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[INST] BEAR BEAR BEAR BEAR BEAR [/INST] 👌
[INST] >>you get the nuts 🥜 [/INST] [Right now I get the sprinkles](https://youtu.be/uBiY2fMeM1U?t=14s).
[INST] This explained options better than my text book. [/INST] But did you see the part about McDonald's buttermilk tenders and creamy ranch sauce? I put that shit in there twice because I *really* want buttermilk tenders right now.
[INST] There are still bids on options after hours. [/INST] Not on illiquid options.
[INST] I’m new here - this is normal, right? [/INST] Just wait for the rainbow cocks.
[INST] Sorry man. But isn't my post the essence of WSB? Taking a cash advance on a CC for Yolo option plays is what this sub was aall about I thought. [/INST] But you’re not supposed to make money. (I am joking by the way—congrats on your gains)
[INST] You should also understand that these options expired at the end of the trading day today. So if FB went down they would expired worthless and you'd be out that $1100 with no option to hold for a recovery like normal stocks. (I don't know what I'm talking about, but want to learn. Fastest way to learn is to post something incorrect and have people correct you) [/INST] Lol truth
[INST] strong point [/INST] Strongest point
[INST] What the hell is he even doing to that marshmallow? [/INST] Molesting it
[INST] bullshit, I make most of my money selling on eBay. you only get two fees, a listing fee, and a final sale fee. After that paypal charges, you like 30 cents [/INST] Aight we’ll fuck you den
[INST] so selling SPY to buy DIA would be fine given that it's a different index? [/INST] Yes. Even spy for spx works
[INST] Can confirm. Got cucked. [/INST] Sold early i got lucky tbh
[INST] That is because he nailed the intern before she put on weight. [/INST] banging the intern is dignified. pornstars, not so much. the evangelicals don't seem to care though.
[INST] Nope, Bought a girl I was dating handcuffs and teased her by tossing one of the keys out the window. Was funny for like 15 seconds. [/INST] According to your grammar, you bought a human woman while you were dating a pair of handcuffs. Correct?
[INST] Let's cut the bullshit and estimate 19-20k [/INST] 39-40k seems a bit light, don't you think?
[INST] Yeah I wouldn't take advice from him. I only take advice from WSB [/INST] I make my own advice but this fucker is messing up my investment plans
[INST] Buying a Tesla is more like buying an option of a car that never materialises due to counterparty risk. [/INST] Seeing as you can literally wire them $250,000 today for a car that not only doesn't exist but doesn't even have a delivery date...
[INST] That's one opinion. [/INST] What are some others?
[INST] A [/INST] N
[INST] Exactly. How could anyone actually prove if their purchase caused the price to move? [/INST] Well... they won’t since they’re part of the quote. A non marketable round lot gets routed to an exchange... hence a maker-taker payment gets involved.
[INST] You know Trump has his eye on that bump... [/INST] The Bolton War bump?
[INST] Before, I actually shorted it too early when it was still being pumped up and was getting killed. I knew, as much as one can, it would go down so I maxed out my CC to buy more puts on Friday. [/INST] Champ
[INST] Yeah. I'm never going to trust my life to an auto-pilot. [/INST] Knowingly.
[INST] Calm down I didn’t say Ally savings account [/INST] That's r/personalfinance
[INST] yeah unsubbed [/INST] If this cures the cancer that is wsb im fucking out of this bitch
[INST] Could have made a lot more than just 10x gains with a time machine [/INST] You’re underestimating how dumb he is.
[INST] Judging by the posts here, people are swinging options like they would be equities on a regular basis; myself included. It worked in 2017. 2018 is a different story so far, haha. [/INST] 2018 has been volatile af so far man. I actually put 1000 in my robinhood right before the market started bouncing so hard. Ended up just putting into my employers stock.
[INST] Dude, there are ways to gamble but WTF. [/INST] Yeah, I had some of that,'My first options making a huge profit' luck and I got a little crazy.
[INST] Idk man we've had like 4 recessions since february [/INST] I know you've had 4 recessions, but would you like another? -the market next week.
[INST] Id bet power steering failures are considered a safety concern to most people. No shit it's voluntary, so was my 2002 Honda Accord i bought as my first car that had a airbag recall. But I still didn't like knowing that a main component of my vehicle has been proven to be less reliable than I had believed. Glad you're sticking to your guns, but just like last year your $400 target is wildly off mark IMO. [/INST] Incorrect. Power steering is not a safety issue. You can disconnect the power steering system on any car and drive it indefinitely without issue. Simply false to say it's a safety issue.
[INST] I actually did pretty well this week Can’t lose money if you don’t play the market I knew it was gonna be trading sideways all week and I can’t day trade for shit I’m expecting the same next week. Even maybe touch the 200 day. But the week afterwards, we should finally rocket back up through the 100 day and 50 day. And then at some point we wil fucking crash again (look at summer of 2015) [/INST] April 10th we pivot
[INST] Autistic is a more accurate word [/INST] Just like the market can go up, down, or sideways there’s only three ways a person can go... straight, gay, and asexual. I think this falls in the last category Edit: and definitely really dumb who uses the Dow anyway lol price weighted index
[INST] For real. This is literally like any automotive recalls. Make an appointment at the dealer or service center, drop off your car for 1-3 hours, and you're good to go. My Acura had a similar recall like this a few months ago. Baddabing baddaboom Should have no material impact whatsoever. [/INST] the difference is that Acura probably makes more than 3 cars per month
[INST] Big strength holding the 200 and shorts needing to cover EOM. Was a recipe for a squeeze today. Shoulda loaded more calls. [/INST] Well if there is gonna be such support around 258, then I might as well go full tilt 50 calls at the money Monday right? I guess it's going to slowly slowly rally back up then.. I might just do it. That is the point of WSB anyway right.
[INST] With that saved money from today, I guess you can have party and alcohol tonight [/INST] I was gonna do that anyway hahaha
[INST] youre getting a bj tonight. [/INST] > youre ~~getting~~ giving a bj tonight.
[INST] What's your downside risk? $2000 a contract? Shit this might be a decent yolo. [/INST] $1800 per if he's selling them for $200/ea
[INST] Short GPRO [/INST] nah bro the whole point is to avoid the short squeeze
[INST] It depends on what time frame you are trying to trade on.. [/INST] If you want a dank trade then 420d RSI
[INST] Yes. This will be my first big options play. [/INST] If you don't mind, what strike and date are you looking at?
[INST] $182 last year, thinking about going back in if it dips to $250ish [/INST] Probably should find a different slot machine
[INST] Oof, sorry dude hope you got cash to buy some 1 /19s with me [/INST] What strike after you eyeing up
[INST] Yes it is? You pay taxes on the gains you made in a year. Of course you get to substract your losses, otherwise many option strategies wouldn't even be possible. The big trouble starts if you made big % and don't set aside money on the first day in a new year. Because if you tank your account now, you still owe those taxes. [/INST] That’s if they’re realized. If Apple is down 10%, I’m not selling that shit just to lower my tax bill
[INST] Pepto bismol bro. [/INST] Immodium is better
[INST] long anxiety [/INST] Straddle anxiety
[INST] Thats fucking hilarious. Do i get a wsb badge now? [/INST] Fuck I think you're a mod now
[INST] ^This. Still a chance for the next 9/11 or Iran/Syria/Israel/Russian/Saudi/Turkey War. [/INST] If another 9/11 happens nobody is going to rally around Trump his approval will drop even more and it might actually help remove him from office because if we're going to actual war the last person either side wants (except russia) is Trump in charge.
[INST] Or maybe you're a pussy and not realized the spirit of wsb. Go big or go home fucker. [/INST] Buying AMD is significantly in the spirit of WSB. Not every play has to be balls-deep OTM calls or some shit.
[INST] More tendies, more weight. You don't want to be skinny like a poor, do you? [/INST] You're right. I think it's time I upped my game.
[INST] I [/INST] F
[INST] As a shareholder, I got the opportunity to vote for the directors and whatnot, one of the things to vote for was doubling the amount of shares from 1.25 to 2.5 billion. Not sure how to post proof of that. Also, technically it has not passed yet [/INST] Ah ok its not passed
[INST] Yes. Inflation is about 2%. Ally sits out about 0.5% below that If you just sit money in there for 50 years losing 0.5% every year, you lose about a quarter of your value. Not only is it not safe; you straight up *guarantee* that the value of your savings will drop over time with compound interest working against them. [/INST] So what do you suggest people do with money they need in the foreseeable future?
[INST] I've never had a problem with aliexpress. I thought this sub is for risk takers. [/INST] And I thought this sub was for retards that knew they were retarded, but here you fucking are, thinking you aren't.
[INST] Next couple weeks should be good for calls imo. Especially monday. [/INST] If I see it going up, I'll drop my short, open up some puts at the new high, and open up 5-10 more calls.. I can't figure out if they are gonna take it to new highs or not. I still think SPX to 3000 at some point to be honest. Could take awhile.
[INST] The six months it takes you to realized 'I {married, elected} a piece of shit'. [/INST] Obama's lasted less than 6 months.
[INST] Reagan also went up. Nixon was on track to but turns out people really disapproved of water gate [/INST] > Nixon was on track to but turns out people really disapproved of water gate Turns out people trusted the media back then, watergate wouldn't even blip approval ratings these days. Obama proved that after Fast and Furious.
[INST] Had a buddy who shorted trump to buy Hillary and jeb or Cruz (can’t remember) at some point during the nomination process. It was the equivalent of all inning xiv except he wasn’t autistic and only bet what he was willing to lose. [/INST] Dude everyone was convinced Hillary was inevitably going to win since like 2013, it was 'conventional wisdom' but like all conventional wisdom is fucking retarded as it turned out.
[INST] No dude apple took an especially HUGE shit. [/INST] it did the same thing to me the other day, i was up like 1500 and then down 3k over like an hour
[INST] How bout them amzn tendies? [/INST] Trump reeeee. Bezo will still take me to the moon.
[INST] Except they do make a *gross* profit on every single vehicle. What happens when you sell more of something that makes money when you sell it? [/INST] > What happens when you sell more of something that makes money when you sell it? Should I repost all the charts again for you?
[INST] I too am investing in some MM tickets [/INST] Mine always expire worthless. Just like my options
[INST] Them, not we [/INST] Oh you mean 'them' got to keep more of their money? Or do you also mean that Small Business owners who get taxed at the same rate as corporations? You do realize that high taxation hurts small businss the most because they cannot afford to hire an army of accountants.
[INST] Spoiler alert. It’s a double ended dildo [/INST] Nu-uhh, fake news
[INST] $9? [/INST] Since you've posted moved to $8
[INST] I have those dreams too where it’s like I can’t get it into OP’s mom’s butt no matter what I do even tho his dad is there trying to help guide it in with his mouth but it just keeps not quite getting in enough to stay in It is really stressful. I wake up in a cold sweat every time. So yeah I sympathize OP [/INST] #smalldickproblems
[INST] If it dropped to 51.60 AH wouldnt the 52 puts be ITM and be exercised or does it need to be by a certain time? [/INST] I heard options expire an hour before market close. Not sure though. Might be totally wrong.
[INST] Yea this will probably mirror Snapchat performance [/INST] Spotify has 100M paying subs
[INST] Speculation always works, doesn’t it? ;) [/INST] Yeah buying the rumors never work....;)
[INST] Shout out to jimmy carter for being the worst president ever [/INST] Litterally the worst. Had to fuckin ration gas. In developed America with no major war
[INST] Look at his hair and tell me he cares about looking dignified. [/INST] touche
[INST] This makes me laugh. Why? [/INST] Because the EU (read: Germany) is keeping Italy afloat by buying their shit debt.
[INST] Fuck, you got me there. Carry on. [/INST] He didn’t get YOU u/KGB_INC
[INST] I think the cars are profitable on a gross profit basis. Actually I read the margins are better than other luxury brands (BMW, Mercedes, etc) Of course, ignoring your R&D and CapEx doesnt mean they aren't costs... [/INST] Tesla doesn't include R&D and distribution costs in their margins (unlike the other auto companies). You aren't comparing apples to apples with those margins.
[INST] If it cuts out while you’re driving at highway speed you wouldn’t even notice until you slowed down. If it cuts out at low speed your steering would just feel a little heavier. This is not a safety issue. If it was the NHTSB would be all up Tesla’s ass about it and it wouldn’t be a voluntary recall. [/INST] Go outside and turn your car wheel to the left with the engine off. Now come back inside and fuck yourself.
[INST] Which library do I include to call the drown function? [/INST] it's included in the WSB SDK
[INST] YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND. I AM A PROFITABLE BUSINESS [/INST] When you build the biggest factory in the world how can you be profitable right away? Spending 4 billion dollars on a factory that will take another half year to year to get into production burns a lot of cash. Again, believe whatever you want, but you clearly have no understanding on Tesla or space x.
[INST] F [/INST] U
[INST] Good news: they're about to unlock again! [/INST] Fist the chastity beat , next the world
[INST] R [/INST] B
[INST] Woah sick burn bro [/INST] That’s brah, bro
[INST] Graham says that in The Intellitarded investor [/INST] Graham also would never have invested in Amazon CUZ DUH PE IS TOO DERN HAI
[INST] If I see it going up, I'll drop my short, open up some puts at the new high, and open up 5-10 more calls.. I can't figure out if they are gonna take it to new highs or not. I still think SPX to 3000 at some point to be honest. Could take awhile. [/INST] Who knows. This week was a total shit show. The strength at the 200 is reassuring the possibility of a collapse is slim. Entire week was just a bunch of fear mongering bullshit. I’m guessing some institutions were loading heavy on calls in anticipation for next month. Throwing shit out their media portals to drive it down for cheap prices.
[INST] You brought it on yourself bud. [/INST] no u
[INST] tbf Kobe has more money than just about everyone [/INST] 2nd richest laker all time.
[INST] > ABC recovering weeb stupid faggot weeb reporting in what's abc recovering weeb mean for retards like myself [/INST] an american born chinese that used too watch too much anime
[INST] Oh good. We can fund more illegals now. Just what we need. [/INST] Fuck social security for our citizens. Let's give all that money to the illegals. Nobody really wants to retire anyways.
[INST] What fucked you this hard? My guess is that you panic sold like during the correction and maybe just picked some really risky shit? [/INST] Ciber going bankrupt Fucked me the hardest.
[INST] holy shit, in a bull market too?? wtf did u buy [/INST] That's what I am wondering too since he said little over a year! Could have held on to anything and still made money.
[INST] Do you think that TSLA could be acquired for greater than $50/share? That seems like the biggest risk to your thesis. [/INST] It doesn’t matter, unless that owner can buy enough to overrule Elon, swallow multiple poison pills (they’ve got a golden parachute a few others I recall, making them a poor takeover target), and is willing to sink in another $2 billion dollars into the company to keep it afloat. The stock is worthless after they file for chapter 11, it is owned by the creditors at that point.
[INST] 'I'll give you 2 shiny rocks for that chicken egg.' [/INST] *mutant chicken egg
[INST] San Andreas [/INST] Escape from LA.
[INST] I was gonna do that anyway hahaha [/INST] TOGA TOGA TOGA TOOOOGAAA
[INST] Times sure have changed. *Or have they?* [/INST] was that a silicon valley (tv series) reference? I think gavin belson had a line like that...
[INST] Straddle anxiety [/INST] i'm doing an iron xanax right now ... might have to hedge with some adderall soon to be functional
[INST] Dude everyone was convinced Hillary was inevitably going to win since like 2013, it was 'conventional wisdom' but like all conventional wisdom is fucking retarded as it turned out. [/INST] Hilary won by a land slide... in the states that didn’t matter like cali and lost in the ones that did like Florida
[INST] Kind of what I was thinking, there's been a lot milked out but between LFIN and RIOT there's still room above zero. You gonna short again or just buy puts? [/INST] For these types of stocks I always short. I only buy puts for something I need the leverage on, for an expensive stock like TSLA, TREE or AMZN.
[INST] Nah idk. Big headline risk with them, and as for LFIN I'd agree if lower strikes hadn't been written. This past week the lowest you could buy were the 17.5s, now you can go as low as 2.5. [/INST] I dont think they go much lower. Sellers exhausting themselves.
[INST] Well that's very different from what he said. Not like this would be the first time I see this sentiment on Reddit. As someone who grew up in Russia and living in the us this is very disappointing. [/INST] Well given how Russia is conducting such a large and far reaching covert operation to undermine the stability of the western world, and the amount of coverage it's getting right now, it's hard to interpret it as racism and not anti-russian state. That's why the downvotes. However, given the above mentioned operation, it's also not unreasonable for Americans to be suspicious of any and everything russian. I know it's going to suck for you and I'm sorry about that. Blame Putin.
[INST] Honestly yall upvote too much. [/INST] Seriously. >Teehee guys Tesla wow I'll buy it with my retirement money! Wow what a risky move I'm so quirky for being retarded
[INST] Here you go idiot: https://hightimes.com/news/mitch-mcconnell-proposes-bill-legalize-industrial-hemp/ [/INST] Do you realize that McConnell is a republican?