id
stringlengths 8
9
| subreddit
stringclasses 29
values | title
stringlengths 1
300
| post
stringlengths 1
2.51k
| summary
stringlengths 0
1.79k
|
|---|---|---|---|---|
t3_3s6phg | relationships | I [19 M] agreed to go a date with my friend [18 F] of 4 years, and am unsure of what this means. | I just moved to college, and a friend from high school messaged me wondering if I was interested on going on a date. I agreed, but since she lives about two hours away from me, it makes things difficult to plan, so we had to plan it a few weeks in advance.
I also met a girl [18 F] at my college who is cute, and went on a quick 10 minute date to grab some dessert and get to know her. I would like to go more dates with her, but am unsure whether that would be kosher or not since I already have a date planned with someone else.
I am wondering what the expectation is here. Do I wait on the new girl? Do I tell either the situation? Should I feel guilty? | Agreed to date, someone else is also cute, is it OK to date both? |
t3_3p4s9x | relationships | Am I (27F) being creepy by texting him (?M)? | I work in a second-hand bookshop and sometimes this guy comes in. He's good-looking, the few brief conversations we've had were nice, and despite my general out-going nature, I'm not quite confident enough to say anything.
But, I do have his number - not from him, from when he wrote down a request (i.e. we take down his name, number and the book hes looking for and if it comes in well call him). I've obviously been waiting for the book to come in so I can call him, but it hasn't.
Would it be weird if I texted him?
"Hey guy, it's me from the bookstore. I was wondering if you'd want to hang out sometime?" | I got his number from our database, is that creepy... |
t3_2ezea0 | relationships | Should I [F20] e-mail the guy I met at work [20sM]? | Throwaway cause I'm paranoid.
I met this guy at work. We sell cell phones for many companies and he's one of our many "account executives" for one of the companies. He drops by once every blue moon to check and see how we're doing and then is on his way. We barely have contact with him except if we have a problem or if he just randomly drops in.
He dropped in about 2-3 weeks ago, this was the first time I've seen him and I've worked here for 2 years. He had made a comment to my supervisor about how cute I was and we exchanged glances multiple times. He's probably the hottest guy I have ever seen, and I thought that before I knew he thought I was cute. Him thinking I'm cute is the icing on the cake. Didn't get to officially meet him that day.
He dropped by again 2 days ago and my supervisor asked him if he wanted to meet me officially, and he said yes. I was doing the money room at the time, so I was kinda preoccupied, but he got me all flustered. Come to find out, we shared a few common interests but due to him having to leave and me being busy, we didn't have a very in-depth conversation. My supervisor was swearing up and down he was blushing, and he made another comment on how adorable I am on the way out.
Well, we have his business card, with an e-mail address. A friend of mine said I should make up some BS story on how I want to switch to the company he works for and I had some questions about x, y, z. He said it could be a "good icebreaker", and he said "You don't know if you'll ever see him again" from how rarely he drops by (and coming by twice in a month is RARE for one of our cell phone people, though he did say he wants to start coming by more), but I don't know. I think it might come off a bit suspicious. | Met a guy at work who works for a cell phone company, we flirted, mutual attraction, we have his e-mail address, should I make up some bogus story about wanting to switch to his company but I have some questions before I do so to "break the ice" officially? |
t3_30aw88 | relationships | Does my boyfriend [23M] actually even like me[23F]? | I've been seeing my now boyfriend for 2.5 months and things are great when we are together but not so much when we're apart. Both of us are busy with work so often we only get to see each other once a week (sometimes twice).
When we're together, we have a great time. Even phonecalls are great. But when we're apart, he just isn't fussed to text me! We'll have a phonecall once every 2-3 days, but when you're working all day, there's not much to say apart from boring work stuff really.
At the start of when we were dating he was a lot better with texting. But now, I think he'll happily go a day or two without texting me. We don't text during the day due to work. And I often leave it till about 6pm to text him, so he has an hour or so to chill/get food.
I am always the one to text him first and initiate a phone call as well. I have told him (in a banter-ish way) to try and text me but it's just not getting through to him. It's getting to the point where I feel like I'm severely nagging him.
Is he even into me?! I thought people in young relationships went through the honeymoon text-all-the-time phase... A relationship is meant to be when you're excited to speak to each other and I'm just not getting that from him. How to get through to him? | Boyfriend isn't bothered to text me / speak to me when we're apart - is he into me? How to change this? |
t3_1wu2zj | relationships | Gf [18F] is going to prom with gay best friend [19M]. Is it wrong to be jealous? | Sorry if this is the wrong subreddit. Me [18M] and my gf have only been dating a little over a month, (I am also her first real boyfriend), but have been friends for years before. Her GBF and her have been going to prom together for three years now, and she had never had a boyfriend to take in the first place. We are both seniors in high school but her GBF graduated last year and he's going to the local community college. I'm trying not to step on anyone's toes by breaking their tradition here, but I want her to be my date, even if it is just on paper. I'd still be going but by myself on paper. I guess I'm worried that if they go they'll be together all night and I'd be a third wheel to my own girlfriend. Has anyone else been in a situation like this before? Am I thinking too much about it? | Jealous of a gay guy taking my girlfriend to prom |
t3_546q3q | legaladvice | Did I shoplift from Walmart? | I'm going to France next week, and I wanted to get some toiletries and a backpack. I went to the check stand with a $5 toiletry kit, a $5 bag of trail mix, and a $30 backpack.
However, the checker forgot to ring in the backpack, even though it was sitting on the counter right there in plain sight. I didn't notice that I only paid $11 (sales tax included) instead of $43 (or whatever it should ave been) until I had left the store and got back in my car. The buzzer didn't ring her I walked out, and the receipt clearly says $11
With cameras everywhere, and a receipt that proves my guilt rather than innocence, am I in any legal trouble if I don't return the "stolen" backpack? | The checker at Walmart forgot to scan an item, so I didn't pay for it and didn't notice. Am I in legal trouble if I don't return it? |
t3_2wc0yb | relationships | I [23 F] need to know if my ideals for my relationship with my [28 M] bf are attainable. | I'll try to keep it simple. My boyfriend and I have been in a LDR (see each other about 2x a month - probably has something to do with it) for about 10 months. We get along great, he's a great guy, and we really enjoy spending time together.
Sometimes, though, I wonder if I should stay in the relationship. There is nothing serious he does or says that would prompt me to not want to be with him. But sometimes I feel like I'm just not CRAZY about him. I compare myself to friends and peers a lot - which I know isn't great but it's how I can gauge things - and it seems like others feel more like their SOs are these amazing people that make them feel incredible all the time. Then there's the other part of me that says if I leave, I won't find another person who comes so close to my ideal partner as this guy does.
I know it's unrealistic to be head over heels in love constantly, but is a regular relationship supposed to feel this regular? I have some previous relationship experience but nothing too serious. All things considered, I could be with this guy for a long time. But I don't know if how I'm feeling is normal or if I should seek out that person who makes me feel butterflies all the time. Is that a real thing? Can people really feel like that about one another all the time? Is anyone currently with someone who they think is great but not extraordinary? | My relationship feels very regular, is this normal or should we all seek out someone who we think is absolutely amazing? Do I have unrealistic goals/standards for a relationship? |
t3_rxef6 | self | At a crossroads, and I would like some opinions to help out. | I have just turned 20 and I am a bit lost as to what my future can hold. My father has just given me two months to decide on what to do and the options basically boil down to continue living with him and get a full time job/ keep on going to school (while listening to him as the law of the house) or move out.
This seems like a first world problem and I may be coming off as a spoilt manchild, but I believe a little background is required. My father is a fundamentalist Christian. He's a racist misogynist twat who drove my mother away from home during my fresh/sophmore year of highschool and I had to stay with him because he had the financial stability. I am an atheist mostly with the help from his views. He raised me with his hateful doctrine and I can't say that it hasn't had a psychological impact. I'm socially introverted and quick to anger, I wanted to seek therapy but he would not have any of that.
I am currently not attending school because I feel that I would be wasting my time if I went to college without a clear cut goal on what I want from life, because of my situation I've been living in a stagnant state and I believe that this crossroads can give me enough of a shock to my system to bring out some sort of emotion. I'm hoping for any type of emotion.
With that in mind my other option would be to visit my mother in Haiti, where she now lives. I should probably bring up that I live in the states and part of the problem of deciding is that I am not very aware of the logistics of moving out of country, even if it is temporary. I have no other family that I know of because of my fathers views and I can't imagine burdening any of my own friends when I am still so unsure of everything in my life. | My father is a hate filled man who has raised me in that regard, looking for help on whether a culture shock from moving to a troubled country can help shape my life. |
t3_31a4f5 | tifu | TIFU by not accepting that I don't know short cuts | So my Gf and I decided to take a spring break trip to go hiking in California about 2 hrs from where I live. We carefully plan the trip as we will leave at 10ish and be there about 12.
So we are driving up to the forest when she tells she wants to check out this small town she used to go to. (check out trinkets and such I guess idk...) I agree and I Google map it. About 40 min away.. But then I see a couple small roads that look like they cut angles and time off. And obviously Google maps has no idea WTF it's talking about Ima do *my* shortcut. Well... It took us 20 min in and was a dead end... Drive back and go original way. Gf rolls her eyes pretty hard.
We leave her trinket town and leave to the forest. Once again we map it and I see another "brilliant" short cut. She does her half assed attempt to convince me other wise but I was sure it was better. We ended up lost for and hour and a half to only end up 25 min from where we took my shortcut. We proceed with the original plan..
The last one was while in the forest. We were a good hour into the trail when we deviated off the trail to see some site seeing. Well to get back we decided to go a different way then our original... It is a loop. Wrong... We ended up wasting and hour and a ton of energy/sunlight. We went the original way and just arrived home. She is pretty pissed off and asked if she can keep her jewelry where I am supposed to keep my brain... | Went on hike. Got lost driving. Got lost again. Got lost during hike. Gf thinks I'm an idiot. I think I'm an idiot. |
t3_zcuc7 | AskReddit | My boyfriend keeps playing scary practical jokes on me, scaring the shit out of me. I want to get him back GOOD! Ideas? | Saturday I was sitting down blowdrying my hair and he crawled on the floor and watched me from under the dresser drawer. Head on floor. I screamed.
Sunday, he put his computer game on so I thought he was in office, he then hid in my closet while I lay down to sleep and pounced on me. Almost died of a heart attack.
Monday night he hid in a corner on our dark stairs as I walked by with our coffees. Dropped them, screamed, made a mess. This shall not go unchallenged.
I want to to make a 7 foot dark man or something and while he is sleeping put it on his side of the bed, or the bathroom? any ideas how? or other ideas to get him good? He has a really nice old muscle car we could play with.......Any other ideas? | Boyfriend keeps scaring the shit out of me. Revenge! |
t3_1y2vyw | relationships | I [22 M] just broke up with my long term SO [21 F], and she is now cutting herself and tells me she wants to die. | Using a throwaway, but here is the story:
We have been dating 6 years at this point.
Ok, I'm pretty rattled right now, but here it goes. After a fight yesterday, I realized that we have just been drifting apart, and she has begun to be annoyed with everything about me, and makes me feel guilty over everything. I apologize a lot, but yesterday I realized that this has gone on long enough after she hung up on me and turned her phone off. Today she calls again, and after explaining myself ( a bit angrily) i inform her that i think it would be best that we break up.
After informing her of this, she obviously begins crying, and I am pretty upset too, but I have always had a bit of a stoic exterior, so I keep it together well. We had broken up a few months prior for a small period of time, but that was her breaking up with me. She has had a history of self harm, so I am worried that she might resort to it again. She hangs up and wont pick up the phone anymore, and this makes me very worried. After about 15 calls she picks up, sobbing, and tells me to leave her alone, and she wants to die. I ask her if she is hurting herself, and she says yes. I try to talk to her about it, but she is inconsolable, and demands she has no reason to live and that I am a very mean person (this has been a recent complaint, and though I don't think I am, I've been trying to fix the things she says are mean).
She is currently talking to her mother and I am on hold, and I am terrified that she might actually go through with it, as **she lives alone, and about 2 hours from me or her family.**
I am at a complete loss as to what I should do right now, and how to handle this situation. | How should I handle this situation? |
t3_lrr6e | AskReddit | Got A Letter From Housing Authority, Are They Targeting/Threatening Me? What Should I Do? | First I am NOT asking for legal advice, I just want to know if I should go in tomorrow (or Monday) or what. The picture of the letter I am attaching they mailed out yesterday the same day as the fire drill. I've lived here for over 4 years and the routine of the fire drill is thus:
1. They notify us at the beginning of the month that there will be a fire drill, just never the day. It's usually from 8-10AM (so far the ones I've been here for).
2. They have maintenance go to each floor and go into each apartment to see if we left yet to go outside.
3. After 10-15 minutes of being outside they have us come back inside.
There have been around twelve drills since I lived here and yesterday was my 5th (the other times I was not at the complex) drill and the first time I was asleep when it went off.
I sleep in my underwear (if you find this disturbing, you haven't seen enough on reddit let alone the internet), so it took me a little longer getting dressed. This time around the maintenance member came in as per the routine telling me I need to get downstairs. I told him I was getting my pants on, he said ok and went to the other doors. I went downstairs and talked to [Her], her being the one that is there at the complex for the HA to relay any issues we may have (and she is very nice). She marked me down as being outside and I thought that was the end. Then I get the letter today, and it pissed me off.
What I hate most about this letter is that this is the FIRST time I was late getting down their, they tell me I was NEVER downstairs and they are being snide by asking if I need help to get downstairs AND who to talk to for said help. On top of this they have the gull to underline and bold words 'Every Time' (yet they have it as one word) and are threatening me with an eviction if it happens again. | First time I was late on a Fire drill and they are threatening me with an eviction the next time it happens. |
t3_2l07px | tifu | Tifu by not taking care of poison oak | This happened a couple of days ago and now I'm feeling the wrath.
Background: I like to smoke what one might call, marijuana. My parents aren't too fond of this (I live at home cas free roof) so I decided to take advantage of my surroundings. I built a spot where i can do said act in a peaceful and respectful manor with out having to worry about those blue coats with badges. The only problem that didn't occur to me until it was too late was the fact that poison oak grows where i made my nest.
The fuck up: I was at the gym the other day when my friend noticed a rash that looked awfully familiar to poison oak. He suggested I take care of this mysterious rash as if it was poison oak. Well, I didn't .
Results of stupidity: What was one small dot has now spread to both my arms, my stomach, and even under my eyebrows (yeah, eyebrows). I'm constantly trying to hide my hideous abomination of an arm with long sleeves as to avoid unwanted questions, but constantly being in uncomfortably warm conditions doesn't make it easy.
Work sucks because the a/c is broken, gym and sweatshirts don't work for me, and now I'm in the desert dirtbiking but am forced to wear these long sleeves. Im probably just overreacting but my gawd does this itch. I constantly feel as if each spot is being fondled by some evil being wielding a feather that has one goal and one goal only; to infuriate me beyond belief, and then one more ever so deliberately slow stroke of their feather.
It's not even that bad but I can't stop thinking about it. | Advice only works if you take it. |
t3_4cwpjp | relationships | I [18M] started dating my best friend [18F] after she recently separated with her ex [23M]. She isn't over him. What can I do? | I have been friends with "Shari" for 5 years. Last summer she started dating a college guy and they made each other extremely happy. Recently I've been hanging out with Shari a lot because her ex had been too busy to see her and we have gotten close. Watching movies, going on "dates" etc.
He got jealous and they started to fight so I convinced her they should break up because of the age and his jealousy. We kept hanging out and gotten closer, going to prom together, etc.
Though they still talk. They snapchat and text, but she never texts him when we're hanging out, but I know. I oversaw once their conversation and he asked if she still had feelings for him and she replied just "Yes."
From what I gathered talking to other people who know them, he is telling her all sorts of promises that he'll change and realized how important she is to him.
What can I do? I think he's lying. | Doesn't seem girl I'm dating is over her older ex |
t3_32rrgk | relationships | I (27F) might be moving for work next year, my SO (25F) of a year won't even consider long-distance | There is a good (I'd say 60%) chance I'll be moving to another city for a job opportunity in early 2016. The job market in my field is pretty flooded where I live, and pay/benefits will probably be better if I go elsewhere. My SO has commitments locally that will keep her here for around another year after that, and I wouldn't want her to drop everything and follow me anyway. I was hoping that she would be open to at least trying to continue our relationship, but when I brought it up she made it clear that if I leave we're over at least for now. (She did say we could reassess once she's able to move, but that's a long time from now and a lot of shit can happen in two years.) Other than this issue, everything is fine. I would even have said it was "great" a few days ago, but to be honest our discussion about my potential move has made me start to reassess.
Should we just break up now? When we originally talked about this I thought I was fine, but it's been eating away at me over the past few days. | I may move next year. I'm open to long-distance, my SO isn't. Should I cut my losses? |
t3_44eodv | dating_advice | Keeping count in dating: Is it ever okay? How do I stop? | Sometimes I have a bad habit of "keeping count" when I date men. In particular, I like to "keep count" when it comes to "initiating" things. I've realized that others, and even myself, stop trying to put in effort/initiative when they no longer care or are attracted to you. As such, I find that when someone doesn't show enough care or gives enough affirmation I get insecure because I think they're no longer attracted. I realize this may be wrong because: 1) When communicating through a device (e.g. texting), it's not as personal as speaking to someone face-to-face so sometimes it's hard to tell what someone feels about you, 2) People get busy and the constant need for affirmation isn't exactly a healthy/good thing.
Some examples:
* I send a text to a guy and he doesn't text back, so I decide to not text him at all until he sends the next text back. It seems that I like texting to be almost 50/50 in terms of both parties contributing.
* A guy sends a short text so I decide to only send short texts back even when I have more to say.
BUT, what's funny is that with the last guy I was seeing I suggested we have sex one night. He jokingly (but deep down seriously) said "Finally! You're taking initiative." It's funny because I really did think I was the one putting in more effort in the relationship. | Sometimes I get insecure when I feel a guy isn't showing enough initiative, because I think it means he doesn't find me as attractive or he cares less. As a result I like to "keep count" sometimes, then I end up holding back taking initiative/showing affection. Good or bad to "keep track"? (It probably depends, I think). *HOW DO I STOP KEEPING COUNT? |
t3_4g6ldu | dogs | [Discussion] My lab mix has terminal cancer. How can I make her last few months of life the best they possibly can be? | My husband and I learned in February that our precious dog has nasal carcinoma, a form of cancer in the nasal cavity. The cancer is terminal; there is no chance of curing it. We think she has a few more months left — at most, a year.
We have her on chemotherapy medication (we declined radiation, it would be too stressful for her), and in the past week or so, we have added some pain medication. We are working with our vet to make sure her pain is properly managed. The chemotherapy meds will only slow the spread of the tumor, but it won't stop it or cure it.
What can we do to make the last few months or year of her life the absolute best they can be?
Here's what we do now:
* Three walks a day, 20-40 minutes each
* Treats more frequently than usual
* Instead of just kibble, we are now giving her really good quality wet food in addition to kibble
* A lot more human food than usual (so far, her stomach has not been upset)
* Hikes in the forest as often as we can manage it (probably once every three weeks)
* As much affection and love as we can spare
She is about 10 years old and she has lived the past three years in our house with us. (We don't know what the first seven years of her life were like; we got her from a shelter.)
Does anyone have any other ideas on how we can make her life as good as it possibly could be? I would be especially interested to hear from people who have recently have had to put their dog down.
When we think she can't handle the pain anymore, we are planning on having home euthanasia — our dog absolutely hates the vet and we can't imagine her leaving this world at the vet's office. We love her so, so much, and we want to do everything right for her. Any advice you have would be much appreciated. | I am looking for ideas on how to improve my dog's quality of life for the next few months before her cancer becomes too much for her to bear. |
t3_4j72zw | relationships | My [17F] uncle [26 M], who I am very close to, is becoming addicted to prescription drugs and losing his work and family | I don't have a good relationship with my family due to some past problems. I don't talk a lot with them. My uncle is my life. He kinda rescued me from a family abuser. He tutors me every week and helps with school projects. He buys me clothes, books, sets up my computer stuff and games and is generally my best friend. I can always talk with him about anything.
The last two years have been bad for him. I think his work has not been going very well and he's depressed and down a lot of times. I told him to visit a councillor but people say bad things about those who go. He said there might be problems at his job if he has to go to a psychiatrist. He has always been slightly outcast from my mom's family so he doesn't have anyone coming over to talk to him except me.
So over the last few months he has been taking this medicine called Alprazolam that he said the shop recommended to him and he has changed. I see him getting dizzy a lot. He is starting to get irritated easily. I think he's having trouble concentrating cause he is forgetting what we worked on just last week. He even had a major argument last night over mobile with someone from work.
I checked his cabinet and he has bunches and bunches of medicine. He doesn't have any chronic illness so there's no reason for him to have so many. It's all stuff like diazepam and alprozalam which internet tells me is very addicting.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do. If I tell my mom there'll be even more trouble. And he's drifting apart from me, telling me I shouldn't spend so much time with someone like him. Should I tell a hospital? Or the police?
I'm in Kolkata, if that helps. | My uncle is having a prescription drug problem such that he is becoming depressed and is having trouble with his work and his estranged family |
t3_q4lmx | jobs | Minimum six hours prep work for tech support interview? | I had a great (imo) phone interview yesterday for a technical support position and they want me in next week to see how I'll do on the software and on 'fitting in' I suppose. I was given a list of webinars to start with and to basically learn and be able to demonstrate how they work. I just totaled up the starting list and came up to six hours of videos to watch!
It was hinted that I should watch them multiple times and really be able to strut my stuff next week. Only I am a college student - I have an exam to study for, a shift at my current job to work over the weekend, three projects to put serious work in to and who knows what else - basically I'm worried about having the time to prepare fully.
Is this unusual? It seems like an entry level technical support position; sure I will need to know everything once I'm hired, but for right now I died a little inside upon doing the calculations (and that's only for one watch a piece). Any advice on what to focus on or do I just really need to commit myself to getting everything accomplished? | second 'interview' next week, told to watch six hours of webinar videos multiple times and memorize them, is this uncommon, advice? |
t3_l21wr | AskReddit | dear everyone who says "i'm no good at math/science" | it has long been my contention that every person who says "i'm no good at math/science" -- if you listen long enough -- will eventually either admit that they just don't want to have to work that hard, or they had a teacher who made them feel stupid.
did test scores pigeon-hole you?
did your teachers/parents not push you hard enough?
i'm just curious, because i always had to work much harder (do more problems, get tutoring, etc) to succeed in math/science than my friends, but i did it, and now as a software developer, i'm not so worried about my future as people i know with degrees in things like communications, or sociology, etc. | y u no think u no good at math/science?? |
t3_2auhip | relationships | Me [33 M] broke with my girlfriend [28 F] of 4 years, feels horrible, afraid I am making a mistake | We are ending a 4 year relationship. Even though I am 33, this feels like my first true break up since I have not been in such a long relationship before and I am afraid I am making a mistake.
I have known this person for 4 years and we have been pretty much tied to the hip. We have lived together the past 2 years in the same apartment.
A lot of difficult things came between us, my mother did not approve of her race and her job, and left nasty notes for her in my apartment.
After standing up to my mother, we have not been talking for 6 months.
In addition, my lack of commitment to my now ex-girlfriend made her increasingly bitter and angry, she felt hurt that my family seemed to reject her even though I felt like I stood up for her with my family.
There is also the lack of sex. With the stress of my family, pressures to commit, while at the same time supporting her in my apt (I payed all the bills but I make much more money), I felt there was a loss of spontaneity and sexiness in our relationship and it translated in lack of intimacy in the bedroom.
This is going to sound weird to you guys but I love this person to death. I would do everything to see her smile and make her happy. She's my soulmate and understand everything about my insecurities and fears. I am afraid to lose her but at the same time I do not want to hurt her anymore by half committing, and I am afraid that I have already lost her.
I want to hear from people who have gone through a similar situation where they were able to survive parental disapproval and loss of intimacy and rise above it. | broke up with girlfriend of 4 years due to family disapproval, loss of intimacy, anyway I can make this work? |
t3_vjt86 | relationship_advice | I need help... | Hello there, first post here, I need help. Let me explain the situation. Yesterday, I was at my friend house to celebrate the saint-jean (she's a girl, I'm a boy). The Saint-Jean is the birthday of quebecers. So I was at her house and we were alone in the tent, and we drank and we drank a lot. I was lying beside her and we were drunk... I'll leave you the details. So yeah, we didn't had sex but it was pretty close. So now today there's a ''disconfort'' within her and me. Now we can't talk and I'm feeling really sad and I don't want to loose her. Please help? | Got drunk with my best friend(I'm a boy, She's a girl), did things that I regret with her, don't want to loose her, need help. |
t3_2pyge7 | relationships | I've (18/M) fallen for a girl (18/F) who has a boyfriend, how should I approach this situation? | I met a girl about a month ago and we've been having hour long conversations every day since. We've met up 7 times, but it's usually in a group situation. I've never met her boyfriend. We have a great connection and she starts the conversation almost every day. We like the same things, have the same sense of humour and have a lot of fun when hanging out...
So you see my dilemma. There's been many times in the past where I've felt that there could be potential for a relationship but none of them have compared to her. I've asked girls out who I felt I had less of a connection with and had enjoyable relationships, so I know this could work out, but the classic problem of her having a boyfriend stands. I don't know what he's like, whether they're happy in their relationship etc, so how should I proceed? I know I won't be able to live with myself if I don't get some closure on this because there's nothing I hate more than not knowing what could have been. | Met amazing girl, obviously she has a boyfriend, unsure how to proceed. Pls send help reddit |
t3_1b8dul | relationship_advice | [30/f] Just had a conversation with my fiance's other girlfriend. The wedding is in 5 months. How to go about this? And why do people cheat? | My fiance and I have been together for 4 years. Engaged for going on 2. Wedding is in August. He got a job in another state, so he has been living there by himself. I am in grad school and can't leave until graduation in May. He has been gone for two months, and came home to visit for my spring break this week.
After a night at his hometown bar, I got a texts from a girl in his new city who told me that they had been dating for the past couple of weeks and had slept together several times. She had a photo of the two of them together, and re-sent the photo that he had texted to both of us (hence, how she got my number). She also sent a picture of the hotel bill from the night before he left to come back here, which upon investigation, he has a copy of in his email. His email is open on his computer. Not exactly trying to hide it.
He is currently passed out drunk in bed, so is no use talking to. I'm panicking. And don't really know how to go about this. The wedding is planned. Paid for. People have bought flights. But I don't think I can marry him if this is true.
I thought we were happy. How does one cheat on someone they love? And is there any coming back from this? | Fiance cheated on me. Wedding is sooooooon. What to do? |
t3_42n7q8 | relationships | I (28f) think my husband (26m) is upset wants to leave me | Please help, I think I am suffering from undiagnosed anxiety, and it is really affecting the health of my relationship with my husband. My husband doesn't really have much changes in behavior/attitude except for positively. He's had anger issues that he's worked so hard on and is so much better.
So, basically, I take things that have always happened in our relationship and suddenly think "oh no he's super annoyed/pissed/angry at me, now he doesn't want to be around me, what if he wants to dump me and get rid of me?!" Whereas when I'm in a normal, positive state of mind I will know it's just my husband being my husband. But whatever is wrong with me is taking it and blowing it out of proportion. I know this because I have asked my husband frequently "what's wrong, is everything okay, let's talk".
Nothing will be wrong. He's happy with me, he loves me, and I seem anxious and sad. Please help me, I am freaking out. I know (logically) he isn't, but my mind keeps circling those thoughts obsessively. How do I stop? | I am trapped in the thought that my husband is upset with me and wants to leave me, but logically I know he doesn't. What is wrong with me? |
t3_2slez0 | relationships | ? How do I [39 M] meet/talk to a girl [33 F] at work - when she's in a different department/building ? | I work at a pretty big place (10,000+ people) that has many buildings and departments. I saw this one girl on match.com (she's not on it anymore) that I then recognized from work and have been desperately trying to figure out how to meet her. She works in a different department and different building and I can't figure out how I can bump into her to express my interest. None of my friends at work are familiar with people in that area and so I can't figure out how to contact her.
Unfortunately I may have missed my chance already because I have learned that she is seeing someone - that would explain her leaving match.com, but I have a major crush on this girl and I can't think or concentrate until I at least express my interest to her. But I have NO idea how to do it. There are probably a couple of cases where I could "accidentally" bump into her - if I walk the halls enough, but I'm not sure that is the best way to do it. At this point it seems like the only way to do it.
I'm trying to figure out if she's involved in any fitness activities at work - since she's into running, etc, so maybe I could see her at our gym, but without knowing her schedule that seems impossible too. I guess it couldn't hurt to be in the gym all day - at least I'd get in better shape.
I know this sounds stupid, and given that I'm 39 (she's 33), you'd think I'd have this stuff figured out by now, but I don't. Maybe I shouldn't even do it since she's seeing someone - but I'm already sad that I missed my chance once so I need to at least try one last time. | So how do I "accidentally/on-purpose" meet this girl at work or how do I express my interest to her - without getting fired? |
t3_1t0w6y | relationships | I [29 M] am struggling with my GF [22 F] of 2 years, because I see the same thing happening as my last relationship. | Okay, a little background information. Before my current relationship, I was in a long term relationship that lasted ~5years. In the end I decided to end it because I felt like I was contributing more than her. The biggest things that contributed to us breaking up were the fact that she didn't really have any close friends, we didn't share really any of the same interests, she had nothing to keep her time occupied (i.e. she had no hobbies or passionate interests), and overall I felt like I was more passionate about her than she was me.
I have been in my current relationship for almost 2 years now and I'm starting to see a lot of the same characteristics of my last relationship surfacing.
There is also one more thing I would like to mention and get some feedback on. In my current and past relationship I feel like my significant other loves me but I cannot get them to really show it in any way. By this I mean we have sex, but it is always the same thing and nothing more than that. It is always at night, right before we go to bed and almost every time, if I am not initiating it, it won't happen. Now I don't expect that every time I have an intimate moment with my girlfriend that it turn into hot steamy sex or resemble something like a porno. In both relationships I have talked with my significant other about this on multiple occasions but nothing is changing. Am I just asking too much for her to *want* me, to actually initiate an intimate moment where she is the driving force and shows me how she really feels about me?
Thanks for any input. | I think I'm getting into the same relationship again and I can't get her to show me how she feels. |
t3_3ov4o5 | relationships | I [19M] am in my first relationship with gf [19F], her first too, for 3 years now. Our relationship is great but I can't get the thought of meeting other girls out of my head. | We've been together for 3 years, we are each other's first. We get along quite well, she's my best friend. We have our problems but there's been nothing we haven't worked through together. Our sex life is good and we don't argue yet I can't help but feel a sense of yearning to play the field a bit and meet other girls. I'm ashamed and feel horrible about it.
There's a girl that I work with that is interested in me, and I had a crush on her before I even knew her, as she lives in my area and we see each other around. The thought of throwing away what I have with my current girlfriend makes me feel disgusting as she's great. She has a bad self image and anxiety and I don't want to hurt her in any way, I love her. She's done so much for me, she helps me with my own anxieties in a way i don't think anyone else ever could. She knows me inside out, and I her. We have an understanding of each other's headspace and are comfortable with each other in that sense completely.
I've spoken to people in my life and have been told that I'm too young to be worrying about things like being in a relationship and that I should be making the most of my youth and worry about being happy. On the other hand I've been told that what I've got is good and I should be happy maintaining it. I guess why I am posting this here is I'm looking for a bit of perspective and advice please. I'm happy where I am but it's like a "grass is greener" situation and it's doing my head in. Thanks. | I have an ideal relationship, I should be content but I feel the urge to meet other girls and throw it away. |
t3_kq4fk | AskReddit | What is the absolute worst thing a former 'Friend' has done to you? This happened to me the other day, | Me and a friend Derrick were stoked to go to a concert located approximately 130kms away from our home town. We didn't have a designated driver until my Girlfriend offered to drive us last minute. My girlfriend didn't like the band playing, so she went to wait at her girlfriends in the meantime.
We get there and surprisingly meet up with our friend Cindy. Cindy is an old high school friend who I haven't seen in a while, we've been friends for a long time (about 8 years or so). She tells us that she can give both, me and Derrick a ride home after the show. I then call my Girlfriend and tell her that she can didn't have to wait for us (the show ended at 1:00 – 1:30am). She thanked Cindy and left for home.
*Flash forward to the end of the show*
I turn around during the on core and see Cindy walking towards the exit. As she left, she got swallowed by a crowd of people. I then texted her "Are you still giving us a ride?" Cindy then responded with "Nope :)". Personally I thought she was joking. I didn't start panicking until Derrick and I left the concert and tried calling her/texting her. She turned her phone off.
We didn't have any money for a cab, hotel, motel etc. We also don't know anyone that lives in that huge city. Furthermore, I had college in the morning, and my friend Derrick worked, so we *had* to make it back by morning.
Derrick and I tried to walk 130kms at 1:30am in the morning in the cold (gets chilly in Canada this time of year). We walked for a solid 2 hours until a cousin of Derrick came and saved us. | Former Friend said she would give me and another friend a ride back home from a concert(130kms away), then left us there as 'a joke' |
t3_1rpz89 | relationships | My[22 F] bf [22 M] of 3 years did some bad things in our relationship. I don't know what to do. | I'm writing this with a throwaway. I love my bf and when things are good, they are really good; I feel so close to him, he seems perfect for me, and we have a lot of fun. But when things are bad they get really bad.
He's done things that were very aggressive over the past 3 years (it started about 2 months into the relationship and the last time was over 6 months ago). He never hit me but he has pushed me to the ground, held me to the floor when arguing, threw things at me/at walls, punched things (including punching holes in walls), hit me with a pillow repeatedly until it broke open, snatched my phone from my hand and cracked it in two, and spit on me repeatedly (this is the worst one for me).
When we argue, he yells and throws things. He calls me names and swears at me (but I don't do the same to him).
His ex girlfriend also told me he slept with her twice while we've been together (I don't know if it's true or not, he flat out denied it).
Writing all that down, it seems obvious that the relationship is not healthy and I shouldn't stay. But I do love him and enjoy being around him when things are good. Things have been perfect for about a month now, but I just can't forget all of the things he did.
He says I'm just being insecure, sensitive, and overly emotional. He thinks I should just be able to forget all the bad things he did and to move on. He says he will never do anything like that again. I don't know what to do.
I'd really appreciate any advice. I'm not saying I'm perfect; I do have my insecurities and I can be passive aggressive and moody at times. I just don' t know if he's right and I'm being too sensitive about things that happened in the past. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to respond, I really appreciate it. | There have been some really bad parts in my relationship. Everything is good (for) now, but I can't forget the things that happened in the past. |
t3_2nr64w | relationships | Me [20M] asked her to a 'second' date [21F] and not sure of the reply. | I have been talking to this girl for about a month now. Originally I asked her for drinks but it took us about two to three weeks to actually go due to different circumstances that boil down to both of us being quite busy.
We got a drink and talked for around two hours (although I think I was more talkative, she still contributed to the conversation a lot) and at the end of it we hugged and went our seperate ways.
I've spoken to her since then (mostly through social media) and got her phone number. She also said she had a great time.
I asked her if she wanted to go watch a movie sometime and she replied that she would like to go as a group (so I assume with her friends since we don't have any mutual ones really) when she has more free time.
We are both university students and the semester is obviously coming to an end so there is more work, plus she also said she has a friend coming over. Still I am not sure what to make of her reply, especially since she said she would like 'all of us' to go (no idea who 'all of us' are haha).
I am reluctant to call it a date, but whatever it was, I thought it went pretty well. I am just not sure if she is interested though and I don't want to ask outright since that seems pushy. What would people suggest I do? I don't want to wait another month (or make that two since I am busy during Christmas) to go on another date... but at the same time I would like to continue things with her. Should I try being more direct? Thanks for any help! | Asked a girl to the movies. She said she is busy right now (she does seem busy) but would like to go as a group (even though we don't have mutual friends) when she has more time. Not sure if she is interested or just politely rejecting me? |
t3_fdq6q | AskReddit | Need help locating elementary school Sing-Along Math Songs - 1989-1991ish? | Alright guys, I have come up empty-handed on this one. In what I can remember and something my fiance laughs at me for is the story I told him of why I can remember my multiplication table so well. I don't remember exactly what grade I was in when I was, perhaps 4th or 5th grade, math consisted of homework problems, book lessons and a record/tape my teacher played for the classroom in the background while we sat doing paper and pencil problems. Each number had a different catchy theme song to it starting with 2, the voices were extremely distinct (One song had a westerny tone, another was a fast-paced tune and another with different voices chiming in with each higher number shouted out) I sang him the one I remembered best, the 2's song. (Different voices chiming out, it was hilarious at the time and cheesy) I have absolutely no idea what this educational song was called and haven't had much luck on the internet. Does anyone else even know what I'm talking about, heard of something similar or perhaps had this tool in their own class? I'm 29 years old, I would have been maybe 7 or 8 at the time? It would have been around the same timeline schools were still holding parachute day and firetruck day. Joy! | Math songs in elementary helped later in life, trying to find songs! |
t3_23giau | dogs | [Serious] Hello, I am Charlie and I have Bipolar Disorder | I had not been diagnosed until about a month ago after my third hospitalization, though the disorder has been giving me issues since senior year of high school with anxiety and major depression affecting me since sophomore year.
I had to almost completely drop out of high school due to side effects of the disorders, and due to their increasing intensity, I have had to miss a lot of class first and second semester of college.
There is a great chance I am transferring universities for my sophomore year of college, but I am hesitant to make this adjustment with my disorders, especially since my episodes are still occurring and the panic attacks are frequent.
I have been doing a lot of research into Psychiatric Service Dogs, and have been considering it as an option. Due to my busy schedule and the rigor of work (both in and out of class) to which I subject myself, it seems like a smart choice.
My worries are:
1. All of the effort and money required to attain a Psychiatric Service Dog will be for nothing because I will not experience a positive effect. 2. My peers not understanding the necessity of the animal.
My question to all of you - Do you think with my condition and the life I choose to live, acquiring a Psychiatric Service Dog would be a smart decision?
(I am also cross-posting this to /r/mentalhealth) | Do you think, as a college student with the above disorder and rigorous college and work schedule would be in the best light to acquire a Psychiatric Service Dog. |
t3_4c8vk0 | relationship_advice | [19/m] My GF [18/f] of 4+ years just broke up with me over a free pass. Advice? | Me and my girlfriend had been dating for almost 4 and a half years. I am currently a freshman in college and she is a senior in high school. I hadn't seen her in person in two weeks and she said she was going to come up to my school and I got real happy that I was going to see her.
Anyway long story short, she comes up and asked me for a free pass to get with guys because she feels lonely and wants to feel what it's like to be single. I said I don't believe in that. And told her to pick me or them. So, she broke up with me. I just didn't know any of this was happening. She never expressed any of these thoughts before.
Anyway after she left, she started texting me and telling me that she made a mistake and that she wanted to be back with me. I have been crying a lot because she is my best friend and I just want to be with her. But I don't want her to resent me if we get back together without her getting her pass. I just want to be with her, but I don't know if I could love her the same if she started to just get with random guys. We have never broken up before and I thought we would be together forever (naive I know).
But she would always say shit like asking me if I was okay with never kissing another girl for the rest of my life. Because she was going to marry me. And now I don't know if I really loved her or just loved the person that I thought she was.
Anyway, if anyone has any advice or has been in a similar situation please get back to me. | GF broke up with me because I wouldn't let her get with guys. Advice? |
t3_2a46la | relationships | Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [20 M] 6 months, told me how fat he used to think I was, am I allowed to be upset? | I always gave him digs by mentioning that the one time when we first started dating that he was really stingy and wouldn't by me ice cream. It was funny, I thought.
Today however, when we were texting he told me the real reason was because he annoyed I had been gaining weight.
He works out a lot and to build muscle you have to eat a lot of calories, so we'd always go get food together ((crappy dorm food even!!)) and I ended up gaining 10-15 pounds in a couple months? But I noticed the weight gain and started a gym routine and lost at least 20 pounds since then.
But that fact that he has the nerve to tell me how annoyed he was with my weight gain and how he was grossed out by me? I don't know I'm very hurt! I used to be very overweight as a child/teen and have struggled with body issues and anorexia. I went from being 190 pounds freshman year to 105 by the start of my junior year. He knows I had all these issues and still chose to tell me this.
He backed up his argument by reminding me of the time when one of our friends ((who is kind of a butthole but that's just him idk?)) called me fat as a joke. He said to me that he actually kind of agreed with him. And that he's glad he called me fat cause that inspired me to start working out.
It just bugs me because he isn't the fittest dude either! But I like him for him, our personalities really compliment each other well and I just love being around him, so little things like weight gain or unattractive habits never bothered me.
I would never dreamed of saying anything like this to him.
I don't know, do I have a right to be hurt? | Boyfriend of 6months told me he used to think I was fat and unattractive, I lost the weight and feel / look great, am I allowed to still be upset though?' |
t3_4fiboe | relationships | Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] 2 months, my first relationship ever | So about 7 months ago I started being friends with this girl. We got a along really well and have some similar interests. After knowing each other for about 5 months we started dating.
Before we started dating she had been involved with some guys before me which I have explicitly told her that I don't care about as long as she's with me now. She is my first girlfriend but before her I had a lot of friends which were girls.
Recently she has started making up problems pertaining to the fact that I had girls that were friends before her. Her anger about this has been going on for about 2 weeks now and whenever she gets mad about it she says really mean things to me.
I do like her a lot and I get the impression that we can work through it, but I don't know how since this is my first romantic encounter with a girl ever.
I thought I should add that she is also the first female that I have ever had a first kiss with or anything similar to that. | my first girlfriend is mad that I had girls that were friends before her |
t3_1ntdcp | AskReddit | What are some must see places in the US for someone wanting to visit all 50 states in month? | My last post was removed by a mod. I've reworded the title to include a question and only the question. I still fail to see how this is a survey, yes/no, DAE, highest vote wins etc question. I am genuinely looking for information.
A bit more information for you.
I will be working in the US next summer and I will have a month to go travelling when I'm done. I want to see all 50 states while I'm there. I'll be working in Pennsylvania, so I don't really need to visit it when I'm done.
Also while I'm working there I'll have time off where I'll definitely get to visit New York and New Jersey. So really, in one month I want to visit 47 states basically. What's the best way to get to Alaska and Hawaii?
If we can, we want to visit Mexico too for a couple of days. | I have one month to visit 47 states. What can't I miss. I'm over 21 so drinking and gambling aren't an issue. |
t3_3g67dt | relationships | I [25M] found sexts towards other people in my [25F] wife's phone. | Throwaway for obvious reasons.
Me and my wife Mary have been married for a little over a year, together for 6. Things have gone smooth for the most part. We have our disagreements like all couples do, but it never leads to any arguing or resentment.
For the past month, Mary has been acting real suspicious. She's has serious mood swings and is super protective of her phone. She takes it everywhere she goes: the bathroom, kitchen. She basically is always with it now. I've also notice her "work hours" have changed. She usually leaves at 8:00 a.m and is home by 6. I've noticed the past month that she leaves at times as early as 6:00 a.m and comes homes as late as 7.
So, with all the suspicion I was having, I decided to snoop through her phone last night. Not proud of it, but my suspicion got the best of me. I was desperately hoping to find nothing, that this was all in my head.
That wasn't the case.
I found sexts to multiple people. But there was one in particular to this guy named John that really made me sick to my stomach. She sent nudes to him, told him how much she wanted him to shoot his load in her mouth. She even spoke about me, saying how we don't have sex enough and that I make no effort towards it. We have sex 4 times a week, which is pretty good IMO. Ironically, I almost always initiate sex, so for her to say I don't make any effort is BS. I sent the text messages to myself.
I'm not sure what to do at this point. We don't have a house or kids, so I guess that makes things easier. But I'm not sure how to handle my emotions. I've never been cheated on before. I've gone from crying my eyes out to wanting to call her a bitch and curse her out in a matter of seconds. I haven't talked to anybody about this, because I feel like people can't keep secrets. | Found sexts towards other people in my wife's phone. Don't know what to do. |
t3_u8dax | AskReddit | Who else watched that Mermaid shit on Animal Planet? | (Commence Downvote)
My family was watching it and I read the article on here a few days ago so I gave it a shot. I'm visiting for the summer and I don't have cable so I was fully ignorant to the shit they can pass off as true through the tube. Fast forward two hours later, 40 minutes of commercials, almost an hour of poor quality CGI, claims of mermaid bone records, and video footage of a 8 year old flip phone with zoom in capabilities and at least 720p quality, I was fucking upset. Oh, and they claim all their evidence was confiscated by the Navy.
So, I thought, someone on reddit has to have torn this shit apart. I haven't found one yet. I'm assuming every skeptic on here is far more intelligent than me and already knows that cable and Animal Planet is full of shit.
Don't get me wrong, I'm interested in the aquatic ape theory, and I've seen the TED talk on it so naturally I'm arrogantly assuming I'm more informed on the matter than everyone else...
Lastly, a quick google search of the lead Dr | Animal Planet is either the greatest troller on basic cable or someone could sue those motherfuckers. Evidence? Citation? Lawsuit? |
t3_2g378h | relationships | Me [24F] with my SO [27M] 2.5 years. Help me find some clarity | My partner and I have been together for nearly 3 years. I know he loves me (at least he tells me everyday) but I'm starting to feel like he's just here because it's convenient. He doesn't try or put effort into the relationship. Theres no fun surprise gifts, no notes or cards, no dinners or out really any outings at all if they weren't booked by me. There's lots of talk about "oh i want to do ...(insert activity) I always respond positively but nothing ever comes of it. He's just life lazy. I try hard to get him surprises and thoughtful things that remind him that I love him, but they're never reciprocated.
We've been living together for over 2 years and he still doesn't cook or clean up around the house. I moved from overseas with him for his dream job, and in the meantime have found a great job that I love, but my family is on the other side of the world and I feel alone. When I try to talk to him about this stuff he patiently listens but never changes his behaviour.
There were a few issues of lying early on the relationship, secret dinners with his ex and visiting her family. I always think about that when he tells me he's somewhere with his friends, wondering if he's lying to me again. I mean do people change?
On the most part I'm happy in this relationship, but I do wonder if I'm missing out. Should I be treated better? I'm sick of feeling like the only person putting effort into the relationship.
Is it me? Is it my loneliness projecting on him. This is really my first serious relationship and I don't know if this is just how it is. He's kind to me and we support each other financially, but am i missing out on something? I often wonder if talking my issues out with a professional might help me, but I feel like I'd be wasting their time. | Am I under appreciated by my boyfriend? |
t3_53b244 | legaladvice | California-based employer, employee working remotely from home in Oregon -- is this usually a large hassle for the employer when it comes to payroll? | I work as an employee for a large multinational company, currently at one of their California offices. I work from home most days of the week already (currently living in California still).
However, my husband has a job opportunity in Oregon, and it would be nice to live somewhere with a more sane cost of living (and I'm actually from there originally, and miss it there).
So, we'd like to move to Oregon and ideally I could keep my current job and just work remotely from Oregon. I don't think it'd be a problem for me get my manager to sign off on me working remotely full-time in and of itself, but I'm concerned about the tax implications. Namely, my concern is that because taxes are different in Oregon vs California, they might say no due to the hassle of paperwork or whatnot.
I looked it up, and the company is registered as a business in Oregon as well, if that affects anything. I've poked around the net about this situation, and apparently many employers respond to the request (to work remotely out-of-state) by opting to switch the employee to a contractor. That's not a deal I'd want to live with long-term. At that point, I may as well find a new job. | As a current California resident working for an office based in California, will it likely be a prohibitively complicated payroll hassle for my manager to let me work remotely from Oregon? I know I'll likely have to file both Oregon and California taxes. |
t3_2o8tyi | relationships | I [26 M] think my girlfriend [32 F] wants to get pregnant. | We've been dating for about 2 years now. For the past six weeks or so we haven't seen each other much because her sister recently had to have a hysterectomy. I thought this was going to be the cause of us breaking up, but we finally got together and things seem to be back to normal. However her sex drive is way up.
During the two years we've been dating I've never used any protection. She has always claimed to be on the pill and I always trusted that she was(Disclaimer: I do know that its not foolproof and that it was stupid). However now something feels...different. I just don't have a good feeling about it. We're meeting Saturday for a date and shes made it clear that she wants to get laid and I don't know how to bring up after 2 years that I want to wear a condom this time.
I am not financially stable enough to have a kid so it was stupid of me to have risked it as much as I have, but we've recently had discussions about how shes worried her parents will never have grandchildren and that her biological clock is ticking. This issue is compounded given her sisters recent medical issues.
I realized this all probably sounds juvenile and stupid, but I love her and I want to marry her. I am just not ready for children and I don't know that she would be honest with me about her intentions. | I'm worried my girlfriend is trying to get pregnant and I've never used a condom during sex with her and I don't know how to bring up that I want to without starting a disastrous fight. |
t3_48egg6 | tifu | TIFU by joking at a way too serious conversation | Ok, so my school is putting on a production of Fiddler On The Roof. It's gets very boring waiting for practice to start, so me and my friend like to read the script and poke fun at it, coming up with very bad puns in the process (my favorite would have to be if it was set in modern day, and is called Fiddler Raising The Roof). We were cracking jokes, many of them being terribly unfunny, but we were cut off from making any more of our horrendous puns by our musical director, signaling everyone to sit down and shut up. Right before we get started, he asks people for any intentions to keep in their hearts (I go to a private school so they can do that type of thing). About three hands come up, one asking for their sick brother (nothing serious, just a mild case of the flu), and another asking to pray for the play. The last hand is called on, and he says this.
" I'd like to pray for my cousins because my uncle is in prison now and they're in a home."
I didnt think anything of it. But one kid decided to ask what this kid's uncle was put into prison for, and this is where it gets bad. He says this:
"He 'allegedly' hired a hit man to kill my aunt."
Everyone starts whispering, gossip begins. Apparantly my musical director heard about this on the news, and tells everyone a rundown of what happened. His uncle, who lived in Florida, hired a hitman to kill his wife, yadda yadda yadda. But there was one thing that stood out to me. Lived in Florida. This is where I start to fuck up. Me, being hopped up making bad puns and jokes, bump my friend on the shoulder and said:
"Of course this is in Florida."
I 'might' have said this too loud... I look over my shoulder, and the boy asking to pray for his cousins is looking at me STRAIGHT IN THE EYE. I feel super bad about it right now, but I think he knew I messed up, and it's all good. | things got really dramatic at a joke at play practice. |
t3_1v7sri | legaladvice | OHIO - Possible Expungement of Record | In June of 2007 I was convicted/plead guilty to O.R.C. 2907.07B, a 5th degree felony in the State of Ohio. This is the only offense I have on my record, not even a misdemeanor. I was sentenced to 5 years community control(probation), and it was somehow determined through an MMPI that I needed group therapy.
I successfully completed group therapy, which not everyone does. They either don't complete it, complete it, or successfully complete it. Due to successful completion, I was let off probation 1 year early. That was July of 2011. I'm coming up on the 3rd year since completion of probation, and from what I have heard, felonies can be expunged after a 3 year waiting period from the last day of probation.
I've read up plenty and I had lost hope that I could get my record expunged. I then found the [Ohio Senate Bill 18] ( from the 127th General Assembly, which was passed on October 10, 2007, AFTER my conviction date. To me it pretty much says that my offense is expungeable, as this bill is NOT retroactive. The last thing my lawyer had said to me, was to make sure I get my offense and registration expunged.
I do have some hope, as this appears to be plain as day, but then again, I am not a lawyer. Expungement would greatly increase my chances of getting a decent job again. If asked, I will give as much information as I feel comfortable. | Convicted of 2907.07B in June '07. Let off probation 1 year early. [Senate Bill 18] leads me to believe I can get record expunged in July. So can I? |
t3_3w7gxs | relationships | Am I (22f) handling this crush correctly? | Long story short: I'm studying with a small group of people. I really cant avoid them for any significant period of time unless I want to drop out. I have a crush on one of them. Now, it was really minor until my boyfriend tried to break up with me. He talked himself out of it, and we're fine now, but that gave a chance for my crush to intensify. I've taken some pretty serious steps to stamp it out asap, which is my goal, but I was hoping others would have more ideas?
1. I put more effort in my relationship and do more for my boyfriend. Generally try my best to keep working on improving things and enjoying "us". This is my biggest priority.
2. I try not to talk to my crush as much as I can avoid him. I also indulge myself in thinking about him, following advice I read on here once. It's meant to avoid making the crush seem like this enticing taboo?
3. Trying to spend more time and do projects with my other friends.
My concern comes from my crush intensifying so much all of a sudden. It also feels like the more I avoid him, the more he is "there". Eugh. Basically I much prefer my boyfriend and I'm totally in love with him, I just feel like the rocky period in our relationship made it harder to control my feelings. I've never really had this issue before. I need help.
Also everyone studying the same subject as me..we're like ten people..we're going on a trip abroad for a week soon. It's mandatory. My boyfriend is so fucking perfect and tells me just to send him an email once a day so I don't worry about keeping in touch too much and I can have fun. By the way, he's the type to think crushes in long term relationships are normal, he just doesn't want to hear about it and trusts me. So. I come to you guys for help because I don't feel like I can confide in anyone else about this. | Have a crush, don't want the crush, cant avoid the crush. What can I do? |
t3_4ehlmz | relationships | How do I (21f) stop getting jealous in relationships? | I'm 21 and have only had two serious relationships before. They were both abusive, the first one physically and the second emotionally and verbally. I know the first cheated on me and suspect the second one did also.
Anyway, in both those relationships I would get really jealous. I would get jealous when they would do things without me, hang out with other girls, and even when they take a long time to text me back. I know I respond to texts fast but it seems like most guys are a lot slower. And then if I see that they are on Facebook and haven't replied to my text yet I assume that they're ignoring me or talking to someone else. I was usually pretty good about keeping it to myself and ignoring it but I don't want to have those jealous thoughts at all.
I recently started talking with this guy I really, really like. He lives a bit away so we just text a lot. He's moving back here after the summer. I don't want to start with these jealous tendencies again but I already am. I keep it to myself but my mind races when he hasn't texted me back in hours but I see him on Facebook. I know it sounds super silly. He also goes out a lot and drinks and has tons of super pretty model looking friends. I know he likes me a lot too though and we text everyday.
So how do I stop being so jealous? I don't even know why I do this to myself. And before anyone might suggest counseling for the past abuse, I am already seeing a counselor. | I have always gotten jealous in relationships. I now like someone a lot and I don't want to ruin it by being jealous. I need to stop doing this to myself, but how? |
t3_1jbgsl | legaladvice | Will my story in my traffic court tomorrow possibly allow the judge to add a reckless driving to my ticket? | Sorry if this is the wrong section to ask this, but some legal advice would be greatly appreciated:
Last month, I got a ticket for speeding on the highway, apparently going 82mph in a 65 mph zone. It was on Saturday night. I was on the left lane and then switch to the lane to the right. the car in the front was getting close and his breaklight suddenly went on. I panicked and turned to the left lane again. However, when I did, I saw that I had cut someone off and was really close. Without thinking, I accelerated and that's when I got pulled over.
I know it was wrong of me and I take responsibility of my actions, but it was the weekend before my last high school finals and I was stressed out and had just found out I was going to my safety college because of financial reasons. I really wanted to get home that night.
I am still a very young driver, age 17, and the ticket is 400 dollars. I have learned my lesson and have not gone past 70mph. Please give me some word of advice for my court appearance tomorrow. I have learnt my lesson and am just hoping the punishment isn't as severe as it currently is.
Should I plead guilty or not guilty? Also, would I still be able to attend traffic school if I plead not guilty? | Because the car in front of me suddenly touch the break, I panicked and changed lanes and cut a car off on the left lane. I felt bad and accelerated, resulting in me getting pulled over. |
t3_1tl80r | relationships | I [19F] might be in love with my boyfriend [20 M], not sure how to approach this. | We have been together for around 7 months; I think about him all the time and I enjoy spending time with him. I have had one previous relationship which ended badly because I would not say I love you back to him. I am now really nervous of the idea of love. I am not sure I even love my current boyfriend because I do not have any real examples to go off of in my life. All I know is I really really enjoy spending my time with him.
I am probably thinking about this too much or putting too much into the idea of love. I guess I am just curious. Whenever we watch movies together and the people begin to talk about love or say I love you I get all rigid and think about my breathing like he can tell I am thinking about us. It is silly how nervous I am about this. I am not very good at expressing my feelings and I feel uncomfortable with public displays of affection so we do not really talk about our feelings for each other too much. I have no idea how much he likes me and I am really worried I am more invested in this relationship than him. I do not know if it would be the right idea to tell him I am falling for him or not. I do not want to scare him away and have things end up like my previous relationship except with the tables turned. | Might be falling for my boyfriend, I cannot tell if I am or not. I do not want to scare him away by telling him I am either. |
t3_4nyqwf | relationships | I [28M] have come to the conclusion that I'm bisexual, but have been in a hetro relationship for 5 years [28F] and I don't know what to do. | My girlfriend and I have been together over 5 years now, living together for 4. Over the last 12 months I've become highly confident that I am bisexual through looking at stuff online and "solo exploration". I've also been going through counseling for general depression stuff, and have come out the other end with a much better appreciation of self-acceptance and I think that is why I'm looking to engage with this side of myself more. If I were single I would certainly explore a sexual relationship with a man. However, I am not single.
My worry is that if I don't do anything about it I might end up at an older age with resentments, and I already have some internal conflicts now about hiding my 'true self' (silly terms, but I don't know what else to call it!).
I feel like these are the options available to me, and I'm lost for what to do:
1. Squash down homosexual feelings, never acknowledge them, get married, have kids, the end.
2. Tell my girlfriend that I feel like this but I'll just look at it online and hope she doesn't think it's weird (she will though).
3. Tell my girlfriend that I feel like this and that I want to have a sexual encounter with a man, but I don't want to break up and I hope she can accept that. (I doubt this would go well)
4. Break up with my girlfriend for the sole purpose of having sex with men and then feel terrible for the rest of my life that I threw away a practically perfect relationship.
5. Don't tell her and have secret sex with men (obviously a pretty horrible thing to do).
I'm looking for advice and if anyone has had experience of a similar situation. I'm really at a loss. | Accepted bisexuality, hedonistically would want to try out some man-on-man action but I don't want to throw away my relationship. Is there any way I can make it work? Has anyone made it work for them? |
t3_kef06 | running | Question about pooping & running... | I've started running again, feels good - but the longer runs are sometimes cut shorter than I'd like by an all-encompassing urge to shit my brains out. I run in the morning, before work. I know a lot of people have this problem but I'm wondering if anyone has a solution/fix. I've tried holding my poops in longer into the day to see if I can throw my "regular time" off a little later in the day so that my daily turd isn't "in the on deck circle" while I'm working out. So far it doesn't seem to be working, but it's only been a few weeks. | Is there anything that can be done to stop "Runner's Poop"? |
t3_3jf1r9 | relationships | Me [21F] with my boyfriend [20M] of 1 year, it doesn't feel like he is very committed. | My boyfriend is great; he's motivated, caring, and just really fun to be around. We've been together for a little over a year.
For context, this is his first relationship, whereas I've had a few boyfriends (both short and long term) in the past. The problem boils down to this: He hasn't told me he loves me. This probably sounds really petty, because I do know that he cares about me, but there are some things that make me doubt whether he's really committed to this relationship.
To start, he constantly skirts around the word. He will say things like "I like hanging out", or "I really care about you", which sound (to me) like something you say to your friends. You might wonder why I don't just say it first if it is bothering me so much; he becomes VERY uncomfortable even having a conversation about it. If the word is even mentioned, he gets uncomfortable.
Now, we also have a lot of mutual friends. I've had them ask multiple times if he has dropped the L word yet, and it's super embarrassing for me to tell them because they look at me like they feel bad for me. I have to act like it doesn't bother me, but it does.
I have been understanding that he wants to take things slow (as it is his first relationship), but I'm starting to wonder why (after a year) he doesn't know for sure yet. He also gets uncomfortable discussing the future and says things like "that's looking too far ahead".
Am I right to be bothered or am I being unreasonable by not giving him more time? | BF hasn't dropped the L word and is making me question his commitment. |
t3_3okm1p | tifu | TIFU by accidentally walking into a Marine's residence and getting a gun aimed at me | So this actually happened a month ago.
I live in an apartment with three other people living there too. My house is located on the third floor, and a US Marine lives on the first floor.
So, I had recently been promoted, so I went down to the bar with my buddies to do some drunken celebration.
After a night drinking and partying, I was quite hungover. I took a cab back to my apartment.
Now, keep in mind that I was very dizzy and unfocused.
I walked up the stairs, hoping to reach my place, but my perception of time was distorted by my intoxication. I wound up at the first door, but thought it was the third, which is where I live.
The door happened to be unlocked, so I entered, figuring I must have accidentally forgotten to lock it.
The Marine is sitting on the sofa, watching TV, and when he sees me, he immediately jumps up, reaches into the sofa, and *pulls out a pistol.*
Before I know what's going on, I hear the click of the pistol's safety being switched off, and it's aimed right at my head. I try to exit, but he yells "DON'T MOVE!" before slowly reaching for his phone with one hand while the other holds onto the pistol.
I realize that he's going to call 911, so I quickly explain the situation, stating that I entered the wrong house. After a lengthy explanation, he seems to understand that I was not a robber.
He had only seen me once or twice, so he probably didn't know I lived in the same apartment, although the landlord had told me about his profession.
After apologizing, the Marine told me he had once been robbed was now always on the lookout for intruders, so I forgave him for pointing a loaded gun at my head.
I then left, and that's that. He left the apartment two weeks later for some reason that I still don't know. | Got drunk, accidentally opened Marine's door, got a gun pointed at me |
t3_4kjimg | relationships | Me [22F] with my boyfriend [22M] of 3.5 years, recent college grads. He's going to be moving for work, and I'm not sure if I want to do long-distance or turn down a job offer to stay with him. | My boyfriend and I recently graduated from college. He has a solid software engineering job lined up in Seattle, and I have an offer for a 1 year long government position in San Francisco. I'm currently debating whether I should turn down this job offer and move to Seattle with him, or do long distance for at least a year (after which I hope to go to medical school).
There are several reasons why I would want to take the job offer and try to do long-distance. First, Seattle and SF aren't that far apart (only a 2 hour flight and same time zone), so it's not too long-distance. Second, the salary is decent ($50k + health benefits), and job security is always nice. Third, my family is from SF, so I would be living at home rent-free. Fourth, a lot of my friends from high school/college will be living in the SF Bay Area, whereas Seattle would mean establishing a new social network.
There are also several reasons why I would want to move. First, I have a bachelor's in public health, but this position (basic HR/office-type role) is not related to my field of study. Second, I'm not sure I could make long-distance work. I care deeply for my boyfriend, and I can't bear to be apart from him. Third, Seattle would present the opportunity to start anew; I've lived in the same part of the country my whole life, and this could be a learning experience. Fourth, I dislike living at home, and if I moved to Seattle, my mom would kick out my freeloading SIL from the SF house and rent out the house (negates point 3 above). | I'm not sure if I want to move with my boyfriend to a new city and forego job security or stay at home and try to make long-distance work. |
t3_ruq76 | relationships | am i being ridiculous? please be honest. | Background relationship info: both 18, been dating for 3 and a half years.
So sometimes my boyfriend will like other girls pictures on facebook that he knows. Sometimes they are his friend, sometimes they are random. But I get kind of uncomfortable when it comes up on my news feed that he liked a girls picture. Sometimes he even comments on them. I can't explain why, but it makes me uncomfortable. I have confronted him about it in the past and he usually just calls me psycho, but I feel like if I asked any other girl how they would feel about it they would say the same thing. I don't get like rip shit like "ermehgerd youre cheating on me with her cause you liked her picture!" I'm just like "Oh why'd you like her picture" I can't explain why it makes me so uncomfortable. Like if you think a girls hot or whatever that's fine but you keep that to yourself and don't display it on the internet for your girlfriend to see.
But yeah, am I being insane? Honest opinions please, thanks. | Boyfriend likes other girls pictures on facebook. It bugs me, can't even explain why but it does. Should add his profile says he's single. |
t3_440ej9 | relationships | Me [23]f pregnant with first baby, just puked during/last second of sex. BF [32]m thinks he is gross. | I am just ending my 12th week and unfortunately I had just overcame most of my nausea only for it come back out of nowhere this morning. My bf was about to be on his way to work and we went to do our thing. He kind of put his weight on my stomach a few seconds before he was about to finish then I am not sure why but it literally felt like he knocked the breath out of me and I couldnt breathe. The combination was bad. I held it in for a few seconds and then pushed him off as he finished and started puking off the side of our bed.
A week ago we had a talk about hygiene because stress has made him kind of lazy. He was showering once every two weeks, literally. After the talk though,
It's been every night or at least every other day. He had tears in his eyes and I asked me how I could do it with him if I was that grossed out and to be please be honest because he didn't want to make me sick. He got me the trash can and and tried to baby me as I explained it to him but had to leave for work. He looked really hurt. :/
I texted him and he hasn't responded or called on his break. I don't know what to do. | got sick during sex. Thinks it's his fault. What do I do? |
t3_gb11m | AskReddit | How do I argue with someone who is brainwashed by corporate America? | My GF works for AT&T. No matter what she defends their products, their service, their business decisions. For example, the T-Mobile/AT&T buyout.
I stated that the buyout could be good for infrastructure (coverage, 4G, etc.), but does run the risk of creating a monopoly like situation in the near future. I state that if a monopoly happens, that it could stifle innovation, reduce competition, and hurt customers pocketbooks, etc.
Her response is I am way off my rocker, AT&T is no way making a monopoly or making it possible down the road.
So I then tell her that AT&T has screwed people before. For example, they put data cap on wireless data (makes some sense to me). They tell people to use their wifi at home, work, etc. because it's faster and clears up bandwidth. A year later they then announce a data cap for wireless (not cool IMHO, I understand strain on infrastructure). Seems like it was planned the
Her response is that customers don't have to stay with AT&T, and she doesn't want to deal with customers who act like me about a data cap.
I respond that in many parts of America, people don't have a choice on the internet provided.
She said BS.
I then state that corporate America has gotten to the point where the people and what is best for them no longer matters... huge fight with examples cited, etc. | Am I wrong for trying to get my GF to see that corporations are taking away the rights of Americans. That corporations look out for their pocket books and not what people(customers) want? How do I argue with someone who thinks AT&T and other corporations are always right? |
t3_4r12dk | relationship_advice | I [31/f] have a new bf [28/m], but it's making me realize more every day that I'm not over my ex. | I was engaged to someone who I was with for 3 years. I moved to another country for him and we lived together for a year. He completely broke my heart (cheated on me with upwards of 5 people in the time we were together). I know we weren't right for each other; he also cheated on his gf before me several times, and I don't think he's capable of being faithful. However, he had a lot of great qualities as well. Obviously. That's why I said yes to marrying him, and was willing to uproot my life for him. We broke up when I finally decided to move back to the US. This was 8 months ago.
I did everything you're supposed to do when trying to get over someone. I cut off all contact; blocked our ability to even see each other on fb; I changed my number. I did this for about 6 months. And in that time I started seeing someone else.
That someone else and I have been dating about 5 months now. Things are fine between us. He's nice and treats me well. But around a month ago I started missing my ex. It really surprised me. It sort of sprang up out of nowhere one day. I tried to push it out of my head for about a week, but couldn't and then I started talking to him again over FB. Nothing big--just a catch up message here and there. "How's this family member?" "How's that friend?" "What ever happened to that promotion you were going for?"
We message maybe once a week, or every two. It's always me that instigates. He's clearly moved on--has a new gf.
I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't stop thinking about him and missing all the things he had about his personality that I loved. I genuinely think about him multiple times a day. Do I break up with my current SO? i think it's pretty shitty that I've been with my new guy for 5 months and can't get my ex out of my head. | I was engaged to my ex who I was with for 3 years. Now I'm 5 months in with new bf. Can't stop thinking about the ex suddenly. What do I do? |
t3_2ay944 | relationships | Me [22F] with my BF [27M] of 8 months, he is extremely introverted and I am extremely extroverted...need some balance help! | my boyfriend is extremely introverted. Lately we are in a routine that is lacking. We spend almost all our time together which is great for me but seems to ware on him since he is used to being alone. After we both get home from work Ill go to his place usually (or he will come to mine) and we will make dinner, watch tv, read, basically do boring couples things... Lately sex is kind of blah. He has gotten lazy and no longer feels a need to woo me. I think (and he later confirmed) we spend too much time together. He needs a night or two off. Which is fine, but i dont know how to do that and move forward with our relationship at the same time.
Introverts: I need you to tell me How would we be able to live together if he needs a night a week away from me? How do I go about this? I want to keep my partner happy, I want to make this work. As an extremely extroverted person, I need help finding a good way to go balance this. I also want to know how introverts would want this situation handled. | boyfriend and I of opposite personalities have reached a rut caused by routine and over exposure to one another. From the mind of an introvert, how do I balance this better AND move forward with the relationship. |
t3_3o9pq5 | relationships | [21 M] Relationship seems doomed after getting back from long distance | I started seeing this girl last October, and we were together through the end of our senior year of college. We did distance since then, except for a 3 week period where she was back in town and we could see each other briefly a couple days a week. We had a fight at the beginning of that 3 week stretch, but patched things up and had a good time before she left. In the 3 months since then, communication broke down more and more and we had a few big arguments about it. She was very busy, I was the complete opposite, and it led to tension.
She got back the other day and it was clear that things were off. She didn't seem very excited to see me. We got lunch together yesterday, and afterwards I told her that if she needs time to ease back into things we can kind of build back up slowly. We talked a bit more and she said she wasn't sure if she felt strangely about me or if it was because she was going through a big life change by moving (which is why I suggested slowing things down in the first place). We're going to reevaluate where we stand in a week or two, and in the meantime just focus on our own stuff and having fun with each other.
Now you're probably all cringing at this, but I'm not stupid. I know that this is the sort of thing you don't usually come back from. She's probably going to tell me it's over, but I gave her the out yesterday to tell me then if she doesn't think we could get back to where we were and she didn't take it. I know that she at least used to be really into me, and I feel like that's something we could get back, and (at the risk of reading too much into it) it seems like she might think so too. I just don't know how to balance giving her space and trying to make that happen. | Girlfriend went away for a 3 months, said she feels weird about us but isn't sure if it's because of life stress. How do I balance giving her space and trying to reignite the spark we had? |
t3_4mgrdo | relationships | Me [20M] with my girlfriend [20F] has been dating for a year thinks I am too friendly with my girl friends | I think I messed thing up forever. For awhile now my girlfriend has been very apprehensive about me chatting with my girl friends. She thinks that I am too friendly with them and flirty. I do agree with what she is saying but today she read through my messages on Facebook and found a conversation I had with a female friend in which we agreed to hangout more in the summer, in a friendly way, which she thinks that I have reverted back to me being a flirt. I thought that I was pretty blatantly joking in the messages about being best friends with her or coming over to her house and eating dinner etc, but my girlfriend thought that it meant I was being way too friendly with her.
I think that I fucked things up forever. She now doesn't want to talk to me and is thinking about ending things with me. Anyone have any advice regarding this situation?
She has been my life this year and I love her so much. I know that she is the one for me. I know this for sure. I've thought about spending the rest of my life with her and I would do anything to keep her happy. | Girlfriend thinks I am an asshole for being overly friendly with a mutual friend, thinking about breaking up with me over it. |
t3_1w2zkb | relationships | My [20/M] girlfriend [19/F] of 5 months might be too much in love with me! | I'm her first serious boyfriend.
It's gotten to the point where I've become half of her world. She's barely able to go an hour without texting or calling me now. She says "I love you" very frequently. She wants to spend a lot of time with me. Although she says it's OK for me to do my own thing, I can tell that she is upset when I leave her alone or say no to hanging out together.
We see each other every day as long as we're in the college campus. She's becoming increasingly... clingy. Now don't get me wrong, I love her, but I'm terrified. I've never had anyone other than my parents love me like this before.
She's very loving and caring, but it seems her affection for me is growing at a terrifying rate. She doesn't ever directly say anything, but judging by her words, I can feel that she's starting to get jealous of me hanging with other girls...
I'm scared that she'll become so attached that it interferes with all of my other friendships. I never had this problem until two weeks ago and now I don't even know what to think. She gives me more than enough space, but it's starting to seem like she's giving me less space.
I am also terrified about how in love with me she is. I don't know what will happen in the future. Maybe we'll remain together and maybe we won't. But if we break up, I'm terrified at how her state of mind would be afterwards. I love her enough to worry for that. I don't want to cause a permanent scar in her life. | Girlfriend might be too in love with me, scared to hurt her in the future and also scared that it may grow to something worse. |
t3_2ubq74 | tifu | TIFU by wanking with hair gel (NSFW) | Context: I live at home with my two parents and my brother. My parents both work and were both have been gone since Monday on their anniversary to Vegas. Anyway, my brother and I walk to the same school every morning but on Fridays, I get out at 10:30 today because I have a weird schedule that consists of an early lunch and multiple free periods. Keep in mind I have had a stuffy nose for the past week or so redditors.
Story: So, I get out of school at 10 o'clock and get home around 10:15. I hang out for about 30 minutes or so, until I realize the significance of the empty house. So, I decided to open up the spank bank. I am mildly aroused and decide that I need some lubrication. I look around my room and cannot find my lotion so I head to my parents room where I still cannot find any lotion. Checking the time, there is only about 25 minutes left to do the deed. I then go to my brother's room and find a bottle of what appears to be lotion. I rush to my room, fully naked, hoping that I will have enough time for a quickie. I turn on the content and apply lotion **generously** and the rest is history. After I am finished I put the lotion back and clean up a little.
My brother came home about 2 minutes later and obviously couldn't smell the lotion or see any of the mess. A few minutes later, I sit down to watch tv, and my balls begin to feel a little weird, but I brush it off. I fall asleep on the couch and awake three hours later in agonizing pain, my sack feeling like concrete. I think back to what happened and hobble upstairs like a penguin to my brother's room to check the lotion. Turns out, it's **hair gel**. I couldn't smell the difference when I used it because of my stuffy nose. In a desperate attempt, I jump into the shower and feel a searing pain in that area. I don't dare to look down, but when I eventually do, it feels and looks like a rock hard, sun-dried tomato.
This:
vs
This: | What I thought I used to "wrestle the dragon" was not Nivea moisturizer, but it was in fact Nivea ultra forte extra strong styling gel. |
t3_2ortkj | relationships | Me [23/M] with my friend [25/F]. I need to get over her. | So I went to school with Rachel. We weren't friends to begin with but my final year (she had graduated but stuck around our hometown) we became close.
When I was 19 we slept together a few times. Neither of us wanted anything and that was that. I got a different gf and she got a different bf.
We've kept in touch and work in the same town, and have lots of the same friends so see each other fairly regularly, sometimes by choice, sometimes by chance.
Problem is, I am not over her. I didn't want to date her years ago, but now I can't stop thinking about her. She has a boyfriend but we've spent the night together several times this year. No sex or kissing but semi-clothed cuddling and touching.
Thing is, I know she isn't interested in me, she has cheated lots on her bf and I know I'm nothing special, just another guy who pays her attention, but I can't seem to keep away.
How do I get over her? Help me, its ruining everything, I can't stop thinking about her. | Slept with a girl years ago, still not over her, not helped by seeing her/ staying at hers. |
t3_3y36zh | relationships | My boyfriend (28M) wants us to move in together. I (28F) want to keep living with my parents to save money. | My boyfriend and I have been together 10 years. I'm in my second year of residency and he works a corporate job in the same city. We see each other about once or twice a month, always during the day, and its been this way since I started med school 6 years ago.
One of his roommates is moving out in February and they're still scrambling for a new one. He really wants me to move in, but med school was so expensive and living with my parents has saved me so much money. It doesn't make sense to leave until I have a job lined up.
On one hand, it would be lovely to live with him. On the other, our finances would be quite strained for at least a few years, and I hate the idea of him bankrolling me. Advice? | Resident torn between saving money and living with boyfriend. |
t3_n6kie | Advice | I just saw my math teacher walk out of an adult store | Nothing much really to add. I cannot really reveal names or tell you my name; hence the throw-away account. I would give you the address, but you "reddit-detectives" would figure out the college pretty easily (not many choices). I was thinking about turning this into a reddit-commic, but that would imply that I find humor in this situation. This professor is truly a great guy, but I've never really gotten along with him. My friend thinks that he's hilarious, but he was always so strict and straight that you'd never really pin him to be "the type". None of my friends know, although I know they would die in laughter. THE STORY: This adult store is actually in a pretty public place 20 miles away from the college campus (where I live). He walks out of the store at eight looking completely casual. There was no sketch hat or 3 layered coat to hide his identity. I was eating pizza at the Dominoes right across the street. Our eyes lock for about 3 seconds, and I know he recognized me because I just attended his office hours at 5:00. There is no confusion that it was my Math Professor. I gave him the poker face, got up and left my delicious pizza, and drove home. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but there is no doubt. So reddit, I am a 5'6" girl, so I'm no good at shakedowns. God, I wish that I am making this up; I mean I already have a satisfactory 'B' in the class. I get to see him again on Friday for our midterm. What do I do? I'm not the type who is any good at a shake down while simultaneously I cannot just turn him in? I'm generally downvoted into oblivion for my posts, but this time I REALLY need the community's support. | Math teacher recognized me as he walked out of the adult store at approximately 8:00 P.M on Thursday. |
t3_bq9ap | Cooking | Kale Pesto w/ pics | Sounds gross right? Well it is. But i made it work. The other night i grabbed a random bunch of veggies (pic)
elephant kale, artichokes, shallots, tomatoes, fennel, basil, garlic and a pepper. I also grabbed a random bunch of seafood (pic)
oysters, scallops, shrimp, clams, baby octopus. octopi? octopusses?
Anyway, after some thinking (read: drinking beer) i decided to make a pasta dish and use the kale as a pesto base. I made pesto like you normally would in the food processor with oil, nuts, parm etc. Tasted it. NASTY. Worst. Pesto. Ever.
But that was raw kale so i was not scared. Once i added it to the pan with tomatoes, garlic, shallots, shaved fennel, etc it got real good fast. Combined with the seafood and worked.
Here's the final product: | Kale. It's Good. |
t3_3v18iu | relationships | How do I (24f) avoid royally messing up a first date? | Sooo I (24f) met this guy (28m) earlier this year at a party through a friend but we were both in relationships at the time. We didn't talk much beyond just saying hey how are you...anyway, we're both single now and last week he texted me asking if I wanted to go out some time. Honestly, I didn't even remember who he was or what he looked like but I said sure. We have been talking A LOT since then, which I know is a bad idea before the first date. But we have plans to go out Saturday and he's really hyping it up. He told me he is really excited, he loves my personality, he thinks I'm really funny, he's going to be disappointed if I'm shy in person, he hopes for this and that, etc. He has this image of me in his mind that is SO not me...he thinks I'm outgoing, a people person, super friendly...I am none of those things. I told him that but he doesn't believe me for some reason? I feel almost like I'm going to disappoint him...
I am pretty shy--especially in a situation like this. I've actually never been on an official "first date" where I don't know the guy before I go. I like what I know of him and I'm excited about going out but I feel like I can't possibly live up to the image he has of me...how do I avoid royally messing it up? | How do I first date. Help. |
t3_323v2b | needadvice | Serious problems with concentration/memorization | Hi, I'm under 30 and have a serious problem with concentration which badly affects my mood and personal life. I believe that it became this big when I was promoted at work and instead of performing precise tasks, currently I have to lead a group of 20+ people, assign tasks, give advice on the job etc. Literally: I have to talk more, remember more and am more stressed (I am the kind of guy who wants to do everything as well as possible).
So the thing is that sometimes when somebody speaks to me I fail to concentrate on what they tell me, even though I try. I really do. My mind may become blank during conversations - as though I was closed in a soundproof, black box. If I cannot "hear" someone, I have problems recollecting it or cannot remember it at all (in some cases this may mean that I totally can't say what someone told me a moment ago).
The problem is both frustrating and worrying - I am worried that this could evolve into a serious disease when I'm older. I have always had a similar problem only when trying to do more that one thing at a time (for example, reading and thinking about something totally different makes me forget about what I did read; I have to re-read the last page) but what I am observing nowadays is much worse.
Are there any exercises/activities which could help? Could this be caused by stress or the amount of work? | my mind may become blank during conversations - as though I was closed in a soundproof, black box" |
t3_2pj46k | relationships | Me20 and gf having trust and consequently sex problems | My gf of 3 months has lied before about her past especially who she was with and why she was with them. Also inconsequential things like how many times she's had sex with each partner, not that I asked. I've caught her in lies that didn't matter and ones that turned out to matter because she would wave things in my face only to realize she's done them too.
But the problem here starts with my cousin TS[M21]. TS has slept with over 40 girls, most of them meth whores(rightly so, since TS is a meth-head) and a few have been HIV and/or Hep C positive. I asked my gf specifically if she slept with him citing concerns for health and she very promptly said no. I thought nothing of it since TS was known for how scummy he is and I thought much higher of her than that back then. She denied it vehemently each time he was brought up even if I didn't about it.
Finally TS called and told me and said he didn't at first for his own selfish reasons. I confronted her and she still lied but eventually gave in. Since then I don't look at her the same, I barely get turned on by her or at all really. All I think about now is how she got fucked by a meth-head in a gas station parking lot at 2 in the morning and how she lied about it. What do I do? Kick her out, take a.break, work it out, look the other way? | girlfriend of 3 months lied about sleeping with my meth-headed cousin in a gas station parking lot. He's slept with 40+ girls some of whom had HIV and Hepatitis C. What do? |
t3_2xzzgm | relationships | How do I[22M] go about a hanging out with a girl[23F] I liked, and havent seen in months? | Hi guys. I'm a college student in my final quarter of school.
About 6 months ago I met this girl through a mutual friend of ours. At the time, we got along really well. She also had a long term boyfriend of I think 4 years at the time. I really liked her, but out of respect of their relationship I never did anything. Anyway we eventually stopped hanging out, and I stopped hanging out with her friend group as well.
Cue yesterday, and out of the blue after months of no contact, she messaged me. She told me she missed me and wanted to hang out. Checked her facebook, and she is also very recently single. However, I am not sure she is interested in me romantically. We always got along well in the past, but it was never anything beyond mild flirtation. I've also completely fell out of contact with her social group and mutual friends.
I want to hang out with her, but if she isn't interested in me romatically I feel a 1 on 1 hmight turn out awkward. At the same time, I no longer hang out with any of her friends. And all my friends are just bros who go barhopping and hit on girls a lot, so inviting her to hang out with mine, would really not mesh well. What should I do? Would scheduling a 1 on 1 be awkward? | girl i havent seen contacted me after months of no contact. she wants to hang out, but lost touch with all mutual friends. is hanging out 1 on 1 weird in this situation? |
t3_3ju6yx | relationships | Me [24M] with girl [28/F] I just met - what's the etiquette for leaving her place? | So theres this girl I met yesterday at a beach party. We spent the whole day together, then went back to mine. She didn't want to have sex as we just met but we fooled around a little at mine, before she walked home. I'm seeing her tomorrow for (in her words) a "quick dinner".
Now I'm thinking quick dinner might involve dinner then back to hers/mine which I'm fine with. But if I go back to hers, as someone who has always brought girls back to his apartment and never gone to a girls place, I have no idea what the etiquette is. Do we just have sex then I get up and leave? Do we have a cuddle before I leave? And if so, for how long? Do I wait for her to fall asleep before leaving? I wouldn't normally care if it was a one night thing, but I'm thinking of pursuing a little more with this girl so don't want to come off as needy by overstaying my welcome, but also not coming off as a douche bag by just fucking and leaving. | What is todays etiquette for a guy who doesn't want to come off as needy or as a douchebag when you go to her apartment? |
t3_jrav2 | running | Fairly new to running, just look for any thoughts or advice on current training | Hi runnit, In the last few months I've added running into my program and was looking for any tips on how I've been going.
I've been out to the athlete's foot and got a new pair of running shoes that apparently supports my gait (based on the really expensive machine I walked on). They are Nike Lunarglide 2 - I tend to roll in at the end of a step I think (don't know if that means under pronated, over pronated or there's something wrong with my prostate - basically my weight passes over my left foot like this bracket '(' and for my right foot this bracket ')' ). I have to say it's a lot more comfortable than my old crap runners, now my calves and to a lesser degree my shins are a bit sore after a run, rather than getting hip and ankle pain like I was. Running is a lot easier as well. I generally run 3 times a week at the moment, two 6km runs (36 mins each) and a 3 km run (about 15 mins). Working my way up to 10km in an hour.
I know minimalist running is all the rage here but for someone doing so little mileage is it really necessary, I really like my soft squishy shoes.
Do the calf and shin soreness indicate any particular problem with my running style, it feels like DOMS more than anything just being careful.
I try and think about heel striking when I'm running but it's hard to really know if I'm doing that, do you need a video of me running to know for sure?
I also ride my bike about 20 km's a day as well (to work and back), and do body weight exercises so my muscles usually feel a tiny bit stiff all over most of the time. Calf and shins soreness I can directly attribute to running though. | geez sorry for the wall of text, questions are the last 4 little bits, just read that and ignore the rest |
t3_3bsz5d | relationships | Me [30/F] first date with a guy [28 M] went well, now not sure where to go from here: is he into it? | So I went out with this guy on Friday that I met on Tinder and have been talking to for like 2 months prior. He lives upstate and comes down here for work every 2 weeks or so (he'll be moving here permanently in the fall), but it hasn't worked out to get together until now. We had a really fun date, went bowling... no kiss, but he said he'd let me know when he was in town next and we texted a little bit after that night. I really like him and he's super cute, but I honestly can't tell if he's into me! I've been on so many dates since I moved here 3 months ago and this was the first guy I really felt something with.
So since Friday, I had to initiate the next contacts, but we texted over the course of a few hours Sunday night and again last night. He always texts right back, which is good.They're good convos, but nothing really too flirtatious and again, I've had to initiate them. I also noticed he's still very active on Tinder, which after 1 date is fine, but still doesn't make me feel like he liked me enough, you know? Am I jumping to conclusions? Have I been friend zoned? I know it was only 1 date and it's early, but I don't know how to proceed with this guy. Any thoughts? | How can I gage if this guy is into it after one date? |
t3_2ku25w | relationships | Me [16M] has a crush on a girl [16F] that I know and talk frequently to for 1 year, I recently discovered that she's homossexual, any tips on how to get over it? | So, I know this girl for 1 year, we talk very frequently with each other. Mostly because we have really good synergy talking to each other, like, we are really good friends for now. But recently (yesterday in fact) I discovered that she's a lesbian, and she does have a girlfriend. This got me really shocked, I don't have any problems with it, but I was shocked because she didn't showed any sign of uninterest in males this whole 1 year, and she's probably the female that I most talk to.
So, because I know that, and discovered that she also has a girlfriend, what are the best ways of getting over it? I'm asking this because If I try to have the objective of making her fall in love with me, It's setting up for disappointment, and how can I still be friends with her without any romantic feelings? I had for a long time already those romantic feelings, but I don't know, I don't think I would be able to be a good friend as I am right now without those.
Also, I'm not sure which flair would fit this situation, so, my bad if it's on the wrong flair. | Has a crush on a girl for 1 year, discovered that she's homossexual and also has a girlfriend, any tips on how to get over it and maintaining a good friendship without romantic feelings fucking it up? |
t3_50hdhs | personalfinance | I sold some stuff with the specific intention of paying down my mortgage. Now that I have the $10k sitting here, I'm wondering if I should. | I have $32,000 left on my $64,000 mortgage. I've been here for nine years.
I pay $530/mo and an additional $700 towards principal every month. This works out to chopping $1000 off the principal monthly. If you're paying attention, this means I have exactly 32 mos left on the note.
I sold two pieces of never-used construction equipment with the intent of paying it down even more. So now I have $10,000 sitting here.
I don't need the money for anything and am passed the "ohhh shiny let's buy that" phase, but the only dissuasion is that if I sink the cash into the mortgage, I don't get any warm fuzzy out of it. Yeah, $32k goes down to $22k, but I don't have anything tangible to show for it.
IE, it would be nicer if I had say $12k remaining, threw the $10k at it, with an additional $2k from savings and BAM **paid off**. That'd feel nice. | What else, *of value*, could I do? |
t3_3fbo9q | tifu | TIFU by surprising a girl I like but ended up in sadness and bad luck. | So this is happened just an few hours ago. I am seeing this girl that I really really like and planned to surprise her by waiting for her in our common place (which is where she pass by when going home, also note that I already did this before but I waited right outside her office building,). A text earlier by her told me that she's still in the office because of some problems occur on her work so I decided to not call and just text. I bought some food and drinks because I know that she's pretty exhausted(she did like 3-4 hours of overtime this week including this day). About 3 hours later of waiting(12:30am), drinking some coffee to keep me awake in some fastfood chain, she finally texted, that she's already home, then immediately texted again to tell me goodnight.
So there I was, regretting that I didn't call for the duration of waiting, feeling drained and disappointed in myself, my excitement of seeing her turned to sadness.
And while going home, the public vehicle that I'm in crashed to another car, me and other commuters go find another one to ride in while feeling weary. Atleast I got to eat the food that I bought for her though. | I planned to surprise the girl I'm seeing and after waiting for hours I ended up missed her and already home. Got crashed while going home. Teary eyes. |
t3_3bax9w | personalfinance | I already have a 9-5 desk job, but I am barely skimming by and would like other ways to make money. | As of now, I work the normal 40-hour work week making $10/hour. After taxes, this leaves me at about $1,162 after taxes, enough to pay for my $500 rent and utilites along with food and other expenses, but I'm living really frugal now and I recently had to spend my rainy day fund and now I only have about $200 in savings. Luckily, I'm probably going to get a promotion in 6-8 months paying me $16/month and about $1,920 a month after taxes. However, I really want to build up my savings again so I was thinking of getting a side job, but I don't know what because I've always done the one job at a time thing because I was in high school or college until recently. I am a 22-year old male, have a BA in Economics, have experince with customer service and HR positions, and I obviously want my side job(s) to be legal. I am aware that I probably won't be making bank, I really just want to accumlate some side money in case I have another emergency. | I need part time work for about 6-8 months to compliment my current income |
t3_12ok9m | relationships | I (18M) asked her out on a date by lying to her (18F). | So i have this enormous crush for about a month on this girl in my class and she seems to be interested in me aswell. We don't talk much but i notice her staring at me all the time. However when i look at her she looks away which I think is really cute. I am kinda shy and didn't know how to ask her out so I came up with the story below.
She is really into horse riding and all that stuff. So the other day when my classmates where talking about gambling I said me and a friend of mine own a racehorse to impress her ( She is sitting a row infront of me ). The whole class was like WTF this guy owns a horse? And i had to go along with it. I filled out my made up story with some facts about horses I googled because of her.
Problem is she wants to see it and I was like: "Sure come see it next week at the stable". I made some phone calls and I am about to pay a jockey some money to pretend I own his horse.
This whole story sounds so fucked up and im really ashamed and embarassed to lie about it in this way. I cannot concentrate because the guilt is killing me since I really don't know anything about horses.
I really like her but i do some stupid shit when I have a crush on someone. Im afraid to tell her it's all bullshit so I thought if she liked our date I will tell her the truth it and argue that I lied only because i really liked her. | Told her i own a racehorse to impress her. But do not want to come out with the truth. |
t3_4uv30f | relationships | I [29 M] want to propose to my girlfriend [28 F] of 4 years, might have talked too much. | My girlfriend is expecting me to propose, I bought the ring in her size and everything. It's beautiful, and I'm excited. But I think I talked to much about HOW I intended to pop the question to friends/family.
I spoke to one of her sisters, her dad, and one of her friends (mutual friend of ours) about doing something extravagant for the proposal itself (costing an extra like $700). However, we have a lot of stuff booked this whole summer and I don't think I can afford it.
I want to propose another way, but I don't know if the original plan secretly got back to her, and if I propose another way, will it let her down? The proposal is supposed to be a happy, awesome
memory, and I don't want it clouded with some disappointment.
Has anyone been in this situation before? Should I ask the people I told if they spoke to her about it? | Talked big about an extravagant proposal, now can't follow through, not sure if the original plan got back to the bride-to-be and don't want to disappoint her. |
t3_3u0jx0 | relationships | How do I (24f) tell my co-worker (32f) that her feet STINK? | Ok, I worked at a community mental health center as a therapist. I teach people effective communication every day, so I should be able to do this, but I'm at a loss on how to approach it. One of my coworkers has this habit (which I HATE) of taking her shoes off every time she sits down. Her feet, to put it nicely, have an unpleasant odor that fills the whole room within minutes of her shoe removal. At first I thought it was just me being sensitive, however, other co-workers have mentioned noticing it too. I work with this particular co-worker every day, and once per week, we do group counseling with clients together. Even clients have mentioned "something smells in here" and it's SO embarrassing. I'm not sure if she realizes that it's her taking her shoes off causing the odor.
So, how would you go about mentioning this? Or would you mention it at all? We are equals at our workplace, so it's not like I'm a boss talking down to her, and I definitely don't want to make her feel bad or embarrass her. However, it's to the point where others are mentioning it and it's starting to hinder our productivity. Suggestions? | Coworker keeps removing her shoes and her feet smell. Clients and other coworkers notice. How do we tell her? |
t3_ucyw8 | AskReddit | Can you help a crip out? | Hi Reddit!
So let me start off by saying I know how much a lot of us feel about giving relationship advice. But to be completely honest, I don't really have anyone to turn to. I'm a 19 y/o girl with cerebral palsy. I have to add that I am very insecure about it so dating hasn't been easy. But, I have been dating a 20 y/o guy for the last month. Everything has been going great up until this past weekend.
I invited him to go to my family's cabin for a "sleep over". (we have not had sex yet, we have gotten to 3rd base but that was about it. So, I thought this trip would make sure it would happen. Well, we drank, he smoked and we had a great time. Then, he took me to his friend's house and we hung out there for a couple hours. Afterwards, we went back to the cabin around 2am. After some kissing and minor touching, I excused myself to go put on some lingerie.
We get to the bedroom and I thought it was finally going to happen. This is what I have been waiting for. We were finally 100% alone(we both still live at home.) But we only did what we have been doing the past few weeks. I didn't even get just the tip. Which left me wondering if there's something wrong with me.? My greatest fear is that it has to do with my slight physical disability, which would honestly break my heart. | Took guy I've been dating on a mini getaway.., didn't even get just the tip. |
t3_nxnln | relationship_advice | I really need a ruling on this one... | So last night, while my girlfriend was flipping through the family calender that I got for Christmas with all of my relatives birthdays and everything. To her horror, she discovered that we are related. It turns out that her Dad's first cousin married my Aunt. So my first cousins are her second cousins through opposing bloodlines. This really freaked her out, but I wasn't really that upset by it since the relationship seems so obscure and it isn't by blood. I need your help with two things:
1. What is the name of our relationship through family? Our best guess was third cousins once removed but neither of us are too sure about that.
2. Is this really a close enough relationship that it is wierd or even wrong for us to be dating? | I just found out that my girlfriend and I are related through marriage. What does that mean? |
t3_tm80i | AskReddit | Is there a reason behind the similarities in teenage writing? | By this I mean that style of poetry written by teenagers, whereby one poem is almost identical to another in terminology and themes.
I'm guessing the wording is easily explained by the possible, at the time, limited vocabulary but how is it that identical themes are used throughout in this age group's writing and only a few select topics are chosen to write about love/depression/weird-twisted-hate?
Considering teenage tastes differ greatly in terms of music, film, sport etc why is this medium seemingly so narrow, or is there something obvious I'm missing.
If you check out /r/poetry here, or most other online poetry forums, you will not see a great variety in the content of the submissions and to me it's always seem somewhat weird and I don't know whether it's a simple case of maturity (or lack of). | Why is most teenage poetry indistinguishable from other teenage poetry? |
t3_2yrdos | tifu | Tifu by being painfully shy | I read a story here about some poor sap that brushed his teeth with lube by accedent and it reminded me of a similar story of mine. I had just moved in with my boyfriend, and after a great sex filled day we both went into the bathroom to wash up. Most of my stuff was still in luggage bags so I ran off to grab my tooth paste. I ran back into the bathroom, squeezed a good amount on the brush and started brushing. I instantly knew it felt weird, and tasted even weirder. I looked at the "toothpaste" and discovered it was actually hydrocortisone cream (itch cream) since my boyfriend was standing close to me but hadn't noticed my fuck up I was to embarrassed to say anything or act suspicious so I kept brushing like everything was fine. I spit it out and tried to rinse up mouth out but the taste stuck with me all day. It took me two years to tell him. | brushed my teeth with nasty white stuff because of my boyfriend. |
t3_1jl6is | relationships | My gf [20f] cheated on me [21m], claims it wasnt her fault because she was drunk | We've been together 8 months. Ive pieced this story together from her, her friends and the guy she cheated on me with. This is what happened: Gf gets pissed at me for not coming out to a club with her and her friends. Gets SUPER drunk, to the point where she passes out for a half hour inside the club. While there, she grinds and makes out with a guy.
What follows is: jumps into the same cab as the guy + his friends. He takes her upstairs (she can walk by herself) and lays down in the guest bed. She "passes out". He lays next to her and she wakes up. She asks the guy for sex, for about 10 minutes. He refuses as he has no protection. She asks him to finger her. She takes her pants/panties off voluntarily. Finally, they start making out + he fingers her, but no sex. She was coherent, eyes open, speaking fairly clearly but in fragments and kept asking him to fuck her.
She claims she was so wasted that it wasnt her fault and that he took advantage of her. I know people react differently to alcohol, so id like your opinion on this, as terrible as this whole thing sounds, should I forgive her? She says she doesnt remember large parts of what happened (the guy filled in a lot of it) It took her 2 months to admit to this, and she lied about what really happened until I drilled her for a bit. | Gf almost had sex with someone, claims it wasnt intentional as she was so drunk, wondering if what she says its true |
t3_3gn99h | relationships | I [23M] am Bi and in the closet, but I blatantly hit on my friend [21M] who is straight(?). He hangs out with me alone...a lot. | Time for a throw away... As the title states, I'm Bi but in the closet. I have a friend of a few months who I am ridiculously attracted to, the only problem is he is straight... I think.
I hit on him so much and make so many gay remarks, even in text messages both sober and drunk (although they are much more to the point when I'm drunk). He has for the most part acknowledged I hit on him and has even made the statement some where along the lines of "I wouldn't doubt it if you were gay", to which I changed the subject.
This gets complicated for me because through everything, he still invites me to dinner with just him. Hell, he has even came to my house and we cooked dinner together...just us. We do so many activities alone that he asks me to do with him. Im just so confused. I cant tell if he is interested and just scared or just wants an honest friend.
It isnt easy for me to come out either. But that's for a different story. Please any advice would be appreciated! | Im bi (in the closet), attracted to my staright friend. Not sure what he is looking for. |
t3_34nt81 | relationships | Long term relationship, first time I've [28 M] started having feelings for someone other than my [28 F] girlfriend. | We've been together for a year. We live together, we have a lot in common. When I met her my world changed, we both have the same fears and flaws and we just clicked, we fell in love pretty quickly and never looked back.
A few months in though, I started to realize I might not be that attracted to her (physically). Through no fault of her own, obviously, that physical spark just kinda went out. We still love each other, but we haven't had sex in about three months.
It's sorta like living with a really great best friend.
Since we've been together though, I never had feelings at all for other women (and I have a lot of female friends, in fact being with her made it easier for me to have those relationships, because all that sexual tension just evaporated. I only had eyes for her).
Now, one of my female friends from work (who is also in a long term relationship) is starting to get a little flirty. Maybe she is, maybe she isn't, but either way I'm **intensely** attracted to her, not just physically but emotionally. Just being around her makes my whole day, she's funny and smart and outgoing. We're not as similar as my GF and I, in fact we contrast in a lot of ways, but perhaps because of that, I find her irresistible.
Now we haven't done anything or even talked about our feelings (I don't know if my female friend feels the same way, but I suspect she does, long periods of silence w/ eye contact, smiling at me from across the office, texting me constantly throughout the day). And I'm not even sure that I would want to end my current relationship to be with her if it came to that.
I'm just extremely confused by this sudden influx of intense physical and emotional attraction for someone outside my relationship. I can't tell if it's because there are things I'm not getting from inside my relationship, or if it's because there *really is* something special about this other girl.
I'm just very confused by all of this and would love some advice. | I think I'm falling for someone outside my long term relationship and 1.) I'm not sure if I should pursue this other relationship and give up on the one I'm in, or 2.) if this the result of some problems in my current relationship I should try to address. |
t3_2mk1eo | relationship_advice | 23m 22f: weird thing on twitter | So I have an amazing girlfriend. We are 9 months into our relationship. No large issues worth noting. However, I recently went through her Twitter account. Nothing too weird. However, one tweet has been destroying our relationship. A few weeks into our relationship she tweeted about missing someone Far away. She used to talk to a guy from a different state. I brought this up to her and she said she didn't remember tweeting it and that she would never tweet about a guy. She was away from her family at this time too, so she said it was probably about her sister. This is honestly destroying our relationship. She has sworn on her family that this was not about a guy. I don't know what to believe anymore. I think to myself, why would you tweet something like that when you're in a relationship if everyone can see your account. Any advice? Similar situations etc | girlfriend tweeted something that worries me not sure what to believe |
t3_hjzwh | AskReddit | Should I kick my bosses ass!? | Redditors, I come to you posing a question of grave importance (to me and my career)!
My boss has invited me to go golfing and play some tennis with him this Friday. I've already agreed to go, so my question is:
* Should I kick his ass in both of these sports to seem competent?
* Should I play down to his level as to seem respectful and or even with him?
* Or let him kick my ass so he feels good about himself?
The reason i say this is because, i have been playing golf for 5 years, and i played in college. I average around a 78-84 depending on the course. Tennis, I am actually a registered Professional (USPTA certified teacher) and am quite confident in myself in the sport. | I am a tennis pro and almost a scratch (hits par on the course) golfer, should I beat the shit out of my boss or let him win? |
t3_3qhl7f | tifu | TIFU by making an unfortunate pocket call | Called a buddy of mine today. Finishing up the call thinking "Wow, I gotta piss." As the call was finishing up walk over to the toilet. As soon as the call was over tap the end call button once, twice. OK, now I rush to put the phone in my pocket. Begin taking a piss with the power of a thousand suns. The torrent produced a roar that could certainly be heard far away. As I relieve myself I mutter "Ahhhhh...God that feels good" fairly loudly, as no one else was in my apartment. I also am doing that thing where I aim my piss in circles and the sound seems to almost have a Doppler effect to it. As my piss is coming to an end and the roar is dying down I hear a girl's voice "Hello? btc3399?" Pull phone out of my pocket. It's the cutie girl I was trying to get to know. The phone was only maybe 15 inches away from the toilet. The sound was unmistakable. Call time was 52 seconds. I hang up immediately in shame. | pocket dialed cutie girl while muttering and taking a piss |
t3_3gf7n8 | relationships | My [22 F] boyfriend [26 M] of just over a year doesn't post pictures of us on social media | Over the past year, my boyfriend and I have gone from a long distance relationship over 10 months, to living together since May. Our current living situation is temporary as I move home at the end of the month. Today, we got in a fight about how he doesn't post any pictures of us on Facebook and I'm looking for some guidance.
I have found him with Tinder on his phone 4 times in the last year. I have looked in the app and know that he wasn't talking to anyone when he had it on his phone which is the one reason we are still together. It's obviously a sore subject for me, as he never really gives a reason as to why he downloads that app besides it being a confidence booster for him when he sees who likes his profile.
Since moving in with him, he hasn't posted any pictures of us together on Facebook. Now this wouldn't normally bother me in any other situation, but it bothered me because in the back of my mind, I wonder if he doesn't want pictures just in case some girl from Tinder sees his Facebook and sees that he has a girlfriend. I know this sounds horrible, but is it justified? I know he isn't up to anything now, but it just started bothering me today.
When I asked him why, he got mad at me and told me he "just isn't that type of guy" and also said we don't have any pictures together he actually likes. The strong reaction to my questioning him also made me feel awful. What should I do?? | My boyfriend has been caught with Tinder on his phone and also doesn't post pictures of us on Facebook, should this bother me? |
t3_4zpspz | relationships | I [23F] haven't kissed this guy [25 M] for the dumbest reason | We've been going out for weeks. Everything's going great. Last weekend he took me to a play for my birthday--I was coughing and drippy and gross, and he was STILL super sweet and attentive. When I turned down our first kiss so I wouldn't get him sick, he understood (and was probably grateful). I've mostly recovered and we're going out again tomorrow...but when he heard me still coughing over the phone, he was like-- "Oh, you're still sick?" And he sounded a teeny bit disappointed.
I need to get over this PRONTO, haha. I really want to kiss this guy tomorrow. What are your secret dating ninja tips for getting rid of a lingering cough within 24 hours? Or alternatively, how have you coped with being sick right before a promising date? | I want to avoid coughing all over my date before our first kiss. Only have about 24 hours. Any tips? |
t3_1g025w | relationships | Why dont i [52M] pack my bag and walk out of my 14 year marriage with my [40F] wife? | 3 kids. Marriage is in trouble for years now. Serious trouble. Whenever i try to speak i am yelled at, i am told to go look in the mirror, and that no-one would ever stay with me if not for the money.
Now, why do i stay? I got self-esteem issues, nerdiness, i guess a trait of aspergers. I have enough money to do what i want to. Why am i so afraid of walking out of the door?
Is it the fear of loneliness? I have been lonely before, i know it sucks, but it is always an opportunity to come clear, to work on myself, to get in better shape and more confident. Why the hell am i so afraid?
The kids? I guess they are better off without the stuff they see at home. | I should walk out, but i dont. |
t3_2f6720 | relationships | My boyfriend [17M] wants to break up with me [17F] after 2 years, and I'm terrified. | I have some psychological problems (a big part of that is abandonment issues) that I've been dealing with for a long time, and when I finally started making progress and getting better, he says he might want to break up for the 4th time in our relationship.
The other times were because I wasn't getting much better and I was treating him badly, but we never broke up because we always felt we fit so well together. We have so much in common and we have all the same plans for the future and the same views.
I love him so much and I really feel like we could spend our lives together.
But after saying he was thinking of leaving me, a day later he said he decided to stay with me. But then last night, another day later, he called me late at night acting all weird, not saying very much at all and then saying that he didn't like the way he was feeling and that he wanted to talk to me in person the next weekend (he lives an hour away so we only see each other on Saturdays) about something.
He wouldn't tell me anything else, like what he wanted to talk about, or if he was breaking up with me or not. When I said, "you're breaking up with me, aren't you?" he'd respond with "you don't know that for sure."
I'm terrified of him leaving me, I feel sick and I can't eat.
Do you think he's planning to break up with me, and if so, what can I do to convince him to stay? Or how can I move on from him, since he's become my best friend and we're closer than I've ever been with anyone before? | How can I convince my boyfriend of 2 years (who's probably going to break up with me this weekend) to stay with me? |
t3_1tskfv | relationships | Me [20M] with my Ex girlfriend [19F] 1.5 year, I'm not sure if I actually miss her, or just lonely. | Broke up with my girlfriend in September after a year and a half, thought I was done with her. Just found out she is with another guy. I can't get the sick feeling out of my stomach of he in bed with another guy.
We always got along really well, hardly no fighting. But sometimes she was just to clingy to me. It just annoyed me so much at sometimes. The past month I have been texting and snapchatting her kinda regularly. During these messages we would flirt pretty often. Then probably three days later I see on Facebook she just started dating this guy.
I think I would be able to get her back if really wanted to, but I don't to hurt again like I did before. Plus, I'm moving 2 hours away to go to school. | I thought I moved on, now I'm jealous. |
t3_egw0j | AskReddit | That one time you didn't take precautions... | and the worst possible thing happens :/
Story:
So usually when I buy something expensive like a computer or something breakable like glasses or a cell phone, I buy the extended warranty and etc with it as well. However, I never actually needed the extra coverage ever and started to see it as a waste of money.
So last weekend I wanted to get a new ipod (don't have a multimedia player) and so browse through the selections and get the new 32gig ipod touch. I bought a screen protector and a cheapo rubberized back cover but since I never needed the warranty before on any other thing, I decide to skip the applecare and everything to save $50 or so. As I'm walking out of the store trying to put the back cover on, I trip, the ipod goes flying, hits the railing, and falls down two floors on the mall and shatters on the shoppers below. :[ Thankfully the Apple store decided to replace it and I'm now waiting for a new touch to arrive. | Always bought warranty before; first time I didn't buy, I dropped my ipod down two floors of a shopping mall minutes after buying. |
t3_3w01gk | legaladvice | [CA] Was my backpack legally searched? | So yesterday I was called into the office. My boyfriend was seen vaping (when I was with him I guess, although I don't remember that). I was not told this until after these events.
I was called in first and told to bring my backpack. The principal asked if he could search my backpack and I asked why. He repeated himself— "Can I search your backpack." I said go ahead and placed my things in front of him. He pulled all of my belongings out of my backpack and put them back in.
The principal then made me empty my pockets and pat myself down.
My boyfriend was called in after me (despite him being the one actually vaping, I was just a bystander). He was asked to empty his pockets and he did. The principal then asked him to search through his own things— he never touched my boyfriend's backpack. My boyfriend did not have to pat himself down either.
Was this okay? I feel violated. I hadn't done anything wrong, yet I was searched. I was forced to pat myself down in front of a male administrator in a closed room with no one else there. Honestly I would have let this go, but my boyfriend had such a different experience. | I got searched and had to pat myself down because my boyfriend was seen vaping. Did my principal violate any rules? |
t3_1ywsnc | relationships | How to initiate an amicable separation? | How can I get my partner to understand that we just aren't good together and I want out - while still leaving him in one whole piece? We are very different people. We don't see each other very often. And I need a relationship with someone that truly accepts me for who I am. I've been through a bad divorce before, and I'm haunted by the misery my ex felt. I never wanted to get married again, but when we had a good stretch, I agreed to it (totally my F-up). We've been married for 2 years, together for 7 and we are in our late 30's. I know a breakup is never easy. I know this is the right thing. We've both felt frustrated and unhappy at various times. I'd say at it's best I've been moderately content, but rarely happy. I think he would stay with me forever, but I'm not ok with living a life of mediocre happiness with a friend. I'd rather be alone. | I want out, but I don't want to make it harder than it has to be. |
t3_33qj93 | tifu | TIFU by telling my girlfriend she's flat chested | One lovely evening, my girlfriend and I were laying on the couch at my place of residence. Being the silly sixteen year old male I am, when my girlfriend took off her shirt, after we made out for a bit, and asked, "why do I have such a potbelly after eating?" (mind you, she's particularly petite, and at that time had no signs of potbellyness) I decided to quip saying, "Sarah, you're amazing. Potbellied? You're absolutely not. Flat chested in fact." She looked at me and I realized what I said. I meant to say flat stomached, but alas, I guess my mind decided that 'flat chested' was the best thing to say. She promptly sat down, got particularly sad, and I had to pause *Princess Mononoke* in order to console her. Explained what I meant to say, and she felt better, though! But no more sexy time after that, only movie watching. | ^^^it'slikefoursentencespls |
t3_27il0d | tifu | TIFU by forgetting my girlfriends birthday. | First things first let me say that I am very bad at remembering important dates. Today was like any normal day, I woke up, showered, and ate breakfast. During breakfast, my girlfriend kept on looking at me like she was expecting something. I thought to myself, "what the hell is she doing? Did I promise her something last night but I don't remember?" As I left for work, she asked about dinner at her parents that night. Of course I said yes (her parents are hilarious, coolest bunch of folks in the world.) She said dress nice, but I thought nothing of it. I go through my 9-5 job (meat department at a grocery store) and finally get off work. As I check my phone before leaving for home, I read a text from my gf saying "Surprise me tonight". Of course I'm thinking after we get home from her parents house that she wants to do the sexy times, so I am excited. When I get home she is already at her parents, so I get dressed and head off to her parents. During the 45 minute drive, I keep thinking of why my girlfriend was acting so weird. When I pull up to the drive-way, I groan because I read the sign on her parents door, "Happy 24th Birthday"...lets call her Jen. At this point, I have no choice but to walk in and eat dinner next to my furious girlfriend of 3 years, and face her ungodly wrath at home. | I fucked up today by forgetting my girlfriends birthday despite the obvious signs she gave me. |
Subsets and Splits
No saved queries yet
Save your SQL queries to embed, download, and access them later. Queries will appear here once saved.