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Except for us black folk | SchwuleMaedchen | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,205 | todayilearned | dfoir1q |
I like to think the less well endowed you are, the closer you like to get to a girl. | vanillathunder12 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,228 | todayilearned | dfoirja |
Our females are the fussiest | iDont_too | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,235 | todayilearned | dfoirp0 |
This 'dicks out for Hirambe' thing is getting out of hand | wiseguy541 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,247 | todayilearned | dfoirxo |
Well, some of us maybe | BenGJammin | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,277 | todayilearned | dfoisko |
Why else would it be horse cock, not gorilla cock? | Vladonald_Trumptin | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,291 | todayilearned | dfoiswi |
TIL: all primates will be REALLY tight | bigfatbino | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,477 | todayilearned | dfoiwpk |
So, next time I go to Six Flags I am gonna jump all over the cages, point, and laugh at the Monkeys just like they do to us haha | danfrom83 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,021,280 | todayilearned | dfojyo9 |
Baby... You can just call me King Kong. | CCTider | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,187,690 | todayilearned | dfr6eow |
there's a homo-erectus joke in here somewhere. | shelikesthecuck | 597 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,489 | todayilearned | dfnw3g7 |
This made me happy. | 2Young4MidlifeCrisis | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,712 | todayilearned | dfnwan3 |
I thought primates loved bananas | Wafflesaresotoys | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,942 | todayilearned | dfnwhyh |
Awwwww, yissss | pighalf | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,496 | todayilearned | dfnwzwc |
You win this round gorilla, but I'll get you next time. | I_are_facepalm | 303 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,973 | todayilearned | dfnxfpp |
Well, this explains why I saw a gorilla driving a Porsche the other day | IPeedOnTrumpAMA | 336 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,518 | todayilearned | dfnxxc7 |
So it's true what they say about them pumped up types | RugBurnDogDick | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,678 | todayilearned | dfny2cl |
Til I'm hung like a gorilla | safefart | 29 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,782 | todayilearned | dfny5he |
Look at this guy bragging about his 1+ inch penis over here. | majavic | 41 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,541 | todayilearned | dfnyszk |
human females simply have a preference for larger dongs, evolutionary selection for pleasure rather than survival. | AeroRandy | 27 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,890 | todayilearned | dfnz3nu |
Expand Dong | shoopdahoop22 | 8 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,859 | todayilearned | dfnzxfc |
except for OP, that is | bigchungy | -1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,993,964 | todayilearned | dfo0tup |
Those poor gorilla women | Davethemann | 4 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,994,084 | todayilearned | dfo0xfe |
Gorilla women must be tight. | wilslol | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,996,120 | todayilearned | dfo2k7z |
Oo that article brightened my day. | What-4 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,999,212 | todayilearned | dfo4xmh |
Suck it gorillas! | frostyfries | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,000,091 | todayilearned | dfo5lpf |
except for asians | ElGranBardock | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,001,716 | todayilearned | dfo6t28 |
TIL im a gorilla | icame4pron | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,002,744 | todayilearned | dfo7kdn |
Probably because if they ever got into a fight, that would be the first thing the opponent would go after | Parakeet34 | 6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,003,300 | todayilearned | dfo7zdz |
You hear that ladies? | Eab543 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,004,129 | todayilearned | dfo8lin |
You're damn right we are. | MegaMaim | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,004,411 | todayilearned | dfo8sqo |
So they bribed the politicians for nothing? | idrawheadphones | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,024,728 | technology | dfolsmd |
I think internet providers should not really sell customer browsing histories. | StaceyOh | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,025,325 | technology | dfom2r4 |
They will not sell, Just rent them | bobsmon | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,072,929 | technology | dfp99lv |
Was this ever much of a threat for consumers? | inoffensive1 | -6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,300 | technology | dfnwtml |
In other words... you best come at me with some serious greenage to make it worth my while. | ikhanic76 | 4 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,845 | technology | dfnzx00 |
Casey is pleased | Solar24 | 11 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,550 | nba | dfnw5et |
Fuck. | Cuporbust | 34 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,579 | nba | dfnw6cd |
Fuck ya | raptorsbucketnator | 8 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,607 | nba | dfnw78w |
LEAGUE FUCKED | Watchadoinfoo | 22 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,715 | nba | dfnwapd |
Still shooting in that empty arena | deadskin | 7 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,988,870 | nba | dfnwfoj |
I AM PLEASED | cyclingkingsley | 5 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,926 | nba | dfnxe6j |
Kinda glad that he was forced to rest this long. | Thimble | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,994,604 | nba | dfo1cv0 |
You sure that wasn't Alisyn Camerota? | Rabgix | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,011,914 | politics | dfoe396 |
timezones | ShellFlare | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,005,683 | Smite | dfo9oky |
Rick Rolls are eternal | D4NKBR3W | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,018,651 | Smite | dfoifd0 |
It is for me, 00:44 atm | BlacKnight132 | 14 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,996,639 | Smite | dfo2yoo |
Havin' a whinge are ya? | bot92a | -3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,041,488 | melbourne | dforr53 |
Meh, cars should be banned from that area anyway. | jamesroute78 | 9 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,003,297 | melbourne | dfo7zbp |
Ooooh I get it, it's the beards right? | vladval | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,238 | funny | dfnwrml |
Netflix has been watching your browser and noticed all those searches for "shaved" and "hairless". | Poemi | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,169 | funny | dfnxm5u |
I respectfully disagree. | Duhawk | 22 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,130 | CollegeBasketball | dfnyg7q |
I do not understand this type of humor | bounce_back | 12 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,785 | CollegeBasketball | dfnz0fr |
It'd be pretty funny to end a game on the wrong end of a 9-0 run to lose in the sweet 16 too | maxipad4 | 17 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,227 | CollegeBasketball | dfnzdxk |
I wonder if he failed his physical on purpose so he could go to another team, maybe he felt like the Dolphins weren't showing enough interest and support in him so he'd rather be released and get a fresh start somewhere else. | H00liGangGang | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,022,528 | miamidolphins | dfoknhb |
oh happy day | McLovin_2850 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,040,546 | miamidolphins | dforh14 |
Good fucking riddance. | SoFloMofo | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,056,083 | miamidolphins | dfoxs0o |
So I guess the Dion Jordan hype-train has derailed? | Hamm1126 | 13 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,733 | miamidolphins | dfnx7s1 |
What a disappointment... Good riddance... but hope he figures his shit out. | Iotatl | 4 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,752 | miamidolphins | dfnx8f7 |
Bye Felicia | thebuttpirater | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,973 | miamidolphins | dfnxfp7 |
Bye, Felecia | patdt13 | 6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,989,978 | miamidolphins | dfnxfvl |
This is a sad sigh of relief | concussed_cowboy | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,233 | miamidolphins | dfnxo93 |
The dream is dead :'( | HeritageCoach | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,251 | miamidolphins | dfnxotc |
Fucking finally. | doyouunderstandlife | 4 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,449 | miamidolphins | dfnxv3n |
Does this clear some cap? | illstealurcandy | 5 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,468 | miamidolphins | dfnxvpb |
About fucking time. | HadesNightOut | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,940 | miamidolphins | dfnyaem |
Good bye! | xcosmicwaffle69 | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,321 | miamidolphins | dfnzgud |
Finally we can move the fuck on that trade up to pick is hopefully the biggiest dolphins draft flop I'll ever witness | seanymartin | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,351 | miamidolphins | dfnzhrq |
Yeeeeeaaaahhh.......learned my lesson after purchasing a Yatil Green jersey.......YIKES! | geoliciouswerdsmith | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,392 | miamidolphins | dfnzj1i |
I want to use an Eternal Sunshine -like company to erase Dion Jordan from my memory. | SuitedPair | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,993,552 | miamidolphins | dfo0ihw |
Did you know that advertising and propaganda was long used by Hitler? | CEO_of_GamerGate | 6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,005,664 | KotakuInAction | dfo9o20 |
April fools? | CommanderZx2 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,006,307 | KotakuInAction | dfoa4zg |
LACTOSE METABOLIZING MASTERRACE. | nogodafterall | 7 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,006,545 | KotakuInAction | dfoab6v |
PETA belongs in the nut house, they've lost their fucking minds. | Templar_Knight08 | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,007,547 | KotakuInAction | dfob0xd |
yet there's a lact of evidence | Petrarch1603 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,015,392 | KotakuInAction | dfoggiq |
Is it cultural appropriation when I mix chocolate ice cream with milk and make myself a milkshake? | Sinborn | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,018,356 | KotakuInAction | dfoi8yx |
Hitler ate sugar. | MenaldiOsen | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,019,656 | KotakuInAction | dfoj0i9 |
We are all dumber for this. | FreeSpeechRocks | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,025,760 | KotakuInAction | dfom9zf |
Is this about the 1-2-Switch milking event? | creatureshock | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,026,582 | KotakuInAction | dfomn3j |
Did you know that peta drinks bleach? | AttackOfThe50Ft_Pede | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,044,606 | KotakuInAction | dfosoza |
Must explain my lactose intolerance. | Chronophasia | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,045,266 | KotakuInAction | dfoswdz |
PETA, young Earth creationists, flat Earthers... just ignore the crazies. | Drakaris | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,047,847 | KotakuInAction | dfotsjg |
It's PETA, they're fucking insane. | Anzereke | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,050,099 | KotakuInAction | dfoupo0 |
Drink a nice tall glass of pure racism. | drekstorm | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,083,350 | KotakuInAction | dfpg5k0 |
They also claimed that milk caused autism. | Laytonaster | 9 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,301 | KotakuInAction | dfnxqcz |
Holy cow, this article is *udderly* devastating! | ThatmodderGrim | 34 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,782 | KotakuInAction | dfny5go |
PETA's pretty late to the "every retard jump on this retarded thing" game. | Unplussed | 28 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,993,909 | KotakuInAction | dfo0sd3 |
Why is this posted on KIA? | sodiummuffin | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,993,989 | KotakuInAction | dfo0upl |
Did you know fried chicken was created by the KKK? | triggershoes | 20 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,995,604 | KotakuInAction | dfo25kb |
Didn't this whole 'Nazi milk pride' thing start out as some 4channers or something making a video *specifically* to elicit this sort of reaction from the gullible? | ValidAvailable | 94 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,996,406 | KotakuInAction | dfo2s54 |
And the fact they already hated people drinking milk... nah, that has nothing to do with it. | Zmanwarrior | 3 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,998,624 | KotakuInAction | dfo4hh7 |
Dear PETA, If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made out of meat? | Orgell_Evaan | 22 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,491,000,126 | KotakuInAction | dfo5mop |
Guaranteed he blows his brains out before 2017 is over. | PorkyMcDouche36 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,023,431 | politics | dfol55b |
Spicer does understand that Hilary didn't win the election right? | starienite | 2 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,028,471 | politics | dfonfu3 |
classic | throwawayswede123 | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-04 | 1,491,041,825 | politics | dforuuc |
Curious because I never had children: At what age do children typically figure out that adults aren't fooled by them? | Sussay | 284 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,990,110 | politics | dfnxk8g |
Buttery males strike again! | cavortingwebeasties | 6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,236 | politics | dfnyjhi |
Hillary and Obama potentially doing bad things doesn't magically make team Trump immune to criticism and suspicion. | miashaee | 29 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,991,721 | politics | dfnyyi0 |
Spicer is reposting. | DrScientist812 | 6 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,992,003 | politics | dfnz71p |
This was incredibly hard to watch. | Princess-PuTTY | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,993,724 | politics | dfo0n7x |
"I mean... this is what they gave me." | DamagedHells | 1 | -1 | -1 | 2017-03 | 1,490,994,516 | politics | dfo1a7s |
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