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What's long and smells like shit? the unemployment line. | true |
How do you get a girl from the midwest to s your d? dip it in ranch. | true |
Fact: there are 80,000 ways to drink a starbucks beverage | false |
12 sporty watches under $100 that have us ready for spring (photos) | false |
Robert kuttner isn't the only one who needs to hear more prophetic voices | false |
Girl you remind me of this steak i have no steak | true |
How art helped an lgbtq woman survive incarceration | false |
What did the socialist use before candles? electricity. | true |
What do you say when only the egg remains? it's all ovum now | true |
Do you like pudding? bill cosby liked pudding his dick where it didn't belong. | true |
Modeling agencies enabled sexual predators for years, former agent says | false |
What did zero say to eight? nice belt! | true |
Miranda lambert, blake shelton get mushy on twitter | false |
Palin: 'waterboarding is how we'd baptize terrorists' if i were in charge | false |
What does an elderly composer use as a walking aide? a zimmer frame | true |
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? sneakers( iknow its old but its nice) | true |
Nestle, danone both possibly price-fixed infant formula milk in china | false |
Why are fish always on drugs? they just keep getting hooked. | true |
Omg, the duchess of cambridge is vogue uk's june cover star | false |
What's a white supremacist's favourite fast food restaurant? kkkfc | true |
I like my coffee, like i like my women... i don't like women. | true |
Question for waitresses who have served a mohel... ...did they leave a tip? | true |
Jail isn't supposed to be fun why do they get bunk beds? | true |
Q: what did one ass cheek say to the other? a: together we can stop this shit | true |
What is et short for? he's got little legs. | true |
How the honey bee health coalition is helping the honey bee crisis | false |
I sneezed and my bra unsnapped. i think this cold is trying to seduce me. | true |
Men redefining the glass ceiling of gender inequality | false |
Report aims to bust stigma against military men who face sexual assault | false |
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? nothing, they just waved. | true |
These are the best tweets from the jeff sessions hearing | false |
Fifa approves 48-team world cup as of 2026 | false |
Donald trump's fundraising cut hillary clinton's money advantage in half in june | false |
How effective is your resting place to create what moves heart and soul? | false |
Why did the computer scientist die in the shower? the shampoo bottle put him in an infinite loop. | true |
New york prepares for protests as grand jury reviews eric garner's death | false |
It's called common sense... 5 super obvious tips for wedding guests that are always missed | false |
Why rants on sharpton, nan and the #justiceforall march are immature, insensitive and irresponsible | false |
Should republicans blame the tsa for their loss? (video) | false |
The highs and lows of the 2017 golden globes | false |
Too-real ad shows why you can never fully prepare for kids | false |
What gets less rain than the sahara desert? the sun! | true |
(nsfw) i made my girl so wet last night... ...that bitch is still crying... | true |
What is whitney houston's favorite kind of coordination? haaaand eeeeeeyyyyyeeeee!!!!! | true |
What did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe? mitosis! | true |
I heard this joke about a monorail it's a great one-liner. | true |
What do you call an islamic pilot? a pilot, you racist. | true |
Civil rights commission implores holder to take stronger action on ferguson | false |
Syrian refugee barber provides haircuts to iraqis displaced by violence | false |
How do you kill a poet? give them real self confidence. | true |
15 guilt-free ways to enjoy your favorite carbs | false |
I used to do drugs i still do, but i used to too | true |
I used to hate having athlete's foot... ...but it's growing on me | true |
What do jimmy saville and lady thatcher have in common? they both fucked miners in the 80s. | true |
Why didn't the witch wear panties.... so she could grip the broom better. | true |
Republicans gear up for the great grouse war of 2014 | false |
People actually care about you! just try missing a couple of payments, you'll see! | true |
365 invocations to create an extraordinary life, week 9 | false |
China warns u.s. not to open pandora's box, unleash trade ills on world | false |
David levitz, youtube personality, discusses gay male body image, eating disorders | false |
'snl': obama explains how sequester will affect job cuts (video) | false |
Life isn't a garden, so don't be a hoe. | true |
Why is wrestling stupid?? it's a bunch of guy's without pants fighting for a belt.... | true |
Let's turn america's military-industrial complex into a science-industrial complex | false |
Did you hear about the farmer who was also a comedian i heard all his jokes were corny | true |
Inaugural vases by lenox presented to obama and biden: all about those official gifts (photos) | false |
'watership down' author richard adams dead at 96 | false |
Did you hear about the sexually frustrated lawyer? he got off on a technicality. | true |
I haven't slept for three days, because that would be too long. | true |
Q: what's green and yellow and hangs from trees? a: gorilla snot. | true |
Grow food at home: garden planning no matter where you live | false |
I'm not superstitious, i'm just a bit stitious. | true |
Girlfriends are similar to chrome they use too much of your resources | true |
At least 5 ferguson officers have been named in excessive force lawsuits | false |
Kate moss in playboy: preview photo shows model doing her best bunny | false |
One republican is holding up a flint-inspired senate water bill | false |
Invoice generator lets you bill trump for your birth control copay | false |
Why are indian styled arranged marriages relatively stable compared to westernized societies? | false |
What do you call a jewish dilemma? free ham | true |
Prince harry and meghan markle make first public appearance of 2018 | false |
More evidence that coffee is safe for your heart | false |
The hardest part about having a beard washing the smell of pussy out of it everyday. | true |
Jindal: westboro baptist members who protest funerals face arrest | false |
You know you're getting old when speed limits start to seem reasonable to you. | true |
Why the definition of success needs a serious face lift | false |
What does a pescatarian librarian eat when they're hungry for a little snack? microfiche. | true |
How do drown a hipster? in the main steam | true |
Ruth bader ginsburg's eulogy for antonin scalia shows why politics shouldn't divide us | false |
Free speech and identity verification: combating the challenge of trolling | false |
Evangeline lilly debuts dramatic hair makeover at 'hobbit' premiere (photos, poll) | false |
What's the best part of having sex with twenty seven year olds? there are twenty of them. | true |
Every website requiring subscription would like to wish you a happy birthday today! | true |
Hbo is about to premiere a series about an attractive, conniving pope | false |
Butch lesbians open up about a big misconception about their sex lives | false |
I had a track accident last spring... now it has become a running joke. | true |
What does an academic call masturbation? his seminal work. | true |
The wall clock at work seems to be stuck on half past f*ck this sh*t o' clock. | true |
Why do people prefer shooting stars to vegetables? because they're meteor | true |
Way less people would sneeze in public if we replaced bless you with nice filthcloud. | true |
What do you call a masterbating cow? beef stroganoff! | true |
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