id
stringlengths 8
9
| subreddit
stringclasses 29
values | title
stringlengths 1
300
| post
stringlengths 1
2.51k
| summary
stringlengths 0
1.79k
|
|---|---|---|---|---|
t3_4sk5bp | relationships | Stopping loneliness? 21yo F | I'm lonely.
Being an introvert I enjoy close relationships with 1 or 2 people. One is currently too ill to feed my neediness. The other I lost in a pseudo-breakup with 22yo male after a year. I feel like I have don't have an outlet for all these things I'd normally share with these kinds of people. The kind of things your other, (still as valued), friends or family wouldn't really be interested in. The kind of crap you just spew at your partner.
I have plenty of friends but I'm struggling to not feel alone. This is also on top of getting over someone. I just feel emotionally muted and end up crying every night.
How can I make it easier? | Lonely after break-up causing loss of close friendship. Feel like I have no one to talk to. Looking for advice. |
t3_2iny75 | relationships | Me [30M] with my gf [29 F] 10 months, she got a weird facetime request from an unknown number late last night, then a text from that number that said "fuck grimrigger" | Title says it all, and i'm just a little weirded out by it. My mind immediately went to a possible ex, however when we looked up the phone number it was listed as a fake identity. I'm creeped out bc he knew my name...at first we thought it was just some spam or identity thief scam, but then the text message with "fuck grimrigger" came and i got a little spooked. What do you guys make of this? My gf was just as surprised as I was, so I honestly don't think she has any idea who it could be. She thought it could have been one of my roommates screwing with us, but none of them or any opf my friends have her number. | GF got weird facetime request late last night followed by a text saying 'fuck grimrigger'. Googled number and it was listed as a fake identity number. I'm a little spooked by it and not sure what to make out of it. |
t3_wizq3 | AskReddit | What is the best story a family member has told you? | My cousin told me this one. So my cousin grew up in the ghetto area of So cal. ( not like terribly ghetto but crazy shit has happened ) One day she is walking home from school, she has her 2 younger cousins that she picked up. She was probably in 9th grade. She was friends with this 19 year-old guy who all she did was talk to. So while walking home, this 17-18 year old girl, who is just the epitome of ghetto of " ghetto bitch." she walks up to my cousin asking her why the hell she was talking to her boyfriend. she started calling her a whore an that she was cheating with her boyfriend. She starts shoving my cousin, but my cousin ignores her until she takes a swing at my cousin. My cousin says she just lost it, and proceeded to beat the shit out of this girl. She threw the girl into some barbed wire and just beat the crap out of her. keep in mind my cousin is like 13, and this girl is out of highschool. So the girl is done, crying on the floor and my cousin walks home. Later the girl shows up, with her mom. Her mom is frantic, yelling infront of their house and making threats; saying that she is going to press charges and that my cousin is going to jail. all the while, the girl was making faces at my cousin.My cousin's sister had just gotten home from work and lost it as soon as she saw the girl. My cosuin knew her sister would kill for her so she had to go stop her. Some of the neighbors had heard the commotion. One of them was telling the lady to shut up and that he saw the whole thing; that the girl had thrown the first punch. They left and she never saw them again. | My cousin beat the shit out of some girl 5 years older than her, and totally got away with it |
t3_2m45pb | relationships | Me [34 M] newly single after 10 years | I've just divorced my ex-wife. We were together for 10 years. Before that, I dated my high school girlfriend for 7 years. Lots of sex was had, but with the same two people.
So here I am, 34 years old, successful, but absolutely lost in terms of single life expectations and experiences.
Another big relationship is not what I want right now . I look forward to being single, with a more casual attitude toward dating and sex, but how do I ease back into this? Does anyone here have a similar story?
I feel like I know a few ladies from my past that will be thrilled that I'm single, but because our relationship was strictly platonic before I'm not sure how to shift things up with them.
What's the latest in meeting women? Tinder? OkCupid? something else?
Now that I'm single, most of my friends are committed and are not as useful to me in this department. | Only two long term relationships under my belt over 17 years. Slightly intimidated at single life. Tips? pointers? |
t3_d05jq | self | Apple genius ftw | So I'm sitting in my car in front of my local Apple store right now, where I dropped off a piece of equipment for repairs. The nice man behind the genius bar told me I might want to update the registration info on my machine because it contained "some interesting things." I thought for a moment before remembering how I angrily edited my Apple account info two weeks ago while being forced to register an iPod Shuffle before I could use it. I changed my name to Mr. Ass Hole, my address to Cockandballs lane, etc.
I apologized, asked if I could go ahead and change it right then. "Can I show it to him first?" he asks, gesturing to another of the genius bar staff. "Sure," I told him.
So then I change it, tell him I'm done, and he says "I took a screenshot."
"Oh, man," I said, "I'm going to be on reddit later, aren't I?"
He didn't hesitate a second before saying "and on digg three days later." | Apple store employee likes being verbally abused, dislikes mrbabyman |
t3_11k646 | AskReddit | I am a senior in high school, I am both excited and terrified about the world, and no one is being very helpful - Reddit, what advice can you give me about college, work, and life? | I love learning. I literally have an interest in everything and have yet to do anything that I haven't enjoyed, which makes choosing a major or a school exceedingly difficult. Plus, I am especially shitty in math - though I think it is interesting - and, though I adore science, it often involves math as well (conceptual or math-less science topics are breezy, but everything always ends up in an equation). Needless to say, math being so important in everything is troublesome for me. I'm decently skilled in art and writing. I have no idea what I should do or where I should go. I could potentially be happy in *any* job in *any* field, if, for nothing else, I only stay there to save up some money so that I can move on to something different. I don't know what to look out for, what would be the most beneficial, or... anything like that. All I know are things that should go in /r/protips or /r/frugal, nothing substantial like life advice or what happens after college.
Advise me! You all have *something*, I guarantee it. Maybe tell me about your schooling or pursuits (were/are they worth it?), your jobs, your taxes and rent, your mortgage and bills (like how you deal with them, or if they are even a problem for you, that kind of thing). I will take any advice you give me. Anything. Give me your best shot.
**Disclaimer:** I have exhausted my other sources - parents, siblings, etc - and I am still lacking. They helped with quite a few things, but since their specific situations are/were so vastly different from mine, they can only help so much. | I need advice! College, majors, money, careers and jobs... |
t3_2xxb0k | relationships | Me [22F] with my GF [21F] for 2 years, girlfriend in pain over my behaviour. How to make her happy? | Ok, so a little background: Me and my girlfriend met about two years ago through shared friends and started hitting it off with each other and after a while became romantically involved with each other. From that point on we've pretty much been in a steady relationship(although only officially together for a bit over 1 year)
Fast forward to now and our "arguments" almost always turn in to me screaming, being violent and saying terrible things, all the while the situation does not really call for it.
I carry a lot of frustrations within me, i get very frustrated over minor things she does and takes it out full force on her. Often screaming and hitting things and being violent.
My girlfriend says that she still likes me as a person and she still wants to be with me, but she says that her body is disgusted by me and being close to me feels disgusting. So it's a physical feeling of disgust toward me.
We both suspect that i have ADD and depression which might lead to my outbursts, i am currently seeing a doctor to get a diagnosis, i am also looking at a lot of self help sites.
But what i need to know is how will i make my girlfriend happy and comfortable with me? I really need to know, i don't want to lose my girlfriend, please help me ! | Me causing lots of fight and being a bad person has caused my girlfriend a big ammount of pain and i need to know ways i can rebuild our relationship and make her happy. |
t3_3vy3d0 | dogs | [Breeds] Living in apartment while studying, what breed can I have? | I recently started university, and dont have a lot of time right now for a dog. But next semester I will have more according to my schedule and friends that are in higher years but in the same program.
I was initially very, very, into getting a beagle next summer. But I read that they can bark a lot, and need a lot of exercise, which I won't be able to offer every day every week (due to having multiple tests one week, or finals).
So what I am wondering, which breeds would you recommend for someone who is very, very interested in dogs and will love it above everything else. But have limited space and time to exercise it due to school (from approx. 8.00-17.00(tops), so, fulltime.
I really look forward to all of your answers, and I will read every single comment and really hope you are able to help me. | Really want a companion, live in apartment while in full time school, what breeds would fit/suit me? |
t3_1m0a91 | relationships | My (23F) long distance boyfriend (25M) came to visit me today but I have to do school work. Feeling guilty. | Hi reddit, I just need someone to talk to and possibly get some advice on how to handle this situation.
My boyfriend suddenly got up and moved 3 hours away from me earlier this year. Things have been rough, but we have managed to make it through the summer.
I go to school full-time taking a highly competitive and demanding program in the Health Sciences and also work almost full-time hours outside of class time to support myself. I generally go to class very early in the morning and work until late at night.
Today I came home from work and found a trail of my favourite flowers leading to my bed where he was waiting for me. So sweet and thoughtful! Turns out he had visited one of his friends the night before that lives an hour away from me, so he decided to come see me before he drove back home. He will be staying the night but leave tomorrow.
I jumped into bed and we kissed and cuddled for a little while before I told him how much school work I had to do tonight. He was very disappointed and asked if I wanted to have sex before I do school work. Well, I did, but holy eff I am extremely overwhelmed with school work tonight. Unfortunately I can't just have a sexy movie scene where I can just have a hot quickie, it takes a little while to get me going.
Besides reviewing lectures, preparing for lectures, and doing quizzes online, I also already have to study for a major test this coming week.
That's all I could think about when him and I were laying in bed!
So now I am sitting in front of my computer doing all this school work and feel awful because I have disappointed him. From what it looks like I will be doing school work until late into the night and will be getting up for class crazy early again. Probably no time to pay much attention to him, much less have sex. I feel like a terrible girlfriend.
I feel very guilty and conflicted. Do I put off the school work and fall behind or do I spend this little time that we get together with him? | Boyfriend that lives 3 hours away came to see me but I don't have time for him because of school. What to do? |
t3_ezw9x | loseit | Need some help/advice. | So here is my story:
I have always been overweight since I was a kid and have never been able to lose more than a few pounds (partly due to my thyroid problems). I took up cycling two and a half years ago and finally started losing weight! I lost about 30lbs in the first year or so putting me at 150lb. I spent most of last year (january-september) dieting and exercising everyday but only managed to get down to 142 (my lowest weight since middle school!). I got down to 142 rather quickly but no matter what I did I could not manage to lose any more than that. I finally gave up and have since gained 5 more pounds. I am graduating in May from college and would really like to reach my ultimate goal of 125-130lbs by then. Does anyone have any diet/exercise plans they would be willing to share with me? | I am female, 5'5", 147lbs and only have 4 months to lose 20lbs. Don't know how to do it and need help! |
t3_23dme4 | relationships | I [22F] need perspective, advice, options, on guy [22M] I've been dating for 4 months | I've been dating a guy for 4 months. Since the first time we met, it's been a whirlwind experience for me. We haven't gotten serious/committed because I'm at a uni in a different state and we didn't think it would be a wise decision to commit while we're long distant (but we've decided to exclusively date for now). We've visited each other a few times since January and each time I've grown to like him more. We've spoken everyday since we've met.
The chemistry between us is great.
There seems to be somewhat an expiration date on this. He's a foreigner so his choice to stay is limited. I recently found out that his yearlong stay might actually end sooner (visa problems). He tells me I shouldn't be concerned, but I am. My affections and my feelings for him have gotten serious.
I've thought about breaking it off completely and just being friends, but I like the way things are. To try to force myself (and him) to stop seems highly unnatural and would probably be difficult, but to keep going and have this sort of *potentially* looming cloud of expiration date on whatever it has seems dooming.
(I say potential because he's not sure if he's leaving or staying at the end of the year - that is if he can stay for that long)
**In addition**, we've had conversations about this and we're kind of trying to figure out what to do,but I also need to figure out what I want and what to do from my position, but I can't do that because I can't think objectively. I need some perspective.
Help! | Dating an awesome guy who might get deported/return to his country. Don't know what to do from here. |
t3_381wfr | relationships | Need advice! My SO (36/M) and I (28/F) keep arguing about the same thing and I think I'm being silly.. | Hi all,
My partner is divorced with a child who he has full time and I am nearly divorced (paperwork being submitted for the last time tomorrow, I hope). I also have a child whom I have full time. I'm a stay at home mum for both kids.
The kids get along great, they are both quite little and full on but we don't have any issues regarding them, I think we are both pretty respectful in regards to them and understand each other's needs from a step parent perspective.
There is this one thing I just cannot get past and I don't know why I keep making an issue of it, it's nearly torn us apart a few times now and no matter how much I try and not let it get to me I can't seem to get past it, I'm in counselling for this now and she's making it worse telling me I'm being totally normal which I know I'm not.. I've never been jealous before, I've had no reason to but I've never really had to deal with someone's ex in my life before.
We are very pro "the other parents" to our kids, we know they are important and encourage the relationships on both sides and respect each other's... Others lol
They are still connected financially, it's minimal, she was part of his business and he's making an effort to get her off all the financials.
She's just gotten remarried this week so I have no reason to feel the way I do?
I feel like they are too "chit chatty"? They're almost friends and I am having a hard time dealing with her giving him advice when it comes to his company or what else comes up... Am I wrong to want him all to myself? I know there needs to be a certain relationship for the kids but I just feel it's that bit too friendly my alarm bells are going off and I'm finding it hard to ignore!
I should mention he's never met my ex, he's 8 hours away and he didn't want to divorce, I keep them separate for the time being. | can't get over my jealous feelings towards my partners ex and I think I'm being silly. |
t3_vjz43 | AskReddit | How can we get our 9 month old daughter to sleep longer than 3 hours at night? | Our daughter's schedule is like this.
Around 9pm, she gets sleepy and fussy so I breastfeed her so she has some food for the night and she is out cold 30 minutes after feeding. I transfer her over to her crib where she sleeps til about midnight (if not sooner) and wakes up wailing until I get her on the boob.
I'm sure putting her right on the boob is going to (and has) conditioned her to expect the boob as soon as she stirs from any little sleep mode she's been in, so we try and pick her up and rock her to sleep with singing. This does work maybe 1 in 10 times and she'll be out again for another hour or two, but for the most part, she will get exponentially more hysterical if she isn't put to the boob.
I'm pretty sure she is waking up at night missing the breast and so she cries till she gets it. She doesn't seem to be hungry as she will suck for a minute and fall back to sleep. If we put her down before she is fully asleep, she will immediately wake and cry.
She's never had a period where she slept through the whole night like some lucky folks. I've read about getting the baby to sleep on her own, but we never were able to figure out how to do that. We have always had the problem of her getting hysterical if not on the breast so it has gradually gotten to this point of her waking very frequently at night.
We have changed her sleeping habits and she does not take naps in the afternoon, though she does sleep in the morning with multiple short naps, until about noon, which seems to be due to sleeping less at night.
And just a heads up, we don't believe in the "cry-it-out" methods. I expect her to have a good amount of crying when we are changing her sleeping habits, of course, just not leaving her there to cry it out on her own.
Any advice and help is greatly appreciated! | Our daughter won't sleep at night and seems to be addicted to the breast. How do we get her to sleep the whole night? |
t3_2am7xk | relationship_advice | [20/m] Asking post-relationship advice because my ex [20/f] still wants to hang with me | My post from a week ago:
So my girlfriend left me on tuesday night, after having a really rough week, I'm finally starting to get over of this. After my ex has starting to notice that I'm getting over, she has been starting to invite me over but still making clear for me to not get any hope of getting back (yesterday and today). Yesterday I did go over, we had a romantic night, it felt like we were a happy couple. Today I asked her about her not wanting to be with me in a relationship, and she told me that she wants to be independent and alone. She has been in relationships since she was like 13, so I kind of understand what she means.
Also a side note, that she has been taking depression and anxiety meds for a rough estimate of 4-5months, and those have changed her. But thing is that I'm really upset that even though she says she wants to be independent and alone, she has now asked me to come over yesterday and today. I'm not having any hopes of getting back, because I've already pretty much internalized that we wont get back together (for now, or forever). I'm not sure if I should go spend time with her, or if I should just be cold and ignore her requests, so she could really see what life is without me. I would definitely love to get back together with her, but somehow feel that filling her loneliness like this does not help the situation at all. She also told me today that she had fun hanging out with me. We did not have sex, because the ssri meds have made her pretty non-sexual, but we kissed and made out many times, and also had a goodbye kiss when she left for work in the morning. (just like a normal couple) | gf left me because she wants to independent, now she has asked me to come over to spend time with her, but still tells me to not bring any hopes of getting back together. |
t3_3ymz9c | relationship_advice | [21/m] My Gf [22/f] thinks she has to poke conversations with me every time we are away for a while [2-3 weeks] | So we've been having this problem since the beginning of our relationship (2 years+). She feels that I don't contact her often enough, and that she always has to be the one to contact me. Especially, when we are away from each other. Currently she is travelling, and for the first few days it was fine and then suddenly out of no where she drops the question "Why is it that I have to poke you to keep in touch whenever we are away? How come you don't have the willingness yourself?.......it's hard for me to believe that you can't text me once in two days. Low communication makes me feel ignored and I want to know why I need to tell you to keep in touch?"
Now that's her side, I am aware I'm not the best with keeping in touch. Heck my parents complain to me for not calling them often enough (which reminds me I should call them). So I am aware, but with her I especially try to be in touch. But there are these 2-3 days where I just ignore technology and like to be with my self. Maybe my phone battery runs out and I forget to change it, maybe I don't remember to switch the wifi on. I'm not that stuck to my phone. So my point is, that we have arguments over this topic a million times. And I have promised to her at the end of those arguments that I will change, and honestly I am trying to. I understand her pain for when she needs me I am not there. But how do I answer those questions she asked me? | gf thinks she begins every conversation when we are away, asked me why is it so. I have no answer except that's who I am, and I'm trying to change. |
t3_pkgcr | AskReddit | does reddit know of any celebrities that openly oppose sopa/pipa/internet censorship? | my sister was recently subpoenaed for illegally downloading pirated content. the funny thing is, someone hacked into her wireless network and downloaded this. she was accused of downloading a few horrifically titled gay adult films (titled "bareback street gangs" and, if i'm not mistaken, "teen anal sensation). apparently, after doing some research, she found out that this is a huge problem and that these companies create this films with these horrendous titles in order to track the people that download them illegally - and sue. most of the victims of this don't fight against it due to job reasons. let's be honest, who wants their name tied to a federal court case involving "teen anal sensation?" after doing her research, and finding that this is a hugely controversial issue, she decided that she wants to make a feature length mocumentary. she has the connections to major media sources, and can directly contact various sources in order to make this happen... the only problem is finding the celebrities who are advocates of maintaining the internet as we know it. so, my question is, are there any celebrities that publicly oppose the various internet censorship bills that are currently in legislation? if so, who and is there any link to them stating this? thanks reddit, i know you won't let us down! | my sister is being sued/accused of downloading some pretty messed up stuff and she wants to fight back by making a feature length film to expose the assholes who do this. we need celebrities for this. |
t3_476rcx | relationships | Me [24f] and SO [24m] - Is love enough? | Hi /r/relationships!
I'm a UK citizen and my boyfriend is from the US. We currently live and work in a 3rd country, where we met and began dating. We have been together for 4 months, and it has moved quickly. This gives me skme doubts - the pace at which we moved - but I look at him and he feels like home. Now the issue.
He is leaving in 4 months, and I will leave in 7. We both have career goals, which do involve us living internationally, but we need to put in some grind before these are an actuality.
My plan is to move to another country in October, and then back home in March, where I will go back to school for another year.
His plan is to move to DC, and then China for two years - both contributing to his career goals.
Realistically, I would not be able to join him until 2017. However, after I finish school I could find a job in any foreign country (except the states). He also wants to live abroad.
Basically, I'm not sure what I'm asking. It feels good to write it out. I love him, and we are both thinking up plans and ideas - maybe he could study in the UK? Maybe I could go to the USA for an extended visit next year?
I have never done this before but saw my best friend here go through a similar thing with her boyfriend. And they were from the same country! These visa issues add a whole dimension.
I am serious about him, and so is he, but I've always been vehemently against LDRs...its hard, heartbreaking, if you split it almost tarnishes the realtionship before, what if you don't end up married? Did you waste time waiting around or changing your career goals for another person?
We both said we wouldn't compromise on our goals for each other, and in fact ambition is one of the things that attracted us together.
Sorry, I'm rambling now. Any help or advice from people going through similar issues greatly appreciated. | Is love enough? What you need to think about before you commit to an LDR? |
t3_usjh6 | AskReddit | I apologize if there is a better reddit, I am kind of new..Bodybuilding question inside. | I looked at r/bodybuilding and they don't get much traffic so if you have a better suggestion I can delete this post and go there instead :(
I have been doing my exercises 3 sets of 8 reps per exercise before continuing to the next exercise. This sometimes leaves me too exhausted to finish my finishing exercises. I want to know if from experience is it more beneficial to do 1 set per exercise and do 3 full rotations of exercises. What would the meathead redditors suggest?
A little background information...I am trying to gain mass and already do cardio separately. I lift at a gym with lots of other people and it may be difficult at times to get on a bench/rack if there is a group of 3-4 people sharing. However, there are more than enough dumbbells and barbells to go around. If I wait too long between workouts I typically cooldown, muscles tighten, energy goes away, and I start to feel like I'm starving and I have to leave to go eat.
If any negative comments, please be a little constructive and I won't be upset :) THANK YOU EVERYONE AHEAD OF TIME | I wear out quickly doing 3 sets of each exercise before continuing to next exercise and sometimes I don't have energy to finish last exercises. However, I still want to get 3 sets in for each exercise. Is it more beneficial to do a full rotation of 1 set per exercise, and 3 rotations of exercises? |
t3_123k72 | AskReddit | What is the most inappropriately you have ever behaved, without realizing you were being inappropriate? | So I was sitting in class today, and like most of my classes, it is pretty boring. So I decided to crack open the old laptop and cruise reddit while "taking notes." I zoned out for a about ten minutes, and when I look up, the teacher is staring full on death eyes at me. Apparently my professor skipped straight from Piaget's Stages of Development to the psychology of death. According to a friend in the class, I was sitting there giggling to myself as my professor talked about her mom dying. So, reddit, on what occasions have you acted inappropriately without knowing it? | Giggled while my professor talked about dealing with death and grief |
t3_3clzho | AskDocs | Earache due to Infection. | I have a very bad earache (due to an ear infection). I went to the doctor and they gave me hydrocodone for the pain, but I end up barfing everything and its just a horrible medicine to take. I told my doctor this but then she told me to take ibuprofen, or any NSAID.
I did, Ibuprofen, acetaminophen, naproxen, and diclofenac. None of them took away the pain tbh. I took half of the dose of hydrocodone yesterday, and it really just took away the pain for like 1 hour and it came back. I have another appointment on Friday, with the doctor, but I just want to have some peace today and tomorrow.
**Is there anything else I can take for the pain?**
I also was given some eardrops for the pain but not working either.
Info: 23/F/USA/Recurring Ear Infections/1Week | I have an Earache that won't go away. I don't want to take Hydrocodone b/c I barf. NSAIDs won't do a thing. |
t3_1e71xl | dating_advice | (16 F) Dating an unattactive guy? | I am 16 and female. Recently, I've become close to a guy, who is also 16. We have a lot in common so we have a lot to talk about: music, video games, technology etc. we also both have autism and have some mental health issues. We've confided in each other and grown very close. He recently asked how I would react if he asked me out on a date. I explained most of the things I was feeling to him:
-I am inexperienced and have low self esteem. Would I be dating him for the wrong reasons? Would I be dating him just because he asked, because I desperately want to be wanted by someone.
-Friends and don't want to jeopardaise friendship.
-Mentally, am I ready for a relationship? However, we understand each others difficulties and support each other, so I would say this point is negated somewhat.
The main problem that I didn't tell him was that I'm not sure I find him physically attractive. I do not consider myself attractive, but I wonder whether I could "do better". I wonder whether I could adapt or whether we are doomed from the start if I find him unattractive. However, in terms of personaluty, we are very attractive. I find him very attractive in that regard. Would that be enough? | is an attractive personality enough to compensate for an inattractive appearance? |
t3_3wge6t | relationships | Me [23 F] with my SO of 1 year[22 M], he doesn't buy me expensive presents | Let me start off by saying, I'm not the type of girl who loves expensive things or thinks a relationship should be based off of giving presents, it's not me at all. This is my first serious relationship though, and I'm asking this question because I'm not sure how it is supposed to be or if I'm not in the norm, etc.
I've been dating my SO for about a year, but we've been best friends for 5. Neither of us have much money (I just started working full time, and my SO is finishing up school in May). We usually split things 50/50, but for anniversaries or my birthday he will take me to dinner.
Someone at work complimented me on my necklace today and I was like 'Thanks! My SO got it for me for my 6 month anniversary.' She asked where it was from and I said 'Tiffanys' and she's like "Oh, those are the cheap tiffany ones though. Was it only like $100 or something?' And I'm like, 'I think.... why does it matter?' And she's like "Oh, I would just be mortified if my SO bought that for me. He usually spends over atleast $200 on anniversary gifts and my engagement ring is 20K. Another co-worker chimed in (he's a male), and he's like "Yeah, I'm trying to get my GF a gift for christmas this year, but she would kill me if I spent that little on her though."
So... is this normal?? This is my first relationship so I'm not sure how things work. I'm afraid to bring it up to my SO because I don't want him to think I'm ungrateful or something.. | is this normal behavior? |
t3_2y0vik | Advice | What is a good city/area in California for someone like myself to move to? | Firstly, it doesn't necessarily HAVE to be in California, thats just where i'm thinking (mainly because of the weather).
I'm male, and I turn 23 in a month. I want to meet girls (and people) around my age range that are open minded, not super high maintanence or dramatic, not too materialistic, and chill. It'd be cool to live near some great college campuses because I think that would be a good avenue for me to try and meet new people.
As far as my personality goes, I like warm weather, nature, and beaches (there doesn't have to be beaches though). I am not materialistic. I eat healthy, and exercise often. I'm genuine and blunt. I rarely drink, and I smoke pot once every couple months. I work remotely in IT. I am pretty far left when it comes to the political spectrum.
I've heard San Luis Obispo and San Diego may be a good fit. | Whats a good place for me (a 23 year old male) to move to (preferably in Cali) that has warm weather and a lot of open minded, chill girls in my age range? Preferably places that have campuses with girls like that nearby too. |
t3_2jag62 | relationships | My [26F] mother [58F] told me today that she no longer loves my dad [60M]. I'm pretty upset about this. | My parents have known each other their entire lives. For as long as I can remember, my parents have been wonderful partners in life. They were excellent parents to me and my brother [30M] and they made a comfortable living for themselves after being dirt poor during their youths.
I noticed my mom becoming more and more frustrated with my dad over the past several months. My dad has become quite lazy and doesn't seem to take an interest in spending time with my mom when she asks. He complains a lot and definitely plays the "victim" role. My brother and I find this frustrating as well.
On the flip side, my mom is a stubborn Italian woman and can be a force to reckon with. She practically runs the household and works full time in a big job for a major corporation. She's tired and I think she's just been so fed up with my dad being a slug around the house that she's overly annoyed. Her frustrations come out in very abrasive communication. She gets very mouthy and demanding. My dad works a big job as well, but doesn't contribute anything else to the household. My mom pays the bills, grocery shops, cleans, etc. I help her with all of this because I don't think she should be doing it and try to make up for what my dad should be doing. But I digress.
As an adult, I know that after 34 years of marriage my parents were bound to grow apart at some point. I think as my brother and I got older, they didn't know what their roles were anymore. It was as if they couldn't remember how to be a couple without being parents. But I am having a hard time processing that my mother told me she fell out of love with my dad because they were my hopes for having a successful marriage in my future. Hearing my mother tell me all this just hurts and made feel doubtful about marriage. I love my parents dearly and it breaks my heart that they don't seem to love each other anymore.
Thanks for reading and any insight would be helpful. | Parents married 34 years growing apart. Mom says she doesn't love dad. Not sure how to process or understand. |
t3_vy9nb | AskReddit | Prom is tomorrow, but I believe I have a fever... I might not be able to attend. Should I go? Also, what major events in your life have you had to miss out on because of illness or injury? | I was so excited for prom tomorrow because it meant I would get to see my girlfriend and all my good friends that I haven't seen this summer. Unfortunately, I woke up today with a stiff neck and sore throat, and as the day progressed I developed a fever. It's very tough deciding what to do, because I don't want to infect people, but at the same time I will never have an opportunity to attend prom again. This made me wonder what reddit would have to say about the subject, and how many other people have been in a similar situation. So, reddit: should I go or not? And have you ever had similar experiences? | Feel sick, debating on going to prom. Yes or no? Has anything like this happened to you? |
t3_nc1fl | relationships | Do I allow my SO to have sex with someone else? | 25/f here, went on medication anxiety and hormone shots for other health problems. To say my sex drive took a dive would be a HUGE understatement. My boyfriend and I (have been dating 3 years) went from having sex pretty much every day/ multiple times a day to pretty much not at all. I have absolute zero desire to have sex and when I do it's not enjoyable and never leads to orgasm. I can tell that this is having a significant effect on our relationship, he has been really supportive but I'm sure it's difficult to go from having a gf that wants to have sex anytime, anywhere to having one that never wants to be intimate. A friend of mine suggested I let him have a 'hall pass' to fulfill his sexual needs elsewhere, would I be crazy to allow it? | Medication destroyed my sex drive, do I give my bf a free pass to have sex with other women? |
t3_24iz36 | relationships | I [19M] am in relationship with a [19F] of 3~ months, she wants to make it work even though I have been unfaithful... but I don't | Me and a girl started seeing each other casually, and I said I was not looking for anything exclusive or serious. Over time, we started to develop feelings for each other, but she still was not 100% trustful of me due to me seeing several other women in the early stages of our relationship.
Even though we did not try to define our relationship, we established that we were exclusive, and had told each other that we love each other, etc. Not a traditional relationship I guess, but for all intents and purposes, we were together.
One weekend soon after, I slept with another girl and immediately regretted it. I confessed to my infidelities, to which she (understandably) did not respond very well. After insulting me and swearing me off completely, I attempted to make things right with her. Over time, she came to fully love me again, and I am still in love with her.
However, she still does not trust me. I don't think she ever will. I don't want to miss out on the college experience because I'm trying to convince this girl that I'm not cheating on her. We fight constantly, which she disagrees with and just says we are communicating about our issues. At least once or twice a week, she is left in tears at something that I have done that hurt her, yet she keeps coming back.
I'm left with a tough decision - stay in a dysfunctional relationship in which we both love each other very much but with intense emotional strain, or cut things off and move on even though she is fighting hard against that option. | Exclusive with girl, I cheated. I tried to fix things, but am realizing that it's impossible to fix. Stay with the dysfunctional relationship or move on? |
t3_3qta46 | relationships | I [20M] went on a dinner with a long-time friend [20F] and not sure if she's interested | I've known this girl for about 10 years since middle school. We are not particularly close and for the last 2 years do not really talk to each other. Let's call her Megan.
Both Megan and I go to college in the same city. Two or three weeks ago, she messaged me to go out with her for a dinner, supposedly with another mutual friend of us. To be honest, I was just expecting a reunion between long-time friends. However, when we met up, the third friend did not join our dinner and it was just me and Megan.
It was an awkward dinner as we have not seen each other for quite a while but we found a lot of things in common to talk about. Throughout the dinner, I found out that she recently broke up with her boyfriend. From then, she kept hinting that we should get together more often, naming places and restaurants that we should go together.
After that, we went back to her place, now that our third friend joined in having completed his commitments of the night. We three talked and caught up with one another. Again, the third friend left early again and it was about 1 or 2 a.m. Only me and Megan left. I stayed there for another half an hour after we watched some videos online.
So the thing is I am not sure what is going on here, whether she's interested in me or I'm making all this up in my head. I am afraid that if I make a move on her and she does not feel the same, it would ruin our friendship. We haven't talked since and I kinda want to ask her out for another dinner. | Long-time friend, who recently broke up with her boyfriend, suddenly asked me out for dinner. I'm not sure whether she's interested or if I am being delusional. |
t3_3j1rr0 | Advice | Stuck between learning a skilled trade or continue college. Please Help. | I'm in my second year at Community College and I need help deciding my future. Coming from a low-income family, I never had much of any opportunities growing up. My siblings are virtually useless people, who would rather go to parties and do drugs and never help our parents. Luckily I have always been one to help my family during tough times, as I continue to go to school to better my life. The problem is that I don't know what to do. I want to learn a skilled trade because it has always been a fascination of mine (HVAC, Carpentry, Automotive Repair, Plumbing) something that is both useful and functional. Don't get me wrong, I'm currently working on a mathematics degree. My past intention was to go to a four-year university and get a Bachelor's degree in Mathematics; however, unlike most of my peers that ignore the current trends of higher education, it is getting more and more expensive to get a bachelors degree, and I know that the trades are highly underrated. The problem is that I am the first person in my family to go to college, and with a viable chance of earning a Bachelor's. I feel that my family wants to make an example of me, in which I am some sort of beacon of hope, and if I diverge on my current path and go learn a trade, it would be a slap in the face to all of my friends and mentors, as well as being seen as a waste of potential. So here I am on Reddit seeking the infinite wisdom of my fellow redditors. Please help. | Smart first-generation college student from a poor family. Likes building stuff and learning technical skills, friends and family thinks I am wasting potential. I am lost and don't know what to do. |
t3_488xws | relationships | Me [19 M] with my GF [20 F] 6 months, Am I overthinking? | Background: Im currently at college 5 hours away, she goes to a community college. we were friends for about 6 months before. We are religious but not freaks you know?
We were talking about whether she she should join a sorority.
She was super excited and said after she gets her associate's degree she is transferring to a 4 year University. I obviously agreed, it's a great idea. Then she brought up that in the spring she wanted to join a sorority. Here's were im a little hesitant. Im supportive of her decisions but I also know how sorority's are ( at least for my school) There are parties occasionally, a lot of extra curricular activities that take up a lot of time. That being said, i told her that it's a lot of work (she is already super busy and suffers from anxiety regularly) and that it could be overwhelming. and im not sure if i would be comfortable with her going to parties, socials, formals, etc. anything with alcohol really (she has a history of easily succumbing to peer pressure).
She gets super defensive and tells me that i haven't said anything positive about it and im not seeing her point. I DO see her point (its good to make friends, life experiences, etc.) It's just that she refuses to see the cons. She says i just dont want her to forget about me (true, but its not the only reason) Also, she says that im not supporting her decisions, and that i dont care. Which is completely NOT true.
I guess my question is; Am i wrong to be the voice of reason? or Should i just let her make her decisions and support no matter what?
It hurts my heart to hear her say that i dont care about her decisions please help! | She wants to join a sorority and presents only Pros, I offer some Cons; She says i dont care about her wishes...Am i wrong and overthinking? |
t3_l7bqd | AskReddit | Might have child to my ex, what do I do? | The backstory, I dated this girl, lets call her jess for a year and a half. Things went pretty decently for the year, but then I went to college an hour away. I would come home and see her, and always talk to her, but she just wasn't happy. So she ended up leaving (after a lot of fighting).
One thing Jess really wanted was a child, which me being 19, wasn't ready for. In one of our fights she said "If you won't give me one [child], I'll find someone who will". So me and her end up breaking up, but still somewhat talk. Christmas break rolls around and I come home, and we end up dating for about a week or so. But she ends up leaving me again, and within two weeks, has a new boyfriend.
After that, I was just done with her, but shed keep talking to me, and told me she was pregnant with my child. I was devastated, but kinda skeptical because she lied about almost everything. This whole time she is telling me she still loves me and misses me and wants to work things out, but she is still with her boyfriend.
After a month or so of being with him, Jess tells me that her boyfriend left her because of the baby. I kinda doubted it but didn't really care. A few months go by and I was home from college and decided to meet with Jess briefly. I noticed a ring on her ring finger and question her, when she immediately becomes shady and tried to hide it, saying she found it in her jewelry box.
After that, I find out Jess and her boyfriend have been engaged, while shes been telling me she loves me, the baby is mine, she misses me and wants me back. So she just had the child a few days ago and I have no idea if its mine or not because she told me its mine, but is acting like its her fiancé's. I havent talked to her in months but its been eating at me as to whether I am a dad or not. | Ex girlfriend lied about everything, told me she is having my child while she is engaged to another man. |
t3_2q2cq4 | tifu | TIFU by condemning my best friend's life choices | (Throwaway, obviously)
Backstory: I'm 30 and living the other side of the world from "home". Acquaintances are many, friends are few. I've been spending more and more time with M, one of the most wonderful people I've ever met. M is single, gay and plans to raise children by herself in the near future.
Having already been invited to spend Xmas with M and her family, on Saturday I went to a party held by one of M's friends. I drank all day, she was driving and so did not. On the drive home (and I had to be reminded of this after the event), the conversation turned to M's plans for children and I mentioned my reservations about this being the best way to go about starting a family.
Here's the thing: the way I said it is not my opinion at all. At best, I would want her to think about things carefully, and would suggest that having a solid partner/career first might be the best way forward. But I'm absolutely on board with her decision (she's a super-intelligent woman and I trust her explicitly). Apparently, the way I phrased it included words like "unconventional" and "a bad idea", and I came across like a narrow-minded tool.
Now, this isn't about the politics or rights and wrongs of her decision. I'm now in the situation where, despite her being patient with me, I'm uninvited from Xmas as she doesn't want me causing a scene like that around her family. She's one of my only friends in the world, and I've alienated her to the point where she thinks what I said at that time was "the real me" and the rest of the time I've been holding back.
So yeah, sorry this isn't a story about sending an email to the wrong person by mistake or pooping myself in public. It's just a cathartic means of dealing with what I have to live with; an incredibly important friendship, now held together by a thread because of a conversation I don't even remember having, and don't agree with. | I got drunk, I said things I don't remember and don't mean, my best friend now sees me totally differently. |
t3_37zb8i | pettyrevenge | My brother gets a "TASTE" of revenge. | New to the sub and this happened a couple years ago but its a good petty and accidental revenge.
So I am the oldest of 6. I have 5 younger siblings and growing up in a large family was taught "sharing is caring." Which is fine and I am a good older brother not too selfish. One thing I am not to keen on sharing is drinks. I like to keep them for myself and if someone would like a drink I expect them to ask. Most my siblings know this about me and are fine with it but one of my brothers does not care. We will call him Dan. Numerous times I have caught Dan drinking my drinks without asking. If I left something in the fridge or went out to eat and it was in a cup. This makes my blood boil. He won't ask he will take gulps or claim it as his own. He knows it bothers me but does nothing to change it.
So one time I was sick flu and cold like symptoms. I had been down and out. Drinking Gatorade well I drank most of it maybe two drinks left. Well I was sick coughing up phlegm and mucus, so being done drinking I decided to spit in the Gatorade bottle. I was getting up to go get more tissue from the bathroom. Upon returning I find Dan retching and dry heaving above the kitchen trash. I see the Gatorade bottle on the kitchen counter and smile in delight. As I left to the bathroom Dan had seen my Gatorade bottle and decided to help himself to a drink. Little did Dan know I had just spit my phlegm and mucus into the bottle upon drinking it he realizes this and proceeds to spit up and throw up in the trash. He got a taste of revenge for every time he has stolen or drank my drinks, as he drank my spit. Accidental revenge complete. | Brother drinks my spit after years of taking drinks from me without asking. |
t3_eq09q | AskReddit | I owe a lot of money and would appreciate any advice to fix that. | This time last year I took out a loan for AU$25k in order to pay for travelling the world for a year and generally to have a wild time without worrying about money. The time has come for me to return home and start earning cold hard cash again with a 9-5 job.
I owe roughly AU$19k at the moment and I'm looking to pay it off as quickly as possible. I'm going to be working from January onward and I see no reason I couldn't simply make the required payments for the next few years and pay it off the normal way but I'd really like to knock it out quickly.
To that end, I'd appreciate any advice anyone has on ways to save money quickly or some smart investments I should make that would see large returns quickly.
I'm very bad with money (as you may have guessed) and so I turn to those with experience and wisdom to impart. Teach me the ways of the financially responsible so that I might pay my debt early and still afford to buy beer and noodles and maybe one of those new xbox's sometime next year. | I suck with money and I want to make 20k as fast as possible without dealing drugs (unless you know someone?), help me out in exchange for cookies and kind thoughts. |
t3_4wgo0z | dating_advice | Confused | I met a girl, maybe 2 months. Met her at a bar. Both of us were very drunk and ended up having quickie in a bathroom (I know...grimy. Passion and not having anyone else to go were leading factors). Got her number and we were talking little bits from there. She's in her mid 30s, I'm in my early 20s so this is new to me. Hasn't had a boyfriend-type (cause I'm not boyfriend) in 6 years due to her busy-ness.
Both us are very busy (caught her on like the only night she found time to go out, so luck there!) and live about an hour away from each other. She's on vacation now, though. I've seen her in person two times since that first interaction, one of the times we had sex again (fucking incredible chemistry in that territory). Most interaction is through text and photo.
Here's where I get confused. When we chat (usually via text; seldom phone call), we'll be chatting for a little bit and then she'll hit me with that radio silence. Normally I wouldn't give a shit, but it makes me question whether she's really interested. When this happens and I wait a few days to message her again (seldom does she first initiate), she'll say shit like "what happen to you? why I no hear from you?" or whatever and then talk about how much she misses me. Last weekend, she actually called me very late talking about how when she thinks of me with other girls (even though we're not in anything monogamous), she gets very jealous. Then as our conversation went on, she said we should talk on the phone more if I have time. I'm like "sure. you're fun to talk to". Trying to initiate this more hasn't worked out really, mainly due to her inconsistent phone usage (again, will randomly stop responding in mid conversation or just not respond and most of the time won't initiate until I do so). | Talking to a girl who seems into me. Sex is great, awesome communication when we do chat. But she has a habit of no response to texts or just randomly stop texting mid convo. |
t3_2ywzed | tifu | TIFU by trusting my circadian rhythm | This happened literally all this morning.
So I'm used to waking up at 6:30 am, so much so that recently my body has just been waking me up then or minutes before my alarm goes off. Well this morning I had an exam (2 exams actually) at 7:30 am. I was up late last night so I decided "Ok i'll take a nap and wake up at 4am, go to the library and study before the exams". I also decided that I didn't need to set my usual alarm because if I decided to stay in bed my body would wake up on time anyway.
Well come 4am I wake up and decide to change it to 5am..I don't need that long to study anyway. This is where the FU happens. I literally don't remember anything (I think I blacked out lol) but I turned off my alarm in my fucking sleep and the only thing that woke me up was one of my roommates coming home at 7:10 am. It takes me at least 30 minutes to walk to my class building.
I ran to campus, got laughed at by construction workers, got huge blisters on my heels from not having time to put on socks, and them promptly failed both exams for the class because of how frazzled I was. And going to NYC this week for a service trip so these blisters will be fun to walk around with. | I trust my circadian rhythm with my life (exams), it fucks me over. |
t3_1xf8c8 | relationships | [Relationship/Personal Issue] I'm [22/F] am kinda heart broken at the moment. My boyfriend [26/M] won't spend my birthday with me. More in the extended. | So I asked my boyfriend to take the day off which is a month from now. He said no but within the same month he was gonna take a week off to go out of town with me but I had to cancel it before he could ever request those days off. I don't see why he wouldn't take off for it but for some reason he won't. I tried talking him into it but he called me a bad influence for trying to get him to take the day off. This is the first I've ever been actually unhappy about something in our relationship. I never really cared about birthdays because I've never had a good one. I've always been alone for them but I guess I got my hopes up thinking it might be different this year. I'd tell him this but I don't want him to take off out of pity. I'd rather be alone and heartbroken. Just kinda needed to get this off my chest I guess. | Boyfriend doesn't wanna take off a day of work to spend my birthday with me but was willing to take a week off for a trip that had to be cancelled. |
t3_3jt1oe | tifu | TIFU, cuz my pc (GPU) caught fire! | Heyy guys, Storytime ;)
2 days ago my PC randomly shuts, i ask my brother (whos sitting next to me) why the fuck did u shut down my pc? his response: I've done nothing. so i start my pc again and see my fans start working no screen tho. then i notice a flame coming out of my graphics card!(msi twin frozr gtx 770) i freaked out and started pulling out all of the wires of my pc! (luckily ive done this otherwise my whole pc died) so i've concluded now my gpu died. So went back to the store where i bought the gpu and got a sweet ass deal to upgrade for 100 euro to a msi gtx 970! nice service :) | GPU caught fire, freaked out, went back to the store were i bought it from and got a nice cheap upgrade :) |
t3_21f9ss | relationships | Update, please help if you can: Me [22F] with my ex [20 M] 1.5 years, he's suicidal and I don't know what to do | I just got the following email, and I'm freaking out. I don't have his home address, and no phone to call the cops. I haven't broken no contact, and don't want to drive to stop him because of reasons listed in the previous post
the email: I'm writing you this letting you know that I really have decided to kill myself. I can't bare this world anymore, the bitterness, the pain, the miserable feeling I have every waking second. I don't want you to blame yourself for this, because you made me feel more alive than I probably ever have. And I really hope you do find happiness and do give relationships another try. Who knows maybe we're both wrong and there is an afterlife and maybe I'll see you there. Probably not though so keep being you, you're amazing, beautiful, insanely smart and witty. Make the world your bitch you're destin for great things. But I guess this is the end for me, kinda thought I'd go differently but I guess I laugh the loudest this time. I love you D and always will.
Love,
X
I'm freaking the fuck out, and have no idea what to do | Ex sent suicidal email, family isn't responding on facebook/haven't seen the warning, and I have no idea where he is and no way of calling the police |
t3_1eewse | relationships | I [22F] am moving in with my boyfriend [24M] of 2.5 years and I don't know how to tell my catholic mother. | My boyfriend and I are financially independent and plan on moving in together. I am starting a Master's in Physics halfway across the country (Canada) and he is getting transferred here. We are ready and the timing is right. There is just one issue.
I am worried about how to explain this to my very catholic mother. I know she will be *devastated*.
(If you aren't familiar with catholic teaching on 'living in sin', check [this] out.)
Keeping this from her has been very hard as I lived at home before I left, and she still feels very close to me and texts me everyday.
The catholic church has ruined so much for me, but I want to respect her beliefs when I talk to her. So how can I ease the blow? Is it better to tell her in person when I visit or from a distance? Before or after he moves in? How should we word it? | Just moved away from home and don't know how to tell my fanatically catholic mother that my boyfriend and I will be living together |
t3_34qhx8 | relationships | My [25 M] past two relationships [25 F] lasted for a month, and ended very similarly. Should I have done something different? | Back in November, I was really hitting it off with a girl I had initially met on Tinder. After about five weeks, it abruptly ended after her grandmother passed away. She said she was already feeling overwhelmed and stressed, and now she had to deal with family stuff as well. There wasn't any discussion of going on break, or saying we would meet up again when she figured things out, it was a pure breakup which ended very calmly.
In March, I found myself in a very similar situation. I was a rebound for a friend of a friend. Things were going well, and then about a month into our relationship, she said she needed some time to be single to "sort things out". I figured that was perfectly reasonable, so we stopped talking, but promised to stay friends. About a week later, she was back with her ex. The last time we talked on the phone, she said I "should have fought harder for her".
Obviously there are added details (which I'd be more than happy to share), but I'm mostly thinking about the parallels between these two break-ups. In both cases, I was extremely laid-back while getting dumped because I could not think of any better action to take. Obviously, in a more serious relationship, both people would work hard to understand the other person's needs and make things work, but it seems obsessive to be making demands after the first month. Or maybe that's just a very Nice-Guy, White Knight way of looking at these situations.
I've always had a "if you love someone, set them free" mentality about this kind of stuff, but given my track record, I'm starting to have some doubts. Even then, I have no idea how I could have approached those two situations differently. Thoughts? | I think I am too passive when my relationships hit their first bump, and need a better approach when the word "break-up" is first suggested, even in a non-serious relationship. |
t3_1jpnzg | relationships | My boyfriend [28M] has been living with his ex-gf and I'm [21F] unsure of what to say to him | I've [21F] been dating my boyfriend [28M] for only a couple months. We work together at a motorcycle shop and we met through the HR department who swapped us phone numbers. We hit it off really well and have been dating. He's sweet, caring, and thoughtful; much different than the college aged bozo's I've been seeing.
Except one thing bothers me. He's been living with his ex-woman for a few months...since like February. He hasn't moved out because he says he doesn't have to money to do so. He tried to move back home to his parent's house, but he said his dad was more annoying than her, and he moved back after two weeks. I have been living with roommates (there are five of us in a three-bedroom place, its cramped) and I don't have the ability to really move him with me, though I wouldn't really want us living together since we haven't seen each other more than 3 months. I also really do like my personal space and since I don't have much of it, I savor what I do have.
I guess my question here is, should I be worried he's still living there? He's bailed out a couple times when he said he's going to visit me on our one day off during the week. Am I the only one who finds it weird that he's STILL living with his ex? | I don't know what to say to my boyfriend about him living with his ex=girlfriend for almost half a year. |
t3_14hjdg | AskReddit | I have a bad time understanding human speech. Help diagnose me. | For as long as I can remember I have always had very difficult time trying to comprehend people talking. I can't follow television programs or movies and usually about 10% of what is said actually gets through to me, having people talk longer than 5 seconds my mind is lost, but when they mention any sort of analogy I understand completely, even if I stare and focus with all my strength I can't make out the words, when I watch TV I usually watch it with subtitles, because when I read I can pick up about 70% of what they say. I grew up thinking I was stupid because the teachers would sound muffled and garbled, not because I was bored and tired like every other kid (its popular today to claim ADD, when instead kids are just bored and don't want to be in class) but I genuinely wanted to learn and tried hard to focus, I thought I was stupid but my teachers would tell my mother I had a bright unique mind and a few others claimed genius (I knew that was a stretch but it sure tickled my ego taint) so... What do you guys think? | I cant focus or comprehend when people talk or television programs have dialogue. |
t3_2xnbro | offmychest | After 10 years I've found it. | Ever since I was 5 I loved the drums. So much so that I'd spend hours banging on myself with my hands, I'd always loved percussion and always had particular ideas for songs and album concepts. At the age of 13 I got my first set, I played on it, just banged on it for a year to find my musical soul. Starting last year my thoughts towards the drums and music started to cohere together and I had a basic understanding of what I wanted to achieve. Fast forward to early this year when I found the relatively small progressive rock. Slowly getting into, I decided to add some influences of progressive rock into my playing and music ideas. These past two weeks I had an epiphany, these bands specifically Porcupine Tree was the music I wanted to play. Ambient, psychedelic, I know it's not that big of deal all bands and artists have had these first moments. But I never thought I'd have it.... The feeling is just beyond unreal experience. To finally and completely know what you want in your life and at such a young age. Tonight it's raining heavily here in LA, I love the rain, I always feel inspired in it. And tonight I had the most important epiphany I've had so far, the musical idea that's been tantalizing me for almost 11 years has now finally come fully to my mind, I know what I want. After 11 years it's all come together and I'm so close, I can't believe this moment is happening to me. | After almost 11 years of having a small idea of what I want to do with music I finally have grasped the concept of it on this day. Yeeeeaahhhhhh. |
t3_2zwk2o | askwomenadvice | what to text her to be clear but not make things awkward | hello,
i would like some female perspectives on this topic as my male friends arent a big help.
Story:
i [24m] know a girl [21f] for a few month. we went to a bar (3 times) and talked for hours (with a few drinks) - she is by no means shy with words but when it comes to physical contact: nothing.
im not the best when it comes to show interest but assumed that its clear that i like her... but now im not sure if she is on the same page.
other girls i met in the past were more straight forward with their intentions (with words and physical contact).
so im not sure if she wants to be just friends or if she is a bit insecure (due to inexperience) or just not the kind of girl who starts with the touching thing.
so the next time i text her to meet up, i want to be more specific/clear that i like her more than a friend and that it would be sort of a date.
my (male) friends tell me not to do it because its not good to show emotions/intentions straightforward via text because it will make me "weak" and she will lose every sexual attraction (if there is any) and will see me more as a friend? | good/bad idea to be straightforward about emotions/intentions via txt? |
t3_3ermyp | relationships | Me [20/F]. How can I stop needing the approval of my SO? | So I am in my 20s and I am dating this guy for more than a year. Back in my single days I used to be a pretty confident person and my values seemed very settled. As we started dating this whole view I had for my life came down because I was readjusting myself to this new perspective (of being with someone). I am aware I still have those reasons why people have confidence (good appearance, professional skills, social skills etc). I know those things aren't enough to build true confidence and maybe that's why I am so insecure now (plus the readjusting thing).
My emotional communication with my parents was never good so I was lead to think that my feelings doesn't matter much and that they're weakness. Rationally I know this is not true, but it can not enter the realm of my low self esteem.
My SO likes to take things lightly, joking and stuff because it seems to him that things become easy to relate this way - what I think work in most cases. What happens in some situations is that I feel my worries are not taken seriously (yes, I have mentioned that to him) but maybe he is bad at emotional communication too.
Being this true or not I feel the need to stop needing his approval. Little things he forgot, things he says, people who get more attention than I - all those things strengthen my insecurities. I am aware it's not healthy for me or my relationship to demand those things as well. I would really appreciate some advice on how can I be more independent of his attention and my insecurities. | self steem issues leading to need of approval, asking advice on how can I overcome my insecurity on that matter. |
t3_13mt1w | relationships | Am I doing the right thing? Both 20. | After being "off" with a girl for a seven months she comes back. I'm incredibly happy, everything is going great. She then tells me while we were apart she tried things with her ex again, he really screwed her up and she is super depressed about it. I then find out she went on a date with another guy within two days of telling me she was feeling super depressed and cutting off all contact with her ex, when I asked her about it she said that she thought she was falling for this guy because she didn't feel the pain from her last boyfriend. That is something I can't give her, as we were a long distance couple. I then decided to just give her space because I'm not entirely sure what she wants. If she's using this guy as a rebound or if I was the rebound. Am I doing the right thing by just letting things run it's course? Right now I'm fighting the biggest urges to just fight for her. It's a messed up situation and I'm a mess. I really do care about this girl, I thought about her everyday while we were apart. She said she thought about me a lot too and regrets ever getting back with her ex and that I am the first girl she's ever had true feelings for. | don't know if I should fight for a girl or just let her figure herself out. Scared she won't come back like she did last time. |
t3_35f1tr | relationships | My [17M] ex [16F] texted me after one week of No Contact. What is her intention and do I respond? | Short summary of the break up- Relationship goes downhill. I talk to ex during a class trip and she says she lost the spark/gave up on us. An hour later she is sleeping next to one of my friends. The whole trip she is flirting with my friend and one of her other friends. This was a week ago and I haven't spoken to her since and I've chosen to cut the three of them out of my life (my "friend" was disrespecting our friendship).
Yesterday she texts me along the lines of "Ive been hearing that you hate A and B (guys she was flirting with). I'm not dating anyone and I have more respect for you than that. I'm sad that you'd think I'm like that and that you'd say those things."
What is she trying to do by texting me? Also, should I even respond? I am leaning towards ignoring her. | Ex broke up with me a week ago. Flirts with my friend. Texts me that she heard that I now hate my friend/she's sad that I'm angry at my friend and that I'd say those things to other people. What is the purpose of her text and what is my next step? |
t3_1ubk89 | AskReddit | Hey reddit, how did you get your account name? | I was thinking about this the other day and remembered why i had named my account aTrafficCone. as silly as it seems me and my friend back in our highschool days had a game of 'acquiring' a cone from the best place we could, be it from the school parking lot, or it was 1/50 on a stretch of highway. Looking back now i feel bad for taking the cones because someone somewhere had to replace them, but on the bright orange side, there are traffic cones around my friends houses in case someone gets in an accident they could mark it off with cones. | Me and my friends stole a bunch of traffic cones, good times. |
t3_cgtro | AskReddit | My sister (early teens) is starting to talk to friends via webcam. I assured our mother it was safe. How much did I lie? | My sister, as do most early teens here, has discovered the delights of talking to her friends on Windows Live Messenger. And recently has found the use of the camera at the top of her laptop. Our mum, being not great at understanding modern technology is a bit dubious. Shs's not that worried that she will talk to strangers and get stabbed in a field but she is worried that things she types or does over the webcam can be found and used against her by others. She asked me and I assured her that there is no way that anyone other than the other person in the coversation can see or read anything the goes between them. How much of a lie was that? | I told mum that there is no way anyone can see or read anything my sister does over Windows Live Messenger. How wrong was I? |
t3_23cvvt | Parenting | I don't know how to deal with this. | I have a very emotional 12 year old daughter. She enjoys spending her evenings in her room, listening to music. I was informed by my stepson last night as I was heading to bed that my daughter was crying earlier. When I said good night to her, she was fine, so I thought nothing of it. But as I got into bed I decided to send her a quick text to ask if she was ok.
Me: hey, are you ok?
Her: its stupid it doesn't matter. its just magcon. my fav person is leaving now 4 guys are leaving and the rest are confused and the family is falling apart. So yeah whatever.
Me (confused because I don't know what the hell "magcon is": don't say whatever. Obviously this is important to you & I'm sorry you're sad.
Her: ya ive been crying since 9. its more then important
At this point it was 10:51 pm. She has been crying for early two hours?!
I googled magcon. I don't get it. What is this? A bunch of boys from YouTube who travel and meet with girls?!
She is absolutely distraught because some of these boys from magcon are going somewhere else. How does one even deal with this?! I googled magcon again today and there are people on twitter using the hashtag #cutformagcon - these crazy fans are cutting themselves!!!
Anyone?! Help? Please?! I can't even imagine the kind of mess she would be if one of these boys died!! | 12 year old distraught over "magcon" boys. |
t3_4obrf6 | jobs | A girl is trying to lie on me at work to get me fired even though she's bothering me, should this be forgiven when she's trying to get me into trouble for what I told her outside of work? | So people told me to address this girl trying to lie on me at work outside of work and I did...she's trying to use what I said to her outside to get me into trouble at work even though it was after work hours and I didn't say anything threatening at all -- just pretty much told her and her friends to leave me alone at work.
Don't know why she would even show HR my texts because she's only proving my point with what I said in the texts. I told her to stop giving me dirty stares as if she wants to fight me at work and if I wanted to talk to her little friends I would have gone up to them myself I don't need her or her other friends running off telling them what I said.
I called her a "lying bitch" after hours and she's trying to use that showing HR saying I called her a "bitch" in texts. Ah ha ha.
I mean isn't this a bitch move? Even though she's harassing me at work, I ignore her at work, and I address her outside of work with non-threatening texts, she's trying to use that to file a false report on me at work.
Meanwhile, she's created a hostile work environment at work. She did get suspended for falsifying me, but should I go all the way in getting her fired? Had HR believed her that could have been my job. I feel this one shouldn't be forgiven, especially since she's bringing her personal problems to work when people are here to work. | I guess I just would like some validation that I'm doing the right thing. I try to be a forgiving person, but hey she tried to lie on me and had HR believed her I would have been fired! I got her number from when I thought she was cool to talk to and was a "friend" so I addressed her in two texts. |
t3_2uaqc6 | relationships | My friends and I (M23) after approx 2 years of relationships with girls (F21) would like to understand why girls seem to give up in relationships without trying to solve the issues. | This is more of a question directed to the females, but if any guys have any insight too, that would be great!
So a couple of my friends and I have had a couple of serious relationships before and 9 times out of 10, the girls have broken up with us because their reason was that they weren't happy. Now, we're all very committed guys, who 100% would try and work out and work through these issues in order to keep the girl happy or keep the relationship happy and working. But very often, the girl just gives up. She will claim that she still loves him, but if that were the case, surely she would stick around and attempt at solving the problems that lie ahead, rather than just giving up. We understand that if the problem cannot be solved then fair enough, we should part ways, but it seems like the girls that we've come across just don't even want to try. Am I wrong to think that the reason for girls in these situations doing this is because they're either lazy or don't love the guy enough to work through the problems? Or is it perfectly acceptable to just give up just because the girl is "unhappy"? And if so, why is that acceptable?
Thank you for your insight! Just trying to understand the other half's perspective as to hurt a little less in the future. | Do girls just give up on relationships because they're lazy or don't love the other one enough to work through problems? Or is it acceptable to just walk away without trying because they're unhappy? If so, why is that acceptable? |
t3_357tuo | relationships | Help me (M 33) please! My girlfriend (F 29) of one year is a virgin and either sexually repressed or asexual. | Hello reddit. I desperately need some advice and guidance.
I am a 33, and my girlfriend is 29. We have been together for just over a year, and the relationship has become very serious. We are both very in love and the idea of a future together has definitely crossed our minds.
There is, however, a significant issue that I just can't reconcile or understand - sex. My girlfriend is a virgin, and even though we do other things sexually besides intercourse, she has a low to non existent sex drive.
Her virginity is a personal decision (not a religious one), and I have accepted that she is not ready. genuinely I'm okay with waiting - I don't want her to feel pressured in any way. What unsettles me though is that she is very very frightened of it - she worries about pain, disease, pregnancy, and when I get to close when we are fooling around she physically recoils.
As far as what we do sexually, it's tbh, just not enough - far too infrequent, and (again being honest), not very good. She also recoils from orgasm - whenever she is close, she just stops and won't let herself be touched anymore. Frankly, she just doesn't seem to be into it. She claims to have never masturbated.
I'm totally conflicted because I have never met someone as amazing as her and I truly want to be with her. I don't know if it's straight up repression, or asexuality, or what. For what it's worth she is Korean American, and a second child. Her older sister was (and is) troubled: into drugs, sex etc, and so my girlfriend was (and is) the "good child." It was a very big deal for me to meet her parents - and its the only time she's ever been allowed to introduce a boyfriend to them.
So Reddit, thank you for reading, any genuine guidance is greatly appreciated. | girlfriend is a virgin and probably either repressed or asexual. |
t3_nohbe | AskReddit | Does anyone work for UPS? Am I being fed a lot of crap? UPS killed Christmas (details inside) | I shipped a package to my girlfriend on 12/21 with 2-day air service, which guarantees delivery on 12/23 (today). I got a call and no delivery had been made, so I pulled up the tracking information. Well, it looks as though the package was damaged in transit. Because of this, the package was delayed for a day and now it isn't showing delivery until 12/27.
I called UPS and the customer service person said that it won't be delivered tomorrow because **I didn't buy Saturday delivery service**. I kindly explained that it wasn't my issue the package was delayed, and that it would seem like a reasonable thing to add Saturday delivery to the package to make sure it gets there on time. Nope. Apparently **they can't do that**. As I understand it, UPS uses a lot of computers and scanners to push packages around... I just don't understand why this can't be flagged in the computer.
Am I being told a bunch of bullshit here? Has anyone worked there who knows if there is something they can do to get my package there on time? | UPS damaged my package; Now the Christmas gifts I sent won't be there until Tuesday. |
t3_3c54b7 | relationships | My long distance Bf is ignoring me for a game | Let me start off by saying my boyfriend[28M] and I[31F] are both big gamers. We were friends for years before we started dating and a lot of that friendship revolves around the fact that we share a ton of the same hobbies. I live in another state and am planning on moving to be with him. We used to play things together constantly. However recently he got a next gen console and I still have my old one so we haven't been.
He's been under a lot of stress lately both from work and his uncle who he was close to just passed away. We still talk daily but it's dropped from skyping or talking on the phone for about an hour most days down to maybe 5-10 minutes.
I'm absolutely OK with him having "me" time and I know after work he needs to unwind. However since it's long distance talking is all we have except for once a month when we get to see each other. So I'm feeling a bit neglected.
I'm looking for jobs and getting things together so I can make this move. And it worries me that he'd rather play games than talk to me. Whenever I've tried to mention it he basically says he's exhausted from work (he works outdoors and with the heat he's usually wiped out after work) and tells me thanks for letting him nerd out.
Am I overreacting or could there be a underlying issue here? I've been burned so badly in the past I'm scared of moving if he's somehow losing his feelings for me | boyfriend would rather play Xbox than talk to his long distance gf |
t3_1k6054 | self | I have direct access to the team that will be 'Re-branding' the Republican party. partisan views aside -- what would you do to help get the Republican party on the right track (whatever 'right' is) for the betterment ALL of us, living in the United States) | So I have the unique opportunity to be very close to someone who has been asked to help re-brand the republican party. This isn't just a small tweak, but rather a broad-stroke effort to help define what the Republican party stands for - both the values they espouse now, and also their future policies and platform. This re-branding will help determine what the Republican party stands for, and the politicians both in the party now and future politicians will be creating their platforms based, in large measure, by the direction of this re-branding.
I am not partisan myself (slightly liberal in my political views but not a libertarian), but I have the unique opportunity to help influence the discussion/questions/structure of how the Republican party will be seen from without, and how the leadership will conduct themselves from within.
So I am posting this to ask you to help me in providing ideas/thoughts/opinions etc. in what you would do to make the Republican party a BETTER party for all of us (not just in how it is branded or seen from the outside, but the granular pieces that make up what a party represents to benefit us as a nation, not just to benefit the party itself).
I will have a direct line to the individual (and respective team) that is being asked to lead this directive, so your input is not only highly valued and appreciated, but could be used to help make our country better irrespective of your political leanings.
I hope that you contribute, this is the first time I've done anything like this, but given the gravity and ramifications of this, I passsionately feel that your contributions will help better inform me, which can be passed off to the lead in this endeavor. | the Republican party is going to be re-branded (with half a Billion dollars at their disposal), and I have the ear of someone who is leading this directive. I'm non-partisan, but I want the party to change for the better of all Americans (regardless of political leanings), so I would love to hear from the whole political spectrum of what changes you would like to see from the Republican party - from broad stroke changes, to detailed and relevant minutiae. |
t3_4slq5l | relationships | My [17M] girlfriend [18F] is moving to university soon and I need some advice for maintaining the relationship | So basically my girlfriend is moving to university soon. We've been together for 6 months and we have both said that we really want to keep the relationship going while she's at uni. It'll be about an hour on the train between us so it's not too much but we don't know how often we will be able to see each other because she knows nothing about her schedule yet. I'm looking for ways that I can keep the relationship healthy while possibly not being able to see her as often as I can now. Any advice is very much appreciated! | Girlfriend of 6 months is moving to uni and we want to keep the relationship. Looking for ways I can keep the relationship healthy and show her I love her. |
t3_2ia5xy | tifu | TIFU By not eating dinner. | I recently visited the (in)famous Oktoberfest in Munich Germany. I am studying abroad in Vienna so we took a party train from Vienna to Munich where there was an open bar that was very well stocked. I slept very little. Once there I had an apple and a pastry as a nice light breakfast and then the festivities started. With my trip I was given 2 vouchers for a Liter of beer and 1 voucher for half of a chicken at lunchtime (Noon-1 pm). Before leaving Oktoberfest (around 8 pm) I had 2 more liters of beer. Then once on the train back to Vienna I had more of something but I'm not sure what...
My dinner was a few Pringles.
Fast forward to the last 12-18 hours back in Vienna and I have been trying every possible hangover cure suggestion but eating and drinking is very hard when your whole body hates you.
Lesson here is to know your limits and be aware of your eating/drinking habits. Because fuck I'm impressed I could type this. Also, it was an incredible experience to be at Oktoberfest I just wish I had planned better. | Went to Oktoberfest and ate very little while drinking a lot and now I'm praying to Bloody Mary full of Vodka that the hour of my death will be soon. |
t3_scrmh | relationship_advice | Most confusing guy ever... | So I meet this guy back in late January. He is in his early 30's, has a good job, seems like a nice guy, isn't too shy when he is out amongst people. And I don't ever see him with other girls.
We hung out a bit. Not over doing it. Once a week maybe. Sometimes after a week or so. After a couple months we ended up doing it *bow chicka wow wow*. Right off the bat he was like...you should stay. I can't. I have kids and I get out a lot but I have to be home at the end of the night.
A few times after that we went to a couple rock shows together, hung out at the bar. And over the last couple months I've gone to his house a couple times. And every time he wants me to stay, tells me he wants me to come over more, wants to hang out more...but then here is the deal.
We make plans to go do things...and 1/2 the time there is an excuse as to why he can't go out. He says, "Get a hold of me tomorrow," and then all of a sudden he is sick. I even got ditched on Valentine's Day because his dad was in the hospital in a different state.
He'll never say...Why don't you come over. He just got back from vacation the night before and I invited myself over which I don't like to do and he said come over...but typically this isn't my style. Is this guy got some weird dick propaganda or does he want me to invite myself over?
It's fucking with me. Like what the hell do you want? You tell me you want to see me more but then there is always an excuse as to why he can't do something and doesn't invite me over. | Guy says he wants to hang out more but always has an excuse as to why he can't. |
t3_414kli | relationships | I [30F] feel very annoyed with my [31M] freind because he won't stop bragging and reporting on his life/job. Is the problem with me or him? | My really good friend, since university, is really braggy. He has always been like that to some extent and I usually just accept it as part of his personality but for the past two years I just find myself getting annoyed and trying to poke holes in his over exagerated stories. I smile and nod and give flat feedback like "Thats' awesome!; Cool!; You are so lucky!" but then I end up feeling like shit after. He has an okay job and I don't consider his accomplishments that special. I just feel drained by having to listen and fake enthusiasam. | Fried brags non stop and I am beginning to hate him for it. |
t3_u0qaw | AskReddit | Was Scammed On A Game, Whats Your Worst "I Was Scammed Stories"? | Nothing to big I guess, but I was playing Team Fortress 2. A very addicting FPS cartoonish fun game with a lot of unique features and stuff to do in it.
For anyone who plays Team Fortess, I got the "Unusual Flamboyant Flamenco" hat with the "Smoke Effect". One of my buddies I have been playing with for awhile said he would trade me 5 strange weapons, 10 keys, and 5 hats. I thought that was a solid deal right?
NOT... Little did I know its one of the rarest hats with the best effect, I could have gotten 3-4 buds. I know its virtual but I'm a little bummed out, and everyone who saw it started giving me stuff cause they completely saw how bad I was pretty much scammed.
I still am saddened it had to happen, but shit happens I guess. | I got scammed on a virtual game, which could result in real money lost. But in the end was just completely fucked over. |
t3_r8mmh | AskReddit | What are some television plot holes or continuity errors that bother you till this day? | So my friend emailed me this today which got me thinking about what are other ill written story lines that have been made:
My friend Daniel's email:
"I was watching Saved By The Bell as I'm getting dressed and this is too weird to not say anything.
Scenario:
Zach and Kelly are going to the dance dressed as Romeo and Juliet. It is Monday and the dance is on Saturday. Kelly can't buy the dress cause her parents have so many other kids (which doesn't seem to stop them from buying her other nice clothes). SO, she says she'll get a job at the Max to pay for the dress (even if she gets hired THAT VERY DAY, there's no way that 4 days of work will get her enough money to buy the dress.) OK OK, I know, but she could make good tips - it still takes 2 weeks just to get the first paycheck! OK - so that aside, assuming that she gets hired and makes enough money in those few days, AND gets paid immediately, Zach shows up at her house one night (when she's not working) and surprises her by giving her the dress that he bought with his own money. Then - THEN - she tells Zach she can't goto the dance on Saturday night because she has to work. WHY? WHY CAN SHE NOT GOTO THE DANCE??? SHE GOT THE DAMN JOB BECAUSE SHE NEEDED A DRESS FOR THE DANCE!!! HE EVEN BOUGHT THE SHIT DRESS FOR HER AND SHE STILL WON'T GO?!? THE WHOLE REASON SHE WENT TO WORK WAS TO GET MONEY TO BUY THE DRESS?! HOW MANY OUNCES OF DRO WAS THE WRITER ON NOT TO REALIZE THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE?!" | Kelly gets a job to afford a dress for the dance, tells Zach she cant attend the dance because she has to work. |
t3_16yl0c | relationships | Unknown half sister[24 possibly] that I[14] have just been told about, never expected this from my dad[46] | Yesterday I got in some trouble with my parents, I was on the phone with my gf[14] and we were talking and I believed I was home alone as i had just got home and one of the cars was gone, long story short my dad was home and he listened to our convo and i was being stupidly vulgar and inapropriate, and talking sexually, jokingly but still not apropriate, and so my dad finally comes down and is very angered and tells my mom to come home. I get yelled at, which i deserved, and am not upset about that, but the stupid sexual talk bothered my dad, I was basically just sarcastically talking about sexual things, and it worried him, and he didnt want me to take it as a joke, so he told me that sexuality is serious and wanted me to get that.
He continued and told me that he has a daughter he has never met, she was born in '89 and was concieved when he was drunk on an accident one night, with Im assuming to be a one night stand, and I know have a half sister that him and I have never met because the mother had moved away, and he has payed 100,000 dollars in child support. I feel horrible, mostly because of how unexpected this is, my dad is far from perfected but he is no stupid person, he is really smart and respectable and a great role model.
Knowing that he has a daughter he has never met kind of hurts me, he said I am able to ask questions but I have just kept to my self and kept quiet. What should I do? Thinking of him makes me uneasy now, I know it was a mistake, and we all have mistakes but it still hurts.
[ | ] Just found out about a half sister that was an accident when my dad was young, and I am not sure how to react to this suprising news and it is consuming me. |
t3_k6vkb | dating_advice | Need advice: Very new to this dating/relationship scene (20/M) | Last weekend a friend of mine from high school invited herself over to just chill. We played video games, card games, lateral thinking puzzles and I even played her a few songs I know on the guitar. We sort of hit off and I knew she said she was having a good time. She also met several of my housemates. Some housemates sort of played around with her assuming we were a couple telling jokes about the situation which she thought was funny. I then invited her to a party I was going to that she just happened to live near where we talked a little more. Unfortunately my ride left me there with her and she suggested that I sleep over, in which I did. We layed down on her bed together and watched a movie. But I didn't really doing anything like a make a move or whatever. We just ended up talking some more and she eventually fell alseep. The next day we ended up studying with friend of mine and then went to another party. The following day she came over my house to do some homework but ended up not doing it and watching some youtube videos instead.
So basically this entire labor day weekend we hung out. I suggested that we have lunch sometime this week so I'll have to see how that goes. I guess the thing I want to know is if I'm doing this right, because I have never hung out with a girl like this before. It's my first time talking and hanging out with a girl this much so I'm just looking for some insight. I'm showing interest in her but only slightly by giving her complements once in a while but as of now we are just talking like friends. That's why I invited her to get some lunch with me so we can talk more and get to know each other better. She is a really cool and beautiful girl. | Started hanging out and talking with a girl and just want to know if I should keep a slow pace of getting to know her better. |
t3_3d7wdj | relationships | Me [27M] with girl [27F] I have been seeing for almost a month, confused with where we stand, fear that she might be emotionally un-avaliable/incompatible | I started dating this girl about a month ago. Throughout this month, several things have stood out. Firstly, we don't really talk over the phone/text that often. Secondly, she likes to shit-test me very often. Specifically, she would asked me " Do you miss me?," and never answering that question herself. Or she would ask me if I could bring her younger brother out clubbing to meet girls. Needless to say, I've sidestepped these questions by basically not dignifying them with answers.
I am verbally, and physically affirming to her. She on the other hand, would reciprocate one moment only to play hard to get in the next. This is very frustrating and I have stated that to her on more than one occasion.
Last Sunday evening was a perfect example. We had a great dinner and she was supposed to meet up with one of her best friends after that. Her friend had to cancel due to her feeling unwell and suggested my date hung out with me instead. Over text, her friend referred to me as my date's "friend."
I didn't say anything about that, as we haven't had the 'exclusivity talk' yet. We ended up watching a movie and we were cuddling the whole time, out of her own initiative. I thought that finally broke the intimacy barrier we've had(she is usually much more touchy and open after a drink; she's a pretty stiff person normally). Unfortunately, our weekday routine of sparse conversation continues.
I am confused. Is she just emotionally not available? If so, why would she want to make holiday plans with me alone? And why bother going on these dates in the first place? I have a feeling that if this drags on for too long, it could become a " friends with benefits" situation, and I am definitely not cool with that. I have always been a relationship kind of person; a FWB relationship is just emotionally toxic for me from my one experience before. How do I communicate to her what I want at this juncture, or should I do so in the first place? | been seeing a girl for about a month/confused and not sure if she is emotionally available. I want to take what we have to the next level. What are your thoughts? |
t3_2wwa6k | relationships | I'm[26 M] interested in my friend of about a week [25 F] that has suffered from sexual abuse. | No too long ago I met a girl on OKCcupid. Things are going pretty well and we've had a lot of fun talking to each other, but I'm a concerned because she's suffered from a very long history of abuse. Without going too far into detail, she was exploited as a child, and very recently she finalized a divorce with her husband of seven years (he was an abusive tool). As a result of all of this she's very sensitive to anything sexual in entertainment (movies, books, etc.) and she's, understandably, very cautious.
That said, she's going through therapy and she seems to be adjusting well. Additionally, we've been getting along pretty well and both of us enjoy talking to each other. I'm wondering if anyone in r/relationships has experienced anything similar. I understand that dating an individual with that much history isn't always going to be easy, but right now I'm willing to take things slowly and see where they lead. | I'm interested in a girl that has suffered significant amounts of abuse and I'm looking for advice, particularly from people who have dated abused individuals. |
t3_4t6e6k | tifu | TIFU by slamming a fridge door into my head | In my house we keep most of our food in a large fridge-freezer. It's approximately 2 meters in height, with the fridge part taking up about 2/3 of the unit. About 20 minutes ago, my parents went out, leaving 15 y/o me in charge of the house and my two brothers. As he left, my dad mentioned that we had some screwball ice cream in, and as I was really in the mood for one I went for the freezer. I grabbed the handle without looking and yanked a door open. Remember, this is not THE door; just A door...
Now, as the handle is about three feet off the ground, (almost) 6'0 me had to bend down and, as a result, my vision went to the floor and my long fringe blocked my view of where my hand was going. The fridge door handle is only about an inch above the freezer handle and feels exactly the same, so without thinking I grabbed the FRIDGE door, which was right in front of my head.
As the freezer door sometimes gets frozen up, I opened it really hard and, as a result smashed the massive door into my head with cranium-shaking force, knocking the seven bells out of me. Also, the fact that the door was covered with shelves of loose jars made a DEAFENING noise. The combined impact of the door and noise of the jars made me collapse to the floor, disoriented and in shock. Everyone laughed at my magnificent incompetence, and I felt utterly stupid, but at least I got a some tasty ice cream and bubblegum out of it. | Accidentally grabbed the wrong door handle, which led to me destroying my senses and dignity in an instant. I am not a smart man. |
t3_136w6z | AskReddit | Dear Reddit, what was the very FIRST date you ever went on? | Inspired by the awesome dating tragedies over at [this kickass post.] -- I went to share mine there, but then I thought it might be fun to hear all about everyone's FIRST date, good, bad or whatever. :)
~~~
I was 14 and a serious tomboy and big time nerd. When a super cute (and equally nerdy!) boy from another school asked me out, I was SO EXCITED. I'd never been on an actual date before. I had, however, watched A LOT of television and movies. In my head, I was expecting him to show up in a tuxedo, bouquet of flowers in hand -- like every boy does in every sitcom when going on Their First Date. I knew we were going to a movie, but I didn't know what else he had planned. Dinner? DANCING? I really let myself run with it, waiting for Friday.
The doorbell rang. I answered the door. And there he was -- in a gold lamé bustier, lacy black bra, high heels and full make-up.
O_O ....
He had neglected to say that the movie we were going to was "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" -- which I'm not sure would have prepared me, since I didn't know what that was at the time.
Out of everything I was expecting, answering the door to my 15 year old date in full lingerie drag was NOT one of them. His mom drove us all the way across town to the show. I remember sitting in the back of the car feeling a weird mix of emotions: disappointment due to my ridiculously high expectations, utter confusion, and feeling a little strange because I could see every inch of his hairy legs all the way up to his crotch.
I ended up having a great time, but we only dated for a few weeks. A few years later he came out to everyone, I wasn't even a little surprised. | Got asked to the movies for my first date, opened the door to find him in full lingerie and high heels. |
t3_jtkbx | relationships | Please Help - Pursue or not? | First, Some background info:
I work for a corporation, I am 19. I have a mid level management job, and I just got an intern, who reports to both me and my supervisor, one of the directors.
The intern is a daughter of one of the directors.
Her internship lasted a month, and I grew to like her quiet a bit, and I can tell she has a thing for me too, we flirt and touch a little here and there, send each other secret emails and share jokes, lunches, etc.
She goes back to school, a 3 hour drive away, in a week, and then the chances of me ever seeing her get very low, unless I ask her out, however I am holding back because:
A relationship with a full time college student, while I am working and going to school full time can be tricky as it is, but with the distance gap it might be impossible.
Her father plays a very high role in the company and it would be rather unprofessional.
It is unprofessional to date co-workers, and if it gets out it could be damaging to my career.
So...what would you guys do? How do i proceed? | Read it, its not too long.* |
t3_ncwfj | AskReddit | What's the closest you've come to dying? | I was snorkeling in Palau looking at a shipwreck when my little brother and I decided to dive down and check it out. It was about 30 feet deep and we went to the bottom, and my brother ran out of air sooner than I had so he shot up to the surface but when he kicked off he lost his flipper. Thinking, I'll have to come back to get it, I may as well dive down and get it now. While thinking this I was running out of air so I kicked down to the bottom and started my ascent, when I found myself gasping for air. I was about halfway up and I couldn't handle it anymore so overdrive kicked in and I kicked harder than I ever have before, but it wasn't enough. About 2 feet below the surface my body naturally opened my mouth to gasp for air and I got a mouth full of water, when I finally reached the surface I coughed like a motherfucker and survived to tell the tale. But the fear I was experiencing was cray. | almost drowned while snorkeling |
t3_2tbflg | legaladvice | First car accident in Medina County, Ohio | Yesterday after having my license for about a year and two months I was in my first car accident. I rear ended a lady after my foot slipped off the brake due to a chunk of snow still stuck to the bottom of my shoe. I am insured, I put in the accident report that my foot had slipped and by the time I could recover it was too late and impact was made. Her back bumper was pretty smashed in while the grill of my car was damaged, my hood was crunched up a bit and my drivers side door won't open more than 4 inches.
The officer told me that I can waive the citation since no one was injured. My question is basically what are the pros and cons of waiving the ticket versus going to the court date? Is there anything else I should be thinking about? Is there any action the woman could take against me? My grandfather is helping deal with all of my insurance stuff but I can get very paranoid and neurotic and thought this sub would help with clearing up a lot of the stuff I've been worrying about. | First accident, I'm at fault and no one is hurt. I'm insured but really paranoid, tell me what to worry about. |
t3_45iabb | offmychest | I am tired of my parents ignoring me even on my birthday. I am going to run away. | Okay... my birthday was yesterday and my family bought me a watch. It is a $50 watch from Koots. At first I told them I liked it to not hurt their feelings, but I never wanted it. I'm not going to use a watch. So I asked them to return it and keep the money. But they refuse to return the watch. It's not even a fashionable watch! They say that you can't return presents but this watch can CERTAINLY be returned. I want to return this watch at all costs. I will threaten to run away from home if they do not return this watch.
Also: I am grateful that they bought me the watch, but the money could be better spent on other things. They should keep it rather than giving me a watch. I did not ask for a watch for my birthday - I said I did not want anything and I still had to wake up to a hundred dollars in bad gifts. | This watch is the worst thing that has happened to me all year! |
t3_2ssfde | relationships | Me [25/M] wondering if I should show my jealous girlfriend some texts I have received from a drunk girl. | Long story short,
I am working the graveyard shift at work. It's a hotel situated in the middle of the city. Due to it being weekend I see a lot of drunk people passing by (huge window, everyone can see me, it's like a damn aquarium)
3 girls just walked in, completely drunk and demanded my number and refused to leave until I gave it, even sent a confirmation text to see if it's the legit number.
Now to me, this is hilarious and I want to show the texts they have sent me, however my girlfriend is quite the jealous type.
I want to show it though but I am afraid it will turn into a useless discussion/"fight" that can easily be avoided. | 3 drunk girls walked into my work, demanded my phone number, have sent a few texts to me (that are hilarious). Show the girlfriend (who is jealous) or not? |
t3_22komh | relationships | I [F27] snooped through my boyfriend's [M27] phone. Now I'm worried about his health. Should I tell him what I did? | I know what I did was wrong, so please, don't nail me to the cross here. I'm looking for genuine advice. Me [F27], him [M27], one year+ relationship.
Tonight, my boyfriend came over for dinner after work and we hung out for awhile. When he went home, I realized he forgot his phone at my place. I fully admit, I'm a very snoopy girlfriend. So when I found his phone on the couch, I couldn't help myself. Honestly, I just wanted to know if he ever talked about me to his friends/family.
When I was snooping, I found a couple of texts to his buddy, which really concerned me. This is what they said:
**Boyfriend:** No. I've got some serious chest pains.
**Friend:** Since when? Does it happen a lot?
**Boyfriend:** Since last week. Yeah, it's been happening a lot lately.
**Friend:** Dude, that's scary shit.
**Boyfriend:** Tell me about it, makes it hard to breathe. I almost passed out this morning.
**Friend:** You need to tell _____ (me). She's a nurse.
**Boyfriend:** Hell no. Don't say anything to her.
**Friend:** Fine. It will probably go away anyway.
So, now I'm in a really bad situation because I'm WORRIED about him. He needs to see a doctor, but now he'll know I snooped through his phone. I won't see him until tomorrow. Do you think I should take his phone to his place, so I can talk to him face to face about this? What do I say? Do you think he'll be mad? | I need to talk to my boyfriend about some things I found in his phone while snooping. |
t3_4nu22u | relationships | I [18F] really like my bestfriend [19M]. But so does my friend / roommate [19F] | Okay so I've known my bestfriend Chris* for years. In around November/ December we became good friends who always hungout and texted. I always had a little crush on him but never told anyone about it because i felt dumb about it.
It went like that for months. Until he met my friend Casy* [19F] who I've known my whole life and she told me she liked him.
I was pissed but let it go.
Now shes VERY into him and is very delusional to the fact that he doesnt like her. He hangs out with us everyday and its very noticable that he doesnt like her.
I think he might like me though... We text alllll day and snapchat and we always hangout and hes so open with me and we just click so much.
I also met his older sisterlast night and she made the comment ' she knew aloooooooot" . ( not in a bitchy way though, were actually really good friends now!!!
Anyways, what the hell do i do?? | I really like my boy bestfriend but when i introduced him to my friend that i live with, she said she likes him. alot. |
t3_ma8cx | AskReddit | What was your first time like? | I'm a 23 year old guy and I nearly just took the virginity of a 25 year old girl. We're getting into it at the club, and I notice she kisses like a 16 year old. We go back to my place and get nakey and I notice she's really REALLY tight. Like I can't even get my finger in there. "Are you a virgin?" I ask. "It's been a long time," she says. "Actually I am," she says later. A minute later she throws up on my floor and runs to the bathroom naked. She's throwing up and coughing in there, the landlord is in the room down the hall. He comes out and says, "Is there a cat retching or something?". "No," I say, as he walks towards the bathroom. He opens the door before I can do or say anything and sees her naked and throwing up into his pristine toilet. "There's a naked girl in there," he says and walks back to his room. She decides she had better go (I completely agree) and I call her a cab. The landlord and I laughed about it later, with of course a stern warning about inviting people into the house without asking. | Girl comes home with me, she's a virgin, throws up in my room and gets me in trouble with my landlord. |
t3_3e2jjj | relationship_advice | I'm [21/m] and recently started developing feelings for my [20/f] best friend of 3 years. Having trouble deciding on what I should do. | Hey everyone, first time poster here. I met this girl through my friend in my freshman year of college and ever since then we have slowly over the past few years become best friends. We are very similar and have a lot of the same hobbies so getting along comes naturally for us. We talk almost everyday and are comfortable with each other to a point where we are very open and honest about things like our past/current relationships and things like that.
But over this summer we have gotten even closer and started hanging out even more. (Hanging out was hard for us earlier on because we both live/go to school almost 2 hours away from eachother and work/school full-time.) So over the past month I have started to develop strong feelings for her, rarely does she ever leave my mind and whenever we hang out it's the highlight of my week, leaving me looking forward to the next time I can see her.
Here's my issue, I don't know whether or not she is interested in me or would return these feelings that I have for her. I don't want to lose her as a friend or make things awkward to the point where we don't talk/hang out like we normally do. Her friendship is just that important to me. We have both always said that we are very honest with people when it comes to our intentions, so do I come clean with her and tell her how I feel or continue with what has been going on and just see if things develop? | I have feelings for my best friend but I don't want to ruin our friendship, plis help. |
t3_2ssnmw | tifu | TIFU by using my shopvac | So as with most tifu this happened about 6 weeks ago,but I am now just feeling the effects of this fuck up. So I am married with a wonderful 5y/o daughter....let's call her Athena. So one night Athena is with my inlaws having dinner at the local restaurant. All seems to go well and Athena is dropped back at my home. Now a little backstory....Athena has epilepsy and constipation issues...so naturally she is on multiple meds. When Athena is with said inlaws she doesn't get her meds until she gets home, which is normally past her bedtime. She is in full day kindergarten. So I administer said meds in an oral fashion quite quickly. Here is where the fuck up occurs. Athena sucks down her 5ml each of 2 meds and her 12 ounce of third med. wait 3-5 minutes after ingestion and projectile vomits occurs. Contents include but are not limited to the salad bar. Pretty much enough said on that. I being all testosterone based choose a shopvac as my tool of choice to clean it off my carpet. Cleanup goes well. Fast forward to tonight. Decide to use my shopvac and it turns out the hose is clogged. With what you may ask?? Dryed up salad bar/medicine puke. I now have to figure out how to clean the hose. Welcome to my life at 8:15 Saturday night. | kid pukes. I clean with shopvac. 6wks Later cleaning dry moldy puke out of shopvac hose. |
t3_2tznt1 | relationships | Me [17 M] with my friend [17 F] , one thing she done that confuse me . | I know her for 3 years we are from same class, i was always in good relationship with her but sadly i think im not pretty enough to be her boyfriend so i never tried , last 2 weeks we are in fight or at least i am in fight with myself, while i was returning from school it was dark street like from movies, me her and her boyfriend, she saw me and she kissed him like i didnt show i just smiled, but i was jealous as hell and it hurt me a lot, my problem why would she ever do such thing, i was sadly asshole to her last few days, all i wanted is her attention but i dont know she changed or i at least changed, ya like i dont even have a question or why im writting this but i guess i dont have anyone else to tell and maybe some find it interesting lol. Hope at least 1 in 1000 will understand my english :D | typical teenage love problems lol. |
t3_2o7hzu | relationships | I'm sure this has been beaten to death but - My [23 M] Long Distance Girlfriend [23 F] of 6 months is still friends with her ex (BF and best friend) and it is making me uncomfortable. | I met my girlfriend this summer and she is now away for school. She dated this gentleman for a year and that ended in April-May (They were best friends beforehand).
She has explained that the two are not enemies (which is fine) and still remain semi close. In the past he has sent her some worrying emails regarding himself (mental health) and his mother has gone through some health problems and he wrote my SO a long email, basically using her as an emotional crutch.
She has been honest and open with me about their relationship and assured me she feels nothing romantic towards him and has also stated that if I ever felt uncomfortable with their relatonship that she would end it.
He posted on her facebook wall about a new TV season of the show they used to watch and she responded that she was excited and they had to watch it. This is what leads me to my question(s)
1. How do I approach this topic over skype the phone or should I wait till we are in person (less than 2 weeks)?
2. I don't want to control who she hangs out, but their relationship makes me uncomfortable, despite the fact this guy seems pretty ok.What steps could I take to be ok with this?
I trust her, but past experiences have shown she is slightly oblivious to when men are hitting on her.
3. Everyone is different, but do you think there is a chance that she would resent me for communicating this to her as she has offered to "end" their relationship? | Long Distance GF is still close with ex Boyfriend and close friend, how do I learn to be ok with this? / What would be the most tactful way to tell her it makes me uncomfortable to think about them hanging out? |
t3_40sor8 | relationships | I [18M] am constantly seeing my ex [18F] with her new boyfriend and it's killing me | So me and my girlfriend were together for a year and a half and it ended last November on the 8th.
I truly did love her, we were each other's firsts and we were very very happy together.
It ended because I especially stupid and didn't tell her some stuff from my past so when she found out this stuff she had trouble trusting me so it had to end.
I found out she was in a new relationship about a month after we finished, and now it's killing me. I constantly am seeing them together around my college and they're frequently leaving school together to go round each other's house etc.
The hardest part is seeing them like that, doing what we did and the other guy getting to do the things I'do kill to do (not literally).
I've tried speaking to other people but I'm not that interested in anyone else, I can't seem to get interested in anyone else. It's causing me to feel down and tired almost all the time and it's affecting my college work.
I just need to get out of this chasm and I'm hoping people have some advice. | I'm having trouble seeing my ex with her new boyfriend |
t3_wez53 | AskReddit | I'm at the hospital waiting for my baby boy to come out of his personal Jacuzzi, any suggestions to pass the time? | I've been here since 5:00 in the morning, tried to get the local newspapers, People magazine, etc. so when my son is born, he has an idea what life was like "back in the day." I was also able to get some screen-shots of the news on Yahoo!, CNN, ABC, etc. and wish there was an easier way for that, but I've had 12+ hours so it's not horrible.
I just need something to do for the next 12 or so while she's sleeping (epidural) to be productive or even just take my mind off everything. Any help would be awesome. | I need more shit to do in this hospital. |
t3_3bse1j | relationships | Me (22M) in a relationship with my gf (22F) for just over a month. I'm concerned that she's not as social as me, settled with her job and isn't undertaking study or as ambitious as me. | I've been seeing my gf for about a month and have been officially together for just over a month. Something just drew me to her, I'm attracted to her but she isn't as social as I am on an individual or group basis. When we first started dating she was quiet, didn't start conversations and kept to herself or on her phone. She's improved now where she's herself around me, she starts conversations, she's more cheeky and opinionated, makes me laugh etc. She comes from a good family, everyone is nice and easy going and I'm her 2nd serious relationship. My family also likes her even though she seems a bit quiet and reserved (this has improved though.)
Whilst this isn't the main concern, my concern is that she isn't as ambitious as me and she is stuck in a dead end job working at a retail pharmacy settling in life. She has the 'can't be bothered' attitude to work which makes me sick because I believe everyone has a choice and that she can do whatever she truly wants to do in life and in a relationship you should be inspired by your partner. Me on the otherhand, I have a Business degree with two majors and am currently studying a postgraduate Master's degree in International Business. On top of this, I DJ on the weekends and am planning to invest into the nightclub scene and run my own nights as well as other types of investments and business. I also have interests in a lot of other fields. Basically, I don't want to settle and have high ambitions.
This is not taking away that she's a good girl, she cares for me, puts me first and treats me well. We get along good. I am a bit turned off that she doesn't study at University and is 'content' with her job and doesn't know otherwise. | What do I do? I really like the girl, but in the back of my mind something is telling me to be careful. Am I settling? |
t3_4071j3 | tifu | TIFU By driving drunk again... Again | Not me but my best friend / roommate...
Mohammed this is your 3rd dui... You had less than 2 weeks left on your probation and you went out and celebrated. I get it.. Whoo hoo freedom, yo! But yeah, you're an idiot bro. You totalled your truck, took out a brick mailbox, a street sign, and hit every curb through the neighborhood... I am assuming you were trying to limp the truck to your sisters house...
I still don't see how you did not hit any vehicles parked on the street... We can see the drag marks and follow your path of drunkenness... Thank God no one was hurt.
I love ya bro.. I'll come during visiting hours tomorrow and give ya some window love... For the third fucking time.
Hopefully we will see you on the outside in less than 10 years. | don't drink and drive, kids... Call a fucking Uber |
t3_18fhu6 | relationships | Update - I[23F and 25m] know I need to cut off a toxic friend but am worried because of his severe mental illness. Help!!! [11+yrs] | Hi
For the bot
So I told him we cannot be friends, that I'm done trying. I removed him from facebook and blocked him on aim. I'm so done and thought you guys might want to know what sent me over the edge.
***
From my last post I got great advice and my friends also read the post too. The plan was to send him books thst helped me (specifically the Quran) and slowly let the friendship become some talking few times a year. Be less involved yet still be active. So, I am talking to him tonight and he refuses to give me his address. He said he can read the books online and for me to buy something else using the 5 $ shipping fee. I resign and say I'll send it to his grad school, which he oobjects to (btw book package has academia in there as well since I'm a student. Not just theology so makes sense to be send to his mailbox at school).
I proceed to change the topic and ask him how school is going. I say well at least you're fully funded-- and it turns out he wasnt. He will be 100k in debt he says but no prob, won't make me homeless. I telll him I'm shocked and how ffiends in similar programs to his are funded. Well now he says he actually won't be in debt that hign. He just said an absurb number because I talk about school too much. I'm now pissed. My so called friend won't give me his address to send a book and lies to me for fun?!? I cant help such a dishonest person so I tell him I'm dons with him.
So this is bulllshit. Ill still send him the books, they are extras anyway,with a note saying I hope his health improves but that is all. Is thst good? | Friend refuses to give me an address to send books and proceedz to lie for fun. I'm sick of trying. I'm gunna be sending him the books to his grad school but beyond that all contact is lost. Good idea? |
t3_1qifxp | tifu | TIFU by accidentally posting one of my gonewild pictures as my facebook profile picture | So I was trying to change my profile picture and to the one I wanted, and I had to move the file to a separate folder. I was stupid though, and I didn't look at it before clicking the picture. It was IMMEDIATELY set as my profile picture and there I am turned around with a nice pussy shot for all of my friends and family to see. It took a moment to process what I had done and I scattered to delete the picture. BUT IT WAS STILL ON MY WALL. oh my god oh my god oh my god. Too late, my cousins friend commented on it, "what the fuck". One person had already seen it. God damn it. Luckily I was able to delete it in about 10 seconds, so it only appeared on peoples news feeds for that long. The only two people I know of that saw it were my cousin and his friend, but it's not like I have to worry about them blackmailing me. Still, it's an awkward moment when your cousin sees you in a doggy style position. The first guy to comment on the picture messaged me with, "so I'm assuming we're best friends now." | It's not that long, just fucking read it. |
t3_2zr2mx | tifu | TIFU By reading TIFU in the emergency room. | Happened about fifteen minutes ago. So I'm here sitting in the ER visiting grandma (fell and busted her shoulder) and at that time decided that it would be a good idea to browse some funny stories on reddit, to y'know keep me entertained and pass the time. So I'm reading the top story in this sub (Facebook stalker McCringester) and I start chuckling, and a grin stretches across my face as I get to the end of the story. Then as soon as I read the comments about how much it made people cringe, I couldn't hold it in. I let it all out, a full on "HAHAHAHAHA!" The worst part is during my 5 seconds of laughter a girl emerges from behind the automatic door, it was if she had Niagara falls x2 for eyes. I heard the tears come crashing down her face but something inside me said I should turn and look at her with a giant smile on my face. I think she lost faith in humanity today, and as for me, well...I'm gonna keep on reading. | laughed while reading reddit and made eye contact with sobbing girl. |
t3_2few60 | relationships | My brother [27 M] constantly invades my [20 F] personal space. | To make a long story short, my brother and I are two very different people. Just to give you the idea of what type of person he is, basically I don't agree with many of the life choices he makes and honestly feel that he isn't a very good person. I feel he is egotistical and self centered, a bad father, and honestly quite lazy. He is 27 and still living in the basement, no job, and puts all money he has towards his race car instead of his daughter. He is constantly teasing and antagonizing me. No matter how much I keep to myself he always feels the need to bother me in every situation. But the one that gets to me the most is the invasion of my personal space. Everytime he sees me he feels the need to touch me in some way. Whether it be poking, flicking, feeling the fabric of my clothing, smacking my butt (all common forms) he does something like this every time we see each other without fail. It drives me insane. If I try to tell him to stop he just laughs and thinks its funny. When it comes down to it honestly I believe it's some sort of subconscious assertion of dominance. They say when someone invades personal space its them trying to be powerful over you. Knowing this makes me even more crazy. What do I do? How should I approach this relationship. | Brother old enough to know better constantly antagonizes me and invades my personal space. |
t3_2wnnah | relationships | Me [26F] trying to end things with my FWB [22M] because feelings. | Hi folks. I'll try not to make this very long. I recently started hooking up with one of my classmates in a program of about 40 people. We've had sex a bunch in the last month, he's stayed over once, sometimes we watch movies and cuddle. I made it clear from the beginning I was looking for a casual thing, nothing serious, and he agreed.
The problem is, as these things often go, I have developed feelings for this guy. Which would be fine except I just got out of a long, shitty relationship and don't want a boyfriend for like at least a year, and I don't even know if the feelings are reciprocated.
The way I see it, the only thing to do is put the whole thing to a halt. Reasons being it's not fair to keep fucking someone you have feelings for in a FWB situation, and it's just opening myself up for getting hurt down the road.
My question for you guys is if I should tell him I'm peacing and give him my reasons or if I should just implement the slow fade. The former seems more like an adult thing to do, but opens up the floor for him to tell me about any feelings he might have, which would probably be bad for both of us. The latter option is just a dick move, IMO.
So...yeah any advice, anecdotes, etc. much appreciated. | Feelings for a FWB, how do I stop? |
t3_4qf2y9 | relationships | Me [27F], her [30F] coworker drama | I've been at my job for just over a month. This coworker is a bitch (and has been at the job for 3 years, longest out of the other employees at our level). During my first few weeks I made a handful of rookie mistakes (normal to being new to both a job and also the field in general) and instead of being helpful, she made these really mean underhanded comments, and has been rude in general. We're a small company (total of 10 people in the office) so there isn't really an HR to go to.
What's the fastest way I can shut her up the next time she comes over to my desk to complain that I'm doing something wrong?
There's a specific scenario that's been going on recently where there's an established way to do a thing but I've found a way that's easier and faster for me. She keeps hounding on me asking me why I don't do "what everyone else does" and "how it's always been done"
I need the job and the money, the job market isn't good enough for me to find other work easily, I'm hoping if I can get through this she'll eventually get bored and leave me alone.
But getting hounded like this day after day, even if it's just a brief interaction in the morning, is really dragging me down emotionally.
Help me figure out a way to deal with this, ideally something to respond that shuts down the conversation and makes her walk away. | shitty coworker, what can I say to shut her up? |
t3_2x9z16 | relationships | My [17M] girlfriend [17F] wants to sleep over at her male friend's house for his birthday. | So I've been best friends with this girl for about 4 years now and we started dating 9 months ago. It's been going great so far, no major problems, but today she told me her new-ish [18M] friend is having a few friends over for a birthday party, and they'd all be spending the night. Now, I've never met this guy OR any of the other guys attending, (she'd be the only girl), and this whole situation is making me extremely uncomfortable. She's reassured me that he hasn't tried anything, and if he did she would immediately leave for my house (I live a couple blocks away from him). I let her know how uncomfortable it made me feel, and her takeaway from it seems to be that I don't trust her and that her reassurances should be enough to put me at ease. So reddit, should I be worried? I don't think it's really my place to expressly forbid her from doing anything, but at this point should that be my next course of action? | My girlfriend wants to go to her male friend's birthday and sleep over, I am uncomfortable with this and have talked to her about it. What's my next course of action? |
t3_2y3r90 | relationships | My (28/f) boyfriend (30/M) of 3 years is a vapid misogynist. How do I cope or explain his opinion of women hurts my feelings? | My boyfriend is a very loving and caring man. He has his quirks, is newly discovered to have Aspergers and is admittedly a misogynist. He is cocky and his brilliance is a harm to others. To him all women are the same, including myself. We are evil creatures. Which deeply hurts me as I love him for his differences, he faults me for mine. He is one in a million to me and I feel like just another face in the crowd of second class citizens that live below his throne.
There are countless examples, side remarks, rude comments, etc etc. So much more than I can write. I am looking for a delicate, non defensive way to explain to him that these views and remarks hurt my feelings deeply, and that they make me feel like his reasonings for loving me for me are invalidated. Please be kind. | My (28/f) boyfriend (30/M) of 3 years is a vapid misogynist. How do I cope or explain his opinion of women hurts my feelings? |
t3_42qf0g | relationships | I'm 21(M) and one of my "bestfriends" is 22(F) I need some advice | Okay, My friend and I we have just started talking again after two years a huge fight. We did fool around we never had sex, but we did other things. She doesn't remember what the fight was about it had nothing to do with us fooling around. During that two years I moved out of state for school. Every time I go back to visit she is the first one to text me and ask me if I want to go out and get a drink. Since we've been talking again I realize I still have feelings for her, and she is aware of this.
I get the sense that she has feelings for me by a the settle signs. We had a whole talk about respecting our friendship. She has a new boyfriend, and they have been dating a few weeks. She has told me. She has told me she is having hard time opening up to him. We are best friends, and we've been talking for few months now we call, video call, and we text all the time. Also ask each other for advice all the time.
Recently, we been video calling each other to the point where one of fall asleep on each other. Then as a little prank we will screen shot each other sleeping, and message it. She's been mentioning lately that she wants to come up, and see me(I'm 3 hours away from her). Then some days she'll blow up my phone. She also gets mad if I don't say goodnight/bye, or message her back within like four to six hours. It's getting to the point where I want to be with her, or just stop talking to her but I don't want to be a bad friend. I also don't want to get in the middle of her new relationship. I am aware that I'm in the friend zone. (sorry for the bad grammar and punctuation) | We were friend had fight didn't talk for a while now talking again. We both have feeling for each other. Has fairly new bf. Talks about seeing me. I'm her best friend. I don't know what to do.... |
t3_3006ph | relationships | My [26 F] boyfriend [29 M] 'makes people insecure to get all the power'. Does he have some kind of mental problem? | I've been with my guy for around 6 months - he is a quiet, shy, computer programmer who is pretty awkward around women/kind of inexperienced. We've been having a lot of fun.
The other night we had a bit to drink and we were talking about our relationship pasts. Out of nowhere he told me that he 'makes people insecure to get all the power' in a relationship - these were his exact words. He told me an ex gf told him this about himself and it seems that he agrees.
This sounded extremely weird to me and I'm now wondering if I should nope the f*ck out of this relationship as it sounds like a massive red flag and like he has some kind of mental problems and or a propensity for emotional abuse. I've noticed that he is quite critical of me sometimes and takes forever to reply to my texts even though I've told him it really upsets me and I've sometimes suspected that its a way for him to maintain control, but now I'm really wondering. | My boyfriend told me he purposely makes his partners feel insecure. Should I be seriously worried? |
t3_2keh0m | AskDocs | 5yo boy suffers from massive b.m. that clog toilet every time | My brother is 5. Today he used the bathroom, clogged the toilet, it overflowed. He tried to use a plunger himself but only made more of a mess. He was embarrassed and didn't tell his mother and so she had a nice surprise. I remember changing him when he was in diapers, and he would frequently have baseball sized (and shaped) poops that were as hard as a rock. Flushing them would clog the toilet even then. I am posting this on behalf of my mother who wouldn't have any idea how to do this.
He refuses to eat anything besides meat and potatoes (if that) and occasionally some fruit. The best solution I can think of is to either MAKE him eat other foods too (I don't know if his mom has the strength to force him to do anything), or to give him some sort of fiber supplement. Maybe both. Is it safe for a 5 year old to take fiber pills? Is there some other solution we can't come up with? | my brother (5) has had hard, toilet clogging bowel movements his entire life. How can we alter the size and toughness of his poop? |
t3_1wpb1e | relationships | My [20F] SO [22M] just lost his job. I want to know how to help him and be supportive. | Hello there /r/Relationships! So, my SO and I have been together for two and a half years. We met in college our freshman year. This year, he wasn't able to attend school due to monetary issues. He managed to get a full time job, but was just laid off today. We do not currently live together (he's at home, I'm at college still), but he visits me frequently. We have a fantastic relationship, but I'm inexperienced with people losing their jobs and don't know how to be supportive and encouraging in this situation. I don't know what to say, if I should do anything, whether I should help him find a job, or stay out of it and let him figure it out.
I'm looking for help in order to be there for him. I want to know what to say, how to help him get through this time, and I just don't want to screw up. I know that if he isn't working, he won't be able to visit me very frequently and I completely understand that.
He is currently on his way over to my reshall so that he can spend the weekend here with our friends and hang out. He has an interview at a pizza place next week, but that won't pay for the student loans he's been paying off.
Has anyone else's partner lost their job? How did you cope? What resources (websites) are available to help him find a new position, and quickly?
Any feedback would be greatly appreciated. | SO was just laid off, and I'm looking for guidance in how to help him get through this situation. |
t3_2i9r0f | tifu | TIFU by doing an record-shatteringly pungent fart. | First off: I work in one of the few remaining Video rental shops - Yes, it's a blockbuster, and for all of you Americans are confused because they're closed, they ain't in Australia. God knows why not, they're just as empty here.
It being after 9:30 on a Saturday night, practically all humans were doing something better. Which meant whilst alphabetizing horror (the section in consistently worst order bar the children's area) I thought it would be pretty harmless to let one go, espescially after evacuating a couple of hours earlier.
To my surprise it was quite a bad one - the type an athletic jock would be proud of letting go in his frat dorm - but as there was no one in the store it was a victimless crime. Until a man whom I assumed was lost came into the store and stood right next to me in horror. He asked me where to find "The Number 23", and after a pause said "Is there something dead in the ceiling? That smell is amazing."
What I meant to say in reply was "Yes, with these recent storms, they've been displaced I guess, and when the boss had a look he said that unfortunately one got caught in some wiring." What I said was "Haha na, yeah, possums storm ya know."
He knew it was me. He left without The Number 23. | A massive fart from me jeopardized my one chance to make a sale on Saturday at Blockbuster. |
t3_1dpvx4 | self | I suck at friendship | My friends made plans without me. I got really lonely, upset, ashamed, mad, passive aggressive and sad.
I just want to rant. I transferred to a 4-year college in the fall from a community college and made a small group of transfer friends (since we had a full week of transfer orientation). They're starting to branch out and and push me out of the group. For a while now, I've known that most of my transfer friends have only been friends with me through my also transfer roommate, who is now avoiding me and not inviting me to group stuff that she always used to. She usually talks on the phone in the room and doesn't have the courtesy to step out. But recently when she's making plans with mutual friends, she'll step out so I don't hear what they're saying.
I'm also in varsity sports but I'm not close with my teammates that much. I posted on the team facebook group about hanging out to play cards, but no one responded. Feels shitty.
I'm starting to take it out on my boyfriend, who is amazing. He hung out with his friends last night and tonight. Normally I'm okay with us doing our own things. But I'm upset because of my friends. So I'm upset that he is hanging out with his friends than me, also because I'm going to move back home for the summer in a week. But I don't tell him that, because I don't want to be clingy. I feel so passive aggressive toward him. I turned off chat so he would stop chatting me and call or text me. Ugh, I'm so immature.
I also can't bring myself to tell him how much of a loner I am and that I have no real friends. I am afraid that would turn him off. I mean, wouldn't anyone be turned off if they know their partner doesn't have anything else to do by herself and just wants to hang out with you all the time? | My friends are not inviting me to have fun. I can't bring myself to invite myself. I take it out on bf who is doing nothing wrong. I'm disgusted with myself. |
t3_3joa9t | personalfinance | Is my buddy's plan really a "great investment?" | My friend has been irrationally exuberant lately, constantly saying he needs to buy a house. The market is kinda hot now, but wages are still stagnant so I tend to lean a little bearish on this economy until that changes.
Here's the #s
He makes around $85k/yr and has a company car. His fiancé is HORRIBLE with her money and recently told him (after 6 years dating plus 2.5 years of on/off engagement) that she had been hiding $75K in private student loans. She's a nurse and makes around $60K, and has $60k federal loans and $75k private. She can contribute $1k per month to the house.
They currently pay $1,400/mo rent for a nice 2bdrm with a little lake for the dog to fuck around. The house will close in a month with a VA loan with just my buddy's name on it for veteran reasons. Smart, because as an aside I think his fiancé is cheating on him.
The house will cost him $2,400/mo with taxes, on a THIRTY YEAR at 3.4%. My boss owns a wealth management firm and hates when I do this, but that's a total payout of $865,000. The house is like $285K, I don't feel like doing that math.
When I asked why he feels so compelled to by a house, he said because equity. Quote: "renting is NOT the way to go." However, he's also a known idiot.
Can we just look at what he stands to lose by not investing that extra $1,000 per month for the next 1-3 decades? The difference between his assumed equity and just putting his money in the DJIA? He doesn't understand simple shit like liquidity, and that trying to get money from your house is the opposite of deciding to sell off some bonds or stocks. | my friend is buying a house because it's what people do, but I'm not sure he's being wise with his monies |
Subsets and Splits
No saved queries yet
Save your SQL queries to embed, download, and access them later. Queries will appear here once saved.