Datasets:

---

Nidhogg-zh

/

Multi-Questioner_Dialogue

like 3

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "When I was ten, I was playing in my backyard and sat on a blue jay. I mean, I tried to bring it back to life with electricity, but it just caught on fire. The worst part was it smelled delicious." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Uh, guys, I found an article here that says you can do CPR on birds." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Great. Do it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m not doing it. You killed him, you do it." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Anything?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I am tasting a lot of Slim Jim." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wait, wait, his wing moved." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hope you’re thirsty, here it comes." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Watch me." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s like going with your grandpa. Instead of eating popcorn, he brings little pieces of chicken in Tupperware and a thermos full of soup." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "He’s not that bad. Hey, Stuart, got any plans Thursday night?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "The carnal repartee, the erotic to and fro. But as delicious as the appetizer might be, at some point we will have to succumb and eat the entree while it’s still… hot." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m begging you, stop talking." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So roller skating, should we all grab a bite to eat first?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Good. P.F. Chang’s? My mom has coupons." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Great. Your mom’s not coming, right?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, do I mock you with the Bhagavad-Gita every time you scarf down a Whopper?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, what’s going on?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "And that’s where Darth Vader’s gonna pour soy sauce on your head." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sheldon, I don’t care if you get scalped tickets with us or not, but please don’t be creepy and go stalking this poor guy. You’re gonna get in trouble." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Lox and bagels, the breakfast of time travellers." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Terrific, does anyone want to buy my share of the time machine?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s the matter?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "This granola bar, there’s peanuts in it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh my God, why did you eat it?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know, it was just there." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well if I had a gun there, would you have shot yourself?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Don’t yell at me, I’ve got to go to the emergency room." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Now?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, after my tongue has swollen to the size of a brisket." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Alright, um, just, uh, let me get my keys." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Check it out. Look at the size of that Rice Krispie Treat. Same price." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, Howard, I need to tell you something." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I know, it’s not on my wedding diet. I don’t care." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Uh, listen, I heard that Bernadette’s thinking about asking you for a pre-nup." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "A pre-nup? Wow." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you gonna do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, you know the old saying, pasty and frail never fail." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Excuse me, but what about me? Why don’t I get a shot?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Fine, go ahead. Take a shot." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know, I’ve already got a gorgeous blonde back home at I can’t score with. I think I’ll let you two take this one." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Clearly, you’ve never been to my house for dinner on Rosh Hashanah." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We are not blackmailing Peter J… All right, where’s the ring?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Lobsters overnight?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, you’re kidding. Let me see. Well, I’ll be. Look, you can throw in a couple steaks and have a surf and turf." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "The surf and turf sounds good. See if they have corn on the cob." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "If I may proffer a suggestion, in bars all across this great nation of ours, Thursday night is Ladies’ Night. Which means, as the evening progresses, we will get better looking courtesy of 99 cent margaritas and two-for-one Jell-O shots." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, Howard, the odds of us picking up girls in a bar are practically zero." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Alright, where are these amazing shrimp?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Behold?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know how you put up with it. He’s impossible. I mean, holding a meeting to decide what breakfast cereal we should buy." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah. Cap’n Crunch with Crunch Berries, move on." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Anyway, Amy, thank you for sticking up for me." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "No good. I mean, it might work for the Japanese and the Americans, but have you seen the size of the Russians they got up there? This thing has to hold up against a hearty potato-based diet." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I feel terrible." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe if you were helping, you’d feel better about yourself." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I deliberately tried to sabotage Stuart’s date with Penny." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I’m not grilling you, I was just curious." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I still can’t get over the fact that she got a big movie part. Not that I care what my ex-girlfriend’s up to, ’cause I don’t." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s up?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "The Air Force contacted me about our quantum gyroscope. They want to have a meeting." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Is that Steve Wozniak?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I think it is." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yes, to be fair, do people who went to Princeton get a head start?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s not funny." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "That reminds me, I was thinking about wearing my NASA jumpsuit as a costume. But then I realized everyone would be, like, where’s your costume? Why are you wearing your work clothes, you nut?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hello, boys." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Six if you count Klingon." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Girls don’t count Klingon, Howard. Right?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "If you need liquid helium so bad, I know a guy who can get you some, if you don’t ask too many questions." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Who is he?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Guys, there was an accident at Bernie’s lab." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, my God, is she okay?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I’m serious, JPL’s actually developing a robot arm that could grab an asteroid before it hits us." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So their plan for saving the Earth from Armageddon is hoping a bunch of scientists can catch a ball?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, buddies. Guess who didn’t get security clearance to work on the giant space laser?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What happened?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You want to talk brave, how about Captain America’s undocumented Mexican gardener?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "He’s not braver than whoever uses the bathroom after The Thing?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I guess the sad truth is, not everyone will accomplish something great. Some of us may just have to find meaning in the little moments that make up life." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s a nice way of looking at it." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah for you, not for me. I went to space. I’m covered." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know what? This bottle was meant to celebrate an achievement. Let’s make a pact. When one of us gets their first big breakthrough, we’ll celebrate by opening this bottle of champagne and toasting Professor Abbott." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "This has to mean something." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, there’s no discernible pattern that I can see, but it shouldn’t be too hard to run the numbers and check." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, maybe we can get some time on the supercomputer." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Sure. We could try multiple regressions with varying physical and experimental constants." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, we could run a pattern-matching algorithm against well-known unsolved physics problems." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Wait a minute, Farminfarmian is speaking and you’re Bogarding the symposium." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, I’m sorry… we’re… we’re" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, no, you’re quark-blocking us." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know what to say." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Wow." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, listen…" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hi. We’re from the university. We’re trying to get some information about Professor Abbott." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "We were cleaning out his office and found these books full of numbers." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Any chance you know what it is?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay. On the count of three, I’ll shoot the fire extinguisher and get him airborne. Howard, you wave the blanket and guide him towards the exit. Raj, you hold open the curtain so he can fly out." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Are you sure a dummy like me can handle something as complicated as a blanket?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Do you want the fire extinguisher?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, I do." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Great. Here you go." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "The only thing we need to do is make this Kim kid lose his focus." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That won’t happen, he’s not interested in anything but physics." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "What about biology?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You know, biology? The one thing that can completely derail a world class mind." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, he’s fifteen." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’ll take a look at it." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Gentlemen, switching to local nerd news. Fishman, Chen, Chowdry, McNair aren’t fielding a team in the university physics bowl this year." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’re kidding, why not?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "How about the perpetual motion squad? It’s beyond the laws of physics, plus a little heads up for the ladies." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "The ladies?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I invented a game. You want to play?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sure." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "So who’d he get to be on his team." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "He won’t say. He just smiles, and eats macaroons out of his bat jar." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What the hell is that." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It looks like something they found on the ship at Roswell." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, think, Leslie." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "There are too many variables. It would take forever." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We’ve got to be missing something. Let’s start again. The movie is playing here at 7:20, here at 7:40, here at 8:10 and here at 8:45." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Some guy is auctioning off a miniature time machine prop from the original film and no-one is bidding on it." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "A time machine from the movie The Time Machine?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, a time machine from Sophie’s Choice." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay, I’m zeroing out the electro-osmotic flow rate in the micro-fluidic channel." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Nicely done, Howard." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, my wife is four-foot-ten and sexually satisfied, so clearly I know my way around tiny things." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Good for you, on the cutting edge of new technology and still making inappropriate comments about the mother of your child." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, Sheldon, turns out we didn’t need you after all." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "That’s right. We figured it out all by ourselves. Wasn’t even that hard." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, Sheldon. You can’t turn your back on physics, and besides, you have no idea what you’re doing with this stuff." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "But if you really want to learn the mechanical side, I can teach you anything you want to know." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And instead of standing around watching, you can help us build your smaller guidance system." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "If I’m gonna have any chance of raising this kid, I need to come up with a big idea to make some money." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "There’s no reason you can’t." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "That’s easy for you to say. You and Sheldon already came up with your superfluid helium model." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s just research. We’re never gonna make any money from it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey. In your supercooled helium experiments, did you create quantum vortices?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. Why?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, if you made a guidance system, couldn’t you use those vortices as a gyroscope?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wow. I’ve never thought about that." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "19th-century technology." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Does anybody know how to fix an internal combustion engine?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "This is cool. When was the last time you and I built something together?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Scientifically? A little over a year ago. LEGOs? Last week in my room." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "If there was a Nobel Prize for Millennium Falcons that fall apart when you pick them up, we’d be set." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "See what?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s a Stephen Hawking lecture from MIT in 1974." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "This is not a good time." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s before he became a creepy computer voice:." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s great, you guys have to go." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Believe me, I know. The e-mail I got was from the office of Stephen Hawking." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’re kidding." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "He’s coming to the university for a couple weeks to lecture, and he’s looking for an engineer to help maintain the equipment on his wheelchair." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s amazing. You’ll be like his pit crew. A word of caution, I would not do your Stephen Hawking impression in front of him." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Were you up making another stop-motion Lego movie?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "‘Cause let me tell you, it’s not enough to make the Legos move, they also have to capture your heart." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, I’ll give you one more clue. It involved another person." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Look, I was going over the schematics on my zero-G toilet, and I made a teeny tiny mistake on the specifications for the diverter valve." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How teeny tiny?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "We’ve actually been working on a prototype for a navigation system we invented." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "But we won’t bore you with the details." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, we’re using quantum vortices to replace gyroscopes in guidance systems." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s neat is that they can maintain angular momentum indefinitely." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, but we didn’t create it for weapons." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And I doubt the military would be interested in our little guidance system." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, in a couple of weeks, Stephen Hawking’s team is sending an expedition to the North Sea to test hydrodynamic simulations of black holes. One of their experimental physicists dropped out, and I recommended you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, do you really think I have a shot?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, I’ve worked with Hawking. I talked you up. He knows your research. I think this could happen." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "He knows, wow." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, look, it’s Doctor Stud!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Doctor what?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "The blogosphere is a-buzzing with news of you and Lesley Winkle making eine kleine bang-bang music." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wha… how did it get on the internet?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I put it there." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, how did you know about it?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "When they perfect human cloning I’m going to order twelve of those." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, can’t you see she’s using you?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know, Sheldon, those topical conferences on Bowes-Einstein condensates parties are legendary." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Forget the parties." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Forget the parties? What a nerd." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Are there any other honours I’ve gotten that I don’t know about? Did UPS drop off a Nobel Prize with my name on it?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "That’s kind of an overreaction to a little harmless necrophilia." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s not you, Howard, he says he’s moving out." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "What? No saws! One circumcision was enough." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How about an acetylene torch?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay, I can’t believe this needs to be said out loud. No pulling, no saws, no torches." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, then what do you want us to do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Exactly. I’ll bet there’s something around here that could be a lever." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Let’s see, a lever, a lever." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, no. I’m going out like this. (Whips off jacket to reveal tattoos up both arms)" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, what did you do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know. Have you watched the Olympics with me?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sheldon, can you believe that we’re driving in a van that was owned by one of the greatest scientific minds of the 20th century? It’s like the Batmobile. If Batman was real and a physicist and his car wasn’t cool." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We can’t afford to lose any more time." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, this probably won’t work, but has anyone ever tried to just haul off and whup the crazy out of him?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s not helpful. It’s fun to think about, but it’s not helpful. Hey, Sheldon, we are on a serious time crunch. We can’t do this without you. Can you please pull it together?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "The bad news is, he says he’s getting deported." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What do you mean, he’s getting deported?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, Bernadette got me a Fitbit so she can track how much I’m exercising." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’ll teach her to care about your health." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "But you know what wasn’t a party? That hotel in Kazakhstan they put you up in before the launch. I mean, it’s your last night on Earth. You’d think you’d get one porn channel." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Have you noticed that Howard can take any topic and use it to remind you that he went to space?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. Turns out, they guard the iPods, but they don’t guard the shirts." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "So, how’d it go?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It was going well. I was showing this super hot girl how to boot up in Safe Mode. The manager got suspicious, and, well, long story short, they really do have a little jail in the mall." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Just FYI, don’t try to go back with a fake moustache. I mean, they may not really be geniuses, but they see right through that." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I want to invoke the girlfriend pact, Howard." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s not a little scooter. It’s the second biggest Vespa they make! Are you watching football?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "There’s no fooling you. Now, what is this sacks statistic they put up there?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "All I know about Saks is, my mother shops there." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sacks, sacks…" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, you’re saying I don’t do anything around here. Look at my chore chart." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "She made him a chore chart." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Well, as it turns out, it’s also a Klingon word." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really? Define it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe he took a class at the adult bookstore. That’s how I learned." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I can’t believe you’ve never seen Raiders of the Lost Ark." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, hey, oh, we ran into your mom at Benihana last night." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, yeah, she loves that place. Every time they flip a shrimp in the air, she practically leaps out of her seat to catch it. That’s why I don’t take her to SeaWorld." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I know you-you don’t want to hear it, but she was there with Stuart." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, I hope they let us in soon. I’m tired of running to the gas station to use the bathroom. The guy makes me buy a Gatorade every time. It’s a vicious circle." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Too bad you don’t have a stadium pal like me." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s a stadium pal?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Better. Thanks." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Stars are pretty, aren’t they?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What’s so funny?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know what you’re talking about." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Psst! Psst!" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, Sheldon, it took me all morning, but I found the owner of the video store. And I am happy to report that he died peacefully in his sleep, drunk at the bottom of a pool. Anyway, there is no one to return the DVD to, so this issue is resolved. Ah! And I’d just like to point out that even though the sweater was uncomfortable, I didn’t use it as an excuse to antagonize everyone around me." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You know, you could reimburse the video store owner’s next of kin." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Or it’s resolved." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, just because you settled doesn’t mean I have to." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Excuse me, I’m sitting here." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s amazing people keep coming to comic book stores instead of just downloading comics digitally." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s probably for the best. For a lot of these guys, the weekly trip here is the only chance their mom has to go down to the basement and change their sheets." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I still keep thinking about how an entire life can seemingly amount to nothing." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I guess the sad truth is, not everyone will accomplish something great. Some of us may just have to find meaning in the little moments that make up life." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s a nice way of looking at it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, my dad used to have a pen like that. I dated it all through sixth grade." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It still feels weird just throwing away his work like this." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Don’t feel bad. Someday someone will be throwing out your work, too." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That someone was Sheldon, and the day was yesterday. Hey, look at this. Dear Roger, to be opened upon your first great discovery. Love, Mom. Wow, look at the date. He saved this fifty years and never got to open it." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Look at these notebooks. They’re full of pages and pages of data. He clearly spent years on this." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Mmm. It’s just columns of random numbers. Toss it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, but what if this was a potential breakthrough for him? What if, what if this is the thing that would’ve finally let him open that bottle of champagne?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You’re kidding. You’ve got lotions and bath oils and soaps, that’s the estrogen hat trick." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What it is is a cacophonous assault of eucalyptus, bayberry, cinnamon and vanilla. It’s as if my head were trapped in the pyjamas of a sultan." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Completely empty box. If you’d like to examine it?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Mm-hmm. Yep. I see nothing in this box but a wasted childhood." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You look like my little cousin when he’s dropping one in his diaper." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "She knows I have a girlfriend. It’s so weird." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It doesn’t mean any of that! It’s a typo." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know what? Let’s just get a pizza." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, I’m thinking of growing a mustache." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Ah, no kidding! A Fu Man Chu? A handlebar pencil?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, you’d think a guy like that would have some kind of booze lackey." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Alright this is cruel, we better let him finish before his head explodes." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Gentlemen, I believe I’ve found the solution to all our problems." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We can’t ask Leslie Winkle." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Good idea. Why don’t you get started on that?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, let’s just start walking. There’s got to be a gas station or something nearby." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know, he’s not really hurting anybody." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You didn’t have to scoop vomit out of your glove compartment." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Boy, he’s really gone, isn’t he?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, this morning he used a stick of butter as deodorant." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Here you go. Oh, you owe me another two dollars. The price of mu-shu pork went up." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s getting tougher and tougher to be a bad Jew." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Here you go, Penny. Shrimp with lobster sauce." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, maybe we shouldn’t have sunk to his level." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It wasn’t that bad." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Read it back one more time." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, you in on this?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No need. I’m breaking rules all the time." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Name one." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Although, I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t a little bit of a perk." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Who’s miserable and alone?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "At least it’s quiet when he takes bathroom breaks." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I know. That’s why I keep refilling his water when he’s not looking." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’re kidding." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t care if we’re in a drought, it’s worth it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know, I do have a way to get him out of our hair. I’ve been holding onto this for a few years, but maybe now’s the time." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "We can just lock the door, you don’t have to kill him." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You can’t kill him, he’ll just respawn at the last save point." } ]