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[INST] Jesus Christ 21 for table games, their website says you can play bingo with the old people if you're 18 [/INST] Side action at the bingo tables tho. Like the scene in The Big Short where they explain derivatives.
[INST] I think someone should DM him posing as someone from Vanguard and instruct him they over paid him on his earnings. [/INST] hey, its me, yuor vangar manager!
[INST] Yea, it would dip, but I’m guessing the company is gonna go bankrupt from lawsuits. Hopefully the halt ends before that so folks like us can close out position out. Also, hopefully the halt doesn’t last too long cause we’re burning money on increased borrow fees from our brokers. [/INST] If they can’t find u shares, how r they charging u for borrowing costs?
[INST] Enough to buy 1 AMD share this month, 2 or 3 AMD shares next month, and a few thousand AMD shares by the end of the end. [/INST] pls no
[INST] I'm a bit worried about what a desperate and manic Trump would do if an impeachment hearing does get started. [/INST] What’s he gonna do ... start a trade war with China?
[INST] Looks like they will be worthless . [/INST] Nah, 4/20 expiry. Let em ride.
[INST] You are right there is a ton of poor people but they are not poor because others are rich so the problem is not inequality it's something else. [/INST] Uhm, they literally are? They are poor because they own a low share of the total resources. If others who own a giant share would own less, there would be left more for the rest.
[INST] Maybe OP looks like a poor slob so they'd rather pay 2-3% than have his check bounce or have to deal with late rent [/INST] Maybe OP is paying their mortgage plus 20%, so they just don't give a fuck as long as he pays and leaves the place untrashed
[INST] I hate to break it to you, but that's a 3x leverage ETF not the SPX index. [/INST] Even better
[INST] You should look again [/INST] Still wrong
[INST] Inb4 OP is broke at the open tomorrow [/INST] Op is gonna get rekt Edit: apparently op sold his position yesterday, lucky bastard
[INST] That’s pretty awesome man, congrats and hopefully the next 20K won’t cost so much to learn from [/INST] Tbh this is my yolo account. The 20k came from yoloing from 5k anyways. I’m not too but hurt anyways.
[INST] congrats u were rewarded for your caution ;))) [/INST] Thanks for making me feel better <3
[INST] Holy shit dude I’ve never seen anything like this [/INST] If you look through every comment here like I have, a few people have blown up their accounts just like this before lmao.
[INST] It almost matches the amount of points this post got [/INST] I’m so glad someone saw that! By the end of the day yesterday before bed my account and post matched exactly!
[INST] How do you sell what you never had?? [/INST] Salt the wound boy That’s rude
[INST] What are your next steps my brother? [/INST] I made 70% on my spy puts yesterday woo
[INST] beautiful combination 10/10 execution [/INST] Yeah it's a repost, you think this wsb guy made that?!
[INST] You say, 'fine'; I say 'opportunity costs'. But, I exaggerate. Ytd, F is flat. They're down ~12.5% in 5 years. So, they really aren't a bad investment -- unless you consider that FB is up 500% in 5 years; AMZN is up 53,538%, and TQQQ is up a few quazillioteen, etc... [/INST] Quazillioteen, tho
[INST] Schwab makes you print out the papers and sign them and scan them back to enable options on your IRA. I never got around to it and now I have a full account of money. [/INST] Tastyworks will give you options and futures in a few clicks.
[INST] nice. I'm on Thursday FDs [/INST] godspeed. shit's up $3.24 pre-market fucking PDT rules, wish I could have sold yesterday
[INST] Do you restrict trading to any time of day, week, month? [/INST] Typically will trade in the first hour or two, but not right at the open especially now in choppy markets. One or two trades a day usually ending flat. In lower vol markets can extend holding period and trade earlier at the open or even pre market as whipsaw risk is less. No days/time of month off limit though
[INST] [my past month. Woooo](https://i.imgur.com/XwzggSo.jpg) [/INST] I remember laughing at you yesterday. Thanks for the morning pickup my man.
[INST] feels bad [/INST] When you're caught in the middle and none of your contracts are profitable. The worst! LOL.
[INST] Exactly, and with China having said this for years now, it's just a game for Xi. He knows that he has little to lose. [/INST] Cheap, cheap words.
[INST] Haha I’m bullish the bear refers to me being built like a bear. [/INST] Big and hairy? Or like a character from Richard Scarry?
[INST] [The FT doesn’t see this as a de-escalation at all.](https://outline.com/fJE2gu) Just a reiteration of existing plans at an annual event where Xi was meant to say vaguely pro-open market things. I don’t think these comments even made the WSJ’s front page. We’re not out of the woods yet. [/INST] > Just a reiteration of existing plans The fact that he's reiterating these plans instead of going the other direction is de-escalation. Trump came out swinging, China swung back, Trump upped the ante, then China... goes back to talking about opening up their markets, lowering car tariffs and protecting IP.
[INST] I made 70% on my spy puts yesterday woo [/INST] Madman haha. I'm holding AMD and MSFT calls.
[INST] Why not both [/INST] *fiesta music
[INST] AMD holder here, I’m ready for my tendies from this fucking joke of an option. This. Bag. Is. Fucking. Heaaaaaavvvvvy. [/INST] Thanks for buying my calls
[INST] OMG How do I stop!?! Up 637.50. I'm done. Goodnight. [/INST] I should have gone to bed. I ended the night down over 600. Just made up for it today. Up 762.50.
[INST] Where's Papa Ma at? [/INST] Directing
[INST] Correct me if I’m wrong. I just looked on their website. It’s 1.55% for CIT and they require a $100 min deposit. To make sure we’re in the right sub, ppl can start dropping their pennies into GS. [/INST] Yes you're right. I'm the autist. I'm thinking of vanguard's money market which you need a minimum of $3K to start. Edit: wait I am right.
[INST] Ahhh I remember the days when losing $1000 used to phase me... [/INST] Yup! When I first started trading I used to freak out during the days I lose $1000 and cash out the gains when I made $500. Lol! Now I lose $3k in a day and it doesn't even phase me. But the money I am playing with now is a lot bigger though.
[INST] The Chinese LOVE Western stuff, it's a sign of status. Now it'll be more affordable. Besides Chinese cars are crap. [/INST] Chinese cars have been known to spontaneously burst into flames after a fender Bender. It's like a country full of Ford Pintos.
[INST] It’s Trump creating drama only he can “solve” (by shutting the fuck up) at which point saner heads prevail. Donnie declares victory and you get posts like this. Wake me up when China actually follows through. [/INST] Of course they will, they've got a $180,000,000,000 gun to their head which will get even bigger if they don't follow through.
[INST] For contrast, there's a Chinese food place near me that always has a massive line around dinner time practically going out the building. Cash only. The food is good, hot/fresh (necessarily I suppose), large portions, and cheap. There are a few other ethnic food places in my city just like it. Only a few people have ever complained about it but they still drive 45 minutes through traffic and hit the ATM to eat here. [/INST] So did this place lose customers after they started accepting credit cards or are they still cash only? If they are still cash only that doesn't really make this a contrast. My guess is a place that is good enough to drive 45 minutes to get to would be fine even if they bumped up prices to accept credit cards. As long as their quality remained the same.
[INST] Read my other comment, he's 'made' these concession before, in that he has said those words, and then done absolutely nothing. [/INST] He ain't dealing with no Obama bitch this time tho
[INST] I'm going to be popping champagne the day bitcoin just deletes itself and takes all these autistic children's money with it [/INST] Yea because people are still playing modern warfare 2 on xxbox 360
[INST] funny thing in wsb market, red actually means price is up and green means down. Follow the locals, young man. [/INST] Don’t underestimate our ability to lose money either way
[INST] The dude is full on creepy and sucks at speaking. It doesn't matter though. People see an autistic child and give him the benefit of the doubt. [/INST] He's no Obama, but his words are so carefully chosen you'd think they were part of the Bible. Zuck will crush it
[INST] $AMD [/INST] Old meme ...NEXT
[INST] Fucking hell, Trump won the trade war...... I have to say, I'm not usually a fan of Trump but I'm impressed. [/INST] told you. I didn't know anything about winning the Trade War, but I did know it can't keep going down with 5 billion Puts everybody has as well as Earnings is end of this month and all! So I'm holding all the way through. Here comes $5000-$10,000 from 1 single future!
[INST] Thanks. How many contracts if you dont mind? [/INST] Only 10. Small play. Currently down a little. Hoping for good guidance during the earnings call next Friday.
[INST] Replaced? The_donald continues to spew retardation. More at 8. [/INST] I was finally banned today. Well it was my first comment ever in the sub, called /r/hottiesfortrump shitty photoshop. Immediate ban What a sensitive bunch of cucks
[INST] Funny stuff, but by my question I was asking for results, not methods. [/INST] Doing nothing is a result. I mean I guess after 4 years he can take credit for the sun rising 1459 times. Some would say that's silly, but political supporters like ... well, you ... have a way of eating that up. If, 6 months from now, international trade is on the whole less restricted than it was before he took office, I'll admit he did a good thing. Right now we're on the wrong side of that.
[INST] Really just because it's been sitting in a safety deposit box for a few years not collecting interest. I suppose I could pay cash and just let my paychecks build in the bank for a few months. [/INST] that's what I would do
[INST] I just checked my Spotify account, its not an option at least for me [/INST] For students. $5/mo.
[INST] Wheymen. [/INST] Whammen.
[INST] We are hailing to a dictator now? This sub has really gone down hill [/INST] Down hill from what?
[INST] If this is the new direction it's a win-win-win for the world [/INST] A loss for China's IP thieves.
[INST] [it was Boxxy](https://twitter.com/off_by_1_error/status/977937321889853446) [/INST] [@off_by_1_error's latest tweet](https://i.imgur.com/xxZR4n4.jpg) [@off_by_1_error on Twitter](https://twitter.com/off_by_1_error) - ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^| ^[feedback](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=twinkiac)
[INST] Stfu and enjoy the gif faggot [/INST] I already enjoyed it the other day
[INST] I can't find anything. Sold off crazy fast though. [/INST] where are you getting volume numbers?
[INST] No you faggot [/INST] Well it’s constantly fucking me so I get confused sometimes.
[INST] New number who dis? [/INST] Send nudes
[INST] It’s a meme around here because all of the people in /r/personalfinance circlejerk about how great the 1.4% savings account is, ignoring any sort of investments. I haven’t used the brokerage at all, but they’re a great bank in my experience. [/INST] Ah. Yes. Can't blame them. Most people think savings account is the way to go, the end all. Savings is a good step to having fluid assets but putting away money in investments is the best way to secure a nice financial future.
[INST] Bold strategy [/INST] not really, for a rally, this volume is butts
[INST] Don’t start sucking his dick until we see actual results. [/INST] There is middle ground between 'Trump is a blithering idiot and I could totally do better' and 'sucking his dick'. This is actual results, just not the final results.
[INST] >Get that shit at your peak, 20s, 30s, 40s. So how do we do that fuck-ass [/INST] BUY. THE. DIP. SELL. THE. DIP.
[INST] Feeling a lot less stupid about my 5/18 275s after reading that. [/INST] Sorry but those are still stupid lol
[INST] Are there any big differences between red pill and MGTOW? [/INST] Good question, I have no idea. I didn’t venture that far.
[INST] Wtf why don't I have this card [/INST] It's a legit card. No annual fee, no foreign transaction fee. 2% on gas, restaurants, drug stores. 3% on Amazon without prime, 5% with prime.
[INST] The DOW more than doubled while Obama was in office. [/INST] Going from 14k to 7k and then back to 14k would not be considered 'double' by any person with half a brain.
[INST] Go to Panda Express and ask for the triple leveraged “three entree plate”. Then leave it on the roof of your car as you drive away because you can’t do anything right. [/INST] Bahaahaha, this failed shitpost is worth that comment
[INST] About that... [/INST] I'm skeptical as fuck tbh, but no trade war is good for me
[INST] Yeah basically what they have done here either cut out trump well and stick him over the rabbit or what would have been easier to do is get a video of trump already in a classroom and then cut in the “blur” of the camera movement to make it look like it’s the same place. [/INST] The correct term would be 'edit'. You technically can use photoshop for editing video frame by frame, but Photoshop is primarily used for still images (hence the name PHOTOshop). This is why people use the term 'Photoshop' in regards to a photo, not video. When you're working with video you edit it using something like After Effects. TLDR: Long ADBE
[INST] He already drilled her butt hole hard, how to get more winning than that? [/INST] A2M?
[INST] I already try to help at my community level. The problem is that I have limited resources available. Some people have far more resources, so they should help far more than me. [/INST] Yeah but they don't want to. Pretend they don't exist. They don't need a social safety net.
[INST] You have to understand... [/INST] No, YOU have to understand...
[INST] And they’ll be the 1st to be replaced by robots and 3D printing. [/INST] Idk about replaced outright but global supremacy ain’t around the corner for them lol
[INST] Y [/INST] B
[INST] Some smart guy will come in a do it... right? [/INST] Hopefully
[INST] If by “anytime” you mean once your cash back is above $25 then yea you can cash out anytime. [/INST] Well, true, but it's pretty easy to rack up 25. I meant anytime in relation to some cards that send you a check once a year for your rebate which is pretty lame.
[INST] How do I short this guys liver? [/INST] Fuck what the fuck is going on. Its like I'm watching The Big Short. I don't understand shit
[INST] wHaTs A cOmPuTeR? [/INST] nEvEr hEaRd oF gOoGlE i jUsT uSe sIrI
[INST] Thanks for making me feel better <3 [/INST] FuzzyCouchPotato ugh i remember you youre the positive one stop being cheerful youre dragging down my hate boner
[INST] MSFT and AAPL. Got like 13k on MSFT calls and like 5k on AAPL. Last time they dipped I bought ITM for May 18. Wish I doubled down on Friday when everything was like 3% cheaper but fuck it. [/INST] MSFT I can get with, but AAPL fucked me hard the last time I played its earnings, so, that one's a no go from me (also, the company, at least publicly, is effectively doing nothing right now).
[INST] We shall see. I think we will be fine through EOD, and maybe even through end of week. [/INST] We shall see haha. I held my fb call even though it was up 33%
[INST] Good thing I'm not in this to make money. [/INST] Yeah I have a 'fun' account only for swing trading.
[INST] wat [/INST] GET YOUR FINGER ON THE TRIGGER DIPSHIT
[INST] The only thing that's over are your puts [/INST] I certainly hope so.
[INST] To be fair this guys Mom has been sucking every guys dick for a long time now. [/INST] thot been suckin so much dick im still a virgin lmao wait
[INST] It's a Stormy next few weeks [/INST] Remind me again why anyone cares that a billionaire fucked a porn star over a decade ago.
[INST] Could be Chile [/INST] For some reason I highly doubt it
[INST] BofAML, who issued this earnings preview, has them at an $18 PT, CFRA has a $16, Credit Suisse $13.50. It might not be hit $18, but it's surely going to move above the $9.90 it's at now. [/INST] there's plenty of companies that aren't a clusterfuck like AMD, half this sub is betting on them to go up which reinforces the idea that it's a bad play good luck, i'm just saying it's not great advice to tell someone to get involved with it early in their options trading experience
[INST] just loaded up the FD calls [/INST] Moon inbound 🚀
[INST] FuzzyCouchPotato ugh i remember you youre the positive one stop being cheerful youre dragging down my hate boner [/INST] I can drag my dick across your face if you’d prefer <3
[INST] Lol good luck with that. [/INST] yeah i’m definitely silly for thinking he would ever crack under pressure interesting that FB is creeping higher though, up ~1.5% since my post
[INST] After the fees, licensure requirements, quarterly reporting, all the shit the SEC makes you do, and the invested time I think it comes out to be pretty even. Plus I'm sure there's a law that stops something like this from happening. [/INST] It's 100% illegal. But between you and me, I know people who do this and pay virtually no taxes even though they make over 250k/year. Idk how they get away with it.
[INST] Kinda ironic coming from someone from T_D lol [/INST] >Deflect and project! A true Trumpette 🎺 kinda ironic coming from a cuck
[INST] Just sold my Sinclair puts because fucking sideways [/INST] if it's going sideways sell calls
[INST] And a home [/INST] And $3,000
[INST] I dunno, I guess I'm kinda conservative and that's the advice I got [/INST] No problem there's nothing wrong with that! I just find a lot of times people have cash saved up or are shooting for a particular goal but aren't really sure why. So if you figure out the why, then you could figure out the best options on how. Usually people have 3-6 months expenses saved in cash for emergencies. Anything outside emergencies/immediate opportunities should be invested. Would you say that's the purpose?
[INST] Just missing the lighting bolt in the next frame [/INST] That flag mounted to his porch didn't look like it missed that lightning bolt.
[INST] Hey any chance you can separate your stocks in a single account into different areas/tabs/folders... like longs/days/swings? [/INST] No. The website is pretty garbage and that's a widely known fact. It has a penchant to crash
[INST] Cuz they manufacture cards. [/INST] Checkmate autists
[INST] Almost any site has volume numbers. Look at yahoo finance [/INST] i was hoping for comparisons (% avg volume by time of day or something similar)
[INST] There's a difference between 'Murica, the South, and the Appalachians. [/INST] Dont forget pineys in Jersey. Odd bunch of people.
[INST] waiting for my RTN calls to rocket [/INST] Waiting on my dfen calls. But I think I'm fucked. 55 and 60 c 4/20 There's absolutely no fucking volume