gowitheflow/parallel-talks-deduplicated · Datasets at Hugging Face

english stringlengths 2 3.06k	non_english stringlengths 1 2.84k	language stringclasses 52 values
And so I thought, you know what, this is the career for me, because I am interested in some messy topics.	Então pensei, quer saber, esta é a carreira para mim, porque estou interessada em tópicos confusos.	en-pt-br
But I want to be able to make them not messy.	ولی می خواهم قادر باشم، آنها را از آشفتگی در بیاورم. می خواهم آنها را درک کنم.	en-fa
I want to hack into these things that I know are important and lay the code out for everyone to see.	Voglio entrare dentro queste cose che so che sono importanti e svelare il codice affinché tutti possano vederle.	en-it
So where I started was with connection.	بۆیە لەکوێوە دستم پێکرد پەیوەندی هەبوو	en-ku
Because, by the time you're a social worker for 10 years, what you realize is that connection is why we're here.	Protože, pokud jste sociálním pracovníkem už 10 let, tak si uvědomíte, že spojení je to, proč jsme tady.	en-cs
It's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.	É o que dá sentido e significado à nossa vida.	en-pt
This is what it's all about.	Štai kas tai yra.	en-lt
It doesn't matter whether you talk to people who work in social justice, mental health and abuse and neglect, what we know is that connection, the ability to feel connected, is -- neurobiologically that's how we're wired -- it's why we're here.	Nije bitno da li razgovarate sa ljudima koji rade u odseku za pravdu i mentalno zdravlje, zlostavljanje i zanemarivanje, ono što znamo je da veze, sposobnost da se osećate povezanima je - neurobiološki smo tako povezani - zbog toga smo ovde.	en-sr
So I thought, you know what, I'm going to start with connection.	그래서 저는 '연결'에서부터 제 연구를 시작하기로 결심했습니다.	en-ko
Well, you know that situation where you get an evaluation from your boss, and she tells you 37 things that you do really awesome, and one "opportunity for growth?"	Jūs jau zināt situāciju, kad jūs saņemat vērtējumu no jūsu priekšnieka, un viņa pateiks jums 37 lietas, kuras jūs veicat patiešām lieliski, un vienu lietu -- kurā ir "iespējama izaugsme"?	en-lv
(Laughter) And all you can think about is that opportunity for growth, right?	(हंसी) और आप एक ही बात सोच रहे होते हैं कि सुधार, कहे का	en-hi
Well, apparently this is the way my work went as well, because, when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak.	Anlaşılan o ki, işte benim çalışmam da böyle oldu çünkü insanlara sevgi hakkında soru sorduğunuzda size aşk acılarını anlatırlar.	en-tr
When you ask people about belonging, they'll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded.	Waktu anda bertanya tentang peranan mereka mereka akan berbicara tentang pengalaman terburuk mereka ketika mereka dikucilkan.	en-id
And when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection.	A kada pitate ljude o vezama, priče koje su mi govorili bile su o nepovezanosti.	en-sr
So very quickly -- really about six weeks into this research -- I ran into this unnamed thing that absolutely unraveled connection in a way that I didn't understand or had never seen.	لذا بسرعة -- حوالى ستة أسابيع فى هذا البحث بالفعل -- توصلت إلى هذا الشيء الذى بلا إسم الذى كشف بالتأكيد عن التواصل بطريقة لم أكن أفهمها ولم أرها أبداً من قبل.	en-ar
And so I pulled back out of the research and thought, I need to figure out what this is.	Så jag tog ett steg tillbaka från forskningen Och tänkte, jag måste komma underfund med vad det här är för något	en-sv
And it turned out to be shame.	Και κατέληξε να είναι η ντροπή.	en-el
And shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection: Is there something about me that, if other people know it or see it, that I won't be worthy of connection?	Ruşinea e uşor de privit ca teama de rupere a relaţiei. „E ceva legat de mine, pe care dacă l-ar şti sau vedea oamenii, nu voi mai fi demnă de o relaţie cu ei.”	en-ro
The things I can tell you about it: It's universal; we all have it.	我要告诉你们的是：这种现象很普遍；我们都会有（这种想法）。没有体验过耻辱的人	en-zh-cn
The only people who don't experience shame have no capacity for human empathy or connection.	없는 사람만 수치심을 경험하지 않죠. 수치심에 대해 말하는 것을 좋아하는 사람은 없지만	en-ko
No one wants to talk about it, and the less you talk about it, the more you have it.	Niko ne želi da govori o tome, a što manje o tome govorimo, to je ono sve prisutnije.	en-sr
What underpinned this shame, this "I'm not good enough," -- which, we all know that feeling: "I'm not blank enough. I'm not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, promoted enough."	この恥という感情つまり自分は十分じゃないと思う誰もが知る感情のことですが具体的には完璧じゃないスリムじゃない金持ちじゃない美しくない偉くないとかそんなことです	en-ja
The thing that underpinned this was excruciating vulnerability.	В основе стыда лежит сильнейшая уязвимость,	en-ru
This idea of, in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.	tá myšlienka, že aby sme mohli vytvoriť vzťah, musíme dovoliť, aby nás ten druhý videl, aby videl hlboko do nás.	en-sk
And you know how I feel about vulnerability. I hate vulnerability.	І ви знаєте, як я ставлюсь до вразливості - я ненавиджу вразливість.	en-uk
And so I thought, this is my chance to beat it back with my measuring stick.	Więc pomyślałam: to jest moja szansa, aby odeprzeć to moim kijkiem do mierzenia.	en-pl
I'm going in, I'm going to figure this stuff out, I'm going to spend a year, I'm going to totally deconstruct shame, I'm going to understand how vulnerability works, and I'm going to outsmart it.	เป็นไงเป็นกัน ฉันจะต้องเข้าใจมันให้ได้ ฉันจะใช้เวลาหนึ่งปี เพื่อวิเคราะห์ชำแหละความละอาย จะทำความเข้าใจว่า ความเปราะบางทางใจ ทำงานอย่างไร และฉันจะเอาชนะมัน	en-th
So I was ready, and I was really excited.	Ero pronta e davvero gasata.	en-it
As you know, it's not going to turn out well.	Comme vous vous en doutez, ça ne s'est pas bien passé. (Rires)	en-fr
(Laughter) You know this.	Już to wiecie.	en-pl
So, I could tell you a lot about shame, but I'd have to borrow everyone else's time.	Έτσι θα μπορούσα να σας πω πολλά σχετικά με τη ντροπή, αλλά θα έπρεπε να δανειστώ το χρόνο όλων των υπολοίπων.	en-el
But here's what I can tell you that it boils down to -- and this may be one of the most important things that I've ever learned in the decade of doing this research.	Ama bunun nereye gittiğini söyleyebilirim - ve bu, bu araştırmayı yaptığım 10 yıl boyunca öğrendiğim en önemli şeylerden biri olabilir.	en-tr
My one year turned into six years: Thousands of stories, hundreds of long interviews, focus groups.	عامي الأول تحول إلى ستة أعوام، الآف من القصص، مئات من المقابلات، مجموعات نقاش.	en-ar
At one point, people were sending me journal pages and sending me their stories -- thousands of pieces of data in six years.	فى نقطة معينة كان الناس يرسلون صفحات من يومياتهم ويرسلون لى قصصهم -- الآلاف من قطع المعلومات فى ستة أعوام.	en-ar
And I kind of got a handle on it.	Dan saya merasa bisa mengatasinya. Saya merasa paham, apa rasa malu itu sebenarnya,	en-id
I kind of understood, this is what shame is, this is how it works.	вака функционира.	en-mk
I wrote a book, I published a theory, but something was not okay -- and what it was is that, if I roughly took the people I interviewed and divided them into people who really have a sense of worthiness -- that's what this comes down to, a sense of worthiness -- they have a strong sense of love and belonging -- and folks who struggle for it, and folks who are always wondering if they're good enough.	Napisala sam knjigu, objavila teoriju, ali nešto nije bilo ok - ako grubo podelim ljude koje sam intervjuisala na grupu koja zaista razume osećaj vrednosti - na to se na kraju svodi, osećaj vrednosti - imaju jak osećaj ljubavi i pripadnosti - i na grupu ljudi koji se sa tim bore, koji se uvek pitaju da li su dovoljno dobri.	en-sr
There was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging and the people who really struggle for it.	Había sólo una variable que los separaba de las personas con un sentido fuerte de amor y pertenencia. Las personas con un sentido fuerte	en-es
And that was, the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they're worthy of love and belonging.	Cei care simt puternic iubirea şi ataşamentul cred că sunt demni să le primească.	en-ro
That's it.	In to je to.	en-sl
They believe they're worthy.	Wierzą, że są tego warci.	en-pl
And to me, the hard part of the one thing that keeps us out of connection is our fear that we're not worthy of connection, was something that, personally and professionally, I felt like I needed to understand better.	И за мене, тешкиот дел од она нешто кое што нè спречува да бидеме поврзани е нашиот страв дека не сме вредни за врска, беше нешто што, лично и професионално, чувствував дека треба да го разберам подобро.	en-mk
So what I did is I took all of the interviews where I saw worthiness, where I saw people living that way, and just looked at those.	لذلك ما فعلته هو أن أخذت كل المقابلات حيث وجدت إستحقاق ، حيث رأيت الناس يعيشون بهذه الطريقة ، ونظرت لهؤلاء .	en-ar
What do these people have in common?	מה יש לאנשים האלה במשותף?	en-he
I have a slight office supply addiction, but that's another talk.	من یک اعتیاد جزئی به لوازم اداری دارم، ولی آن بحث دیگری است.	en-fa
So I had a manila folder, and I had a Sharpie, and I was like, what am I going to call this research?	Држев картонска папка и маркер, и се прашував, како да го наречам ова истражување?	en-mk
And the first words that came to my mind were "whole-hearted."	As primeiras palavras que me vieram à cabeça foram "amor incondicional".	en-pt
These are whole-hearted people, living from this deep sense of worthiness.	이들은 자신이 가치있다는 깊은 신념을 가지고 전심전력하며 사는 사람들이죠.	en-ko
So I wrote at the top of the manila folder, and I started looking at the data.	Jadi saya cantumkan kata itu di map manilanya, dan saya mulai memroses data yang ada. Mula-mula	en-id
In fact, I did it first in a four-day, very intensive data analysis, where I went back, pulled the interviews, the stories, pulled the incidents.	katër ditë analizim intensiv të dhënash, ku iu ktheva gjithçkaje që kisha, nxorra intervistat, nxorra historitë, të gjitha rastet.	en-sq
What's the theme? What's the pattern?	Was ist das Thema? Was ist das Muster?	en-de
My husband left town with the kids because I always go into this Jackson Pollock crazy thing, where I'm just writing and in my researcher mode.	我老公帶孩子出遠門因為我整個廢寢忘食我狂寫資料進入我"研究員模式"	en-zh-tw
And so here's what I found.	E eis o que encontrei.	en-pt
What they had in common was a sense of courage.	Αυτό που είχαν κοινό ήταν η αίσθηση του θάρρους.	en-el
And I want to separate courage and bravery for you for a minute.	Ik wil eerst even onderscheid maken tussen moed en dapperheid.	en-nl
Courage, the original definition of courage, when it first came into the English language -- it's from the Latin word "cor," meaning "heart" -- and the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.	करेज, करेज की मूल परिभाषा जब ये शब्द पहली बार अँग्रेजी भाषा में आया -- यह लेटिन शब्द कर से है, जिसका अर्थ है दिल -- और मूल परिभाषा थी आप कौन हैं इसकी कहानी अपने पूरे दिल दे सुनना	en-hi
And so these folks had, very simply, the courage to be imperfect.	所以这些人就具有勇气承认自己不完美。	en-zh-cn
They had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others, because, as it turns out, we can't practice compassion with other people if we can't treat ourselves kindly.	Ils avaient la compassion nécessaire pour être gentils, tout d'abord avec eux-mêmes, puis avec les autres, car, à ce qu'il semble, nous ne pouvons faire preuve de compassion envers les autres si nous sommes incapables d'être gentils envers nous-même.	en-fr
And the last was they had connection, and -- this was the hard part -- as a result of authenticity, they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do that for connection.	Ve sonuncu olarak bağlantıya sahiptiler, ve - en zor kısmı buydu - sahiciliğin sonucu olarak, kendileri olabilmek için olmaları düşündükleri kişi olmaktan vazgeçmeye hazırdılar. bırakmaya hazırdılar, ki bağlantı için kesinlikle bunu yapmak zorundasınız.	en-tr
The other thing that they had in common was this: They fully embraced vulnerability.	Kitas dalykas, kuris buvo jiems bendras, buvo štai kas. Jie nevengė būti pažeidžiami, silpni.	en-lt
They believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful.	Sie glaubten ihre Verletzlichkeit machte das Schöne an ihnen aus.	en-de
They didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor did they really talk about it being excruciating -- as I had heard it earlier in the shame interviewing.	הם לא דיברו על פגיעות כאל דבר נוח, אך גם לא דיברו עליו כאל דבר מייסר -- כמו שיכולתי למצוא קודם לכן בראיונות הבושה. הם פשוט דיברו על זה כאל הכרח.	en-he
They talked about the willingness to say, "I love you" first ...	De pratade om villigheten att säga "jag är älskar dig" först,	en-sv
the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees ...	despre disponibilitatea de a face ceva când nu ai nicio garanţie,	en-ro
the willingness to breathe through waiting for the doctor to call after your mammogram.	ئارەزوو بۆ هەناسەدان لەکاتی چاوەڕوانی پەیوەندی دکتۆر دا لەدوای تیشکە سەروو بنەوشەییەکە	en-ku
They're willing to invest in a relationship that may or may not work out.	Byli skłonni inwestować w związek, które mogą, ale nie muszą się udać.	en-pl
They thought this was fundamental.	Ze dachten dat dat fundamenteel was.	en-nl
I personally thought it was betrayal.	Ja som si myslela, že je to zrada.	en-sk
I could not believe I had pledged allegiance to research, where our job -- you know, the definition of research is to control and predict, to study phenomena for the explicit reason to control and predict.	İnanamıyordum, araştırma yapmaya bağlılık yemini etmiştim - araştırmanın tanımı belirli bir nedeni kontrol ve öngörme için, kontrol etme ve öngörme, fenomen üzerinde çalışmadır.	en-tr
And now my mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live is with vulnerability and to stop controlling and predicting.	Dhe tani misioni im për të kontrolluar e parashikuar me nxorri para syve përgjigjen që mënyra më e mirë për të jetuar është me cënueshmëri, dhe jo duke kontrolluar dhe parashikuar.	en-sq
This led to a little breakdown -- (Laughter) -- which actually looked more like this.	Isto levou-me a um pequeno esgotamento... (Risos) ... que, na verdade, se parecia mais com isto.	en-pt
(Laughter) And it did.	（笑声）它确实是。	en-zh-cn
I call it a breakdown; my therapist calls it a spiritual awakening.	Ben sinirsel çöküş dedim, terapistim ruhani bir aydınlanma dedi.	en-tr
(Laughter) A spiritual awakening sounds better than breakdown, but I assure you, it was a breakdown.	灵魂的觉醒当然比精神崩溃要好听很多，但我跟你说那的确是精神崩溃。然后我不得不暂且把数据放一边，去求助心理医生。	en-zh-cn
And I had to put my data away and go find a therapist.	Ļaujiet man jums ko teikt: jūs zināt, kas jūs esat,	en-lv
Let me tell you something: you know who you are when you call your friends and say, "I think I need to see somebody.	когда звонишь друзьям и говоришь: "Я думаю, мне надо сходить к кое-кому на приём. Можешь кого-нибудь посоветовать?"	en-ru
Because about five of my friends were like, "Wooo, I wouldn't want to be your therapist."	因为我大约有五个朋友这么回答： ”喔。我可不想当你的心理医生。“	en-zh-cn
(Laughter) I was like, "What does that mean?"	(웃음) 그래서 제가 "그게 무슨 말이니?"	en-ko
And they're like, "I'm just saying, you know.	وكانوا مثل ، " أنا أقول فحسب .	en-ar
Don't bring your measuring stick."	Ale nie przynoś ze sobą swojego kijka do mierzenia."	en-pl
(Laughter) I was like, "Okay."	Atsakiau: "Gerai".	en-lt
So I found a therapist.	Úgyhogy találtam egy pszichiátert.	en-hu
My first meeting with her, Diana -- I brought in my list of the way the whole-hearted live, and I sat down.	Моята първа среща с нея, Диана, занесох своя списък с начина, по който живееха всеотдайните хора и седнах.	en-bg
And she said, "How are you?"	O ji paklausė: "Kaip jaučiatės?"	en-lt
And I said, "I'm great. I'm okay."	In odgovorila sem: "Dobro sem. V redu sem."	en-sl
She said, "What's going on?"	او گفت "موضوع چیست؟"	en-fa
And this is a therapist who sees therapists, because we have to go to those, because their B.S. meters are good.	Tani, unë jam një terapiste që shkon te terapisti, se dhe ne na duhet të shkojmë te terapisti, se na pëlqejnë dënglat e tyre.	en-sq
(Laughter) And so I said, "Here's the thing, I'm struggling."	(หัวเราะ) ฉันเลยบอกว่า "คืออย่างนี้ค่ะ ฉันมีปัญหาใหญ่"	en-th
And she said, "What's the struggle?"	她說：「掙扎什麼？」我說：「我跟脆弱槓上了」	en-zh-tw
And I know that vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.	Och jag vet att sårbarhet är kärnan hos skam och rädsla och vår kamp för värdighet, men det verkar även som att det är födelseplatsen för lycka, för kreativitet för tillhörighet, för kärlek.	en-sv
And I think I have a problem, and I need some help."	Και νομίζω ότι έχω ένα πρόβλημα, και χρειάζομαι κάποια βοήθεια.''	en-el
And I said, "But here's the thing: no family stuff, no childhood shit."	"Megjithatë" - i thashë - "mos më hap biseda për familjen, fëmijërinë, e kësi dënglash."	en-sq
(Laughter) "I just need some strategies."	(צחוק) "אני רק זקוקה לכמה אסטרטגיות".	en-he
(Laughter) (Applause) Thank you.	(Śmiech) (Brawa) Dziękuję	en-pl
So she goes like this.	И тя започва така.	en-bg
(Laughter) And then I said, "It's bad, right?"	(Risas) "Está mal ¿verdad?"	en-es
And she said, "It's neither good nor bad."	Och hon svarade: – Det är varken bra eller dåligt	en-sv
(Laughter) "It just is what it is."	（笑声） “它本身就是这样。”	en-zh-cn
And I said, "Oh my God, this is going to suck."	A já si řekla," Panebože, tohle bude děs."	en-cs
(Laughter) And it did, and it didn't.	(Cười lớn) Và nó đúng thế thật, và cũng không phải thế thật.	en-vi

And so I thought, you know what, this is the career for me, because I am interested in some messy topics.

Então pensei, quer saber, esta é a carreira para mim, porque estou interessada em tópicos confusos.

en-pt-br

But I want to be able to make them not messy.

ولی می خواهم قادر باشم، آنها را از آشفتگی در بیاورم. می خواهم آنها را درک کنم.

en-fa

I want to hack into these things that I know are important and lay the code out for everyone to see.

Voglio entrare dentro queste cose che so che sono importanti e svelare il codice affinché tutti possano vederle.

en-it

So where I started was with connection.

بۆیە لەکوێوە دستم پێکرد پەیوەندی هەبوو

en-ku

Because, by the time you're a social worker for 10 years, what you realize is that connection is why we're here.

Protože, pokud jste sociálním pracovníkem už 10 let, tak si uvědomíte, že spojení je to, proč jsme tady.

en-cs

It's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.

É o que dá sentido e significado à nossa vida.

en-pt

This is what it's all about.

Štai kas tai yra.

en-lt

It doesn't matter whether you talk to people who work in social justice, mental health and abuse and neglect, what we know is that connection, the ability to feel connected, is -- neurobiologically that's how we're wired -- it's why we're here.

Nije bitno da li razgovarate sa ljudima koji rade u odseku za pravdu i mentalno zdravlje, zlostavljanje i zanemarivanje, ono što znamo je da veze, sposobnost da se osećate povezanima je - neurobiološki smo tako povezani - zbog toga smo ovde.

en-sr

So I thought, you know what, I'm going to start with connection.

그래서 저는 '연결'에서부터 제 연구를 시작하기로 결심했습니다.

en-ko

Well, you know that situation where you get an evaluation from your boss, and she tells you 37 things that you do really awesome, and one "opportunity for growth?"

Jūs jau zināt situāciju, kad jūs saņemat vērtējumu no jūsu priekšnieka, un viņa pateiks jums 37 lietas, kuras jūs veicat patiešām lieliski, un vienu lietu -- kurā ir "iespējama izaugsme"?

en-lv

(Laughter) And all you can think about is that opportunity for growth, right?

(हंसी) और आप एक ही बात सोच रहे होते हैं कि सुधार, कहे का

en-hi

Well, apparently this is the way my work went as well, because, when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak.

Anlaşılan o ki, işte benim çalışmam da böyle oldu çünkü insanlara sevgi hakkında soru sorduğunuzda size aşk acılarını anlatırlar.

en-tr

When you ask people about belonging, they'll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded.

Waktu anda bertanya tentang peranan mereka mereka akan berbicara tentang pengalaman terburuk mereka ketika mereka dikucilkan.

en-id

And when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection.

A kada pitate ljude o vezama, priče koje su mi govorili bile su o nepovezanosti.

en-sr

So very quickly -- really about six weeks into this research -- I ran into this unnamed thing that absolutely unraveled connection in a way that I didn't understand or had never seen.

لذا بسرعة -- حوالى ستة أسابيع فى هذا البحث بالفعل -- توصلت إلى هذا الشيء الذى بلا إسم الذى كشف بالتأكيد عن التواصل بطريقة لم أكن أفهمها ولم أرها أبداً من قبل.

en-ar

And so I pulled back out of the research and thought, I need to figure out what this is.

Så jag tog ett steg tillbaka från forskningen Och tänkte, jag måste komma underfund med vad det här är för något

en-sv

And it turned out to be shame.

Και κατέληξε να είναι η ντροπή.

en-el

And shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection: Is there something about me that, if other people know it or see it, that I won't be worthy of connection?

Ruşinea e uşor de privit ca teama de rupere a relaţiei. „E ceva legat de mine, pe care dacă l-ar şti sau vedea oamenii, nu voi mai fi demnă de o relaţie cu ei.”

en-ro

The things I can tell you about it: It's universal; we all have it.

我要告诉你们的是：这种现象很普遍；我们都会有（这种想法）。没有体验过耻辱的人

en-zh-cn

The only people who don't experience shame have no capacity for human empathy or connection.

없는 사람만 수치심을 경험하지 않죠. 수치심에 대해 말하는 것을 좋아하는 사람은 없지만

en-ko

No one wants to talk about it, and the less you talk about it, the more you have it.

Niko ne želi da govori o tome, a što manje o tome govorimo, to je ono sve prisutnije.

en-sr

What underpinned this shame, this "I'm not good enough," -- which, we all know that feeling: "I'm not blank enough. I'm not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, promoted enough."

この恥という感情つまり自分は十分じゃないと思う誰もが知る感情のことですが具体的には完璧じゃないスリムじゃない金持ちじゃない美しくない偉くないとかそんなことです

en-ja

The thing that underpinned this was excruciating vulnerability.

В основе стыда лежит сильнейшая уязвимость,

en-ru

This idea of, in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.

tá myšlienka, že aby sme mohli vytvoriť vzťah, musíme dovoliť, aby nás ten druhý videl, aby videl hlboko do nás.

en-sk

And you know how I feel about vulnerability. I hate vulnerability.

І ви знаєте, як я ставлюсь до вразливості - я ненавиджу вразливість.

en-uk

And so I thought, this is my chance to beat it back with my measuring stick.

Więc pomyślałam: to jest moja szansa, aby odeprzeć to moim kijkiem do mierzenia.

en-pl

I'm going in, I'm going to figure this stuff out, I'm going to spend a year, I'm going to totally deconstruct shame, I'm going to understand how vulnerability works, and I'm going to outsmart it.

เป็นไงเป็นกัน ฉันจะต้องเข้าใจมันให้ได้ ฉันจะใช้เวลาหนึ่งปี เพื่อวิเคราะห์ชำแหละความละอาย จะทำความเข้าใจว่า ความเปราะบางทางใจ ทำงานอย่างไร และฉันจะเอาชนะมัน

en-th

So I was ready, and I was really excited.

Ero pronta e davvero gasata.

en-it

As you know, it's not going to turn out well.

Comme vous vous en doutez, ça ne s'est pas bien passé. (Rires)

en-fr

(Laughter) You know this.

Już to wiecie.

en-pl

So, I could tell you a lot about shame, but I'd have to borrow everyone else's time.

Έτσι θα μπορούσα να σας πω πολλά σχετικά με τη ντροπή, αλλά θα έπρεπε να δανειστώ το χρόνο όλων των υπολοίπων.

en-el

But here's what I can tell you that it boils down to -- and this may be one of the most important things that I've ever learned in the decade of doing this research.

Ama bunun nereye gittiğini söyleyebilirim - ve bu, bu araştırmayı yaptığım 10 yıl boyunca öğrendiğim en önemli şeylerden biri olabilir.

en-tr

My one year turned into six years: Thousands of stories, hundreds of long interviews, focus groups.

عامي الأول تحول إلى ستة أعوام، الآف من القصص، مئات من المقابلات، مجموعات نقاش.

en-ar

At one point, people were sending me journal pages and sending me their stories -- thousands of pieces of data in six years.

فى نقطة معينة كان الناس يرسلون صفحات من يومياتهم ويرسلون لى قصصهم -- الآلاف من قطع المعلومات فى ستة أعوام.

en-ar

And I kind of got a handle on it.

Dan saya merasa bisa mengatasinya. Saya merasa paham, apa rasa malu itu sebenarnya,

en-id

I kind of understood, this is what shame is, this is how it works.

вака функционира.

en-mk

I wrote a book, I published a theory, but something was not okay -- and what it was is that, if I roughly took the people I interviewed and divided them into people who really have a sense of worthiness -- that's what this comes down to, a sense of worthiness -- they have a strong sense of love and belonging -- and folks who struggle for it, and folks who are always wondering if they're good enough.

Napisala sam knjigu, objavila teoriju, ali nešto nije bilo ok - ako grubo podelim ljude koje sam intervjuisala na grupu koja zaista razume osećaj vrednosti - na to se na kraju svodi, osećaj vrednosti - imaju jak osećaj ljubavi i pripadnosti - i na grupu ljudi koji se sa tim bore, koji se uvek pitaju da li su dovoljno dobri.

en-sr

There was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging and the people who really struggle for it.

Había sólo una variable que los separaba de las personas con un sentido fuerte de amor y pertenencia. Las personas con un sentido fuerte

en-es

And that was, the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they're worthy of love and belonging.

Cei care simt puternic iubirea şi ataşamentul cred că sunt demni să le primească.

en-ro

That's it.

In to je to.

en-sl

They believe they're worthy.

Wierzą, że są tego warci.

en-pl

And to me, the hard part of the one thing that keeps us out of connection is our fear that we're not worthy of connection, was something that, personally and professionally, I felt like I needed to understand better.

И за мене, тешкиот дел од она нешто кое што нè спречува да бидеме поврзани е нашиот страв дека не сме вредни за врска, беше нешто што, лично и професионално, чувствував дека треба да го разберам подобро.

en-mk

So what I did is I took all of the interviews where I saw worthiness, where I saw people living that way, and just looked at those.

لذلك ما فعلته هو أن أخذت كل المقابلات حيث وجدت إستحقاق ، حيث رأيت الناس يعيشون بهذه الطريقة ، ونظرت لهؤلاء .

en-ar

What do these people have in common?

מה יש לאנשים האלה במשותף?

en-he

I have a slight office supply addiction, but that's another talk.

من یک اعتیاد جزئی به لوازم اداری دارم، ولی آن بحث دیگری است.

en-fa

So I had a manila folder, and I had a Sharpie, and I was like, what am I going to call this research?

Држев картонска папка и маркер, и се прашував, како да го наречам ова истражување?

en-mk

And the first words that came to my mind were "whole-hearted."

As primeiras palavras que me vieram à cabeça foram "amor incondicional".

en-pt

These are whole-hearted people, living from this deep sense of worthiness.

이들은 자신이 가치있다는 깊은 신념을 가지고 전심전력하며 사는 사람들이죠.

en-ko

So I wrote at the top of the manila folder, and I started looking at the data.

Jadi saya cantumkan kata itu di map manilanya, dan saya mulai memroses data yang ada. Mula-mula

en-id

In fact, I did it first in a four-day, very intensive data analysis, where I went back, pulled the interviews, the stories, pulled the incidents.

katër ditë analizim intensiv të dhënash, ku iu ktheva gjithçkaje që kisha, nxorra intervistat, nxorra historitë, të gjitha rastet.

en-sq

What's the theme? What's the pattern?

Was ist das Thema? Was ist das Muster?

en-de

My husband left town with the kids because I always go into this Jackson Pollock crazy thing, where I'm just writing and in my researcher mode.

我老公帶孩子出遠門因為我整個廢寢忘食我狂寫資料進入我"研究員模式"

en-zh-tw

And so here's what I found.

E eis o que encontrei.

en-pt

What they had in common was a sense of courage.

Αυτό που είχαν κοινό ήταν η αίσθηση του θάρρους.

en-el

And I want to separate courage and bravery for you for a minute.

Ik wil eerst even onderscheid maken tussen moed en dapperheid.

en-nl

Courage, the original definition of courage, when it first came into the English language -- it's from the Latin word "cor," meaning "heart" -- and the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.

करेज, करेज की मूल परिभाषा जब ये शब्द पहली बार अँग्रेजी भाषा में आया -- यह लेटिन शब्द कर से है, जिसका अर्थ है दिल -- और मूल परिभाषा थी आप कौन हैं इसकी कहानी अपने पूरे दिल दे सुनना

en-hi

And so these folks had, very simply, the courage to be imperfect.

所以这些人就具有勇气承认自己不完美。

en-zh-cn

They had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others, because, as it turns out, we can't practice compassion with other people if we can't treat ourselves kindly.

Ils avaient la compassion nécessaire pour être gentils, tout d'abord avec eux-mêmes, puis avec les autres, car, à ce qu'il semble, nous ne pouvons faire preuve de compassion envers les autres si nous sommes incapables d'être gentils envers nous-même.

en-fr

And the last was they had connection, and -- this was the hard part -- as a result of authenticity, they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do that for connection.

Ve sonuncu olarak bağlantıya sahiptiler, ve - en zor kısmı buydu - sahiciliğin sonucu olarak, kendileri olabilmek için olmaları düşündükleri kişi olmaktan vazgeçmeye hazırdılar. bırakmaya hazırdılar, ki bağlantı için kesinlikle bunu yapmak zorundasınız.

en-tr

The other thing that they had in common was this: They fully embraced vulnerability.

Kitas dalykas, kuris buvo jiems bendras, buvo štai kas. Jie nevengė būti pažeidžiami, silpni.

en-lt

They believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful.

Sie glaubten ihre Verletzlichkeit machte das Schöne an ihnen aus.

en-de

They didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor did they really talk about it being excruciating -- as I had heard it earlier in the shame interviewing.

הם לא דיברו על פגיעות כאל דבר נוח, אך גם לא דיברו עליו כאל דבר מייסר -- כמו שיכולתי למצוא קודם לכן בראיונות הבושה. הם פשוט דיברו על זה כאל הכרח.

en-he

They talked about the willingness to say, "I love you" first ...

De pratade om villigheten att säga "jag är älskar dig" först,

en-sv

the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees ...

despre disponibilitatea de a face ceva când nu ai nicio garanţie,

en-ro

the willingness to breathe through waiting for the doctor to call after your mammogram.

ئارەزوو بۆ هەناسەدان لەکاتی چاوەڕوانی پەیوەندی دکتۆر دا لەدوای تیشکە سەروو بنەوشەییەکە

en-ku

They're willing to invest in a relationship that may or may not work out.

Byli skłonni inwestować w związek, które mogą, ale nie muszą się udać.

en-pl

They thought this was fundamental.

Ze dachten dat dat fundamenteel was.

en-nl

I personally thought it was betrayal.

Ja som si myslela, že je to zrada.

en-sk

I could not believe I had pledged allegiance to research, where our job -- you know, the definition of research is to control and predict, to study phenomena for the explicit reason to control and predict.

İnanamıyordum, araştırma yapmaya bağlılık yemini etmiştim - araştırmanın tanımı belirli bir nedeni kontrol ve öngörme için, kontrol etme ve öngörme, fenomen üzerinde çalışmadır.

en-tr

And now my mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live is with vulnerability and to stop controlling and predicting.

Dhe tani misioni im për të kontrolluar e parashikuar me nxorri para syve përgjigjen që mënyra më e mirë për të jetuar është me cënueshmëri, dhe jo duke kontrolluar dhe parashikuar.

en-sq

This led to a little breakdown -- (Laughter) -- which actually looked more like this.

Isto levou-me a um pequeno esgotamento... (Risos) ... que, na verdade, se parecia mais com isto.

en-pt

(Laughter) And it did.

（笑声）它确实是。

en-zh-cn

I call it a breakdown; my therapist calls it a spiritual awakening.

Ben sinirsel çöküş dedim, terapistim ruhani bir aydınlanma dedi.

en-tr

(Laughter) A spiritual awakening sounds better than breakdown, but I assure you, it was a breakdown.

灵魂的觉醒当然比精神崩溃要好听很多，但我跟你说那的确是精神崩溃。然后我不得不暂且把数据放一边，去求助心理医生。

en-zh-cn

And I had to put my data away and go find a therapist.

Ļaujiet man jums ko teikt: jūs zināt, kas jūs esat,

en-lv

Let me tell you something: you know who you are when you call your friends and say, "I think I need to see somebody.

когда звонишь друзьям и говоришь: "Я думаю, мне надо сходить к кое-кому на приём. Можешь кого-нибудь посоветовать?"

en-ru

Because about five of my friends were like, "Wooo, I wouldn't want to be your therapist."

因为我大约有五个朋友这么回答： ”喔。我可不想当你的心理医生。“

en-zh-cn

(Laughter) I was like, "What does that mean?"

(웃음) 그래서 제가 "그게 무슨 말이니?"

en-ko

And they're like, "I'm just saying, you know.

وكانوا مثل ، " أنا أقول فحسب .

en-ar

Don't bring your measuring stick."

Ale nie przynoś ze sobą swojego kijka do mierzenia."

en-pl

(Laughter) I was like, "Okay."

Atsakiau: "Gerai".

en-lt

So I found a therapist.

Úgyhogy találtam egy pszichiátert.

en-hu

My first meeting with her, Diana -- I brought in my list of the way the whole-hearted live, and I sat down.

Моята първа среща с нея, Диана, занесох своя списък с начина, по който живееха всеотдайните хора и седнах.

en-bg

And she said, "How are you?"

O ji paklausė: "Kaip jaučiatės?"

en-lt

And I said, "I'm great. I'm okay."

In odgovorila sem: "Dobro sem. V redu sem."

en-sl

She said, "What's going on?"

او گفت "موضوع چیست؟"

en-fa

And this is a therapist who sees therapists, because we have to go to those, because their B.S. meters are good.

Tani, unë jam një terapiste që shkon te terapisti, se dhe ne na duhet të shkojmë te terapisti, se na pëlqejnë dënglat e tyre.

en-sq

(Laughter) And so I said, "Here's the thing, I'm struggling."

(หัวเราะ) ฉันเลยบอกว่า "คืออย่างนี้ค่ะ ฉันมีปัญหาใหญ่"

en-th

And she said, "What's the struggle?"

她說：「掙扎什麼？」我說：「我跟脆弱槓上了」

en-zh-tw

And I know that vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.

Och jag vet att sårbarhet är kärnan hos skam och rädsla och vår kamp för värdighet, men det verkar även som att det är födelseplatsen för lycka, för kreativitet för tillhörighet, för kärlek.

en-sv

And I think I have a problem, and I need some help."

Και νομίζω ότι έχω ένα πρόβλημα, και χρειάζομαι κάποια βοήθεια.''

en-el

And I said, "But here's the thing: no family stuff, no childhood shit."

"Megjithatë" - i thashë - "mos më hap biseda për familjen, fëmijërinë, e kësi dënglash."

en-sq

(Laughter) "I just need some strategies."

(צחוק) "אני רק זקוקה לכמה אסטרטגיות".

en-he

(Laughter) (Applause) Thank you.

(Śmiech) (Brawa) Dziękuję

en-pl

So she goes like this.

И тя започва така.

en-bg

(Laughter) And then I said, "It's bad, right?"

(Risas) "Está mal ¿verdad?"

en-es

And she said, "It's neither good nor bad."

Och hon svarade: – Det är varken bra eller dåligt

en-sv

(Laughter) "It just is what it is."

（笑声） “它本身就是这样。”

en-zh-cn

And I said, "Oh my God, this is going to suck."

A já si řekla," Panebože, tohle bude děs."

en-cs

(Laughter) And it did, and it didn't.

(Cười lớn) Và nó đúng thế thật, và cũng không phải thế thật.

en-vi