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t3_2wxnvj | tifu | TIFU by throwing away brand new headphones | So today was like any other day. Get up, take a shower, go to class. Usually I like to listen to music as I walk to class especially since some of them are across campus which is a 10-15 minute walk. I plug my headphones into my phone and as I'm walking I notice that the music seems a little distant. I think the volume is just low so I turn it up, but it doesn't change. The music also has a weird tinny echo in the background too. I unplug them and plug them back in. No change.
*sigh*
Another pair of headphones broken. I tend to go through headphones pretty quickly. Most of them last about four months for me. I either need to start buying better quality headphones or taking better care of them. Well, no biggie. I'll just stop by the student store after class.
After class, I went to the student store and noticed they had the exact same pair of headphones I had, it was even the same color and they were on sale! Least this makes up for the bad luck this morning.
I get back to my dorm and try my new headphones just to check for any problems. They sounded perfect. I threw them and my bag onto my bed and started cleaning my dorm since I hadn't cleaned it in like 3 months. I throw my old headphones away along with a bunch of other trash I had lying around.
Fast forward to just a few minutes ago, when a friend of mine texts me to come study with him for a test coming up. So I grab my bag, get my books and plug in my headphones while I walk. Except something seemed off. The headphones crackled as I plugged them in and the music seemed distant and echoed...oh goddamn it! I had accidentally thrown out the brand new pair of headphones thinking they were the old ones! They looked exactly alike and I confused them. That was a waste of 50 bucks. | Headphones broke. Bought new pairs. Threw out new pair. Cried on the inside |
t3_mvqd4 | AskReddit | I just saw my math professor walking out of an adult store. | Nothing much really to add. I cannot really reveal names or tell you my name; hence the throw-away account. I would give you the address, but you "reddit-detectives" would figure out the college pretty easily (not many choices). I was thinking about turning this into a reddit-commic, but that would imply that I find humor in this situation. This professor is truly a great guy, but I've never really gotten along with him. My friend thinks that he's hilarious, but he was always so strict and straight that you'd never really pin him to be "the type". None of my friends know, although I know they would die in laughter.
THE STORY: This adult store is actually in a pretty public place 20 miles away from the college campus (where I live). He walks out of the store at eight looking completely casual. There was no sketch hat or 3 layered coat to hide his identity. I was eating pizza at the Dominoes right across the street. Our eyes lock for about 3 seconds, and I know he recognized me because I just attended his office hours at 5:00. There is no confusion that it was my Math Professor. I gave him the poker face, got up and left my delicious pizza, and drove home. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but there is no doubt. So reddit, I am a 5'6" girl who is confused on what to do. God, I wish that I am making this up; I mean I already have a satisfactory 'B' in the class. I get to see him again of Friday for our midterm. What do I do? I'm not the type who is any good at a shake down while simultaneously I cannot just turn him in? I'm generally downvoted into oblivion for my posts, but this time I REALLY need the community's support. | Math teacher recognized me as he walked out of the adult store at approximately 8:00 P.M |
t3_2zmrvr | tifu | TIFU by saying 'Hi' to my ex | This happened about an hour ago so i thought it would be a good first post.
So i got home from work and was browsing the net when i got a message on whats-app from lets call her Katrina saying 'Hi?'. Bare in mind that we had met last weekend to try and be friends which went horribly but that is another story.
So being the massive idiot i am i text 'Hi' back. I didn't really want to speak to her so i kept writing short replies to her questions and eventually Katrina asks 'Do you even like me anymore?' to which my reply is 'tbh i have had enough'. This is where everything goes to shit.
So Katrina starts having a go at me saying i put her through shit and she never knew why she went out with me and loads of shit like that and eventually it turned into threats. Katrina said 'You won't see me anymore and if you do i will beat the shit out of you and so will David' (David is not the real name of her new boyfriend).
So then i was sitting at home thinking it will never happen and i will not see them again and then i remember... i work in the town they live in. | Got a message from my ex, replied, got into an argument, now she and her new boyfriend want my guts. |
t3_2h68fv | running | Training while injured, help? | I'm a sophomore high school cross country athlete, by no means any good. In a race, my ankle began to hurt and after an X-ray and an MRI we figured out I have a stress reaction, which is basically a precursor to a stress fracture. I've been out for about a week and a half now, and I'm walking pain free, but according to the doctors I need to spend at least two more weeks without running. I'd love to be able to catch up once I come back in for the last two weeks of my season, since I left just as my (and my teammates) times were beginning to rise a **lot**. Does anyone have any good tips or exercises to me that could facilitate that? | I'm injured and I need advice on how to properly stay in shape so I can come back not too far behind. |
t3_2u5uph | tifu | TIFU by playing a game with my gf's family | TIFU on Christmas Eve (sorry not today), and we decided to play a board game. I can't remember the name but it goes like this: someone is delegated as the reader and draws a card. The card says something, and each person writes their answer on a piece of paper, and passes them to the reader. The reader reads them out loud, and you take turns guessing who you think wrote them. If someone guesses you right, you get points and the person is eliminated, except the reader cannot be eliminated, and they also don't guess.
Let me say the family is also very Catholic.
OK so someone draws one that reads: "What is better late than never?". People write their guesses and pass them in. Everyone has these answers that are funny but then one is read and it said, "(Insert gf's name here)'s period". The room went silent and I sat there in awkwardness. | Girf's dad likes his daughter's period to be late, rather than never. |
t3_y49ca | AskReddit | What awkward situation have you been in, that should not be awkward? | The other I was home alone, and I felt a little tired so I decided to take a nap. I went to my room and I decided I would go commando for my nap, because it is more comfortable. Of course I was browsing reddit beforehand, and while browsing my dad comes home. He says hi, I respond, and he immediately walks upstairs to chat (I am not really sure why he came up to visit, he usually just goes about his business and doesn't come upstairs, so that was abnormal as it is.) So I am sitting there, computer on my lap, clothes on the floor, and it looks like I was just furiously masturbating. So I know that my dad thinks I was masturbating, but I was just sitting there minding my own business. The situation became extremely awkward, even though there was no reason for it to be, since I was just napping with my computer. He just stood there waiting for me to break the silence, it was damn awkward.
So Reddit, what awkward situation have you encountered that should not have been awkward in the first place? | Dad caught me napping but thought I was masturbating. |
t3_1ogz13 | relationships | She [30F] has abandonment issues, but I [28M] want to break up... (8 months) | It was a lot of fun at first, but things have gotten too serious far too quickly for my tastes. After giving this a lot of thought, I think it needs to end.
She has severe anxiety about the idea of a breakup. When she was 19, her boyfriend (of four years) drowned while they were swimming together. Pretty tragic.
She got married to another guy at 24, but he left her a little over a year ago. They have a son (6) together; he's a great kid, and has a good relationship with both his parents.
After the divorce, and largely as a result of her first boyfriend's tragic death, she has _severe_ anxiety related to the idea of being left alone.
This isn't why I want to leave her-- there are other, far less cruel reasons-- but my mind is made up.
I care deeply about her, and I want to do this in a way that causes her as little pain as possible.
We don't live together, but we see each other every day, and spend most nights together.
What can I do here? | she has severe abandonment issues, for good reason. I want out, while hurting her as little as possible. |
t3_4ma4ip | relationships | My boyfriend (21M) got an internship and I (21F) miss talking to him | My boyfriend of 3 years got a pretty good summer internship in computer science. He started a couple weeks ago. I started my summer service immersion a week ago. He's living with his parents in one state, and I'm in an apartment in the state where we both go to college.
Early in the summer, when neither of us had any commitments, we'd text back and forth a bit during the day and call twice a week. Those conversations were the highlight of my day. They don't really happen much anymore. My boyfriend is at work or commuting to work from 7 am to 6 pm, whereas my hours are only 9 to 4. I text him during my lunch break and yearn for a response, and I don't get any. He apparently leaves his phone off during the day. Once he gets home, he has dinner with his family and spends time with his younger siblings. If he gets back to my texts, it's way late at night after I've gone to sleep. We haven't had a proper text conversation since he started his internship. We've connected on the phone maybe once, on a Saturday.
I was especially lonely during the week before my service project, but even though my hours are now occupied, I can't stop thinking about him and how much I miss him. I like my work, but I want to talk about it to someone and he just isn't there. I'm lonely and don't really know what to do with all my social energy. I have a couple friends in the area but they work during the day too and are only available on weekends, and they usually go out and do stuff I'm not interested in. So, after work every day, I'm just sitting on my butt watching Family Feud. It gets a bit lonely sometimes.
I feel like I'm stifling my boyfriend with a bunch of unanswered text messages. I'm always looking at my phone hoping he'll answer. I hate being so clingy and desperate. What can I do? | I miss talking to my boyfriend while we're apart this summer and I don't know what to do. |
t3_24g7j7 | relationships | How to comfort/be there for friend who just broke off engagement? | My two good friends Jack and Katie (M24 & F24, obvi not their real names) just broke off their 5 year long engagement. My SO and I are best friends with them both. Katie was the one who ended things, but we are closer to Jack and his family. It was an amicable breakup but hard for both parties involved. They have comingled their finances, and like any breakup, it's a bit messy logistically.
I haven't talked to katie yet since this just happened last night, but how can I be there for her without being cliche/trite with advice? What are some ways I can help her (food, movies, ice cream) and be there for her, and likewise, how can we be there for Jack?
I don't want to give her stupid advice and honestly she doesn't need it and probably doesn't want it, and there's really nothing to say. It was for the best and I think all parties involved know it. She is really busy, but I didn't know if taking her to dinner, spending time with her, just calling and letting her know I'm at her disposal would be helpful?
It's a tough situation since we're good friends with both, and don't want to lose either relationship but also don't want to become the middle man. | How to comfort friends who broke off their engagement without words? |
t3_11t8vg | AskReddit | I just sharted in a room full of houseguests. What's the most embarrassing moment you've experienced in front of houseguests? | So, about 4 hours ago I was asked to program a bluray player for my family because they had some friends over for a cheese and wine party. I crouched down, in my element. Rocking back and forth on my haunches, I expertly manipulated this machinery and as my deft fingers applied the final touch, I felt a stirring.
Of course, me being my cocky self, I thought it would be fun to let out a little peep to let my house guests know who was in charge.
Instead, what followed was not a fart, but a full on explosive shit into my undergarments. What makes it even worse was that I was wearing simple pajama pants and let me tell you this, they are porous like a motherfucker. | I violently shit my pants infront of houseguests. |
t3_lkdu4 | relationship_advice | Girl I'm dating texts with another guy. I'm afraid our relationship exists only because he doesn't live here. | I've been dating this girl for about two months. We've been sexually active fairly regularly, we do things together at least 4 or 5 times per week, it's really almost as if she and I are exclusive, however, she doesn't want to take that step just yet. I've brought it up to her before, but she said she didn't want to get into a more exclusive relationship because she was engaged and the guy turned out to be a complete asshole. I'm very thoughtful to her, so I really don't see how that's related, but perhaps someone can provide an insight.
Since we initially started dating, I found that she was texting with another guy, who apparently doesn't live here. I figured that since she and I spent quite a bit of time together, she would eventually stop texting him, seeing as though it was more apparent that she and I would become more exclusive. Well, we had taken a trip together and I discovered that she was texting with him while we were on our trip and she alluded to pleasuring him if he were with her. Then again, last night, she received a series of text messages from him - I knew it was him when I looked over at the phone and saw his name.
I have this feeling that she's not spending time with me because she wants to see where things go with me. I feel like she does enjoy spending time with me, the sex is great and I'm really good company, but I don't feel like she's spending time with me because she wants to see if I'm relationship material. I feel like if this other guy was in our town, she'd be seeing him instead.
I want to ask her who he is and get her to explain the situation to me. I don't want to think of her as just someone to spend my time with and fuck, because I could see myself building real feelings for this girl. I don't think I could have her texting him should we become more, since I know that she had exchanged romantic texts with him. | Girl is texting with a guy, distant about the whole relationship thing. |
t3_3i12mw | tifu | TIFU by getting a kid stuck in a tree. | Alright. This actually happened just and hour and a half ago. So, after I came home from shopping all day, I get greeted by my neighbors 5 year old son. Let me point out two things. One, my neighbors aren't too friendly with anyone down the block. Two, I've seen this kid in action. A little popcorn headed shit that looks like he downed two cans of Redbull and did serious cocaine, who always goes and picks your flowers saying they smell like weird grapes. But he's a kid.. I can't complain. I take notice his parents are hauling groceries in the house, so I decide to distract him while they get the job done, little devil shit free. After he says hi, he immediately asks if I know how to climb a tree. I awkwardly say sure, and I ask him if he can. And I swear to a god I half way believe in, THIS LITTLE SHIT CLIMBS MY NEIGHBORS 50 FOOT TREE, ALMOST TO THE TOP. Yes, he almost fell. Yes, the fire fighters had to come,as did the sheriff. Yes, I got a stern talking to by the doughnut man, telling me not to tell kids not to climb a tree. How was I supposed to know? Not to mention Magoo coming over and saying he'd like it if I never spoke to his son again. | I make awkward conversation with a five year old only to have him climb a 50 foot tree. Get talked to by the sheriff and dad. Pretty sure they had their dog shit on my flowers. Also positive they hate me even more now. |
t3_3wkm7u | relationships | I [17M] am head over heels for a girl [17F] who is in a labelless relationship with a guy [16M] | Dear Reddit,
For about a year now I've been absolutely entranced by a girl called "Eve". She's so charismatic and full of energy not to mention intelligent and gorgeous, no person has made me feel as warm inside as she does.
I've been interested in Eve for a long time but whenever I pluck up the courage to express myself she's been on the tail end of some kind of emotional turmoil so it just hasn't felt appropriate, much of this turmoil has been caused by a guy named "Steve" who has managed to stay off her blacklist with claims of depression and by manipulating her goodwill. Although I think sometimes she appreciates the attention. A couple of months ago a guy called "Pete" messaged her after one of her fallings out with Steve and supported her, I have also tried this and even though she has figured out I'm into her and has expressed an interest in me we've never gotten any further than a date which she had to cancel because she had other commitments.
Eve and Pete have dated on and off since and are currently in a "labelless relationship" because Pete says he doesn't want the responsibility. Eve is often unhappy with her relationship and Pete has seriously hurt her a number of times but for whatever reason stays with Pete and always comes back to him in the end. Recently I have tried properly talking to her again but at a recent party a guy who is also into Eve let on that I'm really into her and she replied "yep it's just like Steve".
I don't know whether it was the alcohol talking but it hurt to hear. But it made me decide one thing, I'm not going to let this girl escape me again when I know I could make her happy and give her the commitment that Pete won't give her.
Reddit, help me get with this girl at least so I can put these feelings behind me. | Should I and how should I approach asking her out? |
t3_b3fez | AskReddit | Need advice/tips on living/studying in a foreign country! | Hello there reddit! I'm currently a sophomore in high school (Year/Grade 10) and I've been studying Japanese at school for a few years. Recently, I've been asked to participate in a foreign exchange program in which I would spend one semester of my junior year in a Japanese public school. As you might have guessed, I'm pretty nervous! My Japanese is coming along pretty nicely, but there's no doubt I won't understand much/everything that I hear or read. One of my best friends is also going to participate in the same program, and it's more than likely that we'll be going to the same school and classes.
Reddit, I'm sure this is going to be one of the coolest experiences I'll have but I have to say, I'm a bit nervous. If anyone here has any advice or useful knowledge about Japan, please share! | Going to japan as a foreign exchange student, need advice. |
t3_4yn33x | relationships | I [19F] have the biggest fear to have sex | I don't even care about aids or virginity or society standards, is just that it's getting so common in my city that girls younger than me or my age are getting pregnant and I can't wrap my head around that.
Even if I find a guy that I love enough to do it, I feel like I'm gonna freak out because I know condoms not always work and freaking "love, Rosie" movie, teached me that the day after pill, is no 100% effective.
I would never risk myself to get pregnant, I don't even know if I wanna have kids. A lot of my friends have sex and nothing happens but I'm afraid if I do it it's gonna happen to me.
Guess I'm going to be a virgen till marriage or death | I feel like whenever I decide to have sex I'm gonna get pregnant |
t3_q6gjr | Advice | I need advice with college related problems | I'm currently in the second semester of my freshman year at a state university. I really like being at college, but at the very sight of work I get completely stressed out. Like crawl inside a hole and die stressed out, and of course being so stressed makes me depressed to the point where I will just lie in bed for a week. I've played the bass guitar and I kind of want to be in a band when I grow up, and there is a music college that is really easy to get into near by. So I was wondering if you guys think I should transfer there or not. | I'm not really liking college and wondering if I should transfer. |
t3_3e2d85 | relationships | My [28 F] best friend [27 F] of several years continues to criticize me and being negative | For the last few months, I know my best friend has been struggling with depression and her relationship situation. She has a lot of issues. At the same time, I've gone through many major changes in my life, and while having psychological problems, my life is headed in a good direction.
However, I feel that my friend never really lets me share things from my life, and when I tell her something I'm happy or proud about, I feel that she always criticizes me and talk about how she would do it, implying that she would do it better (for example working out). She always makes assumptions on what I'm talking about, and I basically have to argue for her to actually listen to what I'm trying to say.
On the topic of working out, she was adamant that weight training was the most beneficial, and I had to reiterate several times how I want to combine cardio with weight training. This is just an example, she does this with a lot of things. Basically being a bit of a know-it-all because she doesn't let me finish before going on about how to do it "correctly".
It has come to the point that I'm starting to avoid her and dreading running in to her, because that means I have to talk to her. She also has a tendency to talk a lot, for a long time. I feel like I'm being a bad friend for this bothering me, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. At the same time, I feel like her criticism of me is due to her being jealous of my life going better than hers. | my best friend is going through a rough time (and has for a long time), and I feel that she's acting selfish and being arrogant. I'm starting to avoid her because I feel like I can't put up with it any more. |
t3_2ygtvi | tifu | TIFU by forgetting to turn off my security system | Alright so like most of of these this did not happen today but actually happened about 2 years ago.
I came home from football practice and no one was home. I come from a family of seven so I was pretty excited about having some peace and quiet for once. I open up the door and the alarm starts to go off. The way these alarms work is that you have about 30 seconds from the time you set off the alarm to turn it off or else the police will be notified and they will call your house and see if everything is alright. Well I was pretty tired from practice and I did not get to the alarm before it notified the police. I waited for the police to call the house, but after about 5 or 10 min I decided that they weren't going to call so I got in the shower because I was pretty gross from practice.
While in the shower, I began hearing some noises downstairs and some yelling. I turned off the shower and began listened for more noise. Those were not the voices of my family. Immediately, I thought that there was an intruder in my house and I started mildly panicking. Here I was, in my bathroom, completely naked. I was essentially defenseless. I wrapped a towel around my waist, slowly opened the bathroom door, and called out asking who was there.
"POLICE, FREEZE! COME DOWN SLOWLY WITH YOUR HANDS ABOVE YOUR HEAD!"
fuck.
I came out of the bathroom and slowly made my way down the stairs. I had one hand up in the air and the other one holding up my towel. When I made it down the stairs I saw 3 officers with their guns trained on me and they began asking me questions about who I was, what was I doing there, that kind of thing. I nearly crapped myself when I saw all those guns trained on me and I totally thought I was going to jail naked.
After what felt like an eternity of being interrogated, my dad happened to get home and he explained to the officers that I was his son and that everything was fine. The officers looked back at me, started laughing, and left. My parents still make fun of me for it and I don't blame them | I forgot to turn off the alarm, got in my shower, and was almost arrested for home invasion while naked. |
t3_2ofqnj | relationship_advice | GF (32/F) wants to get married with me (28/M) after 1 week of dating. | So I met this girl who was on a business trip from another country (taiwan). We hooked up soon after meeting. 1 week later and also a few days before she needs to return to her country she asked me if I wanted to get married.
I love her a lot, but then again I'm kind of a schmosby kind of guy. I can see myself being with her for the rest of my life as I feel very much myself around her.
She has only had 3 boyfriends. First was long distance, second was a 7 year relationship that ended when the guy proposed to her and she rejected him. I asked her why she did that and she herself doesn't really understand and just say perhaps there was something missing in their relationship.
I will say I am skeptical if she just wants to get married to immigrate to the US, but I've heard taiwanese people don't really care for such things as much as mainland chinese.
In the end I told her we should wait and see after keeping in contact for 6 months. I do see marrying her as a way for her to come here as well and would gladly accept to do so. | Hooked up with foreign girl and after 1 week she wants to get married. She's now back in her home country, and I'm giving this relationship 6 months before I decide what to do. |
t3_4fa6z5 | relationships | My exgirlfriend (F20) wants me back because she realized leaving me (M20) was a huge mistake | Her and I dated for almost a year and we fighted a lot. It was a normal relationship with its ups and downs. We had a great time with each other but toward the end it got messy. We both started distancing ourselves from each other and we eventually agreed that a breakup was nessesary. After we broke up she started seeing another guy and the started messing around. They had a lot of sex and whatnot then they started dating. I hooked up with my friend but nothing else came of it and it wad the end of that. A few days ago she called me up and she said that she couldn't be with this new guy anymore because there was no spark, she wanted me back.
I met up with her and I told her that I would consider getting back together with her but I wanted to know that she'd change for the better. She had problems in our last relationship. She lied more often than she should have. She swears she never cheated on me and I know she didn't, and she was always sketchy about who she was texting.
I told her that we should hangout over the summer and see if we felt the same feelings like before and maybe if it wasn't going to work out, then we wouldn't date. She agreed and we are going to try agian at our relationship. In my opinion, its worth a chanve. I told her that im not f'ing around with her agian and that im serious. I also told her that i wouldnt be afriad to leave her and that its in her hands to change for the better.
I just wanted to share my situation with someone else. | Trying to kinder a relationship with my ex who realized she fucked up by leaving me. Working things out together. I really feel like she wants to change |
t3_1yt8ak | relationships | I [22/F] am moving across the country from my bf [25/M] of 4 months, should we even bother? | So, I have been dating this guy for a little over 4 months. We were very close friends for 5 years prior to dating. When we started dating I was already searching for grad schools outside of the area, and we knew that if I got accepted, our relationship would not be a reason for me to stay behind and not pursue my dreams. Anyway, I did get accepted to my top choice, but it is literally on the other side of the country. His salary and a grad school stipend arent exactly enough to cover plane ticket costs, so we would rarely see each other.
He is a great boyfriend, but this whole situation is causing me so much stress that I cant enjoy the time we have now. Plus, we are very different and eventually, I do think we would break up because of it.
Should we even bother? | Moving across the country from bf, is it worth it to continue? |
t3_wrwya | relationships | My low self esteem has put my relationship into a tailspin... but I'm working on it. | I'm a [21M] dating a [20F], and we've been together for about a year.
To make a long story as short as possible, some stuff happened around the turn of the new year for me. Since then I've been struggling, which has strained our relationship. I've not been able to accept her support and have been fighting depression (which I honestly didn't realize). I struggled to accept her love and help while I constantly feared I wasn't good enough for her, and this has been a cause for a number of fights over the past three months. A couple of weeks ago, we got into a very emotional discussion with eachother and almost broke up, but neither of us actually wanted to go through with it. Despite the rough months, we still love each other and have been best friends for quite some time. So we agreed to work it out.
It felt wonderful, we aired everything amongst one another and decided to work on the core of our friendship (which we agreed felt lost during a great deal of this period). At the same time, I vowed to build myself back up. And while it felt better, and in many ways I'm feeling better, I am still afraid that all of this was too little too late. Things have felt off since then, and while I'm sure that's to be expected, it's still unsettling to me. Is it just a matter of allowing time to heal this?
I was hoping someone else would have perspective on this. Also, I would like to ask if there's anything else I can do specifically for myself that anyone could recommend? I've joined /r/NoFap and am going back to the gym. I'm reading books like "The Art of Loving." I want to make this work, and I know she does too. | While I battled depression and low self esteem, caused some rough times in my relationship with my girlfriend, and while I know she still loves me, I struggle to believe it. Will time heal this relationship with hard work? And how can we work on our relationship together, and how can I work on myself? |
t3_2h0y0a | tifu | Tifu by puking on the train on a girl I like. | So last night I was having pre drinks with this girl I like before heading out nightclubbing. It was going well and I was really excited to go out. I was dressed up, make up perfect, bits shaved ready for a night of partying and hopefully getting laid.
Made plans to meet at my fave club with my best friend who I haven't seen in a month and I was missing her so badly. Then I fell asleep on this girl I was with when we were catching a train into the city. Woke up and puked in my hands, we had to get off the train and I puked fucking everywhere, it was horrible. We take the train back home and she puts me to bed and then catches a taxi to a guy she's seeing while I puke in the toilet. | Drank too many pre drinks, pucked in hands on the train and had to go home. Ruined the night and lost all chances with the girl I like. |
t3_546emr | relationships | I [28F] have a huge crush on one of my few local friends [25F] and I don't know how to proceed. | Background: I first met B a few years ago when I was in grad school and spent a semester where she was an undergrad, and we we both in a couple of campus clubs. We hung out mostly in groups because she obviously was a lot busier (being local) but we got on well. I had a small crush on her at the time but mostly ignored it because I knew I would only be in her country for a few months, and at the time the age difference seemed a lot bigger. We stayed in contact after I left, initially as part of various group texts/online comments, but we had a bunch in common and started communicating more one-on-one over the time.
A couple of years ago, I moved to the same city, and we started hanging out in person, and my crush has only grown larger, and I don't know how to proceed.
I don't think she's into me at all (though I admit to being a terrible judge of that due to basically no history of dating people) so I don't think we're going to end up dating, and I can't decide of I should tell her or not. As it stands, while I would love to date her, I am perfectly happy remaining friends, but I worry that
if I told her I'm romantically interested, she might think that we can't continue to be close friends, and that would suck. Aside from valuing her friendship in and of itself, I'm incredibly shy and only have a few of friends in this city, and I don't want to lose one (and some of them are also her friends, and I don't want to make things even more awkward)
I feel like I'm over thinking this, and also that I should be over this kind of teenage crush, but I'm kind of stuck. Should I be upfront with her about it, or not? | I have a giant crush on a close friend, and worry about losing her friendship if I tell her about it. |
t3_25b6v2 | relationships | Update: My boyfriend[22M] of 1.5 yrs impulsively broke up with me [23F] the other night. Need advice | Original:
Still taking things pretty hard. He doesnt want to talk to me. Its really weird going from seeing someone everyday and them being your best friend to not having them there at all, which has been the worst part (there were no warning signs either). I don't want him gone from my life. I've been in therapy for the last several months, so I've been trying to deal with it there. Recently I've started experiencing auditory hallucinations for the first time. I feel like I'm going crazy. I can't stop crying either especially since yesterday was supposed to be moving day for us. I don't know how to cope. My roommate looks at me like I'm crazy for being upset and I should just be over it.
Does anyone have any advice on coping? | Having a really hard time coping with the impulsive break up. Thing thats getting to me the most is that he was my best friend. Started having auditory hallucinations. How do I cope? |
t3_3cx9t4 | relationships | She[39F] said yes to dating me[29M] a few days ago then changed mind? | So heres the dealeo,
I met this girl at a bar a couple weeks ago and we really hit it off. We went out on a few awesome dates together, and then last Friday things got a little frisky. We were both really fucked up and thought it wasn't the best timing. The following Tuesday things start getting frisky again and I drop the "hey do you want to date" card on her.
After talking about it for a few minutes she says YES! So that was awesome! Anyways fast forward to Friday, we're out to dinner and she says she can't date anyone right now. The last guy she was with was an ex-boss of hers. They dated a bit after she left her company but not while she was working there. Long story short, this girl got let go at her old job and all the friends she made at her job stopped talking to her and she has no idea why. She doesn't know if it has something to do with her ex-boss or what.
After talking to a close friend of hers, she realized that she's not over the whole situation and doesn't feel she should date anyone until she is. I was cool with the whole situation and understood. The thing is I am still interested as this girl is pretty freeking awesome. I just don't know if waiting around is the best thing for me to do or what. We still talk and hang out a ton too. What do you guys/gals think? | She said yes, then changed her mind a few days later. |
t3_2yc8ju | relationships | Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 7 years, lost passion | Hi,
I've been with my current girlfriend for 7 years since high school. Things haven't always been smooth, but we've managed to get through some tough times, including temporary moves to different countries. In that respect, to our friends and family, we seem like a pretty tough and stable couple.
However, over the past few months things have declined to the point where I don't feel like holding hands, kissing etc. I don't know how it's gotten to this point, but I can't seem to shake this feeling. My girlfriend has made me aware of this (I had been ignoring the situation, probably because I didn't want to face the reality), and I now need to make a decision as to whether to carry on the relationship or not.
My girlfriend is a truly amazing person. She's my best friend, and I spend most of my free time with her. We share a lot in common, and our future aspirations align with one another. It would be really heartbreaking for me, as well as for her, for us to split up.
On the other hand, this feeling has been lingering for a while now, and I'm not treating her as a boyfriend should treat his girlfriend. We've had a couple of similar phases in the past two years which have resulted in her convincing me to stay, but the feeling always seems to creep back. I don't want to be in the same position as I am now in a year's time.
I understand that the grass is greener where you water it, so I'm really not sure whether I should indeed continue, or whether it's time to bring things to a close.
Any help would be appreciated. | Lost passion for girlfriend of 7 years. Not sure if I should try and patch things up or move on. |
t3_21rb0i | offmychest | I'm not an animal person | We've had two dogs for most of my childhood, and I've probably been the least attached to either of them. I don't dislike them and would never and have never done anything to hurt them, but they're kind of an annoyance.
Maybe I'm the animal version of /r/childfree.
I kind of don't get the whole pet thing, I guess. I mean, this is going to sound insensitive but there are people > animals. So I would rather pay for a human's medical care than an animals'. There are people dying of preventable diseases everyday, and we're paying hundreds to a vet because our dumb-ass cat choked on a sock.
And the thing is, I'm not afraid of animals and while it's not a particular interest of mine to do animal things, I don't dislike doing things that involve wild/zoo animals. I've sincerely enjoyed swimming with sting rays and whatever. It doesn't freak me out.
I have a policy that if a bug is in my house, I'm going to kill it. They can do whatever they want when I'm camping (that's their territory), but my house has been in the same spot for 200 years and they should get the fuck out. I'm really quick with a shoe, to be honest.
But take me to a farm or a pet store and I'm utterly bored by all of them. I don't have feelings of affection toward them, if that makes sense. And I think I see pets in particular as a hassle and an overall annoyance.
Here's the other thing. I'm a vegetarian because of the inhumane way animals are treated in the food industry. I'm not trying to make a big deal of it, but it feels morally wrong to support the meat industry. | I'm a vegetarian who's not an animal person. |
t3_fcqgn | AskReddit | Would you watch a video of me, topless, in the snow, playing hockey and racing a horse (on foot) for charity? | This is odd, I'm using a throwaway account to do something that CAN be traced to me. Heh. And, sorry, I'm a guy. [Here's the video](
So, I made this video last year. I do the polar plunge every year. It raises money for the Special Olympics. Lots of money. I know some people aren't fans of SO, but I think they do good work. Feel free to argue. Also, feel free to tell me which subreddit you think this belongs in instead, but I feel like this is the best place and I spent a lot of time here. On my normal, shadowy account. | Watch a hopefully funny video and consider helping the Special Olympics* |
t3_2wx0vt | relationships | My [25M] Girlfriend [23F] had been texting her ex while I was gone this weekend. Need advice. | So dating my girlfriend for 11 months now and it couldn't have been going any better. I came home last night from a trip out of town and went to play Fruit Ninja on her iPad while waiting for her and it opened to her messages. I saw she had recently had a conversation with an ex that she knows doesn't want to just be friends. Now it was mostly harmless on her part, she makes it fairly clear she just wants to be friends, but he had tried to get her to cheat on me Friday night but she was saying no. Where it doesn't seem so harmless and where it hurts me a bit is she felt like shit for saying no and she said "It kills me you know that saying no isn't easy." This hurts because with me whenever someone wants to do something with me I don't even think about it, I say no. It's easy for me because I can't fathom doing something that would hurt her.
Background: her and him were good friends then dated, he cheated on her in the relationship. A while later he cheated on his new girlfriend with her.
Last night I gave her opportunities to admit to him talking to her, not wanting to be just friends, and him wanting her to do something with him, but she denied it all. This morning I told her I had seen the messages and she said she just didn't want to make me uncomfortable or upset, but the lying to my face is what makes it worse.
Need advice, thanks everyone. | my 11mo. Girlfriends ex texted her, he wanted her to cheat on me she said no. However, she felt "like shit for saying no" and "that saying no isn't easy". Lied to me about talking to him. |
t3_4cv4g7 | relationships | When my (31f) husband (33m) looks at sexy stuff (nsfw) on reddit, I get super insecure. How do I not let this get to me? | When my husband looks at nsfw posts of girls on reddit...with their perfect tits, natural look, gorgeous bodies...I get SUPER insecure with myself.
We had our first baby 1 year ago and I'm still 10 lbs away from my pre-pregnanxy weight. I work out 4-6 days a week, depending if I get enough rest with the baby waking up through the night and I also work full time.
Of course, husband is gorgeous and his body is perfect...so I truly do only have eys for him. I know that this doesn't work like this for guys...they are mostly visual and prefer a hot woman to look at. Well, I'm not totally there yet...even though he says I am. So, when I notice the links he's been clicking, and we have sex like one a week or less, even with me initiating...I get really weird feelings about it.
I may never get the chance to look like those girls...but I am working my ass off to at least try.
How can I not let this get in my head and bring me down? I know it's natural for him to enjoy seeing women like that...and I don't want him to feel ashamed for it...but I want to be able to accept it. We've talked about if before, but the conclusion was that I'm over-reacting to something natural and I shouldn't let it bother me. BUT IT DOES AND I CAN'T STOP THAT FEELING.
I told him that I want more intimacy and I want to be seen and looked at like one of those girls he clicks (he doesn't pm them or anything...we totally trust and respect each other). He agrees with that too, but it STILL bothers me for some srupid, neurotic reason. Am I out of options? Any tips for being a big girl and getting over this?
I'm on mobile, so please forgive any typos! | Husband looks at nsfw sexy content and when I notice it...it really hits my confidence. I'm working out and working towards my own sexy goals, but I feel like I'll never compare to the girls he looks at. How do I handle the confidence issue for something that is so natural for humans to do and shouldn't be an issue? |
t3_3f25cc | tifu | TIFU by not having FB on my phone. | Currently travelling through Europe with a friend of mine, and we've just been in Budapest for a day. After a pubcrawl we ended up in Club Instant, where I met this girl (I'll call her Becca, because that was her name).
Queue chitchat, tequila, dancing, making out, and hanging in one of the side rooms. She was there with friends though, and they wanted to leave, so she had to go. Okay, too bad, but cool... Want to meet up for drinks tomorrow? Yeah, sure, let's get in touch through Facebook.
So I pull out my phone, only to realise I don't have the FB app installed anymore. She shows me her profile, and tells me to add her later.
Halfway to my hostel my somewhat drunken mind realises it's probably a good idea to at the very least write her surname down, so I can actually find her. Great idea, except that I'd already forgotten her surname's intricacies.
So I write down something that's vaguely similar, and figure I'll just work it out tomorrow.
>Side TIFU: my 'friend' had the key to our hostel, and was lying somewhere in Budapest, completely knocked out. Had to resort to a metro station in order to get some sleep until the reception opened. Those were 5 bloody awful hours.
I just spent the better part of an afternoon manually brute forcing the Facebook search function with all comprehensible variations of her name I can come up with, but alas: too many Beccas in the UK. Doubt I'll be seeing her again... | Don't care about privacy, Facebook is essential for your every day night life. |
t3_txezo | AskReddit | Google / Facebook: Stop selling data, start selling honest products to your users | I like communicating through social networks, it's the way our generation communicates. I love to share things and I love to use high end products on the web.
What I don't like is that services like Facebook and Google, which have probably the most advanced products on the market treat their users like shit. They're breaking amendments(e.g. Like Button), they're dishonest and they sell your deepest secrets to anyone who pays enough.
I deleted my Facebook 1 year ago, but I still have the need to communicate (job/private) through social networks. Since there aren't many alternatives to Facebook (basically they have a monopole) I'm forced to use them and I want to use them because their product is amazing. Same with Google, I use quite a lot of their services and I'm very happy with them, but I just don't like that they are selling my data to who knows whom.
**MY REQUEST**
Offer Premium services. I am willing to pay e.g. 5€/$ per month to get the certainty that my data will be only used to improve my personal experience of the products.
I want to have insight on all the data that is being collected on me and I want full control over it(delete what ever you want/disable data collection).
People that don't want/can't pay 5/month will still be able to use the service, but under the circumstance that their data will be sold for advertisement purposes.
I don't know how much they make of selling my usage data to advertisers, but I can't imagine that they will go bankrupt by offering honest services.
**What does Reddit think, would you be willing to pay for Facebook/Google? | Make social networks social. Offer premium service for x $/Month and give premium users full control over the data being collected on them. |
t3_35ggxv | relationships | Me (F21) telling my bf (21) I kinda liked a girl, he said I should go ahead and kiss her if I feel like. Should I be worry cuz he is so easy going about it? LDR | So that's pretty much it, I wonder if no jealousy at all is actually good. We're about 10,000 km away, we're together for one year already. A bit of background, I kissed and make out with a guy before, I told my bf and we had discussion that ended all good, clear and no bad feelings, we talked about being with someone else but we decided not to do it at the end.
I met a girl I felt very attracted to, told my bf and he said he wants me to enjoy myself, and is all fine cuz she is a girl and I'm not lesbian. I am not indeed, I'm just very attracted and I always wanted to see how it is, and also have a threesome if possible.
I love my and he knows it and he loves me too, I just worry cuz maybe this could also be that he doesn't care. I asked and he said he does care but he wants me happy. Should I just believe it and let it go? | boyfriend is not jealous at all, he says he loves me and I should not worry cuz we're fine but I worry still |
t3_39ev3x | relationships | Me [18 F] with my friend [18 F], talking to her always depresses me and I'm not sure what to do about it. | I've been friends with Cathy for several years now. A rather large part of our relationship has been her seeking advice regarding her problems or just generally venting about her life. I'm not naturally inclined to talking about myself, and she definitely is. Lately, this trend has intensified due to her poor grades, lack of a boyfriend, weight gain, and general self esteem issues. In response to this I've tried to help her in small ways, such as helping her find an internship this summer which she initially seemed to be enjoying. Today, however, she told me that she finds it too challenging, which scares her, makes her doubt herself, and apparently adds to her existing self esteem issues.
I should add that we've definitely had fun times together, and I don't want to cut ties altogether.
In general I'm a pretty happy and optimistic person but I've found that whenever I've hung out with her recently, I come away quite sad. Mostly because any time I try to introduce some more substantive conversation topic, it always ends up circling back to how pathetic she feels her life is, which makes me in turn consider the problems in my own life.
I even suggested therapy. She insisted that she's not depressed but is simply sarcastic and has a poor attitude. She told me that others have told her that she's depressing to be around, and I fear the consequences of me - one of her closest friends (she's referred to me as her best friend before) - reinforcing that. I suggested that voicing negative thoughts may magnify them, but I'm not sure if she really got the hint.
What should I do? I need to safeguard my own mental health, but I want to help her as well. I'm not sure that it's my place to outright suggest that she's depressed though. | A friend of mine is either depressed or just has an extremely negative attitude, and I always come away from conversations with her in a bad mood. Starting to feel both like a therapist and someone who needs therapy myself. Not sure what to do. |
t3_4xf7e2 | personalfinance | Should I take out unsubsidized federal student loans if I don't HAVE to? | Hello pf, I start college soon and from the estimates I've made so far my scholarships and grants pay for enough my tuition, housing, and insurance for this semester to leave ~2000 dollars left to loans and cash.
My financial package for this semester offers:
$1750 federal subsidized loan
$1000 federal unsubsidized loan
both with interest rates of 3.76% according to [this link] at least
I currently have 3000 in the bank, and if everything goes smoothly over the next week I will have 4000 saved up.
Currently I was thinking that I would take out the full subsidized loan because the interest is paid while I'm in school and the amount is relatively little and pay for the rest in my cash. I will also have to pay for books this semester, however I estimate my book cost will only be about 150-200 dollars at most if I can't find any free options online. This leaves me with about 300-500 dollars of expenses to pay for out of pocket for this semester out of my 3000-4000 I have in the bank.
I was wondering, however, what pf would think of also taking out the 1000 unsub loan as well since it is a very low interest rate and would help keep me flexible in case shit hits the fan throughout the semester, as I will have money in the bank if I need it. My dad has agreed to pay for my food costs, as I will be doing my own cooking, but that could change and I like knowing that I have a cushion in the bank. Also this is my first semester in college, so I have no idea what other unforeseen expenses I may have to pay for. | should I take out unsubsidized federal loans at 3.76% interest and keep my cash in the bank, or should I just dip into my savings and pay for it out of pocket? |
t3_nj8f0 | GetMotivated | My New Project | I've been reading this subreddit for some time now, looking at all of the motivated wolves ready to kick some ass and take some names. I hope every single one of them succeeds, but I can't help but wonder if they will really accomplish what they set out to do. We've all been here: so motivated from an awesome speech, movie, quote, book, etc. but, we lose sight of the goal and slack off until another motivational reddit post fires up our hearts again. What I see here is a vicious cycle of highs and lows. I'm starting a new "project" to see if I can successfully get out of this cycle of, let's face it, procrastination and shame.
Moments ago, I created a reddit account, so I can let all of you wolves know that there is someone trying to find the secret. I'm on no motivational "high," I'm simply level-headed at the moment. Any informational/motivational books, videos, etc. that I come across that help me reach this goal I will share.
My plan is to create a journal and log my achievements, my failures (and how I got through them), and my emotions at all of the times. I don't know if everyone does this, and I hope this isn't a cliche that every new wolf decides that they'll do. I'm not successful in almost any way right now: with girls, money, college, band, friends, leadership, family, and many more. I want to be successful, and I want to show how (hopefully) a successful person did what he did. I will not stop. I will not quit. I will not leave out details (aside from names and personal information). IF it works, this will be how an "every day normal guy" found his own way to success.
I'll probably post the project on a blog once I've written enough, unless there's some tool on reddit that I don't know about. The finished product can take months or years to really notice improvement, and it might not ever end. I'm new to reddit so be understanding. | I'm going to work as hard as a I can at everything that I do, document it, and see if I can become successful. If I do, all of my resources will be **yours**. |
t3_385q5n | relationships | My boyfriend (30) of 6 months is wonderfully attentive, but has not once called me (27/f) beautiful. | He wants to spend nearly all of his free time with me. In fact, he's a wee bit clingy.
He is obviously very sexually attracted to me--no problems there. But he has never, not one single solitary time, called me beautiful or even pretty. I'm no 10, but I clean up pretty decently. I get a fair amount of attention from men, and I mostly feel fairly attractive. BF will tell me I'm smart, funny, sweet, sexy, etc. with some frequency so he's not just totally unable to compliment me.
I know it sounds petty, but when I spend an hour getting dolled up for his benefit and get no reaction, it's kind of hurtful.
Even more petty: I feel like I am the more attractive of the two of us. At first, I wasn't 100% sure I was physically attracted to him. Now, though, he is so beautiful to me. I tell him all the time how handsome he is, and I mean it. But he never responds in kind. I am baffled!
Embarrassingly, I finally asked him the dreaded question. "Do you think I'm beautiful?" He said yes, of course. What else could he say? But he didn't have a good explanation for why he never says it, and I felt like an insecure 12-year-old for asking. He then asked if I feel beautiful, which was an interesting thing for him to ask, I thought.
I don't understand. Even IF he wasn't wowed by my looks at first (everyone has their preferred flavor) shouldn't I be beautiful to him because he is in love with me, the way he is beautiful to me because I'm in love with him? He gives every other indication of being super into me. He has broached the subject of moving in together, he talks about our future together, he wants to spend tons of time with me....what is going on? It might also be worth mentioning that he gets quite jealous when other men hit on me. | BF is attentive and seems to adore me, but never ever ever says anything nice about my appearance. |
t3_3kmdzc | tifu | TIFU by trying to save a cat from traffic | This happened a few hours ago, but I keep replaying the events over and over in my mind. I was coming home from a long day of work when I see black cat, laying in the highway moving ever so slightly. Being the animal lover I am, I quickly turned on my emergency blinkers and pulled up next to it, blocking traffic. I stumbled out of my car, rushing to the aid of the wounded animal. I soon realized this wasnt a cat... It wasn't animal at all... It was a black handbag. I walked quickly, trying to ignore the honks of the agrivated drivers whom I shared the road with. I could feel their glares burning deep into my soul. | Saw a injured cat twitching in the middle of the road, pulled up to save it only to find it was a black handbag moving in the wind... |
t3_15nlmn | relationship_advice | I (18/f) think I might have ended our (19/m) conversation poorly. | We have been together for about a month now, but we have known each other since we were fifteen and dated for about a year in hs. Our feelings for each other have never gone away and we have continued to text each other. Now we are both in college and relatively close (approx 80 mi), and have decided to take one last shot at it. We said from the beginning that if things don't work this time, we are absolutely never going to try again.
The problem is, my family moved after my graduation, to a different state, and he is now realizing how hard it is going to be for us to see each other. We haven't talked for a bit besides texting, and I thought maybe it was because he's sick/with family or the combination. We called today and talked, and I finally asked what I had wanted to: Do you think we're going to work? He said he wasn't sure (which I was hoping for him to say; I think it's good he realizes this). But then he continued about how he doesn't like calling or Skyping because he knows that we can't see each other for a while, and because he says he wants to be with me all the time but he knows he can't. A lot was covered in the call, including that he's "a pessimist, it's always going to be like this," etc. and that he generally thinks nothing good will come of his life and he is unhappy. No matter what I tried, he countered it. The basis of our conversation focused on: we can work with what we have and continue as we are, or we can break up. I kinda broke down and ended the call with, "Call me when you're ready to believe in yourself."
I'm freaking out. I want to cry, but can't. I only eat so my family won't worry, but my mom and one of my brothers can already see that something is wrong, and they can probably guess what it is. I want to call him back or at least send a text, but I have no idea what move to take. Any advice? | Had a fight with my bf, I think he may never call back if he adheres to "Call me when you're ready to believe in yourself." What should I do? |
t3_zcgo0 | loseit | NSV: An old co-worker of mine bought me two drinks while we were at a concert | Admittedly she was getting out of a long relationship, but there were plenty of other guys she could have associated herself with that evening. We've also been friends and deep down she knew that I liked her. I was definitely friend zoned until most recently. She was impressed with my physique change (even though I believe I have a long way to go).
The concert was in this small local cafe they like to call a "night club", but that's far from the truth. It's a high school hang out mostly with some trendy older people or at least music literate older folks. Some of the guys by the t-shirt stand were trying to impress the girls by grabbing onto one of the wooden beams above and doing chin ups. I've always had problems doing pull-ups / chin-ups when the bar was really high up. I suppose the 2 drinks in me decided to at least try it. I hop up with no problem and do a few, drop down, and walk away. I knew those guys were struggling and pushing off the t-shirt table to get leverage, but what a stupid way to impress someone. She's a fair amount of years older than I am, but I've always enjoyed her company. I didn't feel comfortable progressing the evening while she was still nursing a bad break up. | A female tried to get me drunk; I enjoyed getting free drinks. |
t3_yxce6 | Dogtraining | Help me teach my dog to "go home" | Hi, and thanks for the help.
I have a 2 year old that I rescued a little less than a year ago. He's anxious and easily excited but learned some basic commands easily (sit, lay, even catch a treat in the air).
He gets excited when people come over and I'm trying to teach him to "Go home," a place in the corner lined with pillows on the floor and his toys, chewables, etc. Ideally, he'd stay in this space, amuse himself with a bone or whatever for a while, and wander out some time later when he's less bothersome.
However, none of this happens. I think he doesn't really understand how to "stay." I've tried to teach him, independently of "go home," and he'll stay for about 20ft, but never to another room. Please! How can I get him to "stay", and then, ultimately, "go home"?
Here's a cute picture of my dog: | How can I get my dog to amuse himself in his corner when he becomes bothersome? |
t3_1gdc1p | relationships | Is this settling? 27m 22f | So my girlfriend and I have been together for almost two years now, and I'm thinking about popping the question. She is a great person, is pretty, has similar life goals and aspirations, and similar values.
The trouble is I've always thought of myself as more of a non traditional kind of guy. I legitimately have qualms with the institution of marriage, the enshrinement of monogamy, and a super vanilla sex life. I don't know if I'm talking about getting married because it's the expected thing for me to do, because I've grown incredibly attached to her and don't want to lose her, or if I'm just resigning my rebel card for something dependable.
She is a great girl, a fantastic cook, fun to be around, pretty, and extremely friendly. She's also unhealthy in her eating and exercise habits (which is partially due to medical issues), isn't in the same place as me career or interest wise, and is boring in bed. I do love her a great deal, but don't know of this is what I should be doing.
I also could just be nitpicking about what is by all counts the best relationship I've ever had with a good woman who loves me. | I don't know if I'm settling down for the best option available currently, or just being extremely picky and should be happy with a good woman. |
t3_2njc4h | relationships | Me (31m) and my girlfriend (30f) are taking a break. Duration 9 years. | I'm on my cell so forgive the mistakes
My girlfriend and I have been dating for 9 years. We have been with my parents and that has been a distinct source of stress on us. Last night she sat me down and she said she doesn't make me happy anymore and that I need to find someone who will make me happy.
I am completely lost right now and I don't know how to handle it. It's always different when you are the one experiencing this. I don't know what she meant I know she is unhappy with where we live and I want to change that. She also is upset that I have never proposed but it was always my intention to marry her. She's my best friend.
I can provide more details when I get home. | girlfriend of 9 years moved out and wants a break. I have no idea what to do. |
t3_wm7e8 | AskReddit | Would you watch an athletic competition where there were no rules banning performance enhancing drugs or other innovations? Think of it as an Olympics where anything and everything goes. | I got the idea because I noticed that almost all sports today go to great lengths to try and make their success governed only by the natural human body's limits and the training of the athlete. But I was thinking that it would be really interested if we allowed athletes and their teams to use medical and technological advancement we know to create super athletes.
*********
Not only do I think it would be super entretaining to watch super enhanced athletes throw a javeline like a mile, but I also think the amount of research that would be thrown into biological and technological enhancements would be a huge boost in human-augmentation research and development. We could probably get new drugs, prosthetics, etc as incidental pluses from this competition. Imagine how Formula 1 has contributed to car technology, as compared to NASCAR that doesn't really allow tech. There is room for both kinds of competitions I think... | No rules athletic competitions would be awesome to watch, and probably advance human enhancement tech. |
t3_1mw8r7 | relationships | Me 20f him 28m I'm confused about me and him | So me and let's say k have been fwb for almost two years now and when we first started I got an actual bf and he was fine with it but now he's not I broke up with my ex a little over 5 months ago and I told my fwb that I was gonna start looking for a bf. Well let's just say he tried to stop me from looking for one in an off set way and I could tell he didn't overly like the thought of me being with another guy even though me and k are still just fwb.
Let's fast forward to a few days ago me and him were texting back and forth when I suddenly just says that he really really likes me and that It pretty much makes him jealous when I'm with another guy. After he said that I started to connect the dots I guess I noticed a while ago he started calling names that you usually use for a bf or gf.
But now I am extremely confused as to what to do next about all this. | my fwb of almost two years says he has really strong feelings for me its kinda left me confused and not sure what to do |
t3_1lf6sa | relationships | 20m and 18f, should we split up b/c her verbal abuse | A few days ago I was having an argument with my girlfriend over some money problem, and I felt like she was acting as though I behave much worse in the relationship than she does. So I said at two different times in the conversation that 'sometimes I feel I am in an abusive relationship' (e.g. calling me an idiot, swearing, saying I'm a liar and I should never forget that, etc). To be fair I've also sworn a lot and I did lie seriously once, which was a big deal for us.
Since then, she has thought about it and wants to break up because she thinks our relationship is really unhealthy. I want us to stay together. I suggested that she stop doing what I thought was abusive, and while she has considered this idea too, she thinks the best thing to do would be to break up. She feels really horrible about the situation and says that every time she thinks about what I said she thinks the best course of action would be for us to break up.
Do you think breaking up is the right thing to do? | I sometimes think the relationship is abusive, she wants us to break up but I don't |
t3_mi32c | AskReddit | Can anyone give me a good reason why music should continue as an industry today? | I know the music industry wants itself to continue, obviously, so they can still make their money, but I'm wondering about its actual benefits to anyone else. I've believed for a while now that we'd be better off without labels and the sort; they had their purpose before, but now with the availability of recording gear and software along with the Internet for artists to promote themselves, why do we need this conglomeration of suits and ties who take cuts from everything the artists do?
When I played music, I didn't care about making money off of it. On the road, I needed a few bucks here and there for peanut butter sandwiches, but little would make me happier than for someone to want to listen to my music, even if that meant they went home and pirated it. | Why do we need a music industry for good music to exist and be available? Shouldn't an art form be driven by the artists who are doing it for passion and not profit? Discuss! |
t3_214qtq | relationships | Me [17M] with my gf [17 F] 9 months, Just questions :/ | Basically, I've been going out with this girl for almost a year now and I've felt very distant from her even when she's sitting right next to me.
She never makes any romantic gestures. She's a very nice and sweet individual and this of course means that she's nice to everyone, however, she never does anything for me that goes beyond what she would do for another person? idk how to explain it but sometimes i feel like I'm just another person to her. :/
On valentines day she booked her schedule with some kind of tea party with her friends even though i was dating her and all the other people at the party were single. Then when she talked to me later on a few days before valentines day she asked if i wanted to do something and i told her yes and that i would've asked her if she didn't fill her schedule up. Then when it came to valentines day she had to go for art class and we decided not to celebrates valentines day. :/
She never invites me to dates where it's just me and her, it's allways with a group of friends and I always try to setup dates where it's just us two.
I probably have some shitty qualities in me but idk :c sometimes i feel like she dosen't love me. | I'm a jealous dood who feels like his gf dosen't love him. |
t3_3v8o7e | relationships | I [M / 20] have been in my relationship with my girlfriend [F / 20] for way too long and I am worried about the future | I want to start off by saying that I am a massively weak-willed person and it is extremely hard for me to disappoint people or tell someone "no" for my own personal reasons. Basically I have a lot of trouble putting myself first in any situation.
My relationship with my current girlfriend is coming up on a year soon. There's not a lot of history to explain. The basic point is that she is extremely dedicated and committed to this relationship and has so far had no reason to believe that I am not also equally as committed. The problem is I am not in love with her, and I am unhappy in the relationship, and have been for a long time. She talks about how much she loves me frequently, and I respond the same way because I physically can't bring myself to tell her the truth. She has done nothing wrong and doesn't deserve any pain, and I feel like a fucking piece of shit for lying to her face so much, but I can't even muster up enough willpower to tell her when I dont want to hang out, let alone break up with her. And now our anniversary is coming up and I feel sick to my stomach knowing I'm going to have to put on a facade of love throughout the whole thing. I know that the answer to this problem is to just tell her the truth. I'm just so disgusted with myself for lying to her for so long that I would never forgive myself for the amount of pain I'd put her through if I broke up with her now, but I get more and more entrenched in my own lies with every day I let pass. I know there's not a whole lot that can be done or said, but I wanted to see if anyone could possibly offer any advice. | I have been lying to my girlfriend about loving her for a long time because I am a shitty weak willed person and cannot bring myself to tell her the truth, but I am also very unhappy in the relationship and don't want to lie anymore |
t3_1jgpxe | relationships | I'm a [19M] with my [19F] GF at ~6 months. She has no friends, and depends solely on me and my friends for entertainment. | This is a follow up to my earlier post
Gave it some thinking. I am very willing to date this girl well into my next year of school. I like her a lot, and enjoy time spent with her. However, there is one dealbreaker issue I've been dealing with since the beginning.
She has no friends.
I could go on and speculate as to reasons why. It could be that girls just don't like her because of her attitude. We've had tons of talks about "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" but it seems to do nothing but make her upset. It could be that she always appears to want to be the center of attention, and doesn't care to be wherever she is if she can't be. It could be that her spunky/childish actions just seem immature and obnoxious to onlookers (i find them cute).
I don't know why she doesn't have friends. But since she doesn't, I always feel like she makes me directly responsible for her boredom. When we are together and she wants to be hanging out with more people, it's always my friends that it has to be. But if you read my other post you know a ton of my friends don't exactly like her.
I could be worrying about nothing. We start an entirely new semester of college next year. College is THE place to meet people. She could make more friends than me next year. This is just an issue I'd like some advice on. | Girlfriend has no friends, depends on me and mine, causes trubs |
t3_1jhxfb | dating_advice | Interracial Dating - Meeting her Parents | I am a Chinese born Canadian, she is a Ukrainian/Scandinavian Canadian. We met through a mutual friend, and have it hit off real well. We are at the point of our relationship where we'd like to introduce each other to our parents, somewhat looking for their blessing to advance the relationship to the next stage.
For the most part, she has been pressing the relationship forward - and wanted me to meet her parents. I have no issues with that and am actually looking forward to it. However, she had indicated that her parents have a preference for a Caucasian match for her - she has yellow fever and is not into Caucasians at all - but she see is a tad worried about her parent's opinion still. I am indifferent because I've dated all races, and my parents are indifferent as well.
Is there any advice in terms of how I may be able to overcome her parent's racial biases - or, lead the conversations down a path which takes the focus and emphasis on this particular subject?
Would love to get feedback on this one. Thank you. | I am Chinese guy dating a Caucasian girl, meeting her parents that have a bias in favor of Caucasian men - how to win. |
t3_3ateou | relationships | I want a break up. Don't know how to do it | For mine and her privacy I'm not going to reveal ages or anything.
Some background information -
- We're both homosexuals.
- Relationship has been going for around 2 months now
- We were best friends before the relationship
- Our relationship is a secret because she doesn't want to come out
Basically, I want to break up with this girl. My reasons being is that I never actually see her. I work during the weekends and we both had exams a few weeks ago. I only met her twice in the past 3 weeks. Whenever I ask her to hang out she's either busy revising, with her family or hanging out with other friends
I had an argument with her about her hanging out with an ex and she told me she didn't want to be with them anymore and that she was only friends with him (I got upset because I hadn't seen her in days and she told me she was busy when I caught her in town with him)
Yesterday she messaged me asking to meet up with her and I said "sure, whenever I guess, I'm free all week" she took my message the wrong way and told me that if i didn't want to meet then it's fine. I told her I didn't mean it like that and asked her to meet me today, she then said she was busy all day today and tomorrow. By this point I just want to end it because it doesn't feel like a relationship anymore.
Prom is in 10 days and I'm sitting with her at prom with her friends (not mine) which makes this 10 times harder to do
How do I break up with her? and how do I do it when we rarely meet up? | I want a break up. doesn't feel like a relationship anymore, I want a relationship where I'm not feeling like a second choice. How do I do it? |
t3_s5nzf | relationships | Girlfriend got screwed..Turning to the motley crew at reddit for some suggestions and ideas. | Hey Reddit, My name Is Andrew and I need a bit of help...Ive been dating this girl for about 2 years...Officially 2 years on the 27th,and we have run into a problem. our 2 year anniversary falls on the the night of grad bash. Her birthday is on May 1st...The same day our choir has a state competition in Jacksonville. She got the short end of the stick on both occasions... So I want to plan an incredible 2 year ann/18th birthday for Her to make things less dreadful. Any ideas for the perfect Saturday? 8am-12 pm? I really love this girl, And want to do something special for her.Thank you for all the help and suggestions. | Girlfriend screwed on 18th birthday and 2 year anniversery..Tips for perfect day? |
t3_i3y42 | relationships | How to be less psycho jealous? | I know its completely normal to be jealous from time to time, however I am finding myself (F. 20yrs) recently become super jealous..or I should say threatened by a few of my BF's (M. 21yrs) female friends. I absolutely hate it! I don't want these feelings to surface and most of all, I know its crazy and that there is absolutely nothing going on. But as soon as that jealousy bug hits, its like the rationality in me just melts away. I believed I'd feel more fulfilled if I were able to harness and control this jealousy. I need your help reddit! What are some tips to diffuse or treat this feeling? | jealous. help! |
t3_2jui5i | tifu | TIFU by making a website. | I have been bored for the last little while, so I made a website. It took a while to learn about and finally publish. The one thing I didn't learn about, was Whois.com. This website, takes info from your website (including your home address, and Phone number) and makes it public. While it got over 1,500 upvotes on /r/montageparodies, people in the comments had made their way to Whois.com, and were calling me by my full name, and telling me that everyone could see my contact info. So, that was a thing. Today, I spent a bunch of time re-making it, and making sure Whois.com doesn't know a thing. Currently Whois.com thinks the website is owned by "Noneofyobuisness CrazyFool" Who lives at "1800 Street Street." | I made a website, posted it on reddit, it got over 1,500 upvotes, and for 12 hours, all of my personal info was available to everyone. |
t3_20vxuu | relationships | Me [15 M] with my girlfriend [15 F] , keeps ignoring me. | My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 2 months now. Up until about two weeks ago we were great but then for a reason that is still unknown to me she just stopped talking to me. I have asked her why and she has just said that her parents are freaking out. Whenever she isn't talking to me its always some other guy.
When she finally talks to me she treats me like im the best and I just forget about her talking to everyone expect right after she is done hanging out with me she just goes right on talking to other people. | My girlfriend ignores me but when she isn't I instantly become the best but when she leaves I feel like shit again |
t3_z6z31 | relationship_advice | [24/M] Need advice on (24/F) who is giving me mixed signals. | Throwaway account.
[Aug 2011]
It all started when i meet Jane at a friend's birthday party last year. We felt an instant connection and mutual attraction, two weeks after she asked me on a date (yay for girls who take initiative). Fast forward a couple of months and everything was going OK, we hanged out on a weekly basis and talked on the phone of IM almost daily.
[April 2012]
Everything was going just fine until her birthday, she invited a bunch of friend to a local pub and she just ignored me all night, we didn't talk at all that night.
Then a friend of her started to talk to me (i don't remember her name, i never saw her again, sorry). She told me how much Jane talks about me and how much she likes me and it was odd she wasn't paying any attention to me that night. Somehow that made me feel a little better.
After than night Jane declined every single one of my invitations, at first she always made up any excuse (work, study, etc. you name it) and then she just ignored my texts and phone calls. I even invited her to my birthday party and she didn't even bothered telling me she wouldn't come.
I just rationalized that she just doesn't like me anymore, i was really heartbroken at the time and i felt like i couldn't do anything about it.
[Aug 2012]
Fast forward to my friend's birthday party this year (one year after i meet Jane) and we talked again for the first time in almost half a year, she complained to our friends that i don't invite her anymore, that i don't talk to her anymore and that I just ignored her after her birthday party. After my friend's party i asked her out again... just to be rejected at least 4 more times during the past month. | Meet a nice girl and dated for a couple of months, she ignored me for a long time and a year later she complained about me not calling her anymore and "breaking up" without telling her. |
t3_429h3m | relationships | Me [27 M] with my wife [26 F]. I'm considering a separation from a toxic marriage, but I'm not sure, and need help. | Ive been married 3 years, together 7. It's been a rollercoaster, with periods of emotionally abusive patterns. I've said "one more time", "I'll give this a few more months to see if she changes and things get better", so many times.
We've been in couples counseling the last year, but we arent much better off. I know in my heart and mind my trust and sense of security in this relationship has long run dry.
---
Long story short, I talked to my wife about a separation. I want to try moving out this weekend. But, I feel like I'm walking into this blind.
I have no idea how to plan for a separation, or what to do. Counselor hasnt been much help. Every article I find online about separation has the "do this to save your marriage!" slant, but... I'm not sure saving this is what I want. However, I cant find clarity to move in either direction.
A few things I know:
* 1) we agree on 2-3 months
* 2) we do not agree on the primary goal. She wants this to help save the relationship; my main goal is apace and clarity to heal, take care of myself for once, and see if I need to really let go of this or not.
* 3) we do not agree on amount of space. She wants to plan to spend time together two days per week; I think once a week at most. But, idk, what is normal or best?
---
I want to take action but I dont know what to do. I'm scared this might just turn into one more case of sliding back to giving this "one more try". Everytime ive done that I keep getting hurt. I can't spare any more of my life to this.
Im holding on to hope that this relationship can work, but... maybe I shouldnt.
Are the differences in our goals above a surefire sign a separation like that isnt going to help anything? The worst case would be just dragging on the inevitable.
Thanks for any perspective. | I'm considering separating from my wife, who has been abusive in the past, and my ability to be happy and trust in this relationship amd the future has been long broken. I need help figuring out if a separation has any chance of helping, or not. |
t3_51tyn5 | tifu | TIFU by nearly setting my house on fire with a cigarette. | This incredibly stupid fuck-up of mine happened around 3 months ago. I have to start off by saying I'm a smoker but one who doesn't like to smoke in the house at all, due to having children and the smell of lingering tobacco just makes me feel sick. So anyway, I was awaiting a parcel for around a few hours which contained clothes for the night out I was attending at a local bourbon festival, I missed the delivery but was delivered to one of my neighbours and was awaiting a knock from the door from them with my parcel. I'm outside in the back garden having a cigarette after waiting around 3 hours, I start to get impatient as this time it's 6:30pm and I'm supposed to be meeting friends at the bourbon festival at 8:00pm, suddenly the door bell goes off, I look around for somewhere to extinguish my cigarette quickly, I see somewhere, a big orange plastic bucket, I throw it in, answer the door and go upstairs to get changed. Around 30 minutes later I come downstairs after changing, call a cab and watch TV waiting for it to arrive, suddenly I get a big whiff of smoke, It's not uncommon to smell smoke as everyone around mine seems to use wood burning fires, but this smell is far too strong for that. I casually walk in the backroom with the double doors to go outside and that's when I see it. My fuck up. Everything outside my doors is engulfed in flames, the decking, the nothing-left-of-it orange bucket and countless of other junk I had outside my back door. I have to make it clear I had no hose outside at this time, nor did I have a fire extinguisher, neither a bucket.. So I had to resort in trying to put out this big fucking blaze with pots and pans of water, many of them. During this time I miss my taxi and the worse part of it is that my now new clothes smelt like smoke and covered in soot. I had to change and put on old clothes to go out. Safe to say, I'm an absolute fucking idiot for throwing a cigarette in a plastic bucket. | Nearly burnt my house down by throwing my cigarette in a plastic bucket. I am not a genius. |
t3_43graz | relationships | Me [18M] with my EX [18F]. She wants me back...again. I am feeling pretty weak as we were together for such a long time I am hurting quite bad. | So we broke up a second time after she chose to keep talking to an Internet friend when I said he was a dealbreaker for me. Immediately afterwards she blocked him on everything and came back wanting me. I did everything with her and it's hard when she is still what I think of after I wake up and before bed.
Now I know there are plenty of fish in the sea and quite a few girls have shown interest in me but I don't think I'm ready yet. All I want is her. I don't want it to be a situation where she is the one that got away. She is funny and kind and cute and sweet and I don't think I'll ever do better.
To be fair to both points of view she hurt me a bit. We already broke up once before because she said she lost feelings for me then a half week later wanted me back. She has her downsides like she is too competitive and can be oblivious to other guys intentions.
So now she wants me back. She is so broken up at the thought of me with anyone else and i have to say that I am the same for her. But I want to at least give it time. She is saying she will wait years for me and that she feels terrible for how she acted and she will do literally anything for me to not leave her life. Honestly my logical side is saying she hurt you too much just stop even being around her but my emotional side is saying she is the one and we are just right for each other. My friends and even hers are saying getting back would be stupid and bad for me.
Thats the dilemma. I know it's hard to describe emotion through text but I'm trying so hard. Please keep an open mind if you reply. I know this subreddit is very hard on the unrepresented party. I want people to think of both points of view first. | ex wants me back but I'm conflicted. It's so much more complicated than that. |
t3_2qiy9r | relationships | Is it stupid wanting to go into a relationship knowing it expires in like 6 months? | Hey so I've been seeing this girl that i really like for just over a month now and i can safely say we're interested in eachother. The issue is she (20F) goes on a year abroad next school year and then does her final her there after, while i (21M) am in my final year.
Now she said she doesn't want to get into a relationship because of this whole year abroad thing and i don't really blame her. The issue is i quite like being comfortable in a relationship and i feel like i still have to watch very carfully what i say still...we haven't spoken about it yet but I'm not seeing anyone else anymore and i can assume she isn't either, however there was a point where she said she wanted to just keep it so i.e just dating and hooking up (can't remember clearly, i was quite drunk, and i don't think she meant casual hookups as such). The other issue is she said she's never been in a relationship because she never felt the need to be so. We have had sex, and she's told me on many an occasion that she really fancies me.
So all in all this is a rather new situation to her and i can tell and confronted her that if we keep seeing eachother the manor in which we do we're probably going to end up being a couple. For me rather i find it easy to fall into and out of relationships...
A couple things that i have deduced about her. She's very live in the moment, although she said she'd miss me over the xmas break, our text conversations are quite mundane. Which is why i know long distance would not work.
And I'm not sure she knows what she wants out of this whole situation, i keep getting mixed signals of commitment...and from a subjective point of view they're purely accidental... | I (20m) have been seing a girl (21f) for about a month now |
t3_ve861 | relationships | Have you ever stopped loving someone all of a sudden, with no reason/explanation why? Were you able to fall back in love with him/her? | Length of Relationship? 1 year and 7 months. We're both 21.
The reason I'm asking is, well, my boyfriend's very upset and frustrated with himself. He's frustrated because he doesn't know how he could stop loving me all of a sudden, and he doesn't know what his problem is.
He says he still wants to be with me, and that he cares about me. He's just wtf-ing at himself at how this could have happened. He says I didn't do anything wrong, at all. He just says that his love for me disappeared all of a sudden, and he wants to know why. Since he doesn't know why, he's really frustrated with himself.
If this helps, we were on a break for about two days. He asked for a break to see if he could figure things out. This was a no contact break. He ended up messaging me two days later telling me that he missed me and he can't stand not talking to me. I don't know if that helps at all, but whatever.
From what I can see, there's not much I can do to help.. is there? | Boyfriend's frustrated with himself because he "all of a sudden" stopped loving me, and he doesn't know why. He doesn't want to leave and he still cares about me. Can I help him? Is it possible for him to fall back in love with me? |
t3_fw6qj | AskReddit | One of my friends ( A girl) is being harassed at school, and is now being forced to take online classes at home to avoid the harassment. What can i do to get those involved suspended? (Again) | The girls have already been suspended once. I have no physical proof of their harassment. I managed to get them suspended the first time because I hard very hard evidence of the harassment. (Facebook screen-shots of a chat i had with one of the girls detailing what they were doing to her, and why they were doing) Still not all the girls were involved were suspended. ( I have personally looked into the level of suspension these girls should get, and it should be 10 days at the minimum+criminal charges for harassment, and cyber bullying) I will not go into any detail of the type of harassment they were perpetrating the first time, because i want my friend to have anonymity in this situation (i know a few people at my high school browse reddit). What i can say is that as a result of this harassment the girl is scared of coming to school because the harassment is getting so bad, and she and i both know we cant go to the school principal/administrators because they will not do anything. Reddit what im asking you is either ideas to obtain more proof that the girls are verbally harassing the girl, or anyone that knows if the school administrators can actually do anything without hard proof. | my friend is scared to come to school because she is being harassed, and is now being forced to take online classes in the safety of her own home. What can i do to help her? |
t3_vt5r3 | personalfinance | I want to invest like I couch potato but I want more risk than a 60/40 split. What should my asset allocation be? (CA) | I'm going to open up an account to purchase TD e-series funds as advocated by the [Canadian Couch Potato] I'll be doing something like the global couch potato option 2. I am very young and this will be retirement savings so I'm comfortable taking on more risk than the model portfolio suggests. I was thinking about going ~85-100% equities for now and slowly move to more bonds over time.
I would like to learn about the implications of choosing different asset allocations, specifically US vs international vs canadian equities as opposed to fixed income vs equities. I understand the big picture stuff (stocks may give higher returns but are far more volatile, the US and international funds are larger and more diversified than the Canadian fund etc.), but I don't understand how I should modify the model portfolio for more risk. eg would a 100% equities portfolio be 1/3 each to Canadian, International and US equities or should it be something more like 25% Canadian, 40% american and 35% international? Obviously there are a lot of options and I would like to understand why I might want more US, or more Canadian or more International. | How do I modify the [Global Couch Potato] portfolio from 60/40 equities/fixed income to 100% equities? |
t3_2dyvey | tifu | TIFU by falling off a bike | I always come to TIFU and say, wow, I'm glad my life isn't as bad as that person's, but the day before yesterday, I fell off a two person bike. We're in China for vacation, and at Xi'an they built a big wall long ago. There's a bike rental at the top so you can bike on the wall, and we got two two person bikes, and one one person. I was behind my dad on a two person bike. I realized that, because I wasn't steering, I could take my hands off. Just perfectly, we had a camera and we had to take some pictures, right? So I volunteered and a bit later, I don't really know what happened, I fall off the bike. I'm hanging upside down and I'm yelling for my dad to stop. He stops really quickly, but I already have multiple bruises, I don't know it but I'm bleeding onto my underwear, not heavily, and I've broken the camera so you can't auto focus anymore. My mom, brother, and older cousin are up ahead so they don't know any of this yet. Yeah, I fucked up pretty badly. I have bruises everywhere now. | I fell off a bike, broke a camera,gave myself multiple bruises, and started bleeding |
t3_1l6srt | tifu | TIFU by not knowing my password | This actually happened right after I finished building my PC last year. Any ways I had gotten windows all installed and set up. All I needed to do now was log on to install whatever program I wanted on there and I would be totally done. However when I went to log on my usual password didn't work. So I kept trying. Somehow I guess when I set my password I hit the wrong key in the same way both when I set the password and when I confirmed it. Most likley my PW was completley right except one random letter was wrong and I had no clue what it might be. Since i had never even logged on there was no way I could get my PW back without some major hax. So basically that entire night of setting up windows was wasted and I had to do it again the next day. | When setting my password for windows I managed to put the same typo in both fields and had to reinstall becaus I didn't know what the typo was. |
t3_24nd7h | relationships | I [20 F] feel totally unappreciated by my boyfriend [22 M] of four years, and am feeling as though the relationship has run its course. | Hey r/relationships,
First time poster, sorry if I'm doing anything wrong.
My boyfriend and I have been together for just over four years, and spent a lot of time apart while we were both working on college stuff. We've been living together for the past year and I've never felt worse about our relationship. I feel like I don't know the cause behind this downward spiral either.
Basically, we wake up early in the morning, are apart from each other all day while working and going to class (he's a senior and I'm a sophomore at our university), and then we carpool home around 6:00. We usually eat together but after that he's on his computer for the rest of the night. I constantly feel like I'm bothering him when I ask if he wants to hang out or have sex.
His libido has really dropped to the point where we have sex maybe three times a week, when I've tried to convey that I'd want to every day.
I feel like I cater to his needs while he is totally dismissing mine. I make almost all of his meals, I clean the space that we're renting, I take care of our pets, and he doesn't lift a finger unless I literally beg.
I hate talking about him like this because I feel that we never had these problems before. I just wonder if I should get out of this and find someone that maybe appreciates me or is willing to talk to me and have a closer relationship. I'm currently in therapy trying to work on anxiety and depression, and he doesn't seem to get that a little love would be great right about now.
Has anyone been through this before? Any advice to offer? Thanks in advance for any replies. | Boyfriend of four years doesn't really communicate much verbally, and his libido has plummeted. Unsure if it's time to split. |
t3_24oaxs | relationships | Me (25F) with a boyfriend (24M) of 6 months who won't commit | We dated for four months about six months ago and then I moved away and neither of us wanted to try long distance. Now we're in the same area again and are dating again.
The problem I've run into is his crippling fear of commitment. He won't even make plans a few weeks in advance "in case something happens between us". He's a lot nicer than any guy I've ever dated, so I want to give him a chance. However, I need more than a lukewarm relationship and he's not willing to supply that.
Should I just give up on him or keep giving him time to commit? | boyfriend won't commit, should I be patient with him or give up? |
t3_4hwkfn | relationships | Me [18 F] with my boyfriend [19 M] experiencing unwanted apathy in our relationship | I have been dating my boyfriend for over a year and everything has been perfect. I am a senior in high school and he is a freshman in college. We have made long distance work this year and next year I'm going to college with him. We have experienced and learned so much together and I truly think of him as my best friend. He makes me feel so loved and appreciated all the time and I have felt so in love with him over the past year.
Over the past couple days, I confronted a scary, mysterious feeling I was having about our relationship. I think it stemmed from not spending enough time with myself because I'm always anxious about when we will see each other next. I've been meditating on it and I feel a lot better than I did and I remembered all the reasons I love him but for some reason, I can't feel it. When I envision us breaking up, I know it would be awful but I can't feel it. This unwanted feeling of apathy and indifference toward someone I know I am in love with is really scaring me. I don't want to lose him. | I am feeling indifferent/apathetic toward someone I am deeply in love with. I need advice |
t3_38tipv | relationships | Me [24F] with my boyfriend [52M] of 6 months. do i have daddyissues? | I'm dating and sleeping with a man 28 years older than me, no one knows, because honestly I fear their initial reaction. I'm 24 and he's 52. Ive been through a lot which has made me more mature, more mature than the average 24 year old i'd say. My dad died when I was 17, very sudden, and that left scars and a lot of unanswered questions. My mum is there but not supportive emotionally, though she would support me financially if needed ( just to mention my background) I'm a student at uni, finishing my degree in a year. I have my own flat, a job, and i'm generally doing fine. I met this man at my local favorite bookshop, and we exchanged emails as we seemed to have chemistry. Well yeah we did! But now I feel as if society is against us, we refrain from kissing and hugging when we're out and even when we're alone I feel sort of dirty, as if I have daddyissues or i'm just seeing him because I didnt have my dad or something like that. It bothers me because I dont feel like i'm "damaged" or even have daddyissues, but I Think that's what other people are thinking when we're out. That he's just an old pig and i'm armcandy. He's not rich though, leads a normal life and all that.
I just need some advice. Should I look deeper into why i'm with this man, or just accept the fact that he's older and that that has nothing to do with any "issues" of his or mine.
Reddit, help a girl out! | I want to know if it's normal to feel dirty and whorish for sleeping with an older guy. Do i have issues? |
t3_3uhbmf | relationships | Should I (18M) Get back together with my LDR girlfriend (20F)? | So I was with my girlfriend for a year and we broke up a month ago, and I STLL miss her like crazy. I was so in love with her and not a day goes by that I dont think about her. The thing is, the only,reason we broke up is because we are long distance (shes in poland im in the US) And it was hard for me to stand being away with her. But I still am crazy for her.
So what should I do reddit? Should I get back together with her and try and make the long distance work even though it made me sad a lot of the time? Or should I keep toughing it out and stay apart? | Dunno if I should get back together with my ldr girlfriend. |
t3_49mimt | tifu | TIFU by stealing my own umbrella | Requisite qualifier, this did not happen today, it happened last year.
I am currently living and working in South Korea, a country where age is a very important factor in how you interact with people -- it is often one of the first questions you are asked because it will determine how people will speak to you (and in the Korean language it will even change the vocabulary and grammar you use).
Anyway, this particular morning the weather called for rain, and so I decided to take my umbrella with me to work. It was a fairly unique umbrella (argyle print) with a wooden sort of gnarled handle. On my way to work I stopped at the bank to pay some bills at the ATM. I finished my business and started to make my way to the subway when it started to sprinkle a bit. I realized I had left my umbrella at the ATM and turned around and started to walk back. When I got to the bank, I saw an elderly gentleman coming out, holding my umbrella. Without thinking, I smiled at him, reached out and took my umbrella -- only barely registering the shocked looks of the people around me. It was only when I was half way to work that I realized what it was people standing around had seen: A foreigner just walk up to an old man and steal his umbrella. | Forgot my umbrella at a bank machine, old man found it, and I took it from him. |
t3_4ytv78 | relationships | Me (19F) with bf (22M) of over 2 years. Life is a mess now. | So basically we've been together 2 years. I love him so much & really care for him more than anyone else.
Thing is I feel like things between us don't feel the same anymore. I've been through a lot in the past few months with a very close bereavement in my family & im finding it hard to deal with. I find myself lashing out at my boyfriend & being horrible when he's nothing but amazing & supportive towards me.
We talk every single day & see each other nearly every single day. I know not everything is going to be rosy & feel amazing forever. Thing is I don't want to break up with him but I don't know how I feel about anything anymore, my life is just a mess & I miss my dad so so so so much. Should we take a break or work through it?
I want to know how to move forward preferably with him. I want things to be fresh again and fun.
**bold | my life is a mess now, want to be happy again within myself. Want to make things with bf okay again. |
t3_11z5yb | relationships | 18(M) and 20(F) broke up but is there hope or reuniting? | Hi Reddit,
My girlfriend and I dated for 1 month or so. She decided to break up with me since "she doesn't love me anymore". She told me to move on because she has moved on but I don't really want to... I haven't talked to her for a week now and I took all that time to think.
I am the problem because I was emotionally needy. I kept on spending time with her and I basically NEEDED her, I made her really feel bad when she was with her friends and not with me. I was constantly doing the same things over and over... it's like I had no life. We eat lunch at the cafeteria, then I asked her to go to my dorm room and there we might have sex or just simply chill out and talk. Imagine doing this 3 weeks straight... yeah I'm boring. I took this time to work out, meet new friends but I really missed her from time to time.
College life is weird... she may be going through so much stress from mid-terms but I see her going to parties with her "guy" friends. I felt left out a little bit... it would hurt her more if she decides to go to a rebound relationship with her "guy" friends because I told them what happened and they understood me.
How do I make sure that she knows that I have changed myself? So far I'm just having fun being alone and with friends. Going to karaoke nights and get drunk. Most of all I really did have fun but it would be better if she was there.
My body has moved on but my mind doesn't. I kept on holding on hope that she would come back to me. | Girlfriend dumped me, is there a chance of getting together in the future? |
t3_svhni | relationship_advice | I need to do something cool for my girlfriend, but I don't know what... help me please, reddit! | So, long story short, last week I had a huge fight with my then girlfriend, I behaved like an asshole and reacted in a way I shouldn't have, we broke up; afterwards, we have been talking again, I'm trying to change some of my shitty attitudes towards her and people in general, and she told me she is willing to take me back.
The problem here is that she says I never really made an effort to be with her, so in order for us to get back together I've gotta do something cool for her... in her words she told me: "She won't take me back unless I show her I'm willing to do a real effort to be with her, and that I should think outside of my box and go out of my way, as she is not easily impressed". Now, I know in this context this might sound like a stupid demand of hers, but it actually makes sense as I never made any real effort and she wants to see me try and do something cool for her.
I've asked for a lot of female advice and most people say stuff like I should cook for her, or give her a massage or stuff like that, but I don't think that's really demanding or challenging, I wanna do something that's really cool and meaningful, not necessarily flashy or ultra expensive, but to create an amazing experience for her... I come here to ask for ideas about what to do in order for her to have a nice surprise when we finally start dating again. | broke up with girlfriend, she's willing to take me back but I gotta do something cool and special for her in order to show her I'm willing to work on our relationship. Give me ideas. |
t3_v7hbv | AskReddit | I'm fucking pissed right now. How do I get rid of my anger before falling asleep? | I was at work for 7 hours today, but it wasn't that bad. I was about to leave, and my bike was sitting in the storage room the whole time. I pick it up, and I knew something was wrong, the kickstand and the gears had been bent or something, and the rear tire was flat. I didn't know who or what did it, but I wasn't too happy. I then had to carry my bike all the way home (took about 30 minutes). As I was walking past the school, I noticed that I had just stepped in something. Break out the flashlight on my phone, and what a surprise! Dogshit. I finally make it home, and I get ready to go at my brother's punching bag. As soon as I start, I realize that it's just way too loud. I'm pissed about this whole thing, so what can I do about it? | Broken bike and dog shit make for a really unhappy guy. What do I do? |
t3_fvyd0 | AskReddit | Weird charges on gift card, can't find anyone to help resolve this... advice, please? | So I've been using Vanilla Visa and other such gift cards for a while online, because I've been paranoid about fraudulent charges on credit cards. Had those fears affirmed lately, though maybe if it were a credit card I'd have more recourse.
Bought some stuff, and was checking my balance to see how many mp3s I could get with the remainder when I notice two weird charges, pending for 75 cents and one dollar respectively, but I'm worried that they might ask for more, and then what?
I call Vanilla Visa cards to see what is going on, and I'm told I have to contact the companies making the claims. Here are the charges in question:
The first, the 75 cent charge, is from a construction company in Druid Hills, Texas who I can't find on Google, and they gave no phone number. According to Wikipedia, there are places called Druid Hills in Georgia and Kentucky, but not Texas.
The next, the $1 charge, is from AT&T. I call them up, and am asked which number I'm calling about before I can go any further. I am not an AT&T customer. I go to their website and see if I can e-mail them about this, but yeah customer support is for customers only.
I shouldn't worry too much, all they should be able to take is the remaining balance of less than $5 anyway. But if these fraudulent charges are connected to my identity and they come knocking, what then? | Some weird charges popped up on a gift card I was using, and am hoping for answers. I might cross-post this to r/wtf. |
t3_ack7c | AskReddit | Dear Reddit, what are some awesome alternative winter holiday greetings? | I am in the process of wrapping various packages, which vary from an 8ft tall ficus tree to a sack of coal (those two aren't for redditgifts), and writing a multitude of holiday letters. In the process of all of this, I came to realise that my repertoire of alternative winter holiday greetings was dangerously lacking in variety—happy holidays and merry xmas were my two main ones. Those two greetings are not awesomesauce at all. They're quite bland actually. Thus, I have come to you, Reddit, for some awesomesauce winter holiday greetings. Original, offbeat, funny, and/or explicit greetings are welcomed. SHOW NO MERCY.
So far, on my own, I have come up with Happy Yule-idays! | I need a replacement for merry xmas and happy holidays. |
t3_26xwnx | relationships | Me [23F] don't know what to do about my [29M] ultimatum | I'm not sure what to do with my life right now. Here's the situation:
I live with my boyfriend, we've been together for 1.5 years.
I have always been madly in love with him. It began dwindling when he started playing video games. He's a lifestyle gamer and I think I was lying to myself when we first started dating, thinking it would just phase out. Eventually, I became emotionally distant. I have my own good friends now.
Anyway, I went to a conference in New York and met someone. I ended up hooking up with him and have still been texting him once in a while back home. I thought it was going to be a one night stand that would never be talked about again, but now that we're still talking... it feels a lot more real.
My boyfriend found out about it after looking through my phone. He has basically held a gun to my head, saying if I don't message him and tell him I have a boyfriend then he's going to leave me.
I'm not sure if I should do it and stay with my boyfriend, or not and break up with my boyfriend. | Felt emotionally distant to my boyfriend because of his gamer lifestyle, hooked up with someone else at a conference, boyfriend snooped and found out, is now making me decide! What should I do? |
t3_ijrz3 | AskReddit | What are your wildest drinking/partying experiences from college? | Last year during Spring Weekend at my school, the administration sponsored a big foam party, where two large machines would generate foam and spew it into bounce houses for all the kiddies to jump in.
The line for this event was enormous, and it was supposed to be split into two (those who had purchased tickets beforehand and those who had not). Anyway, the gig was supposed to open at 10 pm, but the machines weren't working and they had to delay entry. All the people in the line were screaming "LET US IN" and I can say that at least half of them were either drunk or high. Eventually, the huge mob nearly broke out into a stampede, pushing through the barricade and racing towards the foam machines. Because the green is on an incline, hundreds of kids raced down the steps, many of them falling down and tumbling on the way. They had to bring in the cops. | Crazy crowd in line for foam party goes out of control, bypass security and race towards foam in a drunken stampede. |
t3_21wfr4 | relationships | Me [23M] with my girlfriend[26F] two months, apriljoke, she didn't find it funny | I am on a language stay in the US(sorry for possibly wrong sentences). A Month before I went, I got known her. Now I'm almost five weeks abroad.
On the first of April I texted her that I will break up. For me totally obvious as a joke. Because we used to skype and text a lot, while I always mentioned that I miss her, I thought that she'll get the joke immediately. I mean I really feel love and I use to show it. Actually I didn't thought about the consequences that much. But now I'm bothering above myself, how stupid was that. There would be several other topics for an apriljoke.
After that she wanted to skype. We made up and talked about it. But I have still a guilty conscience. | I did a crack with feelings at first April, but without bad faith. Is there any possiblity for a compensation? |
t3_u8dkw | relationships | The way my girlfriend can drink makes me anxious/nervous | Me 25(m) her 26(f), have been together for about 10 months and we've both been in long term relationships before.
I'm not quite sure how to verbalize my issue but when my gf goes out drinking (either with our without me) the way she proceeds sometimes makes me feel anxious/nervous. There are times when she can have just a few and be fine but there are the times when she drinks more heavily either by partaking in drinking games with all my guy friends or by lining up multiple shots and she won't stop until the night is over (usually when she passes out).
I've brought it up to her in the past but I haven't been the most tactful person and it usually comes across as me criticizing who she is (she worked really hard in school, has a great job and she's finally able to have fun is her response or she's not doing anything that other people aren't doing). I've tried to handle it several different ways but it inevitably winds up with me feeling shitty.
I've become self aware that I have an issue with all intimate relationships where I feel that it's only a matter of time before the other person moves on (lack of self-confidence perhaps) so I'm sure that plays into this somehow. I would just be interested in hearing from anybody else who has experience with a similar situation or who could perhaps provide some insight I haven't thought about before. Once or twice I have thought ending things was the right decision but that quickly changed. Not sure how to handle this in the short/long term so I appreciate any help. | GF's drinking habits causing consternation. |
t3_2wos6j | relationships | How do I(M/16) tell my girlfriend (F/15) that she makes me feel extremely jealous? | So I guess you could call this my first "real" relationship. I've been dating this girl for about 3 months now and things have gone overall very smoothly. I like her a lot. However I can't help but get incredibly anxious when we hang out with other people. Many of my guy friends are friends with her also, so we tend to get together on the weekends. Rarely when we hang out with our friends does she give me the slightest bit of attention. I usually end up sitting alone on one side of the couch while she gets especially friendly with everyone else. Not surprisingly, this makes me feel awkward and irrelevant. And believe me, I know that sounds selfish, but I would really expect a little bit of attention from her. I don't want to just flat out tell her to start paying attention to me more or to stop spending so much time with everyone else. But at the same time, I'm beginning to dread her hanging out with me and my friends because I know I'll just feel small the whole time. How do I tell her about this without offending her? | Girlfriend makes me feel jealous around other people, need help in how to tell her this. |
t3_3wley9 | relationships | Me [23 M] with my BF [26 M] of 5-years, need to end things, as nicely as possible. | I started dating my boyfriend in college. Around the time he graduated, we decided to move to the same city and live together following my own graduation. We moved in together early this summer. Since February I've been having doubts about our relationship, and recently come to the decision that I want to breakup.
Things haven't been exactly perfect for the past few months, but we had been trying to work things out. Lately, my boyfriend has been really gung-ho about paying more attention to me, and it's difficult because I don't want him to start sacrificing his own time when I know things will be ending soon. We were great together in college, but now, less so. Our goals for this stage in our life are about to diverge drastically. He wants to have kids one day, and I do not. He is new to his job and needs to work very long hours, and I don't want him to have to sacrifice his performance at work to keep me happy.
Right now, we split a 1-BR apartment together. I'm not legally bound to the lease in anyway, and even if I stopped splitting with him, he would be perfectly well-off. I'd be willing to continue to live in the apartment, but I don't think he'd be interested in that. I could find and afford a new place, but it would likely require me to take some time off from work. I don't know if he'd ask me to move out immediately or not. This is each of ours' first serious relationship.
Right now, I don't even know how to bring it up. I just know that I can't go too much longer without telling him, since that's not fair to him. Any advice on where to start? | Unsure how to go about breaking up with my boyfriend of 5 years. |
t3_54yarp | relationships | I [22/F] am leaving my SO [23/M] to go back home. | I'm not wanting advice about the relationship, because it was one of the best I've had.
We've been dating for over a year. 2 months ago, I moved 3,000km away to be with him and I just can't handle being so far from my family. The way of life here is very different for someone like me (small town, farm girl, language barrier), so I have decided to move back home. It's killing me but I'm literally miserable here. He does not want to do long-distance.
He understands and is helping me pack and I'm leaving on good terms, but I'm so heartbroken it hurts and I have to drive all the way back by myself.
Is there anything I can do to make the trip easier on me? I won't be driving at night, I'll just be sleeping in my car. There's a lot of beautiful scenery but I'm also a bit scared being alone in areas with no reception.
I'm sorry if there isn't enough information or if this is all over the place. I'm really torn up. I've never had a relationship end like this. | SO and I broke up because long-distance is a deal breaker for him, driving 3,000km back to my hometown. Need advice on how to handle the drive and being alone and getting past this kind of breakup. |
t3_l2i3p | loseit | Went jogging for the first time in forever... | And it was awesome.
So I ended up reweighing myself, after guessing my weight for years, and I'm at 300.6 pounds, so like I said in a previous post, fuck that shit, I'm going to lose it.
Now, my endurance was shit ever since I was about 8, and it only got worse, and I would jog almost never. Last night, I decided to start. I did my first jog tonight, and while it felt like I didn't accomplish anything at first, after a bit, I felt like a champ, even though I was sweating buckets, and wheezing so much.
*But I did it.*
And it was awesome. I just got back about ten minutes ago, and I got myself a large cup of water and a banana after doing some crunches. :) | Exercise. **Feels good man.** |
t3_3f4tm0 | tifu | TIFU by rejecting a hot girl | Well, hello, reddit. It's my first post there (and hopefully isn't the last one) and I'm Russian so my language may seem quite fucked up. The FU happened a week ago or so, but still it's still warm to touch and seems alive.
Nevertheless, a bit of background: I'm an average a bit overwheight asian (the nick shows it perfectly) guy (Mongolian by half, if someone cares) but I were way fatter back in the school. I'm kind of into science, read a lot and I'm generally is a "nice guy". And I had that 8/10 classmate who was all the way into languages, regular sports player (volleyball as I recall). We've never came along, basically we were just nice to each other but after graduation we started chatting a lot.
Fast forward to the past week: we've been riding bikes a lot recently, all these shit talks and stuff and it escalated really quickly. She looked at me really often and as I'm not unconfident piece o'shit, I didn't get anxious and didn't do silly or stupid stuff. Generally, I've been playing it cool and it worked out. She asks me if I'm single and I say that I am which is true, we continue to flirt and then the FU takes place: I say the dumbest sentence in my life - " well, %girlname", I am really happy that we've become friends so fast". I realized what have I just done too late and couldn't play that cool as she already left.
The next day I tried to flirt again and used some cheesy pickup lines but the result is obvious as you guys are reading this. | Was flirting with a girl, acted like a total slowpoke, FUBAR. |
t3_1id64e | Advice | Move to a large, exciting city across the country OR stay and make lots of money? | So here's the situation: I'm currently living in a small city in the South where I have some good friends and a job. However, I want to move to a larger (and more liberal) city with my boyfriend...that city being Seattle. Not only would it be a more exciting place to live in, but it would also be a great place to grow career-wise (if I can find a job) in the 3D industry. I enjoy my current job, but I feel as though I'm in a rut and I'm not growing/learning like I might be able to elsewhere.
After talking to my boss about my desire to move by the end of this year, he told me that I'm incredibly important to the team and offered me a sizable pay increase if I stay. So now I'm stuck and really could use some advice.
Option A:
Stay where I am and accept the pay increase. Comfortable surroundings, familiar friends, an easy-but-not-very-rewarding job (that makes me feel like I'm going "soft"), lots of money, pay off student loans. If I stay, I'll feel as though I'm obligated to stay for at least another year.
Option B:
Adventure! A large, new city with all the wonders that entails. I just turned 28, best to do it while I'm young, right? However...there's a possibility I'll move there without having been able to find a job waiting for me. And maybe even have trouble finding a job once I actually do move there. Still, there are a lot of awesome big companies there it would be a dream to work for (and where I can grow/learn!). I have a bit of money in the bank, but I also have student loans I need to pay off.
My boyfriend has essentially said the decision is all mine to make (he will be able to work no matter if we stay or move, though if we stay he might be tied down for a year here). I really appreciate any advice anyone can give! | Stay put and make lots of money but be unhappy with job OR move somewhere new and awesome but potentially be unemployed. |
t3_3bt6wj | relationships | I [22 M] am contemplating leaving my gf [22 F] of 2 years because of selfish thoughts. | I've [22 M] been in a what most people would consider a "perfect" relationship. My gf [22 F] is a beautiful person both in and out. She's into the same things that I am into, and if not, is always willing to try something new. Our relationships with each others' families are very healthy and our friends are all cool (those here in the bay that is).
However, as of late, the idea that someone hotter and just as (if not more) compatible is out there really entices me. I've been thinking about this for the past two months and am now at a standstill. Tugged between my amazing relationship and the hypothetical "hotter relationship".
I feel extremely shallow for even considering something like this, but it's been bothering me relentlessly. When I consider doing it, I then get stopped by visions of an amazing future with my current gf. When I get caught in that, I get pulled by the potential.
Has anyone been in this situation and/or have any advice or experiences they can share. Anything is appreciated, even hate. | Can't decide between leaving good relationship for potentially better(hotter) relationship or sticking it through. |
t3_1bim5b | AskReddit | Anyone backpacked the states? | I am a Canadian citizen and I wish to backpack in the United States! I wanna start in New York since it is the closest major city to where I am and work my way around and back up the Vancouver. I've been wanting to do this for a while. just so bored of sitting around.
I have a couple of questions! Hopefully someone with some experience will have some insight.
* What is the best method for finding rooms to sleep while travelling? (Hotels, Hostels, park benches)
* As for travel should I hitch some of the way or should I try and find package via railway. I don't really want to fly. I want to see the country not fly over it.
* As this might be a long trip 2-3 months (hopefully) my resources will run out. I will need to find work in different cities, anyone have any experience in this, any suggested companies?
*Any suggested mobile networks with prepaid nationwide coverage?
Also any MUST SEE locations would be greatly appreciated! | I want to backpack the United States on the cheap. |
t3_1aanrf | dating_advice | I [M32] consider to ask my female coworker [F30] out on a date | So I've been working at the same office as this girl for about 3 months now. It's a middle sized office and we are about 80% male employees. I have gotten to know most of the people that work there, both the females and the males, but there is this one girl that is extra friendly to me.
We chatter about almost everything during coffee breaks and lunch and seem to have the same weird humour. We also commute from the same location together and she usually sit next to me on the train too. Besides this she comes and sit next to me during lunch every day. If it should happen that we don't sit together she looks at me and smiles from the place she is sitting even when she's talking to other people. At company parties she also allways hang around with me.
I like her alot, she's very attractive and have a very good personality. Therefore I'm thinking about asking her out outside of work, to discover if it could develope to something else. I know our bosses would not care, heck - some of our bosses are even married together. What I'm more worried about is if we start dating and things go wrong, and then have to see each other at work and even on the train every day.
Have any of you been in the same situation with a coworker? Did you ask her/him out? | My female coworker is extra friendly to me and I consider ask her out for a date |
t3_4rbojq | relationships | Me [26 F] with my lover [40 M], 6 months, I am the other woman: Do I tell his wife? | I am the other woman. I have been for 6 months now. A few days ago he had a child with his wife. This came as a surprise to me, he told me the day she was born. I'm shocked and I'm pissed. I was under the impression that he was getting a divorce. He never wanted kids.
The backstory is lengthy. He is a lecturer at the university I attend. I am a graduate student. After a year of enjoying each other's company professionally, we fell into a deep and passionate relationship. Although the situation sounds cliché, I want to say it's different. He has had issues with his wife, this is known by many. We click, if the situation were more amenable, we would be together. This being said, he has been hiding the pregnancy of his wife from me for the time we have been together - he didn't want to give up the opportunity to be with me.
Since I am angry, of course I want to reciprocate the pain. I want to tell her about our relationship. I want her to know about me and I want him to suffer the consequences. I'm aware that this isn't a fantastic reason, but is this really a bad idea? If I do tell her, what should I say/how should I do it? | I need advice on whether or not I should tell his wife about our affair. If so, how should I do it? |
t3_1b63kf | pettyrevenge | Milky vengeance | So at university, I live with a group of people very close to the main campus so people often come over for tea or coffee between lectures, as it's much cheaper and still close by. In the fridge, we all had separate milk with our names on and though my housemates respected this, the people popping over for a brew didn't. After my milk had been used by the wrong person for, what seemed, the hundredth time I was quite annoyed. To exact my revenge, I crept downstairs an put a few drops of food colouring in everyone else's milk so that it was obvious who's it was. | People kept stealing my milk I put food colouring in theirs. |
t3_2vv8yz | relationships | Husband constantly ignores important holidays. | Me (27F) He (25M) married 4 years
So guys, it's valentines, I should be inundated with cheesy, cliche romance. (Haha, I'm being facetious) Yet I'm crying myself to sleep again.
My husband is the worst with holidays. Not just hallmark days but our anniversary, my birthday etc.
At first I thought he was clueless, so I would tell him explicitly what I wanted and remind him of the date. I never want anything big or expensive, just "let's go out as a family, maybe grab some lunch."
He always sounds keen, we talk plans then on the day he will magically be inundate with work that absolutely must get done this Instant, or act shocked that I was serious about doing something. My last birthday I had to buy my own gift cake and dinner.
Every time I obviously get upset, then he gets huffy that i am upset and begrudgingly tries to fix it. Not because he thinks he fucked up, but because I'm all mad at him. Eg my birthday, 2 months later I get a gift.
I know holidays like V day are silly but I think it's important to take that time to stop and appreciate each other. I got him a bunch of his favourite treats, cooked him dinner and didn't even get any acknowledgement.
I just am so tired of getting my hopes up only to spend the entire holiday feeling worthless while everywhere I look is a reminder of how little my husband gives a shit.
What is the best way to talk to him about this? It isn't the holidays themselves, it's more his behaviour of getting my hopes up, dashing them that morning then getting mad that I'm upset. | husband raises and dashes my hopes every holiday/ birthday. Feel unimportant to him and need to have a "come to Jesus". Help? |
t3_2m5cnb | relationships | I am a 18 M and my mom has trained me to be afraid of dating. | What I mean is, throughout my high school years I had various "relationships" but they were always hidden because if my mom. She is the stereotypical "helicopter mom" and has always been way to scared for me to get my feet wet so to say. If she knew I was seeing someone she would go out of her way to "show up" or embarrass me in a attempt to kill the relationship. She has done this to me dozens of times and has made me afraid to tell her anything. Just her whole persona about small relationships, even those that were completely non-sexual, is that they should be avoided. To add insult to injury she makes sly remarks and teases about whether or not I may be "into someone" and continues to gaslight me about the matter. Its not right and I feel broken when it comes to the topic and am afraid to talk about dating. I feel guilty having feelings for people and I am incredibly lonely and awkward when it comes to talking to people. She always told me she wished for a gay son and that she doesn't want me to "get hurt". I don't see the situation getting better because I'm still at home for college since the university is just around the corner but I am financially stuck here until I graduate. I have definite self esteem issues when it comes to this even though I am in decent shape, naturally strong as an ox, and a good student. I'm not sure what to do to be honest and I feel mentally trapped by these guidelines that were shoved down my throat since I was 14. College is supposed to be awesome but when I'm out of the house I feel like I'm doing something "wrong" and clam up. What should I do? | The way my mom egged me on and purposely destroyed my high school relationships are now carved into my mind and I have a pathological fear of dating. |
t3_1w9c3r | relationships | How could she [19 F] get over me [21 M] so quickly? How can I be happy without her? | I just got out of a 16 month relationship at the beginning of December. I had never shared so much of my life with anybody until she came along, and we were essentially inseparable since we met. We literally shared the same bed every night and shared every day together (other than the summer, we live in different states outside of college). She told me so many times that I was her best friend, her favorite person, and that she had never loved anyone the way she loved me.
Well fast forward to this past fall semester of college and she began acting more selfish, was snappier, and seemed to take me for granted. It caused me so much stress, anxiety, depression, and numerous nights of lost sleep. I still made every sacrifice possible, but she still acted bitter and unfair to me. I couldn't help but remember the sweet, gorgeous girl I fell in love with, so I did anything to try and make her happy again.
Throughout the last, oh, 6 months of our relationship I had this sense that she was hooking up with her ex. She said that he was just her "best friend" and that I had nothing to worry about. Well today I see on Facebook that she's in a fucking relationship with this ugly motherfucker.
I put so much energy into this relationship and I honestly thought I found the love of my life. I'm so used to thinking about her, talking to her, texting her, sharing everything with her. I know she's a terrible person, a liar, and a conniving twat, but I can't let go of the amazing feeling I had once had from being with her. How do I get this awful bitch out of my head? | She left me and is now back with her ex (who I had suspected that she had been cheating on me with). How can I get this psychotic bitch out of my head? |
t3_i4icj | AskReddit | Reddit, what is the best bang for my buck, engagement ring-wise? How can I get the best deal on a natural diamond? | Reddit,
I have been doing some research on engagement rings, and I want your help. Suppose that I am really, really looking to keep my spending on a diamond to $15k or less.
Here is what I would like in a diamond: timeless, brilliant, large, and will make her friends jealous.
I have been doing a ton of research on this. I am open to round, princess, cushion, radiant, and asscher cuts, more-or-less in that order. The setting will be extremely simple (plain band, Tiffany's x-prong setting), unless someone can convince me that pave is a decent option.
Where can I find the best deal on a stone? Which cut will let me get the most stone for my buck? What are the key things to watch for (flourescence, cut proportions, culet, etc.) that wouldn't be obvious?
How can I get a really eye-popping 1.75+ carat stone for under 15k, basically, Reddit? | HELP ME FIND AN ENGAGEMENT RING |
t3_2pq6ge | loseit | [SV] How my journey started & first goal achieved | My journey started on a Saturday night in a Kebab shop.
A very drunk man was talking to some of the patrons. I was so anxious that he would talk to me, I could feel the panic setting in. I made my way to the furthest corner of the shop silently praying he would not talk to me. Thankfully he didn't and on the car ride home I say to my SO:
me: "wow, my social anxiety is just getting worse and worse. I would have had a panic attack if he had spoken to me"
so: (staring straight ahead) "maybe your anxiety is getting worse because you're not, uh, comfortable in your body anymore..."
me: "What? (*disbelief*) No way! It's because that drunk guy was going to talk to me. I don't want strangers talking to me...!"
We are silent on the car road home and I have suddenly realised that he is right. My social anxiety has proportionately worsened as my weight has gone up and up. I vow to myself that I am going to make a change and so I start just tracking my calories, a month later I start c25k...
And today I have lost 22lbs with a further 44lbs to go! I am so stoked and so pleased I have started to make a change for the better. My social anxiety has decreased tenfold and I know that I wouldn't have been so panicked in the kebab shop today (not that I'm going to any kebab shops anytime soon!) So thank you /r/loseit and the community who posts here! | Journey started when SO said my anxiety and unhappiness in my body/weight was related. Achieved first goal of 22lbs with 44lbs to go! |
t3_c51sn | AskReddit | Oh, Great. I think my cat's retarded. | About 6 years ago, I got my first apartment on my own. Within weeks I was I stunned by the utter lonliness that crept over me, and I adopted a cat. Little did I know what I was in for. Sable vanished within an of her arrival, leading me on a 6-hour search and rescue on my part, most of it spent by me convincing myself that she'd somehow escaped onto the balcony and had jumped and slipped, or maybe even leapt off from the 10th floor. I was relieved to discover that she had been napping in the 6" gap behind the crown moulding on my kitchen cupboards.
I soon discovered why Sable had been left at the SPCA... she had an incessant habit of puking. I took her to the vet, who told me she had some strange condition where her stomach was too tiny or the esophagus was too large, none of which explains why she painfully swallows every kibble bite without chewing. She does this so frequently that when I treat her with soft canned food, she will hyperventilate and eventually barf regardless. I have tried to feed her soft food alone, and she continually gorges herself silly until she heaves. She's even learned to use it to display dissent, when I stay at my girlfriends place overnight or some shit she doesn't approve of, and I come home to find a cold and slimy loaf of kittybarf on my keyboard, or shoes, homework. The only silver lining to this story is that she's fastidious about cleaning up after herself... she will eat it again and repeat the process, refreshing what gets digested between rounds with new food.
I'm convinced she's not in pain, because she's purring intently the entire time. What makes me sad is that I can't really show her too much affection, because her purring is strong enough to trigger the gag reflex. She's learned to become a distant cat, staying in the same room but always out of arms reach. Regardless, her quality of life is as good as it gets (I hope...).
But WTF is going on here? Has anybody seen / heard of this before? | My cat pukes a lot. I don't know why. Help. |
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