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[INST] FINALLY THANK GOD SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT MY LAST COMPANY FIRED ME TO EMPLOY THESE GODDAMN RETARDS PEOPLE, IT'S NOT ABOUT SKILL, IT'S ABOUT APPEARANCE [/INST] The appearance of that cowgirl givin' brain.
[INST] I'm slightly net negative for the year but I still have to pay federal and state estimated taxes. Fuck. [/INST] Do you want to cry and talk about it? This is a safe zone.
[INST] If I worked at AMD I would start every conversation on Monday with 'excuse me, do you speak English?' [/INST] Well it would be in San Jose, so, a legit question.
[INST] I left the bar early last week without getting that last beer. I’ll throw 10$ in some puts. It’s all going down the toilet anyways. [/INST] $10?? Comon be a man and at least throw $100.
[INST] Of course, Belgrade is near and dear to my heart But you know that the official US government explanation is that the 'coordinates were programmed incorrectly'? If we are to believe that, then which retarded intern did they hire to input those coordinates? [/INST] You do realize that Raytheon has no part in programming coordinates right? They just sell the missiles.
[INST] That MU and AMD go up enough that I wont have to go to the suicide booth [/INST] thinking about buying a few shares, and some 9.72 calls
[INST] Yea, Im not selling anything I don't have the collateral for until I totally get it. So far just buying and reselling calls/puts and selling some small covered calls. [/INST] You have to sell a call and a put to set up an iron condor. I think that's what he was referring to.
[INST] Cia or fsb can now make you die in tragic software error in public rather than quietly in your house. [/INST] haha, oh shit, you're right And then Elon Musk will publicly argue with your grieving widow about it
[INST] How do you know? [/INST] Caz there aren’t any other alternatives to it. Hospitals are begging for this shit. Fda is bitching about how they cut corners not about how effective the drug
[INST] Talk to me when they drop a bomb on your house, you fucking king of all delusional faggots. [/INST] Sounds like it's *your* house that needs a little Freedom Rain
[INST] buy calls sub 10, buy puts at 15, works 60% of the time everytime [/INST] Doesn’t this work like, every-time so far?
[INST] This is coming. I just don't know if it is this week. The Chinese response will be nasty. [/INST] Nah I doubt it. We'll start talking about a trade agreement with China soon, that's why TPP was brought back to life. I'd bet that Xi & Trump already figured out the terms and all the tarriff bs is just to make both look good when none of them actually happen and we get a trade agreement signed by both.
[INST] For now.... [/INST] Yeah then they go down and go boom
[INST] Isn't debt just money in reverse? [/INST] In the set of all real numbers yes. Wait until we get imaginary money with polar coordinates. Oh wait, this is WSB, we do.
[INST] Good alternative! [/INST] If you shred it into ribbons, it’ll be fettucine.
[INST] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qN80_7rNmcE [/INST] This is everything lol
[INST] What would such a device be called? I want to look this shit up it sounds fascinating. [/INST] > forced to carry around and listen to the 'beeping lantern' all day....
[INST] Why did they get the car in the first place? [/INST] Fucking stupid amirite. /s because I know the autists here don't understand what it's like to be anything other than themselves
[INST] What products would be used by this sub? [/INST] Things that expire 1 week from purchase.
[INST] Yeah I always want more retards in the market. [/INST] Tesla shares don't buy themselves
[INST] no the idea is the money used for war is not invested while the war is going on so you always end up with a net loss even if you win. [/INST] tell that to your local nuclear power station.
[INST] How can he sell his ideas now?!? [/INST] Brb, selling my new strategy, it's called the tree fiddy signal.
[INST] I am not touching futures in this fucking market... maybe next year. [/INST] Next year? I thought we canceled next year.... heh.
[INST] Strategy still works. Will keep it going. [/INST] Show me your returns from January - April.
[INST] lmao got May 18 calls. hope nuclear wall doesnt break out this week [/INST] Is trump gonna make a nuclear wall now! Mexico doesn’t stand a chance.
[INST] no this is patrick [/INST] Solid ER reference.
[INST] Could someone read this for me? [/INST] You'll probably learn more if you read it yourself.
[INST] $200k savings and 401k, was up to $2.5M prior to $MU earnings [/INST] incidentally, 2.5M is now the diameter of his anus
[INST] Isn’t he asking to be the neutral party himself? [/INST] No. He wants to see what was taken as well, but he doesn't expect to be the 3rd party.
[INST] Someone flair this guy as taint team leader [/INST] Taint Actual
[INST] What if I told you,thomas sowell was a marxist until his late twenties ? Because Of him I wont be. [/INST] Name checks out
[INST] I have puts and I can almost guarantee that Trump will tweet something stupid between now and open that will allow me to exit them without too much of a loss. [/INST] You (and I) have 15 minutes.
[INST] whatever. hope AMD hits $20 EOW [/INST] 4/27 calls are my major play. I have some 4/20 calls, but I'm a bit less optimistic.
[INST] Do you know why they drop? [/INST] I am not sure
[INST] Yup exactly. They run from socialism and then run to those evil capitalist countries. [/INST] Where are all the Swedes running to?
[INST] Why [/INST] Just for shits and giggles
[INST] Worse, 12 incher in the diarrhea [/INST] Pitch or catch?
[INST] I love bringing up how there was actually a grain of truth in that. A Berkeley professor published a study that found frogs that were exposed to a specific pesticide were exhibiting hermaphroditism or were chemically castrated by the chemical’s effect on their hormones. The pesticide was being used commercially in the United States and was ending up in the water supply in high concentrations. So the water actually was doing gay shit to the frogs. [/INST] The grain of truth is not enough to make that shit sandwich palatable.
[INST] Can confirm. Am faggot. [/INST] Too many smokers... All this second hand is getting too much attention.
[INST] Crap. Maybe I can buy Hooked on Phonics if the market finishes green today. [/INST] I laffed big time tho, great gif
[INST] TBF, autistic missiles would be terrifying. [/INST] Why would you afraid of missiles that spend whole day watching anime and draws Sonic OC?
[INST] This. A line of credit is not an emergency fund, pal. If you think it is that’s why you’re reading wsb and complaining about being poor. When you missed your last option and used your CC to pay it off? That makes you an idiot. I play with about 5% of my stack just because it’s fun, but the rest is an index fund. Guess what? The index fund almost always does better than me. 🤷🏻‍♂️ [/INST] That's my point numb nuts.
[INST] Oh crap French dip, he's bombing France next. Au jus... it'll be Anjou [/INST] Haha funny joke man. Ur so clever.
[INST] Most people don't have the nuts to YOLO with their piss pot savings. We have not only the courage to YOLO, we have the autism to YOLO FDs. [/INST] Damn it feels good to be a banker!
[INST] I bought AMD @ $1.8 and NVDA @ $20. No rocket science any faggot could've done that. [/INST] AMD to $100 in a few years. I'm all in!
[INST] Many trades were shorts. [/INST] Why does your chart end right before shit hit the fan then?
[INST] >wait you can make money trading Everyone but you. [/INST] I uhh. I am also making negative money.
[INST] Yeah, that makes more sense. [/INST] No keep arguing
[INST] In fact every business starts up without money. When you have market and an idea you just need structure and the money *will* come. Drive and ambition is the game of the name. [/INST] That's....not how it works.
[INST] Well people who have a shitty track record are useful in the sense that you just do the opposite of what they recommend lol [/INST] True true. Ha.
[INST] Hey, you know I open and close trades within minutes right? how do you explain this then? https://i.imgur.com/LNF8nj2.png [/INST] What does that have to do with you saying 'Monday wont be green' on Friday? Did you actually just mean to say there will be some small periods of time when the price will go down? That's always true on every day. Fucking retarded either way.
[INST] :( [/INST] Just kidding! But seriously OP, get on Bumble instead.
[INST] I exaggerated of course, but holy crap owning a business there must be awful. [/INST] Yes it must suck for people to not have to live to work unless they want to.
[INST] Is that what we are calling ourselves? [/INST] Investing makes up the large majority of my portfolio. I only actively trade with a small part of it.
[INST] Congrats! My BAC are fucked ... and so are my XLFs but I'll hold because it think the ER run will continue and most of the shorter term will get fucked. Probably end up getting fucked by theta though lol. [/INST] I wouldn’t count BAC out so soon, charts and earnings look good. JPM is crap in comparison and will recover with ease. Let everyone who thinks it is all priced in do what they do, then make your move.
[INST] Avengers Infinity and Solo will be the reason to hold the calls. [/INST] And they are mega leaps, so I got that going for me
[INST] Hey, ToshiyaHariGSAnalyst, just a quick heads-up: **curiousity** is actually spelled **curiosity**. You can remember it by **-os- in the middle**. Have a nice day! ^^^^The ^^^^parent ^^^^commenter ^^^^can ^^^^reply ^^^^with ^^^^'delete' ^^^^to ^^^^delete ^^^^this ^^^^comment. [/INST] I like any and all spelling nazi bots
[INST] What is with ya'll niggas and Robin Hood. Do you guys really not have 5 bucks for a trade on Etrade? You guys act like before robin hood the small guy couldn't buy stocks or something. [/INST] First of all what I wrote was meant as a joke. Second, you do realize some folks out there does thousands of not tens of thousands of trades per year right?
[INST] >did he pay no *actually srs they were probably compd to him by Putin personally* [/INST] You never pay for that sort of thing yourself
[INST] How did you determine it had a 5% chance of hitting? How did you apply the Gaussian to get the probability? [/INST] Sweet Jesus don't do candlestick trading
[INST] Lower PT [/INST] That has a seeking alpha news article and I didn't get it. And couldn't find it. That sucks as I was out driving my dad for doctors appts all morning as it tanked... coulda used the heads up notice like I normally get from them. Oh well. And thank you. I see it now.
[INST] > bailing out their mm buddies [/INST] In what sense? There is so much shit written about this that I can hardly decipher what is fact anymore...
[INST] Fine I'm sure, his proof ends in January for unrelated reasons. [/INST] He said he did 30% short trades. Since we are still shitposting (I hope), I spent some time ignoring my professor and drawing lines. In the time I spent doing that I found where his 30% went. https://imgur.com/uEDQzJB I forgot to write how many green lines I had, but it is like 49 I think.
[INST] may 7th [/INST] considering they ALWAYS report after market on tuesdays, im gonna go with no. may 1st is the most likely date by far.
[INST] It only helps your business if your business isn't doing well. If your business isn't doing well you should be investing that money elsewhere. [/INST] its not much of an investment to put a tweet out
[INST] Do you have 10 years experience and finally showing gains within the last 6 months? [/INST] I've outperformed the indexes for the past 5 days. With a stellar track record like that I can't see why you'd need to look any further back.
[INST] Lmao 70% loss and you're proud [/INST] Are you ok? So between my Robinhood picture and this, I'm at a loss huh? https://imgur.com/a/YkrDH and https://imgur.com/a/daNrc
[INST] Ok so social media, as far as you think, doesn't affect you. What if it does, how can you know it hasn't influenced you? But anyway, I've been to plenty of restaurants/stores/events because of FBs 'friends near you are going to <x>'. >everyone is too lazy to run a proper company/business. it's really not that hard Ok go do it then lmao [/INST] Says social media doesn't effect them then lists how they use social media to drive business decisions... Wut?
[INST] > Colgate. They are the number one? [/INST] Correct.
[INST] You get what you pay for. [/INST] lolol too cheap to pay the $7 in commission with a real broker on a tasty $1k profit FD Stay stupid folks
[INST] Where are all the Swedes running to? [/INST] Sweden in a capitalist economy. They have a stock market too.
[INST] President Trump wants the market to do amazing because when he goes for a speech he could say look what I did! But he also promised to fight “unfair trade” and currency manipulators, so if he goes soft on them that’ll be a weak spot in future debates for him, and the GOP, so that’s why he’ll say things like “what’s good for business isn’t always good for the market” (which can be true) so he can use that as an “out” if someone attacks the market performance during his term. [/INST] do you, in all seriousness, believe his thought process to be that elaborate?
[INST] Isnt that an amazon delivery driver? [/INST] No, they dropped an unscheduled package of another kind.
[INST] Peak efficiency [/INST] Pee efficiency is off the charts!
[INST] Just for shits and giggles [/INST] Good reason. P.S. i have explosive diareha.
[INST] In the 1400s or really any time before early 1800s how was the world *not* a zero sum? You're claiming it was? What am I missing? Actually kind of curious. Not saying you're wrong. [/INST] If we say the metric was food production then this means that you can only get more production by taking it away from someone else. This can't be true because you always can just plant more crops as long as you have space. Also agriculture has constantly changed throughout history [wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_agriculture#Europe).
[INST] 1.03^80= 10 you can tentuple your money [/INST] And that assumes no leverage too.
[INST] Loss leader. Loss leader. Loss leader. Anti-monopoly partnership with Intel for the sole purpose of keeping AMD alive. [/INST] They aren't losing money on ps4, or Xbox sales lol.
[INST] Porque no los dos? [/INST] ¡Eso si que es!
[INST] Better check the news [/INST] News? This is TSLA we are talking about. Production halt means the stock will go up 10% tomorrow.
[INST] I have some 4-20 puts that would appreciate that [/INST] July calls ah yess
[INST] No! [/INST] Bad bot
[INST] Can’t you just yell out, “Mommmm! Bucket!” Like everyone else here? [/INST] 'moommmmmm! The buckets full and I need more tendies!'
[INST] This subreddit has decaying since inception, as it was designed to. Please read prospectus or SEC will deslist us. [/INST] It's different this time!
[INST] TO UNLOCK BATHROOM PLEASE DRINK VERIFICATION CAN [/INST] Doritos® Dew™ It Right
[INST] Sweden in a capitalist economy. They have a stock market too. [/INST] So does China and they are actually communist. Since when is socialism and capitalism mutually exclusive?
[INST] I got out of my Tesla short today. [/INST] I got in today... some people are just more unlucky than others... F
[INST] because boomers want to leave behind a legacy of shit on every single front [/INST] Seriously, fuck boomers. I hate paying for their SS when I won’t get any of it. Fucking cucks.
[INST] > 350m in debt when its expected to top 1bn in revenue 1bn in revenue doesn't mean anything until it's converted to profit, and /u/hugokhf might sound like a baby back bitch but he's absolutely right about the debt issue. SQ is a monster in terms of growth *right now*, but it's a very dangerous long term asset because of it's debt (dilution risk), profitability (or lack thereof), and not to mention competition. [/INST] 350 million to R&D though.
[INST] Faggot's delight. [/INST] Why are they faggots delight? Cuz risk is high?
[INST] Bull put spread? Does that mean you sold puts? [/INST] Yeah, as well as buying puts at a lower strike to limit the downside. Also called a credit spread.
[INST] Might as well hook them up to become bio-batteries to power the machines. [/INST] TSLA is already working on something like that I hear.
[INST] Anyone have a couch I can crash on for a while... [/INST] Why don't you use $V puts to buy yourself a couch?
[INST] FTSE100 enjoy trendies especially with brexit. [/INST] You mean FTSE250 if you want to short British companies.
[INST] Up 3.22% today. My autistic powers are growing. [/INST] Stahp
[INST] How many people do you know have actually “cancelled” Netflix. That $12 means so little to people they’ll keep their subscriptions for just one or two shows they like. I do agree they’re over peak growth in NA; there just aren’t enough people left. However as Africa and Asia get better internet, Netflix could really take off on those continents. [/INST] Lol Africa investing in infrastructure lol
[INST] And that assumes no leverage too. [/INST] Leverage doesn’t increase your ROI...
[INST] All cars by 2022, did you not read the first paragraph? [/INST] U right
[INST] The difference being is that those are easily accessible at any time while MoviePass requires you to actually go to the movie, an activity which people are doing less and less every year. The best case scenario is that they get a decent amount of subscribers initially on hype, then gradually begin losing subscribers for the rest of their short life as a company. [/INST] So you could still YOLO on it then!!!! BTW is it for real there's less people going to the movies every year? If you know any sources please share. It seems like every year the big blockbusters are making more and more money
[INST] Well, start by getting personal information, then get him balls deep in margin leveraged, low probability, low payout options, then take out a sizable insurance policy, then get him to 'second mortgage the house to double down and make up the losses'. When the inevitable happens ($ROPE), profit. [/INST] genius, just have him do retarded level options spreads risking $50000000 to make $0.05