// SLANT

THWUGA: Good Old Fashioned Hate

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If this is your

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rst year on campus, welcome to the 2015 “To Hell With Georgia” issue, a very special edition of the

Tech- nique

. Contained in these pages are all manners of outlandish, (hopefully) entertaining and completely false material we as- pire to think up. Beginning as a modest four- page paper published on Nov. 17, 1911, the

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rst issue of the

Technique

focused primarily on the then-upcoming football game with Georgi a. It’s from this mo - ment “the South’s Liveliest Col- lege Newspaper” began. As a nod to this “modest” start, the sta

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of the

Technique

produces an annual issue dedi- cated to mocking Georgia’s newspaper,

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e Red and Black

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ough many of the jokes in this issue rely on the sordid tra- dition of low blows in the form of incest-, alcohol- and stupidity- related stereotypes that are not as true as they once were — Geor- gia students aren’t necessarily drunken rednecks nor are Tech students necessarily nerdy intro- verts — this issue is not about maintaining the prejudice.

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e most important aspect of this annual issue is the tradition: the traditions we repeat year af- ter year, the traditions that hold campus together and, of course, the tradition of “Good Old Fash- ioned Hate.” As you

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ip through these 28 pages, please keep in mind that this issue is all in good fun and is meant to make you proud to be a Yellow Jacket. Remember the Good Word (“To hell with georgia,” for those who have for- gotten), and what really binds all Tech students together: our Good Old-Fashioned Hate for our rivals up the road.

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Go dwags! Yo can anyone spare a fake id? I’m

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xin to head downtown Lehhgoooooo I’m not drunk enough yet Do we have a baseball team? Asking for a friend I didn’t come here to watch school, I came to watch football Anyone wanna kik ? hmu My pet chicken just got her feathers ru

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ed Luke Bryan is da man I looked up Athens and got some european city wtf?

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is is Ameri- can, it’s an American city same with rome and vienna. I don’t procrastinate. When I wait until the last minute, I’m older and wiser and can better handle the situation I have a boyfriend everyone knows that

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anigans is just a front.

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is may be an unpopular opinion, but I think diversity is important to have on campus Let the bodies hit the

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oor let the bodies hit the

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oor let the bodies hit the

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oor let the bodies hit the... FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRR

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ere are some trying times, I want to go downtown but I have work to do. Decisions de... nah downtown I’m a di

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erent person, turn my world around I honestly think ga tech needs to chill with the to hell with georgia stu

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. Like, I don’t hate y’ all and I don’t see why y’ all gotta hate on us. I feel kinda bad that they take out their stress on us I’m going on a hike this weekend, need to get out and experience nature for a while to destress I’ve seen people watching this new news channel Fallout 4! Why is everyone acting so normal? Danger is all around us! Turf management is a legit

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eld of expertise. Let’s see what your lawn looks like, huh?

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at’s what I thought Apparently bacon causes cancer now? Welp, I’ve lived a good life Love you guys, you know who you are Wait crap I misspelled dwags. Go dwags! r thoughts realli throughts?

F-150 cost now part of tuition

Midterm c ourse surver y calls for more barking in cla ss

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Following the second series of mid term examinations the Dwag student body was subjected to in late October, the administration has decided to introduce a new series of protocol for evaluating courses after a less than impres- sive series of test averages across the board.

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ese new course instructor surveys (CIS) are designed for students to give feedback to their professors on their teaching styles and the information that they would like to see more thoroughly covered in class. Just over 10 percent of the stu- dent body successfully participat- ed in the CIS, which is approxi- mately 10 percent more than was expected by the administration. Of that 10 percent, 100 percent of the participants were freshman.

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e results of the student feed- back pointed to some interesting suggestions regarding the content most students would like to have covered in their freshman classes. Over 75 percent of the stu- dents suggested that they would like time in class to work on the tradition of “Calling the Dwags.” Many students reported that at their

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rst semester football games, they felt inadequate in their per- formance of the battle cry. Stu- dents speci

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cally requested that in their physics classes, the pro- fessors derive a way for the am- plitude of their barks to be maxi- mized. Similarly, in linguistics classes, students have requested that the proper in

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ection tones of the barks in the “Calling of the Dwags” be analyzed. Another interesting result of the CIS found that over 40 per- cent of the open-ended responses showed an interest in being able to bring actual dogs to the Dwag walk performed ever y Saturday of a home game. Many of the fresh- man students have indicated that upon

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rst learning of the Dawg walk they were upset by the lack of dogs walking across the cam- pus in celebration of the upcom- ing game.

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e administration has found the results of the CIS to be help- ful in determining that freshmen students will no longer be eligible to complete the surveys in the up- coming term.

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After coming under

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re from students for what was described as “misleading advertising”, u[sic]ga dean of admissions Alec Stephens announced in a press conference yesterday that the school would including t he cost of a Ford F-1 50 in its cost of attendance estimates moving forward, apologizing for “failing to include such an essen- tial item” in previous iterations. “Honestly, I don’t know how it slipped my mind,” said a visibly

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ustered Stephens. “I’m used to seeing those trucks all over cam- pus. I guess I just assumed that everyone owned one.” Stephens went on to mention that owning a F-150 is “as important to the proud Bulldogs tradition as out- standing academics, top-notch athletics and more-or-less man- ageable levels of incest.”

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e reaction of students to Dean Stephen’s announcement was decidedly mixed. “

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is was, like, super important,” said Kyla Baisley, a second-year industrial couture and computer hygiene major. “Like, when I got accepted to u[sic]ga, it was, like, a lifelong dream. I just, like, thought that trucks would be part of room and board. And now, I mean, like, they will be! So we’re making change happen.” “Hashtag ‘real talk’,” said Erin Reid, who was standing nearby, a

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rst-year comtemporary weaving major. “I just hope they can do it without increasing the cost of room and board.”

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Route 78 near Athens came to a standstill when u[sic]ga student Ray Nathan “4-chainz” McGee suddenly swerved to avoid, what he reports, a stopped car on the road. According to polic e reports, McGee, who was driving a 1998 Ford F-150 partially cov- ered by mismatched camou-

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age stickers, made a quick stop, colliding to an adjacent 1999 Ford F-1 50, ful lly covered with camou

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age stickers. Upon further investigation, the police concluded that “4-chainz” had mistaken a stray autumn leaf on the road for a car.

POLICE R EPOR T!

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