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stringlengths 31
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| humor
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|---|---|
Once i've read about the perils of alcoholism i've decided to stop... ...reading. | true |
Can women really make you a millionaire?? the answer is yes only if you are already a billionaire | true |
Would you slap your cousin for $1,000,000? i'd do it for free, bitch. | true |
Who was the fattest member of nsync? joey fatone | true |
How much does a midget stripper with three kids get paid? mini-mom wage. | true |
Sometimes you have to end a relationship because of the way they chew. | true |
Can a french friar end the 21st-century slave trade? | false |
Why ian mckellan thinks gay men are more masculine than straight men | false |
Why do peasants watch the weather channel? to get the serf report | true |
What does ramen and ketchup taste like together? poverty. | true |
Mother's day parade shooting: at least 17 wounded during new orleans festivities | false |
Three elephants fell off a cliff. two fell on land. one fell in the water. boom-boom-chhh! | true |
Cooking off the cuff: chestnuts - but not old chestnuts | false |
Girls wait for the perfect guy: disney's fault. guys wait for the perfect girl: playboy's fault. | true |
7 steps to raising stellar, successful, self-sufficient children | false |
Lincoln's ghost has surprising response to donald trump's gettysburg speech | false |
Where to watch nfl abroad: 8 life-saving bars for football fans | false |
Have any of you heard back from d yet? deez nutz haha got em | true |
Where do bee's go to the bathroom? at the bp station. | true |
Dunbar's number: why celebrity train wrecks grab your attention | false |
Those 'moderate' senate republicans are caving fast on obamacare repeal | false |
A-sides with jon chattman: it's free to love singer/songwriter lp | false |
You are the toothpaste to my orange juice. | true |
Carpal tunnel syndrome: who's at risk and how to prevent its disabling effects | false |
Cops: you were driving while intoxicated me: i was in no condition to walk | true |
Kelly osbourne gray hair 'something i've wanted to do my whole life' (video) | false |
What do you call an angry iron man at a skrillex concert? stark raving mad | true |
Broomhilda & django broomhilda never knows when django is in the mood cause the d is silent. | true |
Why did the square divorce the circle? it was sleeping around. | true |
Donald trump jr. tweets about 'julius caesar' after top lawmaker and others shot | false |
What in the world are we going to talk about for two weeks??? | false |
*donates my body to science* science: no thank you | true |
What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis? a woman will blow one every time. | true |
Hank hill works at an s&m sex shop and he sells pro-pain accessories. | true |
What's it called when an arabic author releases their latest novel after dinner? post-hummus | true |
Where do intergalactic keyboards go to drink? space bars | true |
High-tech airport terminals: is mobile boarding the wave of the future? | false |
What do you call a pirate who solves mysteries? a pirate aye! | true |
Tsa terrorist profile: male/female, aged 1 to 112, wearing clothes and traveling in us airports. | true |
I've been nominated for person most likely to not be nominated for anything. | true |
Steve ballmer made a new twitter account, and used it to make a surprising announcement | false |
What does an electric engineer say when they get kicked in the balls? owch! it hertz | true |
Roughly 60% of my childhood was spent trying to do the crane kick after watching karate kid. | true |
Native american students sue the u.s. government over dismal education | false |
Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler? usain bolt can finish a race. edit: grammar | true |
It's great to get laid, it's awesome to get off, but damn it sucks to get laid off. | true |
Lgbt history month icon of the day: john amaechi | false |
Dear human: a desperate plea from your dog | false |
Universe has finite lifespan, higgs boson calculations suggest | false |
What do you get if you take off the red dot on the japanese flag? the french flag! | true |
Emma watson shows how to wear white after labor day | false |
Chuck grassley says senate can't just 'stonewall' clinton's supreme court nominees | false |
Old milk is just like cold milk except you didn't c what you were getting into. | true |
What did little suzy spy with her little eye? a cataract. | true |
Wada recommends banning russian athletes from 2016 rio olympics | false |
The junkie tried but couldn't quit all of his efforts were in vein | true |
Nba let kia ruin the coolest nba dunk ever proposed | false |
The way this woman got back at her cheating boyfriend is just perfect | false |
The coloring book that turns into one stunning panel of wall art | false |
Why was the intelligent heineken upset? 'cus the bud's wiser. | true |
Progressive new laws tackle florida's woeful rape case record and the spread of hiv | false |
6 ways to get on new york's sh*t list | false |
The stylelist blogger network puts a ring on it (photos) | false |
How many volunteers do we have for the army? 384 sir okay round them up 400 sir | true |
Trump is bragging about his latino support in nevada. here’s why numbers aren’t what they seem. | false |
Don't give your heart to someone unless you're 100% certain that you're dead. | true |
Cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice | true |
Family members fight for right to visit ailing relatives | false |
I tried to take a picture of some fog... i mist. ^i'll^see^myself^out^bye! | true |
Melissa mccarthy's hair is the best part of her emmys 2014 look | false |
What did the cannibal have for lunch? baked beings (beans). | true |
Race and the soul of the country -- an open letter to people of faith | false |
It's impossible to look like a bad ass while eating a snow cone. | true |
What's black white and red all over? a police shootout | true |
Attention, guys wearing skinny jeans, you took the phrase getting into her pants the wrong way | true |
Can't believe sting isn't the lead singer of the scorpions | true |
The top 10 items you don't need on your baby registry | false |
Bradley cooper sports pink rollers on movie set (photo) | false |
Huffpost headline quiz: feb. 17 to feb. 27 | false |
Gf (holding 2 identical jackets): which one is yours me: whichever one has a pancake in the pocket | true |
When god eats mushrooms he has delusions of regular. | true |
Something people in walmart have? colds. something people in walmart are missing? ankles. | true |
How to survive the holiday season? book a sitter | false |
What do you get when you mix t and c? angry british people! | true |
What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? the taste! | true |
How twitter bots and sockpuppets used trump's tweets to mess with virginia's governor's race | false |
Diana ross is the ultimate diva in a scarf and hoops (photo) | false |
Good cop: if you confess now, you'll probably just get probation. fad cop: hey macarena! | true |
You will send me nudes this is on reddit. | true |
My wife and i laugh about how competitive we are. but i laugh more. | true |
San francisco radio stations ban lorde's 'royals' until after world series | false |
I bet you vegetarians don't even feel guilty eating baby carrots. barbarians. | true |
Sir, on a scale, how much do you weigh? | true |
Babesiosis: more than 1,100 cases reported in 2011 | false |
Q: what part of the road is always crying? a: the breakdown lane. | true |
Amanda jo stephen, jaywalking suspect, handcuffed and thrown to ground by cops (raw video) | false |
Why did corporate reformers overlook newark's children and families? | false |
Bill maher: don't put al franken in with roy moore, kevin spacey or donald trump | false |
These drag superstars are searching for the world's first drag supermonster | false |
Stop reckless drilling: a new year's resolution for our ocean | false |
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