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408,600 | > Mr_Tiggle\n\nಠ\_ಠ\n | {
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408,601 | This is a photo of 4 dudes who decided to get the same stick and poke tattoo of an open wallet with a moth flying out on their ass cheek. Pretty sure they're not 4 of the brightest, sober(est), dudes. | {
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408,602 | A *Justinfiable* reason.\n\n^^^^^get ^^^^^it? | {
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408,603 | Found Bradley Fletcher's reddit acc. | {
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408,604 | I agree as a girl whose husband called it quits six months in and let me know he had never loved me. | {
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408,605 | I fucking love zombie escape on CS:S | {
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408,606 | He could word the anonymous e-mail like "I am someone who likes you as a friend, so this secret is safe with me, and I'm sending you anonymously just so there's no awkwardness between us in real life which I know there could be otherwise, so just let it go after you decide what to do with the information and I will too now that I've sent it to you" | {
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408,607 | He's the richest man in the DC Universe. Why does he need to steal cake? | {
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408,608 | I know the people in the picture. I dont think the mother knows what reddit is, but i told her she'd made the front page. | {
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408,609 | Its probably just nonsexual and silly. | {
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408,610 | >it is a far more effective camouflage than standard uniform patterns\n\nHow do they test this? i'm thinking the only way would be to send soldiers into the woods and a team of snipers try to identify and count them.\n | {
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408,611 | Cost to find a new employee: $1000\n\nCost to "get rid of" old employee: $20,000 plus concrete\n\nCost to shut up witnesses: $20,00\n\nThe look on Ol' Jimmy's face when we finally got him to stop blaring country all day: Priceless | {
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408,612 | My Asian redheaded girlfriend who looks like Zooey Deschanel but also like Jewel Staite interrupted her Ph.D work in physics to agree with this, and then she made me a bacon sandwich and brought me a beer. Now she's patiently waiting for me to get off of Reddit so we can have a threesome with her hot friend who looks like the Snorg Tees girl. | {
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408,613 | As someone who worked on an IT hotline, please understand that I'm *forced* to go through the checklist, otherwise I might lose my job for "not following procedures".\n\nIt sucks and it's a waste of time, but it's not the agent's fault. If you wan to speed things up, don't fight the checklist, go through it as fast as you can, and then we can start working on your problem. | {
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408,614 | Lots of rocks in WoW, though. | {
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408,615 | You should have replied "Sho' nuff!" | {
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408,616 | They always come back. | {
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408,617 | That tip about the second servings... I feel like it's that way in ALL Asian countries :P The only way my husband got through meals on our vacation in the Philippines was by taking tiny portions all the time. | {
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408,618 | If she sees this post, you're totally getting laid, bro. | {
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408,619 | So instead of genderfluid, you're gendercondiment?\n\n^^I'll ^^just ^^follow ^^KlaymenWho ^^out... | {
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408,620 | I'm with you, reddit makes me hate the things I love. | {
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408,621 | Lucario has a magic series in Project M. As long as you hit the opponent or their shield, you can cancel one attack with another immediately if it is later in the series. The series goes jab -> tilt -> smash -> special. Aerial series is attack -> special. Lucario can also cancel the charging of aura sphere with shield buttons. | {
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408,622 | http://i.imgur.com/3eaXM.jpg | {
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408,623 | People have different ways of coping with a loss of a loved one. Some are more stranger than others. This man likes to fuck onions, who are you to judge? | {
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408,624 | Maybe he was just kicking air...and her face happen to be in the way. | {
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408,625 | I tried to reply to your previous one and the answer is the same: You're on Mars. You're doing science experiments, ON MARS.\n\nI don't understand where the confusion is as to why this would be a desirable mission. | {
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408,626 | Incidentally, any time anyone says uni I assume that they are abbreviating unicycle. It makes life more entertaining. | {
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408,627 | I feel really bad about laughing at this. | {
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408,628 | If a western country in general and the USA in particular sent troops into Libya, people everywhere would start screaming that they are only doing it for the oil. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. If the USA or Nato or anyone else goes in militarily, they will be criticized, but if they don't they will be criticized too. | {
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408,629 | we got lots of hardcore web design nerds on the reddits here\n\nnavigation and search upgrades on your site would be very welcome\n | {
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408,630 | I was actually thinking about how clever that was the other day! The rest of the movie is utter shit, but I thought that was the funniest way to come right out with it | {
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408,631 | **GYRO ENDURED MOISTURE** | {
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408,632 | Yep. Pretty much destroyed me. I ended up dying, being in the ICU for a week, and being in the state hospital for 8 months. I got out on my 18th birthday. I'm much happier these days though. She can die in fire full of AIDS and centipedes. | {
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408,633 | Yep, CTRL+N is new window, you press shift cause you are doing something shifty ;) | {
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408,634 | Similarly, I had a complete turnaround on Nick when [he was revealed as having a mistress. I think the line was "this is the part where you're supposed to start hating me" or something like that](/spoiler). What a phenomenal book. | {
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408,635 | and that was not it.. | {
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408,636 | God, I hate it when people just complain instead of trying to help or solve problems... something. | {
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408,637 | I don't like this dystopian future. | {
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408,638 | Or someone with a 300 pound man out of nowhere sitting on them. | {
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408,639 | Lets encircle him and then slowly attack one by one. That's sure to overpower him. | {
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408,640 | It's a copypasta, he didn't write it. | {
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408,641 | Girl: I... I have something to tell you...\n\n*[Guy is noticeably shaken]*\n\nGuy: What is it?\n\nGirl: I'm so so so sorry... I cheated on you...\n\nGuy: **BITCH, IT BETTER HAVE BEEN HOVERHANDS AND NOTHIN' ELSE!** | {
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408,642 | Would love to see all the supports in a match. There are 10 of them out of the tournament! | {
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408,643 | I'm pretty certain that if the world is ending and it's being broadcasted live on the internet, everyone would complain that the camera should be steadier and yell at the cameraman for doing a shit job. | {
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408,644 | And I'd really just start taking precautions and doing something about your son's behavior, because it really isn't looking very good. | {
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408,645 | Was his name Gaston, by any chance? | {
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408,646 | Numbers AND bullet points, oh you and your lack of concern for the norm. I like you. | {
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408,647 | As a long time Depp fan who is not a girl, i'd shit. | {
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408,648 | I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. | {
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408,649 | It is a shame www.derrit.com went down. It just copied reddit's front page but changed d and r letters around everywhere. \n\nEDIT: [Example](http://i.imgur.com/xjNDF.png). | {
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408,650 | You're right.. I'm sorry ): | {
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408,651 | This way I get to know the gist of the article, without having to read it, *AND* I still get to lord over my snarkiness all over the internet.\n\n*smug* | {
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408,652 | I seem to remember it having this glorious, long crescendo that lasted forever.. in the best way possible. | {
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408,653 | Do you really expect guys to offer to pay? Is that a thing? I never offer to pay, do guys think I'm an asshole for assuming they're financially independent? | {
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408,654 | I believe this is actually what his intentions were. The sales manager followed up on some of his phone calls and apparently 'Jim' would hang up the phone as soon as someone answered and then have an imaginary conversation to make it seem like he was working. Class act, that one. | {
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408,655 | Canada is like the Cosmo Kramer of the world. It's just kind of there and there's nothing you can do about it, it pops in every now and then and everyone loves it, but they're not quite sure why. | {
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408,656 | So he walks to a gas station to fill up a gas can to bring back to his **car** to fill it up.\n\nMakes perfect sense. | {
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408,657 | " in fact, because the pitch has a frustrating tendency to shed its small load at exactly the time no one's watching." \n\nSeriously, just get somebody with some experience in the porn filming industry to work the camera. I'm only interested in the moneyshot, not all this foreplay garbage. | {
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408,658 | yeah my youngest sister would sit in the family room naked pulling on her vagina. She was 4 i think. | {
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408,659 | **Welcome to the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen** | {
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408,660 | The Earth King has invited you to /r/LakeLaogai. | {
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408,661 | How would gorillas pass traits down to us? | {
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408,662 | Something something whiskey something. | {
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408,663 | I'm so sorry your name is Clayton... | {
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408,664 | I thought it was a medium sized dog but didn't have anything to tell the actual size of it. Figured the top half mummified and rear half was decomposed, only reason I could explain the odd tail. | {
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408,665 | Yeah id say Arizona having to go to a 3rd string QB is definitely luck.. | {
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408,666 | between pogs, labored breathing and the mcdonalds bag on the bed... its too close to home. | {
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408,667 | At least maintenance would be thankful. | {
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408,668 | Oh, sorry.\n+9990 reload speed\n\n\n+ has a 99.9% chance to shoot 9990 more bombs \n\n\n+ dealing damage with this weapon causes you to build up rage, rage \nincreases movement speed by 9990% \n\n\n+ 9990 more health\n | {
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408,669 | Better get as many reposts in as we can before that happens! | {
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408,670 | Oh my God, I honestly just laughed out loud.\n\nThat sounds harsh.\n\nIt'll happen for you mate. If you're a decent bloke then it will happen for you. If not, I'll pay for you to go to Amsterdam and have a crack on some high quality brasses. | {
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408,671 | My mom was a kid back in the day when the polio vaccination was being chanced from live to killed viruses. Grandma wanted to make sure she got the best vaccination so had her stuck with first one, then the other a year later.\n\n\nPeople who have seen an iron lung don't fuck around when it comes to vaccinations. | {
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408,672 | **I DON'T WANT HEALTH INSURANCE** *I want health care*\n\nAll i want is to:\n\nA) NOT die from some treatable illness and/or injury.\n\nB) NOT go completely bankrupt for having the audacity to want A. | {
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408,673 | I thought you were just gay. You're Canadian too? | {
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408,674 | That's the image for the "Burn Heal" item in Pokemon. | {
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408,675 | My Apple iPhone™ 3GS 16GB makes the official chime® sound when I get an email too! | {
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408,676 | This is why he's a better person and much more worthy of being lauded than Steve Jobs. Sorry to have to put it like that, but I just think this should be better understood by more people. | {
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408,677 | Well, to be fair, if you're Bill Gates, you can pretty much sit however the fuck you want. | {
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408,678 | Helps that it's a young white female face | {
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408,679 | I completely agree, this violates everything their agency stands for and they deserve to get fired. | {
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408,680 | Bollocks! I have been kicked in the ball and it was definetley over 9000 dels, *definetley*. | {
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408,681 | Sounds like a pretty mature, healthy attitude to me. I think you all may be reading in to things to much. | {
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408,682 | Most people when they are doing this at home get up and get a drink, a snack, take care of pets, or do something quick that needs done in the house everyone hour or two. If you're in an internet cafe you won't be getting up nearly as much.\n\nThat's why the people in here are saying they've had similar length or longer gaming sessions. They likely had them in their own home. | {
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408,683 | This is . . . this is *it*. | {
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408,684 | They also had a musical on this story. \n I hope the kid gets some retribution or... Something for being dicked over by a cop. | {
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408,685 | Bitch ain't fine is wut | {
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408,686 | Make with the Tim Allen stories, guy. | {
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408,687 | I sincerely hope they do. | {
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408,688 | I wouldn't mind taking her out to dinner and treating her in a respectful way. | {
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408,689 | I was just goofing around. The thought of a bunch of people trying unsuccessfully to log into my account tickles me. I didn't expect the episode to get best of'd.\n\nFor like two weeks I got daily private messages yelling at me for stealing my own username, and quite a few heroes volunteering to take over as the new JokeExplainer.\n\nReddit is a strange place sometimes. | {
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408,690 | Don't worry, you'll hit puberty eventually | {
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408,691 | Harry! I was just hanging out with Maryjane and you'll never believe what happened! | {
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408,692 | they're going to free the shit out of you | {
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408,693 | Or they're involved in a "grief-ier than thou" war to see who can be the most upset. | {
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408,694 | Was over quick and you cried afterwords? | {
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408,695 | And trundle got one...oh wait... | {
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408,696 | http://imgur.com/LyUxc | {
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408,697 | http://i.imgur.com/288NV.jpg | {
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408,698 | The hammer is my penis. | {
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408,699 | "Not to sound dickish" *looks at user name* ಠ\_ಠ\n | {
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