And it seemed to occur right when I got single as far as I can tell, we only hang out about 2x/month | do I have to, by default, back off from my friendship with him as a woman-honor thing or is this her jealousy deal? Does my relationship, or lack thereof, dictate my friendship with him? How do you handle it when you were friends with the opposite gender first? |
t3_um4dz | AskReddit | Curious to know: who actually likes Israel? | I wish I didn't have to open with a disclaimer, but this being Reddit I feel it is necessary to point out that this question is not intended to be racist, hateful or anti-Semitic.
That said, I am curious to know if anyone actually has positive feelings about Israel? I ask because it seems that every week reveals a new human rights violation committed by the government and its subsidiaries, or some form of brutal violence or terrorism committed by unchecked religious zealots.
I understand that the US has a positive relationship with Israel due to trade and the strategic importance of having an ally located within the chaotic hotbed that makes up the Middle East, and that many of us perhaps still feel that Israel and Jewish people in general should be immune to criticism after the events of the previous century.
However, I find it disgusting and appalling to read about the bullshit this country pulls on a consistent basis, and how the rest of the world just kind of shrugs and looks the other way.
Eyes are glued to Muslim nations and Iran is treated as a wretched hive of scum and villainy because some people believe they might be making a nuclear weapon (what makes them more likely to actually use one than other "hostile" nations like Russia and China eludes me, given the obvious consequences of such a reckless action). Sharia law has certainly generated its share of injustices, but this doesn't stop western nations from maintaining friendly relations with other Islamic Law nations like Oman, Qatar and the UAE.
Furthermore, I believe if any nation offers the potential threat of nuclear action, it is Israel. A "pre-emptive" nuking of supposed grave threats just doesn't strike me as something out of their league.
So I have to ask - does anyone actually feel good about Israel? Why do you think they get away with what they do? Are people just afraid to talk about what some may consider to be a "taboo" subject? | I would like to know if anyone has positive feelings about Israel despite the human rights violations and threats of regional destabilization they are responsible for? |
t3_3fjxgk | relationships | [25F] with my ex [26M] abandoned me. Not over it yet. | Hi guys! I.. hope this is an okay place to ask this?
So about a month ago, my boyfriend of one month vanished on me. Even though it was a short relationship, it took a toll on me. I think I had found something I considered so incredibly.. special I guess. I was magnetized to him like I've never been to anyone else in my entire life. Personality wise we felt so compatible, physically, and just well.. everything. He was making promises of an awesome future and he seemed to really.. love me. It was strange to fall for someone so fast, and I feel so idiotic doing so..
Well I think I've kind of repaired, but I almost feel like I've changed. I've been trying to return to the person I was before we dated, the happy, peppy person everyone loved.. but I've been very cold. I've been very withdrawn and I've found it hard to be close to anyone anymore. I've attempted to go out, hang out with friends, but everytime I do I get really.. sad.. and withdraw again.
I've attempted to move on, I've attempted to date other people, but I think subconsciously I push everyone away without meaning to. I've been sitting alone in my room playing video games for a week straight trying to get my mind off of things at the moment since nothing else seems to really help.
It really bothers me, because I do feel very very cold. I'm normally a very warm, open person who just.. enjoys everyone around me.. but I can't feel that right now.
I don't know if this is normal.. or if it's because I suffer from depression normally? I'm just curious if this has happened to anyone else and how long did it take you to get over it? I really want to move on, but I'm still painfully broken it seems. | Boyfriend broke my heart, abandoned me, and I'm uncertain of how to feel normal again. |
t3_2x8iwl | personalfinance | Investing $500K into Commercial Real Estate, Advice Appreciated | My parents are downsizing and just sold their house for $1.2Million. They will be buying a condo for around $300k and are looking to invest in commercial real estate. They are looking to use $500K as a downpayment for the purchase. My brothers and I will be responsible for finding the property and managing it.
Ideally, we would like to use the income generated to pay for the building itself, parents living expenses (taxes, food, utilities), and put whatever is left over into a joint business savings account which we will use towards future investments.
It is my understanding after speaking with my Mortgage Broker that as long as the property can pay for itself, we should not have a problem getting a mortgage. He said we would be eligible for a mortgage as long as we have 25% down. ~ $2Million Property
Since I am new to this, could anyone shed some light and throw me some advice on how to begin looking for these types of properties, what do the mortgages look like, and also help me understand what is a good deal vs a bad one, and what red flags to look out for.
For Example: This looks too good to be true:
This is the beginning of a new journey and I hope to learn as much about it and be prepared for it as well as I can be before I commit to such a large investment. | Looking to invest $500K into commercial property, need advise. |
t3_3ttjir | relationships | Me [25F] with went on date with [30M]. Will I hear from him? | Went through a break up about a month ago and have just started dating again. Went on a first date on Friday with a guy I met online after having texted for a few weeks. I thought it went well but I haven't heard from him yet. It hasn't even been two full days yet so I guess I'm not too worried yet but I've been out of the game for a while and don't know what to expect.
During the date he mentioned multiple times things we would do on our next date. And we already had another date set up for a few weeks from now that we had planned before the first one so it's possible I'll see him again or it's also possible that he'll cancel. For some reason at the end of the date I got the vibe he wasn't that into it but who knows. I could be wrong but, should I expect to hear from him anytime soon if he likes me?
If it doesn't work out it's not a big deal but it would be nice to know what to expect. | recently started dating again. will he reach out to me? |
t3_3bohha | tifu | TIFU by getting my haircut by a Russian lady | My hair was getting quite long and too long to gel how I like it so I decided to get my locks cut. I go into Fantastic Sam's (probably my first fuck up) to get my hair trimmed so I can go back to looking funky fresh. I go in to be greeted by a Russian lady with the hair of a 14 year old girl who has daddy issues and loves dubstep. This lady was straight up, "carry log on her shoulder", vodka drinking, Russian lady. Picture the stereotype, but with hair that screams she doesn't know how to make decent decisions. After waiting for her to clean up her station, I sit down in the leathery throne where I am cloaked.
Now I have pretty short hair, and have gone in there many times, and it normally takes about 15-20 minutes to trim it back to the length I like it. This Russian lady takes about an hour to cut my hair. Now I would have no problem with that if the haircut was decent... but the back looked like someone gave her those scissors that make designs out of the edge of the paper. She removed hair from the sides but not the top, causing me to now look like macklemore, if macklemore had now a botched back and uneven sideburns. | middle aged russian lady tortured my hair like I was in Guantanamo, now I look like a white rapper who raps about being poor |
t3_39qqw0 | tifu | TIFU by eating expired mozzarella cheese | So a couple weeks ago me and my friend decided to start training for a marathon. We found a plan online so that we could both train "together" (we live in different states so we aren't actually running together). Well last night me and my boyfriend were making dinner and I opened a recently bought package of mozzarella cheese. I looked at the bottom and it said it expired 10 days ago but I had just bought it so I used it anyways. It tasted fine so I figured all was well. I realized how wrong I was when I went out for a 5 mile run this morning. I woke up somewhat early to try to get out before it got too hot and I told my boyfriend he could stay and sleep and that I would be home in about 40 minutes. I wasn't feeling great but I wanted to stick to our plan so I went out anyway. Then began the worst run of my life. I was about 2 miles in when my stomach started to feel pretty bad. At about 2.5 miles I knew I had to find a bathroom and I had to find one soon. I was about a mile from a park that I knew had a bathroom and I decided to make a run for it. At this point I was already prairie dogging and I just hoped I could make it... I didn't. When I finally made it to the bathroom I was just hoping there wasn't any on my shorts... There was. I cleaned myself and my shorts the best I could and began my walk of shame home. When I walked in the door he asked me how my run was and I just said "ok but I'm gunna shower real quick!" I just threw out my shorts and took a much needed shower. | I ate expired mozzarella cheese and pooped my pants. |
t3_pkdpt | relationships | Anger issues.... | Edit for my not reading directions... So my SO and I 26f, 32m, 3 years in, and live together, we are quite serious, bought our home together, and are dedicated to each other, thing is we are both pretty volatile people, and get defensive and don't communicate well.
I say something bothers me, he doesn't see it as an issue, I steam and don't say anything, he asks 'why I'm being a twat' and I blow up. It's tough. I love him forever, and will do anything to help myself get better. But every time I cool off and talk to him about how I feel, he tells me that I'm just trying to blame him for things rather than take the blame, which I do. I'm not sure how to communicate better with him to explain why I'm hurt and still apologize for my shitty behavior too.
I tend not to see that I'm bottling things up and not being honest, and when I do, he gets defensive and offensive toward me, and I then react negatively, which does no good to help resolve the situation. Has anyone been through this type of thing? What kind of things did you do? | Possible need for counselor intervention for consistent communication failure. |
t3_2v5nt7 | relationships | Girlfriend [25F] wants me [34M] to "put a ring on it," but won't talk finances | Hi reddit,
Been with my girl for 7 years. Ups and downs like any relationship, but we get along well. Lately we have been talking lightly about marriage, kids, what we want in the future. Im ready to sell the condo that I've worked hard to pay a lot off and build a house outside the city.
Girlfriend has liv d with me the last two years almost. Before that she was living at home and working, she's a manager of a bar and does well. I have some concerns.
One is that she hasn't been financially open with me and doesn't have any savings, but we want three kids, I just don't know how realistic it will be. Secondly... I feel like I barely see her. She has her yearly girlfriend only trips to coachella and all over. She's into the gay clubbing scene which crosses me out. She works shitty hours, or sometimes she's hungover... Or she's off doing something that excludes me. (A last minute trip with girlfriends to Las Vegas.)
She's supportive of me building a house, but she says she would stay in the city and see me on occasion until it's ready. Her grandparents own a lot of property and she is depending on inheriting it. Is there any hope of is meeting in the middle? | girlfriend wants to get married. Doesnt feel like the marriage I want. |
t3_42yq73 | tifu | TIFU by getting fired | Throwaway for obvious reasons. This happened today. I was in a severe high speed car accident months ago. I was off from work for 3 months to recover. During that time I interviewed and was promoted to a new position. When I started the new job, it was hard. Mornings were severely painful, and I was frequently late. My boss started to harass me about this, and I followed her request to call her if I was having a rough morning and would be late. I was on alot of medication, and when my boss found out I was taking opiates, she forced me to email our security office stating that I was taking drugs. I had a very hard time working and was forced to take multiple days off. She also caught me dozing at my desk one day and sent me a nasty email. She started harassing me about every little thing, but I didn't think she was planning on firing me. I knew my condition wouldn't improve without spine surgery, so I had surgery as soon as possible to fix my situation. My first day back 8 weeks after my spine surgery, she met me at the door and fired me. This was a federal job, since my 2 year probationary period was not complete, they are saying I have no appeal rights. Reddit, TIFU by being a crappy employee. | Never trust a boss with too many details about your disability. |
t3_3io5tg | Cooking | Need help with a new diet | Hey /r/Cooking. I recently read something (at the top of /r/news) that made me want to stop eating most meats. Right now I'm thinking I'd like to only eat eggs and fish. The problem is that I used to cook A LOT of meat, and I can't afford fish (college). So I'm not terribly sure what I should cook now. I work out almost every day, so I need a pretty good source of protein, and don't like to go super heavy on carbs. I was thinking that I'd like to get into some Indian cuisine (I think most of their stuff is vegetarian), but when I searched it I had no clue what was beginner stuff or what most of it was. So basically I was wondering if you guys could give me some tips for some cheap Indian cooking or some cheap vegetarian cooking (+ eggs). Thanks guys! | Need beginning Indian/ vegetarian recipes |
t3_44fmof | tifu | TIFU by helping a stranger chase his running dog | This happened earlier today, I was driving to my girlfriends house when a couple blocks away from her house I see a guy looking very tired chasing his dog down the road. He seemed like a nice guy and I could see the guys family down the road watching him run so I pull over and start off the conversation by saying "hey, this might be weird since I'm a stranger but do you need a ride and I'll help you get the dog" (probably shouldn't pick strangers up off the side of the road in the future) he agrees and he gets in the car. After pulling over, chasing this giant dog (husky who can run very fast) getting back in the car and pulling over a few times, the dog was right next to my car. So me (being the dumbass I am) put the car in park when I'm going about five miles per hour because I wanted to get that dog asap and wasn't thinking. the car then jolts and I don't think much of it.
We keep running for maybe about half a mile before we finally catch this dog, he says thanks and I go back to my car. I start it up and the engine sounds like it's jolting, didn't think much of it and went to my girlfriends, when I leave my girlfriends house the car does this again but even harder. I decide to look at the motor mounts and one of them is completely cracked, I dont know if it was a coincidence that I noticed after this but now I'm out a couple hundred dollars for being a nice person:( (I don't think this was the sole reason it cracked but I'm sure this was the final blow) | helped guy get loose dog, broke part in my car because im stupid |
t3_4fspsf | relationships | My First ever girlfriend of 2 months already doesn't love me | Today is our 2 month anniversary, my girlfriend decided to tell me that she is no longer in love with me. She said half of her still loves me and wants us to work but the other half is not in love with me anymore. This completely blindsided me and now I have no idea what to do because its such a confusing place I'm in right now.
She lives 3 hours away from me, we've only been going out for 2 months, and I've known her since new years. We met online, and I've seen her 3 times during those 2 months, multiple days on those 2 occasions I stayed with her. I'm pretty sure she has depression, and she also has the rod in her arm so her hormones are changing dramatically and she even told me that. She said she doesn't have a reason why she stopped loving me and she's just as confused as I am. When we were talking about if it was the end of our relationship she said "I guess so" and didn't even bother to fight for us and try to work it out.
I'm going to go see her next weekend to try and sort things out and hopefully win her back since I love her with all my heart. She's 17, I'm 18 and I think the main reason she doesn't love me anymore is because we barely see each other, we've never talked on the phone or through skype, only through text. | 2 months in a relationship, girlfriend doesn't love me anymore. Doesn't have a reason why, she didn't bother to try and work it out but she's sad about the whole thing. |
t3_2w5bzx | legaladvice | Can someone who is in a Psych Ward be served police report papers? | Edit: We are in Wisconsin
My brother's sister left her husband with her 15m old baby.
He beat her, held a knife to her in front of baby, and jerked baby's arm almost out of the socket.
They are in a shelter in an undisclosed location far away.
Found out that HE is in the hospital Psych Ward. He either checked himself in or hurt himself for attention (he told us he was hurt, totaled the car then drove by, emotional manipulation).
Papers were filed for several recent beatings and a restraining order. My Question: Will the sheriffs department be able to serve him papers in the hospitals behavioral unit or will they not allow it because it could upset him?
He has committed a crime, does that mean they have to let him be served? | Can legal papers regarding restraining order and battery be served in a hospitals behavioral unit? |
t3_1ct36t | relationships | So I[25m] found out my gf[19] is bipolar, need advice on how to deal with it(no break up advice because I love her). | Basically, I am looking for advice to help me deal with her bipolarism. She takes her Meds and such but sometimes I can tell when things are bit off.
I have been with her for almost 7 months now and I absolutely love her. I have communicated my feelings with her over problems we have had, and I try not to push things. She has opened up to me to an extent, but sometimes she still distances herself from me. One example is that when she has a problem she won't talk about it.
I am wondering if that is just an age thing or the bipolar thing? She would rather not talk about shit sometimes and I respect that and will not push it. | Basically my gf is bipolar, looking for advice on how to handle some things. |
t3_3gjgwq | tifu | TIFU by not trying to be a white knight in tram | Mandator - this happened lesser than 1 hour ago. It was 8.40am GST+8 and I'm commuting to work as usual. I just gotten into the train which was quite spacious compared to usual as it's already past rush hour. When train departs, I noticed that the guy(looks 27) beside me was grinding and pushing his groin against the buttocks of a girl (looks 22). The guy is literally pushing his hips forward! Soon enough, his expression changed into that of someone jizzing! Here's the fuck up - the girl was ignorant of the situation while I was pondering on the action to be taken. Few days ago in reddit, I read a TIFU about white knights fucking up and I decided not to do the same mistake. I bluffed myself into believe that they might be couples.
However, I was soon proven wrong. Upon reaching the next station, the girl immediately moved away from the guy and he exited the door, only to enter the next cabin of the same train! | Saw a pervert next to me in train and I did nothing |
t3_2ln09p | relationships | Me [27 M/F] with my ex [27 F] - texted her after a week. Please convince me this wasn't a bad idea... | I [posted] earlier in the week about getting blindsided by a breakup last weekend by a girl that I was in love with. She had lots of baggage and I think that if she didn't things would still be going great.
All week I've been unable to eat, barely drink water, I wake up at 4 am thinking about her and just lay there until I get up for work, where I am useless (I work from home, so I'm suck by myself 10 feet from where all my memories of her are). All my friends work Friday/weekend hospitality schedules, so tonight I'm stuck by myself and stir crazy.
All week I've been running through our relationship in my mind and I'm starting to make sense of it, though whatever I feel about her is pure conjecture. For myself, I realized I was really insecure about my place in her life as she grieved a deceased SO from less than a year earlier and this prevented me from fully supporting her due to me avoiding the topic near the end, when I really should have been acknowledging it. I finally broke down and texted her my feelings and told her why I acted how I did and how I think it affected us and that regretted it. I did not say sorry again and I did not ask for forgiveness or any response, only that it was my fault and I need to say it.
Maybe I just needed some closure in telling her what I didn't have the wherewithal to tell her the night she ended it. I can't tell if I feel a weight lifted or if it's just stupid false hope like she might text me back. I don't know. It needed to be said, IMO. At this point unless she responds telling me she wants to get back together, I won't be contacting her again. | After a week agony I texted my ex some things I felt I needed to say to gain some closure. Not sure if it was a good move. |
t3_31w72a | tifu | Tifu by running to work. | A few weeks ago, I was playing basketball, I was wearing the shoes derrick rose advertised (maybe they are cursed). While playing, I began to have agonizing pain near my shins. I self diagnosed myself with shin splints. I laid off my legs for two weeks and didn't do any real workouts that involved my legs.
Two weeks later, today, it is raining hard and I just parked in a parking garage. Feeling good and not really in pain, I decided to run full sprint to my office building.
Mid way through my sprint I stop suddenly because that agonizing pain has returned. I limp slowly in pain to my office building and get drenched by rain to start my morning.
Hope you all had a better morning. | played basketball got injured, thought I was healthy two weeks later took a sprint and injury flared up again. |
t3_3isvcp | tifu | TIFU By Putting a Brainlicker Up My Ass | Alright, for those of you who don't know what a brainlicker is, [click this link.] It's pretty important that you know what this thing is, else you won't understand this at all.
Basically, a brainlicker is a rollerball which you lick. Then, it produces a sour liquid which is damn sour.
So, I bought one of these for £1 in a local discount store. Got home, got frisky.
I started by putting the whole thing up by ass - the lid included. Feels pretty good. I pull it out, and go for some more. Only this time, the lid had popped off and I didn't notice...
When I stuck it up my ass, the sour liquid stung like the queen of all hornets. *Holy fuck!* I squeezed the bottle in shock, and this made the end of the rollerball pop out, straight up my ass... followed by half a bottle of this sour liquid.
I scream like God knows what, and shortly hear footsteps coming up the stairs. I'm in absolute agony, and I've still got a ball up my ass. I try pulling up my trousers but alas.. no time. My door opens, and my mother sees me. I'm lying on the floor, squirming like nuts, my asshole stinging, and a brainlicker on the floor.
My mother screamed, covered her eyes, and ran back downstairs. I haven't spoken to her since. What should I do? I'm pretty sure she knows what happened.. | Put a sour rollerball candy up my ass. The lid come off, and I reinserted. Stung like fuck, squeezed the bottle in shock. Rollerball popped up my ass, so did half a bottle of sour shit. I screamed, mother saw me lying on the floor squirming and screaming. Haven't spoken since. |
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