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t3_33g8h9 | tifu | TIFU by blacking out | Sorry for any formatting issues, I'm on my phone. So this fuck up happened this past weekend. I go to a University in the United States. My girlfriend lives about an hour away and comes up on weekends when she's not busy with work. On this particular weekend we happened to obtain a 30 pack of beer and 2 handles of vodka. Over the course of Friday and Saturday night, we finished all of this with another friend. Now here's where the fuck up happened. On Saturday night we were playing beer pong and taking shots, being quite drunk, I decided to take my girlfriends phone and text all her friends, asking them if they would fuck me. I still don't know why I did this, or why I thought it was a good idea at the time, but it happened. I ended up sexting one of her friends while I was blackout drunk, on her phone. I didn't delete the messages and I still didn't even know who I was texting. My girlfriend woke up in the morning and checked her texts from the night before, only to see what I had done. She was chill about it, and we still had sex that night, but I'm worried she may be planning some punishment. | Blacked out, still got pussy |
t3_2k1ymd | relationships | Me [18M] gone to university, leaving my partner [20F] sleepless, ill and without eating. | Me and my girlfriend have been together for a little over a year and a half, and in that time allot between us has happened. Due to this, we are a strong couple who love each-other incredibly. But something new has arose and something which is a bit different. I'm new so be kind.
This subreddit requires no wall of text so i'll try keep it short.
Not too long ago I left home to come to university about a five hour drive up country. (college to my American brothers and sisters) Throughout our relationship different things to do with health have come and gone yet some stayed.
My other half developed Insomnia and can only sleep if i'm in the same room, and that still can be a struggle. Eating is also a big hardship for her too, it makes the poor girl sick most of the time and that's obviously off putting for her, especially as she has no gag reflex, so choking is common. When I was back home we spent allot of time together as we didn't live too far away from each-other. She loved to cook for us so eating wasn't so bad as she may as well cook for herself too, she did and kept a good weight.
Now i'm here. My girlfriend has had near to no sleep, minimal amount of food and an illness which constantly thins her blood leading to other illnesses. She can't heal as she can't sleep. She has only two friends who are complete A** h**es that never see hear and when they ask to meet, they put a plan with someone else on top of that leaving her on her own.
The poor girl is alone, very ill, at a very low weight. (she has seen her doctor and he has helped as much as he can and very well at that) I just feel that it's my fault. Nothing I can do to help. I call her every day at half eight to see what she has done in the day and show her that i'm still in love and still there for her. But it's not enough. Help?
I'm sorry for any grammar/spelling issues and lack of writing capability. Just posting this helps. And thanks to anyone who read. | Girlfriend left at home as I go into higher education leaving her alone, sleepless and sick till I come home after three years. |
t3_170t6k | relationships | [M18] having trouble leading a conversation with [F18] girlfriend. | Hey guys. I'm having a bit of trouble in my relationship. I don't know whether I should worry or not, but I think I should because my GF seems bothered by it. Essentially, we are a LDR that started as a normal relationship, except it is my first one. She's really special to me and I love her, but for whatever reason, I always have a hard time talking to her over Whats App and Skype and whatnot. I feel like I don't have a really interesting life, nor anything she's really like to hear about; we're both in college, and while she goes to a big college with a big reputation, I'm going to a tiny college that's just started. She has way more going on for her, while I'm stuck at university from 9 AM to 10 PM most days, either coding or doing math or gaming while I'm busy. She's a Poli-Sci major, so no connection there. What makes it worse is the fact I'm in Spain and she's in the US. By the time I have free time I feel tired and just want to shower, have dinner and sleep. It's not necessarily limited to her, I've never liked small talk (it feels dumb and I know people are not interested, not even your SO). It just feels frustrating, because I know she wants me to talk more but I feel like I can't. What do you guys suggest I could do?
We've been going on for... almost ten months, anniversary is March 31st. | Having trouble keeping conversation over text, want to make my GF happy by being better at it. What can I do? |
t3_p41wr | AskReddit | I have to say, r/atheism, you have prepared me well. | I met my first theist who openly rejected evolution and the lot. I was thrilled when he began to talk to me about it.
So I opened up my Can - O - Knowledge and dumbfounded him and his Christian friend. He eventually just dropped out of the conversation and went to sleep. (Mind you, it was like 2 in the morning) But me and his friend kept talking.
As it turns out, I know and understand a lot more than I previously thought. He learned a great deal and probably got him to think about it more.
And I have to say, this is all very | but my main point is to thank all of you atheist redditors who helped me to have the knowledge to defeat a theist. |
t3_3pu8kn | tifu | TIFU by being accidently, crudely sexist. | I work at an FBO that is decently busy and I rarely see any female pilots. By rare I mean maybe 1 a month. This is no excuse but it created my assumption.
A jet arrived this evening for a showcase tomorrow. A couple gentlemen get off, the pilots, and tell us to go check out the aircraft. A lady, the flight attendent/sales rep, was sitting by the stairs and told us to come in and don't be shy.
As my coworker and I were complementing the sleek cockpit she mentioned that if you can use a smart phone you can fly the plane. Funny, she's making a dig on the pilots I thought. People in aviation generally give one another shit.
A minute later as I'm about to get off I ask her "Do the pilots ever let you start up the jet since it's as easy as using a smartphone?". With this she looked at me confused and said "What?". I asked again in not so many words. She then informed me she was the pilot. I apologized and got off promptly.
One of the men was the sales rep and the woman was the pilot. Foot. In. Mouth.
I've never said anything this bad to a customer of any sex or race in 6 years of customer service jobs. Sexism is already bad in aviation so I wrote a letter of apology in hopes it makes it slightly better. | implied woman on aircraft must be flight attendent. |
t3_476rmc | tifu | TIFU by being in too much of a hurry | Reddit, let me take you back to the wonders of fifth grade; where magic or some shit happens. Idk.
Anyways, back in fifth grade we had received this pamphlet from our teacher stating that there was a contest going on. And all we had to do was write an essay on Eco-waste. With the grand prize being a laptop, so I was excited. So I wrote the dankest paper ever, had my teacher read it she fixed a few things. And we did that a couple times. The paper was ready to turn in, I pressured my dad to go out and get some stamps so I could mail it in since we didn't have any. Idiot five year old me is so excited to go stick the envelope in the outgoing box that I forget to put the main part of the contest in it. THE FUCKING ESSAY! And there was no way I could get it back out because the mailboxes were [this kind]( | Wrote dank essay, no laptop for me. |
t3_22ttrc | jobs | I'm an international student who majored in Writing and Film and really needs a job when she graduates--which is in a month. | Hi, guys.
Okay, so I'm an international student from India (thanks a ton, country, for having sent what's about a million students to the US on hopeful visas) currently at DePauw University. I'm majoring in English Writing and Film studies, and all set to graduate here in a month. I have a 3.87 GPA, and am a member of Phi Beta Kappa--the oldest and most prestigious honor society in the States. I'm fluent in Hindi, French, Urdu and Punjabi, have experience in production and writing, and have worked in places as diverse as Cosmopolitan Magazine to Harper Collins (both in India). I've also done some IT-related stuff at school, and a lot of video production.
What's driving me crazy now is the job hunt--nearly every job I apply to has a "must be authorized to work in the United States" restriction, and I'm basically driving myself crazy depressed. I want to be a TV comedy writer, ultimately, but to stay in the United States I'd require a work visa--and no one is just about to hand me one. I'm turning to you, Redditors, for any advice on companies that take in liberal arts graduates not intending to work in IT/Engineering. Is there anything? I'm a stellar worker, and I don't just want my dreams shot down for the simple reason that I wasn't born here. I'd appreciate any help, guys. | I'm Indian and sick of being from a country where I can't realize my dreams. Is there a job for me here? |
t3_373cdo | relationships | Our (27f/25m) wedding is Saturday, worried groomsman (25m) might invite husbands old ex (26f) | So to be clear, if she had been a different ex, I would still be weirded out, but not so scared. Husband and I dated for a while in college, back in 09. She came into the scene, and things went bad. There was definitely emotional cheating if not actual physical cheating- depending on your definition of cheating. She sat in his lap a lot, held hands, kissed him, they would make a point of hanging out when I wasn't around. I don't know a lot of the actual details of what went down back then, and I no longer care.
I just don't want her at my wedding. My husband has made no particular expression that he wants her there, and has made a point of actively avoiding her if there was the slightest possibility their paths might cross. His groomsman is a great friend of both the ex and my husband, and I'm worried he will bring her as a +1, as she is in the area at the same time we're having our wedding. No-one has specifically told him not to, but I've been assured my my husband and a bridesmaid (who was a friend of both groomsman and husband in college) that he wouldn't do that. But without being specifically told l, I'm still worried.
Am I being irrational? Should I just let it go? And furthermore, if she does show up, am I right to ask her to leave? What should I do? | worried husbands ex gf will be invited to the wedding by a groomsman who is a good friend of them both. I really dislike her, and don't want her to be there under any circumstance. |
t3_4rthqu | relationships | I [18 M] have a pseudo-girlfriend [19 F]. We're not quite dating yet and there is another person [16F]. | Right into the thick of it. I have known a girl (referred to as E) since the beginning of college. We just finished freshman year together, going through the stages of acquaintance to friend to best friend until, one day, we realized we had feelings for eachother.
However, this was two weeks before summer started, and we were going home to different states. E and I decided to not officially date over the summer, due to a variety of reasons including being single for a while, as we both recently got out of long relationships. But we talk every day, and two weeks in (about a month ago) I booked a plane ticket to go visit her for a week.
My problem - and please tell me if I'm being a complete idiot - is that while I'm back home a coworker and I have been getting closer. I'll probably know this girl (let's call her A) for a total of two months and then I'll never see her again.
I'm torn about hooking up with A. I really care about E, but we were clear about NOT being a couple this summer. I think that if something happened with A I wouldn't tell her. A also knows this would be just a summer thing - probably even just a one time thing.
Anyways, I have a dinner with A tomorrow and I'm leaving to see E in exactly one week. If I do this, does that make me a piece of shit? I know I would feel at least a little bit guilty. I have no way of knowing if E is doing the same back where she is, though. And in the end, once we start dating (I guess labeling ourselves exclusive), a fling with A would never need to be brought up. Just like I wouldn't need to hear about anything she did this summer. Thoughts?
As a sidenote, I want to clarify that I will not/would not be having sex with A. I am too into E and also would like not to commit statutory rape. | There is a budding relationship put on hold for the summer. Is it wrong to hook up with another girl in the limbo state that I'm in with the first girl? If I do, will I regret it? |
t3_1vlm3s | dating_advice | 2 dates, going on third. need help interpreting the situation | Please help.
I don't know what to make of the following situation. There is this girl i went on 2 dates with. I am very bad in signs, or giving signs, so im planning to straight up tell her the next date how beautifull and funny she is.
The last thing i want, is to be friend-zoned by this girl.
I can't even tell if the previous date went ok, but the fact she maybe wants to eat something next week is a positive sign. And frankly the only sign i recognize. I asked her out the second and third time. We didn't kiss yet.
I am sorry if i sound confused, because i am. I have been living alone for 15 years, and never had a relationship. I don't have any experience so this stuff is very new for me. | do woman need some sort of conformation that they are beautifull? |
t3_46rlor | legaladvice | (Ontario, Canada) Got into a road rage altercation, how much trouble could I get into for this? | I passed a car that was weaving all over the highway, I held my horn as I passed so that the driver would know I was there and hopefully stay in her own lane. She ended up following me into town and at a red light, she got out and came up to my window and started yelling at me.
I wanted to drive away but she was standing too close, and I panicked. I pushed my car door open as hard as I could, hit her with it which made her stumble backwards (but not fall). Then I drove off, but she caught up to me again and followed until I pulled into the cop station. The cop station's doors were locked and she was getting out of her car again so I got back in my car and took off. | Forcefully opened my car door, hitting a road rager who was screaming at me. |
t3_1xljcn | relationships | Me [21 F] with my friends [20+ M&F] ~4 mo., don't invite me to hang out, but send pictures | **Some Background:**
I moved across the US two years ago due to family issues. I took a year off from college to get in-state tuition rates at the college and was able to start college last fall. I went in without knowing anyone, so these are the only friends I have right now.
**The Problem:**
I made friends with this guy in my biology class right away. He introduced me to some of his friends and now we all study and hang out together in the library between classes. I even put a board game night together about a month ago and everyone had a great time.
The problem I'm having is every weekend I get 20+ snapchats of this group hanging out and playing games together. These come from the guy I originally made friends with and two others from this group of ~5 people. Pictures and videos of them laughing and having a great time. And I wasn't invited. It wasn't even mentioned near me. I feel like it's rude to ask for an invitation and I think that's how it would come across if I said anything, so I haven't commented on how this bothers me. Am I being too sensitive? How do I talk to them about this? Is four months too short to be expecting invitations to hang out? I just don't know! | Friends send me pictures of them hanging out without inviting me and I don't know how to respond. |
t3_frfhp | AskReddit | Want to create a special engagement ring for my girlfriend. Help. | She loves Lord of the Rings and many moons ago she lit up at the idea of having "The One Ring" be her engagement ring. I'm sure plenty of nerds get that but what I want to have happen is I want the elvish engraving to be filled with a color changing material (think, mood ring) that will change from clear to red or yellow. So she can take the ring off - put it in her hand and the writing lights up (mimicking putting the ring in fire)
Anyone have ANY IDEA how to go about having this done? I live in the U.S. (Southern California to be specific)
Any customer jeweler recommendations or sites would be appreciated :D | Want to make the words engraved in a ring glow - Dunno how. |
t3_2d0wnk | relationships | Me [29 M] with my SO [28 F] of 3 years, should I be doubting marriage? | We've been dating for 3 years and currently live together.
Someone once told me that you should be 100% sure you want to marry someone that there should be no shred of a doubt. But I dont feel 100% about taking it to the next level.
She has some body image issues I guess. Although she is fit and beautiful, she is constantly making negative comments about her own body/face, etc. She used to be semi-bulimic and acted like it wasn't a big deal. When I would confront her about it she would get upset and then promise she wouldnt do it again. The problem was, she was really good at doing it quickly and secretly. I dont think she has done it for quite some time (probably over a year) but that always freaked me the fuck out.
She also has a bit of a temper and will blow up over seemingly small things. The thing that bothers me most is that after these blow ups, she'll calm down and act like nothing happened. And then be confused as to why Im still upset about her treating me poorly.
Lastly, sometimes she talks down to people we encounter. Like cashiers or cabs drivers or whatever. I know that sometimes she might just be having a bad day but other times Im concerned that that is who she really is.
Im not saying Im perfect either. Although Ive never cheated on her, Ive always been attracted to women. Part of me is worried that just by having thoughts about other women means that I shouldnt be thinking about marriage. Some days Im like "shes the one" and other days Im like "wtf am I doing?"
Clearly we have some issues and Im just wondering if anyone has similar experiences or any advice for me? I really do love her but dont know what to do. I feel like my window of deciding decreases everyday and I dont want to lead her on if shes ready for marriage. | Sometimes my SO is mean to me/other people. She has low self esteem and it bums me out. Sometimes I think about other woman but have never acted on it. Is this normal? Is marriage even a question at this point? |
t3_wcvs9 | AskReddit | Which notable figures do you have personal beef with? | About a year and a half ago, Matthew McConaughey was at my school to promote his fitness program that he supports. I was on the cross country team at the time, and after we finished practice, our coach told us that Matthew McConaughey was gonna talk to us. I wasn't a huge fan of him, but it'd still have been cool to meet the guy and have a chat. We were told that he wasn't quite ready to meet us yet, so we went into the locker room and changed. By the time we left the locker room, Matthew McConaughey had already left. I wasn't heartbroken over it, but it was still kind of a dick move to stand up a bunch of high school kids.
Does anyone else have PERSONAL reasons to dislike notable figures (note: not "I hate Bieber cause his music sucks and he seems like a prick")? | Matthew McConaughey stood up my cross country team. |
t3_4urer3 | relationships | Me [27F] with my friend [23M] of 2 years, won't take citation ticket | Hi there, I brought a couple of friends with me to the beach. We were with another group of people, so about 16 of us total.
A good friend of mine was drinking as were a few others. Most of the girls, including me did not drink.
The police came by and gave us 4 tickets for drinking in public. They were trying to be lenient and not give everyone a ticket so we had to choose among the group who had to take the 4 tickets. My friend who was with me refused to take a ticket because he said he was a registered stock broker and this could seriously affect his job. We got in argument because he was one of the few people that did drink so he should take a ticket and he did not bother to hide the bottle once he was finished with it.
I along with another girl had to take the fall even though we did not drink. Everyone split the cost of the ticket, including my friend.
I tried to explain to my friend how the situation was inherently unfair, but he keeps giving me excuses how it would effect his job and that he would need a lawyer so it would cost the group even more money.
I looked up the regulatory agency (Finra) that would determine if this needed to be disclosed to his firm, and sure enough, small things like citations (eg parking tickets, fines for drinking) do not need to be echoed. Misdemeanors and felonies related to security fraud, theft, and generally anything that could potentially endanger client-facing relationships need to be reported. So everything he said was basically wrong. I was on the phone with a rep of Finra to confirm this. | How to explain to friend that it was unfair I took a ticket for him even though he drank in public? |
t3_4maugo | relationships | My brother [16M] playing too much games and me [18M] | Ik my parents are strict and stuff but I think he plays too much. After school he comes home and he's constantly on the computer playing and switching tabs so my parents don't find out (they do and they just yell at him but he keeps playing ). Tbh he's probably addicted like he'll cry when he doesn't get to play in the weekends (I feel really bad but idk what to do). I was exactly in the same situation when I was his age and i regret wasting all the time I did on games but how can I make him understand that. Anytime I tell I tell him something he's like "you did the same thing when you were my age" and I tell him do you really want to regret it like me but he doesn't really care. I want to change the password for the computer but then he'll pretend to do homework and just play. | brother plays too much. How can I make him not be addicted anymore and how can I help him? |
t3_2lnvym | relationships | Me [20 M] with my FWB/ best friend [20 F] duration 3 months, help me figure out what to do! | So at the beginning of this last semester on school my friend and i (lets call her maddy) decided to become friends with benefits it started out fine and we agreed to not let this get in the way of our friend ship. but we both agreed that we were okay with seeing other people.
So when we were alone we were more of a couple but when we were with our friends we acted like just friends. but as the last three months progressed i began to have feelings for her but i just pushed them aside and didnt say anything. in the mean time she met a guy though work and started talking. the weekend before halloween i finally said to myself that i do like her and would date her.
halloween weekend we went out and one night she got too drunk and took her home and took care of her. the next night we went out and invited the other guy. later on in the night as were looking for a party our group got split up and it was just us three and she was with this other guy in front of me (as of now she has no idea i actually want anything more than friends with benifits) and they kiss right in front of me. this pisses me off and begin to walk in front of them to make sure i dont see them doing anything. fast forward to the party were at and the guy asks me whats wrong about 10 times and on the last one i tell him whats up, and then storm off because i cant be around these people anymore go home pissed off. about ten minutes later maddy shows up wanting to talk and the othere told her i feeling for her. she then tells me she also has feelings for me and tells me i should have said something sooner (i didnt want to say anything that would jepordize our friendship) and that its too late because of this other guy.
what should i do i really like maddy and our firendship is the most solid one ive ever had but im not sure where to take this!!!! please help me!!
sorry for and grammer or spelling errors im quite drunk wirting this. | sleeping with best friend and developed feelings, now she like some new guy. should i confront her again about my feelings or just go back to how things were and let here date this other guy? |
t3_340ape | relationships | Is an open relationship good? | Hi guys. I (19/M) and my ex-girlfriend (18/F) broke up two weeks ago due to differing directions of the relationship.
It's been a hard time, we've cried, we laughed, we have kissed, but we both know it's coming to an end.
Now, I'm at the point where the whole ordeal has broken my heart into tiny pieces, that I've suppressed how I'm feeling to stop myself getting so upset.
Yesterday, I came to her with an idea... An open relationship! We still see each other, and sleep together, but we are both allowed to sleep with other people. This would continue until a point that one of us feels too attached to continue the open relationship, so we'd discuss the next step.
My question to you is, would you recommend this? Tbh, I do love her a lot, but because of how much this has hurt me over these past two weeks, to the point where my work concentration levels are dropping, I have gained the ability to just turn off how I'm feeling and suppress my emotions. So, would you say it's doable? | split with girlfriend two weeks ago, now I'm asking for an open relationship. Is it workable? |
t3_1t6hqf | relationships | My unofficial GF wants to become exclusive, but her drunk self will likely act the COMPLETE opposite. Help! | Fairly new to posting on reddit so forgive me if I'm in the wrong sub. I'll try to keep it short but detailed. This girl i'v been seeing for a while now wants to become a little bit more then just friends. I would gladly take her up on the offer, she's fantastic and beautiful (28). Only problem is she is a flirty drunk and not just the giggling and light touch kind. She will sometimes make out and grope other people. From what iv seen so far it's only been as a joke with her (f) friends (awesome) but it happens so frequently that I believe there's nothing stoping it from happening with complete strangers.
Iv talked to her about my feelings and She has promised to stop drinking so much and to restrain any desires. Truth is It's a risky case as she lives with a total alcoholic that is a total freak (f) and she's the main reason I'm worried, her ability to influence my SO into doing things is the major concern.
So my question to you reddit should I give this girl a chance knowing her previous record and her flirtation issues, and bite the bullet if she breaks my heart? Or should I just keep her at a certain distance and not pursue a serious relationship? | girlfriend is a very flirty drunk (physical contact and kissing of strangers) she wants to become exclusive but her drunk self will most likely act the opposite. How should handle it. |
t3_2y01iu | relationships | My [20 M] girlfriend [20 F] loves to play games and I'm so tired of it, said I broke her heart | I've been in an incredible three month relationship with a girl who really is the girl of my dreams. We've known each other for a while as friends, but never really got that close, and when we were both single, we both knew we wanted each other and I've never clicked this quickly with a person before. I've been in two relationships before, and no one else has made me feel the way she feels. I actually am so in love with her. Recently, she told me she would be the happiest girl ever if we got married tomorrow, and that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me.
All her life she's had guys chasing her and telling her how amazing she is. She's been in one long term relationship before with a guy who honestly did everything for her and bent backwards for her. She told me he would literally do anything and every time they fought he would take the blame. So she's pretty much used to having guys beg for her and telling her sorry and she knows that because she told me she was spoiled by guys with affection.
I'm a guy who hates begging and I hate doing that type of shit. But when I don't do it, she thinks I don't care about her and she gets so sad. She also loves to play these games where she says she doesn't wanna talk to me. I usually play along at first and "plead" her to talk to me but after 3-4 times of being said no to I honestly get so sick of it and I give up and don't talk to her. Tonight, I didn't text her and she said I broke her heart and she's not talking to me anymore. She said I don't know how much she cares about me and that she's not playing games.
I really don't know what to do, how do I fix this? I love her so much but I don't know if this is just a phase or not but I can't put up with it for that much longer. | Didn't text my girl after she said she didn't want to talk to me, said I broke her heart when I stopped and doesn't know how much she cares about me. |
t3_48l09e | relationships | Me [17M] with my friend[17F]. I'm positive I like her and I'm pretty sure she likes me. What do I do? I'm nervous to mess up and ruin our friendship. | Basically, I've been friends with Dani (the girl) since sophomore year. We're both juniors now in high school. I think she's really cool and really pretty. We talk a lot and I'm pretty positive we mutually flirt. To be honest, maybe I'm overlooking into it and I'm an idiot, but from being on this subreddit for a while, I'm pretty sure it's flirting.
She just got out of a few month relationship with her boyfriend, who I've known since freshman year. They broke up because her friend, basically talked shit about her behind to her boyfriend and caused them to break up because of it. The ex-friend and ex-boyfriend are now dating. I hold no grudges to both sides because it's not my business and not my situation.
We text a good amount and I can always make her laugh and stuff. I'm just not sure what to do, I feel like we've mutually liked each other for a while. We went out on Valentine's with a 3rd mutual friend and she talked about the ex-relationship after the movie when we ate. I want to ask her out but I'm just scared to mess up our friendship or get rejected. Please help, should I just relax and give it more time to see what happens, or should I not wait too long and make a move? | I'm stuck on asking my friend out, even though I'm pretty sure we mutually flirt and I'm slightly less positive we mutually like each other. What should I do? |
t3_zk8jv | relationship_advice | Physical intimacy problems? | Ok so this girl and I are not officially dating but we have been very close friends for more than a year. We hooked up several drunken times but on Thursday we decided to move in the dating direction and hook up consistently.
The first night we did not have sex because she wanted to take it slow as this was a big step for us. I understood and we ended up just making out and cuddling. The next night (last night) things got a little more heated and soon we were both naked. I wanted to take it slow and have a little foreplay but she just wanted me to go in. She actually got mad for me taking so long (literally I was just trying to finger her for like 10 seconds and tried going down on her) and she kinda yelled at me, pretty much killing the mood. She then said that we shouldnt have sex. That obviously pissed me off but then she wouldnt even kiss me afterwards. I didnt understand what I did wrong so I asked her what the deal was. She explained that she is not used to me (I guess her ex just ignored foreplay).
She also told me that it is hard for her to want to have sex with me. She said that even though she desperately wants us to work out, she can't get over the fact that we started out as friends. She said that she loves me but feels like we missed a crucial step in dating because we already have a deep emotional connection with I guess very little physical intimacy.
We are both 21 and I honestly have not had that much success with women. I do not know what to do as after we woke up this morning I tried kissing her but she turned that down and said that she didnt want to talk right now because she doesnt know whats going on. She said she would talk to me later today but that looks doubtful. I guess I just want to know what I should do and if there is a way to fix it. It was a pretty big blow to my self esteem that she couldnt see herself having sex with me sober. | Girl wont have sex with me because we were very close friends but still wants us to date |
t3_plyk7 | AskReddit | Reddit, I'm addicted to masturbation. (Possibly NSFW terminology) | I'll keep this (fairly) short.
When I wake up in the morning, I have to masturbate. Its a need. On days I'm not working or have no company I can do it throughout the day to the point where my manly bits hurt.
I'm not a social recluse. I have a girlfriend and we have sex fairly often - yet I still prefer to masturbate. I can happily masturbate in her presence, but I don't find it nearly as rewarding when she does it to me. (This is including lube or blowjobs.) The lowest point? I have denied sex or 'faked' an orgasm so I can go and masturbate after the chore is done. Its not the girl - she's beautiful, and its happened with partners in the past too.
Basically I know something is wrong with me, but I have no idea how to go about solving it. Does anyone else have the same problem or am I alone? I've accepted I have a big problem and I'm scared the girl won't understand when I basically say 'I love you and all, but I'd rather jerk off.' | I'm addicted to masturbation and its hurting my girlfriend. What do I do? |
t3_1rws3i | relationships | I [20 M] feel like a dumbass. No Contact period for a month, and I did something on accident. | I've been in no contact with my ex for about a month now. Just a few days ago, she actually messaged me on Facebook, saying sorry for hurting/ignoring me. I've been ignoring that text.
Anyway, last night I was on Instagram (I know, I'm supposed to stop following/unfriend her for no contact) and I saw her picture. Like a dumbass, I clicked on the comment button and wrote down what I wanted to say. I didn't intend to post it but when I went to delete the little sentence I had written out, I accidentally pressed the post button.
I'm sure she read the comment before I deleted it, but I just feel lame. A few days prior she sent a long apology, which I'm ignoring, and I accidentally commented on her picture. I'm probably exaggerating but she's probably thinking to herself, "What a loser."
I'm not sure what I'm asking but I feel like I set myself back after all the process I've made on moving on. | No contact with ex for about a month, accidentally commented on her Instagram picture. Damn sure she read it before I deleted it, now I feel like I have to start the no contact period all over again. What to do? |
t3_2chp8j | relationships | Me [19F] having a cultural clash in University dating | I found this guy [23M] that I really liked in Uni... we've been seeing each other around 6 months but haven't called each other a couple yet.
He says that if we dated and ended up marrying each other he would feel badly about me missing out on potential relationships/sexual experiences I could have had in University. He also says he wouldn't want to enter a serious relationship with me with me having only him as a comparison to what relationship/sex is supposed to be like (he was my first).
I understand where he's coming from, and part of me wonders if I've completely naive for thinking that I'm the lucky person that found someone compatible. But the other part of me honestly doesn't care if I only ever dated/had sex with one person. I've found someone I really connect with and like, why should I go looking for a greener pasture?
My family is pretty conservative (read Asians) and I can't exactly ask anyone in my family, but they've only had sex with one person and dated three (and below) people before finding that compatibility. But I've pretty much broken the rules by having pre marital sex. And I'm happy with that, and I honestly don't feel that I need any more partners. I guess I could put it to naive-ness again, but all the people in my family I've known have pretty good marriages even though they've only ever had sex with one person.
How should I explain this view to my Western potential boyfriend? | Do you really need to have many sexual partners/date many people before committing to one person? |
t3_1es52k | relationships | I love my boyfriend but I like another guy too | I've (F/19) been with my boyfriend (M/19) for over 2 years now and we've had an awesome relationship. We're at the same school so we see each other often, but we don't get to spend a lot of time together outside of school because he play for the schools baseball team.
Anyway, recently I ran into this guy who also goes to our school and instantly I had a crush on him.
I know we have a lot of things in common (music, sports, nature of our work, etc.), I've found this out through friends and my boyfriend, who is friendly with him. I've talked to this guy a few times and whenever I see him or we make eye contact, I feel like I'm melting (I sound like a little girl).
I obviously haven't told my boyfriend about my crush, because he can get jealous and there's no reason for him to be worried - I'm not going to act on my feelings.
Getting to the point - What should I do? I'm completely in love with my boyfriend (and I think the other guy might have a girlfriend), but I have an almost overwhelming crush on this guy.
How do I get rid of it? | I love my boyfriend but have a huge crush on another guy. |
t3_4bus7k | relationships | Roommate [23F] gets passive aggressive whenever I [23F] talk to her BF | I found my roommate on Craigslist a year ago. She seemed nice and normal at first, and we had no problems. The only person she hangs out with is her BF [24M], 7 days a week. Sometimes she'd bring him over to our apartment, and I had no issues with this. I noticed she was possessive of him from the beginning, but I thought little of it.
A few months ago, my BF and I broke up. My roommate tried to comfort me a little, and in the process, I mentioned that her BF is very nice to her. I meant it as a genuine compliment, though to be honest, her BF is nice to the point where he's almost a pushover.
Ever since then, whenever my roommate brings her boyfriend over and catches me talking with him alone, a visible frown shows on her face. This has happened increasingly often. She gets grumpy when he asks me about my day, and glares at me whenever she and her BF are occupying the living room and I happen to be in the kitchen nearby.
Now, I am NOT a flirty person by nature (plus I have a crush on a coworker, not my roommate's BF), and I have zero interest in stealing anyone's BF. I don't actively try to talk to her BF alone either. But if we both happen to be in the kitchen or another common space, I have to make polite small talk, right?
**MAIN INCIDENT:** Last night, her BF was in our apartment before she came home from work. They do this often. He was waiting in her room, and I was doing my own thing in the living room. When she texts him that she's about to get home, he comes out to the living room to await her, and has a few chats with me while waiting. Roommate overhears us talking and enters the apartment with a moody expression. I say hi to her, and she completely ignores me.
Now, because of her passive aggressive behavior, I'm worried whenever I even say hello to her BF. I don't know the best way to approach this. | Roommate brings her boyfriend over to OUR apartment, but gets mad whenever I talk to him. Outright ignored me when I said hello the last time this happened. What is the best approach to this? |
t3_46bfaw | tifu | TIFU By playing football | For once this actually happened today, a mere few hours ago in fact.
So every Wednesday we play football (soccer for my American friends over the pond) with our company to let off some steam of the working week. However this week didn't go exactly to plan.
So we are having our warm up before we play just knocking the ball around. However it quickly got competitive which turned out to be a major downfall. So me and one of the other guys were going for the same loose ball. Bare in mind he is a rugby player and is quite large compared to my slender self.
So as we go for the ball I literally bounce backwards off of him. As I fall backwards I slip on a wet patch on the floor and fall backwards. The natural reaction followed of bracing the fall with my hands. However my thumb was slightly sticking out so as I fell my entire weight went onto the thumb. I think you can guess where this is going...
As I land I feel a popping in my thumb. So I look down at it and the skin has peeled open revealing the bone and cartilage that had broken during the fall. So we run into the first aider at the site and he strongly suggests we go to hospital to get it checked out.
Here are a few images of the thumb for those who wish to see:
Image 1:
Image 2: | Played football to relieve stress, ended up with bones sticking out of my thumb |
t3_4k20bc | relationships | Me [20F] with my ___ [56/F] my mum often makes racist & sexist comments - how do I make her stop? | hi reddit!
Back story: My mum and her family is originally from the North of England (we now live in the South) and her parents often make racist comments by accident (generation thing?) and make comments about areas of the North being different to when they lived there due to a large Muslim population. My mum also reads the newspaper and watches the news every day.
My mum has always been a feminist and feels like women should have equal rights etc (which is obviously a good thing) but recently she has been making sexist comments about men;eg. 'this was built badly because a man designed it and so there wasn't much thought into it', I've tried to explain to her she cant say that because its sexist towards men and I doubt she'd like that if someone said that to my brother but she doesn't seem to care. She often says these comments when my dad is there but he doesn't react to them.
Another issue is she has often made racist comments regarding Muslims. She is very against the wearing of the veil for Muslim women and feels that it should be banned in England. I have tried explaining that you don't always know the whole situation and that some women may prefer wearing it etc. I once mentioned a story someone told me about their very sexist classmate and she immediately asked if he was Muslim. I also once told her about being groped in a club and again she asked if the man was Muslim. I've explained to her she cant view Muslim men as horrible people due to some media stories which have reported on girls being attacked by Muslim men as I said she's stereotyping them and that's wrong. Other members of my family have also said that other religions have extremists but no one views that religion as all being bad. Whenever she tries to make rude comments,my brother and I always argue against her and she says she's feeling attacked and becomes upset. Apart from making these comments,my mum has always been very good to me etc and always willing to help, I just don't know how to get her to realise she cant say this stuff. | my mum makes sexist and racist comments - how can I make her stop? |
t3_38iebz | tifu | TIFU by calling my server a disgusting sloth-like creature | Running late for work this morning, I decided I would hit up a drive thru for tea and a bagel. When I got to the window the server guy has on a hand written name badge that says "Jaba". Who couldn't resist a name like that??
In a totally chipper, happy and joking voice I say, "Jaba - like Jaba the Hut? Very cool."
Sweet baby Jesus, he unleashed on me. Apparently that made me racist (he was black, I am white). I'm a bitch. I'm an asshole. Who the fuck do I think I am? You name it, I got it. Thankfully I already had my tea and could see my bagel was in a bag next to him. Otherwise I'm sure I would have gotten some sort of present in my food. I drove away not only as fast as I could get out of the drive thru, but vowing not to go back there again. | Called my drive thru server Jaba the Hut. Got my ass ripped apart. Gotta learn to keep my stupid nerd comments to myself. |
t3_10389p | relationships | i [22 male] may be ruining my 2+ year relationship with my girlfriend [21 female] because i don't want to have sex. | so i'm a 22 year old male and i guess i've always had this problem, but i've always been more into the chase of getting sex than the actual sex. when she and i first got into a relationship it was long distance.
i had gotten out of a long string of one night stands and shitty relationships so i wanted to take it really slow. my girlfriend respected it and it was great. once we started seeing each other more and more in person we started a sexual relationship and now she's living with me.
there's a reoccurring issue though. she'll get on top of me and try to start something but i'm just not interested in the sex. i never really have been into sex. it doesn't feel as amazing to me as i assume most guys, it's honestly something i could do without. i think the biggest issue though is i never come. i have a higher stamina in comparison to most guy as most people i think, and so when we go for a while and i don't feel like continuing, i'll pretend to come and we'll usually cuddle for a while or something. now days i get constant jokes about how i never want sex and such. i've talked to her telling her i wanted to slow down on the sex and just have a relationship without it for a while and that'll work for like a week before she gets on top of me and i have to say no and she starts crying and blah blah blah.
i can't deal with it, but i love her and i want to continue a relationship with her. i can tell she's feeling less attractive about herself because of it too. do i just keep her sexually satisfied anyway? do i end the relationship because we're not seeing eye to eye about this? does she abstain to keep me happy? what do we do? | she keeps wanting sex and i don't and when i say no she either makes fun of me or cries. |
t3_3l6kl6 | relationships | I [22F] am having resentful feelings toward my clingy [23M] ex. Should I call reconciliation off? | Myself and my ex broke up last year due to mental health issues. We have been keeping in contact but I only recently recovered from the heartbreak endured. We only split up due to his anxiety.
We have recently been hanging out again since he has made recovery, and at first I felt great about it. Couldn't wait to get the train moving again.. but over time I started feeling smothered, he would tell me he loves me and i would wake up in the morning with him wrapped around me, and wouldn't let me leave for work (I work as a dental hygenist, he is a grad student).
He judged me for some things that are unrelated to our relationship and it made me resent him further. The walls that were once up feel as if they are built even higher now. I do love him and I really want to give it a shot but I'm afraid of hurting his feelings by telling him he is clingy.
This isn't because I am afraid of being alone, honestly, because I was and am more than happy to be beside myself. I just think we are a great match and I want to work on it but I don't know how to bring up this issue ! Its been effecting all other parts of my life as I feel anxious in my day to day activities.
Advice on how to move forward? | My ex and I are beginning to reconcile but things are moving too fast for me. He seems to feel as if he has ownership of me and I need him to stop being clingy. It's making me resent him. How do I approach this issue? |
t3_3b0cdz | relationships | Me [25 F] always the FWB/Fuck buddy. How can I be taken seriously? | Hey guys, I'm a normal person. However, for as long as I can remember, I go out on dates with guys, either in school or who I met at work/online, and after 1-2 dates, they decide I'm FWB material and nothing more. Alternatively, they'll try to hook up with me and when I decline it, they run away.
I've been told I dont do anything wrong, but that spending time with me is nothing special. I've also been fed every line in the world, like I'm not interested in a relationship right now, I might be gay (seriously), etc.
I've gone along with it a couple of times, and these same guys wind up leaving me for a different girl, who they immediately get into a serious, committed relationship with (two have led to marriage). Even if me and the guy do have things in common, I am always put in the "she's pretty enough to fuck but not drawn/interested in more" type situation. They don't want to "lead me on" to think they want more from me.
I've dated a wide range of guys and the sentiments seem to be pretty equal. Even guys who are not "as good" (or whatever) by certain girl's standards, take zero interest in me. I've really worked on myself and even guys who I have common interests with are really just seeing me as good for sex but nothing more. I don't ooze "sex appeal" either really, beyond my own body itself, but I don't act in a particularly sexual way.
I'm not saying anyone has to date me, but I just feel like, confused why I'm giving off these vibes? I'm not necessarily looking for a serious relationship, but I just want to not be seen as a piece of meat and to know that if the right guy presented himself, that I could avoid giving off those vibes.
Anyone else in the same position?
Men: Have you done this before? What criteria would make me into this person? | Always the FWB/fuck buddy, never the girlfriend. Different guys, who share connections with me. What gives? |
t3_2pxg4w | relationships | My [17/f] boyfriend [16/m] of three months told me my anxiety is annoying. I am not sure how to respond. | Yesterday, my boyfriend told me my anxiety was annoying. Now,
before r/Relationships gets mad at him about it, I want to clarify that he was as nice as possible about it, and he explained to me that he
was not mad at me, and that he loved me, but that he would like for
me to be less anxious.
My anxiety, however, is not pointless. It is mainly about his mother.
His mother is extremely paranoid and anxious, and she will not allow
him to date. She is also extremely religious, and just to give an
example of how paranoid she is, she will not allow her family to say
"diamond" because it sounds like "demon." So the majority of my
anxiety is based off of the fear that she will find out that he and I
are more than just friends, and rip he and I apart.
To give background on why it would be so bad to lose him, he is my
first boyfriend who is not abusive. He also is extremely attractive,
funny, and he makes me feel loved. This is more rare than I could
explain, so I worry extensively about losing him.
Now back to the important part. Since my boyfriend told me to stop
being so anxious last night, I have been struggling with how to react.
I have no one else to talk to, since he is my best friend and my parents aren't much better than his, and I really value the openness
between he and I, and I am afraid to lose it. However, I do not want to be annoying, so I am considering shutting up all of my anxiety and
worries inside so that he cannot see. I am afraid that doing this will
cause he and I to grow apart, but like I said, I don't want to be
annoying. What do I do? | My boyfriend told me (nicely) that he would like me to stop worrying so much because it annoys him. What should I do? Should I just stop telling him when I worry, or is there another option? |
t3_117l5z | relationship_advice | The Guy I'm Seeing Has A Cold Sore. Any Advice? | A week ago, me[f/19] and this guy[m/18] I really like planned to hang out over the weekend. I've known him since high school, as friends, but about a month ago we started taking interest in each other. Anyways, the day before, he warned me that he had a cold sore and we probably shouldn't kiss.
I've never had a cold sore in my life, so I looked up what would happen. Basically, I read that couldn't have any skin contact with him or else I'd be at a risk of getting a cold sore, myself.
On the day we were hanging out, I tried my hardest not to make any skin contact with him, but at the end of the day we had a little goodbye hug. I enjoyed it, but I have the worst immune system.
It also turned out that he was getting sick, and 4 days later we both caught the stomach flu.
Now here I am waiting for his cold sore to go away. I really want to see him again, but it feels like torture since all I want to do right now is cuddle and kiss him. I feel like if I try to hug him again or hold his hand, I might be at a risk! | Guy I like has cold sore, and I'm getting really anxious waiting for it to go away. |
t3_t6wmp | AskReddit | To the Medics of Reddit | Okay, relatively young person here(17), and a lurker of Reddit for a while up until recently. Post high school I knew what I wanted to do was become an EMT, as helping people in every day situations is one of my passions. However, ever since I was aware of death I've always had one nagging thought in my head. In the medical field, you see people die all the time. Sometimes in horribly gruesome ways. I'm no stranger to it - Reddit has no small amount of the gross examples - yet my mind couldn't fathom the idea of actually witnessing death occur before my very eyes. I always told myself, should the day come where I see someone die... I would loose my innocence. It may seem cheesy, but that's how it feels. On one hand I want to help people and save them, but on the other there is the tad feeling of apprehension when getting into this. | Medics of Reddit, how do you cope with death? What was it like the first time you witnessed death on the job? EMT hopeful here, and I want to follow through. |
t3_2dbpky | relationships | I [20M] have a big crush on [23/F] who certainly knows but doesn't seem to be over ex, how to proceed? | I feel like we're compatible and I've made my intentions clear once before. We great friends and we talk every day online via TeamSpeak and catch up regularly both at university or at each others homes (we're keen on movies & video games).
The first time I asked her out was about 1.5 - 2 months after she broke it off with a guy she had been seeing for a long while. This probably wasn't a brilliant idea but there was an opportunity and I took it.
Her reaction: *"I totally would [go see a movie/have dinner as a date] but I'm still thinking about my ex and I feel like it would be unfair to him and you"*. This is fair enough and probably the best thing I could have hoped for at the time.
That was about a month ago, I'm not really considering asking again any time soon but I'm just seeking advice on how should approach this knowing I want to be in a proper relationship with this person. | 20M crush on 23F, advice on how to proceed after a surprisingly good rejection. |
t3_10fgv9 | relationships | 23[m] was asked back out after 7 months by ex 23[f] | Out of the blue she texts me today asking how I am, how work is going, etc. We dated for three and a half years in college, broke up in February of this year. After college ended in spring of 2011 we lived in different cities. January of 2012 I move to the same city as her, but things are off. She finally says that she doesn't want to be with me anymore, citing the time apart and various arguments throughout the relationship.
Fast forward to last weekend, I see her best friend at a party. Best friend comes up to me and I drunkenly, and regrettably, admit that I still thought about my ex. Friend tells ex, and lo and behold I get texts from ex today asking how I am, etc.
Eventually conversation leads to me being a pussy and saying we should get together sometime. But I did say also that I wanted to talk for awhile before seeing her, to feel it out. She agreed and seemed happy to get the chance of seeing me.
So, what do? Do I continue talking to her? Do I see where this can go? Obviously I don't want to get hurt again, but she was the love of my life and having spent so much time with her.
Other side info: I have been with a few other girls in our time apart and I would have to guess the same for her. In my experience, nothing has compared and I have really only been semi-interested in one other girl. | ex of 3.5 years hits me up after 7 months of clean break. Should I continue talking to her? |
t3_4ghecf | relationships | Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [20 F], I think I'm starting to resent her | I like this girl a lot, she's really nice to me, she's very devoted to me, and I care a lot about her. For the most part, her and I have the same goals in life; we want the same future. In that regard, things are great.
But lately, every time I talk to her, I start questioning why I'm still with her.
The biggest thing is that she's very insecure, and she gets sad at the smallest things. I'm not at all trying to belittle her emotions, but it's really hurtful to have to keep reassuring her that I'm not attracted to other girls (it makes me feel like I'm a bad person or something). And though this might seem a little selfish, it really brings me down, because it seems like every time I talk to her, something small ends up making her sad, and then I have to spend an hour consoling her and making her feel better. It makes me feel like I'm a bad person. I understand that it's part of a relationship to do that, and I do care deeply about her feelings, but it's getting to the point where this happens just about every single time we talk, and it's making me begin to dread speaking to her. I want the person I'm in a relationship with to be my partner in life, but I'm starting to feel like she's my enemy in some way, because every time I say something she disagrees with, she just starts getting sad. I know that's not healthy at all for a relationship.
I do need to point out though that she's not immature about it. She never tries to guilt me, and I don't think she's trying to manipulate me or anything.
I know it seems like I should end things, but I want things to work, because I really care a lot about her and don't want to lose her. But this relationship is starting to make me feel miserable, and I think I'm starting to resent her. What should I do? What could I say? | Girlfriend gets sad very easily, it's starting to make me dread talking to her and resent her. I'm desperate for help. |
t3_3z6qo3 | relationships | My (18f) ex girlfriend (17f) sent me a pic of her and my current boyfriend (17m) and I dont know why am i upset about it. | history: two years ago, i (then 16) felt in love with a girl (then 15) for the first time. Lets call her Ann. Our common friend introduced us about a year before i felt in love with her. We became really good friends, we spent amazing summer together (as friends), then we realised we share same feelings for each other. We never defined any relationship between us, but i would describe what was going on between us as dating. Then on our friends party, we had sex for the first time then Ann broke my heart and made out with some guy the same night. We never really talked since.
now: now i (18 f) have an amazing boyfriend (17 m) and im really happy eith him. He knows Ann -she went to the same elementary school as him- and he also knows about my history with her. But tonight, they both were at their friends party and Ann sent me a photo of her and him- just normal picture of them two in a mirror, both smiling and seems like they are having fun. I dont know why am i so upset about this and i see no reason to be so mad. So why am i mad at them, reddit? | My (18f) ex girlfriend (17f) sent me a pic of her and my current boyfriend (17m) and I dont know why am i upset about it. |
t3_33ixvi | tifu | TIFU by missing the bus twice | So i'm a freshman in high school, long story short it's been an boring and awful year so far. In the morning, my routine bus was a substitute bus, but I didn't really care. Day passes as usual, and our school is so large that the school buses have to be split up in four waves. I check every bus but no bus is actually my bus. Someone who rode my bus checked in with the bus supervisor and said that our bus was one of the very first buses in the first wave.
Fine, i'll just wait for a roundabout bus. So we waited. And we waited... AAAND we waited. 30 minutes passed and nothing. So me and a friend(name shall not be given) decided to walk our asses home. I was hesitant to the idea, but he said that he's done this before. Fair enough, I guess. So we start walking and by the time we get halfway down the school's road, the roundabout bus has left with the kids who rode my bus. Also, IT'S FUCKING RAINING.
Again, karma bit me in the ass harder than an anaconda with a death grip. We have to walk about a mile just to get to a turn where I can take a shortcut that I(thought I)knew. We take that shortcut through high grass and it's nothing but mud and snakeholes. Also, there's a muddy flowing creek that we had no choice but to pass through. My dumbass self chose the wrong day to wear 150$ shoes, no less. We had to jump across a flowing, muddy creek just to pass through more mud and snake holes. Finally, i'm home, but my shoes are muddy and soaked. Exhaustion and fatigue almost caused a young demise. A 40 minute walk for absolutely nothing. | Impatient brat gets his soul fucked up. |
t3_3b7x6a | relationships | Me [25F] with my girl [31/F] help with moving too fast!? | I'm gonna use the Uhaul reference only because Ive never been in this situation.
she has codependency issues and so do I...I want to create more space without her feeling inadequate or rejected which I know she needs a counselor for. she sees one now.
She is a great person...but this week and a half has literally evolved from us being friends and me doing her hair to her spending her nights with me, buying me things (ive been sick), and her just doting on me. us kissing. her holding me. long talks. Total time of us "talking" a lot would be a month for those that are asking.
Im fiercely independent and she knows that. I feel a little rushed. I dont want things to crash and burn because we moved too fast. She even wants her kitten to meet my cats to see if they can get along O.o
I was actively involved in a poly/bdsm community prior and now I feel as if Im letting some of it go and idk if Im ready. I feel like it's time. though.
any advice please? | She's moving fast. I just recently found my place in bdsm and I feel like I have to let it go. I feel like rushing only leads to crashing and burning. Things feel good, but I'm independent and I know there is a chance of codependency. Help! |
t3_14mnxp | dating_advice | How do I make a move on the girl I'm tutoring? | We're both seniors in high school. She's in regular physics and I just finished up physics at the local private university through an advanced placement program in my high school.
We are currently in the hallways after school, a good place to start would probably be moving the meetings to a more private place like a house or MAYBE the library or something. I can probably manage finding an excuse for that but suggestions are more than welcomed. What I'm more u sure about is how do I go from "potential energy is the product of hight, gravity, and mass" to more? | how do you go from physics to chemistry? |
t3_14ijel | relationship_advice | My "one that got away" just came back into the picture after 4 years. Should I pursue or keep trying to move on? | Ok so here's the deal. My "one that got away" was with me for a year and a half before I enlisted into the military. I was 19 and she was 17 so neither of us really had the maturity to handle the situation any differently then we did. Once I returned from boot camp the relationship ended pretty quickly. I tried to be as mature as possible and respect her decision, but that was probably the worst day of my life. We promised to remain friends, but of course that didn't last more than a few months. So we fell out of contact and didn't really speak for the last 4 years. I tried everything to get over her...different girls, deployments over seas, even a failed marriage (currently separated from my spouse but have a beautiful daughter from it). Well about 2 months ago we just started talking (background investigator for new gov job interviewed her) when she messaged me letting me know. Since then the messages have become more and more flirtatious and more reminiscent of older days. Here's the catch, she's currently engaged. When I talk to her about it it's obvious that she doubts what she's doing and still has feelings for me. She says she's not sure what is going on with her right now and she doesn't want to string me along but she does still feel something for me. I want to respect her space and give her what she wants, but I don't want to sabotage myself and anything that could be by leaving her alone. So Reddit, am I being a hopeless romantic or am I just too far out of touch with reality? | The one that got away still has feelings for me. What do I do? |
t3_1az0cp | relationships | [23M] - Trying to figure out if there is more meaning behind this than what's on the surface | So I've been seeing this girl [23F] for about 5 months. First, I realize I'm probably just a rebound because she was only single for about two weeks before we started hooking up, but she really likes me and I her, so we'll see. We are getting to the point where we are hanging out more and more often, and have kind of brushed on the topic of making things exclusive. As we were talking about this last night, she brought something up that I'm not sure how I should feel:
She says while there is no one else in her life, there is someone really important to her, someone she views as a best friend. Problem is (for me anyway), this is an ex-boyfriend from a few years ago, but they can just really get along and talk about anything and everything. They also hook up every now and then, most recently being about a month ago (not faulting her as we never even discussed being a couple at that point). She says she still wants him to be a part of her life, but wants to date me. Should I be worried about this? I know that he still has feelings for her, and even though he says he just wants her to be happy, I feel like if he's still in the picture it might end up complicating things at some point down the line. I'm not sure if she still has feelings for him, I should ask, but I'm scared she will say yes. | Want to start a relationship with a girl, she's still "best friends" with an ex |
t3_1rxjjj | relationships | Me [24/F] with my crush [23/M] whose never had a girlfriend | For 6 months I had a crush on a man that I met on a dating website. We met once and he was really awesome. When I told him I liked him, he ignored me. I moved on and got into an abusive relationship for 5 months (it's now ended) where during that time I developed feelings for my old crush's best friend. His best friend has never had a girlfriend and has been rejected by every girl he's ever approached. How do I go about hinting at him without sounding phony? I don't want to sound fake. I really truly have feelings for him. He is 23 and I am 24. I'm literally terrified of rejection. Also, would it be awkward since I used to have a 6mo crush on his best friend? | I have a crush on my old crush's best friend who has never had a girlfriend and I am not sure how to go about this. Advice? |
t3_40qaai | tifu | TIFU by Jacking off on cam to a catfish. | Well, I think I am fucked. I met this girl online, thinking it was a "real girl" But Apparently those don't exist on the internet. I uhm well, lets just say I was horny af shes like I don't have a webcam or a mic but I am getting a mic soon. Blah Blah Blah. Right? So I am like fuck it, I jack off on camera today only to find out she's a catfish. I am not for sure but I am like 90% sure. Her IP traces to UK, she says she lives in UK. But she sent me a pic of her (way before I jacked it boys) and I backtraced it. Found a twitter, same profile picture as the pic she sent me. I already had her added on Facebook, she was in a relationship. Its also from like 2014, so I am like. I guess this is legit...... After I jack off on the camera she sends me a few YouTube videos and stuff of hers. I realize that they are literally reuploads of shitty videos from Miss Headshot or some stupid call of duty YouTuber. I am like okay, at this time she is offline so I am gonna do more snooping. I snoop around, find the twitter is linked to a YouTube channel. I look at the channel only to realize that the girl is the same girl I have added on Facebook, but the thing is that she is American.......... I think I am fucked, black mail maybe?? What do I do :/ | I jacked off on cam and I believe I found out the girl was a catfish. |
t3_371xvk | relationship_advice | I [44] fell for him [43], I shouldn't have. | We met online. 2 1/2 years ago. I fell in love with him. He's always dated other women and I tried to date and find someone else. He found someone else. He found her over a year ago.
He wants children. I have three 23, 17, 14. He has none. Right now I would have his kid, but I physically can no longer have children.
I fell in love with him. I think he has feelings for me, but he's not IN love with me. We have an amazing sex life. He wasn't honest in the beginning about dating other women. When I figured it out (one month after we met he took another woman to Las Vegas, brought me back an ashtray), I tired to brake it off. He shows up at my house unannounced. He'll text me relentlessly until I respond.
In the past six months I learned a lot about his life. His past doesn't change my feelings for him. It just scares me and I just want to exit as gracefully as possible.
His family has ties with the mob. His father was murdered when he was young. He served five years for dealing.
I feel like I've become the comare. We don't date anymore. We fuck. It's extremely good. Then he buys me breakfast in the morning and leaves.
Essentially and realistically I know what's going on. We had more. But, when I think about it we really didn't. I'm just a piece of ass.
I'm sitting here in tears. What the hell have I done. I re-read what I write and just cry. I'm an idiot.
I've been divorced for 10 years and cannot find love. I know I need to say good bye. Maybe if I let it go, things will start to go right. Then I think about being without him. | Been dating the wrong guy for too long. I need to let it go and I don't know how because I love him. Can Reddit help me find a real man? Or a way to end it without Prozac and Xanax? |
t3_ry95n | AskReddit | On average, how many human beings have died or been injured in the process of facilitating my life and my comfort? | I have been mulling over the way in which we, in developed nations, live in societies that avoid death or injury, spending little but making big money and engaging in excessive consumption.
We consume and waste a lot, predominantly for our own comfort than survival. Today I consumed food with ingredients that originated from 9 different countries, six of these were located in South America and Africa. I am wearing a dress that cost me £8.00 and I used soap that included ingredients that would most likely have come from deforestation. My mobile phone and my computer contain elements mined from Africa, but people who I am pretty sure don't actually earn a wage. I imagine that not only am I screwing around with nature, animals and the environment, but also human life too.
So I was wondering if anyone had any information available regarding the average amount of human life lost to fuel consumption. I am talking about farmers, factory workers, miners, anything and anyone that inputs into sustaining my safe, comfortable, excessive lifestyle at an extremely low price? Does anyone out there have any idea what impact we are individually making at various levels to the environment? Would love to hear how other people feel about this and what they do to change how their comfort is hurting others. | I am really comfortable and cheap. Who is getting screwed over by my selfish actions? |
t3_4jgnf0 | relationship_advice | 18F looked through my Facebook and broke up with 19M me | It's been a rough relationship where she's made a couple of mistakes before. I gave her a chance and we got back together. Recently we fought and she asked for my Facebook password, which I gave to her, and found out during our break I was seeing this other girl. She was also seeing another guy but I didn't specifically tell her that I was with someone. Now she blocked me on everything but one media outlet. I just want to know what I can do to try to salvage this. I love her a lot and I'm willing to do almost anything. But apologizing doesn't seem to be enough. I wish she could've given me the chance that I gave her... | I'm trying to get my girlfriend to forgive me for not telling her the extent of my relationship with another girl during our break. |
t3_1a80pn | relationships | I (m20) dating a girl (f17) and I need advice! | So I've been dating this girl for a few months now, we had a thing a few years ago but decided it wasn't the right time. We've been dating again for 3 months, she has been my best friend for years and I don't know what to do. I got out of a relationship because my ex cheated on me with my friend and it's left me with trust issues I guess. Now don't get me wrong I trust her, it's just some of the guys she's friends with. So her prom is in a few months and she's bringing this guy who raises a few flags with me. He tried breaking me and my last girlfriend up and there is no question, he will be her prom date. And to be honest I'm okay with it, but she wants me to go aswell. I just don't think I can handle sitting there watching his have his arm around my girlfriend knowing that he is inlove with her. She's mad because I don't want to go and watch that and at this point I really don't know what to do. I don't want to lose her but when we talked about it last night, she was really mad. We're having a talk in a few hours when she is off, but I don't know what to say! Help! | Girlfriend has a friend who raises flags with me and she's taking him to prom and I have to sit and watch it |
t3_iapwv | AskReddit | Do you ever have one of those dreams... | Where you and your best friend who now lives in a different state are hired by a shady corporation to look into something but they don't exactly tell you what but you're pretty sure it involves magic and when you show up in a 1963 Opel Kadett for some reason named Oliver of course at sunset because everyone know investigations go better at night and so you walk to the beach where some really sketchy magic shit is going down with a Lost-esque smoke monster so you both decide to hightail it back to the car but on the way you scare the shit out of some random guy walking his dog because you're two dudes running at a full out sprint right at him with flashlights illuminating the path in front of you with every arm pump and then it's suddenly light out again and you're walking into your favorite pub past a fat man with a bushy beard who you hardly take notice of and start ordering a couple pints and bullshitting about how fucking crazy the previous night was when all of a sudden the lady from the shady corporation show up and hands you a small stack of $100 bills because at least you tried even if you couldn't finish the job which is quite fortunate since you weren't sure if you were going to make this month's rent when all of a sudden that same guy with the outrageous beard from earlier walks up and snatches one of the $100 bills from you and at first you're like 'okay...' but then you decide wait a minute that's not okay and so you take it back from him which he's not all too happy about and so you finish your beers and decide to get the fuck out of there before any more crazy shit happens but as soon as you walk out the door the beard man splashes lighter fluid on you and sets your pants on fire since he's still livid about earlier but you react fast enough that some well coordinated flailing around puts it out and then you get a text which wakes you up into a dazed WTF state? | fuck punctuation. |
t3_1967uf | relationship_advice | (17/m) getting back into the whole dating thing | Welp, it begins with me breaking up with my ex almost 10 months ago. All was good until i met this new girl and hit it off. This was probably about 3 months ago now. We were great for eachother. Cutting the story short, she played me and fuck her. Now my issue. There's this girl who's one of my friends since kindergarten and we're close. I don't want shit to get weird between us, but i really care about her, and she feels the same way (or so she's showing it). The mixed signals i'm getting are confusing the shit outta me. So reddit, wat i do. | broke up with ex, got played, got close with great friend since kindergarten and have mutual feelings as it seems but don't wanna screw things up |
t3_1r18dk | pettyrevenge | Rude manager's bathroom adventure | I work for a very large company as an IT Field agent and was tasked with installing a new system for my company which had an office inside of an EXTREMELY large Tech company that makes (hint) Processors. The security for the building is very tight and while inside you must be escorted by the Associate who has clearance to walk about the building. Since I was a guest I was required to have an escort with me at all times, the penalty if I were left alone would mean the permanent banning from re-entering the facility again.
My chaparone for the day was a nice guy whom I get along with great and had clearance. He was also escorting his manager which did not have clearance. This manager and I have never been buddies and he has on multiple occasions tried to humiliate me and talk down to me. So when I found out that both my escort and him could never be separated, I hatched my plan.
I quickly requested to go to the coffee lounge and upon arrival immediately began drinking as much coffee as I can in a short amount of time. My plan began to peek its head shortly after as my stomach made quick work of that dark fluid. While inside the small cubicle with the two of them, I gave them a preview with a small hiroshima erupting from my ass. I played ashamed and told them both I was sorry but I really needed to go to the restroom. The manager professed his disaproval stating that he was very busy and could not step away. I pleaded with them and eventually the three of us went to the restroom together. Once I was in a stall and was certain the manager could hear, I unleashed the hounds of hell. I proceeded to serenaded him with the loudest, wettest sharts I could muster. I keep it going for a good ten minutes while they had to wait on me. I felt bad for my friend who was innocent in all this, but I could not miss this chance to let this manager catch some of my shit for once. | Made an obnoxious manager listen to and smell my shit. |
t3_4jzphi | relationships | My [17M] friends keep coming into my work and annoying me. How can I deal with them | Hi Reddit I am hoping you can help me. I am literally at my wits end, I almost lost my temper today at my moms Cafe I work at in front of customers.
I live in a small town in America, only 12 thousand people live here and I love that. My mom owns a Cafe here and I work in there everyday after school. Business is really good and mom is doing really well financially and I am happy for her. I am a junior in high school.
I am actually still at the Cafe I just finished locking/cleaning up and I am about to start heading to my friends place. But today mom left me to run the Cafe for a while. She had to go the Middle School for a urgent parent teacher interview with my sister. My sister has been acting up in class alot apparently.
She can leave me in charge because I can make the entire menu in my sleep. It's become like second nature now
So I started working at 3:30 pm and at about 4 my friend Savannah came in. She is not the problem she always come in for a Rocky Road Mocha. I spoke to her for a little bit and I am going over to her house any minute to hang out.
My guy friends came in at around 5 and were just driving me insane. There is this section of the shop where we have bags of coffee beans. You can buy a bag for $20, they were messing up the display and disorganising everything. They interrupted another customer when he was ordering from me. They sat down at a table and they kept yelling over at me to " have fun". They ordered Milkshakes and blueberry muffins and they had no money to pay. So I am taking it out of my pay I am getting
I almost lost it at them, everything in my body was wanting to yell at them and tell them to get the f*** out. I controlled myself the Cafe was packed. What can I do the next time this happens?
Thanks for all your response and taking the time to read. I am heading to my friends Savannah house now, so I may not reply right away. I will when I get to her place | My friends came into my work and were pestering me and annoying other customers. How can I handle this situation next time |
t3_2hpfp2 | self | A "friend" owes me a decent amount of money and has it and won't pay it back or contact me at all. Any suggestions? | Backstory - I lent a friend $400 when he couldn't afford his rent back in June. He told me he would pay me back the following week. He fell into some rough times still after and pushed it back to July which was fine by me. Slowly he kept pushing the days back and trying to come up with new ways to pay me back until eventually he stopped responding to me. I lost my job over a month ago and have been struggling with cash and to top it off my grandmother is stage 4 Parkinson's and I need to purchase a plane ticket out to see her ASAP... so obviously the $400 would cover that easily. I attempted to explain this all to him and he still refuses to answer messages. On top of it all he posts about his new (more expensive) apartment he just moved into on facebook, constantly, and shows off all the cool crap he's buying or doing. Wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation and if so what did they do or say to get the money they were owed. | Lent friend $400. I lost job and grandmother is very ill, he has money again and wont pay me back. What to do? |
t3_1tr7zj | loseit | Possibly the best thing I got for xmas! | Don't know if this should go here, but no one I know IRL will care about this.
I just got a call from one of the local gyms here. Their membership is far outside what I can afford, and I've spoken with their manager a few times about possible assistance paying for it. She called me today to say that thanks to an anonymous donation, they're funding around 100 people's fees for a year, all I have to pay is a 20$ activation for the swipe card. I almost cried on her. I was a member there for most of November, and simply couldn't afford to pay after a Groupon for a month ran out.
They have 2 full size pools (indoor heated and outdoor not), a freeweight room, weight machine room, and cardio room, as well as tons of classes and personal trainers, all included in the membership. All of the people were *super* nice, which was great because at my size, gyms are intimidating as all hell. I've actually been to the other two gyms here in town and they're full of the types of people I'd like to avoid in general. (Super buff guys taking over the weight area and glaring at anyone that dares to set foot nearby, or beach bunnies with the perfect makeup and outfits that consider the bikes / treadmills / elliptical their personal machines and bitch loudly if anyone dares to use them)
As a person that avoided gyms and pretty much most physical activity for the majority of my adult life, I'm absolutely over the moon that I got this membership. I know the journey can be made without a gym membership and all that, but the month I was going there, I felt better than I have in *years*. I'm looking SO forward to going tomorrow and starting back up with that! | I'm just crazy happy that I got a free gym membership and needed somewhere to squeee over it! |
t3_oyqb3 | AskReddit | Did I just agree to a date? I'm honestly not sure... | Here's the whole story
I got in a wreck, It was the other drivers fault. The other insurance company accepts liability. Their insurance calls to finish up on the claim. Talking to the claims rep of the other party and she says she'd like to meet in person to discuss the claim further, doesn't ask if I'll have the car on me, just says we'll get lunch on Friday. I don't know of any car insurance company that does this... and everyone I've talked to says this doesn't ever happen...
we're on for lunch tomorrow and I don't know what I should expect. | Meeting with insurance claims woman in person after the whole claim has been settled. Does this happen? Or is this something else? |
t3_1pltey | relationships | Me [25F] with two partners [25M/29M] of over a year, longing for solitude, don't know if I actually want to break up | First of all, thanks to anyone who reads this. I'm normally more of a commenter, but this time I'd really like some advice.
This year has been tough for me. I quit my good job in a horrible company and exchanged it for an awful job in a great company as it was the only thing I could find. This came with the realisation that my qualifications aren't worth jack and so I've committed myself to learning new skills that will help my job prospects in the future. My self-confidence took a real knock.
I love studying. However, over the past months I feel like it's been getting harder and harder to keep all balls in the air. My work-life balance is out of whack. I spend most of my time studying or trying to motivate myself to study. This is compacted by the fact I work weekends, so on my free days my friends are at work. I've been depressed for several months, but it seems to have improved recently.
Now to my partners: I see each one once or twice a week (average of 3 nights total per week). They are each lovely in their separate ways and are a huge part of my life. They support me in so many ways. My life would certainly be darker without them.
However, I've recently been finding myself fantasising about being single. I think about how much time I'd have. How few responsibilities I'd have. How much less scheduling I'd have to do. How much more time I would have to put into my friendships (I moved towns 6 months ago and my friendships are not strong).
Reddit, I have no idea whether I should listen to these feelings and just go it alone for a while. I'm putting myself under so much pressure and am almost constantly stressed. I'm quick to lash out and any arguments affect me much more than they usually would. I believe once I manage to switch jobs, things will finally normalise again, but I can't be sure and also don't know when this will be.
I would really like to hear your opinions, as I'm really not sure I'm thinking straight. | Spend all my time studying so I won't have to work a job I hate forever; exhausted, stressed and wondering whether being single might alleviate some of the pressure, although my partners are fantastic. |
t3_3ypctc | relationships | Redditors, how do you feel about your S/O saving photos of people you know and fapping to them? | 22 yo F, 20 yo M. Dating for 3 years.
My real question is....
Is it weird? Especially if they're nudes? I tried r/askreddit, and someone said I should try here. I... Don't really know how I feel about it. I obviously trust my S/O, and don't think anything would come of it. But is it CREEPY?
It was really my fault to begin with.
I forgot to log out of his account, and saved a trippy picture from 420chan to what I thought were my files.
Then bam.
A whole album full of this one chick he knows, and that I'm acquainted with. (she's actually famous on r/gonewild) so I'm sure A LOT of guys have her saved to their files, not just him. But I don't really know how to feel about all of it. After all, a naked body is just a naked body, no matter what. But the fact that he knows her personally and I KNOW he faps to them just... kinda weirds me out I guess. | Stumbled across nudes of a chick S/O knows. Advice? |
t3_2om7fb | Advice | Having second thoughts about what I really want to do with my future. Pls send help. | I'm 18 now, and on the verge of starting college. For the longest time, I had big plans of going to college after high school and majoring in Computer Information Science (CIS) and minoring in Business Administration (BA), graduating, and getting a good, well paying career in a related field so that I can be able to provide for a family in the future. Sounds pretty good right? Well the beginning of the year, I applied to my college of choice and got accepted a couple months later for the Spring semester of 2015. I'm on track to start in January.
So far so good.
Well the past couple months I've become unsure of if this is really what I want to do and pursue a job in the IT field. Thing is though, these are the plans that I've told everybody (friends and family) for the longest time. My parents have always had some financial trouble throughout the years and have always said that all they want is for their kids to do better than they did. So they were ecstatic when I chose to study CIS and BA. They're all so proud of me for getting accepted to this school (A pretty notable school in the area. And they only have a 9% acceptance rate) and of the degree I planned on pursuing. I'm just worried about what the entirety of my friends and family would think if I just out of the blue decide that college isn't for me and to pursue other plans for my future.
Which leads to the alternative.
I like to work with my hands...like building things and working on cars. I have little knowledge of either, but it's something that I enjoy doing and would love to learn more about. Now...my SO that I met at my high school graduation (I was homeschooled so neither of us had ever met before, but that's a story for another day) who recently moved to Arizona...her whole family is made up of mechanics and carpenters. My thoughts are that I could move out to Arizona to be with her and apprentice under her family and learn more about working on cars and the like. | I had a solid plan of going to school and pursuing a good degree, now I'm unsure that college is right for me and am contemplating moving out of state to be with my SO and learn auto maintenance from her family. |
t3_18ca2e | relationship_advice | {27/m] I don't want to have sex with my girlfriend [28/f] anymore, but I love her. | I have been dating my girlfriend for two and a half years, but have only been sexually active for the past year and a half. Up to about six months ago, the sex was fine. She would usually have multiple orgasms, and I was satisfied for the most part. And the emotional connection during our sex was perfect.
Recently though she has gained some weight. To be clear, I am not extremely picky about weight on girls. When we got together my girlfriend was already 90-100 pounds overweight, but it didn't bother me too much. Plus she told me that she was starting a diet and hoped to drop most of the excess fat. Unfortunately she never did lose that weight and is now probably 120 pounds overweight.
This is enough to cross a line with me. I don't find her as attractive anymore. I have tried hinting that I would love some company when I work out in the mornings (our apartment complex comes with gym access), but she's made it very clear that she has no desire to do that. In fact if I bring up dieting or exercise at all it ends badly for me.
And it's getting worse. When we have sex I now have to physically pull her back and forth across my erection to make her orgasm because she doesn't have the ability to keep going by herself. (She usually only gets there while she's on top.) Sometimes she'll just give up completely in the middle of sex and let me do all the work. And if I stop she gets offended and wants to know why I'm not enjoying the sex.
I know I should talk to her about this, but the one time I brought this up (gently of course), she ended up in tears because she felt so bad about herself. She then decided (without me, mind you) that I was so attracted to her "curves" that I don't mind that weight. Her reaction makes me hesitant to bring this up again.
I love this girl. We have even seriously talked about marriage (something I still hope for). But I don't want to have sex with her anymore. And I don't know how to tell her. What should I do? | I'm not attracted to my girlfriend anymore, but still love her. Advice? |
t3_m6prs | AskReddit | What's the worst lie you told a child to shut them up? | Here's mine: My med school has an outreach program that teaches healthy eating and exercise to fifth graders at a local inner city elementary school. This year we (5 of us adults) have a group of 13 hyperactive, loud, angry, disobedient, attention-craving girls. They really don't want to be there and think it's "dumb."
Since one of the 5 adults was absent today (didn't feel like going) and I was tired of their constant yelling, I broke down and lied. I told them he wasn't there because he was in the hospital. Surprisingly, they actually cared, so we spent 45 minutes making him "get well soon cards" with healthy eating themes. There was no yelling for those 45 minutes, just peace and motha fuckin' quiet. | I lied to a group of children about a teacher being in the hospital so they would shut up and spend 45 minutes making "get well soon" cards |
t3_20ivyr | askwomenadvice | Where can I find in depth female perspective and advice for my current relationship situation? 29m 28f 5y marriage | I am currently in an extremely complicated situation with my wife. Our relationship is very close to over. Part of me feels at fault but part of me feels like I'm the best freaking husband/dad in the world! What is wrong with her?... There is NO doubt the we/I need counseling to solve this problem.
Never the less; I need in depth female perspective to help me pull this relationship out of the ditch. Preferably from an extremely patient female who could be committed to understanding the situation and would be willing to have extended communication helping me to become the husband that my wife needs. I am committed to our relationship but I can't get thru to her...
Thanks in advance!
Here are a few key words about my relationship/situation that may help your advice: christian, m 29yo, f 28yo, 3yo boy, only children, wife had bum dad, she cheated w my friend, she can't fell my love, married 5 years.... Much much more .... | seeking in depth female advice to help save my marriage |
t3_168dey | relationships | My boyfriend [17] and I [17f] are looking for ways to spice it up, but not in the bedroom... | My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 8 months. We love each other dearly, but making out with him is getting really repetitive. Same places(bedrooms,bonus rooms, cars, etc), same positions, same moves, *everything*! We've tried things like passing the ice in between our mouths, kissing other parts of our bodies, making out in nothing but underwear, etc. It's just repetitive and it's getting kind of boring.
Don't get me wrong, other parts of our relationship are great! It's just making out that seems to be our low point. The other sexual things are great, but we kind of miss those nights when all we did was make out and it was exciting and enough. How do we get that feeling back again?
**Anyone have any advice for us? Ways to switch it up? Anything?!**
He knows I'm posting this so he'll be checking in on it! | Making out with my bf is repetitive. How do we spice it up? |
t3_dxrbi | Pets | Reddit, my cat suddenly started acting strange.. i need your help! | My 10 month old cat started acting strange recently. He is a rescue so he is normally skittish around people he does not know. With me though, he is an attention whore. When i come home at the end of the day and he hears my voice, he runs from wherever he is in the house to come greet me.
The last few days he has been acting weird. He hides underneath my covers on my bed and won't come out. When i uncover him he freaks out and buries his face in the blankets trying to sneak back under. When i come home he comes out to see me but hides underneath the dining room table. When i go over to pet him he runs away. He never ever runs away from me.
Then, last night i put him in his cat tower, where he goes when he is scared, and he sat there for about 15 seconds and freaked out. His eyes starting darting around the room like he was following something, he jumped off the top of the tower, jumped up onto my bed and dove underneath the covers. This is really unusual for him and i think something is wrong. I've heard that cats act this way sometimes when they are sick? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. | My cat is acting strange, hiding under covers (too terrified to come out), under chairs, in the basement and running away from me when he is normally affectionate and social. |
t3_1uocza | AskReddit | So I was pulled over after drinking but let go even though I admitted to drink, does this mean I will not get a dui? | I was pulled over, the officer asked if I was drinking and I said yes (Im pretty sure they followed me from the bar). They had me get out of the car and asked if they could search it. I agreed and the one officer searched while the other officer cuffed me and held me against the car while it happened. After the search, he found nothing and said he was going to park my car in the near by parking lot and told me to go home. They gave me the key and said to get home and they would make sure to check on the car and make sure it was there in the morning. I am just wondering if anyone has been in this type of situation before or if I was extremely luck, or even maybe I might be getting a dui in the mail in the near future. From pennsylvania for info. | drank, pulled over, car searched, cuffed, cop parked car, let go without arrest. |
t3_1n83fk | loseit | A question about macros. | So I've been lurking on /r/loseit, /r/leangains, and even /r/gainit for a while. My current goal is to get down to about 10% body fat and then begin to slow bulk. Currently I'm about 180 lbs and though I'm not sure what my current body fat percentage is my weight loss goal is to get down to 160. If I had to guess I'd say my body fat percentage is somewhere between 14-20%.
Sorry for the preface, I'll get right to the point. From what I understand, to maintain as much muscle as possible while on a cut it's important to eat 1g of protein per pound of your goal body weight minimum. This helps to reduce muscle loss while cutting. A simple formula I found that I really like is to eat < 10 * current body weight a day to lose weight. Obviously this is simplifying what can be a complicated formula based on your activity level and other factors, but when double checked against the calculator in the FAQ this number hits a middle ground between the weight loss number and the more rapid weight loss number so I'm going to give it a try.
Using this simple formula, 10 * 180lbs = 1800 cals a day. To maintain as much muscle as possible I'm going to be eating at least 160g of protein a day maybe 170g just for satiety and because meat is delicious. SO, if a single gram of protein has 4 calories that means out of my 1800 cals/day 640-680 of them are coming from protein. My question is does it make a huge difference where the other calories come from?
I realize that getting those calories from nutrient rich foods like vegetables is ideal, but hypothetically speaking, once I hit my protein requirements for the day would I still lose weight if the remainder of my calories came from nothing but ice cream? (As long as I stayed under 1800.) Please don't take this example too seriously, it's an intentionally extreme scenario. I'm just wondering if a certain split between carbs and fat is more ideal for weight loss. | 1g of protein per pound of body weight, **check.** So ideally where should the rest of my calories come from? Does it matter? |
t3_21pa39 | running | Experiences with treadmill butt? | Hey! I'm semi new to running and just heard about [treadmill butt]
Has anyone experienced this? I live in a major city and my area isn't the best for running outside- Lots of disappearing sidewalks, major hills, and shady corners. I wanted to start running on the treadmill at the gym till I get good enough where I feel comfortable running in this area but I'm pretty much super turned off from the idea of getting a flat butt. I very much like my butt how it is, I'm actually trying to make it more "bubbly" so I don't want to completely jeopardize that. Any suggestions? | I want to run on the treadmill and get a fantastic ass. Possible? |
t3_2ki6mu | relationships | Me [25 M] with my Girlfriend [21 F] 4 months, Got mad at me for not wanting to cuddle her while she is sick. | So here's the story, my girlfriend recently got sick, with what? We don't know. She said "All I want is to cuddle and for you to hold me" And I told her the honest truth "I don't cuddle or kiss sick people, I'll make you OJ, soup, and send you to bed"
Her reaction was "If you were sick I'd cuddle you, I'd put you before myself, but I obviously know where I stand. I'll talk to you later bye"
Am I missing something? Do I not love her because I don't want to get sick and miss work? How would I deal with something like this? | Girlfriends sick, I don't want to cuddle, I'm the bad guy. |
t3_2g2why | relationships | I'm (22 m) meeting a girl (19 f) for the first time today, I have concerns about her friend. | So I've been speaking to this girl for the past month and I'm smitten. We're meeting up for the first time today and she's bringing a friend with her - I should add that I'm completely fine with this. The only issue is she's told me some things about her friend that are making me more nervous than excited. Firstly she told me that every guy she ever liked has ended up liking her friend more. I assured her that this won't be the case with me, I've seen her friend and she's nothing special and personality-wise is not the kind of person I go for. my main concern is how to act if her friend tries to be flirty with me- as my date more than likely won't confront her, and how to balance my attention. Obviously I'll be wanting to focus my attention on my date, but I don't particularly want to leave her friend out in the cold. | meeting a great girl, concerned with what I've heard about her friend |
t3_rlwvq | relationships | My boyfriend is really jealous about me watching lesbian porn. What should we do? | I am twenty and he's twenty-two. We've been together for over a year. We dated for a while a few years ago and were friends in the in between time.
Up until recently, I have been thoroughly heterosexual. Well for the most part. I always thought some girls were really good looking and got nervous around them, but I didn't think anything of it. I've been getting more curious, but I am already in a relationship that I have no intention of leaving.
Neither one of us are interested in threesomes. I'd be too jealous and so would he. Humans are humans to us, regardless of gender, so experimenting with a girl would still be considered cheating. I was the one that decided that, so he isn't being controlling in any way. The only thing I have to do with that part of my sexuality is watch some lesbian porn every now and then.
This makes my boyfriend feel inadequate and really jealous. That makes me feel guilty. But I don't want to just let that part of myself go. I feel like that would do more harm than good.
So what should I do? | Don't say threesomes. The rest is just backstory.* |
t3_wq430 | relationships | DAE in a long relationships ever get HUGE crushes on on other people, sometimes without even talking to them? | It's hard to explain, and I know I will catch crap for this. I have been dating my GF for 3 years ( I am male 25 and she is 22). I started a new job and there is a very attractive girl and I never spoke to her, and it's a huge place so I don't plan on ever talking to her, but I feel like I have a crush on her. I project all my perfect girl qualities on her and imagine how great it would be to be with her.
My GF and I have our share of problems, we do fight, we are not perfect but I am in love with her 100% and would never and never have cheated. I am curious if this is a normal feeling other people get? | I get crushes on women, sometimes without even talking to them.. i have a gf of 3 years. |
t3_qi2ik | running | How long did it take you to "heal" from ITBS? | I put heal in quotes because I am not sure if I am ever going to heal.
Putting the following in a numbered list for easy reading!
1. I ran my first Marathon October 15th of 2011, and I have been injured since. Mile 19 of the Marathon is when the pain came on, so I limped the last 7 miles and finished at 4:46 in incredible pain.
2. Took a month off from running and then did a 5K, and the pain as still there, showing up after 100 meters.
3. Had an MRI done and everything checked out OK, except for some inflammation around the IT band close to the knee (where my pain is).
4. Took November, December, January and February off from running.
5. Started seeing a physical therapist twice a week in late January. They have had me working mostly on core strength and stability, with the occasional massage, for over a month now.
6. Last week, at my 1-month mark, they put me on the treadmill to see if I had gotten any better. This was my first time running since early November, and I couldn't make it more than a half mile before the ITBS started to flare up, and by .9 mile, I had to stop running.
* I rock climb three days a week, and I don't have any pain there. The pain only appears when running, and not immediately, taking about a half of a mile to show up.
My question is, should it take this long to get better? Am I missing something obvious to fix an ITBS issue? | ITBS. Took 3 months off, followed by a month of Physical Therapy. No better. Normal? I am desperate. |
t3_nsnac | AskReddit | Am i addicted? | Hey there, I have a question that has been bothering me for quite a while. I am not a native english speaker so excuse me if I make some weird sentences, just yell at me in the comments.
Now, on to my question, the thing is... I have the feeling I might be addicted to gaming and i would really appreciate it if someone that actually knows what they're talking about would evaluate my behavior, which i'll describe as good as i can.
I've been playing video games as long as I remember, it started with small things, playing for maybe half an hour or an hour max as a child since the computer we had was placed in the living room and me being smaller so it was easier for my parents to control my gaming behavior. These small hours rapidly started to grow out to full days of gaming every now and then when i finally got a desktop in my own room, and now that I am 18 years old i recently started playing world of warcraft because a friend of mine started playing again and i thought it would be fun to join in. The first few days I've been grinding non-stop and even neglected some things i have to do in real life, which my mom made a comment about that made me wonder if I am easilly addicted to a game.
On one side I think I actually AM ADDICTED, since i play alot, and every now and then I actually forget to do something IRL or go to bed at late hours just because I want to finnish this one more quest or get this one more piece of equipment. But on the other side I think it's nothing out of the ordinary because everytime a friend calls if I want to go grab a beer the choice is easy for me and I'll just go socialize.
Since I'm not sure which one of the two it is, I'd be real happy if someone with (professional?) experience would reply and give their opinion. Am I just a lazy 18 year old that plays games because he doesn't have anything else to do, or am I a beginning addict that just isn't over the point where he gives up his social life yet? | 18 year old IT student that still socializes when someone calls but sometimes neglects schoolwork/goes to bed too late to finnish quests considers wether he is getting addicted or not. |
t3_3lm5vz | relationships | My SO [25 F] is living off my [33 M] money, and is surprised that I am pissed off about it by now | I have been with my SO for about a year now.
She is currently a student in a small town about 60km from where I live.
For the last abut 2 months she has been living with me (semester holidays), and I have to pay for almost everything.
Food, entertainment, going out - occasionally I find a new pack of milk in the fridge, of which she expects me to appreciative beyond belief.
My birthday is coming up in 2 days, I did not really plan anything like a party, since it is on a workday, and I would have rather held a party during the WE, but she already invited a whole bunch of people (without telling me) and made me buy loads of food, which I now also had to help prepare, while she turned the kitchen into a mess (she does this every time, and then just leaves everything where it is, until I either get angry or clean it up myself).
She says she is doing all of it for me, and I should appreciate all her efforts, but really, it feels like buying my own presents, and having her wrap them and afterwards thanking her for all her creativity.
Whenever I bring up the topic of money, she throws a fit and the argument is never resolved.
I could need some helpful advise on how to tackle this situation. | My girlfriend takes it for granted that I pay for everything. She wants to throw me a party for my birthday, but I have to pay for everything. It feels absurd. |
t3_2ypsqh | relationships | Last night I found out that my [F 21] boyfriend [M 27 ]gave at least two men handjobs for money. Please help | Last night I was up late. I saw his phone go off with a text "Hey ;) I'm in (our city)". I googled the number and found it was for a female escort. I woke him up and confronted him. He told me that he had given men handjobs for money. When I asked him about the hookers text he denied anything.
Now this is not the first time something like this has happened. About a year ago I found that he asked a hooker for sex. I was upset but we stayed together.
He made it out to be that he was trying to provide for us, that he didnt want me to worry about money, he just wants me to be happy etc...
This morning he signed up for a sex addiction workshop.
Should I just end it ? We've been together 4 years. I don't know what to do and am seeking opinions. Part of the reason I have stuck around is because he is always very nice and kind to me. We can afford a nice apartment together. If I break up I would go back to my mom's house that is dirty. And without him I would have no social life.. | My boyfriend confessed he gave other men hand jobs for money. Possible seeing an female escort too. |
t3_3hqnaz | relationships | Bf[26] talking to his ex while I'm [27] pregnant | I found out i was pregnant about a month ago.. we have our first prenatal appointment coming up in a week. We have been dating for a year and a half. I just found out that my boyfriend has been texting his ex.. who is now married with kids.. he doesnt tell me, but her name popped up while his phone was on the bed.. and I saw plenty of texts from her and him when i opened it up.
I feel really betrayed as I do not like him talking to her especially because she is married and I am pregnant and just feel disrespected by it when he does. I do not know if i should confront him about it or not... because I know it will result in huge argument and dont know if its worth it. I've told him numerous times I don't like him talking to her so now I feel like he does it behind my back.
Both of them had an affair with each other while he had a girlfriend and she was engaged to the guy she is married now. This was before I met him, I just know of the history and don't feel comfortable with it. | Im pregnant but boyfriend texting his ex.. should i confront him about it? |
t3_ot9xw | AskReddit | What's the one lie you wish you could take back? Why? | Mine may not be as life-altering as some others'. When I was into drugs really bad, lying was quite typical. There was always an explanation needed for where I was, why it took so long, and perhaps why I was acting strangely. The worst lie, however, was blowing an entire paycheck ($1,600) on drugs and claiming that I was robbed (at gunpoint) after cashing said paycheck. Not only was it not believable, but simply a bad lie. I was called out immediately (by my mother). I suck at lying.
In the end, getting caught was the best thing that happened to me. | I was a shithead but now I'm not as much of a shithead. |
t3_lxn27 | AskReddit | Does anyone know how long it would take for a drain to be blocked by grease? | Our drain in our rented house was blocked by grease, but we've only been living here about 2 months. 4 of us in the house, pretty average usage of the kitchen sink. We aren't convinced that we've been putting enough greasy things down the sink in order to block it in that short a time.
We think it'll have been contributed to by the previous tenants. He brought in a plumber to sort it and said that if it was indeed grease blocking it, we'd have to pay the cost. Soooo, I'm really hoping people might know that it'd take longer than that for blockage to happen! | Can someone tell me it takes longer than 2 months to block a drain with grease, or I'll be charged. |
t3_2fg2ql | relationships | So I have a friend [20/F] confused with what's really going on between her and her ex[22/M]. Any thoughts? | He distanced himself from her after their messy break-up.
They lost contact.
After 8 months, she finally apologized for all what she have done and accepted that they can't be together anymore.
They resumed their platonic friendship from before he confessed his feelings.
She asked him for a copy of LoL installer.
They met in a branch of Mcdo after his work shift.
They had breakfast while catching up.
He bought her a happy meal as an apology for being late.
Who can't resist a nifty little toy?
She happy accepted his gift.
He asked her if she'd like to hang-out with their mutual friends.
She went with him to meet the others and catch up with them.
Time passed, all other friends are being lovey dovey.
*awkwardness ensued*
He laid down on a couch with his feet on her lap trying to catch some z's.
Still platonic, right?
She started picking his leg hair with her bare hands.
Totally platonic.
He noticed that she looked melancholic.
She divulged that her dog got ran over.
He locked her in a hug.
She tried to break free.
He kissed her nose.
She stopped resisting and silently cried to sleep since she feel secure in his arms.
When she woke up, he rested his forehead on hers and smilingly greeted her "goodmorning!"
Turned out that she slept 'til noon.
"What now?" she asked me.
Turned out that she's to afraid to ask since she might loose him again.
She really enjoys his company.
---
This is what I understood from her story. I also got confused.
He seemed so determined not to back with her.
What do you think? | My friends broke up. Had no contact for 8 months. She lost her dog. He let her cry on his shoulder and kissed her nose. What do you think is in his mind? |
t3_1rk2hi | relationship_advice | GF sharing bed with gay friend - Am I overreacting? | Okay, so I hope this is the right section and everything - it's my first post on Reddit...
Anyways, I'm together with my GF for one and a half years now. Her best friend is a gay male. At least once a week they meet for lunch, dinner or to have a drink together.
I'm totally fine with that.
The thing that gives me headaches is the fact that they sometimes sleep together in the same bed. I mean okay, she's saying he's gay, but he is still a man.
If I tell her that I feel uncomfortable about it, she tells me that I don't understand the relationship between them and that it's nothing I have to worry about.
I met the guy like 3 or 4 times but never really talked to him, so how should I understand the relationship? I often tell my GF that she should invite her gay friend when we go out, but she almost never does it and IF she asks him to come with us, he doesn't want to.
Maybe I could understand the situation if I knew the guy?
A few months ago we had a discussion about the bed-sharing. After that she still slept at his place but she told me she was sleeping in his brothers bed (his brother is rarely at home).
But when my GF went to his place last week, the brother was back home for the weekend, so my GF slept in her gay friends bed again.
Yesterday she told me that she's going on holiday with her gay friend. They'll share a bed in the hotel for one week. They booked the trip before she told me.
I'm a bit freaking out right now, it feels like she doesn't care at all about my opinion/feelings. Am I overreacting? What can I tell her so she understands my point? | GF has a gay male best friend. They're going on vacation for a week and will share a bed in the hotel. I'm not okay with that. What to do? |
t3_4g8bo6 | relationships | Does my boyfriend sound inconsistent to you? 25F and 28M, 2 years 4 months | My boyfriend says he wants to be able to have alone time because he is introverted. We don't live together. I usually see him at his place from Saturday afternoon to Sunday afternoon so that he can have alone time on Sunday evenings. I can accept that he needs to be alone sometimes.
He doesn't see his friends often, maybe once every few weeks. He saw a friend last weekend. They met on Saturday afternoon and his friend left on Sunday evening. Fair enough, he doesn't see his friends a lot but I can't help feeling angry and rejected because I often feel like my boyfriend rushes me out his front door every Sunday afternoon so that he can be alone. It's not like I overwhelm him either - we send a handful of texts to each other everyday and I see him for a total of only 24 hrs a week. | My boyfriend limits the time we spend together because of his introversion and want of alone time but the same rules don't seem to apply to his friends, although he does see them a lot less than he sees me. Does my boyfriend sound inconsistent to you though? |
t3_i8zmo | AskReddit | Has there ever actually been footage caught of a ghost on tape? Like, actually? | Look. There have been tens of shows about ghosts on the syfy channel and travel channel and what not...but they all have one thing in common. They're over-produced, heavily over edited, and annoyingly void of any sort of substantial evidence whatsoever. Just people breathing heavily, creepy music, flashes, loud noises, and bullshit.
Youtube is a difficult place to search "Ghost on tape", because most of it seems like someone tried to create their own "Paranormal Activity" in their house. Or someone just shopped something into a pre-existing video.
So, Reddit. I was wondering if there has ever been footage that has universally been deemed as unexplainable, weird, or perhaps to contain paranormal activity in it. No scams, no editing, no b.s.
I don't believe in ghosts, but this is mostly due to the large amount of bullshit surrounding them on cable tv shows. | Answer the subject question. |
t3_4rfrdl | relationships | Me [28 M] with my coworker [23 F] she called me sexist because i did want her to lift something very expensive and heavy. | I'm nit sure if this is the right sub for this.
i work in a furniture store and most of the stuff here is expensive (think 3,000-10,000$ items) and heavy. we get good business and it pays well considering the hours.
today we got a desk very nice looking (its a 4,000$ desk) it took 4 of us to get it inside. well the woman that ordered it came by and we were going to load it up into her truck.
my other coworker showed up and wanted to help but i told her no because she wouldn't be able to. she said why and i told her she wasn't strong enough, she looked at me stunned and said "because I'm a girl?" and i said yes.
she's a small girl (she's about 5'1 and a littke on the skinny side) I'm pretty sure there was no way she'd be able to lift it. after we loaded it into the car she said she didn't realize she was working with a "typical sexist guy" i asked what she meant.
she said i think she's not strong because shes a girl, i told her no but in this instance yes shes not strong. she said she's considering going to HR about this issue.
it was a 4,000$ desk that weighed a ton and took 4 of us to lift, i dont see how i was being sexist. i dont know what to do about this do i just ignore it or apologize or what? | my coworker thinks I'm sexist because i told her i didn't want her help lifting something heavy that was very expensive. |
t3_122f43 | relationship_advice | [22/F] Indecisive heart between two guys! (21/M and 25/M). Advice? | Here's the 411. I've been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for 6 months, but recently an old love has come back into the picture. The guy I'm with is great, funny, nice, and he does well with my 2 year old son. (My son's biological father is deceased so no; there isn't any baby mama/daddy drama or anything.) Like all people he does have some flaws and habits I can't stand, but a decent person none the less. The old love mentioned above has started talking to me more and more and I've been invited to go out with him next weekend. I feel guilty wanting to hang out with him, but excited and curious at the same time. We didn't break up on a bad note either, kind of open ended actually. It doesn't help that I still have this "searching" feeling in my heart for "the one." If my current boyfriend were "the one" this feeling would have subsided by now right? What do you think? Should I take a chance with the old love and see where it goes? Or should I just be complacent with what I have now even though I still feel something is missing? | Two dicks, one vagina. =/ |
t3_o1oiz | AskReddit | Need advice on appealing to my college's dean about being put on suspension. | Hey Reddit,
I'm currently a junior in college studying accounting. I was put on academic probation last semester due to low grades, and was supposed to bring my grades up by the end of this past semester (Fall 2011). I have been a really good student prior to these past 2 semesters, getting pretty much As an Bs only. Unfortunately, I was unable to bring my grades up and now am being told I will be put on suspension. Pretty much my last option is to try talking to my dean to persuade her not to. What I need advice on is how I should go about talking to her? Any suggestions on what I might say? My main obstacles have been having to work 4 jobs last semester while going to school full-time, and dealing with health problems as well as serious family issues which I cannot ignore. These have all definitely taken a toll on my grades but I do believe I don't deserve to be suspended. I have never actually failed a class at the school. Any suggestions on what I can say to the dean? Anyone ever been through this before and gotten out of it? Please help!!! | I need help avoiding suspension at school for low grades. Advice on how to appeal to my dean??? |
t3_21wm8x | relationships | Me [19F] with my SO [21M], 2+ years, I suddenly got a UTI. [NSFW] | I have been with my SO for over two years. I've been faithful to him during our whole relationship. We have sex fairly regularly, about two - three times a week.
Just last week, I went to my GP and got told that I have a UTI. I've never had one before, although I've been sexually active since I was seventeen.
I don't know too much about UTIs but I know they're usually transmitted sexually. I thought 'does this mean my partner has been unfaithful?' I realllllly don't think he has, but it is odd that I have gotten it all of a sudden. My SO has told me that he doesn't have any symptoms.
Anyone care to share their experiences/opinions? | I randomly got a UTI. Is it possible my SO cheated? |
t3_2wxko9 | relationships | My [26F], BF [28M] of 2+ years talking about leaving town without me | My BF has made it a point to let me know he's against long distance relationships, so being away for more than 2 months basically = breakup for either of us.
At first I just tried to ignore it, but in one instance he was just bringing it up too often, and I got a bit upset. He then thought he could placate me by saying we could still go on the little trips we had planned, that I should stay by his side until he had to go, maybe even send him off on the day of, and that we could still be friends after that.
It actually made me more upset (it sounded like he'd be using me)! I broke into tears and told him that if he was sure about this move, I would rather have broken up with him right then and there. He then said he'd try his best to include me, as he didn't want to break up right then. He ended up staying in town.
Since that incident he hasn't made any concrete plans to go anywhere, but still brings it up every once in a while. He doesn't usually object if I invite myself along (or subtly hint it), but he's only included me in his plans once or twice.
I don't want to be unsupportive, it seems like it's really his dream to leave town someday (though he's pretty impulsive about it, and rarely has the same plans/location in mind twice). Whenever he brings it up these days I try to be 'mature' about it and keep it to myself, and end up being almost depressed for the next few days.
I'm dreadfully afraid of sitting down to talk about this seriously, I've always felt like the one more invested in the relationship, and that it'd just scare him away.
Any advice please? | boyfriend likes talking about leaving town without including me, absolutely doesn't do long distance, and it really sucks. What do I do? |
t3_3b2w7g | relationships | My [14M] Ex-friend [14M] Will Not Go Away | There is always 'that kid' at every school that anyone has ever been to. You know, the one that is disliked almost universally? Sometimes, it's unjustified. For this? Maybe, but that's beside the point. For a long time I hung out with this guy. Let's call him... Caelan.
He would always want to hang out, probably beacuse of his lack of other social interaction. That's cool, he was cool, but he always was a bit of a dick for no reason. Me being that one nerd that no one wants to socialize with, I guess we were fish and water. But as the years went on, I developed other friends, he developed other friends, and his dickish tendencies multiplied. His new friends are completely stereotypical console peasants, sitting in their dilapidated room on their x-box screaming about snoop dog.
Regardless of that, and perhaps because of that, I have been attempting to cut him out for the last three months. Not calling him, cancelling arangements, all the typical anti-social things to do. I hoped he would get the memo. He didn't. Even now, I have literally been telling him bluntly to his face to go away, piss off my pencil case, not commentate on everything I do etc, he is persistent. To the point where I just fucking cannot stand it. I am increasingly being angry to the point where I feel it's not long before I bubble over. I've already been in trouble for stabbing him with a pencil after he came across the classroom in geography to grab my pencil case.
How about a list of things he does even now!:
* Copies everyone's jokes, changes them nonsensically and repeats them.
* Randomly grabs shit off my desk/out of my bag for no reason.
* Always just happens to be going to lessons the same way as me, and follows me.
* Butts in on conversations that don't concern him.
* When groups are being formed, deliberately stay to the side so he's left over, join my group and cite that he couldn't join anyone else. | Ex-friend I've been trying to cut out persists in following me, copying me, and commentating on everything I do. |
t3_43b5va | tifu | TIFU by making an abortion joke to a checkout girl. | Okay, like most, this didn't happen today, but it did happen about 10 days ago whilst I was on the way to see my girl (we'll call her Ellie). She was worried because we'd had a lot of unprotected sex that month and her period was due and she hadn't came on. Me being the woman pleaser I am decided to drop by a store to grab her a pregnancy test to stop the worrying. Soon enough I find what I was looking for and made my way to pay, as I'm waiting I see that there are some lotto scratchers and figured I would buy myself one. I am now at the checkout and as the pregnancy test is being scanned I also ask for a scratcher. As the scratcher was being handed to me I said "This decides whether we keep it or not" with a very childish smirk on my face, it's safe to say the look I got explained that my humour is too dark for checkout girls so I threw the money at her before having a chance to tell her it was a joke and I got the fuck out. | Made an abortion joke whilst purchasing a pregnancy test and a scratcher. Cashier didn't share my dark sense of humour. |
t3_1jhycy | relationships | Me[22M] with my [32M] BF of two years, is he cheating? | Ive been with my BF for 2 years now and things have been rocky here and there mostly about sex. I have a high sex drive and he tends to have a low sex drive.
Anyways I have snooped on him before and found him flirting with old friends and ex-boyfriends on Facebook. Making plans to visit with out me, asking for self made porn, possibly skyping. We had a big fight when I confronted him about it and he made it sound like it was his plan to trap me the whole time. So i blew it off and decided to move on, but kept it on the back of my mind.
Now just recently I decided to look again and found him talking to someone I dont know. Telling him that he is tired of "chasing" him around. That he misses him. And now he received a dick pic from the guy titled "Here you go". I guess what Im asking is should I be worried? Is he cheating? Should I confront him? | BF emails someone I dont know saying he misses them and wants dick pic. |
t3_22taq8 | relationships | [dating] Me [M/16] and my best friend [M/16] have entered a relationship but nothing has changed | We have been close friends with him for around 3 years and we have always known about each other's sexuality.
One day a few months ago, he mentioned how it was weird we had never done anything together and we shrugged it off because we didn't want to make the friendship weird. Having liked him for a year it was hard to hear.
Well at a drunken birthday a month ago (I know underage but not important right now) two of my friends who knew about my feelings for him had decided to tell him. I appreciate it now knowing I couldn't tell him myself but I gave them a stern talking too about secrets.
Then two weeks ago he told me that he wanted to try out a relationship but despite the fact we are now technically in a relationship everything is the same, even when we are in private we act exactly the same.
Though I'm happy in the relationship I had expected things to change between us but they haven't and I want to get closer to him but I don't know if I should wait or if I should tmake the initiative and try to get closer. What should I do? | Started a relationship with my best friend but nothing has changed when I feel it should have, what do? |
t3_1f1nlo | relationships | Thinking of breaking up with bf [m 21] of 3 months, need advice. | My boyfriend [m 21] and I [f 19] have been in a relationship for 3 months, soon to be 4 months. The relationship has been good for the most part, it started off very intense, but lately I have been thinking of breaking up with him.
In the beginning of the relationship, he told me stories of his exes but in all honesty a lot of the stuff he said back then based on what he told me now doesn't add up really, when I really think about it. We talked about our pasts, I was honest with mine to him. I wasn't sure if I was being irrational or 'picky' so I let it go.
I have a lot of baggage from a previous relationship-- I dated a compulsive liar in the past who also used me physically & financially-- it was my fault for allowing my ex to treat me this way, but it has really fucked me up in the head when it comes to trusting what guys say. I second guess everything constantly.
I just feel like I can't fully trust my current bf, and the thought of me ending it is becoming more prominent in my brain. I have also caught him in a few other lies I guess, or things that just don't add up-- he seems to change his story sometimes.
We are also in a sort of LDR right now -- it didn't start off that way but we both went home for college during the summer so now we are an hour or so (if traffic is minimal) apart from each other, I love him a lot but it costs a lot for us to see each other and before we left for school we were together constantly, and now it's getting harder for me to adjust to this new LDR thing.
Despite what I wrote, I do love him, but sometimes I see myself being happier single... but I love him and I know he loves me, but I also know it's not fair to him for me to stay with him if I keep having these thoughts. I've become more distant and I'm reluctant to start chats with him unless he starts talking to me first. I feel really confused and upset, and I'm just looking for advice. | started off my relationship really intensely, now I'm having thoughts of breaking up with my bf because some of the stuff he has told me about his past/exes does not really add up-- but I'm not sure if I'm overreacting. The thought of breaking up with him is constant for me but I don't know what to do. I'm 19, he's 21. |
t3_4bhvp5 | personalfinance | Should I pay off my student loan quickly or just use the cheap money? | I recently graduated, and have accepted a great offer, with only ~$5500 of a federally subsidized student loan. The minimum payment is only going to be like ~$50 and I'm not a big spender to begin with, so I could theoretically pay it off in a matter of months. I'm not sure what the benefit of paying it off so early would be though if I have 10 years to pay it off and at 3.4% APR, I'm looking at basically ~$1k in interest over the 10 years. The way I look at it, I could put the money I would put forward to paying off my loan early, into a Roth IRA, or hell even buy a T-bond with it and probably come out ahead. And I get the added benefit of a 10 year loan on my credit without a missed payment (I actually have enough cash in other investments that if SHTF, I could pay the whole thing off in one fell swoop if need be). | Am I playing with fire by keeping a loan around that I could easily pay off, or is it worth it just for the credit score and cheap capital? |
t3_4cdkb8 | relationships | Me [30 M] with my date [28 F] 3 weeks - met online, gone on several dates. Can't get a read on whether she's just shy or not interested | Hello relationships!
So I met this seemingly awesome girl online, we hit it off, and met up to go out on a first date for brunch and an outdoorsy activity. It went long (6 hours), but we had fun and have been out together several times since. We also have plans to go out later this week too.
The catch is, I can't get a read on her. When we text, it's like smilies all over the freaking place and emojis, but in person she seems super shy, doesn't talk much, and doesn't seem like a strong conversationalist, so I tend to do a lot of topic leading and trying to draw her out...
Her behavior is now starting to make me feel super insecure about where I stand in this, lol. Due to a LTR followed by a pretty long period of not having interest in dating, I came back into it and now it's all about online dating it seems, which I have little to no experience with. It just feels like it's moving a lot slower than if I would have met her in person to start and asked her out.
What to do! Should I just sack up and be like "Hey, I like you but I can't get a read on what's going with you" or ask how she feels?? I feel like an idiot that I'm going through this again, but now at age 30, and I feel more aimless as I did in my late teens and early 20s due to being out of the dating scene for so long. | Met girl online, I have no online dating experience. Went out on a few dates, can't get a read on her. Should I just ask her point blank how she feels? |
t3_2u3te5 | relationships | Ex Girlfriend [20 F] of 2 years, cheated on her boyfriend [33 M] with Me [20 M] Need advice. | This started at the beginning of her relationship, roughly a month ago. She came over to my house probably 2 weeks after they were dating because they were fighting. We had a couple drinks and ended up having sex. After we had sex she sat there bawling her eyes out for about an hour, going on about what a terrible person she was. I felt bad about the situation as well, and we agreed to not have contact with each other again.
Fast forward to a few days ago, her birthday. She sends me a text saying "cant even wish me a happy birthday?" I didn't respond. 2 days after that I get a text message from her again, saying "........"
I replied asking what she wanted. We talked for about an hour, her basically telling me she wasnt doing well mentally or emotionally and she needed someone to talk to. I asked her why she couldnt talk to her boyfriend and and she responded with "a boyfriend and a best friend are 2 separate things." I told her I didn't feel comfortable driving out to see her, and honestly I feel like that would still in some way be her cheating, which I dont want any part of.
I am in still in love with her and I want to be there for her as a friend but I dont think I can make that work. I want nothing more than to have my old best friend to talk to, she knows me better than even my closest friends. | Ex who I am in still in love with, cheated on her bf with me. wants to continue a relationship with me as "friends." I want to but I know I cant as long as she is in a relationship with someone else. |
t3_l9srp | GetMotivated | Thanks wolves. | [This is me] right before I led my second Zombie Walk.
Normally I'm kind of reserved when I'm around people I don't know. Normally I don't like to be noticed for the things I do. But I organized this walk (and the small one the year before), set up specials downtown with the bars, and then in the end had 500+ people rallied around me and following me down the streets in zombie attire.
You guys helped me get to where I was able to do that, you guys made me realize that if I don't try to out do myself each time then it's not worth the effort.
The crowd this year was over twice the size, people even showed up after the walk dressed cause of the drink specials so downtown looked overrun that night.
So again, thanks for the words, examples, and giving me the motivation to not be satisfied with being average. You guys kick ass. | Wolves kick ass at helping me be a bad ass Zombie Pimp. |
t3_15l7yz | relationships | My boyfriend [M21] lied to me and I [F19] need help getting over it. | My boyfriend [M21] and I [F19] have been dating for about 13 months. When we started dating I knew a lot of his friends were females- which I was completely fine with. Men and women can totally be friends- that's never been a concern of mine. However, when we started dating I noticed that his female friends at our school treated me pretty poorly- it turned out that one of them had a major thing for him. This all was it's own issue and I'm over that- after all of this (and early on in the relationship) I asked him if he had any flings or anything with his other female friends (I really didn't want to go through the same treatment with his other female friends- both at our school and in his hometown). He told me that he and his female friends were just friends and nothing had ever happened between them- and I trusted him and believed him for months.
Around our one year anniversary he admitted that he's made out/felt up/fingered all of his female friends- literally every single one. He went as far to say that he still wishes he had gotten a blow job from one. I was incredibly angry that he lied but became even more angry when I thought about our relationship and the things he's done with them since then.
He won't be seen in photographs with me, he won't hold my hand when people he knows are around- let alone anything else, yet he'll hold them close in photographs. Last Christmas, he took a girl that he's friends with and had a fling with to pick out my Christmas gift. On top of this all, when we fight, he would trash talk me with these girls.
I resent him for what he's done and that he's lied. But I really need help getting over it. Please, help me reddit? | Boyfriend lied to me for a year about his relationships with his female friends. I'm angry, help me get over it- please? |
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