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everything every good thing that ha happend to me so far is a lie they re all the thing that are used against me to burn me alive i m so sorry that i dedicate my all towards something only to see it fail and burn right in front of my eye i deserve nothing but pain i m a waste of space god doesnt exist he would never be okay with all that ha been happening to me why cant i just fucking go peacefully i m tired of cry | 1 |
my boyfriend is suicidal he s almost attempted separate time thankfully i ve stopped him i know he sometimes cut himself very small cut but he just sent me a photo of photo of a drawing he made of u using his own blood he wrote cute thing all over it but he literally used his own blood so i feel like he s thinking about attempting since he put angel wing on his back what do i do i don t want him hurting himself anymore i make sure to spend a much time with him a possible and even though we re both we both truly love each other i just have no idea how to handle this like should i go over to his house to see how he s doing his parent could care le about him im the only one who s ever there for him what should i do i need help | 1 |
i slept for hour straight yesterday it felt really good i wish i could do that everyday | 1 |
people freak out when i tell them i m going to commit suicide | 1 |
context grew up in a pretty abusive family and always wanted to jill myself even a a young child it get worse till couldn t cope and went to child service at age a i felt i wa going crazy i wa removed from my family and never saw my mum sister again my suicidal thought seem to not always be here now but come in wave i m feeling pretty suicidal now a my gf left me but it made me reminiscent of my last suicidal episode about a year ago this wa the most intense one yet i had plan and everything the last thing i had to do wa to speak to my mum and sister before i passed away i spoke to my sister first and she basically wa horrible to me to the point i couldn t speak to my mum out of guilt turn out the abuse got a lot worse after i got removed and my sister blamed me for it it hit me pretty hard i didn t end up speaking to my mum here s where thing get interesting a i never spoke to my mum i never killed my self she ended up dying a few month afterwards now i feel weird if i had rang her and killed myself would she have been alive it sound silly but my mum illness wa caused by sadness i m sure if i spoke to her she would have survived but then i would be dead so would my suicide have saved a life somewhat this now make me more suicidal a i didn t speak to her before she died but this time i don t have the courage to kill myself sticky situation | 1 |
hi everyone i m going to tell about my thought i m not fluent in english so maybe it will have a lot of mistake but that s a reason for it first i m joining this community cause i can say what i m thinking without no one knowing cause my parentsand my gf dont talk in english second i ve been searching about how to suicide and my first reaction wa panic i wa depressed today a still look the same thing but i m not anxious or feeling panic actually i m really calm about it i don t know if it s courage or cause i m weak or i maybe i just accepted my destiny i hope you all get by through this cause i m not able to handle it anymore nice to met you all and goodbye sincerely matcordeiro | 1 |
gon na sound stupid a this happens to everyone but my daughter brought from daycare a nasty stomach bug i ve been puking my gut out and sitting on the toilet most of the day i m so tired but i can t sleep cause of the symptom i rapidly become so distressed my brain start to spin out of control and i want to end it all i m not capable to do it to be honest but man it is distressing i know after some sleep i ll be good but the current moment are atrocious i just can t focus on something else or clear my mind i should say i combine that to ongoing struggle with operational anxiety from the military every little thing push me to the edge | 1 |
to make thing clear no one invalidates me because i avoid every person and talk to no one i invalidate myself for whatever reason it s been made printed in my head to invalidate myself all the time like some sort of fucked competition on who ha it worse i dont know why i do it i know that every person s experience is different no one can experience the same thing a you it your struggle or whatever i know this yet anytime i hear any negative thing someone is dealing with or read something i downplay my struggle and just assume the person is going through worse i just say that i ain t going through shit compared to this person or that person it dumb i dont know why i do it i shouldnt be comparing my struggle to other people yet for whatever reason i do thank you for reading sorry if i made anyone mad or anything | 1 |
ya i m gon na to do it tonight it s better for everyone this way | 1 |
i ve just had enough of everything i don t know what to do anymore or who to talk to i tried to end my life twice through overdose and that didn t work i have episode where i just don t want to be here anymore i get agitated and it doesn t matter what anyone say or doe it doesn t make it any better i fear that i will have an episode of contemplating suicide and i ll just jump off a bridge it s like my mind take over and i don t think of anyone else my last resort is sectioning and i know what it s like i live in uk but i feel like that would be the safest environment for me where i can focus on getting better without having that constant worry of ending my life can anyone provide any advice at all i would appreciate it i just feel like my life is so pointless growing up with a disability being bullied always feeling different to everyone else childhood trauma and now having a constant battle everyday with my mental health i try to get on with life but i always feel like it would be better if i wasn t here | 1 |
i ve had thought of not wanting to exist for a while but i ve been very much in denial to myself and when spoken to by others about my desire to stop existing i know i also make joke on occasion and yet when i vent it s like i m annoying the people around me or pushing them away because they don t want to hear about my problem they want me to be a happy strong pillar for them who always listens when they need not the other way around i spoilered this a nsfw because it s for one triggering and for two i d like for le people to see it on my profile i just vented about one of the aspect of these thought on a shared space in the channel for triggering topic but i think i want a new outlet just this once i don t like relying on reddit for anything nor putting sensitive information out there so there s a good chance i ll be deleting this post later i feel like this might be triggering but i just keep thinking of a sensory deprivation void that s just dark grey with no stimulus and how without the need for sustenance after a while i d start to fade and all brain activity would just shut off and that s the sort of isolation that i keep wanting no offending sound or smell no need to eat and no bodily function no pain of going without and no pain from my brain suffering the ill effect of my current lifestyle it s an interesting artistic vision but i see how it s too much to share and possibly triggering to some artistic vision it s interesting when viewed through that lens i should say i m le concerned with making sense anymore because i used to put so much effort into syntax and how i came across but i m sick of trying so hard for people i m good with the rambling writing style i ve been using lately i m tired of putting in effort to say thing that i m ashamed of only to have it weird out other people i m good i m alright i m just suffering these bad issue that don t go away and sometimes i have a hard time keeping up appearance i m ashamed of this i m much more neurotic than shared here but i m okay with it i m okay with it i m accepting it i m going to allow myself to feel it and not hate myself for having emotion like usual i m okay with it | 1 |
a lot of the time when it get dark i just start feeling so fucking shitty and i don t know why is this normal thing that will pop into my mind are thing like how i could just kill myself and people would get over it soon in different time of my life i ve planned out what date work best a to not ruin holiday or birthday im not sure if this kind of stuff is normal | 1 |
someone understanding please if you re not i m sorry it ll only make it worse i don t want to vent about my problem because it ll make me break down i hope you understand | 1 |
i just want this pain to stop and i don t know if it s my fault that i am the way i am so maybe i deserve this feeling maybe this is my punishment for being a bad person i have a fear of my parent touching me and most people would think that s ridiculous it s ocd and it s killing me i don t live with them anymore but every time they ask to see me i wish i could stop existing i feel like a bad person for wanting to avoid them even if they gave me trauma so maybe this is what i deserve maybe it s all because of me i wish i wasn t like this i wish i didn t have to be alive i m ready to go | 1 |
no matter what i do and how much i try i feel like noone will ever really care but thats fine i dont want to be alive anymore anyways i keep saying im doing better but im not im sorry i just dont want anyone to worry i just want to be normal i never asked for any of this i never fucking asked to be born into a shithole family i never asked for a potential personality disorder i never fucking asked to be alive this long ive tried so many time ive done so much stupid shit im just ruining my life and ruining everyones perception of me maybe if i make people hate me itll be easier for them to deal with my death i dont want to live anymore i cant eat anymore i can barely get up anymore i have incredibly shit hygiene it disgusting i know im sorry im sorry im like this im sorry im so fucking sorry im still alive it would be easier if i wasnt it would be itd be better it be better that way maybe id be happy maybe itd bring people peace to know im not ruining myself anymore | 1 |
my bf s ex is now his best friend there like sibling according to them and they love each other like family i m a person that can t handle change well at all they use to hate each other and that wa what i wa use to they became best friend and i try so hard to deal with it and be her friend and accept it but it s so hard for me i ve been trying for month eventually tonight she got in a predicament and i helped her bf get her and calm her down i feel like maybe i m accepting her more and friendship more but this relief feeling want me to k ll myself even more what is this i m so confused i thought having good relationship would make you want to stay more | 1 |
it s just pointless what good is money when your country denies you access for help anyways and nobody care people look at me like i m some sort of a freak i m lucky only half of my family hate me but they don t understand i try to reach out for help via phone and when i explained my situation i get called a f g by the person on the line all because i said i m trans woman looking for therapist i am so tired of never being able to leave my room thar year looking for a doctor hasn t worked that people call me a monster threat to our culture that i m giving a bad impression to child even though i never leave my house i literally don t interact with anyone and nobody see or hears me and yet i m still seen a a monster i ll do you all a favor and just die cause it s too much i m tired of living like this and if i m such a bad threat then i ll be doing every one a favor | 1 |
everyone is saying i wa abusive i wasn t i genuinely felt like jumping off a cliff and would of if a friend wasn t there | 1 |
my girlfriend left me and is probably in love with my best friend my best friend stopped giving a shit about me and flirted with her they cuddled when they were here he wouldn t even check in on me my dad is having a baby my great grandma is dying my health is getting more and more fucked over and turn out i might have a bleeding disorder my abusive ex is spreading more shit about me and trying to ruin my life nothing is ok i don t think i m going to be okay everything is falling apart i haven t felt this suicidal in a long time i want to fucking die i can t do this | 1 |
i don t deserve to be alive i m a complete and total fuck up that deserves to die i just overdosed on my clonazepam so here s hoping that it kill me | 1 |
shes been saying nasty comment about my body since i wa like they used to tell me i needed to stop eating and stuff like that snd it been destroying my body image i feel like no one will ever love me if im not unhealthily skinny i starved myself for a good while like year ago and lost a lot of weight i then hot depressed a hell and gained it all again she still say some nasty comment last night she said of course it not good that you were starvinh yourself but it mustve been so nice to find clothes that fit right dont you miss that i just want her to think im pretty and the kind of daughter she want | 1 |
not even to talk about anything it wa kind of odd actually he just said he wa on lunch and had to go back to work in 0 he just wanted to bother me for a minute i think he just saved my life go fucking figure | 1 |
i ve tried i ve put in effort i ve fought back and i did get better before it all went downhill again til i m back to square one then still i got told to try and put in more effort to fight back a if that wasn t what i have been doing to get this far to survive this far no matter how much effort i put in the end everything came back to nothing it s all meaningless they would only see the result without acknowledging nor appreciating the effort i m too tired to fight anymore i don t have anyone to talk to about my problem more like i don t have anyone that i trust enough for me to really open up to even the friend i got right now i can t feel a strong connection with them i don t even talk much with them also too scared to even talk to a therapist and seek help having to reveal my problem like that make me feel vulnerable miserable and embarrassing another reason for not seeking help is so i can break down even more until i really lose my mind and there d really be nothing better than dying i guess but mainly i hate the idea of having to reveal myself to others a i ve mentioned just before this i ve grown too tired i ve been spending a lot more time in my room playing game and barely doing anything productive outside of my work i don t have any motivation or dream sometimes i fear having to sleep at night because by the time i wake up i d have to go through another dull day again and repeat the same thing over and over again the problem is in me i can t run away from myself i wish i could just disappear from existence and it d be nice if no one would remember me at all i m going to sleep and i hope i won t wake up to greet another day but i know that ain t gon na happen will delete this post later i don t really like posting a rant like this too but i really needed to get it out a bit please don t mind this post at all and have a good day to whoever ha read this til the end | 1 |
really i m tired i tried pill choking myself with a belt hanging carbon monoxide and i can t buy a fucking gun because of the fucking country i live in so tired of this shit so tired of being loveless and before you start with you must be an incel no i don t blame woman for not liking me i blame my fucking gene and i blame my shyness and how my stupidity ha fuck thing up i m tired but i can t fucking seem to die | 1 |
doesn t seem like i m contributing enough to the world for my life to be so precious that i need to still be here i don t know how to do this but i have considered hanging myself or starting my car in a garage for the carbon monoxide my financial issue will never end my disability is chronic and it doesn t seem like there is a point in fighting any of this anymore | 1 |
no matter how hard i try i just seem to be a background character to everyone else for year i have tried to be a better person socialize more be extroverted dress nicely workout try to be friendlier love yourself yada yada yada it s all bullshit lie i told myself delusion that i thought would make me be noticed and at least somewhat respected but in the end it seems like i don t even exist it s absolutely soul crushing i feel like most people just look right through me a if i were a ghost the shadow of what once wa a person i ve never had anyone i could truly call a friend just recently my best friend told me that i wasn t even his best friend that there wa someone else that he see a his true best friend i m not angry at him just dissapointed at the circumstance i m just another shoulder to cry on for every person i talk to i ve never had a girlfriend no one ever really loved me that sting the most i constantly hear story about people and their experience with love yet here i am at 0 year old never even having kissed anyone at my age my brother already had several girlfriend so did all the other people at my age that i know i feel like a fucking clown i really am le than human i ve always been the laughingstock of the fucking world never been respected always ignored i m depressed and suicidal but most of all i m angry if people don t want to see me i will fucking force them to see me they ll have no other choice but to see me one way or another | 1 |
im tired i m so tired a tiredness that i can t describe anymore i really can t believe that my life is really the one i have now when i see myself in the mirror or just at random time during the day i can t help but have tear running down my cheek hurting myself when i m wondering how i went from an innocent happy optimistic person to a destroyed and sad who just want to die i know others can have it harder but for me that s all i can bear i can t take it anymore i m unhappy but also angry angry because i wonder why all this happened to me why do i have to live all of this at only this question will never have an answer i just deserve it idk why im writing this so late even tho no one will see it in short i ve definitely given up and this message is therefore my last straw | 1 |
know i m severely depressed but it s been like this for year i can t do another 0 year of this i turn on monday and i just so tired of this life already i have friend but there s no one i m close to no one to tell my day about not that there would be anything to talk about i do fuck all just barely surviving the day getting out of bed in the morning is so difficult i watch my friend able to go out everyday talk passionately about the thing they re interested in make plan for the future and i just wish i could do that i genuinely don t enjoy anything i m doing a degree i hate but it s too late now to change it and not be able to get out of bed to attend my lecture doesn t help i m on a waiting list for therapy but i m number so that could be up to a year wait i ve tried different antidepressant and they have done fuck all i just can t stop thinking about how it would be best for everyone if i got hit by a truck i am draining to be around i wouldn t be my own friend so god know what anyone else think my first thought about anything is negative someone asked me the other day what i want to do after university and i told them i want to be dead because in all truth that s what i want i don t want to be alive someone wanted me to do something and the first thing out my mouth wa yeah well i want to chuck myself in front of a train but we can t always get what we want didn t even mean to say it but it just always at the front of my mind and i don t even know if it s true because i m not at risk of doing anything i ve absolutely no intention of chucking myself infront of a train but i want to no longer exist sometimes i think i need to reach out to someone but who and why bother what are they gon na do i went to my gp about it and spoke to a mental health nurse but all that s done is given me antidepressant that don t work and put me on a year long waiting list i m meeting up with family for my st my and brother aunt and uncle and cousin that i haven t seen in a while all travelling to see me i should be looking forward to it but i m not i m dreading it because they ve all got their life together have something to live for they re gon na ask me how i m doing and either i lie though they will know i m not telling the truth or i m honest and bring the whole mood down and what point would telling them they can t do anything when i say i want to chuck myself in front of a train i m not just doing it for attention i don t plan to do anything of the sort but i think it s the only way i know of saying how i really feel because no other way describes it just saying i m not doing great doesn t really cut it i m doing fucking awfully and don t know how to stop it | 1 |
my boyfriend and i have been fighting so damn much it s driving me mad i love him but i can t go on like this he s narcissistic controlling go on power trip etc one time i told him about how i get thought to unalive myself fast forward maybe a couple month and he had the audacity to tell me why don t you just go k yourself like what he know my past my trauma i ve told him my trigger because of this it make it that much harder to open up about struggle my mental health for instance the other day i told him i miss how we used to text having actual convos interaction and he took it a i wa starting an argument which i told him i wasn t just wa saying how i felt well everyday after work last night it s been hell him starting argument he packed all my stuff in trash bag and wa going to kick me out over telling him my feeling but then say i don t communicate this is the same guy that i ve been with for a couple year he say i m pushing him away but he s pushing me away to the extent of even living i feel like i m going crazy and i know i m not please tell me i m not i m just tired we all know what tired mean | 1 |
title more or le i m amab non binary and at the low point of my life so far i need to talk to somebody but i m a bit scared tbh the reason being while i m having more and more s icidal thought and thinking of how pointless life is i know that i m too much of a coward to actually commit to it and i don t want to hog the space for someone who s off worse than me tl dr i don t see much point in living anymore but i just know i most likely won t km is it ok though if i call the hotline | 1 |
don t really know why i m posting don t know what to expect i already hate myself more than life itself but it is what it is i caught my wife cheating on valentine s day which wa great we tried to work thing out but apparently she would rather have him a felon drug addict i m not perfect but damn everything s just gone downhill since i don t see a point in life without her but i can t have her so idk i m so lost in every aspect of life i already know how i ll do it but i can t because i can t do that to my granny | 1 |
so first of all i know that this is all fucking messed up it is the way it is though i ve been depressed and suicidal for a while now and my ex know that aswell i promised him that i would never kill myself which i really regret but whatever i asked them a couple of time but they didn t want me to break my promise and they also said if i did they d commit suicide aswell however now my ex told me that if i told my younger brother i wa gon na do it how and why it would be okay to break the promise i just i can t i can t go to my younger brother tell him hey i m gon na km bc life suck and i m just gon na hang myself i know commiting suicide will hurt ppl around me but they will be fine except maybe my younger brother that s what i m scared for however it s so much worse though if i tell him i m gon na end my life before i do it he will feel so much more guilt and i just don t know what to do and everything hurt so much physically and mentally | 1 |
what s the actual point of stopping me from doing this it will allow a person who is suffering to not suffer any more i don t want to do this any more it s a never ending battle and i m tired say i m a quitter i don t care why do you care about the life of a person on the internet who will never contact or see you who you for all mean should not have any personal connection to you yet people still care to tell me to stop when i m that close to stopping the pain at this point i could care le about most of my family most of them are why i want myself dead anyway my friend would read the note i d be leaving and understand why i did it i know these paragraph are completely intelligible but i just don t get why suicide is a bad thing to people why do people think it s a bad thing that s the one thing i don t get | 1 |
please do not read if you re in a bad mental state currently is it painful to overdose and d e on medication can someone who ha experienced an 0verdose from a combination from the following list please explain the sequence of event adderall doxepin duexis ibuprofen famotidine pristiq abilify buspar alcohol and c0caine do any combination of these allow someone to d e in their sleep without feeling pain i know many prescription medication including some of the one previously listed are designed to make death from taking too many difficult i also know surviving an attempt can be very painful and lead to lasting negative health effect what do you do if someone is unresponsive locked in their room you d call 9 and they would be the one to break down the door and enter keeping you from seeing anything right lastly can a family cover up someone s su c de attempt and keep it a secret out of the medium can they just tell people it wa a drug 0verdose or is there no way to avoid everyone knowing what happened i m sorry for these asking these question | 1 |
i ve felt this way consistently for probably the last year with only brief deluded relief i hope that it s just eternal oblivion in a sense | 1 |
wa looking for this usually i go to bed st but today my wife is sleeping so i will go to km it wa about the time to do it | 1 |
i see no future ahead of me and i am very much fucked right now life is going too fast i cant keep up with anything i literally have no friend no one would try to find me if i go missing one day im living in this shit hole away from parent since and they dont even care about me at this point everyone can see that i am going to kill myself but no one even see me at all currently making plan if anyone find my reddit account somehow after i die take this a a sorry i wa a bad kid and became a horrible adult sorry for not doing good thing and making everyone around me sad until i have no one around me left | 1 |
i keep thinking that i m only putting all this effort in for someone else because i love her and i don t want to hurt her and i enjoy being with her and how she make me feel but i also want to get better so i can be in a better place to be more supportive for her and my peer i m trying to live for myself and not others but i m not sure where i am with that | 1 |
i dont bother doing anything all day and im failing college yet im still tired and im constantly thinking about suicide | 1 |
i feel so helpless like i have absolutely no say in my own life and i have no idea what to do anymore all i want to do is to kill myself but the way that i ve decided to do it is going to be painful and right now i ve become so mentally weak that i can t even tolerate or accept pain i wish i could just die in my sleep tonight or get hit by a bus tomorrow because i m not even strong enough to end my life no matter how much i want to | 1 |
my on and off boyfriend of two year left me after i got diagnosed with bpd le that two week ago he decided to read the bplovedones subreddit and like yeah i will not invalidate their experience but the way they speak of people with bpd is dehumanizing everything seemed fine sunday and then he read the stuff monday and dipped on tuesday i don t want to be alive because i don t want to hurt anyone else and i feel so disconnected from the world it s not because he left it s because i feel so alone and i don t want to hurt and i don t want to hurt anyone else i also feel so guilty for the shitty thing i did do i m worried i will never change and die alone i don t know who would love someone like me after what i have done | 1 |
this is eating me alive my suicidal thought depression kept me from doing thing that were very important and now that i am trying to actually do them for example i sat down to actually write on a web novel i abandoned for all of that time and the feeling of guilt over wasting so much time ha me in a choke hold it force me back into that dark place this ha been a struggle all of my life i used to have this issue with not cleaning because i beat myself over not cleaning i don t want to go back into the dark and i don t have access to treatment for my ocd anymore any advice on what i can do to help even it is okay help tremendously i ve tried l late is better than never but for some reason i can t convince my brain this is true | 1 |
i ve never been so fucking miserable in my entire life i quit my job last week and i m failing school and want to drop out for the rd time i have no money and i m disgusting and i have no worth in this shitty world i m tired and i can t even get out of bed i don t have any energy to do anything and i want to die fuck everything and goodbye | 1 |
i ve given up | 1 |
i doubt theyd care but at the same time i dont wan na die alone he s the only person i have in my life and our friendship is most likely going to end once he move away but it s going to leave me in shamble i m probably going to attempt soon after he leaf but thats the thing i dont wan na die completely alone yes i still feel a if i have nobody by my side even though we re pretty close but regardless of that i just want to die knowing at least one person will give somewhat of a fuck about me | 1 |
i have had suicidal thought since high school i am also trans and have always known it since i wa young i never felt it wa something i wa allowed to do i started transitioning a few month ago now at the age of i ve attempted suicide time in my life and i did the least almost hoping i would live or die 0 0 i ve always threatened my family that i would kill myself some of that wa a cry for help some of that is true i have planned to live perhaps extra year to see if truly a everyone tell me it s worth living just wait i believe in my heart i can be great for myself and love myself and yet i am plagued by this obtuse feeling of letting go for good almost every day i have had many therapist i have one currently i have tried med and i truly don t want them in my life i can t even complain i speak language fluently i ve experienced a lot of life and always felt like an old soul although i am disappointed with this world i am disappointed with all the hate that exists i m disappointed with myself and others consistently most day i wake up grateful and most day i go to sleep angry sad lonely and hopeless no matter how much i try to be a force of love and light in this world in the morning i end up depleted and sucked into the darkness each night i have stayed for my family and friend who would suffer if i left i have never once stayed for myself i wish i found a reason to live for myself and not for others i m planning on taking shooting lesson in this year so i may get a gun license hopefully so that i may register a firearm in year and kill myself i m not sure what i m looking for saying this on here just needed a place to say it i hope you re all well and stay strong | 1 |
i m ready to go it could be day from now week from now or even month from now but this is the only way i see myself going out and i refuse to accept any alternative i ve ghosted numerous people trying to throw their retarded empty platitude my way and a much a some of these mf wan na tell me they ve been there no the fuck they haven t i wish people could just accept the fact that some people weren t meant to live long life | 1 |
so i started having suicidal thought in april of last year and they lasted until around november in october i started hanging out with a girl and we started becoming good friend not romantic just friendship my mental health started getting a lot better after a couple month of friendship with her and it s kept getting better ever since a few day ago i made a passive aggressive comment that really upset her she won t text me back now i ve tried apologizing and trying to make thing right with her but i haven t heard back from her i m afraid i ve ruined this friendship forever and now my suicidal thought are back for the first time since last year i always hurt the people that i care about and i hate myself so much that i do this | 1 |
so i started having suicidal thought in april of last year and they lasted until around november in october i started hanging out with a girl and we started becoming good friend not romantic just friendship my mental health started getting a lot better after a couple month of friendship with her and it s kept getting better ever since a few day ago i made a passive aggressive comment that really upset her she won t text me back now i ve tried apologizing and trying to make thing right with her but i haven t heard back from her i m afraid i ve ruined this friendship forever and now my suicidal thought are back for the first time since last year i always hurt the people that i care about and i hate myself so much that i do this | 1 |
honestly im tired of everything especially myself im not good for anyone and been blocked by a friend who told me i wa toxic and manipulative im stupid and worthless why do i even deserve to live i wish there is a fast way to kill myself and end this peacefully | 1 |
last night i had a dream my bestfriend and i were hanging out a a spiritual person i believe that our passed loved one visit u in our dream to hang out with u in the only way they can my bestfriend committed a year ago and it wa the worst day of my life every once in a while he doe this but i had a dream last night we both hung out and had such a good time at the end he gave me a gift and said he would see me next time when i woke up i wa really depressed i didn t want to go into work i wanted to lay back down and go to sleep and hang out with him again it made me have suicidal thought and those were scary i miss him alot to the point where life just seems so awful without him and how can i live like this without him i m a very lonely person and he wa the only friend i had who understood me help | 1 |
i just made the person i fell in love with cry because a miscommunication happened and i ended up breaking all contact instantly and acted like a bitch but she still fought to keep in touch and we are better talking now but she cried tonight because of me she cried she got hurt she felt so bad and she is already going through so much because of her ex and then something happened with u at work yesterday and i ended up having a fight with my mom too i just fucking hate that my existence is hurtful for others i just want to fucking die so i stop hurting people god please give me the courage to die so i stop hurting everyone around me i do not want to live with all the sadness that s filled in me | 1 |
i feel it coming on hard and it s just too much i m not even full spiral i wa doing so good for so long i hate how easy it sound to end it because fuck wouldn t it just be i m just screaming into the void again i feel like quarantining when i m like this because well meaning friend will tell me they love me and it s not worth it and to push forward and they re on my side and i know it doesn t make me feel any different about myself and maybe they do too but it s so damn tiresome i hate myself and i don t think i ll ever stop i m tired of stressing them out or bringing them down by existing the cool thing about being dead is people will almost always remember the good thing about you and maybe they ll talk about how you struggled but it ll sound romantic and not nearly a disgusting a it actually feel why doe it have to be so attractive objectively speaking there s nothing sexy about about coming across the news in whatever form that a loved one ha ended their life but here i am fantasizing about how i ll just stop being and i ll be just that more loved without having to do anything but die no guilt no pressure just nothing i guess technically people will have to deal with my remains they ll have to raise money to have something done with me because i definitely don t have anything in place to make it easier i m just so fucking tired | 1 |
i m not doing well i m suffocating it s hard to breathe and i have to fight the urge to slice open an artery the only way i know how to cope is by telling someone who s actually willing to listen about my favourite comic that s all | 1 |
i miss jesus i miss the warmth warmth of the graspclasped onto me with both handsholy hand holding hand hold my handi remember i surrender to falsity and ill conceived connotation taught to believe misinformation that my purpose wa purposeful but it s all for man s profitand the only true prophet is the soothsayerand the soothsayer is an entity of many layersa coterie educates on blanket of misconceptionblanket me so i ll be warm full and fret freedisrobe me so i ll be broken open and emptyall i take is blue pill to calm mebut all i really intake is falsitythese line are just stanza so do a you willlife demand a mind of stabilitynot insanity but insane is written all over meso take your fake pill and snort up these linesor waste it all get ill and snort white lineswhite lie won t kill right get wasted don t wake up just wait for you to fucking taste itit s never enoughtake your blind pleasure freedom and delight it your birthrightfree will do a you willbut think twice before they put you on the spotlight because once they have you chained up you convert into a cenobite with no change you secure your own chainsand if you re unbothered call me deranged may a well fasten the rope and stay restrained no one s going to save you except the latter so choose a life of false glamour or have it shatterthe pain is worth itonce you re open you can truly observe it unlearn it be free from the cage or stay locked in and fall into the greyits all a fucking rat race | 1 |
i cant bear not being beatiful im a man not girl i just can t i cant begin to process how i myself and be le beatiful im gon na die soon but i havent quiited my job i make good saving each month i have some other bunch of saved money how can i have some clean fun no s x no drug or should i try to help others gift food school supply clothes to those who need it i know i can donate my eyeball and no one will care because my face isnt beatiful beauty of the face is literally what made human conciousness how do i face the use of money since i wont be needing it in old age which ill never reach | 1 |
i m tired of only having people that don t listen to me i m tired of codependency i m tired of my brain always going so fast and there s no calming it either i m fucking tired i do not want to live anymore i ve fucked up my life and there s no fixing it because it wa doomed from the start it seems like i m doing great but i m not i should be but i m not no one care about me my friend couldn t care le about what i have to say they just want me to listen i don t want to listen anymore the one person i wanted to care i realize now doesn t give a fuck about me he listens to her though she is heather and i m meaningless so i m done being in the way of the two they can have eachother i will go i m in the way that s all i ever am i m an annoying thing people can t get rid of i m a weight on everyone s shoulder i m tired of living and i m done with it | 1 |
i m currently on 0mgs daily but i just couldn t do it anymore it s all just so hard i ve only just taken them so don t have any symptom yet i ve only taken the fluoxetine and nothing else is this enough to kill me i m slightly underweight do i need to go to a hospital or just tell someone i don t know what to do i live with my parent and i feel really bad but i still don t want to live anymore | 1 |
i really fucking can t but i can t take my life either so i ll be a whiny bitch as and make my fourth post on here or something saying the same fucking thing i m so tired it hurt so much i just want the pain to stop wa fucking 0 when i first tried to km thing don t get better nope they don t year on they ve only gotten worse i really can t do this | 1 |
i ve been suicidal on and off for just over year i ve been in therapy for i ve been on antidepressant for i just got out of the psych ward for the first time and now i m in a stupid zoom partial program i ve been taught countless coping skill and way of managing difficult emotion through cbt dbt act you fucking name it they re suggesting that i go to a residential program for a few week but there s no cure for depression everyone keep talking to me about college but i can barely think a month into the future never mind a year and thinking of the whole rest of my life just stretching out ahead of me just make me exhausted i m expected to keep doing this for like 0 more year at the end of the day i just can t imagine going on like this forever and i know it get better and all that bullshit but i m so sick and tired of waiting for better sure there are better day but that just make it all the more frustrating when the bad one come i m ready for this just to be over | 1 |
life is just not for me it seems to be working out great for literally everyone else i m supposed to sit around and wait for better day or a miracle to happen what is the point my life ha 0 meaning no relationship no friend no accomplishment just emptiness im tired of living i m tired of being alone hating everything about myself my life wondering why god gave me this life just to sit here and be miserable for year meanwhile everywhere i look is family couple smile thing that i wanted but will never achieve and i give up i ll be happier gone than i ever experienced alive and the most sad part is no one will ever know i m gone i even feel stupid and sorry for myself posting this i am not looking for sympathy or anything just needed to get that out there | 1 |
i cant take no more a knock come on my door i open it and oh farewell my sweet friend darkness fill the room but the flower will soon bloom it coming to an end farewell my sweet friend i dont care anymore nor i can take no more no way out of this farewell my sweet friend | 1 |
first of all this feeling is killing me i m probably not a bad person and i ve done bad thing and hurt people and now those people have turned their back on me my trauma have haunted me i don t feel alive the whole world is in against me in my worst moment i don t want to live anymore the only thing i can offer is hate hate and hate nothing make me change i can t anymore i m going to die in vain but i can t be alive this pain go on beyond something emotional it is deeper i can t make someone believe in me i ll just do it for my pride | 1 |
i m not going to attempt suicide but i may admit myself to a mental hospital because my college class are actually sending me into hypomanic episode what doe a college do when you miss a few day or even week due to a serious mental health condition i have all a and if i lose those i will become even more unstable | 1 |
i want to preface this by stating that i haven t gone to anyone about this nor have i attempted to get help realistically it s just my mind actively stopping me because in some sick and twisted way it belief that i m okay i m and currently enrolled at georgia southern a a freshman while i have struggled with mild depression in the past it all really started going downhill when i lost my dog in june of last year my dog had to be put down and it wa heartbreaking i had to watch my parent and sister cry while i sat there trying to be strong i let myself fall into that typical stereotype that men aren t supposed to cry i regret it i wish i had shown some emotion then but it s neither here nor there at this point what matter is that she had been in my life since i wa a kid i grew up with her and it felt like my world crumbled beneath the weight of her loss my girlfriend at the time helped me through it a lot and wa an enormous amount of help when it came to my happiness at the time it didn t last however i had reluctantly enrolled into college and honestly felt forced to go the first two week honestly weren t too bad i enjoyed my time and thought i would get through pretty easy then me and my now ex broke up this absolutely crushed me having my dog put down being practically forced into college and now i just got out of the first major relationship i ve had all within the span of month it wa such a slow but inevitable spiral into the worst depression i would ever face my ex and i would continue having contact with each other for the rest of that semester she tried to help me feel better but i got so much worse i no longer had a grasp on who i wa and wa just trying to stitch myself back together again i never got better i struggled for the rest of the semester my grade were awful and my physical health had declined a good bit a well when halloween rolled around i attempted to commit suicide i took about half a bottle of melatonin which wa me trying to attempt but obviously that wouldn t work because it s melatonin i wa a dumbass who wa desperately trying to end it all with anything i could get my hand on well i lived then november passed and it wa finally december a month i enjoy because of it s stress free nature around this time my ex and i were actually recuperating we both still had feeling for each other while we never got back together december wa actually nice and i felt happy for the first time in a while then december ended and the new year came along i wanted to focus solely on bettering myself and although my ex and i were starting to somewhat get along again i wanted to cut off all contact i wasn t good for her and she wasn t good for me or that s what i believe to be true from then on i focused on myself i tried to be more sociable and tried to express my feeling more often to my friend it wa working kind of towards the end of january i attempted again at the time i felt like i had made no progress and i thought i wa stuck being a bad person forever so i used some strong prescription pain killer don t remember the name i made it pill in and vomited something must ve clicked inside me because this wa a turning point the entirety of february wa pretty good i felt happy and i enjoyed so much of life i talked to my parent about not wanting to do college and the fact that i broke up with my ex yes it took me month to tell my parent i wa scared to they were understanding and said they d let me live there a long a i had a job i also explained to them that i wanted to do something else in life then what i previously had said to them i wa majoring in computer science because i really wanted to be a programmer but realized that i didn t actually enjoy it i had tried to do some coding on the side and i just didn t have fun with it what i did have fun with though wa disc golf it wa something that helped me feel better about myself because i wa constantly improving in particular i had started to take it seriously around the beginning of january and by the time i talked to my parent i felt really confident and wa thinking of going pro in the future they shut it down because it s rare to succeed in sport and if anything it would be up to luck after that entire conversation about me not being able to be who i wanted i had signed a lease to live with my sister down near the college since we both go there i did not have any intention of going to school for a second year because it wa not good for my mental health i even told my parent that i didn t want to continue college but they said that i have to because the rent where my sister and i are going to be living is too high to pay without a student loan now i m here reluctantly signing up for class next semester all while feeling i have no purpose in life my parent won t support my actually dream and would rather me find some 9 that ll at least keep me living paycheck to paycheck so i m struggling to really know who i am still while slowing piecing myself together in an attempt to better myself i m having a shitty time in college due to several thing dragging me downwards into depression my parent won t support me in what i actually want to do and are instead forcing me to do a second year of school i just don t have the energy or motivation to keep going everything is so extremely stressful right now and it s just been all one slow build up my self image ha absolutely plummeted and i m ashamed to really even go outside anymore because i hate the way i look i feel like i have absolutely no purpose anymore because of all the mixed message i m getting from my family the only thing i don t have right now that i want is a way out i have ibuprofen that i could overdose with but i ve looked it up and it seems too painful and it probably won t kill me i have a car that i could crash of course but i don t want to drag anyone else into this nor do i feel like it s reliable enough of a way out i could try to drown myself in the lake on campus but i ve already tried drowning myself in 0 0 and that didn t pan out well i just want something simple and effective i don t have the money unfortunately i haven t found the courage motivation to get a job i want this feeling to be gone i ll still try to work on myself but a this tightening in my chest get stronger and stronger each day i m not sure i ll make it | 1 |
i just need someone to talk to or distraction and sympathy | 1 |
i want to go but i m afraid of what s there after idk religion i guess i feel pretty pathetic all the time but i m thinking like maybe in a few month sometime this year i just need clear answer on how and when the right time i guess soon i just need relief | 1 |
my story is nothing compared to everyone else here it s such a stupid reason to post i know but i still wanted to say it please hate on me if you d like cause i deserve it there this girl i recenetly met from my college program for month so far obv with everything being online i have only met her irl once at school but i have severe social anxiety and always have been an introvert since i wa in like middle school so i couldnt talk to her that day i actaully even purposly avoided her because i dont know why we also live far away from each other with the college being hour away for u both but for each others house it hour so this would be a long distance relationship if i ever asked her out which i never will but it an idea before i met her i wa always sad with my life not studying playing game all day not going outside eating unhealthy spending money unwisely no friend and also with my parent not caring about me or talking to me at all so i wa alone and lonely i wa actaully thinking about killing myself because i wa just so done with life and thought there wa nothing left to do in life but literally right after i wa thinking about suicide i met her after meeting her i have been eating healthy studying with her playing game with her exercised because she told me to and she is just someone i can always talk to we basically talk to each other everyday with over 000 message and she is really a joy to talk with ive never really liked anyone this much in my life shes just perfect shes funny kind beautiful thoughtful trustworthy sweet list go on i like her too much and it now starting to affect the thought in my head im constantly thinking everyday how im unable to always be beside her how we will only stay a friend how we cant ever hang out together like friend normally do me not being able to say a word in front of her irl it just make me so fucking sad im such a fciuking loser and i hate it i hate anxiety i hate depression i hate my life ive grown too attached to her and i just cant stop having these thought in my head im also mad ugly so im also insecure about that im back to being suicidal but idk yet today we had an in person lecture that wa mandatory and i sat in the corner a i always do far far away from the people and she came in and sat right beside me i shouldve been happy i should have been gratful that we could be together in that short moment but my anxiety got the best of me and i ran away from her left the class left the school and went back home when i came home i saw so many message she ha sent me and i havent replied yet nor have i looked at it i dont know what to do anymore thanks for reading let me know how much of a dipshit i am please | 1 |
being trans fucking suck kayleigh will never pas therapist are ghosting her so there s no help not to mention on top of that having a piece of shit father and failing school doesn t exactly help just need to end it so the pain can finally stop but too much of a pussy to do it fuck everyone who say it ll get better kayleigh ha heard that for the longest time now and not once ha it gotten better | 1 |
it hasn t gotten any better i did it almost year ago and the feeling of trying again ha gotten worse no matter how much i try it s not good enough i m trying to go to school i m trying to find a job i m trying to shower more and blah blah blah but no i m still too lazy my hair is too greasy i smell i m a fucking failure don t get why they act so much higher than me you failed that exam you got fired you didn t do the school work how the fuck are you going to look at someone who can t afford all the thing you have and blame them like it s their fault no i can t afford shampoo no i can t afford food no i can t afford a car or even the fucking lesson we couldn t wash clothes for a week but i shouldn t smell sorry let me pull out my imaginary washing machine my imaginary money to buy a car my imaginary money to buy the game you have the food you have the soap and whatever the fuck else i don t have because i don t have the fucking money let s also forget the fact my parent haven t been working properly for almost year and the amount of shit we owe which you don t deal with which is why you have all that shit they look at me in disgust you should come out more you re just lazy you don t want me there anyway which is why i walk metre behind don t have proper conversation because you wont talk back or am completely forgotten about when you go out i m fucking trying i do my best in exam i do my best to shower often or to eat often or to get a job you just don t see that i live very different to you i m trying my best to not kill myself every fucking day the thought didn t just disappear when i got out of hospital you know the same place you laugh at me for going the only reason why i don t jump in front of a car when we are together is because i don t want you to see the mess left behind i have a box full of tablet and a bottle of morphine i m sure something there will kill me and i m ok with it | 1 |
i just want the pain to end i really want to die my life is not going anywhere i ve got no friend no future etc i m just so completely exhausted and sick of it all i wish i wasn t so sensitive but i just can t take this anymore | 1 |
my therapist and psychiatrist say they can t fire me if i follow the protocol and that the program will help me work while doing iop the iop program would only be hour a day on day a week so i could still work part of the time could my job fire me for doing iop worst case scenario i would be able to bounce back but it would be difficult | 1 |
i just got done with my psychiatrist appointment i don t feel good about it medication dosage got increased again that s all my life is medication therapy trying to make thing work and get better but it never happens i feel numb i don t feel anything at all right now the pain is so overwhelming i just can t feel anything i m one day away from being three week clean it doesn t matter i really feel like i m going to kill myself today i don t have enough medication to do it here and i need another method i know nobody care not really at the end of the day nobody care i m tired of being alone i m sure it s my own fault somehow everything s always my own fault i m tired i don t want to sleep i want to die | 1 |
i feel so lost and out of control with my emotion i don t know what to do with my free time nothing seems to bring me joy i keep thinking of way to end it all without impacting my family and child but who will find me i don t want to traumatize someone i fight with my wife all the time i don t feel wanted or loved | 1 |
my best friend and i recently started hooking up and last night when we got back extremely drunk from a club i twice attempted to make a move on her which made her really uncomfortable i didn t remember the event and she told me this morning my friendship is ruined and i don t know what to do now i would never intentionally make her feel uncomfortable and i hate myself for what happened i don t want or think i can get any redemption and i want to end it | 1 |
it s that bad | 1 |
it too much for me to ask one person in the world to like me | 1 |
this is it | 1 |
feel like there s just too many problem to address at this point everyday i try to hold out in hope of something somehow getting better but it somehow feel like i m never at the bottom of the hill at this point i m only alive so that some people don t feel sad or guilty but honestly i m getting to a point where i don t really give a shit if i m dead i won t have to experience or see the pain that they will ultimately feel from the death so who give a shit | 1 |
when i female wa a very young kid i wa exposed to unrestricted internet access i watched a lot of porn and i recently remembered at time i would watch bestiality and animal mating i wa young and didnt know what i wa watching i didnt know what the feeling i wa having were i remember once i tried to get my dog to lick me when i wa it didnt happen because thank god i realized how weird it wa and stopped before anything happened im now and not attracted to animal at all im scared that maybe i wa when i wa young but i wonder maybe i wasnt attracted to them just curious to sex of all kind because i wasnt aware of it at the time im experiencing suicidal thought and so worried i should kill myself do you think i should kill myself am i overreacting im desperate for advice and reassurance but if i dont deserve reassurance go ahead and tell me how disgusting a human i am | 1 |
i don t understand i read it would be lethal to take this much at once but i feel perfectly fine i know i m just going to get a bunch of people telling me to go to a hospital but what s up with this shouldn t i be dead | 1 |
my dad killed himself and it left me with a feeling like i want to kill everyone in my family who s moved on since then i m his only child my brother is now a stranger to me my mother is my father s killer i am his only survivor i want to kill myself | 1 |
i d love to just to die i dont have friend or family member that care about me haha no one will be sad when im gone which is good honestly but like i mentioned the possibility of religion being real scare me and it the only reason thats stopping me from ending it one day i wont care and i ll do it but it not today sadly | 1 |
your life your rule but why can t i finally make myself rest it s selfish but isn t making someone stay just for you to not feel bad also is they ll stop you but will only make you feel alone after a few week or so shouldn t we all ultimately live for ourselves why is suicide such a bad thing is it just because it s deemed morally wrong all of this ha probably been said a couple time i m sorry it s funny how the only thing that keep me going is that one musical group and my other hobby is this really it | 1 |
thing are not going to get better so why cant i just find the courage to die cant even cut cause school just found out and took all my blade | 1 |
i wake up feeling guilty everyday i truly do feel like people would be happier without me of course i know that s not true but the feeling eats away at my soul everyday all i can constantly think about is the money that s ha been spent on me i feel sick looking at myself in the mirror i don t feel worthy for myself i don t feel worthy for others either i just want to be enough i just want to feel normal doing the simplest thing like breathing fill me with dread and worry when i m around others i ve never had a super close friend though i never really got out a a kid i never really felt understood i find it hard to believe that one day i will feel comfortable with myself because this feeling ha plagued me ever since i wa a child i look forward to when i sleep because that s when i m not limited and i feel free the thought of dying painlessly and giving into the void is what soothes me when i m stressed or sad i want to keep going but it s been so long of me being useless i don t know how to catch up i feel so much dread in simply existing | 1 |
title every day is a struggle gym help a bit but it s temporary i can t take this life anymore for long | 1 |
i got into fasting couple of year ago and trained myself to go long without food i did month of just coffee and water last year im not joking i didnt die because i wa very overweight i lost a lot of weight and gained some back doe to depression eating this time iam going to push myself till i collapse i know i can dont ask me why it unfixable thats about it hope that yall are better | 1 |
hey guy today i opened up to my boyfriend for the first time in a while about all the mental turmoil i ve been going through a part of me want to cut it off i love him dearly but i just feel like i ll be a burden to him for the rest of my life if i stay is it selfish to leave or selfish to stay if i knew he d be fine if i knew he d make it and be happy with someone else one day i would leave i would spend all the money i have chasing fleeting happiness until i m ready to go i wish i could erase the memory from his head so he can just know peace | 1 |
commit suicide or selfharm | 1 |
tagged nsfw tw mention of suicidal ideation and suicide attempt the idea of suicide is comforting it is all that i ve known the idea of ending the constant misery i feel is weirdly enough the only thing stopping me from doing it besides a select number of friend a it truly is comfortable to me to be sitting in the cesspool of apathy and hatred for myself i feel every day usually when i m depressed i feel the apathy and it slowly just turn to numbness but something is different this time around do you ever feel almost the thrill of suicide or rather do you ever almost feel excitement when you re done grieving what your life could would have been lately i ve felt at peace over my self grieving and i do not like that a i have been desperately trying to stay afloat and the tiny push i would usually give myself to ground myself is gone i ve only ever felt this rush when i attempted and the aftermath destroys me every single time this feeling is almost like some time of euphoric high that i cant stop chasing i hate my life and i hate feeling like this but aren t some people meant to be dished the worst card to balance out nature | 1 |
this is pointless this is all pointless living loving everything there only one thing one person i want more than death and i can t have him nobody want me around so whats the point of wasting my time suffering for no reason when all i do is waste air and people time a i force them to hang out with me nobody actually seek to hang out with me it s always me being lonely and wanting to hang out and them not having any excuse to say no they are indifferent if i leave or not indifferent if i die or not maybe i d get a pity aww like if a friend family member died you don t know them you just say aww out of sympathy sometimes i want sympathy i want someone to pretend for just a moment that they want me and they want to hug me and truly mean it people think i m always just saying depressing thing to fish for sympathy and hell what if i am maybe i need it maybe i need someone to actually care even for just a second about how shitty my life is my mind constantly go in circle awful stupid terrible circle of hatred i hate myself i hate the people around me i hate life i cut the people around me out of my life for their sake and mine and all it doe it make me hate myself and them even more im so desperate i can hardly stop myself from crawling back to them even though it only hurt me more i don t know how to solve this suicide is so painful and i m a pussy so there aren t many option i don t think i can stand to make it more year to be to buy a gun there ha to be something i can do in the mean time anyone with idea lmk lt | 1 |
this decision is final hopefully i don t get forced to take my anti depressant they make me sleepy which completely remove my motive to get up and start sawing thanks for reading i guess | 1 |
i m not interested in life there thing i d like to do but i have no money to experience them i dont have friend or any girl to share a relationship with life is bland i have a job interview tomorrow i ll probably get it now i ll have to show up and sell 0hrs of my life doing something i could care le about for some money i hate everything it s not enjoyable pandemic ruined everything a girl i started really liking doesn t want to see me anymore because i m not vaxed that one definitely hurt a bit she went cold on me please skip the anti pro vax debate i m over it amp i m not anti i dont like leaving the house or dealing with people i dont see any point in this thing called life it just drain me and i d like it to end it simply exhausting amp i get 0 enjoyment from it it feel like a sadistic game i just want it to end i wont hurt myself i dont think i will i dont know if i m depressed i either feel nothing or anger i envy people who are blissfully happy enjoying life i d give anything to have that i dont need everything to be great but i d at least like to not hate day to day life i dont have much left in me anymore i dont see the point in continuing playing this dumb game of collecting money for thing and meaningless relationship i want to be nothing | 1 |
let say i m on probation and let say i have a few traffic citation let also say that i could very well be put in prison for not paying those citation but let include that i don t have any money what would happen to those citation and the probation if i were to end it i ve been miserable for year every thing that happens to me is literally just the worst shit you could think of i m exceedingly mentally ill with a disorder that ha with no cure and can t be treated with medication i don t want to do this anymore so what will happen to all of those cost | 1 |
i think everybody on the internet forgets that the people they talk to online are actual people behind the screen people with real life with friend and family and their own personal issue i know it s hard to remember that sometimes especially when everybody just publicly post when they are at their best and doesn t want to share any of the negative or boring part of their life but everybody here is a real person people on the internet have a startling lack of empathy never even a little bit taking into consider anyone else s feeling or experience people just say awful thing and are surprised when others retaliate people these day especially younger teen are so terrible at understanding that other people may have life apart from what they are willing to show online and i think that is going to have devastating consequence on them a they get older | 1 |
anybody 0 year old and up in south florida that want to talk | 1 |
everyone say talk to u we re here but when i tell them i want to order off of uber eats and leave my door open so when the delivery guy come he ll find me hanging and that way my family and friend won t have to find my rotting corpse day later they re like what the fuck i don t know if i ll do it but i feel like buying a rope practice tying a noose and planning it out i don t know if it s dangerous to do this because i ll finally have everything i need to actually kill myself or maybe doing it will actually make me chicken out and want to stay around a little bit longer also i don t want to leave my family saddled with my death so i sometimes think about crashing my car on the highway so it look like an accident and my insurance pay them out i want to be able to tell people that this is what i m thinking but when i even begin to let them in it s terrifying for them they want to tell my best friend or my mom or my doctor but nobody is actually there to just listen and not react so i m stuck with these thought on my own | 1 |
i ve been really struggling with suicidal thought these past few week currently i am in a situation where i do not have access to any professional help therapy i ve isolated myself during this time a well so i ve not talked to my friend recently honestly i don t know what to do i ve been thinking about talking to a friend about this but i don t want to be a burden or trauma dump | 1 |
i can barely live with me i am all the time closed in my mind i can not describe it better i can not focus on anything i can not sustain a conversation i get very overwhelmed by everything if i do very little house cleaning i get very overwhelmed i feel lonely in my life nobody understands me neither my wife nor my parent or brother or grandparent i might be on the autistic spectrum i am so done with my life so done i can not continue like this anymore i have to die i live on my wife s incoming i so want to die | 1 |
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