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SUBREDDIT: r/Cooking
TITLE: What to do with some chicken thighs
POST: So, since I went to college I started cooking a bit, I enjoy doing it and I love the different tastes that I can make. Because of this, my mom has asked me to do the cooking for dinner this summer. Tomorrow night is my first night really home, and she has some chicken thighs she wants me to use, but I have never worked with any chicken with a bone yet. I have made chicken cutlets countless numbers of times, but those were usually chicken parm or just as a quick meal... I need some good suggestions on what to do with these. Thanks in advance.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [23m] was cheated on by my wife [21f] and she is convincing it that it's my fault. Help.
POST: My wife cheated on me. Flat out. 2 Fridays ago, she didn't come home after work . The next morning I was scared and looking all over her (imagining the worst) and ended up tracking her cell to a hotel. Where she was with someone else. I waited in the lobby for 3 hours until she came out. Once confronted she did the casual "this is your fault, you forced me to do this" routine. I believed it. Apologized. And it wasn't until I was halfway home I realized, wait what? But yeah. Fast forward 2 weeks she's still texting the person she cheated on me with. Snapchatting, pics, who knows. I can't be sure what they're saying. But everything is all my fault. How did "I let our relationship come to this" or how I "never treated her right the past month" etc etc. Usual things Cheater's say, although I do give it some merit. Maybe I wasn't the best. But I would never step out of the marriage. So we're making it work. She says she has a lot of "thinking to do". All while she continues to message this other person. My question is, is the messaging between them still cheating? Do I have a right to be angry that she continues a relationship behind my back with the VERY SAME person she cheated on me with? I feel like it's and obvious answer, but when confronted she has a way with words to make me feel like the she's the victim. Please help Reddit.
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SUBREDDIT: r/dogs
TITLE: At what point is it considered abandonment when your ex leaves you with the dog?
POST: My ex worked at a veterinarian clinic, they received a dog that the owner didn't want. I was given the dog because my dog had recently past and I was looking for a new one.
All the vet bills are in my ex's name since she got discounts on the bills.
she moved out 8 months ago, took her two dogs with her and left my three, one of which is the dog in question. I was just taken to court and told that i am being sued and she is claiming the dog is hers.
she has made no contact with me or the police about the dog in the last 8 months and now i am worried that a dog given to me is going to be taken away just because the bills are in her name.
I'm hoping to go the route of abandonment since i don't have much to prove that it is mine.
I live in NY, where im sure the laws are different from other places
this just happened tonight so i have not yet contacted a lawyer. just trying to search things on my own until i do
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [19/m] Need help dealing with feelings for an 18/f.
POST: So, here's the deal. I really am attracted to this girl who goes to college with me. She said in passing conversation as friends that she could see us getting married someday (we're married on Facebook, inside joke). I told her one day that I like her as more than a friend, and she said that I'm not in her friend zone but above it. She also said she's not yet ready for a relationship, to which I said that was okay and that I'd always have feelings for her when she's ready. We're still good friends. However, since break started, she hasn't even taken the time to text me or Skype me or anything unless I do it first. Her twin hasn't either, so I'm sure it isn't just her. However, I don't really know how to approach this whole situation. I'd really like to start a relationship with her starting this semester when we go back, because our time at college is obviously limited. Any ideas that wouldn't totally freak her out and kill our friendship? Or any ways that I can truly judge if she's interested in me? I'm fairly certain she is, but I want to know for sure so I'm not wasting all my time.
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SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: Caught my 13yo sister "playing" with her boyfriend. What do I do about this?
POST: [I have custody of all 3.]
I can't believe I'm asking this. I need your wisdom again, /r/parenting. This time, it's regarding Amber.
A couple hours ago, I got home from work a little late. Before, I trusted Amber wholeheartedly not to do anything stupid while I was away. She's proven herself to be very mature for her age. Now, I think she's being a little *too* mature.
I heard moaning and thumping coming from her room and instantly knew what was happening. Basically, I ran in and saw her and her boyfriend fucking in her bed.
Naturally, I flipped out. I threw his clothes at him and told him to get out of my apartment. When he left, I started to scold her, but she started screaming at me about how I never let her do anything. She said that she was tired of working so much just because she's the older sister. She called me every name under the sun and more while doing this.
Then she made me get out of her room. I've tried to get her to come out, even picked the lock to the door out of frustration, but she's barricaded it or something.
Am I being a shitty brother? I don't like making her do all this stuff, but I can't do it all myself either. And my older friend that I mentioned in a previous post is sick in the hospital, so he can't help.
I fucking hate my dad. This is all his fucking fault. If he wasn't such a worthless piece of shit, everything would be fine.
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SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: How does someone in my situation find a girl to date? Male/24yrs old/Cystic Fibrosis(details inside of course)
POST: I'm a 24 yr old male 5'8'' 143lbs. I have cystic fibrosis and I am being treated for a serious bacterial infection requiring 9-18 months of heavy antibiotics. Even if this treatment works, the doctors can't reliably tell me how much time I have left; however they are hopeful and optimistic that they can buy me "years and years and years."
I am as athletic as I can be all things considered. I ran a half-marathon last year and plan on training for another though I can barely finish 2 miles at the moment.
I am unable to go back to school during this ordeal and may have to quit my job as well.
I have only recently hit my stride in talking to women but this infection is a terrible set back in every way I can imagine.
I do my best to not feel hopeless in spite of everything I am up against but when it comes to finding a girl that I could date, not to mention actually have a relationship with...hopeless certainly fits the description of how I feel.
I've been in one serious relationship and one short-lived friends with benefits experience.
So my initial questions are...
How can I even begin to meet girls? Considering I can't be around smoke so no bars and I'm so worn out from the antibiotics and constant medical appointments that I have very little energy left over. (no luck so far on dating sites)
If I did meet a worthwhile girl how am I supposed to explain my situation without scaring her off?
Any advice would be greatly appreciate and I'll happily answer any questions that anyone may have.(or expand on anything that I've said so far )
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I[24M] would totally get back together with my[22F] exGF, except she's gotten chubby. How can I get the message to her?
POST: We've ben broken up for over a year now, and have hung out a few times more recently. We've had a lot of fun, and we really only broke up because college was ending. Now, she's moved out to my city and we been seeing each other every once and a while. If anything I'm more excited about her now than I was when we were dating.
Unfortunately however, she's gained a good deal of weight. It's been a long slide since before we even broke up, but last time we got naked I couldn't help but be a bit turned off.
What's really unfortunate is that I know she very much wants to get back together as well, and I think that if she somehow got the message about weight she would jump right on it. As it is, I've been totally dodging the issue, since she still hasn't forgiven me for the time I brought it up a couple years ago.
I'm talking about 20-30lbs probably - then she'd be smoking hot! Such a shame since everything else is great! How can I get this message to her!?
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SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: Need an outsider's opinion.
POST: Hi guys, hope you're having a great morning. Thanks for reading this. I've got an issue that I need your opinion on because I feel as though I'm to close to my problems I can't get my mind wrapped around then. I'm a full time employed 21 year old ( not in school, but soon to be). I live at home, with my parents. So to get to it my parents are sinking financially. Most of which being my dad trying to play catch up because of his poor choices. He's been laid off from multiple well paying jobs because he had an alcohol problem. He's now completely sober but working as an insurance agent so all of his income depends upon the hard work that goes into his buisness. My car was purchased by my father and also pays for the rest of my bills excluding phone bills gas and such. My problem is my family is extremely toxic. They're emotionally abusive almost everyday. I feel almost trapped in my situation. In efforts to leave I've been paying my father 500$ every month for the past 6 months because my plan was to move out in roughly a year where my girlfriend ( soon to be fiance) lives. My family is very emotionally abusive. I get anxiety when I even think about going home. Everyday I get home from work I'm either helping clean their house walk their dogs or helping out with other small things no questions asked. I also have intentions to keeping sending them then money if and when I do move away.. Am I wrong for wanting to get away and have a normal life? I'm not sure if I'm actually being selfish or if they've just been telling me that so long I'm beginning to believe it..
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: help. 31 y/o woman. i'm not in love with my husband of one year. he's the best person I've ever met, although he has severe anger problems.
POST: i want out but don't know how to leave. he lived as a gay man from 18 to 32. then he married, then divorced, and we've been together for 4 years, married for 1. i was against the marriage and realize it was a mistake. he's very wonderful but has so much built up anger. he's cross unless he's high (pot). i don't know how i can leave him, as he is my very best friend... he refuses to go to therapy, individual or couple. I see a therapist. i know he doesn't see it this way, but we are both extremely unhappy the way things are. i know we'll spend the rest of our lives this way unless i choose to change things. it makes me want to cheat on him, but i don't think i could live with myself.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [20M] met a girl [22F] who is super into the "nerdy" type of guys but we have no common interests and would probably be bad together. How can I let her know I'm not interested in a relationship?
POST: Well we have 2 classes together and I'm really not good with women but she started talking to me a little bit during class and saw my "nerdy" and "geeky" laptop. Lets me know she's into the nerdy type of guys. Ill admit I am a big nerd when it comes to certain stuff but I'm afraid she's become a little too obsessed with me in the short time that we have talked. But she's one of the prettiest girls on campus, solid 10. which kinda got me pretty nervous even looking in her direction, I'm surprised I made it without fainting. But we share no coming interests. She asked me what are all those colorful letters on my laptop was. I was writing a program in python. Lol. But I would like to let her know I'm not interested in a relationship right now but what would be a good way to let her down easily?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Developing a little crush but I'm taken.. Is this normal?
POST: Hi everyone.
I'm (F24) just a little worried right now. I just started a new job and it's been great. My coworkers and I get along well and it's been really fun. There's this one guy there and we talk often. Let's call him Jake (M24). At first I really wanted him to be a close friend of mine at work! But I feel like I've started to get excited to go to work.. And I think I've developed a small crush on him.
I've been with my boyfriend (M24) for a year now and I would never do anything to hurt him.
I've been cheated on and I would never do the same thing to anyone. Although if he knew this, he would be hurt...
I'm just worried because I've been getting excited to dress up for work and realize it's because of Jake..? Am I overthinking this? Is this normal? Please help because I'm feeling really shitty... :(
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: GFs comments making me depressed
POST: 19M 19F Dating 2.5 years Hey /r/relationships, my gf says weird things about other guys out of nowhere that make me feel bad about myself. Its always about their height/strength and once when we were watching Jackass 3 she even said, "That guy had a bigger package than you", talking about Chris Pontiac (Im pretty well endowed, almost 8", so I don't really know what to think about that one). She always says it in a blunt casual manner such as, "That guy is taller/stronger than you". I don't want to sound conceited but Im not even small either, in 5'10 weigh 190 (not fat) and played Flanker for my high school rugby team. Today at the gym she said "That guy could take you in a fight", and and pointed to a guy from my rugby team (she didn't know), who I had done drills against, and he wasn't very strong/good. I, being fed up with this emasculating billshit said matter of factly "No he can't." She then called me insecure and that she's only telling the truth and now its really awkward between us. She really sweet otherwise and is is a very generous person, and I can't figure out why she does this stuff. She acts like there is nothing wrong with saying this stuff and that im just too insecure/defensive. I want to stay with her and every time she makes these comments it bugs me to no end.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [28 M] How do I tell interest after first date?
POST: I've been going out on a few first dates recently and as far as I can tell things have gone reasonably well. We had good friendly joking conversation over drinks, spent several hours together in good ambiance, had a lot of good stuff to talk about, nothing creepy happened on either side, etc.
I generally go into dates not expecting anything, I'm ok with being friends with these women if it turns out there's not much chemistry but we get along great anyway. However, I'd still like to at least find out what our position is after that first date. Is there interest in taking this further? Was this a no? Were both parties not really sure and should we try again?
Of course if my date said something like "Oh my gosh, we have to do this again soon!" that's a resounding yes to me, but none of that really seems to happen. I'm not sure if I should interpret that as a polite rejection or ambiguity or something else altogether.
What's a good way of figuring this out? I'd love to just ask this question in such a way that doesn't preclude potential future friendship, if it turns out there's no romantic interest there. Wouldn't want to make things too awkward, but also would love to get some clarity.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27 M] with my wife [26 F] 4 years, I think I'm having an emotional affair.
POST: I need some input on this situation.
My wife is a doctor and makes a little more than me I'm an artist. I feel sometimes like my wife is better than me and gets more recognition. Whenever we go to my parents all the focus is usually on her and her job.
Nobody really cares about what I do just what my wife does and I felt.... useless. For a little while I just rolled with it because if I said anything not much could be done anyway.
This woman [Nora] started talking to me apparently she sits across from me at this restaurant I go to. We started talking and got to know each other a little more and she's an interesting person.
We share the same interests and it really is bizarre how much we have in common. I told her I'm an artist and she thought that was awesome and wanted to know more.
A little while back I showed her what I was working on and she was stunned that I painted that. She wanted to see more so now whenever I'm finished with something i show it to her.
The look on her face is priceless sometimes, it feels nice that someone is interested in my work. She's started bringing me and her lunch so sometimes we eat together and talk.
She knows I'm married and I've told her my problems and she was very sympathetic. She said maybe if I had the time I could teach her a little bit and I said maybe.
I've thought about it and I can't shake the feeling that I'm doing something wrong. Is this cheating?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [29M] with my ex [24F] dated for 2 years, I'm miserable now that we're broken up.
POST: I don't even know where to begin but im writing this post in the hopes that I can get some clarity of mind, or just to vent in general. I can't stop thinking about what has transpired between us.
We dated for two years. She was amazing, is amazing. For two years we dated and never once did we argue or have any serious drama between us. Shes my best friend, i spend all of my time with her. I'm a pretty independent guy, but I think its fair to say that she was the focus of my life.
Emotions were always tough with her. I drunkenly blurted out "I love you" on month 3 of our relationship, she never said it back. We basically broke up because she doesn't love me and doesn't think she ever can love me.
Life sucks, its hard, get over it, yes.. I understand all of these things, but I dont feel like what is happening with us is right. Ive searched for a girl like her my entire life and I do not want to lose her.
She has always had a hard time with emotions. I think she never loved me because she wouldnt allow herself to. Shes so closed off and compartmentalized getting any real emotion out of her was just not doable.
We're broken up and she is taking time to figure things out. I want to, have to, give her her space but its very hard. My only hope is that this will give her some perspective and she will see what shes losing, but its taking every bit of me to get through this. I love this girl more than anything else in the world, I will always love her, but I feel absolutely awful right now. Im terrified that Im going to force myself to get over her, and if she ever gets her shit together and realizes what shes losing in us, I may not feel the same way anymore.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M/F] and my crush [18/F] messed up a great friendship, want to fix it
POST: Hey guys, recently, my friend (17F) and I ran into an issue in our relationship. We are really close friends, but I started to like her. I have known her for 2 years now.
The interesting thing is even though we are close friends, we barely actually talk at school (we are high schoolers). We only talk outside of school or online and I'm not the only one who starts the conversations. One day I asked her online why we don't talk at school and things got awkward fast. She replied idk and I didn't know what to say either. It's been a few days since then. We haven't talked at all since then, just awkwardly ignoring each other at school. I'm just looking for advice on what to do because I really like her and I don't want to lose her friendship.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [53M] Biological father recently entered my life after 21 years, and I just found out he has cancer. [21F]
POST: Basically, the title sums it up in a simple manner.
I never knew my biological father, and lived a normal childhood with my mother and step father. Up until a few months ago I really didn't know anything about him. Since then, we've only contacted through messages, and we're now facebook friends so I can see his pictures, and some personal info. He's struggled with addiction, and is now undergoing chemo for cancer.
I really don't know how to take this.. or how it affects me. None of my friends have ever gone through anything similar so they can't relate. I really could use some guidance.
Thanks Reddit!
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Current employer gives counter offer, lets me choose my price. What do I do? (IT Professional)
POST: Long time reader; first time poster.
I've recently put in my resignation notice at my current employer, who earlier this year gave me a 10% raise for doing exceptional work. Before this happened, I secured another position at another company contingent on finishing my degree. When I accepted the position, it was a bit more than I'm making, but now the new position is less. The new company won't counter offer (big company, totally understand), but the one I'm working for now has basically said "name your price" to keep me.
There are pros and cons to each? What would you do?
Old job:
* Get to play with a lot of cool technology and get my hands and feet wet in many, many areas
* On call 24/7/365. Usually no more than 3-5 off hours calls a week.
* High stress.
* Promises of things getting better, as the company has just been purchased. The new owner seems very interested in fixing the problems that exist.
* Small team responsible for many things.
* In a senior technical position.
* No room to 'move up' in the company as my superiors are likely 'lifers'.
* No shift premium for working off hours
* Lots of bureaucratic crap.
* Letting me pick my counter offer.
* Crappy drive to work.
New job:
* Slightly less pay to start, although raises every 6 months for 3 years for good performance.
* On call shifts and schedules.
* (Hopefully) less stress.
* The company has been around for a long time, but the IT organization is new. Lots of changes to come.
* Get to work on what I want.
* Far more vacation time.
* Better 401k opportunities.
* Ability to 'move up'
* Better tuition assistance.
* 3 miles from home.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17 M] with my 5 month relationship with gf [18 F]
POST: So I know that I may be a teenager, but I really need relationship advice with my girlfriend. She's amazing and for the first 4 months, I legitimately thought she was the greatest girlfriend I ever had. Yet there's been some things that really bother me. Like for example when she happens to pass by me at school, sometimes she won't even say hi to me. When we hang out with mutual friends, she completely ignores me and her excuse is that she just doesn't know who to talk to when we're hanging out (me or her friends). Around Christmas time I brought this up and how it's hurt me and suggested taking a break. After about a weeklong break, she decided to break up with me and it hurt me a lot. However after about 4 days I had a heart to heart talk with her and we got back together. However recently she hasn't really been talking to me as much, and seems to always choose her friends over me. In the last couple of weeks, my parents have had issues and so I somewhat drifted apart from my gf. Even though I'm crazy about her, she asked me if I still had feelings for her and I said of course I do. When I asked her the same question, she replied "Yes, but a little less since you've been acting distant with me recently." Also during our break, her friend told me that she was pretty much over me and was going to go on a date with another guy she thinks is cute. I don't know what to do now and just need advice. I'm still crazy about her, but it seems like she just doesn't feel the same way about me and I just don't want to let go of her.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How is it going through a breakup? I (20F) have never been through one and might be soon.
POST: I'm a 20 year old woman and I've been with my SO (25M) for 5 years, and yes, he's been the only parter I've been with. I feel like I'm a different person now, like I'm growing older and have different interests now. I'm in college and having a great time, a great job and I just think we don't fit anymore. He became my whole world and I don't even know who I am without him.
The problem is he's told me he wants to marry me, he wants to have a family, and at first I wanted that too, but now I'm not so sure. I don't want to break his heart nor disappoint him; I don't want to make him feel like he has been wasting his time with me. It's like crushing his ideal of future right in front of his face.
I also wouldn't know what to do with all of our memories. I admit we're co-dependant and that's wrong, but we've built too much in 5 years, too many memories and feelings and I think I'd miss him way too much if I just left.
I'm young and confused and I'm sorry I just need advice.
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SUBREDDIT: r/cats
TITLE: I found a kitten this morning (not asking for help, just a sweet story)
POST: This morning I heard a pitiful mewing coming from our garage. Our three adult cats were at attention, staring curiously at the door that leads to the garage. I opened the door and there was a tiny kitten with grey stripes and a pretty white belly. She was so scared that her little tail looked like a bottle brush! She walked right up to me and I picked her up and she immediately relaxed in my hands- this kitty obviously belonged to someone.
My immediate question was "how did she get in here?!" The garage door had been shut all night. Apparently she had come yesterday afternoon while I'd gone bike riding and just slept quietly in our garage all night. I had my husband hold her while I put on my shoes and she began to purr and rub all over his hands.
After checking with our immediate neighbors I went to a house two doors down and was immediately greeted by an ecstatic lady who turned out to be the kitten's owner. She was so excited and said their entire family had been out until 2am looking for this little kitty. Apparently their four-year-old has a bad habit of opening doors when they aren't looking, and the kitten just escaped. It was such a nice feeling to find a kitten and immediately have it returned to its owner! :)
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SUBREDDIT: r/cats
TITLE: Need advice about finding a friend for a lonely older cat
POST: Hi r/cats!
I am coming to you today on behalf of my mother; one of her cats passed two weeks ago at the age of 11 and her other cat - a 12-year-old boy who has never been an only child - is incredibly lonely. He cries at night and wanders the house looking for his sister, and when my mom goes to work every day she feels terrible leaving him alone without a snuggle buddy.
She wants to get him a companion but isn't sure if she should be looking into a kitten or an adolescent or a grown-up cat or what. I figured I would pose the question to the experts and see what you come up with.
Thanks!
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by performing a flawless yoga trouser trumpet
POST: So tonight I tried yoga for the first time with my girlfriend. It was a lovely old building, an old Methodist church with high arched ceilings and an old wooden floor.
The first half of the session was about focusing on relaxing, deep breathing "inhale and exhale" and stretching.
At this point the evening took a turn while I was sitting on the mat with my knees out to the side, when suddenly without warning I released a pristine fart. No misconception possible; no way that this could be misconstrued as a cough, squeaky floorboard or sneeze. It's worth reminding you that this was in a church and this sound reverberated around the room, hopefully enough so that the noise couldn't be echolocated.
Then comes half an hour of pure torture trying not to make eye contact with my girlfriend while the teacher tells us to still inhale and exhale. Had to even disguise a laugh as a sneeze, pity I couldn't do that earlier!
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Hey Reddit, who else has dealt with an SO that faps to pics of his or her friends? I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about this.
POST: And even saving their pics in individual folders. We fought about deleting the folder that had nudes of one of the friends (and damn, did I feel guilty about asking the SO to do that-- the pics were sent before we started dating), so now I don't bring it up.
And so the fapping to friends continues. Especially with FB. The SO doesn't hide any of these things from me, so I really don't know what to think. Is this madness? I don't have a problem with porn or things like SG or gonewild.. I just don't know what to think when they're our friends!
And please accept that this is one small aspect of an otherwise super fantastic relationship. It just gets to me when I think about. So, maybe I should just stop thinking about it... Bah, here's to getting it off my chest for the new year.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by inviting my friend to a party.
POST: Background: I'm (17M) senior in high school. I've been madly in love with a girl (let's call her "backstabbing Becky") my same age since seventh grade, and nothing has ever worked out so I tend to be sad around her because her presence is a tease. No throwaway because fuck.
So this happened last Saturday. My high school varsity football team was throwing a big party in celebration of our season starting. Keep in mind, me and my best friend both start on the team and are pretty cool guys. (Not to sound cocky sorry) I drive myself, pick up backstabbing Becky, and we head over to the party. Keep in mind, I was planning on going in for the kiss tonight after the party and taking her to a look out at night. So we get to the party and everyone is just throwing back shots like their name is steph curry. Meanwhile, backstabbing Becky is no where to be seen up until I have to take her home. I call her phone multiple times with no answer. So last resort I call my best friend to see if he knows where she is and to tell her to meet me at my car. Standing by my car I can see my best friend (clearly borderline alcohol poisoned) stumble out of the house with no pants on and lo and behold, the girl of my dreams is giving my best friend a walking-in-the-pants hand job as they both approach my car. Worst part is, is that she was sober. I guess my facial expression and lack of talking to her as I sped to drop backstabbing Becky of at her house made her realize what she did. She's been texting me and apologizing for days but I can't respond without getting too mad.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: What happened when you [29/M] were in a long-term relationship/marriage with someone you were absolutely, head-over-heels in love with [29/F] but weren't 100% attracted to?
POST: I don't know what to do. We ([29/M], [29/F]) have been dating for just a hair over a year. I am completely in love with her personality, with her mind, with her smile and her sense of humor. And she's pretty. But she's somewhat overweight and has struggled with her weight her entire life. I love her desperately but I'm afraid that her weight will come to be a problem.
I got her to exercise with me for a while and we are trying to 'eat healthy' -- in both cases because it was something I wanted to do and didn't have much of an effect. I'm worried. If we go all the way, will her weight become more of a problem or less? Obviously, you can't really answer this question for me but I'd love to hear from people in a similar experience.
If it matters, I'm in relatively good shape and have typically dated more objectively attractive women in the past (but this girl is so incredible in so many ways!). And she's probably 30-40 pounds overweight -- nothing that it's impossible to lose but it's probably unreasonable to expect people will get skinnier over time when the opposite is almost always true, especially given that it's a problem she's always struggled to deal with (she had stomach surgery a decade ago). Any advice would be appreciated.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My partner [25,M]has been secretly reading my text messages [23,F]
POST: I have been with my boyfriend for 4 months. I gave him my ipad to use a couple months ago because I never use it.
I realized a few weeks later that my imessages for my phone get sent to my ipad because they have always been linked, and I asked him if he had been getting my conversations. He said no, that it was not synced up, and so I forgot it.
I asked him about it multiple times, because strange things started happening. I had new text messages but I was not getting notified, they were already "Read". I asked him again, if he had been reading my conversations. He denied that the Ipad received any messages.
It all came to a head last night and he finally admitted to me, after lying another 10 times, that he had been reading them.
I have nothing to hide, so I do not care that he has been reading them. I do care that it is an invasion of my privacy, and of my friends' privacy. I do care that he lied. I do also care that he very well was using the contents of my conversation to say things or do things he know would fare well with me, like a cheat book.
I got the iPad back.
I can't decide if this was just harmless curiosity - (wouldn't we all like to know what's being said about us?) Or manipulative that he was using the information to be someone he may not be.
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SUBREDDIT: r/needadvice
TITLE: Is it mentally possible to balance School (night classes), work (full time), and an internship?
POST: I've been working at the same place for about 2 years (which involves vehicle insurance) but I'm beginning to hate it. Not so much what my job entails but more on the amount of work im given each day. Its become very overwhelming this past year and I just don't think its worth the pay anymore. I haven't been in a classroom since I graduated high school and I would really like to just get my ge's out of the way and begin taking classes I would like to take. But there is no way I would survive if I was jobless. So my friend told me about a job stacking chips which shamefully enough, pays more then my job. But it requires me to work from 2am to 10 am.
My family doesnt really want me to throw away all the knowledge that i obtained from my current job over the years, so i wasnthinking of interning at a well known bodyshop a couple of days a week (which could lead to a great carreer as an estimator)
I know that theoretically, its possible. But I don't know if I could take it mentally.
Check out my schedule and let me know if im crazy.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Are stupid friends important?
POST: If junk food is bad for you, are stupid friends too?
I used to have a best friend who was the type to dig himself into holes and blame others. Financially, it would always be the "corporations" or "governments" fault. He also accidentally had a child, and was dumped by his girlfriend because she got fed up with his immaturity (raising one kid would be difficult enough for her). The best way to illustrate this person is simply as a man-child. He's under-prepared for the real world. However, this doesn't make him a terrible person, just a naive one, and his childlike characteristics can be endearing.
Additionally his level of ADHD was infuriating. Seeking intellectual stimuli from him was a fools pursuit. However, when it came to mutual interests that didn't require much thought or disciplined focus, e.g., gaming, and fitness, he was pleasant and amusing company.
A mutual friend of ours finally got fed up with his recurrent Facebook rants against the "corporations" and publically called him out on his skewed world view. I found myself in the middle, when asked "what the hell was the mutual friends problem?" I admitted to being 100% in agreement with what had been said, that marked the end of our friendship.
It's been a year since then, and I've found myself kind of missing his company. It could just be that I haven't really gone out and met enough new people to fill the void, or maybe It's because someone like him actually plays a vital role in balancing ones life, e.g., Joey from Friends, or Barney from HIMYM.
Should I attempt to reconnect?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [20F] new bf [20M] needs frequent reassurances that I'm not sexually/romantically interested in anyone else, how could I make him trust me?
POST: I recently started dating this guy (almost 2 months) and things are going really well, we like each other a lot, we have many things in common and I'm quite happy.
I began to notice, however, that he seems rather insecure and often demanding reassuration that I like him and that I'm not seeing/I'm not interested in someone else (which I'm not). When I go out he askes me if there are male friends, who they are and if I ever liked them and if they ever liked me etc. For now he's half joking, but I'm worried that as we keep on dating things will get unpleasant.
I am -both as a result of my characer and previous experiences- a very faithful person, and I would *not* cheat on anyone I'm going out with. At the same time, in a relationship I value trust above anything else and I gave it inconditionately until I'm proven wrong, so I know that if he keeps on being jealous I'll end up hurt and resentful towards him.
I know that he previously dated a girl that left him for one of her exes and that he didn't go out with anyone for a whole year after that (basically until we met), but I ignore the details.
How could I talk with him about this and convince him that he *can* trust me, without coming off as aggressive and without overreact myself? We don't know each other very well yet and I do not wish to upset him or give him the impression that I'm annoyed/angry, I just want him to relax a bit.
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SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: What does it mean when your girlfriend just stops responding to, or really participating in, your text message conversations? (x-post /r/askwomen)
POST: Well, actually, I already know what this means generally speaking. It means that the end to your relationship is quite close on the horizon. I'm 25 years old, and I've seen this enough to recognize it for the canary in the coal mine that it is. My question more specifically, is why do you usually do it, if you do? What does it mean specifically? What causes it? I am genuinely curious.
**Details**
I'm 25M, she's 22F. We are in a committed relationship, and have been for close to two years now. She has recently started a temporary three month position in a city that is about 6 hours away.
**Summary**
The specific summary is that for close to a week now she hasn't really texted me back. I've attempted to simply start conversation, and these attempts are not reciprocated. I'll pose questions about the day, and what comes back within a 24hr. period is maybe two replies at most, neither of which at all acknowledge the afore mentioned questions that I sent to her.
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SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I [26 M] just broke up with my GF [21] of 7 months, and want to help her come to terms with what she wants
POST: Originally posted in r/relationships, but looking for more answers. Help!
So I had been dating this girl (officially) for 7 months and we just broke up. Reason being, was that a lot of things were going on 2 weeks prior to it. Brace yourselves:
We see each other virtually everyday especially since I am carless for the time being (saw each other a lot before then as well), and relied on her car. I got into a major car accident that left me handicapped (left arm), and out of work. Now, because I am unable to care for myself, she has been helpful in my time of need. After dealing with virtually everything along the way (lawyered up, getting her car towed, renting a car, daily tasks, and going to Hawai'i; which helped a bit), she was unhappy. She knew I would do everything for her (she stated 110%), while she stated she was only giving 80% but wants to reciprocate more. She's torn, and it left me in shambles not knowing where to go from there.
We ended up just breaking up and ended as friends. We both want to be with each other, but the difference between us is that I know what I want in us and see a more prospective future than she does. No matter what I say to validate it, I know it's up to her to figure it out. As much as I want to be with her, I have to let her go, but I also want to help her come to terms with what she wants and ultimately what makes her happy in the long run. I just need suggestions as what I can do or say to help her get there. I want to be selfish in this sense in leading her to be more positive, and in hopes that she will see what I see, and believe in what I believe wholly.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [20 M] 2.5 years, I have trust issues for no reason. How can I fix this?
POST: It's come to my realization that I have trust issues in my relationship. My boyfriend has done nothing to make me feel this way as he is always honest with me and has never cheated on me in the slightest.
Basically, I'm worried constantly if he's going to take advantage of myself once I put my walls down.
I want to trust him, I just don't know how to get over that wall I'm having where it's easier to be cautious (and consequently, annoying to him) than to just be completely vulnarable.
What can I do to get rid of these trust issues? I'm sure this is a loaded question... so I am very sorry but I just don't think it's fair for him to deal with me when he's done nothing wrong.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [18/m] Girl I really like that likes me back has bad history.
POST: She's pretty hot and we've hit it off well.
She just broke up with her boyfriend of 16 months a week ago and after a 3 weeks of knowing me she wants to be in a relationship.
I don't know how to explain to her to wait a couple months without hurting her feelings. I can't tell if this is just a crush for her or she really likes me. I feel like if we were in a relationship she'd just lose interest like the last guy. I don't want to be that guy. Also, more than likely, she would cheat on me as she has a history of that too.
On top of that, my friends find her annoying and whore-y. Due to this, as I associate myself with her they hang out with me less.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by watching the movie '127 Hours'
POST: This just happened a little bit ago so I still feel kind of strange.
I had never seen this movie before but I like James Franco and the story always sounded interesting to me. So I thought "What the hell, I don't have anything better to do" and started it up. I was really enjoying the movie, talking to myself about things that were happening and yelling curse words whenever something bad happened.
Then I got to the part where he begins the process of cutting his arm off. I've never been deeply exposed to bloody/gory things before. I've seen some and have been pretty uncomfortable with it so I just try to avoid it. I never expected that scene to be so horrific. Based on the fact that it was James Franco I expected it to be pretty mild (for whatever reason). I tried to watch this scene but I caught myself looking away and peeking through my fingers to see if it was over.
Then suddenly the urge to vomit takes over me. I rarely vomit and this feeling is just so terrible to me. I then notice that my hearing started to fade out. I live with my mom so I got up to find her and tell her that I wasn't feeling okay. I sat down on the couch in our living room to tell her what was up. My hearing started fading out more and and she tells me to go sit by the toilet. I got up and realized that I was on the verge of passing out. I nearly dropped on my way to the bathroom but made it, still struggling to keep myself sitting up straight. My mom followed me and began talking to me again, now I can't even make out the words she's saying because I pretty much can't hear anything. Then something somewhat marvelous happens. I throw up. Once I barf my hearing starts coming back and I'm able to hold myself up okay. This was also a TIL for me because I've never felt like that before and had no idea how sensitive I am to things like that.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Should I [21F] tell my boyfriend [22M] that I love him after I told him not to say it to me?
POST: I have been dating my boyfriend for four months and two months into the relationship he told me that he loved me. My boyfriend is borderline obsessed with his job, it's by far the most important thing in his life. When he told me he loved me I told him that he didn't. I told him to compare me to his job and think about which one he would pick if he had to choose between us, and not to tell me that he loves me until the answer is me. I'm far more experienced then him in the dating world and I knew I didn't love him then and he agreed that he didn't love me either. Now I'm really falling for him though and when I see him I have to fight to not tell him that I love him. I don't know if I should tell him first because I already shot him down or wait for him to tell me because I will know how much it means if he tells me unprompted. I gave him that standard because I'm afraid I'll always come second to his job and I'm afraid if I tell him I love him now he'll just say it back to me without meaning it in the way I want him to.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I don't believe in ghosts or haunted houses but how else can I explain this incident? Has there ever been an event in your life that has made you second guess your belief in the "paranormal"?
POST: In the first house I had lived in while growing up I was awoken one night by the sound of something shattering. I didn't think much of it as I thought it was one of my older brothers or parents who had dropped a dish or glass in the kitchen. The next morning I go to ask my family if they heard it or knew what it was. They all say no, but a vase in the living room was found broken in front of the fireplace. No one claimed to know anything about it and the circumstances were unusual for a few reasons. The vase was located in a corner of the living room that no one ever walked near for any reason. The entire house was carpeted except for the kitchen and the little area in front of the fireplace. It could not have been knocked over onto the fireplace, it had to have been picked up and moved several feet. And finally, I was fucking awake immediately when I heard it shatter and didn't hear anyone walk away, try to clean it, or even see the light turn on (I can see the living room lights from my bedroom). My family has thought nothing of it, but I haven't forgotten that incident for what must be 15 years now.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, what are your thoughts on LSD?
POST: My boyfriend is 27 years old and still struggling to figure out what he wants to do in life. He tried university and ended up dropping out after the first semester. He has been working at a skateboard shop for the past 6 years with no idea what he wants to do, and describes his life as "floating". After listening to several Joe Rogan podcasts he feels that an LSD trip will allow him to venture into his psyche and figure out what it is that he wants to do. As a non drug user and someone who has always known what they wanted out of life it is hard for me to see his point of view on this. What are your thoughts on using LSD to dig into the psyche in order to find "ones life purpose"?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21/F] with my ex bf [25/M] staying friends need advice.
POST: Me 21f and bf 25m broke up. Staying friend but need advice.
I am in need of advice. Long term bf and I (almost 2 years) recently broke up after taking some time (3 weeks) to think about things. We're both still figuring out who we are and what we want to do in life along the side of our relationship, although it was awesome had a lot of drama. He mostly initiated the break up and I love him so I want to do the best thing for each other so I respected that it should end. We talked in person on Saturday to close things up and had a nice conversation. I talked to him on his drive back home for about an hour or so to just to clarify a few things. What I had gotten from the conversation was we will explore our own identities and do things that are best for us but we remain friends because I think it's healthy and mature. I sort of stated if everything goes well and life heads in a certain direction where we both wanted to get together again and start fresh, we would. However only if it was the right thing and a mutual feeling. I had posted something on here yesterday basically pouring my heart out to gather my thoughts. I shared the post with him because I want to be completely honest with my feelings so I don't feel trapped or something. He didn't take it so well and I felt awful. I apologized and he said it was no respectful to the boundaries we established. He seemed upset and I apologized this morning via text and wished him a better morning. I am not going to contact him for a little bit until this is settled. However my question is, should we remain friends, how is the best way to be mature and go about it? What are some of your experiences with starting a platonic relationship with a past bf/gf?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [21F] worried about my robbed and alone best friend [21 M] on Christmas
POST: I don't really know who else to ask, we're not in a relationship but he is my best friend and maybe you guys will have some suggestions. I need to do something for my best friend.
His name is Ben, we're been close for the past fours years. To give you an idea of the kind of guy he is, he's the person that when I come home from a 10 hour shift to a screaming house, I can call and will meet me at the beach with a warmed up cookie and my favorite song playing. Ben is a caregiver. I can't even count the number of times he's got me out of a rough fix, picked me up from the airport or rescued me from a bad home situation. Basically he is good, the kind of good people don't believe if you tell them about it. We're seniors in college now, but he just graduated.
He's going through a rough time. He just started working a pretty shit job and is on today and tomorrow morning. He didn't have the gas money to drive back to our home town for Christmas anyway and doesn't get paid for a few more days. His parents aren't really helping him financially. He doesn't have a whole lot of money for food and I'm worried he's not eating enough. Tomorrow he will spend Christmas alone and on top of that, the two things he has for distraction, his computer and x-box were both robbed last night. Goddamnit.
I need to do something. I do not have a lot of money myself, but I hate knowing the person who has always been there for me will be hurting, especially on Christmas. Ben's really into tradition, and home stuff so I know being alone above everything else will be getting to him. He deserves better. I'm going to try and get to Burlington on the 26th, and buy him a pizza tonight but does anyone have any other suggestions on how I can help? Anyone been a similar situation? Sorry if this is the wrong subreddit I just don't know who to ask.
Thanks and Happy Holidays
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SUBREDDIT: r/GetMotivated
TITLE: I don't know what I'm skilled at. If anything.
POST: I'm 23, and jobless. I have an associates degree in multimedia, a bachelors degree in game design, and I'm currently attending an MBA program solely to defer my loans.
I feel like I have no "hard skills". I'm trying desperately to start a game development company, but I can't program, and I can't do art. Despite my schooling.
It would seem I have plenty of softskills, but I've found that those don't help if you want to do something interesting with your life.
I can't even get a good job because all I really know how to do is think about things and write, and such.
I have this sneaking suspicion that I do actually have hard skills, but that I don't know what they are. That maybe by lack of self-confidence in this area is somehow masking my ability accurately determine my worth.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me[26/M] with my girlfriend[20F] of 6 months have a different idea about what counts as cheating and her sexuality.
POST: Basically she thinks that it's not cheating for her to have sexual encounters with women unless they are "bi-sexual".
She has had sex with a couple women, including ones with boyfriends and thinks it doesn't constitute cheating for girls to hook up with girls if they don't date other girls. She doesn't have to worry about me hooking up with guys so the arguement of would it be cheating if i hooked up with another guy is moot and doesn't mean shit to her.
--
She wouldn't hook up with another girl if I was there because she would be jealous of me. Also she likes going to female strip clubs but wouldnt go if I was there because she would also be jealous. She thinks that just because she enjoys sexual encounters with women doesnt mean she is bi, because she wouldn't date women. Also she thinks its ok to go to strip clubs with her girlfriends because she wouldn't mind if I went to a male strip club and so it would be irrational for me to be upset about it.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [18F] My FWB[18M] suddenly wants more
POST: I've known this guy for about 9 months, and ever since then we have hooked up every few weeks or so. We live in the same town, and are both seniors but at different high schools so we rarely see each other.
From the very beginning we both made it clear that we weren't looking for a relationship, but did enjoy each other's company and having fantastic sex.
Anyways, in between the times we hooked up, we talked very little. He would call me or I him and we'd fuck and not hear from each-other for a week or two.
The last time we had sex was about a month ago, and it was especially good. He called me a few nights ago and just wanted to talk- and we did for about 4 hours. About everything, we really just click. But we already knew this. He has called me every night since and has been texting me during the day-VERY out of the ordinary. He even asked to take me to prom.
I enjoy hearing from him but I can't help but think that something is up? We both will be going to college soon so I think a relationship is out of the question, but I also don't want to hurt his feelings because as he has told me before that he cannot handle rejection.
What do you guys think is happening and how should I handle it?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 M] with my date [24 F] 4th date last night, think we might be in a relationship now but not sure
POST: Like the titles says, we had our 4th date last night which was dinner and then a spa at her place after. We're taking things really slow and as such have only shared a couple of breif kisses, hugs, and a little hand holding.
We have admitted liking each other and liking where things are going and last night we were talking about how we have both always not liked dating for the reasons of being anxious, not knowing where you stand, and being nervous about all the little hurdles. We've both been single for a while and spoke about how neither of us don't really know how to date (even though our dates have been really nice so far).
I said to her after we spoke about this "how about we just bypass the dating phase and move to the next step". She seemed to think about it for a second and then said she would like that and we agreed to do it. But, thinking about it now. What is the next step? I was thinking at the time, the next step would be actually being in a relationship. How do I ask her about this? I want to just straight up say "are we in a relationship now?", but I'm worried that she will either think I meant something else when we spoke about it, will reject me, or whatever. Whats the best way to suggestively ask where we stand with it?
I playfully said earlier "would you be up for putting our new status on fb yet or should we wait a bit more?", in an effort to see if she was on the same page and she said "I'm not much of a fb person so if it's okay a bit longer would be good :)". I'm so rusty at this dating game and have no idea how to find out for sure where we're at.
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SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: How to get over him?
POST: The love of my life recently broke up with me(maybe 2 weeks ago), because of long distance issues(he moved a couple hours away for a job.) This guy meant everything to me, and he was perfect in my eyes. I don't think I had ever felt this way about someone before, I mean, I loved this guy, I really did. I have been trying to get over him, but nothing works. He is always constantly in my thoughts, and I just don't want to give up. I know I have to though, because fighting for him seems pointless, I have already tried to get him back and tried to work things out with him. I need to give up and get over it, but I'm not sure how. Advice?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My[23M] girl[25F]riend of over 2 years told me she wants an open relationship. Not sure what to do or think.
POST: My girlfriend told me this morning she can't see herself being monogamous long term relationship and that she, eventually (in her 40s and beyond), wants to be in an open relationship.
I was devastated by this, it came out of absolute nowhere, she has never ever once in our relationship even given the slightest hint that this was something she was interested in and I don't know how to handle it.
Thinking of her having sex with another human being makes me sick to my stomach. I've felt physically and emotionally numb since she dropped that bomb on me this morning and I was barely able to hold a conversation with her after. The thought of being in an open relationship makes me feel completely and utterly inadequate. Like i'm not good enough for her so she needs to get more elsewhere. When I brought this up, she accused me of being selfish and self-centered and that "I shouldn't be so naive to think that anyone can be happy with one person for 30, 40+ years".
Currently in our relationship we have sex, once every 2 weeks, she has an incredibly low libido and I have a substantially higher libido but I am ok with it because our relationship, to me anyways, is so much more than sex. We talk about sex constantly, our fantasies our desires our fetishes etc and this topic has never once come up before ever.
In every other aspect of our relationship I am incredibly happy and satisfied, we're on the same page about almost everything else. I truly believed I had found a partner I could see myself sharing the rest of my life with, but after this morning, I just don't know anymore. Has anyone ever been in this kind of a situation before and had things turn out alright? Please, any thoughts, advice or opinions on my situation would be greatly welcome.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me (27F) and my friend (34F) have an ambiguous relantionship and I think she want to end it. I'm gay, she's straight.
POST: We are friends for only one year and I was in a long term relationship with an other girl (6 years long). We became friends rapidly and we instantly connected on another level than just friendship. We were cuddling often and we would be very close emotionally and physically although never crossing any boundaries. We would often say that we love each other very much and that being together feel so good and that it's so easy to be who we really are with each other. We've also traveled together. This travel has brought us even closer. Sometimes, there was very subtle allusions that we could have sex together, but we were drunk most of the times when things like this were mentioned. She became very curious about other girls but will only talk about it with me.
Since then, I've broked up with my girlfriend (for other reasons than this particular relationship) and I'm pretty sure I'm not in love with my friend. But, now, she is putting a distance between us saying that she want to be closer to her male friend and she need the kind of relationship that we have but with a guy, that she is missing the affection from a man. Continuing, anyway, to tell me that I'm very important to her and that our relationship is unique and precious for her.
I don't want to lose her as a friend but I also don't want to lose this particular relationship that we have. What should I do? Back off? We've never talk about this ambiguity in the past, should I talk to her now? Also, she's the kind of girl that would often put the fault on others. And, yes, an other thing, she's working with my ex-girlfriend and they have been coworkers/friend for 5 years.
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SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: M[20] ending something with [19]
POST: A month ago my girlfriend of over two and a half years broke up with me, wanting space. That was all fine and dandy. However, she continues to stay in touch with me and she wants to hang out, but only on her terms. Everything I ask her to do is answered with no. She always says it's too soon and too datelike, even if I just ask her to play video games (which is ok when she suggests it). She sends mixed signals when we are together (laying with her head against me and getting very close physically). I'd like to tell her, in a way that leaves an possibility for a future relationship, that I don't want to spend time with her as just a friend because she treats me like a boyfriend but I get none of the perks. What would you do, Reddit?
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU knocking out my sister in law.
POST: So this happened three hours ago.
To preface, my wife and I are somewhat antisocial and rarely, if ever, have people over to our house. We also live in a bad neighborhood and frequently hear of break-in's and hear gunshots weekly.
My wife was working late last night so I decided to have some drinks and play xbox. Eventually I called it a night before she arrived home. Being a bit buzzed, she didn't wake me up when she got into bed.
Fast forward to about 3am when I awoke to the sound of someone rummaging around in the kitchen. Our home is small and the bedroom door is about three large steps from the stove...
I looked over and saw that my wife was asleep next to me and I immediately panicked, thinking that someone had broken in and that we were in danger. I thought to call 911 but I had left my cell phone in the living room, so I jumped out of bed and did the only thing my hungover, sleepy mind could think to do.. I rushed the shadowy figure in the kitchen and tackled it to the ground violently.
Whoever I tackled hit their head pretty hard on the counter top and was knocked out cold on the floor.
I ran over to the light switch and turned on the light - only to find (to my horror) that the figure was my 19 year old sister in law. (she weighs probably 115lbs soaking wet)
Turns out my wife and her decided it would be easier to carpool to their parents home for thanksgiving, so she picked her up after work the night before to stay the night.
My wife thought it was hysterical in some twisted sibling rivalry kind of way. But now I get to explain to my father-in-law why his little princess has a bruised shoulder and a goose egg on her head.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, have you ever intensely disliked someone and they didn't have a clue?
POST: At my previous job I had a supervisor who loved me, he fawned over my job performance, wanted to hang out outside of work (which I never did), and just generally went out of his way to get my opinion on things and cater to me. He didn't know, but I HATED him. I know, it seems somewhat backhanded to dislike someone who goes out of his way to cater to you, but I didn't dislike him for how he treated me, I disliked him for how he treated everyone else
He had a group of employees that he completely catered to, he wanted to advance our careers, he wanted to be our friends, etc. To everyone else he was a nightmare, he'd intentionally assign these other people awful shifts, he'd make them work on holidays, he'd dismiss their complaints and concerns out of hand, he'd treat them like second class citizens basically. And he'd intentionally sabotage their relationships with management, which I had witnessed him do, and heard him brag about on numerous occasions. It was strange, the people he liked and disliked seemed kind of arbitrary, but I did notice that the people he liked were disproportionately male, and often geeky and/or gamers, but he did pick up a few others along the way that had no connection to those characteristics.
Anyway, because of the way he back stabbed and undermined people he didn't like, I intensely disliked him. And you might ask why, if he liked me, didn't I stick my neck out for the people he treated badly? I did, but he laughed it off and said they didn't have it as bad as I thought they did.
Fast forward a year, and now I'm at a new, and better paying job and I get a phone call from him, wanting me to hook him up with an interview. And I was briefly very confused, I thought to myself, "But I HATE you, why would you think I'd go out of my way for you?" Then it occured to me, he never knew.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by getting frustrated too easily
POST: So there I was, probably about 4ish hours ago, playing School Idol Festival. For those of you who don't know, it's a weeb rhythm game that's really popular in Japan, but has a very large international player base. (Game footage:
Well, I'd just recently updated to the Android 5.1 OS, and had been having problems with the game since. Stuttering, broken audio, looping animations, the works. I'd had enough. Frustrated, I immediately went to my settings and uninstalled the game, went to the Play Store, and reinstalled the game.
This is when I realized my FU. I opened the newly installed game, and immediately had to download updates. I figured it was necessary. I'd just reinstalled. Goes with computers, right? Well, the game opens up again, and it starts asking me to make a new account. I'm like, "dafuq?" I see the Data Recovery button, and my heart sinks in realization.
I'd forgotten to write down my data recovery code. I'm nearly in tears within seconds, and I'm running around the internet for customer support. Guess what language it's in? Frackin' Moonspeak. Thank the gods for translation options, so I'm making the ticket, and it asks for my User ID. Fuck. I don't have that, either.
It's at this point I remember that my sister plays the game, too. She's the on who recommended it to me, after all. I go to give her a call. Straight to voicemail. I decide to play a different game while I wait for her to call or text me back.
That game starts stuttering, and a fairly large man is suddenly in tears.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Has anyone else's pet pretended to be injured?
POST: A day or two ago I was playing with my dog, [Sprinkles](
We were rolling around on the floor and all of a sudden she just got up and walked (well, limped) away with her left front paw in the air. She limped around the house, hid under beds, and completely avoided everyone at my house for a day and a half.
I felt so terrible. I thought I hurt my little pup somehow. Then, around 1 or 2 pm on the second day of her limping around and being "injured", I called for her to come get some food and she came running up to me like she was never hurt. She's been fine since then.
So, Reddit, has your pet ever faked an injury?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I still love my ex, and I don't know what to do.
POST: I [F25] have a very tumultuous relationship with me ex[M24]. We've known each other since high school. He and I met under very complicated circumstances and it was during such an impressionable age that I loved him with such fervent unconditional love as did he that we can never quite forget each other. He joined the marines a couple years ago and we've had a variety of long distance relationships, on and off relationships, and I always find myself longing for him. He is the only person that I've felt so passionate about. During the relationship, we would fight so much and things were so bad when they were bad. But when things were good, they were so good. I never felt so adored. I feel like that relationship keeps me from moving on even though I'm in a relationship now, I feel like I'm settling. The guy I'm with seems so neutral in comparison. I feel like I'm just going through the motions some how. I don't know what to do. I can't forget him and I feel like if I stay in this relationship, I'm going to regret it. I feel like I'm living with a broken heart. I don't know if I'm callous for being with the guy I'm with now but in a way, I love him too. I feel like I will never love anyone as much as my ex and I feel like the guy that I'm with doesn't love me as much as my ex did or does. But I also feel like I am feeling this way because I keep comparing him to my ex. THe funny thing, is my ex is kind of mean and has a really hot temper. But he's the only one that knows everything about me; all my secrets, fears, and how to make me laugh, happy, cry. After that relationship, I just am not who I used to be. I don't know, there's so many details to this situation and I wish I had someone to talk to about this but...the situation just doesn't allow for it. I just need someone to talk to.
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SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: New to running. I've read several posts on here and can't find answers to what I need to know.
POST: For a little bit of background: I've always hated running. Until recently, the most I have ever ran was a mile. However, a few weeks ago I started running with a friend and fell in love with it for some reason. It's really important to me now and I want to make sure I can do it correctly and keep doing it.
I'm having a couple of problems though. After my third run (we run 3.1 miles because my goal is to do a 5k eventually) I started to get pains in the back of my calves. I have been to a running store and had them film me running and help me with picking out shoes and support. I currently have a pair of Brooks, but I can't remember which one and I'm not at home right now so I can't see what they are. These are the best shoes I have ever ran in, they are very light but seem to give me the perfect support when I run. Before them I used to get a lot of pain in my knees and ankle, but that doesn't happen anymore.
I took a few days off for the pain. We had been running 3 times a week. Last night was my first time returning to the run and I could only make it a mile before I started to get pain in my calves again, but this time on the sides of my legs that are on the inside portion of my leg. The previous pain in the back wasn't there any longer. I'm wondering if I was just out of shape and my muscles are getting used to being worked or if something else may be up. Also, I'm not sure if it may just be my running style. Honestly, I don't know how I run. I don't understand the different types of running very well and I don't really pay attention to what I'm doing because I don't know what I should be looking for.
To describe the pain a little more, it's like my muscles are very tight as if they are being flexed on their own and won't relax. Any advice anyone could give would be great.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Boyfriend [23M] left me [23F], but we're back together. How do I get my friends to forgive him too?
POST: My boyfriend of over 6 years left me for two months for another girl while I was away for work and he was attending law school. I have already forgiven him and he has expressed how sorry he is through both his words and his actions. He has gotten rid of everything from those two months and doesn't talk to anyone he met through her not to mention he is extremely patient and honestly answers all of my questions.
The problem though is that I don't know how to get my friends/family to forgive him too. All they seem to be able to see is that he broke my heart and left me for a girl he met 48 hours earlier at a bar.
His friends/family and our mutual don't have any qualms with us being back together but my friends do. If you were my friend what would I need to explain or what would he have to do to get forgiveness? (He is watching this post too)
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SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: Friends/family telling me to stop losing weight at $randomWeight?
POST: **First, the minutiae -** Height: 5'11"(180cm) SW: 277lbs(125kg) CW: 228lbs(103kg) GW:180lbs(81kg)
**Second, the tactics -** Strategies for weight loss have included nothing other than increased levels of activities including walking and jogging along and counting calories via MFP. Current levels of caloric consumption are between 1,300kCal/day and 1,500kCal/day. Current levels of activities are the /r/c25k program.
**Third, the issue -** I'm fortunate to be surrounded by a herd of supportive and encouraging friends/family when it comes to my health via weight loss. However, lately they've been asking me when I'm going to stop losing weight. My response is that my goal is to hover somewhere in the 180-190lbs range. This weight would still put me in the "overweight" BMI category but I feel comfortable with that. Generally the reaction is that they believe at that weight I'll be "too skinny."
Now, my body type does seem to consist of a somewhat large frame and I have no delusions of ever being slender per se, but I would like to get some input from the /r/loseit community to see if anyone else has dealt with people inadvertently discouraging them from losing this much weight.
When I'm at my GW I'll have lost just shy of 100lbs which is a significant amount of mass to say the least. I just feel that I'm getting some backlash from folks who, overall, are very supportive of me improving my health but are also verbally warning me that 180lbs is far too skinny.
Perhaps it's also important to note that I live in the Southern U.S. where obesity seems to be the norm.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I get my friend to realize that she is dating a manipulative jerk without jeopardizing our friendship?
POST: About nine months ago my friend (20f) began dating a boy (21m) (I'll call him Frank) who I believe has only damaged her self confidence and brings her down. Their relationship if very off and on- sometimes they are "officially together" meaning they cannot date other people, and other times they are in an "open relationship" or are "friends with benefits." My friend has expressed to him many times that she wants to be in a closed committed relationship, but he prefers to have the freedom to date and pursue other women. Each time this happens, I try to tell my friend that they are clearly not on the same page and she needs to find someone who wants the same thing she does. However, she continues to hold out hope that he will change.
Frank also has pressed her sexually to try things that I know she was originally not comfortable with. He also tells her things along the lines of "I know you are in love with me but I don't love you."
Frank is very into philosophy and discovering the deeper meaning to human relationships and behavior. He constantly over analyzes things she does and then uses information he reads to justify treating her like garbage basically.
A major incident happened last week when he pushed my friend against a table so hard she got bruises and told her to "obey" him. My friend called me about this extremely upset. Later, he told her he was only trying to initiate sex by being dominate like in the book 50 Shades of Grey. He also got mad at my friend for telling me this and told her he feels it is disrespectful to talk about their sex life and relationship to others.
Basically I need your advice reddit, How can I help my friend? Should I continue to encourage her to leave this guy or will that only hurt our friendship? She has already grown apart from other friends who can't stand this guy and I don't want to push her away from me.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I have a really racist family, but I'm an interracial relationship, and I want them to like my boyfriend. I'm [15f] he's [15 m]
POST: So, if you look though my post history you'll find out that my immediate family ,except for my older brother are white nationalists. So, they''re not as extreme as my extended family who are white supremacists
For the past 10 months I've been dating a hispanic class mate. He and his parents were born in Canada (We're in California btw, he moved here last year) so he's only racially hispanic, and not culturally hispanic. They're also pretty well off, and they're not ghetto. For that reason my parents have disapproved of our relationship, but have tolerated me being with him. They think it's just a phase I'll grow out of
Anyway,
I read stories about people getting disowned by their parents when they turn 18 because the did something their parents disapproved of. My parents haven't threatened to kick me out when I turn 18 but I don't want to take any risks. I've come up with a few ideas
1. Pretend to break up with him but continue our relationship in secret
Probably won't work, my other older brother goes to the same school as us
2. Convince them to approve of our relationship.
I think they dislike him less than other hispanics so it's worth a shot I guess... Or maybe they dislike him more because he's dating me.
I could tell them things about him they don't know so they'll approve of our relationship.
I don't think they'd just abandon their ideology like that though
3. Run away when we turn 18
Works in movies might work in real life
nah.
My oldest brother is an actually white supremacist, so he's the biggest obstacle in getting my parents approval. He's away at college most of the time though.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I've (32M) meandered around in life for a number of years now without passion. Now that I know what my dream life would be, I realize it's unattainable. I'm defeated and have nothing to live for anymore.
POST: Title pretty much says it.
For a while I had a job I really loved, I was full of passion. Politics in that job grew for a minor annoyance to a major hinderance and I was forced to walk away. For around five years since then, I've been wandering around from job to job, not really finding any passion or purpose in any of them. I'd attempted to fill that void in things and projects outside of work, but to no real avail.
I've been seeing a therapist in the past few months to attempt to help with this feeling of uselessness and lack of purpose. She'd helped me to realize the things that I'd dream to attain. I wanted to mean something, I wanted to be someone. When I was a teenager, I idiolized the people on the show The West Wing. I realized I wanted to get back to that. I attained a degree in Communications in college in pursuit of that, but haven't really utilized it at all. After I graduated, I got good paying but meaningless jobs in social media and marketing and strayed away from my real passion where I wanted to work to curate the message and story of something that mattered ..perhaps a high ranking government office like in the show I loved, or perhaps for a meaningful company like I looked up to like Apple, Pixar, Lucasfilm, etc.
After spending a few weeks to look into those jobs, I realize that dream is now impossible. I can't dream of being able to afford living in towns where those dreams are. I can't dream of being able to realistically get one of those jobs over the thousands of people far more qualified than me. I can't dream of being able to compete with those fresh out of college who have the advantages of youth and vigor.
My dreams are all dead. They're unattainable. I sometimes wonder if I should be too. Should I even bother?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [19 F] can't get my ex out of my mind [19 F]
POST: Recently, my ex split up with me. We had been going out ~4 years.
The relationship wasn't perfect but we definitely loved each other and had a lot of good times.
All of a sudden, she breaks up with me saying that she just wanted to be alone, and that the love had faded (even though, days before, she was confessing her love and making plans about our future).
I know she cares for me (or cared), but now she doesn't want any contact at all until she says so.
How do I deal with this? I still love her. I'm not clinging to some fantasy, or scared of being alone, **I genuinely love her with all of my heart**. Am I stupid for thinking there is hope? She said there isn't any, but she has a history of being over the top and irrational.
I really want to get back with her, but I don't want to be sitting around waiting for her if there is never going to be a chance we could be together again. I don't want to jeopardise what little chance there is that we could be friends.
I'm trying to let go for her sake, but it's hard letting go of these feelings.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: tifu by forgetting how to poo properly.
POST: I went into work today expecting an important email from a potential employer. The day goes on and a coworker goes on a tacobell run for the office, I being the sure stomach man that I am, ordered a delicious quesorito. short story made shorter, I have an ungodly hellfire brewing behind my sphincter as I am answering said important email on my phone. I rush to the bathroom (still typing) go into the first stall and quickly pull down my pants and let the torrent spew forth (still typing) and as crap sprays out of my bum, I feel my waist being pulled on and look down to realize that I did not pull down my briefs as well. for the first time in 20 some odd years, I was pooping my pants. I slip my phone into my pocket and put my clever head to work as I try to find a way out of it. The only logical solution was to ditch the underwear. I pull them off, reaking of shit, and stuff them into the corner behind the toilet, wash my hands and run out of the bathroom passing my supervisor on the way out. Fast forward 10 min, I catch my boss staring at me with an awestruck, disgusted look on his face, and in that moment, I knew that he knew.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My GF[18F] went streaking with two of my [18M] friends and one of my [18F] friends. Do I [18M] have any right to be jealous/upset that she hung out with my male friends naked? or am I overreacting?
POST: My girlfriend and I have been dating on and off for two years. I've broken up with her twice over the course of our relationship because I felt jealous about her hanging out with her ex boyfriends or telling me about other guys she finds attractive. Since we last got back together, I've apologized for getting upset over such insignificant things, and I realize how ridiculous it was of me to break up with her over them. For the past few months, I've been reminding myself that she loves me and that whatever it is I'm jealous about is probably nothing at all.
Last weekend, she went on a class trip to Nashville with pretty much all of my friends and some of hers. Today, she came home and told me about all the crazy stuff she did on the trip. She mentioned that she went streaking with two of my male friends and one of my female friends. I don't mind at all that she was naked with my female friend, and I honestly at this point wouldn't care if she was naked with her ex boyfriends or her other male friends, but the idea of her getting naked with the two male friends of mine makes me feel extremely upset, especially considering they're barely even mutual friends of ours. I've been trying to waive it off as her just having harmless fun, and I haven't talked to her yet about how upset I am over it, but I honestly don't know whether this is just another small thing to be jealous about or if it crosses the line of what you should and shouldn't do in a relationship.
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SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: Help With My 3 Week Old!
POST: My wife and I have a 3 week old daughter (first child) and she is amazing. We couldn't be happier...until about 9pm when the shit hits the fan. Last Friday we started trying to transition her from the bassinet in our room to her crib in the nursery. Since then she refuses to go to sleep any time after 9pm. It doesn't matter if we are holding her, rocking her, whatever. She will start to drift off to sleep, fall asleep for a couple minutes, then wake up again crying (even if being held). We have tried feeding her, burping her, changing her, using a sound machine, everything. Last night she was up most of the night, sleeping for about an hour at one point, and that was because we brought her back in our room (probably counter productive, I know). As a point of reference, she was sleeping for 2-4 hours at a time before we tried moving her in to her crib. My wife (who is a teacher) has been kind enough to let me sleep most of the night so that I can get up at 5am for work, but her patience is wearing thin. I help when I can, but I also have to be functional at work. Any advice as to what we can do to help make the transition to the crib a little easier?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [20F] parents' past infidelity making it hard to cope in relationship [21M]
POST: Some backstory: when I was 15, my dad cheated on my mom (married for 21 years) and caused an insurmountable amount of stress on my mom and I. It happened suddenly in a marriage that both of us thought was healthy. While I remember the process of him leaving being the worst weeks of my life, I went to therapy and I deal well with my father, even to the point of joking about it with mom.
Very recently (little less than a year ago) I started dating my boyfriend. I couldn't be happier and I often think about how lucky I am. However, I have intrusive thoughts about him cheating on a daily basis, especially when I do not feel secure about my attractiveness. I have heard this is common, but last night it went to shit.
We were texting and somebody on social media had made a joke essentially saying that men cheat when women aren't attractive enough. He thought this was funny, I did not. Usually I deal with these situations alright, but him pressing and defending the joke and getting mad at me reminded me of these fears regarding him, resulting in hours of on-and-off panic attacks. I have not spoken to him since. I do not want to talk about the panic attacks, because he will (as usual) brush them off as me overreacting. He knows what happened with my parents but has said it's "not a big deal."
I need to know how to deal with this. I've had enough panic attacks about infidelity, but this instance reminded me of how much stress it puts on the relationship. Everything he says I search for things that indicate he would cheat and I'm beginning to think I should break up with him because I can't take it anymore.
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SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: A question about arms and cardio
POST: I'm a 22 year old girl. So I've been really trying to lose weight for about a month now. I started off doing a little bit of cardio with my work outs (30-45 mins.), but I was mostly doing weight lifting and toning (45-60 mins).
The last two weeks I've started doing all cardio workouts (45-90 mins. per workout, depending on how much time I have that day) because I thought it would be better to burn fat before toning up.
All this cardio combined with Weight Watchers has given me really good results and the weight is practically melting off everywhere - except my arms. They are completely unchanged and, unfortunately, the part of my body I am most self conscious about.
Should I be doing exercises to tone my arms? Am I doing something wrong?
If this is the wrong place to be posting this, please point me in the right direction!
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (20M) want to meet someone but can't find anyone who wants an actual relationship. Am I looking in the wrong places?
POST: Heyo, big fan of this sub. I read it nearly every day at work and you guys are pretty great with your advice.
The title says it all, I'm looking for a serious relationship but I can't seem to find people my age who want the same thing. I'm not outright propositioning people to marry me or anything, but I feel like where I live, London, people my age are only looking for casual encounters and the ones who aren't are ironically enough, in relationships!
How would you suggest I find someone similarly minded? I've tried online on things like Tinder and OkCupid but I haven't really met anyone that I click with who wants the same things.
In case it's relevant, I have a pretty great well paying job, I play piano, recently started gym and actively try to be proactive in my life.
Any advice at all would be great! Also, I'm feeling a bit off so I apologise if I come across as rude or something, thanks for taking the time to read this. :)
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: My house has recently been robbed. any advice?
POST: So over Spring break two weeks ago (the days between the 10th and the 18th of March) my house was burglarized. Nothing was damaged, and only my television and my room mate's Xbox360 were taken. Shit happens. I filed a police report and that is about all I can do. Until recently, when some new developments came up...
I bought myself a new Xbox360 because my birthday is coming up. I downloaded my room mate's old profile, which has about a month or so left of prepaid Xbox Live membership. I tried to watch some Netflix on it, and lo and behold: someone was logged in to the Xbox Live account already. Whoever took my room mate's Xbox was using it for free netflix That I pay for! Naturally I changed the passwords for EVERYTHING, so they no longer have access to any of my room mate's Xbox Live features any more.
The reason I'm asking for advice:
Since they have logged into the Xbox Live account, I want to know if it is possible to, somehow, find out where the IP address was coming from? Or is this entire thing a lost cause and I may as well let it go? No renter's insurance, so there's nothing I can do besides file a police report and twiddle my thumbs. I just got over the fact that I got robbed and they got away with it, but when I realized they were taking advantage of services that I pay for, that really made my blood boil. IS IT NOT ENOUGH THAT YOU ROBBED ME OF MY VIDYA??
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [20M] having trouble moving on from my ex-girlfriend [21F], four months since the breakup and I'm still thinking about it - how to definitively move on?
POST: My ex-gf broke up with me a little over four months ago - since then, there was some on and off contact and we tried the whole staying friends thing for a while until I realized that I was still holding out hope that we would get back together.
She now has a new boyfriend, and I've more or less cut off all contact, but I still find myself thinking about her from time to time, about our breakup, and what could have been. We also share a large amount of mutual friends, so it's not uncommon for her stuff to appear on my newsfeed on facebook or to hear about her in college club activities we both are members of. I've asked friends and family for advice and have had some really good conversation, but I can't shake the feeling that there's just something missing from my life.
This is an incredibly problematic mindset to have - I've done my best to just focus on myself for now (started lifting and talking to new people) but it still hurts and I occasionally find myself thinking bad thoughts and sorta just sink into despair for a little while before it goes away again.
This woman was the first person I was ever in a relationship with, had sex with, and it lasted for just shy of two years before she finally decided in the last two months that "there was no spark" left in our love life and that it couldn't be fixed. I'm struggling to let go - how can I make peace with myself?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 19F struggling with being rejected for sex by 20M SO
POST: My boyfriend and I have been dating for three years. We work well on most fronts, but sex has always been a compromise. I enjoy sex and would prefer to be having sex at least once a day. I settled for 3-4 times a week because that was more comfortable for him and I could live with it.
However, lately it's been difficult trying to get him to have sex once a week. I realize we're both stressed with finals and jobs, but it's killing me. I've asked twice in the past couple of days to have sex (with all the hugging and kissing and playful prompting), but he rejected me in favor of Assassin's Creed.
Generally I can be pretty understanding, but it's starting to kill *my* libido. He'll promise me sex (he hasn't followed through), but at this point I know that if he were to initiate, I would probably reject him because he's hurt my feelings, my ego's been stomped all over, and I just don't feel sexy/wanted anymore.
I guess my question is how can I handle this? I don't want to insult him when talking about it and I don't want sex to become just another thing he has to do. Furthermore, I don't want this to become a vicious cycle of rejection, hurt feelings, and stopped initiation.
I love him dearly. I don't want to make this worse.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Someone [21F] tried to copy off my [20F] exam today, so I told the teacher afterwards. Was I wrong?
POST: Today I had a university exam which lasted for four hours. Before the papers were handed out, the girl next to me asked if I could help her if there were some questions she didn't know. I said no, it's an exam. During the second part (more difficult) she asked to see my answers for a certain question and tried to copy what I was writing. It wasn't possible to switch sweats so I moved my arm forward to try and block her view.
I didn't think this was right, so when I turned it in to the teacher, I told him that she had tried to copy my answers. He asked if I let her and I said no.
In my mind it wasn't wrong to tell him because she did try to cheat. But someone I mentioned it to in passing said I shouldn't have told the teacher. They think it was a wrong/crappy attitude to have told on her, and it should be none of my business whether she cheats or not, and maybe it's not a subject that interests her and she's just trying to pass for the credit; so it would be bad of me to cause her to fail (??) because it's just an exam?
Basically they think that I shouldn't care about her grade, and she will know herself that she didn't do the work / learn the material and it will be on her conscience that she had to cheat to pass, and it's not up to me to screw her over by telling the teacher.
I think it's wrong by principle, and if she really just "trying to pass", the exam is not so hard and a passing grade is definitely possible if you've just showed up to classes and listened to the teacher.
I don't know what the teacher will do; I don't think he will do much, since I don't think she saw anything of my answers in the end, so her answers will be what she was able to put down. Is there a chance he'll deduct my grade for telling on her? Should I feel guilty?
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SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I'm in College and what do I do?
POST: I know I have posted before with questions to this nature as an attempt to gather information, but what do I do? I tell my self just to talk to people, I do, but I have a problem with social anxiety. I am trying to join clubs at my college but that is to no avail. (I know the school year just started and I'm only one month in but still). Dating isn't the only issue. I haven't made any friends in College, sure I have meet a few people and say hi to them. I've always been told that College is my time, and it's not like I expect people to just walk up and talk to me. I know I have to throw my self out there, but I just can't. I distance myself because of that fear I guess, I'm not exactly sure. What can I do to help over come my anxiety to better improve my dating life and friendships?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [25 M] can afford my friend's [24M] expensive destination wedding but think it is too much money
POST: About a year ago a friend of mine for 10+ years asked me to be in his wedding. I agreed but not formally, at that time knowing that it was probably going to be in Mexico. This was a year ago and no details were known. Fast forward to now, he just told me today where the wedding was going to be and what days. It's going to be in Cancun at one of those crazy expensive resorts during an expensive time to travel.
Basically for 3 or 4 nights it will be almost $3200 for me and my girlfriend. For me alone it would be $2100. Checked with the travel sites (travelocity, etc...) and they say $2600 for both or $1800 alone. Will have to get a suit/tux at a cost of another couple hundred dollars. To me, this is a crazy amount of money to ask your friends to spend.
The problem is, I can afford it. I work in tech and make good money but I am a saver. I am trying to pay off my house and burning $2 or 3 thousand for 3 days is just very irresponsible to me. I am doing very well financially and he knows this so I simply cannot have the excuse of not being able to pay for it like a few of our friends are pulling.
I just cannot justify this expense. The resort they chose is $500/night. I would never, ever, even consider spending that kind of money on a hotel even for my own wedding night. How can I possibly get out of this without ending our friendship or am I being unreasonable since I can afford it?
I should say he is the type that will just not understand why I wouldn't want to do this as we have completely different outlooks on finances.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [38 m] with my [32 f] girlfriend. How can we work through a rough spot?
POST: As the title says we've hit a tough spot. I have crippling panic attacks and nightmares that interfere with normal daily life sometimes.
It screwed up my plans for Father's Day, which I feel horrible about.
But, my girlfriend seems to think that my withdrawal from normal life is something deliberate. I tried to explain that I was have panic attacks and she kept asking me why. I keep telling her that sometimes they happen for no apparent cause and she acted like I was full of crap. So now with her passive aggressiveness, I don't even feel like trying to talk to her at all.
I'm not sure where to go from here.
Also, we've been together for 4 years and lived together for about 7 months.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [25/f] Do I just just give up on my marriage?
POST: The past year of my marriage has been pretty rocky, I had a daughter in may of 2013, and suffered from PPD. I started to not care about anything but taking care of my daughter so my husband and our apartment suffered. Because of that my husband and I started to fight a lot. I ended up pulling myself out of the depression when we moved into our new house, but my husband didn't seem to care. He was just ready to end the marriage because of all the fighting. About a month and a half ago I took my daughter and went to stay with my cousin, it lasted 4 days before my husband asked me to come back home to make things work. But in the month I've been home he hasn't tried to talk about things and fix anything. And he now says he's not physically attracted to me anymore. And he's not exactly innocent of problems either, he was talking to other girls and sexting with them, but I've sense forgiven him for that, because I was partly to blame because of my depression. So I'm not even taking that into account really but thought I should state that. I've brought up counselling to him and he was all for it, but we don't have insurance. And when I found free counselling he suddenly didn't want to talk to strangers about our problems and said we would fix them ourselves. But then he never really followed through with it. And there have been times when he goes back on saying he is unhappy, and all that.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What are some examples of a movie exploiting the expectations of an audience based on that movie's own advertising.
POST: this requires a little explanation, but please bear with me.
So, The Avengers has so far been the biggest movie of the summer, and, not surprisingly, it had a huge ad campaign. Practically everybody who went to see the movie already knew by heart the exchange between Captain America and Iron Man (Cap: "Big man in a suit of armor; take that away, and what are you?" Stark: "Genius, Billionaire, Playboy Philanthropist.")
In the preview, Tony Stark gives off the line with his classic Stark snarkiness and a big grin, playing the line for laughs, but in the movie, the exchange takes place in the middle of a heated debate, with tempers mounting on all sides, and he gives the line in an undertone of loathsome disgust. Now, of course it's normal for certain parts from the trailers to be changed or removed from the final cut of the movie, but this is different. The way that Stark gives the line in the film is in direct contrast to the audience's expectations: an element that was meant to be lighthearted is instead used in one of the heaviest scenes in the movie. For future audiences (or for anyone who somehow managed to miss all of the commercials), there's nothing wrong or incomplete about the way the line is given (or the scene as a whole), but for those who were already immersed in the advertising, it gives an extra little oomph to that scene.
So my question is, are there other examples of things like this? Other movies that deliberately misrepresented some aspect of the movie in their ad campaign, be it a single line or an entire theme or plot arc, so that the audience would be thrown off when they actually saw the movie for the first time? Something that would be lost on people who hadn't seen the ads?
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SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Suggestion/Advice for me (29M) asking a girl (mid-20sF) out at her job
POST: I need your help reddit. I have never asked a girl out at her job before and I am wondering if that is a good idea. The girl is a personal banker at my local bank. After I met her for the first time, I have been there couple of more times since then and whenever I walk in, she always helps me out. I was thinking of asking her out, but I am not sure since its at her job, it might make it unconformable for her. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I should go about it?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [23/m] Just discovered my girlfriend (23/f) has been in a secret sugar daddy/baby relationship. We're moving in together in two weeks.
POST: We have been dating for almost 2 years and long distance the past six months. Recently I went to visit her at her family's house and used her computer, by chance opening up an email between her and someone who I learned was her sugar daddy (until just a week ago).
I confronted her and she admitted to it. The relationship had been going on the past four months. He gave her money, bought her shiny things, in exchange for dinner and sex twice a month. We have been planning on moving in together since January, waiting for the opportunity to arrive in July.
She says she was worried about money. She doesn't have a job where we're moving and she wanted to be comfortable (this is not very true; she has enough cash on hand to last a few months). She said she never wanted me to find out. She wanted to end this and then to bury it and start a new chapter. The email exchange I read was their back and forth after she had ended things between them.
After a lot of talking, I didn't end things. In fact, I even agreed to stay together and go ahead with moving in. I want to forgive her for this; I believe she did this for the money/power/excitement of the sex work and not for the romance. I love her and I believe her when she says she loves me.
Is it insane to move in right after this comes to light? Is it crazy to keep on with the relationship? Does anyone have advice on how to move past and act of dishonesty - but not of disloyalty? I'm angry at her - something I've never felt. But I also still care deeply and believe in the sincerity of her regret. It's not the sex with another guy that bothers me (for the most part). It's the lies and the secrecy.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I [30M] motivate my fiance [34F] of 10 years to lose weight?
POST: My fiance and I will be getting married in September, and for the past five months we have been trying to get in better shape.
The problem is, its working for me, and not working for her. I'm down about 50 pounds, but she weighed herself yesterday, and is exactly the same weight as when she started. This is getting her discouraged to point where she just wants to give up and cancel her gym membership.
To be clear, I want her to lose weight for her sake. She is very unhappy with her self. She gets depressed when she tries on clothes and they don't fit well. I love her no matter what she looks like, but I think she'd be much happier if she dropped some weight. Or even just saw some progress.
I'm the cook, and I work really hard making healthy meals. But I work 4 evenings a week, so I can only cook 3 evenings a week. If I'm not there to make her supper, she either gets takeout, or barely eats anything at all.
She goes to the gym maybe 3 times a week. But she is quick to make excuses for reasons she can't go, and I don't personally think she pushes herself hard enough or long enough.
But telling her to eat less and work out more is not particularly useful. I know I wouldn't want someone giving me shit about that every day, so up until now, I've been very easy going and permissive with everything she does. I figure she doesn't need me on her back about it.
But now that she's not seeing any progress, and getting to the point where she wants to give up, I feel like I owe it to her to take a more active approach. I suggested using the MyFitnessPal app on her phone to track calories, but she insists it's a waste of time and she won't use it.
Does anyone have any advice? I'm not going to quit, and I'm afraid that if I continue losing weight while she stagnates, and it just make her feel worse.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by messing up a medical students exam.
POST: (was actually a few weeks ago, but i think Reddit will enjoy it all the same)
I was working as a pretend patient for my local hospital during the medical students exam period. The job its self is fairly easy and straight forward. As the patient, we are told which exam the students will be doing to us and we are told to answer specific questions and act in specific ways to try and make sure they all get the same information (if they ask for it!)
On this occasion I was assigned to the eye test station. All i had to do was read a few sentences off a card with one eye closed, let the student shine the light in my eye and pull some funny faces. (which im told tests facial nerves.)
As you can imagine through the course of 30 eye examinations, some of the students are going to make mistakes, and some are going to really fuck up, although as 3rd years i wasn't expecting too much to go wrong.
Some of the major mistakes included asking me to read text in a standard size 12 font from 5 meters away with one eye closed, which even saying it out loud should sound ridiculous! some students forgot to wash their hands and some forgot to check my name and date of birth.
About 20 tests in the next student comes in, a very nice, very polite and energetic girl and she starts the exam off very well. About 2 minutes in she is about to start the whole flash light in the eye section, so she picks up the supplied light and starts to press the top. It dosnt light up so she then tries twisting it; pushing it again, pressing the lens in, tapping it off the table and all sorts when there was a very obvious rubber button on the side of it.
At this point i lost it. I burst out in uncontrollable hysterics laughing at this poor girls misfortune. I was laughing so hard I could hardly breath and i suppose laughter is infectious as the student then also burst out in laughter! We (or rather I) proceed to unintentionally waste the remainder of the 6 minutes she had to complete the exam by trying to hold a straight face, which i failed horribly to do.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (29F) break it off with a fantastic woman (31F) or give it more time for feelings to develop?
POST: I can't tell if I'm jumping the gun, or my standards are too unrealistic, or if I'm going through some kind of rebound thing or what.
I have commitment issues and except for my last ex-girlfriend (2 years), I've never been able to keep up a relationship for more than a few months and I've always dated people who treat me kind of badly (ignore me or overstep my boundaries), maybe because I was physically abused as a child by my parents.
I met a lovely woman fresh off my breakup two months ago, and she checked all the boxes. Trustworthy, attractive, sweet, supportive, smart, driven, playful--everything I was looking for in a partner, she has. I was attracted to her from the start and we spend hours talking and laughing every time we met up. She's really really into me, and very open about it, no games, but still respectful of my boundaries. I liked her better than anyone else I was seeing at the time and wanted to focus on her, so we got exclusive recently. We've been spending a day out of every weekend together and I took her to botanical gardens at midnight, some romantic dates, etc.
I like her and I think she's gorgeous but I don't really feel anything for her, aside from respect and occasional fondness/attraction. I set up weekly dates and enjoy them but don't particularly feel giddy before or after. What are you supposed to feel at the beginning of a relationship? I was head-over-heels with my ex-girlfriend from the beginning, but my ex also had a quasi-emotional affair while making me feel like dirt she found on her shoe, so I don't know if me being head-over-heels is any kind of indicator of compatibility.
Should I break up with this wonderful woman now so I don't lead her on? Or should I give the relationship more of a chance to blossom? Do feelings grow over time or do you just know right off the bat when it's right and when it's not working? Or do I have a warped sense of what love is from having been abused as a child?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [23 M] of 4 years, found the love of my life too early...
POST: I hate to say it, but if I would have met this guy when I was 26, and fallen in love then, life would be stellar. This guy is exactly who I want to tackle life with, and have a family with. Here's the problem -- we met in our early teen's.
I met him in high school and I knew he was special. We started dating in the middle of college and now we're 23... I never knew I'd be in this weird position. I don't want to get married until my late 20's... can we make it until then?
He's the only person I've been romantic with and it's really taken a toll on me. That has to do with some societal pressures on me... telling me I should sleep with more people, but also it's hard to appreciate what I have when I haven't been put through the dating ringer. I could use some advice here, or how to gain some perspective. I could use some wisdom. Neither of us are the type to be okay with an open relationship, but when I have this urge to explore other things I don't know how to handle it. My biggest fear in life is that I end up alone. I don't want to lose this person.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I don't want my bf to have contact with this girl anymore...
POST: Writing this sounds absolutely ridiculous to me... because I'm not the jealous type, or the insecure type or anything.
(27/m) (23/f) 9 months.
But my boyfriend was the third in a polyamorous relationship for about 6 months before he and I were officially together. What I didn't know was that he was sleeping with her at the same time as he was sleeping with me for about 2 months. Now he doesn't see her.
He is still good friends with her (she just got engaged to her bf), and he was going to ask her about going to burning man with her, and it really bothered me... to the point where I want him to cut contact with her.
By cut contact, I don't mean de-friend or cut off all ties what so ever. But for the forseeable future, I don't want him interacting with her outside of casual fb chats.
I don't know what to do about this. Help?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24m] met [21f] And hit it off, After second date we decided to be friends, not sure if sincere
POST: So i met this girl and went on two dates, The first was just us walking around non stop talking, the second was a little awkard as we found out each of us have family issues and what not.
So a couple days after we talked briefly and agreed to be friends, however she was near crying and i feel lost about it as she was the one to suggest it. I don't have many friends and I really want to keep her as one.
Two days later I tried to start a converstion with her but she was only giving me one word answers, except for one which was only 5 words long.
As you can tell I feel very confused, lost and sad. I have no idea what to do or say to make things better between. When we went on the dates she was Very open about the fact she liked me and I feel i did the same. She obvisuly has a lot going on in her life and I sensed a little depression.
Please help Reddit!
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How is the best way to make a life changing decision?
POST: So, I need some advice. I'm going to try to best explain the situation- but be forewarned, I am eight months pregnant, and emotional, so rambling will probably happen. I apologize, and hope you can overlook that to help me with my problem.
A few months ago, I found out that my husband, father of my children, and best friend, of almost ten years has been cheating on me. Since then, I've been in limbo. I can't seem to make a decision. I've made lists, I've written an entire book on my feelings- but I change my mind daily. I'm terrified to make a definite decision. Most days, I pretend it never happened, and pretend I have this happy life with a loving husband- and, it makes me not want to leave. I argue with myself it was a one time mistake, and this is still the man I adore. Then, the next day he's late coming home from work, or wants to go out with friends, and I think he's still cheating and am fully prepared to leave him. Some days I still love him, but others I feel like I'm married to a stranger.
I am terrified to make a permanent decision, and when I think I do, I seem to change my mind and throw myself back into indecisiveness. I've tried making pros/cons list, I've written nearly two notebooks of my feelings, tried to 'go with the flow' and see how it turns out. I keep telling myself I'm putting off making a hasty decision, or an emotional one while pregnant.
I haven't told anyone (I'm not close with my family, and I've lost touch with nearly all my friends, not that I was that popular to begin with.) I've thought about therapy, but I'm not great at pouring my heart out (non-anonymously). As soon as I make a decision that I feel I'm sticking to, I change my mind and the merry go 'round continues. Yet, this is not the life I want to live. I don't want to live on the fence, one foot in- and one foot out. I feel like I'm lost, and it's making me feel like a crazy woman.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [19/f] with [19/m], after 2.5 years, our relationship is hitting its worst point and I need help.
POST: My boyfriend and I have been together for two and a half years, two of those years being long distance. To start with, I never wanted to do long distance. I told him this before we started dating, and I never really thought it would happen. Our relationship started out perfect; we had been best friends for 5 years before we started dating so we fit naturally. Being with him was amazing, and I knew I loved him after a short while.
We graduated high school, and when college came around we found out we didn't get into the same school. I was going to be 3 hours away and he had no car/no license. I promised him that I would give him a year of long distance, because I wanted to be with him so badly. Even though long distance messes me up emotionally, I felt like it was the right thing to do.
Two years later and he still isn't here. His first college semester he failed all of his classes, and couldn't get into the university. I told him I'd give him one more year as a last chance, but if he couldn't get in that I had to let him go. He doesn't call me when we're apart unless I ask him to, never wants to skype unless I bring it up...it's like when I'm gone he doesn't care as much.
But now, he's applied again, and we're waiting for a response. He wants to quit school if he doesn't get in. That way he can come be with me. He says that he will go back once I finish school, but I think this is a horrible idea. The other option he suggested is to move in with me over the summer, but I don't know that I would be able to let go after spending so many nights in the same bed and so many hours together. I cry all the time trying to figure out what to do, because I love him so much...he's the only one who knows everything about me. I just need some advice.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [19M] w/[18F] FWB, does she still hate me, or love me?
POST: Quite a bit of history here, but I'll try to be concise
Been messing around with a friend from high school for the last two summers, we have a really great time together and the sex is amazing, and I've fallen in love with her.
However, I broke her heart in high school really badly. She had a big crush on me for a while(so much so that the whole school knew) , and me and my ex gf at the time had just broken up, so I asked her to prom. After the prom, my ex gf wanted to get back together so I dropped this girl like she was hot. She told me she hated me after this and wouldn't speak to me for a year
When I came back from freshman year (she's a year younger) we saw each other and she told me she was over it, which is how we started up the current FWB relationship we have now. However, the feeling I'm getting from her isn't the same feeling as in high school. She seems more distant
Does she still think I'm a scumbag and is just using me for sex, or is she truly over it? I would like to get an outside opinion before I tell her my feelings because getting shut down would suck really bad.
Anything can help. Thanks in advance!
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Car stolen last night, what are some good outdoor security enhancements? Installing Street lights?
POST: So three young adults living together in a 1 story + basement home built in late 60s (metro Atlanta). We have determined that the car had to have been stolen in the middle of the night based upon events.
We have a motion sensing car port light that would have activated. But obviously didn't deter. We do have an indoor alarm system however no signs of damage or entry to house. No broken glass so they must have just popped the door and gotten away quick. We have two dogs sleeping in our rooms on opposite side of house. No one heard a thing.
Car was 94 Honda Accord w/o alarm.
We are trying to figure out how to better prepare ourselves for the next...event? Our neighbor had a break-in in the past six months with a sliding glass door. This is the first car theft. It's not a bad part or unsafe part of town - maybe complacency is the target?
Here is where I am so far and would like feedback on these + whatever else I'm missing.
1) We have no street lights on our street. I am having trouble finding out where to buy a quality LED street lamp which we can install on our power line pole in corner of yard (we have above ground wiring running to the house). Is this something I can install? Electrician? Equipment + install what kind of price am I looking at? We are thinking getting our immediate neighbors to help us with this initial cost as it will enhance safety to the whole street. Other thoughts?
Something like this?
2) We have a motion sensor on the car port but that obviously didn't deter the thief. What is a good outdoor camera with infrared. I'd prefer IP (wired POE or wireless). I'd like to setup motion grabbing photos via email during certain hours of the day/night...what software can do this?
3) Alarm - Check. We have had an alarm since we moved in. Will start arming at night.
4) Firearm - Check. Curious, if I had heard someone breaking into my car in the driveway could I have ran out and started firing at them (in GA and knowing that it wasn't a roommate)?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (26F) husband (28M) of 6 years depressed, alcoholic... At a loss.
POST: He's struggled with alcoholism for as long as I've known him. When he was working in sales and having people over all the time for "team building," I think it was easier to brush off as just a partying phase. But we've moved on and it hasn't gotten better. He doesn't go out all hours of the night like he used to, but he has to have a certain amount of booze every two days or he loses it.
I mean he gets DT's and nightmares and night sweats and anxiety. The depression, I thought, came and went... But I guess sometimes he's just better at hiding it. His anxiety keeps him from going out and socializing. He used to be very outgoing.
I'm at a loss. I've tried to get him to go to therapy forever. He finally went once, said it helped but won't go back because it's too expensive. We could afford it if he'd cut back on the alcohol and cigarettes...and I think the therapy could help him with that as well. I've tried getting a gym membership and dragging him with me because I've heard that endorphins help. He went twice and seemed to feel really good but I haven't been able to get him to go back.
I feel so lonely and I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave. I love this man. But I feel so alone. I want to help ease his pain and anxiety. I want to help him remember how sexy and charming and smart and fun he is. I feel like everything I do makes it worse or makes him feel like he needs to hide how he's feeling.
Has anyone ever been depressed in a relationship? Is there any way that the other person can help? What do I do?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, how should I respond to this
POST: Backstory:
My girlfriend and I have just moved into a new neighborhood, as of March 1st. We live in the basement of a 2 dwelling home, on a quiet street, not a main road or anything. My girlfriend drives a VW Jetta which we park on the street. We are the 3rd house from the corner, and the house directly beside us was just demolished, and they are building a new one. They have all their construction crap on the street in front of that house.
[Google Maps view of the houses](
The Problem:
Last night when my girlfriend came home, the area in front of our house was taken up by other vehicles, so she parked in the next closest available spot which was in front of the house on the corner. This morning when she got up to go to work, she found a note on the windshield that read:
>Dear Car Owner,
>
>We know you live in the neighborhood, but if you could please either
>park in front of your own house, or elsewhere that would be greatly
>appreciated as we have 2 young children that we have to load and
>unload. Your co operations is greatly appreciated
Normally I am a pretty polite and accommodating sort of person, but this just kind of rubbed me the wrong way. I am not out to pirate their spot, but I also don't feel I should have to park one and a half blocks away (probably in front of someone else's house) just because they want to park in this specific spot. They have the whole block of side street, room for at least 1 more car in front, and not to mention a 2 car garage in the alley.
While I understand that people generally like to park in front of their own houses, this is not always possible, as was the case with our own house last night. We live on a public street, and to my knowledge, there is no law or bylaw that gives anyone preferred access to any spots on a public street.
I would love to get some advice on how to respond to this person, and their ridiculous request.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My fiancee [28 F] knows better about Santa than I do
POST: I feel ridiculous that this is my relationship question, but here goes:
My girlfriend of 5 years has moved in with her 2 boys (9 and 6, fulltime) and my sons (12 and 8, 50% custody). She is normally very good to all the boys, very motherly and loving. Sometimes she can be overly blunt or emotional and let her anger get the best of her, but it's never manifested itself with my sons before.
A few weeks ago, near Xmas, she asked about the boys and Santa, saying they were too old to believe. I told her that I would appreciate if she would just keep her thoughts to herself about this when it came to my kids.
Anyway, last night out of the complete blue in the middle of some nice time with my son said something to the effect of, "You aren't one of those people that believes in Santa, are you?" I gave her a look and my son looked stunned. She continued with, "Wait a minute, you don't know your dad is Santa Claus?"
My son cried and has been crying all morning as well. My ex wife is PO'd. My fiancee has also been crying once she processed what she did and I don't think she had any idea how much she was crossing the line until I exploded when I had her alone.
I am so livid right now I am strongly considering breaking up this relationship. It's not really about Santa, it's about the basic lack of respect and the way she went about it. She has done this before with little things, but this is too much. My son is way too important to me to just forgive and forget this and I'm not sure how else to handle it.
Am I overreacting?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: A girl [16 F] likes me [17 M]. I can't like her because her ex is black and has a multitude of cringey characteristics, am I racist or in the wrong?
POST: Okay, so I recently took this girl to homecoming, she's a year younger than me and she told me that she liked me and wanted to start a relationship with me. I thought she was cute, and my only inhibition was that I still liked a long-time crush of mine. However now that it is clear that my long-term crush is not interested, I was considering dating this new girl, let's call her Jolie. Jolie told me the first time we got a little frisky was that her first time was with her ex. I didn't think anything of it at the time.
---
Recently she showed me the fb of her ex, let's call him jordan smith. His facebook is littered with shirtless selfies of him exposing his abs, he's black and he's very stereotypically one of those 'swag' type of guys. His fake middlename on fb is "cuddleswag" which is incredibly cringey. He works at "swagmasters inc". Judging by his fb statuses, he has the spelling and grammar levels of a third grader. I can't bring myself to like jolie because this guy was her ex. Jolie is completley different from him, she's more of a good-girl and I just can't see her having all of her first experiences with him. Am I wrong for doing so? This is also my first relationship so I feel like her having an ex like this, and telling me he was her first time devalues the sentimental value of my first times with her if I were to go that far. So am I in the wrong?
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SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: Ladies how would you deal with being in a "side piece" situation?
POST: A woman [22 F] I know is in a very complicated "side piece" situation. She was dating a man [26 M](whom she is in love with) for 2 years but recently stumbled onto his alternate instagram page. On this page she finds pictures of him with another woman [24 F] and a little child [4 F]. She contacted the other woman and long story short the other woman is his longtime girlfriend of 6 years and the little girl is their daughter.
When she confronted him with this information he used verbal judo and told her how he didn't need her and was going to break up with her anyways. So she ended up walking away from the encounter feeling horrible about herself
When I [24 M] talked to her about all of this she reasoned that she, "can't just walk away because true love is hard to find".
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by being too tired
POST: Obligatory this did not happen today but yesterday (it is 3:37am) and firsttimer :)
I went to bed around 4:30am and between that and getting up I remember my mom saying something about one of our cats having puked somewhere, since I could smell the stench I assumed it was in front of my door, at the top of the stairs where it had happened before. My only thoughts were about not wanting to clean up the mess and going back to sleep, since I am not required to attend school for the last few weeks until my finals. So my mom/family leave for school and work and I sleep till noon, adventually get up, have lunch, browse reddit on my phone while lying on my bed, study and play some GW2 (didn't get a Portal Item). In the evening my mom asks me if I have changed my blanket covers yet and tells me about how our cat had puked on my blanket and that she had scraped most of it of and had told me to change my covers before heading of to work. Seems I wasn't very conscious in the morning. I have no memory of my mother talking to me directly or even being in my room or the cat puking on my covers... I did notice the smell a little, when I woke up, but it smelled more like an aftersmell so I didn't go looking for cat puke.
I took a picture for proof, will be uploaded if demanded (it's not that great of a picture though)
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [21/F] think I have a crush on my professor [M] How do I stop him from realizing?
POST: I started a new writing class this semester that I love. It's interesting and I'm good at it and I'm pretty sure I'd like to pursue it as a career.
The problem is I seem to have developed a silly crush on my professor. Maybe it's just his Irish accent or how nice he is. Anyway, he's recognized that I'm good at the class and offers encouragement and talks about opportunities and career paths I could do well in. But I get flustered when he talks to me and have trouble making sentences and it's embarrassing. I joke around to my classmates that I love him but it seems to be becoming less of a joke for me. I want him to like me but just as a student I don't want a relationship or anything.
Anyway, I need some advice or tips on how to make it not-obvious that I have this weird crush-like thing until it blows over/I get over it. For example, subconscious things to look out for that I might not realize I'm doing.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (M/23) met a girl (F/18) online, we started talking a lot until it turned to sexting, the morning after she blocked me on everything and am a little confused as to why?
POST: So I know this is a little trivial and I should probably just drop it but I want to see if anyone has any explanation. So a few days ago I met a girl on tinder, hit it off instantly and started talking a ton, I eventually asked for her phone number, which she gave, with the intention of going out with her, but she lives a solid hour away and I'm unable to drive right now so we left it for now. She gives me here snapchat and Instagram and move in from there, she definitely isn't a dude fucking with me, friends match up across accounts etc. we start sending photos getting a little bit flirtier until she sends me a topless picture. That night we go into full on sexting mode, long stories, tons of pictures of her and what's she's doing etc etc.
The next morning I wake up and she's blocked me from snapchat, Instagram and Tinder and hasn't replied to a message I sent. No idea what could of caused the sudden change of heart, as I said all her accounts are legit so it's unlikely she's blackmailing me or anything. Any advice?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [19/f] My boyfriend's [20/m] ex [19/f] says she's in love with him (through text), and he doesn't want to tell her off
POST: My boyfriend's highschool girlfriend (dated ~3.5 years) dumped him as soon as they entered university because she didn't want to miss her chance to explore her sexuality and they agreed they'd try to be friends. I had already met him as we lived in the same residence building, and he developed a crush on me pretty soon after she had broken up with him, though we didn't start flirting until they'd been broken up a year. About a month into our relationship, she started drunk texting him about how much she still loved him and how she would dump her boyfriend for him at any moment as he was just a distraction to her. Once they broke up (I don't know why), she started texting him to try and start conversations, and at this point he decides to just not return her texts. About 6 months into our relationship (a month ago) she's texting him (and one of their mutual friends) about how she's always loved him and always will and how she feels offended that he's not returning her texts. He tells me he would have no interest in getting back together with her even if he was single because she treated him poorly throughout the relationship. My problem is that he hasn't asked her once (even politely) to stop texting him as he's afraid of confrontation. It makes me feel insecure because they were together for so much longer and they lost their virginity together (I lost mine to him). I fear that she may start confronting me personally or trying to break us up.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Found out I (25f) might be pregnant today, two hours after having huge fight with SO of two years (24m). Should I bring it up tonight, or wait for results and for things to calm?
POST: So.
We (25f, 24m, together 2 years) got in a huge fight this morning about future living arrangements, a problem that we let go unsolved for far too long, because we disagree, and we know it. Yelling match on the way to work, where I drop him off every morning. Normally I go to work right after, but on THIS day I scheduled my yearly physical (mandatory for work). I was generally fine with it, I haven't been feeling very well the past few days anyway, so I was excited to see if something was up.
I submitted my urine sample and she did all the normal physical stuff, left for a while, came back with "is there any possibility that you could be pregnant?" I told her that I was sexually active, so I suppose its always a possibility. She then did something she called a PG test, and then told me there was a WEIRD SECOND LINE and she would call it positive but wanted to get a blood test to be sure, results tomorrow. So here I sit, trying (unsuccessfully) not to think about it.
My boyfriend and I have discussed having a child, but neither of us want one right now. So, should I tell him tonight even though we said goodbye on a bad note this morning, or wait for the results and for things to calm down between us? I've been going back and forth on the issue constantly for hours now, getting nothing else done. Anyone have any advice?
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SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: Trouble losing vanity pounds
POST: Hi, /r/loseit,
I am a petite individual who is by no means overweight, but am unhappy with the weight I am at, and want to be my best self by losing the few extra pounds that can make a difference. I have two main problem areas - I am an apple shape, which leads to any extra weight collecting on the front of my stomach, making my it stick out and not be flat, which has been an area of self-consciousness for years, and I would like to create more of a thigh gap.
When I began my weight-loss efforts, I "easily" lost the first 8 lbs by going to the gym (running, body weight exercises, some dumbbell exercises) and counting calories - both of which I still do, yet I have completely stopped losing weight. For reference, I calculated that I should be eating 1600 calories a day to lose one pound a week, and this food amount generally fits well for me (though I never lose the one pound it promises). I would love advice on how to kick me out of this plateau and help me successfully shed the belly and thigh fat.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I[f/19] can't take my parents[m/43][f/42] fighting anymore
POST: They have always had really bad fights to the point where they almost got a divorce but then that moment made everything better. My mom cheated on my dad early in their relationship more than once but they prevailed from that. 20 years later, my dad is depressed and tells me he doesn't think my mother loves him anymore.
My mom formed a complex from her bouts of cheating and has always thought my dad will cheat on her.
It makes me not believe in any form of happiness in marriage. Like no way can I believe in it. Like even if I do get married to my current bf, we will only end up being unhappily married with kids and cheating. I can't even imagine making such a mistake. This all is making me afraid of love and making me think twice about it.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by being late to class because of breakfast
POST: I was eating at a local breakfast buffet and takeout before heading to class (I like to have a big breakfast because I skip lunch thanks to class), and after ordering, the waitress gives me a weird look and asks me if I can afford my meal. I was with my best friend, and she didn't ask him that. Now, he's as white as a ghost, and I'm as black as an Oreo cookie, so I definitely felt as though there were some racial undertones in what she was saying. The whole time my friend is telling me that I should stfu, take the food and go to class because I'd miss our exam. I wouldn't have any of it, ended up talking to the manager for almost half an hour. He somehow was upset at US at making a scene during busy hours, but also said he would talk to the waitress (he definitely won't). Ended up missing the exam and breakfast (as I refused to take the food). What a way to begin the day.
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