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t3_3iyfij | relationships | I'm [23 M] seeing a girl [19 F] and it's going to be her first time. Can I get some advice on how to handle it and make it a good experience for her? | We've been dating about a month and a half. Things are going really well and it's apparent we both like each other.
I spent the night at hers and things got going. She seemed incredibly nervous and I asked if it was her first time. It was. I slowly stopped things and told her to go on her holiday that she had planned with her family and decide if she wanted me to be her first guy. I think she appreciated the lack of pressure I put on her?
Anyway, she later told me me that she would like things to get physical with me when she returns from her trip. That's great, right?
The thing is, I've never taken a girl's virginity. How do I make it a good experience for her? I'm actually worried about hurting her if I'm honest. She felt quite tight when I was exploring with my fingers.
Is it worth me purchasing some lubrication or will we be okay without it? Any other tips from girls about how I can make it pleasant and comfortable for her? | Got pretty close with a girl. She wants me to take her virginity. How do I make it a good and pleasant experience for her? |
t3_4npgi5 | relationships | How do I [36/m] get over "grass is greener syndrome" with my wife [30/f]? | I guess this is a post that's supposed to help me organize what I'm feeling as much as asking advice.
I've been with my wife, let's call her Sarah, for 9 years now, married for 3. We generally have a good relationship with no unusual amount of problems. We have a house and no kids. One thing that's hard is that since I'm working at university and Sarah is still a Ph.D. student, she's often gone for several months to do research. On average I'd say we're physically in the same place (East Coast) half the year. Partly as a result of that, we've cooled off on each other a bit, even though we still really enjoy each other's company.
During the last period she was away I've developed an absolutely massive attraction to a grad student / work colleague, let's call her Michelle [24/f], that works closely with me. The whole "teacher attracted to younger student" thing has never been an issue for me in the years I've been working, so this is unusual.
All the usual stereotypes apply: Michelle is lots of things my wife isn't, among them younger, outgoing, interested in pretty much exactly the things I am, and attractive with a completely different look than Sarah. I think a good part of the attraction is mutual - and yes, I believe I can distinguish between someone who laughs because they want their de facto superior to like them, and someone who feels a connection. I'm certainly conscious of letting her initiate most of the contact (talks, coffee, field trips), and not constantly come on to her creepily.
Long story short: I'm constantly thinking about whether my attraction to Michelle is "real", or just a symptom of Sarah not being there. And whether my attraction signifies that my marriage isn't all that it's cracked up to be. Is this just a case of "grass is greener syndrome", or is it telling me something deeper? | like wife, wife often gone, massive crush on younger colleague. Normal or real problem? |
t3_4lrilb | relationships | Best advice/wisdom for Me [23M] when dating someone new [23F] after being out of the game! | (background) So I'm a 23 year old guy who has had one gf previously at the age of 18, and has now been single for about 3 years. There's no particular reason for being single, I just decided to work on myself and discover who I truly am, before deciding to get in to another relationship.
What is the best advice you could give me at the beginning of a new relationship with someone (dating stage), as I feel like I've been out of the game for a long time? Maybe some golden wisdom you wish you figured out earlier which has only came from experience! | Best advice for new relationship after being out of the game/unexperienced? |
t3_x5m92 | AskReddit | Lazy lyrics and grammatical mistakes in chart-topping popular songs drive me crazytown-bananapants. Any other sticklers out there with examples to share? | 1) Pink - Just Like A Pill
"I can't stay on your life support, there's a shortage in the switch."
No there isn't. There's a *short* in the switch. Unless she's referring to a situation where they have run out of usable switches
2) Barenaked Ladies - If I Had a Million Dollars.
"I'd buy you a K car // a nice reliant automobile."
That would be terrible. That means the automobile would always rely on you. The word they are looking for is *reliable*.
3) Carrie Underwood - Before He Cheats
"Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool-stick..."
Almost forgivable. But technically, it'd be called a pool-cue, without affecting the syllable count in the song. Easy fix.
4) Fergie - Big Girls Don't Cry
"And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket // But I've got to get a move on with my life"
WTF. A long string of words shoehorned into a short space, and it doesn't even pay off with a rhyme. The second line could have easily ended with the word "yet," and been vastly improved. | I should really stop listening to pop music on the radio and stick to my own library |
t3_2jpacs | relationships | How to ask my [22F] FWB [28M] to not have sex with other people. | Okay, so I know the answer is ultimately to "just tell him," but I was hoping other people would guide me on how to handle the situation.
FWB is the best way to describe the situation, but I don't think it's really accurate. We found each other online, and after some talking, we basically met up with the intention of having sex. Fun was had for a few months until I went back to school.
We've been texting ever since and I can't get a good read on how he feels about me. I honestly hate relying on texting as communication, but it's the only option. Maybe I'm naive, but why would he keep texting me if I'm so far away and he can just hook up with other girls?
I know he has since hooked up with other people, and technically that's fine since we aren't in a relationship. But on the inside it absolutely crushes me because I am a monogamous person by nature. I'm very aware he's not my boyfriend, but I personally don't want to have sex with other people. If it's important, I do think I like him, but it doesn't mean I want him to be my boyfriend... which I don't.
I at least know he wants to have sex with me, and we are going to meet up in a couple weeks when I visit home. Then I'll be home for Thanksgiving, and then again for winter break. My question is, is there a casual way to ask him to not sleep with other people for the next couple months? If he says no, that would be perfectly fine (although it would take me some time to get over), and I would break it off. I just want to ask in a way that doesn't make me seem clingy. Do I ask before sex? After? Right before I leave? Or earlier so he has time to think about it and respond?
Or, do I just leave it alone altogether and see how things go? Although I'm not really sure I'm capable of doing that. | FWB is hard to read. How do I ask him not to fuck other girls even though I don't want him to be my boyfriend? |
t3_376m5z | relationships | Me [16 M] with my friend/crush [16 F] Any advice on the whole hand holding business? Funny stories or things I should know? | Is there any advice you can give me in terms of hand holding. Sounds really pathetic but probably hard to know when its suitable or when it is not.
Anything that is helpful such as when she wants you to hold your hand, will she want to hold hands on a first date, any ways in which you can initiate holding hands so its subtle and any signs she doesn't want to hold hands.
I know it is not kissing, but at least it will make the mode more romantic...
Also, any funny stories that happened to you while you were holding hands or tried to? | Any advice on holding hands? How to initiate holding hands? Signs she wants to/doesnt want to hold hands? etc. |
t3_1blula | jobs | I've been posting here for advice frequently, but I finally got a job interview for tomorrow as well as a call back for another resume submission in an entirely different field. Can I get some point of views? | Sorry for the long title and frequent posts. I really like to hear what people have to say about their views, especially when it comes to being employed. This post is my way of planning ahead for possible events.
So, I'm pretty excited right now. I'm a student, and I've been job hunting for several months, and my old seasonal employer decided suddenly to replace me, so I've been under a bit of pressure to find something. I have an interview for customer service position, probably front desk, at a hotel in a sort of tourist town outside of my own home town. I've never worked in a hotel, but I've been a hostess before. Is there anything I should expect in that position if they did decide to hire me?
Also, I got positive feedback and a "We'll see you on Friday" thing from a warehouse for a summer temporary position. I'm a girl, and they know that, and I'm also aware of the work environment in warehouses, but they wanted to do some more face to face stuff and have further explanation about the position at a college job fair that my school is hosting this week. Working there may be a possibility, but my concern is about accepting a job offer, or getting multiple offers.
**What should I do if I get multiple job offers?**
Should I ask if I can think about it for a day or two and then get back to them?
Or if I'm waiting for a call from one company, say, the one that is a non-temporary position, and the temporary position calls first?
I'm very excited, but I'm stressing out and want to plan ahead. | Finally got some response from a company for an unofficial interview this Friday and an official interview tomorrow from another company. What should I do in the event I get two job offers? |
t3_3i6pbt | relationships | My wife [32 F] wants to have a child, I [31 M] don't | I'm 31 year old man and I'm having a trouble in my marriage. My wife ( she's 32) wants a child, I don't. We are married for 5 years.
We discussed this subject many times before our marriage. I told her I never want to have children and asked whether she's ok with it. She was like – yes, it's perfectly fine. So I don't really understand her problem now.
In the last time all she talks about is how wonderful it would be if we would be three and that we should have a baby. I understand that she could have changed her mind, but I have not. She knows very well that I hate children and that I don't plan being a parent ever. I offered her to get a divorce so she can marry some other man who wants children. She refused, she says she loves me and I'm the only man whose child she wants to have.
A few days ago I accidentally overheard my wife talking to her friend, who was giving her advices about our situation. Her friend said that my wife just has to get pregnant and I'll love the baby. There was also something about damaging a condom and coming off the pill without telling me.
I would be very angry if she did something of it, so I guess it's good I overheard it, because now I don't know whether it's safe to have sex with her. She thinks that I just don't want to have a child with her. I love this woman, but I don't want to have children. Not with her, not with any other woman. I know I'd rather live without her than have child. | Actually I'm kind of upset about it. Why did she marry me while she knew our desires are not the same? What should I do? |
t3_2hvc18 | tifu | TIFU by storing porn on my computer | This happened the other day. Ono of my family's friend (female, and I'm a male) asked me to help her make a website with an online website builder. So I invited her over and we begun to work on my laptop. Everything went good, to the point when she wanted to put some galleries on the site. As I clicked the 'Add photos' button the file chooser came up, and showed a bunch of pictures of naked girls... I was totally embarrassed, so I quickly closed the file chooser, and said that I can't show her that functionality.
I thought that she didn't saw, but the look on her face said she saw everything, and now she thinks I'm a pervert. Fuck... | Accidentally showed my porn in a file chooser dialog window to one of my family's friend. |
t3_2ckd8c | relationships | How can I[26/F] get my boyfriend[29/M] interested in sex with me again? | My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 months and now we haven't had sex in 2 weeks. We were online friends for about a year, and 2 months ago we finally met. In the beginning everything was great but I should have realized how weird it was that we've only had less than 6-7 sex in almost 2 months.
I care about him much and I try my best to be a good girlfriend. I have done and i still do everything I can to make him happy.
He also has a really close female friend who he texts to every day on the phone for hours. He cares about her very much and he thinks she's very pretty.
I'm really confused. I've never experience this kind of unwanted. Honestly, I think i'm pretty enough and it's always not hard for me to get a guy to like me. But now It seems like to me, he was not even interested in having sex with me at the first day we met (We had sex only 2-3 times in probably the first 2 weeks.). He didn't even seem like he enjoyed it when I give him oral sex few weeks ago.
Now even though he kisses me everyday but he's not trying to have sex with me... I feel unwanted and sexually frustrated by him. It makes me insecure every time he says how pretty other girls are. I am embarrassed of it and am afraid to touch him because I don't feel like he likes my body.
I don't know how to bring up the question and to get him interested in sex with me... | My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 months. He's not interested in sex with me...How can I do to make him want me? |
t3_4lmzw3 | relationships | Ex with depression [24F] wants to try dating me [24M] again after 2 months of being alone/away. Anyone deal with a depressed SO before? | My ex broke up with me because of her clinical depression. The whole time I was trying to help her, even after we broke up. At first she said she needed to be alone, then she started blaming me a bit for it, at which point I went no contact because it was hurtful. After almost 2 weeks of that I had to unblock and msg her to get her stuff at my apartment. Well, she gave me a huge spiel about how it wasn't my fault and she was sorry. She talked about how much it was hurting her too and she didn't even know why she did it, just she needed to be alone. She was in a very dark place when we broke up.
It made me feel better so we talked some more. She can't return to the city for at least another month for reasons outside her control. But she told me she was "very willing" and wanted to work at having a good relationship again when she gets back. So that makes it ~2 months of us being broken up before we try dating again.
I believe her when she says it's only the depression causing it and she still has feelings for me. She told me she didn't want to see/sleep with anyone, and this time is just to fix herself and be with family. I've read a lot on this topic so I understand she doesn't want the added pressure of a relationship when healing but I don't know what to do. I'm scared if it gets worse, or even if it just isn't as healed as she likes, she won't be willing to date anymore when the time comes.
Has anyone helped their SO through their depression? | Ex broke up with me to work on her depression, now she wants to try dating again in a month's time when we're both in the same city. I don't know what to do for that month. |
t3_3dtcxk | relationships | My [18 F] girlfriend doesn't think I [19M] want her anymore. | Well we've been dating for over a year now and there has been some problems with out relationship for the last two months. My girlfriend is concerned that I don't want her or want to be in the relationship.
She's wrong. I do want her, she's really the only one I want. I've tried explaining it to her we've had many many hours of conversations about this and I've told her that I just haven't showed it as much as I used to, but to no avail. She doesn't believe it, which is really frustrating because it's the truth.
She believes that I don't want to be intimate with her anymore it used to be when we saw each other we would have sex ~4 times. Now to me it seems it's about 2-4. I asked her about this and she was absolutely positive it was maybe once. Which I know for a fact is incorrect (I have condoms and I keep track) she's delusional about that.
I'm used to making grand gestures or doing something that takes more time to do but what she actually told me what the problem is, is the fact that I don't do the little things that show her every day that I want her. I don't act as interested in her as I used to be.
Anyways what are some ways I can show her that I'm still attracted to her and I want her. | my girlfriend needs to know that I want her just as much as I always did, and I don't know how to show It. |
t3_1hrapv | relationships | I've [20M] cheated on my gf [20F] of 3 years numerous times. Please help | As in the title, I am the cheater. I have cheated on my girlfriend on numerous occasions, making out with others or sleeping with them. She's discovered my past cheating and has been willing to look past it, but just as of last night I cheated on her with my best friend..
The complete feeling of guilt is haunting me, and I know it'd break her heart, but I just don't know how to approach her about everything.
We've been in a relationship for over 3 years, November will mark our 4th. I'm very disappointed in myself, but I don't know what to say, what to do, how to approach her. I've always been so frivolous and she's always been loyal. I feel terrible, but it was my choice of actions to do such things, sober or not. I'm a complete asshole, but I feel like I should be staying away from relationships at the moment. I'm 20 and I want to explore, live freely and have a care-free kind of life. I don't expect my girlfriend to look past this at all, and I know she may be furious with me. I think I've really done it this time, and I'm looking to end it. This hurts bad. I just really need some sort of advice. | Cheated on gf of 3 years many times. I feel guilty and I don't know how to approach her. I'm looking to end it to save her from myself. Where do I start |
t3_2cr38s | relationships | Me [17 M] with my girlfriend [17 F] of 2 months was sexually abused by her ex before we dated and doesn't want to even kiss or hug me. | When I started dating her, she was pretty cool and she still is. Then, one day she told me she didn't want to make out and do dirty things because "that's all me and my ex did, and we wouldn't talk at all." I thought that would be ok and maybe she would want to later.
Then, today (about a month later from when she told me she didn't want to make out) she told me that her ex abused her. She said he tried to take off her clothes and make out her and touch her. She said he gave her bruises and she had terrible anxiety around him. She kept on talking about him for an hour. I felt bad because I didn't know how to help her.
She explained to me why that's the reason she didn't want to make out.
Then, about 30 minutes after she left my house, she apologized over text that she talked about him too much. Also, she said that she gets scared when we kiss and hug and she doesn't want to.
i don't know what to do, I really like her, but as a 17 year old guy I need to have some contact. She's my first real girlfriend so I want to know how to make-out before I move on to college. I know that sounds selfish but, that's how I honestly feel
Also, she's only told me and her aunt. She doesn't want to tell her parents because then her ex could get in trouble and her parent could make her break up with me. I think that she should tell someone about this and get help because she has bad anxiety when people touch her, but she won't. | Girlfriend was sexually abused and doesn't want to kiss or even hug. I didn't know that at the beginning off the relationship. What should I do. |
t3_2zuttx | offmychest | I'm going to cut contact with my extended family. | I found them myself when I was 13, now 4 years ago, through facebook. They're all from my fathers side.
I never had contact with them up until I was 13 because my father vehemently dislikes his parents and my mothers contact with them had faded out over the years. I never had grandparents or cousins my own age growing up, and I also had a very tumultuous childhood that wasn't always happy. Not having grandparents had always, and still does, left me feeling like something was missing.
So I made that contact after spending hours searching for relatives through facebook, and I made that first meeting happen. It was everything I wanted; my grandparents doted on me, so did all these new aunts and uncles and extended family members. There was one issue of an Aunt who was in a different country sending terrible emails to my mother about how my father was disgusting and shameful for running away from the abuse he endured as a child. I never knew about that until recently.
But now they just avoid meeting me again. I really, -really- want to have grandparents as I never had them growing up. I want to meet all the family members I didn't see last time, see more pictures of my father as a kid. But my granddad ignored my message about travelling to see them, as did my aunts.
I really made the effort as just a 13 year old to try and see them and build up a relationship but they don't care, and now seeing their names on social media just hurts me. I feel they they don't care they have a granddaughter, niece and cousin out there who really missed out on them for most of her life. They've made no effort. | all my effort and love for a family I never had as a child is one-sided and I want to forget about them. |
t3_1em2et | relationships | I [19M] am confused about [20F] | I recently went home from college and I had been talking to this girl I've known for 3 months a bit more before I left. We cuddled all night long a few times the last week of classes but nothing more than that. I had been texting and snapchatting her every day since I went back home. Things were pretty flirtatious, but we never talked about where we stood because I wanted to talk about that in person. She still lives in my college town, and I visit there every other weekend.
I visited a few weekends ago, but I hung out with my other friend more. I personally was trying to decide who I wanted more in my life, and ultimately I chose this girl I'm writing about. I let her know I enjoyed my time with her, and really started giving her more attention.
The problem is that I assumed a few tweets she sent were about me. The way they were worded led me to relate them to what was going on between us. I sent out a few tweets kinda saying the same things and I thought we were at an understanding, but never got to talk about it due to our distance appart.
She told me today that she is too hung up on one of her friends, and he made her upset, and I'm kinda dumfounded. I think I assumed things too much, over-thought too much, and related too much to myself.
I just need advice on what's going on. I quickly rose to her top snapchat friend, and I know I am a really good friend of hers. This other guy is at our college town, so she gets to see him on the weekends. | Girl I've been talking to every day for a few weeks told me she is hung up on this other guy, and is upset at him. I related some tweets to myself when I don't think I should have, making me believe there was something there. |
t3_1fwdmn | offmychest | First time in trouble with the cops. | My friends and I were being dumb teenagers and lighting illegal fireworks off at a secluded beach I live near. A cop comes, takes the fireworks, searched my backpack for more fireworks, found my pipe, and takes away my weed away i had stashed away in a hallowed out book. I went out of my way to NOT sound as rude as possible, but when I said, "I thought I had the right to not be searched and seized" he put me in handcuffs and yelled in my face to stay quite. Since it was the first time I had ever been in trouble with the egotistical bastards, he let me and my friends go free of charge. I'm lucky I know, just pissed of how he belittled me like I was shit. | Young, dumb, and full of angst |
t3_2ea8kh | relationships | How do I [M/18] reestablish contact to her without seeming creepy? | Hi!
I'll first explain my situation.
I'm a guy, 18. I met this girl at an (anime) convention in my area. It was a chance encounter with some people through whom I met her, but we got along very well and spent most of the two convention days together.
I originally planned on asking her out for a hangout but unfortunately, at the second convention day I had to go home quite early (heavy storm warning for my hometown, so I was called home by my mother and needed to depart fast). It's been a month since then.
Fortunately, she gave me her phone number. She lives, like, 3 cities apart from me (though easy to reach due to good bus/train connections). We wrote each other a couple of times, but not very often.
Ladies of reddit, how can I re-establish contact/ ask for a hangout or even a date without seeming creepy? I don't even think I'm in love or anything but I'd just really like to see her again because she's a very fun person and it'd be a shame if contact were to crumble. I could only resort to text and as she lives a little bit (~20 miles) further away, just asking for meeting each other would seem weird wouldn't it? I mean I'd probably see her again at the next convention she's going to attend but that's another month and waiting even longer, I think, would not exactly make things less complicated. I just kinda... don't know how I should proceed. | met a girl, got along well, now confused as to how to ask her for a hangout/date/whatever because she doesn't live in immediate proximity. It's been a month and I don't know how I'm supposed to contact her for that without seeming creepy/like a pushover/like a jerk/ I dunno. I am just confused. |
t3_1mlbuq | loseit | Having a rough week; looking for support and advice [F/20/245/5'8"]. | Hey guys,
Life has been kind of stressful for me lately, and I am having a hard time maintaining my weight loss goal (I would like to lose at least 30lbs by the end of the year).
I am a full-time college student, and virtually full-time employee. I don't have a drivers license (but I am taking my test later today!), so I take public transportation everywhere. Usually, my commute time to work is 1 hour and then home is another 1 1/2 hours because of traffic/distance/etc.
Basically, my days are fully booked so I don't have very much time for fun, relaxation, or exercise.
I have lost 5lbs since I started lurking this subreddit, and I have been able to maintain that; however, my stress eating habits have kept me from losing anything else. *My biggest weakness is pizza.*
How do you guys avoid stress eating and maintaining a certain level of sanity when times are stressful?
Any help and advice would be greatly appreciated!
............................................................................................. | full-time female college student struggling with stress eating; looking for advice |
t3_qduis | AskReddit | Help me help myself, Reddit! | Reddit, I need your help.
I'd like to ask my girlfriend's father for her hand in marriage, but first I need to show him I can support her. Basically, I need to find work. I've been applying everywhere I can for a while now with no luck. The biggest problem I have is that I have no experience. I haven't had a real job yet; I haven't needed to. My dad has had a lot of design work for me through his various entrepreneurial endeavors, but things have been really slow for a while now, and there's no reason to believe it'll get better anytime soon. I'm trying to get a job, but I'm just not having any luck.
So that's where I could really use your help! I'm ready and willing to work, but I need clients. I can do web design, graphic design, animation, video production... the works. For example, I made every element in these two videos (graphics, animation, music, etc.):
So, Reddit, help me help myself. I really need clients! Remember, this is for love! | I need money so I can get married. I can do web design, graphic design, and animations. Check out the videos above. If I could do something for you or someone you know please help me out! This is for love, Reddit! |
t3_4gb1zp | Advice | What is the point of going anywhere in life? | So I'm a senior in high school about to reach graduation date three weeks from now. Even working 12 of 17 years of my life on this diploma, I just don't fucking care.
So what if I graduate? What was the point of school? I have ADD and I won't remember any of the shit I spent my whole life learning.
And if I do graduate, I still have to go to college for another four years. I only imagine college being worse than high school; like high school but without the fun. Just more intense studying and school work. I can't focus enough to do that shit.
And when I do graduate and get a job, then what? I work my entire life suffering work until I die? Only difference in how hard I work now depends on how hard will I be working my whole life.
Even if I did find a job that I "enjoy" I feel like I'm just always feeling like shit inside. I really have no goal in life and never have. I don't even know what career I want to pursue, I never want to do anything important.
My drive in life at one point was to find love but tbh love just seems like bullshit to me. Everyone I've ever known to be in a relationship has said that relationships suck and that being single feels more free. I can't even emotionally handle having friends that are girls because I always end up developing feelings for them.
I can't even have real fun with anybody either because I always feel like no one truly understands me. When a relationship feels like shit, it feels like shit. When a relationship feels perfect, it feels too fake. So I end up having this disconnection with people deep inside. I wish I could just appreciate the differences between us all.
I feel like by the time I get used to having a job and having a family, I'll just be one of those adults who are always stressed and dead inside. | Even if I do graduate and get a job, what's the point. |
t3_3xbcbm | relationships | Me [18M] with my crush [18 F] known for a few months, emotional confusion. | Lately, I've been at a bit of an impasse.
To give a little backstory, previously in high school, I had been in a three year relationship with a girl since my freshman year, and ended senior year with her cheating on me and in very traumatic fashion I found out not from her; but her mom. Obviously through that, I developed a lot of trust issues in relationships and other scenarios.
Its been about a year since that breakup, and I've had stints with other people and short term "talking" as preschoolers called it, but never a committed relationship since. I feel like I'm decently enjoying the single life, and I'm not sure whether I want to settle down for a little.
Since starting college, I've met a very pretty, nice girl which I have a decent amount of things in common with. We've been dating and showing alot of affection in public and around our friends. She is alot more inexpeirenced than me however, so I'm not sure how seriously she feels about this as well. I like her in that way, but I'm not super, super infatuated like I've been with other women in the past. I'm afraid if I choose to make it an official thing, I might end up hurting her.
My question I'm asking, do you think its a good idea to ask her to be an official couple? Am I just overthinking things, or should I really think about it before I make a decision about that.
Thank you all. | I like a girl but I'm scared I'll hurt her because of my past trust issues and possible commitment issues. |
t3_1iotku | tifu | TIFU Bricked an android phone - no really, bricked | So a friend of mine spends $650 on the new Google edition s4, knows I root and mess with android phones. So the first thing he does after having his phone delivered is messages me. I proceed to tell him to check xda on guides on how to root his new expensive phone etc. Long story short within an hour he has his phone rooted, has installed a custom rec and downloads a new Rom to flash. Only the newbie flashes his zip file and the phone does nothing when he chooses to reboot. No light for charging. No boot. No bootloop, just NOTHING. I ask him what file he flashed. Turns out it was a Verizon radio update file, one expensive brick! | friend buys GE S4, bricks it in an hour |
t3_4m9lx2 | relationships | Me [29 M] with my Ex-Girlfriend [29F] 2 years 1 Month, Cross-Roads in domestic residing | Hello Reddit!
My Ex Girlfriend and I of 2 years and 1 month recently broke up; I'm at a crossroads as to what to do about our financials and living arrangements. Currently we share a 2 bed room apartment in which I pay the majority of the rent ($757 a month), I also pay the car insurance ($227 a month), our cellphone bill ($260 a month) and cabel ($199 a month). We also have 2 cats and a Chincilla. She recently broke up with me after stating that she can't be with me because of my work schedule (48 on 72 off, with a 48 on and 48 off) I am a career DOD Firefighter|EMT. I also work a second job as a Paid EMT to supplement my income mainly. We had problems in the past, I lost interest for a while because of Depression stemming from PTSD from the Army. She begged me to get help and I finally did, but she no longer wants to be with me, citing she needs someone home every night. I am at a cross roads, I love her dearly but I still feel that if we are truly to go our separate ways, we need to move out of each others lives figurative and literally. She doesn't make much money, so that's a part of me that feels guilty and obligated, she says she still loves me, but I don't feel it anymore | At a cross roads of what to do financially and living arrangements! |
t3_3bh2bz | tifu | TIFU by thinking a coworker's boyfriend was there when she didn't want him there and warning her, then overhearing her complain about me | F*cken eh man. I never thought I'd post to this forum instead of read it and make fun of people. I deliver pizzas and a coworker was ranting about how her boyfriend broke up with her after an argument saying 'if you leave for work now it's done'... And she said some time after he drove to her house and waited.
So a few days later at work (we both deliver pizzas) I see him at the parking lot sitting in his car, and I think he's sad because his head is down and it looks like he's waiting for her...like an angry boyfriend. So I text her a warning. I get back from the delivery after no messages from her for like twenty minutes (she's at a delivery), she comes back from the delivery, and I hear her complaining to the gay guy about me and my weird text. I interrupt, and she explains how she was getting him food and he was like that because he was waiting for her and they are together.
Also she was all nice before that incident. We didn't talk as we did dishes, some fake polite stuff but yeah. I'm never talking to girls again especially girl coworkers I can't avoid. I thought I was an alpha male. But this drama, it's too much to deal with. I will never talk to girls again. Time to wash away this memory with snapple...not diet! | texted girl to warn her unwanted boyfriend, but turns out their together and I looked like an ass. |
t3_37xy36 | relationships | I [M23] feel like my girlfriend [F25] is pushing me away and i don't know why. | We have only been dating for 4 months but hanging out and sleeping together for about 7 or 8.
Lately things have seemed a tad different. We got to a stage where we were seeing each other 4 or 5 times a week and it was way to much for us. We decided to scale it back to once or twice a week and act like we are dating instead of a full on couple.
I am however getting mixed signals from her. Yesterday for example i didn't text her all day, mainly because lately she hasn't been responding to my texts properly (short answers or not responding) and i was also occupied. At about 5pm she texted me saying "not talking to me now?". To that i acted normal and we had a normal back and fourth text conversation, then i told her i missed her and wanted to see her soon and to that she didn't reply at all.
Previously to a text like that she would respond saying she misses me too and would plan to see me soon. I am a person that is a lot about communication, so when i first noticed her starting to act different I sat her down and we had a proper talk. We talked for about an hour about how slowing things down was a good idea but how I still want to slowly move forward with our relationship she agreed with me. I asked her if she still wanted to be with me and she said yes and then we had an amazing night together. Since that night the things i said above have happened.
I am just curious if this has happened with anyone else and how they made it through this situation and what to do or say? | Girl i am dating barely responds to my texts and has stopped planning to see me even though we just had an hour long talk and an amazing night together a week ago. (talked about our future together etc) I am just curious if this has happened with anyone else and how they made it through this situation and what to do or say? |
t3_1f7me1 | dating_advice | [20m] How to not be overeager? | So I met this girl online, and we messaged back and forth for a day or so. Things seemed to be going well, so i asked her for her number, which she gave to me.
We texted back and forth a couple days, and I found out she works really close to where I work. During our texting, I seemed to be driving most of the conversation (ie asking all the questions, etc)
Not sure what she's thinking about me at this point, I ask if she wants to meet up and grab some coffee or something, and just chat. She said ok and we set up a date.
So my question is this- I have dated two girls before, and gone on a single date with a third. I am a kind of person who is open and is genuinely interested in the other person. How can I make sure to not come across as creepy/over interested? | met girl, is meeting up with girl. How to not scare her away? |
t3_46ge7j | relationships | Me [26 M] with my GF [25 F], I know I have to break up with my GF... | So I have been dating this girl recently (since Jan.) but we've been hooking up since october. A little backstory here, I was reluctant to start and actual relationship because I had just gotten out of and was still recovering from a past relationship that obviously went south in a very bad way. That being said we spend all of our time together, free time, weeknights, weekends, like all the time. I really enjoy her as a person but I slowly am starting to realize that the level of commitment and how much she is into it and how into I am are two completely separate things. She keeps dropping hints that she wants to talk about us. Which basically translates into her wanting to know if I am as emotionally invested as she is. Which sadly in the romantic sense of the whole thing, I am nowhere near her commitment level. She is going away this weekend and wants to have "the convo" before she leaves. I think the shittiest part of this is that for the first time in my life I am starting to see the difference between a love interest, and someone who I would rather have just be a friend. This is gonna hurt/break her but I know in my heart of hearts that I need to come clean about my feelings for her sake as well as mine, and it just sucks because like I said this is the first relationship I want to preserve as a friendship but I doubt that it will end up that way. Thanks for reading, I'm glad this place exists. | Me and my GF are not on the same page romantically speaking, I'm more into the friendship than the relationship, and I have to end it for the sake of both of us. |
t3_oak3x | AskReddit | Reddit- What is the guiltiest fap you have ever had? [NSFW] | In other words, what Fap made you feel the guiltiest/awkwardest after wards?
I'll start, one time I was on vacation in California and I hadn't fapped in over 3 1/2 weeks. My mind was filled by all these weird desires. My hotel was on the 14th floor of the building and the rooms next to me were empty. So yes, I fapped on the balcony. About midway through I got this weird idea to finish through the railing and have it rain jizz on the ground below (don't ask why). So I did and it was a huge load. Little did I know that my room sat above a sidewalk. After finishing and cleaning up I got the munchies and decide to head down to the lobby to get a snack, and at the front desk there is a 20 something couple who were talking about how this bird to a massive dump on their heads and that they wanted to get the their room to clean up. I had the biggest "Oh fuck" moment of my life. I still feel bad about it to this day. | I unknowingly came on the heads of a 20 something year old couple from my hotel balcony. All because I was being stupid while fapping. |
t3_t8hfj | AskReddit | I have a practical ethics question, and I need Reddit's help | Setup: My school has a parking garage and a grocery store across the street with a parking lot which is never full (and is ironically more convenient to park in). The school ran out of spaces (which were $500 for the year), but now that seniors have graduated, there are many extras, though people are not supposed to park in other student's spaces. The grocery store parking lot can be used for student parking, if a student buys a $40 month parking pass, the money for which goes to a charity. I bought a pass the previous two months.
Question: Compare the relative morality of these two choices:
1. Use the spot of a senior that doesn't need it any more.
2. Use a previous month's pass to create a fake pass for this month.
In neither solution does another person's space get taken from them, nor is any money exchanged. | Is faking a parking pass immoral if the only thing that it changes is one person's parking convenience? |
t3_3vdna1 | tifu | TIFU by stealing my winter formal date's phone and telling someone else they liked them | So I was hanging out with my winter formal date (we'll call her jan), not doing much. At one point she left for a while and her phone was still sitting there, so being a bored and goofy guy, I text her mom "Hi it's (my name)! how was your day?" and also texted our mutual close friend (lets call him john) "I think I like you."
I thought to myself "this should be some good harmless fun" as I deleted the text and though of how long I should wait before telling him.
Jan comes back and we keep hanging out and I notice her texting with a concerned look on her face. "better clue Jon in so nothing bad happens" I think to myself. I text him "hey, I sent the text from Jan then deleted it. it was just a joke, I'm sorry, don't tell her" to which he responded "sorry buddy, im telling her.
So apparently i opened a hell of a can of worms, and now both my date/ prospective girlfriend and one of my best friends are pissed at me because i pulled a stupid prank | i texted my guy friend from my gal friends phone saying she liked him as a benevolent joke and now they hate me. |
t3_zpf86 | Pets | Dog person thinking of adopting a cat. | I'm a total dog person, I love playing with them, sitting with them, you name it. I had dogs growing up and I'm finally in a place in my life where I think a pet is a good idea. The problem is I live in a small apartment in an urban-ish area. There are parks, but not really close by. Also, I do come home every day but it's not a regular schedule. Anyway, instead of a dog I am considering a cat. I've never really thought about adopting a cat, but I really want a pet in my life and my former roommate had a cat that I helped look after and I did develop a fondness for him.
Even though I have an affinity for dogs I know I'm also just an Animal Person. Two and half years ago I found a white mouse in the loading dock at work, since I'm a sucker I took her home, she gave birth to a litter and I kept her and the females (I had to take the males to the animal shelter for obvious reasons). I've spent more energy and money on mice than I ever thought possible, and when I lived with my parents I was my dogs primary care giver, I fed him, house trained him, took him to the vet (many times paying for it myself) so I've got what it takes.
/r/pets what are your thoughts? Does anyone share my history with dogs to became a cat owner? Was it a good idea or are there things I should know?
Also I hope this is in the right spot, not really a Reddit novice, but I'm still kind of new. | Dog guy is thinking of adopting a cat. Thoughts? |
t3_2a2yfx | relationships | My [29 M] short-term temporary roommate [31F] is pooping on my kitchen spoon. | To first clarify, I have 2 other roommates [28M] & [33M]. A couple weeks ago, all 3 of us agreed to allow [33M]'s friend [31F](not GF) stay with us while he went on vacation to Italy. Apparently [31F] is having some problems with her living situation so we agreed to let her stay with us until either he gets back from vacation or she finds a new place.
She seems to be a very nice, pretty girl and is respectful for the most part.
She moved into our house last Friday and all seemed ok except she seemed to be a bit depressed. I didn't think anything of it because she is going through a lot with her previous living situation and because she is not from the U.S. and is still trying to get her work Visa.
In any case, this morning my other roommate [28M] discovered in the top of the bathroom garbage there was one of our kitchen metal spoons in there with what looked like peanut butter on it. To his disbelief he looked into it a little further and discovered it was actually poop! We have no idea what to make of this. Why she would do this, or if she did do this why she wouldn't at least try to hide it better like throw the garbage out!
Now, we have no idea what to do. She is a very sweet girl and kind of don't want to embarrass her or even know how to approach her about this.
She is only staying with us for another 7 days. We talked to our other roommate who is currently in Italy and he said he wanted to kick her out, but that is a lot easier for him since we are the ones who have to see her face to face. | Found a shit covered spoon in my bathroom garbage. I believe it's from my temporary roommate who moves out in a week. Not sure if/how to confront her. |
t3_265yf7 | relationships | Is it too much for my girlfriend[34 F] to want to hang out with me[33 M] and my friends sometimes? | I have a smaller group of friends than she does and I tend to have a couple of regular handouts with them every week. Mondays I go out with a group (usually two couples) to a bar and do trivia. Friday nights are usually spent at a friend's (a different couple) playing board games. In our 2.5 years of dating, she's come to trivia twice and hung out with my 'game friends' maybe six times.
In the past six months or so I've stopped inviting her to trivia, after two years I finally get the clue (my final invite included a standing invitation). Recently when a friend of hers brought up trivia she says that she doesn't dislike it, just doesn't want to go every week.
The fact that she doesn't like playing board games at all (I really enjoy them) and the introverted nature of my game friends keep her away from the Friday night events.
We've talked about her trying harder, but I don't feel like I should have to nag her in order for me to make an appearance (not to mention that if she doesn't want to be there in the first place, I will sense it and I'll be uncomfortable).
Although I am much more introverted than she is, I feel that I participate with her friends far more than she participates with mine. I have only been in a couple of long-term relationships (and this is her most serious one by far), so I might be missing something. I know it is important for people in a relationship to have their own hobbies, friends and alone time, but something keeps nagging at me that this isn't quite right. Am I off base? | I hang out with my girlfriend and her friends, but she doesn't hang out with mine. What up? |
t3_4wauhm | relationships | Me [18m] unsure how to respond to my friends [18m] goodbye. | Before you think I'm nuts, my friend is going overseas to a dangerous part of the world for two weeks. Last night we were texting eachother and at the end of it I, not wanting him to not know how I feel should something happen to him, told him I really appreciate him as a friend. He told me something similar, and then threw in a couple Bible verses that basically said we should always love our friends, and that we should hold them close. Now, if I'm not mistaken, he was trying to tell me he loves me (not in a gay way or anything, but in the context of the verses it was a brotherly thing). How do I respond to this? I've never had a friend as good as this before, and I totally feel the same way but I have zero clue on how to respond.
He leaves in about 24 hours, so help! | Just read it it's not that long. |
t3_1p3gqh | relationships | Me [17 M] with my 17 [F] and other 17 [F], two months, caught between two girls | A little backstory: I was a relatively fat kid not too long ago (17 M). I worked out, ate right, and lost about 40 pounds. This made me feel awesome and helped my confidence skyrocket (I never had a girlfriend before/kiss).
About 10 pounds into my weight loss I asked this girl, lets call her Grace, out who I had a massive crush on. Im talking borderline obsession.
She rejected me and we didn't talk for a few months until school started up again. She saw my new look and personality and instantly started flirting/texting me again. I didn't really want any part of it, even though I still had feelings for her.
Fast forward a few weeks.
I met this girl, lets call her Sarah, who is seriously amazing, I mean, I cant imagine a better fit for myself. Sarah and I have gotten quite close over the last few weeks or so, and I was planning on asking her out. Of course, as I was talking to Sarah about this dance we were going to, Grace texts me saying that she messed up when she didn't say yes to me months earlier.
I of course freak out, ask Sarah for her advice, she says go for it, I do, and now I have a date.
Yaaay, a lonely teenager may finally have a relationship. But, now I am all confused because I had these developing feelings for Sarah, and now I'm about to go on a date with Grace.
When I told Sarah about Grace and me, she said congratulations and stopped texting me relatively soon after that. I don't know if I've hurt her or if I've made her jealous.
Im a little confused at the moment. If you have any support or help it would be greatly appreciated. | Hot girl rejects me, I get skinny and get a new [f]riend, hot girl wants me back, I say yes, am confused/did I fuck up? |
t3_16yref | dogs | Help | I know the title is vague but I really need help. Because of an irresponsible breeder I have a puppy that is about five weeks old. Now I did my homework before even shopping for a puppy but all my research was based on when I receive the puppy at the normal age..about 8 weeks, I'm told. I was told this guy was ready to go but when family came to see him after he was safely home they became concerned that he seemed a little per mature for a eigh week puppy. I called the breeder and finally got a hold of her. I was tod he was born dec 13 and so I suggested that he needs to be with his mother a while longer. Claims she already moved away...sales are final type f bs. So here I am.
Things that I have done...
Feed him perina puppy chow..he kept it down
Put water on my finger and showed him the water bowl he seems to get it
He has some chew toys he playing with
Found fleas on him and gave him a warm bath with a little dish soap from the neck down and used a comb and tweezers and nabbed all the ones I saw about 4 and removed eggs
He looks to be paper trained on peeing but is missing the spot on poop..oh we'll I shall work on that
Things I'm concerned about
I'm scared he is missing essential mother time and her nutrients
Shots etc what can it do to best protect him for now. I think he has to be a little older for his initial shots.z
We have a cat she is two years old..always been inside. She will be restricted to the bathroom when he is about exploring being a pup and they will switch roles for a week or so to get used to scents. Every once in a while he puts his head down and uses a low tone whine I would describe it then falls asleep...edit. Just did it in his sleep
I know this is long and not sure how to | it but really If your interested in helping you would read the whole thing.. |
t3_3goqnl | relationship_advice | I (26/m) have a small discomfort with gf's (24/f) past | I'd really like help getting over this but it's such a odd topic to talk about in general.
I'm a very "want to know" type of guy so I ask a lot of questions in maybe discrete ways about my lovers past. I might make a reference or joke about it, but honestly I really want to know. The basics like how many people you have slept with, to how many people have you dated can really get messy and weird. But again, curiosity kills me and it's usually not as bad as I'm imagining.
So, I know her very small number of people she's been with but I recently found out they were mostly RIGHT before me. Uncomfortable, but I guess I get coming out of your shell after finally starting to become sexually active. But then I find that one of those times was with a black guy... This surprises me, why am I so caught up on that? I feel like it's usually a preference thing and I'm not black, I just can't imagine her being attracted to a black guy I guess... But why does it make me feel a bit unattracted to her because of it?
Well of course I ask more questions and I find that while not being promiscuous as far as sex, has made out with at least 50 guys.... I give my best poker face, but she could tell I was taken back by it. I mean, to me that sounds like a lot. I find kissing someone to be a very personal thing.
So reddit, give me some wisdom on dealing with what goes on in my head. Why do I feel like this? And how can I over come it? Or am I a lost cause? | I'm slightly unattracted to my girlfriend because of her past. |
t3_53ht5f | relationships | Me [24M] with my GF [22F] of 3 years, got a small part in an upcoming TV show. I'm totally not cool with it because because of the nudity and simulated sex . | So I've been seeing this girl for 3 years now. She does part time acting , and has mostly been doing small roles in theater.
Recently she got a very small role in a TV show.
Her role mainly involves her having simulated sex with the main character before she's been killed off.
Now, I know this is part of the package of dating someone who wants to be an actor. But to be honest, I never thought she'll land a role in a TV show like that and never bother about such stuff.
I'm totally not comfortable the idea of her being completely naked (it's a full frontal nudity) , having pretend sex with another guy and making out with another man.
Another reason that is bothering me is that now all my friends and family will see her this scene and I'm just not happy with everyone seeing her naked and making out with someone else.
Now she's totally excited about appearing on the small screen and so far I've not raised this issue. I've been supportive. At the same time I can't tell her to not do this role because of my personal jealousy issues.
On the other hadn, I've been having sleepless nights because of this issue and I'm afraid this might cause long term issues to this relationships.
I'm not sure what to do. | GF got a small scene in a TV show, have to be completly naked and pretend sex, I'm unhappy with it, worried about my friends and family seeing her like that. Confused. |
t3_1356m0 | self | A question about animal ethics | So this question is spurred by [this] post I saw on /r/MorbidReality recently.
So it seems that people are generally disgusted by animals being in pain. However, isn't killing an animal the worst thing you can do to it? From the way the justice system is set up in most countries, usually killing someone is seen as the worst thing one can do. So how do all these people justify killing animals for consumption, but still view killing them in a certain way as wrong? I can understand arguments that it is an inhumane way to kill them i.e. cruel and unusual punishment, but it seems that killing them is still the ultimate injustice. Even beyond this extreme kind of animal torture, I see people making similar arguments about keeping animals in cages. Does what we do to them matter, if ultimately their purpose is to die for our pleasure? This argument can also be extended to bestiality etc.
I've read [The Animal Liberation Movement] (pdf) by Peter Singer which I highly recommend, and even if one does not agree with it, the logic contained in the argument makes sense. It just seems that you can either decide that animals do indeed have interests that we should listen to, which would entail not torturing or killing them, or we can just say animals do not have interests, in which case we should be able to do whatever we wish to them. I'm not trying to argue whether people should be vegetarians or not, just wondering how this middle ground is justifiable. | Basically my question is, how do people justify eating animals while still not condoning torturing them? |
t3_4yyzlo | relationship_advice | [29/m] looking to get back together with ex [24/f] who also wants to. Advice needed for dealing with friend's lack of support. | We dated for two years, loved together, broke up and I moved out. I started dating someone else and have been for about 3 months until a couple of weeks back. My ex wants us to try again and I want that too.
My friends m, since we broke up, full out disclosed weird shit and they obviously disliked her. Whatever. But with a few months to herself and receiving some help and being put on medals for her depression she really seems like she is in the best place. How can I help my friends to give her another shot? | my friends don't like me ex, she seems much better and I want them to give her another shot. Advice? |
t3_tyw4j | AskReddit | Reddit, do you have any interesting genealogical family stories? | My mom told me this story about my great-great-grandfather (I think his name was Ernest) after she started studying our family history. Note: There may or may not be some added flair, as I haven't heard this story in a couple years, and my mom has passed on.
Ernest lived on a big plot of farm land in South-western New York (Allegany State Park for those of you who know the area) and his son, Henry, lived on the land with his family as well. This particular story takes place after Ernest's wife has passed away, and on his eightieth birthday. I'm sure he had cake and dinner and festivities with his son and what not, but Ernie was ready to go to bed by night time. Unfortunately, great-great-grandpa Ernie woke up to a house fire. He ran to his son's house to get his help and get someone to get the horse-and-wagon fire department. As he was running, he must have been exasperated-- an eighty-year-old and all, but he ran a mile in the dark to Henry's house anyway. He knocked on the door and began to feel heart palpitations and chest pains. No one was answering the door. Ernest knocked harder on the door. No answer. No one answered the door until morning, after Ernest's house had burned down and after he had suffered a heart attack and passed away. | My great-great-grandfather was the first bad luck Brian. |
t3_53jvxb | relationships | My (25F) boyfriend (25M) hurt his back, won't see a doctor, and is taking it out on me. | My boyfriend is a active guy. Bike riding, skate boarding, motorcycle riding, has a job with lots of manual labor involved etc.
A couple weeks ago he started complaining about his back hurting. It's gotten to the point now that just sitting in bed or turning his head makes him cry out in agony and tense up. He can barely move! He's obviously uncomfortable and in pain, which in turn is making him extremely irritable. This is a funny, loving, affectionate guy --- who now doesn't want to be touched, doesn't want to talk, and is acting pissy about everything. He never snaps at me but now I can't even so much as breathe loudly without getting a death glare.
I've been gently encouraging him to see a doctor or a physical therapist but he keeps refusing, stating he's had accidents before and he just needs time to "heal", it's just a pulled muscle, etc. And as far as I know he has no fear of doctors/good health insurance, since I thought maybe something like that was holding him back from getting checked out.
It came to a head today when out of frustration I told him to stop complaining to me if he was going to keep refusing to get help, because it's distressing to me. That I feel helpless watching him shuffle around like he's 100 years old instead of 25. Something is obviously wrong and he needs to see a doctor.
He got really upset by that, said I was being cold, that he always listens to my life complaints and they don't bother him, etc. I ended up apologizing, but Reddit, how I can make this stubborn guy see the light? Can I get some comments backing me up that I can show him, that this is something he needs to deal with and not ignore? He's been in pain for weeks, he's not getting better, and it's making him not act like himself. But trying to tell him that just makes him shut down the conversation. | BF hurt his back, has turned into a grumpy ass and won't see a doctor. How do I encourage him to take this seriously and not pretend it will go away when it's been weeks of him in pain? |
t3_2trfdl | relationships | How do I break through the trust barrier with my girlfriend who I think has deep seeded trust issues | I'm a 23 year old male, she's 25 and has had a fair few more romantic partners than me (I've had a half dozen or so) as well as a not so desirable upbringing I suppose (parents falling out, etc) and has never trusted a guy. I have so many qualities that I'm certain the others didn't so I am absolutely not concerned about who she's been with before
I'm the most trustworthy bloke out there (no joke) and we are an unbelievable match but I would love to hear some advice on how I can win her over as I think that it is going to be a challenge.
Without it I'm sure the relationship is doomed and the thought of that is killing me :-/. We've been together for a month but I'm close to head over heels for this woman. | I need to win my girlfriends trust but it's going to be a long hard road, any advice would be appreciated |
t3_i4351 | loseit | Trying to get SO interesting in exercising with me for health, fun, motivation, and companionship, but she just won't have it. Any suggestions? | A gym membership is just right out. We went riding bikes a few times which she enjoyed, but that's really more of a pleasant thing to do in the afternoon, nothing you're really going to work up a sweat with, you know?
She had a stationary bike and an elliptical machine before I met her, but got rid of them both (D'oh!) before I met her, because she said she 'didn't like they made the floor squeek.' I got P90X, which she said she would try, but after previewing the routines, she changed her mind, saying she would feel silly. She agreed to try Insanity, numerous times, and even did do one single workout, but that was it. I almost got her to jog with me today, but she backed out at the last minute. The best I've been able to do is get her to ride my bike along side me while I jog.
I'd really like for her to want to join in, if only for the reason that it's always more fun (and easier) if you have a partner who can help motivate you when you're not feeling like getting a workout it. I'm trying to not be pushy about it and I would hope she'd come around on her own, but I'm not sure if that's going to work out in the end. Does anyone have any success stories in motivating their SO to join them in exercising? How'd you do it? | Girlfriend keeps promising to work out with me, but keeps baking out. What do, r/loseit? |
t3_3b4xiy | relationships | I [18 M] am being driven insane by my sister [15 F] becuase of her disregard for others exsistance. | I live with my mother. My sister comes to visit under a court order. When she is here, she is practically unbearable.
She spends her time playing Xbox, screaming profanity, and leavening garbage around. When she does shut up, she is sleeping. But she leaves the TV, Console, and Stereo on to waste energy. Mind that I help pay the electricity bill. Even is a separate room with the door closed, I can still hear her.
I'm an introvert and need time alone in peace and quiet to gather myself. But it's difficult to rest with her going on when I'm sleeping, fulfilling my PC Hobbie, and trying to go to work.
Telling her to shut up directly doesn't work. My mother would be willing to help, but she is on the fence right now. It would take some convincing to get her to act. Any suggestions? | I live with mom. Sister visits under court order. She is a messy, loud person. I have a problem with that. |
t3_3xaahc | tifu | TIFU by calling my boss is fat | TIFU AT WORK
I work in a grocery store and I was serving my boss. She said that she was in a hurry because she seen a delivery truck arriving. Incase your wondering she wanted to get into her car before the truck blocked the exit. (the car park is tiny)
She was about to leave but remembered that she needed batteries. She was digging through her bag very quickly to get her money. Then I made a comment "I never seen you move so quickly" she let out a loud gasp and paid me before leaving.
I had no idea what offended her until I explained my story to a co worker and they made it clear.
I'm in tomorrow and I'm not looking forward to it. | my boss was in a hurry and was digging for money in her bag, I said that I haven't seen her move so fast and she got offended. |
t3_gplp7 | AskReddit | Why are Red Delicious and Granny Smith the most popular apples even though they suck? | I tried doing research but I couldn't find very much. Does anyone know the economic reason?
This is what I found:
Summary: When farms began merging and selling for a national market, in the early 1900's, they decreased the variety to improve branding and consistency. They cared purely for beauty on sweetness. On beauty, they wanted apples that consistently looked perfectly polished, unblemished, round, and shiny. On sweetness, they wanted apples that compared to white sugar and processed sweets rather than other fruits. And through heavy branding and marketing, that left Red and Golden delicious at the top of the pack.
There's something that's always bothered me whenever I go to a reception with fruit. They always only have Red Delicious and Granny Smith Apples. They are among the worst apples I've had. Red Delicious are dry, grainy and not tasty. Granny Smith are overly tart. The huge range that lie in between are all so much better. Rome, Macintosh, Pink Lady, Fuji - now those are tasty apples. I talked to a few people who eat apples and found out they wondered the same thing. And people who didn't eat apples said they didn't like the taste, probably because they only tried Red Delicious and Granny Smith.
Full research here:
I would love an answer to this. It's bugged me for years. | Red Delicious and Granny Smith suck. They were branded and sold nationally early on because they were shiny and looked perfect. Did they stick or was there some better economic reason? |
t3_mjgsh | AskReddit | Birthday plans for Sister who recently became almost completely blind? | So here's the situation.
My sister is Turning 22 on tuesday and for the past year she has been battleing [Diabetic retinopathy]
She Lost most of her eyesight due to bleeds last Sunday and currently has little to no vision in both eyes, She can make out basic shapes and colors but it is all very blurry.
My parents are not doing a very good job of consoling her or making things better for her So I'm reaching out here to see if anyone has had a situation that may be similar and find out what I can do to help her keep her spirits up and get through the hard transition.
I've already gotten her all the harry potter audio books and places them on my old First gen nano so that she can use the click wheel to easily pause and start.I've also got a game of thrones lined up for when she finishes those, and set her I-phone up so that she can use it to text and make calls. But (and i know to a point this should be expected) she's been spending most of her time in the dark in her room by herself.
Any advice or suggestions will be appreciated. | Sister just went blind last week and turns 22 on Tuesday what can i do to make her life a little brighter |
t3_4t6mvy | relationships | Had (20m) a date that went well but she (19F) just stopped responding afterwards ? | We went on a tinder date that I felt was pretty good, it lasted around 4 hours (not sure what that means or how well it bodes ?). There was barely any silence as we just talked for most of it.
I messaged her afterwards because I have a problem where whenever I try to be genuine I just sound awkward and sarcastic to let her know that I did actually have a good time and wanted to see her again.
She messaged back saying that she had a great time too and would love to go out again and after 1 or 2 more messages theres been radio silence. This has gone on for just over a week now but I did message her 3/4 days ago to see if she wanted to go out but never got a response.
Do I message her again or just chalk this one up as a loss ? | Went on a good tinder date, she said she wanted to go on another but is now radio silent, whats the course of action for this ? |
t3_372rif | tifu | TIFU by trusting my instincts while hungover | Last night I went out drinking with some friends. Woke up today, hungover and ready to tackle the day's first obstacle, the dreaded post-drinking shit. It didn't take long for me to realize that this bad-boy might not flush, and I had no plunger even close to available. I winged it, flushed, and prayed. But I did not have time to pray for long, as the water-level in the bowl increased, alarmlingly fast. My train of thought was severily disturbed by last night's adventure, but I managed to instinctively shoot my hand down the bowl to try and remove the devil inside. A mix of joy and the want to puke filled me as I watched the bowl empty itself. In hindsight, I tell myself that I would have flooded the floor had it not been for my quick instincts. I then promptly ran into the shower to scrub the sin away. | ran my hand down a poop-chute and had regrets for once |
t3_2rpj15 | relationships | My boyfriend (29/M) is pissed because I (20/F) asked him not to text an ex around me after he lied about seeing her. | We've been together for about a year and a half. Several months ago, he made plans behind my back to see his ex. I could tell he was hiding something from me and I asked him about the girl I'd seen him texting a lot (and quickly exiting the conversation if I was nearby). He said she was just a friend, I asked if she was an ex and he said yes. He said they'd been talking because she was in town. I asked if he had plans to hang out with her, he said no.
I could tell he wasn't being entirely truthful, and I had to know for sure. So I checked his texts. Turns out he had tried to get her to meet up with him and made it as far as setting a time and place but she couldn't make it.
We dealt with that, he said he knew it was wrong, etc. He said he was going to continue his friendship with her but not see her. Fine with me, I just don't want to know about it.
Saw him texting her today, I asked him if he could not talk to her when he's sitting right next to me, because it brings up the old feelings. He has plenty of other chances to talk to her, I just don't want to know about it. He gets pissed and has been ignoring me the entire night. He refuses to talk to me, and keeps telling me to leave him alone and calling me immature.
I feel like it's fair of me to ask him not to talk to her when I'm around, after lying to me and going behind my back to make plans with her. I don't understand why he's making a huge deal about this. I just want to get some outside opinions on this, I don't know if I'm being crazy or he's overreacting. | I asked my boyfriend not to text his ex around me after he lied about seeing her, now he's pissed and won't talk to me. Is this fair? |
t3_1w7kpu | relationships | Me [17 F] with my Boyfriend [17M] of 3 years - My out of control anger? | We've been dating for 3 years but the past year and bit, we've been long distance, as in other side of the world distance so we only see each other once a year really. He's always working to earn money to see me and I'm in school so I've more time and am more flexible than he is. I've brought it up many times that I feel we're drifting apart because he just doesnt make as much effort to talk because he's always tired and busy. Due to the time difference, it's night here when it's morning there etc. We fight very..very regularly, almost every day. I just feel like things have changed and it's hard to deal with.
For the past maybe 6 months, I have these sort of ''breakdown'' type thing where we'll be communicating about a problem and I completely freak out and am just bawling crying and full of rage. I throw things, hit things, and my mindframe is very much like 'i would do something durastic as to hurt myself just for him to understand how i feel'. It sounds pathetic but it doesnt even feel like me, it goes on for an hour or more and it affects my whole day after where I do nothing but cry because it's like I don't recognize myself. I'm not like that. It just happens and I can't control it no matter how hard I try. I throw myself in the floor, hit my head, scream, shout, hit my head off things or jump up and down just in frustration. He always says I'm just being overly emotional and gets pissed off and just frustrated as well. It's like I can't communicate properly.
I just don't know what to do. It's come to a point where it affects not just that hour or 2, but hours after. It happens maybe every week or so, maybe every 2 weeks. I don't know what's wrong. | Uncontrollable anger because of communication. |
t3_34x25o | relationship_advice | I'm [23/m] and am in love with my fuck buddy turned best friend [22/f]. Anyone been in a similar situation? | So I'm not sure how common this is, but I could use some advice. I met a girl over a year ago through mutual friends and we quickly became physical with each other. At the time, neither of us was looking for anything serious and we both were open about seeing other people. We were seeing each other for a few months before things died down and she decided to focus on one guy.
A month or so later we reacquainted and ended up hooking up that night. While we never reestablished the physical relationship we had before, we ended up becoming very close friends over the next few months. We would hook up occasionally but never consistently like before.
Eventually I began having feelings for this girl that I didn't have before, and brought up the idea of dating. At first it seemed a strong possibility but she ended up deciding that wasn't how she felt, and we decided to stay friends.
As time went on we got even closer to the point where I can confidently say she is my best friend. We both say "I love you," we sleep over with each other sometimes, cuddle, even share the occasional kiss, although it usually doesn't go beyond that.
She doesn't want to be romantically involved. And I think I do.
I'm not exactly sure what to do. I love how close we are but that's also the reason I want more with her. She recently started seeing someone and I can't help but wish it was me she wanted. Any ideas on what to do? If I could I'd shut off the romantic feelings so we could just stay best friends, but I don't know how to do that or if its even possible. Love to hear your thoughts or similar stories! Thanks for reading. | I've fallen for my former fuck buddy turned best friend, and she doesn't feel the same. What do I do? |
t3_2fdfg9 | AskReddit | How do you trick or makes kids eat food they don't like? | My parents are in an emergency and my mom has been hospitalized in another state leaving me with my little brother who is very difficult to feed. Usually, if he doesn't like something, he will purposefully take a long time to eat it, play with it until it is inedible, or he will cry. I read online that maybe I can hide nutritious food it in the foods he likes but he can always tell when I try. Beating and punishing him is not an option and he just breaks down emotionally if I raise my voice. Help! Has anyone had the same issue? I wanted input quickly so I put it on reddit. I don't want my mom to worry about him while she's trying to recover. | Only person caring for little brother and he won't eat food necessary to survival. Would be very very grateful for suggestions that worked with other difficult children. |
t3_4myl1e | personalfinance | I think my identity has been stolen. How can I know for sure? | I read the identity theft wiki and I learned a lot about what I should do- but I don't know for sure that anything fraudulent has taken place.
**Back story:** I got a call from my bank (so they said) last week saying my card information and PIN had been taken somewhere I had swiped it. The caller provided me with information about myself and my account. They said that because of this breach, they'd have to issue me a new card and PIN. My call was transferred to another person to verify my address and other demographic info. All the information they had was correct.
Since then, I have gotten alerts from Mint, not even my actual bank, regarding finance charges that don't make sense- particularly surcharges for using my card internationally.
This morning, I was feeling unsettled about the whole thing so I searched the number that called me. It doesn't appear to have any connections with my bank. | 1. is there a way to tell if my identity has been stolen? |
t3_1tkko6 | relationships | Controlling SO practically stalks me. Please help!! | My SO(30/m) and I(24/f) have been together for almost a year and a half. At first things were wonderful like they always are in a new relationship, but as time has gone by he has become more and more controlling. He doesn't like when I want to go do things with friends or family regardless of their sex and doesn't even like me having a friendly relationship with my son's father. As a direct result of Hus controlling suspicions I have alienated two of my good friends.
We both happen to be employed at the same bar where I cook and bartend and he does all the VIP and band management. When I have to work and he doesn't he insists on coming with me forcing me to find last minute arrangements for my child. If there is an issue within our relationship he refuses to wait until we get home and picks fights at work.
Whenever I try to talk to him about any of this it starts a fight. I love him and would love to have a life with him but our life goals don't match up and I honestly don't know if I can deal with how controlling he is. I'm at a loss for what to do and would love any and all feedback. I know the truth hurts sometimes but it's time for me to hear it. | My SO is controlling and confrontational to the point of being a live in stalker. I love him but need to do what's best for my son and I. Please help. |
t3_3syt3x | relationships | My [18 F] Girlfriend wants me [18 M] to cut off contact with a friend | Hello, I am with my girlfriend for one month now. We are in a long distance relationship.
Since i told her about a female friend with whom i had phone sex (before i got to know my girlfriend) she wants me to cut off all contact with that friend. I don't know that friend in person (only texting/calling) by the way. I never felt something romantically towards this friend and neither did she. I want to keep her as a friend though. I tried to express this to my gf many times. I really want to show her that she can trust me. There are no problems with me having other female friends, it's just this one.
While I can totally understand that she has problems with this, I ask myself if there is a way to not lose one of them.
I appreciate any advice. If someone has had similar experiences, I would really like to hear about them too! | My gf wants me to cut off contact with a female friend. Is there a way to get her to at least accept me having this friend? |
t3_2m8t3l | relationships | Is my [16] mom [late 40s F] abusive or does she have actual problems? | So since I'm still in high school, my mom picks me up after school. The twenty minute ride from school to home is always the worst part of the day. Since it's in the afternoon, she is in a really pissed off mood and she takes out all her rage on me. Today, she read some articles on the internet about high school students supporting nazism or whatever and decided that I was a nazi member as well. It was so out of the blue and unexpected. I have never mentioned nazism and I would never support such a thing. She then went full ballistic mode mode at me and started screaming non stop. I foolishly talked back at her and she told me to go die. I pointed out that I was simply defending myself and she called me a selfish cunt who disrespects his mother. Logistically, it's not possible for me to walk or take a bus to school so I'm stuck with her for now.
Now, the thing I hate is that this isn't just a one time thing. This happens almost on a daily basis and I have no idea what triggers it. Sometimes she may be mad at my dad or my sister and she'll take it out on me. Other times, someone might cut her off and she'll scream at me. It's so random. I know that she has anger issues but I'm also quite scared by how quickly
her personality changes. She frequently changes from smiling to screaming and I don't know how I can prevent her from blowing up so often. I've suggested that she get treatment and she laughs at my face. My dad is usually away from home because he's working and my sister is studying abroad. So, I get 99% of all her anger. She does scream at my dad and my sister as well though. Is there any realistic way that I can prevent her from exploding so often? Also, do you think she has actual mental problems? | My mom has an unpredictable temper and I don't know how to avoid it. |
t3_zzakv | relationships | How often should I [F20] expect to talk to my SO [M22]? | So I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and when I was dating my boyfriend, it caused me to be incredibly clingy. I got paranoid and anxious that if he didn't spend enough time with me, his feelings for me would lessen or something, I dunno. Anxiety is weird. Anyway, I was incredibly dependent on him. I wanted to be with him all the time and text him all the time. I was the embodiment of the OAG.
We dated for about 6 months (both deeply in love with each other, neither of us denies that even after the break-up), and then broke up over the anxiety issues. I start treatment, we start to talk about getting back together. So far it's been a month since the break-up and about two weeks since we've been on good enough terms to talk and hang out. But he says the source of our break-up relied on a few key issues, one of which was my over-attachment to him. He said I have to show him that I can be independent and not so clingy. I asked him to give me some boundaries so I would know what was too clingy - how often should I expect to see him? How often can I text him before it gets annoying? That type of thing. I feel like I still have a childish view of relationships (text all day no matter what type thing) and I'm not sure how adult relationships work in this aspect.
So I'm wondering if anyone here has some advice. I don't want to scare him away this time by being too clingy, and I can already tell I'm falling back into my old ways (texted him twice yesterday after not getting a response). I'm just looking for some advice on how much is too much, basically.
If I don't talk to him at all, he talks to me maybe every other day. Is that a decent amount of talking for people when they're trying to get back together? | Not sure how often I should expect to text or talk to my SO. |
t3_49j6sa | tifu | TIFU by being a gentleman | Yesterday (which was a very long long day for both my girlfriend and I) my girlfriend waited for me to finish work. The time was now 12:30am and we headed out the doors into the cold night. I remember on our walk together earlier in the day that she was cold and now that it was dark must be even more cold. So I decided the only gentlemanly thing to do was to remove my jacket, throw it around her, and suffer the short walk in the cold.
No sooner had my jacket hit her shoulders it manged to catch the back of her silver Tiffany Enchant heart earrings, which were a gift, and her favorite. Now you would think if we stop in our tracks and look down there it should be. But it wasn't. In fact an hour of searching, the help of multiple strangers and a police officer no earring was to be found. I even went back this morning in the daylight to retrace the area. Alas, nothing.
So instead of bestowing warmth and affection I created an elongated period of freezing cold, stress inducing, awkwardly quiet, street side scavenging because I thought my girlfriend would be cold enough to warrant my jacket on a 5 minute walk. My actions cost her the set of earrings, an additional hour before getting home after a very long day, and to top it all off her dog is being put down today. I certainly put the icing on the shit cake.
So, anyone have a single Tiffany Enchant earring? I'm in the market. | Giving a girl your jacket will only make her colder, both physically and emotionally. |
t3_2xu348 | relationships | Me [32 /F] suddenly fe attracted to [37 /M] met by accident - need advice | I met him by accident needing a service his company offered. At first I just appreciated his skills but the more we met, the more we started to flirt. He is not too direct but signals are strong... that would be unprofessional anyway.
Next week our contract ends and we will meet for the last time. The more it comes to an end, the more I go crazy. I would absolutely love to see him again, but I have no idea how to do this.
The meeting will be between us two. Another person comes just to sign some papers and then we wrap up and that's that.
Please give me some advice. this is not my forte | Met a guy and don't know how to put flirting on a next level (first date or so). |
t3_3e1iw6 | relationships | I (20M) think I indirectly damaged my relationship with girlfriend (19F) | I've been with my girlfriend for almost 9 months now. We both believe we are the one for each other and love each other very much. I wouldn't trade anything for her. However, I think I unwillingly damaged our relationship. One month prior to meeting her, I had sex with another friend of mine. I lost my virginity to this girl who was just a friend to me. Then about a month later I met my girlfriend and we are happy as can be now. I never told her that I had sex with that girl because I was too scared of her reaction and also the fact that my girlfriend knows her and is friendly with her. I know I didn't technically do wrong but I just feel like keeping it from her is wrong. But at the same time I feel like I shouldn't tell her. I really need some advice because I don't want to damage what I worked so hard building up. | Kept a secret from my girlfriend but I don't feel it is my obligation to tell her. Should I tell her or no? |
t3_rkqbj | AskReddit | Scumbag boss? | Hi Reddit!
I am 18 and have recently been looking for employment. A friend of mine helped me get a job where I am currently undergoing a trial. It is a waiting job. So far I have had 3 shifts, and the first two went quite well. However on this shift, as I was finishing up, another employee asked me if I had written down my time, as the employer has allegedly previously been known to shaft employees by paying them less than the hours worked. When I went to ask where I could write my times down, the owner said it was fine and he knew when I left. However, upon my insistance he scrawled it on a piece of paper (the kind easily lost).
I feel a little uncomfortable with this, and am considering asking him for an employee number, etc. "just to make things simpler". He has also not yet requested my tax-file number which is required by employers in australia.
Does anyone have any advice from their own experiences in the restaurant industry, or with scumbag bosses? | might have a scumbag boss who will try to shirk paying me the full amount he owes. |
t3_14s1vs | AskReddit | [Scared shitless] STDs: Care to share facts/anecdotes about being asymptomatic for months and getting tested positive? | Backstory: Female here. Got ridiculously drunk 4 months ago and had sex with a guy I didn't know. Started out being protected but suddenly (I guess I was too drunk to register that this had happened) the condom was off. It took me (I think) a couple minutes to realize. I immediately got him to pull out and it stopped there.
Now 4 months later: Asymptomatic. Been doing a lot of research and I can securely say I show no signs of any STD, but again, I know that many women can be asymptomatic for an alarming array of STDs.
And the plot twister: I'm in a Long D relationship, I haven't gotten tested yet because I've been in denial/too scared, and he just surprised me with a visit that's going to happen in 12 days. | Had unprotected sex for a couple minutes, asymptomatic and haven't gotten tested. Boyfriend unexpectedly visiting in 12 days. |
t3_4l5kol | relationships | My [33M] wife [33F] was having an online affair and fell in "love", sent over 200 pics and videos to him. How do I make this work? | On mobile so I apologize for any formatting errors.
This is a semi throwaway. My wife and I have been together for 15 years. We have 2 children ages 10 and 5. Our youngest in severely disabled.
Over the past 6 weeks my wife and I have been arguing pretty intensely with divorce coming up on more than one occasion. In my gut i knew she "had someone else" by the way she was talking to me. She always denied it. The fights continued.
We patched things up. I devoted my time and energy to showing her how much she meant to me, as you can imagine raising 2 children with one being disabled your love life can quickly get lost in the shuffle.
On my birthday at dinner I pried again about her cheating on me. She finally admitted it (happy birthday to me!!)
Turns out she's been messaging a married man in another state. Telling him she loved him, wants to be with him. She sent him over 200 pictures and videos. Some very provacitive but no nudes but also pics of our kids. This has been going on for 2 months.
The last time she messaged him according to her was Sunday (my birthday was Tuesday).
I'm willing to work on this because I love her and I love our children but I don't know how to do it.
I frequent this sub on my main account and have made posts on it from this account. I know it's always "no contact and divorce!"
But if that's not an option do you guys have any suggestions on how to move past this? | Wife having internet affair with married man, how do I stay together and move past this? |
t3_1v945x | relationships | How can I [22 F] gently break the news to my best friend [23/F] that the reason she has zero luck with guys is because she talks too much? | My best friend Lily is an amazing person. She's blonde, super fit, incredibly caring, loyal, honest, and silly. She constantly volunteers, helps organize the Walk For Diabetes, and currently works at a hospital researching a cure for Parkinson's. She's also one of the most intelligent people I know, and easily has a genius IQ. She's a fantastic catch, yet has absolutely no luck with guys, has never had a boyfriend, and has hardly gone past second base. Like everybody, she has a few odd quirks that could understandably put a few guys off (she's a HUGE fan of the Harry Potter series, is overly PC...), but nothing that warrants the zero response she gets from guys.
EXCEPT that she talks too much. Way, way too much. She can turn a story that I would say maybe three sentences max about into a twenty minute extravaganza, and she can do that with every single thing in her life. Since we live across the country from each other, she likes to talk to me on the phone once or twice a week. But after an hour of us talking about her life while I secretly reddit on my computer, I usually find a reason to leave. One time a few years ago, I even put the phone down and went to the bathroom, came back, picked up the phone, and I'm pretty sure she never even realized I was gone. Though she can talk forever, she's not self-absorbed or narcissistic; she always asks about my day (I usually only take 5 to 10 minutes to talk about it and then I'm done), and she goes far out of her way to do things for friends and strangers alike.
How do I gently break the news to her that this one huge personality flaw is what is keeping guys from staying interested? She's such an amazing person in every other way. I love her like a sister, and telling her about the problem would wound her terribly. But she's been becoming more and more desperate, and that's only making matters worse. How can I tell her, without ruining her self-esteem and basically telling her to change a major aspect of her personality? Advice please. | My best friend talks SO much that any guy who shows interest quickly changes his mind. How can I tell her about the problem? |
t3_etvo2 | relationship_advice | Is it her, or me? | This period of winter break has been the longest I have been away from my girlfriend. We're almost to a year together now and getting somewhat serious. In the last few weeks though, she's made very little effort to stay connected. She hates talking on the phone to begin with, and that hasn't changed recently. She also responds to texts and emails sporadically and infrequently. This is a concern to me for two reasons: First of all, it bothered me more than it probably should've. I've been having a rough time for financial and family reasons and my gf's aloofness has made me feel even more isolated. Second, we are considering trying a long-distance relationship for 1 year until we can meet up in grad school. This brief time apart has given me a glimpse of what she may be like in a LDR, and I haven't really liked what I've seen.
Am I expecting to much from her? Do I need to just cowboy up? If so, how I can I pull away/make myself less emotionally dependant on her? | bothered by long term gf's aloofness - her problem, or mine? |
t3_37wbxi | tifu | TIFU by making a SpongeBob reference to a cute girl | Obligatory it wasn't today...
PYSCH it was today (unfortunately)
Anyways I was talking to with my friend at the mall when this really cute girl approached us. She introduced herself, so did my friend. So she turned to me and asked me my name. So my super smooth brain decided to make a SpongeBob reference.
Cute girl: Hey what's your name?
OP: Um....the fork on the left? She instantly seemed weirded out and turned to my friend. Less than 5 minutes she suggested they spend the rest of the time at the mall together alone. Leaving me behind. They ended up banging at his house too =_=. Normally I wouldn't be bothered by this until he texted me the next day.
"Hey OP, when she approached us she was originally going for you cause you looked cute...but then hot weirded out by your reference that she didn't get...so she went to me"
That added a salt to my wounds...apparently first impressions matter
P.s. I wouldn't have done her anyway since she didn't get the SpongeBob reference... | Met a cute girl, I made a SpongeBob reference, she got weirded out and banged my best friend |
t3_179vp2 | relationships | Not sure if my [m25] gf [f30] of three months is sleeping with other guys :-( | Hi,
I met my current gf [30] on a dating site last October - things were going great (we get on like a house on fire, sex was good) - up until Christmas. We're from different countries (Ireland / Uk) but live in the same city, and both went home for the break. I've never been the best texter, so due to this & stubbourness (from both of us) we ended up not talking for a couple of weeks.
Eventually (after 2 weeks) I got in touch again & we started seeing each other again. All was going well again - but everytime I think we're going to get down to business - she says she's on her period still. This has been going on for 2 weeks now?! She's got a IUD (coil) fitted and I know this can cause slightly longer periods - but over 2 weeks? Personally - I think she's slept with someone else & doesn't want to put anyone at risk.
Further to this - last week when I went round her place - her housmate came out of her room 'becuse she heard male voice and wanted to see who it was, to see if there's any gossip' - why would she say this if strange male voices had not been heard recently?
I have no idea how to proceed? do I call her up on this? - obviously I have no concrete evidence to say she's slept with someone else - help! | Didn't talk to GF for few weeks - suspect she's slept with someone else in those few weeks - don't know how to confront her |
t3_q1qof | AskReddit | Would I run into any legal trouble if I started a Minecraft club at my University? | Note: I posted this in r/AskReddit and not r/Gaming or r/Minecraft because my question regards intellectual property rights in general, not something unique to Minecraft or gaming.
Here's some background info...
I started playing Minecraft back in early November of '11 and absolutely loved it. Since then, I've spent countless hours playing on both single player and multiplayer maps. I have also acquired an interest in messing with the games source code since I am almost finished with the Java course offered at my university. The other day, it occurred to me how awesome an official minecraft club would be, and I've been toying with the idea of starting one myself at my university. The point of this club would be part recreational and part educational: recreational in that we would end up playing lots of Minecraft and educational because I would like to focus a lot on using Java to make mods.
My concern is that I will run into red tape regarding the actual use of the Minecraft source code. For those of you that don't know, the .jar file that comes with the Minecraft download is obfuscated, so clearly the developers don't want just anyone to access it. In order to overcome this, a free, third party program called Minecraft Coder Pack (MCP) provides means to deobfuscate the code so that anyone can access it, edit it, and reobfuscate it. If I was going to make an official club that modded Minecraft, we would clearly have to make frequent use of this program, or at the very least, find some alternative way of getting around the obfuscation.
My question is: does circumventing the obfuscation of Minecraft's code violate any kind of intellectual property laws? Could I get into legal trouble for deobfuscation?
I may be overthinking this since anyone who mods Minecraft has to bypass its obfuscation. An analogy that I have used to rationalize my idea is that huge numbers of people download music illegally, but there are very rarely any consequences for doing so. If you don't make lots of noise and do it quietly, no one notices. However, if I tried to start a file sharing club at my university, I'd get into a lot of trouble very fast (assuming the club was even approved). | just because everyone does it doesn't mean it's legal. |
t3_2ojcf9 | relationships | Me [22F] with my boyfriend [22M] 1 year +, How to bring up the fact that I think He's losing interest. | Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year, but the last month and a bit I feel like he's been more distant than usual.
He's really introverted, so I'm used to him wanting alone time, but lately even our time together seems to consist of him on his desktop playing video games and me laying around his apartment, then sex, then bed time. I don't really have a problem with this at all, but lately I've been getting the vibe that maybe he's just not that in to me anymore.
I know the solution is to talk to him about it, but I don't know how to bring it up with out making it sound like I have a problem with how we are now, or sounding overly paranoid if I'm wrong. | How should I bring up concerns about my boyfriend's interest in our relationship with out sounding paranoid or like I'm unhappy? |
t3_k9nfw | AskReddit | Mexican Redditors... Does it offend you when I attempt to speak to you in my pathetic excuse for Spanish? | Background info:
When I was growing up I would always go to the same Mexican food restaurant with my dad. Every time I would go, he would always have me respond in the little Spanish I knew. sin cebolla, gracias, por favor, etc.
Fast forward 15 years, to this day I still do the same thing when I see an Mexican person whose primary language is obviously Spanish I usually will throw in a Senior or Gracias when I speak to them.
My question to you, Mexican redditors, does this offend you? Please feel free ask any parental figures who may not be able to read this post. | Does it offend you when non-mexican people throw various Spanish words when speaking to you. |
t3_1dcdcq | relationships | Saying "I love you" in an on-again, off-again relationship (20f, 23m) | My boyfriend (23m) and I (20f) first began dating a year and a half ago. We quickly fell for each other and I was the first to say "I love you" about 3 months into the relationship. He said it back right away. Due to timing issues, we broke up two months later. During our break-up, I asked if he had ever loved me, and he said, "I don't know, maybe I just got caught up in the moment. I really care about you, though."
We were on-and-off for a few months, but I was too scared to use the word "love" again. On Valentine's Day this year, he started reaching out to me again to start the relationship. He wrote me a long, romantic letter explaining why I was so important to him and why he wanted to be in a relationship, and signed it "love." We've been together for about two months again now and I'm really happy. I can definitely see us having a happy future together, and that excites me.
I want to tell him I love him, but I'm afraid to be the first one to say it again. I think he does love me, but he's not great at expressing himself or talking about emotions -- he's been able to bring up the subject of marriage and kids, but the word "love" scares him off, I think.
Should I bring it up? If so, how? | Nervous about saying "I love you" again with an on-again, off-again boyfriend now that we've rekindled our relationship. |
t3_2texfn | relationships | I (17M) found out my gf(17F) is smoking 2 cigarettes a day and I hate it | Me and my gf have been happily dating for a year. I'm about to graduate HS in may and she is a junior. A few months ago I caught her dipping and she wouldn't quit. She finally did after a month of support. I told her no more or we were through. She was OK with this.
This month I've been a bit distant because of other issues and she's been skipping school a lot. She is suspicious, and one day she goes to her car during lunch. I follow because i was worried, and i really wanted the truth, (she never gives the full truth)When I came to her car she freaked out and hid something under her seat. She wouldn't tell me what was up, and I let it go as I wasn't sure.
2 days later we have a big fight about her skipping and being really suspicious. We almost break up. This morning she called me and then came over and we cuddled like normal. After some prodding she confessed to smoking. I can't stand smoking but I love her so much. She dropped me off at school and she is skipping school again. Should I end it? I want to help her quit but I don't think she will. I don't think I can trust her anymore. | Gf is smoking after I told her it was over if I saw it again. I don't know if she will quit. Am i being to harsh? |
t3_ok467 | self | Why so many people (on reddit also) brag about using adblock when it should be socially condemned? | I'm especially talking to everyone using adblock:
You are so "anty-sopa" "anty-censorship" and your arguments are about that google, youtube, facebook etc. wouldn't be able to exist in their form, well think, if everyone would use adblock they would just perish. That's what you want? Isn't it a little hypocrisy?
If everyone had adblock, only gov sites and maybe few that get money from people would survive.
I'm fair (in my understanding of fairness). If adverts on page are too annoying, block my view etc. i just block them and don't give a fuck, it's two clicks on opera, other browsers probably have something similar. But why would i cut someone who is giving me something (free knowledge etc) while not disturbing me from surfing the web from their revenue?
Recently a lot of people whine about ads on youtube, i think they do it just because they are ads. When they are long you can skip them, so what's the problem. And i even watched few to the end because i was curious (they are not so dull as ads in tv, because, well, you can skip them).
I think, for some people sites should be totally free, without any ads with super fast load, full of unicorns and other rainbows. Unfortunately unicorns aren't so popular nowadays, because world doesn't work that way. | Why are you so hypocritical when on one side you are anty-sopa, and on the other you take the only revenue of most sites? |
t3_437zht | relationships | [25F] Scared of Marriage. Wtf is wrong with me? | SO [24M] and I have been together for 9 years. He recently proposed to me, and I said no.
I have never wanted to get married, and although I want to spend the rest of my life with him, I don't want the social and cultural implications that come with it.
There is this idea that young girls dream of their wedding day, and having a family, but it has never appealed to me.
What is wrong with me? If SO were to write a post about me on reddit, everyone would say to dump me. How can I correct this? | I want to live my life with my SO, but don't want to be married. How do I make myself want to do this? |
t3_176bff | relationships | My crush [F14] told me that she liked me [M14] but I am still in a relationship with my girlfriend [F13] who i have been dating for 4 months. Should I break up with my girlfriend to be with my crush? | My Crush texted me saying that "I really like you but I know you will never feel the same about me, I hope our friendship isn't ruined because of this" I replied saying that I like her too i just don't know what to do about my girlfriend. She said she doesn't want to be the reason I break up with my girlfriend but cheating is not an option.
I am decently happy with my relationship. We haven't had any actual fights but she doesn't like many of the other girls and popular people in my class so when I want to hangout with my friends she stays behind with her friends who are kind of boring to be around. My crush on the other hand is very popular and fun to be around. I have no idea what to do, should I break up with my girlfriend to be with my crush or tell her that I am happy with my relationship and I don't want to see anyone else. | My crush told me that she liked me but I have a girlfriend. should I break up with my girlfriend to be with my crush? |
t3_4gbqrk | AskDocs | Extremely irritated lips/mouth? | I am a 17 year old female, 5'5" tall and weigh 135 pounds. I'm very active and do sports and lift weights all year round.
So I've had eczema and pretty sensitive skin for as long as I can remember. It began to clear up and I've had virtually no problems with it until around 2 or 3 years ago. I used to only have it on my arms, but now it has come back in full force, on my arms, completely covering my hands, in between by toes, and all around my mouth.
My arms, hands, and feet are definitely manageable, but my lips and mouth are so irritated every single day it's starting to become a chore to even keep them not cracked and irritated for longer than an hour. They've definitely gotten worse in the last year, and they've become almost unmanageable. I have to exfoliate the dead, dry, peeling skin off of them every single day, at least once.
For the past year or so I have completely stopped using chapstick, and have stuck to solely Aquaphor, but not until about a week ago did I find out that Aquaphor is just a skin protectant and not necessarily a skin healer. For about a week I've been putting olive and coconut oil on my lips and they improved for probably a day, and now they're back to being very very irritated, itchy, red, and they sting very badly.
I think that it's eczema and I have been prescribed triamcinolone but I know that I'm not supposed to use it on my face. I am at a total loss of what I can possibly do for my lips. I've tried to become completely dairy and gluten free and improve my diet (it used to be very bad) for more purposes than just my skin. I have no idea what I can do at this point. I have tried to get my mother to make me a dermatologist appointment but she just tells me that if I eat better and put oils on them it should get better. Nothing is working!! Please help!!:) | My lips are ridiculously dry, peeling, and irritated. I have had eczema all my life and think it's related, but nothing I do helps. |
t3_quuc7 | relationships | Asked a friend out and I've been plummeted deeper into the friend-zone. Should I just move on from her? | I've (I'm 19) had really strong feelings for my best friend (a girl, aged 19) for about a year now. All that's really happened between us was one drunken night last summer where we did have sex but nothing really went on from there. We have always been sort of flirty towards each other also. I've been feeling this way for ~2 years... but long after we were actually friends. She always gave me these hints that something could happen, but...
Recently, I decided to ask her if we should go out or not. I was fed up wondering "what if" and I just wanted to know. She said the usual "you're like a brother/that's as far as it's gonna go etc".
Obviously I was crushed, but I couldn't take the wondering any more. I started to think I was confusing romantic feelings for friendship because we have been through a lot together.
But no. I still feel crushed and whenever I talk to her, she seems fine but I just feel awkward. I've probably ruined the friendship by opening my big mouth, but yeah...
Should I just move on and distance myself from her? It just doesn't feel right any more. I respect the fact that she isn't obliged to return her feelings. | Tried to ask friend out; friend-zone; feeling like shit; what do I do now? |
t3_hxebp | AskReddit | Someone explain the logistics of this to me? I'm having a hard time with the math. | So I'm standing in line at Walmart, and a couple is in front of me with a 3 or 4 year old kid. The man and woman are in their early 30s, at the oldest. I'm standing there thinking "Well that's a little late to start having kids, but whatever, they probably got their whole life figured out and then had the kid, good for them."
Then the kid turns around, looks the man right in the eyes, and says "Grampa can I get a candy bar?"
That got me thinking... Let's say the kid is 3 and the couple is 35, for argument's sake. That's only 32 years from grandson to grandparents. | Why do people have kids so fucking young? |
t3_1sr8ey | AskReddit | How/Why have CO and WA taken different paths to pot legalization? | First, I know this isn't a "fun" question, more about public policy, governance, and the nitty-gritty of regulation and less about 'Getting high with Dinosaurs'. Second, I'm just a layperson, so if any of my assumptions are screwy, fire away!
So, both states have had medical MJ permitted already (Though I don't know what will happen to the MMJ dispensaries, and to their patients--both the ones with intractable cancer and the young stoners with nonspecific ailments, no disrespect), but the states seem to be going different ways towards legalization of recreational pot... Why?
As far as I can tell, Washington State has taken this super-cautiously, soliciting bids for competent public policy experts and settling on the consultancy of UCLA Prof Mark Kleiman {[4min Cnn interview] [profile in DailyBeast] [covered in NewYorker](
Meanwhile, Colorado seems unprepared for its Jan 1st, 2014 deadline. ("[lawmakers have been scrambling to get the proper rules in the books] state's 160 hopeful pot shops are so mired in red tape and confusion](
This perplexes me, as CO has had a robust and fair apparatus for enforcing existing medical marijuana, the Marijuana Enforcement Division. So why not do as WA, and take time to study it? Most news coverage seems to say Colorado is hurrying. | How do you think legalization regulations in the two states differ, and why do you think they aren't more similar? |
t3_1pc7yu | relationships | Me [19 M] with my boyfriend [18 M] of 10 months, why do I feel so bad? | So we've been dating now for about 10 months, we're in a long distance relationship and I'm not sure if I can handle it any more. He's happy with our relationship as it is. We're not sexual at the moment but that's not something that's a huge problem to me for now.
The problem I have is him hiding stuff from me, it's not fully hiding stuff from me in the sense that he's done something wrong, but I can't shred the feeling that I'm not important enough or that he doesn't want me to see some things.
So I guess the question is what's being hidden? Pretty much anything that involves him online I'm not allowed to look at and I'm deemed a stalker if I find/look at anything. This includes his reddit account - I looked at his reddit once, and he now made a new reddit account and doesn't use his old one, his imgur was deleted even though it contained pictures important to me, his twitch, he doesn't like himself very much but he won't take any pictures for me even though we've been dating for a long time, and used to do pictures. But now he doesn't want to send me any - even just any pictures.
I don't really know what I'm asking/saying at all I just needed to get it off my chest because I'm not coping myself any more. On top of that I was just gonna ask if it's wrong for me to want to be able to see his reddit/anything online and stuff like that, am I stalking to want to look occasionally? No I don't want to sit there looking at it all day just once in a while to see what's happening with him.
Does anyone have any advice or similar experiences? I've tried talking to him about it but it doesn't seem to help. I've put up with it for a long time and I love him but I don't know if I can do it anymore.
Sorry this should probably go in off my chest or somewhere like that, and sorry for it being so long and possibly stupid, I'm not the best at explaining and typing when I'm emotional. | Having a few problems with my partner and would like someone to talk to. |
t3_2pon8w | relationships | Me [19 M] breaking up with [19 F] girlfriend of two and a half weeks. Rushed relationship gone wrong. | So i met this girl at the folkhighschool (norwegian thing), i was interested in her from early in the year, but we never really got to know each other.
And so, three days before the prom, i showed some more interest for her. We hang out here and there, and on prom night everything escalated out of everything I thought would happen. Before i knew it, she was sleeping at my place and we were a couple.
We were the buzz around the school, and before I was able to really get to know her, it was official.
Now, two and a half weeks later, i've decided that I have to break up with her. She is not the right one for me. | My relationship was rushed, and offical before I was able to figure out if she was the right one for me. |
t3_3gge72 | relationships | I [20M] think I have a serious issue that affects my relationships | I have had two official girlfriends in my life, and I think I'm very controlling and too narcissistic.
My real worry came from a dream I just had last night, all I remember is having women in my life apologize to me except for my most recent ex. And it was bothering me that she wasn't apologizing to me.
I think that is an accurate representation of my life. In my last relationship whenever I did something bad and she'd point it out I'd get angry and point out something she did ages ago. In fact it was the same thing I couldn't forgive. I broke up with her because I saw I was hurting her a lot for that one mistake and I couldn't see myself getting past it.
My first girlfriend was a complete bitch. I don't remember having any such problems like this until I caught her lying about such a major thing. Over and over again.
Due to all of this (I haven't really stated a lot of things because it's a lot and I found it quite difficult to confess all of that) I feel like I don't want to be in a relationship anymore. And no children. But I still date girls and I'm starting to develop feelings for one, I don't want to hurt anyone. | I'm a terrible controlling and narcissistic man who doesn't want to hurt any more women. |
t3_25rk25 | offmychest | Three solemn promises I'm making to the one dude who actually ends up reading this | So … I originally came here to complain and vent, but now I've realized how grateful I should actually be. After all, I'm alive; I've got my health; I've got my youth; I've got a loving family; I've got supportive friends; and lastly, I've got time to grow.
Furthermore, I want to make you some promises, Reddit. From here on out:
1.) **I'm going to stop lying so much.** Yeah, not proud of this, but it's true. I compulsively lie to those around me to make myself look better or to avoid being pitied. In retrospect, it all stems from my self-esteem issues, which I'm also working on.
2.) **I'm going to be more confident.** I've missed out on so many opportunities due to how self-deprecating I've become, and, quite frankly, I'm sick of it. Time to start believing in how boundlessly productive my future can really be.
3.) **I'm going adopt a sickening work ethic.** A common thing I tell people is that I'm "working" on a startup or project idea or some healthy lifestyle change. But, in all reality, I never dedicate any serious amount of time to any of those things. Fortunately, that was the old me. Now, I'm going to stick to my plans and work at them consistently. I'm done pretending to be doing big things. All I intend on doing is bettering my life little by little: building myself out of this current situation through persistence and dedication.
Eh, that's pretty much it. I know nobody'll care. I just felt like sharing. Hopefully, this post serves as mental reinforcement for the personal journey I'm about to go on. | I'm tired of being a basic bitch. |
t3_32zouu | relationships | Me [20 M] with my SO [19 F] duration, 3 years - never good enough | After being with my SO for a while (we have had a few breaks) I feel like she doesn't find me attractive anymore.
I try and be sexy but she doesn't for me and I try and go through all this effort to just get her to say I look hot or something but she never does anymore, she just seems to get annoyed at my efforts to impress her.
She always says she's tired and is not flirty with me at all anymore. It's all quite strict and routine but I don't know how to change that up and to have fun and shake things up. She won't stay up to play video games with me or watch a film. In fact anything I suggest like an anime or film she always either falls asleep half way through or flat out refuses to take part in it, leaving me to do it on my own.
I feel like I spend a lot of time trying to get involved in her activities and such but with little reward as I hardly get a response out of her. If i try to start an interesting topic of conversation I get small answers in return.
We hardly ever make love but she enjoys a little cuddle occasionally. It's not that a feel she doesn't love me but just that I don't put the fire in her eyes like I used to. So how can I go about being the guy of her dreams again? | I don't feel my SO finds me attractive/fun, how can I be her dream guy again? |
t3_1jy02j | relationship_advice | (23/m) sad but mostly confused with ending of relationship. (19/f) | So, aforementioned girl came after me and for about a week solid would flirt with me and talk to me a lot. The following week she was busy and didn't talk to me much at all but did say she missed me. I was very apprehensive of the whole ordeal since I am not terribly lucky when it comes to ladies.
However, eventually we went on a date it went well, she cuddled up to me during the movies, we kissed, and things seem to go well for the week and a half. Then she messaged me and told me that she would like to be with me because I am a nice guy but doesn't have that emotional connection to want to be with me. It hurt since i had started to already really feel for this girl, but rather early then later.
So, my question comes, why the chase if she didn't feel that way? Why be affectionate and cuddly? Part of me feels like i just got played. Which, that sucks because in October supposed to be going to NYCC with her and rooming with her... Not sure if that will happen now. | girl chased me pretty hard, only to say she likes me but not in that emotional sense. |
t3_1fbnpl | offmychest | Well...... | I am that guy. That one that whenever something bad happens, someone hurts your feelings, someone belittles you, someone mistreats you in any way. I am that guy you turn to make your self feel better. Whenever things are going good you don't want to say a damn word to me, but the second something doesn't go how you want it to; you blow my phone up.
I was an idiot to think something was there. Oh wait no I was an idiot for letting myself get lead on for so long. I should have realized months ago whenever you didn't respond the first time. But no. I kept taking "sure I definitely would but" as a fucking answer and kept the flame of hope alive. Hell, of course, I am convenient for you every time you have been down I have surprised you with a gift. Whenever you got dumped a three weeks before Christmas; I was there. Whenever you were lonely because you didn't have anyone to talk to since you worked overnight and your friends slept normal hours I was there, whenever you got so stressed out that you want to tell everyone to "fuck off" I was there. Each time to cheer you up and make you feel better about yourself. Yet every time I asked to do something I would get "sounds good" or "I definitely would but I have to work" and you would never follow up on it.
It is funny how you dodge the question so easily now. I told you after the first text that if you told me "no" or asked me to "stop" I would. It is obvious you want nothing to do with me. SO JUST SAY It.
I have already moved on. at least mostly. ..... | just mostly ranting what is on my mind. I feel a girl I like is using me to make her self feel better while leading me on, while I debate on whether to move on or continue the pursuit. |
t3_esdgx | AskReddit | I'm such a bitch and an awful friend... | I have two friends who got in a big fight and "broke up", now we aren't allowed to invite them both to the same party so we have to choose who we're going to invite every time we have something.
I was a bridesmaid for Friend A, but I'm really not that close to her because we're both shy. However she's the crowd favourite so she's the one that usually gets invited to everyone else's get togethers.
I'm much closer with Friend B but she's a talker and although people like her she sometimes goes on about boring things and sometimes you have to walk on eggshells with her because she'll blow up if you say the wrong thing. I prefer her one on one, but I like her and have no problem inviting her to things.
So I'm having a housewarming party on Wednesday and my husband created the FB event and invited Friend A before asking me who we should invite. It's Friend B's turn to be invited but I can't uninvite Friend A and honestly I know that A will be more welcome by my other friends.
Today I came clean to B about it and she went off about how she feels like nobody likes her and how we always pick A over her and I feel really bad. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I always feel like when I'm having a party I should throw together the group of people that will get along the best, and she tends to say some off-putting things and make people uncomfortable sometimes.
I'm thinking of just inviting both from now on and letting them deal with it, but I'm pretty sure that would mean that A would never come to an event again. I wish they would just make up so that we don't have to put up with this bullshit at 26 FREAKING YEARS OLD but I don't see that happening either.
Now B is mad at me (even though she says it's okay) and I'm feeling awful, but it's not like I can just hide a party in this facebook universe so one of them will always have their feelings hurt.
This isn't really a question so maybe the wrong subreddit, but maybe someone can give me some advice to deal with this shit? | Chose one friend over the other, now feeling like a shady bitch. |
t3_24h8eq | relationships | My [22F] Dad's [50M] new wife and family [50-80M/F] keep calling me daughter/niece. How do I get it to stop? | My parents got divorced when I was 15. My dad and I had a pretty rough time of it as I was growing up and I haven't lived with him since my junior year of high school. We've had a rocky time since then as well, and I haven't been around for a lot. I first met his new wife the christmas before they got engaged. She is a nice enough woman, and I actually like her more than my dad. She's very sweet, very good to me, and I couldn't have asked for a better person to marry my dad. They've been married for about ~3 years now, if I remember correctly.
The problem comes in that she had her family have recently started calling me daughter/niece without my permission. While I'm happy that they've included me, it makes me uncomfortable. The new wife did not raise me or birth me. I hadn't lived with my dad for a good amount of time before they met. I don't know a good way to address this. If she had been in my life and had some hand in raising me then I could understand the connection, but I only come over for dinner every once in a while and sometimes on holidays. She's not my mother, and my mother is still in the picture and very supportive of me, so it's not like she thinks she's "filling a void".
I guess I'm just looking for a tactful way to tell them that while I appreciate the gesture, it needs to stop. | Dad's new wife and family calls me her daughter, even though I've only known her for 3 or so years. How do I get it to stop? |
t3_3legi5 | legaladvice | (Logan, UT) Our new property manager is threatening to block any devices that aren't used solely for Work/School in our apartment. | Our contract says, "Basic cable, utilities, and Internet are included in the rent." Our old landlord had wifi for each apartment. It wasn't the best but as college students we didn't complain.
This fall our landlord sold the property and the new landlord got new wifi and upgraded it to business class. The problem is that all ~30 tenants are using split between two and it is significantly slower.
Our landlord contacted Comcast and found that there were "67" devices connected to the wifi.
To "fix" this, our landlord sent a notice that any device that wasn't being used for school or work would be blocked.
To us this is a big problem and we are really stressing out about it. We all have phones, laptops, and desktops that are used for school as well as leisure. We also have xbox ones and ps4s.
What is the best course of action to keep decent wifi? | New wifi is very slow. The landlord says that only devices for school or work are allowed now. We didn't pay for a place off campus to do homework. We paid for a home while we go to school. |
t3_1mx2pi | relationships | I 21/M found and read my girlfriends 19/F phone, feeling awful and don't know how to handle it | Well, I was taking care of my girl after a party. After she passed out I sat back in my room and there it was..her phone. I took it and read, still talking to her ex boyfriend whom she said that she was no longer on a relationship level for a bit. Found some things I shouldn't have found and now I feel awful for ever doing something.
Ignorance is bliss I guess, but for as bad as I feel ,don't I deserve to confront her?
Do I swallow my pride, and embarrass myself with the truth I intercepted or do I bury my pain and heartbreak and pretend like I never found it? | Found girls phone, found she has been keeping the truth. Don't know if I should confront her |
t3_2ejlcr | relationship_advice | [F18] proposed to steady bf [m22] of two years. He said he'd think about it. Help?! | We've expressed for the longest time that we want to be a constant in each others lives. Recently we've been planning how we'd stay close while I'm in the military (to make money so that we can fulfill his dream of living out our lives in Japan- long story that doesn't pertain to what I'm needing advice for). I want nothing more than to give him the world and I thought he'd agree that getting married would be as natural and easy as breathing. He said, "I'll think about it. Okay?" He even gave me a time line: December. WTF? I'm so confused and heart achy. How do I keep my cool while I wait? I know better than to harass him about it. And a tiny coldly logical part of me says to break everything off now instead of dragging my heart around until I leave this summer. Both of us agree that long distance relationships don't work. Maybe it's self preservation but how can I allow my emotions to be war zone whilst I'm in one as well? | Long time bf basically just gave our relationship an expiration date. How can I help myself and him last past it? |
t3_2sgdlx | Dogtraining | Older dog with food aggression. | Gunner (6 year old lab) is a really good calm dog most of the time. Except when its time for him to eat.
Rewind about 2 years, when I moved into my parents place until I finished college he had never showed any signs of food aggression. We moved in there and all of a sudden he was very growly about his food. I figured it was because they had a dog in the house and Gunner was the dominate one of the two. I worked with him then and couldn't get him to curb his attitude.
Fast forward a year. I had to move to Louisiana for a job, and wasn't able to take Gunner with me, so he said at my parents place. Didn't really get worked with as far as the food aggression goes. His bowl was out in the garage and he would just eat away from the other dog.
Now that I'm back and we have our own place he is still showing these growly signs. I've been working with him on it and it seems to not be going anywhere. Also I've come to find out he HATES other dogs other than my parents dog.
Its one thing to keep him away from other dogs, thats fine, however tonight I walked passed him as he was eating dinner and he turned around and snapped. I will not have that. Period.
So any help or suggestions would be great!! | Older dog acquired a food aggression about two years ago, along with a hate of other dogs. Need help breaking him of all bad habits. |
t3_4x3wit | relationships | I [24M] am seriously punching far above my weight with the girl [22F] I'm dating. Tips? | I've been dating this girl for a month and some change now, and she is far out of my league. I'm talking like I'm D3 college football and she's the NFL. I know you guys don't believe in "leagues", but most people end up dating a partner of similar attractiveness. She shares my sense of humor and is witty as fuck. I can playfully make fun of her and she'll throw it right back at me. Lots of verbal sparring. On top of all that, she's very conventionally attractive, with a fuckton of followers on instagram. In contrast, I'm just a normal guy who just finally broke out of my shell this past year. I'm not a frat brother with a bunch of connections or money. I'm not extremely fit either, I just lift to stop being skinny and I take boxing classes (definitely not good at it either) for self-defense. Prior to her, I have zero experience with girls.
Because of all that, I have barely any clue why she's with me. Apparently I'm "genuine", whatever that means. I didn't put in the legwork of asking her out; she asked me out. In fact, the only time I made a move in the beginning was when I sloppily kissed her at the bar. Now, I know any insecurity on my part will kill the relationship, so I've been doing my best job to not let it get to me. I'm adopting an attitude of "let the chips fall where they may" at this time, but it is still very unnerving when an objectively better guy (by looks, wealth, etc) hits on her in front of me. | I'm dating a girl far out of my "league", and I need help keeping it together. |
t3_3q6u08 | relationships | I (28/M) feel the need to share my insecurities with my girlfriends when I grow close to them. It always ruins the relationship. But, as a guy, who else can I share this stuff with? | I was reading the [Girls, what turns you away from guys?] askreddit post yesterday, and realized I do a few of the things people HATE, particularly the negativity and insecurity answers.
I've realized recently that I've only had two types of relationships. I've had two long-term relationships (both ~3 years) where I never felt close enough to the girl to emotionally open up to her (including my insecurities), and this inadvertently prolonged the relationship (because apparently girls like that). But, it never felt very satisfying to me, like I was forced to pretend to be something I'm not. I never felt comfortable. I kept waiting for it to get better but it never did and eventually I had to end it.
Alternatively, I've had a few relationships where I feel like maybe I've finally met a girl who can accept me and understand me fully, even it comes with some insecurities. So after getting off to a great start (~2 months), I start opening up emotionally, and the girls always react very negatively. It usually kills things, and it drags out for a little while longer but the initial attraction and love she felt for me never returns.
So I'm stuck. The only way I can successfully have a long-term relationship is by pretending to be a perfect person with no issues, and as a result I will never truly love my partner or feel committed to her or fully enjoy the relationship. But, as a guy, I don't feel comfortable sharing this part of myself with family or friends, I need to be REALLY close to someone to do it. So what's the alternative? I guess I could get a therapist but I don't like the thought of that, and I don't want to spend money on it anyway. | Stay emotionally closed, end up with unfulfilling long-term relationship. Open up emotionally, end up with no relationship. How can I have it all? |
t3_2p6wjj | relationships | Me [24M] with my Girlfriend [20F] of 18 months, I'm materialistic and she is adventurous. | We are discussing an overseas holiday after we finish university. She loves the idea of travelling and is adventurous to try new things. She has spoken about wanting to create memories and how important they are to her. Myself, I would much prefer to spend the money on goods that would be long lasting, such as a computer, TV, better car. For myself these goods out way the short few weeks of a holiday.
While I understand you can create lifelong memories with travel I feel I enjoy the benefits that material goods give me more. I don't find travel a waste of money for other people, but for myself I don't find it worth it.
I have agreed to go along with this purely because I know its important to her. However I can't just change how I feel about this, and she and I am worried my mood may ruin the trip and the whole experience for us.
Are some people just different and can't change their values of these things or is their some way I can overcome this? | Girlfriend values travel and the experiences it offers. I value material possessions. How can we come to an understanding. |
t3_487x4b | relationships | Friend [24 F] getting married to her [24 M] fiance after dating for about 7 years has decided to stop having sex until the wedding night to make it special without discussing with him first. Is that normal/healthy? | My friend [24 F] is getting married and has decided in all of her wisdom to stop sleeping with her fiance. They've been together 7 years and living together for 4 of those years. He is in absolute agony about it and keeps telling her how not ok it is. She has decided to stay at her parents house until their wedding night to prevent "temptation" from arising.
They have been having sex for the full 7 years years. This is not a waiting for marriage thing. They've been living together and sleeping in the same bed. What's the deal? Is that even sexually healthy? She didn't ask and they didn't discuss this "special night" and its plans; she just decided this was the best way to do things without any input. | My friend stopped sleeping with her future husband to make the wedding night special, but they didn't agree to do it (she did). Is it normal or even healthy for the relationship? |
t3_2v3vjo | relationships | Me [22F] with my friend [25 M] I feel like I screwed up our friendship... | This guy, we'll call him James, was a senior my freshman year of high school. Just recently we became back in to contact with each other about a year ago since I transferred to a college an hour and a half south of our hometown.
We're both in jazz combos, he always compliments my playing, tells me I sound great, I should take more solos, etc. I even talked to him the other day and he smiled the whole time I talk to him. I also had other friends who were positive he liked me back.
So, I sent him a text saying "Hey, James. I like you and if you want to hang out some time, that would be awesome. If not, that's okay too. I hope we can still be friends."
His response was, "Hey, HezkaHolka. You're a sweet girl and we can totally still be friends."
I honestly don't know what happen. I did text him last night and asked if he still wanted to watch A Million Ways To Die In The West but never got a response.
I have to see him on a regular basis and I'm absolutely terrified of seeing him again. | Opened up to a guy I thought liked me back, but he rejected me. Trying to figure out what went wrong. |
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