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int64 0
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600 | 601 | I heard that Being the one to circumcise elephants doesn't pay too well But the tips are huge!! | [-8.26909207e-03 5.98366037e-02 7.33268410e-02 6.76929504e-02
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601 | 602 | Why does BuzzFeed skip every other number when counting? They literally can't even. | [ 7.44059309e-02 -7.56981671e-02 3.18616219e-02 2.76019089e-02
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602 | 603 | A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on warfare. The librarian tells him he'll only lose it. | [-8.56101289e-02 7.80408680e-02 -1.32058961e-02 1.91085171e-02
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603 | 604 | I held up a fist for a CW to bump and she kissed my ring. I am now drunk on power and no one is allowed to make eye contact. | [-3.01019344e-02 -2.40265857e-03 1.76612269e-02 -5.34945773e-03
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604 | 605 | you knew the backstreet boys were actually friends because when the one boy asks if hes "sexual" the rest of the boys all agree that he is | [ 1.52171394e-02 -1.10548949e-02 -4.30051200e-02 5.72165661e-03
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605 | 606 | What's the difference between coriander and cumin? You can't coriander your pants. | [-7.20599070e-02 -3.74162160e-02 -2.17771661e-02 -1.85531396e-02
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606 | 607 | Sex makes your day, but anal makes you hole weak.. | [ 4.43530455e-02 -4.16744361e-03 1.45331994e-02 9.21750814e-02
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607 | 608 | A sadist and a masochist meet The masochist starts pleading, "Hit me! Please hit me!" The sadist looks at him, smiles, and calmly replies, "No." | [-4.76083606e-02 6.77038506e-02 -1.65210553e-02 6.43242002e-02
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608 | 609 | Got disoriented and walked into the wrong classroom. Didn't want to look stupid so I just went ahead and switched majors. | [ 5.61363213e-02 -6.33040909e-03 4.74323705e-02 3.25796939e-02
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609 | 610 | Libertarian Presidential Candidate's new Campaign, inspired by Bernie Sanders. "Feel the Johnson" | [-6.63619936e-02 -1.13381222e-01 2.19754875e-03 -6.47200446e-04
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610 | 611 | My wife urged me to be more experimental in the bedroom, but I guess she wasn't expecting I'd be dissecting so many white mice. | [-2.37467489e-03 -1.72304120e-02 9.22399610e-02 4.87474911e-02
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611 | 612 | What did Spock find in the Enterprise Bathroom? The Captain's Log. | [-1.09313885e-02 1.48542225e-02 1.74246989e-02 5.07119531e-03
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612 | 613 | PSA: If you've got an Islamic dog... Muslim | [-1.52494190e-02 7.47080818e-02 -2.39349529e-02 5.99560104e-02
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613 | 614 | How do you spot the blind man at the nudist beach? It's not hard | [ 3.97564396e-02 -3.95001192e-03 -2.40234789e-02 2.51529310e-02
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614 | 615 | What did Jay say when Adnan opened the trunk? Hae girl Hae | [-4.60258126e-02 7.36325234e-02 4.29969020e-02 5.05022891e-02
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615 | 616 | ME: Is this Babies R Us CASHIER: Yes ME: No babies work here C: I know ME: It should be called Babies Were US C: ... ME: Get me your manager | [-5.01944683e-02 6.02358542e-02 -2.07250305e-02 7.94755965e-02
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616 | 617 | A girl grabbed my cock and said, "Wow! Your dick wouldn't make a very good clock." "Why?" I asked, intrigued. "Because I'd struggle to get a second hand on it," she replied. | [-6.74562976e-02 3.70658785e-02 5.00804260e-02 8.55709091e-02
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617 | 618 | Broken pencils... ...are pointless. | [-8.70748162e-02 -1.18428711e-02 5.89033365e-02 8.46937206e-03
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618 | 619 | A man goes to the vet about his dog's fleas. The vet says: 'I'm sorry, I'll have to put this dog down.' The man is incredulous and asks why. The vet says: 'Because he's far too heavy.' | [-6.22882182e-03 6.35787249e-02 3.32117528e-02 5.58964871e-02
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619 | 620 | listen, officer - t h e o r e t i c a l l y - would I still get a carpool lane ticket if I have a body in the trunk | [-1.58830304e-02 4.23052348e-02 4.66039218e-02 -8.48022290e-03
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620 | 621 | An apple a day keeps my fruit-picking business trapped in bankruptcy. | [-4.62742243e-03 7.85042197e-02 7.36847222e-02 1.58095569e-03
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621 | 622 | What's a dinosaur's least favorite reindeer? Comet! =D | [-6.52692541e-02 4.31471393e-02 5.03002852e-02 2.07075030e-02
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622 | 623 | Why do seagulls live by the sea? If they lived by the bay they'd be bagels. | [ 2.76198704e-02 2.28498634e-02 5.04285954e-02 4.44634631e-02
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623 | 624 | When I lived on a houseboat I was seeing the girl next door, but eventually we drifted apart. | [ 1.11344168e-02 -3.21897827e-02 8.95129219e-02 7.16714337e-02
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624 | 625 | Donald Trump Does this count as putting the punchline in the title? | [ 2.32571270e-03 2.50124391e-02 5.93991503e-02 2.96843555e-02
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625 | 626 | My grandma got her bathroom redone with this sparkly gold-specked tile and she just called it her "golden shower" so goodnight. | [ 1.34910149e-02 1.42472154e-02 8.06024745e-02 2.30633207e-02
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626 | 627 | What happens when frogs park illegally? They get toad. | [ 3.79291959e-02 2.52916291e-02 5.41841052e-02 -6.87860921e-02
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627 | 628 | Shout out to my self-aware friends, you know who you are | [-1.36451237e-02 -8.78783036e-03 4.69633974e-02 1.03474120e-02
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628 | 629 | Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they could spend years at C. | [ 2.68461537e-02 3.89497988e-02 1.70262679e-02 -2.11867969e-02
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629 | 630 | There's a 100% chance the Republicans will discuss Starbucks cups in a debate tonight, so remember that when they ask how they lost in 2016. | [ 2.14534905e-02 -1.17149577e-02 1.75317563e-03 2.67886911e-02
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630 | 631 | A man purchases a kitten, which he's having trouble house breaking. What does his friend say when he comes to visit? Your house is quite the cat-ass-trophy. | [ 1.93118360e-02 1.04104087e-01 5.18579297e-02 5.53488685e-03
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631 | 632 | What do mutiny and an orgasm have in common? A sudden surge of seamen. | [ 1.06884670e-02 -1.93443671e-02 5.70093207e-02 5.65950982e-02
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632 | 633 | Why are normal human body temperatures around 98.7*F? Because we're all a little obtuse. | [ 7.86766335e-02 1.62039080e-03 2.76526064e-02 1.11618586e-01
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633 | 634 | Communism jokes are not funny Unless everyone gets them | [-2.62391847e-02 -3.19095477e-02 -4.91895005e-02 4.16295789e-02
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634 | 635 | There are two types of people in life... Those who think there are two types of people in life and the rest. | [ 2.58789361e-02 -4.23315056e-02 1.30792717e-02 4.60852161e-02
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635 | 636 | Dear Religion, Pics or it didn't happen. Love, Science | [-4.65441830e-02 1.37045830e-01 8.93054307e-02 1.15198806e-01
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636 | 637 | My best friend and I were comparing our penises... for who has the biggest. It ended in a tie. | [ 2.61272062e-02 6.94369599e-02 6.40489953e-03 -4.91302088e-02
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637 | 638 | If Trump wins, I'm leaving the country, if Clinton wins I'm leaving the country Not a political post, I just love to travel | [ 1.06498323e-01 -6.06223121e-02 5.46614155e-02 -3.82441543e-02
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638 | 639 | Why did the Storm Trooper decide to buy an Iphone? Because he couldn't find the Droid he was looking for. | [-7.17568696e-02 6.20088428e-02 1.44046754e-01 -2.68729273e-02
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639 | 640 | What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. | [-7.35134110e-02 1.57431178e-02 -6.16854616e-02 -6.33985996e-02
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640 | 641 | What's the hardest part about vaping? Telling your parents you're gay | [ 5.66609763e-02 5.57044446e-02 6.17407262e-02 8.54766229e-04
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641 | 642 | When I say I'm gonna take a nap, it means I'm gonna go on my computer for three hours. | [-3.61645818e-02 9.81668103e-03 -1.15705580e-02 1.96485836e-02
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642 | 643 | Ropin' and Ranchin' by Larry Yett | [-3.64465490e-02 -2.83881407e-02 -3.33830714e-02 7.24742748e-03
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643 | 644 | My brother told me this today. Malayasia flight 404 not found. | [ 3.08612045e-02 7.16440752e-02 -1.36355893e-03 -9.04401299e-03
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644 | 645 | I get turned on whenever I eat greek dips... ...I think I'm a hummusexual. | [-2.77364277e-03 -5.48127554e-02 3.82438265e-02 1.69917755e-02
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645 | 646 | What is Moby Dicks dad's name? Poppa Boner | [-1.16333276e-01 -1.25892563e-02 -6.27881661e-02 -5.47393672e-02
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646 | 647 | I love watching two girls meet each other. It's easily the most fake thing I have ever seen. | [-1.21450104e-01 -8.61732960e-02 3.68139893e-02 -3.90354656e-02
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647 | 648 | Pokemon Go has really improved my life... I used to always get in trouble for playing with my balls outside. | [ 5.12005165e-02 2.88553350e-02 1.14982136e-01 -1.78049449e-02
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648 | 649 | I showed up at Disney headquarters uninvited I said I was there for a Rogue One cameo That's how I learned the security guards have Tasers | [-1.11580826e-02 -4.36150134e-02 4.49017659e-02 3.76508269e-03
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649 | 650 | I like my women like I like my coffee... [Fill in the blank] | [-2.79080644e-02 -3.63043335e-04 5.92677779e-02 8.73858184e-02
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650 | 651 | Who does the Metric Cult worship? ...Demetre. | [-4.37394567e-02 1.57827698e-02 -2.59377360e-02 -5.52701354e-02
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651 | 652 | Why did the Canadian cross the road? Because that's the direction his car was sliding. | [ 9.25763231e-03 6.25367388e-02 3.78336906e-02 3.10391616e-02
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652 | 653 | What do you do when you find Michael J. Fox in your hot tub? .....Add your laundry. | [-2.26468593e-02 -1.83826629e-02 5.34138642e-02 2.95272823e-02
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653 | 654 | Describe yourself in one word Bad at describing myself with one word. | [ 6.48624822e-02 4.92656529e-02 -9.05352237e-04 7.67508894e-02
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654 | 655 | Opinions are like Assholes... Everyone has one, and some just taste better than others. | [ 2.33376212e-02 -7.31952265e-02 -2.94462014e-02 -1.94083806e-02
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655 | 656 | I don't always tell mom jokes But when i do, she laughs | [ 6.94264174e-02 -7.75716901e-02 -5.06351003e-03 3.30609852e-03
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656 | 657 | What do black men find most shocking about sex? Tazers | [-1.19684385e-02 4.18824628e-02 -5.04943505e-02 1.01975776e-01
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657 | 658 | Impotence: Nature's way of saying, "No hard feelings" | [-6.12331294e-02 1.37195028e-02 4.77511398e-02 1.14989392e-01
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658 | 659 | What do you call two gay Irishmen? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael | [-6.82981359e-03 -3.24335136e-02 -8.31894577e-02 -2.03556735e-02
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659 | 660 | Today I learned two things: 1. Build-A-Bear Workshop only lets you stuff fake animals 2. Mall security guards get to use real handcuffs | [-4.55058292e-02 5.42844124e-02 2.44761091e-02 6.21591993e-02
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660 | 661 | Why do elephants have 4 feet? Because in the animal kingdom 6 inches just wont do | [ 4.38457057e-02 6.54616579e-02 7.05772862e-02 2.65605166e-03
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661 | 662 | A blind guy walks into a bar... ...then a table, then a chair, then another chair... | [ 2.48838887e-02 -7.68996775e-02 -2.05158927e-02 2.53870059e-02
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662 | 663 | I bought a muzzle for my pet duck. Nothing flashy, but it fits the bill. | [-1.45415030e-02 -7.41807790e-03 3.42179425e-02 4.66702841e-02
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663 | 664 | There are plenty of fish in the sea. Sometimes you just need a really big fishing rod. | [ 2.31976546e-02 -2.82785986e-02 4.01873030e-02 -6.17902838e-02
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664 | 665 | Make sure you don't forget the 'R' when you're Googling, "movies of Gary Oldman." | [-1.17156550e-01 -5.77141903e-02 -7.20564798e-02 -6.21353723e-02
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665 | 666 | If I had a penny for every Donald Trump joke, I would have a small loan of one million dollars | [-1.60542503e-02 1.26526284e-03 3.33005786e-02 -6.21334044e-03
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666 | 667 | I like my steak like I like my women. White and domineering. | [ 1.52506083e-02 2.45203706e-03 -1.21952193e-02 8.00084323e-02
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667 | 668 | Retweet if you're naughty! Star if you love Jesus! Reply if you'd like to meet him! | [-1.07582800e-01 -1.77481156e-02 -1.88081595e-03 3.90993729e-02
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668 | 669 | Prostitutes hate trick-or-treaters. | [-2.90812124e-02 5.50537072e-02 8.62091780e-03 1.30122472e-02
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669 | 670 | Woke up this morning with a pillow over my face, hearing someone muttering "...it would be so easy..." | [-3.96505930e-02 4.06888127e-02 2.00476367e-02 4.17406224e-02
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670 | 671 | When are they going to drug test the audience of "The Price Is Right."? No one should be that happy. | [ 1.09930048e-02 5.87238967e-02 -3.29922102e-02 5.91551885e-04
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672 | 673 | How to get a Jewish girl's number? Roll up her sleeve... | [-1.43611310e-02 9.36352462e-02 3.25107761e-02 -4.79635894e-02
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673 | 674 | Why doesn't Hitler go ski? Cause he's blown his fucking head. | [ 7.06508160e-02 4.75499518e-02 2.78316028e-02 -1.34267444e-02
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674 | 675 | What's the best kind of grass? Emo grass; the grass that cuts itself. | [-1.84077825e-02 -4.92762635e-03 5.76010384e-02 -1.31746214e-02
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675 | 676 | Thought I could safely force a fart... But it backfired. | [ 6.03146292e-02 3.01885549e-02 -2.07847357e-02 6.61049858e-02
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676 | 677 | Why don't they have a WHITE history month?? Why don't they have NON-handicapped parking spaces? Why's there no cemetery for ALIVE people?? | [ 1.06134273e-01 7.58576840e-02 2.03312300e-02 2.84453128e-02
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677 | 678 | The Lord said unto John, "Come forth and be awarded eternal life" John came fifth and was awarded a toaster | [-6.09846152e-02 9.64055136e-02 6.31179884e-02 -1.80934388e-02
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678 | 679 | Why does Anna's mom encourage her daughter to experiment with sexuality? Because she lives bicuriously through others . | [ 5.35565391e-02 1.99419372e-02 2.27049720e-02 3.28052863e-02
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679 | 680 | Pretty busy at the gym this morning. I'm 6th in line for a selfie. | [-2.19679866e-02 -7.37551451e-02 6.57675266e-02 3.68658602e-02
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680 | 681 | *at a pizza buffet in the Midwest* Me: excuse me, can you please make a vegetarian pizza? Him: Sure! What kind of meat do you want on that? | [-5.95236942e-03 8.13593119e-02 3.85383470e-03 3.12310010e-02
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681 | 682 | Jokers of Reddit, any good blonde jokes or punch lines out there? | [-5.21290042e-02 -8.73516351e-02 -1.77680198e-02 5.88108040e-03
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682 | 683 | How many portuguese people can fit on a scooter? A Brazilian | [ 8.57925862e-02 -3.96541469e-02 -8.39153975e-02 2.44310703e-02
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683 | 684 | Now what's on the menu? Me-n-u | [-2.90177949e-02 6.36351109e-02 2.43685227e-02 -3.62248998e-03
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684 | 685 | What is it called when you are on the edge of WiFi signal range? Router Limits! | [-3.80387269e-02 -3.37072462e-02 -7.58125484e-02 2.26573809e-03
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685 | 686 | What is Jeb Bush's campaign slogan? Third time's the charm | [-2.47655716e-02 -1.98907983e-02 2.92922966e-02 -3.27732302e-02
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686 | 687 | Year 2142: Meat eaters have died out. Vegans survive. 2143: Everyone is dead b/c the vegans couldn't tell anyone else that they were vegan. | [-1.16683845e-03 -4.42063846e-02 2.32716799e-02 2.12388486e-02
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687 | 688 | My new years resolution is to have more sex! I Haven't told my cellmate yet though | [-2.23359093e-02 4.44148816e-02 9.11004916e-02 1.58936623e-02
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688 | 689 | Why do lawyer's suits never have pants pockets? Because their hands are always in someone else's! | [-5.43870255e-02 1.19586267e-01 -2.63187420e-02 -3.48511189e-02
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689 | 690 | Why does Helen Keller wear tight jeans? So people can read her lips. | [-5.59378676e-02 -2.52367649e-02 1.32970857e-02 1.04697004e-01
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690 | 691 | Go to racist joke, what's yours? Two unemployed Irishmen walk past a police notice board with "two black men wanted for rape" first one says "fucking niggers get all the best jobs" | [-6.79410994e-02 1.74723603e-02 -6.62668496e-02 5.44475913e-02
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691 | 692 | If you believe the home alarm commercials, the first thing burglars do when they break into your home is smash your family pictures. | [ 1.59752686e-02 1.33361332e-02 2.15072054e-02 -1.75309461e-02
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692 | 693 | What do you call a midget with no teeth A gum job. | [-5.74477389e-02 4.12427261e-02 -4.04174440e-02 -1.26405032e-02
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693 | 694 | It's just sad how often I see zookeepers breaking their own 'Dont Feed the Animals' rule. | [ 4.60162275e-02 1.59635525e-02 6.58628792e-02 7.04610953e-03
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694 | 695 | You really have to question the judgment of people who have children on purpose. | [ 1.19278636e-02 6.92729950e-02 -8.23034719e-02 4.05618772e-02
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695 | 696 | What's green and smells like bacon? Kermit the frog's finger | [-7.34968707e-02 -1.35807665e-02 4.22521606e-02 -2.24888902e-02
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696 | 697 | Why were there only 49 contestants in the National Ebonics Beauty Pageant? Nobody wanted to wear the sash that says "Idaho". | [ 7.85005689e-02 7.33604655e-02 4.05899473e-02 7.20073357e-02
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697 | 698 | What do you call a bald porcupine? Pointless. | [ 3.75172496e-02 3.51008661e-02 -2.71233711e-02 1.70097630e-02
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698 | 699 | Scientists remain baffled as to why the people on the internet really like pictures of cats and cats doing things. | [ 4.12172452e-02 1.60361137e-02 1.03361987e-01 5.44493198e-02
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699 | 700 | What do you do with old cannon balls ? Give them to elephants to use as marbles ! | [ 5.56487264e-03 1.33097157e-01 3.16437073e-02 -1.18484376e-02
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1.08786775e-02 -4.97931167e-02 -5.69497719e-02 -7.22032413e-02
3.28404643e-02 -2.20200401e-02 5.07114828e-02 -3.70871834e-02
-5.78944944e-03 2.85405573e-02 -1.52565930e-02 1.15257539e-01
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-2.11463217e-02 -1.25701934e-01 -4.69984002e-02 3.10595315e-02
5.70655428e-03 -1.24992486e-02 6.04919456e-02 1.58093963e-02
-6.66948929e-02 -1.07949469e-02 -3.59758735e-02 5.63711785e-02
-6.55021816e-02 7.09798336e-02 -2.88266223e-02 2.08447129e-02
-7.07679689e-02 7.78437480e-02 1.09020233e-01 6.03449382e-02
1.78982597e-02 5.47295585e-02 8.70196149e-02 2.71978937e-02
3.02575883e-02 8.23927149e-02 5.88714704e-02 -3.18955518e-02
-6.90244436e-02 2.92255450e-02 2.33009476e-02 5.31960540e-02
5.26946411e-02 2.00783368e-02 -1.42317526e-02 -2.11894345e-02
-7.76535794e-02 1.02579808e-02 -5.17769763e-03 -9.19506047e-03
1.25274152e-01 5.69566563e-02 9.58117247e-02 -2.07565396e-08
2.01055557e-02 9.55773294e-02 7.04721808e-02 -2.58196220e-02
-1.13142412e-02 5.54033462e-03 -4.07036878e-02 1.16065308e-01
2.34221760e-02 -1.13774143e-01 3.48568335e-02 3.42669636e-02
2.89670024e-02 7.92375281e-02 1.72114780e-03 6.25574887e-02
4.15304750e-02 -8.25341120e-02 -8.42633173e-02 4.00934927e-02
-3.26972604e-02 -8.82796478e-03 7.59626552e-02 3.46076414e-02
-8.59327167e-02 1.51696075e-02 2.29700133e-02 -4.32077534e-02
5.82064129e-03 -1.61276516e-02 -3.49593945e-02 -4.80749458e-02
-2.32760552e-02 1.72805600e-02 9.74289887e-03 1.33795738e-02
-2.55754255e-02 -2.69403104e-02 -1.59669481e-02 2.11983128e-03
-6.49301037e-02 -3.09756901e-02 -8.85005388e-03 -6.78805588e-03
1.30565874e-02 1.14866626e-02 -2.73681208e-02 -7.53528578e-03
-1.21843465e-01 9.20010060e-02 -6.46365061e-02 6.76800907e-02
-3.96094704e-03 -2.07544304e-02 3.31779830e-02 -1.05119329e-02
4.29950021e-02 4.13763151e-02 -4.76626083e-02 9.37560871e-02
4.62823845e-02 -5.06082401e-02 -2.82308608e-02 7.55312759e-03] |
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