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t3_2vqmlq | relationships | Me [15 M] obsessed w/ girl on track team[15 F], frustrating me a TON | So I have known her for about maybe 5 months at the most, but the first time I saw her I was like woah! She's pretty pretty, and extremely nice. I saw her once at a track meet and maybe 3 weeks later I joined the place where she practiced (call it karma).
I've talked to her about like 3 times (I count lame right) and I just can't stop thinking about her except for never! She has always started the conversation so idk what I should do. She seems to be on my mind all the time. I feel like if I try to talk to her someone is silently judging me for talking to her (I'm not the hottest star in the universe)
Either I need to forget about her or do something else. I don't have any social media so I can't really connect with her outside of practice. Even then if i was like 2 meters away from her I wouldn't know what to say.
It's taking up too much energy for me to crush on her so either I approach her or forget her. She's really pretty though.
Sorry for blabbering, but I'm desperate (and sleepy). You can PM for more details about anything. I'm open about giving more information. | I think I am infatuated with a girl and don't know what do to. Should I try to forget about her (how do I do that?) or what should I do... I'm clueless (and really obsessed.) |
t3_20z87h | relationships | [21M] Arguments for/against an open relationship? | I'm currently seeing someone [21F] who just got out of a really serious long term relationship. We were friends before and just started hooking up and going out on dates (both foodies, enjoy meandering around the city, etc.). She doesn't want to commit to an exclusive relationship, and I don't blame her. I've never done all these things with someone - going on dates, hooking up - and not called it a relationship; it feels weird.
Because I understand her reasoning in not committing, I've been trying to mute my feelings towards her. I feel like my feelings are misplaced just because I have fun with her; it's someone I get to mess around with and hang out with and connect on a deeper level with. I know logically a relationship wouldn't work out right now, even though sometimes I fantasize that it would.
Is staying in this "open relationship" healthy for me? I've always tended to think that open relationships weren't healthy for anyone and that they never ended well for either party. I feel that being in one might take away from what a real relationship (with any girl) should be in the future. On the other hand, if I can keep my feelings at bay, what would the benefits be, aside from being able to see other people? | What are your arguments for an open relationship? |
t3_2svg89 | relationships | Can I [22 M] make a relationship work with super rich [21F]? | I come from a very modest family and grew up in a shithole neighbourhood. However I worked hard in school and managed to get into a top ranking Univeristy/College.
While there are some others like me, the majority of students in my class have have come from super wealthy families and elite circles.
This girl and I have gone on a few dates but I can't shake the feeling that we would ultimately be incompatible. I really like her and I think she likes me just as much but we've come from totally different backgrounds. In her Facebook photos she's travelled to so many places around the world, lived in the most luxurious places, been to hundreds of events and even hanged out with a few celebrities backstage.
I'm worried that I'm just not good enough for her. How can i ever compare to her and what she already seen? What can i give to her that she doesnt have already or to take her to places she's used to or buy her expensive things?
Should I just stop seeing her to spare myself future heartbreak? Has anyone here ever dated someone significantly wealthier than themselves? How did it workout? | Come from different background to wealthy girl I'm dating. Doubting if it can work - mainly self doubt if I can ever compare to what she's done .What to do? |
t3_16pfv8 | AskReddit | Am I doing it all wrong? | Welp, I really can't complain about anything in my life. I go to a good college where I have a lot of fun. I was raised in a stable household. My parents never really restricted me from doing anything, but aside from regular neighborhood shennanigans, I never really got into any serious trouble. I LOVE technology and all this crazy stuff in our generation, but whenever I read about or watch something having to do with anything up through the 1970s, I can't help but think that I would enjoy myself more fully if I were living more simply. I'm really not trying to sound like a hippy or anything here but I figured this would be the best place to find some people that would seriously discuss this sort of thing with me. I always find myself wishing I was raised in my parents era, where everyone was allowed to do much more and not worry about getting in trouble, relationships were formed in person (i know, a bit ironic that I am on reddit), people would make their own fun, and of course, the music. I mean, I know I am kinda ranting now, but I hope at least one person makes it this far without dismissing their thoughts. Aside from this whole generation thing, I always wonder about my life choices. As I stated I go to college, and I like to believe that this is because it interests me and I think it will help me make a difference, but almost daily, I question myself. Should I just be camping and exploring out on the road? Should I go try to make a living as a snowboard instructor so I can live on a mountain and do what I love daily? Should I have not gone to college to pursue what I love the most, playing music? I feel like I took the "safe" route. I don't plan on dropping out, I have a lot of fun and am extremely fortunate to be able to go to my college, but I just wanted to see if there was anyone out there that felt similar/has advice/had ANYTHING to say out there. Am I doing it all wrong? | I feel like I am taking the "safe" route with college and maybe missing out on a more exciting life. |
t3_1btuai | AskReddit | When was a day in your life when Murphy's Law came into effect? | Drove 25 miles to get a friend, the moment I got there I hit a bump and one of my radiator hoses SNAPPED off my truck and completely broke, leading my truck to start billowing smoke and loose all it's coolant almost breaking my truck. Through a series of dumb ideas I came up with a temp fix to attempt to get home, about halfway there, that completely fails, I miss my exit and end up downtown during a festival. As I struggle to get to my nearest pep boys, my truck goes into the red zone so I finally give in and call a tow truck, he get's lost, finally gets there, I have to ride with him cramped with my friend I'm sitting on a cupholder so now my rump hurts, we get to pep boys, after about an hour of waiting they say they have to keep my truck overnight. Nobody to take us home so we have to call a cab, he speaks so weak english I can't tell him my address, so he gets the approximate address, and ended up being about 15$ more since he drove longer. But... finally home, until tomorrow where I have to go get my truck. | truck broke, stupidity happens, lot's of driving. Murphy's law is a bitch. |
t3_3dx2j0 | relationships | Best friend of 3 years (20F) confessed feelings for me (18M) currently with gf of 6 months (19F), putting me in an awkward position, what do I do? | I mean I really don't want to end any contact with my best friend, who we'll call Jenny, but I don't want to jeopardize anything with my girlfriend who we'll call Amanda.
Jenny and I have been best friends for 3 years and have been through a hell of a lot together so the concept of dropping contact to wait this out seems like kind of a shitty option. I don't want it to happen. She says this isn't the first time she's had feelings for me, and has when I was in previous relationships. I'm not sure why she's decided to tell me this time; she says she doesn't expect me to do anything about it.
Amanda and I had previously dated a year or two ago and ended things because things were getting too stressful with high school and stuff that's not really relevant. The point is I haven't told her anything that's happening, because I don't know if I've really needed to. If I did I feel like she would push my to end contact which isn't something I really want to do, it's a sort of conflict of interest.
Ever since Jenny told me, the dynamic of our friendship has been changing. Talking is becoming more difficult, and when we do get to the subject of our situation it never really accomplishes anything, it usually ends with her feeling disappointed, as if she wanted something out of the conversation that she didn't get. I'm also afraid to take a break because she has anxiety and depression disorders and PTSD and I'm afraid for her welfare if I stop talking to her.
I suppose I just want everything to go back to normal but Jenny doesn't think that is possible. It's my opinion that feelings at this stage in our lives are temporary, but she feels that what she's feeling won't ever go away.
What am I even supposed to do in this situation? | Best friend confessed feelings for me, I am currently with someone and am not sure where to go from here. |
t3_fkygj | AskReddit | Reddit, how do I become a better biochemist/scientist?? | For the past 2 year of my life, I have been volunteering as a researcher in my school. I have put in a substantial amount of time learning and mastering protocols practiced in the field of biochemistry and have been mentored by what I honestly believe to be some of the world's best grad students/post docs/professors. I am seriously a hardworker and I try my best to not be lazy when it comes to science.
However, here lies my problem: A couple of days ago, one of my mentors was helping me trouble shoot an experiment, and in the process sort of gave me a very stern talk about how I needed to write in my lab notebook more, and how I needed to be more present in the lab (not as in my attendance, but as in my mind needed to be there while I was doing my work). The point of the talk was that I needed to be able to stand up on my own two feet and stop asking so many redundant questions that have been answered over a million times.
I agreed with what my mentor said and really, as much as I hated to admit it, my scientific method definitely needed improvement if I ever wanted to become a mature scientist. I have started to note down everything in my lab notebook, and am starting to be more attentive in lab. So, to gain more insight on the scientific method I am here, writing to you. Reddit, how do you approach science??? What are somethings you do to try and be more organized??? How have you perfected your laboratory skills? | I'm a beginner scientists and I need advice. What is your opinion about how a scientist should practice science? How does one keep everything organized, and thus, become a more productive scientist? |
t3_2wndou | relationships | I[19 M] have trouble getting over [19 F] crush, who has a boyfriend | Being so strongly attracted to someone rarely happens to me. The simple fact that I am posting here is baffling.
It wouldn't be such a problem, if I didn't have to see her every single day. She's part of my university course and I'll most definitely be seeing more of her the next 3 years.
We used to talk a lot during / after lectures or at least until I found out she had a boyfriend. I've been trying to distance myself from her as I'm not okay with just being friends.
I thought if I kept myself occupied I'd get over it quickly, but seeing her is making it so very difficult.
I went clubbing last night with my friends and it was all going great. But then I saw her with her boyfriend and it crushed me on the inside and I just felt like getting out, so I went home.
I have plenty of hobbies that keep me busy, but it doesn't help.
Other girls have expressed interest in me, but I don't care when all I want is to actually be with her. | See crush all the time, can't get over her. What the fuck do I do? I want to get on with my life, but no one else interests me the same way. |
t3_36vilg | relationships | I [23M] having trouble when I see my ex's [22F] car | So my ex and I broke up back in November. It was messy. Long story short she was doing a lot of crappy things to me behind my back and I didn't find out until after she broke up with me.
We dated for a long time so this whole proces has had a pretty big impact on me. One of my main problems is whenever I'm driving along and I see a red Kia Soul, my heart sinks. I start to have a mini panic attack and I can't figure out why.
Does this happen to anyone else? What's the best way to get over it? | Whenever I see the same car my ex has I get a big knot in my stomach and I don't know why or how to fix it. |
t3_f4gda | AskReddit | What US (preferably Texas) bank should I use? | Some history - I have two bank accounts. One is a Wells Fargo account that is a joint account with my wife. The second (Texans Credit Union) is my "fun money" account that gets a few hundred dollars every month. This is the account I use to go out to eat, go to the bar, take trips, etc.
But, Texans is starting to piss me off. They closed the branch nearest me and now the closest "free" ATM is 15 to 20 miles away...in the opposite direction of work, home, bars, etc. Now, I have to pay a fee for every transaction. Next, they changed their fee policy AND jacked my interest rate on my loan.
Anyway, I want to change banks and wanted some suggestions.
I will say that Bank of America is OUT. I had an account there when I was in the Military back in the 1980's and they screwed me out of thousands of dollars...to the point I had my car repossessed.
I haven't had any problems with Wells Fargo, but I would prefer my "fun" account be at a separate bank from my family account.
So...Any suggestion? | I need a new bank that won't fuck me over. |
t3_1akh3m | dating_advice | Help! I like this girl but don't know if she likes me/don't know what to do about it. | Before posting "ask her out," please read the post specifically because it's a little more complicated I think.
So here's the deal. Basically, I like this girl. We're both 16 and in high school. However, I only share one class with her and it isn't really possible to talk to her in it. So we have limited conversation randomly.
Here's the way the confusing part comes in. Sometimes we make quite a bit of eye contact in hallways and stuff and sometimes we don't. However, now I'm getting sick of it. The more I think about it, the more reasons I come up with to think that she doesn't like me. Also, she rarely initiates anything like texting or conversations when we can talk. She seems shy so I don't know if it's that or that she doesn't have any interest in me.
So at this point you're probably thinking, why don't you end the pain and ask her out already?
First of all, I don't even really know what that means. I don't know if asking someone out means asking them to be your girlfriend/boyfriend or if it means asking someone on a date. If it's the first, I want to get to know her more first. If it's the second, I have never seen anyone in our school (it's small) ask someone on a date. So I guess that's weird in High School?
Also, with eye contact and hallways, I'm starting to worry that if she doesn't like me, she probably thinks I'm creepy since I look at her a lot more in hallways. Maybe girls are generally sneakier about it? (At this point I'm trying to be obvious so maybe she'll initiate something or give me a sign that she likes me too.) | Can't tell if a girl likes me, and i'm getting sick of going back between thinking she does and she doesn't, but don't know what to do about it. |
t3_suspx | AskReddit | Teaching 3 sections of the same course (flavored by Game of Thrones, Hunger Games). Suggestions welcomed. | Okay Reddit, I'm teaching three courses next semester so I'm going to have each section reflect a different district/kingdom. They'll earn gold from tests and random bard encounters (i.e., I pose questions and if they get it correct, win additional gold). They'll be able to use this gold in a marketplace to buy weapons (family friendly such as banana peels, fly swatters, a dragon). All in preparation for an end semester battle (determined via power and a random number generator akin to the die in Risk). The victors get a huge party with awesome food. (There will be a smaller, sympathy party for the defeated too so no one is left out) That's my rough plan, but I'd love to hear what you would have liked had this been something that you encountered in college. | Three kingdoms (course sections) vying for supremacy; how to make it fun and unforgettable. |
t3_128m3d | AskReddit | What's the most fucked up dream you've ever had? | Here is mine.
So in my dream, the world was being slowly taken over by wild dinosaurs. The dinosaurs were running around eating people and pretty much causing a huge panic; and the only two people who could stop them were myself, and Adolf Hitler. Hitler and myself made our way to a gun store where we picked up assault rifles, sub machine guns, pistols, and I remembering grabbing what looked to be a M1 Garand. We were able to use Hitlers influence to get the guns for free because, hey, he is the fucking Fuhrer. After grabbing the guns we somehow were able to lasso two triceratops and after magically obtaining saddles for them, Hitler and myself proceeded to ride the triceratops around town while shooting the other dinosaurs that were eating people. After riding around town shooting dinosaurs, we came to this tall tower which kind of looked like the leaning tower of Pisa, but it was vertical with no lean to it. Hitler and myself climbed the tower while being chased by dinosaurs. When Hitler and myself reached the top of the tower, we proceed to snipe dinosaurs from the top of the tower. After firing hundreds of rounds and killing hundreds of dinosaurs, I woke up. | Dreamed town was attacked by dinosaurs, teamed up with Adolf Hitler, grabbed lots of guns, Hitler and myself rode dinosaurs while shooting wild dinosaurs. |
t3_1o0mkq | relationships | I [M/25] cannot tell the difference between when a girl is flirting or just being nice. Help | I'm sure it sounds stupid to most and the differences are pretty clear to you guys, but I just can't seem to do it. As you can imagine this has lead to several embarrassing situations, which just makes the problem worse. I've also had the reverse where apparently a girl was flirting, but I was so scared the girl was just being nice that I completely ignored it to avoid more potentially embarrassing moments.
The fact that I also have pretty intense social anxiety and am really self-conscious/ have low self-esteem make me cynical when it comes to girls. "Why would *she* be interested in me?" and in my own head I've proven time and time again that I was right and that super hot girl was not at all interested in me.
So besides the obvious need of trying to improve my self-esteem, what can I do to help distinguish between a girl that is being nice and girl that is trying to hint that she is interested? | Can't tell if a girl is just being friendly or if she is romantically interested. Please help... |
t3_2b2ngk | relationships | Me [24 M] with my FWB [24 F] 3 months-sh, need some outside insight into behavior | So I guess most of the pertinent 'relationship' details are in the title. She has been my friend since freshman year of college. I think I'm just going to jump into the question and then add details via edits or comments based on what people think they need.
She recently asked to take a day off work since she is house sitting for a week which I am more than happy to do. But she also asked me to go on her family's vacation with her which seems very anti-FWBish.
So I think she's wanting more, and while I'm somewhere in the middle of what I want, I at least want to talk about with her to make sure we're on the same page before something awkward happens on her family vacation.
I had plans last night to meet her for some drinks which was a perfect opportunity to bring this up. So she texted me around the arranged time and I texted her back and then didn't hear anything for two-ish hours. When I heard from her again, she apologized and said that her phone has been having service problems with sending and receiving texts all day. Texting since then has spotty, but not negative or overall different.
This seems fishy in today's world, but it's also a pretty a paper-thin excuse so I'm inclined to believe it. Plus, our plans RE: house sitting and vacation are still on.
Should I continue as planned? I think I'm just looking for general insights and opinions. | FWB invites me on family vacation which seems to be a signal she wants more. I'm on the fence. Some odd behavior last night. Want some general insights. |
t3_2yhvaq | tifu | TIFU by wearing a shirt covered in my own splooge | Yes, this was in fact today. Back story time!
I'm a lonely enlisted member of the U.S. military and I am currently deployed. Under these circumstances ofcourse I take every opportunity I get to burp my worm. This happens in one of two ways. Either while showering I'll do my part in donating to the drain baby collection of my fellow brothers (always wear your shower shoes kids!) or when I am ever alone in my room I can get comfy and enjoy my favorite hobby since I was ten years old like it was intended. Now the clean up... this is where I fucked up. I had decided to use one of my shirts I use for going to the gym as my splooge towel and change it out every few days.
So, today I wake up pretty late and have to rush to get my stuff packed and head to work. My routine is always the same, grab my pt gear, physical training, shove it in my backpack, and go. Without thinking I grab that used splooge towel shirt and head off. Now my twelve hour shift is over, get changed for the gym and meet up with the six guys I go with and immediately I become the highlight of the fucking deployment. I finally notice and it could not have been anymore obvious. About 6 nice big ejaculate stains from my sleeves, chest, back and stomach. Something is wrong with me, so I'm not even really embarrassed and just laugh with them and go change my shirt and finish the workout like a champion. | Burped my worm multiple times into my workout shirt. Wore this shirt to the gym with my six buddies. I'll never live this down. |
t3_3ttbo6 | relationships | Extremely jealous of my [23M] gf [21F] and her studying abroad adventures; beginning to lose excitement for her return. | My gf has been abroad since August, and that is when I started my big boy job (graduated w/ Mech.E this past June). Coupled with all the stress/anxiety/depression that typically follows college-to-real world transition, I have been getting extremely jealous of her adventures and experiences. One of the purposes of a relationship is to create and share memories together, so knowing that she's making some of the best memories of her life without me cuts DEEP, to say the least. She'll text me about all of the wonderful adventures she had that day and the places she went/things she saw; while I try my very best to act excited and happy for her, I'll be FULL of jealousy, bitterness and even anger. Angry that she decided to go on this adventure without me because in my mind I would have never done the same (which is totally not true because I was abroad 2 years ago). I know that I'm being selfish and bitter, but honestly cannot control it.
It's getting to a point where the jealousy is overshadowing my excitement for her to get home. I'm finding that I am extremely annoyed with her when we talk, am losing interest in talking to her but feel obligated to because I know you need that comfort when you're abroad, and am losing excitement for her to come home because I know alllll she will do is talk about her adventures and experiences, while all I will do is remind myself that she did all of this without me. | my gf has been abroad for months and I've been getting increasinly jealous to the point where I'm no longer excited for her to come home. |
t3_gc4ib | AskReddit | Next door neighbors break up, contemplating involvement. Should I? | Short story: Boyfriend and girlfriend couple next door. Don't know them, never hung out with them, and never spoke to them except polite "hi's" on the property. Last thursday I see them at a bar I always go to and I buy them both a lot of shots.
Last night I go back to the same bar and only she is there with a bunch of friends. We were talking and she asked that if I saw him, would I tell him that she loves him and misses him and blah blah blah. I asked her if she wanted me to go there and tell him, and she said "no" in a "no means yes" kind of way.
I'm awkward when it comes to this sort of thing so I don't know what I should do. I don't think it would do any harm if I went over but it's none of my business to begin with and it may seem a little weird. | next door neighbors whom i don't know broke up, wondering if i should tell the dude his girl misses him |
t3_4995s0 | relationships | Me [24M] and my friend [24F] of 5 months, her Hodgkin's is Stage II and unresponsive to treatments. Unsure how to help and guilty about not showing support recently. | A while ago I posted on how I befriended someone with cancer. At the time I thought their cancer was pretty easily treatable, but as time went on it turned out they're one of the rare cases where the treatments aren't working for her.
I've gotten busy with school and we'd get dinner and hang out to do painting, but these days I haven't been able to offer support. I check in with her now boyfriend and friends to see how she's doing and she seems like a pretty big mess due to the grim updates she's been getting on her results. Honestly, I know that it'll reach palliative care and she'll probably pass away within the year. I text her every now and then to offer support and I know she likes having any sort of company even if it's a stranger in a coffee shop. I just don't have that much time anymore to go out of my way to hang out.
I have a major exam, have to remediate a class in a couple weeks and I've been dealing with internal issues such as depression pretty badly for the past few months. I see her posting on facebook along with others mentioning how she has to get checked into urgent care and I feel bad that I'm just sitting in a library studying or at home.
How do you deal with knowing that someone you're friends with will most likely die but you have a fair amount of issues on your own plate? | Friend has cancer and is probably terminal within the year. I have my own issues but I feel bad that I'm not offering support. |
t3_1ound2 | relationships | Me [25 M] with my Ex [25 F] broke up after 4 years, messed up getting back with her | After 4 years, 1,5 of that as LDR, my GF broke up with me. It was my first breakup ever, and I was pretty much over it, so I thought. This was mainly because our contact was still similar to "pre-breakup" times.
Then, 1,5 months later, she came back to me, saying how she misses me and that she wants to be with me again. In some arrogant ass-attitude of mine, I more or less simply ignored it/ did not take it seriously. Two weeks later, when I slowly realised what I did, she said she does not feel like that anymore. But we continue to have good contact.
Fast forward half a year. Contact dropped to minimum due her having an affair, which did not work out. I'm in her town for a wedding (not hers), when I end up helping her through a spontaneous abortion. In the aftermath of these events, she tells me that she loves me and I'm the most important person in her life.
For three weeks, everything is back in relationship mode. Then she starts blocking contact und refusing any visits, while still casually writing that she misses me.
That is 4 months ago. Now, she has a new BF. Since I know that, I am hating myself for not taking her seriously when she wanted to come back to me. I feel like it was the biggest mistake in my life and I can't understand how I could ignore her like that. | She wanted to come back to me; I messed it up und hate myself for that. |
t3_3ekbxe | relationships | I[27F] am horrified at what I am becoming. Please help. | I am in a relationship with a guy[28M] for 1 year now. It recently changed from a long distance one to moving in together. This coincides with him falling sick and getting on medications which prohibit alcohol. (This is important later)
Before, he used to be the life of the party. He used to be the centre of attraction. Now due to the medications, he avoids parties and his circle of friends with whom he used to go drink. Now his friends believe I am the reason why he has changed. All of them have been blaming me and saying things behind my back. I can/will not tell them about the medications. But this back bitching about me hurts me somewhat. I have never stopped my SO from partying or going out with his friends. Infact, usually, I used to encourage it.
Now, due to him spending all of his time with me, I have become somewhat accustomed to his presence in my life. I have started becoming suspicious of his friends. I have started checking his phone and messages. I have started resenting him for leaving me home when he goes somewhere. I have been angry and jealous all this while. I was never like this before. I basically need to grab him close and keep him there. This thought horrifies me as I was never a clinger. I never want a relationship where I want all of his time. This is the first time in my life I am feeling jealous, angry and clinging.
Please someone help me as to how to get over these feelings. | please help me avoid becoming a suspicious clinger in my relationship. |
t3_2ft7h4 | relationships | Update: I [20M] ended it with my girlfriend [21F] last night. | [Previous Post] (
So last night I told her I didn't want to keep trying to make this work because ultimately, I didn't think I'd be able to get over what she did. When I told her she said she doesn't see any more reason to live and just walked out of my apartment, didn't take her phone, keys, nothing. I got worried and called 911. She's now in the hospital pending a psych evaluation for possible depression.
I was there with her last night for support but when they said I had to leave she told me to "have a nice life," and I left the hospital. She refused to let her parents know she's in the hospital and told me not to tell anyone, but I told her best friend. I needed to tell someone because I didn't want to be the only person who knew, especially since I am no longer willing to be romantically involved with her. She currently isn't allowed to have visitors.
Should I visit? Should I try to keep contact with her? I would just like to know she's ok and that she'll be able to move on with her life. | Broke up with girlfriend for good, she walked out and I thought she'd hurt herself so now she's in the hospital for psych evaluation. Should I visit or keep contact with her? |
t3_50h6qc | relationships | Friends rude Ex-girlfriend [22/F] still coming over. How do I politely uninvite her? | Our good friend [28/M, 8 year friendship] started dating a girl [22/F] and we started watching GoT with them since she had never seen it. She loved it, but I have not enjoyed her. She is what I consider to be rude. We are a frugal family so I usually cook dinner. She has never once offered to help cook or clean up. She is always the first to grab her dinner and she is usually almost done with her dinner before everyone else has even sat down to start eating. She drinks our alcohol and never brings any to share. Again frugal family. She even poured out an entire glass of wine that she asked for, no reason given. It was the last of the wine and I could have enjoyed it instead of offering it to the guest, which is the polite thing to do. Part way through season 2 they broke up. They are still trying to be friends so she has kept coming over for GoT night. I was hoping her behavior would be better, but her behavior has only gotten worse. She is always very excited to plan the next time to come over, but I do not want her over any longer. I was raised as a very courteous southern lady, who even when mad/annoyed I just grin and bear it. I was hoping that I could make it through the series, but I am not going to be able to. I've never had to ask someone to not come to my house again. My husband says that she is rude and we shouldn't worry about being polite, but I don't like being rude even in cases like this. (Myself [30/F], Husband [31/M]) I'm sure I'm overreacting, but this is really grating on me. How do I politely rescind her invitation to my home? | Rude person keeps coming over. How do I politely uninvite? |
t3_1xytpg | relationships | I[16 M] was mislead by a girl [16 F]. Now my old friend [16 M] is in the same situation. | Over a month or so ago my sister introduced me to a friend of hers. We flirted a little and I asked her out. She agreed then never responded to my text asking what she thought of the plans I had made. We didn't go out and we haven't talked about it since. I see her regularly when she spends time with my sister. I recently discovered that an old friend of mine is also falling for her. Today he gave her flowers, chocolates, a teddy bear, and starbucks. She accepted, but openly admitted to me that she has no feelings for him. When she asked for my advice I said to be honest with him. She said she, "Has no emotions." and "Hates being honest with people." I don't want my old buddy to get hurt in the same way. My only concern is if it's any of my business to tell him. By old friend I mean we've known each other since kindergarten. We used to spend almost every day together at school and after. We grew apart about 3-4 years ago. | Should I tell my old friend he is falling for a complete cunt? |
t3_4j7ozx | relationships | I [23f] feel really alone even when my husband [22] is around | We've been married for a year next month, and have had some struggles for the past couple of months.
Mostly, anymore, I feel like he is absolutely addicted to his phone. He uses it a lot for as a means of communication with coworkers and work email, he also uses it a lot at work in his downtime. For him, his phone is a means of distraction and decompression after a long day.
Anymore though, it's hard to get him off of it. Every time he picks it up I can't help but get frustrated. He hardly texts me while he's at work anymore, while I know he gets on it, uses social media, talks to others.
I try to be accepting of the fact that it, and sometimes video games are things he needs to relax sometimes. But it's gotten to the point where I feel like he hardly pays me any attention, and is more enveloped in his phone/ online worlds. It's frustrating for me. I love him, but I feel so alone, even when he's home.
We are both sort of the anti-social type. He just isn't that into it, and I am cripplingly shy. I work, but wouldn't ever meet up with or hang out with anyone from there outside of work. I barely even talk to anyone there anyway, there are a lot of differences.
We don't really go out much either, a date night every paycheck typically. He's on his phone for a good chunk of it though. And the last time, it was difficult to even find a topic of conversation. It's hard to even get him to go out and go grocery shopping with me. I don't drive myself, so going out is somewhat difficult.
I've suggested we do something like join groups on Meet Up. We've skimmed the local groups, but never made an account or tried to go to anything.
I know he's really stressed at work right now, and has been for a couple of months. He's got a lot going on. But, it's difficult. I am progressively feeling more alone and depressed. I'm not really sure what to do. | Husband doesn't like going out and doing things/ socializing, we don't have friends, he's kind of addicted to his phone. I'm feeling alone and don't know what to do any more. |
t3_3ytgeh | tifu | TIFU By telling my girlfriend about my past experience with roadhead | This happened last night by the way. So my girlfriend and I have been together for about 2 weeks now and she isn't too fond of me talking about any of my past ex-girlfriends or even mentioning them in the slightest. Well last night we were running some errands and when we got in the car she hinted at giving me roadhead. Well of course my brain being the scumbag it is decides it's time to ruin my chances of any kind of sexual activity that night. She asks me if i'll be fine to drive while she performs and my answer was this: "Yeah I'll be fine, it wouldn't be my first time." Mood=killed. Needless to say she wasn't too happy and I got no action that night. | Told my girlfriend who hates my ex-girlfriends that I would be fine with her giving me roadhead because it wouldn't be my first experience. |
t3_423gfo | tifu | TIFU by trying to talk to my dumbass brother | So this fuck up just really settled in about 15 minutes ago so it's pretty fresh.
I'll try to keep it short.
A little background information.
I live with my parents and my idiot older brother, who just recently got kicked out for being a lazy ass and doing nothing but smoking weed and sleeping with his ratchet little girlfriend.
Well yesterday I get this phone call from a drug dealer informing me that brother owes him 5 grand. Great. All I can really do is tell this guy that I'll try to get ahold of him. But my asshole sibling won't answer texts or call still.
I have no idea what to do. Great.
But then this morning I have this brilliant idea.
I'll download all the contacts from our iCloud and call his girlfriend. Perfect.
Whelp not really. Turns out my parents contacts were synced too. Now I have like 5 years of contacts from my mom and dad. Great.
So I sift through my newfound clusterfuck of phone numbers and find his girlfriend.
I call the bitch. No answer. Call again. No answer. God dammit. Whelp better start the extensive task of deleting worthless contacts. It turns out that shit takes forever. Well I find out that there's an app that lets you delete multiple contacts at the same time. Hell yeah. My shit is back to normal and now I possibly have a way to get ahold of my brother.
Fast forward 3 hours. My mom gets home from work and asks if I changed any settings on our Apple account. I say no and ask why.
"Well I have none of my contacts. All of my clients numbers are gone and I can't get them back on my phone for some reason."
My stomach drops. I deleted like 300+ contacts... Trying to act not guilty, I tell her to let me fix it. Nope. That sketchy app permanently trashed all my parents phone numbers and I still haven't heard from my idiot brother. | I tried to get a phone number. Deleted everyone's phone numbers... |
t3_1wxzuo | offmychest | Why aren't you my friend any more? | That is what you, my sister, would like to know. So, here is the answer.
First off, because I do not like when someone insults me, my husband, and my parenting style. I do not like when you make ASSumptions about my life and my relationship with my parents. I do not like when you text me at 2am listing every thing I have ever done to offend you and then the next day act like nothing happened. That is called being fake and I do not play that game.
Now that I've made that clear, there is more. You have made it increasingly clear that you do not enjoy my company. It is as if my very presence offends you. I cannot think of a time in the past two years that we have spent time together that you did not take something I said or did offensively and try to start a petty fight. You seem to be searching for flaws and failures in me. Taking minor things and blowing them up into major issues. I am a person who makes mistakes, which I can admit. I cannot spend my time concerning myself with worrying about you delicate feelings, while you do not hesitate to stomp all over mine every chance you get. I recognize this for what it is. You are jealous. I do not know what you are jealous of, since you have a successful career, a seemingly happy marriage, and plenty of money. But, I have experienced this kind of toxic jealousy before in myself and I know I want nothing to do with it. You are an outwardly attractive person but jealousy is ugly on you.
You are 34 years old, but less mature than my husband's 17 year old niece. Until you can grow up, I do not want you to have any part of my or my son's life. | Bitch, grow the fuck up. |
t3_jv6r1 | AskReddit | My clothes smell like skunk! Need help! | Earlier this week, my roommate found a rag in the kitchen that reeked of skunk, but we are still unsure what exactly it's from. Anyway, he first tried to wash it out with Dawn, and then put it in the dryer. It still smelled, and also made the dryer stink of it. When I did whites last night, he threw the rag in, and now all my whites smell slightly of skunk. I've tried washing them around 5 times, putting in extra soap in the washer and 3 sheets of Gain in the dryer. Does anybody know what I can do to get the smell out? | My roommate threw a skunk rag in with my clothes and now my clothes smell. Help. |
t3_27s6b9 | relationships | My [30 F] gf brokeup with Me [32 M] 1 month ago. She contacted first. We met and it feels like she brokeup with me again! | OK, ill keep it short, cause I need some quick points of view from you people..
We were together for 1.5year. 7months in the relationship we started having bad fights. Mostly my fault. After some months of having pretty constant fighs (maybe like every 2 weeks) she brokeup with me cause she 'couldnt take it anymore'.
So we stop contact for 1 month. After which she calls me. We chat a bit and arrange to meet.
We met yesterday and after chatting very nicely with laughs etc She brought up all our issues..everything that bothered her etc. She crusified me again.
So...What does she want?? She told me she shouldnt have agreed to meet me cause it makes it more dificult for her..but SHE contacted me.
Seriously i dont know what to do..try to fix it? or let her relax more and see... | gf brokeup with me, contacted me after month, met and she still blames me on everything. what does she want? |
t3_309brk | tifu | TIFU(BNRBEWF) | TIFU(BNRBEWS)
This was a few months ago, enjoy!
I went to the shop (around 10am) to buy an energy drink, and there was two guys in there buying lager (never to early to get drunk apparently), after looking at me the fatter one who I shall refer to as shitbrain began trying to get me to buy his Iphone for 5 pounds, obviously a trick, or a very good deal (it was a trick, and no I didnt fall for it) they began to leave after paying the guy at the till but not before hurling insults at me, so I gave the the "stare of death" at which the skinnier one "Carling Carlson" began to stare back leaning in until he was an inch away from my face he began saying in a drunklen slur "dont...hic...dont stare at...hic...stare at me, urp" so I keep staring, his rebuttle consisted of "I'll, urf, i'll batter you and, and, and, hic, your, err, dad" I continue stare him straight in the eyes, at this point he decides to put and end to this game of dont blink by launching his rather thick skull at my own valuable head, a dull "thunk" told him he had met his mark, and he recoiled backwards stumbling a little, expecting me to now look away he was very dissapointed in hos abilities when I continue to look him in the eye, confused, concussed and coming to the conclusion that he had cocked up, carling and shitbrain left, I paid for my drink, bought a lollipop and went home, all that just for a drink. | Drunk people are Nightkin. |
t3_2vndok | tifu | TIFU by making a bad 'yo momma' joke | Technically this isn't TODAY I fucked up, but eh, it happens.
This happened when I was in middle school. I was a much different kid back then; I had next to no friends and got all of my jokes from the popular crowd at that time, for example, your momma jokes.
Before I can tell the rest, I need to tell you about a kid in my class. About a month ago his mother suddenly died. Not from an accident, but from a rare disease. I used to be friends with him a while ago, but we slowly drifted apart after the death.
Anyway, it was gym class, and 7th grade me had to shit. Again. I went into the the stall and heard someone open the door. A voice said "Is there anybody in here?" In a mildly sarcastic voice. Out of instinct, I said "Yo Momma". Then, realizing my fault. I started apologizing, but the door slammed and I knew that my relations with that guy were now worth as much as what I was now wiping out of my ass. | I told a terrible 'Yo Momma' joke to a kid who just lost his mother. |
t3_1y4a7v | personalfinance | 26yr old with 0 debt & very little expenses. Looking for suggestions on what to do with the money. | **Background**
I am a 26 yr old who has just entered into the work force about a yr 1/2 ago. I currently work as a gov consultant in an industry that is around 100% travel. I make around 52k a year, depending on workable hours and project stage (OT eligible). I currently have finished paying off student loans with what I made last year. Addionally, my monthly expenses are usually around $218/month (2 gym memberships & health insurance). My laundry, gas, rental car, and hotel is paid for on the road in addition to perdiem & the weekend a month i go home I stay at either my parents or my girlfriends. Therefore my paycheck (after fed & 3 state taxes) is all "take home". My goal is to have $40-50k in my account by July and to then find a new job.
**The Question**
What should I be doing with this money that I am currently putting into savings? I am looking for something that has high returns OVER TIME and plan to use MOST of this money to get more $. What would you suggest that is both safe and over time, lucrative? | I have a job that allows me to pocket all the $ and I have almost 0 expenses/debt. How can I use the money to make more $ over time? |
t3_52xvm2 | legaladvice | [NH] Bought a vehicle in a Private Sale. Seller was not legal owner. What can I do next? | My girlfriend's friend's stepfather was selling a 2002 motorcycle. She showed me the ad, I went to buy it. We agreed on price and he furnished me a Bill of Sale, as well as the old registration. This is the first time i had ever bought a vehicle in a private sale, and it was somewhat impulsive.
I was also under the misconception that anything with 12+ years did not need a title. So I went on my merry way. Tried to register it the next day and found out it was 15+ years.
The private seller told me that he was requesting a duplicate title after I left him know. Three weeks later he said he is still waiting for it. I contacted the DMV and said that there has been no activity, and that the seller was no longer the legal owner. He mentioned that he let a friend ride it in 2015. I am assuming he signed it over to him and never got it back.
What can I do? Can I call the police since he sold a vehicle that he isn't the owner of? Can I sue him in civil court to try and get my money back?
I am in the process of trying to get a bonded title through the DMV now, but I am not sure if they will approve or not.
I certainly learned my lesson for all future sales, but this really sucks. Hoping someone can point me in the right direction. | Bought a motorcycle from someone who isn't the legal owner. Can't register. What now? |
t3_10dpmm | relationships | [20F] I don't know if it's the right time to tell my boyfriend [20M] that I love him. 6 months | I am 20 years old and have been dating this amazing guy for about 6 months. Everything is going so well with him. We do fight sometimes, but it's always about stupid things, and we make up in the end, because we have such a strong foundation. He knows that I will tell him if anything is wrong, and vice versa. There is solid communication and we always have fun with each other, and have a wonderful sex life. Both of our parents approve of us and our friends like us together. I've honestly never felt happier with a boyfriend.
However, in the past I told an ex boyfriend that I loved him a month into the relationship, because I was 15 and stupid, and I am a hopeless romantic, and that relationship just went to hell, but they were for reasons outside of our control. I just don't want to move into things too quickly. I feel things are different with this guy, but I think I've said these things before about past boyfriends. I also don't want to scare him off. I know I'm young, but I really do think he is marriage material. He's everything I could ever want. I'm not saying I want to marry him right now, but in about 3-4 years, I could see myself still with him.
Another thing to add is that he doesn't really like to initiate things. He's not the type of guy to take charge or command of things, which might be why he hasn't said anything to me, or I might just be hoping that. I dunno.
That being said, I feel the next step into our relationship would be to tell him how I feel, but I'm scared it'll ruin things, and that's the last thing I want. Is this the right time? Or am I being blinded by rose colored glasses? | I am 99% sure I love my boyfriend, but I don't know if I should tell him, because that might be moving too fast and might ruin the relationship. |
t3_b8z0x | AskReddit | In two months I will be stranding myself on a deserted tropical island for 6 weeks. Hoping Reddit can help me out with some survival tips/advice. | Hey guys, this is my first post so I have no idea which subreddit this should be under, sorry if this isn't it. Here's the deal.
In a couple of months I will be stranding myself on a tropical island in Central America for 6 weeks with the clothes on my back, two knives, a polespear, goggles, and a last resort emergency kit. I will be completely isolated with no chance of liberation and a boat scheduled to pick me up on the morning of my final day. I have already begun the lengthy process of modifying my diet, getting in shape, and reading up on the survival stuff that comes to mind (traps, fire, shelter construction, knots, edible flora/fauna, etc...), but I don't think my brain alone can best prepare me.
So I look to you, you handsome sages of the internet, to help me prepare myself for this physical and mental test in these final weeks.
If you have **ANY** suggestions/advice, links to pertinent information, or even some bad-ass stories or personal experiences, I'd love to hear it all. Thanks for the help.
Seducifer | Looking for survival help for tropical island adventure! |
t3_1ay6g9 | tifu | TIFU Gotta have my Pops | I've had a runny nose for the past 2 days. No problem. Just use a whole bunch of tissues.
Until tonight.
I really wanted some Pops because I was hungry and nothing else caught my eye, so I ate a bowl of milk and the cereal.
I was laying in bed, trying to fall asleep when I shifted a bit. Bad move. I start coughing ( I have a very weird dry cough so it feels like a lion's scraping the inside of my chest.) I think it will pass, but I keep coughing. Like a car crash happening in slow motion, I realized I was going to throw up. I turn on the light, start leaving my room, but my stomach can't wait to make it to the toilet. I start barfing in the hallway, and put my hand up to my chin, catching all of my half digested pops and goo in my hand. I bolt to the toilet and start letting it out, using my good hand to hold my hair back.
You never feel truly vulnerable until you are barfing up everything you've eaten in the last 6 hours with no way to call for help.
I managed to finally stop when the cupcake I'd eaten started to make an appearance, and cleaned myself up. I am writing this until I feel safe enough to go back to bed. | Don't drink milk when you have bad lungs, or you will end up like the dumbass I am. |
t3_1ympda | relationships | Im a 32 y.o male with a girlfriend who is 28. We have been seeing each other for about a month and IDK what to do... | Well Ill try to keep it short. I have been seeing this girl for about a month and a half now and our conversations and hangouts are fun. The problem is she always seems to put me on behind everything else. She goes out drinking the night before with her "friends" and then cancels the date or shows up and acts tired and doesn't want to drink. I also end up paying for the entirety of the dates and have to do all the planning and traveling to her etc... To top it all off she we haven't done anymore than make out in a bar a couple times after which she just runs off back home.
With that as a background, am I an idiot for sticking this out? I look forward to the dates and I sure haven't canceled or shown up half an hour late. And I wouldn't mind paying for everything if she at least offered to split some of it but she doesn't even do that. And after being in a sexless relationship in the past I don't want to get involved with that again. So should I just cut my losses and look elsewhere or is it too soon to know. | How long would you wait before splitting a check or sleeping with a guy you actually like? |
t3_16fehm | AskReddit | Can Reddit help send my bud to space? | AXE is holding a contest to send someone to space. Currently, the top 2 positions are people who are there because of their costumes. My friend Steve Deku is in third. He has been a space enthusiast for a long time and going to space has been a dream of his from a young age. I have seen Reddit do some incredible things and I am hoping that we will be able to send a man to space because he truly desires to go, as opposed to the first and second place who think they should go because they are wearing costumes in their picture (that they won't be able to wear in space). This is a chance to help someone accomplish his dream.
All you have to do is follow the link and vote for Steve Deku. It would be greatly appreciated. Thanks Reddit! Every vote counts. | Click on the link and vote for Steve Deku to send an awesome guy who deserves it to space. |
t3_2omma7 | tifu | TIFU by missing two final exams in my last semester while studying abroad. | I'm spending my final semester at a foreign university. In my home university we would have one exam week after our final week of classes. I figured exams wouldn't be starting here for another week because I knew the exam period *ends* in two weeks (because my current visa expires then). I only knew that one of my exams was in a week. For some foolish reason I never thought to check how long exam period is at my exchange school, but apparently it is over two weeks.
This Saturday I'm making a grocery list on my notepad, and I decide to look up my exams and write them down to prioritize which ones to study for first. Turns out I had one that morning, and another the previous day. Without these two classes I do not get my degree.
Normally, this would just delay my graduation another semester, but I have already spent $1000 to obtain a one-year work visa to stay in this foreign country starting next month, and its conditions will not allow me to attend university. If I cannot somehow make up these exams, I will have to choose between forfeiting my work visa or delaying my degree 18 months. Since my degree is nearly worthless to employers anyway, I am going with the latter.
I have certainly fucked up, and it all could have been avoided had I written down those dates a week beforehand. I will facepalm eternally for this. | I missed two exams because I didn't think to check when the exam period started in a new country, assuming it was the same duration as my old country. I either delay my graduation by 18 months or forfeit my work visa to stay in my new country, and I'm doing the former. |
t3_4epm1n | tifu | TIFU by microwaving a pie | So i was home alone and feeling quite hungry so i went to the fridge to get something to eat and see a small apple pie in the freezer so i put it in the microwave, set ti for 30 seconds and wait. 15 seconds in and i see sparks flying in the microwave and this terrible burning smell starts coming from the microwave. I sprint over to the microwave and open it and the microwave shuts off completely. I look in the microwave to see a burnt apple pie and burnt sides of the microwave. I stare in shock as my brain as i realise my mistake. I look at the pie to confirm the worst. Aluminium foil surrounding the pie. Reddit, I am an Idiot. | tried to microwave a pie, broke the microwave, realised the aluminium foil was still on it. |
t3_54ll4b | relationships | Me [20 F] had an amazing date (and sex) with guy [20 M] but now things are awkward? | We met on tinder about two weeks ago. We hit it off and had some great conversations. It got to the point where we would stay up late into the night talking, and then we would spend all day snapchatting each other.
I told him I wanted something casual, and he initially said he wanted something serious. He told me he was completely fine with being casual though and decided to set up a date.
He drove an hour to see me and pulled out all the stops. He was a really nice, sweet guy and we got along super well. When he took me out to dinner we barely touched our food because we were so busy talking.
Not to mention we were both incredibly attracted to each other. One thing led to another and we had sex multiple times. We were completely comfortable with each other and it was a really great date for both of us. We literally stared into each others eyes while he told me how perfect and beautiful I was.
And now it is really awkward and I don't really know why. Our conversations have kinda come to a lull and I don't know what to talk to him about. He initiates conversations, like he wants to talk to me, it just doesn't go anywhere. And then I get awkward and say something stupid, which then makes things more awkward.
I don't really understand why it's so weird when things went so well. I also don't know what to do about it to fix it. Personally, I am more straight forward and would like to just call him and ask if we are good and probably make jokes about the awkwardness to relieve the tension. But I also don't want to make things worse.
I like this guy, and would like to try to work this out but I'm not sure what to do. | I had a great date with a guy who was just as into me as I was into him. Things are different after we had sex and this date. Why are things awkward when we talk now and what can I do to fix it? |
t3_vxfdr | AskReddit | Reddit, what do I do with my life, now that I have ruined it? | So here is the back story -
Up until 2 months ago, I had a really cushy job, made great money and really liked what I did. However, I was living with an opiate/heroin addiction that was getting worse and worse by the day. It finally got really bad and I ended up getting arrested with an assortment of drugs on me and since the amount was above a certain threshold, the police charged me with intent to distribute.
My car was seized, and since it was financed, repossessed and my credit score is destroyed. I lost my job because the police sent my work laptop to my job directly instead of letting me get it. Once my work got my laptop from the prosecutor's office, they knew that my story of "losing" it at a restaurant was bogus and fired me on the spot. Anyways, all of the legal stuff has played out and I was convicted of 2 "failure to turnover controlled dangerous substance" charges (In NJ this is a misdemeanor and is less than an actual possession charge, but it is still bad).
Anyways, this was 4 months ago, I have since been to rehab, and am still in outpatient therapy twice a week and have been clean since my arrest (150 days today). Now I can't get a job, I can't get a loan, I can't go back to school and put myself into more debt since this will be on my record for 5 years at least. I don't know what to do - can you please help me? | drugs are bad mmmkay - I lost my job, my credit score, my car, my clean record and I don;t know what to do now. |
t3_2bp8cz | tifu | TIFU by buying a stolen phone. | Note: This didn't have in the US, nor in any English speaking country
So I just graduated from high school and was looking to buy a smartphone for college, I was looking on a eBay like website for my country and found a LG G2 for 330€ ($445)
I have saved some money from my last graphic design job so I thought what could go wrong? Well everything went wrong
I contacted ShitHead (the seller) and shithead told me its unused and bought in Germany. I've told shithead to meet me at a pub and we talked a bit, he showed me the phone and everything went okay. I gave him the 300€ and he gave me the brand new LG G2. It looked legit as it was unused and no sign of it being used!
____
**Two months later**
I live with my parents, and while I was playing clash of clans on my g2 the bell rings, there they are! The COPS, I'm getting arrested for stealing a phone. I've told them the story but they didn't seem to care, they told me that the phone I was using was stolen on 6th May and they had the IMEI codes but couldn't locate it because It wasn't turned or connected to a sim card. When I put my sim card in the phone they got signal and recorded EVERY Message, Phone Call, Email, Browser history.... EVERYTHING!!
The reason they waited so long to arrest me that they thought I was connected with the wire that stole all the phones from Germany
They told me to call ShitHead (the seller), his phone wasn't turned on. So they took my phone and told me that they will get in touch with me tomorrow
Now here I am, lost 445$, without a phone and maybe I will get arrested and charged for stealing a phone | Bought a stolen phone from shithead and probably gonna get charged for theft |
t3_53dc1o | relationships | My son (14/M) has constant worries about school shootings and nightmares about it. We don't know how to help him. | For the past month or so my son has become obsessed with school shootings, reading online news stories about them, talking about them, he's even told me "I'm going to die in a school shooting at some point this year or next year, I know it" and my husband is worried about our son. He constantly tells us of nightmares he has of himself dying in a school shooting with boys laughing at him and other pupils.
He spends hours researching about school shootings and the causes of it, reads about Columbine and Sandy Hook obsessively and keeps worrying about a school shooting happening in the next few weeks or months.
Our son seems low, has started over-eating, and is obsessed with Skittles (he ate about nine packets as a means of coping). He's also given up on a lot of his favorite hobbies; weightlifting, cookery, dance class (the dances as in Dancing with the Stars) and seeing friends.
My son **does not want to carry out a school shooting**, but has premonitions about himself being a victim of one, and wakes up screaming almost every night, having nightmares about it.
He told me how two boys in school keep harassing him for pictures of himself wearing panties, he's told them no and tried ignoring them, but they said "You fucking will wear panties, you little nerd, you look fucking good in panties and a skirt, so wear them or go to hell, fucker.".
My son is quiet, and has few friends, he's also 6ft tall and fairly brawny in build, looks like a jock stereotype but is far from it in personality terms.
He constantly has these worries and it's causing me and my dad upset, how do we cope with things?
BTW my son is an only child. | My son is obsessed with school shootings and has nightmares over it. |
t3_v2hr6 | AskReddit | Reddit, what is something seemingly casual someone has done for you made you fall in love? | We were having a work party and we are all quite young and I found myself down the street in some random park taking care of my boss as he vomited on himself. As I came back to the club we were at I walked up to one of the guys gave him a friendly hit on the chest and told him to meet me at the bar to get a drink. Apparently I was significantly more drunk then I thought because what actually happened was this~ I walked up and gave him a friendly hit on the chest, totally interrupting a girl mid sentence who was talking to him. They had just danced for over and hour and he had bought her a drink, then I swooped in told him to meet me at the bar and he immediately told her he had to go. I proceeded to buy a drink and spill it all over him with my hand jester story telling then told him I wanted to dance and left him, who happily waited for me to finish getting my dance on and take my drunk ass home. | Got outrageously drunk and cock blocked someone who was more then willing to take care of me instead. I took it to heart in the best of ways. |
t3_402f53 | relationships | 21 and 20 yr old F. Am I setting up to get stabbed in the back? | We're both college students who became friends over a summer job. She shared with me very quickly that her parents were abusive and she is making her own living.
She has stated before that she absolutely does not put up with people talking shit to her friends. Four months down the line I'm getting referred to as "one of her closest friends" while she starts talks rather harshly about her past best friend. In fact, she does this about the majority of her previous friends and even about some current ones (my roommate).
She has also expressed to me that some of her friendships were made for the purpose of favors, such as that with an older student who is responsible for hiring us. I have also seen her become excessively friendly with people she hates and I won't realize she hates them until she does something like encouraging that person to apply for our job and then telling the student employer to ignore his application.
Our relationship is based on her personal organization of hangouts. It does not seem to work the other way around. However, the fact that she's putting aside time to hang out with me seems to show that I'm genuinely on her good side. | friend is showing hypocritical behavior. How badly do you think I could get burned? |
t3_uxw25 | AskReddit | The agency fucked me! What do? | So, I went to an interview at ClientCompany, after Agency dropped me an email and arranged for me to head over. So I did.
The interview was stellar, and they basically said I had the job, and they were going to arrange with Agency to start ASAP. Which they did.
The Agency then proceeded to spend almost 2 weeks ignoring both me, and ClientCompany through direct emails and calls. Turns out they'd done a credit check on a closed former company of ClientCompany and were doing all sorts of weird shenanigans on their end.
So, given the stellar incompetence of Agency, my pressing bills and the dire need for a developer for ClientCompany to get some work done, ClientCompany contacted me directly, and instructed me to come in. So I did.
And for two weeks, t'was grand. Work got done, productivity soared, things were published, ClientCompany clients were satisfied. UNTIL:
Agency sent demands to ClientCompany for £2000 for placing me. I got a text from ClientCompany at 4am on Monday, 11th June saying I was not to come in, until further notice. Wat.
At no point has Agency contacted me, since they sent me to interview. The last conversation I had with "J" at Agency was about starting the job, a week before ClientCompany and I gave up on them and went direct..
I've been screwed out of money. Today is day #2 of not making any money. Do I have legal grounds to attack Agency for lost earnings? Does ClientCompany have any liability to Agency given their fantastic incompetence?
Agency has no signed contract with ClientCompany OR me.
I'm currently losing £170/Day. ClientCompany might be losing significantly more. | Job agencies are dicks, threatening my client, losing me money. What do? |
t3_2ksx8u | relationships | I (19M) am trying to get over my friend (18F) that I have feelings for. | Okay, so here's my predicament. Me and my friend are decently close. Not close like anything romantic, but as close as two friends can be. We know each other pretty well, and we're pretty comfortable around each other at this point. My main issue is that I'm straight, and she's pansexual. I think she's given up on guys entirely because she recently came out to her family as lesbian. Now, I have feelings for her, but she does not have any feelings for me. But here's the heavy hitter.
She does things like she does have feelings for me. Nothing romantic, but we talk on a nearly every day basis, she texts and calls me over all people when she's bored, and now she wants to get an apartment with me. Now, I'm alright with this, but I'm confused as to why she's doing these things. She has, straight up said to me, that she doesn't have romantic feelings for me. But I'm confused as to whether or not she does. She's said before that she's had past relationships that've turned out awful. I tend to not ask her about them, but the pattern in her relationships with guys is that they're dating, they break up, they don't associate with each other anymore.
Is she just lying to me so we don't risk not associating with each other if we do get together and break up? Or is she legitimately not interested? If she really isn't interested, then how do I get her out of my head? She's everything I've wanted in a woman. She is THE perfect type for me. I mean, we have the same preferences for just about everything, and I'm very attracted to things that describe her, (dimples, brunette, short, girly, cutesy, etc.) but should I just forget about ever taking a step forward with her and just be perma-friend-zoned? I tend to overthink things a lot, so am I doing just that, and I should just forget about anything romantic between us? | I have feelings for my friend, but I'm not entirely sure she doesn't have any feelings for me. She treats me like a boyfriend and I'm confused. |
t3_1g5cp5 | relationships | I [23F], get mad when boyfriend [21M] doesn't treat me well and I try to punish him. How do I change my behavior to control my anger? We've been together for 2 years. | Last night I couldn't sleep. I tell my boyfriend: "I'm having a hard time sleeping". He tells me: "I can't stay awake" and then turns his back to me and tries to sleep. I wanted him to cuddle with me or console me somehow to help me sleep, so I got upset and felt insulted when he turned his back. I immediately told him to go sleep on the futon outside. He went to sleep on the futon after refusing, but decided to when I wouldn't stop talking.
I feel like my anger caused me to blow this whole situation out of proportion. At the moment, I felt like my boyfriend did not care about me and I did not want to tolerate that. How should I have handled this situation, and how can I get over feeling a need to punish my boyfriend? | I felt like my boyfriend didn't care about me, got upset and kicked him out of bed to "punish" him. This really didn't work, and I continued being upset. How can I learn to better control my anger and get over this reaction of feeling the need to punish him when I feel he is not treating me well. |
t3_xew9i | relationship_advice | How do I (19/F) get my boyfriend (22/M) to do more things with me? | So I (19/F) would like to do more things with my boyfriend (22/M), but I can't think of what to do. It seems like everything I suggest or come up with, he doesn't like and doesn't want to do. I wanted to go swimming, so we went to a pool with one of our roommates, but he refused to go in with us, and just sat at the other end of the pool and watched. Right now Im not in school as it's summer vacation, so I have been pretty bored at home since I only work part-time. I often want to go and get out of the house, not really caring what we do. But everything I can think of he never wants to do! I try asking him what he wants to do, and what he likes, but he almost always says "I don't know."
Now another issue, is he enjoys playing WoW a lot. I don't care if he plays it, but I do hate when he makes me wait because hes playing the game. Sure we are sitting at home doing nothing, im surfing reddit, hes playing the game, thats fine. Its when I need to go somewhere, and I have to wait 15 minutes sometimes more, until he is finished his raid or whatever hes doing in the game.
Im not sure if this is relevant, but maybe it has to do with why he never wants to do anything?
Other details: We live together, dating for 1.5 years, Im going on vacation for a month starting tomorrow so tonight is our last night together. | Boyfriend never wants to do anything I suggest, when asked he claims to not know what he wants to do, also spends lots of time on WoW and makes me wait around when we have things to do |
t3_10uxvg | relationships | I[M22] am fell for a co-worker[F30] who recently got engaged | When I first met her she already had a boyfriend[30]. I always was attracted to her but never tried to pursue it because she had a boyfriend. Due to similar interests we would hang out outside of work. About 3 weeks ago she suggested for me to try and pursue one of her friends over drinks. That day we happened to kiss before her friend even showed up. Since then we were unable to keep our hands off each other.
I have always felt that her boyfriend was trying to change her into something he wants but maintained that they should not break-up a 2 1/2 year relationship because of our fling. She was actually willing to "take a break" from her boyfriend to see if we would amount to anything but I told her not to.
I should mention that during the year I have known her, I have surmised that she was mostly with him for his social status(85k a year job/mutual friends that are higher ups in companies) and she has been waiting for him to pop the question to secure her future. From what I gathered he has been waiting to ask her only after she changes her personality for him.
This past weekend we had sex and the very next day he proposed to her. This after her literally debating to break-up him. She accepts hesitantly. I am happy for her because this is what she wanted since I had met her but I am feeling heartbroken inside.
She keeps telling me that she does not want this to affect our friendship but I can't even look at her like I used to without feeling empty.
Should I maintain the friendship and act like it never happened? Or should I cut off contact and move on? | I fell in love with a girl who recently got engaged |
t3_4e6a0q | AskDocs | Elbow pain while throwing | I am 16 and I play baseball for my highs school varsity team. I was pitching in a scrimmage on Wednesday and while I was warming up I felt a pop on the inside of my elbow, it didn't hurt that bad or anything so I didn't think much of it and went ahead and pitched. Although when I started pitching I noticed that I was throwing around 20 mph slower than normal and I couldn't throw strikes to save my life. After I was done pitching I was put at catcher and whenever someone stole second base and I tried to throw them out my throw would be super slow and end up rolling or slowly bouncing to the second basemen. After all that when we were finishing up practice I took my compression sleeve off and the inside of my elbow was in a lot of pain, I told my mom and she made a doctors appointment for Friday. So the next day at practice I was warming up and stretching and my elbow popped again while throwing and it became painful to throw. So on Friday at the doctor I described my symptoms and stuff and he just kind of looked at it and said I probably had golfers elbow. Where I live there isn't a lot of baseball played so he didn't do any of the tests to check for any torn ligaments or something and he said come back in three weeks if it is still bugging me and to not pitch during that time. What my concern is, is that I tore or strained my ucl and that I may need surgery. | Elbow popped while pitching and it hurts on the inside of my elbow to throw or pitch, doctor shrugged it off and said I have golfers elbow, while I think I injured my ucl. |
t3_3t0pbn | loseit | Prevention (i.e non-surgical) of excess skin during large scale fat loss and any experiences with Gotu Kola? | So I (22/M/300lbs/6'3") am currently about 10% of the way to my fat loss goal, going from 310lbs+ down to around the 200lbs mark using the /r/4Hourbodyslowcarb diet. I've basically accepted the fact I'm going to end up with loose skin, even if I add some level of muscle.
I was recently listening to a Tim Ferris Show podcast where he interviewed Charles Poliquin about various topics related to fat loss and muscle building (a good listen here ) and they briefly covered the topic of excess skin after weight loss and mentioned a herb called Gotu Kola... Poliquin stated that after 6-9months of taking 3 times a day many of his clients started to see rapid reductions of excess skin. | so I'm basically wondering if anyone has had any experience with Gotu kola as a means for reducing excess skin or any alternative (non-surgical) methods for tightening up loose skin after fat loss |
t3_27sx7o | relationships | My [23M] girlfriend [23F] wants to go on a month long vacation by herself, doesn't want me to join | Hi folks.
I'll try to keep this short, English is not my native language so sorry for any weird sentences/spelling. We're both 23 and we're in a relationship for a year and a half.
We've been on a vacation last summer and everything went great. Now this summer comes around and she's finished her study. This means she now has all the time in the world to do what she likes before she gets a job.
However, her savings are running out (no job at all right now or for the past few years, she earns a little bit of money through the student association) and she wants to spend a great portion of it, if not all of it, to go to a different country for about a month.
I think it's a great idea and this is the perfect time to do something like this before she gets a job and can't go on long vacations anymore.
Now the part that I'm having trouble with:
I can't come. She wants to go by herself.
She wants to book a group holiday to a different country, Southern Africa for example.
When I ask her why she wants to go without me, she says that it's been something that she's wanted to do since before she met me and that it's just something she wants to do by herself.
So basically she wants to go have fun for a month in a different country with a group of strangers or just other people than her boyfriend. At least this is how I feel right now, since she won't have any money left to go on vacation with me when she gets back.
She knows that I love traveling as well and that I want to make a journey like that too, but she REALLY wants to go on her own.
So tell me, am I weird for feeling left out? Am I wrong for feeling a bit angry that she rather goes on a vacation with a group of strangers than with me? Oh, and she'll be going on a vacation with her parents as well, which they will be paying for. She doesn't want me to pay for our vacation either. | GF is going on a vacation with her parents which they are paying for and she's going on a vacation with a group of strangers with all the money she has left. Won't have any money left to go on vacation with me and doesn't want me to join her on her month-long vacation. |
t3_j0ler | relationship_advice | What to do about the end date of a college relationship... | I've been dating my current (and first) bf for a little over a year now. However, as the title says, we're both going into our last year of undergrad, so as time goes on, the end date is becoming more and more imminent and I don't really know how to react to it.
It's still uncertain where both of us will end up, but we're both intending to take the grad school route and go to the best school that will fund us. But as time goes on, I keep getting this idea that our whole relationship is meaningless and silly, because he's going to break it off with me as soon as he gets into a different school than me.
I realize it's silly to worry about something like this a year down the line and probably me being overly clingy in my first real relationship. But, not taking this into account, everything with him is better than I could have ever imagined! I just think sometimes when he mentions a school he wants to go to thats really far away (or even in a different country) that leaving me would be easy for him and that it would be better to break things off sooner than later. (I have no intentions of breaking up with him at all though). I'm trying to take a 'que sera, sera' approach, and just enjoying the time we have together now... | My bf of the past year and a half are graduating college this upcoming year and I don't know how to take the imminent expiration date on the whole ordeal... |
t3_4cu6oo | relationships | Me [20 F] with my friend Mark [21 M] who I've started ignoring | [names and stuff fudged] My classmate Mark I used to be great friends and everyone knew it. We have been friends about 2 years. but very recently he's turned into an asshole after he got heavily involved in politics. He has been telling people that there 'might have been something there' regarding him and i, when I had explicitly told him very early on in the friendship that us dating was not ever going to happen and that i was not attracted to him. He recently made some politically charged post on fb to which my other classmate David responded asking questions about why Mark was so upset about this issue. Mark became very agitated and rude, telling him to fuck off and that david was ignorant etc, to which David then refused to speak to him anymore. And when I stepped in to try to mediate (Our major is close knit and less than 40 people, so it's not good to have people fighting), Mark told me to [shut up because i didn't know what I was talking about]. All I did was remind him that we don't use that kind of language around friends.
So obviously I was a bit upset at this and i unfriended Mark on fb and haven't talked to him or even looked at him since, because i'm disappointed and just tired of his shit. i don't think people besides him have noticed yet, but i don't know how to deal with not wanting to talk to Mark anymore. He's pretty well known and liked among our major and sets things up like bbqs and parties which I've always gone to. I don't want to ask people to choose sides because everyone's pretty passive and 'hide head in hole until trouble passes' i think. The few people i've talked to aren't happy with what mark's doing, but they're still going to his bbqs, and others aren't taking the whole thing seriously. The people who don't know whats going on have already started asking why I'm not attending his bbqs anymore, what do I say?
i'm pretty sure not associating with mark anymore is the best course of action but maybe I'm wrong? | Mark told me to shut up when i tried to mediate between him and another person, was ignoring and unfriending him the best thing to do? What do i say when people ask why i'm not hanging out with Mark anymore? |
t3_1qrpi5 | pettyrevenge | Have fun being late to work tomorrow | I live in an apartment complex with underground parking, but unassigned spots.
There are several towers, and I live in the smallest and farthest tower, which also is the least occupied, so the parking around my tower entrance generally isn't a problem.
However, the complex's A/C machinery is right up against the spots for the tower, so it can be difficult to open your driver door if someone parks too close to the line.
This douche with a Cayenne GTS has been making it difficult to park the last week, so I've been waiting for the right amount of inches to pull this off.
He parked today a little to close, but just enough for me to get out with no issues; however he won't be able to get in without figuring out which apartment my car belongs to and me pulling out.
I'm going to take a long shower tomorrow and "not hear" my phone. (Sunday is the first working day of the week here.) | Douche with a Cayenne GTS parks like a dick, won't be able to get into his car tomorrow morning :) |
t3_1wp5mz | relationships | My [22F] boyfriend [23M] has never mentioned me on social media and it is bothering me. | I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half now. Things are pretty good and we see eachother everyday.
I feel like this may be a silly issue but at the same time I am quite bothered by it. My boyfriend has never mentioned me/having a girlfriend on any of his social media including Facebook, instagram, and Twitter. We also do not have any photos of us, we haven't ever even taken a photo together.
I also have never mentioned him on my social media but that is because I barely use it. Last status I've posted was months ago. I also was following by example, he never mentioned me so I never mentioned him because I felt he would not want me to.
Now all the friends that he actively hangs out with and his family all know we are dating, and if we go out he will always introduce me as his girlfriend. So this is a bit conflicting. It seems as if he his hiding his relationship online but not that way in person.
Today it really got to me because we were out for a birthday dinner for a friend and he tagged the other people we went with but not me. And many times when I buy him something or bring him food he will take a picture of it and in the caption act like he was one who got it. It's annoying to me.
I'm very non-confrontational and hate fighting (which is a problem) but I now feel the need to bring this up. Does this seem like an issue? How do I bring this up in a way to make it least likely to start a fight. I just want to explain how I feel almost hidden but not come off sounding crazy because it's just social media. | boyfriend has never mentioned me on social media but people know we are together and he always introduces me as his girlfriend. How do I validate that this bothers me even though it is just Facebook. |
t3_115uun | relationships | My boyfriend [19] gets angry when I [18] can't play games with him. What do I do? | My boyfriend is 19 and I'm 18. We've been together for three years. My boyfriend is a huge gamer; It's pretty much the only thing he does, spending all day/night playing. This doesn't bother me at all as he should do what he loves.
I do occasionally play games, and my boyfriend would like me to play online with him.
The problem is I can't afford to buy the specific games he wants me to get as I just started my first year at university. I only have what I've saved from working this and last summer, and half has already been used up from tuition, textbooks, and driver's ed. I feel like I should be saving for any future expenses that should come up. I looked into buying Guild Wars 2, like he wanted, but it's $60.
I'd also like to play Minecraft with him, as it's less expensive, but I don't own a credit card and my parents would say no to using theirs even if I payed them back.
Even when I agree to play free to download games with him, it seems like I never have time. During the summer I was either working, or too tired and just wanted to lie down or sleep. Now, I'm either at school all day, or reading and doing assignments.
I haven't told him about the money issue as it's a little embarrassing, but he thinks the other reasons may be excuses. We don't get to see each other often so he'd like to use this as an opportunity to sort of bond. He gets annoyed when I say I can't play when he asks right away sometimes.
How can explain this to him in a way that doesn't seem like excuses and that he understands?
Any tips on how to manage my time better so that I do have time? | Boyfriend's passion is gaming, and would like to include me. I can't afford games and never have time. How can I change this? |
t3_dmnk3 | self | Help me Reddit! IAMA 22 year old male who's dick seems to be broken | I am a 22 year old male. I am in shape, eat well and exercise regularly. I have been dating a girl for about 6 months now and we began having sex after about 2 months into the relationship. However, for the last month or so I've had almost no sexual drive and haven't been able to get an erection when my girlfriend has tried to make a move on me.
I have had some sexual problems in the past that were similar but I wasn't always like this. Growing up, i had a strong libido and would try to screw anything that moved. Then, early in my college career, I almost had a nervous breakdown. I went to the doctor and was prescribed an anti-anxiety medicine (celexa) and I took it for 3 months. During that time, my libido went down and I had trouble getting an erection (although when I did get one, I could maintain it).
Now, 9 months after I stopped taking the medicine, I seem to have lost my sexual potency. I can't figure out why.
Suggestions? Questions? | I am a young, fit male. My dick doesn't work. I need help. Suggestions? |
t3_3tl44m | relationships | Should I [21f] call the guy [22m] I'm dating first? | Okay I know this might sound stupid and petty but I haven't dated in 2 years so this is all new to me.
I started dating this guy like 2 weeks ago. On our first date we talked about social media and phones because I got the vibe from him he is not a big texter. He said he rather talk on the phone than text. So since then we talk on the phone almost every night we are not together. Our calls range anywhere from 1 hour to 3 hours.
Well I realized I am the one that initiates most the phone calls. There was a few times he called first but it was either because I asked him to call me when he was free or he missed my call. | I keep calling the guy I am seeing first. Does it matter? |
t3_1fkg6k | relationships | I [22F] made the mistake of seeing my husbands [25M] Facebook messages. | 22 Female, married for 2 years, together for 5, with 25 male and we have one daughter, 3 years old. We have always been very open with our social media networking, often asking the other one to check notifications, messages, etc for ourselves. I recently learned about the "others" folder on Facebook and saw I had a bunch of unseen messages, decided to check my husbands as he has no access to a computer.
It turned out to be lucky I did because he had an important familial message in there, but I also ended up finding messages to women, and an ex whom he had an extensive and close relationship with, that contradicted a lot of things I had previously believed. Nothing so terrible that it outright proved cheating, but messages like "I still love you, I'm sorry for the way things ended, I think about you a lot" (to the ex) and messages that were highly flirtatious and lacked mentioning of being in a committed relationship to various "friends". Previously he had told me these women were hitting on him, contacting him, etc. and now I know this isn't true.
I'm really not too distressed as they all were BEFORE we got married, but I feel a bit angry. If he lied about small stuff like that, it seems highly likely that at some point he cheated on me. It doesn't help that we are in a long distance relationship as of last week, and will be for the next 5 months.
So I KNOW it's my fault for clicking the link, it was so stupid of me but honestly I didn't even expect to see anything of the likes! At this point in our relationship do I just let it go? | Wound up finding misleading and slightly romantic messages from my husband to other women on Facebook from before we got married. Do I confront him about my feelings? |
t3_2rad6d | tifu | TIFU by farting at work | This just happened literally 15 minutes ago.
I work graveyard shift at a hotel and I got in at midnight. I get behind the desk and start talking with my coworker about the day and how many guests we have and usual work stuff. I felt a fart coming on, a pretty decent one as I'd had a few slices of a meat lovers pizza for dinner and some fig bars and whole grain bran muffin bites earlier in the day.
Being a nice guy I decided to hold it in until he left.
At 12:30, as soon as the door closed behind him, I let loose. It didn't take much coaxing to release this awful cloud and I finally started feeling much needed relief.
After a solid 8 seconds of one long, gloriously unbroken and horribly noxious fart I started pushing in order to expel the last of the trapped gas when everything went horribly wrong.
I was concentrated so hard on pushing out the rest of this awful emission that I started peeing.
In my pants.
It wasn't **a lot** but it was enough. I ran into the bathroom and took off my boxers and tried my best to dry my jeans but it didn't help much. So now I'm just sitting here with a towel on my lap, covering my cold and wet shame, typing this out hoping I can find some febreeze or something. | Peed my pants a little bit at work trying to push out the rest of a fart. |
t3_2u1rcj | self | I fucked up incredibly badly and need to rant | So there's this girl that I've been in an online relationship with for the past several months. Over time, she told me some serious things, things that I talked to the counselor at my school about. The counselor at my school, with my consent and all, contacted the school this girl was going to and told the counselor there about the stuff my now ex GF was involved in. Anyways, long story short, CPS ended up investigating her house and she's probably going to be removed from her home because I told my counselor about this stuff.
Did I do the right thing, Reddit? From what she told me, she was deeply depressed and was harming herself. Her parents either didn't know or don't care from what she's told me. | may have gotten a girl placed in the foster care system. I'm extremely guilty about this. Did I do the right thing? |
t3_x3f5j | relationship_advice | Why does it always seem to be Feast Or Famine? | Lately I have begun to come to terms with a trend in my life. And after asking my friends, it's an issue all around. I have spent 9 months of my life alone, living here after moving for a job. Not alone necessarily... I dated around but nothing really stuck. Until lately, I met a girl and I am really into her. She's great and we have a lot of fun together.
BUT... obviously it wouldn't be that easy or I wouldn't be posting this. This past weekend I met someone else as well. I"m not quite as into her but she is really cute and a lot of fun. I feel like this is a repeat pattern in my dating life. I will go for a long time without anyone, and then suddenly I'm juggling two. It's not fair to me and it's not fair to either girl as well.
Anybody else see this happening? I don't buy into the "its because you have more confidence" thing. There's something to be said for it but I just dont think that's the case for me in this particular situation. | Went 9 months not seriously dating anyone, now suddenly I'm juggling two girls |
t3_2d72gx | relationships | I [22F] left a mentally abusive and selfish relationship how do I separate it from now? | My three relationship ended in October with the realization that my bf [21M] was a narcissist and extremely selfish in our relationship. He was manipulative, especially when it came to sexual activity. I felt extremely used and scarred. He always talked down to me, I felt like I was an insignificant stupid child in his eyes and I always felt self conscious and insecure around him. To top it all off he never trusted me around anyone and we were constantly fighting over everything.
So this brings me to now. I have a boyfriend [24M] and we have been together for almost three months now. He treats me well and the way things are going are really great. I feel happy and he makes me feel good about myself. But it seems that I'm constantly apologizing or seeking for ways to please him when it's not needed. I feel like I have to do things to keep him from getting mad at me based off my past relationship. Does anyone else have this problem? How do you get over past relationships so they don't eat at your new ones and cause problems there? | How do you separate a bad past relationship from a current good relationship? |
t3_tddim | AskReddit | So I read a lot about police brutality on reddit. Time to turn the tables, which police related stories restored your belief in law enforcement. I begin. | I'm from germany, my impression of the american law enforcement is created through the internet. And as you can guess, it's almost only bad news you read on the net. But I'm sure that this isn't representative at all.
So here is my story. I was on a student exchange in Berlin and some friends and I were getting pretty drunk and were partying all over town. So after a long night we finally decided it was time to head to our hotel. But upon leaving the club we realized that we had no idea how to get back. Berlin is pretty huge and the only thing we knew was the name of the street our hotel was in. And as poor students that we were, there also wasn't the option of taking a cab. Also it was the pre-iPhone time so no GPS guidance for us.
We ended up running in circles with no idea where to go. Somehow two cops must have seen us running this way again and again. So this police car stops right near us and the window rolls down. The officer asks us if we are lost. We told him our story and where we needed to go. He then starts to explain to us (we were obviously still drunk) where we need to go.
As the explanation got longer and longer the other cop says "Look at these guys do you think they'd even find the way around the next corner? And by the way even I wouldn't know where to go after your explanation. Come on hop in guys.". So this two police officers ended up taking some drunken tourists home to their hotel. Oh and the best thing was, not everyone of us was in the legal age for drinking. | Were drunk in another city. Didn't know how to get to hotel. Cops describe how to get back, realize we're to drunk to get there, so they drove us back. |
t3_1ictit | relationships | My 18/BF has pretty bad anger issues. | It is the only thing I have against him. Other than this, he's perfect for me. I don't want to just leave him because I do believe people can change, but I do need advice. Anything. I know we're young and he's smart, wonderful, but just a little broken in some aspects. Here's a few examples of his anger issues.
-Him crying after a disagreement while screaming at me
-Punching/Smashing his head into walls, doors, etc
-Not letting me leave, taking my keys, anything to keep me around
-Hitting himself, causing nose bleeds and black eyes
-Breaking things
Sometimes he even gets close to passing out. | My young boyfriend needs to find a way to control severe anger. |
t3_1c2p1p | books | People ask "What should I read next?", here's how I made my decision last night: | 7:00pm, at work. Just finished reading *Dragons of Autumn Twilight*. What do I read next? Damn, I knew this was going to happen. If I start the second book, I'll have to read the third. I'm not in the mood for another fantasy, but I don't know if I'll ever get back to it. Going home at 8pm. It's too late to start a new book anyway. Check Reddit, see what's new. ...Oh yeah, Iain Banks. Final book due in June. Never read Banks, maybe read his first book: The Wasp Factory. Yeah, I'll put it on my Kindle when I get home. Go home, loaded my Kindle with the book. Ahh, relief. I'm set. Watch TV; time for bed(reading). This'll be great! Read a few pages and...it's not happening. meh. Back to the Kindle menu and start searching. Maybe a different Banks? Alastair Reynolds? Hugh Howey! Perfect...Half Way Home. Read a few pages and...damn, not happening again. Should I just start the second Dragonlance...it's fresh in my mind. Fuck, fuck, fuck, 11:15 already. Gotta find something. Star Wars! Aw, crap. Didn't load the next book in the series. I'm not getting out of bed and turning on the computer just to load another book--my feet just got warm. Mental note, add more Star Wars to the Kindle. Search, search, search...Oh, I've got the new translation for Roadside Picnic. Read the original three times already, so this should be good. I want to see if I can notice the difference. Read a few pages and...it sticks! | I never know what I'm going to read next. |
t3_38mt26 | personalfinance | Need advice on overbearing college expenses | Hello /r/personalfinance I am currently a student at a 6 year pharmacy school entering my 3rd year in September and I am seeking advice on a way I would be able to finish school. First of all 6 year pharmacy program provides students with a Pharm D after graduating and because it is a specialized program, most credits are not transferable to other schools. The tuition is almost $40000 a year but with scholarships it is around $10000 which I have to pay. 5th and 6th years, my scholarship would also not be eligible due to those years being counted as graduate school years. I was able to scrape through my first two years with few external scholarships and money that I had saved up from working throughout high school and college. My other living expenses including rent, utilities, transportation, and food add up anywhere from 600-800 a month. I would like to turn towards student loans to help ease the financial burden but unfortunately I am unable to consider federal loans and most private loans. I came to America at the age of 4 along with my mother and father around 15 years ago. Initially we were here on a visitor's visa which soon expired. My parents are now divorced and my father moved back to Korea and essentially vanished from our lives. My only family here in America is my mother who is an alien and my younger sister who was born in America as a citizen. I am currently on DACA which gives me the right to work legally in the US and stay without the fear of deportation. I am working as much as possible around being a full time student but I make barely enough to cover my living expenses let alone pay for school tuition and fees. My mother makes about $25000 a year which is enough to support herself and my sister but not much more to help me pay off the incoming costs of my education. My status does not give me eligibility for FAFSA as I am not an American citizen or permanent resident and neither am I able to get private loans due to not having any adult family members that are citizens. Please I need your advice on how I can continue my education for another 4 years. | Trying to pay around 10k a year for next 2 years then 40k 2 years after. Not citizen or permanent resident so cannot get FAFSA or most private loans. No adult family members in America besides my mother who is an alien. |
t3_2ixgjr | tifu | TIFU by crashing my friend's car. | Now she's extremely upset (understandably so), and her car isn't totaled but has some reasonably bad damage in the front. Unfortunately she didn't have collision coverage. She's 16 and her father poured his entire savings into this old Mercedes for her, and he couldn't afford more than basic coverage. If I had known that I never would have agreed to drive her car, but I was unaware. Now she's told me that unless my parents pay to fix her car, I've ruined her senior year. I was ridiculously guilty for the first few hours since, and now I feel that way but not as much, seeing as she gave me permission to drive and neither of us knew she lacked collision insurance. The way I see it now, we are both to blame. However, she seems to think it's entirely my fault despite the laws, and is sending me texts like "I can't believe you just totaled my car". I did not total her car, nor is it entirely my fault. So now I'm stuck between consoling a friend and defending myself. Any suggestions on how to cheer her up without $1500 I don't possess? | don't drive your friend's car. |
t3_3nj5uf | dogs | [Help] Need advice on how to stop my older indoor dog from peeing inside the house | Not sure if this is the right place to post this but I need ideas or solutions to this problem. I have an Australian Shepherd mix who is about 10 years old and unfortunately having to pee quite frequently inside my house! I have tried placing pee pads in the usual spots he normally goes but it doesn't seem to be working much. He never pees in the house while we're home so we can never catch him in the act and discipline him and show him this is not ok. My husband thinks he will have to be an outdoor dog but I really hate the idea of kicking him outside as the ultimate solution. Other than installing a doggy-door for him, I really don't have any other ideas.
Does anyone here have suggestions or has had similar experiences with their dogs? | older indoor dog frequently peeing inside house, need solutions to problem, other than making him an outdoor dog |
t3_4ohhgs | relationship_advice | (25f) wanting to get back in the dating game with a baby? | Basically I was single throughout my whole pregnancy. Once I had my baby her bullshit excuse for a father came around trying to work things out (while he was dating another girl).
I know. Ghetto, right?
I promise I'm not a whore.
We dated for 4 years and broke up, afterward I found out I was pregnant and by that time he had been dating a new girl.
Long story short he broke up with his current gf to try and pursue me, I thought about it for a while but have finally decided to cut ties with him completely unless it's to see her. No calls, no texts, no anything.
In any event, my daughter is now 6 months old and I'd really like to get back to meeting someone.
The hard part is that, with my daughter, all I have time for is work and taking care of her. I might be able to go out 2-3 times a month because I'm so busy spending time with my precious little girl. | I have a 6 month old and want to try meeting a man. |
t3_2zbaz0 | tifu | TIFU by letting my mother-in-law use my laptop while I was on my desktop. | So my mother-in-law came by tonight for dinner and to see my baby daughter. We just got done eating dinner and were watching TV. My MIL started to tell me about a Facebook page she wanted me to see. She wasn't doing it justice trying to explain what to look for, so I yielded my laptop to her. In doing this, she became a little fumble-y with my daughter. I put the laptop down on a TV tray with a glass of water already on it and picked up my child. I was annoyed that she got this clumsy as she didn't take the time to sit down and get the baby secure before just diving onto the computer. As I'm standing there with baby in hands, my MIL whips my laptop around and knocks the water over. Luckily my wife was right there and snatches up the laptop before it got wet.
As this point, I had to leave the room as I was really upset at the lack of forethought my MIL generally has. She doesn't do anything calmly. She acts in quick motions and thoughts and never takes a moment to step back and think things through.
Well, I get on my laptop and message my sister-in-law, whom I am close enough with to vent at about my MIL. I wasn't thinking myself, and forgot that I had just left the laptop with my MIL to look up something as I'm messaging my SIL on the desktop... the message pops up on the laptop as I sent it on the desktop. MIL sees the message.
She told my wife as she was leaving that she saw it and was hurt. Now I'm the bad guy and my wife is pissed at me. | Laptop reveals messages about MIL to MIL, as I send them from desktop. |
t3_x1ii4 | legaladvice | Quick question regarding showing up to court dates. | Location: Minnesota, stearns county.
Myself and 3 others are planning on taking our old landlord to small claims court. One of the guys will be moving out of state within 2 weeks. We haven't submitted the claim yet, so obviously he's not going to be in-state for our eventual court date.
Should we 1. just take his name off of the claim, and sue for the same amount of money (we are suing for $ per person)
2. Take his name off of the claim, and sue for only the 3 of us who will make it.
3. Keep his name on the claim, sue for the original amount, and explain where the "extra" money is coming from.
What would happen if we went with option number 3? Which option is best?
Thanks for reading. | what happens if only 3 of 4 plaintiffs show up for a court date? |
t3_225c2c | weddingplanning | MOH duties...rant and advice about bachelorette party. | All my bridesmaids are long distance. Because of this, I had wanted to group the bachelorette party and bridal shower into one weekend in my home town where we all grew up. I expressed this to my MOH when the shower date had been decided. My aunts are taking care of the shower duties, so I told my MOH not to worry about the shower, she would have time to focus on the bachelorette planning.
Well my shower is next week and I found out today that the other bridesmaids have not been contacted about the bachelorette party. Two of them already had plans set up with their close families for their Saturday evening since they were visiting from out of town. I'm completely shocked and have no clue on how to talk to the MOH about this.
It's not like the MOH and I haven't discussed the party. Last weekend we decided on the restaurant we were planning on going to. I asked her to contact another bridesmaid for ideas on clubs afterwords. So we've kept in contact about the bachelorette party plans, but apparently the rest of the bridesmaids have no clue its happening. At this point it looks like it's just going to be me, her and a friend of mine that will be in town. Any ideas on what to do? I dont want to inconvenience the girls and make them travel hours and hours again, but man I was really hoping to have a bachelorette party... | My MOH was supposed to plan the bachelorette party conveniently the same weekend as the bridal shower. Its next week and none of the bridesmaids knew about it. |
t3_2j4mir | relationships | I [26/M] hate my girlfriend's [32/W] family. Would you marry the person of your dreams despite disliking their relatives? | I'm a 26 year old man and I've been with my 32 year old girlfriend for over 3 years now. Put simply, she is incredible and the woman of my dreams. Her family, on the other hand, I loathe. Although they genuinely approve of me, and would want nothing more but for me to marry my girlfriend, I can't stand them.
I hate them for the fact that they are completely dissimilar to my girlfriend. They are ignorant, ridiculously cheap, narcissistic, sexually repressed, highly religious, and never give my girlfriend and I space. I'm from an Italian background, thus family is highly important to me. Since my girlfriend is of Greek heritage, I thought our families would be similar, but they are worlds apart...
I understand that when you marry someone, you are essentially marrying their family as well. Although I love my girlfriend to death, I'm struggling with the idea of being stuck with her relatives (especially her parents) for the rest of my life...
Do any of you dislike your in-laws? How did you prevent them from tainting your marriage? | I want to propose to the woman of my dreams, but my intense disdain towards her family is preventing me from doing so. How do you cope with the fact that you will never understand or like your spouse's relatives? |
t3_3smz1z | tifu | TIFU by saying my girlfriends sisters name in my sleep. | So I work midnight shift. I hate it. My sleep schedule is horrid, and I never get to go out anymore. So I sleep when I'm off. Well this after noon I was sleeping for work. I fell asleep in the couch. Cause let's face it, Sleeping on couches is amazing. My girlfriend was cleaning up the living room. I talk in my sleep. It's usually gibberish. But occasionally people can have conversations with me if they catch me at the right moment. So I start talking I guess. My girlfriend listens intently when I talk idk if she's trying to get information or what, but there she is. So I guess I moaned her sisters name. Keep in mind that I have no sexual interest in her sister cause she's an asshole, and that is a big turn off. My girlfriend slaps me awake, and accuses me of banging her sister. Of course me being asleep I didn't know what the fuck she was talking about. She slapped me again, and left. We are deeply in love. We have both made mistakes. But I DID NOT FUCK HER SISTER. reddit please help. | said my girlfriends sisters name in my sleep. Now my face hurts and she's gone. |
t3_dfh7k | AskReddit | Do you remember any of your strange trains of thought? If so, do you remember the strangest? | For me it just happened recently. I was thinking of the show The Fairly Odd Parents that I used to watch when I was a kid, and I came to me that the plot of the show revolved around the protagonist having no common sense or forethought at all. I started thinking about what he could have done or what I would have done in his position (for anyone that doesn't know he's got magical fairies to do his bidding, the only limit on their power is a rule book saying exactly what they can't do). I started to think that he could create alternate universes where the rules didn't apply and he could do whatever he wanted. He could create as many as he wanted and do whatever he wanted in them. He would be omnipotent. | I thought about a kid's show I used to watch where the main character could have made himself a god. |
t3_102dbi | relationships | Not very attracted to my girlfriend anymore. (and other possible issues) | Bleh.. This has been a problem for me with almost every girl I've dated. I'll get "sick" of them or stop finding them attractive after a few months. This has happened with at least 15 girls, and only one I didn't get sick of.
Anyways, me [22m] and the girlfriend [28f] have been together for about 3 months now. Honestly, everything has gone pretty well and she's one of the coolest girls I've met. I found her quite attractive when we first started dating but now I just don't have much of an attraction to her. I am the type of person that needs a decent amount of alone time, and she seems pretty cool with that. We hang out maybe 2-4 days a week, and she texts me on the days we aren't together. I'd prefer not to talk at all on those days, but she's different than I am so I just suck it up and deal with it. If we don't hang out for like 3 days, I get pretty excited to see her, and then when I do see her, I don't really want to hang out with her for more than a few hours. Honestly, for some reason it just feels like I'm "settling" with her, but I really don't want to. I WANT to be attracted to her because I have tons of fun with her. This may sound confusing to you because it definitely is confusing to me. I don't know why I get like this with every girl I date. For some reason, there was one girl I was with that I didn't get sick of right away. We had a pretty good relationship for at least 2 years until I got sick of her selfishness.
Oh, and she hasn't gained weight or anything, she looks exactly the same as when I met her. Do any of you have any ideas to rekindle the attraction? I really want to give this a serious chance before I ruin yet another perfectly healthy relationship... | kind of sick of my girlfriend and I'm looking for a way to get things back on track with her |
t3_jlcvk | AskReddit | Is there any way to hide marijuana smoke smell? | Dilemma:
I'm stuck at my Mother's house and need to toke. It's very small, very cramped, and very open. I usually sneak outside to the garage to toke, but I'm always afraid I reek of Marijuana when I come back in. How can I mask the smoke smell?
Further info:
My mother sleeps in a loft overlooking the living room; which is where I return to after baking. I also have a brother, who is awake, and is in the room right around the corner from the living room. The bathroom is across from his room, and the kitchen is a part of the living room.
Usual Protocol:
Like I mentioned before, I normally smoke in the garage. Before returning I douse myself with an aerosol spray can. I've also considered blowing the smoke through a dryer sheet filled toilet paper roll (known as a sploof). Upon returning I make my way to the bathroom and brush my teeth. Afterwards, I deodorize and douse self in Febreze again.
Should I be doing more to combat the MJ pollutant? Less? Any suggestions to rid myself of this wonderful stank is appreciated! | Marijuana smell = bad, how make good? |
t3_3k4iiy | relationships | I [ 14 M ] like a girl [ 14F ] . I want some suggestions from you all guys for my current situation | It was three months back when I saw her . I got admission in a new Church for Catechisis studies . It was after 2 weeks joining the Church that I saw her, in the Church . She was in my class in the previous church . She left to the new Church two years before me. I didn't have any sort of attraction towards her till two months ago. She was the perfect girl for me and I fell under her charm .
She takes quick glances at me while talking with her friends . She is very social but rarely talks with boys.
Once I saw her coming towards my direction and waited . We she came face to face with me I smiled at her , and she returned the smile . She has smiled at me a few times now . She has some kind of interest in me and most probably likes me . We both are in ninth grade .
Last Sunday she was unusually sitting alone in a bench . She hardly but gave a smile but she felt sad . What must have made her sadden ? What should I be doing next Sunday ? The only important thing I hadn't done is to talk to her . | Is next Sunday the right time for it ? If no , what should I be doing ? |
t3_1b1xae | relationship_advice | [26/m] Head wants to like this girl, heart doesn't | This girl likes me. We've been on a few dates. On paper she's really everything I'm looking for. The only problem is I don't feel the same about her. I've naturally developed crushes on girls and it feels wrong to try to make a relationship out of something where I don't feel anything in the beginning. However, it's not exactly like I'm getting jumped left and right by supermodels so I don't want this to be a lost opportunity.
But part of me feels like if I keep trying to make myself like her, I'll have a mental block against actually liking her. I've met girls before whom i didn't have a crush on and developed one over time, but I don't know if that will happen when the possible relationship is blaring in my face right from the beginning. I'm not sure how to move forward.
Have you ever ended up with someone who you didn't really 'fall for' at the beginning? | do I try to force myself to like this girl who likes me and is a good fit on paper or if i don't feel it naturally, it's not gonna happen? |
t3_1tg9sp | relationships | Me [19 M/F] with my ex-gf [20 F] 2 months together, wonder what she thinks of me now | Long story short, a girl I was super crazy in love with dumped me 6 months ago. Since then, I rebuilt myself. I've lost a lot of fat and gained a ton of muscles (people have told me that I look like Enrique Iglesias now) , I've grown 2-3 inches taller (I'm 19 by the way), dress better, got a new hair cut, I've made a lot of new friends, I'm actually way more popular now (I used to be super shy and insecure when we went out) , and I got my shit together and I'm getting good grades, and have a solid job. For some reason, I question what's going through her head now, if she saw me (or seen my pics on Facebook)? She dumped me because she didn't have time for a boyfriend, but started dating another guy 2 weeks later... It really broke my heart. I still wigh her the best though because I cared a lot about her at one point though... | used to be socially awkward and not really attractive, now I dress better, am more attractive, and outgoing. Wonder what my ex would think of me now... |
t3_3b4u3w | dating_advice | [Question] Am I being unreasonable? | Basically, I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and I love her with all my heart but in the past 2 years we have been having a few problems but one is bigger than them all.
The sex:
I have a massive sex drive, like I could go 4-5 times a day and not break a sweat but with her, I am lucky to get sex once a month, her sex drive is non existent and when it does happen, she makes 0% effort.
I try romantic gestures like cooking her favourite meal, giving her a massage, etc but nothing, Nada, not even a "is that a hot dog in your pocket or are you just happy to see me". There is no dirty talk, no seduction, nothing from her.
I'm in my 20's, so is she, I have been with and want to continue to be with her, I love her to bits, she has been a rock for me through the hard times and in all other departments, she is an alright girlfriend.
I have all these thoughts that she may be cheating, maybe she doesn't think I am attractive anymore, maybe she is falling out of love with me, I just have all these concerns and no answers.
When I brought this issue up with her last time, she walked out of the house, came back 3 hours later, broke down crying and then said "I cant give you what you want, I love you, I just cant do what youre asking"
All I am asking is for regular sex, like most healthy couples have...
So anyway I chose to concede the argument but it is something that really gets to me, a healthy relationship should have regular sex and I have to admit I have had temptations to take up some offers I have been given... which is horrible I know... But I haven't taken any of those offers up... my worry is, if I go through another year of this, I might...
Any advice guys? | In LTR, GF barely puts out, worried something is wrong #HelpMeEndTheDrySpells |
t3_39redp | tifu | TIFU by accidentally in a mans hair | Obligatory obligatory this wasn't today disclaimer
Anyway, this happened around 7 years ago when my wife and I had just gotten married. Our baby boy was born the next year, and, being the amazing husband I am, do literally all of the chores to score brownie points with the wife (and we had a baby so double scoring, there). Stuff like cleaning,washing up, vacuuming etc.
When the new year began, the cold virus again swept the country and soon enough our little family was quickly acquainted with it. I said that I would go shopping, take our baby all while having a cold, so she could stay in bed (thats like a *triple point combo*) and relax.
The journey of the shop was one **I doubt I'll soon forget**. It was fairly uneventful, however it was packed up as hell and there were basically two lines of people for each aisle. I noticed another baby with the man ahead of me, (he's got the same idea) and just carried on shopping. You know that tickling feeling in the back of your throat, when you just **have** to cough or you'll literally explode? That. I sounded like someone had the black death in the full supermarket- full stares from everyone around. On the last cough, I emitted a large, perfectly spherical, moss green piece of phlegm at the speed of light.
The man ahead was still casually shopping as a piece *of my phlegm* dripped and clotted in his hair. The people ahead, the people to my side, hell even the people behind saw this thing, but he didnt. I proceeded to immediately nope the fuck outta there before someone told him and have never returned to the shop since. | Went shopping. Had itchy throat. Launched primordial ooze into mans hair. Ran like hell |
t3_2z5fvo | relationships | I [21/F] became good friends with a guy [21/M] in the span of a few weeks. He's been flirting with me, but has a GF [21/F] of 2 years. | We're both university students studying in the same field. I got to know him through our numerous mutual friends and we've hit it off pretty well. He's messaging me and snapchatting me all the time, we hang out and we tease each other a lot, especially because we've got the same sense of humor.
He's been getting flirty with me too. I'd really like the attention if it weren't for the fact that he's been in a two-year relationship with a girl from another campus. I heard from a few of our mutual friends that he's growing distant from her. I'm a believer in the idea that people can fall out of love, but I don't want to come across as a 'homewrecker' or something to other people.
I'm getting lunch with him this week and I want to figure out his true intentions: whether he actually wants to end things with his GF and if he just wants to fuck, or if he's actually interested in me. I usually enjoy casual sex but I've recently been wanting emotional intimacy too.
I also want to add that we were playing pool once and his GF called. He didn't bother responding. Also, he asked me if I planned on going to Formal at the end of the year and if anyone was taking me (with a winky emoticon). I wasn't sure about either question but it caught me off guard that he wanted to know.
I need advice for our meeting? If he doesn't talk to me about dating first then how do I bring up the topic to him? | Guy who has been flirting with me is distant from his girlfriend of two years. He's been dropping signals that he's interested in pursuing something with me. We're getting lunch and I want to talk to him about "us". |
t3_debkn | relationship_advice | Has it really come to this? | Hey /RA, you all have been of great help to me in the past so here I am again. This is a throwaway account btw. Here's the skinny:
I'm a single 29 year old male living in North Carolina. I'm a good guy, I'm decent looking, and I'm really easy to get along with. My problem is that I just can't find a girl that makes me happy and is accepting of the fact that I'm atheist. Since I've lived here (5 years) I've had one serious girlfriend who held the same beliefs as me and I truly thought she was the one, until she broke up with me that is.
Since then I've gone on countless dates with girls that either weren't interested in me or had a serious problem accepting the fact that I don't believe in a higher power. Honestly, the happiest I've been in a relationship in the past three years was when I dated a Thai girl who was visiting the US for 6 months. She could've cared less what my beliefs were and everything was great ... until she went back to Thailand. She didn't have any desire to stay in the US as all of her family was still in her hometown so there was just no way to make that work. I should also add that I dated a Chinese girl while I was living and working in China earlier this year and had the same experience - religion was simply not an issue. So what do I do Reddit? I'm seriously considering looking in other states or even overseas for a companion but I just don't know if that could work. I can't move out of NC for the foreseeable future but traveling to another state/country for a few weeks is not a problem. Do any of you know someone that's actually had success with finding an SO in another state/country online? Am I just completely out of my mind for even considering this? | Fed up with girls that can't accept that I'm an atheist and looking to find a partner in another state/country. |
t3_4a6y7a | relationships | Haven't spoken to or seen my ex (M23) of 7 years since our breakup almost 2 years ago. Is this normal? | I dated this guy for 7 years (began at age 14) and we broke up almost 2 years ago. The breakup was not mutual at the time (he ended it ultimately) but I realized very quickly it was for the best. It was a bitter breakup and towards the end of it I began resenting him for his selfishness and callous attitude (our relationship, I've come to realize, was not a great one). He did it over the phone. I have not seen or heard from him since.
Immediately after the breakup I waited for him to contact me and eventually got over that hope after about 2 months. I admit I did not contact him out of my own stubbornness (and also because I felt he didn't deserve to hear from me) but after the initial shock of the breakup and the anger/resentment subsided I had and still have no desire to talk to him.
We shared a lot of the same friends being together throughout our teens and early twenties but somehow have not accidentally run into each other yet. At first, I was hurt by him not reaching out—I kept thinking "we were together 7 years, we grew up together, blah blah"—and he has no desire to check-in or even say hi? Around the same time I lost interest in contacting him I stopped feeling hurt by this.
I'm sure at some point in our lives we will run into each other or find ourselves in a situation where we'll have to talk. Is it wrong to feel a little anxiety about this inevitable moment? I've been dating my current boyfriend for a year and half now and he is such a ray of light in my life. He has changed the way I feel about the world, relationships, people, myself, etc. I am so happily in love with him. He says I shouldn't be anxious, that my ex isn't worth the thought. I suppose I agree. | My ex of 7 years broke up with me over the phone almost 2 years ago and I have not seen or heard from him since. Is this normal? Is it wrong to feel a little anxiety about the inevitable moment that we'll run into each other or find ourselves in a situation where we'll have to talk? |
t3_39v3j2 | relationships | Me [18 M] with my Younger Brother [13 M] Made me cry today | My brother and I have had our differences, but regardless of our issues I've always done everything in my power to help him. I've kept track of his fitness routine,
his grades in school, and have given him relationship advice.
As I stated before my brother and I fought a lot when we were younger like all kids would, and he used to tell me things like he hates me and things like that, but today he came down and gave me a birthday card with $20 in it and told me happy early birthday and gave me a hug which is something he's never done.
On the outside of the card it read "For my brother: Time changes and years pass by, but a brother only grows more special." On the inside it stated "I've always thought you are a wonderful brother, but i'm not sure I told you that enough. It's important to me that you know how much I love you and how lucky I feel to have you for my brother.
This last year things have changed a lot. He got accepted to one of the best high schools in San Francisco, and we have bonded on a closer level. I take him everywhere with me, to hang out with my friends, to the movies, I play video games with him and he even noticed it himself and
asked me why I let him hang out with me more often.
I feel absolutely horrible, I feel like I could have been a better brother to him when I was younger, and now he's out doing his own thing with his own friends. We share a birthday 4 days apart, and I really want to do something special for him, but have no idea what to do.
I'm not working anymore since I had a recent work injury. | My brother and I fought a lot as kids, but we grew closer within the last year. He bought me a card to tell me how much he cares about me and it touched my heart. I have little to no money, and he knows so he gave me $20 out of his own savings. I want to do something special for him, what can I do? |
t3_3jg9tq | relationships | I [20M] have dreaded hanging out with my family more and more every day. | Let me give back story, I live with my cousin and family friend in an apartment.
My family consists of my mom [51] and dad [48] my eldest sister [25] and her husband [23] my older sister [23] and her husband [24] me [20] and my younger sister [19].
My family has always been very close, and every Sunday and Wednesday we all hang out at my parents' house (due to church bringing us all together)
Most of what goes on these days are board games, lunch/dinner, and often a round of disc golf.
For a while I was all down for it, it was fun and I love my family so hanging out was great. But more and more every day I start hating it. Often when I consider staying home or hanging out with my family I really wish I could just stay home.
My family is very loud, and outgoing, and to some people probably very overwhelming. Board games and disc golf promote a very competitive environment which can be annoying sometimes. I'm not anti-competition but sometimes I don't wanna compete, I just want to relax.
However, declining an invitation to play a game or go for a round of disc golf is usually met with heckles and fun being made. Often times these visits just end up with me being annoyed and frustrated and just wanting to go home. So my 1st inclination is to just stay away.
But the last thing I would want to do is disappoint everyone by being a loner and just "stay at home and do nothing". I want to be a part of my family but often I can't stand being around them for extended periods or at all.
What
Do
I
Do? | I feel myself becoming more and more introverted and separated from my extremely extroverted family. But I don't want to disappoint any of them by staying home often. |
t3_t6db0 | relationships | What would you call our relationship? | My (let's call him my boyfriend for now) 26/m and I 22/f have been dating for about 2 years. We're rather nontraditional in our relationship style- we live together, but have separate bedrooms. We sometimes sleep alone, we sometimes don't. We have sex about once a month or so, but don't cuddle afterwards. We are also free to date/love/sleep with other people, which we self-identify as polyamorous. Basically we're just best friends/roommates/lovers.... but we really have a "it's us two against the world" mindset. We're connected on a deep level that's beyond just friendship.
Anyway, the point here is that we both detest the phrase "in a relationship with". We used to use "dating" but that doesn't quite seem to fit either. Lover squicks me, and "fwb" doesn't seem to capture it. I'm looking for something along the lines of "companion" or "counterpart", but I can't find just the right word. Help me reddit? | What's another way to say "in a relationship" without making it sound so serious and committed? |
t3_4sp5hs | relationships | My love interest [22 F] is on the fence about getting into a relationship with me [22 M/F] due to passion vs. comfort. | I've been seeing this girl about a month before college ended, and we've known each other since the our first year of college. I considered her one of my good friends. At the end of college, we had a friends with benefits relationship until I started having feelings for her. We both had our summer vacations and trips, but now we'll be living around the same area as we begin our respective careers.
Last week, we talked about the potential relationship looming in my head. It's weird because while I would like for us to get into a relationship, she's confused about her desires, which in turn confuses me.
Because she's known me as a friend first, she feels comfortable around me, but it's not a fiery passion like her past relationships. However, she mentions that all of those relationships ended in a disaster, and she's confused as to if she should pursue this one. She's told me she's willing to give it a shot and work towards it. She's obviously interested in the relationship, but the factors holding her back.
I really like her, but I'm not sure if I should pursue a relationship with her feelings in mind. Maybe I'm afraid of getting hurt or wasting my time when I can have a stable friendship instead, as I move into the 8-5 work world. I'm unsure what to do and it is driving me crazy.
Is it worth my time if we're not a THE match? Should I even bother? My heart says go for it, but my brain is telling me to think about it, and my gut isn't responding. | My love interest is on the fence because her relationships in the past have all been passion driven, but I'm seen in more of a comfort light. I'm unsure if I should pursue a relationship. |
t3_2dv3na | relationships | My (20m) girlfriend (21f) wants to break up because she is emotionless. | I made the title less suspicious incase she does find out about reddit.
So background. We've been dating for 8 months now and she's been amazing. I love her to death. we have our occasion spats but we get along 95% of the time. lately she's been feeling numb and out of character. she feels like she should break up with me because it's not fair to me. She also wants to end things and work on her self but she knows that if she ends things we can't be in contact. it would cause us too much pain. She doesn't know what's wrong with her. I told her I'll be there for her and we can work this out together. she's told me that I'm a model bf. so what do I do. end things and lose the girl of my dreams for the rest of my life or do I fight together with her. | gf is numb and wants to break up because she thinks I deserve better and wants to be alone to work on herself. |
t3_1o1rmu | jobs | Will a post grad degree help my career as a filmmaker? | MFA filmmaking (post grad) student here, and I'm suddenly having second thoughts about my education choices.
Being in a very competitive industry, how does this extremely expensive course help me with my career?
Throughout the course we get to make two short films, self funded, with ample equipment, but apart from building my portfolio will this MFA eventually help me stand ahead of other candidates?
I've often thought to myself that I'd be able to self fund my first feature if I didn't pay the fees, but then again I'm learning quite a lot at the same time too.
My career goals are to get a stable job teaching at a university while I gradually work on writing and eventually making my first feature film.
Any advice on this front would be extremely helpful.
Thanks! | second thoughts about the post grad course I've picked. |
t3_3h4nsw | relationships | Me [24M] with my [23F] girlfriend (?) of around 6 months, I don't understand her thoughts about our relationship | This spring, around February, I met a girl from high school who I didn't hanged out at all then, but now we clicked and went out a lot of times. We kissed a lot and even fucked until now, but we didn't got official. Ofcourse the question on what our relationship status was raised, mainly I asked and she always said that she doesn't want a relationship because of the shitty ones she had in the past. I had a very very bad one 4 years ago also, and I didn't had a girlfriend since, only one nighters and fuck buddies because I was afraid that will be in a shitty one again.
We both decided that we have to move in another city and then she asked me if I want to move in with her, this happened two months ago. Despite the fact that she said a few times that she doesn't want a relationship she always treated me as a boyfriend. We were basically behaving like we are together, but didn't admitted it, mostly just her didn't, I am all in, I'm not afraid anymore.
We finally got in that said city where we wanted to move and we both stay at different friends for a week, yesterday I tried to kiss her and she refused me saying that it's not ok now that we will be flatmates and also because everytime she moved with a boyfriend ended up badly.
I don't understand why is she behaving like this, she doesn't like me anymore? If all the relationships where she moved in with a guy ended up badly why she asked me in the first place then ? She is just afraid ? I really don't understand. I tried to talk with her, but she always tries to change the subject. Tomorrow we will go to see an apartment to move in and then to a movie… I don't know if I should back off and or carry on with my life, but I like her so so much. | I have a semi-girlfriend that doesn't want to be a full one despite the fact that she behaves like one |
t3_2t5d20 | offmychest | It doesn't bother me anymore and I feel great!!! | I am a 22 year old male who is about to graduate college at the end of the year. Throughout my whole life, I had one girlfriend.....and it lasted a few weeks (wasn't that fruit-full). Besides that one girl, I have had no experience in any relationship what-so-ever. For many years it took over me, from middle school till last week; I was thinking something was wrong with me for not having any relationship experience. I know I'm not a social outcast or anything, but dating wasn't in my radar for most of my life.
Then I realized something, that one day someone special will come along for me and you, heck I might not even expect it, but I am keeping myself from worrying anymore. I need to focus more on who I am and making my own identity. Plus I'm still young and I got my whole life ahead of me; I'm moving soon to a fantastic area for my career in the coming years, I'll be doing what I love and be around people who have the same passion as I do. Who knows, I'll probably run into her there, but for now, I'm not going to let society worry me to death about being single :) | I used to worry about being single, but not anymore; I'm focusing on my own personal goals, rather than scoring a date. |
t3_17punb | dating_advice | I don't feel like i want this as much as i should | 24m, I want to have a relationship with someone, but so often i don't find other people attractive. It's maybe like 1-2% of all women that i see that i actually have the desire to be with. I also feel a lot of pressure to date from family and friends, but that pressure, and the thought that i'm in my mid twenties and never had a girlffriend or hooked up turns me off of the subject. So it's a vicious circle. I'm out of university, there aren't places lots of women are any more. I feel like i've somehow missed my chances, and my dating resume will prevent me from getting a date.
Any thoughts? | i have a lot of pressure from people to date, don't find many girls attractive, and the thought of all the awkwardness and effort puts me off to where i think i might just pass on dating altogether. |
t3_18r78x | offmychest | Please don't murder me you fucking nut-job. | You know why I banged on your window and gave you the finger? Because you were parked in the GODDAMNED BIKE LANE. Its not a FUCKING SHOULDER LANE. I have to swing into traffic to get around you.
And your fucking decent response? Tearing around the corner after me and, I guess, pretend like you're going to *run me over*. And then when I dodge you call me a "pussy". I'm a fucking PUSSY for being afraid of being FUCKING RUN OVER BY A CAR. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT MAKE ME A PUSSY YOU MORON? You goddamn FUCKING psychopath. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU.
What really gets me is that you are somehow a human being existing in modern society, presumably embedded within a social group that does not shame you and give you a full-armed slap in the face for being a goddamn monster. Who do you go home to at night? Who are your friends? Do you even have any? Or does everyone you attempt to interact with recognize you for being the blithering, frothing idiot that you are?
You will probably never feel bad for this attempted murder, and you probably still don't understand why I gave you the finger, even while you idle in that painted bright green lane with bikes plastered all over it.
Have a sad life full of confusion and idiocy, you terrible, horrible, sad excuse for a human being. | trying to run me over on my bike for giving you the finger is not an appropriate response you despicable shitfucker. I hope you get thrown in jail one day once someone recognizes you for being the piece of shit you are. You'll feel right at home in jail with all your fellow sociopaths. |
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