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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [31/F] with my former fiance [34/M] 7yrs, I'm ending the relationship.
POST: My boyfriend proposed, which I thought I wanted, a few weeks back. I said yes. I flew home to be with friends and a few days into the vacation looked down and realized that I couldn't marry him. I had an epiphany. I told him right away how I felt. I moved out to make him more comfortable.
He's a good guy, but we have been having problems for about 5 years. I've been trying to just make it work, and he got lazy and complacent in the relationship. I just realized that I want to live life and do things, instead of being tied down to someone who is depressed and doesn't like to leave the comfort of home. I wish I realized this years ago, but sadly the ring made me question everything.
We own a home together and 2 pets. He is struggling with my decision. He wants to make it work and is promising me things that I've been asking for years. My rationale is that even if he did "make everything better" eventually we would fall back into the people and habits that we already grew accustomed with. I'm ready to move on, but he's having a hard time.
I've run out of things to say to him, but he keeps wanting more answers. I've asked him for space and he try's, but we end up talking on the phone all the time and he just wants to see me. I'm getting to the point where I feel like I'm starting to get mean, because I've run out of words.
Any advice would help.
TL;DR: | Broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years. I don't know how to make him feel better about the situation. |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: My boss is lying to our customers. Canada
POST: Hey there guys! I have an issue I am hoping to get advice on. Its not a major issue I am just not sure how to deal with it. I am on mobile so please excuse formatting errors.
I work for a company that distributes a well know product. Lately this product has caused an up roar in the media due to the environmental implications of it. We advertise that we recycle this product and a lot of our customers use our services because we recycle it. It costs our company quite a bit of money to recycle it so recently my boss has decided not to.
I told my co worker that that is fraud and if anybody, be it the customers or the corporation, found out there would be hell to pay. I am the one who speaks to all the customers on a regular basis and this has put me in a tough spot. I am being forced to lie to customers and say yes we do recycle this product, when in reality they bring their stuff in and my co worker carries it out back and tosses it in the dumpster.
I am the only one in the office that this bothers and I am not sure what to do. I work in a very small office so if I was to go to anybody higher up it would be no secret.
Hopefully you guys can offer me some advice. Thanks!
TL;DR: | my company advertises and keeps customers due to its recycling program. My boss thinks its too expensive so he just throws the product in the trash. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [33m] How do you know when it's right to express yourself, and when it's not?
POST: As someone who is naturally very inhibited, and with social anxiety, this is the question I often ask myself. I have plenty of regret for things I never said; never expressed in the past. My cowardice has led to lots of missed opportunity, and looking back I think, "If only I had just said what was on my mind."
As an attempt to come out of my shell, I've tried to stop doing that...and in some cases, ended up saying things I regret saying, and burned a few bridges. This is the case with both friendships and attempted relationships.
I feels soo hard to know. They say, "You regret the things you didn't do, not the things you did," but of course that's not the whole truth (I'm sure there are plenty of people in jail who regret the things they did). I'm thinking about sending a message to someone right now, with some thoughts I've had in my head for a while. I really have no idea if it's going to be a 'I'm happy I got it out there, I was so afraid but for no good reason,' or, 'God what an idiot I am for opening my mouth. I've totally ruined that relationship now too.'
You could say, "Only say things that aren't negative or hurtful," but that's not quite right either. Always holding back the negative leads to, 1. Holding on to a big bag of negative. 2. People not respecting you because you don't stand up for yourself when you feel wronged. 3. Not totally sharing yourself and developing really deep relationships where people know who you are.
So, what's the answer? Anyone have a good rule of thumb?
TL;DR: | Regret things I never said. Tried saying things, now I regret the things I said. How do you know when it's a good idea to express yourself? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Am I [22F] expecting too much of my boyfriend [24M] in our long-distance relationship?
POST: My boyfriend and I met in high school and have been dating for 4 years now. Three of these years I've been away at a college three hours away from him. In the past we usually took turns visiting each other every month and also skyping and texting often. But in the last year he has started a new job that is M-F 9-5 and also has classes M-T 7-9pm. So he hasn't been visiting me. At all this school year.
We keep getting into the same argument every other week about how he won't visit me. It upsets me because I'm driving 3 hours every month to see him but he isn't willing to do the same. I feel like I am putting more time and effort into the relationship than he is.
I don't know if I'm overreacting or not. Everything else about the relationship is great and when we are together its all sunshine and butterflies. But there is a small, selfish part of me that wants to say you need to visit or else this relationship isn't going to work...
TL;DR: | My boyfriend of four years never visits me up at college even though I visit him often and I feel hurt that I put more into the relationship than he does. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20 M] broke up with my ex-GF [20 M] 3+ Months ago. Felt a little lonely today!
POST: So my ex-GF left me around 3 months ago (12/May/2015), I was going strong until today. I had been following -
1. No contact
2. Deleted all Photos
3. Deleted all messages and chats
But today, she updated her WhatsApp photo and in that photo she was just staring into the photo and face was very lit up, reminded of her being with me (something triggered inside me).
Felt a little lonely for a moment or so, was able to cope it, but the feeling was not pretty.
She left with a reason "I don't have feelings for you anymore", I took it as problems were between us since last 6-7 months, but I sometimes get screwed over and I want some answers; today is one of those days.
TL;DR: | How can I keep going strong, if my ex-GF left me? I want to move on, but something holds me back at times. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Should I stay or should I go?
POST: I have to go to university out of town next year, as only one university has my program. That being said, I'm really doubting myself on leaving. I love my family so much, I have an amazing relationship with my dad, we have lots of interesting conversations, listen to jazz together, and watch the same movies and tv shows. As well as my wonderful grandparents who care for me. I can't imagine it all leaving next year, I don't think I'll be able to do it. I could stay here for the first year, but my town is a cold shithole, and all my friends would be gone and I'd be miserable, and the university is pretty low quality (education wise it's good, but the quality of students that attend is very low, as their admissions are the bare minimum). If I leave I'll be happy, but away from my family 8 months out of 12 and be miserable then. I'm sorry this is so long I think I just want to talk to somebody, I don't know what to do and I'm really stressing myself out... :(
Should I stay or should I go?
TL;DR: | if I go to school out of town, I'll be miserable away from my family, of I stay in town I will be miserable in this cold shithole, and all my friends gone out of town. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19M] with my GF [15F] of 3 years. Any advice on peer pressure?
POST: *Note that by peer pressure I don't mean friends of either of us. They truly support us.*
I am being pressured by some people to dump her and move on, as if she doesn't have the capability to "love" yet. I've never faultered, but the pressure has been on my mind recently. I have talked to her about it and she feels, just as I do, that it does not really matter what others think.
And then someone says that a 15-y-o should be at home playing with barbies. It really brings her down everytime and it makes me sad too.
Although they were not okay with it at first, my parents support us, as do her parents. We get along really well.
I am a financially stable student with plans to get my own place after finishing my baccalaureate; currently on my second year with excellent scores.
We don't live together, but we meet regularly and often.
Before you ask -- yes, we are intimate in our relationship. We took time to understand the moment of when we feel that we are ready.
If you do try to tell me that this does not feel right to you, then please do not quote or rely on your local laws. I am very well aware of each and every one of them regarding our relationship.
I also understand that in a few years she'll be 18 and suddenly, no one bats an eye anymore.
Please ask for any extra information. Keep in mind that English is not my first language.
*I'd only leave her if it would make her life better, and she is happy with me.
TL;DR: | I'm not really sure on how to react to people who think our relationship is "wrong". Would you consider this relationship an healthy one and why? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I'm a female who tried anal sex for the first time last night. What did I do wrong? How can I do it right?
POST: So, as stated, I'm a female. I'm twenty two years old. This is a throw-away account, of course. My boyfriend and I had been talking about trying anal (I told him I didn't really have any reservations. I have lots of friends who love it, and you can't knock it until you've tried it, right?) He enjoys being penetrated, himself, and I hope to get more than a finger in there in the future, so I thought it would be the perfect bargaining chip if I let him in the backdoor.
Here's the thing: ...I know we used the wrong lube. All we have is that warming KY jelly. I've used this on him, and he had no complaints. But when I tried to lube myself up with the stuff it burned like hell. ....Like...not in a pleasant melty way. Just...fucking....burning. But I continue, because I want to do this, and he's obviously hyped for it. We try for a good long time to get him in (because the lube burned, I didn't bother with much preparatory work...) but it just wasn't taking. Eventually, there's this sort of....silent pop. Like...all of the sudden he's through that first ring of muscle and I'm just like "NOPE NOPE NOPE." and I push him back and out. Then I tell him not to touch me for a bit because I need to have a little cry. It was bad. ...Still can't quite sit comfortably today. That's how bad.
TL;DR: | Used warming KY for lube, didn't do much prep, only got the head in, SEARING PAIN. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Telling her [19F] I like her - yes or no? [18M, never been in a relationship before]
POST: To give a brief background summary:
* Known this girl since 2011
* Friends since probably around the start of '12
* Probably started taking an interest in her later that year
* Decided I'm quite fond of her in the past 1-2 months
* There's a chance she might like me back, I can't be completely certain
* We typically see each other quite a bit in our weekly routines (eg; on trains, at church etc)
* We've been out together a couple of times, although some (or perhaps all) of those instances could be considered "catching up", rather than dating.
* She came out of a rather short-lived relationship around what I **think** might have been early last month. (I'm not sure how long it was, but it was short enough that I didn't even know they were together. She didn't seem too phased by the breakup).
|
Anyway, I went and visited her at her university today and asked if she wanted to get lunch next week, to which she agreed. Now, I've been wondering when (and if) I should make it clear that I do have a keen interest in her. I really would like to get to know her a lot better, and figure that this lunch next week would be a good time to take that step.
That being said, the mid-semester exam period is approaching for university, so things could get a bit hectic with that.
**So, my question is:** Is it appropriate that I convey my feelings? Is it an appropriate time to do so? Would it be better to wait until after mid-semester exams?
Oh, and even if she doesn't reciprocate the same feelings (which wouldn't bother me too much), would it still be worth pursuing her?
TL;DR: | Is it a good idea to convey my feelings to someone ~1 month out of a short relationship, just before mid-semester exams? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: TL;DR; I (19F) have been dating my boyfriend (18M) for almost 3 years and don't know if I should continue
POST: We started dating sophomore year in high school. We go to the same color now (did not pick the same one because of each other). Things have been going great but the only thing that's holding me back is that I'm his first girlfriend. I was his first kiss, first in bed, etc. I have had other relationships before but nothing serious. He was my first in bed too.
My mom keeps telling me that I should play the field more and try new things because I'm a freshman in college. There are no problems in our relationship and I could possibly see marrying him in the distant future. But I don't want to regret not trying new things while in college and experiencing things I wouldn't be able to with my boyfriend. What should I do?
TL;DR: | I (19F) have been dating my boyfriend (18M) for almost 3 years and don't know if I should continue |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Waiting for her [17f] to text me first [17m]: Strategically wise?
POST: So this girl and I have been talking for almost two months, and things have been going great - we have a lot of things in common, we've really hit it off (in-person and through texting), and we've both expressed strong interest through mutual friends. We've also talked about our interest in each other briefly. However, we haven't really defined the relationship. I've never really understood the power game in relationships, so I'm kind of at a loss on this one: is there ever a circumstance that it'd be wise to intentionally wait for her to text first? We usually go back and forth with doing so, but several of my friends recommended that I make her text first, so I can "control the relationship." What do you guys think?
TL;DR: | Things are going pretty well with my crush, but my friends say I need to "take control" - start making her come to me. Some of it sounds valid, but I don't know for sure. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Found out my (23F) boyfriend (23M) lied to me about his last job
POST: My boyfriend and I are supposed to be moving out of state this summer. I have a full time job and would be moving for another job. He has been looking for a job to help pay for expenses, but hasn't had any luck so far.
When we first met, he was working about a half hour from home. He told me he was laid off due to lack of work. I found out this evening from his mom that he actually just stopped going to work. She said they called her one day asking if he was okay. They said he hadn't been to work and wasn't answering his phone. He had also told her that he was laid off, so when she asked him why he lied he said the thruway driving made him anxious. He had worked for that company for a few months.
His mom asked me not to mention this to him. She thought I already knew. How do I approach my boyfriend about this? It has been about 8 months since he'd been "laid off" and I can't just tell him his mom told me because I don't want to lose her trust. I also don't want to move in with someone who doesn't want to hold a job and help with money.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend stopped showing up to work and got fired. His mom told me, thinking I already knew. I have to move in with him, out of state, in a few months. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [20/F] My boyfriend [20/M] had his heart broken before we were dating, but is still friends with her. Help?
POST: During the previous year, this girl strung my now boyfriend along for quite the ride. He did everything he could to make her happy, including doing everything he could to fix her relationship with the guy she ditched him for. I also know that before she started dating someone else, they were super close and I don't know how far things went. Her rejection practically destroyed him and as his friend at the time it really hurt to see him going through something I've had plenty of experience with.
Fast forward a few months, we start dating. He admitted to not being completely over her and since I was just coming out of a particularly unhealthy relationship, I was cool with it. However, once we actually started to go to functions as a couple,I started to see just what I was dealing with. As soon as she and her boyfriend would show up, I would get ditched in a corner while he talked almost exclusively to her. I would try to involve myself in the conversations, but she would almost immediately shut me out. A few times, I left to go to the restroom only to come back to him hugging her. I talked to him about it and how that made me feel and, instead of changing his behavior, we stopped going to parties.
Now we've been dating for almost three months and he's told me that he loves me and I really believe him and I love him back. But I can't even go on Facebook without seeing comments he's made on her posts *while* we were hanging out and he's almost always texting her. I'm trying to not let it bother me, but I've dated enough emotionally abusive assholes that I can't help but feel nervous about this. I want to ask him if he's still hung upon her, but I don't want to cast doubt on our relationship so early.
TL;DR: | My boyfriend might still have feelings for the girl who broke his heart and I'm not sure how to cope with that. |
SUBREDDIT: r/college
TITLE: Did bad in a course due to depression need advice.
POST: So The story is I've been struggling with depression for sometime now. I managed to maintain a 3.0 for the first year and a half but this past semester my depressions become somewhat debilitating. I was unable to complete a calculus 2 summer course because of it and received a withdrawl grade. Having retook that course this semester i only got a D in calc 2 along with a failing bio 1 grade. I really know I would have passed both these courses had it not been for my being depressed. Ive been seeing a therapist and two months before the semester ended he decided to put me on depression meds because i wasn't getting better without them. Now i notice I'm getting better but it wasn't until the end of this semester which is not shot to shit. Im really a smart kid but This depression got to me I'm sad to say. I really wanna finish up math because Ive always wanted a science degree in chemistry or physics or something but I don't know if it would even be worth it since I did bad in calc 2 now. Even if i retook it its not like my depression is an explanation for why I did bad, so would they even take me seriously if i tried to get my degree having done bad in the course. I really don't want to let this depression beat me like this but I'm just not sure what to do anymore. Any advice on if I should continue to take calculus and pursue my science degree?
edit
TL;DR: | Been depressed did bad in calc 2 twice( w grade and d) on meds now feeling better but not sure if i took the course again would my degree matter. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [18F] Unsure of home situation with Mum [52F].
POST: I just graduated high school a few weeks ago and am planning to move out early next year.
For the past few months my mum has gradually tried to make me more independent (always rather than usually doing my own washing, buying my own clothes, which I'm generally fine with) but is also making me feel a bit left out of the family. I'm often out of the loop with plans, and sometimes they (brother [16], mum and stepfather) leave me at home while they go out for dinner.
When she came back from a two week trip recently the first thing she did was criticise me and ask about work, despite my brother and I spending hours cleaning, decorating and making lunch for her return. This also creates a lot of rivalry with my brother, who often brags about being the favourite 'better child'.
I am looking for job at the moment, but my mum gets really frustrated that I don't have one yet and makes a big show of bringing it up every day, meanwhile giving my brother lots of money to go out. Tonight she suggested that I start helping pay for food and maybe rent, which I think is a bit unfair since she's still getting child support for me from my dad.
I guess I'm just wondering how to handle the situation. Everything is happening really fast and I haven't really processed leaving high school yet. I've struggled with depression in the past two years, and the feeling of not being wanted in my family anymore is really weighing on me. Any attempts to talk to my mum have been shot down. I feel like she doesn't understand how expensive moving out is, together with uni fees (she moved out at 22 and uni for her was free), and that her constantly pressuring me to get a job and leave sort of hurts.
TL;DR: | Mum increasingly frustrated with lack of job, slowness with moving out after end of high school exams four weeks ago. Feel left out of family. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Breast cancer survivors, my girlfriend needs to have an ultrasound today for a lump she's had for a couple of months. Please show me some wisdom.
POST: Reddit, my girlfriend and I had noticed a lump in her left breast for about a month or two now. She recently had a physical and was advised she get an ultrasound. The doctor thinks it could be hormonal or a cyst. So she's due for an ultrasound this morning.
My girlfriend's mother's side of the family has had history of breast cancer, her grandmother passed away from it a couple years ago.
She is 21, doing wonderful things, we work together on various projects and actually have a huge production going on this evening, but we both can't seem to think straight.
I lend you my ears, give me some advice my friends.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend of 6 years may be showing early signs of breast cancer, I, the boyfriend, am tripping bawls. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: Reddit, a marine turned civilian needs a little of your mob mantality activism to help him continue with college.
POST: Reddit and Marine Corps Family and Friends - I need your help. A 6 time combat veteran that I know (SSgt) recently transitioned from the Marine Corps to civilian life. He is using his GI Bill to get a college degree from UNC-Wilmington. Due to an administrative error on the college's part, this former Marine was charged out of state tuition, even though he has lived in North Carolina for the past 8 years, and has been a home-owning tax payer for the past 3 years. It wasn't until he received his bill from the VA this week that he realized he was being charged out of state tuition. He currently owes 7,000 beyond what the GI Bill is authorized to pay per semester in NC. This former Marine has already taken on a part-time job as a gas station attendant at 7.75/hr to help cover his bill. He has contacted everyone in the school to get it fixed, but at this point they are telling him that "Their policy is firm and they are not able to budge to assist him. He should contact the VA immediately to find a loan to pay for his semester's tuition and file again for instate tuition so it isn't charged next semester" Now this former Marine, a combat decorated Hero from Iraq and Afghanistan, is on the brink of selling his house and dropping out of school to work full time and pay back the 7,000 he owes the school at this point. I do not know what there is to do, but this isn't right. This is 2012 - you can change a student's tuition with the click of a mouse and make it instate, which will be fully paid for under the GI Bill. Dropping out of school will also take away the monthly income he receives as part of the GI Bill and set him back even farther. 6 degrees of separation says someone on here will read this and knows a senator, congressmen, etc that can do something. Reddit is good at helping worthy causes, and all it should take is some emails and/or facebook messages. I fully intend to call NC and Iowa's Senator tomorrow in the hopes that this helps this former Marine. If you have any ideas - I am all ears. Thank you for reading this.
TL;DR: | Ex-marine lives in state, clerical error gets him out of state tuition, is about to cause him to drop out. Needs help via emails or facebook. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Mom has 0 work experience, what can she do to prepare for a job in the next couple of years?
POST: Dear reddit,
My dad recently divorced mom. That in itself isn't so bad, but the problem is that my mom has been a homemaker (basically jobless) for the past 25 years. She's been entirely reliant on my dad for income and doesn't have any work experience nor a college degree. Not only that but our family immigrated to America from Korea and she can't really speak English fluently.
I'm definitely willing to support her, but I'm currently in college and won't be graduating for a couple of years. Fortunately, she has some money saved up and got the house, so she's in no immediate financial trouble. What are her options? I'm strongly in favor of her getting some sort of job training, but the only thing I can think of is her doing a 2 year program in accounting and doing some sort of accounting job.
Do you guys have any other ideas on what she can do? Something along the vein of her getting out, interacting with other people (to improve her english) and ending up with some ability to get a job. She's in her late 40s so nothing too physically strenuous.
TL;DR: | newly divorced mom has 0 work experience, what are some 2 year degrees/job training programs that she could do to get a job? |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: I've been offered a job but i'm now sure if i should hand my notice in yet...
POST: Right, so i work in a bakery with an absolutely horrid boss. shoe shouts and screams and throws cakes around like a toddler not getting their own way. And i've been looking for a job for months. on Friday i had a n interview for an admin position that i feel i can start a career with. I got an E-mail from the company today saying that the manager is out of the office till next Wednesday and will write me up a formal offer when he's back, and that they look forward to my arrival and addition to the company.
Now, i don't want to wait any longer than i have to to leave the bakery, but my friend is telling me to wait until i have the formal offer in the bag as then i know what i'm dealing with. I have to give 2 weeks notice, so if i hand it in today i can be gone by start of October, if i wait, in the middle of one of our busiest times at the bakery therefor my boss getting even more angry and screamtastic with me.
Do i hand it in tomorrow or wait till the formal offer?
TL;DR: | i have an offer for a job and i'm not sure if i should hand my notice in today or when i have the formal offer. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [20F] friend [20M] disapproves of and wants to rescue me from my relationship with my boyfriend [28M]
POST: About a month ago, I started dating my boyfriend, Nate, whom I met through a video game. We had been flirting and talking over skype for a year and a half, and I had met him in person a few times. After the most recent time he visited, we decided that the chemistry between us was too much to ignore, and began a relationship. We kept it quiet for about a month, but decided to tell our friends when he flew back out here this past weekend to visit. Most of my friends, including my ex boyfriend (with whom I am still very good friends) are very happy for me. Most of them love him and think he's an amazing person, others are neutral but are happy that I'm happy.
However, my friend Dan is quite opposed to this development. He hasn't met Nate in person, but the three of us will party up and play video games together. Before now, Dan has been friendly enough with Nate. After Nate and I announced our relationship, Dan's girlfriend, Annie–my best friend–let me know that he didn't like the situation, was suspicious, and wanted to "rescue me". Luckily, my best friend told him to butt out. So far he has, but I'm afraid of this creating a rift in our group of friends, and also becoming a point of contention in their relationship (Annie is happy for me, though she has no strong feelings one way or the other on Nate).
Dan has been my friend for a couple years, and I don't want this to affect our friendship or the group as a whole, but I'm afraid he'll take "butt out" as "ignore completely." How should I handle this? Should I even do anything?
TL;DR: | One of my friends disapproves of my relationship and I'm afraid it will cause tension and drama in our group of friends. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I think, therefore, I am... In love with you.
POST: Been seeing a guy for some time now. It has progressively gotten more towards dating and being monogamous, which has been going great but I can't help but feel that he doesn't care for me like I do for him. I always hear the sayings that the person who cares the least has the most power and that if you have to ask then there is your answer **BUT** this has been bugging me for some time. He keeps making promises about the future and I love that he does that but I get the feeling he might be the type to plan things that may never come about. We have expressed that we both really like each other which is nice to hear but I am not feeling like he means it. I am the romantic *(sometimes lovey-dovey)* type and he is NOT - which bugs me as well, since I know my love language will never be fulfilled if we ever get serious. I can't stop thinking about him and I **REALLY** like him - I am talking about being in love here (as least as much as I can be at this point in time)!! Without venting too much more - should I just stop being a girl, forget about it, and just take one day at a time **OR** should I talk with him about it **OR** should I just walk away? Some outside perspective would be nice.
TL;DR: | Been *seeing* a guy I really like - things seem to be going really well but I don't think he feels the same about me as I do him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24/F] with my Boyfriend[26/M] for 2 years, I'm not invited to 2 family-related weddings
POST: My bf(m/26) and I (f/24) have been dating for 2 years. In November he is invited to a wedding of a family friend and I'm not invited. He is going with his family. This hurts my feelings a little. I don't even know these people, they are his mom's friends. So I don't really want to go but I also feel hurt to be excluded. I recently also found out that he is attending the wedding for his mom's cousin early September. They are all going as a family.
I don't exactly want to go since I don't even know these people; my boyfriend himself doesn't know these people well. It just seems weird that he is attending them alone with his family.
Am I being silly?
Am I wrong to feel this way?
TL;DR: | I(F/24) am not invited to 2 family-related weddings that my boyfriend (M/26) is attending this fall.Should I be hurt? |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I [M18] can't be sure if she [F18] likes me
POST: I'm at university (UK) and we've known each other about a week (is it too soon to know?). We have lots in common.
We hit it off pretty quickly. For me, our conversations are better than with any other girl I know, but I can't tell if that's because
a) we're becoming good friends, or
b) because she has a crush on me, or
c) because we have lots in common and she's a good conversationalist.
I wish it were as simple as looking for signs of flirting and affection. But I'm terrible at spotting these things, and I'm only just overcoming problems with keeping eye contact, so I'm too focused on that to notice anything else. And I'm not 100% sure I'm conveying obvious signals/flirting.
We're arranging to go out together this week, to visit some places in town we want to check out. It's not obvious if it's a date, but I suppose I'll have to wait and see how it goes.
This weekend I'm away from uni, and we're not texting often, which I think is because we're both very busy. But I can't tell if I'm being too pushy.
Thanks if you've got this far. So is it too early to tell? I'm prepared to ask her if she has mutual feelings, but would it be too early? Are there better ways to gauge interest? Thank you for any help!!
TL;DR: | Both 18. Girl at uni. Unclear signals. How can I tell if good friends or she's interested? Is it too soon to know? Is a trip into town seen as a date? |
SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: Don't misspell my name!
POST: I'm in a poetry class in my college (vomit). We have to critique people's poems, and write out a reply to them, and then submit them.
Here's how it works. We print out our poems, with our names on it (this is important), and pass them out. Then they write on the poetry, write out a reply, and publish it to our dropbox folders. My dropbox folder in that class is titled with my name (again, important). Then they have to start the critique with "To Miss AliceJotunheim..." (IMPORTANT). I went first, and turned in my poems. By the next week, I had all the people's replies in my dropbox. And yet, a few people had managed to misspell my name. My name is a simple one, like Alice, and while it can be commonly misspelt... There were ten thousand different ways for them to find my name to spell the frickin' thing right. And they didn't. I was furious, because it was so obvious they just weren't paying attention.
My petty revenge? Well, I went first. So I wrote down everyone's names, and marked the people who'd misspelt mine. Now, when I have to critique their poems, I misspell their names. It might not make a huge difference, and they might not even know, but it makes me feel sooooo good.
TL;DR: | misspell my easy frickin' name, despite all the places it's stated, and I'll do the same thing to you! |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I could use some advice before I do anything else.
POST: Here's how it is: I (m16) like a girl at my school (f16)... Background: I met her this year in class, we kinda became instant friends cuz she was new friends with my gf at the time. Well me and the gf broke up but left off on really good terms. So now is about the time when I start liking the new girl.
So I asked her out, and she said she would think about it. It seemed like all was going to end well, but in the end she said she just wanted to stay friends. Thing is now I don't really think she was being sincere. She might have been sincere, but her body language was not speaking unanimously.
I don't know if she's just telling the inconvenient truth, or being loyal to my ex, or what. But I want to go out with her. So badly.
So anyway back to the story, she said no, and after not really thinking about it, I messaged her on Facebook saying that "should you (hopefully) change your mind, the offer still stands. Or just tell me to drop it, and it shall be dropped," (Actual quote) to which she didn't reply.
How can I try to get her to reconsider without seeming creepy or desperate?
TL;DR: | asked out my crush (who's also my ex's friend) and she said no. I'm not done trying to win her over. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Have you ever been to see a psychic? Any interesting stories from the experience?
POST: I always thought they were a big crock of bull shit. But my friend who is living in a different country just rang me after she went to a psychic and this weird psychic-bitch spent about 10 minutes talking about ME. She knew really specific details about me that even my friend hadn't known such as my newly acquired habit of consuming not-so-legal narcotics, my daddy issues etc. Also, ONLY last night I realised that I hate my life and that I need to get out of this place and move/travel somewhere new.. SHE KNEW THIS. She also said that "I needed to do this or else my life will be shit and I might die soon". I assume that was my friend paraphrasing and the actual psychic sounded more mystical and shit. So I'm pretty freaked out.
So does anyone have any cool/freaky/scary/interesting/sexual/life-changing/eye-opening stories from a visit with an alleged psychic?
TL;DR: | Friend saw psychic. Psychic-bitch wouldn't shut up about me, knew everything about my life. I might die, etc. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22 M] found messages from another guy on facebook of my [21F] girlfriend of almost 1 year
POST: Well last night I was helping my gf with one of her homework assignments and I had her laptop. The night got late and she went to go shower and that's when I sneaked on to her facebook. I know that is a very low move, but she has been acting weird ever since she came back from the summer where she lives in Mexico. She is Latin American.
Anyway I found what I was looking for and from the guy I was expecting it from. All the messages were in Spanish so I didn't really understand what they were about, but there were a whole bunch of kiss faces, smiley faces exchanged. A lot! Yet again I don't want to assume she cheated on me, but I cannot except her being all flirty like that with another guy, whether he is gay or not.
I have an assumption he might be gay by the profile stalking I did, or he just has a very big ego and posts half naked pictures of himself every five minutes, but that doesn't justify it. I need to know if I should approach her and how I should bring this up to her without overreacting or getting angry.
TL;DR: | Found flirty messages to my gf from another guy and need to approach her about it. how do I do it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: My mother in law (to be) insulted my preference for cheaper cars..
POST: My MIL (to be) is VERY materialistic. She's a real estate agent and, of course, has to have the latest BMW or Mercedes (for her and her real estate husband). Overall she likes me, but the kind of "jokes" she makes are really starting to get under my skin.
My mom and dad are hard working people who, although well off in some aspects, don't splurge on expensive cars. Ever. For as long as I can remember, Dad drove a Toyota and mom drove a nice, new Nissan. We love Japanese cars. So in the search for a new car, my father brought up different makes and models but we settled on a Japanese car (Honda or Toyota or Nissan).
My MIL knows about my search and asked what I decided. I told her maybe a Honda. She flipped out and exclaimed "ughhhhh ewww Honda!?!? That's for poor people, make sure you DONT park in my lot and park where people can't see you!"
Of course, everyone laughs (my bf, his dad and sister). The catch : both of her children have NISSANS. WHICH SHE BOUGHT. Anyway, I was really annoyed and didn't bite back, just calmly told her those are reliable Japanese cars. But because she is so "high class" (her own words) she continued laughing away.
I'm really disgusted at this kind of behavior and, frankly, embarrassed. Even if I could buy a BMW, why would I at my age? Its too expensive to maintain. She's 50, I'm 22...
I feel really bad about what she said and wonder if I'm being too sensitive? I told my bf and he was completely not bothered by it because that's "my mom, that's just how she is. To her, " cheap cars" are unacceptable."
The way she reacted was as if I brought a 1995 piece of crap car from the junk yard...
This is the type of woman that plasters herself in MK, Tiffany, LV, Prada and all sorts of dazzling brands. God forbid I don't have the latest Coach purse...
Please tell me I'm not crazy :(
TL;DR: | mother in law exclaimed disgust at Japanese cars, saying they're for poor people and that I shouldn't park in the same lot as her BMW and Mercedes. catch: her children both have Nissans that she bought. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How do I tell people to stfu politely?
POST: My college library has group study floors, silent floors as well as group study rooms you can book. On the silent floors there is supposed to be a zero-tolerance policy towards whispering, phone buzzing and the like. Lately I've noticed this particular group of students on the silent floor causing a distraction. They barely try to whisper and carry on hour-long conversations between then (4-5 ppl)-- I have heard them do this on several occasions. I, along with a lot of other people choose the silent floors for the very fact that they're supposed to be absolutely quiet. What do you think about me going up to them and suggesting they move to a floor that allows talking or to book a group work room? I don't want to be a huge dick about this.
TL;DR: | people constantly talking on silent floors in library. i want to tell them to move to a floor where they are allowed to talk because i find their interactions distracting. what's a way i can go about this without being rude? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Cannot interpret old friend [M22]'s texts. Making boyfriend [M22] uncomfortable.
POST: Me and my friend have been close friends since high school. Lately, we haven't been talking. The last time we hung out was about four months ago, mostly because of college. The last time we talked was around then too.
Recently he texted me, started off with how he recently broke up with his girlfriend. I've helped him out with his relationship issues for a long while (like over the last year and a half), so I talked it through with him for a little. We have talked a significant amount about his problems with this girl in the past.
Today, he sent me a texts along the lines of "I still listen to that old mix tape you made me, you should know it still comforts me." And my boyfriend said this text made him feel uncomfortable.
My boyfriend of two years also said that he feels as though my friend has some sort of "emotional dependency" on me because of how he talks to me about his relationship problems, etc. And how, we hadn't talked for a long time, but as soon as he broke up with his girlfriend he started texting me again. That when he no longer gets attention from his girlfriend, he texts me for attention or something like that.
I'm not sure how to interpret my boyfriend's logic on this. I thought I was just helping a friend, and I've said that. He said, even if that is so, it makes him feel uneasy. If it makes him uncomfortable, obviously I will act in a way that will no longer make him uncomfortable.
**I just want to know if this relationship with my friend and these texts sound like something that would make a significant other uncomfortable,** and if his reasoning is universal. My boyfriend didn't explain why this text made him feel uncomfortable. I can't really tell why this is making him feel uneasy, wondering for other opinions.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend is uncomfortable with the nature of my relationship with a close friend from high school. can't tell if his reasoning is logical, or if he's being over-dramatic |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (18f) jealousy is becoming a huge problem between me and my boyfriend (20m) of 16 months
POST: My boyfriend and I have been together for nearly 18 months and things are great. We hang out a lot and are pretty much best friends, but I get so so so jealous at the smallest things. I'm absolutely terrified that he will leave me for someone else and that has caused me act a bit crazy. I always think that he's looking at other girls or having very lustful thoughts about them. It's caused many arguments between us and he gets very angry about it. It makes me feel quite depressed, and I feel like I'm starting to annoy him a lot of the time. He is a great boyfriend, he calls me beautiful everyday and cares for me a lot.
The jealousy I feel is very intense. He was texting a girl the other day, and I asked who he was talking to, but he became very blunt about it because he knows how jealous and crazy I can get. I literally started shaking because I felt so threatened by this girl...
I have never had this problem before with previous boyfriends.
I don't really have a lot of friends so I don't know who to talk to about it. I feel quite alone and helpless. Is there anything I can do to stop having these intense feelings of jealousy or even control it?
TL;DR: | I (18f) get very intense feelings of jealousy and it's caused countless arguments between me and my boyfriend (20m). I need advice on how to control it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: I know you all know this, but running shoes are important!
POST: First things first, Im a 21yo male and here are the [shoes] The ones on bottom are my old ones, and the others are my new ones.
I've been running informally for about 4 months, on and off, and the more I ran the more often I ran. I have this awful pair of shoes I run in, just some dressy shoes I'd bought like 5 years ago, but since I wasnt taking running too seriously, I didn't want to invest in nice shoes. Eventually I was running every morning for just under 2 miles and suddenly I started getting pain in my shins, so that I could only run every 4 days, and decided it was time to get some nice running shoes.
I went to a running shoe store, and the fabulous guy recommended shoes with more support for my feet based on how he saw I walked. He seemed very experienced and savvy and after trying out a few pairs I walked out with some new shoes. I was very excited to try them out but couldnt because it was raining. The day I happened be going up to my dad's cabin up north and I figured running the trails up there would be the perfect chance to test out my new shoes.
My dad's friend would also be up there with us, and since he had been running for quite a while I convinced him to go with me. We started off on the beautiful trails and it felt I was running on air compared to my old shoes. He had a nifty watch with GPS and was tracking how far we were going. Since I was feeling so great running, I let him decide how far to go. My shins felt hunky dory and the only pain I got was a bit in my ankle. By the time we got back I could barely keep up with him, and was completely exhausted. He told me that we ended up running 5K in 31mins.
TL;DR: | I was running less than 2 miles a day, but after buying a new pair of shoes I ran over 3 miles in 31mins. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by Calling my Best Friend a "Street Rat"
POST: A little Background first :
I grew up in a very good environment and my family has always been fairly well off in the financial area. Which these day simply equates to middle class. I'm well aware of this and try to be as humble as I can. Sometimes however I forget the woes of others. I'd also like to add that me and my friends get pretty dark with our jokes. For instance, we love Cards Against Humanity. Anyways on to the incident.
The incident:
Yeah, I made a huge mistake when hanging out with one of my best friends one night not to long ago. I made a comment about going on dates with girls who lived in trailer parks and made the Aladdin analogy, saying I was the prince and they were the "street rats", joking of course. He said he grew up in a trailer park, something I had either forgot or never really learned.....to lighten the mood and try to save myself I said I love street rats and that He was my favorite street rat.......
TL;DR: | Dated some trailer park girls, Made bad Aladdin analogy, Called my very good friend who grew up in a trailer park a "Street Rat". |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by talking on the phone while ordering Potbelly
POST: This happened about 15 minutes ago.
I was really stressed out because I was notified earlier this morning that I had to bring something to an info session that I had left at my apartment. I work downtown and take public transportation to my job. So, I had to travel all the way back to my apartment and then back down to my info session. Halfway down, I knew I wasn't going to make it on time. So I got off the train and headed back to my apartment. I figured I would reschedule the session. Out of annoyance, anger, or stress, I called my friend and started venting. I decided to get a Potbelly sub (and might as well chips and shake) because I was not in the mood to cook. Everything was going fine and I was still talking to my friend who could vaguely make out the various restaurant noises that go on inside a Potbelly. I usually don't talk on the phone when interacting with others but today I more stressed than usual. As I was checking out, I reminded the cashier that I also got a shake. The cashier told me the total and I handed her my card. Meanwhile on the phone my friend says "Jeez, you're still getting your food? How long does it take?" Without even thinking I just shouted "Fucking Long!" I looked up to see the cashier staring at me really confused and scared. I quickly apologized, repeating that I am on the phone and didn't mean to say that to her while my friend on the line is cracking up! She quickly finished the transaction and stuttered "I'll make that shake right away!" I felt so bad! She even gave me extra mini cookies on top of the lid to make up for it.
TL;DR: | Swore at a Potbelly cashier by accident while talking on the phone with a friend. Got extra cookies because of it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (23F) SO (25M) is leaving to return to his home country
POST: Hi guys, to be honest, I know LDRs don't work but I'm just so lost on how to proceed.
I met this guy on OKC roughly 6 months ago and we hit it off immediately. We've met each other's friends, we tell each other our deepest secrets and ask and talk about our futures. However, he disclosed to me early on that he would be leaving the country in early March so our relationship had an expiry date. I never thought I would connect with someone on so many different levels, especially with the amount of failed relationships I've had in my past so I agreed immediately to the arrangement.
Since then, although it's only been 6 months, we've grown together. He shifted his leaving date to the end of May for both work and the chance to spend my birthday with me and take me to another country for a holiday. Recently, we've also moved in together and he's been wonderful, putting in the effort to make the place we have into "our home," as he put it. He's just become such a permanent and constant fixture in my life that the looming date of his departure is killing me. He constantly talks about how great his country is and is always encouraging me to visit but that could be years from now.
I'm just so confused about my feelings and I'm trying to distance myself but when you spend every day together and you live together, it's just so difficult to decide what's right.
I guess what I'm trying to ask is, how do I get over his departure when he leaves and is there a reason to maintain contact with him after he leaves in hopes for a relationship in the future?
TL;DR: | met a guy I connected with perfectly but he's leaving to a country far away. How do I deal with it and should I maintain contact? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Dogtraining
TITLE: Fearful GSD and I'm not sure how to know which advice to take
POST: My rescue GSD came from what was described to us as a "dog hoarding" situation. She is wonderful with us but nervous around other people and dogs, especially when they approach her (vs her approaching them in her own time.) She has been to a professional trainer, who recommended training commands to build her confidence (sit, down, stay, come, etc.) We have done that but no real change.
I have read infinite websites and books but they all conflict! I see on the posting guidelines for this sub that you guys do not believe in the dominance theory. But that is what our trainer taught us! And he was highly certified. I'm not saying he was right or wrong, only that I have no idea who to believe. I've also read a Cesar Millan book, and again, I'm not saying he is right or wrong - I know that some people here also do not agree with him. (Please understand I am not advocating any of this, I am only saying that there are many theories available which is confusing and overwhelming.)
TL;DR: | I would like to be the best dog owner that I can be and help my GSD overcome her fears. I'm unsure how to do this and how to decide which method is best. Advice, please? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [16M] am having a problem being independent and relying on my Girlfriend [16F] for happiness.
POST: I'll start off by saying that most of the time I consider myself a happy, healthy, normal teenage boy. I have been dating my current girlfriend for over a year now. We are very much in love and we have a very happy and healthy relationship all around.
We do not attend school together, I moved schools and haven't made too many friends yet. She lives about twenty minutes away and I do not have a car or license yet. This has not really been a problem because we spend the day together probably around every other week or so.
However, the problem I have been having is that I find myself being more attached to her. I find myself getting upset when she takes awhile to respond from text messages and such. I feel like I have nothing better to do. I know that this is because I only have her to talk to, because I recently switched schools.
My question is, what can I do to be more independent and do my own thing instead of bothering my girlfriend for attention?
TL;DR: | What can I do to be more independent and "do my own thing" as opposed to overthinking and bothering my girlfriend with text messages? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27 F] upset at my husband's [36 M] long time friend [30s F] for not being honest about her photography skill level before agreeing to let her shoot our wedding for free for "experience."
POST: We originally were just going to go to the courthouse. My grandma convinced me to have a party afterwards, so we through essentially a BBQ in our backyard, about 40-50 people. My uncle has done wedding photography for years and ended up taking a handful of pictures that day, which will be the only ones that will be displayed in our home.
Friend of husband's is a massage therapist, but has been trying to get a side photography business started. I had seen some of her pictures on Facebook and honestly, wasn't impressed, but wrote it off as it wasn't my style (lots of pictures of women in lingerie, 50s pin up girl stuff, etc). She offers to shoot the wedding for free in exchange for being able to use our pictures as sort of promotional material. Husband can't resist free. I'm skeptical, but agree.
Day of wedding, she provides absolutely no direction and takes forever, doing endless combinations of us plus family members. I end up missing most of the party posing for pictures. But hey I figured some would turn out and it's better than having no pictures.
Wrong. The pictures are so bad. Like any of my cousins could have done a better job with the iPhone camera bad. So I missed 80% of my wedding for nothing. And the only pictures we will keep were taken my uncle in about 5 minutes.
I'm not crazy about the pictures being used online, but we had a verbal agreement that I feel compelled to honor because that's my character, and husband has been friends with her since high school.
I feel betrayed, misled, and sad over the loss of the pictures I thought we would have. We normally go to this girl for massages, and she is a gifted massage therapist. She invited us for her big BBQ Tuesday and I don't want to go. I feel like I need some time so i don't hurt her feelings saying something I might regret.
TL;DR: | husband's friend misled me about her photography experience in order to shoot our wedding to use the pictures to promote herself and ended up taking horrible pictures. Not sure where to go from here. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [28 M] with my GF [26 F] am worried about risking a malnourished relationship with my GF of 2 weeks due to a month long work trip
POST: Just over a month ago I met a woman I really like. We usually speak for at least 2 hours a day and we see each other whenever we can. Although we've never made it "official", I think it's safe to say we crossed that boundary a couple of weeks ago.
So far she seems like the ying to my yang. We're both Intelligent (I actually rarely admit I am), but our interests oppose. I'm the logical, scientific kind and she's the creative, free spirit kind.
A scientist and an artist don't sound like a couple who should get on really well, but we do.
However, as fate would have it, I'm leaving to work at another faculty for a month in another country in a few days. I'm worried about whether spending so much time apart so early on is going to be detrimental to our relationship. We're still exploring each other as people and I worry that if this doesn't happen now, then it could lead to problems further down the line.
I guess what I'm saying is that the relationship could start off malnourished.
Does anybody else have any advice or experience they would be willing to share?
TL;DR: | I am worried about starting off a potentially malnourished relationship with my girlfriend of 2 weeks due to a month long work trip I'm about to go on in a few days. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Hey Reddit, how do YOU hook up with a girl at a party?
POST: So a buddy of mine is having a party at his condo, and a girl that I DEFINITELY want to take upstairs is going to be attending. I am pretty decent looking, and we have flirted around before, so I think that I have a fairly good chance.
However, this is my first party... How can I hook up with this chick? We will all be drinking and having a good time, and I guess I should just casually flirt around with her and hope for more?
So what do you recommend? Ask her to dance? Pour her a drink and ask if we can go talk? I will probably be able to read her reactions pretty easily, but shit, this is my first time and I want it to work out!
TL;DR: | I want to hook up with a girl at a party. What should I do to make this happen? What signs am I looking for? Alcohol will be involved. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Got to have a catheter ablation on friday.
POST: What can i expect to feel during the procedure, what are your experiences? Feeling very apprehensive :(
TL;DR: | Had WPW Syndrome - Got it fixed by catheter ablation, now have migraines after op hope they are temporary. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Dear reddit, I could use some armchair legal advice to clear my mind until I talk to my lawyer monday
POST: Here is the situation. I was recently pulled over and arrested for driving with a suspended license for an unpaid ticket that was neglected for ages.
My parents paid a bondsman to bail me out (700 something on a 7000 bail).
My public defender got me a good deal -- a full deferral, just sign some papers and pay some fees.
I mailed in the paperwork & money order, and thought everything was gravy.
Fast forward about a month, and I get a message from my lawyer saying there is a warrant issued, because they never received the paperwork/money. I verified the money order wasn't cashed, and am working on a refund.
I just left my lawyer a message, asking how to proceed. I am sure I wont hear back until Monday.
What I am really afraid of is how this will affect my parents. My dad just lost his job, and I am afraid they will use this as a means to claim they owe the whole $7000. **Is this a real possibility, or will they just end up forfeiting the $700?**
I'm really hoping this turns out ok for me, and I'm ready to turn myself in if necessary. I just can't believe this happened, I feel like such a failure right now. My parents are the best, and I am so worried about this I feel like I am going to throw up.
TL;DR: | got arrrested, bailed out, and an awesome deal. Due to an undelivered piece of mail I have a warrant, and am afraid my parents are going to be out a lot of money. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU By playing with electricity (Slightly NSFW-ish maybe?)
POST: So I have been messing around with a ~1000 watt
TL;DR: | I was making things very hot using electricity and stupidly decided to grab them while they were still probably hundreds of degrees celsius |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22 M] recently became more emotionally open to my [21 F] girlfriend.
POST: Recently after some traumatic events (which I won't discuss here) happened I have become very insecure and emotional. This insecurity has caused me to have a couple breakdowns and open up to my girlfriend on a more emotional level.
I laid my emotions bare to my girlfriend and she supported me and helped me over come some of my issues.
The problem arises when I found out she was complaining to her friends about my insecurities and breakdowns. She has talked to them about breaking up with me and talking about how I am driving her up a wall with my emotions.
She doesn't know that her friends have talked to me about all this. I am unsure where to go from here. Do I lock up my emotions and hide my break downs? Do I confront her? Do I leave? Do I let her leave?
TL;DR: | Recently had emotional breakdowns and opened up to my girlfriend. She has talked to her friends about breaking up with me! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My boyfriend [27M] is guilt tripping me (24F) into not getting a tattoo.
POST: I have been dating Joe (not real name) for 3 months. Brand new relationship, however I have fallen deeply in love with him and things are generally great. We are very physically attracted to each other. I have one tattoo that I got when I was 18 and I haven't gotten one since. My father passed away some time ago and I have finally worked up the courage to get a memorative tattoo, which I have been thinking of ever since he died. My boyfriend, however, doesn't like tattoos and has made that very clear when I made the appointment one afternoon without discussing it with him first.
I love this guy, very much. He is good to me in all other aspects of our relationship. The day of my appointment is creeping up and he has been relentlessly trying to change my mind about it, and I have gotten to the point where I am just so exasperated of him trying to guilt trip me out of it, that I just want to not get my tattoo now because I am so tired of arguing about it and trying to get him to support me and respect my decisions about my own body.
My internal battle is that, I consider myself a very independent lady and I dislike being controlled or told what to do. The fact that he is doing this is killing me! I just don't know where the line is between respecting our relationship and being able to do what I want. I'll also throw in that this will not be my last tattoo, as I have long dreamed of having half-sleeves.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend hates tattoos and has been relentlessly trying to guilt trip me out of it. I don't know what to do because it is something I want very much but yet I love him and want to respect our relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I am thinking of going to school online for the last two years of high school.. anyone have a personal experience that can change my mind to do it or don't do it?
POST: I have a lot of friends, but not many close friends, I get straight a's, I play football, but my school is a shit hole. Everyone from different towns says it is the worst school they know of in the area. I hate it and I always get in trouble for calling the teachers out. They honestly don't give a flying hoot what they are teaching. My Western Civ teacher even teaches the material wrong. My town has down voted a new school twice and has also said no to having us go to school with another town with a great school. I believe that if I go to school online I have a better chance of succeeding in life. I think it would hinder my social life for the next two years though. I am depressed during the school year because I am stressed all the time. I have been suspended in school about 30 days because I get angry at the teachers lack of teaching ability. I don't really want to go back there. We are also facing losing accreditation soon. I want to go to a college that is good. Does anyone have any stories or experience that can help me make a decision?
TL;DR: | My school sucks, thinking about taking last two years online. Does anyone have any stories or experience that can help me make a decision? |
SUBREDDIT: r/college
TITLE: End of Freshman Year and I Still Feel Alone Here
POST: Hey guys. I go to a small rural college far away from home and I'm not doing too well. I have only three people that I feel confident texting to get dinner or anything- I mostly just eat in my room. I'm involved in five clubs and I am going to be an orientation leader. Because of this yes, I know a lot of people that I can say hi to on the quad, but no one ever asks to hang out. I saw a counselor and was depressed in middle school and a little bit of hs and I thought I had it handled, but I had never been more depressed as I was my first semester. It's not as bad now but it still creeps up on me a lot. I'd say 99% of the time I ask people to do stuff with me and 50% of the time I get a no. The school I go to is really cliquey because of the small size and I try really hard to find a group I fit in with or just people that I connect with and I have failed to do this. I had a really tight group of friends in high school so it's really hard to face the fact that I am practically alone here. I don't know why- I dress nicely and do my hair. I like to party but people rarely ask me to go. I always act friendly towards everyone, I even got accepted to be an orientation leader (still a surprise), which is really competitive. I feel like such a loser here and I don't understand why I have failed at forming successful friendships.
On the bright side, I only have one more year on this campus, one semester of which I plan to study abroad because I hate it here so much (I was going to later but I pushed it up a year because of this), and junior year I move to the larger campus. I plan on rushing next fall for the service frat there or a sorority there and just take the shuttle over when I have to.
TL;DR: | Freshman year has flown by and I still have no friends. Has this happened to anyone else? Does it get better? Or do I just have to wait it out? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Switching Degree/Fields in/for Graduate School.
POST: Hello Reddit!
I wasn't sure where to post this. So i will Repost in AskReddit as well I guess.
A bit of background I guess- I am a 21 year old student in University, in my 3rd year. I am doing a double degree in Financial Analysis and International Business as the second. I am looking at graduate schools at this point, as applications are coming up in a few months.
Throughout my life, History has been my passion, particularly Europe and the UK with my mother being from there, and most of my family. My friends know it, and my professors recognize it... however, for work reasons and possible work over-seas, getting a business degree was the obvious route.
After having studied abroad in the UK, getting to spend more time there than a holiday - i realized that is where i want to live, (VISA is no issue.) And I wish to study History or Celtic Studies instead. Problem being... I am a Business major(s). I have taken a few history classes, and the history department have recognized my work as a freshman for being an exemplary student despite being a non-major (i was given an official award.)
How hard is it to get into graduate school for History or Research as a business major? What do I do? It is now late in my college career so i know i can't just change majors. I like what im studying-ish.. and plan to work in banking, but i would like to eventually get a doctorate and teach history.
TL;DR: | 3rd Year Business Major. Want to change to History or Celtic Studies in grad school. WTF do I do, to make my life not shit, or to not end up at work in a career i only slightly enjoy? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17 F] with my best friend [17 F] nearly my whole life, and I want to try to engage in a relationship possibly.
POST: I'm going to try to keep this nice and short.
There's this girl I like. And I've known her for a while, so we're like besties and everything. And I want to ask her out.
And that's something that everyone's been dealing with for a while, but there's this HUGE brick wall in my way: I don't know if she likes girls that way.
And we both go to the same school, and it's a Christian school, and I know most Christians tend to not take kindly to anything but heterosexuality. So I feel like my chances are super slim.
Plus, what if she's a super homophobe or something and makes fun of me and tells everyone? Then I'd have no friends and EVERYONE will know. My life would end.
TL;DR: | I just want a happy relationship, and I'd feel like I'd be happy with her. **Do I just keep quiet in case she'll shoot me down?** |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [29 M] cheated on my wife[26 F]. We have decided to work things out. What can I do to build a much better relationship that what existed before my infidelity?
POST: I cheated on my wife and she found out. We have both decided to work things out. We have started the following:
- Having daily honest conversations about what happened
- I have gone to get tested for STI's and she will be going this week
- I have cut all communication with people she is not comfortable with and I have removed all unnecessary female friends from facebook
- We will be going for couples therapy in 2 weeks time
I know the path we have chosen is by no means easy for us, especially my wife. What things can i do to rebuild that trust that i misused and threw away? What can i be doing to allow my wife to deal with this better?
I am interested to know from those that have gone through the same path. Did you manage to build an even better relationship after the infidelity?
TL;DR: | Cheating husbands that were taken back, how is your relationship now? How have you made it a better relationship than what existed before the cheating? What should i be doing to help my wife deal with this better? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by insulting my Dad's tattoo dedicated to me
POST: Obligatory "this happened a while ago" (last year I believe).
I would like to start by saying that my Dad is my best friend. I love him more than anyone on this earth and he's the best Dad that any Daughter could ask for. Last year, he got his first tattoo - first one in probably like 20 years or more. It was my name and for some reason, this really overwhelmed me. I felt so honoured and so happy. But also really embarrassed - purely because it was so sweet and stuff like that makes me shy. And in my stupid brain, the best I could come up with was, "Umm. It's bit cliché isn't it?" He didn't speak to me for at least a week.
TL;DR: | Dad got a tattoo of my name and because I'm a blithering idiot, I called it a cliché, rather than complimenting it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I [24F] decide whether or not to end my (likely only ever) relationship [8yr] with [24M]?
POST: To preface this, I am autistic and have trouble maintaining relationships/friendships. Outside of family, I have only one (maybe 2) friend. I think it is possible but unlikely for me to have a real, healthy relationship with someone other than "Jeff."
"Jeff" is either depressed (claims he isn't) or simply lacks the motivation to take care of himself. He is Class III obese and always unsuccessfully "trying". He is unemployed and has been half-heartedly pursuing a degree--but won't apply for any internships or volunteer jobs that would help him in the future (I found some for him and he ignored them). Our sex life is hot garbage (due to his weight and his complete lack of interest in pleasing me). He also struggles in social situations (maybe due to his weight?).
Normally, these would be dealbreakers--except that I believe Jeff is really the most perfect companion I could ever hope for. We have wonderful conversations, he is so sweet to me, and he gets me in a way no one else ever has in my entire life. I've never had a friend like Jeff, and he's also completely devoted to me.
Can there be such a thing as a dealbreaker, if there may only ever be one offer? Even if I'm unsatisfied with the relationship, isn't it worth it so that I can keep my best friend? Should I just keep waiting and hoping that things will change?
I often imagine myself with someone who is fit, has their own life, and is confident in going out and having fun with me. Realistically, it is not all that likely that I will find someone who suits me well who has the ability to put up with my issues.
I am also afraid of losing Jeff--we have been together for my entire adult life and this isn't a decision I can try out or undo.
TL;DR: | My relationship is unsatisfactory, but I'm too scared of losing him to end it. How do I decide, when I'm not comparing apples to apples? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Girlfriend is not happy , don't know how to help.
POST: I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years. We are both extremely happy and love eachother. However she isnt happy with her life, for an example: shes worked with a company for 3 years, first year she was working 1 or 2 days a week, barely working at all and just not happy at all. The second year she got an opportunity to change stores for a part time contract 20hrs a week, she was happy about that for a while. The store was struggling(head office not caring about it letting it go), so she was doing 30+ hour weeks at one point, she was happy doing that then she was upset cause she was doing all this work(pretty much running the store on managers day off) and not getting appriciated for it, except by the manager. Then the manager left job was to stressful for her, and then head office sent a temp manager while they found a permanent one every few weeks they would change manager. Finally after a month they found one and 2 new staff members (girlfriend was the only staff member + manager) and my girlfriend was basically just forgotten about the new staff are getting favoured getting asked to stay back more opportunities etc.
ANYWAYS My girlfriend just isnt happy and doesnt know what to do. She wants to leave but she has done so much for the store. Ive told her to look for a new job but she says that its not that easy.
Also im really sorry im absolutely terrible at explaining things.
TL;DR: | girlfriend not treated well at job after all shes done and i dont know how to help her get happy again :/ |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What is your most ridiculous encounter with cops?
POST: I have my second court date in 8 hours for having an unmowed lawn. My public defender told me she'd never seen anything so ridiculous before. To make things even better, it's a misdemeanor, and almost all of the people in court were there for domestic violence or assault. The back story is, a "friend" who was at my house decided to try to steal over $5000 worth of stuff from my friend and I while we were In a different room. He went through both of our rooms, and my friends bag, which was right next to her unconscious body and placed all ofcthe items in our back yard to attempt to sneak through our side gate. He was caught by my roommate and politely kicked out of our house. This all took place at around 5:30am and everyone was either passed out or hammered at that point. My friend noticed one of cameras missing from his room and not in the back yard, so he ran after the "friend" to get it back. He failed to find him anywhere (the "friend" was walking home, as he has no car and lives somewhat close) so he came back to our house, only to find the scumbag trying to sneak through our side gate in an attempt to steal the stuff he had piled up. There's a confrontation outside, my friend comes into the house, and Scumbag punches and breaks our front door window. My roommate grabs a stick and breaks two of his front teeth, scumbag enters house yelling about how he was just assaulted and is a minor (he's not). Roommate calls the cops, he gets arrested, scumbag supervisor cop comes, gives my roommate and I a speech about how he doesnt like either of us because he's been to our house before and arrested me (different story). Calls us both idiots and after 2 hours of scumbag-cop BS, writes us both tickets for having an unmowed lawn, along with a "broken window" ticket (the window scumbag broke) and a "missing window" ticket. The "missing window" was an open window with an air conditioner poorly placed on it. One hour later, I see the scumbag "friend" on Facebook.
TL;DR: | Scumbag friend attempts grand theft and breaks window, scumbag cops let him go and give me ticket for broken window and unmowed lawn. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by not knowing how to properly clean up a toddler's shit covered pajamas.
POST: Hello Reddit, I kinda fucked up this morning. A little background first, I recently moved in with my girlfriend and her two year old, and as a former long time bachelor, I do not have much experience with young kids. Well this morning, the two year old had an accident in her pajamas. In other words, she shit like a 50 year old alcoholic man would have, in her pajamas. They are the kind of pajamas that have little feet in them too (this is key to my fuckup). This was early this morning, and I worked late last night, so I was still half asleep when trying to clean up the mess. I put her pajamas in the washing machine, cleaned her up, and thought, job done. A little later, I opened up the washer and was smacked in the face with the what smelled like 1000 years worth of taco bell shits. I picked up the pajamas, and noticed something squishy in one of the feet. Yep, I washed the pajamas with a pile of turds in one of the feet. Needless to say, they aren't clean, and my laundry room smells like an outhouse at a monster truck rally.
TL;DR: | toddler shit herself, I washed her pajamas with shit hidden in the foot of the pajamas, laundry room smells like shit now. |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: I want to warn landlords and other roommates in Boston about a con artist ex-tenant of mine. Is my idea legal, and/or are there other options I might pursue?
POST: Earlier this year I successfully evicted a tenant who refused to pay rent for 7 months, stole my personal property and owes me about $12,000. This weekend a constable tracked me down and informed me that my former tenant has pulled the same stunt on another girl (his client) up the street who is subletting a room to him. She is now trying to evict him after only two months. I've since come to find out that he has done this to at least one other person.
This tenant's credit already has a judgment on him from my court case earlier this year and I am about to take him to small claims, but it appears that a lot of people don't run credit or background checks around here and thus will fall victim to his well-executed con.
I want to help prevent someone else from being financially victimized by this guy and my idea is to buy a domain and post his name, photo and state only the facts of his MO.
Is this legal? I have reported him to a few websites already, but there are so many students in Boston and I can't imagine any of them would really go to these landlord databases to cross-check the guy's name. I'd like to get something that search engines can crawl and hopefully pick up on when someone tries to Google search for his name.
I'm very open to alternative ideas too.
Thanks!
TL;DR: | I want to host a website to expose a con artist tenant in the Boston area that includes his name, photo and his MO. Is this legal? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Even though my (25f, introverted) boyfriend (25m, extroverted) of 8 months is awesome, I don't feel the same connection I did with my ex (26m, introverted)
POST: My boyfriend is everything I've ever hoped for. I love him and he loves me, we treat each other well, talk about absolutely everything and want to marry some day. But I always feel like something is off. It's not 100%... and it's because he is extroverted. Our thoughts, wishes and behavior are very similar, and people like to point out how great we get along. It's only this one thing that's different... he doesn't see life as a challenge: socializing is no big deal for him, while I have to fight not to embarrass myself in every conversation and can barely keep friends. He views the world differently.
With my ex, it was the other way round. We were both introverts and loved being it with each other. Life was difficult, but only if we couldn't fight a situation together. I never had to explain my weird thoughts to him. We loved each other to death, but the relationship didn't work out for some reasons that don't matter here. I'm completely over him and usually don't even think about him anymore because the breakup happened a year ago. It's only in these moments when I feel like I don't have the connection with my boyfriend that I should have, that I think about my ex and our perfect friendship.
Don't get me wrong, I don't want him back, but I miss the intimacy of a relationship between introverts.
I don't even know if my feelings are reasonable. My ex was very emotionally dependant on me. I was the very most important person on earth for him. He would have died for me with pride. It wasn't healthy how much he adored me, but I savored it anyway.
Now I don't know if I wish for something completely unhealthy or if there really is a problem between me and my boyfriend other than my doubts.
TL;DR: | We don't have the "us against the world" relationship that I did before, and I don't know if I will be okay without it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: Took the first step to escaping a miserable industry, where to put my feet next?
POST: So I basically stumbled into the service industry through a friend a couple years ago, and have basically been treading water in the industry ever since. I derive no enjoyment from it whatsoever, a servers wages are way too up and down to enjoy any financial stability at all, even in fine dining, and leads me to wanting to heavily drink to forget how unhappy I am in this industry.
So I finally told my manager to take me off the schedule after we get through the busy week (and not necessarily quitting, just saying it's too much, too much stress, I need some time), and I still have my other part time job to go on and can pick up extra shifts at if need be until I find a true escape.
But where do I go for sure? I've already applied for 20 jobs today alone (my one day off in two weeks) and I have an interview for a job in my field (graduated w political science degree) but that's only part time, and a friend also helped me get a freelance editing job, but that's gonna be a low income slow build for a while.
I guess I'm just hoping there are like minds that have been in similar footprints and can help me get in a good direction.
TL;DR: | Leaving the service industry, any way, any how, need to find a better life, before I break down into some parody of Leaving Las Vegas. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Am I being unreasonable?
POST: My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year, basically long distance (we live over an hour away from each other). We have insanely conflicting schedules, with maybe only two or three days a week, rarely consecutive, over-lapping.
We both live alone in our respective abodes. He's never had a roommate that wasn't a sibling or a bunch of Marines and absolutely lives in a bachelor pad. His furniture consists of: his bed; a breakfast table & 4 chairs(which doubles as his computer desk); a large, cushioned rocker chair; an entertainment center. Which means that when I visit one of us sits/lays on the floor.
We typically only see each other once a week and usually it's dinner and a movie in. Again, this means at least one of us is sitting on the floor for a good portion of the evening, generally shifting position often because something has gone numb.
Would it be completely unreasonable of me to demand we find another piece of furniture that both of us can sit on? Or at least another comfortable chair (I've gone so far as to bring a camp chair a couple of times just so I don't have to sit on the floor)? I'm at the point where I just flat out don't want to go over there to hang out, it's so uncomfortable. And it's not like it's a holdover from college, we're both over thirty and have been out of school for at least a decade. I'm pretty much the only person he entertains.
Is this a guy thing? What should I do?
TL;DR: | there's nowhere for me to sit in my bf's apt. Am I a bitch if I stop going to see him unless he buys another piece of furniture? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (M 16) really like her (F 18) and she says she likes me but I'm way out of her league
POST: So I'm in marching band (ha ha get the laughs over with). Our drum major (who is basically the leader of the entire ~160 people band is a girl by the name of (not really) Sarah. Sarah is gorgeous, smart, and very talented at what she does. Towards the beginning of the school year she asked me if I wanted to go see a movie so I thought "wow she's seriously got to be joking" but she wasn't, we went to the movie and everything was great. Since then we have been on a few, maybe 3 or 4, dates and things have been going okay. I say this because I have been fucking it up bad. I really like her but she's so far out of my league that there are soooo many other guys that are more attractive, more talented, and all that other shit and I feel like she could just switch to them at any moment. But after each time that I bring it up I realize that I'm just driving her away and the more I ask her about it the less she wants to be with me. What do I do.
TL;DR: | I really like a girl that states that she likes me but she's so far out of my league I can't believe her |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Having issues telling boyfriends what my job is...
POST: No slut shaming, please!
I am 20F, and I am running into problems telling my boyfriends what I do for a living. During the day I have a job where I do basic tech support for a small company, but I only have 30 hours a week and get paid barely over minimum wage. This is not enough to pay my bills.
At night, I am a webcam model. I have been doing this since I turned 19, and it is how I make almost all of my money. I am very successful at this, but I've never made top 100 or anything like that. Yes, I am nude on camera, and yes, I do everything just like almost all the other webcam girls you see out there. This does not bother me, as I look nothing like I do in real life when I go on camera. (I wear a wig, different makeup, cover my tattoos, etc)
My problem is that every guy who I ever date ends up wondering where I get all my money. They know I am in college studying electrical engineering (I have a 3.8 GPA at a 4 year state school), and that I am in general a very shy person. They also know that I do not make a lot of money at my day job. It just does not fit in with how I present myself in public, as most people see me as the shy nerdy girl who has her nose buried in textbooks and a kindle.
Every time I try to tell a partner what I do for a living, he freaks out. I've dated three men since I started webcamming, and I dropped hints about my profession to all three. None of them seemed okay with the idea. The one that I told dumped me after we had dated for 4 months. It is hard to hide what I do because I work about 4-5 nights a week. I make on average $4000 a month from both jobs, which is way more than a lot of people my age. I don't know if they are jealous, or what and I need some help before I ruin all of my relationships!
TL;DR: | I'm a webcam model and a college student and I don't know how to reveal it to a potential boyfriend without ruining everything. |
SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: SO broke up with me over the computer.Should I be angry/disappointed with him?(More details inside)PS-I'm a girl.
POST: So my SO and I have almost been going out for a year.We had a good relationship from what I can tell.We were both close friends before it,we both had very strong feelings for each other for a while,etc.Very few negative instances though.There would be times where my SO would become stressed and agitated with my maturity. Mostly the way I acted in public,I'm a genuinely curious and strange gal and I can't help but be very 'outgoing' but there have been times where he would become annoyed by it,and my attitude towards anything sexual.I'm very akward when it comes to sex and incredibly intimate situations.It's something that always made me uncomfortable but I'm starting to accept it more thanks to having been in a relationship.My SO didn't seem to understand this completely though.He's more physical ,if you know what I mean,while I'm the more emotional one and am nervous with such intimacy.About a day after my birthday,my SO texts me and tells me we have to 'talk'(We both lived in the same area but due to college I had to move a few states away so it became a LDR).Instead of calling me or using a webcam over the internet he types the dreaded breakup talk.Basically he wants to "take a break" because he's stressed due to college and his job,and then when it comes to me and my behavior in the relationship he just can't take it,and he wants his space.So after this all I'm quite upset but we both agree to stay good friends, but I won't contact him for a while since he said he wanted 'space'.Is the way he went through with this break up wrong?Should I be upset?I'd just like to hear an opinion from somebody here in /r/Breakups.Anything is much appreciated <3.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend/SO broke up with me over internet.No phone call,no webcam.Should I be angry with him?And was it wrong of him to break up with me in such a way? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Do you remember what you were doing before you decided to browse reddit for the first time?
POST: I was in poetry class and I was fucking bored. The teacher was doing her weekly "let every fuck-tard read their long-ass thing to everyone, like we care, and give no marks out for anything involving any of it except for you reading your long-ass thing nobody cares about." and my brain checked out. At this point, things get a bit hazy. I was on knowyourmeme.com and saw the meme "The narwhal bacons at midnight." The related pictures drew a smile to my face and then everything just goes blank. Memory is lost in a sea of cat pictures, rage comics, wild and outlandish TIL's and Rick Santorum insults. Never have I known so much and remembered so little. This was the end of productivity.
TL;DR: | Before, I was lazy, unproducttive, and bored. Now I'm lazy, unproductive and happy....I think. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU - By flashing a group of kids with cancer
POST: So this happened about 3 years ago, Me and a couple friends decided to go on a last minute trip on a friday afternoon a few hours north up the coast to go camping.
We camped out that night and decided to go swimming at the beach the next day, which was deserted at this point, after a bit of swimming my ass just decided that it was time, so i ran off to the small beach toilet/shower block nearby and went to do my business.
This is the point where the story goes downhill, i've almost finished having my dump and the other guys had found a bucket of fish guts and heads stewing in water which some fisherman had left behind after filleting. They thought it would be funny to pour this over the top of the stall onto me, and boy that shit was rancid! I immediately start dry reaching, and go to wipe my ass and get out, but the toilet roll is also soaked in fish gut stew and falls apart like paper mache. So i pull up my shorts a little, open the door and dash straight across the room into the beach style wall shower, turn on the freezing cold water and start washing chunks of fish out of my hair and trying to wash my ass by splashing water up with my hand. While im doing this i didn't hear the footsteps of half a dozen kids running into the toilet to relieve themselves, they all rush around the corner get halfway past me and we see each other at the same time, they stop dead staring at me with mouths open, im hunched over with my hand between my ass cheeks and there is a good second of stunned silence, then the kids walk over to the urinals and i rip up my shorts and run out of the bathroom quicker than your can say "sex offender".
My good 'ol mates are outside pissing themselves, they had seen a bus rock up and the kids get out to go to the toilet but not warned me.
And the cherry on top, still stinking of rotten fish i turn towards the bus that they were pointing to, and fuck me it's a "camp quality" bus, which is an Australian charity for kids with cancer.
TL;DR: | Friends threw fish guts on me in the toilet, im washing off in a shower, kids with cancer see me scrubbing my ass out. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 F, survivor of sexual assault] found out that a guy [30 M] I went on a few dates and slept with, was cheating on his girlfriend with me. Now I feel like an idiot and severely doubting myself
POST: I've had some trust issues after a guy I dated drugged and date raped me a year ago. My self-confidence went down the toilet and I stopped going on dates all together until last week, my friend begged me to start dating again so I can gain my confidence back. So I started on OkCupid and Tinder.
I met this really funny and cute guy and went on a few dates with him. He was very nice to me, always complementing me and very sweet. He made me feel safe.
It all changed after we had sex, he didn't contact me the next day which was different from the constant texting back and forth we had. I didn't sweat it or reach out, I thought he was just busy. But I was starting to get confused as the days go on. Then today (it's been 3 days), I was still dumbfounded on why he stopped contacting me since things were going so well, I saw him on the "people you may know" part of Facebook, curious, I clicked on it, and saw that he changed his profile pictures to him and another girl, who was consistently appearing in his other pictures since two years ago.
I felt so played, and such AN IDIOT for falling for his sweet talk and looks. And I'm beating myself up for sleeping with him. I feel very USED.
Maybe I just don't know how to choose men, I've always had a lot of guys chasing me but it seems like they all just want to have sex with me. I started to have flashbacks of what happened that night last year.. I was laying helplessly on the bed while the guy I was dating ripped off my clothes. It feels like guys just want one thing from me.
Sorry for the wall of text. I guess I just wanted to rant. A bunch of other unlucky things happened today and I just... feel like crying. I know I probably sound like an idiot, I don't have anyone else to tell these things to. I'm terribly embarrassed about being played like this.
TL;DR: | A guy I was seeing was cheating on his girlfriend with me. I found out and am feeling terrible. Having been sexually assaulted, I feel like I can no longer trust men, and severely doubting myself. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Dogtraining
TITLE: Dog is literally scared of everything!
POST: I just found this subreddit/am new to reddit! Hoping for some kind advice for my two year old soft coated wheaten terrier who has developed a fear of, well, *everything*. Namely:
* noise (talking traffic, bags blowing, stomping/scuffing feet while walking, things falling). Strangely, everything but thunder!
* going for walks (which I assume has to do with the noise). It's like she experiences a sensory overload and goes into full-fledged panic attack/avoidance. Sometimes she will even refuse to go out into our backyard for a pee.
* people talking in loud voices (if my boyfriend and I are even having a loud discussion she will either sit and shake, or hide under my bed).
* children.
There is an entire list of other issues but these seem to be the ones that concern me the most, considering they affect her everyday life. She started out alright, but as she gets older, she is getting worse (save for being outside, as we have moved to the quieter suburbs but she gets spooked often).
We have had her since she was a puppy; unfortunately she did come from a pet store/puppy mill so i'm not sure whether that has anything to do with her nature or not. We did the bulk of her training while we were living in an apartment in the city so she has had *plenty* of exposure to noise and hectic surroundings. It's not like she's in an abusive household, so the fear of loud voices is strange to me. She's always been around children but has always shied away from them. Her preferred method of dealing with her panic is to flee; I truly don't believe she would ever become fear aggressive.
Ideas? We have tried high-reward treats but she is not food motivated at all. We have tried reassurance, and have been told to knock it off because it will confuse her. We have tried to limit exposure, and over-expose her...neither works. I just worry that the more things we try, the more confused she gets.
TL;DR: | Dog is afraid of everything, I am worried and at wit's end because she's such a loveable girl that I want to share her with everyone! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I [25M] handle my SO [25F] hanging out with another guy?
POST: Length of relationship: 4 years
We're currently long distance (been separate for about 3 months, 1 month to go). My SO has been spending a lot of time with a new friend she met. He has a GF and seems pretty committed to her. But I know that my SO is attracted to this guy (she told me this). I know she loves me and that she respects our relationship and his relationship with his SO, however it does bother me that she is spending a lot of time with him. I guess I'm afraid that them spending a lot of time together will lead to the formation of an emotional attachment (Can two people who are attracted to each other ever just remain friends?)
The thing is there's nothing I can do about it. I listen to her talk about him, let her go hang out with him and act completely normal about it because I know if I request that she doesn't spend time with him one of two things will happen:
1) She will hang out with him anyway (I have no way of knowing what she does).
2) She won't hang out with him but will resent me and that might essentially push her away from me and cause her to have even MORE feelings for him.
I love my SO and I trust her but I just hate this whole scenario. Is there anything I can do to prevent my fears from becoming a reality?
TL;DR: | My SO is hanging out with a new guy friend I know she is attracted to and I can't do anything about it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [~18/F] Girlfriend is going to a male strip club on her birthday
POST: >Have been dating for 6 months, she's in college in a different state
Yeah so I'm just a bit upset about the whole thing. I asked her what her plans are on her bday (she goes to Uni in different state) and she told me she's going to a strip club with her friends.
Her friends are all binge drinkers and from all she's told me about their adventures, I can honestly see them edging her on to do some shit. They will of course be drinking prior.
I'm just looking for insight from anyone who has a SO girl that goes to male strip clubs. Or even any one that goes to male clubs.
*Extra insight, about my feelings and all that good stuff*
I'm very jealous, but it's not like I'm going to ever tell her "no" as she probably wouldn't listen to me anyways. She was back home for the past week so I saw her and spent a lot of time with her.
She asked me about if I'd be mad. I told her "no, I wouldn't be mad, I'm just uncomfortable with the whole situation." I said to her to imagine me going to a strip club and getting on with a half dressed women.
I've expressed how I felt, and said I didn't want to sound like an ass. I didn't say anything mean or rude to her, I simply told her how it made me feel.
I've fought threw a lot of self conscious problems and anxiety/depression my entire life. She's very attractive and she always tells me how guys always go up to her and try "get along". It's so hard being in a LDR only because I don't know what the hell even happens anymore. Don't get me wrong, I trust her a lot, it's just I don't trust her friends or any of the people in the damned state she's in.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend going to male stripclub with her friends, they are drinking prior. Anyone with similar experiences mind giving me insight on what/how I should fell?*** |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I was [23F] seeing a guy [27M] since November, I broke it off in February now he's texting me and wants to hangout.
POST: Hi All,
I'll try to make this as straight to the point that I can, sorry for any typos in advance - posting this quickly before work.
We started seeing each other in November, there really seemed to be a connection - he treated me very well. Taking me out to dinners and even taking me down south for a long weekend at a beach house. It was pretty awesome. Then at the end January it kind of changed to the point that it felt like more like just a casual physical fling. Which I wasn't a fan of, so I gave him an ultimatum either a proper relationship or nothing. He couldn't commit so that was it. Or so I thought.
Every weekend night for the next two months I'd hear from him drunkenly apologizing for not committing. Didn't respond, but now half way through April I start hearing from him during the day when no alcohol was involved, wanting to just hangout. I'm not sure what his end goal here, but now I'm at a point where I don't want a relationship for a while and I don't know whether I should casually hangout with the boy and see where it goes.
I'm not a fool, I'm 90% sure he's just after a physical thing. My question for reddit is whether going back to this guy is a smart move, I'm not sure whether it would be a respectable? A little bit lost at the moment.
TL;DR: | I was seeing a guy since November, I broke it off in February now he's texting me and wants to hangout. I want to but I don't know whether I'm going to lose respect in doing so? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What are we doing to our culture?
POST: I was just wondering about what the internet will do to the creativity of our generation and the culture of America going forward.
Here's my train of thought: It used to be that someone who liked to paint or write or play music would do so in privacy. Only those with drive, lucky opportunity, a ton of work, and the right connections would ever be "discovered" by mass culture and possibly have the opportunity to devote their life to it (i.e. get paid). A painting you made, for instance, hung in your house for only your family and your visitors to see. End of story. Now, pretty much no matter what you create, it's very easy to "show the world" or at least put it somewhere where others can see it, regardless of whether or not someone actually looks.
We are a prolifically creative generation: I have an Etsy shop, my big brother and husband have their music on ReverbNation, and my little brother is uploading a novel onto Amazon this week. And, it's the same for a lot of people. The popularity of these sites is just flabbergasting. There is so much being produced.
But is it any good? What are we doing to our culture? Are we making cultural clutter? Does the ability to easily sell or show one's creations inspire us to try harder at our hobbies than we would if it were private? Will we make more awesome culture than other generations or condemn our culture to the mediocrity of hobbyists? Will us hobbyists drown out the potential geniuses of our generation?
TL;DR: | Is art of all sorts on the internet making our culture richer and more amazing or making it cluttered and underwhelming? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Would it be weird to bring someone other than my boyfriend to prom?
POST: My boyfriend is a few years older than me, and as of right now I don't know if my school has any rules regarding the age of guests. We've talked about it before and I know he isn't DYING to go with me (he hates dancing, doesn't want to hang out with a bunch of sloppy teenagers) and I don't want to have to put him through that.
I know it's cliche and slightly immature of me, but I don't really want to go to prom dateless, even if I know I have the most amazing boyfriend waiting to take me out for dinner later, or whatever.
Now, I would obviously be going with this other person as **friends** and I would make that abundantly clear to him, but I think the other guy I was thinking of bringing has a crush on me, or feelings for me of some sort. I've known him since October (I work with him) and he's only 20, so I have a feeling he would have a much better chance of being let in.
I'm obviously going to talk to my boyfriend about it, but I don't even want to mention it if I get a negative reaction on here. I don't want to hurt his feelings.
TL;DR: | my boyfriend is probably too old to go to a high school prom, would it be weird if I brought a boy more my age if we went as friends? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24 F] need help handling a breakup with my bisexual boyfriend [26 M]. Could he have ever been satisfied with just me?
POST: Met my (now) ex-boyfriend at work about 10 months ago. We instantly clicked, started living together after a couple of months, and were best friends.
As time passed he made comments about threesomes (with a girl or guy) and hooking up with men (he has done this in the past- but it was 'just sex') as well as other women. He constantly reminded me that he had these fantasies and really wanted to them to happen. Bringing anyone else into the relationship was a hard "no" for me.
At the same time, we talked seriously about our promising future as a couple.
Eventually I broke down and couldn't handle his criticism and dissatisfaction. Was I right for ending things? Neither of us wanted to end the relationship, but these issues made it seem like the right thing to do. I miss everything about him and wish that this wasn't such a big issue for us. I've lost my best friend. I'm a firm believer in NC and we haven't communicated since the breakup, which was about a month ago.
If anyone has any wisdom or kind words to help me through this, I would appreciate them more than you know. This breakup is hitting me extremely hard.
TL;DR: | Recently broke up with my boyfriend because his bisexuality was driving a wedge in our relationship. When will the pain go away? Was this the right thing to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Anyone else think the Queen of England should NOT be speaking to the UN?
POST: So I'm kinda pissed that this even happened. I'm an american, first of all. And I'm pissed that this woman who does nothing but own a title and has not even contributed to working toward world peace/justice/etc like her grandsons do was allowed to address the UN.
Then she visited Ground Zero and some young american girls CURTSIED to her! Did we not just celebrate July 4th? Did we not fight a huge war so that we don't HAVE to curtsey to foreign title owning wastes of humanity?
This fucking Queen has not contributed to society in any way during all of her years of reign. In fact she's worked toward bankrupting the English people b/c they have to support her. Cut that woman loose. Make her work a day in her life or require her to pay her dues by working toward world peace/justice/etc in her country and in the world.
TL;DR: | A title doesn't give you the right to address the UN especially when you've spent your life sucking money from people. And no american should ever courtsey to a foriegn "monarch" |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [M22] Looking for relationship advice
POST: The girl [F21] that I have been on/off with since 9th grade have been taking our relationship very seriously over the last 1.5 years or so. The progress has truly been great and up until a month or so ago I was looking forward to starting a life together. However, upon waking up one day I realized that I may not be as passionate about things as she is.
We all hear "find a woman you can bring home to mom" and she really is. She recently met a big chunk of my family and everyone loves her. Quite possibly, everyone besides me. I have been constantly torn between working it out and putting in my final words and moving on.
I yearn for romance and a strong relationship and always have. 7 years is a long time and both of us have grown/ changed a lot in that time. Is it wrong for me to want to throw a new line into the lake and see what I might catch? For the longest time I thought this girl was the only open door for me so I just kind of settled.
Lately, I have become a lot more confident in myself which has translated into a want for something new. The real question is, am I a jerk for wanting to throw everything away and start new or, is this completely normal for someone my age? Am I simply growing up?
TL;DR: | I am still so young. Do I feel wrong for exploring my possibilities or do I feel excited for what life could possibly have in store for me? |
SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: How do I [16F] tactfully break up with my [17M] boyfriend?
POST: Okay, so we pretty much fight every other day, sometimes really big ones and generally he starts them and will just start ignoring me. Despite this, he's absolutely crazy about me and texts me all the time and always does everything in his power to hang out with me. Before dating me he never smiled and now he's constantly happy unless we're arguing or I'm gone. We both go to military school and next year he's going to be working directly under me and the main reason I'm not breaking up with him is because it'd be terrible to have an ex at school. It could undermine all of my authority.
I have to see him in 4 out of 7 of my classes. He's going to be required to sit at my table for every meal too. There's only 150 people there, and breakups are always so much drama. But then again, our relationship is a lot of drama too. I want to look like a professional leader, but last time a girl broke up with him (after 1 month), he made a huge deal of it and got a lot of people to hate her. He's fairly popular so it wasn't too hard. I don't know how to break it off without getting half the kids there (his friends) to hate me.
We're supposed to hang out this summer. Should I try and break up with him right after summer starts to give him maximum healing? I'm also kind of worried I'll regret not always having someone there for me. There's very few girls compared to guys there, so it wouldn't be hard to get another boyfriend, but I just want to stay single and independent. Please help.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend likes me a lot more than I like him, will make half of the school (mostly boys) hate me if I break up. What do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is it ever okay to send a short note after a break-up? (Me 20F, Him 21M, one year)
POST: Yes, I already posted about the relationship and break up yesterday. See the original post here:
At this point I'm just wondering if I could give him a short note I wrote to him. We're seeing each other tomorrow to exchange things and the break-up has still been very polite.
The note is not mean, it's not manipulative. I think I've realized it's not going to be worth trying to get back together, so the note isn't really about that. It's mostly just thanking him for the good times we had, apologizing for a few things, and wishing him luck. It's basically everything I've wished I could have said during the break-up that I really didn't get the chance to because of all the emotions.
After our meet up tomorrow, we'll both be going out of town for separate trips, so it will be easier to begin No Contact then. I just want to say a few things before I start that.
TL;DR: | Would it be dumb to give a polite, non-manipulative letter to my recent ex before starting No Contact. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Where are the jobs? Is it the job market, or me?
POST: I've searched, called, emailed, hit the pavement, lied on some resumes just for fun. In the past 7 months I have only had a few interviews and my most recent one I went in to apply for a sales position and they said you have what it takes but we would like to start as an assistant/intern, which pays, to show us you have what it takes. I said great lets do this. Went through a 2 hour interview, and a week later I got an email saying thank you, but you lack experience. How in the hell do I lack experience for a position that requires no experience?
My job history is primarily sales and debt collection countless hours talking to people and I cant even guess how many phone calls. I have a BFA (ya i know) from NYU. I cant keep a job for even a year before I am fired for, lack of being a team player (bullshit) or just didnt hit the numbers (when i crush all quotas and beat out other coworkers) I dont get it.
I feel I have a great business mindset and ideas, I would want nothing more than to start my own company, but I know I need startup capitol and I dont know where to look, family and friends is a dead end, and I dont have a credit history. I dont know Reddit, I am starting to lose it...please help.
TL;DR: | Unemployed for 7 months, countless attempts to find work, cannot. Would like to start a business, no capitol. Help. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: What would you do? (US)
POST: Hello, looking for some ideas to help me in the future. Short story is my fiancé and are getting married next year, then we plan on having kids about 5 or 6 years after that. When we have kids we would like to buy a home here in NYC. Until then, I'm not sure what to do with our savings. We have a 6 month emergency fund, are fully contributing to our 401ks, no debt, and are saving about $1800 every month. We've got about 80k more than that which we would like to turn into as much money as possible in 6-7 years. What would you do? Some of the money is currently invested, most is not. I'm hoping to hear some outside the box type ideas, I'm not risk averse, just would like to hear something other than index funds which is the obvious safe choice.
TL;DR: | looking for some creative ideas for turning 80k into more money in 6-7 years, risky or not. Thanks |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by pressing my hand to hard to my eye... At the doctor.
POST: At first you have to know: I am a firefighter. Every firefighter in my country gets checked every five years.
So today was the day. My last check expired. It was time for a new one.
The check itself isn't hard. It's just testing your physical strenght and you do some normal stuff, such as eye testing.
So my doctor held a plate with digits and letters on it in the air and told me to close my right eye. I, beeing a genius as usual, thought i would see more if i just put my hand over the right eye, pressing it, and not closing it. Well, this is where the disaster happend. I read the first line of letters perfect with my right eye closed. Second, third, last line: no problems.
But when the doc said i should switch eyes, i noticed it. I saw like nothing. I looked in the air for like 5 seconds and then i felt ready for the first line. Well, it was a little hard, but it worked. But when he switched to the second line, i couldn't read anything anymore.
I tried to tell the doc what happend, but it was to late. I guess there were to many patients waiting, so he noticed that my left eye had a problem and told me to leave.
Thank god i still have the license to fight fires.
TL;DR: | went to doctor, he checked my eyes, i am a genius, pressed hand to much into the eye, saw nothing at the check, |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Body shaving? Bf 32M wants me 27F to shave him. Been together 1.5 years. Don't want to do it.
POST: My bf wants me to shave his back and I really don't want to because it kind of grosses me out, and turns me off from seeing him in a sexual way. He's been asking for a while now, and I keep saying no. I did it once months ago, but he'd been asking for about over two months before I finally did it so he'd stop asking (yes, fully aware that the hair would grow back and he'd ask me again).
Anyway tonight he's asked again and as usual I said no and he asked, "why is it so hard?!" and I said, "it's not I just don't want to, it's weird and kind of grosses me out " which of course he took personally and thinks in calling him gross. I just don't want to do it. End of story. Am I a shitty girlfriend? Is it my job to do this? I don't ask him to shave any of my body hair and I definitely wouldn't want him to anyway. I can get rid of my body hair myself and if I cant/don't want to I go get it waxed at a salon.
Please help, I feel bad saying no to him but I'm getting annoyed that he keeps asking knowing my response is and will always be no.
TL;DR: | bf wants me to shave his back. Asks often. I say no I don't want to do it but he still keeps asking. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [33F] Boyfriend [37 M] 8 months, don't talk about issues. Ideas how to bring them up?
POST: We were friends for 18 months before we started dating and have been in a committed, exclusive relationship for the last 8 months. He doesn't talk about issues. When I try to bring something up, he says he gets overwhelmed... so I have pretty much left most things alone. I have tried to take a step back from something that I see as an issue and try to decide if it really is an issue, well something has recently come up that is a serious issue. I tried to bring up last night before bed and he just nodded and ignored it. I brought it up today on IM because some people just can't talk about emotions but can type them out... he sent a ":(" face and ignored all other IM's. I have tried to keep the mood light when bringing up the issue so he knows that it isn't a deal breaker, but that we need to work through it. I don't know how else to bring things up or to get him to open up emotionally. Ideas?
TL;DR: | He doesn't like to talk about emotions or issues, he prefers to act like they don't exist. Suggestions to help me get him to want to talk about things? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25 M] with my wife [25 F] married almost three years. She moved out and will not go to marriage counseling with me.
POST: I have not been the best husband. I have gotten angry with my wife, yelled, and called her names. I have my depression control my life, I have said that I was going to hurt myself after several arguments. She has told me that I needed to get myself help. I saw two different counselors over a period of a couple of months. Things did get better for a little while, but I relapsed soon after. A couple of days ago she packed up and is now living with her friend. She also has not had sex with me for the past couple of months, she said that she emotionally couldn't do it anymore.
I've noticed major changes in her personality. When we first got married she was very anti alcohol. We had major arguments about me drinking when I would go up to the cabin with my friends which is the only time I ever drink. I'm very responsible when it comes to that, I have never been drunk in my life. Now she has been going out with her friends drinking all the time, and she also got plastered when she went away for a weekend with her friends. It was just totally out character for her.
She said the main reason was that I didn't get the help that I needed, and that I didn't schedule a marriage counseling appointment for us. I scheduled one for us for next week and I gave her the date and time, but she has told me multiple times that she will not go. She keeps saying it's too late and that I'm not going to change. Our marriage has not been all bad, we have had a lot of good times, but lately she has been demonizing it which has really been hurtful to me.
I'm so upset. I know this is my fault deep down. I really feel that there is nothing left for me.
TL;DR: | I let depression control my life, and my wife of three years moved out and refuses to go to marriage counseling with me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: It's fun to get revenge at the YMCA.
POST: So I was at the YMCA on the stair-stepper when I decided to put both my feet on one foothold and pull myself back and forth with my hands. Then, this grouchy old lady who works there came over and stood right by me while I started to do it normal again. After fifteen seconds of this she says, (with a stupid smirk on her face) "Don't you think your too old to be using the equipment incorrectly?" I reply by saying sure and she strides back to her computer perch where she can keep a decrepit eye on the room.
Five minuets later I decided to get my revenge. I slowly snuck from the stair-stepper, to the treadmill, and to the bike, until I was pedaling comfortably by her computer. After studying her computer in the mirror, I waited until she was refilling the gym wipes, which were away from her computer, to take my revenge. I stood up and quickly unplugged her mouse.
After I circled back through the weight room and got back on my original stair-stepper, I was able to witness the aftermath. She was violently shaking her mouse for at least minute before she stood up and took another minute plugging it back in.
TL;DR: | Snide old lady yells at me, she gets to try to figure out why her mouse isn't working for two minuets. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (23M) don't know what to do about my good friend's advances (23F).
POST: Throwaway because I'm sure she's on Reddit more than I am.
As the title suggests, I'll give a little backstory.
We've never dated or had sex in the 10 years we've known each other, one of us was always in another relationship.
Over the years we haven't seen or talked to each other too much, but whenever we've been together it's ALWAYS been a blast. We get along incredibly well, almost as if it hadn't been a year or a few months since we last spoke.
We've again recently connected in the past month or so, but her attitude towards me has changed greatly.
She comments about my body, and she's always nudging herself closer to me, telling me things she likes about me, and I've caught her eyeing me up more than once.
I should point out this is the first time in our adult lives we've reconnected and both been single. And we're both fresh-ish out of pretty toxic relationships.
We have had mutual feelings for each other that we've talked about in the past, but as I said one of us was always in a relationship, and loyalty is paramount to both of us, so it never went anywhere (honest).
I just can't decipher if it's just me coming out of a relationship and wanting to seize the opportunity, or the feelings I had for her once are resurfacing.
Would it be worth persuing, risking what has been the longest standing friendship of my life?
TL;DR: | Liked a girl, she liked me but we won't cheat on others. She makes advances years later (both single) fresh out of other relationships. Not sure if ready, even though I want to be. HALP. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What practical joke have your friends played on you that turned out worse than everyone expected?
POST: For me, this may not be the worst but the first that comes to mind. Me and 2 of my buddies were hanging out, we were about 17. Well, we were supposed to sneak out and spend the night at some girls house. So we all told our parents the old "I'm staying at so and so's house" and they told their parents they were staying at someone elses house kinda deal. So we all go to this girls house and she's like "Sorry you can't stay now" so we had nowhere to go. So we ended up sleeping in our cars in a parking lot, or trying. Well, we ended up just staying in the parking lot all night. Morning rolls around and we go back to her house after her mom left for work to hang out. Well we didn't sleep like at all so we were all tired as hell. So we decided to take a nap. Now, don't ask me why, but when I was younger and a bit more agile, I used to just randomly do ninja rolls (basically just run and do a somersault real quick and pop back up). Well, 2 of us had to sleep on couches in the living room and one of us got to sleep on the floor in her room. Being 17 we were all trying to stay in there with her. So there's blankets and pillows laid out on the floor and we all go running up the stairs to get it first. I decided "Ok time to be a badass" and I did a flying ninja flip on to the blankets. Well, I soon found out that they thought it would be funny to put a big metal jack under the blanket. (You know the game jacks, where you bounce a ball and pick up the jacks? It was one of those but about 20 times larger) So I proceed to flip and land right on this thing right on my spine. Needless to say, it was very painful and could have turned out pretty bad had that hit me in the wrong spot landing all my weight on it. I was nearly in tears for about 10 minutes it hurt so bad. SO that's mine. What's yours?
TL;DR: | Friends hid an abnormally large metal jack under a blanket and I did a ninja flip and landed on it right on my spine. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [21M] interested in a girl, but I move too fast into relationships. How to move slower and not make her feel like I'm lying to her.
POST: Hi r/relationships!
I met a girl on Tinder maybe 10 days ago. We really hit it off; we have a lot in common. I like her. She goes a school very close to my school, but unfortunately, we weren't able to meet up before we both had to leave for the summer. So now, we're stuck doing the long distance relationship thing either until we can see each other (definitely when school starts, but her friends may take a road trip to my city in the middle of the summer because they've always wanted to go according to her).
Here's the problem - I have a pattern of moving too fast into relationships and fail to see the signs or ignore that little voice in the back of my head until I snap back to reality and realize what's really going on. In the context of this relationship (and every other relationship I've had) when I come to eventually, I back off suddenly so she feels lied to and led on and it really sucks that I have that effect on people that I like.
TL;DR: | How can I move slower without turning her off (and hopefully silence the negative voice in the back of my head)? |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Trying to decide if I should keep more facial hair or not?
POST: I am in my second year of university. Since I came to university it has become very difficult for me to meet girls I'm into or hook-up.
I am confident that I am a pretty attractive guy, going by the girls I dated/had things with in high school. But as soon as I came to uni, bam that all sort of stopped.
Could be a number of reasons, but I've also realized, especially for a club setting (can go to bars/clubs at 19 here), I have a very young face. I get told that all the time. Not really baby fat or anything, just look young, especially when I'm clean shaven. I am 20 but probably look 17 or 18 clean shaven.
Coupled with being just under 5'8", I think a lot of girls at clubs/bars (or uni in general) might think I look too young.
I am able to grow a nice bit of facial hair for my age, a lot more than 85% of my friends. I just HATE the way it looks on me, the feel, the look, etc. I'm getting over this a bit, but maybe I just dislike it because I cannot fathom the appeal that women would see in it.
I can see the appeal of muscles, eyes, facial structure in a guy, and I can definitely tell when a guy is really attractive, but facial hair? Just seems so fucking gross, literally pubes on your face. From my own straight guys perspective, I personally see anything more than a day or two of stubble to instantly start taking away from physical attractivness.
I can't grow a full beard or anything, but it's getting there. Do you think it's worth growing my facial hair simply in an attempt to look older? From polls on reddit, it seems a lot of women actually prefer facial hair, but I'm not sure about the sample population. I could definitely see women around 30 loving facial hair, but what about college age, 18-22 y/o women?
TL;DR: | when is facial hair attractive, when is it not? if my goal is to look older (in a good way, making myself look my age, 20) is growing my facial hair a good idea? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Anyone have an interesting or bizarre story about losing their virginity? I'll go first...
POST: I was 16 and living on the streets. A girl I met found out that I was still a virgin and decided she wanted to take it. She took me to a a very rundown abandoned retail/industrial building (they used to make musical instruments or something on-site) that a number of people in the area used for a squat. This place had 2 ways in: a hole in the roof where an HVAC unit or fan used to be, and a set of lattice windows in the alley that were boarded up each time the place was raided, and subsequently torn back down. We were lucky and didn't have to climb all the way up to the roof (which was a major PITA to do) since the plywood had been torn down recently, but the window frames were rather small and it was a tight squeeze.
We go into one of the few dry rooms in the place, set up our bedding, do the deed, and then pass out. A few hours later I wake up to the sound of walkie talkies, and when I peek out, I can see emergency flashers in the alley. We figure the place is being raided again, so we decide to go up to the second floor, crawl out the hole in the roof and then sit up there until they're gone so that we don't have to break back in later, however when we get there and look up, we see a wall of flame. We booked it to the windows at the back and crawl out, to the surprise of the firefighters in the alley, and took off. The abandoned building next door had caught fire (some said it was torched by the owner for insurance), and although it didn't burn down the building we were in, it damaged it enough that they ended up razing both buildings shortly after.
The girl decided to go off somewhere without me, and I ran into a nice old gay guy that had given me money a few times before and he took me to a 24 hour cafe and bought us some coffees, which we drank sitting at a table with some of the local TG prostitutes he knew.
TL;DR: | Lost my virginity to a girl I barely knew in an abandoned building, building next door burnt down in the middle of night, could've taken us with it, DM;HS |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (26M) took a 2 week long tripwith my father and i highly suspect gf [21F] [9months] cheated on me (had sex) while i was gone... whats the best way to comfront this?
POST: Weve been together almost 9 month, she moved here from out of state and met online about 2 weeks after she got here. She recently moved in with me ....
About a 2 weeks before i left for this trip she put a lock on her phone which i found odd cause she never had one before. I asked her about it but she never really did answer why. Weve been haveing relationship issues latly with a mix of her not being fun enough
, or doing enough around the house or not haveing enough sex .
Dont get me wrong, for a guy i have rather low sex drive , i help around the house but i could do more, but i also pay most of the bills....it really seems like he life before she moved she was a party girl and loved being out and parting each weekend while i prefer just to stay home or go to the lake or woods.....so i get its a big move for her but still ....
. but to make a longer story short cell phone bill is in my name i can see her text and it basicly shows that she had other guys (3 different) over while i was on my trip ....one text she sent out basicly said that she just wasnt to be friends and she doesnt want to be with guys to have sex she wants to just hang ....... .... what the best way to confront this?
Part of me just wants to see if she will tell me with out myself forcing it out of her and forgiving her... and to just giveher this one chance...cause i i do love her and know we are only human..... that being said it still hurts bad and that part says that if she does it now she will do it again so i should just drop her like a rock ... i dont know where to go from here what should i do ?
TL;DR: | In 9 month relationship things been fuzzy latly, highly suspect her of cheating while on a trip with father ... should i forgive or drop her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21F] with my husband [25M] married one year, together three, he has romantic mementos from an EX and its stressing me out.
POST: So, my husband and I are fixing to move house (again) across the country. It's stressing me out to no end and I don't know if the current frustration I feel is because of that or because of what I accidentally found in our shared closet.
I was doing a massive binge clean in our closet. I went through all my clothes and tossed what i don't wear and tossed all non essentials of mine that I found in boxes. I found a box that was unlabeled and didn't remember putting in the back corner of my half of the closet. When I opened it there was a black sketchbook sitting on top. I thought it was one of mine from highschool that I'd forgotten about. It wasn't. Its a super cheesy scrap book from my husband's ex-girlfriend. The first page I opened to was I Love You and lots of pictures. I closed it and put it back and he doesn't know I found it.
I'm more than a little hurt. When we moved in together and I was helping him pack I found a heart that she made him and got really upset (I was pregnant and hormonal) that he kept something from her. I don't know if he threw it out or not. I haven't seen it since then, but I don't go through his things. If he's going to keep romantic gifts, they should at least not be mixed in with my stuff.
This is the same girlfriend that caused us to break up (indirectly) in our first year of dating because he still loved her and I was more invested in our relationship than he was. I snooped a little on his FB and they're still friends. It doesn't help that she's more attractive and successful and doesn't have a big cesarean scar across her perfect stomach. We're also moving back to the state she lives in.
In all fairness, I have one present from an ex. It's a necklace that I never wear. But he was also my best friend and he died in a really traumatic car accident. I don't think it's the same thing.
TL;DR: | My husband has romantic gifts from an ex girlfriend that meant a lot to him. Am I justified in being upset? Should I bring it up with him? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [25F] mother [61F] seems to be experiencing some memory loss. How should I approach this?
POST: Lately I [25F] have noticed my 61 year old (62 in October) Mother's memory seems to be slipping. She tells me the same stories over and over every time I see her, shows me the same YouTube videos multiple times in just a few days, and just today she told me a story I had told her just 2 days ago but said her coworker told her.
I'm worried she's on her way to Alzheimer's. Maybe I'm just jumping the gun and it's regular "getting older memory loss" but I'm worried because it seems to be getting worse in the last year.
How do I bring up her seeing a doctor about it?
I know she will get defensive or maybe even offended, but I'd rather catch it early if it is something to be concerned about. It's worth noting that my Mom is definitely not fond of getting older and that she always lives by "you're only as old as you feel" so I don't want to upset her by bringing up something that happens to older people.
TL;DR: | Mother exhibiting signs of memory loss. Worried about early onset Alzheimer's. How do I approach the subject without upsetting her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22F] have not been wanting to have sex with my [23M] boyfriend. Totally in love, totally want to do it, but just not feeling it.
POST: I [22F] have been with my [23M] boyfriend for almost 5 years. We've had other partners, we're very comfortable with each other, and very happy. Lately, however, I haven't wanted sex. I want it, but I feel almost too lazy to have it. Hard to describe. Here's some things going on right now
-He's working full-time for the first time now in 3 years
-I'm looking for work again after re-locating for school
-We are long distance now and have been for 3 months, but see each other every weekend (live about 40 minutes apart)
-I'm a little overwhelmed with school and finding work (possible reason)
Anyways, any advice would be great on maybe how to get back into the swing of things if you know what I mean ;) I hope I'm not weird. We're still very much in love but I think I'm just a little overwhelmed. Comments and/or advice? Please? :)
TL;DR: | 5 year relationship with boyfriend going great, just not wanting sex much lately (on my part). Want to fix it :) |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Under what circumstances will medical insurance cover any orthodontic treatment?
POST: I've been in agonizing pain for the better part of the last two weeks. I finally got into a local dentist office and had the necessary xrays taken. I have a severely impacted canine tooth that never erupted and is currently putting a gross amount of pressure on the nearby incisor.
I have a pretty basic dental and health insurance plan, but neither cover orthodontics in patients older than 15 years old. I'm 21 years old.
At this point I don't believe that the necessary orthodontic treatment would be considered cosmetic due to the dramatic cross bite and impacted canine. I'm in a lot of pain and I don't know what to do
From what I've seen on dental/orthodontic forums, the treatment for this issue lasts ~8 months-~2 years and costs upwards of $3,000. I'm in college and my family is considered low income.
What can I do to finance this procedure? Are there grants? Fee deductions? Anything at all would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR: | Impacted canine in need of extraction and placement via braces. Dental and medical insurance won't cover any of it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [F18] birthday is coming up and I'm not sure how to celebrate it with friend [M18]
POST: I'm not a girl with many friends and my parents know it so they've planned my birthday "party" as just the three of us but I'd love to spend the day with my best friend that lives across town.
I don't want to upset my parents by saying that I'd rather spend the day with just this friend or bring him along in a awkward lunch with the three of us (where an absurd ammount of questions about our relationship would be brought up that I really don't want to discuss)... I really don't have any other friends like him and probably none that would actually accept my invitation.
How should I proceed?
TL;DR: | My birthday is coming up and I'd love to spend it with my only friend (soon to be boyfriend) but my parents have other plans. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Young redditors please help me! I have zero friends because I'm behind with the times. What do I need to get my social life back? [16m]
POST: I started in a high school where I knew nobody and because of my introverted nature, my social life was an epic fail; socially my life has gone downhill since middle school. So now I've moved again to a different school (I'm starting 11th grade) and can't let myself down again. It really hurts to be lonely for so long. I like to think I'm a nice guy but people eventually lost interest in me because we don't have much in common - this is a recurring issue. I think I know what guys my age are into: from observation the most common topics seem to be XBOX, sports and girls of course. I just have so little experience in these areas.
**A LITTLE BACKGROUND:** I had no father figure which arguably explains why I'm terrible at playing most sports and my lack of interest in sports in general. We didn't have much money so I was almost never up to date with the latest consoles, latest phones and whatnot. The temporary father I had was abusive which only augmented my insecurity and self esteem issues. I get therapy now which is helpful but no middle aged lady truly understands the current teenage world enough to help me properly. I deleted my facebook last year because it was a constant reminder of how I have no friends. The few friends that I had were too far away to keep up with so we drifted apart naturally.
So I've been working and saving up all summer and I have enough to buy myself stuff (from ebay though lol) to get with the times. But since I haven't had any proper friends in a long time, I don't know what I should get. I'm assuming it will be easier for me to make a comeback this way than to teach myself how to play sports. I know my personality and mindset need to be worked on too but my therapist is helping with that. But if I have Xbox live or whatever, I will share similar interests with guys my age FOR ONCE and this will give me a huge head start in getting my social life back. I just need help getting started.
TL;DR: | – I have no friends but I'm starting afresh in a new school. Tell me what to do/buy to get my social life back. I need as much details as possible because I'm very behind with the times!! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23F] with my girlfriend [22F] 2.5 years, still love her but feeling like our relationship has turned stale
POST: I've been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years now (we've lived together for about a year).
I've been having constant thoughts of breaking it off for a few months now, but I can never justify it enough to myself. I still love her, we never fight, our sex life is good, but I just feel so bored with our relationship and I can't see myself spending the rest of my life with her (she definitely does with me, talking about buying a house and getting married already... Maybe that's what scares me :/)
To make matters worse I've been starting to develop a (I hate the word but it describes what I'm feeling) crush on a girl I've been friends with for years. I would never cheat on my girlfriend, but I can't stop thinking about the other girl.
I don't think I could live with the guilt if I broke up with her, it would destroy her! Also I would appreciate any insights into how to handle breaking up with someone you live with... I just can't see how it wouldn't be a horrible experience :S
TL;DR: | feeling bored in 2.5 year relationship, still love her but can't see myself spending my life with her... What do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19 M] with my Girlfriend [ 21 F] of 1 year , am I being unreasonable thinking she does not appreciate what I do for her?
POST: So basically earlier today I ran into this situation with my girlfriend where she has this other female friend ( that she calls her "wife" They're pretty close friends ) and she commented on the fact that everytime her friend greets her , she will say hi love and my girlfriend said " I get this everyday from her , it's so nice " on a really happy tone. That alone doesn't bother me , what bothers me is , I say this to her everyday and not once am I being told I appreciate this or even get a warm welcoming also , more often than not if I say good morning my love , il be greeted by a pretty dull "Hi" which is kind of shity to be honest , but on the other hand when she greets her friend it's always a very nice welcoming . So after she commented on this , I told her " what do you mean , I tell you this everyday and I don't get that type of appreciation for it , or even any recognition for that matter " .
She then proceeded to be upset at me because she thought it was silly of me to act this way because she thought I was upset because another woman was being nice to her , basically she saw it more as jealousy rather than me simply wanting a tiny bit of recognition or simply something better than a boring hi after I've given you a lengthy warm welcoming . Don't get me wrong here, I don't only say these things just to get a warm welcoming back , but it's nice to know you're appreciated once in a while , I guess the problem could also stems from the fact that my girlfriend rarely if ever says thank you to anything I actually do for her , but anytime anyone but me does something for her she will make sure to be thankful and let them know where as sometimes I feel she just takes for granted the fact that as a boyfriend I should be doing these things for some reason :/
TL;DR: | Girlfriend seems to be showing alot of appreciation for whatever other people do for her , but for me she just seems to be taking it for granted, am I being unresonable to think that? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU with cheese
POST: This actually happened today.
A little backstory: So ever since I was a little kid, I was only ever allowed to eat minimal amounts of cheese. Doctors said that I couldn't eat any at all, because it would cause extreme constipation. However, since cheese is a gift from God, I ignore the restriction, allowing me to build up a low tolerance for cheese.
I'm sure where you all see this is going…
I went to a bridal shower today and had a margherita sandwich, which of course has a plentiful amount of mozzarella. That was probably my limit for cheese, but I also had a salad with cheese sprinkled on top. For dinner I had another salad with cheese in it.
One hour later, I'm driving with my family to pick up some furniture we bought online when I feel hell bubbling up in my stomach. I yell at my family to get off the freeway and to the nearest store… I spent an hour in a target bathroom, alternating between shit storms, loud echo-y farts, and vomit. My mom waited in the bathroom for me and alternated between saying comforting things like "just relax it'll be okay" and frustrated things like "Jesus Christ this is nightmare. Make sure you flush a lot", all of which were loud enough for everyone in the bathroom to hear (if they could even hear over my shitting and farting)
Now I'm back home with my ass glued to the toilet for another hour and counting. Wish me luck reddit
TL;DR: | can't have too much cheese but did anyways. Hours of shitting, farting, and vomiting with public embarrassment from my mom |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 22f in 6.5 year relationship with 22m, not sure if breaking up is the answer.. bi curious/one-sided relationship
POST: I am a 22f in a 6.5 year relationship with 22m, met in high school, went to college together, graduating in May. I guess I went into the relationship with some reservations about it, but then things got better, we got super close and have been best friends ever since.
Several times I have contemplated and even attempted breaking up with him over the years but never felt ready for that. Freshman year of college (3yrs ago) we broke up for about 1.5 months. I hooked up with several other guys (no sex though), and then we got back together when we were both home for winter break and things have been SO MUCH better since.
However, a lingering doubt about the relationship remains. We have talked about marriage and kids (all things I really want in my 20s) but recently I've been acknowledging a bi curiosity that I have always had, but kept suppressed. Also, our sex life can feel one-sided where he is super attracted to me and always very in to physical intimacy but I frequently don't feel the same intensity back. We have had really great sex, but then we have also experienced "failure" in the bedroom, which I feel comes from my lack of "spark" for him. When I go out I feel attracted to and interested in other men, but I would never cheat.
He is my best friend, an amazing boyfriend, so supportive and would make an incredible husband and father. I am afraid of losing such an awesome person/my best friend of 6+ years and I feel guilty for not feeling as committed to the relationship as I should/as he is.. but these doubts keep springing up every now and then. Help! Are these just symptoms of being in a long term relationship? What should I do?
TL;DR: | Sometimes doubt if I should stay with amazing bf of 6.5 years because of bi curiosity and sometimes lack of interest. Not sure if symptoms of long term relationship or means I should break up. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: Reunited and it feels so shitty
POST: If I can't tell reddit then I don't know who I can tell.
I'll try to spice of my semi-depressed state with a little bit of wit. Here goes: The girl who I lost my virginity to, the girl who I clearly still have lingering feelings for is currently sitting on left of me in a college split double on the adjacent side of me, the side my prospective roommate is supposed to be living in. But he's not here yet because I got here earlier than him. I let her stay here on his side until she gets her shit together and switches her major, because if she doesn't switch, she has decided she doesn't want to enroll in the major she's currently in. So basically what I'm doing right now is hearing a video chat between the girl with a bunch of different people on the internet who she may or may not know, because thats the way she is. She's self-proclaimed socially awkward, yet she can meet people in some way shape or form and it seems as if I can't at all. For some reason I'm not connecting the way I originally did and it feels like a cop out, as if what I expected didn't reach its expectations. I'm the type of person who can't leap into things suddenly so I've designated time for all of this to work out, but theres a strong smog in the air thats telling me things won't work themselves out. I feel like shutting her computer screen and going for it out of the furry of hearing her talk to someone miles and miles away about how she just got a dick pic from some fucker back where she lives. I should be the one having a stimulating conversation with her because I'm actually here, yet I'm in a catatonic state of cluelessness. I'm at a stalemate, I might totally self destruct and run out of my own room. Any sort of response welcome, this is my way of saying I'm open to ANY advice.
TL;DR: | I'm sexually repressed, and godamn I'm distressed, I don't take it out it in a normal way, but I don't talk about it and keep it at bay. |
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