Still worried about Obama's birth certificate? Mad about an unwise comment that was apologized for a week ago already? Need to complain about the fashion choices of the first lady? This is your contact. All nit-picking, questions unrelated to policy, and all old, tired, refuted lies will be handled by the new Adjunct Press Secretary, with skin as thick as a elephant and no aversion to calling people stupid (in the most delicate way, of course).

Free up Gibbs - let him just refer dumb questions from Faux "News" directly to the new Adjunct. Let Gibbs and Obama stick to dealing with policy. The Republicans left Obama with plenty to do, and now they seem intent on filling the airwaves with side issues and petty complaints, just to distract the Administration and Congress from the real work that needs to take place. Free them up again with this new position.

And I think pretty much any advice from former monster-in-residence Dick Cheney about how the country should be run now could be handled by the Adjunct Press Secretary, as well as most of what Karl Rove spews. Of course, as soon as your question is referred to this new office, everyone pretty much knows that the formal administration position about you and your question/issue/concern is that you are the real-life version of a website troll.

Update: Hey, first time on the recommended list! Thank you!