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t3_lpixe | AskReddit | What happens to bullets when you fire them wildly in the air? | Now, it's been a while since I've studied Physics or mechanics... But if you were to fire some celebratory rounds (for example, having just overthrown a dictator... or finding out that your first cousin isn't pregnant with your baby) do you not run the risk of being showered with bullets returning back towards the ground?
From a model point of view with no other forces beyond gravity affecting the bullet beyond the initial velocity, if the shot was fired directly upwards, gravity would decelerate the bullet to v=0, where it would then turn and drop, eventually landing where you are stood, with a velocity equal to which it was fired... Either this, or I'd settle for "they magically disappear" | Surely shooting gunshots wildly into the air will mean they drop back to earth, spraying everyone around you like a Romans 12:19 drive-by. |
t3_157je0 | BreakUps | Call my EX-GF? Apologize for saying something I said nasty to her 2 months? Should I Call or not? | So my ex-g/f and I broke up around 2 months ago. Compatibility issues and such. I was staying at her place (it was a two bedroom type of deal with common space) rooms after we broke up for about a week and a half (I know terrible move) I found a place the next day. We broke up pretty clean both crying and all that. No hard feelings etc.
I was pretty quiet to her that week and didn't say much. I was looking for an apartment.
Now the week I was there She comes in my room and says she wants to be honest with me. Three days after we broke up she had been out several times and told me she had already been on two dates. I was kind of mad that she seemed like it was nothing that we dated for 5 months I didn't talk to her after she said that. Fast Forward to a week and a half in I am attempting to sleeping and hear noises coming from her room I assume her new guy is banging her. Seems disrespectful to me that I told her I'm looking for an apartment. i don't see her for a couple of days and I wanted to speak with her. So I did a BETA AS FUCK THING. I posted a note on her door The note basically says that she shouldn't touch my food, or anything. I have in the house and neither should her friends or new boyfriend. It was immature I admit. She sees the note in the morning and is furious.
Basically we have an argument and I call her a whore and basically trash some of her friends (she's said one her friends doesn't really have a spine to her boyfriend and I compared her to that) many times which felt amazing at the time, but now I realize is a bad judgement move (or was it?) She's about 450 miles away from me now and I have been thinking of calling her and apologizing for that situation. My question is would it be a good idea to call her and apologize the way I went about it? I haven't talked to her since that day. | Girlfriend & I broke up 2 months ago. Had a fight. I feel immature because I called her a whore. Now I have the urge to call and apologize. SHOULD I? or Leave it Be? |
t3_1mqpcy | relationships | I [21/F] know it's impossible with [26/M], need help with positive perspective/getting over. | So about a month ago I (21/f) met this guy (26/m). We got on good quickly and started dating - despite the fact that in October I am moving from Europe to the US for 2 years.
We've talked about this, LDR is out of the picture, he doesn't want that kind of commitment. We're just using our last time together to have as much of a good time as we can, then we'll see what happens - possibly stay online friends, but definitly not 'be together'.
I know he's right - it wouldn't work out, and chances are it wouldn't have worked out in the long run if I had stayed here either.
So now I'm moving away in less than two weeks and I have this awful separation anxiety. He's been so good to me and I haven't felt like this for a long time. Rationally, I know this is all for the best and I'm going to get a new life over there and whatnot, but emotionally I'm devastated right now.
I need help on how to cope with this, how to reframe it so even my emotions can agree. It's really just an issue of getting over a crush I don't know all that well anyway, but I haven't felt like this since my teens so I really don't know any good ways to deal with it.
Love all of ya guys. | Got a short time relationship/fling/crush before moving abroad. Aware it's not gonna work out. Need ideas on how to get over emotional devastation. |
t3_3qn2y1 | tifu | TIFU by checking what the object in my shoe was... with my hand... | I should preface this with where I live. I live in New Hampshire. There is nothing scary here. Nothing poisonous. I never have to check ANYTHING before tossing it on.
This morning I was in a rush out the door to go pick up my son, so I grabbed my shoe and slid my food in. At the end of the shoe my toe hit something squishy...
"The cat must have been playing with one of my sons socks or something and it ended up in my shoe." A typical occurrence when you have a cat and a 3 year old.
Not this time.
I reached in to grab whatever it was I had wedged into the toe of my shoe and immediately felt pain in my finger. Along with my finger jettisoning out of the shoe came a field mouse. Attached.
I killed the thing and cleaned up the bloody finger...
I guess had crammed my foot into the poor thing and it had nowhere to go. So when I reached into the shoe... Yeah.
So here's to hoping I don't have rabies or the bubonic plague. | Reached into my shoe to take out a sock stuffed in the end by my cat. Was bitten by a mouse. He is now dead. RIP. |
t3_hxoxy | AskReddit | Can someone explain or analyze my "recurring" nightmare/dream? | Over the past year I've had 3 dreams that have all ended in a very similar, rather unsettling fashion. I will detail each one below:
First Dream: "I was in my moms kitchen talking to a couple of friends about generic topics and it was all very normal and didnt feel much like a dream. After a while they both walked out and left me alone. After a few seconds I cast my gaze downward and saw a little boy crouched underneath my moms breakfast counter he had corpse-like skin that was fairly grey/blue. I was paralyzed with fear and automatically started screaming and warping/falling backwards until i woke up"
Second Dream: "I don't remember as much detail from this one, but I ended up standing on the landing at my moms house just outside her bedroom. She was downstairs with my sister and I needed to grab a pillow from her room. I walked in and I saw a fully grown woman crouched on the alcove space above her bed, again I became paralyzed with fear, screamed and did the whole warping/falling back thing"
The most recent one happened last night. It differed a bit from the other two but was very similar.
"I was in my house with my fiancee and our son was asleep in bed. My sister was also with us and went upstairs to check on him. She had been gone a while so we went up after her (the layout of our house was a bit different to what it actually is) When I got up there I said something to my fiancee that didnt make sense, and this would normally result in her saying DUUUHHHH, which 'she' did, but it wasnt her, it came from behind me, so i turned around and saw a girl behind me, for a few seconds I thought it was my sister, but when I looked at her face it was some random girl I have never seen before. Again I was paralyzed, screamed and fell back."
The dreams never have any sense of horror within them but as soon as I see these people who shouldn't be there I am filled with a HUGE sense of dread even though two of these people didn't talk, and the only one that did didn't exactly say anything bad. | I keep having dreams where people appear where they shouldn't. I get paralyzed, scream and start falling until i wake up.. it's scary |
t3_2ttadi | relationships | Me [26/F] with my Love [24/M] finally a decent person to date after abusive situation? | Hello. So I was in an abusive relationship [m/29] for almost 4 years. Out of the relationship I feel I walked away a much changed and enlightened person? Also I have a daughter now.
So I finally got the guts to leave, moved onto my moms couch for a few months. Ex tries to make everything as difficult as possible (delievering my things to my moms driveway at midnight in the rain... Where they would surely be stolen because he literally just put my stuff in the driveway.) won't watch our daughter to keep me from going to work. Continued to call me names and tell me what a PoS I am etc.
So I manage to go on some dates and sleep around a little.(I'm human and rebounding- Sue me) Then I met someone online, not gonna lie I was expecting it to be a strictly sexy situation but it was almost instant connection. It's crazy, so many shared interests, same sex preferences, same sense of humor and so much more. We just clicked. He feels the same way too and I feel weird all the time thinking "is this what relationships are supposed to be like? Fun!?" (Been officially dating about a month now.)
My problem lies in, I can't help but worry in the back of my mind that things are going to go to hell like with my ex. I seriously freak myself out thinking about it. How do I stop and fully move on? I've spoke to him about how I feel and how nervous I get when I start thinking about everything. He's very nice and supportive about it all. He's amazing with my daughter and I'm really hoping I've found someone worth being with.
But what if... | Left abusive 4yr relationship, found new boyfriend after a while and thing seem too good to be true and it freaks me out. |
t3_2hnzv4 | relationships | Me [18F] with my boyfriend [18 M] was talking the other day and today.... | So my boyfriend (18M) and I (18F) were in my car talking about the past. Great I know..): I know i fucked up in the past and I wish I would of never done it. I wish with all of my heart<3 I would of never done any of it. You ask what I cheated on him twice.): and when I was on a college visit I told him I wanted to take a break so I could focus on school. So to continue we were driving around and he told me he wanted to talk.
THE TALK----> When we were driving around he was talking about the past which I HATE but I know we should kinda talk about it. He told me when I was on the college visit and we were taking a break he told me that he started talking to another girl. Of course I got upset. I also told him that telling me that made me feel like shit. But it is best to talk about how we feel then just to keep it in. So while talking we talked about other stuff and then I started asking him questions. One is that "If he had any feelings for anyone else but me?" his smart comment back was "Betty White" smart I know. He told me that he didn't have feelings for anyone but me and her. HAHA.(: I trust him with my heart but hearing that makes me upset. | How my boyfriend told me he started talking to another girl while on a break made me upset.): |
t3_peojk | self | After 12 years of friendship I have decided to end it. | So I have been best friends with this girl since high school. She was the first person I met at a new school in a town I had just moved to. We hit it off and became friends and became inseparable.
We would discuss relationships and wingman each other and we built a great friendship on mutual trust and respect.
About 4 years ago I started to develop feelings for this girl. I told her how I felt and nothing ever came of it but we remained close friends. But now it has gotten to the point where I need to move on and the only way I think I can do that is by ending this friendship we have had for 12 years.
This is one of the hardest decisions I have ever made because despite my feelings she is still a great friend. I think its time for me to become emotionally available to other women and move on.
I am not sure if it is wise to throw away a friendship like this when I have so few close friends to begin with but I think it is necessary for me to move on and try and forget this girl. | Oh god not another friendzone post, but I am actively trying to move on and better myself in the process and any advice or experiences you would like to share would be much appreciated. |
t3_1o0nju | relationship_advice | My (23f) boyfriend (27m) said something really nasty to me and even though he apologized, I still keep thinking about it. | We've been going out for a little over 2 years and we've always been happy. Lately the sex has been lacking but we've both just been so tired. I work two jobs and go to school. He works minimum 50 hours a week and has a 45 minute commute. So we're both busy.
I essentially live at his house. I adore his roommate and she and I are friends. Well (and this is going to sound nuts) the other night I farted really loud in bed. I grew up with my dad and my brother and farting was never a big deal. I think it's funny, and yes I do realize this is immature but come on, farting is fucking hilarious.
I was talking to his roommate about it and laughing and I guess in his mind we were making fun of him in a way. Then the roommate jokingly said "you're so nasty hahaha..." Then he chimes in and says "and this is why we don't have sex anymore."
I looked up from my homework and was hoping that he would be laughing like he just made a joke (albeit a bad one). Nope. He was totally serious.
I just said "that was mean." I packed up my homework and was about to head into the bedroom to process what I just heard and he grabbed my arm (relax, it was gently, not in any way forceful) and had me sit on his lap.
He explained that the two of us joking like that embarrassed him and made him upset; that he was sorry for what he said and that he didn't mean for it to come out that way.
I believe him. I don't think he meant to be as cruel as he was. He had never said anything like this before.
So we talked it out and apologized. I love him and this isn't going to end us but I keep replaying that moment in my mind and it just hurts. I really don't want to dwell on what was a one time thing. | boyfriend fucked up, apologized, but I can't get it off my mind. |
t3_r22zx | AskReddit | I was denied constitutional rights by a principal what legal actions can i takeagainst him? | I was debating wether i should post here or in trees, but my day friday started awesome. i bought a fat eighth with two beutiful nugs and put it in my book bag like your average highschooler. people started getting busted and inevitbly, after my dealer and several friends got busted, i did. This is where the question really comes into play, i was in his office and he said "i can smell it and there is no color in your face so hand it over." i said, like an intelegent american who knows his rights, i plead the fifth he then said i could either hand over the weed or he would call the school resource officer and have this made a legal issue, which i am pretty sure he can't do. i continued to practice my 5th amendment right and he threatend to cal the nurse for a full body cavity search. and then he began to call the school cop to make this a full possesion charge that would be on record if i ever wanted a job, so i gave up and handed him my beutiful babies (who i really miss by the way). now i am suspended and realized he stomped on alot of my rights what can i do? | i got caught with pot and my pricipal violated my constitutional rights and threatened an illegal strip search can i fight him and hold him accountable for his actions? |
t3_1pt6jq | personalfinance | Short Term Savings Plan | My wife and I are hoping to buy some property about 2 or 3 years from now. We have a decent amount of savings. If I thought we wouldn't buy property for 10-15 years, I'd invest it. As it is, I just want to offset interest as much as possible in the short term.
Here's our situation:
**Savings** - ~$100k
**Yearly income** - ~100k (I am a freelance writer, so it varies a lot)
**Saving Rate** - We try for an average of 5k/month
We're both a little over 30. She's an academic, and for job-related reasons, we won't be able to put down money on a house for 2-3 years, whether we want to or not.
We would like to purchase a house in the range of 350k to 550k. We are looking to buy a place to live in for many years, so ideally I'd like to be able to put down on a place in the upper range. We would basically like to make the largest downpayment possible in order to avoid the somewhat staggering cost of mortgage interest.
So, with all that in mind, my basic question is this - what's the least dumb place to stash our savings for 2-3 years, so we don't get too hurt by inflation? | What's the best place to save money for 3 years before making a major home-buying purchase. |
t3_2nwght | relationships | How do I (21f) tell my boyfriend (22m) of 2 months that I was assaulted last year? | Hi reddit, sorry for any mistakes, I'm on mobile. For the past couple of months, I've been dating a guy that I met online. He's sweet, smart, funny and very caring. We even traded "I love you's" for the first time a couple days ago. But I have some baggage and I'm not sure if its too soon to tell him. I was raped about a year ago by a guy I went on a date with. It wasn't particularly violent or anything but I was pretty drunk and not sure of what was happening at the time. I've been in therapy for it and am pretty much over it. I don't get flashbacks or nightmares really but sometimes I get upset during sex (usually if I've been drinking, but sometimes otherwise.) Hes a bit...large so i think that might be a factor. If it ever hurts or anything i just get reminded of it. The first time we had sex I ended up crying because it hurt. A couple of times since, it would hurt and I'd kind of freeze up instead of saying anything, and he'd stop and ask if I was alright. I would just get kind of embarrassed and upset. I could tell that he was worried about me but I'd just say that I don't feel well or something.
I think he feels as if he's doing something wrong and I don't want to have him feel that way. I feel bad because its not him at all but I feel too awkward to tell him the truth. But its only happened a few times, and other than that sex has been pretty good. I'm just not sure how I should go about telling him about it. I almost did one of the times that I cried but he was already worried and I didn't want to make it worse.
Should i tell him? How do i go about this? I cant imagine pulling him aside and being like "guess what" but i don't think it would make great pillow talk either. Any advice would be really appreciated | dating an awesome guy. Not sure how to tell him I got raped a year ago. |
t3_440x4p | college | 26 y/o consumer banker with no degree - Is college worth it? | Greetings all,
I am a 26 year-old consumer/retail banker with no degree. I've been in consumer banking for a little over a year, and I make about $40,000 a year in the Denver, Colorado area.
I'm considering attending an accredited online school through Colorado State University to eventually earn a bachelor's degree in Economics.
I feel a bit apprehensive about the idea of going back to school this late in the game. Do you think that employers will question my 8 year absence from school, even after I eventually earn this degree? My goal is to become a financial analyst with a small investment operation. (I understand that my chances are nonexistant for any of the NY giants, including Goldman Sachs and so on.)
The reason I'm considering online classes is because the government is not offering anything in terms of financial aid, aside from student loans of course. (Household income of $60,000 annually) Online classes seem to be the best way to maintain full-time employment while finishing my degree, unless there is an alternative that I am unaware of.
Any advice would be extremely helpful. | Need better paying, more fulfilling job in finance. Is a degree going to be worth it for considering the cost and time commitment? |
t3_1px2h5 | weddingplanning | Family friends offering to be our photographer | Hello all! I've only been engaged for a month or so, and I've already run into a problem that is stressing me out.
I have a family friend that does photography as a hobby. She is okay at it, but she does not have much experience with anything other than still life photos. She took our family photos this year for free since she is super close friends with my mom. I got engaged the day before family photos, so she took a few of me and my fiancé for fun. They turned out just okay, and some of them aren't even centered. (There are a few where parts of my fiancé were cut out of the photo.) She offered to photograph my wedding for free, but after looking at her photos (and weddings she has photographed), I really do not feel comfortable having her photograph the wedding.
If that wasn't enough stress, my fiancé's best man's aunt also does photography as a hobby. She think she is a professional photographer, but honestly, her pictures are horrible. They are all edited with instagram filters and are just not flattering. She has also offered to be our photographer.
So now I have to tell two people that I do not want them as my photographer. I have already used the line "You're our family and we want you to be able to enjoy the day" but both have brought up the subject many, many times. They don't know each other so I don't think "We don't want to hurt either of your feelings" would work as an excuse. They'd probably both just want to photograph it together.
What would you all say? I don't want to hurt their feelings because they are both being very kind in offering their services, but photography is probably the one thing I will splurge on for the wedding. | How do I turn down family friends who think they are professional photographers? |
t3_3d0x8p | tifu | TIFU by having a girlfriend who set off my apartment building's fire alarms. | So, this happened about twenty minutes ago:
I was sound asleep until the piercing klaxon of the fire alarm in my building woke me up (I sleep in my boxers, this is important for later). My girlfriend rushed into the bedroom and said it was her fault, as she was steaming her work shirt using the shower (by closing the door with the ventilation off and just running it as hot as possible for a while). However, when she opened the door to turn off the shower, the heat set off the fire alarm (which also happens to be very close to the bathroom door), which also sets off every alarm in the building as they are connected. There are about 80 units in my building.
She ran in to tell me she was sorry, that it was her fault, etc. I always like being on the safe side, just in case it was coincidental when she did that and there was a *real fire* -- so I threw on my bath robe (I didn't tie it, this is the fuck up) and we quickly evacuated the building. When we got outside, it felt a little breezy, for some reason. There were about 100 people (many of them women and children) outside including the firefighters and **ALL** of them were looking at me, some of them laughing. Turns out, the button flap on my boxers was open and my dong was hanging out. I covered up and ran inside about as fast as I ran outside. | My girlfriend probably set off the fire alarm in my apartment building and because of that, many people (including women, children and my city's firefighters) saw my dong. Embarrassment ensued. |
t3_3fumcq | offmychest | I think I'm just broken... | I don't know if I'm doing anything right. My car got stolen last week. Still nothing. I missed a job interview. I wasn't going to take it but even to have one after so long felt amazing. I can't drive for uber without it. Which was extra money I desperately needed. But the biggest thing is that now I can't quit my pizza delivery job. I lived off tips week to week. I feel devalued and demoralized. My only value to them is that I wash dishes and speak English. If I drove for uber full time I thought I'd make more money week to week. I'd have more time to pursue other projects. I may have even had a social life again. No more telling friends I start at this time but I don't know when I'll get off. But now that's gone. I apply and apply everywhere but nothing. My chance to try to improve my life stolen from me the day I was going to do it. I've been in a rut so long now. More than a year I've tried to find something better. Sending out resumes and cover letters online almost daily. I went to a career fair hoping for something, anything. Every lead everyone has given me fizzled out. Something where I could cover bills and gas without worry. Something where I wouldn't have to wake up and wonder if I could afford to eat. Something where my mom wouldn't think I'm pathetic and just feeling sorry for myself all the time. For more than a year now just feeling my worth to society just dwindle slowly. Am I just taking up space now? Would anyone really miss me? I just feel like a burden to everyone. My mom, my friends, and every guy I have fallen for just disappears. I had to give up weed for money. Now I can't afford alcohol. I make what little groceries I can afford last weeks. But losing my car, maybe this is a sign I'm not really meant to advance. Maybe this is all I can bring to the table...
I'm sorry for being so whiny. But reddit is maybe the only place I feel most comfortable getting personal. | my car got stolen and now I feel like crap. |
t3_191meb | dating_advice | I (19) asked a girl (19) out twice now. Declined for good (I think) reasons. Should I try one more time in the hopes she would finally say yes? | First time I asked her she declined politely saying that she just wasn't in the mood for men at the moment, and that she would have just been poor company.
From what I could gather, she may have been messed around with by someone else recently, so I let it go and gave her some time to get over it.
A few weeks later, I saw how she was feeling out of genuine interest and tried again. She was feeling much better and was glad to hear from me again, but she was busy that weekend traveling, and wouldn't be back for another week.
She recently got back however and despite being declined, I feel as if there is still a chance. She didn't outright say she wasn't interested, or that she didn't feel the same way, so should I give it one more shot in hopes that nothing gets in the way this time? | I like this girl. Asked her out. She was in a bad state at the time and declined. Asked her out again recently. She was busy that weekend. Should I try one more time? |
t3_rfzpi | AskReddit | What's the best option: community college or online degree (NOT UofP)? | Hi Reddit,
I wanted to get some feedback on my education decision. If anyone out there works in HR or recruiting and can comment (or if someone here has gone down a similar path), that would be great.
I live in Michigan, and I do have a full-time job, but I want to go back to school. I'm 27 years old, and I have a bachelor's degree in Professional and Technical Writing with a Journalism/PR minor from a private university (brick and mortar - I went there). I should've chosen a different major, as I've learned over the last few years working that my degree is NOT what I want to do. I am very interested in doing database administration, but I'm not sure which way to go with it.
Basically, I'm finding that I have two options, based on money, location, and time, since I can't quit my job:
1) I can go to a local community college and get an associate degree in Computer Information Systems with a Systems Analysis or Software Engineering option. This will be the cheaper, quicker option, especially since my bachelor's coursework should cover the majority of the general ed requirements.
2) I can do an online Database Administration degree. I know University of Phoenix is very hated on Reddit, and I've seen some pretty good arguments to corroborate that sentiment. The three options I've stumbled on are [Western Governors University] [Rasmussen College] and [University of Maryland University College] However, I don't know anything about these places and don't know anyone with experience with them.
So, Reddit, would it be wiser for me to go the community college route and get an associate degree on top of my bachelor's, or to get a second bachelor's degree through an online university? I really appreciate any feedback! | University of Phoenix is the Antichrist; are other online universities legit and worthwhile, or should I cut my losses and go back to community college? |
t3_2l0jkh | relationship_advice | Turning down | Hello to everyone, and thank you in advance for responding. I'll need a little help here. So just like many, I've recently met a female friend who is pretty cool and have been hanging out with her since. However, people around know her as having an unpleasant personality. I wouldn't say they judge me for it, but I'll say they are confused as why I do so. She also has this weird tendency to awkwardly follow me around wherever I go. Thing is, I have lately also started to see the "bad" part of her that people talked about. To add to this, she's very sexually active and pretty much always implies she wants sex.
My question is, is there a nice and non dramatic way to say that you do not want sexual relations with someone? In a way that couldn't get even the most intense SJW offended or sad. | Mean girl wants sex, need a nice way to say no and possible cut off connection is necessary |
t3_4agrl5 | relationships | My boyfriend (15M)'s friend (15F) keeps sending me (17F) pictures she takes of him | So my boyfriend has a friend who is in a few of his classes, and I've met her a few times, but I'm not a huge fan of her.
I don't dislike her simply because she is his friend, but because she cheated on my best friend (16F) twice. She is known for messing with relationships, and has admitted several times that she quite likes my boyfriend.
I don't mind that he is friends with her. I personally dislike her, but that is no reason for me to have him end a friendship. It just makes me nervous that he is close to someone known to screw with things for her own gain.
I have expressed my feelings about this to my boyfriend, including how she put my best friend through some really terrible things,but he claims that "It's in the past and we should just get over it. She's not that bad."
Within the past few months, I have received messages and Snapchats of him that she has sent me, and they are often photos of him that he is not aware about.
The most recent time, I brought it up with him later that day, and how it makes me uncomfortable that she is always talking pictures of him. He responded saying that he knows about some of the photos, and he doesn't mind that she is sending them.
It wouldn't bother me if it was anyone else, but the fact that this girl has done things that have had detrimental effects on people close to me makes me nervous.
Am I paranoid? I don't know how to get my point across that her doing this makes me uncomfortable. | friend of my boyfriend who is known for causing trouble keeps sending me photos of him, and I don't know how to address the situation without seeming like overprotective and jealous. |
t3_d6egz | AskReddit | Want to start working out, help! | Hey (amazingly fit and manly) Redditors,
I want to start working out; I've never done anything like this before so I don't know exactly where to begin. I'm starting college in a few weeks which has a gym. However I don't know what regimen I should follow if one at all.
I'm 18 years old, male, 5'11", and 150 pounds. So I'm not doing this to lose weight but to be healthier and maybe gain some muscle. For a few months now I've been trying to eat healthier and cut out sugary drinks.
Any help would be massively appreciated, especially if the advice involves Jennifer Love-Hewitt and dinner plans. | Don't beat me up. |
t3_s0d9a | AskReddit | 29-year old in need of genuine life/love advice | I have never asked Reddit a question, the answers always occured to me before posting. Even now, some of the answers occur to me about the question I am going to ask, but I would appreciate the input of the hive mind in this matter, nonetheless.
I love a woman, we grew up together. My life has been in a rut lately, living with her. We had been together for 11 years, no children, just work and play. I am very socially withdrawn, I dislike people in general and have had no urge to socialize, not even with family. I have goals, I knew I had to get my head straight, get a plan for myself (I didn't see it quite like this at the time). I decided to break up with her, citing petty BS (I know now). After 2 months of hearbreaking loneliness and insane solitude, I figured out what I wanted, and how to get there. Already on it. Unintended side effect- suddenly socially awesome as well. After my epiphany, my new perspective informed me that this woman is virtually perfect, especially for me. A missed opportunity perhaps, but as the man i am now i would make her my wife. I talked to her, it sounded promising, but nothing definite.
My dilemma: I start actually hanging out with friends, socializing, etc. Today I hang out with someone, we have some drinks, get tipsy, I end up sleeping with her. I am not technically still with my former woman, but I do still want to be with her. I made a mistake I never thought I actually COULD make.
This is not the man I want to be, I ask for your honest advice that I may try to mend my faults and proceed with integrity. | 29, Broke up with woman of 11 yrs, realized need her, slept with another woman, don't want to be that guy. |
t3_2k2770 | tifu | TIFU by forgetting to turn peerblock on | I download, a LOT, of anything, music, TV, movies, games, but am (usually) smart about it, private browsing, IP blocking (peerblock and iblocklist) and upload limits of less than 50mb per month; I've done this for the last 3 years with no problem, this week I've been able to download more movies since I have extra free time and downloaded 4+ bootleg titles; when they finished I noticed I didn't have my IP blocker on but eh I've done without it before - until I come back to that email in my inbox for one of the movies I downloaded. TIL remember to be safe when downloading (obviously not going to stop) | forgot to block anti peer to peer tracking IP's, got caught |
t3_2wwdrw | relationships | I [27F] feel as though my relationship with my bf [28 M] is completely centered around our dog... not sure if overreacting. | So, a week ago, my bf of seven years surprised me with a shelter puppy. I am a dogwalker/dogsitter who has been longing for their own dog but my bf (understandably) had concerns about getting a dog (it's a lot of work, as I know firsthand!) but decided finally that he felt ready to share the responsibility with me.
The pup is amazing and very well-behaved. However, a week has gone by and we are pretty much obsessed with this dog. We do nothing but talk about the dog, cuddle with the dog, and... don't have sex because the dog is usually with us on the couch or we're worried about what he's doing.
I know this seems like a dumb/small concern, but I am just a little worried. I can't help but be distracted by what the little guy is doing at all times (to try to see if he's chewing something, going to the bathroom somewhere inappropriate, etc.) and I think my bf is a bit mesmerized too.
Am I overreacting/do any first time pet owners have advice? | New dog means we do nothing but talk about the dog and the dog disrupts our usual activities. Might be overreacting. |
t3_apts9 | AskReddit | Dear Reddit, your social organizing/activism expertise/experience please. Input is greatly appreciated. | Hello,
I have just been appointed a position in a club at my college campus to raise awareness regarding California's shitty budget cuts towards higher education. We're considered a "commuter college" and organizing with rallies sometimes nets us 200-400 student turn out. We do small things like lobbying for local legislators as well as visiting the state capitol. I believe we hit the radical and more "socially acceptable" means to get shit done.
Pushing aside the backstory, I'm interested to know if any redditors have been involved in student activism, grass roots organizing, or any civic engagement experience.
My question, what are some things that you guys do to
a) recruit students
b) raise awareness
c) give incentive for those to stay
d) sustain for future years.
We've done tabling, door to door, classroom presentation, facebook invites, emails, phone banking, dinners, coax ppl out with food, gift cards...We've done a few good things but I would love to hear what people have to say regarding means to appeal to people's emotions and show em this cause that directly affects students. And if you don't agree with this, well, even if you're a tea bagger, what means do you do to appeal to your own interest groups. | experiences as to how to recruit, preserve, and sustain civically/socially active groups. |
t3_n43jl | AskReddit | Who still wears "hipster" glasses? | Ok so this is my very first post so please let me know if I'm doing it wrong . So my question I guess is a really simple & stupid one but can I wear "hipster" glasses, are they still in style. I have seen some people wear them & they always look fantastic in them & it just makes me want to wear those black rimmed sunglasses usually named "ray bands" right? but my problem is, is that I want to wear them without looking ridiculous & I'm wondering if I can even pull them off. Also another problem is that I don't want to be called a "hipster" or anyone think I'm trying to be, see I'm avoiding that haha. I know this is kinda lame question n all but I'm just curious. :) should I upload a pic of myself to show if I can even pull them off or..? | Are hipster glasses in style & can I even pull them off without people thinking im trying too hard. |
t3_tuivt | AskReddit | Does anyone have insights on a sleep schedule to increase number of lucid dreams while maintaining cognitive creativity and a high degree of flexibility in sleep times? | I am considering a new sleep schedule. I have tried the uberman and dymaxion sleep scheadules with little luck and frankly am less excited about them because of the inflexibility in sleep times. Everyman seems like the next logical choice for my goals and I very well might try it. I would be tempted to do something slightly different though and would like reddits input.
Basically I would take as many naps as I damn well please but never let them extend longer than 30 minutes as to force my body to kick into REM sooner. I would take them whenever tired but always make sure I was fully awake again before dipping into the next nap. Hopefully I naturally would not need as much total sleep as my normal 8 hours, but cutting the sleeping hours is not the key aspect. Most importantly I want to be the same happy and creative person as always but have more lucid and otherwise dreams to play with.
Has anyone tried a similar sleep schedule? Would I get the long wave sleep that is needed according to those who are skeptical of the uberman schedule? | Important: Dreams, creativity and day to day different sleep times. Not so Important: Total time sleeping, social obligations and being able to engage in copious amounts of drugs or alcohol. |
t3_1frufg | relationships | Feel as though my boyfriend (22m) and I (19f) of 3 months are already leaving together.. | My boyfriend and I were best-friends for 6 months before we started dating. That being said we were both seeing different people during those months and when both of our relationships ended we became even closer as friends. I would sleep over at his house occasionally when it was too late/tired to drive back. We would never cuddle or really even touch at all when we slept in the same bed. I am not a huge person on cuddling and had been assuming I was friend-zoned at this point so I didn't think anything about it. But after he surprised the hell out of me and asked me out, we now spend every. single. night together. I feel as though we are basically living together even though we switch between our houses every 3 or 4 nights. I am not a morning person and I also go to bed early, which he is the opposite in both ways. I like sleeping next to him and it is convenient a lot of the times but I LOVE sleeping alone because every time someone touches me it is like a bolt of adrenaline. How do I find a balance and communicate to him what I want? | I don't want to spend every night in the same bed as my boyfriend**** ** |
t3_33999n | relationships | My (19M) Ex-GF(18F) Lied About Getting Pregnant | So we started dating the summer of 2014, and broke up February of 2015. She texted me two days ago saying that she got pregnant from last time we had sex (beginning of February).
Along with this she said she had a miscarriage two days prior to texting me. She said she found the week we broke up.
I acknowledge that if this is true, I hold responsibility, and I do feel for her. But there are a few things that make me doubt her.
1. She has a history of being manipulative (Although definitely not to this extent).
2. A few days prior to this she found out that I started dating a new girl
3. When we did have sex (back in February) we used a condom for the whole thing except for the first minute. Along with this I never "finished". So although I know pregnancy is still possible it's a little suspicious.
4. She said she knew for over a month before TEXTING me about it.
I am not sure what to think about the situation. Part of me wants to confront her and the other part just wants me to let it be a keep her out of my life completely. | dated for 7 months, last time we had sex was in February, we used a condom, broke up shortly after. Two days ago she says she was pregnant from then but had a miscarriage earlier in the week. |
t3_16vcex | offmychest | something i seriously need to get off my chest. | this is mostly built up anger at my ex(i think 17 now), okay so, basically our relationship went pretty good for about 6 months, until i caught her cheating on me with some guy she met on 4chan, that she had skype sex with but never met irl... okay sooo What The Fuck was i thinking when i came back the next day to get my things... and then decide to give you a second chance...Why in the living fuck did i set myself up like that... you have no idea what you did to me when YOU broke up with me 3 months later... not only did you completely shut me out, but you spread bullshit rumors about me to everyone..AND didnt have the godamn common courtesy to give me my football jersey back when i asked.... atleast i wasnt the one distributing child porn over skype.. i wouldnt fucking doubt it if youre still doign that shit. have fun with your life cuntface, im glad im better off without you :)
OH i can thank you for one thing though... practice...
4 months after all that im now with the most amazing girl ive ever met,(19m+18f)
have fun being alone and used as a sex object for horny guys online ;)
sorry about this, i seriously needed to vent even though its been quite some time | cunt of an ex dropped me like the 9 months we had together meant nothing, and the fact i gave her a second chance to devastate me really makes me pissed at myself. |
t3_15bqkb | Advice | Advice in regards to my drunkard of a brother? | I don't really know how exactly to word this or what to even ask... The short background is that my brother (21) and myself (19) both still live with our parents while we are going to college. He has suffered with depression and cutting himself and those sorts of things when he was younger. In more recent years he had to drop out of his freshman year of college and move back home because of how much he was drinking. He now likes to get so drunk that he will: start fights at parties, call me to drive him home and then when i get there ask how i knew to show up (he forgot he called in the 20 minutes it took me to get there), get home and break things because he is so drunk he knocks things off the walls, piss on the carpeted floor because he is so drunk he doesn't realize, argue with my mother who is basically paying for everything he needs like room and board and school and his car/gas etc, etc. He has been arrested multiple times for being drunk in public, starting fights, driving drunk, and possession.
I guess where i would want advice is that my mom tries to talk to him and he won't admit that it is a problem or that it affects anyone else. She wants me to talk to him about it but i don't know what to say/do. How can i make him realize that getting to this point of drunkenness where he can't think straight is not the only/best option? Also if anyone has any experience being the drunk person in a situation similar to this that would be helpful. And he has tried AA and Counseling but did not like it and started to skip meetings.
Thank you for reading and any advice. | Brother gets extremely drunk and wont listen to logic even when sober. What can i do to try and show him this isn't necessary and is not good for him. |
t3_2ryzk7 | relationships | I [21M] am in an open relationship with a [19F] girl unwanted be exclusive with. | EDIT: Sorry! The title should read "I [21M] am in an open relationship with a [19F] who I want to be exclusive with." Autocorrect on my phone changed it and I did not catch it.
So this open relationship began in August the beginning of the fall 2014 semester. We have both had or at least what I believe a great time with each other.
Our first date together was wonderful, full of laughter and enjoyment. However, on that date, specifically towards the end, she told me she just broke up with her ex boyfriend of two years, two weeks prior to our date. The reason: because she wanted to have fun and not be in a commitment.
This wasn't exactly what I wanted but I was okay with it. So we continued our relationship openly, without exclusivity. However, her ex is apparently also her best friend and she even told me they've been on and off for a while. Being in an open relationship, I decided I guess I was okay with this too.
Well winter break rolls around, she goes back to her home town and I go back to mine. With school coming back up we both are going to want to see each other, but I've been having second thoughts. It's been apparent she's been seeing her ex over break. I'm not really sure where they stand, but I'm not sure I'm okay with this kind of relationship anymore. It was pretty clear I was/am a rebound, but in all honesty I really like this girl. Not really sure where to move on from here as this isn't what I want anymore.
I'm ecstatic to see her again and I'm sure it will be great but I'm thinking maybe it's time to move on. How am I supposed to compete against her ex whom is also her best friend... | Began an open relationship, caught feelings, she's on and off with her ex, not sure where to move on from here. |
t3_1gg8zx | AskReddit | How do I approach my 12 year old brother about the possibility that if he was raped/molested by a man? | He is the youngest of 4 kids. See, we all have different dads and we dont know my sisters nor his. My mother is keeps at least 1-2 (cheating/bouncing between them) men every 6 months during our childhood. She prioritized her happiness over ours in retrospect really.
So when i found out that one boyfriend of hers (my younger, but oldest brothers father, he is 13) whom as a child i would call my dad, trusted and even loved actually raped my sister the entire time.. from her, only a few months about. I made an awful scene as a broke down into tears and other melodramatics you might expect from a heart broken 22 year old...
It's gotten me thinking, the behaviors of youngest brother was always peculiar. He's always acting out, getting angry, making the most noise and other various signs that may be unrelated. With the countless number of men, I become fearful that something may have happened... | my mother facilitated the rape and molestation of my baby sister for **4 years** and i fear my brothers may have been victims of any number of men. I wish to know if confronting the issue is wise or not.. I'm already too fearful to even imagine it or asking them about it. |
t3_1ayyy7 | relationship_advice | Do I (25/m) tell her (21/f) that I'm actually an overly attached bf? | I love being with my girlfriend (6 months together). If I could I'd spent all my time with her (besides going out with a couple of my old friends once a month or when I'm busy with my hobbies). I want to focus my life around her. I want to be around her 24/7.
I try to hold back, because in my previous relationship it was very suffocating for my ex to be around me all the time. I was too touchy, too present. So I am basically hiding the true me from her because I don't want to ruin this relationship the same way.
I just want to live a life primarily with her: Going out (dinner, movies, zoo etc.), travelling around the world, playing games and what not at home. I want to 'live' in a bubble with her. Sure, she can do her own things. I don't care, I will never actually claim her like that. | Do I tell my girlfriend that I'm the overly attached boyfriend? Or do I try to hide it from her because it's more healthy to give each other some space? |
t3_3z45ie | relationships | Me [32 F] with my 34 [M] boyfriend of 7 months, 1 week after moving in together I know this won't work. How do I end this? | We just moved in together in a city a couple hours away from our hometown to start new jobs. City is expensive and we are in a temporary place but will need to find something more permanent within the next month or two.
I realized that although I enjoy spending time with him, I am 95% certain for a number of reasons (which we've discussed but I've always stupidly minimized to myself and him) I don't want a committed relationship (much less one year lease) with him.
I feel fucking terrible and I have no idea what to do. Yes I should have been honest with him and myself sooner and am an idiot. Yes we should have lived together before moving, but that wasn't really an option as we both got job offers at the same time. | How do I end things as decently/fairly as possible? And when? This will be much more difficult financially for him, as he has no financial safety net and will face more logistical hurdles in finding a new place. |
t3_14h1sd | relationship_advice | It feels like I mean nothing to her anymore. | 5 month relationship, and it's going down the drain. A few things happened where both of us were hurt, and now it seems like she doesn't want to even attempt to go back to the way we were. She doesn't want to break up, but I can't take being a shell of what we once were. We used to talk all day, couldn't wait to see each other. Now I'm lucky if I get a 5 word text every 3 hours. If that. We are in an LDR, but this still belongs here.
I try my hardest not to be bothered by this situation... but it's eating away at me. And she won't even talk about it. I am apparently the love of her life, but it feels like I'm being deceived, or cheated on, with how distant she has become. I am in love with this woman... And I have never felt more pain in my life that I have now. It's almost as if my heart is now half expecting it, from texts being full on ignored for hours (if not altogether), to being her best friend, and now it's like I am simply an acquaintance from work or something. I was going to marry this woman. Now I am so unsure about how she feels, or what's going on, that I feel the need to end this. She won't even talk to me about what she's thinking anymore. She used to when we were good. I miss the woman that I love, so fucking much. It is seriously depressing...
Please, if you guys could offer some advice, or give me some points to think about to help me make a decision... I would really appreciate it. | My girlfriend has become entirely distant but still says she is in love with me. I don't know what to do. |
t3_1iaaq8 | offmychest | Server problems. | I quit my job of three years a month ago to work at a gastropub opening up downtown in a nice hotel. The restaurant is pretty nice with reasonable prices with entrees being anywhere from $16-36 for dinner. Everything is a la carte and everything is made in-house. We offer bottle service and craft cocktails. Our craft cocktails run anywhere from $12-15. A glass of our house wine is $10. If a party of three sits down for dinner and gets one appetizer, three salads, and three entrees, and three drinks, they will easily spend $150+.
Yesterday we had a soft opening for friends and family, only supposed to be around three hours long. I was the second in rotation and I got a "VIP" table of three, which would ultimately end up as a party of eight if you include the baby. The table generally consisted of top people involved in investment of the hotel and their friends/family. I served this table from 5 until 11. I got skipped in the rotation because this table was so needy, and as very important guests, I needed to give them the best service possible. This meant that I only two two other tables. I did, indeed, give them my best service with a smile every time I went to their table. I made sure to be as prompt, courteous, and genial every time I helped them. I made sure they never had an empty glass (seriously, I probably filled their water 40 times.).
Anyway, I served this table three appetizers, three salads, five entrees, six whiskey and sodas, two glasses of red wine, one shot of top shelf tequila, four pints of Stella Artois, three craft cocktails, a coke, an Arnold Palmer, two lemonades, four virgin cocktails, one hot tea, and three coffees. On top of that, my supervisor gave them dessert and four craft cocktails. Around 9:30, the ladies at the table asked for more free dessert so I rustled some up from the kitchen for them. Their tab was ultimately $400, but they got almost $500 worth of stuff. And they got comped. The whole thing. And I got a $6 tip. | Six hours of service. $500 worth of shit. $6 tip. |
t3_39jk7z | relationships | Me [22F] dating controlling possibly dangerous [34M] man | Using a throwaway account since my sister and I share one to lurk and I don't want her to worry. A couple months ago I met a man that's involved with a criminal organization (think 1%) that most people frown upon. Right off the bat he was a little controlling. Calling me all day long, wondering where I'm at, what I'm doing, who I'm with etc. There's a few places he's told me I'm not allowed to go. Always asking if I'm sleeping with another guy and will keep asking after I've said no. Anything he wants, he expects and seems to think he's owed it. I get nothing in return from this relationship. I'm extremely drained. I'm just worried I'll hurt his ego or he'll think I'm disrespecting him and I'll end up in a whole bunch of trouble. How can I get out safety? | Dating controlling scary man, scared to leave |
t3_1k2k00 | cats | K, more advice time? Cat not using litterbox. | Last time, you solved my problem of how to get a ferocious ninja cat to take a pill, so I have high hopes here.
SO. We have six cats. No, we aren't hoarders; now-husband had four, I had one, dad left me one more.
Fuzzy Maine-Coon lookalike cat had bladderstone problems last year, apparently learned that peeing anywhere but a litterbox is cool.
Litterboxes for hub's four are in the garage, Maine is peeing and pooping everywhere. Source: put a webcam out there to find out who.
Got four normal litterboxes and one enclosed out there. (my two stay on the second floor and each has their own that nobody else touches, because my cats are some mean mofos; one rescued off the street at 10 years old, one ferocious ninja cat)
Litterboxes are clean (not perfectly, who the fuck has time to go scoop every time one of four uses one of five boxes? Right now, one poop in one box)
We're worried that this behavior will spread, the other cats will start it too, as they tend to do.
No clue how to deal with it. He's the biggest cat in the house, no other cat messes with him except my psychotic Siamese, who doesn't go downstairs anyway, let alone into the garage. | How to get cat to use litterbox again after illness. Not sick now. |
t3_2158kt | relationships | My [18F] boyfriend's [17M] female best friends makes excuses not to see him. | I've been with my boyfriend for a year and throughout that time, his female best friend always asks for them to meet up. However, every single time they arrange to meet up, she always has an excuse and they don't go out. I must add that she's liked him in the past before and I have a feeling she still has feelings for him now. She says she loves him a lot too, but in a friendly way.
I spoke to my boyfriend and he said she always has an excuse and it's made me wonder why because it's really odd to me. Why do you think she talks to him loads, arranges to meet up, but then has some excuse for not going? My boyfriend even says that he promised her that he'd see her so it's weird how it appears she makes him promise, but then she has an excuse not to see him. | My boyfriend's female best friends always has an excuse for not seeing him but always asks him to go out? She's been doing this for a year now. |
t3_32fag6 | tifu | TIFU by being racist in a restaurant. | Buildup:
Overdue flight which leads to five hours of waiting (in the middle of the night) at the airport. Already sleep deprived since the night before, my wife and I decide to get something to eat or we'll just fall asleep on the floor and miss the plane.
Event:
Sitting and eating some bland overpriced airport food, and to lighten the somewhat silent, tired and weirdly sleep-deprived mood I start doing the first thing I can think of: I imitate a really bad Indian accent.
'I'm going to buy some PAAAAINT. PAINT. PAAAAAAINT.' With the worst Koothrapali accent you can imagine.
My wife looks at me in absolute horror. I look back at her questioningly. My vision pans right to a family of Indians right next to us, eating. | Sleep deprivation messes with you. |
t3_1650fm | offmychest | looking for help/suggestions please | I am a 27 year old guy. I work afternoon/nights. Love my job and coworkers but im tired after work. I usually go home, put on netflix and pass out. I ended up getting out a bit early yesterday (2230) and I wanted to go out. Odd part is that I just didnt know where to go. I feel weird going to a bar or a social place by myself. Tried calling a few friends and none were free. I ended up going home and just doing the same thing. Im not depressed, but I do miss having a gf. Not just the sex but the intimacy and companionship as well. What the fuck can I do? getting kind of desperate... and i hate it
[ | ] Long story short, tired from late nights working, lonely, want to meet women, what do? |
t3_jh7uy | dating_advice | More than Friends... with a Friends Ex? | I'm a 21 Male. Friend is a 21 Female
She went abroad last semester; however we have been keeping up periodically (not that often) with e-mail, fb, and now that shes back in the US with texting.
Basically I've been friends with this girl since, the very first day of college, freshman year. Now I'm a senior and we're returning to school in a little more than a week and I need some advice, since I have two problems.
My first problem is she is sending mixed signals and I don't know if I'm interpreting them wrong, because I have feelings for her. For example, she had been "flirting" with me for most of Junior year, but I thought maybe we we were just doing it for fun. While abroad she started doing stuff like calling me boo (online), liking and commenting on my photos (never did that before, especially saying stuff like "What a Looker".. etc) and stupid stuff like that. We text occasionally right now, she usually initiates because well I'm pretty bad with keeping up with people.
The other day she asked "Tell me, any ladies this summer?" and I said not really. But I mentioned I was interested in a random girl just to look like I was looking around and suddenly she won't stop bothering me about the girl until I gave her a name. Whenever I asked her about her personal life, she always replies sarcastically like, "Oh yeah, you know me!" (she doesn't party/hook-up/date at all, unlike me (during the school year))
My second problem is that my good friend dated her sophomore year for about 2 months and he is still a little sensitive about it even after a 1+ year. During that time I was going out partying and I in fact helped get them together, and tried to help them through the rough patch... We've talked about her before with other guys, but I feel like if I dated her he could go one of two ways, happy or totally ballistic.
Soooo, I know this isn't much to go on, but do you think she likes me? And how do I handle my friend? | Haven't seen a good female friend in a long time (study abroad), sending me mixed signals. She dated my other friend 1+ year ago, he's still sensitive about it. |
t3_hqj1r | AskReddit | Need advice for a trouble-making ex-roommate | My 3 other roommates and I just moved out of a house. Two months before the lease ended one roommate (let's call him "bill") said he couldn't pay the final months rent. We all suggested he go talk to our landlord to work out a payment plan since we were all on the lease and none of us wanted to cover his rent. He made a verbal agreement with the landlord and everyone was good. Until we got our security deposit back minus $1000 in bills we owed AND minus his share of the rent. He never paid the landlord and now we're stuck paying his share of the bills.
A little back history on "bill" he was always really disruptive on weeknights (we all work full-time day jobs- he worked at a pizzeria 3 hours a day)- like coming home at 3am blasting music and smoking in the house. He rarely cleaned up after himself, left illegal drugs out in common areas (I hid them sometimes to mess with him), and never helped out with anything around the house. Before we moved out he got wasted one night when noone was there and ripped down blinds, broke a chair, and did some small damage to a wall.
When I texted him to question him about the missing rent I got back : "you all deserved it after the way you disrespected me" (referring to us being mad at him and talking to him about his actions) "you're lucky not paying the rent was all I did" "it's a small town, I'll see you guys around"
Need advice from fellow redditors. I have the messages saved- do they sound threatening? Should I file a police report?
Is it worth it to take him to small claims court? We'd probably each get back at most $100... If he doesn't countersue. Also- we don't know his new address so no clue where to find him. Please help | scummy old roommate who left us hanging with bills, what do I do? |
t3_1op5dr | relationships | Me [16 M] with my girlfriend [16 F] 5 Months, my girlfriend is clingy and controlling and need advice! | My girlfriend of over five months and I have been fighting a lot recently. The relationship started almost right after we met. It has developed into a typical high school relationship.
I don't have very many friends and dating my girlfriend has made me feel a lot less lonely. She is veery kind and loving yet a little bit crazy. Like I said it is a typical high school relationship and we hang out EVERYDAY.
At first I really enjoyed having someone to spend my time with everyday; in fact I still do. The problem is that even when I need to spend time on things such as chores, homework, and me time, my girlfriend gets jealous and is not understanding.
My girlfriend has become incredibly clingy. I recently informed her that I was going away for thanksgiving break with my family. I told her that I would miss her and only be gone for 3 days. Her first reaction was to offer I spend Thanksgiving break with her and just drive up to my family for Thanksgiving night. I told her that this wouldn't work out because vacations are important to my family and she could not understand this and remained mad at me for the rest of the day.
My girlfriend has also become very controlling. Almost everything has to revolve around her. The only time that I can hangout with my friends is when she tells me she has plans to hangout with one of her friends. She gets mad if my plans aren't done at the same time as hers. She hasn't specifically told me I cannot hangout with my friends, but when I try to, she guilts me into canceling.
I still love my girlfriend, but need help explaining things to her. I want her to be able to know that just because I want to hangout with someone who isn't her, doesn't mean i don't love her. I don't know Reddit, I need your help. Has anyone been in this type of relationship? Should I try and hangout with friends more often so she isn't as dependent on me? Should I get out now? | Girlfriend is clingy and controlling, but want to fix the relationship. |
t3_33lpsp | tifu | TIFU by working hard for college. | This happened 10 minutes ago.
Sooo, we have this marketing project that is due on Saturday.
I started early working on the project but was still in need of more time in the final weeks.
I finished the project today 1:00AM. At 13PM I numbered the pages, fixed some minor mistakes and re-read some stuff.
Searched the house for some nice paper and found some. Thicker than normal paper. It looked very professional because it was a little little bit yellow.. anyways.. I was ready to print dat muthafucka.
The printer software isn't installed on my laptop, so I used my mom's.
Opened the document and hit da damn print button.
Everything works.. but after page 9 I notice that one half of one text is on the wrong page. Opened da doc and saw my mothers writing program (libreoffice fyi) fucked up. Rearranged all texts, threw away the wrongly printed pages and continued printing from page 5...
After I while I check back on the printer.. ran out of paper.. had only 6 pages left but it printed only 18 of 36! can't find any cool paper. I used all of it. fuck.
Genius idea: I print on the back of the pages. Did that.
The master fuck up: I'm 2 page short.
The real fuck up is that if the writing program hadn't messed up the structure I could've used those pages and my idea of printing on the back of dem pages would've worked... daaayuum.
Then I said fuck it and used normal paper. Printer is now half empty. | Tried to print my college project. Ran out of good paper. |
t3_fxhuw | AskReddit | Dear Reddit, should I accept a great job offer in a city I'm unsure about (L.A.)? | About a week ago I received a job offer from a company in Los Angeles doing software development work very similar to the place I work now. The place I work now is a small business with about 5 employees that, although a delight to work at, has a significantly lower salary, offers no benefits, and doesn't seem to be growing in any way shape or form. As much as I love my current job, it is a professional dead end with no other employees working in my area of expertise to draw inspiration and/or learn from.
The company I have received a job offer from has a much better base salary (+20k improvement over current), it is a start up which has brought on around 50 employees in the last year and seems to be going very strong. They have a strong benefits package including stock options and a signing bonus to pay for moving expenses. Most importantly though, I feel that this company will help me grow in my professional expertise more than I ever could at my current job.
My current job is located Salt Lake City, UT; it consistently brings in a *decent* paycheck and provides a comfortable standard of living. I am very happy at this job and I really like the people I work with, I just don't feel like I am getting anywhere by continuing to work here. | I have never lived in LA, and I have only visited one time for a single afternoon (when I was interviewed by the company that offered me a position). From what I've read, the cost of living in LA is substantially higher, but from what I can tell the pay increase I would be receiving would pretty well even out the increase in cost. The truth is, I'm not sure what I want to do. I love everything [I've seen] about the company and their job offer, but I am skeptical about living in Los Angeles. Can anyone give me some insight on what it's like to live and work around downtown Los Angeles; things like cost, day-to-day life, etc? Also, what are some ideal areas nearby to look for housing? |
t3_2jkkwe | relationships | Me [25 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] 1 year, Is it selfish to break up over making much more money? | I've been dating this girl for 1 year as of last week. It's been a fun year, we get along quite well and have had a lot of fun together. She recently brought up moving in together and although I'm sure it would be fun. Realizing the logistics of it have really made me question this relationship.
I've always been someone who is careful with money. I have a six digit bank balance and make ~$45 an hour. I went to college and got a really awesome job. I live by myself.
My girlfriend makes ~$10 an hour, has no plans of going to college and works at a fast food establishment. After paying for gas, insurance, bills etc she barely has any money left for extra spending. She currently lives with her parents.
My problem is if we move in together I'd basically still be paying the exact same amount for rent I am now. She said she would try to pay for groceries but I highly doubt she'll always be able to pay. This troubles me.
I like this girl a lot, she gets a long really well with my family but this just is bothering me. I don't think she is in this for a "meal ticket" but I don't want to be with someone who I have to support so much financially. I know that we are "young" but I also feel like this is something I should address as soon as possible in order to not waste anyone else's time.
I've never really broken up with someone before and feel like a jerk for even considering this. Is this a valid reason to do so? How do I go about explaining that I like her a lot but I don't think we can continue? How do you redditors deal with dating people that have a different income than you?
Thanks, | I make a lot more money than my girlfriend, that likely isn't going to change. It kind of bugs me. Is this a reason to break up with someone? |
t3_g66s7 | AskReddit | What's the most unexplainable/strangest thing that's happened to you? | Today I sat down at the computer to do actually do an assignment that's due tomorrow (not the strange thing). There were five parts to it and I had finished the first, so I decided to take a break. I came back a few hours later, read the second part of the assignment and finished that. Proud of how much I had gotten done, I decided to keep working. But there was a problem. The assignment paper with the questions written on it was gone. It had literally been on the desk right next to me. I've now torn apart my house looking for it, although I don't even remember getting up while working on the second part of the assignment and no one else had been in the room. I even had other people help me look for it. I have no clue where it could be. So instead of trying to figure that out, I'm on reddit. | I lost a somewhat important paper without getting up from my desk. My mind is fucked as to where it could be, and I've decided this is the strangest thing that's happened to me (at least recently). |
t3_v9sl5 | tifu | TIFU and most likely ruined my friendship with one of my best friends by calling him friendless | I blame shark week. And myself.
First off, I get supremely hurt by random little jibes. Things like playing hide and seek with people that will leave you in some musty closet. I still have some major trust issues from a difficult part of my childhood.
Anyways, in this case, the teasing went overboard, and I was almost in tears. My friends just weren't taking the hint. Finally they stopped, but a while later my blood was still boiling, I was pissed (Again, I blame shark week for my overreactivity). Somewhere in the conversation, he mentioned (jokingly) that people might avoid our group because of a weirdo like himself following them around. I replied "Yeah, that's why you have no friends."
And I said something like that AGAIN later. I could tell it hit him hard. Many lengthy apology texts later, with no reply, I am beginning to think our friendship is ruined. All because of my bitchy vengefulness. He looks more depressed than I have ever seen him and I know I really crossed the line. I don't know WTF is wrong with me. I love him like a brother and reddit, boy did I fuck up this time... | Best friend ticked me off and I said he had no friends in retaliation. Ruined a friendship, the trip I was on with my friends, and depressed him more than I knew was possible. |
t3_he1xi | loseit | How do I keep falling off the wagon? | I'm 19 female 5'6" and approx. 160 lbs (don't own a scale)...
A few weeks back, r/loseit really inspired me to get my butt in gear. I am not out of shape- I live on the sixth floor of an apartment and take the stairs multiple times a day and can do so easily, and I walk everywhere on my massive and hilly college campus... I just have some weight sticking in unattractive places. My belly makes me feel uncomfortable often- that little 'chin' has got to go! My inner thighs rub and chafe which frustrates me, and my face is rounder than ever.
The trouble is that I love myself. I know that I could stand to lose a few pounds for myself, and I feel great when I am dieting and exercising... but I have fallen off the bus repeatedly! I don't know how it happens.. the dining hall has fresh chocolate chip cookies, and I say "Okay.... just one." One turns into two, and suddenly my whole weekend is down the drain. I justify this by saying "Well, I'm not THAT fat!" | How you you resist temptation? |
t3_1j2syp | jobs | Networking really is the key | I wanted to share a little story that happened to me today. I work in a restaurant and was serving a regular customer today, though we had never met. We got around to chatting and somewhere along the way I let it slip I was recently graduated and looking to get into the IT or Finance field, and that I had been interested in healthcare related positions.
As it turned out, she was close friends with a manager at a major hospital and was planning to meet up with her on Sunday for drinks. I work Sunday, so she offered to introduce me to the manager and we'll see what happens from there. It's not anything serious, but it was a very cool thing for her to do and it really brightened my day. | When they say tell everybody you're looking for a job, tell *everybody* |
t3_nen2o | AskReddit | Reddit, what's your best "I can't believe the cops were called" story? | I'll start.
One slow night while working in a restaurant, a family of four came in (Mom & Dad, Sister & Brother (both around mid-teens)) and ordered dinner. One of them, I'm not sure which, ordered a Caesar salad. Somehow we had run out of Caesar salad dressing and the server was not informed when he brought the un-caesared salad to the table (a slight oversight of the server, but nothing major). Rather then saying anything, the family waited an hour before loudly complaining to management that nobody brought any dressing out. The mother makes sure that the entire restaurant can hear her, including Chef who decides to makes a batch of dressing for the sole purpose of shutting this woman up.
Less than ten minutes later the cops arrive because we were giving the customer "attitude" and talk to the parents and management out side. These two teenage siblings are left at the table, embarrassment to the point that their faces were beet red, for over an hour. Eventually I realize that the parents have left (still in the area), but the teens don't know what to do, so they are waiting until the parents came back, which takes another 45 minutes and the mother refuses to even be on the same side of the street as us. After they left both salad and dressing were untouched. | Cops got called because of lack of salad dressing. |
t3_2v204g | relationships | I (19F) am trying to leave my boyfriend (19m) but am failing miserably | I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years but recently have realised that I'm not really in love with him anymore. I cheated a few weeks ago which was really horrible of me I know, but I've taken this as a clear sign that I definitely shouldn't be in this relationship anymore.
However, when I try to end it my boyfriend just refuses to accept that it could possibly be over & persuades me to stay. I have literally told him to his face that I no longer love him & want to be single but he just won't accept this. It's got to the point now where I'm just lying to him to keep him happy, and I know that's pointless & helping no one but I feel trapped. I haven't told him I cheated & don't intend to.
So my question is how can I break up with him in a way that he'll understand (without being really horrible)?
And also should I do it before valentines day, leaving him really sad & lonely, or after valentines, meaning he would waste a lot of money on a gift for me when I'm leaving him? | trying to leave but he won't accept it, how can I break up in a gentle way that he will accept? And is breaking up worse before or after Valentines? |
t3_mtxsq | relationships | Girlfriend Problem | Alright, so I am a freshman in high school and this is my first girlfriend. We heve been dating for about 4 months. Once a while ago, I told her that i loved her, but she replied that this is my first relationship and I don't know what I'm talking about. I was hurt by this and I think she maybe could have reacted differently. I really do love her though. We were talking one day and she suddenly said "It's 11:11, make a wish!" So I wished that she loved me as much as I love her. Now this is where my problem starts, she desperately wants to know what i wished for, so I kept telling her that I couldn't tell her because then the wish wouldn't come true! This just made her angry and she gave me the silent treatment. So she is coming over for dinner this weekend and I was an idiot and told her that I would tell her my wish then if she would talk to me.
So now I have to tell her something that I would wish for, but I cant just make up anything. Why? Because like an idiot, I sorta described it in little detail, like "Is it about me?" "Yes" "Is it something I can say or do?" "Both"
So even if this seems stupid to you, I could use some advice because I don't want to tell her I love her again and have her react like she did again. Please help.\ | I want to tell her I love her, but I'm afraid i will get another negative reaction |
t3_1r7ime | relationships | Me [ 19 f] with my boyfriend [19 M] "what sucks about having a girlfriend is she is just a friend when she's on her period" | Background: I was in an abusive relationship for 4 years before I started dating my current boyfriend. I failed to ignore the red flags being a dumb and naive girl. So it's been about a 1 1/2 years since I broke up with my abusive ex and have started dating my current boyfriend. He has treated me so great, better then anyone else has but there has been a few things that have happened since we started dating.
He said the above quote and then said "Well I don't mean you but just in general." Now I know were friends as well as bf/gf but doesn't isn't love something more then just friendship?
Other things have happened that have made me think. Like he told me he loved me before we even started dating and has said since very early on that he want to marry me one day. Also he talks about one of his ex girlfriends quite often. At least once every time we hang out. Most of it is about how it made him mad that she pretty much abandoned him after he was shot at age 17 and almost died. Sometimes it's just about memories he has of her. I also want to say he isn't the type to be overly emotional or seem abusive in anyway. He doesn't get jealous either.
We have been together for about 6 months. I know hes a good guy I just don't want the past repeating it's self if that makes sense. | I'm in a new relationship and don't want to end up in another bad relationship. I don't know if I'm being paranoid or if there really is something bad going on. |
t3_337mnp | tifu | TIFU by almost becoming a registered sex offender (NSFW-ish) | Ok, this actually happened today...
So its about 11 pm and my girlfriend and I just met up after she got off work. It was a long day for both of us and being the two hormone raging teens we are, we decided to relax the way you think we would. We ended up in a local park and proceeded to diddle for the better part of 2 hours in the back of the car, until the faint sound of someone tapping glass interrupts our fun time.
You see, this park is known for two things. 1) doing the deed, and 2) getting completely baked. Yes, that's right, the cops had come through looking for kids on that 420 hype train and instead found my bare arse in the back of my car. He asked for our ID's (which my girlfriend didn't have to make it that much worse) and kindly reminded us that what we had done was public indecency and could both be convicted as sex offenders for the rest of our lives. Thankfully, he walked away and we both kinda sat there wondering if we were getting fined/ticketed/arrested until we figured we were in the clear. Now I'm sitting at home eating pizza and laughing it over. | Cop came looking for kids getting high and instead found my girlfriend and I in the back of the car. |
t3_yawqu | relationships | my Gf(26) thinks every girl in the world is out to steal me (m29). Requesting that I remove every person she finds suspicious from Facebook and contacts in phone. Will this get any better? What are some ways at dealing with this? (almost a year) | So basically I know this is insecurity issues, I am also told its very unhealthy when the person you are in a relationship with cuts you off from friends in such a way.
Basically we exchanged passwords, mostly as proof I have nothing to hide, even told her we could trade phones for a week if she wanted to.
What goes down is when she gets uncomfortable I.e. a girl messages me more than once or twice, a girl sends her phone number innocently to me on Facebook she deems it that they are being shady and trying to get in my pants and steal me. I'm in no way a model or anything, and I doubt any of them including friends of 10 years are trying to get in my pants.
What I've been doing, hence my username, has been just turning it around and having her remove people based off of her own reasoning for me removing people.
I was wondering will this ever get any better? And if anyone had suggestions in order to work with this to get it to a better place.
Thank you for your time. | Girl is having me remove friends from Facebook and phone because she thinks everyone is attempting to get in my pants. |
t3_13qoa9 | AskReddit | (Ex) girlfriend broke up with me and took $350 worth of stuff. How do I get it back? | We had been dating for over a year now and things were coming to a boiling point lately and she decided she wanted to move on. I had told I would be gone over the weekend and would leave my spare keys out so she could get all her stuff. I came home to find out, after a week without realizing that she had taken a $200 tent, $50 cooler, and about $100 of misc. stuff. I have no interest in getting back with her but would like my stuff back. Has anybody gone through a similar situation, and how have you (if you did) gotten it back? | Read title |
t3_2kyqhn | tifu | Tifu by not taking advice | This happened a couple of days ago and now I'm feeling the wrath.
Background: I like to smoke what one might call, marijuana. My parents aren't too fond of this (I live at home cas free roof) so I decided to take advantage of my surroundings. I built a spot where i can do said act in a peaceful and respectful manor with out having to worry about those blue coats with badges. The only problem that didn't occur to me until it was too late was the fact that poison oak grows where i made my nest.
The fuck up: I was at the gym the other day when my friend noticed a rash that looked awfully familiar to poison oak. He suggested I take care of this mysterious rash as if it was poison oak. Well redditt, I fucked up.
Results of stupidity: What was one small dot has now spread to both my arms, my stomach, and even under my eyebrows (yeah, eyebrows). I'm constantly trying to hide my hideous abomination of an arm with long sleeves as to avoid unwanted questions, but constantly being in uncomfortably warm conditions doesn't make it easy.
Work sucks because the a/c is broken, gym and sweatshirts don't work for me, and now I'm in the desert dirtbiking but am forced to wear these long sleeves. Im probably just overreacting but my gawd does this itch. I constantly feel as if each spot is being fondled by some evil being wielding a feather that has one goal and one goal only; to infuriate me beyond belief, and then one more ever so deliberately slow stroke of their feather.
It's not even that bad but I can't stop thinking about it. pics if thats a thing. | Advice only works if you take it. |
t3_1mu7cu | relationships | I [22 m] in transition of breaking up with [21f], in that deep dark place | I am incredibly sad because a relationship of 3 years is ending because we are both not in love anymore. My heart is broken because of what it has become. Its just a battle of who is right and who is wrong and a bunch of screaming matches.
We got into a heated argument last night, woke up this morning to her just going to sleep 20 minutes ago, post a status on facebook out of spite. Having a hard time grasping why someone you have loved for 3 years can just treat you like shit.
Even though I feel horrible right now and I hate her so much right, I am also happy because we are going to able to be happy again. I plan and cutting all contact from her, because she posts stupid quotes and pictures whenever we argue to get back at me, even though she swears its not about me.
How do you get over it? I don't have very many friends at the moment and all of us are in the same circle so I don't want to risk seeing her ever again. | need advice on moving on by myself. |
t3_xfug9 | AskReddit | Reddit, have you ever had any experience that you felt was supernatural? | I'll go first: While in boarding school located in rural Connecticut I lived in a dorm that was well over 200 years old. The dorm also happened to be the birthplace of Harriet Beecher-Stowe and the home of her father, famed abolitionist Henry Ward-Beecher. There was a painting placed in the fireplace of the dorm and stories were told about ghosts wakening if it was removed. As a 15 year-old I moved the painting for just a night. Though the building always creaked this night was especially bad, shutters flew upon at random though no trees outside were even rustling. Today I highly doubt it was anything even remotely supernatural (i don't even believe in the supernatural, even slightly) but i can't help but wonder about other people's experiences. | Moved a painting from it's rightful spot in an old fireplace, thought their were ghosts. |
t3_1dsi5h | relationships | We've only been married for 2 months (26M, 27F) and my father-in-law asked to move in with us. Should we do it? | * | FIL with history of gambling issues and money problems wants to move in with us only after 2 months of us getting married. I am working, my wife is currently unemployed. Torn on whether or not we should take him in. |
t3_2f625q | askwomenadvice | 21/M/single - Regret after a one night stand... I think I let something big just walk out of my door | I have recently had a one night thing with a girl. I was drunk/she was drunk and I met her on the night.
She came back to mine and stayed over. In the morning I was dying to ask for her full name or her number but she seemed really disinterested so I didn't and just let her leave. I basically wimped out..
Since then whenever I think of her I get a sinking feeling like I've really messed up and missed a chance at something and I don't know why. I don't know her. I think I could probably find her since the club we were in take a lot of photos and put them on Facebook.
Would it be weird to you ladies if a guy you had a one night stand with hunted you down via Facebook to ask to get your number since they were too scared to ask in the first place and if not then how can I go about it? | slept with a girl, too scared to get her details in the morning. Massively regret it and want to find her. What do? |
t3_3m87by | tifu | Tifu by trying to be more fit | So today I went for a run because I've been worried about my body. All I do is watch anime and play my | tried being healthy by going for a run before work and ended up coming home all sweaty to find that my water was off . |
t3_44f5js | relationships | I [26 M] overheared a violent confrontation between my neightbors [20s-30s F/F] and I don't know if I should do something | I live in a small apartment building with four units, and I just got a couple new neighbors who share a couple walls with me. My best guess from talking to them once is that they're both female, age 20-30, and in a committed relationship with one another. They seem nice - they moved in about a month ago, and I introduced myself a couple weeks back.
Tonight I heard a violent crash that sounded like it came from behind the apartment, so I stopped what I was going to go look out my back window. I didn't see anything but I did hear a lot of yelling and crying coming from my neighbors kitchen (a room that shares a wall with my place).
Normally I'm not super interested in what people do in their homes but I heard some things that I found concerning - things like "let go of me," "you're hurting me" "I want to leave", and so on. I also heard some exchanged accusations of who the aggressor was, and one accusation of the use of a knife in the confrontation.
I can't tell who is who through the walls, but I'm concerned that
1. There is abuse going on, possiblt to a level that could be dangerous
2. One party seems to be the agressor, but it also seems that threats are being made to create fals allegations.
I have never been in this situation before, and maybe I'm being too nosey, but I don't know at one point I should do something.
Things have calmed down now, but should I call the police or something if this continues? It's the first time I've ever heard anything going on over there, so I don't know if I'm overreacting. I don't even really know them. | Overhear new neighbors getting violent with each other, not sure at what point I need to call police or let someone else know. I've only met them once and I don't really know anything about the situation. |
t3_t3uoe | relationships | Boyfriend wants to skip my birthday? | My boyfriend and I have been going out for a little over a year (both 20). He recently revealed that my upcoming birthday is causing him a lot of stress. I probed him for more info, and he said that he doesn't know what to do and would rather just disappear for the weekend and come back when everything is over. However, he is going to a family friends birthday party on the same day (instead of mine) so I feel that he should put a little more effort into his plan since he is, in fact, disappearing for the weekend.
For his birthday, I took him to his favorite places, got him a gift, and made him dinner and a cake. He has alluded to the fact that I will probably not be getting anything. It's not that I want a gift, I just want to be shown a little effort and thoughtfulness.
I'm trying to figure this out before my birthday so I can prevent any disappointment. What should I do? Am I wrong to feel this way? | Boyfriend wants to "skip" my birthday because he doesn't know what to do for it. |
t3_21qdax | relationships | Me [23 M] with my girlfriend [23F] of 1 year, I have the lower sex drive | Me and my girlfriend have been dating a year now. We have a problem many couples do, but I feel the typical "gender roles" are reversed.
I have a much lower sex drive than she does.
I want it maybe 3-4 times a week She wants it twice a day. Is this something that will eventually destroy the relationship?
Its tough because for me its not really an issue. Often times I am just too tired or not in the mood, so we dont have sex. Fine by me, I'm getting all that I need. But it sucks for her and I feel terrible because she is not getting everything she needs physically. I can tell its really starting to worry her in regards to the long term durability of the relationship.
And its not like we are bad in bed either. We are fantastic in bed, we are both very happy with how things go there. The only problem is she wants it more than me
Note - I have offered to go down on her more often and I'd be more then happy to. But she said that does nothing for her if she knows I'm not getting riled up on it. I have also stopped masturbating all together so as to save as much drive as possible | Girlfriend is the one with the higher sex drive for a change, will this doom the relationship? |
t3_3mjcoa | tifu | TIFU by making my family believe even more in ghosts.. (John Cena included) | Alright, so this post was from earlier today, but, it is one dumb post I assure you.
So, my family is one to believe in ghosts.. There has been a lot of weird stuff happening in our house, from a weird ray of white light passing through my room to my parents seeing the same white light watching them sleep from afar while crying, we've seen a lot and we believed it.
But, there hadn't been any occurances of ghosts in the past 10 months till today.. Well, that's what my family thinks at least.. I realized my older brother wasn't home, so I decided to prank one of my younger brother, and, I had exactly the perfect idea of a prank.
So, I turned on the shower which was close to his room, took off my clothes and put my plan in action.. I started banging on his door while yelling "JOOOOOHHHHHNNNN CEEEEEENNAAAA" in my older brothers voice (I basically have the same voice as him so he didn't notice the difference). I heard a thump and I rushed to the shower.
My father arrived downstairs and asked my brother who made the noise. He said it was my older brother and that he made him fall off his chair and hurt his head. My father asked me the same question, looking puzzled. I didn't want to get punished for making noises and hurting my brother so I said it was my older brother and he just went back upstairs.
We are now a while later and they are all believeing, pale as a ghost should I say, after my father told my younger brother that my older brother wasn't home currently, that it was a ghost yelling "JOOOOOHHHHHNNNN CEEEEENNAAAA" who hurt my younger brother. | Family believes in ghost yelling John Cena because of me. |
t3_2majnq | running | Marathon training program with strength training? | (22 f for reference)
So I ran a marathon 2 years ago. It took me 4 hours and 50 minutes. I never walked, but my pace was slower than dirt.
I took some time off and trained for a second one the next year, but about 3 weeks out I got the flu, and failed 3 exams in a week. I dropped out of running to get my health back up and focus on school.
I started trying to run again in the summer and hurt myself by pushing to hard too fast.
So I took more time off, then got back into it again this fall starting with couch to 5k to make myself do it slowly, and I started lifting in the gym to build strength/core.
So now I've done a couple 5ks this fall (22 minutes on sandy hills). And I've dropped from 20% bf to 15% at the same weight. I'm feeling strong, and for running a few miles, I feel really good, with my times comfortably around 7-8 minute miles.
I've only been doing about 3 runs a week at 3-6 miles. and lifting on the other days.
I want to run another marathon, but to keep a 7-8 minute pace the whole way. I don't care how long it takes me to get there, but I'm not really sure how to go about doing it. When I did the marathon before I only ever focused on distance, never strength or speed. I would love it if there was a written out workout plan, or if I could design my own pre written out plan for a year to get myself from here to there.
Any advice or does anyone have a similar plan I could use? | I need a long term 15m a week-marathon plan that includes strength training and speed. |
t3_3te10f | tifu | TIFU by taking my Mom's advice | So I am 16 years old and yesterday my mother picked me up from school then dropped me off at home. On my way to the door to my house she reminds me that I need to put my face wash on. I tell her that I usually put my face wash on at night and not in the morning, but she insists that I put my face wash on in the morning as well. "Oh well couldn't hurt right" I put my face wash on in the morning and walk to school like I usually do.
During my 7th period class me and this girl ,who is considerably cute and kinda freaky ;) , Are talking in the back of the classroom. She asks for my phone (Thankfully she didn't see my pepe collection) and opens it up. Usually in class she likes to take pictures of herself or of myself and her, so it wasn't unusual that she wanted to take a selfie of us. The unusual part was her sticking her tongue out to try to lick my face. I ,being 16 and horny, think that i am about to experience the best sensation of my life. I am seriously going to get her heavenly tongue on my cheek. I'm thinking that this is going to be the best day ever. So she sticks her tongue out and slowly starts to lean in towards me. I'm thanking god for setting this up for me and right when her tongue is about to touch my face she pulls back. "WTF. Was she trolling me the whole time??? This is bullshit WTF is happening" She tells me that she was about to lick my face... But my face smelled like soap and she was thinking that my face would taste like soap too... FML | Girl used lick*, |
t3_3tminf | relationships | How do I [late 20s/f] deal with dating now that I know what cold sores really are? | So when I was a baby a female relative who had a cold sore kissed me and spread the virus to me. As I was growing up whenever I got a cold sore,I would be sure to never touch it or share utensils, toothpaste, straws, lipstick, or kiss anyone because I was told it was contagious. They always came when I got really sick and I thought everyone got them when they had a fever. Adults around me always called them cold sores or fever blisters rather than a part of the herpes virus. I searched wikipedia a few weeks ago about cold sores and found out that way and freaked out. . I exercise, drink tons of water, etc which helps the duration of outbreaks. I haven't gotten a visible cold sore in about 7-8 years and thought through some implausible miracle that I didn't have HSV. I just got done blood work done (which I was told can find the antibodies that the body creates to try and fight the virus). I came back positive for hsv 1 and my doctor said that spreading the virus when a blister isn't active is very very uncommon. Herpes has such a terrible connotation and I don't know how to deal with the fact that I have this incurable virus and never engaged in sexual activity at the time to get that. My doctor said something like 60% of the world population has hsv1, with or without symptoms. I just feel so dirty and like my future relationships are going to be doomed. How do I even proceed with dating now without having this horrible label tied to me? After the diagnosis I've been crying, feeling like I'll never be loved, while also trying to figure out how to talk to future sex partners. | wikipedia's cold sores and I'm trying to figure out how to mentally get over this label I now have and how to talk to figure partners. |
t3_esv8w | AskReddit | Tips for parenting 2 y/o? | My fiancée (whom I love an adore) has a 2 (almost 3) year old son (who I also love and want to treat as my own). I'm really new to the fathering game and wondered if any of you parents had some tips for handling a kid about this age. It seems like one minute they're all happy go lucky, but the minute you tell em "No", they bring out the waterworks. I consider my father to be a great father, and I'm going to ask him for advice, also, but I thought it would be nice to get some Reddit advice, as well. | Any advice for parenting a 2 (almost 3) year old? |
t3_4rqrwm | legaladvice | Marijuana and Kids | So, I have a baby. With the birth of a new family member, some pretty gnarly Post partum depression came too. I currently live in a state where recreational use is still illegal (IL). When my kid is napping and my husband is at work, I like to visit with my friend mary jane on my screened in back deck. Not only is it relaxing and fun, it's been really, really effective at treating my PPD. Ive got neighbors though, and I'm sure they know that I smoke because of the smell/frequency. I'm pretty sure they also know we have a kid. If one of them decided to call the cops one day because OMG DRUGS AND KIDS would my life be ruined?
I know that I have the right to refuse a search if they come knocking, but knocking + dogs = barking, and barking and sleeping babies don't mix. If they suspected drug use and then heard my kid crying when I answered the door, would that be "probable cause" to enter my residence? If they saw my pipes out on the deck, would they arrest me right then? What would happen to my kid? | are my visits with mary jane putting me at a higher risk of arrest and/or putting me at risk of losing my baby? |
t3_2qidpo | relationships | Should I (M/24) tell my new girlfriend (F/24) about an addiction to porn I used to have that I'm still recovering from? | Or really, at what point should I tell her, because even though I'm scared to death of sharing this I think it's something we are gonna need to discuss. I've had several girlfriends and one previous long term relationship, but I struggled with intimacy mainly due to what I learned was a serious porn addiction.
I'm not a virgin technically, but I've never orgasmed during sex and my porn addiction caused me to be dis-interested in my otherwise awesome relationship and lose a great girl. I still have a lot of inexperience with actual sex and physical intimacy, even though I've had partners.
I finally realized I had a problem with porn addiction in April and joined the sub-reddit NoFap. I've had my ups and downs, but I've only PMO'd (Porn - Masturbation - Orgasm) about 5 times in the last 2 months which is the biggest step in my progress. However, it's been said it takes about 90 days of abstaining for your brain to "reset" the addiction and I'm still very much trying to recover.
The new woman I'm seeing is every bit as amazing as my last girlfriend, if not more so, and we've already been comfortable enough to share a lot of personal things with each other, but this the one thing I haven't brought up. We've basically only got to second base so far, but I know before we get intimate I'm going to have to tell her about my inexperience and why that is. I don't want to make the same mistake with her as I did the last one, as I want us to have a fullfilling romantic and sexual relationship.
I'm very nervous about bringing up this dark side of my life to her, even though we've grown so close so fast. I've made a lot of progress since April, but it is something I still struggle with and I'm still fighting to fully recover from. How should I break it to her? Will she understand? I care about her a lot and I'm really scared :/ | Scared to tell new girlfriend about my battle with porn addiction; want to be open with her so we can achieve intimacy. |
t3_2xtmh7 | tifu | TIFU by taking my car to get washed | I like to keep my car clean and usually I just wash and clean the inside of my car myself. Well I had a day off so I decide to just take my car to a carwash service station and pay someone to clean it for me. I dropped my car off and was told it would be ready in about 30 minutes. In the meantime, I left with my friend to run some errands. My car was a little dirty so we figured it'd be ok to arrive after an hour. When we return, my car isn't there. My car isn't anywhere in the parking lot. No one is there. I start to freak out a little. This has never happened, not to me, nor anyone. I go into the gas station and have the cashier call the owner of the car wash. The owner doesn't know anything. He said he will call the employees that were working there that day to find out what happened, in the meantime he said to call the cops. Long story short, called the cops bc we thought the employee stole it. Employee came back, was obviously fired, and lied that he either took the car for a joyride or something else, we don't know the real story. I got my car back but this took up hours of my day off bc I didn't spend an hour just cleaning my car myself. | took my car to the carwash, employee almost stole it, never paying someone to wash my car again. |
t3_2p8umq | relationships | Need help with highschool drama | This is your everyday relationship drama. I(16M) like a (17F)senior and she is quite popular. We are friends but i dont see any hints of being in the friendzone. Never specifically said you are my best friend or anything. Ive helped her finish a project in the morning that she needed to get finished and she hugged me and said i love you. Got her a new water even when she said not too because i felt bad since hers got ruined by me (long story); again another "i love you" but no "you are such a good friend."
One day i was wearing a ring to show up like a poet for an english presentation. She said we are married and now i wear it like i am. The next day she asked me where is it and i said in my backpack bevause we were in gym class. On the bus to a concert for orchestra, she shoved icing in my ear (she was eating cake) and told everyone around that we were married. Today i complimented her, she said thanks, and tried to have a convo. I asked to go eat dinner with a bunch of friends which she said yea sure however her mom was annoying so she wasnt sure. Later i overhear her friend ask if she is doing anything and she says "yes,no". So either her mom said no or she wanted to be with her other friends ( i dont blame her, my group was kinda boring anyway)
I see her everyday and smile and wave and she does too. Sometimes she will pet my hair if im sitting down and she comes near me but her friend also does that whom im really close too as well.
should i be a man and just say something along these lines "hey i like you, do you think we can try hanging out more often?" | should i be blunt to a girl that i like her. I dont see anyway friendzone signals but i maybe wrong. |
t3_32ug5x | tifu | TIFU by inadvertedly offending a mourning friend. | I was hanging out with a friend of mine, John, while we met another one, Anette. Anette asked me how my mom is doing and I replied as I usually do, by saying "she's alive" while maintaining strong eye contact and smiling lightly at her for a couple of seconds in total silence. I continued the conversation for a while longer. However, I was somewhat surprised that Anette seemed to be a bit disconcerted and John got completely red on his face. As soon as Anette left, he burst into laugh.
John knew that Anette mother had died recently and I even attended her funeral last week and gave her my condolences. I just made absolutely no connection between that event and my usual, calm, "my mom is alive" reply.
In all honestly, the story happened 7+ years ago. I just never apologized and I feel bad about that to this day. | told a daughter mourning recent death of her mother that my mother for a change is alive and owned it due to cluelessness. |
t3_15ic6s | relationship_advice | [20/m] Probably the usual friend-zone issues but I could really use some help. I hope this is in the right sub. | This is the last place I wanted to go with this, not because I think that people here couldn't give good advice but because I am not the kind of person to ask for help, I think part of it is that I really would like to talk about this but I have no where else to turn. I am sure you have read a million posts like this and will say I am an idiot, but I could care less, if you don't like it then down vote, anyway..
Here is my situation: I am a 20 year old college student from a rural town going to college in a big city. I have always had a really good group of friends, and I have always had a crush on one of my friends (She is actually my best Friends sister, but I'll get to that later.) Anyway this girl, is amazing, she is smart, athletic, funny, caring, and the nicest person you'd ever meet, and I promise I am not just saying that because of how I feel. So she is awesome, and over the last two years we have gotten extremely close, the problem had always been that she has had a boyfriend. The boyfriend turned out to be a cheating asshole and now she is single. Which I have been ecstatic about, but that obviously doesn't automatically bring us together. At the time of her last relationship while we were getting close we got into this weird friendship where it seemed like we wanted to date each other but never did. We have never really talked about our feelings for each other outside of friendship and honestly I am terrified of bringing it up.
So basically my question is what should I do? I don't want to ruin this friendship, but I don't think I can deal with just being friends, eventually being the girls shoulder to cry on becomes too much. In addition I don't want to screw up and become a rebound after her last long term relationship. Honestly I may be fooling myself, and she may see me as nothing but a friend and always has, I just don't know. Her brother, my best friend, says that I am being a pussy and that if it wasn't for the other guy we would have already been together. | I've got a Girl Best Friend, I am in love with her, she recently broke up with her long term boyfriend, what should I do? |
t3_2ghn34 | tifu | TIFU By putting the battery in my car the wrong way. | So I got off of a 12 hour shift at work my car has been having troubles because the battery I had in it was old and worn. So i go to autozone and get a new one I was rushing to the fact I needed to be someone early. Take about 3 minutes to change a car battery. Well I let my OCD kick in and reversed the battery because the post were different on this battery and I turned it around, I noticed sparks come off as I did this and thought "man that is weird never seen that before" so I get in the car and try to start it. I then notice no light no head lights and the car wont turn over. I go in autozone and say the battery won't start the car but the old one will. Guy goes out and looks at it and says "uhh its reversed". "FUCKKKKKK MEEEEE" is what i said. panic set in as I took off the connections. I put it in the right way this time double checked and everything. Go to start the car same shit. I called up my mech(25yrs of exp) friend and he says "well...For sure some fuses broke check those ooorr you could have just fucked your car" he lists off stuff that could have broke. Fuel pump, alternator etc. etc... So I go searching for broken fuses. nope nope nope here is one 15amp on nope nope i then break a 10amp and a 5amp fuse while trying to look at them... ok replaced all the fuses. Bam the car starts. But wait there is no dash board lights or headlights, I call him and he says "did you check the big fuses?" I say "what big fuses?" He looks up my car and tells me about this little box in the engine compartment and I go looking for it after 5 minutes I found the little bastard and sure enough the alternator 100amp fuse is trashed. fix that and boom car works again after 2 hours of panic. Then a old man walks out and says "I knew that is what happened I have 45 years of doing this then laughs and walks away" in my head I was like you couldn't have told me that sooner huh. He wanted me to do it on my own I guess. | Rushing to get someone put battery in wrong made a 3 minute job in a living nightmare for 2 hours. Got laughed at by a old man that knew what was broken and didn't say. |
t3_1vd2uk | relationships | Is it wrong for my [21/F] acquaintance to whom I introduced my boyfriend of two years [22/M] to initiate and pursue a friendship with him? | I recently introduced my boyfriend of two years to a single acquaintance of mine. I am friendly with this woman, but not so friendly that we correspond outside of social events or would hang out alone.
My acquaintance and my boyfriend really hit it off. After a couple of encounters, I realised they had exchanged numbers (but haven't used them as far as I am aware).
Soon after, my acquaintance asked to talk to my boyfriend while I was on the phone to him.
Very recently at a party, she asked him to go running with her (as they are both enthusiasts). When she noticed I was listening she invited me, but as an afterthought, and knowing full well I'm not a runner. No concrete plans eventuated.
On the one hand, I don't own either of them and I shouldn't stop my boyfriend making new friends. On the other hand, I can't help feeling like my acquaintance is overstepping some unwritten boundaries. Am I crazy? | Introduced female acquaintance to my boyfriend. I feel like she is intently pursuing a friendship with him. Is this wrong of her, or am I overly jealous? |
t3_407usp | relationships | I [20 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of four months, got blackout drunk | We went out, but with separate friend groups.
I drank way too much with my friends. It didn't hit me until I was leaving the club. When I got out the door I started feeling woozy. Somehow I made it home and my friend locked me inside my place as they left to drop others off. Basically I was beyond a mess and I'll spare Reddit the details. No I didn't barf everywhere. It was actually worse than barfing.
My buddies decided to call my girlfriend and have her take care of me through the night. She did. She basically became a mom of a two month old that night while in her going out clothes. I'm sure she saw things she wish she could unsee. I know I need to do something to make up for it. Plus she knows that people in the group I went with have cheated before in the club, and actually at the same annual event we went to as well. I didn't cheat, however. I actually saw one of my girlfriend's friends at the venue I went to and we said hi. And I was not blackout drunk in the club, it was after when the alcohol hit. | girlfriend cleaned me up after I got schwasted. How can I make it up to her and show her that I'm all hers? |
t3_yfbk5 | AskReddit | My "ill" grandfather has resigned himself to death. What can I do? | A couple of years ago my grandfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer, received the grueling treatment, and the cancer has gone into remission. This was extremely stressful for him and caused a lot of serious heart problems that had him in and out of the hospital recently. The physical problems have been managed, but the emotional ones have not. He will not leave the house, will constantly make excuses for himself, doesn't eat and has become uncharacteristically self-absorbed.
I have been in college for the last 4 years and haven't had as much contact with my grandparents as I wish I had, but in a couple of weeks my family and I are taking a trip to see them. I have no idea how to act. This is a man who has always been a positive figure in my life who's now basically waiting around to die. | Grandfather had serious health problems and has become a different person from depression. |
t3_33b53c | relationships | Me [19 M] asked my girlfriend [18 F] of almost two years a serious question and am hurt. | I [19 M] am just about to finish my first year of college and like most people, it has been difficult. I suffer from depression and have been on my own since age 15 so I have some baggage. I have no support from family and am financially responsible for my mother. My girlfriend [18 F] has had a much easier life than I have, basic supporting family all her life and doesn't struggle with grades, hasn't done drugs or drink, and is in her senior year of high school. We have been through tough times together, being on the opposite sides of the spectrum of having an "easy" life. This has always brought us closer though.
I recently asked her "Does my depression ever seem too much for you?" She said, " I don't know how to handle it and I'm really hoping you will be better when school is done to be completely honest. I feel like it is tearing us apart....." I told her, "I won't let it tear us apart." And she only responds with "Well I hope it gets better soon cause its really hard on my part, I know you are going through a really hard time, but its also hard for me."
I am not sure why, but this hit me harder than anything she has said. She has always been there to support me through all that I've been through, but it doesn't seem that way now. I am hurt because I always thought she would be able to be there to help pick me up,but it seems like she doesn't want to. I know she is not obligated to stay with me, but this seems really cold. She has shown no sign of it until I brought it up.
Maybe I am overreacting? Has anyone been through similar experiences? Any advice would help greatly. | Asked girlfriend of almost two years if my depression seem too much and got an honest, but hurtful answer. |
t3_3dmwth | legaladvice | Helping a Russian wedding guest get a tourist visa for the US | Not sure if this is the right subreddit for this but I've seen stuff on immigration here and [r/visas] has like 17 subscribers soo...
We have a close friend who is a Russian citizen but lives abroad; we met her when we were living in China but now she lives in Germany. We really want her to come to our wedding in August, and she has a visa interview later this month. I am worried that she will not get the visa or it will be delayed because of all the horror stories I have heard lately about US visas for non-US citizens, and the current issues with Russia, etc.
I am wondering, is there any point in me and my fiance contacting the embassy she is visiting before her interview to try and legitimize her visa? Does that kind of thing help or could it potentially hurt her chances? | Will contacting the embassy before a friend's tourist visa interview help or hurt their chances of getting a visa? |
t3_1k4vf2 | relationships | [22/F] feeling like the guy I'm talking to [23/M] is losing interest. | About a year ago, I met a guy at a party and we hit it off. We talked all night and at the end, he asked me out to dinner. We texted for the next month or so but we never linked up schedules. We saw eachother one more time that summer but he moved across the country a couple days later.
For the past year, he's been texting me on and off, and making sure to let me know whenever he's home to try to meet up. We finally did one night and he ended up staying overnight with me. We talked all night but, besides a little kissing, nothing too crazy.
I should mention that I had an off-and-on boyfriend during this time. Wasn't a great guy, but we had been together for a long time. We were not together at the time of the kiss or anytime after that point.
A few months after that, he comes home again for a week and makes sure to come see me, introduces me to his friends, and we slept together. He keeps saying how he chased me for so long and how he likes hanging out with me. At the end of the week though, he makes a point to say how he isn't interested in a relationship.
After he leaves, we continue texting. He keeps mentioning me coming to visiting, so I planned a trip out there. I keep saying "if you're too busy with work, it's fine, I can come another time or something" and he'll say he wants me to come. As soon as I let him know that I can book a flight, he seems less interested. He doesn't answer my texts as much and just seems off. Finally, (and this is silly, I know) he says he's going to ignore me until I tell him my reddit name. I just laughed it off and said "OK" but I haven't heard from him since (this was a few days ago).
I just don't understand where I went wrong. My friends thinK I slept with him too soon. I really don't do that often, but I'm not one of those girls who tries to lobby sex for a relationship. Did I come on too strong? | Chased for a year and suddenly lost interest |
t3_wwir6 | jobs | Dealing with or without Recruiters | I am on the search for a job in engineering--straight out of my master's, but with plenty of internship and research experience.
My daily Indeed search dug up a great opportunity today for a junior engineering position, but the company that made the posting is just a headhunter Human Resources type company. As I have learned to do with such postings, I simply Google'd some of the wordings until I found the actual company they are representing. (It's not hard when they don't bother to change any of the wording except replacing the company name with "our client"). Anyway, it's one of my dream companies. I haven't applied there yet, but I've been watching them.
I tend to see if I can apply directly with the company in these cases. But in this case, the listing on the actual hiring company's website lists it as requiring 5 years of experience, whereas the staffing agency only listed 2 years, and claimed to be a jr. position. I know I can use my master's in very related subjects to claim 2, but 5 is generally where I don't bother trying.
So, what should I do? Should I try applying to the main company's more experience required ad? Or should I risk going through this mystery head hunter company who may or may not actually be able to get me this position and thus risk losing all chances with the actual company I want to work for. | Through some sleuthing, I found a job listing at one of my dream companies via a poorly-worded HeadHunter company ad. The HeadHunter ad requires less experience than the dream company's ad. I meet the lower requirements. Which should I apply to? |
t3_4e9avz | Dogtraining | Looking for easy activities to engage a herding dog | About 4 months ago, we adopted an ACD mix. She's almost two years old; I'd describe her as medium-high energy, but not hyperactive. We keep her just exercised enough that she's not annoying, but she's an absolutely wonderful dog and companion when she's truly *tired.*
Her typical daily activities include a couple 30 minute walks, playtime in the backyard, mental games, training, and dog park on the weekends. When we go to the dog park, her absolute favorite thing to do is try to convince some other dogs to play chase. She'll pretend to fetch balls or toys if that will engage another dog, but really she just wants to run in a circle, whether she is chasing or being chased.
There have been a couple of times that we've gone to the dog park during off-hours, so it's just been her and another friendly dog. When she has the open space, she really goes into "herding" mode with her body crouched, stalking, and even the "stare," before chasing after the dog (it's totally friendly, they play bow at the beginning, and there's a lot of breaks and trades). This is when she's at her absolute happiest. She could do this for hours, and it exhausts her.
Are there any activities that we can try at home to fulfill her herding instinct? We play fetch/tug with balls and ropes, and she'll oblige, but she seems to get bored of them really quickly. She seems less interested in retrieving and more interested in chasing.
A couple limitations:
*We live in the surburbs, so there aren't a lot of opportunities for practice with livestock
*Our backyard is medium-sized, but not large enough that she can run at full breakaway speed
*We've looked into agility and flyball, but her obedience isn't solid enough for off-leash commands.
-We're also limiting active play with humans, since she can get mouthy/bitey when she's excited | 2 y/o cattle dog doesn't have any cattle to herd. What are some easy ways to put her to work? |
t3_mj01e | AskReddit | Help! Possible alcohol addict! | I have been on and off for the past few years drinking alcohol, what the doctors would consider 'heavily'. I can and will drink between three liters of beer a night. I'll do it by myself or with friends, regardless. On the weekends I can easily double that to 'six liters' an evening. This has been the norm for the past few years. Before someone calls me a 'pussy' or 'faggot', I know this is not a healthy life to live. The liver, kidneys, and pancreas can only take so much. This has been my norm for about three years. I don't know how to break it. The longest I have gone without alcohol has been eight days. I can't get passed it and don't know what to do.
Before I came to where I currently live, I thought of myself as a creative individual. Maybe depression and loneliness got in the way.
<b>Extra info:</b>
-I don't live in Europe, North America, or South America
-There is no A.A. (or other groups) where I live
<b> | I drink more than the daily dosage. This is my norm. I want to quite or slow down. I don't know how. I don't live in a country that has programs to help people out. </b> |
t3_325alp | relationships | I [22M] have just gone through a break up with ex-gf [22F]. Main reason for break up has changed. What now? | Me and my GF of almost 3 years broke it off 10 days ago. The reason for the break up was that our short term long distance relationship suddenly became a long term LDR because of changes in her education plans.
We studied the same subject when we got together, but I dropped out and went to a different uni for a year. She dropped out too (at the same time), but went to a different university than me. My plan was to take one year at my current uni and then continue at hers next semester, but some time ago, she started talking about going back to what we both studied to begin with, which would mean 4 years of LDR. That was not something I would want, and I told her this in pretty clear terms, and asked her to tell me when she figured out what she was going to do next semester.
Then, ~two weeks ago she told me that she was moving back to uni #1. We parted ways on good terms, and hoped that our paths would cross again.
Yesterday she sendt me a text saying that changes in the course plan made her want to stay at her current uni. This would mean that we are going to be at the same uni next semester.
The thing is, she sees it as a given that we are now back together. I really love this girl, but all this back and forth has made me confused and unsure. She "abandoned" the plan we had when she told me that she was going back to uni #1, when I have decided to continue my education at uni #2, mainly because of her.
I think i have come further than her in processing our break up, and it's hard for me to just pick it up where we left off. I don't think the reality of us not being together had dawned on her yet.
I'm afraid to be happy, because of the chance that she might change her mind again.
Has anyone been through something akin to this?
Am I right to need some time to think about this? | short term LDR went long term LDR went break up. Not long term LDR any more, what now?* |
t3_17bx3b | AskReddit | Reddit, what is the best way to deal with a controlling S.O? | My gf is the most controlling person I have ever met. She makes me block other girls on Facebook and monitors who I talk to and what I do. We are both sophomores in college and she took a class with me, bad idea. There is a girl in our group and now she wants us to drop out of the group and I just feel like that is a dick move. Stuff like this has been going on for over six months now. I don't know how to deal with it, she never gets better only worse. She has talked to therapists but won't fully tell them the extent of her jealousy and control issues. She hates my friends, hates that I talk to other girls rarely, and I am seriously considering breaking up. Any advice? | Controlling gf is controlling and jealous. |
t3_jy2we | AskReddit | How did you first realize that maybe it isn't everyone else, it might be you? | I have a family member who had been very self-centered for the past few years. She can be pleasant and friendly but she goes through periods of turmoil (often centered around boyfriends and relationships) where she will fuck anyone over to get what she wants. If you don't help her get what she wants, she'll hate you. Just in the past year she has been in "I hate you" mode with just about everyone in her life including friends and family. She can't keep boyfriends and many of her friends have stopped talking to her. Some of her behavior includes stealing money, borrowing items (often without permission) and returning them in dirty or broken condition (if at all), bitching at people for not giving her money when she's broke, stealing boyfriends from friends, etc. She firmly believes she doesn't do anything wrong and basically that she's entitled to act this way and everyone is just being mean to her. If you bring up the fact that she's basically not caring about others, she storms off and you enter the "I hate you" group until she needs something again. So my question is, have any of you been in a similar situation where you may have been acting inappropriately and something made you realize that maybe it was you, not everyone else? | Family member is being a bitch, thinks everyone else has the problem. Any advice on how to make her see she's the one with the problem? |
t3_2vhc21 | relationships | My (f/27) sister (f/24) is playing house with a man (m/37) 13 years older than her. He knocked her up and they want to keep it | All of this is just fucked up beyond words so here we go:
They've been together for 4 years, living together for about 3 I think. No one in my family likes this man, except her, and she seems to like him more than enough for all of us. He is arrogant and probably more than a little bit sexist. They met on some dating website I guess and she totally fell for him. She moved in a year later and since then she has been playing the submissive housewife. She hasn't had a job since they've been together; he treats her like a maid, cooking, cleaning, waiting on him, etc.
I think everyone was hoping that she would, I don't know, get over it at some point but it hasn't happened. She is madly in love with this prick. He buys her off. When she isn't the little kitty at his feet lapping up her milk she is off spending his money. Spa treatments, peticures, etc. She drives a mercedes for Christ's sake. Then she comes around and sprinkles his money on family member's kids over the holidays and brags about the charity work they do. They constantly invite family/friends out for dinner and cover the tab just because they can. She has become more than a little arrogant herself
Ok sorry, back on topic: They invited the whole family over for a party last past weekend and announced she was pregnant. I almost blurted 'when is the abortion' but they BOTH want to keep it. They were both glowing. The only reason I could see for this man to want to keep a baby is to tie my sister up with him without marriage. It certainly puts an end to everyone's hopes that she would snap out of it.
I just wish there some way to explain to her and get it through her empty mind that this relationship is fucked up. She is living in fairy tale land in a life that she didn't earn and isn't hers to have. | sister and bf of 4 years are having a baby, tying her down with him. I would to know if there is something, ANYTHING I can do or say to get her to realize how Fubar this is. |
t3_x3qqy | AskReddit | Got Epi- Wavefront LASIK (PKR) 4 days ago - Supposed to go back to work tomorrow - help? | So reddit, I can barely read what I'm typing right now so please excuse the typos. I'm supposed to go have the "Bandage" contacts removed tomorrow in plant of time to call in sick if something is wrong. So far the experience has been less than stellar other than occasionally getting an idea about how my vision is going to be awesome when I *can* see clearly.
So far this has been nothing like they told me it was going to be. It has been the worst pain of my life up until I crested the pain hill yesterday and started coming back down to normalcy. My eyes have finally stopped feeling like a pair of peeled grapes with glass in them. Every time I called they just said "that's normal, take 800mg of ibuprofen, take vicodin to knock you out, and ice them". And that was it. Other than the Docotor calling once to assure me that I was on the right track and to prescribe me more vicodin.
Here's the main problem, he said I should be able to go back to work tomorrow, and I had only taken enough time off to cover up until tomorrow. My eyes are so sensitive to light that I'm having trouble keeping them open to type this and I type for a living. Does anyone know anything about this? Has anyone been there and can tell me that I really AM on the right track and that tomorrow I will feel SO much Better? This guys a pretty well known doctor, it's not that I don't trust him exactly, I'm just freaking out a little bit. | Got Epi-Wavefront Lasik on Friday, supposed to be able to get the "bandage" contacts removed and go to work tomorrow but cannot see shit because my vision is gross most of the time - need to know I'm not crazy and would like some cute hedgehog pictures. Preferably in hats. |
t3_1t47d6 | relationships | I [22F] am getting mixed signals from a guy [23M] that I've been sleeping with the past 2 months. Need insight. | I met him online, we met up for drinks, and I ended up going home with him. Our one night stand has led to us sleeping together a few more times since the beginning of November (maybe once every two weeks or so). It is pretty casual, we only text to make plans for the next time to see each other (i.e., "busy tonight? come over"). We have great chemistry when we're together - not just the sex, but just our personalities mesh really well.
Every time after we have sex, I try to leave because I tend to get attached really easily but sometimes, he manages to convince me to stay and hang out (watch a movie, spend the night). When I do stay, he acts sweet and very relationship-y. As expected, this causes me to get more attached. I will make the first move and text him a day or two later, but won't hear back for days until the next time he wants to get laid.
What gives? Why does he act like he wants more after we have sex, yet wants nothing at all (not even to talk or get to know me) in between? | He only texts me for sex but acts like he wants more in person. Why? |
t3_1jayax | relationships | [20m] I met a girl [19f] on a dating site who's almost a perfect match, but she just wants a hookup right now where as I am more inclined to build an actual relationship. Advice? | I've been speaking with a girl on a dating site recently, and in the beginning we simply had talked about our interests and the like and found out we were pretty much carbon copies of each other. I'm really into her.
Problem was, at one point she just completely dropped off the face of the earth for a few months, not even going on the site at all. In a way, I had sorta forgotten about her. Had gone on dates with a few other girls who were nice but just didn't click. Then, two days ago out of the blue, she asked me if I wanted to chat again, which we've been doing. And then today, after asking if she was ready to go out, she said she's only really into hooking up right now, and then possibly seeing how it works out afterwards, possibly taking a relationship further.
I myself am the kinda guy that just wants a long term relationship, and she seems like a great girl. Fact of the matter is that I'm now unsure of what I want. I've never had a "hookup" before and to be honest, I'm unsure of what to do.
My cock says yes, my brain says is unsure, and my heart is somewhere in the middle of the two.
Not even sure if this is the right sub, but any advice as to what I should do? | Asked for a hookup on a dating sight (which I haven't done before) and need advice about what to do as I'd rather date her right now that anything. |
t3_rowam | AskReddit | What was the dumbest crime you've seen or heard about? | When I was 13, I got a | Tried to steal my |
t3_2tiidf | tifu | TIFU by trying to cup my own fart | So today me and the girlfriend were chilling in bed watching a movie, usually I cup my farts and sniff them as a way to really gross her out (I honestly think I'm mentally fucked since I've been cupping my farts a lot lately and sniffing them) anywho I felt a nice fart brewing in my stomach, I decided it would be the perfect opportunity to cup my fart and put it in her face for the lulz, eveything was set in place, a girlfriend totally unexpected of the doom she was about to experience, a perfect fart brewing in my stomach, and my hand ready to transport a lethal dose of my toxic fart.....
Until I sharted in my hand. As I was mid sentence of saying 'SUPRISE FART ATTACK' my hand wasn't greeted with the usual deadly gas I had planned for, but a fucking hand full of hot liquid in my palm. As soon I farted I knew I had overshot it, however I was not prepared for the puddle of black reek which laid in my hand. After the failed attack I quickly ran to the bathroom hoping not to look too inconspicuous, however my girlfriend was fully aware of what transpired and I could only hear from the bathroom of her reaction of utter disghust and verbal insults. Looks like I'm not getting sex for a while :( | farted in my hand trying to suprise girlfriend, ended up sharting in hand |
t3_1qc2uz | relationship_advice | [Update] [16/f] I need to break up with my boyfriend (18/m) - How do I do it? | Asked for [help] here yesterday and I'm planning to break it off soon, probably the next time we meet (Thursday). I made a list of reasons why we should break up and keep on looking at it but still don't know how to do it. (Posting reasons in comments to avoid clutter)
How do I break up with him and how do I minimize the pain? Should I drop hints on what will happen over the next few days, or should I just tell him on Thursday that we need to talk? My reasons aren't all complimentary and one of them is that I don't really know if I've ever loved him, much. Do I lie to his face and exclude those reasons from the conversation or do I tell the truth even though it will hurt him more?
Help! :/ Thanks reddit in advance | This post is really short. Anyway I need to break up with my boyfriend. Help me? |
t3_10410i | AskReddit | Lady up the street likes to do U-turns in my yard when she thinks we aren't looking, what should I do? | So the other day I was sitting in my living room on my laptop and I happen to see lights outside my living room window. Well my living room window faces a road that is parallel to it so I went outside to investigate. Some lady from two houses down from me was just pulling into her driveway and there are no other cars around. Before I spoke to her I went and checked my yard to see car tracks (my grass had just been cut that day).
I am raging at this point but allow myself to calm down before I go over there. After I calm down I walk over there and ring the doorbell and when she answers the door I politely ask her to not drive on my yard to which she replies "Oh I wasn't driving on your yard, I was only on the sidewalk" and when I point out the fact of the tracks she just repeats herself in a smart ass way which made me angry so I just pointed out the tracks again to which she starts yelling. After about a minute of her yelling and me trying to keep my composure she turns around and slams the door in my face and to this I lose it and say "Bye bitch!"
She turns around and is more fiery than ever and shes yelling cuss words and threatening me by "someone bigger than me". At this point I don't care and just wave and part with a fond "fuck you". This may have made this worse and I know I was in the wrong at that point, I just lost my composure and this lady was suuuuuuuch a bitch. Is there anything I can do to keep her from driving in my yard without having to put up a fence? Which is not allowed in my neighborhood for some reason. | Crazy lady likes to do U-Turns in my yard. Calmly confronted her about it and got talked down to, lost control, and may have made it worse that way. Not sure what to do |
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