Datasets:

---

Nidhogg-zh

/

Multi-Questioner_Dialogue

like 3

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, why? What’s wrong?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Whuh, are we still doing the dumb thing? Okay, why, what’s wrong?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No. Jamba Juice is for heroes. And that’s what we’re going to be." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you doing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Following in the footsteps of Kirk, Crunch and Kangaroo. (Walks outside) Geology isn’t a real science! (Gets hit by countless paintball pellets)" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Please, tell me how I can fix it." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Glad you asked. As I see it, there’s a simple solution. Your lips had a dalliance with the lips of another woman. It seems only logical that to restore balance to the relationship, you should find another man and dally with him. And by dally, I mean some hardcore mouth-on-mouth action." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You know how I know we’re not in The Matrix?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "If we were, the food would be better." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you doing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I think I might have tartar buildup. My tongue won’t go as far forward as it used to." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You’re right. My apologies." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What the hell are you guys playing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It’s a game we invented. It’s called Counterfactuals." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, can I ask you a question?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Is it about the rotational symmetries you should be figuring out or your fake caffeine problem?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Howard, can I ask you a question?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, this box only covers my work through nursery school. There’s a good deal more to come. I didn’t really hit my academic stride until I cut out that time-suck known as playing outdoors." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So, you’re going to spend hours and hours combing through all this stuff?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s a good point. My time is much too valuable. You know, perhaps I should find someone to do it for me. You know, someone with a rudimentary understanding of science, but whose real talents lie in menial labour." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You’re okay, if you run into crocodiles just kick them with your boots." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Want to catch me up?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well let’s see, uh, she attempted to open her apartment with her car key, because her face is overly Midwestern, um, she hasn’t had sex in six months, and she ate a fly." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Gentlemen, I am ready to work. To quote The Martian, let’s science the faeces out of this. That’s The Martian the book and The Martian the movie, not Marvin the Martian. Although to quote Marvin the Martian, I claim this planet in the name of Mars." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Are you okay?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, I’m fantastic, never been better. I had my first energy drink and I feel great. Hey, you guys want to wrestle? We can do arm, thumb, mud, sumo. Nah, we’re not fat enough, or wearing diapers." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Yeah, not to be confused with the French Fry Goodness Inventory. That’s pure Cooper." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So, this is accurate?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It’s been around for 25 years, and has been extensively corroborated by other researchers." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Uh, Alex, a moment. I need a word with Dr. Hofstadter. Do you think it’s appropriate for her to sit with us, given her station?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Given her what?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "If I’ve learned anything from British television shows on PBS, it’s that servants dine downstairs with their own kind." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It’s a kindness, Leonard. Otherwise, you’re cruelly tempting them with a glimpse of a world that’s just beyond their soot-stained fingertips." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No, I can do this. I just, I just need another energy drink. Oh, no." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I want another one." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s a craving. That’s a sign of chemical dependency." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You only had one." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No, I know, but plenty of things are addictive after a single exposure. I mean, crack cocaine, nicotine, Pringles. You know once one pops one just can’t stop." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What do you mean, he’s getting deported?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I believe it means that the U.S. Government is going to expel him from the country. He could then either return to his native India, emigrate to another country that’s willing to accept him, or wander the high seas as a stateless pirate. Personally, I’d choose pirate." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why are you reading Pride and Prejudice?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’ll tell you why. Amy ruined Raiders of the Lost Ark for me, so now I’m trying to find something beloved to her and ruin that." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Let’s see what I’ll be washing that succotash down with. A pitcher of margaritas." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Do you really want that?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s the great thing. It doesn’t matter. My mind is freed up to think about more important things." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, Leonard. Now, how can you not get that?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "In what universe is that a present?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It’s not a present, it’s the present. Look. There’s you and me. There’s Penny and Amy. We’re playing Pictionary. In the present." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "My point is, if Koothrappali is moving on to a new life of shallow, undeserved fame, perhaps this is an opportunity to create a better cohort." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You want to breed a new friend?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s one option, but who has the time? But consider this, the Japanese, they’re doing some wonderful work with artificial intelligence, now, you combine that with some animatronics from the imagineers over at Disney, next thing you know, we’re playing Halo with a multi-lingual Abraham Lincoln." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Yeah, I actually have information about Raj that would be helpful with this discussion." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Could you tell us?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Let’s see. (Rolls dice) Snake eyes. Sorry, bud." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Unlike Hot Tub Time Machine, this couldn’t be more simple. When Biff gets the almanac in 1955, the alternate future he creates isn’t the one in which Marty and Doc Brown ever use the time machine to travel to 2015. Therefore, in the new timeline, Marty and Doc never brought the time machine…" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wait. Is brought right?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Marty and Doc never had have had brought?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yes." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Not a chance." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you doing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "He said be honest, so I was honest. Didn’t your mother tell you? It’s the best policy. So, what do you say?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Me. Sorry, Leonard." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Seriously? You’re not coming?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You heard her. How can I argue with me?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "So Leonard, how goes the mimesis?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Mimesis?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You know. Mimesis. An action in which the mimic takes on the properties of a specific object or organism. Mimesis." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What the hell are you talking about?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’m attempting to communicate with you without my meaning becoming apparent to those around you. Let me try again. Have the indigenous fauna accepted you as one of their own? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, excuse me. That was not a betrayal, that was an experiment to determine at what concentration food starts tasting mothy." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You put moths in my food?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "For science." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Pay attention, Leonard. That’s why she can’t play on Sunday." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Who is this Justin?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Your turn, Leonard." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What was your first clue?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Uh-oh! Industrial accident." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Of course. Excuse me. This will just take a moment." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "When did we get a wall safe?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "When there was no more room in the floor safe." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "When did we get a floor safe?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "When we got the security camera." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "There’s a security camera?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Aquaman, protecting your home since 2012." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, not junior rodeo. What did you do?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I had no choice, Leonard, she ruined laundry night." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What brought this on?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I realized something. When Amy was in my life, I was hyper-focused on my work and ignored her." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why isn’t this bothering you? Isn’t your brain getting itchy? This is on your card. This could be ruining your credit score. Why isn’t this making you crazy?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, I have something to tell you, but I want you to promise not to flip out." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Seven years ago, I found out the DVD was late and I paid for it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I was going to mention it at the time, but then I thought, some day, this might be a teachable moment." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Cuddles?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Yes, Cuddles. We cuddled. Grow up, Leonard." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It doesn’t matter. That’s my spot." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Maybe they reassigned it because you never use it." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, I’m not using my nipples, either. Maybe they should reassign those." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Why are you such a stupid head? That is also rhetorical. I’m sorry you had to hear that." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Are you really going to be on NPR?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Yes, they’re interviewing me by phone from my office, regarding the recent so-called discovery of magnetic monopoles in spin-ices. It’s pledge week and they’re trying to goose the ratings with a little controversy." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why do I bother talking to you people?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "If it’ll make you feel better, we rarely listen." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Ba-ba-ba-ba. Are you sure you want to include him in this?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Include me in what? Is there a plot afoot? I’ll have no truck with plots." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No. That’s it. I am calling campus security. You prepare for the scolding of your life." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you idiots doing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "He’s trying to kill me, Leonard. Video games and rock music have desensitized him to violence." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Since when do you hum songs?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "What are you talking about?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You were just humming." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Are you sure? Sometimes when my brain really gets moving, it makes noise." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How does your brain feel about calculating the surface tension of the domain walls?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Let’s see. Hey, I was humming. One point for Hufflepuff. What song is that?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Bah, bam, bum-bum, bah, bum, bum. This song is never going to stop. Have you ever dealt with something so relentlessly irritating?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s a trick question, right?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, I shouldn’t be surprised. There’s a rich history of brilliant minds descending into madness." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, I would, but I’m on my way out." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Where?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Texas." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Is someone sick?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Yes. My sister’s uterus came down with a baby." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What would I even say?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Zack, I’m sorry you’re stupid. Have a Milk Dud." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Would you just look inside?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, a scroll. I like scrolls. They’re my third favourite system of transmitting the written word. After stone tablets and skywriting. You have all been summoned to join a thrilling Dungeons and Dragons adventure. Your quest begins in a secret northern village of elves who have all been massacred. I like where this is heading. Your task is to rescue their leader from a dungeon of ogres. Oh, that’s a saucy twist. That leader’s name, Santa Claus. No, no, no." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How about the toaster oven?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "What did the toaster oven ever do to you?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No, I was wrong. The looming threat of being crushed under a pile of lumber does add a certain spice. I’ve never felt so alive. (Answers door) Oh, hello, Alex. Uh, let me go get you last night’s recordings." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What recordings?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, you remember when you told me I talk in my sleep? Well, it occurred to me that, like most things I say, it’s probably pure gold. So I started recording it all, and now Alex gets to comb through eight hours of what I like to call Sheldon After Dark." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Did you at least have a good flight down there?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It was fine. Other than the weird-tasting juice Amy gave me, I slept the whole way." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Satisfied?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Hardly. Consider this unlikely but very plausible scenario. A young woman alone in the big city. Her ridiculous dream of becoming an actress lies shattered about her." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Huh, yeah?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Get him out." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Something you’d like to share? A tale of woe perhaps." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Fifteen years old. Dennis Kim is fifteen years old, and he’s already correcting my work. Today I went from being Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart to… you know, that other guy." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, is that really necessary?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, I believe it is. This is trash talk, and trash talk is a traditional component in all sporting events. Kripke, your robot is inferior and it will be defeated by ours because ours exceeds yours in both design and execution. Also, I’m given to understand that your mother is overweight." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, here’s another one. I wish that the apple pancake mix was on the top shelf because it starts with an A, but I don’t put it there because I don’t want you breaking one of your little legs when you’re supposed to be making my breakfast." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Is it my turn to talk about the compromises I make?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I wasn’t done, but go ahead. He said, compromising." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, hello." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you doing here?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Actually, I came to speak to Mrs. Davis." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Now, this isn’t about us, this is about what’s best for the asteroid." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, what are you thinking of naming it?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I haven’t settled on anything yet." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, will you steam my uniform next?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Interesting. Do you recall this conversation? Leonard, want to go halfsies on a steamer? No, Sheldon, we don’t need a steamer. Looks like that rumpled chicken’s come home to roost." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You know, the more I think about it, the mobster sauce couldn’t possibly contain chunks of mobster." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And why is that?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It was listed under seafood." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What if they were mobsters who slept with the fishes?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, are we having a serious conversation or not?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Ooh, sounds like that fellow knows what he’s talking about. I’d put on my listening ears if I were you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What did you do?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I found a hack online. I was able to upload MP3 recordings of my voice to your GPS." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "In anticipation of their arrival, I’ve bagged some evidence. One of the thieves had the audacity to quench his thirst while ransacking our home. You should be able to pull some good prints off this. And now, here are my prints so you can rule me out as a suspect." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What about me?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’m sorry, Leonard. It’s too early to discount the possibility of this being an inside job." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, my goodness. Where do I begin? For instance, my laptop contained four out of the five gedanken experiments necessary for a cogent restatement of the quantum measurement problem." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How is that going to help them?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, they could monitor scientific publications and see if anyone posts such a cogent restatement in the next couple of months. If so, the authors are most likely in possession of my stolen laptop." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What? Where is this coming from?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, she might be drunk. All she had was chips." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "My new computer came with Windows 7. Windows 7 is much more user-friendly than Windows Vista. I don’t like that." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Don’t you think looking for a new city to live in is a bit of an overreaction?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Our apartment was broken into, our security system tried to kill me, and as a result, I’m leaving Pasadena forever. Tell me how that’s overreacting." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, you are my roommate, my source of transportation and you help me fold my sheets when they come out of the dryer. You are safe." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Can I whistle?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Don’t be silly. Howard, you do not have a PhD, your cologne is an assault on the senses and you’re not available for video games during the Jewish high holidays." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I am moving on. I’m going to be a Bozite." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "They call themselves Bozites?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "They should. It’s one of the first things I plan to bring up upon arrival." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You know, I’ve given the matter some thought, and I think I’d be willing to be a house pet to a race of super-intelligent aliens." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Interesting." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Ask me why." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Do I have to?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Of course. That’s how you move a conversation forward." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "The learning opportunities would be abundant. Additionally, I like having my belly scratched." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I came to tell you I’ve got the answer." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really? You figured out the graphene problem?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No, no, I’m still hopelessly stuck on that, but I figured out how to figure it out." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "And send." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What did you write?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’m done hiding from bullies. I’m taking this into the real world." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What does that mean?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I told him we’ll meet him face-to-face anytime, anywhere." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Excuse me?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "She’s my twin sister, she thinks she’s funny but frankly I’ve never been able to see it." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh. Well, I guess it’s fixed." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Just look at the board." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s wrong." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, no, what should we have done differently?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, first of all, you can’t use relativistic and non-relativistic vectors in the same equation." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Excuse me. I have a girlfriend. I’m already king of the train store." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So, what do you say?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, what choice do I have? You need me. I’m like the crankshaft of this team." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Sheldon is not going." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really? What do we tell Siebert?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Tell him Dr. Cooper feels that the best use of his time is to employ his rare and precious mental faculties to tear the mask off nature and stare at the face of God." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Power failure. Implementing power-failure protocol." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What happened to all your glow-in-the-dark-emergency-exit stuff you had painted on the floor?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, that was wildly carcinogenic. Anyway, it’s too bad you’re no longer entitled to the full benefits of my friendship, because I happen to be extremely prepared for such an emergency. Please try not to see anything by this light. It’s not for you." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wait, wait. What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Cocoa, Leonard. Focus. I’m down in the dumps here." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why don’t you just eat in your desk chair?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Why don’t I just eat in my desk chair?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why are you crouching there?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "This is my spot. Where else am I supposed to crouch?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why do I always have to carry the heavy stuff?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, it’s very simple. In our ragtag band of scientists with nothing to lose, I’m the smart one, Wolowitz is the funny one, and Koothrappali is the lovable foreigner who struggles to understand our ways and fails. That leaves you, by default, as the muscle." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "My apologies Leonard, I’m only as good as my teacher." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why are you learning Chinese?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I believe the Szechuan Palace has been passing off orange chicken as tangerine chicken and I intend to confront them." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "No. It’s true. It means that we care so much about each other, there’s enough left over for an eight-ounce reptile." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why a turtle?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "After much deliberation, we’ve determined that a turtle is the ideal pet. They don’t shed fur, they don’t make noise." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Fascinating." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "It appears to be a Lord of the Rings ring." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s he doing here?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "We’re going to work this office situation out like gentlemen. And if that doesn’t work, I’m going to poison his tea." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you doing?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’m trying to raise the temperature in here before my nipples tear through my shirt." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Aha! Good question. It turns out the thermostat for my new office isn’t in my new office. No. It’s next door, in Professor Davenport’s office, who is currently enjoying the hot flashes associated with menopause." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why is there a hole here?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Why is there a hole in my new office? I’ve narrowed it down to two possibilities: There was something in the wall that someone outside the wall wanted, or the more disturbing, there was something in the wall that wanted out." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Despite my deep love of chess, lasers and aerosol disinfectant, I must forfeit." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "– Because it’s almost eleven o’clock." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "So, Penny has a don’t knock on my door before eleven o’clock  or I punch you in the throat rule." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Hello? Oh, Chancellor Morton, how are you, sir? Yes, I was expecting your call (aside) three years ago. I see. Wait. What happens if I choose not to give a speech? Uh-huh. And if I don’t want to forfeit the award? Well, you’ve got that tied up in a neat little bow. All right. Thank you. (Hangs up) Problem." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "They expect me to give a speech at the banquet. I can’t give a speech." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I am perfectly comfortable speaking to small groups. I cannot speak to large crowds." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What, to you, is a large crowd?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Any group big enough to trample me to death. General rule of thumb is 36 adults or 70 children." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "W-W-Wait, what’s going on?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I assume you’re referring to the sea shanty. It’s a rhythmic work song designed to increase productivity." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, what’s wrong with it?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "– What’s wrong with it?" } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Penny, this is your enterprise, so it’s ultimately your decision, but based on the quality of his work, I’d strongly recommend that we let Leonard go." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You want to fire me?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "What I want is irrelevant. This is Penny’s decision. Penny?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s going on?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "They stole everything, Leonard, everything." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, my God, what did they get?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "What didn’t they get? They got my enchanted weapons, my vicious gladiator armour, my wand of untainted power, and all my gold." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You called the police because someone hacked your World of Warcraft account?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "What choice did I have? The mighty Sheldor, level 85 blood elf, hero of the Eastern kingdoms, has been picked clean, like a carcass in the desert sun. Plus, the FBI hung up on me." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Can we please stop saying coitus?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Technically that would be coitus interruptus." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Should I say something? I feel like I should say something." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "You? No, you’ll only make it worse." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I have a plan to work on both projects simultaneously. And for your information, the summer conference on algebraic topology at Caltech is nerd prom." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m sorry, what is this plan you have?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, I’m not needed at both places at the same time. And I can also free up extra hours with simple tricks, such as using a minimal amount of words to convey my point." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Hu-u-u-uh…. Hu-u-u-uh!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Problem?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "This is Thai food." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, I’m not needed at both places at the same time. And I can also free up extra hours with simple tricks, such as using a minimal amount of words to convey my point." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "When does that start?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Soon. See, I could’ve said in the near future, but I didn’t say in the near future, because in the near future is three more words than soon. In, one, the, two, near, three, future, four. See, in the near future is four, soon is just one, four is more than one, saving time already." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Uh, no, thank you. We now know why MasterCard sent me a fraud alert." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Ask him." }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Um, yes. Howdy, partner. Do you happen to recollect if I left a notebook in these here parts?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Are you sure you want to do this?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "The magazine articles suggest that one of the ways to get over a breakup is a new look." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’ve been thinking about Dr. Greene’s efforts to make science palatable for the masses." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, yeah? What about it?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "That’s all. I’ve just been thinking about it. Now, I’m thinking about fractal equations. Now I’m thinking about the origin of the phrase train of thought. Now I’m thinking about trains." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Oh, I don’t want a broken toy. (Switches them back again. Penny and Leonard enter.) Nothing!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Nothing. I said nothing." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Leonard, do you recall when I said that I was going to revolutionize humanity’s understanding of the Higgs boson particle, and you said, Sheldon, it’s two a.m., get out of my bedroom?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Like it was ten hours ago. What about it?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Well, I believe I’ve done it. And I’m only saying believe to sound modest, because, sweet Sam Houston, I did it." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "All right. I officially reinstate Anything Can Happen Thursday." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Great, what do you want to do?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I don’t know. What do you want to do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Are you kidding? Yes. What did you have in mind?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "I’ll tell you exactly what you should do, avoid the presumption of the Terran sensory input paradigm." } ]

[ { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Three." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really?" }, { "from": "Sheldon", "value": "Two." } ]