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407,700 | I like it better when the second half is "given enough time it thinks about itself." | {
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407,701 | Well, it was his *fifth* complaint of sexual assault, and the arresting and conviction were done by the Feds, not the local tin stars. | {
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407,702 | A lot of people think he's seriously NFL-Ready. Saw a comment on here yesterday with like 20 + upvotes saying he has the "release of Dan Marino". Like fuckin' seriously? | {
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407,703 | I didn't realize it was this bad either. I thought the same as you. I thought rodeos only consisted of bull and horse riding too and that most of the injuries happened to the riders... My heart is broken right now. | {
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407,704 | ***WELCOME TO THE INTERNET*** | {
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407,705 | Awww, I don't mean to laugh but keeping a second tube is hilarious. | {
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407,706 | That's why they're sparks and not fire. | {
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407,707 | That was kinda my point | {
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407,708 | In all fairness, Age of Empires II was overwhelmingly awesome back then. | {
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407,709 | "Shut the fuck up, Walter. Lettuce me die in peas" | {
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407,710 | Alright boys here are the results of NS Agh, Shapeshift, Arctic burn, and luna's passive (not sure if it does give more vision or not).\n\nhttp://imgur.com/a/4LbhI | {
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407,711 | Nice find, pretty interesting. | {
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407,712 | And *final crescendo* | {
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407,713 | "I don't know how you caught that" "*I see everything*" | {
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407,714 | That is some final destination shit right there, son. | {
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407,715 | /s for serious I presume. I'm new here /sorry. | {
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407,716 | It's even more than that, it's the type of floor that is build on springs which makes you jump way higher...\n\nSource: I did acrobatic gymnastic for 10 years... | {
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407,717 | If a girl told me that, I'm pretty sure I'd have to try sticking it in her nose. Just to be a contrarian. | {
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407,718 | **Haha! That's from a show I like!** | {
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407,719 | "I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be."\n\n-Douglas Adams | {
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407,720 | Baby Pterodactylus. I'd grab that motherfucker by the wings and shake it to death.\n\nOr...a brontosaurus because they only eat plants and wouldn't suspect me when I crawled up on it's head and stabbed it in the brain with my primitive stabbing tool. | {
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407,721 | Dude I'm pretty sure that is just a regular mini. | {
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407,722 | Well, I'm not subscribed to /wtf | {
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407,723 | It's a thing EVERYWHERE. The other day I dropped the soap in my own shower. I never picked it up. | {
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407,724 | (obligatory J. Edgar Hoover joke) | {
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407,725 | You seem pretty defensive about this "girly" thing | {
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407,726 | He is an alcoholic savant.... | {
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407,727 | The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again... | {
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407,728 | No it isn't. Because this time they made it look like it's in gmail. | {
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407,729 | I also went on a first date to Borat. On the contrary to your experience, my date and I were howling with laughter throughout the whole thing. Sexy times were had afterwards as well. Very nice, great success. | {
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407,730 | Fucking CNN already had their 'reality check' team , which was shockingly missing at the RNC, calling Clinton's speech inaccurate because Clinton said that Obama reversed the economy like him, but Obama has less progress because the economy was worse. Their reason? Obama's recovery has been slower. Exactly what Clinton said, but they try to spin it as a lie so they can keep their 'both parties lie during the conventions' false equivalency bullshit line going. | {
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407,731 | People die if they are killed. | {
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407,732 | They brought them back here in Michigan.\n\nSource: ate a bowl this morning.\n\nEdit: Check Target people, that's the only place I've been.. Although I would imagine Meijers/Krogers probably has them too.\n\n[EDIT 2: Bonus picture of my buddy eating an entire box on his break.](http://i.imgur.com/K5OEEJq.jpg).. Yes, he did eat the whole box in ~20 minutes | {
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407,733 | "Carol, we need to cook"\n\n-Sam | {
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407,734 | From those of us still in 3/31, thanks for the reminder. | {
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407,735 | That did not even cross my mind. I'm stoned and have pretty much decided cake is a conspiracy of the pastry industry. | {
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407,736 | :D \n\nD:\n\n:D\n\nD: | {
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407,737 | Quite often, yes. and Yes, Canadian.\n\nLast winter, I built an ice rink on top of a mountain. Molson Canadian saw it on my Instagram, and licensed my footage. [They build a campaign around it.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw8C3b_Vj2k)\n\n[My original footage.](http://instagram.com/p/wpfxOLAdOf/?modal=true) | {
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407,738 | DON'T DO IT, IF YOU STILL HAVE FAITH IN HUMANITY, I REPEAT DON'T DO IT! | {
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407,739 | > And what happens if I drink it..\n\nEvolution. | {
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407,740 | Hehe, whoops. Censorship fail as a whole on my part. | {
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407,741 | I am pregnant. This is now my goal. | {
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407,742 | Microscopic Martians would be one of the if not the greatest discovery in human history. | {
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407,743 | That depends on what an abortion costs near you ;) | {
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407,744 | Why would they put it in baggage when everyone is ready to go home. I would think they would put it in the terminal so people waiting around can play. \n | {
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407,745 | my friend said i don't know what irony means, which is ironic because it was raining at the time. | {
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407,746 | your username leads me to believe it wouldn't work out well for you. | {
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407,747 | I was actually feeling sad for the bf cause he's too stupid to realize his woman is cheating on him. | {
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407,748 | Unless you're black. Then you'd get arrested. | {
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407,749 | Yeah it is ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) | {
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407,750 | Franky, they should just do paternity tests on every newborn and be done with it. | {
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407,751 | Why has this not received more upvotes!?!?! | {
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407,752 | With each episode he seems to be becoming the idea guy and the only one with any heart left. | {
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407,753 | Man, why am I never pranked like this? | {
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407,754 | Guess who doesn't give a shit. | {
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407,755 | > ...cable pasta...\n> ...productivity camo...\n\nCompSci student here, that is some useful jargon! Will use myself. | {
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407,756 | As an Italian in NY for 2 weeks, the things I missed more are a good mozzarella and the bidet. I felt like a barbarian not having one, and holy shit you can't understand how much I needed it. | {
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407,757 | What if Alec Baldwin is suicidal and has plans to kill himself on the 4th.\n\n...\n\nThis kid is a hero! | {
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407,758 | You see what you want, that's for sure. | {
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407,759 | The weird part is how little they know about the physiological purpose of sleep in our and other species. | {
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407,760 | /u/birdskulls is Niko Bellic. | {
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407,761 | Oh my god I'm so sorry. Do you remember your childhood having a lot of second-rate pancake syrup? | {
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407,762 | *Ooooooooh!*\n\nSay it *again.* | {
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407,763 | Sounds like an inconsiderate jerk to me, he had it coming. | {
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407,764 | Who renames that way? Either use F2 (protip, can use this to mass rename), or click the name of a highlighted icon and then write in the name. \n\nAlso, when creating a shortcut, why would you not right-click-drag-and-drop? Much simpler... | {
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407,765 | That was the time when I really honed my craft. | {
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407,766 | Can't forget about the notorious B.A.C(.O.N.) | {
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407,767 | He does, it's just... hidden. | {
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407,768 | Sounds like you're talking about choosing a dog shampoo. | {
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407,769 | Upmodded for starting a tl;dr post with "Back when the gramophone was invented" | {
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407,770 | 120 dollars cash.\n\nedit: oh and a gps\n\nedit: oh computer stuff.....LOTS of it | {
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407,771 | I'd you'd just quit buying all those socks, you could buy an extra pack of cigarettes every day. | {
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407,772 | I think I would have pee'd a little. lol | {
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407,773 | > ***WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.***\n\n~ *God's Final Message to His Creation, written in letters of fire on the side of the Quentulus Quazgar Mountains.* | {
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407,774 | You're welcome! Please email [email protected] if you have any questions about Tor (outside of this iAmA) and/or need help. | {
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407,775 | God damn, thank you. Far more complicated an issue than either picture represents. | {
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407,776 | yet something about her face says extremely overweight in 10 years | {
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407,777 | In the future apps are called wizzleflaps | {
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407,778 | Hawaiian hotbox is what we call it here, but who gives a fuck, that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. | {
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407,779 | But that argument could be made for anything health related.\nyour "rights" cannot have a monetary value, and it's a slippery slope.\n\nShould not tampons be free for women? Vitamins? quit smoking aids? x-rays, blood tests, MRI's, etc.\n\nYou can argue that pretty much anything "good for you" is your right, but not that your government should pay for it. | {
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407,780 | I totally agree. But you know what's not going to be as popular? My suggestion:\n\nSkip the alcohol, too.\n\nIt's better for you and boy is alcohol expensive. | {
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407,781 | Sounds like a fun saturday afternoon | {
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407,782 | As a white person who grew in a majority-minority, low-income neighborhood I was constantly reminded that I was white by my friends. Being the token white boy did have its advantages, but I do think some of the kids I grew up around would insult my racial heritage in an attempt to to raise their own self esteem. \n\nAlso, after growing up and moving on in the world I did feel was it oddly difficult to assimilate into “white” society. | {
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407,783 | The girl who voiced that character was murdered by her father. Have a nice friday. | {
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407,784 | If it's a camera, calling it a mirror is like calling the front-facing camera on your phone a mirror. | {
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407,785 | Incorrect! Trundle got an animation bugfix as well Q's mana cost lowered from 40->30 in this patch http://leagueoflegends.wikia.com/wiki/V1.0.0.150\n\n(i remember because i did it) | {
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407,786 | TIL that "trap" is a slur against transgendered people. | {
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407,787 | Your job as an improviser is to make the other person look good. It's when you try to make yourself THE MOST AWESOME AND FUNNY PERSON EVER that everything falls apart. | {
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407,788 | And all I got was this 20 piece mcnugget. | {
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407,789 | YOU'RE NOT MY FUCKING MOTHER! | {
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407,790 | I work in the carbonite industry so I'm getting a big kick of out these responses. Carbonite is completely safe! It's an excellent way to be stored. You get to skip long interstellar trips with only the slightest of hibernation sickness when you awaken. | {
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407,791 | Because multiple people "remembered" it when in reality it was dead-air static that the final poster said his mother described. | {
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407,792 | My parents are cousins and I have to say it's hit or miss. I think I turned out alright but my brother is a stupid asshole. | {
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407,793 | Once my cat was best friends with a previous roommate's cat, and the roommate and her cat moved out while my cat and I were out of town. He spent days crying and searching the entire apartment, under / behind furniture for his friend. It was really sad, so I ended up getting him his own forever friend, and they are inseparable! \n\nEdit: Here is a Reddit post with a picture of them http://redd.it/2ro433 | {
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407,794 | At least has potato for eat | {
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407,795 | I set my location to Alaska as a joke and now I can't get it to change back. I'm currently number two in Metal Gear in Alaska. I've only played one game in that topic... and i lost :( | {
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407,796 | I'd love to aim for a more steady sleep pattern, sleeping in the day is even more depressing! I'll give it a go | {
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407,797 | Wipe that shit off your smirk, buddy. | {
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407,798 | Nature's way to get us to mate is awesome. | {
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407,799 | The dude standing two feet away with a giant camera over his shoulder pointing it directly at him probably gives it away. | {
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