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I came up with this rough draft. I'm not sure if it fully answers the question. Any help would be great! I have come a long way since the beginning of my high school career. I started out as a shy kid, who basically just focused on his studies. Over the course of three or so years, I discovered some faith and courage in myself to finally break out of my shell. This allowed me to discover what I wanted out of life. I found my goals, my dreams. I began to set out and reach these goals. My determination to make a good future for myself grows more every day. I am not exactly sure what I am most talented at but I do know what I take most pride in; that is writing. In my opinion, going to the University of Hartford would allow me to excel greatly in my knowledge and understanding of English and writing. I would like to major in English at the University of Hartford and minor in video. I believe the University of Hartford will help me not only to find myself further but also the happiness I strive for in success. I am hoping to be to garner higher knowledge in writing through the University of Hartford's English program and be able to combine those ideas with what I learn in the film courses-to essentially find a career in writing for film andor television. I am not very strong in math or science; therefore, majoring in English and video, I would be able to learn in an area that I have a great passion for. I am done dreaming. I am ready to make my dreams happen. I believe the University of Hartford will allow me to do so. | I came up with this rough draft. I'm not sure if it fully answers the question. Any help would be great! I have come a long way since the beginning of my high school career. I started out as a shy kid, who basically just focused on his studies. Over the course of three or so years, I discovered some faith and courage in myself to finally break out of my shell. This allowed me to discover what I wanted out of life. I found my goals, my dreams. I began to set out and reach these goals. My determination to make a good future for myself grows more every day. I am not exactly sure what I am most talented at, but I do know what I take most pride in; that is writing. In my opinion, going to the University of Hartford would allow me to excel greatly in my knowledge and understanding of English and writing. I would like to major in English at the University of Hartford and minor in video. I believe the University of Hartford will help me not only to find myself further but also the happiness I strive for in success. Furthermore, I am hoping to be to garner higher knowledge in writing through the University of Hartford's English program and be able to combine those ideas with what I learn in the film courses-to essentially find a career in writing for film ardor television. Furthermore, I am not very strong in math or science; therefore, majoring in English and video, I would be able to learn in an area that I have a great passion for. Furthermore, I am done dreaming. Furthermore, I am ready to make my dreams happen. Furthermore, I believe the University of Hartford will allow me to do so. |
For the past year I have been holding down a part time job at Bj's Wholesale club. Not only that, I have worked hard enough to have myself the position of supervisor. The experiences of helping people with problems have made me a more caring person, better listener, and more personal speaker. Work has helped drive my motivation to succeed at school, giving me the confidence of leading a group of people and watching as a team can cooperate and work together. The university is located within close proximity to Bj's, and I will be able to continue my employment as both monetary and experiential aid to my education. Currently undecided in the major of business, I feel I would excel in that area as I have grown accustomed in managing people and have an interest in learning about the business world. Honestly I have developed a higher outlook on life and have been more serious so that I may prosper in my future. As a student of Montclair State University I hope to develop spiritually as an individual while I learn the principles of business. I feel MSU is perfect for | For the past year I have been holding down a part-time job at BJ's Wholesale club. Not only that, I have worked hard enough to have myself the position of supervisor. The experiences of helping people with problems have made me a more caring person, better listener, and more personal speaker. Work has helped drive my motivation to succeed at school, giving me the confidence of leading a group of people and watching as a team can cooperate and work together. The university is located close to BJ's, and I will be able to continue my employment as both monetary and experiential aid to my education. Currently, undecided in the major of business, I feel I would excel in that area as I have grown accustomed to managing people and have an interest in learning about the business world. Honestly I have developed a higher outlook on life and have been more serious so that I may prosper in my future. As a student of Montclair State University I hope to develop spiritually as an individual while I learn the principles of business. I feel MSU is perfect for |
Last year, I ended up getting straight A for my English 3 class. I was very proud of myself. I knew that all the educations I earned for the past few months never be wasted. From that point on, I started reading books and learned many new things. I love what I had learn and what I going to learn for my future. Being an independent student, I am very positive. I treat learning as fun activities not the job that I have to do. While getting education, compete with other students has become my hobbies and I always want to be a number one. I love to challenge people, and being challenged. That way I always have to push myself even more so that I can face with my new opponent. To become a successful person I believe that I always need to set my goal higher and higher. | Last year, I ended up getting straight A for my English 3 class. I was very proud of myself. I knew that all the educations I earned for the past few months never be wasted. From that point on, I started reading books and learned many new things. I love what I had learned and what I'm going to learn for my future. Being an independent student, I am very positive. I treat learning as fun activities not the job that I have to do. While getting education, compete with other students has become my hobbies and I always want to be a number one. I love to challenge people, and being challenged. That way I always have to push myself even more so that I can face with my new opponent. To become a successful person I believe that I always need to set my goal higher and higher. |
------ Topic: Evaluate a significant experience or achievement that has special meaning to you During the summer of 2008, sixteen Miami-Dade County Public School Students (MDCPS), including myself, were selected among the best Cisco Students in Miami-Dade to do an Internship at the Information Technology Services (ITS) Department of MDCPS. At ITS, we had the opportunity to see what working on the real world is and what it is to work in teams. In teams, we went to different schools across the county with different technicians, in order to install new equipment and make sure that all the schools were able to communicate among each other. We were simultaneously put into three groups, each including five people, and we had to develop -in theory- a new school site infrastructure. We had to decide on a location and explain the reasons for our choice, make the floor plans for the school, create the entire network infrastructure and buy the equipment with a limited amount of money. I was the team leader for one of the three groups. This experience was very important to me for several reasons including but not limited to learning business skills, having a real feeling of what a normal day at work is like, organizing and managing projects, dealing with different personalities and working with other people as a team and on my own as well. There are many ways this opportunity has impacted my life. After I concluded this internship, I've felt very confident when going into interviews. I'm also able to understand others better, which allows me to work with anyone and succeed. Furthermore, I realized that going to school is not a waste of time. When you go into the real world and see that you have the same -or even more- knowledge than the people in your own field, it is very rewarding. Now I'm able to be organized and keep up with my agenda everyday to keep track of all the assignments I have, and that is a very important step that has made me succeed after I completed the internship. I feel that the University of Miami (UM) can help me continue exploring the business world and prepare another leader not only for the business world, but for the Information Technology (IT) world as well. I could be a great asset to UM because I will not only learn, but I also share my knowledge about the business and the IT world with others. | ------ Topic: Evaluate a significant experience or achievement that has special meaning to you During the summer of 2008, sixteen Miami-Dade County Public School Students (MDCPS), including myself, were selected among the best Cisco Students in Miami-Dade to do an Internship at the Information Technology Services (ITS) Department of MDCPS. At ITS, we had the opportunity to see what working on the real world is and what it is to work in teams. In teams, we went to different schools across the county with different technicians, in order to install new equipment and make sure that all the schools were able to communicate among each other. We were simultaneously put into three groups, each including five people, and we had to develop -in theory- a new school site infrastructure. We had to decide on a location and explain the reasons for our choice, make the floor plans for the school, create the entire network infrastructure and buy the equipment with a limited amount of money. I was the team leader for one of the three groups. This experience was very important to me for several reasons including but not limited to learning business skills, having a real feeling of what a normal day at work is like, organizing and managing projects, dealing with different personalities and working with other people as a team and on my own as well. There are many ways this opportunity has impacted my life. After I concluded this internship, I've felt very confident when going into interviews. I'm also able to understand others better, which allows me to work with anyone and succeed. Furthermore, I realized that going to school is not a waste of time. When you go into the real world and see that you have the same -or even more-knowledge than the people in your own field, it is very rewarding. Now I'm able to be organized and keep up with my agenda every day to keep track of all the assignments I have, and that is a very important step that has made me succeed after I completed the internship. I feel that the University of Miami (UM) can help me continue exploring the business world and prepare another leader not only for the business world, but for the Information Technology (IT) world as well. I could be a great asset to UM because I will not only learn, but I also share my knowledge about the business and the IT world with others. |
Eleanor Roosevelt once said "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the things which you think you cannot do." On June 9, 2005 at the end of my eight grade School year, I found out that my mother had enrolled me an a Upward Bound Math, and Science Program for the upcoming summer, and not my twin brother. One might think that this isn't such a big deal but at that age my brother and I were very close to each other, and we did everything together. Now I had to go to this program where I didn't know anyone, and without my brother to back me up. During this phase of my life I was unsociable, very quiet, and my confidence to talk to someone new, was dismal. Meanwhile my brother was the total opposite, he was outgoing, very sociable, and supremely confident. I feel now that my confidence levels are strong but still getting stronger with every experience that I do and accomplish in my life. For instance numerous people considered I wouldn't be able to achieve an internship that Upward Bound Program was offering at the University of Miami Medical Campus, with all these negative predictions I started to think the same way. However I still tried and to my amazement I succeeded. The internship involved working with the I.T. crew and at the same time learning from them. With this accomplishment my confidence was given a major boost, it showed me that I could achieve and conquer any task given to me even if other people don't have confidence in me, to always have confidence in myself.. This meaningful event also helped me build and strengthen my courage. During the program I did many things that I wouldn't picture myself ever doing. The UB staff would take us on field trips; one of those trips was at John Pennykamp Coral reef State Park. During the trip we were put on a boat and taken to the middle of the Florida Keys where we were able to take the plunge inside, and snorkel with the numerous species of the sea including the treacherous Barracudas, Sharks, and Stingrays. Upward Bound also helped me to enhance my strengths by helping me to acknowledge my weaknesses. I never thought of myself as an academic oriented person but through the guidance of my mentors, and UB peers I discovered that my insecurities were hindering my innate intellectual entrance. Through their support my mentors and peers by showing me that education can be fun and introducing me to topics that I felt strongly about. Upward Bound helped me grasp the ideals represented in Roosevelt's quotation. Now I am a confident individual who will take advantage of every opportunity, I am an intellectual who will challenge himself academically and I hope to utilize these attributes in furthering the social and academic brilliance of the University of Florida. | Eleanor Roosevelt once said "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the things which you think you cannot do." On June 9, 2005, at the end of my eight grade School year, I found out that my mother had enrolled me an Upward Bound Math, and Science Program for the upcoming summer, and not my twin brother. One might think that this isn't such a big deal but at that age my brother and I were very close to each other, and we did everything together. Now I had to go to this program where I didn't know anyone, and without my brother to back me up. During this phase of my life I was unsociable, very quiet, and my confidence to talk to someone new, was dismal. Meanwhile, my brother was the total opposite, he was outgoing, very sociable, and supremely confident. I feel now that my confidence levels are strong but still getting stronger with every experience that I do and accomplish in my life. For instance numerous people considered I wouldn't be able to achieve an internship that Upward Bound Program was offering at the University of Miami Medical Campus, with all these negative predictions I started to think the same way. However, I still tried and to my amazement I succeeded. The internship involved working with the I.T. crew and at the same time learning from them. With this accomplishment my confidence was given a major boost, it showed me that I could achieve and conquer any task given to me even if other people don't have confidence in me, to always have confidence in myself. This meaningful event also helped me build and strengthen my courage. During the program I did many things that I wouldn't picture myself ever doing. The UP staff would take us on field trips; one of those trips was at John Pennykamp Coral reef State Park. During the trip we were put on a boat and taken to the middle of the Florida Keys where we were able to take the plunge inside, and snorkel with the numerous species of the sea including the treacherous Barracudas, Sharks, and Stingrays. Upward Bound also helped me to enhance my strengths by helping me to acknowledge my weaknesses. I never thought of myself as an academic oriented person but through the guidance of my mentors, and UP peers I discovered that my insecurities were hindering my innate intellectual entrance. Through their support my mentors and peers by showing me that education can be fun and introducing me to topics that I felt strongly about. Upward Bound helped me grasp the ideals represented in Roosevelt's quotation. Now I am a confident individual who will take advantage of every opportunity, I am an intellectual who will challenge himself academically, and I hope to utilize these attributes in furthering the social and academic brilliance of the University of Florida. |
"Congratulations! You are going to be a mother!" said the doctor, after the ultrasound. I was so terrified and at the same time overwhelmed of happiness. I said to myself is this real? Am I dreaming? It was real and I was certainly not dreaming. [..] | "Congratulations! You are going to be a mother!" said the doctor, after the ultrasound. I was so terrified and at the same time overwhelmed of happiness. I said to myself is this real? Am I dreaming? It was real and I was certainly not dreaming. [.] |
Throughout my life, I have often heard people say, "College was the best time of my life." I have always known that I want to experience the academic and social aspects that a university has to offer; however, I wasn't sure where I wanted to attend. I came across the University of Central Florida and I was immediately interested in everything it has to offer. The journalism program is just what I'm looking for because of the many opportunities and hands on experiences it presents. Next, the size of the university is beneficial because of the diversity; I will be able to meet people with different personalities, beliefs, and ethnic backgrounds. Another reason I chose UCF is because of the location. I like the energy and vibrancy of the Orlando community. The location also seems to present many job opportunities and internships for students. Finally, I spoke to a family friend who went to UCF; she spoke highly of the curriculum, professors, campus life, and sporting events. All in all, there are many reasons why I chose UCF. | Throughout my life, I have often heard people say, "College was the best time of my life." I have always known that I want to experience the academic and social aspects that a university has to offer; however, I wasn't sure where I wanted to attend. I came across the University of Central Florida, and I was immediately interested in everything it has to offer. The journalism program is just what I'm looking for because of the many opportunities and hands-on experiences it presents. Next, the size of the university is beneficial because of the diversity; I will be able to meet people with different personalities, beliefs, and ethnic backgrounds. Another reason I chose UCF is because of the location. I like the energy and vibrancy of the Orlando community. The location also seems to present many job opportunities and internships for students. Finally, I spoke to a family friend who went to UCF; she spoke highly of the curriculum, professors, campus life, and sporting events. All in all, there are many reasons why I chose UCF. |
Picking the right college to spend the remainder of my youthful days is no mean feat. Some people end up regretting their decisions for the rest of their lives, and a handful have already begun yearning for greener grass on the other side of the fence. Naturally, selecting one's second home for the next four years of one's life will be a momentous and life-altering decision and there is no room for any mistakes. Unlike many others who "fell in love with the impressive and distinctive architecture of their campuses", I must admit that my acquaintance with the Wharton School of Business is a result of many lazy Sunday evenings watching the popular reality television series "The Apprentice". An avid fan of the series, I was fascinated and inspired by the exhilarating lifestyle of business executives who were constantly being challenged by demanding circumstances and the exigencies of work. Meanwhile, I developed a great deal of respect for Donald Trump and read up on his background over the Internet, during which I learned about his alma mater, the University of Pennsylvania, and the top-notch education it provided. Subsequently, it subtly became my aspiration to be part of the community of the University of Pennsylvania. Having spent my life so far in a metropolitan city like Singapore, I long for a refreshing change in lifestyle. It would be great to pursue my tertiary education in a place with an extraordinary cultural milieu. As America's first university, UPenn has a rich heritage and possesses the perfect amalgamation of the classic and the contemporary. The small town feel of UPenn together with its location in a big city like Philadelphia would allow me to enjoy the best of both worlds. Another attractive aspect of UPenn is its multidisciplinary and flexible curriculum. Minimal restrictions on interdisciplinary programs, the array of art and science courses available, and the rigor with which they are conducted, appeals to my desire for an intellectually stimulating curriculum to familiarize me with the working world. As Singapore is a country with no other natural resources besides manpower, the Wharton curriculum will impart me the necessary skills to contribute to my country. A concentration in management will enable me to inspire and lead others around me in future while a concentration in real-estate will enable me to play a role in molding the urban environment in land-scarce Singapore. The vast options of extra curricular activities available have also left me spoiled for choice and I look forward to participating in a varsity sport along with dance. True to its spirit of diversity, UPenn admits the largest number of international students in the Ivy League. This would provide a conducive environment for cultural exchange and social networking. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent during international cyber-gaming competitions where there were many opportunities to interact with people from various backgrounds. Such instances have allowed me to appreciate the diversity of cultures in different parts of the world, and learn more about exquisite intricacies of life beyond Singapore's shores. Consequently, I am looking forward to sharing experiences with international students during my time there. Wharton also places a huge emphasis on the liberal-arts with its foreign language requirement policy. The French and Spanish languages have been of interest to me in recent times, and I am hoping to fulfill my linguistic pursuits in UPenn. Having acknowledged the importance of being conversant in several languages, mastery of the aforementioned languages, on top of English, Mandarin, Malay and Japanese which I am currently fluent in, will prove to be an asset in my future career. I also hope that I will be able to participate in the Wharton International Program, so that I can build a strong foundation for my linguistic skills and cultural understanding. UPenn also provides strong support for its students with its various initiatives and schemes. The Wharton's Lunch and Learn series offered for undergrads caught my eye when I was surfing the Wharton web-page. Throughout my education, I have believed in establishing close relationships with my teachers and I hope to continue bonding well with my professors during my tertiary education years. It is certainly easier to learn from someone I can communicate with as I would be less restrained from clarifying any of my doubts. In addition, my proactivity as a student will allow me to contribute to campus life. My experiences in teaching and tutoring will allow me to organize schemes to help other academically weak students who are unable to afford tuition services. I am also well-versed with competitive e-sports and can help to promote it on campus which will contribute to the development of a vibrant atmosphere and competitive environment in the university. Having lived up to its reputation as a place where opportunities are granted and dreams are fulfilled, the University of Pennsylvania is the lush patch of grass I deem greener than the rest. I early await my admission to UPenn, where I can discover and harness my potential, and look no further beyond any fence. I'm not sure if I am supposed to dive straight into answering the question or if I should give such an introduction about how I discovered Penn. I also did not elaborate too much on the courses which I intend to take so I am wondering if i have to add another paragraph. I'm more or less at the limit with almost 800 words so please tell me what I should omit if I were to include something else. thanks | Picking the right college to spend the remainder of my youthful days is no mean feat. Some people end up regretting their decisions for the rest of their lives, and a handful have already begun yearning for greener grass on the other side of the fence. Naturally, selecting one's second home for the next four years of one's life will be a momentous and life-altering decision and there is no room for any mistakes. Unlike many others who "fell in love with the impressive and distinctive architecture of their campuses", I must admit that my acquaintance with the Wharton School of Business is a result of many lazy Sunday evenings watching the popular reality television series "The Apprentice". An avid fan of the series, I was fascinated and inspired by the exhilarating lifestyle of business executives who were constantly being challenged by demanding circumstances and the exigencies of work. Meanwhile, I developed a great deal of respect for Donald Trump and read up on his background over the Internet, during which I learned about his alma mater, the University of Pennsylvania, and the top-notch education it provided. Subsequently, it subtly became my aspiration to be part of the community of the University of Pennsylvania. Having spent my life so far in a metropolitan city like Singapore, I long for a refreshing change in lifestyle. It would be great to pursue my tertiary education in a place with an extraordinary cultural milieu. As America's first university, Penn has a rich heritage and possesses the perfect amalgamation of the classic and the contemporary. The small town feel of Penn together with its location in a big city like Philadelphia would allow me to enjoy the best of both worlds. Another attractive aspect of Penn is its multidisciplinary and flexible curriculum. Minimal restrictions on interdisciplinary programs, the array of art and science courses available, and the rigor with which they are conducted, appeals to my desire for an intellectually stimulating curriculum to familiarize me with the working world. As Singapore is a country with no other natural resources besides manpower, the Wharton curriculum will impart me the necessary skills to contribute to my country. A concentration in management will enable me to inspire and lead others around me in future while a concentration in real-estate will enable me to play a role in molding the urban environment in land-scarce Singapore. The vast options of extracurricular activities available have also left me spoiled for choice and I look forward to participating in a varsity sport along with dance. True to its spirit of diversity, Penn admits the largest number of international students in the Ivy League. This would provide a conducive environment for cultural exchange and social networking. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent during international cyber-gaming competitions where there were many opportunities to interact with people from various backgrounds. Such instances have allowed me to appreciate the diversity of cultures in different parts of the world, and learn more about exquisite intricacies of life beyond Singapore's shores. Consequently, I am looking forward to sharing experiences with international students during my time there. Wharton also places a huge emphasis on the liberal-arts with its foreign language requirement policy. The French and Spanish languages have been of interest to me in recent times, and I am hoping to fulfill my linguistic pursuits in Penn. Having acknowledged the importance of being conversant in several languages, mastery of the aforementioned languages, on top of English, Mandarin, Malay and Japanese which I am currently fluent in, will prove to be an asset in my future career. I also hope that I will be able to participate in the Wharton International Program, so that I can build a strong foundation for my linguistic skills and cultural understanding. Penn also provides strong support for its students with its various initiatives and schemes. The Wharton's Lunch and Learn series offered for undergrads caught my eye when I was surfing the Wharton web-page. Throughout my education, I have believed in establishing close relationships with my teachers and I hope to continue bonding well with my professors during my tertiary education years. It is certainly easier to learn from someone I can communicate with as I would be less restrained from clarifying any of my doubts. In addition, my proactivity as a student will allow me to contribute to campus life. My experiences in teaching and tutoring will allow me to organize schemes to help other academically weak students who are unable to afford tuition services. I am also well-versed with competitive e-sports and can help to promote it on campus which will contribute to the development of a vibrant atmosphere and competitive environment in the university. Having lived up to its reputation as a place where opportunities are granted and dreams are fulfilled, the University of Pennsylvania is the lush patch of grass I deem greener than the rest. I early await my admission to Penn, where I can discover and harness my potential, and look no further beyond any fence. I'm not sure if I am supposed to dive straight into answering the question or if I should give such an introduction about how I discovered Penn. Furthermore, I also did not elaborate too much on the courses which I intend to take, so I am wondering if I have to add another paragraph. Furthermore, I'm more or less at the limit with almost 800 words, so please tell me what I should omit if I were to include something else. Thanks |
I would like to study marketing and business under Professor John Z. Zhang to benefit from his valuable insights. The rise of China as an economic superpower will provide numerous business opportunities for all and I feel that as a Singaporean Chinese, I would be well-suited to link China to the rest of the world. Zhang is well-versed with the workings of China's market and the decision-making processes of Chinese executives. His knowledge would be invaluable to my future endeavors in China's economic fraternity. As a maverick, Zhang questioned the traditional Western idea that price wars are detrimental to industries in "The Art of Price War". He also explained the prerequisites of an aggressive pricing strategy. In a world rife with unoriginality and plagiarism, the diversity of views he can offer me would be ideal. Zhang also proved that warfare is not irrelevant to business. Being very keen in military strategies myself, I look forward to engaging in stimulating discussions with him. about the last paragraph: this professor mentioned similarities between pricing strategies and Sun Tzu's Art of War in his article "The Art of Price War". As someone who is involved in playing competitive cyber-gaming (real time strategy games related to war), I wonder if this paragraph is appropriate. | I would like to study marketing and business under Professor John Z. Zhang to benefit from his valuable insights. The rise of China as an economic superpower will provide numerous business opportunities for all, and I feel that as a Singaporean Chinese, I would be well-suited to link China to the rest of the world. Zhang is well-versed with the workings of China's market and the decision-making processes of Chinese executives. His knowledge would be invaluable to my future endeavors in China's economic fraternity. As a maverick, Zhang questioned the traditional Western idea that price wars are detrimental to industries in "The Art of Price War". He also explained the prerequisites of an aggressive pricing strategy. In a world rife with originality and plagiarism, the diversity of views he can offer me would be ideal. Zhang also proved that warfare is not irrelevant to business. Being very keen in military strategies myself, I look forward to engaging in stimulating discussions with him. About the last paragraph: this professor mentioned similarities between pricing strategies and Sun Tau's Art of War in his article "The Art of Price War". As someone who is involved in playing competitive cyber-gaming (real time strategy games related to war), I wonder if this paragraph is appropriate. |
Please , i need some advices about what is wrong with my essay, grammar,structure, etc. what needs to be corrected? thanks There are obstacles in my academic, and personal life that make it hard for me to be a successful person. I have to fight with my own insecurities. I have to overcome issues with my health. I have to confront social discrimination. But, life goes on, and those 'bumps' are just part of life. I'm still learning how to deal with them as I get more mature. I know what I have to do, when, and how. I guess is call "building self-confidence". To fight my own insecurities is the hardest test in life. I constantly change my mind about what is the right thing to do, or what is the best decision to make, or when is the right time to do it. To quit my current job is one of those hard decisions that I have to consider every day. I'm not sure if will be able to find a better job in today's day. The rate of unemployment is so high, and the economical crisis don't help at all. Buying a house was another hard decision I had to made a couple of years ago, because I was afraid of not being able to keep up with the mortgage. Unfortunately, I'm loosing my house but not because I made the wrong decision, but because of the economical crisis going on. I get some relief about it. To Improve my health is another challenge in my life. In the last year or so my health has gone really bad. I've been diagnosed with migraines, hypertension, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, chronic sinus, anxiety, and allergies to all type of weeds and dust. I'm working hard to improve my quality of life. I had to drastically change my eating habits. I had to quit drinking and smoking cigars too. In addition, I must take a cocktail of pills every morning to get cure. I accept that to go back to school won't be either an easy task for me, specially with the migraines I get every day. Headaches make it hard for me to concentrate and to study. But, I keep a positive attitude and I'm confident that against all odds I will get better. Social discrimination it's an issue that I face as an immigrant everyday. Every where I go I have to deal with people over looking at me and my family when we choose to speak Spanish in public places. I also must recognize that to be bilingual gives me the chance to find more job opportunities, however , to speak with certain accent in this country is yet not acceptable by other Americans. For example, I work in a call center and I've noticed that some customer won't talk to me when they notice my accent, or when they hear my last name. Some customers are even more aggressive and hang up to call back hoping to speak the next time with someone else. It doesn't bother me anymore. Finally I got to the conclusion that obstacles in life are there just to make you the best in what you do. After all the final decision to be successful is within oneself. | Please, I need some advices about what is wrong with my essay, grammar, structure, etc. what needs to be corrected? Thanks There are obstacles in my academic, and personal life that make it hard for me to be a successful person. I have to fight with my own insecurities. I have to overcome issues with my health. Furthermore, I have to confront social discrimination. But, life goes on, and those 'bumps' are just part of life. I'm still learning how to deal with them as I get more mature. I know what I have to do, when, and how. Furthermore, I guess is call "building self-confidence". To fight my own insecurities is the hardest test in life. I constantly change my mind about what is the right thing to do, or what is the best decision to make, or when is the right time to do it. To quit my current job is one of those hard decisions that I have to consider every day. I'm not sure if you will be able to find a better job in today's day. The rate of unemployment is so high, and the economic crisis don't help at all. Buying a house was another hard decision I had to make a couple of years ago, because I was afraid of not being able to keep up with the mortgage. Unfortunately, I'm loosing my house but not because I made the wrong decision, but because of the economic crisis going on. I get some relief about it. To Improve my health is another challenge in my life. In the last year or so my health has gone awful. I've been diagnosed with migraines, hypertension, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, chronic sinus, anxiety, and allergies to all type of weeds and dust. I'm working hard to improve my quality of life. Furthermore, I had to drastically change my eating habits. Furthermore, I had to quit drinking and smoking cigars too. In addition, I must take a cocktail of pills every morning to get cure. I accept that to go back to school won't be either an easy task for me, specially with the migraines I get every day. Headaches make it hard for me to concentrate and to study. But, I keep a positive attitude, and I'm confident that against all odds I will get better. Social discrimination it's an issue that I face as an immigrant every day. Everywhere I go I have to deal with people overlooking at me and my family when we choose to speak Spanish in public places. I also must recognize that to be bilingual gives me the chance to find more job opportunities, however, to speak with certain accent in this country is yet not acceptable by other Americans. For example, I work in a call center, and I've noticed that some customer won't talk to me when they notice my accent, or when they hear my last name. Some customers are even more aggressive and hang up to call back hoping to speak the next time with someone else. It doesn't bother me anymore. Finally, I got to the conclusion that obstacles in life are there just to make you the best in what you do. After all the final decision to be successful is within oneself. |
Hard to believe in the morning, with the big black rope on, I rode with flying broomstick--Nimbus 2000, and appeared in front of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I hastily passed all the corridors, rushed into classroom and finally settled down next to Ron and Hermione. Defense against the Dark Arts Class with Professor Lupin was exciting but thrilling, not because of all those dark creatures, but Professor Lupin-a werewolf, who would become a wolf every full moon. I was scared a few weeks before the truth came out clearly: a kind-hearted man had not only become a werewolf accidentally but not been trust or socially accepted as well. Seriously, have we taken their feelings into account when we put the alert eyes and acts to those unfortunate people? Just like Prongs' and Professor Dumbledore's understanding and assistance, my amity may be important to Professor Lupin. Therefore, I courageously walked up to him right after class. While holding his hands, I told him, "Professor Lupin, I will be your friend." Soon after lunch, I involved in the Quidditch Game against Slytherin. I flew in the air and enjoyed the feeling of tremble. Suddenly, the Golden Snitch came across overhead; my super fast speed even made my hair stood up in the wind. Gryffindor broke out a roar of cheering because I just about to catch the ball. But I was down at the site one second later hit by a Bludger. Valorous enough to continue the game, I got up on my broom again and chased right after the Golden Snitch. Eventually, as I had expected, Gryffindor won. Quiet at night, I watched outside windows, wondering when was the darkness of evil Voldemort going to get back...As I snap back into reality, I take my time to savor my day as Harry Potter. I would like to choose Harry if I get to spend a day as a fictional character. Not only has wisdom and courage to the backbone in all those violent and dirty situation, but Harry do accept, trust and help others. What's virtuous about him is that he always has a kindly and pure heart. In addition, just like words in the movie "A Cinderella Story"-never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game, Harry Potter is always provided with perseverant volition no matter what kind of difficulties he is facing. He is both the hero and the model in my heart. | Hard to believe in the morning, with the big black rope on, I rode with flying broomstick--Nimbus 2000, and appeared in front of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I hastily passed all the corridors, rushed into classroom and finally settled down next to Ron and Hermione. Defense against the Dark Arts Class with Professor Lupin was exciting but thrilling, not because of all those dark creatures, but Professor Lupin-a werewolf, who would become a wolf every full moon. I was scared a few weeks before the truth came out clearly: a kind-hearted man had not only become a werewolf accidentally but not been trust or socially accepted as well. Seriously, have we taken their feelings into account when we put the alert eyes and acts to those unfortunate people? Just like Prongs' and Professor Dumbledore's understanding and assistance, my amity may be important to Professor Lupin. Therefore, I courageously walked up to him right after class. While holding his hands, I told him, "Professor Lupin, I will be your friend." Soon after lunch, I involved in the Quidditch Game against Slytherin. I flew in the air and enjoyed the feeling of tremble. Suddenly, the Golden Snitch came across overhead; my superfast speed even made my hair stood up in the wind. Gryffindor broke out a roar of cheering because I just about to catch the ball. But I was down at the site one second later hit by a Budget. Valorous enough to continue the game, I got up on my broom again and chased right after the Golden Snitch. Eventually, as I had expected, Gryffindor won. Quiet at night, I watched outside windows, wondering when was the darkness of evil Voldemort going to get back... As I snap back into reality, I take my time to savor my day as Harry Potter. I would like to choose Harry if I get to spend a day as a fictional character. Not only has wisdom and courage to the backbone in all those violent and dirty situation, but Harry do accept, trust and help others. What's virtuous about him is that he always has a kindly and pure heart. In addition, just like words in the movie "A Cinderella Story"-never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game, Harry Potter is always provided with perseverant volition no matter what kind of difficulties he is facing. He is both the hero and the model in my heart. |
How I encompass Vires can be explained looking back at my sophomore year. In 2006 I had a terrible football injury. It was the Bartram vs. Orange Park game where I felt a sharp pain in my lower back after tackling a running back. After a year of physical therapy and wearing a embarrassing and bulky back brace, I also heard the worst news of my life. "You will never play football again Blake. If you ever play any contact sport there's a very good chance you could paralyze yourself." I felt my hopes and dreams start to slip away. Besides weight lifting, football was my life! So, how did I recover physically, emotionally, and morally? How do I exemplify this word, "vires?" I realized that I had much to be thankful for. I needed to work through the anger and resentment. It took strength to recognize that dreams are endless and when one departs another arrives. By putting forth maximum effort in everything that means something to me, I may be confidently described by the Latin word "artes". I give one hundred percent of my heart and loyalty to my family and friends. My effort towards my education is very important to me. Throughout High School I chose to challenge and push myself by enrolling in honors and advanced placement courses. When a new concept is introduced to me, I pick up very quickly, and then like to teach my new learned skills to my friends and classmates. At work I have earned the confidence and trust of my boss. Hard work and perseverance brings success and self appreciation. The word "mores" is also a reflection in my life. I am very aware and appreciative of the talents and opportunities that have presented themselves to me. I have learned to accept the obstacles that are place in front of me and appreciate life for what it has given me. I believe strongly in treating people as I like to be treated. FSU deserves students strong in character and tradition and I am a direct reflection of this value. Florida State University presents me with the best opportunity to further develop the traits within myself that embody the spirit of the school; "vires, artes, mores." If selected to be a part of FSU, I would continue the tradition of bringing such values of character and strength this institution. | How I encompass Virus can be explained looking back at my sophomore year. In 2006, I had a terrible football injury. It was the Bertram vs. Orange Park game where I felt a sharp pain in my lower back after tackling a running back. After a year of physical therapy and wearing an embarrassing and bulky back brace, I also heard the worst news of my life. "You will never play football again Blake. If you ever play any contact sport there's a very good chance you could paralyze yourself." I felt my hopes and dreams start to slip away. Besides weight lifting, football was my life! So, how did I recover physically, emotionally, and morally? How do I exemplify this word, "virus?" I realized that I had much to be thankful for. I needed to work through the anger and resentment. It took strength to recognize that dreams are endless and when one departs another arrives. By putting forth maximum effort in everything that means something to me, I may be confidently described by the Latin word "arts". I give one hundred percent of my heart and loyalty to my family and friends. My effort towards my education is very important to me. Throughout High School I chose to challenge and push myself by enrolling in honors and advanced placement courses. When a new concept is introduced to me, I pick up very quickly, and then like to teach my new learned skills to my friends and classmates. At work, I have earned the confidence and trust of my boss. Hard work and perseverance brings success and self appreciation. The word "mores" is also a reflection in my life. I am very aware and appreciative of the talents and opportunities that have presented themselves to me. I have learned to accept the obstacles that are place in front of me and appreciate life for what it has given me. Furthermore, I believe strongly in treating people as I like to be treated. FSU deserves students strong in character and tradition, and I am a direct reflection of this value. Florida State University presents me with the best opportunity to further develop the traits within myself that embody the spirit of the school; "virus, arts, mores." If selected to be a part of FSU, I would continue the tradition of bringing such values of character and strength this institution. |
Vires; signifies strength of all kinds, such as moral, physical, and intellectual. I believe that this concept has affected me most throughout my high school career. Moral strength deals with the distinction between right and wrong, and through high school, your morals become more lucid then you could ever imagine. I believe in standing up for yourself and what you believe in. Everyone has their own moral beliefs. Physical strength has also played a big role in my life as well. I theorize that if you are physically fit, then you are mentally as well. I have been on a competitive cheerleading squad for 7 years, and from learning so much and being in fit, physical condition, I have set my mind mentally too. Intellectual strength however, has been the most beneficent strength through these 4 years. Intellectual strength is like building blocks, each day you build upon it more and more. Through studies, education and life lessons you can build more intellectual strength. Intellectual strength is also a powerful means to maintain inner strength and a strong sense of self-worth and relevance. Mores refers to character, custom, or tradition. When it comes to custom, I am a strong Christian, and I have been for 5 years. Along with my family, I stand up for what I believe in. Character is key, and is built on life experiences and how you can overcome the hardships. These past two years, three of my good friends have passed away, and from these fates, I have learned to keep going on and be strong. Each of these friends have inspired me and touched my heart in such a way I can't explain. I have accepted that no matter what happens, life goes on and you should believe in yourself and achieve your dreams. In this case, I believe that I am well prepared and primed to become a Florida State Seminole! | Virus; signifies strength of all kinds, such as moral, physical, and intellectual. I believe that this concept has affected me most throughout my high school career. Moral strength deals with the distinction between right and wrong, and through high school, your morals become more lucid than you could ever imagine. I believe in standing up for yourself and what you believe in. Everyone has their own moral beliefs. Physical strength has also played a big role in my life as well. I theorize that if you are physically fit, then you are mentally as well. I have been on a competitive cheerleading squad for 7 years, and from learning so much and being in fit, physical condition, I have set my mind mentally too. Intellectual strength however, has been the most beneficent strength through these 4 years. Intellectual strength is like building blocks, each day you build upon it more and more. Through studies, education and life lessons you can build more intellectual strength. Intellectual strength is also a powerful means to maintain inner strength and a strong sense of self-worth and relevance. Mores refer to character, custom, or tradition. When it comes to custom, I am a strong Christian, and I have been for 5 years. Along with my family, I stand up for what I believe in. Character is key, and is built on life experiences and how you can overcome the hardships. These past two years, three of my good friends have passed away, and from these fates, I have learned to keep going on and be strong. Each of these friends have inspired me and touched my heart in such a way I can't explain. I have accepted that no matter what happens, life goes on, and you should believe in yourself and achieve your dreams. In this case, I believe that I am well-prepared and primed to become a Florida State Seminole! |
Where could I possibly begin? Newspaper, starting with my Freshman year and continuing through to the present, has taught me more than I could write in a mere 150 words. To name a few, it has taught me how to be a leader, a listener, a teacher, and a compromiser. I started as a shy ninth grader just trying to write an article good enough to be put in my award winning high school newspaper and have culminated as the Editor-in-Chief. Not only has this paper significantly transformed me, but I have also greatly amended it. I have brought new sections, creative headers, increased numbers of contributors, greater school and hometown interest, among other changes. My role on the high school newspaper has been a pinnacle in my high school career. I will carry on the lessons I have learned for the rest of my educational career and adult life. | Where could I possibly begin? Newspaper, starting with my Freshman year and continuing through to the present, has taught me more than I could write in a mere 150 words. To name a few, it has taught me how to be a leader, a listener, a teacher, and a compromiser. I started as a shy ninth grader just trying to write an article good enough to be put in my award-winning high school newspaper and have culminated as the Editor-in-Chief. Not only has this paper significantly transformed me, but I have also greatly amended it. I have brought new sections, creative headers, increased numbers of contributors, greater school and hometown interest, among other changes. My role on the high school newspaper has been a pinnacle in my high school career. I will carry on the lessons I have learned for the rest of my educational career and adult life. |
My parents had an important influence in the kind of person I am now. Respect, moral values, good manners are just some of the principles they have implanted on me as I grew up. Undoubtedly, I was raised the old fashion way. However, I still have a long way to go if I want to be as wise as my father , and so determined as my mother. I realize now that all their actions in the past to correct my misbehavior were not pointless, part of my personality is the result of their influences. I am a good father, a good husband, and most important I am a man of values and principles. My dad is man of good sense, and I cannot take that from him. 'Don Benjamin,' as we call him, may not be a perfect father, but he is the best father of all. In one hand, my father was a very strict, and overprotective. I've cried many nights during my teenage-hood because he would not allow me to go out with my friends. But, in the other hand, he would taught me how to be self-sufficient, how to be honest, how to be responsible, and most important how to be respectful to others. Women get surprise to find out that I know how to cook, to wash dishes, to do laundry, to iron my cloth, to sew, to clean the house, and I tell them that I got it from my father. My dad thinks that he is got to keep working to support all of us. It is amazing that when I see myself working until late night, sometimes even weekends and holidays, it is like seeing my father. One day I asked him, why at your age, 65 years old, you still have to work so much, then he replied, "because the day I die, I want to leave certain that your mother and all of you will not be unsupported. My dad spent quality time with us too, and he proved to me that working hard is not an excuse to unattended the family. He make us enjoy every gathering and family time that we had. Undoubtedly, I am grateful to have my father as my mentor. Determination is one of my mom's a quality that it is still hard for me to obtain. She always achieve whatever she proposed to get, and always finished any task she started. She says to me all the time, 'don't be a mediocre, no matter how long it takes, get it done.' I am 38 years old, and I have the firmness intention to earn my bachelor degree, even if it takes more than the two years I have left. It is not only self pride, I am also doing it because of her. My mother has always been a woman of big patience. Can you imagine what it is to raise six kids while my father was working? I truly admire her for that devotion. I go crazy when I have to baby sit my two kids all by myself. Melva, my mother, is also a woman of action. She says, 'don't' think too much, just do it." Anyway, I still cannot get that right ,and I think way to much when it comes to makes decisions. I can clearly recall every argument my parents had when as a child and a teenager. Either my mother wanted to get me enroll into karate lessons or into the most exclusive private schools. My father would say there are other options that are less expensive, but she wanted it that way. I cannot blame my father anyway, I have four brothers and one sister, it is hard to keep up a financial stability with everyone's demand. At the end I got the karate lessons, and I got to study in one of the most exclusives private institutions in my country. I salute my mother. Life has taught me that without the influence of both my parents, I do not know where I would be today. But, one thing is for sure about me, 'like parents, like son.' | My parents had an important influence in the kind of person I am now. Respect, moral values, good manners are just some of the principles they have implanted on me as I grew up. Undoubtedly, I was raised the old fashion way. However, I still have a long way to go if I want to be as wise as my father, and so determined as my mother. I realize now that all their actions in the past to correct my misbehavior were not pointless, part of my personality is the result of their influences. I am a good father, a good husband, and most important I am a man of values and principles. My dad is man of good sense, and I cannot take that from him. 'Don Benjamin,' as we call him, may not be a perfect father, but he is the best father of all. In one hand, my father was a very strict, and overprotective. I've cried many nights during my teenage-hood because he would not allow me to go out with my friends. But, in the other hand, he would teach me how to be self-sufficient, how to be honest, how to be responsible, and most important how to be respectful to others. Women get surprise to find out that I know how to cook, to wash dishes, to do laundry, to iron my cloth, to sew, to clean the house, and I tell them that I got it from my father. My dad thinks that he is got to keep working to support all of us. It is amazing that when I see myself working until late night, sometimes even weekends and holidays, it is like seeing my father. One day I asked him why at your age, 65 years old, you still have to work so much, then he replied, "because the day I die, I want to leave certain that your mother and all of you will not be unsupported. My dad spent quality time with us too, and he proved to me that working hard is not an excuse to unattended the family. He makes us enjoy every gathering and family time that we had. Undoubtedly, I am grateful to have my father as my mentor. Determination is one of my mom's a quality that it is still hard for me to obtain. She always achieves whatever she proposed to get, and always finished any task she started. She says to me all the time, 'don't be a mediocre, no matter how long it takes, get it done.' I am 38 years old, and I have the firmness intention to earn my bachelor degree, even if it takes more than the two years I have left. It is not only self pride, I am also doing it because of her. My mother has always been a woman of big patience. Can you imagine what it is to raise six kids while my father was working? I truly admire her for that devotion. I go crazy when I have to baby sit my two kids all by myself. Melva, my mother, is also a woman of action. She says, 'don't' think too much, just do it." Anyway, I still cannot get that right, and I think way too much when it comes to make decisions. I can clearly recall every argument my parents had when as a child and a teenager. Either my mother wanted to get me enroll into karate lessons or into the most exclusive private schools. My father would say there are other options that are less expensive, but she wanted it that way. I cannot blame my father anyway, I have four brothers and one sister, it is hard to keep up a financial stability with everyone's demand. At the end I got the karate lessons, and I got to study in one of the most exclusives private institutions in my country. I salute my mother. Life has taught me that without the influence of both my parents, I do not know where I would be today. But, one thing is for sure about me, 'like parents, like son.' |
What are your thoughts please? Any suggestions? Do you think the content is well written? Thank you for your assistance. When I look back at the 17 years I have been in this world, I think my most meaningful experience in my life came about 2 years ago on my summer trip to Trinidad & Tobago. Most of my family is from the Caribbean island of T&T and in 2006 I finally had the chance to experience what my family's culture was all about. This experience was meaningful because it helped me burst out of my shell, gave me a new approach to life, and gave me a sense of direction of what I wanted to do in the future. I strongly believe that these experiences I had when I took my trip to Trinidad & Tobago will greatly affect my college experience and the contributions I make to the UF campus community. While on my trip to Trinidad & Tobago I had the opportunity to embrace a different culture. Whether I was watching a local goat race or enjoying the annual "Old Time Wedding Play" I got to encounter things that were new to me while at the same time learn about my family's tradition. This will help me at UF because like some many countries around the globe, the University of Florida has so much culture and tradition. Whether I am in the swamp doing the Gator chomp with the student body or singing "We are the Boys", I will enjoy and embrace the culture of the University of Florida as I do with my Trinidad & Tobago, and make it a way of life. I was always a shy person, however; my summer trip to Trinidad & Tobago helped me come out of my shell. While on that summer vacation I made new friends that I will stay in contact with for the rest of my life. I met family that I hadn't seen since I was a baby, and the fact that they were so interested in with who I was as a person made me open up, and gave me confidence that I could be myself and outgoing. I anticipate a great college experience, and I can look back at this moment as to why. When I got back home I was more outgoing and social, and I had more confidence about myself. I know while I am enjoying what people say "will be the best years of your life" I will be making numerous friends and joining organizations such as "Skateboarding Club". Furthermore, my trip to the Caribbean helped me discover things about myself, and it gave me the platform to try new things no better how out of the norm it might seem. On my Trinidad & Tobago trip I had a lot of first times. I tried new food such as dumplings and curried crab, danced in a parade, watched different sports like Cricket. This will affect my college experience in that I won't be afraid to try new things. I have adopted the motto "you only live once" and as part of the UF campus community I will be active and involved in numerous events and other activities. Before that trip I was going to major in English, but now I want to challenge myself and major in Business Administration with hopes of owning my own clothing line that represents different styles of countries, and a record company that focuses on movies and music. All in all, I think this trip has benefited me in ways I never imagined. For instance, I was afraid of flying not to long ago, but after being on a eight hour flight you come to realize that it is not that bad. I now have a desire to travel around the world to places such as Egypt and Australia and savor what the world is all about. I can honestly say that I will be bringing a unique and original style to the UF campus community that will allow me to contribute in every way possible. Sheldon C. Louis - Author34947, FLORIDA | What are your thoughts please? Any suggestions? Do you think the content is well written? Thank you for your assistance. When I look back at the 17 years I have been in this world, I think my most meaningful experience in my life came about 2 years ago on my summer trip to Trinidad camp; Tobago. Most of my family is from the Caribbean island of Tramp;T and in 2006 I finally had the chance to experience what my family's culture was all about. This experience was meaningful because it helped me burst out of my shell, gave me a new approach to life, and gave me a sense of direction of what I wanted to do in the future. I strongly believe that these experiences I had when I took my trip to Trinidad camp; Tobago will greatly affect my college experience and the contributions I make to the OF campus community. While on my trip to Trinidad camp; Tobago I had the opportunity to embrace a different culture. Whether I was watching a local goat race or enjoying the annual "Old Time Wedding Play" I got to encounter things that were new to me while at the same time learn about my family's tradition. This will help me at OF because like some many countries around the globe, the University of Florida has so much culture and tradition. Whether I am in the swamp doing the Gator chomp with the student body or singing "We are the Boys", I will enjoy and embrace the culture of the University of Florida as I do with my Trinidad camp; Tobago, and make it a way of life. I was always a shy person, however; my summer trip to Trinidad camp; Tobago helped me come out of my shell. While on that summer vacation I made new friends that I will stay in contact with for the rest of my life. I met family that I hadn't seen since I was a baby, and the fact that they were so interested in with who I was as a person made me open up, and gave me confidence that I could be myself and outgoing. I anticipate a great college experience, and I can look back at this moment as to why. When I got back home I was more outgoing and social, and I had more confidence about myself. I know while I am enjoying what people say "will be the best years of your life" I will be making numerous friends and joining organizations such as "Skateboarding Club". Furthermore, my trip to the Caribbean helped me discover things about myself, and it gave me the platform to try new things no better how out of the norm it might seem. On my Trinidad camp; Tobago trip I had a lot of first times. I tried new food such as dumplings and curried crab, danced in a parade, watched different sports like Cricket. This will affect my college experience in that I won't be afraid to try new things. I have adopted the motto "you only live once" and as part of the OF campus community I will be active and involved in numerous events and other activities. Before that trip I was going to major in English, but now I want to challenge myself and major in Business Administration with hopes of owning my own clothing line that represents different styles of countries, and a record company that focuses on movies and music. All in all, I think this trip has benefited me in ways I never imagined. For instance, I was afraid of flying not to long ago, but after being on an eight-hour flight you come to realize that it is not that bad. I now have a desire to travel around the world to places such as Egypt and Australia and savor what the world is all about. I can honestly say that I will be bringing a unique and original style to the OF campus community that will allow me to contribute in every way possible. Sheldon C. Louis - Author34947, FLORIDA |
I am applying to this undergraduate business school and want to know how I should approach this question: "HBA graduates often state that it is the diversity and caliber of the students at Ivey that make the Ivey HBA program dynamic and challenging. Please tell us in 250 words the unique characteristics and experiences that you would bring to the classroom which would enhance the educational experience of your colleagues." 1. How do you suggest I go about answering this question. I have many accomplishments and I don't how I can summarize it in only 250 words. 2. Also any suggestions on structure. 3. Any good websites with samples answers. Thanks a million | I am applying to this undergraduate business school and want to know how I should approach this question: "HBA graduates often state that it is the diversity and caliber of the students at Ivey that make the Ivey HBA program dynamic and challenging. Please tell us in 250 words the unique characteristics and experiences that you would bring to the classroom which would enhance the educational experience of your colleagues." 1. How do you suggest I go about answering this question. I have many accomplishments and I don't how I can summarize it in only 250 words. 2. Also, any suggestions on structure. 3. Any good websites with samples answers. Thanks a million |
I have played piano since the age of five. I started in California, taking lessons under the Suzuki Method for several years. I moved to Massachusetts at the age of thirteen, where I found Niva Fried, the most influential teacher of my life. She has made me a better musician, given me technique that I could have only dreamed of, and ultimately molded me into a better person through her rigorous, yet encouraging, teaching. The favorite piece I've learned under her guidance, and the experience of playing it, is revealed below. Andantino, sotto voce. Words that may sound like lyrics to an Italian operetta, the phrase denotes the tempo and manner in which Chopin's Second Ballade should be played. Of course, there is much more to music than understanding a bit of Italian. I know that I must begin playing quietly, as if whispering, and in a moderate tempo. Nevertheless, the notes aren't going to play themselves, and that is where my interpretation begins. The first page of Chopin's Second Ballade, if played well, sounds incredibly fluid and placid, and can almost put a listener to sleep. It begins with a repeating C octave, which builds into an increasingly complex structure based around the initially set quarter note-eighth note pattern. The dynamics and notes rise and fall within a small range, but the volume never exceeds a mezzo piano. As the piece returns to a new, single repeating note, one may be inclined to think that the piece is going to keep on with its calming melody. I struggle to keep my intentions a secret. Then the unthinkable happens. By far my favorite piece to play, Chopin's Second Ballade continues to captivate my emotions no matter how long I work with it. Technically and musically magnificent, the experience of learning and playing the piece has certainly made me a better musician (and given me more than a few hand cramps). Though words can only begin to express the complexity of music, this is my effort to describe something I am truly passionate about. I plan on music being a part of me for the rest of my life, and would certainly love to continue to pursue it at your school. Maybe you'll hear me play some day. | I have played piano since the age of five. I started in California, taking lessons under the Suzuki Method for several years. Furthermore, I moved to Massachusetts at the age of thirteen, where I found Nova Fried, the most influential teacher of my life. She has made me a better musician, given me technique that I could have only dreamed of, and ultimately molded me into a better person through her rigorous, yet encouraging, teaching. The favorite piece I've learned under her guidance, and the experience of playing it, is revealed below. Adapting, sotto voce. Words that may sound like lyrics to an Italian operetta, the phrase denotes the tempo and manner in which Chopin's Second Ballad should be played. Of course, there is much more to music than understanding a bit of Italian. I know that I must begin playing quietly, as if whispering, and in a moderate tempo. Nevertheless, the notes aren't going to play themselves, and that is where my interpretation begins. The first page of Chopin's Second Ballad, if played well, sounds incredibly fluid and placid, and can almost put a listener to sleep. It begins with a repeating C octave, which builds into an increasingly complex structure based around the initially set quarter note-eighth note pattern. The dynamics and notes rise and fall within a small range, but the volume never exceeds a mezzo piano. As the piece returns to a new, single repeating note, one may be inclined to think that the piece is going to keep on with its calming melody. I struggle to keep my intentions a secret. Then the unthinkable happens. By far my favorite piece to play, Chopin's Second Ballad continues to captivate my emotions no matter how long I work with it. Technically and musically magnificent, the experience of learning and playing the piece has certainly made me a better musician (and given me more than a few hand cramps). Though words can only begin to express the complexity of music, this is my effort to describe something I am truly passionate about. I plan on music being a part of me for the rest of my life, and would certainly love to continue to pursue it at your school. Maybe you'll hear me play some day. |
--- I asked, Why me? Why, when my friends are care-free and enjoying normal teenage lives, am I in this place? Why am I the one to experience an emotional burden so heavy and severe that I must suffer alone? I looked into the faces of my best friends; I tried a couple of times. Each time I looked one of them in the eyes, with a desperate desire to be understood and comforted, I eventually couldn't. I wanted to vent to them my feelings and thoughts, just as I could provoke their sympathy when I complained about how I had done terribly on a test I studied hard for. This was something of another depth, of another world of circumstances that they hadn't seen. I found no asylum for my tormented emotions in their eyes. They could not understand this experience that was of my life only. Also, I didn't want to embarrass her. I came home from school, refreshed slightly by having been around peers who were free of my troubles but also with a tugging yearning in my heart for the compassion and intimacy that could be between us without barriers, if not for this thing. I felt comforted but at the same time inconsolable. I felt lonely, distressed. I was angry. My mom called for me from upstairs, and I shook off my thoughts and rushed to the rescue. I sat down next to her. She looked weary. "Yeah, Mom?" I asked, in the same gentle, caring way I had many times before. "Why do you think your dad is trying to sell me?" She asked me, unsurprisingly. "Dad is not trying to sell you. How could you think such a thing? People around here do not sell other people...and what purpose would he have in selling you? Who would take you away, for what Mom? Think about it. It doesn't make sense. And he loves you too much, don't you realize?" I insisted, reassuring her. "Are you so sure that you know him and trust him so well?" She replied, unreasonably. It was surely unreasonable. Her beliefs were based on hallucinations and delusions. My mom suffers from mild schizophrenia. In the midst of the conversation I was having with my mom, when I saw in her face sadness and pain inflicted by the lies that controlled her sometimes, the weight I had been carrying in my heart couldn't hold itself any longer and I broke down. I started weeping. Tears streamed down my face as I thought about how she deserved so much better, and how my overworked dad and younger brother shouldn't have to go through all this. I also cried for myself. Watching my mom struggle and struggling with her have been difficult. However, as I look into the person I have become, I realize the very strong role this long journey has played in shaping my abysmal love for my mom and endurancestrength. Such experience has also caused me to seek joy that is more than happiness, real joy that withstands all circumstances. I shine in the darkness; I disregard petty rains in remembrance of storms. My relationships flourish with richness. With my unlimited ability to sympathize with others and readiness to tackle any obstacle that comes my way, as well as with my persevering ambition and faith, I look to my future. I appreciate all of my experiences that have made me stronger and tamed my humaneness. I thank God for leading me every step of the way. For all reasons other than that it's been easy, I am glad it was me. | --- I asked Why me? Why, when my friends are care-free and enjoying normal teenage lives, am I in this place? Why am I the one to experience an emotional burden so heavy and severe that I must suffer alone? I looked into the faces of my best friends; I tried a couple of times. Each time I looked one of them in the eyes, with a desperate desire to be understood and comforted, I eventually couldn't. I wanted to vent to them my feelings and thoughts, just as I could provoke their sympathy when I complained about how I had done terribly on a test I studied hard for. This was something of another depth, of another world of circumstances that they hadn't seen. I found no asylum for my tormented emotions in their eyes. They could not understand this experience that was of my life only. Also, I didn't want to embarrass her. I came home from school, refreshed slightly by having been around peers who were free of my troubles but also with a tugging yearning in my heart for the compassion and intimacy that could be between us without barriers, if not for this thing. I felt comforted but at the same time inconsolable. Furthermore, I felt lonely, distressed. Furthermore, I was angry. My mom called for me from upstairs, and I shook off my thoughts and rushed to the rescue. I sat down next to her. She looked weary. "Yeah, Mom?" I asked, in the same gentle, caring way I had many times before. "Why do you think your dad is trying to sell me?" She asked me, unsurprisingly. "Dad is not trying to sell you. How could you think such a thing? People around here do not sell other people...and what purpose would he have in selling you? Who would take you away, for what Mom? Think about it. It doesn't make sense. And he loves you too much, don't you realize?" I insisted, reassuring her. "Are you so sure that you know him and trust him so well?" She replied, unreasonably. It was surely unreasonable. Her beliefs were based on hallucinations and delusions. My mom suffers from mild schizophrenia. In the midst of the conversation I was having with my mom, when I saw in her face sadness and pain inflicted by the lies that controlled her sometimes, the weight I had been carrying in my heart couldn't hold itself any longer, and I broke down. I started weeping. Tears streamed down my face as I thought about how she deserved so much better, and how my overworked dad and younger brother shouldn't have to go through all this. I also cried for myself. Watching my mom struggle and struggling with her have been difficult. However, as I look into the person I have become, I realize the very strong role this long journey has played in shaping my abysmal love for my mom and endurance strength. Such experience has also caused me to seek joy that is more than happiness, real joy that withstands all circumstances. I shine in the darkness; I disregard petty rains in remembrance of storms. My relationships flourish with richness. With my unlimited ability to sympathize with others and readiness to tackle any obstacle that comes my way, as well as with my persevering ambition and faith, I look to my future. I appreciate all of my experiences that have made me stronger and tamed my humaneness. I thank God for leading me every step of the way. For all reasons other than that it's been easy, I am glad it was me. |
Can please review my essay.Your advice is much appreciated. Best regards,Pam Prompt: Many people claim that rock music is a bad influnce on young people.They feel it encourages drug use and in appropriate behavior. Other believe that rock music is good entertainment. They don't think that it causes social problem. In an essay of 200 words, discuss the influence of rock music on young people. You may discuss positive or negative influences, or both. Be specific and use examples to support your view. ------------ Because rock music is good entertainment for everyone especially young people,it influences good physical condition, improvement of exercise performance and the practical skill. Rock music can improve young people with their good physical condition.While listening to rock music, the heart rate increases, and then the heart muscles start working heavily to burn fat and cholesterol, the blood flows smoothly. In addition, the deep-breath from inhaling and exhaling can help the lungs to utilize oxygen effectively. As a result, the body automatically releases beta-endorphin. These have made young people to stay fit and look firm. Rock music helps young people to improve an exercise performance especially who find exercise boring. Its rhythm motives their mood to participate and enjoy in every movement of the song rather than exercise. I was one of them. After I saw aerobic exercise with rock music at a gym, my exercise attitude changed. I can enjoy rock music as well as exercise in the same time. Furthermore, many sports clubs have used rock music to motivate young people mood. Rock music is able to encourage young people to gain in the practical skill.After listening to rock music, many of them are inspired to learn the musical instruments such as the guitar or drum. The musical instruments' practice has made perfect, young people enjoy playing it from basic to advance level. This effort can make them success as famous rock music in the future. For example, The Beatles is a very famous and successful rock music band. In conclusion, many young people have been influenced by rock music. They can improve their good physical condition, exercise performance and practical skill. With all of positive influences, there is no wonder that rock music is good entertainment for young people. | Can please review my essay. Your advice is much appreciated. Best regards, Pam Prompt: Many people claim that rock music is a bad influence on young people. They feel it encourages drug use and in appropriate behavior. Others believe that rock music is good entertainment. They don't think that it causes social problem. In an essay of 200 words, discuss the influence of rock music on young people. You may discuss positive or negative influences, or both. Be specific and use examples to support your view. ------------ Because rock music is good entertainment for everyone especially young people, it influences good physical condition, improvement of exercise performance and the practical skill. Rock music can improve young people with their good physical condition. While listening to rock music, the heart rate increases, and then the heart muscles start working heavily to burn fat and cholesterol, the blood flows smoothly. In addition, the deep-breath from inhaling and exhaling can help the lungs to utilize oxygen effectively. As a result, the body automatically releases beta-endorphin. These have made young people to stay fit and look firm. Rock music helps young people to improve an exercise performance especially who find exercise boring. Its rhythm motives their mood to participate and enjoy in every movement of the song rather than exercise. I was one of them. After I saw aerobic exercise with rock music at a gym, my exercise attitude changed. I can enjoy rock music as well as exercise in the same time. Furthermore, many sports clubs have used rock music to motivate young people mood. Rock music is able to encourage young people to gain in the practical skill. After listening to rock music, many of them are inspired to learn the musical instruments such as the guitar or drum. The musical instruments' practice has made perfect, young people enjoy playing it from basic to advance level. This effort can make them success as famous rock music in the future. For example, The Beatles is a very famous and successful rock music band. In conclusion, many young people have been influenced by rock music. They can improve their good physical condition, exercise performance and practical skill. With all of positive influences, there is no wonder that rock music is good entertainment for young people. |
To feel desired is a primary biological need in life. Psychology says, as humans we are physiologically designed to seek acceptance and reverence from the world. But how to attain this? Like all members of the Animal Kingdom, we must have a niche in society, a core position in life which distinguishes us from the rest of our species. It is through this role that we hope to attain the praise of others. But does praise define meaningful success? At the time, I thought it true. Languishing on the shallow banks of the Lower Youghiogheny river after a day of whitewater rafting, I began to ponder my niche in life. During my philosophical state, yet another question entered my mind: would my said role bring me the success I coveted? Alone with no one except Mother Nature as company, my mind tried to fathom the answer to the question that it was simultaneously posing. Intuitively, I knew that my spirit lay akin with the sciences. My curiosity had always accepted the challenge of comprehending the workings of the biological world. Since childhood, I was keenly aware of my insatiable appetite to wholly absorb the occurrence of life. I strove to become involved in science research and competitions, satisfying my ever-present craving to learn. To delve into the labyrinth of biology was what my fiery internal passion urged me to do. As I grew older, discussion of possible career choices arose. And by default, I decided I would dedicate my life to understanding the complexities of the life sciences. So I had my niche figured out--I would become a healer. As a doctor I would satisfy my desire to work in the field of biology, while synchronously aiding humanity. I would be respected, fulfilling my innate need for praise. Yet, something about this rushed simplicity strongly disturbed me. Still lying nearly breathless on my back, I reminisced over the last several hours. Though it was not the first time I had ventured out to face the tempestuous waters of the Youghiogheny, that day I felt different. I imagined myself on the river. Blood pumping, lungs filled, muscles gliding with rhythm as I rowed. All the systems of my body cohesively strove to control the raft down the mighty river. Was I rowing to reach a destination? No. I was rowing to feel alive. The river's cold mist casually sprayed against my skin, bringing me back to the present. My thoughts were still toying with the idea of success. My brain magnetized the last sixteen years of its memory to the hippocampus and I hesitantly began to grasp onto an ulterior definition of success. Though it was not an instantaneous epiphany, the manifestation of a new perception slowly engulfed me. No amount of praise could bring me success, as it is not measured in superficial applaud. How many people would know my name would not be a mark of my influence on the world. Is it easy to name the last five recipients of the Nobel Prize for Science? Blatantly, for the majority, this is a difficult task. The spotlight of reverence for such achieved successes is shone upon the individual merely for minutes. After that, he or she fades into oblivion. My flaw was that I had equated success with praise. That evening, surrounded by the rugged landscape of my home state, I realized that success for me meant spiritual development. It occurred to me that I would never be satisfied unless I did for the sake of doing. I pursue science solely because I love it. I did not need reinforcement, assurance, or praise for engaging in what I truly loved, as I would gain nothing beyond a sense of superficiality from such rewards. The source of my previous uneasiness stemmed from the rash pathway I had conjectured for myself. I, like every other human, needed a reason to live. The utter isolation I felt at that moment lead me to realize that my reason must be internal. For me, satisfaction or success, whatever it may be called, had to stem from myself. | To feel desired is a primary biological need in life. Psychology says, as humans we are physiologically designed to seek acceptance and reverence from the world. But how to attain this? Like all members of the Animal Kingdom, we must have a niche in society, a core position in life which distinguishes us from the rest of our species. It is through this role that we hope to attain the praise of others. But does praise define meaningful success? At the time, I thought it's true. Languishing on the shallow banks of the Lower Youghiogheny river after a day of whitewater rafting, I began to ponder my niche in life. During my philosophical state, yet another question entered my mind: would my said role bring me the success I coveted? Alone with no one except Mother Nature as company, my mind tried to fathom the answer to the question that it was simultaneously posing. Intuitively, I knew that my spirit lay akin with the sciences. My curiosity had always accepted the challenge of comprehending the workings of the biological world. Since childhood, I was keenly aware of my insatiable appetite to wholly absorb the occurrence of life. I strove to become involved in science research and competitions, satisfying my ever-present craving to learn. To delve into the labyrinth of biology was what my fiery internal passion urged me to do. As I grew older, discussion of possible career choices arose. And by default, I decided I would dedicate my life to understanding the complexities of the life sciences. So I had my niche figured out--I would become a healer. As a doctor I would satisfy my desire to work in the field of biology, while synchronously aiding humanity. I would be respected, fulfilling my innate need for praise. Yet, something about this rushed simplicity strongly disturbed me. Still lying nearly breathless on my back, I reminisced over the last several hours. Though it was not the first time I had ventured out to face the tempestuous waters of the Youghiogheny, that day I felt different. I imagined myself on the river. Blood pumping, lungs filled, muscles gliding with rhythm as I rowed. All the systems of my body cohesively strove to control the raft down the mighty river. Was I rowing to reach a destination? No. I was rowing to feel alive. The river's cold mist casually sprayed against my skin, bringing me back to the present. My thoughts were still toying with the idea of success. My brain magnetized the last sixteen years of its memory to the hippocampus and I hesitantly began to grasp onto an ulterior definition of success. Though it was not an instantaneous epiphany, the manifestation of a new perception slowly engulfed me. No amount of praise could bring me success, as it is not measured in superficial applaud. How many people would know my name would not be a mark of my influence on the world. Is it easy to name the last five recipients of the Nobel Prize for Science? Blatantly, for the majority, this is a difficult task. The spotlight of reverence for such achieved successes is shone upon the individual merely for minutes. After that, he or she fades into oblivion. My flaw was that I had equated success with praise. That evening, surrounded by the rugged landscape of my home state, I realized that success for me meant spiritual development. It occurred to me that I would never be satisfied unless I did for the sake of doing. I pursue science solely because I love it. I did not need reinforcement, assurance, or praise for engaging in what I truly loved, as I would gain nothing beyond a sense of superficiality from such rewards. The source of my previous uneasiness stemmed from the rash pathway I had conjectured for myself. I, like every other human, needed a reason to live. The utter isolation I felt at that moment lead me to realize that my reason must be internal. For me, satisfaction or success, whatever it may be called, had to stem from myself. |
*Also, I replaced lines ____ for people's names. For the last five years, I have been struggling to comprehend my nemesis residing in America. This nemesis has been a source of great challenge and pain. One day, ____, my sophomore English teacher, was a substitute for my math class. When I walked into the classroom about ten minutes late, I was perplexed. Everyone in the class including ____ looked upset. As I placed my heavy backpack on the ground, ____, one of my classmates, said, "___, we just had a pop quiz, and everyone failed it." I was intimidated. Moreover, ___, one of the best students in class, noted, "That was the hardest quiz ever." ____ asked me to take out a piece of paper and to have a seat while he prepared for the projector. I closed my eyes and slowly took a deep breath. Then, when I looked around the room, some students hesitated to make eye contacts with me for some reason, and Tiernan, looking back and forth between ____ and me, couldn't stop laughing. "I am ready to take the quiz." I said. When he turned on the projector, nothing appeared. While I waited for him to put up the questions, ___ went in front of the classroom and used his two hands to make an acute angle. Then, he said, "Determine sine, cosine, and tangent of the angle I am making with my hands." Looking at the hands, my mind went blank; all I felt was an F on my quiz. As I strived to find the answers, I pictured myself a protractor to approximate the angle. After pondering for five minutes, I made the educated guess. As I was typing the numbers into the calculator, everyone including ____ burst into a laugh. At first, I was puzzled. Then, a smile spread across my face. I was relieved. "Oh, you were making a sarcastic humor." This indeed turned out to be an unbelievable learning experience for me. Moving to America from Korea made me much more open-minded and whetted my appetite to learn about different cultures and sense of humors. Although this taught me a great deal about recognizing sarcastic humor as a part of American culture, in the end its greatest lesson was about life. "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step." said Lao Tzu. I took a single step by adjusting to ____ High School in America. Now, a journey of a thousand miles is awaiting me in college. I am ready for a new environment, a new class to be a part of, and a new adventure. | *Also, I replaced lines ____ for people's names. For the last five years, I have been struggling to comprehend my nemesis residing in America. This nemesis has been a source of great challenge and pain. One day, ____, my sophomore English teacher, was a substitute for my math class. When I walked into the classroom about ten minutes late, I was perplexed. Everyone in the class including ____ looked upset. As I placed my heavy backpack on the ground, ____, one of my classmates, said, "___, we just had a pop quiz, and everyone failed it." I was intimidated. Moreover, ___, one of the best students in class, noted, "That was the hardest quiz ever." ____ asked me to take out a piece of paper and to have a seat while he prepared for the projector. I closed my eyes and slowly took a deep breath. Then, when I looked around the room, some students hesitated to make eye contacts with me for some reason, and Tierney, looking back and forth between ____ and me, couldn't stop laughing. "I am ready to take the quiz." I said. When he turned on the projector, nothing appeared. While I waited for him to put up the questions, ___ went in front of the classroom and used his two hands to make an acute angle. Then, he said, "Determine sine, cosine, and tangent of the angle I am making with my hands." Looking at the hands, my mind went blank; all I felt was an F on my quiz. As I strived to find the answers, I pictured myself a protractor to approximate the angle. After pondering for five minutes, I made the educated guess. As I was typing the numbers into the calculator, everyone including ____ burst into a laugh. At first, I was puzzled. Then, a smile spread across my face. I was relieved. "Oh, you were making a sarcastic humor." This indeed turned out to be an unbelievable learning experience for me. Moving to America from Korea made me much more open-minded and whetted my appetite to learn about different cultures and sense of humors. Although this taught me a great deal about recognizing sarcastic humor as a part of American culture, in the end its greatest lesson was about life. "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step." said Lao Tau. I took a single step by adjusting to ____ High School in America. Now, a journey of a thousand miles is awaiting me in college. I am ready for a new environment, a new class to be a part of, and a new adventure. |
PLEASE BE AS BRUATL AS POSSIBLE! In one's life one experiences many meaningful accomplishments. It is only after one reflects on his or her life, that the most meaningful event is discovered. By my own definition, a meaningful event leads to a gained understanding of oneself. As I reflected on major milestones in my life, I came to the realization that my most meaningful accomplishment is the day I received my letter of acceptance into the International Baccalaureate (IB) program. Although that accomplishment may seem purely academics, the IB program helped build my character inside and outside of school. My entrance into the rigorous IB program was partly a result of motivation from my family. My father inspired me to not only be a hard-working student, but a hard-working person as well, while my mother encouraged me to be more outgoing in life. However, it was my younger sister who has motivated me the most in my IB career. Although she did not help me directly, I feel I am my sister's role model and I must set a good example for her to follow. It was my sister, along with my family, who motivated me throughout grade school- which ultimately led to my own self motivation and my acceptance into the IB program. After being accepted into the IB program, I realized I would be working hard, as I have been doing my whole life. However, I failed to realize the hard work would not only be my school assignments. I recognized that I would need to work hard on building my character, in order to prepare myself for college and life afterwards. In the IB program, as an African American, I am in the minority. However, I found that being a minority added to my motivation because I felt I needed to work harder to stand out in the crowd and shine. Furthermore, the program taught me that if there was something I desire I must be outgoing and attain it. Taking that advice to heart, by my junior year I had joined nine student organizations, including soccer- which I had never played before. By my senior year I had found my true passion, Environmental Action Group, in which I am currently secretary. Many students use the college experience as a way to "discover their true inner being." The IB program has taught me to look past the hackneyed term of "finding oneself." The program helped me to discover myself in my high school career, that way I have the opportunity of attending college as a better person, in touch with myself and my aspiration of becoming a cardiologist. The program forced me to look past my shy persona and uncover my hidden leadership qualities. Using the skills I attained throughout the IB program I plan to make a difference on my college campus- whether it be big like becoming class president or simply having a voice in a student government meeting. In June 2009, when I graduate high school with my IB diploma in hand and leave the IB program I will always carry the lessons I learned in the IB program and the memory of my day of acceptance and the accomplishment that led to it all. | PLEASE BE AS BRUTAL AS POSSIBLE! In one's life one experiences many meaningful accomplishments. It is only after one reflects on his or her life, that the most meaningful event is discovered. By my own definition, a meaningful event leads to a gained understanding of oneself. As I reflected on major milestones in my life, I came to the realization that my most meaningful accomplishment is the day I received my letter of acceptance into the International Baccalaureate (IB) program. Although that accomplishment may seem purely academics, the IB program helped build my character inside and outside of school. My entrance into the rigorous IB program was partly a result of motivation from my family. My father inspired me to not only be a hard-working student, but a hard-working person as well, while my mother encouraged me to be more outgoing in life. However, it was my younger sister who has motivated me the most in my IB career. Although she did not help me directly, I feel I am my sister's role model and I must set a good example for her to follow. It was my sister, along with my family, who motivated me throughout grade school-which ultimately led to my own self motivation and my acceptance into the IB program. After being accepted into the IB program, I realized I would be working hard, as I have been doing my whole life. However, I failed to realize the hard work would not only be my school assignments. I recognized that I would need to work hard on building my character, in order to prepare myself for college and life afterwards. In the IB program, as an African American, I am in the minority. However, I found that being a minority added to my motivation because I felt I needed to work harder to stand out in the crowd and shine. Furthermore, the program taught me that if there was something I desire I must be outgoing and attain it. Taking that advice to heart, by my junior year I had joined nine student organizations, including soccer-which I had never played before. By my senior year I had found my true passion, Environmental Action Group, in which I am currently secretary. Many students use the college experience as a way to "discover their true inner being." The IB program has taught me to look past the hackneyed term of "finding oneself." The program helped me to discover myself in my high school career, that way I have the opportunity of attending college as a better person, in touch with myself and my aspiration of becoming a cardiologist. The program forced me to look past my shy persona and uncover my hidden leadership qualities. Using the skills I attained throughout the IB program I plan to make a difference on my college campus- whether it be big like becoming class president or simply having a voice in a student government meeting. In June 2009, when I graduate high school with my IB diploma in hand and leave the IB program I will always carry the lessons I learned in the IB program and the memory of my day of acceptance and the accomplishment that led to it all. |
The past seven years of my life have been spent balancing classes, making decisions, and competing in a sport that takes extreme dedication; yet I manage all of this. Vires signifies three strengths that only few can obtain, and I am one of those hardworking few. Everyone has experienced times where their morals are tested, but I can honestly say I have not, nor plan to give in when these times occur. Throughout my life I have always been true to myself and my beliefs, not changing who I am just to get the approval of surrounding people. I have always been one to solve my own problems, and depend only on myself, not others to clean up after me. There will always be people that don't agree with my decisions, or the way I have chosen to live my life and spend my time, but I have learned to understand that this will never change. I choose the right steps for me as an individual to get myself where I can succeed and get the life that I want, and know I can have. Swimming has been the biggest part of my life for the past seven years. It has tested me both mentally and physically, but I have made it thru and have come out a much better person. Every time I set a goal for myself, it isn't if I can do it, but instead when will I do it? The constant training that I have gone thru is thought of as crazy by most. I run miles, lift weights, and swim thousands of yards while keeping the thought that nothing is impossible and my future is up me in my head. I am not one to give up or quit something when things get hard or don't seem to be going in my favor. I know that you may reach low points but things can only get better if you keep pushing towards your goals. On top of practices twice a day, and spending time with the people who love me for me, I am a full time student. All throughout middle and high school I have made good grades, never coming close to failing a class. I have always taken honors, AP or Dual enrollment classes, never settling for easy. I have learned to manage my time to favor my schoolwork, as well as my athletics. If I have a problem with schoolwork I do everything possible to find an answer. I don't like having people tell me answers when I'm trying to find out for myself. I have always been interested in health and nutrition, which is why I plan on majoring in sports medicine and nutrition. I am an extremely hard worker, and love the things that I do. I don't believe that anything can stop someone from doing the things they want and love. For almost 100 years, Florida State University has been guided by the Latin words, "Vires, Artes, and Mores". These three words have different meanings, yet this school has been able to bring them all together. I would love to be a part of this place that strives to bring everyone together, no matter what their interests, or goals in life. | The past seven years of my life have been spent balancing classes, making decisions, and competing in a sport that takes extreme dedication; yet I manage all of this. Virus signifies three strengths that only few can obtain, and I am one of those hardworking few. Everyone has experienced times when their morals are tested, but I can honestly say I have not, nor plan to give in when these times occur. Throughout my life I have always been true to myself and my beliefs, not changing who I am just to get the approval of surrounding people. I have always been one to solve my own problems, and depend only on myself, not others to clean up after me. There will always be people that don't agree with my decisions, or the way I have chosen to live my life and spend my time, but I have learned to understand that this will never change. I choose the right steps for me as an individual to get myself where I can succeed and get the life that I want, and now I can have. Swimming has been the biggest part of my life for the past seven years. It has tested me both mentally and physically, but I have made it through and have come out a much better person. Every time I set a goal for myself, it isn't if I can do it, but instead when will I do it? The constant training that I have gone through is thought of as crazy by most. I run miles, lift weights, and swim thousands of yards while keeping the thought that nothing is impossible and my future is up me in my head. I am not one to give up or quit something when things get hard or don't seem to be going in my favor. Furthermore, I know that you may reach low points, but things can only get better if you keep pushing towards your goals. On top of practices twice a day, and spending time with the people who love me for me, I am a full time student. All throughout middle and high school I have made good grades, never coming close to failing a class. I have always taken honors, AP or Dual enrollment classes, never settling for easy. I have learned to manage my time to favor my schoolwork, as well as my athletics. If I have a problem with schoolwork I do everything possible to find an answer. I don't like having people tell me answers when I'm trying to find out for myself. I have always been interested in health and nutrition, which is why I plan on majoring in sports medicine and nutrition. Furthermore, I am an extremely hard worker, and love the things that I do. Furthermore, I don't believe that anything can stop someone from doing the things they want and love. For almost 100 years, Florida State University has been guided by the Latin words, "Virus, Arts, and Mores". These three words have different meanings, yet this school has been able to bring them all together. I would love to be a part of this place that strives to bring everyone together, no matter what their interests, or goals in life. |
The morning started with such promise. My Grandfather and I woke up at the break of dawn and excitedly packed our fishing gear and lunches. For days we had planned this trip, a fishing excursion that we expected to yield a great bounty of fish, enough to feed the whole family. However, the only thing we managed to catch after six hours of work was a single crawfish. Just when I was ready to give up, my grandfather, like always, came up with a solution to save the day. On the way home we made a little detour and bought a pair of catfish to present to the family as our catch of the day. After leaving the store, my grandfather explained to me that I could always achieve my goals through perseverance. I have never forgotten the lesson my grandfather taught me that day, a lesson that I apply here in the United States. My Grandfather is a quiet man who seldom speaks much, usually preferring to keep his thoughts and opinions to himself. Perhaps he has always been this way, but I believe that the long hard years of living in the former Soviet Union changed him. The most prominent feature I can remember is his eyes, one sea green and the other sky blue. I could never tell which was his real eye. I heard it had happened at the age of ten when the Nazis occupied his hometown during World War II, but he never spoke about it. My Grandfather inspires me with his independence and determination. Even with one eye, he has accomplished many things in his life. With his powerful hands, he built a summer home out of stone on the family farm, where he grew everything from potatoes to grapes. He also put his brilliant mind to work and became a champion with crossword puzzles, winning a flat screen television in a nationwide competition. From him I learned that one could overcome anything, and I put that knowledge to use when I took AP English III. Writing had not been one of my strengths, so at first, I struggled in that class. However, I did not give up and eventually overcame my difficulty, scoring well on essays. What also inspires me about my Grandfather is how he always perseveres to achieve his goals. Admiring his father, he followed in his footsteps by becoming an engineer. Even though many people tried to persuade him to choose an easier career, he would never give up. He began working towards his dream from an early age, reading books about engineering well beyond his level. After years of hard work, he graduated from Donetsk Polytechnic University with an engineering degree. My Grandfather worked in the engineering field for twenty years, for a metallurgical plant. Never satisfied with his past achievements, my Grandfather constantly sought to improve his abilities as an engineer, even though under Communist rule every worker was paid the same, so there was no point in working harder than other people. My grandfather was driven by his joy for learning. My Grandfather eventually retired and went on to teach at a metallurgical college, a job he still proudly holds today. Just like him, I strive to achieve excellence in classes, activities, and groups to which I belong. Every English, science, and history class I have taken in high school has been upper level or AP. Even now in my senior year, when most of my classmates are taking it easy, I continue to take the harder classes. I have also been accepted to the Kitty Hawk Honor Society in my JROTC unit for my grades. In addition, my hard work and determination led to my promotion to an officer within my JROTC unit. I will bring these same traits with me to college, where I will determinedly pursue my dream of a degree in Computer Engineering. Because of my grandfather's example, I feel devoted to learning and constantly seek improvement within myself. My Grandfather developed new techniques that increased productivity in metallurgical engineering and I want to do the same in the field of computer engineering. My Grandfather taught me to follow my dreams, to never give up, and give it my all, a lesson I learned at an early age and still apply today. | The morning started with such promise. My Grandfather and I woke up at the break of dawn and excitedly packed our fishing gear and lunches. For days, we had planned this trip, a fishing excursion that we expected to yield a great bounty of fish, enough to feed the whole family. However, the only thing we managed to catch after six hours of work was a single crawfish. Just when I was ready to give up, my grandfather, like always, came up with a solution to save the day. On the way home we made a little detour and bought a pair of catfish to present to the family as our catch of the day. After leaving the store, my grandfather explained to me that I could always achieve my goals through perseverance. I have never forgotten the lesson my grandfather taught me that day, a lesson that I apply here in the United States. My Grandfather is a quiet man who seldom speaks much, usually preferring to keep his thoughts and opinions to himself. Perhaps he has always been this way, but I believe that the long hard years of living in the former Soviet Union changed him. The most prominent feature I can remember is his eyes, one sea green and the other sky blue. I could never tell which was his real eye. I heard it had happened at the age of ten when the Nazis occupied his hometown during World War II, but he never spoke about it. My Grandfather inspires me with his independence and determination. Even with one eye, he has accomplished many things in his life. With his powerful hands, he built a summer home out of stone on the family farm, where he grew everything from potatoes to grapes. He also put his brilliant mind to work and became a champion with crossword puzzles, winning a flat screen television in a nationwide competition. From him, I learned that one could overcome anything, and I put that knowledge to use when I took AP English III. Writing had not been one of my strengths, so at first, I struggled in that class. However, I did not give up and eventually overcame my difficulty, scoring well on essays. What also inspires me about my Grandfather is how he always perseveres to achieve his goals. Admiring his father, he followed in his footsteps by becoming an engineer. Even though many people tried to persuade him to choose an easier career, he would never give up. He began working towards his dream from an early age, reading books about engineering well beyond his level. After years of hard work, he graduated from Donetsk Polytechnic University with an engineering degree. My Grandfather worked in the engineering field for twenty years, for a metallurgical plant. Never satisfied with his past achievements, my Grandfather constantly sought to improve his abilities as an engineer, even though under Communist rule every worker was paid the same, so there was no point in working harder than other people. My grandfather was driven by his joy for learning. My Grandfather eventually retired and went on to teach at a metallurgical college, a job he still proudly holds today. Just like him, I strive to achieve excellence in classes, activities, and groups to which I belong. Every English, science, and history class I have taken in high school has been upper level or AP. Even now in my senior year, when most of my classmates are taking it easy, I continue to take the harder classes. I have also been accepted to the Kitty Hawk Honor Society in my ROTC unit for my grades. In addition, my hard work and determination led to my promotion to an officer within my ROTC unit. I will bring these same traits with me to college, where I will determinedly pursue my dream of a degree in Computer Engineering. Because of my grandfather's example, I feel devoted to learning and constantly seek improvement within myself. My Grandfather developed new techniques that increased productivity in metallurgical engineering and I want to do the same in the field of computer engineering. My Grandfather taught me to follow my dreams, to never give up, and give it my all, a lesson I learned at an early age and still apply today. |
Question: Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you. I am a fencer. But it hasn't always been that way.Ever since I started school, I have been considered, by myself and others, as the "nerdy kid." It's not too surprising that as the "nerdy kid," I have gotten good grades and have been among the highest achievers in my class. Far from being a jock, I was tall, lanky and awkward from numerous growth spurts. While most kids were getting bruises and scars from sports, I got stretch marks. Struggling to find my identity beyond being just a good student, I too looked to sports. I tried soccer, basketball, football and golf, and was awful at all of them. Then, during my freshman year, being a fan of both swashbuckling and epic broadsword fights in the movies, I took a chance on fencing even though it is outside the arena of "normal" sports. It presented difficulties because fencing was not offered at my school and the nearest fencing club was an hour and a half away in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Nonetheless, eager to try, I started taking classes in foil. At first I felt clumsy because of fencing's many weird positions and stances. The fact that I was the "new guy" didn't help either, and I often felt all alone in a class of fifteen people. Undeterred and eager to learn more, I joined a competition class taught by Al Carter. Little did I know at the time that Coach Carter would have a bigger impact on my life than I could have ever predicted. Coach Carter was different from any coach I had ever seen. With an intellectual approach to fencing, he taught concepts instead of actions and let us decide how best to incorporate these concepts into our own fencing style. I learned that fencing was more akin to chess than other sports, using traps and ploys to mislead and dominate your opponent, always thinking about your next move. I grasped fencing quickly and realized that my tall, lanky body in conjunction with my intellect is a very powerful combination for a fencer. Finally, I had found a sport where I could use my mind as well as my body. In Coach Carter's class, I made friends with other students who were very much like me. Many were intelligent, "nerds" as some would call them, but people with whom I could truly relate. I also became friends with Coach Carter or, as I began to call him, just "Al." As we became closer, Al told me about his own struggles with fencing and his dedication to the sport as a child. I stopped seeing him as just a coach, and more as someone I could admire. After only a few months of training with Al, I was ready to start competing in tournaments. Although I had a rough start, I quickly rose through the ranks and accomplished in only two years of competitive fencing what it took others seven years or more to achieve. When I started, every point, or touch, in my favor gave me joy. Then, as I progressed, the thrill of each touch and the excitement of winning instilled in me an even greater intensity and drive. As time went on, many of the older, more experienced students began leaving my fencing class. After years in the background, I now found myself in a leadership and mentoring role, teaching new students alongside Al. I tried my hardest to make the new students better fencers by teaching them the same concepts I had learned from Al. But most of all, I wanted them to know they had a friend who would guide them, the kind of friend I wish I had when I started fencing, the kind of friend I found in Al. I know I have become a better person because of fencing and Al's influence. I feel fortunate to have found Al and realize that he was just the right person for me at that moment in my life. I am now more confident, social and outgoing, as well as mentally sharp and strategic. By teaching the younger students as well as frequently being forced to study into the wee hours of the morning in order to strike a balance between my academic responsibilities and fencing, I've grown as a person. Even though I started fencing to simply find a sport I could enjoy, through fencing I have found friends, a true mentor, an amazing passion, and the drive within myself to compete and succeed. Now when I look in the mirror, it's not a hopeless nerd staring back, it's the fencer inside me that was waiting to appear. By A. J. L. please dont copy | Question: Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you. I am a fencer. But it hasn't always been that way. Ever since I started school, I have been considered, by myself and others, as the "nerdy kid." It's not too surprising that as the "nerdy kid," I have gotten good grades and have been among the highest achievers in my class. Far from being a jock, I was tall, lanky and awkward from numerous growth spurts. While most kids were getting bruises and scars from sports, I got stretch marks. Struggling to find my identity beyond being just a good student, I too looked to sports. I tried soccer, basketball, football and golf, and was awful at all of them. Then, during my freshman year, being a fan of both swashbuckling and epic broadsword fights in the movies, I took a chance on fencing even though it is outside the arena of "normal" sports. It presented difficulties because fencing was not offered at my school and the nearest fencing club was an hour and a half away in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Nonetheless, eager to try, I started taking classes in foil. At first, I felt clumsy because of fencing's many weird positions and stances. The fact that I was the "new guy" didn't help either, and I often felt all alone in a class of fifteen people. Undeterred and eager to learn more, I joined a competition class taught by Al Carter. Little did I know at the time that Coach Carter would have a bigger impact on my life than I could have ever predicted. Coach Carter was different from any coach I had ever seen. With an intellectual approach to fencing, he taught concepts instead of actions and let us decide how best to incorporate these concepts into our own fencing style. I learned that fencing was more akin to chess than other sports, using traps and ploys to mislead and dominate your opponent, always thinking about your next move. I grasped fencing quickly and realized that my tall, lanky body in conjunction with my intellect is a very powerful combination for a fencer. Finally, I had found a sport where I could use my mind as well as my body. In Coach Carter's class, I made friends with other students who were very much like me. Many were intelligent, "nerds" as some would call them, but people with whom I could truly relate. I also became friends with Coach Carter or, as I began to call him, just "Al." As we became closer, Al told me about his own struggles with fencing and his dedication to the sport as a child. I stopped seeing him as just a coach, and more than someone I could admire. After only a few months of training with Al, I was ready to start competing in tournaments. Although I had a rough start, I quickly rose through the ranks and accomplished in only two years of competitive fencing what it took others seven years or more to achieve. When I started, every point, or touch, in my favor gave me joy. Then, as I progressed, the thrill of each touch and the excitement of winning instilled in me an even greater intensity and drive. As time went on, many of the older, more experienced students began leaving my fencing class. After years in the background, I now found myself in a leadership and mentoring role, teaching new students alongside Al. I tried my hardest to make the new students better fencers by teaching them the same concepts I had learned from Al. But most of all, I wanted them to know they had a friend who would guide them, the kind of friend I wish I had when I started fencing, the kind of friend I found in Al. I know I have become a better person because of fencing and Al's influence. I feel fortunate to have found Al and realize that he was just the right person for me at that moment in my life. Furthermore, I am now more confident, social and outgoing, as well as mentally sharp and strategic. By teaching the younger students as well as frequently being forced to study into the wee hours of the morning in order to strike a balance between my academic responsibilities and fencing, I've grown as a person. Even though I started fencing to simply find a sport I could enjoy, through fencing I have found friends, a true mentor, an amazing passion, and the drive within myself to compete and succeed. Now when I look in the mirror, it's not a hopeless nerd staring back, it's the fencer inside me that was waiting to appear. By A. J. L. please don't copy |
More importantly, the school will enable me to obtain my Doctor of Pharmacy Degree in less than three years, thus fulfilling my educational goal. As I know that the University of the Pacific has some helpful services where will help me to success my goal such as TriO program and Tutorial Assistance. Moreover, at the University of the Pacific I know that my success will be ensured by the dedicated faculty and staff, state-of-the-art learning facilities, and personal attention that I will receive. After graduating, I will not only be a pharmacist, but also a critical thinker and a problem solver capable of dealing with the rapidly changing healthcare environment. Completing the Doctor of Pharmacy Program at the University of the Pacific my professional goals such as developing, dispensing, and helping to make the recommendations for new medications will be satisfied. | More importantly, the school will enable me to obtain my Doctor of Pharmacy Degree in less than three years, thus fulfilling my educational goal. As I know that the University of the Pacific has some helpful services where it will help me to success my goal such as Trio program and Tutorial Assistance. Moreover, at the University of the Pacific I know that my success will be ensured by the dedicated faculty and staff, state-of-the-art learning facilities, and personal attention that I will receive. After graduating, I will not only be a pharmacist, but also a critical thinker and a problem solver capable of dealing with the rapidly changing healthcare environment. Completing the Doctor of Pharmacy Program at the University of the Pacific my professional goals such as developing, dispensing, and helping to make the recommendations for new medications will be satisfied. |
I first began tutoring younger students when I was 17. Eventually, I started volunteering as a student mentor at a nearby secondary school. We taught a wide array of subjects, ranging from English and Maths to Design. As a student mentor, I was also involved in the planning of group lessons as well as orientation programs. After all these years, I have grown to realize and appreciate the mutual relationship teachers and students share. Through tutoring, I have discovered the joy of service to others. Looking at the gleeful faces of the students when they showed me their improved results made me satisfied. Tutoring others has also strengthened my own grasp of fundamental academic concepts, and has enabled me to develop good motivational skills. The lessons learned from my tutoring experience have certainly been invaluable and I hope that I can continue guiding others in the years to come. [149 words] I hope that someone can help to improve on the flow of the essay. thanks! | I first began tutoring younger students when I was 17. Eventually, I started volunteering as a student mentor at a nearby secondary school. We taught a wide array of subjects, ranging from English and Math to Design. As a student mentor, I was also involved in the planning of group lessons as well as orientation programs. After all these years, I have grown to realize and appreciate the mutual relationship teachers and students share. Through tutoring, I have discovered the joy of service to others. Looking at the gleeful faces of the students when they showed me their improved results made me satisfied. Tutoring others has also strengthened my own grasp of fundamental academic concepts, and has enabled me to develop good motivational skills. The lessons learned from my tutoring experience have certainly been invaluable, and I hope that I can continue guiding others in the years to come. [149 words] I hope that someone can help to improve on the flow of the essay. Thanks! |
Of the three philosophical ideas, the one that has the strongest representation in my life is Artes. Music has been a part of my life since the day I was born. I grew up with music being played all around me all the time. When I was in elementary school, my parents bought me an electric keyboard. I took off from there. I've been a practiced musician for 7 years and I fully understand how important persistence, determination, and practice have been in sculpting my music abilities. These traits have also proven to be essential in academic situations, as well as my pursuit of musical excellence. Mores is another important aspect of my life because without tradition or character nothing in the world would be worth striving to achieve. In my county honor band, the first chair trumpet has been a member on my high school band since the school was opened five years ago. Since that first year, the current holder if the first chair position has been an inspiration for other players to practice as much as possible and to strive to be the one to take his or her place. This year, as the lead trumpet player at my high school, the determination I have to be the next player from my school to be in the first chair is even stronger because I know my actions will influence those after me exactly as the actions of those before me affected my persistence and determination to achieve excellence." | Of the three philosophical ideas, the one that has the strongest representation in my life is Arts. Music has been a part of my life since the day I was born. I grew up with music being played all around me all the time. When I was in elementary school, my parents bought me an electric keyboard. I took off from there. I've been a practiced musician for 7 years and I fully understand how important persistence, determination, and practice have been in sculpting my music abilities. These traits have also proven to be essential in academic situations, as well as my pursuit of musical excellence. Mores are another important aspect of my life because without tradition or character nothing in the world would be worth striving to achieve. In my county honor band, the first chair trumpet has been a member on my high school band since the school was opened five years ago. Since that first year, the current holder if the first chair position has been an inspiration for other players to practice as much as possible and to strive to be the one to take his or her place. This year, as the lead trumpet player at my high school, the determination I have to be the next player from my school to be in the first chair is even stronger because I know my actions will influence those after me exactly as the actions of those before me affected my persistence and determination to achieve excellence." |
Undoubtedly I have picked up much of my morality from my parents and God and have developed much of my own also by setting goals and carrying through with a plan that helps me reach my highest potential. My parents have raised me to be a productive ,proactive caring member of society and to treat others with kindness and respect because of who you are not because of who they are. I grew up thinking that bad things only happened to other people until my secure, happy little world shattered when my parents told me they were getting divorced. At first i took it personally. After my mother and father separated I realized that bad things can happen to me and with the help of my morals and the will of God I was able to get through this difficult time in my life and not let it affect my goals and dreams of pursuing joy through concentrating on my education and focusing on my blessings. I soon realized that although the transition of living in a broken home was not about me but my parents decision to move in opposite directions. They both still continued to love and support me just as they had before. Even through the rough times my morals and values have really kept my head straight and my focus on school. I always believed a person with intelligence but lacks morals will not succeed in life. For it is just as important to feed your spirit as it is your brain. Along with my morality, my intellectual ability has also helped me achieve many things in my life including my grades in school. Whether it be a speech contest, talent show, sports, I always give 110%. As Vince Lombardi said "The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will," and I have had the fighting will to obtain an exceptional GPA and I have challenged myself by taking high academic courses through high school. With my strong moral and intellectual ability's I believe I would be an important asset to the Florida State University student community. Anybody can go to college but only the selected few and talented can become a Seminole and I am one of those few. | Undoubtedly I have picked up much of my morality from my parents and God and have developed much of my own also by setting goals and carrying through with a plan that helps me reach my highest potential. My parents have raised me to be a productive, proactive caring member of society and to treat others with kindness and respect because of who you are not because of who they are. I grew up thinking that bad things only happened to other people until my secure, happy little world shattered when my parents told me they were getting divorced. At first I took it personally. After my mother and father separated I realized that bad things can happen to me and with the help of my morals and the will of God I was able to get through this difficult time in my life and not let it affect my goals and dreams of pursuing joy through concentrating on my education and focusing on my blessings. I soon realized that although the transition of living in a broken home was not about me but my parents decision to move in opposite directions. They both still continued to love and support me just as they had before. Even through the rough times my morals and values have really kept my head straight and my focus on school. I always believed a person with intelligence but lacks morals will not succeed in life. For it is just as important to feed your spirit as it is your brain. Along with my morality, my intellectual ability has also helped me achieve many things in my life including my grades in school. Whether it be a speech contest, talent show, sports, I always give 110%. As Vince Lombardi said "The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will," and I have had the fighting will to obtain an exceptional GPA and I have challenged myself by taking high academic courses through high school. With my strong moral and intellectual ability's I believe I would be an important asset to the Florida State University student community. Anybody can go to college but only the selected few and talented can become a Seminole, and I am one of those few. |
There have been many obstacles in the long road I took to get where I am today. One of them, however, stands out the most because it not only changed where I lived and what my environment was, it also change who I am and how I perceive things. Although I live in the United States now, I was born and raised in Brazil. I grew up in the middle of a strong and emotionally connected family. If anyone had asked me five years ago if I could imagine living outside my comfort zone, I would have said no. Little did I know that in the next few months my life was going to be completely transformed. My dad has worked his entire life drawing and managing shoe lines. When I was young, he was always traveling to distant places like Italy, China, and the US. The businesses in Brazil were prospering, but all of a sudden, our region started to go into a recession. My dad's company was compromised and his bosses offered him the chance of a life time: move to the US and start life from zero. My family and I were devastated with the news. After all, my entire family lived in the same city, and leaving would mean missing all the fun. My parents, however, saw this as a great opportunity to give me and my brother an unforgettable experience. At first, I was really upset that we were leaving all our lives behind to create a new one in a foreign country. The last few months in Brazil flew by, and in the blink of an eye, we were boarding to our new adventure, the United States of America. I had visited the US before, but knowing we only had a one way ticket gave me a bitter feeling. The moment I stepped outside of the airplane, however, I felt lucky because I realized I had been given a once in a lifetime chance to become a better, more cultured person. When I arrived in the US I had to face a road full of bumps. My English was limited, and I knew the United States was nothing like Brazil. Customs and traditions were different, and I learned this the hard way. In Brazil, when we greet people we usually exchange a light kiss on the cheeks. In the US however, there is this thing people like to call a "personal bubble" that should not be popped, and since I didn't know any better, I was constantly crossing that boundary. It wasn't until my english teacher gave me an american cultural lesson that I stopped doing that. Although I like many of the traditions practiced in the US, I have not completely "americanized" the way I am. I believe that being from a different country brings a lot to the table and it is a break from the ordinany. All my friends love my accent and my experiences from another culture. It wasn't long before my parents found a good school district to move into. Although I had finished seventh grade in Brazil with excellent grades, the principal at my new school chose to hold me back due to the language. At first, I wasn't looking forward to repeating half of something I had already completed, but soon afterwards I realized that learning the language was more important. Ever since that moment I have been pushing myself harder and harder to keep getting straight "As". As I got used to English, I also began to value things like teamwork, creativity and innovation. The way everything was organized and respected amazed me because all of my friends were always doing something that in some way or another would benefit the school. It didn't take me long to adhere to those activities. Days turned into years and eight grade was coming to an end. Since we had purchased a house, I thought we had settled in Boston. My father, however, had another trick up his sleeve. He told us he had gotten another job in Florida, and in a couple of months we were going to be living there. I was dispirited. I had been laying the foundation for my HS years since I had moved to Boston, and moving meant all those foundations had to be abandoned. After all, making new friends, getting used to a completely different culture and being 3,000 miles away from your family is not easy. Doing it twice definitely takes a lot of emotional strength. We moved to Jacksonville in January 2007. Not long after that my parents bought a house and I started going to BTHS. Although I missed Boston, it didn't take me long to start feeling like I was part of something special. For example, my new friends noticed that I was still a bit upset about the transformation my life had taken and decided to make me feel better about moving. They invited all of their friends over for a barbecue and I was introduced to everyone. Since I had an interesting background and many thrilling stories to share, I had no problem making friends. I take every opportunity I am given to learn, and I never hesitate to help others in their studies. I have always pushed myself to the best of my abilities, however, I didn't take honors classes in my 9-10 years because English was still challenging me. In my Junior year, however, I began taking AP and Honors classes. Those classes pushed me to my limits but I managed to raise the bar once again and maintain my 4.12 GPA. Besides studying, in my leisure time I joined clubs, tutored my brother, and worked 20 hw in a grocery store. My HS years were sensational. I joined many clubs and always engaged in school events. I joined Mu-Alpha-Theta to share my interest for mathematics with the school. Because I know how difficult life can sometimes be without a helping hand willing to pull you up, I joined the Key-Club to help others. My friends convinced me to join the Photo-Club because all I would talk about was my love of capturing life's most interesting moments and sharing them with the world. Today, I look back and remember all the good times I had while in those clubs and I look forwards to our next meetings. My brother has difficulty learning and I helped him overcome this setback. Almost everyday we study together and I help him with homework. Ever since I started tutoring him, he has been getting better grades and making more friends at school. I am very proud of being able to help my brother, and although he takes it for granted sometimes, I know he will appreciate my help in the future. Along the years I have succeeded in many environments, and I can never thank my parents enough for taking the risk of moving into a foreign country. I can proudly say that with a lot of effort and dedication, I overcame those bumps, and I can proudly say I am in the top 9% of my graduating class of 656 students. This entire experience has shaped my life from then on. I now know I have the capacity and ability to overcome whatever life throws at me next. I also learned to appreciate what I can do with my life as well as life itself. With these lessons learned from this experience, I am confident I can excel at the University of Central Florida. thanks you everyone ;] | There have been many obstacles in the long road I took to get where I am today. One of them, however, stands out the most because it not only changed where I lived and what my environment was, it also changes who I am and how I perceive things. Although I live in the United States now, I was born and raised in Brazil. I grew up in the middle of a strong and emotionally connected family. If anyone had asked me five years ago if I could imagine living outside my comfort zone, I would have said no. Little did I know that in the next few months my life was going to be completely transformed. My dad has worked his entire life drawing and managing shoe lines. When I was young, he was always traveling to distant places like Italy, China, and the US. The businesses in Brazil were prospering, but all of a sudden, our region started to go into a recession. My dad's company was compromised, and his bosses offered him the chance of a lifetime: move to the US and start life from zero. My family and I were devastated with the news. After all, my entire family lived in the same city, and leaving would mean missing all the fun. My parents, however, saw this as a great opportunity to give me and my brother an unforgettable experience. At first, I was really upset that we were leaving all our lives behind to create a new one in a foreign country. The last few months in Brazil flew by, and in the blink of an eye, we were boarding to our new adventure, the United States of America. I had visited the US before, but knowing we only had a one way ticket gave me a bitter feeling. The moment I stepped outside the airplane, however, I felt lucky because I realized I had been given a once in a lifetime chance to become a better, more cultured person. When I arrived in the US I had to face a road full of bumps. My English was limited, and I knew the United States was nothing like Brazil. Customs and traditions were different, and I learned this the hard way. In Brazil, when we greet people we usually exchange a light kiss on the cheeks. In the US however, there is this thing people like to call a "personal bubble" that should not be popped, and since I didn't know any better, I was constantly crossing that boundary. It wasn't until my English teacher gave me an American cultural lesson that I stopped doing that. Although I like many of the traditions practiced in the US, I have not completely "Americanized" the way I am. I believe that being from a different country brings a lot to the table, and it is a break from the ordinary. All my friends love my accent and my experiences from another culture. It wasn't long before my parents found a good school district to move into. Although I had finished seventh grade in Brazil with excellent grades, the principal at my new school chose to hold me back due to the language. At first, I wasn't looking forward to repeating half of something I had already completed, but soon afterwards I realized that learning the language was more important. Ever since that moment I have been pushing myself harder and harder to keep getting straight "As". As I got used to English, I also began to value things like teamwork, creativity and innovation. The way everything was organized and respected amazed me because all of my friends were always doing something that in some way or another would benefit the school. It didn't take me long to adhere to those activities. Days turned into years and eight grade was coming to an end. Since we had purchased a house, I thought we had settled in Boston. My father, however, had another trick up his sleeve. He told us he had gotten another job in Florida, and in a couple of months we were going to be living there. I was dispirited. I had been laying the foundation for my HS years since I had moved to Boston, and moving meant all those foundations had to be abandoned. After all, making new friends, getting used to a completely different culture and being 3,000 miles away from your family is not easy. Doing it twice definitely takes a lot of emotional strength. We moved to Jacksonville in January 2007. Not long after that my parents bought a house and I started going to BTHS. Although I missed Boston, it didn't take me long to start feeling like I was part of something special. For example, my new friends noticed that I was still a bit upset about the transformation my life had taken and decided to make me feel better about moving. They invited all of their friends over for a barbecue, and I was introduced to everyone. Since I had an interesting background and many thrilling stories to share, I had no problem making friends. I take every opportunity I am given to learn, and I never hesitate to help others in their studies. I have always pushed myself to the best of my abilities, however, I didn't take honors classes in my 9-10 years because English was still challenging me. In my Junior year, however, I began taking AP and Honors classes. Those classes pushed me to my limits, but I managed to raise the bar once again and maintain my 4.12 GPA. Besides studying, in my leisure time I joined clubs, tutored my brother, and worked 20 HW in a grocery store. My HS years were sensational. I joined many clubs and always engaged in school events. I joined Mu-Alpha-Theta to share my interest for mathematics with the school. Because I know how difficult life can sometimes be without a helping hand willing to pull you up, I joined the Key-Club to help others. My friends convinced me to join the Photo-Club because all I would talk about was my love of capturing life's most interesting moments and sharing them with the world. Today, I look back and remember all the good times I had while in those clubs and I look forwards to our next meetings. My brother has difficulty learning and I helped him overcome this setback. Almost everyday we study together, and I help him with homework. Ever since I started tutoring him, he has been getting better grades and making more friends at school. I am very proud of being able to help my brother, and although he takes it for sometimes granted, I know he will appreciate my help in the future. Along the years I have succeeded in many environments, and I can never thank my parents enough for taking the risk of moving into a foreign country. I can proudly say that with a lot of effort and dedication, I overcame those bumps, and I can proudly say I am in the top 9% of my graduating class of 656 students. This entire experience has shaped my life from then on. I now know I have the capacity and ability to overcome whatever life throws at me next. I also learned to appreciate what I can do with my life as well as life itself. With these lessons learned from this experience, I am confident I can excel at the University of Central Florida. thank you everyone ;] |
My addition to the diversity in a college community comes in the form of real-world experience, coupled with my family background. My connections to the working and middle class separate me from the usual teenage aloofness and sense of entitlement that is often associated with the prospective college student. My personal experience comes from working as a secretary at a real estate office, which undeniably feels first-hand the pressure put on the real estate market from the current financial crisis the economy is suffering through. Foreclosures and the mortgage crisis are the topics of everyday conversation, and my knowledge and direct interaction with those who have already lost their homes or are on the brink helps me to appreciate how difficult it is to maintain an income that supplements even solely essential spending. My father's job and life as a self-made small business owner building and selling homes also illustrates to me the hardships faced and overcome in a world where nothing is handed out. My father grew up in Poland; technically I am a first-generation American. He came to the United States at seventeen with his father, who worked as a taxi driver in the Polish capitol city, Warsaw. They brought with them two suitcases and no knowledge of the English language. My father attended high school and worked two jobs to pay rent in a tiny apartment in New Jersey and sent whatever money was left over to his mother and sister, who remained in their own tiny apartment in Warsaw. Eventually putting himself through what is now known as Union County College for two years, he then graduated with a Bachelor's degree in business from Upsala College and continued working for everything he owned. Hearing these stories and seeing firsthand those who struggle to keep their financial heads above water gives me a fresh sense of appreciation for the things I do have, and an unbridled sense of earning the things I want. I don't care as much about grammar and semantics as much as if the general essay actually answers the prompt. | My addition to the diversity in a college community comes in the form of real-world experience, coupled with my family background. My connections to the working and middle class separate me from the usual teenage aloofness and sense of entitlement that is often associated with the prospective college student. My personal experience comes from working as a secretary at a real estate office, which undeniably feels first-hand the pressure put on the real estate market from the current financial crisis the economy is suffering through. Foreclosures and the mortgage crisis are the topics of everyday conversation, and my knowledge and direct interaction with those who have already lost their homes or are on the brink helps me to appreciate how difficult it is to maintain an income that supplements even solely essential spending. My father's job and life as a self-made small business owner building and selling homes also illustrates to me the hardships faced and overcome in a world where nothing is handed out. My father grew up in Poland; technically I am a first-generation American. He came to the United States at seventeen with his father, who worked as a taxi driver in the Polish capitol city, Warsaw. They brought with them two suitcases and no knowledge of the English language. My father attended high school and worked two jobs to pay rent in a tiny apartment in New Jersey and sent whatever money was left over to his mother and sister, who remained in their own tiny apartment in Warsaw. Eventually putting himself through what is now known as Union County College for two years, he then graduated with a Bachelor's degree in business from Uppsala College and continued working for everything he owned. Hearing these stories and seeing firsthand those who struggle to keep their financial heads above water gives me a fresh sense of appreciation for the things I do have, and an unbridled sense of earning the things I want. I don't care as much about grammar and semantics as much as if the general essay actually answers the prompt. |
I am not involved in every club. But I am passionate about each activity which I am apart of. In my school's drama program, the Opening Night Act, I have had the opportunity of playing roles on stage as well as off. Last spring, during our production of Bye Bye, Birdie, I challenged myself with my first on stage role-Mr. Johnson. Upon acquiring the part, I discovered that this character would not only act, but also sing and dance. As the rehearsals progressed, I found myself quite tense and nervous about being in front of an audience. The ONA assisted anyone who struggles. Teamwork was very abundant. Eventually, I found myself even helping others. This is not like all other activities out there. The ONA is different. We are like a family. Input would be great! | I am not involved in every club. But I am passionate about each activity which I am a part of. In my school's drama program, the Opening Night Act, I have had the opportunity of playing roles on stage as well as off. Last spring, during our production of Bye Bye, Birdie, I challenged myself with my first onboard role-Mr. Johnson. Upon acquiring the part, I discovered that this character would not only act, but also sing and dance. As the rehearsals progressed, I found myself quite tense and nervous about being in front of an audience. The ON assisted anyone who struggles. Teamwork was very abundant. Eventually, I found myself even helping others. This is not like all other activities out there. The ON is different. We are like a family. Input would be great! |
"Your grades would have been much better if you had invested more time and effort in your studies." My father's incessant disapproval towards cyber-gaming hasn't surprised me at all. As with most Asian societies, the pursuit of academic excellence is widely regarded as the only path to success in life. The mainstream media has not spared the gaming scene either, often depicting it as a "vile corrupter of youths". It had been three long years since my debut in the competitive gaming scene. I was only a rookie when I took part in the World Cyber Games, often hailed as the Olympic equivalent of e-sports, back in 2004. At that time, I started playing the real-time strategy game Warcraft 3 because it proved to be far more challenging than traditional turn-based games due to its emphasis on quick thinking. It was a little daunting at first as most of my opponents were older and seemed more experienced than me. Predictably, I suffered a humiliating defeat due to my inexperience and lack of confidence. However, I was determined to overcome the odds, and embarked on a grueling training regime that involved careful strategic analyses. My endeavors paid off, as I ratcheted up the gaming ranks, but somehow the gold medal always seemed to elude me - I had to make do with a silver in 2005 and my performance in 2006 was disastrous due to a stomach upset. With the imminent arrival of WCG 2007, I sensed that I could finally break this jinx. For many nights, I had stayed up practicing my strategies and studying my opponents. Coffee had quickly become a companion of mine during these hours of pin-drop silence and pitch darkness in my neighborhood. On the night before the competition, I was exhausted, yet even that could not suppress the anxiety and anticipation within me. I called it a night barely an hour before the crack of dawn, and spared myself only a few hours of sleep before I was awake again. My resolution to leave no stone unturned saw me rewatching my opponents' games just before leaving for the venue. After gobbling down my breakfast and receiving well-wishes from my family, I boarded the train headed for the city with my trusty keyboard and mouse safely tucked inside my backpack. The games started soon after I arrived at the competition venue. My first three opponents did not pose a huge threat and I triumphed easily. For the first time in years, I smelt blood. I was not going to be a pushover for my lasting rival "Sheep", who was awaiting me in the finals. Sheep was your typical teenage melodramatic antagonist - haughty, pretentious and scheming. Matches against him often included psychological warfare as he always tried to manipulate his opponents. Yet, Sheep's skill was irrefutable. He had steamrolled over me in the past few competitions and never failed to rub salt into my open wounds with his biting sarcastic remarks. After both of us set up our equipment on stage, the games started promptly. As the countdown ticked from 5 to 1, my heart raced. The stakes were high and I could not afford to lose this match. The first two games were nail-biting and we ended with a tie. I had one final game to prove myself, and I understood the importance of maintaining my clarity of thought. Our starting selection of units was similar in the final game but our play styles differed greatly. Sheep was an extremely aggressive player who preferred an offensive stance, whereas I adopted a more unorthodox and defensive approach. Initially, we were evenly matched but soon, Sheep started training more troops and went on the offensive. My forces were smaller in number as I was conserving my resources to train more powerful units. Unfortunately, Sheep managed to destroy a huge portion of my fortifications and cornered me inside my own base. I was ready to throw in the towel, aware that my worst nightmare was becoming reality. Grief was slowly creeping into me. If I had quit the game, my WCG journey would end right then. Although the game was hanging by a thread, it was a thread nonetheless. Past experiences have made me aware that aggressive players have a tendency to play recklessly and I managed to capitalize on his complacency and urgency in trying to force a quick surrender from me. He lost focus, fell prey to my bait, and presented me the opportunity to turn the tides towards my favor, which I gladly took. Subsequently, it was an easy route to victory for me. Although I was freezing in my jacket in the convention hall, sweat was trickling off my forehead after the intense game. I emerged from my booth to be greeted with a resounding applause from a thrilled audience. I spotted a few familiar faces and waved to them. Even Sheep, who still appeared perplexed at his loss, was uncharacteristically generous with his commendations for me. As I stepped onto the podium to receive my gold medal, it occurred to me with great pleasure that I had finally achieved something my parents could be proud of. Today, that medal remains nestled in a corner of my desk, which currently houses other medals I won. Should I lose interest in gaming in future, I can at least revel in the pride that I was once a champion in this fraternity after all. [about 900 words] I have corrected this essay so many times. At first it was over 1200 words but I decided to cut down on a lot of details during each of the games as it was a little too long compared to the average essay. I wish to know how I should further improve on it to be better able to captivate the reader and get hisher attention. Thanks. | "Your grades would have been much better if you had invested more time and effort in your studies." My father's incessant disapproval towards cyber-gaming hasn't surprised me at all. As with most Asian societies, the pursuit of academic excellence is widely regarded as the only path to success in life. The mainstream media has not spared the gaming scene either, often depicting it as a "vile corrupter of youths". It had been three long years since my debut in the competitive gaming scene. I was only a rookie when I took part in the World Cyber Games, often hailed as the Olympic equivalent of e-sports, back in 2004. At that time, I started playing the real-time strategy game Warcraft 3 because it proved to be far more challenging than traditional turn-based games due to its emphasis on quick thinking. It was a little daunting at first as most of my opponents were older and seemed more experienced than me. Predictably, I suffered a humiliating defeat due to my inexperience and lack of confidence. However, I was determined to overcome the odds, and embarked on a grueling training regime that involved careful strategic analyses. My endeavors paid off, as I ratcheted up the gaming ranks, but somehow the gold medal always seemed to elude me - I had to make do with a silver in 2005 and my performance in 2006 was disastrous due to a stomach upset. With the imminent arrival of WCG 2007, I sensed that I could finally break this jinx. For many nights, I had stayed up practicing my strategies and studying my opponents. Coffee had quickly become a companion of mine during these hours of pin-drop silence and pitch darkness in my neighborhood. On the night before the competition, I was exhausted, yet even that could not suppress the anxiety and anticipation within me. I called it a night barely an hour before the crack of dawn, and spared myself only a few hours of sleep before I was awake again. My resolution to leave no stone unturned saw me rewatching my opponents' games just before leaving for the venue. After gobbling down my breakfast and receiving well-wishes from my family, I boarded the train headed for the city with my trusty keyboard and mouse safely tucked inside my backpack. The games started soon after I arrived at the competition venue. My first three opponents did not pose a huge threat and I triumphed easily. For the first time in years, I smelt blood. I was not going to be a pushover for my lasting rival "Sheep", who was awaiting me in the finals. Sheep was your typical teenage melodramatic antagonist - haughty, pretentious and scheming. Matches against him often included psychological warfare as he always tried to manipulate his opponents. Yet, Sheep's skill was irrefutable. He had steamrolled over me in the past few competitions and never failed to rub salt into my open wounds with his biting sarcastic remarks. After both of us set up our equipment on stage, the games started promptly. As the countdown ticked from 5 to 1, my heart raced. The stakes were high, and I could not afford to lose this match. The first two games were nail-biting, and we ended with a tie. I had one final game to prove myself, and I understood the importance of maintaining my clarity of thought. Our starting selection of units was similar in the final game, but our play styles differed greatly. Sheep was an extremely aggressive player who preferred an offensive stance, whereas I adopted a more unorthodox and defensive approach. Initially, we were evenly matched but soon, Sheep started training more troops and went on the offensive. My forces were smaller as I was conserving my resources to train more powerful units. Unfortunately, Sheep managed to destroy a huge portion of my fortifications and cornered me inside my own base. I was ready to throw in the towel, aware that my worst nightmare was becoming reality. Grief was slowly creeping into me. If I had quit the game, my WCG journey would end right then. Although the game was hanging by a thread, it was a thread nonetheless. Experiences have made me aware that aggressive players have a tendency to play recklessly, and I managed to capitalize on his complacency and urgency in trying to force a quick surrender from me. He lost focus, fell prey to my bait, and presented me the opportunity to turn the tides towards my favor, which I gladly took. Subsequently, it was an easy route to victory for me. Although I was freezing in my jacket in the convention hall, sweat was trickling off my forehead after the intense game. I emerged from my booth to be greeted with a resounding applause from a thrilled audience. I spotted a few familiar faces and waved to them. Even Sheep, who still appeared perplexed at his loss, was uncharacteristically generous with his commendations for me. As I stepped onto the podium to receive my gold medal, it occurred to me with great pleasure that I had finally achieved something my parents could be proud of. Today, that medal remains nestled in a corner of my desk, which currently houses other medals I won. Should I lose interest in gaming in the future, I can at least revel in the pride that I was once a champion in this fraternity after all. [about 900 words] I have corrected this essay so many times. At first, it was over 1200 words, but I decided to cut down on a lot of details during each of the games as it was a little too long compared to the average essay. I wish to know how I should further improve on it to be better able to captivate the reader and get higher attention. Thanks. |
Personal Statement When we find a strand of hair lost from our head, we make a big fuss out of it, but when its on our head with other hairs, we act as it is not there. Recently I lost my uncle during the summer. Because of my actions, I missed my chance of saying good bye to my uncle and a chance to appreciate him. I was too slothful and selfish, that I refused to help my uncle in his last summer as a human being. I realize that the choices I made were erroneous. It was a hot and tiresome summer, and it was my time of the year to reward myself by relaxing and learning how to play the guitar to make up the times that I sacrificed from all my community services during the school year. Out of no where, a random phone call "Ringgggg ringggg," about ten seconds later I picked up the phone, "Hello?" I asked. My uncle on the other side says "Hi Nick! Would you like to come visit me and help me around the house?" Right when I heard that, I said "No sorry uncle, I can't". Then I heard my uncle in a sad tone asking to speak to my mom, so I handed my mom the phone. They talked for about ten minutes. After that my mom forced me to go visit my uncle. So I decided to visit my uncle the next day. I had to cancel all my plans, and I knew it was going to be tedious visiting my uncle. I felt really angry, and melancholy that I couldn't sleep in for the next couple days. Next day I came to my uncle's house. His house was very hectic. Debris was all over the floor, and the house had a tick fog of chalky powder lingering around the living room. I knew that there was a bountiful of work to do. His house was far from finish. As I entered the house, I thought I was in hell. I was suffocating by the thick fog that the house created. It was hot and it gave me an uneasy feeling. All of this unpleasantness drew my curiosity to ask my uncle what happened to his house, and he responded "I'm fixing my house, making it newer." I thought that his house would never finish without helpers. First we started from the bath room, the room reeks so badly that I had to wear a mask. It took me about five minutes for my back to soak in sweat. It was hard work, and I knew that I could not work under this unpleasant environment. After about an hour I decided to leave. Before I left, I made a lie to my uncle that I have to go help my mom. Leaving the house of chaos made me feel alleviated. Quickly I ran to my car and drove to my friend's house. I didn't have any guilt leaving my uncle, I was actually relieved and delighted that I left his house. The second day, I woke up and realized that I had to go help me uncle that day. So I lied to my mom that there was this agonizing pain on my back, and I couldn't help anymore. My mom felt really bad so she called my uncle to tell him that it was not possible for me to lend a hand anymore. About a week passed by my uncle never called back for anymore assistance, and I assumed that the house was finish. About to weeks later my aunt called my mom to break the bad news that my uncle has passed away. When my mom told me, guilt crawled up my tummy like spiders. The next day I came back to my uncle's unfinished house and clean up what was left. While cleaning up, I found an old brown envelope covered in dust lying on the floor in the attic. I opened up the envelope and saw a photograph of my uncle with couple of his friend from Boeing. I was surprised to find out that my uncle was an aerospace engineer. Some how this made me feel bitter. Feeling that I lost the chance of getting to know my uncle, I sacrifice my time to research about aerospace engineering. Somehow aerospace engineering caught my attention about what I should do in the future of my life. As of now I regret not giving up my time to help my uncle. By researching aerospace engineer, it made me feel like I am there for my uncle. All of this made me like I want to be an aerospace engineer when I grow up. As I enrich myself, it makes me feel proud inside that I am acknowledging a part of my uncle that I never let myself get to know. I know that if my uncle was still here he would also be proud of me. This experience taught me that because of my stubbornness and unwillingness to link myself to the past, I was already at a disadvantage. I missing out on so much, giving up on an enriching experiencing, and in the end, I'm left with a lifetime of regrets as well as a lesson that could not be taught. thank you a lot in advance | Personal Statement When we find a strand of hair lost from our head, we make a big fuss out of it, but when it's on our head with other hairs, we act as it is not there. Recently I lost my uncle during the summer. Because of my actions, I missed my chance of saying goodbye to my uncle and a chance to appreciate him. I was too slothful and selfish, that I refused to help my uncle in his last summer as a human being. I realize that the choices I made were erroneous. It was a hot and tiresome summer, and it was my time of the year to reward myself by relaxing and learning how to play the guitar to make up the times that I sacrificed from all my community services during the school year. Out of nowhere, a random phone call "Rigging ringing," about ten seconds later I picked up the phone, "Hello?" I asked. My uncle on the other side says "Hi Nick! Would you like to come visit me and help me around the house?" Right when I heard that, I said "No sorry uncle, I can't". Then I heard my uncle in a sad tone asking to speak to my mom, so I handed my mom the phone. They talked for about ten minutes. After that my mom forced me to go visit my uncle. So I decided to visit my uncle the next day. I had to cancel all my plans, and I knew it was going to be tedious visiting my uncle. I felt furious, and melancholy that I couldn't sleep in for the next couple of days. Next day I came to my uncle's house. His house was very hectic. Debris was all over the floor, and the house had a tick fog of chalky powder lingering around the living room. I knew that there was a bountiful of work to do. His house was far from finish. As I entered the house, I thought I was in hell. I was suffocating by the thick fog that the house created. It was hot, and it gave me an uneasy feeling. All of this unpleasantness drew my curiosity to ask my uncle what happened to his house, and he responded "I'm fixing my house, making it newer." I thought that his house would never finish without helpers. First we started from the bathroom, the room reeks so badly that I had to wear a mask. It took me about five minutes for my back to soak in sweat. It was hard work, and I knew that I could not work under this unpleasant environment. After about an hour I decided to leave. Before I left, I made a lie to my uncle that I have to go help my mom. Leaving the house of chaos made me feel alleviated. Quickly I ran to my car and drove to my friend's house. I didn't have any guilt leaving my uncle, I was actually relieved and delighted that I left his house. The second day, I woke up and realized that I had to go help me uncle that day. So I lied to my mom that there was this agonizing pain on my back, and I couldn't help anymore. My mom felt awful, so she called my uncle to tell him that it was not possible for me to lend a hand anymore. About a week passed by my uncle never called back for any more assistance, and I assumed that the house was finish. About to weeks later my aunt called my mom to break the bad news that my uncle has passed away. When my mom told me, guilt crawled up my tummy like spiders. The next day I came back to my uncle's unfinished house and clean up what was left. While cleaning up, I found an old brown envelope covered in dust lying on the floor in the attic. I opened up the envelope and saw a photograph of my uncle with a couple of his friend from Boeing. I was surprised to find out that my uncle was an aerospace engineer. Somehow this made me feel bitter. Feeling that I lost the chance of getting to know my uncle, I sacrifice my time to research about aerospace engineering. Somehow aerospace engineering caught my attention about what I should do in the future of my life. As of now I regret not giving up my time to help my uncle. By researching aerospace engineer, it made me feel like I am there for my uncle. All of this made me like I want to be an aerospace engineer when I grow up. As I enrich myself, it makes me feel proud inside that I am acknowledging a part of my uncle that I never let myself get to know. I know that if my uncle was still here he would also be proud of me. This experience taught me that because of my stubbornness and unwillingness to link myself to the past, I was already at a disadvantage. I'm missing out on so much, giving up on an enriching experiencing, and in the end, I'm left with a lifetime of regrets as well as a lesson that could not be taught. Thank you a lot in advance |
Sitting here and writing this paper, I have been thinking about my youth, all the way back to the time I first came to the United States of America. I and my family have been here for four years and we have had a tough time dealing with our new lives. My mother and father have only a high school education level and I had barely finished my seventh grade. No one in our family could either speak or understand English so that had become one of our biggest obstacles. The first year in the United States was the most challenging year for our family. My parents had worked like machines and did everything that they could do to survive in this new land. Therefore, I promised myself that I would do my best in school and propel my potential to its zenith so that I could fulfill my parents' efforts. I started simultaneously taking many English courses and higher level exams to qualify for AP classes in my school. This helped me achieving more advanced education standard to be qualified for universities. I have worked like a bee to compete with all kinds of people in this mean and inequitable world. Sometimes I felt exhausted, but in my mind, I never failed to embrace my dream. Some of my friends asked me, "What are you trying so hard for? You know that you have no chance to compete with the students that live here for a long time, they have more opportunities than you and all your efforts will be wasted". I immediately responded, "I know that the result of my GPA and SAT score is not as good as others, however, unless I receive a letter of rejection from universities for some other reason, I will never let anything destroy my hope". I agree that it is hard for me but for all the effort and hard work I have done, I believe I deserve to be a student in a quality university. Now that I am a senior, I cannot believe what I have accomplished in the past three years was so successful. I want to say thank you to my family, my teacher, my school, and even counselor because they have been trying so hard to help me attaining my aspirations. | Sitting here and writing this paper, I have been thinking about my youth, all the way back to the time I first came to the United States of America. My family and I have been here for four years, and we have had a tough time dealing with our new lives. My mother and father have only a high school education level and I had barely finished my seventh grade. No one in our family could either speak or understand English so that had become one of our biggest obstacles. The first year in the United States was the most challenging year for our family. My parents had worked like machines and did everything that they could do to survive in this new land. Therefore, I promised myself that I would do my best in school and propel my potential to its zenith so that I could fulfill my parents' efforts. I started simultaneously taking many English courses and higher level exams to qualify for AP classes in my school. This helped me to achieve more advanced education standard to be qualified for universities. I have worked like a bee to compete with all kinds of people in this mean and inequitable world. Sometimes I felt exhausted, but in my mind, I never failed to embrace my dream. Some of my friends asked me, "What are you trying so hard for? You know that you have no chance to compete with the students that live here for a long time, they have more opportunities than you and all your efforts will be wasted". I immediately responded, "I know that the result of my GPA and SAT score is not as good as others, however, unless I receive a letter of rejection from universities for some other reason, I will never let anything destroy my hope". I agree that it is hard for me but for all the effort and hard work I have done, I believe I deserve to be a student in a quality university. Now that I am a senior, I cannot believe what I have accomplished in the past three years was so successful. I want to say thank you to my family, my teacher, my school, and even counselor because they have been trying so hard to help me to attain my aspirations. |
I wrote about a significant experience. This past year I have experienced a multitude of unforgettable memories. Time has been slow and haunting as if it was trying to make room for my tales to unravel. Of all the time-escaping moments the one that protrudes in my mind and life the most is the four day voyage of music, art, and camping. This music and arts festival was Bonnaroo and it changed my life. In early March of 2008 I went to my first music festival which was Langeradoo located in Big Cypress Reserve of Southern Florida. This was just a appetizer for what was to come. After Langerado I fell in love with the music festival experience, and a fellow Langerado enthusiast told me about Bonnaroo. I had to go to. I planned my trip quick for Bonnaroo was to start in the beginning of July. The plan was set, bags were packed, ticket was in hand, and it had begun. The trip up to the festival grounds in Tennessee was without incident, except for the four hour bumper to bumper line leading into the campgrounds. When we finally arrived what laid before me was awe inspiring, nearly sixty-thousand tents, six stages, and over eighty-thousand music lovers encompassing the seven hundred acre grounds, all motioned in perfect harmony. We set up camp and made our way towards the stages to experience the first act. The festival grounds was populated with people from a world unknown to me. It seemed as if every culture was represented in this one spot, and everyone showed nothing but kindness. That was the most profound thing I observed, that during those four never-ending days I heard not one word of discomfort or dislike. People were falling over each other, bumping through the crowd around the stage, but everyone was passive, even the metal heads waiting to see Metallica. The peaceful nature of the diversity made me realize that the world can be without conflict or aggression. Realized that you can get away from the world and its hardships if just for one weekend. Those four days will always be the memories I strive to recapture. Now I no longer wonder what mankind can create other than destruction. Bonnaroo has told me of our capabilities, we just need to find the right beat. Any notes would help... Thanks! | I wrote about a significant experience. This past year I have experienced a multitude of unforgettable memories. Time has been slow and haunting as if it was trying to make room for my tales to unravel. Of all the time-escaping moments the one that protrudes in my mind and life the most is the four-day voyage of music, art, and camping. This music and arts festival was Ontario, and it changed my life. In early March 2008 I went to my first music festival which was Langeradoo located in Big Cypress Reserve of Southern Florida. This was just an appetizer for what was to come. After Angered I fell in love with the music festival experience, and a fellow Angered enthusiast told me about Ontario. I had to go to. I planned my trip quick for Ontario was to start in the beginning of July. The plan was set, bags were packed, ticket was in hand, and it had begun. The trip up to the festival grounds in Tennessee was without incident, except for the four-hour bumper to bumper line leading into the campgrounds. When we finally arrived what laid before me was awe-inspiring, nearly sixty-thousand tents, six stages, and over eighty-thousand music lovers encompassing the seven hundred acre grounds, all motioned in perfect harmony. We set up camp and made our way towards the stages to experience the first act. The festival grounds was populated with people from a world unknown to me. It seemed as if every culture was represented in this one spot, and everyone showed nothing but kindness. That was the most profound thing I observed, that during those four never-ending days I heard not one word of discomfort or dislike. People were falling over each other, bumping through the crowd around the stage, but everyone was passive, even the metal heads waiting to see Metallica. The peaceful nature of the diversity made me realize that the world can be without conflict or aggression. Realized that you can get away from the world and its hardships if just for one weekend. Those four days will always be the memories I strive to recapture. Now I no longer wonder what mankind can create other than destruction. Ontario has told me of our capabilities, we just need to find the right beat. Any notes would help... Thanks! |
"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up their wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." - Bible, Isaiah 40:31. Never have I been ashamed to say that I continuously depend on God, from which all of my health and strength comes from. Not only that, but I am well aware that if it was not for the Lord and his sweet grace, I would not be here today enraptured in the many blessings He has bestowed upon me. I realize that every breath is a gift from God that should not be expected nor demanded but received out of appreciation and gratitude. It is my duty as a young, black, Christian, female to set the par for others, and to be a leading example to those who are lost in the world, looking for a way, but also to show 3-dimensional strength. I believe that my life completely embodies the definition of vires in its intellectual, moral and physical aspects. Not only is this strength of all kinds part of Florida Sate University's guiding philosophy but it is part of the philosophy which I choose to uplift and value in all aspects of my life. It is not that I believe that vires describes me but better yet, that I define the word vires. "A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult. It's complicated by the fact that in most nations, women receive substantially less education than men" -Melinda Gates. Living in this world is becoming increasingly challenging. As the amount of job and education opportunities decreases, the cost of living increases. Violence, corruption, and moral deterioration surround our everyday lives and occur in various situations daily. With the depletion of our economy and the encompassing of moral decay it takes Vires to overcome and strive for success day after day. Aside from that, the temptation to conform presents itself to my life constantly. Not a day goes by without a temptation being placed upon my moral strength to give in to the ideas and actions of this world and its dismay. As Melinda Gates states, the road to finding that voice of strength and sound foundation is not easy, but I'm more than willing to endure and achieve it. Many would say that I have two strikes against me because I am black and a female, but I look at my circumstance as a challenge. It is a challenge to rise above, regardless of the labels that have been placed upon me and to succeed just as anyone else. I close with this quote, from one of my greatest sources of inspiration and a woman whom I look up to greatly. "It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from. The ability to triumph begins with you always"-Oprah Winfrey. I will not only continue my desire to be hungry for knowledge and success but strive to learn, experience and conquer always, letting nothing cause my strength to become broken. | "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up their wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." - Bible, Isaiah 40:31. Never have I been ashamed to say that I continuously depend on God, from which all of my health and strength comes from. Not only that, but I am well aware that if it was not for the Lord and his sweet grace, I would not be here today enraptured in the many blessings He has bestowed upon me. I realize that every breath is a gift from God that should not be expected nor demanded but received out of appreciation and gratitude. It is my duty as a young, black, Christian, female to set the par for others, and to be a leading example to those who are lost in the world, looking for a way, but also to show 3-dimensional strength. I believe that my life completely embodies the definition of virus in its intellectual, moral and physical aspects. Not only is this strength of all kinds part of Florida Sate University's guiding philosophy, but it is part of the philosophy which I choose to uplift and value in all aspects of my life. It is not that I believe that virus describes me but better yet, that I define the word virus. "A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult. It's complicated by the fact that in most nations, women receive substantially less education than men" -Melinda Gates. Living in this world is becoming increasingly challenging. As the amount of job and education opportunities decreases, the cost of living increases. Violence, corruption, and moral deterioration surround our everyday lives and occur in various situations daily. With the depletion of our economy and the encompassing of moral decay it takes Virus to overcome and strive for success day after day. Aside from that, the temptation to conform presents itself to my life constantly. Not a day goes by without a temptation being placed upon my moral strength to give in to the ideas and actions of this world and its dismay. As Melinda Gates states, the road to finding that voice of strength and sound foundation is not easy, but I'm more than willing to endure and achieve it. Many would say that I have two strikes against me because I am black and a female, but I look at my circumstance as a challenge. It is a challenge to rise above, regardless of the labels that have been placed upon me and to succeed just as anyone else. I close with this quote, from one of my greatest sources of inspiration and a woman whom I look up to greatly. "It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from. The ability to triumph begins with you always"-Oprah Winfrey. I will not only continue my desire to be hungry for knowledge and success but strive to learn, experience and always conquer, letting nothing cause my strength to become broken. |
Essay: Everyone has certain dreams they replay in their minds over and over again, and I am certainly no different. Often, I would catch myself teleporting mentally to a different world, the Penn World. I imagine walking upon Locust Walk, arching over the city's busy pool of track, yet simultaeneously charmed head over heels by the well grown oaks, ___, ____ trees that sway romantically with the seasonal breezes. It is truly an incredible feeling to be standing atop a metropolitan and traditional city environment while being surrounded by a small-town atmosphere that most characterizes Penn. As I make my way past the John Huntsman building, I notice the hurrying students; despite their rush, they would still acknowledge my presence with a smile. It is difficult to imagine myself selecting one concentration among the many topics within the Wharton program, as I find myself attracted to several of the listed fields. One of which is the study of Finance. Through interning at AXA-Financial-Advisors, I have not only learned much of the real-world practice of investment stradegies, but also confirmed my strong interest in finance. I simply cannot wait to utilize my work experience to understand more about the world of finance and what can be done admist of this economic crisis America is in currently. As an addition to the Finance concentration, I also would love to choose my 2nd concentration in Global Analysis. Due to my background and interest in asian cultures, I plan to focus not only on the domestic field of finance but also the international perspective. Finally, Marketing and Communication is another dual field I find myself quite drawn toward and am confident in that my outgoing personality and articulate speaking skills will aid me in promoting promoting products effectively. Above all however, I would have to admit that the study abroad program at Wharton was what attracted me the most. Unlike most undergraduate intstitutions, Penn's having an undergraduate business focus allows it to have abroad programs specifically designed for prospective business students. Moreover, its multiple locations in Beijing and Hong Kong, China are especially convenient for me to maximize the use of my fluency in Chinese and its culture. My worldliness will also aid in making my transition between the two worlds so that I will be having the "time of my life". The Wharton Undergraduate Finance Club is one that I plan to engage on a frequent basis. Throughout the first few weeks at Penn, I envision myself attending "Finance 101". I will listen intently as presentations on basic finance terms are presented. My mind will be nourished with information of "private equity", "venture capital", and much more financial terms I have heard during the short time at Wharton. Later through the year, I will compete in "Case Competitions" with my intercollegiate peers to demonstrate the financial knowledge I would have learned from the freshman curriculum of my Wharton education. Aside from stepping in and out of W.U.F.C, I also see myself in the Wharton China Association. Facillitated by my Chinese heritage as well as the 11 years I have spent in Beijing, I plan to become more than just a member of this association, but rather take on leadership through contacting speakers from Chinese firms, communicating ideas between the Wharton students and leaders in those Chinese firms, and much more. The social environment at University of Pennsylvania is also one of its most appealing factors to me. With a great school spirit and a relatively medium class size, Penn embodies the ideal location to have the college experience of a lifetime. Its scholastic blend with its emphasize of students' social networking experience combine to make Penn the ultimate place to maximize one's academic and social capacity. I picture myself enriching this experience by joining the Penn Symphony Orchestra, utilizing my nine years in orchestra to further my musical contribution to Penn. I also envision meeting enthusiastic new people on the Give a Toast to Penn event, and immersing myself in the passionate spirit of my top choice university. As I snap back into reality, I take the time to savor my walk through life at UPENN. While I realize that I might ultimately not live out this dream, I am grateful already for simply enjoying myself imaginarily. However, everyone wouldn't mind their dream becoming reality, and I am certainly no exception. So University of Pennsylvania, will you be my dream come true? | Essay: Everyone has certain dreams they replay in their minds over and over again, and I am certainly no different. Often, I would catch myself teleporting mentally to a different world, the Penn World. I imagine walking upon Locust Walk, arching over the city's busy pool of track, yet simultaneously charmed head over heels by the well grown oaks, ___, ____ trees that sway romantically with the seasonal breezes. It is truly an incredible feeling to be standing atop a metropolitan and traditional city environment while being surrounded by a small-town atmosphere that most characterizes Penn. As I make my way past the John Huntsman building, I notice the hurrying students; despite their rush, they would still acknowledge my presence with a smile. It is difficult to imagine myself selecting one concentration among the many topics within the Wharton program, as I find myself attracted to several of the listed fields. One of which is the study of Finance. Through interning at AXA-Financial-Advisors, I have not only learned much of the real-world practice of investment strategies, but also confirmed my strong interest in finance. I simply cannot wait to utilize my work experience to understand more about the world of finance and what can be done admit of this economic crisis America is in currently. As an addition to the Finance concentration, I also would love to choose my 2nd concentration in Global Analysis. Due to my background and interest in Asian cultures, I plan to focus not only on the domestic field of finance but also the international perspective. Finally, Marketing and Communication is another dual field I find myself quite drawn toward and am confident in that my outgoing personality and articulate speaking skills will aid me in promoting products effectively. Above all however, I would have to admit that the study abroad program at Wharton was what attracted me the most. Unlike most undergraduate institutions, Penn's having an undergraduate business focus allows it to have abroad programs specifically designed for prospective business students. Moreover, its multiple locations in Beijing and Hong Kong, China are especially convenient for me to maximize the use of my fluency in Chinese and its culture. My worldliness will also aid in making my transition between the two worlds so that I will be having the "time of my life". The Wharton Undergraduate Finance Club is one that I plan to engage on a frequent basis. Throughout the first few weeks at Penn, I envision myself attending "Finance 101". I will listen intently as presentations on basic finance terms are presented. My mind will be nourished with information of "private equity", "venture capital", and much more financial terms I have heard during the short time at Wharton. Later through the year, I will compete in "Case Competitions" with my intercollegiate peers to demonstrate the financial knowledge I would have learned from the freshman curriculum of my Wharton education. Aside from stepping in and out of W.U.F.C, I also see myself in the Wharton China Association. Facilitated by my Chinese heritage as well as the 11 years I have spent in Beijing, I plan to become more than just a member of this association, but rather take on leadership through contacting speakers from Chinese firms, communicating ideas between the Wharton students and leaders in those Chinese firms, and much more. The social environment at University of Pennsylvania is also one of its most appealing factors to me. With a great school spirit and a relatively medium class size, Penn embodies the ideal location to have the college experience of a lifetime. Its scholastic blend with its emphasis of students' social networking experience combine to make Penn the ultimate place to maximize one's academic and social capacity. I picture myself enriching this experience by joining the Penn Symphony Orchestra, utilizing my nine years in orchestra to further my musical contribution to Penn. I also envision meeting enthusiastic new people on the Give a Toast to Penn event, and immersing myself in the passionate spirit of my top choice university. As I snap back into reality, I take the time to savor my walk through life at PENN. While I realize that I might ultimately not live out this dream, I am grateful already for simply enjoying myself imaginary. However, everyone wouldn't mind their dream becoming reality, and I am certainly no exception. So University of Pennsylvania, will you be my dream come true? |
Splint your partner across from you, then form an elbow mold for the student to your right, and finally cast the forearm of the colleague sitting diagonally from you. Splinting, molding, and casting, along with an explanation about Orthopedics and reading X-Rays all studied and observed in just one of the many eventful days at Mini-Medical School. A series of lessons intrigued and invigorated every students desire to further pursue the medical field. Knowing, the incomprehensibility of teaching years of biology, chemistry, histology and the rest, just being exposed to and shown what there was still to learn, left me fascinated and intrigued. My ever present interest in Medicine was only questioned by my lack of knowledge, "What could I really be doing in the future?" It felt as though I had finally answered that question. | Splint your partner across from you, then form an elbow mold for the student to your right, and finally cast the forearm of the colleague sitting diagonally from you. Splinting, molding, and casting, along with an explanation about Orthopedics and reading X-Rays all studied and observed in just one of the many eventful days at Mini-Medical School. A series of lessons intrigued and invigorated all students desire to further pursue the medical field. Knowing, the incomprehensibility of teaching years of biology, chemistry, histology and the rest, just being exposed to and shown what there was still to learn, left me fascinated and intrigued. My ever present interest in Medicine was only questioned by my lack of knowledge, "What could I really be doing in the future?" It felt as though I had finally answered that question. |
When I was ten years old, I took part in my first host of school festival. I somehow was chosen by our activity instructor to host the May Day Art Festival. To everyone's surprise, I pulled out an "A" time. I furthered my achievements by hosting all kinds of school activities, competitions, and radio broadcasting. I wanted to win in contests and yearned for getting better and better to a top hostess. Thus started another workout. I spent hours in specialized speech training, communication with audience, emergency-dealing ability and cooperation with partners. In addition, each new level brought extra requirements such as weekend training sessions, competitions with other hosts, shows in other schools and more travel from home. Time with friends is increasingly spent in the pursuit of the upper grade. Sometimes, in the solitude of recite speeches, my thoughts transited to events in my personal life. My uncle has undergone successful stomach cancer surgery, but we were aware that a full recovery was not guaranteed. When I first learned that Uncle were struck with cancer, I felt as if my objective, to beat other hosts and become the best, seemed irrelevant, even ironic, given the urgency of their mutual goals: to prolong life itself. Yet my family has learned to draw on each other's strengths for support-their fortitude helped me overcome my struggles while watching me hosting a performance provided them with a vicarious sense of victory. When I shared my latest progress, they smiled with pride. My uncle's strength has shored up my determination to succeed. I have learned that, as in hosting, life's successes often come in small difference. Sometimes even a humor to active the atmosphere separates a great result from a failure. The difference between success and failure is defined by the ability to overcome strong internal resistance. I know that, by constantly working towards my goals, I can keep the journey of hosting and accomplish what I set for myself, both on and beyond the stage. | When I was ten years old, I took part in my first host of school festival. I somehow was chosen by our activity instructor to host the May Day Art Festival. To everyone's surprise, I pulled out an "A" time. I furthered my achievements by hosting all kinds of school activities, competitions, and radio broadcasting. I wanted to win in contests and yearned for getting better and better to a top hostess. Thus started another workout. I spent hours in specialized speech training, communication with audience, emergency-dealing ability and cooperation with partners. In addition, each new level brought extra requirements such as weekend training sessions, competitions with other hosts, shows in other schools and more travel from home. Time with friends is increasingly spent in the pursuit of the upper grade. Sometimes, in the solitude of recite speeches, my thoughts transited to events in my personal life. My uncle has undergone successful stomach cancer surgery, but we were aware that a full recovery was not guaranteed. When I first learned that Uncle were struck with cancer, I felt as if my objective, to beat other hosts and become the best, seemed irrelevant, even ironic, given the urgency of their mutual goals: to prolong life itself. Yet my family has learned to draw on each other's strengths for support-their fortitude helped me overcome my struggles while watching me hosting a performance provided them with a vicarious sense of victory. When I shared my latest progress, they smiled with pride. My uncle's strength has shored up my determination to succeed. I have learned that, as in hosting, life's successes often come in small difference. Sometimes even a humor to activate the atmosphere separates a great result from a failure. The difference between success and failure is defined by the ability to overcome strong internal resistance. I know that, by constantly working towards my goals, I can keep the journey of hosting and accomplish what I set for myself, both on and beyond the stage. |
Each person is as unique as a fingerprint. We all have qualities, good and bad, that differ from one another. I fully intend to put forth all of my salubrious attributes towards the Florida Golf Coast community. I would contribute unique characteristics including my ability to mentor new students and to tutor underclassmen. I have thrived in a culturally diversified environment. I will use my loyalty to represent such a prestigious school in a suitable fashion. A school such as Florid Gulf Coast deserves no less. I have been a member of the Varsity Soccer and Softball teams for 4 years. I believe my participation in these sports have helped me to develop leadership, teamwork and social abilities. This experience has also helped me foster community relationships; working with Bank Atlantic Center, Beef O Brady's, and PGA Golf Club. I would like to attend Florida Gulf Coast University for several reasons: the exciting and challenging curriculum that is offered: coupled with the exciting sports curriculum. I have visited the campus on several occasions, most notably, to watch the Florida Gulf Coast Eagles softball team play. I would like the experience of living in a new city and meeting new people from all over the country. Attending Florida Gulf Coast University will expand my opportunities, challenge my mind, and offer me a great education. | Each person is as unique as a fingerprint. We all have qualities, good and bad, that differ from one another. I fully intend to put forth all of my salubrious attributes towards the Florida Gold Coast community. I would contribute unique characteristics including my ability to mentor new students and to tutor underclassmen. Furthermore, I have thrived in a culturally diversified environment. Furthermore, I will use my loyalty to represent such a prestigious school in a suitable fashion. A school such as Florid Gulf Coast deserves no less. I have been a member of the Varsity Soccer and Softball teams for 4 years. I believe my participation in these sports have helped me to develop leadership, teamwork and social abilities. This experience has also helped me foster community relationships; working with Bank Atlantic Center, Beef O Brady's, and PGA Golf Club. I would like to attend Florida Gulf Coast University for several reasons: the exciting and challenging curriculum that is offered: coupled with the exciting sports curriculum. I have visited the campus on several occasions, most notably, to watch the Florida Gulf Coast Eagles softball team play. Furthermore, I would like the experience of living in a new city and meeting new people from all over the country. Attending Florida Gulf Coast University will expand my opportunities, challenge my mind, and offer me a great education. |
I am an artist. The world is my canvas and as I paint, the mixture of diverse tones and colors on my pallet of intellect illustrate the passion within my masterpiece which is my ultimate impact on humanity. This of course, is a metaphor for my personal philosophy but although I do view life through the eyes of an artist and see my intellect as the instrument through which I will make change, on a concrete level I am a terrible a painter. In fact, my best pieces are probably a few finger painted stick figures I made in Kindergarten. Nonetheless, I am an artist in the broader interpretation of the word and although "Vires" and "Mores" are both concepts that embody my lifestyle, my life is dramatically reflected in the concept of the Latin word, "Artes". As an artist--one having superior skill or abilities to produce superior work-- Artes is a word that immediately identifies with me. From my application, transcripts, and resume it is evident that I have both the potential and reputation for producing superior work but unlike many other individuals my age, my work is a result of my passion for learning as an art or lifestyle, rather than simply completing the minimum requirements to "make the grade". The most hated class I've ever taken was world history during my sophomore year of high school but not because I disliked history or because it was my very first AP class but because it was so easy! Don't get me wrong, the course itself seemed very intense and there should have been loads of reading and studying involved in order to pass the class. However, an average class period with Mrs. Osborn consisted of dragging into class with little hope of actually learning, enduring a completely irrelevant and tedious lecture about King Ferdinand which would somehow drift into a twenty minute tangent on her planned trip to Las Vegas after she wins the lottery, and finally concluding with the disbursement of an elementary homework assignment which everyone finished before the bell rang for second period. Occasionally, she'd inject an open book quiz on homo-sapiens or a notebook check worth 50% of the class grade into her lesson plans. Although I received A's all year long and a boost in my GPA, I left the class with little more knowledge about world history than what I had went in with. Unable to endure another year of not learning history with Mrs. Osborn, I opted to take American history at a community college my junior year. Although the straight A's I toiled for weren't worth as much credit as the A's I would have received in the AP class, my craving for knowledge was nourished as I worked hard under the teachings of an experienced professor who took my education seriously and at the end of the year, the knowledge I gained was more than worth the sacrifice | I am an artist. The world is my canvas and as I paint, the mixture of diverse tones and colors on my pallet of intellect illustrate the passion within my masterpiece which is my ultimate impact on humanity. This of course, is a metaphor for my personal philosophy but although I do view life through the eyes of an artist and see my intellect as the instrument through which I will make change, on a concrete level I am a terrible a painter. In fact, my best pieces are probably a few finger painted stick figures I made in Kindergarten. Nonetheless, I am an artist in the broader interpretation of the word and although "Virus" and "Mores" are both concepts that embody my lifestyle, my life is dramatically reflected in the concept of the Latin word, "Arts". As an artist--one having superior skill or abilities to produce superior work-- Arts is a word that immediately identifies with me. From my application, transcripts, and resume it is evident that I have both the potential and reputation for producing superior work but unlike many other individuals my age, my work is a result of my passion for learning as an art or lifestyle, rather than simply completing the minimum requirements to "make the grade". The most hated class I've ever taken was world history during my sophomore year of high school but not because I disliked history or because it was my very first AP class but because it was so easy! Don't get me wrong, the course itself seemed very intense and there should have been loads of reading and studying involved in order to pass the class. However, an average class period with Mrs. Osborn consisted of dragging into class with little hope of actually learning, enduring a completely irrelevant and tedious lecture about King Ferdinand which would somehow drift into a twenty-minute tangent on her planned trip to Las Vegas after she wins the lottery, and finally concluding with the disbursement of an elementary homework assignment which everyone finished before the bell rang for second period. Occasionally, she'd inject an open book quiz on homo-sapiens or a notebook check worth 50% of the class grade into her lesson plans. Although I received A's all year long and a boost in my GPA, I left the class with little more knowledge about world history than what I had gone in with. Unable to endure another year of not learning history with Mrs. Osborn, I opted to take American history at a community college my junior year. Although the straight A's I toiled for weren't worth as much credit as the A's I would have received in the AP class, my craving for knowledge was nourished as I worked hard under the teachings of an experienced professor who took my education seriously and at the end of the year, the knowledge I gained was more than worth the sacrifice |
Along with this, I'll feel more comfortable in a classroom full of different sorts of personalities. The class will not be so boring but, alive with several qualities. It goes back to my 1st day of school at Larkdale Elementary. Kids from around the world filled Ms. Noodle's classroom. I was intimidated at first but later embraced the style they brought into the room. Being in a room with various characteristics makes the learning environment interesting. Which I know, this will happen if I am added into the Care program. The other day I was reading about the CARE program on the internet and it read that the CARE program provides some benefits. One of the benefits read "...staff and upper class students will serve as counselors and guides during the summer." This caught my attention because I will want to be cared about not nursed around like a baby. I like knowing that someone will sit down, ask questions, and be concern about me. Reminds me when, Ms. Noodles sat down with me and taught me the alphabets while the other kids laughed. Ms. Noodles cared just like the CARE program will do the same. I remember that moment as if it was yesterday. And I will like to add the CARE program journey into this memory lane. I regain all my senses as my Dad lets go of my hand. I shed a tear before he place a kiss on my forehead. I looked up and notice Ms Noodle's genuine smile. This was a new beginning an event I will never forget. I hope to experience this same feeling while I participate in the CARE program and I acquiring knowledge. | Along with this, I'll feel more comfortable in a classroom full of different sorts of personalities. The class will not be so boring but, alive with several qualities. It goes back to my 1st day of school at Lark dale Elementary. Kids from around the world filled Ms. Noodle's classroom. I was intimidated at first but later embraced the style they brought into the room. Being in a room with various characteristics makes the learning environment interesting. Which I know, this will happen if I am added into the Care program. The other day I was reading about the CARE program on the internet, and it read that the CARE program provides some benefits. One of the benefits read "...staff and upper class students will serve as counselors and guides during the summer." This caught my attention because I will want to be cared about not nursed around like a baby. I like knowing that someone will sit down, ask questions, and be concern about me. Reminds me when, Ms. Noodles sat down with me and taught me the alphabets while the other kids laughed. Ms. Noodles cared just like the CARE program will do the same. I remember that moment as if it was yesterday. And I would like to add the CARE program journey into this memory lane. I regain all my senses as my Dad lets go of my hand. I shed a tear before he places a kiss on my forehead. Furthermore, I looked up and notice Ms Noodle's genuine smile. This was a new beginning an event I will never forget. I hope to experience this same feeling while I participate in the CARE program and I are acquiring knowledge. |
"Integrity, scholarship, community, creativity, and excellence," not only do these words form the UCF creed, but they are the values that I strive to uphold daily. Many say that I have a "good" heart, which I interpret as my concern and love for others. When I enter into a new setting not only do I evaluate how I can improve myself, but how I can enhance the community around me. I desire to make a change, positively affect as many lives as possible, and create profound memories and legacies throughout my college years. I come from a family who strongly believes in education, its foundation, and the success that it leads to. As a result it has been instilled within me that it is my obligation to live up to the full extent of my potential and to hone in on the skills and blessings, which have been given to me, to become a highly successful African American female. Over time I have learned that becoming successful is a task that is entirely left up to me and has to be desired from within. Even as a toddler my parents reinforced early education. They have a desire for me to achieve and experience things that they could only dream of. The many rights that my ancestors fought and died for are the very rights that I hold in my hands today and often take for granted. It is not only my mission but my duty as a young African American female to rise to the occasion. The time is now to stop making excuses and start taking action. I have also learned to value family. No matter how hard times get or how heavy the strain that is put on our family ties, we are expected to stick together and help each other overcome. Throughout this strong family bond we have been taught the aspects of love, respect, honor, and loyalty. Most of all, we depend on God from which all of our health and strength comes from. We acknowledge the fact that if it was not for the Lord we would not be here today enraptured in the many blessings He has bestowed upon us. We all realize that every breath is a gift from God that should not be expected nor demanded but received out of appreciation and gratitude. I strive to make a make a positive impact so that I can not only uphold the morals and values that have been instilled upon me, but also to honor my family name. I realize that everything I do and say is not only a reflection of my physical family, but a reflection of my fellow spiritual family as well. It is my duty as a young, black, Christian, female to set the par for others and to be a leading example to those who are lost in the world and are looking for a way. I am more than ready to open a new chapter and set out for the college road ahead of me. | "Integrity, scholarship, community, creativity, and excellence," not only do these words form the UCF creed, but they are the values that I strive to uphold daily. Many say that I have a "good" heart, which I interpret as my concern and love for others. When I enter into a new setting not only do I evaluate how I can improve myself, but how I can enhance the surrounding community. I desire to make a change, positively affect as many lives as possible, and create profound memories and legacies throughout my college years. I come from a family who strongly believes in education, its foundation, and the success that it leads to. As a result it has been instilled within me that it is my obligation to live up to the full extent of my potential and to hone in on the skills and blessings, which have been given to me, to become a highly successful African American female. Over time, I have learned that becoming successful is a task that is entirely left up to me and has to be desired from within. Even as a toddler my parents reinforced early education. They have a desire for me to achieve and experience things that they could only dream of. The many rights that my ancestors fought and died for are the very rights that I hold in my hands today and often take for granted. It is not only my mission but my duty as a young African American female to rise to the occasion. The time is now to stop making excuses and start taking action. I have also learned to value family. No matter how hard times get or how heavy the strain that is put on our family ties, we are expected to stick together and help each other overcome. Throughout this strong family bond we have been taught the aspects of love, respect, honor, and loyalty. Most of all, we depend on God from which all of our health and strength comes from. We acknowledge the fact that if it was not for the Lord we would not be here today enraptured in the many blessings He has bestowed upon us. We all realize that every breath is a gift from God that should not be expected nor demanded but received out of appreciation and gratitude. I strive to make a positive impact so that I can not only uphold the morals and values that have been instilled upon me, but also to honor my family name. I realize that everything I do and say is not only a reflection of my physical family, but a reflection of my fellow spiritual family as well. It is my duty as a young, black, Christian, female to set the par for others and to be a leading example to those who are lost in the world and are looking for a way. I am more than ready to open a new chapter and set out for the college road ahead of me. |
"Vires, Artes, Mores" I consider the concepts of Vires and Artes are the concepts that are reflected in my life the most. Vires is strength in all endeavors and feel that I exhibit that in all I do whether it be in my studies at school where even though I had a very rocky start my freshman year or at home where I am the oldest of three sons and my mother is a single parent so that I have to strive for excellence and be a positive role model for my younger brothers. And even on a very personal level with dealing with the cerebral palsy I was born with. Artes is also a big part of my life as well because I play a musical instrument and I love pushing my limits and trying to become better everyday. As I mentioned before, I had a rough start to my high school career. While I am not making excuses, I feel I should show enough respect to the school as a whole and allow you a little insight into what was happening in my life at this point in time. Also at the same time let you know that I have learned from every mistake and hardship I have been through. Towards the beginning of my freshman year my mother was pregnant and starting to have complications so in the midst of trying to adjust to the high school curriculum for about a month and a half I was actually living by myself and trying to cope with worrying for my mother. Some nights I would sleep in the hospital room in a chair by her side but most nights I would have to be at home by myself because I attend a magnet high school and in order to make sure I got to school everyday I would take the bus at 5:30 am to go to school a longer way than most students. So through all this regrettably my school work suffered tremendously. I am not telling you all this to make excuses just to let you know that I am using what I have been through to constantly better myself and say that I feel I would be a great addition to your community of higher learning. I am also a musician that understands hard work and much of what I have learned through my endeavors in music. To me music has taught me about perseverance, commitment, and myself. As well as what I had to endure my freshman year I was born at 29 weeks and due to this I have Cerebral Palsy. To most this seems to be an extreme disadvantage in life in general but to me this is not a disadvantage just something to use to push myself. I have always loved proving people wrong when it comes to what I can do. There is something satisfying to me about have people doubt me then being able to so them all I can achieve.[b] | "Virus, Arts, Mores" I consider the concepts of Virus and Arts are the concepts that are reflected in my life the most. Virus is strength in all endeavors and feel that I exhibit that in all I do whether it be in my studies at school where even though I had a very rocky start my freshman year or at home where I am the oldest of three sons and my mother is a single parent so that I have to strive for excellence and be a positive role model for my younger brothers. And even on a very personal level with dealing with the cerebral palsy I was born with. Arts is also a big part of my life as well because I play a musical instrument and I love pushing my limits and trying to become better every day. As I mentioned before, I had a rough start to my high school career. While I am not making excuses, I feel I should show enough respect to the school as a whole and allow you a little insight into what was happening in my life at this point in time. Also, at the same time let you know that I have learned from every mistake and hardship I have been through. Towards the beginning of my freshman year my mother was pregnant and starting to have complications so in the midst of trying to adjust to the high school curriculum for about a month and a half I was actually living by myself and trying to cope with worrying about my mother. Some nights I would sleep in the hospital room in a chair by her side but most nights I would have to be at home by myself because I attend a magnet high school and in order to make sure I got to school everyday I would take the bus at 5:30 am to go to school a longer way than most students. So through all this regrettably my school work suffered tremendously. I am not telling you all this to make excuses just to let you know that I am using what I have been through to constantly better myself and say that I feel I would be a great addition to your community of higher learning. I am also a musician that understands hard work and much of what I have learned through my endeavors in music. To me music has taught me about perseverance, commitment, and me. As well as what I had to endure my freshman year I was born at 29 weeks and due to this I have Cerebral Palsy. To most this seems to be an extreme disadvantage in life in general but to me this is not a disadvantage just something to use to push myself. I have always loved proving people wrong when it comes to what I can do. There is something satisfying to me about have people doubt me then being able to so them all I can achieve.[b] |
After that long lecture with Mrs. Steward I've made the effort to obtain better grades. Every morning before I went to school, I made a special goal to accomplish. It would either be to study a certain page, research an article pertaining to what I've learned that day, or A a quiztest. D's were turning into C's and B's. I did this alone releasing all the strength concealed from inside of me. This is where the value "Vires" is reflected in my life. It is the day I took my teacher's advice and implied a significant quote by Anatole France, "To accomplish great things we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe." I pin pointed my mistakes in school and corrected them. For example, I remember when I would be at my desk taking notes as my teacher teaches. Writing notes wouldn't make a difference unless I studied them and really understand the concepts. Studying helped, but believing in myself, having faith really motivated me to do my best. When I made A's and B's it only raised the bar high, enforcing me that anything below a "B" is unacceptable. However, it was not easy achieving my goals, because Life is unpredictable. I had to jump over the struggles. And if life felt the need to barricade me from accomplishing any of my goals, I would lift my head higher than its original level. I acquired every little pain, changing pain into strength, the strength that has enabled me to become an intellectual. To conclude, I have, accomplished great dreams, progressing in realities' pace. Looking back, I'm glad that I sat down to acknowledge valuable lessons from my Reading teacher; Mrs. Steward. | After that long lecture with Mrs. Steward I've made the effort to obtain better grades. Every morning before I went to school, I made a special goal to accomplish. It would either be to study a certain page, research an article pertaining to what I've learned that day, or A quietest. D's were turning into C's and B's. I did this alone releasing all the strength concealed from inside me. This is where the value "Virus" is reflected in my life. It is the day I took my teacher's advice and implied a significant quote by Anatole France, "To accomplish great things we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe." I pinpointed my mistakes in school and corrected them. For example, I remember when I would be at my desk taking notes as my teacher teaches. Writing notes wouldn't make a difference unless I studied them and really understand the concepts. Studying helped, but believing in myself, having faith really motivated me to do my best. When I made A's and B's it only raised the bar high, enforcing me that anything below a "B" is unacceptable. However, it was not easy achieving my goals, because Life is unpredictable. I had to jump over the struggles. And if life felt the need to barricade me from accomplishing any of my goals, I would lift my head higher than its original level. I acquired every little pain, changing pain into strength, the strength that has enabled me to become an intellectual. To conclude, I have, accomplished great dreams, progressing in realities' pace. Looking back, I'm glad that I sat down to acknowledge valuable lessons from my Reading teacher; Mrs. Steward. |
As a member of my school's varsity football team, one thing I have proven to myself is that I am comprised of "Vires", "Artes", and "Mores". The grueling practices push me to the limit in my never ending strive to become a better person, not just a better athlete. It takes more than mere athletic ability to play football, it takes character. Mirroring life, football demands focus, persistence, and as my coaches like to say: attention to detail. It's not about winning or losing, it's about keeping your head up when you're down, it's about having integrity when you're successful, it's about bettering yourself in even the smallest of ways possible, it's about "Vires, Artes, Mores". If there is one thing my coaches are known for it is constantly preaching about putting mind over matter and the pursuit of perfection. "Artes" is something I have adapted to my life academically as well as athletically, sometimes committing myself to up to twenty hours of practice a week while still maintaining my G.P.A. Although football takes up a substantial amount of my time I have continued to challenge myself academically with AP and honors courses, preparing myself for what lies ahead. At one point in my life I considered quitting football. My friends would always ask me: "If it takes up so much of your time why don't you just quit?" I could never answer them; I couldn't put my finger on it. But thinking about it now, I realize, it was because it didn't kill me. Mainly I need help extending the first and third paragraphs. Any criticism would be appreciated, thanks! | As a member of my school's varsity football team, one thing I have proven to myself is that I am comprised of "Virus", "Arts", and "Mores". The grueling practices push me to the limit in my never ending strive to become a better person, not just a better athlete. It takes more than mere athletic ability to play football, it takes character. Mirroring life, football demands focus, persistence, and as my coaches like to say: attention to detail. It's not about winning or losing, it's about keeping your head up when you're down, it's about having integrity when you're successful, it's about bettering yourself in even the smallest of ways possible, it's about "Virus, Arts, Mores". If there is one thing my coaches are known for it is constantly preaching about putting mind over matter and the pursuit of perfection. "Arts" is something I have adapted to my life academically as well as athletically, sometimes committing myself to up to twenty hours of practice a week while still maintaining my G.P.A. Although football takes up a substantial amount of my time I have continued to challenge myself academically with AP and honors courses, preparing myself for what lies ahead. At one point in my life I considered quitting football. My friends would always ask me: "If it takes up so much of your time why don't you just quit?" I could never answer them; I couldn't put my finger on it. But thinking about it now, I realize, it was because it didn't kill me. Mainly I need help extending the first and third paragraphs. Any criticism would be appreciated, thanks! |
ESSAY: "Vires, Artes, Mores" is more than just a phrase meaning strength, intellectual pursuits, and character. To me this motto represents a Florida State student who excels in all three of these aspects. In my lifetime I have learned what the true meaning of strength is and I think this trait is reflected in my motivation. Intellectual pursuit is also shown in my day to day work because I have an eye for fashion and would like to further pursue this at Florida State. And then there is Character, which to me is the most important attribute, because it defines a person, and I am often "defined" as compassionate. Motivation is something we all have, but using it is sometimes a struggle. I feel very fortunate to have motivation come so easily to me; when there is something I want I go after it. I can relate this to multiple incidents in my life. The most recent event that required my full drive was making the Varsity cheerleading squad. Although I have been cheering all my life this year would be toughest due to the fact that 80 girls were trying out, yet there were only 20 positions on the team. Throughout tryouts I stayed hopeful and put everything I had into being a Varsity cheerleader, that included; practicing every minute I had, organizing "cheer studies," in which we would practice, and hitting the gym to improve my tumbling. Now I am proud to say my motivation paid off, because being a Varsity cheerleader brought me some great memories. "Artes," for me is exemplified through a hobby of mine, and a career I dream of pursuing. This hobby is Fashion. Ever since I can remember I've had a love for clothes, whether it was playing dress up when I was Five, or picking out my friends outfits when I was seventeen, I have always had that passion for fashion. It was just recently though I realized I could design my own clothes with the help of sewing lessons. I immediately signed myself up and have been making most of my own clothes ever since, this is something that I feel requires a sense of skill and art. Compassion is something that I pride myself in, and I feel defines my character. I consider myself compassionate because I am always putting others before myself. One particular incident where my compassion was shown was last year in New York City. It was a very cold day and while walking through Time Square I spotted a homeless man with three dogs, two cats, and two rabbits by his side. I felt so sad and helpless for these animals, so I had to figure out a way to help. I figured the only thing I could do was give up the last of my "New York savings" which unfortunately was only about ten dollars, but I hope it helped him provide the animals with food and shelter. In summary, "Vires, Artes, Mores" describes most students who attend Florida State, but it's how you represent these different meanings that allow you to stand out. For me it happens to be motivation, fashion, and compassion. And i feel that with these three things I can make a difference at here at Florida State. | ESSAY: "Virus, Arts, Mores" is more than just a phrase meaning strength, intellectual pursuits, and character. To me this motto represents a Florida State student who excels in all three of these aspects. In my lifetime I have learned what the true meaning of strength is, and I think this trait is reflected in my motivation. Intellectual pursuit is also shown in my day-to-day work because I have an eye for fashion and would like to further pursue this at Florida State. And then there is Character, which to me is the most important attribute, because it defines a person, and I am often "defined" as compassionate. Motivation is something we all have, but using it is sometimes a struggle. I feel very fortunate to have motivation come so easily to me; when there is something I want I go after it. I can relate this to multiple incidents in my life. The most recent event that required my full drive was making the Varsity cheerleading squad. Although I have been cheering all my life this year would be the toughest due to the fact that 80 girls were trying out, yet there were only 20 positions on the team. Throughout tryouts, I stayed hopeful and put everything I had into being a Varsity cheerleader, that included; practicing every minute I had, organizing "cheer studies," in which we would practice, and hitting the gym to improve my tumbling. Now I am proud to say my motivation paid off, because being a Varsity cheerleader brought me some great memories. "Arts," for me is exemplified through a hobby of mine, and a career I dream of pursuing. This hobby is Fashion. Ever since I can remember I've had a love for clothes, whether it was playing dress up when I was Five, or picking out my friends outfits when I was seventeen, I have always had that passion for fashion. It was just recently though I realized I could design my own clothes with the help of sewing lessons. I immediately signed myself up and have been making most of my own clothes ever since, this is something that I feel requires a sense of skill and art. Compassion is something that I pride myself in, and I feel defines my character. I consider myself compassionate because I am always putting others before myself. One particular incident where my compassion was shown was last year in New York City. It was a very cold day and while walking through Time Square I spotted a homeless man with three dogs, two cats, and two rabbits by his side. I felt so sad and helpless for these animals, so I had to figure out a way to help. I figured the only thing I could do was give up the last of my "New York savings" which unfortunately was only about ten dollars, but I hope it helped him provide the animals with food and shelter. In summary, "Virus, Arts, Mores" describes most students who attend Florida State, but it's how you represent these different meanings that allow you to stand out. For me, it happens to be motivation, fashion, and compassion. And I feel that with these three things I can make a difference at here at Florida State. |
Vires, Artes, Mores or strength, skill, character has been the guiding philosophy behind Florida State University for over one hundred years. After researching these words I have come to understand how I value them in my life. Values are things we live by and guide our life off of. Vires and Mores are the two concepts that closely describe who I am as an individual, student and athlete. The Latin word Vires is defined as a variety of strengths such as physical, moral and intellectual. Physical strength plays a big part in my life. I have been playing soccer for the past 12 years and over these years I see my physical strength building up and becoming a stronger player. Moral strength tells a lot about a person and who they are. I stand strong as to what my moral beliefs are and know nothing can pull me from them. Intellectual strength is something I use everyday from going to school or work. You must acquire strength intellectually through education and life lessons. Mores has many different meanings. The meaning I tend to go by is character. Character separates you from other people. In my life I have never been one to want to blend in with the crowd just because they were doing something or wearing a certain type of clothes. A famous quote that I like to go by is "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". I say this quote is self explanatory, don't live your life for others, live it for yourself, show your character. To make it in today's world values and goals are a must, without them life to me would seem pointless and boring. With the guiding philosophy behind Florida State University's Latin words the school stands for you will be sure to go far in life. | Virus, Arts, Mores or strength, skill, character has been the guiding philosophy behind Florida State University for over one hundred years. After researching these words I have come to understand how I value them in my life. Values are things we live by and guide our life off of. Virus and Mores are the two concepts that closely describe who I am as an individual, student and athlete. The Latin word Virus is defined as a variety of strengths such as physical, moral and intellectual. Physical strength plays a big part in my life. I have been playing soccer for the past 12 years and over these years I see my physical strength building up and becoming a stronger player. Moral strength tells a lot about a person and who they are. I stand strong as to what my moral beliefs are and know nothing can pull me from them. Intellectual strength is something I use every day from going to school or work. You must acquire strength intellectually through education and life lessons. Mores have many meanings. The meaning I tend to go by is character. Character separates you from other people. In my life I have never been one to want to blend in with the crowd just because they were doing something or wearing a certain type of clothes. A famous quote that I like to go by is "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". I say this quote is self-explanatory, don't live your life for others, live it for yourself, show your character. To make it in today's world values and goals are a must, without them life to me would seem pointless and boring. With the guiding philosophy behind Florida State University's Latin words the school stands for you will be sure to go far in life. |
From an early stage, I have always found it an exciting exploration when learning the story behind cultural relics and considered the process of studying history as a recreational work of archaeological work. The objective existence of the absolute beauty appears almost a religion to me. Read history books just makes ma feel as if I am passing through the time tunnel back to hundreds of years ago to visit people and personally experience the development of society. Under my dad's influence, a manager with a finance and management degree, I have developed a strong interest in economics. As a young girl, it was inspirational hearing about his business ventures, and meeting the varied and interesting circle of entrepreneurs. I once read my dad's book "Principles of Economics" by N. Gregory Mankiw. It is a young and fashion teacher who sits on student's tables instead of high platforms. Mankiw uses examples like popular movie stars, sports stars, and even the controversial TV series, but enough to create the impression of economics for us. In fact, facing the analysis of the practical problems, what people use most are the concepts and theorems still in primary textbooks. Through studying this book, I fell in love with economics and finance. Unlike history, which investigate former human beings, financial analysis and economics concern more about the reasonable choices of modern people. After attending the double major program for a period of time, I would like to make a map to find out the inner links between history and economics. So I will take the advantage of excellent faculty and outstanding research sources in the College of Arts and Sciences to make some ground-breaking discoveries. | From an early stage, I have always found it an exciting exploration when learning the story behind cultural relics and considered the process of studying history as a recreational work of archaeological work. The objective existence of the absolute beauty appears almost a religion to me. Read history books just makes my feel as if I am passing through the time tunnel back to hundreds of years ago to visit people and personally experience the development of society. Under my dad's influence, a manager with a finance and management degree, I have developed a strong interest in economics. As a young girl, it was inspirational hearing about his business ventures, and meeting the varied and interesting circle of entrepreneurs. I once read my dad's book "Principles of Economics" by N. Gregory Mankind. It is a young and fashion teacher who sits on student's tables instead of high platforms. Mankind uses examples like popular movie stars, sports stars, and even the controversial TV series, but enough to create the impression of economics for us. In fact, facing the analysis of the practical problems, what people use most are the concepts and theorems still in primary textbooks. Through studying this book, I fell in love with economics and finance. Unlike history, which investigate former human beings, financial analysis and economics concern more about the reasonable choices of modern people. After attending the double major program for a period of time, I would like to make a map to find out the inner links between history and economics. So I will take the advantage of excellent faculty and outstanding research sources in the College of Arts and Sciences to make some ground-breaking discoveries. |
3.The moment I stepped onto the "Golden Knight" Palace, I knew that I wanted it to be my home for the next four years. As I traveled across Florida college campuses, none were as intriguing as the UCF campus. The campus' appearance seems like a paradise for college students. The campus is just what I dreamed of. UCF has the perfect atmosphere and it is the place that I would never want to leave. So many buildings to go to and explore. UCF is such a diverse college because over 50,000 students are attending the university. I will be able to learn different cultures during my time at UCF, and be able to learn more about the world. I know that UCF will provide me the best opportunity to expand my knowledge of accounting and give me various extra curricular activities. When I chose this college I knew this was the right decision. When my guidance counselors, teachers, and students ask me where I wanted to go, I said UCF instantly. UCF is my number one college to go to. I want to become a Golden Knight and I want to become part of the UCF community. I believe UCF is my castle and I am its knight to enjoy, to serve and to enhance my abilities to the fullest here. | 3. The moment I stepped onto the "Golden Knight" Palace, I knew that I wanted it to be my home for the next four years. As I traveled across Florida college campuses, none were as intriguing as the UCF campus. The campus' appearance seems like a paradise for college students. The campus is just what I dreamed of. UCF has the perfect atmosphere, and it is the place that I would never want to leave. So many buildings to go to and explore. UCF is such a diverse college because over 50,000 students are attending the university. I will be able to learn different cultures during my time at UCF, and be able to learn more about the world. I know that UCF will provide me the best opportunity to expand my knowledge of accounting and give me various extracurricular activities. When I chose this college I knew this was the right decision. When my guidance counselors, teachers, and students ask me where I wanted to go, I said UCF instantly. UCF is my number one college to go to. I want to become a Golden Knight and I want to become part of the UCF community. I believe UCF is my castle, and I am its knight to enjoy, to serve and to enhance my abilities to the fullest here. |
Please provide a personal statement in not more than 500 words, based on the following 2 questions:1. Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are? 2. State your reason(s) for applying to VJC (Victoria Junior College). I was wondering how i should start the essay. I know that the most vital part is the first paragraph. It is asking for many things only on the first question. Can i get advices on how to i should start and how i should i answer all those questions in the essay? Thanks. | Please provide a personal statement in not more than 500 words, based on the following 2 questions:1. Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are? 2. State your reason(s) for applying to VJC (Victoria Junior College). I was wondering how I should start the essay. I know that the most vital part is the first paragraph. It is asking for many things only on the first question. Can I get advices on how to i should start and how I should, I answer all those questions in the essay? Thanks. |
By looking at a person's values one can see how that person will live their life. If someone lives a life of procrastination, that person will not achieve his or her goals. A person's values are their core beliefs. If their core beliefs are corrupt, their journey through life will be blurred and difficult. "Vires" and "artes are two Latin words that can describe my beliefs. Vires symbolizes a variety of strengths- moral, physical, and intellectual. Having morals in my life is one of my strengths. Since I was a child, I have prioritized a list of things most important to me such as family, school, and prior obligations that I was committed to accomplishing. For example, in eighth grade, I had the chance to attend the Engineering and Manufacturing Institute of Technology program, but the high school that this program was at was out of my school zone. I would have to sacrifice attending high school with my best friends to go to a place where I did not know anyone, but this was a great opportunity that I could not relinquish to my social status. I knew I made the right decision, because for me an education is more important than a social life. I also work at improving my physical strength. I am a four-time varsity wrestler, so it is imperative that I follow a dynamic exercise schedule so that my body can perform at an optimum level. To keep up with my competition I train my body to work twice as hard and twice as long. Training like this, I am able to wrestle my opponent with an advantageous amount of energy. While I have no doubts concerning my intelligence, I do have to put forth more effort in this area than I would in my physical or moral strengths. I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder when I was nine years old, but I have never let a disability slow me down. Through persistence and commitment, I keep my G.P.A. up while enrolled in several rigorous classes such as honors and AP courses. Artes is a remarkable word; it signifies the beauty of intellectual pursuits exemplified in skills, crafts, or arts. Being in a varsity sport for so long has taught me life lessons like keeping my composure under pressure. In wrestling, you are in a battle with your opponent for six minutes. In that time, you must execute flawless skill and technique to be successful in beating your opponent. If I make mistakes in the final moments of the match I have to remain calm and collective, knowing I can make up for that loss without panicking or losing my composure. My values are important to me. The difference in peoples' morals makes us unique and outstanding, for better or worse. Without these beliefs, society would be filled with ungoverned citizens, all the same, fading into away nothingness. I refuse to fade away. I am separate from others by my values; I am unique. | By looking at a person's values one can see how that person will live their life. If someone lives a life of procrastination, that person will not achieve his or her goals. A person's values are their core beliefs. If their core beliefs are corrupt, their journey through life will be blurred and difficult. "Virus" and "arts are two Latin words that can describe my beliefs. Virus symbolizes a variety of strengths-moral, physical, and intellectual. Having morals in my life is one of my strengths. Since I was a child, I have prioritized a list of things most important to me such as family, school, and prior obligations that I was committed to accomplishing. For example, in eighth grade, I had the chance to attend the Engineering and Manufacturing Institute of Technology program, but the high school that this program was at was out of my school zone. I would have to sacrifice attending high school with my best friends to go to a place where I did not know anyone, but this was a great opportunity that I could not relinquish to my social status. I knew I made the right decision, because for me an education is more important than a social life. Furthermore, I also work at improving my physical strength. Furthermore, I am a four-time varsity wrestler, so it is imperative that I follow a dynamic exercise schedule so that my body can perform at an optimum level. To keep up with my competition I train my body to work twice as hard and twice as long. Training like this, I am able to wrestle my opponent with an advantageous amount of energy. While I have no doubts concerning my intelligence, I do have to put forth more effort in this area than I would in my physical or moral strengths. I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder when I was nine years old, but I have never let a disability slow me down. Through persistence and commitment, I keep my G.P.A. up while enrolled in several rigorous classes such as honors and AP courses. Arts is a remarkable word; it signifies the beauty of intellectual pursuits exemplified in skills, crafts, or arts. Being in a varsity sport for so long has taught me life lessons like keeping my composure under pressure. In wrestling, you are in a battle with your opponent for six minutes. In that time, you must execute flawless skill and technique to be successful in beating your opponent. If I make mistakes in the final moments of the match I have to remain calm and collective, knowing I can make up for that loss without panicking or losing my composure. My values are important to me. The difference in peoples' morals makes us unique and outstanding, for better or worse. Without these beliefs, society would be filled with ungoverned citizens, all the same, fading into away nothingness. I refuse to fade away. I am separate from others by my values; I am unique. |
I have never been picked first in football. I have a total of four career points in my middle-school basketball career. I have never played in the championship game. However, that has not prevented me from participating in athletics today. At Loyola Blakefield, I have been a member of the basketball team for the past three years, serving as team manager and writing as a journalism intern for Digital Sports, a high school sports-specific website. Sports have always been my passion. The problem is that I am not blessed with the athletic traits that many of my friends possess. But I have worked just as hard as the several Division I-bound athletes in my grade; I manage the team or write the story of the game. I have always been an avid viewer of ESPN and other sports programs. While my friends were outside playing, I was inside watching the game. I analyze the entire scenario like both a coach and player. A person on the sideline notices things from a broader perspective. I would impress my friends with knowledge of sports statistics just as they impressed me with their athletic talent. They can ask me anything: where a specific athlete went to college, how many different teams a head coach had coached for, or how many runs batted in did one athlete have in the month of July. I have been credited as "knowing too much." I take that as a compliment. Freshman year, I tried out for the freshman basketball team on the first day, only to realize how out-of-shape and talentless that I was. The next day I didn't show up for try-outs. Instead, I went into the head coach's office. He told me that there was a managing position. I accepted eagerly. From that moment on, I would be the manager. Whether it was wiping the floor down before practice, filling up water bottles for the players, keeping statistics, or making copies of rosters, I was pleased to do it. Additionally, I have built many of my closest relationships through basketball and my journalism ventures. A good portion of them are athletes at my school and other schools that participate in the same conference. They know who I am, and whenever an athlete wants a story done about their commitment to a specific college, they come find me. I have been fortunate enough to deliver news of several athletes who will play in college. One memorable story was on Justin McCoy, a basketball player, who would follow in his father's footsteps and play collegiately at Coppin State University. In addition, I have also written over thirty game stories. Of the thirteen players on my eighth grade basketball team, only two are still involved with basketball. One plays varsity for his high school, while I manage Loyola's varsity. I touched the floor two minutes a game in the eighth grade, and I now manage. Had it not been for my coaches, I wouldn't have had the chance to be involved in managing or writing for a local publication. Without the inspiration of the athletes and coaches I grew up watching, I would have never been able to feel this thrill. Sports have opened up so many doors for me in my brief seventeen years. Once I enter a university, I will expect to continue my endeavors in sports. The world of sports is vast, and my name will hopefully forever be attached to it. | I have never been picked first in football. I have a total of four career points in my middle-school basketball career. Furthermore, I have never played in the championship game. However, that has not prevented me from participating in athletics today. At Loyola Blake field, I have been a member of the basketball team for the past three years, serving as team manager and writing as a journalism intern for Digital Sports, a high school sports-specific website. Sports have always been my passion. The problem is that I am not blessed with the athletic traits that many of my friends possess. But I have worked just as hard as the several Division I-bound athletes in my grade; I manage the team or write the story of the game. I have always been an avid viewer of ESPN and other sports programs. While my friends were outside playing, I was inside watching the game. I analyze the entire scenario like both a coach and player. A person on the sideline notices things from a broader perspective. I would impress my friends with knowledge of sports statistics just as they impressed me with their athletic talent. They can ask me anything: where a specific athlete went to college, how many teams a head coach had coached for, or how many runs batted in did one athlete have in the month of July. I have been credited as "knowing too much." I take that as a compliment. Freshman year, I tried out for the freshman basketball team on the first day, only to realize how out-of-shape and talentless that I was. The next day I didn't show up for try-outs. Instead, I went into the head coach's office. He told me that there was a managing position. I accepted eagerly. From that moment on, I would be the manager. Whether it was wiping the floor down before practice, filling up water bottles for the players, keeping statistics, or making copies of rosters, I was pleased to do it. Additionally, I have built many of my closest relationships through basketball and my journalism ventures. A good portion of them are athletes at my school and other schools that participate in the same conference. They know who I am, and whenever an athlete wants a story done about their commitment to a specific college, they come find me. I have been fortunate enough to deliver news of several athletes who will play in college. One memorable story was on Justin McCoy, a basketball player, who would follow in his father's footsteps and play collegiate at Copping State University. In addition, I have also written over thirty game stories. Of the thirteen players on my eighth grade basketball team, only two are still involved with basketball. One plays varsity for his high school, while I manage Loyola's varsity. I touched the floor two minutes a game in the eighth grade, and I now manage. Had it not been for my coaches, I wouldn't have had the chance to be involved in managing or writing for a local publication. Without the inspiration of the athletes and coaches I grew up watching, I would have never been able to feel this thrill. Sports have opened up so many doors for me in my brief seventeen years. Once I enter a university, I will expect to continue my endeavors in sports. The world of sports is vast, and my name will hopefully forever be attached to it. |
2. How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?4. What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community? UCF essay on #2 and #4 I combined both into this essay. This is my daynight for working on college essays :) I appreciate your input! I like to think that the apple does not fall far from the tree, when I think about who I am. I am fortunate to have a family that has strong values and beliefs and has given me unconditional love. I have grown up in a family where the philosophy is to give to others and do for others. Fifty plus years ago, my mother's great aunt, whom I am told, had no more than two nickels to rub together, made it her mission to help less fortunate children. Today, because of her hard work and efforts there is a center that serves the needs of children and adults in South Florida that have severe as well as multiple developmental disabilities. When she left this world, she left without any monetary value, but instead with love and knowing that she had enriched so many people's lives. My father as a young man started a program to assist mentally aphasic individuals in providing them job opportunities. As life would have it, my parent's paths led them together and today, they continue to serve the less fortunate whether it is with underprivileged children or children that have cancer, or multiple developmental disabilities. Giving up many weekends and holidays, my parents receive more joy in life by doing for others. As a first grader my parents signed me up to join cub scouts since they believed in the values that scouting taught. Twelve years later, trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courtesy, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent, the Boy Scout law are characteristics that I now possess. By being part of the boy scout organization and in working towards my Eagle, my experiences have helped mold me into the person I am today. Whether it is working with children with cancer in a hospital environment, walking to raise funds for the cure of cancer, feeding the homeless, or helping a community organization through various service projects, I have gained valuable lessons from every experience. These experiences have forever changed me and I look at life from a different perspective. Earning a degree from the University of Central Florida would be a great accomplishment in my life and I realize that it will require determination and perseverance. I am ready for the challenge. I have learned to take advantage of every opportunity afforded to me, and my college experience will be no exception. My experiences with the less fortunate have taught me to continuously push myself because I respect the fact that the opportunities I have been afforded are a blessing and that my potential is limitless. From my family and through my own experiences I have learned the importance of giving back to others and the community. I will continue to give back to the Central Florida community as a student of the university and as a person of virtue. I will use my education to not only better myself, but also to further help others. As Herbert Spencer once said, "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." | 2. How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?4. What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community? UCF essay on #2 and #4 I combined both into this essay. This is my daylight for working on college essays :) I appreciate your input! I like to think that the apple does not fall far from the tree, when I think about who I am. I am fortunate to have a family that has strong values and beliefs and has given me unconditional love. Furthermore, I have grown up in a family where the philosophy is to give to others and do for others. Fifty plus years ago, my mother's great aunt, whom I am told, had no more than two nickels to rub together, made it her mission to help less fortunate children. Today, because of her hard work and efforts there is a center that serves the needs of children and adults in South Florida that have severe as well as multiple developmental disabilities. When she left this world, she left without any monetary value, but instead with love and knowing that she had enriched so many people's lives. My father as a young man started a program to assist mentally aphasic individuals in providing them job opportunities. As life would have it, my parent's paths led them together and today, they continue to serve the less fortunate whether it is with underprivileged children or children that have cancer, or multiple developmental disabilities. Giving up many weekends and holidays, my parents receive more joy in life by doing for others. As a first-grader my parents signed me up to join cub scouts since they believed in the values that scouting taught. Twelve years later, trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courtesy, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent, the Boy Scout law are characteristics that I now possess. By being part of the boy scout organization and in working towards my Eagle, my experiences have helped mold me into the person I am today. Whether it is working with children with cancer in a hospital environment, walking to raise funds for the cure of cancer, feeding the homeless, or helping a community organization through various service projects, I have gained valuable lessons from every experience. These experiences have forever changed me and I look at life from a different perspective. Earning a degree from the University of Central Florida would be a great accomplishment in my life and I realize that it will require determination and perseverance. I am ready for the challenge. I have learned to take advantage of every opportunity afforded to me, and my college experience will be no exception. My experiences with the less fortunate have taught me to continuously push myself because I respect the fact that the opportunities I have been afforded are a blessing and that my potential is limitless. From my family and through my own experiences I have learned the importance of giving back to others and the community. I will continue to give back to the Central Florida community as a student of the university and as a person of virtue. I will use my education to not only better myself, but also to further help others. As Herbert Spencer once said, "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." |
Vires signifying strength is reflected in my life in various ways. Academically I am very strong in the area of mathematics and enjoy business as well as economics. This strength has allowed me have a better understanding of the challenges our society and economy is facing in these troubled times. Physical strength, an attribute I have acquired through my hard work and dedication to wrestling. As a member of the variety wrestling team, I have challenged myself and pushed myself to maintain the level of strength needed to endure the trying matches. Morality, a code of conduct in the teaching of right and wrong is a value I learned early in light and have continued to learn through my schooling as well as by being a Boy Scout. Part of the Boy Scout law, "To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight", is something I recite every week and believe in. Artes, exemplified by my artistic skill and creativity gives me an avenue to express myself. Utilizing my artistic skill I have shared my creativity in designing a wall with inspirational art at a center for children and adults with severe and multiple developmental disabilities. Mores referring to character, custom or tradition is an important part of my life as well as my families. For the past 12 years, I have been involved with various organizations, which has been instrumental in forming my character as it is today. As a Life Scout in the Boy Scouts of America, I am currently working on my Eagle Project so that by December I will be awarded with the great honor and distinction of being an Eagle Scout. My Eagle project, along with other projects that I have been involved with in helping those less fortunate has helped me realize how fortunate I am. I have been blessed with a family that has had a history of working with those less fortunate and has always engaged me. These events, like feeding the homeless, working with cancer patients, or assisting those with mental or physical challenges has now become a custom and a tradition with my family. As it has been passed down to me through many generations, I plan to instill these same values to my family and future generations. Attending Florida State and receiving a higher education has always been a goal of mine. By following the guiding philosophy of Florida State University, I have overcome obstacles and preserved, and by continuing to follow this philosophy, I know that I can obtain the goals I set for myself. | Virus signifying strength is reflected in my life in various ways. Academically I am very strong in the area of mathematics and enjoy business as well as economics. This strength has allowed me to have a better understanding of the challenges our society and economy is facing in these troubled times. Physical strength, an attribute I have acquired through my hard work and dedication to wrestling. As a member of the variety wrestling team, I have challenged myself and pushed myself to maintain the level of strength needed to endure the trying matches. Morality, a code of conduct in the teaching of right and wrong is a value I learned early in light and have continued to learn through my schooling as well as by being a Boy Scout. Part of the Boy Scout law, "To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight", is something I recite every week and believe in. Arts, exemplified by my artistic skill and creativity gives me an avenue to express myself. Utilizing my artistic skill I have shared my creativity in designing a wall with inspirational art at a center for children and adults with severe and multiple developmental disabilities. Mores referring to character, custom or tradition is an important part of my life as well as my families. For the past 12 years, I have been involved with various organizations, which has been instrumental in forming my character as it is today. As a Life Scout in the Boy Scouts of America, I am currently working on my Eagle Project so that by December I will be awarded with the great honor and distinction of being an Eagle Scout. My Eagle project, along with other projects that I have been involved with in helping those less fortunate has helped me realize how fortunate I am. I have been blessed with a family that has had a history of working with those less fortunate and has always engaged me. These events, like feeding the homeless, working with cancer patients, or assisting those with mental or physical challenges has now become a custom and a tradition with my family. As it has been passed down to me through many generations, I plan to instill these same values to my family and future generations. Attending Florida State and receiving a higher education has always been a goal of mine. By following the guiding philosophy of Florida State University, I have overcome obstacles and preserved, and by continuing to follow this philosophy, I know that I can obtain the goals I set for myself. |
___________________________________________________ Why did you choose to apply to UCF? I have been thinking hard about life after high school since ninth grade. I knew I would be going to college as this subject was not even a question in the minds of my parents and I. Naturally, I was attracted to all Florida schools since I could still be close to home and receive a scholastic scholarship compliments of Florida Bright Futures. However, there are several Florida schools where I could get a college education. I thought long and hard about where I want to spend the following 4 or more years of my life after high school and decided that the University of Central Florida would be a great fit. The thing about UCF that I find most appealing is the academic part of the school. I received a brochure in the mail about a week ago from UCF and read it over thoroughly. I was very pleased to see the low studentfaculty ratio and the number of majors offered at UCF. There is something for everyone. Though, the most attractive part I read about was the UCF College of Medicine that is opening soon. I have been in health science classes and anatomy classes in high school and I am really considering pursuing a career in the medical field. My ultimate goal is to become a medical doctor. There would be nothing better than to study pre-medicine at UCF and then have a chance to continue my medical education at the same institution I have been at for the past four years! Although academics is the most important thing I consider in a college, I also consider the location of an institution. Location is a very important factor to me. I do not want to attend a school more than 4 hours away from home. A trip to UCF from Vero Beach is less than half that time. Location is also important in an institution because of its surroundings. Orlando would definitely be a great place to live for four years with so much to do there. Additionally, I am going to need a job to sustain myself while away from home and I should have no problem finding one in a place like Orlando! Even after considering the academics, majors, and the location, there are even more factors that play a role in choosing where I apply. One of those are the opinions of current and past students of UCF. I have several friends who either currently attend or have attended UCF and I spoke with each one regarding my decision to apply. They all encouraged me to do so explaining that they would not have chosen to go anywhere else. One student I talked to earned a perfect score on his SAT, had flawless grades, and could have gone virtually anywhere he wanted. He chose to go to UCF and never regretted that decision. I was very impressed by that story. Another attractive thing about UCF is its athletics. I have played hockey all my life and was glad to find out that UCF has a club ice hockey team. Hockey is not a vital necessity at college but I love it so much that it is definitely a great bonus! I also love to watch sports, especially football. I follow the UCF Knights football team and would love to be a part of the experience I watch unfold on Saturdays at the stadium! There are several options for Florida students looking to get a quality college education after high school. Each student has their own preferences for majors offered, location, size, athletics, etc... When considering all these factors in choosing my school, the University of Central Florida is surely an attractive option! ___________________________________________ What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community? Every student brings something different to colleges. Diversity is essential to everything. My family would be boring if we all had the same personalities. My school would be boring if everybody was an eighteen-year old Caucasian male who enjoyed sports and spending time with friends and family. Everything is always better with different varieties of people, it just spices things up. The same is true for colleges and universities, diversity makes the college experience that everybody enjoys so much. Every single student brings something different to the school. I believe that I possess several important qualities that will enable me to make a great contribution to the University of Central Florida in and out of the classroom. I have been playing ice hockey for thirteen years now. Sure, I improved my skating skills, shooting skills, and passing abilities every year. More importantly, though, I improved upon and gained several personal qualities and attributes that molded me into the person I am today. Hockey is a demanding sport. It requires tedious preparation and the utmost dedication. Each year hockey grew more demanding as we practiced more in preparation for more games. Last year the team practiced three times a week and played games at least three weekends a month. Many of these games were out of state and required long travel times. Since I am playing hockey in Florida, the closest rink is an hour away. This makes practices a big responsibility as well. Hockey season runs throughout the school year. Juggling school, hockey, and a job can get tough but it is well worth it. Hockey taught me a great deal of responsibility as I had to learn how to stay on top of my work even if I was 500 miles from home. Sometimes this meant studying and doing homework on planes, buses, or in hotel rooms. Hockey also taught me teamwork skills which are essential in the classroom. I was chosen as a captain two times for my hockey team. As a captain, one must act a model for his teammates to look up to and turn to in tough times. This taught me leadership which also carried over to the classroom where I learned to encourage classmates. Hockey is a mental sport and demands constant focus. This requires me to always be focused whether my coach is explaining a new breakout play or my teacher is going over a new math formula. Another valuable quality I improved upon through hockey was my character. My coaches have always stressed having good character in games. Whether it entailed never giving up regardless of the score or always acting with class no matter what the final score was, they believed that this was a more important part of the game than any mechanical skill that could possibly be taught. The way I see it, the classroom is very similar to our hockey locker room. There is a group of students, or players, with common goals. In the classroom those goals are to learn new things and get a quality education so they can advance to the next level. In the locker room the goals include developing hockey skills, winning championships, advancing to the next level, and becoming a better, stronger person. Hockey proved to be a useful tool in which I was able to develop several invaluable life skills which carried through to my academics, disposition, and personal life in general. I believe that all the qualities hockey instilled in me will enable me to make a great contribution to the University of Central Florida and empower me to succeed in life after my education. ____________________________________________________________ Don't be afraid to hammer away if necessary, I can take criticism! Thanks again. | ___________________________________________________ Why did you choose to apply to UCF? I have been thinking hard about life after high school since ninth grade. I knew I would be going to college as this subject was not even a question in the minds of my parents and I. Naturally, I was attracted to all Florida schools since I could still be close to home and receive a scholastic scholarship compliments of Florida Bright Futures. However, there are several Florida schools where I could get a college education. I thought long and hard about where I want to spend the following 4 or more years of my life after high school and decided that the University of Central Florida would be a great fit. The thing about UCF that I find most appealing is the academic part of the school. I received a brochure in the mail about a week ago from UCF and read it over thoroughly. I was very pleased to see the low student faculty ratio and the number of majors offered at UCF. There is something for everyone. Though, the most attractive part I read about was the UCF College of Medicine that is opening soon. I have been in health science classes and anatomy classes in high school, and I am really considering pursuing a career in the medical field. My ultimate goal is to become a medical doctor. There would be nothing better than to study pre-medicine at UCF and then have a chance to continue my medical education at the same institution I have been at for the past four years! Although academics is the most important thing I consider in a college, I also consider the location of an institution. Location is a very important factor to me. I do not want to attend a school more than 4 hours away from home. A trip to UCF from Vero Beach is less than half that time. Location is also important in an institution because of its surroundings. Orlando would definitely be a great place to live for four years with so much to do there. Additionally, I am going to need a job to sustain myself while away from home and I should have no problem finding one in a place like Orlando! Even after considering the academics, majors, and the location, there are even more factors that play a role in choosing where I apply. One of those are the opinions of current and past students of UCF. I have several friends who either currently attend or have attended UCF and I spoke with each one regarding my decision to apply. They all encouraged me to do so explaining that they would not have chosen to go anywhere else. One student I talked to earned a perfect score on his SAT, had flawless grades, and could have gone virtually anywhere he wanted. He chose to go to UCF and never regretted that decision. I was very impressed by that story. Another attractive thing about UCF is its athletics. I have played hockey all my life and was glad to find out that UCF has a club ice hockey team. Hockey is not a vital necessity at college, but I love it so much that it is definitely a great bonus! I also love to watch sports, especially football. I follow the UCF Knights football team and would love to be a part of the experience I watch unfold on Saturdays at the stadium! There are several options for Florida students looking to get a quality college education after high school. Each student has their own preferences for majors offered, location, size, athletics, etc... When considering all these factors in choosing my school, the University of Central Florida is surely an attractive option! ___________________________________________ What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community? Every student brings something different to colleges. Diversity is essential to everything. My family would be boring if we all had the same personalities. My school would be boring if everybody was an eighteen-year old Caucasian male who enjoyed sports and spending time with friends and family. Everything is always better with different varieties of people, it just spices things up. The same is true for colleges and universities, diversity makes the college experience that everybody enjoys so much. Every single student brings something different to the school. I believe that I possess several important qualities that will enable me to make a great contribution to the University of Central Florida in and out of the classroom. I have been playing ice hockey for thirteen years now. Sure, I improved my skating skills, shooting skills, and passing abilities every year. More importantly, though, I improved upon and gained several personal qualities and attributes that molded me into the person I am today. Hockey is a demanding sport. It requires tedious preparation and the utmost dedication. Each year hockey grew more demanding as we practiced more in preparation for more games. Last year the team practiced three times a week and played games at least three weekends a month. Many of these games were out of state and required long travel times. Since I am playing hockey in Florida, the closest rink is an hour away. This makes practices a big responsibility as well. Hockey season runs throughout the school year. Juggling school, hockey, and a job can get tough, but it is well worth it. Hockey taught me a great deal of responsibility as I had to learn how to stay on top of my work even if I was 500 miles from home. Sometimes this meant studying and doing homework on planes, buses, or in hotel rooms. Hockey also taught me teamwork skills which are essential in the classroom. I was chosen as a captain two times for my hockey team. As a captain, one must act a model for his teammates to look up to and turn to in tough times. This taught me leadership which also carried over to the classroom where I learned to encourage classmates. Hockey is a mental sport and demands constant focus. This requires me to always be focused whether my coach is explaining a new breakout play or my teacher is going over a new math formula. Another valuable quality I improved upon through hockey was my character. My coaches have always stressed having good character in games. Whether it entailed never giving up regardless of the score or always acting with class no matter what the final score was, they believed that this was a more important part of the game than any mechanical skill that could possibly be taught. The way I see it, the classroom is very similar to our hockey locker room. There is a group of students, or players, with common goals. In the classroom those goals are to learn new things and get a quality education, so they can advance to the next level. In the locker room the goals include developing hockey skills, winning championships, advancing to the next level, and becoming a better, stronger person. Hockey proved to be a useful tool in which I was able to develop several invaluable life skills which carried through to my academics, disposition, and personal life in general. I believe that all the qualities' hockey instilled in me will enable me to make a great contribution to the University of Central Florida and empower me to succeed in life after my education. ____________________________________________________________ Don't be afraid to hammer away if necessary, I can take criticism! Thanks again. |
The unparalleled and outstanding Take Five Scholars Program allows me to enrich my education in order to add my name to the list of individuals who have graduated and had unimaginable success. Meet students of 30 nationalities cultivates my ability to fit in a new environment, without parents or old friends. Over 200 student clubs give me the chance to explore and develop interests, step out of the old comfort zone and integrate within new community. Moreover, the city of Rochester will have unlimited employments and internships available to me. Thank you very much!~~ | The unparalleled and outstanding Take Five Scholars Program allows me to enrich my education in order to add my name to the list of individuals who have graduated and had unimaginable success. Meet students of 30 nationalities cultivates my ability to fit in a new environment, without parents or old friends. Over 200 student clubs give me the chance to explore and develop interests, step out of the old comfort zone and integrate within new community. Moreover, the city of Rochester will have unlimited employments and internships available to me. Thank you very much!~~ |
November 15, 2006 will forever be engraved in my mind. It was the day I met Ricky, a four-year-old boy who was battling cancer. I met Ricky through a Circle of Love event at Broward General Hospital. And at the time, I had no idea that such a fleeting moment would impact my life so profoundly. Ricky and I spent one afternoon together. We played games, built crafts, and enjoyed the day's festivities; and for a brief moment, I was able to numb Ricky's pain. When the afternoon first began, I could not help thinking how unfair life was that such a young boy would never grow up and enjoy many of life's experiences. But as the day progressed, Ricky made me forget all of those thoughts. He did not seem to think that he had been dealt a bad hand in life; he simply was grateful for each and every day he had. The day ended with a celebratory cake. Ricky was unable to eat the cake, but he knew his limitations and accepted them, which I thought was extremely admirable. At the end of the day, Ricky and I said our good-byes. I went on my way with a lump in my throat knowing that there was a good chance that Ricky would not be around for next year's event. A few weeks later I received a thank-you note from Ricky expressing his gratitude for me coming to visit and playing with him. As I read it, I could not help but feel that I was the blessed one for having the chance to meet such an extraordinary individual. Who would have guessed that a four-year-old boy would teach me so much about life and myself. This experience has forever changed me. I now look at life from a different view. Unlike others, I am fortunate enough to have the opportunity to achieve a higher education. Earning a degree from the University of Florida has been one of my goals for as long as I can remember. I know it will not come easily, nothing worthwhile in life does, but through determination and perseverance I can achieve anything I put my mind to. I have learned to take advantage of every opportunity afforded me, and my college experience will be no exception. My experience with Ricky has taught me to continuously push myself because my potential is limitless. I have also learned the importance of giving back to others and the community, and I will continue to give back to the UF community as a student of the university. I will use my education to not only better myself, but to further help others. As Herbert Spencer once said, "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." | November 15, 2006, will forever be engraved in my mind. It was the day I met Ricky, a four-year-old boy who was battling cancer. I met Ricky through a Circle of Love event at Broward General Hospital. And at the time, I had no idea that such a fleeting moment would impact my life so profoundly. Ricky and I spent one afternoon together. We played games, built crafts, and enjoyed the day's festivities; and for a brief moment, I was able to numb Ricky's pain. When the afternoon first began, I could not help thinking how unfair life was that such a young boy would never grow up and enjoy many of life's experiences. But as the day progressed, Ricky made me forget all of those thoughts. He did not seem to think that he had been dealt a bad hand in life; he simply was grateful for each and every day he had. The day ended with a celebratory cake. Ricky was unable to eat the cake, but he knew his limitations and accepted them, which I thought was extremely admirable. At the end of the day, Ricky and I said our goodbyes. I went on my way with a lump in my throat knowing that there was a good chance that Ricky would not be around for next year's event. A few weeks later I received a thank-you note from Ricky expressing his gratitude for me coming to visit and playing with him. As I read it, I could not help but feel that I was the blessed one for having the chance to meet such an extraordinary individual. Who would have guessed that a four-year-old boy would teach me so much about life and me. This experience has forever changed me. I now look at life from a different view. Unlike others, I am fortunate enough to have the opportunity to achieve a higher education. Earning a degree from the University of Florida has been one of my goals for as long as I can remember. I know it will not come easily, nothing worthwhile in life does, but through determination and perseverance I can achieve anything I put my mind to. I have learned to take advantage of every opportunity afforded me, and my college experience will be no exception. My experience with Ricky has taught me to continuously push myself because my potential is limitless. I have also learned the importance of giving back to others and the community, and I will continue to give back to the OF community as a student of the university. I will use my education to not only better myself, but to further help others. As Herbert Spencer once said, "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." |
Vires signifies strength of all kinds; moral, physical, and intellectual. My intellectual strength goes as far back to middle school. I was just learning the importance of my education. I was sitting in class not doing anything productive, and my teacher told me, "Life is like an exam, there are no make ups." This quote will forever inspire me to do better. It also shows me how important my time is and why I should put it forth something productive, rather than nothing. This is why every year I decide to take more advanced courses. It started with one and then just went on from there, like branches from a tree. This shows how I strengthen myself intellectually. I've gotten used to studying every night and putting an 100% in everything I do. I have grown to become a diligent hardworking young lady. My morals come from being raised by mother who is a firm believer of karma, what goes around, comes around and one who abides by the golden rule: "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." These have been essential to my life. I can distinguish between right and wrong. ... | Virus signifies strength of all kinds; moral, physical, and intellectual. My intellectual strength goes as far back to middle school. I was just learning the importance of my education. I was sitting in class not doing anything productive, and my teacher told me, "Life is like an exam, there are no make-ups." This quote will forever inspire me to do better. It also shows me how important my time is and why I should put it forth something productive, rather than nothing. This is why every year I decide to take more advanced courses. It started with one and then just went on from there, like branches from a tree. This shows how I strengthen myself intellectually. I've gotten used to studying every night and putting an 100% in everything I do. I have grown to become a diligent hardworking young lady. My morals come from being raised by mother who is a firm believer of karma, what goes around, comes around and one who abides by the golden rule: "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." These have been essential to my life. I can distinguish between right and wrong. ... |
The word that appealed to me the most was Artes. I've been a musician for eight years and I fully understand how dedication to a skill pays off in the end. Music is definitely an aspect that takes perseverance to succeed in. As we all know, when someone is first leaning an instrument, they definitely don't start at the professional level. When I first started playing piano ... | The word that appealed to me the most was Arts. I've been a musician for eight years and I fully understand how dedication to a skill pays off in the end. Music is definitely an aspect that takes perseverance to succeed in. As we all know, when someone is first leaning an instrument, they definitely don't start at the professional level. When I first started playing piano ... |
I grew up in a very Scandinavian family. Both of my parents are honest, hard working people. whom sincerely believe that school is the only way to go, and that there is but one way to go: Up. My father came from a somewhat poor family of six children growing up in a small village outside in northern Sweden. I remember stories he told me when I was young where he didn't have the money to buy a shoe string to tie his shoes. On the other hand, my mom grew up in a middle class family outside of Gothenburg, Sweden and had all the material possessions she could want. And yet, my parents strongly insist that money does not bring happiness. For a while I was at a loss as to what this meant. Both parents were wealthy and had more than enough money to buy whatever we wanted. And yet they chose not to spoil me or my siblings. Until recently I did not understand their actions and motives. But on a recent trip back to our home country, I realized how this all fit into place. My parents had seen what a wonderfully amazing world we live in, and they chose to explore a higher education as a means to learn more about this delightful planet. I had realized as they had once also done, that education is not about the potential for money or for greatness, but is instead a important pathway for us to learn more about ourselves and the lives we lead. I had learned that a solid education will help secure a career of happiness in an area that we truly appreciate, leading to a higher happiness than otherwise possible. | I grew up in a very Scandinavian family. Both of my parents are honest, hardworking people. Whom sincerely believe that school is the only way to go, and that there is but one way to go: Up. My father came from a somewhat poor family of six children growing up in a small village outside in northern Sweden. I remember stories he told me when I was young where he didn't have the money to buy a shoe string to tie his shoes. On the other hand, my mom grew up in a middle class family outside of Gothenburg, Sweden and had all the material possessions she could want. And yet, my parents strongly insist that money does not bring happiness. For a while I was at a loss as to what this meant. Both parents were wealthy and had more than enough money to buy whatever we wanted. And yet they chose not to spoil me or my siblings. Until recently I did not understand their actions and motives. But on a recent trip back to our home country, I realized how this all fit into place. My parents had seen what a wonderfully amazing world we live in, and they chose to explore a higher education as a means to learn more about this delightful planet. I had realized as they had once also done, that education is not about the potential for money or for greatness, but is instead an important pathway for us to learn more about ourselves and the lives we lead. I had learned that a solid education will help secure a career of happiness in an area that we truly appreciate, leading to a higher happiness than otherwise possible. |
"What this power is, I cannot say. All I know is that it exists...and it becomes available only when you are in that state of mind in which you know exactly what you want...and are fully determined not to quit until you get it." This quote by Alexander Graham Bell exemplifies my dream; the dream that I will one day present myself proudly in Florida State colors of gold and garnet. Looking back on my life I find that the Latin word "Vires" strongly signifies what I believe in; Strength. Every day I embody myself with Moral, Physical, and Intellectual strength. In high school my idea of moral strength has been challenged to the extreme. The reality of what is cool and what is not really sets in and makes you think. I for one will never change my ideas of what is right and what is wrong. Growing up in a multiracial household has really given me a different perspective of morality. At a very young age my parents taught me treat a person like a recipe; never judge them from their ingredients but taste test them in many different ways and see how well the final product makes your mouth water. I will always stand by in this metaphor no matter where I am or who I am with. Basketball is where my physical strength comes from. When people ask me why I play basketball I simply reply, "I love the sport. It's not just a way to shed a few pounds, but it also builds character." The minute I step foot on the court I feel a sense of invincibility, but the real accomplishment comes from defeat. Once I glace up at the final scoreboard and see my team won, it makes all the early morning jogs, extra practice and weightlifting sessions well worth it. I consider the brain one of the most important parts of the body. My intellectual strength comes straight from the classroom. I feel like knowledge is a privilege. Although there are times when I wish I could sleep in instead of going to school, I think about all of the children in third world countries. Some of those children do not get the chance to learn. My intellectual strength gives me the ability to excel in the classroom, as well as not take it for granted. Although certain of my strength, I know that I cannot get any weaker, only stronger. The only place I feel that will lead me in the direction of growth of strength is Florida State University. | "What this power is, I cannot say. All I know is that it exists...and it becomes available only when you are in that state of mind in which you know exactly what you want...and are fully determined not to quit until you get it." This quote by Alexander Graham Bell exemplifies my dream; the dream that I will one day present myself proudly in Florida State colors of gold and garnet. Looking back on my life I find that the Latin word "Virus" strongly signifies what I believe in; Strength. Every day I embody myself with Moral, Physical, and Intellectual strength. In high school my idea of moral strength has been challenged to the extreme. The reality of what is cool and what is not really sets in and makes you think. I, for one, will never change my ideas of what is right and what is wrong. Growing up in a multiracial household has really given me a different perspective of morality. At a very young age my parents taught me treat a person like a recipe; never judge them from their ingredients but taste test them in many ways and see how well the final product makes your mouth water. I will always stand by in this metaphor no matter where I am or who I am with. Basketball is where my physical strength comes from. When people ask me why I play basketball I simply reply, "I love the sport. It's not just a way to shed a few pounds, but it also builds character." The minute I step foot on the court I feel a sense of invincibility, but the real accomplishment comes from defeat. Once I glacé up at the final scoreboard and see my team won, it makes all the early morning jogs, extra practice and weightlifting sessions well worth it. I consider the brain one of the most important parts of the body. My intellectual strength comes straight from the classroom. I feel like knowledge is a privilege. Although there are times when I wish I could sleep in instead of going to school, I think about all the children in Third World countries. Some of those children do not get the chance to learn. My intellectual strength gives me the ability to excel in the classroom, as well as not take it for granted. Although certain of my strength, I know that I cannot get any weaker, only stronger. The only place I feel that will lead me in the direction of growth of strength is Florida State University. |
When the prompt says 'explain why', I don't know if they want me to explain why I chose that research topic, or why I chose the professor, or both. So I lumped it all together. >< It seems like their should be more focus on the professor part, but I was thinking if I don't give a background on what I want to do, how am I supposed to justify why I want to work with the professor? Prompt:Penn offers its undergraduates an eminent faculty and a wealth of research opportunities. Use the space below to name a Penn professor with whom you would like to study or conduct research and explain why. (It is not our expectation that you contact faculty directly to answer this question.) [limit of 1000 characters] I would like to conduct a research with Professor Howard Pack on the prerequisites of privatization with specific reference to African and Asian economies. While nations like Singapore are able to thrive on privatization for economic progress, others like Zambia have seen otherwise. This could the result of coerced privatization under the Structural Adjustment Programme, or of premature economic decisions. Hence, if a set of prerequisites can be defined, African nations might be able to firmly break into the international market and escape from poverty. With the knowledge that Professor Pack has about African and especially Asian economies, I believe he would be able to provide valuable insights to approach this topic. Besides, interesting factors like political systems and stability can be explored as he lately commented on the article 'Political Tensions are Creating New Rules for International Business'. This would give the research greater scope and relevance to the modern world. [998 characters] | When the prompt says 'explain why', I don't know if they want me to explain why I chose that research topic, or why I chose the professor, or both. So I lumped it all together. Sgt;Lt; It seems like there should be more focus on the professor part, but I was thinking if I don't give a background on what I want to do, how am I supposed to justify why I want to work with the professor? Prompt:Penn offers its undergraduates an eminent faculty and a wealth of research opportunities. Use the space below to name a Penn professor with whom you would like to study or conduct research and explain why. (It is not our expectation that you contact faculty directly to answer this question.) [limit of 1000 characters] I would like to conduct research with Professor Howard Pack on the prerequisites of privatization with specific reference to African and Asian economies. While nations like Singapore are able to thrive on privatization for economic progress, others like Zambia have seen otherwise. This could the result of coerced privatization under the Structural Adjustment Program, or of premature economic decisions. Hence, if a set of prerequisites can be defined, African nations might be able to firmly break into the international market and escape from poverty. With the knowledge that Professor Pack has about African and especially Asian economies, I believe he would be able to provide valuable insights to approach this topic. Besides, interesting factors like political systems and stability can be explored as he lately commented on the article 'Political Tensions are Creating New Rules for International Business'. This would give the research greater scope and relevance to the modern world. [998 characters] |
Two years ago I went to a summer school in England. It was the first time that I traveled abroad without my family, and it was an amazing experience. For the first time in my life, I felt different. Everyone there seemed to behave and think differently from what I expected. However, I knew that it was vital for me to adapt. Why? Because we live in a global community so we need to understand and appreciate the differences amongst nations in order to live harmoniously in this World. An example of such differences is the following: Greek people typically greet each other with a hug and a kiss while British people are more reserved and they avoid any unnecessary contact. Conversations amongst Greeks are loud and animated, unlike those of British people that tend to be less noisy and more controlled. I quickly learned that what Greeks often see as "coldness" in English people is simply a sincere respect of privacy. Regarding my contribution to the University's diversity, I believe that the most important one is my Greek heritage. Many of my British friends were very interested in Greek history, language, and way of life. For example, they asked why science, medicine and mathematical terms come from Greek. I explained to them that the ancient Greeks were pioneers in these fields. In my opinion, the variety of nationalities in a University is an opportunity for students to learn about other cultures and gain respect and appreciation for others. | Two years ago I went to a summer school in England. It was the first time that I traveled abroad without my family, and it was an amazing experience. For the first time in my life, I felt different. Everyone there seemed to behave and think differently from what I expected. However, I knew that it was vital for me to adapt. Why? Because we live in a global community, so we need to understand and appreciate the differences amongst nations in order to live harmoniously in this World. An example of such differences is the following: Greek people typically greet each other with a hug and a kiss while British people are more reserved, and they avoid any unnecessary contact. Conversations amongst Greeks are loud and animated, unlike those of British people that tend to be less noisy and more controlled. I quickly learned that what Greeks often see as "coldness" in English people is simply a sincere respect of privacy. Regarding my contribution to the University's diversity, I believe that the most important one is my Greek heritage. Many of my British friends were very interested in Greek history, language, and way of life. For example, they asked why science, medicine and mathematical terms come from Greek. I explained to them that the ancient Greeks were pioneers in these fields. In my opinion, the variety of nationalities in a University is an opportunity for students to learn about other cultures and gain respect and appreciation for others. |
Ever since I remember myself I was always eager to participate in events such as school celebrations and charity events. I used to organize theatrical plays and bazaars at my school in order to fundraise for charities. I have always loved everything that has to do with organization, management and finance, so when I started thinking about my future I searched for a program that would satisfy these passions. I realized that the most suitable major field that combines all of my interests is Business Administration. At the University of Michigan, I am interested in studying Economics, since they are very good base for Business Administration. I had always had the impression that Economics comprise only the circulation of money. In high school, I took Economics courses and I was glad to realize that many aspects of a society, apart from financial, can be fully understood through Economic theory. I also learnt that in economics an issue may be approached by several ways, a fact that made the subject even more appealing to me. I have finally come to the decision that Economics is a field of study in which I am very interested in and I believe that I will be very good at. I think that studying Economics is the best way for me to make my passion a carrier. I am sure that I have a lot of potentials in this field, since I am studious, passionate, shrewd, creative, social and dedicated to what I do. | Ever since I remember myself I was always eager to participate in events such as school celebrations and charity events. I used to organize theatrical plays and bazaars at my school in order to fundraise for charities. I have always loved everything that has to do with organization, management and finance, so when I started thinking about my future I searched for a program that would satisfy these passions. Furthermore, I realized that the most suitable major field that combines all of my interests is Business Administration. At the University of Michigan, I am interested in studying Economics, since they are very good base for Business Administration. I had always had the impression that Economics comprise only the circulation of money. In high school, I took Economics courses, and I was glad to realize that many aspects of a society, apart from financial, can be fully understood through Economic theory. I also learned that in economics an issue may be approached by several ways, a fact that made the subject even more appealing to me. I have finally come to the decision that Economics is a field of study in which I am very interested in, and I believe that I will be very good at. Furthermore, I think that studying Economics is the best way for me to make my passion a carrier. Furthermore, I am sure that I have a lot of potentials in this field, since I am studious, passionate, shrewd, creative, social and dedicated to what I do. |
Here's my topic:How will your individual background, experiences and personal identity influence your educational pursuits and your contributions to the campus community at the University of Florida? You may wish to reflect on the following:Significant life challenges or personal circumstancesExceptional talents and outstanding achievementEducational aspirationsPersonal andor family responsibilitiesLife can be full of many obstacle and surprises. It is not always the obstacle that we have been faced with that defines us, but rather how we overcome it and what we become from it as a result. This is what makes us distinctive and unique. The obstacles that I have faced and overcome helped shape me into who I am today. Not too long ago, my dad had lost his job due to the collapsing economy. He has a Ph.D. in electrical engineering and jobs in his position are hard to find. He was unable to find a job near our home in Toronto, leaving him no choice but to leave the country and find opportunities in America. Living away from my dad was like trying to swim without a lifeguard. He had always guided me and given me advice. Family had always been our top priority; we put each other before anything else. This made living apart an uncomfortable task. After almost a year, my dad had found a business opportunity in Florida, and as a desperate attempt to restore our lives to what it once was, we moved. It was our only chance at the time to live together as a family. The decision to move took me by surprise, even though it was obvious that we would have to move eventually. I had just finished my sophomore year of high school and continuing my education in a different country might be difficult. I knew there were going to be many challenges that I would have to face and ultimately overcome. The transition was not very easy, but I soon made some new friends and adapted to the American culture. I began helping out my parents with the business as I became familiar with the new course work in school. I used to go straight to them after school only to find them exhausted after a hard day of work. I felt that it was my duty to help them because of all the sacrifices they had made for us. Seeing their struggle to overcome adversity opened my eyes to understand the difficulties of everyday life. I now look at the world through a whole different perspective. Life is not carefree; you have to work hard to play hard. Just like my dad always said, "Work today and play tomorrow." My parents always stressed the importance of education and commitment. Growing up with this mindset shaped my work ethic and helped me maintain my grades as in this transition. I had always tried my best in school, but simply to please my parents. I now realize the significance of an education; which is why it is my priority to achieve nothing but academic excellence. This is what drives me in my quest for perfection. ----------------------------------------- Please help me out and thanks in advance! | Here's my topic:How will your individual background, experiences and personal identity influence your educational pursuits and your contributions to the campus community at the University of Florida? You may wish to reflect on the following:Significant life challenges or personal circumstancesExceptional talents and outstanding achievementEducational aspirationsPersonal ardor family responsibilitiesLife can be full of many obstacle and surprises. It is not always the obstacle that we have been faced with that defines us, but rather how we overcome it and what we become from it as a result. This is what makes us distinctive and unique. The obstacles that I have faced and overcome helped shape me into who I am today. Not too long ago, my dad had lost his job due to the collapsing economy. He has a Ph.D. in electrical engineering and jobs in his position are hard to find. He was unable to find a job near our home in Toronto, leaving him no choice but to leave the country and find opportunities in America. Living away from my dad was like trying to swim without a lifeguard. He had always guided me and given me advice. Family had always been our top priority; we put each other before anything else. This made living apart an uncomfortable task. After almost a year, my dad had found a business opportunity in Florida, and as a desperate attempt to restore our lives to what it once was, we moved. It was our only chance at the time to live together as a family. The decision to move took me by surprise, even though it was obvious that we would have to move eventually. I had just finished my sophomore year of high school and continuing my education in a different country might be difficult. I knew there were going to be many challenges that I would have to face and ultimately overcome. The transition was not very easy, but I soon made some new friends and adapted to the American culture. I began helping out my parents with the business as I became familiar with the new course work in school. I used to go straight to them after school only to find them exhausted after a hard day of work. Furthermore, I felt that it was my duty to help them because of all the sacrifices they had made for us. Seeing their struggle to overcome adversity opened my eyes to understand the difficulties of everyday life. I now look at the world through a whole different perspective. Life is not carefree; you have to work hard to play hard. Just like my dad always said, "Work today and play tomorrow." My parents always stressed the importance of education and commitment. Growing up with this mindset shaped my work ethic and helped me maintain my grades as in this transition. I had always tried my best in school, but simply to please my parents. I now realize the significance of an education; which is why it is my priority to achieve nothing but academic excellence. This is what drives me in my quest for perfection. ----------------------------------------- Please help me out and thanks in advance! |
To me, the Latin word Vires is quite complex. True strength exists in many forms, including moral strength, intellectual strength, and physical strength. Each of these three individual strengths are very important, and together they form one very powerful word that is symbolic of many ideas. Moral strength is significant in my life because I believe it is foundational to who I am and how other people view me. I am involved with people of all ages, and many look up to me and ask me for guidance. People know they can trust me and that I will not make hasty decisions based on whim or emotions. By living a life that exemplifies moral strength, I reveal my true character as one who is respectful and well-respected. Also, I am a Christian and a firm believer in Jesus Christ. Vires, as interpreted in a moral sense, is honoring to God and living in a way that is pleasing to Him. As I want to serve God with my life, setting a good godly example for others to follow means setting high moral standards. The next aspect of strength that is important to me is that of intellect. I have been blessed with a mind capable of learning and understanding a great deal of things. I have a thirst for knowledge and strive to learn and discover new things. When given the opportunity to challenge myself or view life from a different perspective, I seize the opportunity. I believe in always appreciating every aspect of life, and never taking things for granted. Knowledge, wisdom, and understanding are absolutely priceless to me, and I strive to explore that which was previously unknown to me in order to advance and further expand my mind. The idea of college and a whole new level of learning excites me. I have a very powerful determination and drive, and when I set out to learn something new, much can be accomplished. I believe Florida State University is the best place to further broaden my mind and equip me for the future. One of my favorite quotes is that of Oliver Wendell Holmes, which states that a mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions. The last type of strength that I hold in high regard is physical strength. Although I am not very muscular or an Olympic athlete, I still believe in taking care of my body, and I work hard to strengthen it a little each day. Over the years, I have played on many different school sports teams; my favorite was volleyball. It was unique in that readiness for this sport involved rigorous training and conditioning. To be able to hit the ball at any given moment in any circumstance requires a great level of discipline, endurance and intense willpower. Achieving goals are important as their successes are what motivate me to move forward and push myself to be all that I can be. Also, physical strength promotes living a healthy life and that will in turn lead to a happier life. In conclusion, all three of these forms of strength tipify my life and who I am. Each type of strength coincides with the other; they all complement each other, and without each of these, a portion of the beauty and meaning is lost. I want to live a life that is pleasing to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and one of the best ways is by applying Vires to every area of my own life. | To me, the Latin word Virus is quite complex. True strength exists in many forms, including moral strength, intellectual strength, and physical strength. Each of these three individual strengths are very important, and together they form one very powerful word that is symbolic of many ideas. Moral strength is significant in my life because I believe it is foundational to who I am and how other people view me. I am involved with people of all ages, and many look up to me and ask me for guidance. People know they can trust me and that I will not make hasty decisions based on whim or emotions. By living a life that exemplifies moral strength, I reveal my true character as one who is respectful and well-respected. Also, I am a Christian and a firm believer in Jesus Christ. Virus, as interpreted in a moral sense, is honoring to God and living in a way that is pleasing to Him. As I want to serve God with my life, setting a good godly example for others to follow means setting high moral standards. The next aspect of strength that is important to me is that of intellect. I have been blessed with a mind capable of learning and understanding a great deal of things. I have a thirst for knowledge and strive to learn and discover new things. When given the opportunity to challenge myself or view life from a different perspective, I seize the opportunity. I believe in always appreciating every aspect of life, and never taking things for granted. Knowledge, wisdom, and understanding are absolutely priceless to me, and I strive to explore that which was previously unknown to me in order to advance and further expand my mind. The idea of college and a whole new level of learning excites me. I have a very powerful determination and drive, and when I set out to learn something new, much can be accomplished. I believe Florida State University is the best place to further broaden my mind and equip me for the future. One of my favorite quotes is that of Oliver Wendell Holmes, which states that a mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions. The last type of strength that I hold in high regard is physical strength. Although I am not very muscular or an Olympic athlete, I still believe in taking care of my body, and I work hard to strengthen it a little each day. Over the years, I have played on many school sports teams; my favorite was volleyball. It was unique in that readiness for this sport involved rigorous training and conditioning. To be able to hit the ball at any given moment in any circumstance requires a great level of discipline, endurance and intense willpower. Achieving goals are important as their successes are what motivate me to move forward and push myself to be all that I can be. Also, physical strength promotes living a healthy life and that will in turn lead to a happier life. In conclusion, all three of these forms of strength typify my life and who I am. Each type of strength coincides with the other; they all complement each other, and without each of these, a portion of the beauty and meaning is lost. I want to live a life that is pleasing to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and one of the best ways is by applying Virus to every area of my own life. |
The Florida State University motto "Vires, Artes, Mores" focuses on strength, the arts, and tradition. Although I believe that I embody each of these characteristics, mental and intellectual strength, as signified by "Vires", has been forefront in my life. The recent and sudden death of my father has made me the emotionally and mentally stronger young woman I am today. My strength was certainly challenged towards the end of my sophomore year, when the news of my father's illness sent shock waves through my body. I couldn't imagine how I would ever survive without my dad's big bear hugs, or his enthusiasm when it came to helping me for school in any way he could. I thought I had prepared myself to see him laying in a hospital bed, but I soon realized that I would never be ready for that sight. I would not allow myself to think of my life without my dad, but I had to face that reality only a short month later. When my dad passed away, it took me several days to make sense of anything that was happening. I wanted to avoid the real world, and the reality that my father was gone. I could have easily slipped into a cocoon and hid from my emotions. However, a part of me knew that I was stronger than that. My father taught me to have a work ethic that was untouchable, even when my life wasn't exactly what I had planned. Because of my mental and intellectual strength, my grades never once slipped, even when I was visiting my dad every night for hours. My main priority was still to make my dad proud, which is what I intended to do. My strength grew during this life changing experience, and continues to grow everyday. My father's death was an untimely event that humbled me and changed me as a person dramatically. I believe that I have been transformed into a stronger person, both mentally and emotionally. The little things in life that used to dominate my thoughts a year ago are now not as important. I have gained the ability to see what is really important, particularly my own family. Also, my great moral strength has improved my work ethic and I am now even more encouraged to fight for what I want. My father's only request of me was to make him proud, which is what I intend to do every day for the rest of my life. Although I will come across more obstacles like my father's death, I know I have the strength to carry on and use the experience to better myself. As a student at Florida State University, I will carry over my mental and emotional strength to become a student that I know would make my dad proud. | The Florida State University motto "Virus, Arts, Mores" focuses on strength, the arts, and tradition. Although I believe that I embody each of these characteristics, mental and intellectual strength, as signified by "Virus", has been forefront in my life. The recent and sudden death of my father has made me the emotionally and mentally stronger young woman I am today. My strength was certainly challenged towards the end of my sophomore year, when the news of my father's illness sent shock waves through my body. I couldn't imagine how I would ever survive without my dad's big bear hugs, or his enthusiasm when it came to helping me for school in any way he could. I thought I had prepared myself to see him laying in a hospital bed, but I soon realized that I would never be ready for that sight. Furthermore, I would not allow myself to think of my life without my dad, but I had to face that reality only a short month later. When my dad passed away, it took me several days to make sense of anything that was happening. I wanted to avoid the real world, and the reality that my father was gone. I could have easily slipped into a cocoon and hid from my emotions. However, a part of me knew that I was stronger than that. My father taught me to have a work ethic that was untouchable, even when my life wasn't exactly what I had planned. Because of my mental and intellectual strength, my grades never once slipped, even when I was visiting my dad every night for hours. My main priority was still to make my dad proud, which is what I intended to do. My strength grew during this life-changing experience, and continues to grow every day. My father's death was an untimely event that humbled me and changed me as a person dramatically. I believe that I have been transformed into a stronger person, both mentally and emotionally. The little things in life that used to dominate my thoughts a year ago are now not as important. I have gained the ability to see what is really important, particularly my own family. Also, my great moral strength has improved my work ethic, and I am now even more encouraged to fight for what I want. My father's only request of me was to make him proud, which is what I intend to do every day for the rest of my life. Although I will come across more obstacles like my father's death, I know I have the strength to carry on and use the experience to better myself. As a student at Florida State University, I will carry over my mental and emotional strength to become a student that I know would make my dad proud. |
Although I live in the United States now, I was born and raised in Brazil. I grew up in the middle of a strong and emotionally connected family. The definition of family, in my opinion, is not only the blood relations, but also friends who care for each other. If anyone had asked me 5 years ago if I think I could survive living outside of my comfort zone, I would have probably said no. My dad has worked all his life drawing and managing shoe lines. He was always traveling to distant places like Italy, China, and the United States. The businesses in Brazil were prospering, but all of a sudden, our region started to go into a recession. My dad's company was compromised and his bosses offered him the chance of a life time: move to the United States and start life from zero. My family and I were devastated with the news. After all, my entire family lived in the same city, and leaving would mean missing all the fun. My parents, however, saw this as a great oportunity to give me and my brother an unforgettable experience. At first, I was really upset that we were leaving all our lifes behind to create a new one in a foreign country. The last few months in Brazil flew by, and in the blink of an eye, me, my brother and my parents were boarding to our new adventure, Boston MA. I had visited the United States before, but knowing we had a one way ticket gave me a bitter feeling. The moment I stepped outside of the airplane I felt really lucky because I realized I had been given a once in a lifetime chance to become a better, more cultured person. It wasn't long before my parents found a good school distric to move into. Although I had finished seventh grade in Brazil with exellent grades, the principal at my new school chose to hold me back because of the language. At first, I wasn't looking forward to repeating half of something I had already acomplished, soon afterwards, however, I realized the importance of education. It also set the bar really high for my grades since I was getting straight "As". As I got used to English, I also began to value different things like teamwork, creativity and innovation. The way everything was organized and respected amazed me because everyone was always doing something that in some way or another would benefit the school. It didn't take me long to adhere to those activities. Days turned into years and eigth grade was coming to an end. I thought we had settled in Boston for good since we had purchased a house, but my father had another trick up his sleeve. He told us he had gotten another job in Florida, and in a couple of months we were going to be moving there. I had been preparing myself for high school in Boston, and knowing that everything would change again was making me melancholic. My dad noticed our insecurity and he decided to take us all to Jacksonville, FL for a weekend trip so we could see what our lifes would be like. The moment I saw the breath-taking beaches and noticed how nice people there were I changed my mind. We moved to Jacksonville in January 2007. Not long after that my parents bought a house and I started to go to Bartram Trail High School. It was very different from my high school in Boston because everything here had a southern aspect that I enjoyed. Although I still talked to my Bostonian friends, It didn't take me too long to make new friends and feel like I was part of something special. They made me feel very welcome and that is why I love Florida so much and plan on staying here for college. My high school years were sensational. I joined many clubs and I always engaged in school events. Because I have a thorough understanding of math and its principles, I joined the Mu-Alpha-Theta club to share my enjoyment of mathematics with my school. I also joined the Key Club because I never hesitate to help others. I feel acomplished by knowing that I made a difference in someone else's life. Another club I joined was the Photo Club because I like to take pictures, and above all, I love to use photoshop to manipulate images and make them into something out of the ordinary. Similarly, I joined a newly founded club called To Catch a Fire, where we discuss about peace, freedom, and its contributions in today's society. Today, I look back and remember all the good times I had while in those clubs and I always look forwards to our next meetings. I have also been helping my brother, who has difficulty learning, overcome this problem. Alomost everyday we sit together at the dinner table and I help and assist him with his homework. Eversince I started tutoring him he has been getting better grades and more friends at school. I am very proud of being able to help my brother, and although he takes it for granted sometimes, I know he will appreciate me help in the future. Although it is only twice a year, every time I go back to Brazil I take a day off and help out the community. Last time I went me and my family help restore a house that is now occupied by a blessed family. I have always been an intelligent person, especially when it comes to school. Because English was still a bit challenging to me, during my Freshman and Sophmore years I took regular classes. I studied very hard and managed to overcome the language barrier and got exellent grades. During my Junior year I began to take honors and AP classes that challenged me to keep raising the bar. With effort and dedication I maintained my 4.16 GPA. Now during my Senior year, I am still taking classes that challenge me, and since seventh grade, I have been getting straight "As". With all those club memberships and school work I thought it would be hard to balance a job in the equation, but I was willing to give it a try. I was hired on March 2007 to work as a cashier for Winn Dixie. Since then I have been getting raises and bonuses for the great job. I still work there today, and I balance a 20 hourweek job with school and clubs to get exellent grades. This job has taught me how to handle money, deal with costumers, and help maintain a clean and organized work space. I have broken many cultural barriers, and I would be a great addition to the FSU family. I am a friendly, loyal and clearly dedicated individual who has an ambition to succeed in any given environment. I have an extensive experience as a devoted student and I love to learn. I am always up to a challenge whatever the situation. I get along well with others, but I also work efficiently on my own. THANK YOU SO MUCH,leo | Although I live in the United States now, I was born and raised in Brazil. I grew up in the middle of a strong and emotionally connected family. The definition of family, in my opinion, is not only the blood relations, but also friends who care for each other. If anyone had asked me 5 years ago if I think I could survive living outside my comfort zone, I would have probably said no. My dad has worked all his life drawing and managing shoe lines. He was always traveling to distant places like Italy, China, and the United States. The businesses in Brazil were prospering, but all of a sudden, our region started to go into a recession. My dad's company was compromised, and his bosses offered him the chance of a lifetime: move to the United States and start life from zero. My family and I were devastated with the news. After all, my entire family lived in the same city, and leaving would mean missing all the fun. My parents, however, saw this as a great opportunity to give me and my brother an unforgettable experience. At first, I was really upset that we were leaving all our lives behind to create a new one in a foreign country. The last few months in Brazil flew by, and in the blink of an eye, me, my brother and my parents were boarding to our new adventure, Boston MA. I had visited the United States before, but knowing we had a one way ticket gave me a bitter feeling. The moment I stepped outside the airplane I felt really lucky because I realized I had been given a once in a lifetime chance to become a better, more cultured person. It wasn't long before my parents found a good school district to move into. Although I had finished seventh grade in Brazil with excellent grades, the principal at my new school chose to hold me back because of the language. At first, I wasn't looking forward to repeating half of something I had already accomplished, soon afterwards, however, I realized the importance of education. It also set the bar really high for my grades since I was getting straight "As". As I got used to English, I also began to value different things like teamwork, creativity and innovation. The way everything was organized and respected amazed me because everyone was always doing something that in some way or another would benefit the school. It didn't take me long to adhere to those activities. Days turned into years and eight grade was coming to an end. I thought we had settled in Boston for good since we had purchased a house, but my father had another trick up his sleeve. He told us he had gotten another job in Florida, and in a couple of months we were going to be moving there. I had been preparing myself for high school in Boston, and knowing that everything would change again was making me melancholic. My dad noticed our insecurity, and he decided to take us all to Jacksonville, FL for a weekend trip, so we could see what our lives would be like. The moment I saw the breathtaking beaches and noticed how nice people there were I changed my mind. We moved to Jacksonville in January 2007. Not long after that my parents bought a house and I started to go to Bertram Trail High School. It was very different from my high school in Boston because everything here had a southern aspect that I enjoyed. Although I still talked to my Bostonian friends, It didn't take me too long to make new friends and feel like I was part of something special. They made me feel very welcome and that is why I love Florida so much and plan on staying here for college. My high school years were sensational. I joined many clubs and I always engaged in school events. Because I have a thorough understanding of math and its principles, I joined the Mu-Alpha-Theta club to share my enjoyment of mathematics with my school. I also joined the Key Club because I never hesitate to help others. I feel accomplished by knowing that I made a difference in someone else's life. Another club I joined was the Photo Club because I like to take pictures, and above all, I love to use Photoshop to manipulate images and make them into something out of the ordinary. Similarly, I joined a newly founded club called To Catch a Fire, where we discuss peace, freedom, and its contributions in today's society. Today, I look back and remember all the good times I had while in those clubs and I always look forwards to our next meetings. I have also been helping my brother, who has difficulty learning, overcome this problem. Almost everyday we sit together at the dinner table and I help and assist him with his homework. Ever since I started tutoring him he has been getting better grades and more friends at school. I am very proud of being able to help my brother, and although he takes it for sometimes granted, I know he will appreciate me help in the future. Although it is only twice a year, every time I go back to Brazil I take a day off and help out the community. Last time I went me and my family help restore a house that is now occupied by a blessed family. I have always been an intelligent person, especially when it comes to school. Because English was still a bit challenging to me, during my Freshman and Sophomore years I took regular classes. I studied very hard and managed to overcome the language barrier and got excellent grades. During my Junior year I began to take honors and AP classes that challenged me to keep raising the bar. With effort and dedication I maintained my 4.16 GPA. Now during my Senior year, I am still taking classes that challenge me, and since seventh grade, I have been getting straight "As". With all those club memberships and school work I thought it would be hard to balance a job in the equation, but I was willing to give it a try. I was hired on March 2007 to work as a cashier for Winn-Dixie. Since then, I have been getting raises and bonuses for the great job. I still work there today, and I balance a 20 hour week job with school and clubs to get excellent grades. This job has taught me how to handle money, deal with costumers, and help maintain a clean and organized work space. I have broken many cultural barriers, and I would be a great addition to the FSU family. I am a friendly, loyal and clearly dedicated individual who has an ambition to succeed in any given environment. Furthermore, I have an extensive experience as a devoted student and I love to learn. Furthermore, I am always up to a challenge whatever the situation. Furthermore, I get along well with others, but I also work efficiently on my own. THANK YOU SO MUCH, leo |
It took me sixteen years to realize what an extraordinary influence my brother has in my life. He is the person who always advises me and tries to help me with anything I need. He was the first to hug me when I didn't want to go to school at first grade; he was the first to hold my hand when I was ill; he was the first to congratulate me when I won my first trophy. In every single achievement in my life, he was always there. Our relationship was exceptional, as was everything in my life until the day he had to leave for the United States to study at the University of Michigan. That day I felt like the whole world was falling apart. That day I realized he would no more be a part of my everyday life, and that was insupportable. All my life I used to share everything with my brother, from my happiest moments to my biggest problems, and he was always there, eager to listen to me. During the first month after his departure, the impact of his absence on me was even greater than I had expected. Apart from the fact that I missed him, other problems were also created. Having used to open up only to my brother, I had nobody to talk to after he left, and therefore I was feeling even lonelier. Thankfully, with the new school year I was distracted and I did not feel the need to talk to anyone about my personal issues. A few months later I noticed that I was usually angry and stressful, and I realized it was due to my introversion. I decided that I couldn't wait for my brother to return to Greece in order to open up to someone, neither could I spend a fortune in transatlantic calls. So, firstly I tried to open up to my parents, but even though they love me and care about me very much, they couldn't understand me, mainly due to our age difference. They couldn't understand how an issue that is of no importance to them can be major for a sixteen-year-old girl. Secondly, I tried to talk to my friends, but this attempt wasn't that successful either. Even though I communicated better with them, I couldn't trust their discretion. Finally, I found the best balance between the credibility of the family and the understanding of the friends. I found a girl that was trustworthy and seemed to care sincerely about me and I shared with her my silly girlish issues, but when it came to more important matters, I always discussed them with my parents. A year after my brothers departure, I had finally resolved the setback and had got accustomed of his absence. If something similar happened in the future, I am certain I would be more prepared for it and I would face it more maturely. My brother's absence may have been one of the most significant setbacks in my life, but it has also been one of the most educational experiences. I learned to be independent, to trust people and to be able to find a balance between things. Of course I haven't stopped completely communicating with my brother, but I have learnt to make my own decisions and not to rely completely on him, or anybody else. | It took me sixteen years to realize what an extraordinary influence my brother has in my life. He is the person who always advises me and tries to help me with anything I need. He was the first to hug me when I didn't want to go to school at first grade; he was the first to hold my hand when I was ill; he was the first to congratulate me when I won my first trophy. In every single achievement in my life, he was always there. Our relationship was exceptional, as was everything in my life until the day he had to leave for the United States to study at the University of Michigan. That day I felt like the whole world was falling apart. That day I realized he would no more be a part of my everyday life, and that was insupportable. All my life I used to share everything with my brother, from my happiest moments to my biggest problems, and he was always there, eager to listen to me. During the first month after his departure, the impact of his absence on me was even greater than I had expected. Apart from the fact that I missed him, other problems were also created. Having used to open up only to my brother, I had nobody to talk to after he left, and therefore I was feeling even lonelier. Thankfully, with the new school year I was distracted, and I did not feel the need to talk to anyone about my personal issues. A few months later I noticed that I was usually angry and stressful, and I realized it was due to my introversion. I decided that I couldn't wait for my brother to return to Greece in order to open up to someone, neither could I spend a fortune in transatlantic calls. So, firstly I tried to open up to my parents, but even though they love me and care about me very much, they couldn't understand me, mainly due to our age difference. They couldn't understand how an issue that is of no importance to them can be major for a sixteen-year-old girl. Secondly, I tried to talk to my friends, but this attempt wasn't that successful either. Even though I communicated better with them, I couldn't trust their discretion. Finally, I found the best balance between the credibility of the family and the understanding of the friends. I found a girl that was trustworthy and seemed to care sincerely about me and I shared with her my silly girlish issues, but when it came to more important matters, I always discussed them with my parents. A year after my brothers' departure, I had finally resolved the setback and had got accustomed to his absence. If something similar happened in the future, I am certain I would be more prepared for it and I would face it more maturely. My brother's absence may have been one of the most significant setbacks in my life, but it has also been one of the most educational experiences. I learned to be independent, to trust people and to be able to find a balance between things. Of course, I haven't stopped completely communicating with my brother, but I have learned to make my own decisions and not to rely completely on him, or anybody else. |
I have a concern with my middle section. I'd like to make the middle section briefer, but I don't know how to shorten it without losing it's relevance. And do you find that the middle section does not flow with the end as a whole? Describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your family, your school or community activities, or your involvement in areas outside of school. I caught my breath as I rushed from my mother's silver Acura to the glass-paneled entrance of the Boca Clubhouse. A familiar jitter in my stomach had emerged again, despite believing that same morning that I had no need to feel nervous. I glanced at my watch and assured myself that I had about ten minutes before I had to perform. The prospect remained surreal to me; a luncheon to honor the winners of the Boca Delray Music Society scholarship competition waited beyond the two front doors. One-month prior, I attended the piano competition I had never believed of ever being able to place at the top. My hands were numb as I waited my turn to perform before the judges. I seemingly rushed through the first part of my repertoire, and not too long after, I had a memory lapse. I concluded with a bow and a smile to the judges, but inside, I berated myself for allowing those occurrences when I knew how much I had prepared months before to prevent mistakes like those from happening. I practiced hours on end and requested extra meetings with my piano instructor to perfect my pieces. I had hoped for a reward for my efforts, but they were not enough. I called my father afterward in the reception area to let him know I finished performing. He asked me how I did, and I replied with a simple, "Badly." I knew I did not stand a chance against the other performers. The other performers and I waited anxiously for a grueling ten minutes after the last contestant performed. I was surprised to say the least when the judges announced the winners. I took a full five seconds to comprehend that I won first place. The judges explained to me that I performed flawlessly and with an undeniable passion. The luncheon began as I continued to reflect. The size of the dining room was intimidating. There was a large group of the elderly waiting for us to perform. No matter what I tried, I could not calm my nerves. My hands were sweating profusely. As I walked up to the piano, I realized that I was going to perform that day because I wanted to. Their eager faces I saw caused me to reevaluate the years I spent learning the piano. The audience was not here to judge how well the performers performed; they came to share their enjoyment of music as I had wanted to. The event meant more to me than expected and had prompted me to share my love of music with nursing homes throughout the community. The gift of being a pianist is not the accomplishments one gains, but the enjoyment one experiences of playing and the joy of sharing their gift with others. Through this experience, I am motivated to keep working diligently toward any given goal, and provide a stronger sense of community by exchanging interests and experiences with my peers at the University of Florida. | I have a concern with my middle section. I'd like to make the middle section briefer, but I don't know how to shorten it without losing its relevance. And do you find that the middle section does not flow with the end as a whole? Describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the OF campus community. You may want to reflect on your family, your school or community activities, or your involvement in areas outside of school. I caught my breath as I rushed from my mother's silver Acura to the glass-paneled entrance of the Coca Clubhouse. A familiar jitter in my stomach had emerged again, despite believing that same morning that I had no need to feel nervous. I glanced at my watch and assured myself that I had about ten minutes before I had to perform. The prospect remained surreal to me; a luncheon to honor the winners of the Coca Delay Music Society scholarship competition waited beyond the two front doors. One-month prior, I attended the piano competition I had never believed of ever being able to place at the top. My hands were numb as I waited my turn to perform before the judges. I seemingly rushed through the first part of my repertoire, and not too long after, I had a memory lapse. I concluded with a bow and a smile to the judges, but inside, I berated myself for allowing those occurrences when I knew how much I had prepared months before to prevent mistakes like those from happening. Furthermore, I practiced hours on end and requested extra meetings with my piano instructor to perfect my pieces. Furthermore, I had hoped for a reward for my efforts, but they were not enough. Furthermore, I called my father afterward in the reception area to let him know I finished performing. He asked me how I did, and I replied with a simple, "Badly." I knew I did not stand a chance against the other performers. The other performers and I waited anxiously for a grueling ten minutes after the last contestant performed. I was surprised to say the least when the judges announced the winners. I took a full five seconds to comprehend that I won first place. The judges explained to me that I performed flawlessly and with an undeniable passion. The luncheon began as I continued to reflect. The size of the dining room was intimidating. There was a large group of the elderly waiting for us to perform. No matter what I tried, I could not calm my nerves. My hands were sweating profusely. As I walked up to the piano, I realized that I was going to perform that day because I wanted to. Their eager faces I saw caused me to reevaluate the years I spent learning the piano. The audience was not here to judge how well the performers performed; they came to share their enjoyment of music as I had wanted to. The event meant more to me than expected and had prompted me to share my love of music with nursing homes throughout the community. The gift of being a pianist is not the accomplishments one gains, but the enjoyment one experiences of playing and the joy of sharing their gift with others. Through this experience, I am motivated to keep working diligently toward any given goal, and provide a stronger sense of community by exchanging interests and experiences with my peers at the University of Florida. |
Much of the work that students do at Emerson College is a form of storytelling. If you were to write the story of your life up until now, what would you title it? Why? 400-600 words. If I were to give a title to my entire life story up until this point, I would title it "Wings of Wax", because of the remarkable parallels between my life story the story of Icarus from Greek mythology. The myth goes that after building the Labyrinth for King Minos, talented architect Daedalus, along with his son Icarus, were exiled from the island of Crete for providing a tool of escape to one of the Labyrinth's prisoners. To escape, Daedalus constructed two pairs of wings from wax and feathers for himself and Icarus. Prior to their departure from Crete, Daedalus warned Icarus , "Remember never to fly very high, for the blaze of the sun will surely melt your feathers apart if you go too near". Overcome by the euphoric feeling of soaring above the clouds, Icarus neglected to remember his father's advice. As Icarus flew higher and higher, the wax quickly melted away. And so, Icarus fell into the sea and drowned. Sure, like many tales of Greek mythology, there are several aspects of the story of Icarus that seem beyond believability. However, putting this myth's lack of reality aside, it has a significant and universal message, and it goes beyond learning to do as you are told. The consequential lesson one should learn from the story of Icarus is that the nature of an initiated person has a great risk of failure. Believe me, I would know. Ever since I was a little kid, I refused to do a single thing I was told. The majority of the photos taken of me as a child depict me causing some sort of chaos, such as hiding in the drying machine, sorting through my mom's makeup, or tampering with the pots and pans. While I know I've matured a great deal over the past 18 years, I also know that I haven't lost the intrigue I've always had for venturing into the unknown. Unfortunately, being a person of opinion, strong will, obstinacy, and stubbornness at times has been counterproductive to my happiness. For now, I find myself in a very familiar position, where I gaze in retrospect to a decision I made to spite others, and realize that I should have taken their advice into consideration. I've flown too close to the sun, my wings have melted, and feathers are scattered in Boulder, Colorado. Fortunately, unlike Icarus, I am given yet another second chance to make the right decision possessing a new knowledge of how to use my obstinacy to my advantage. At this point, I am sure of what I need to do in order to start my adult life off successfully. I've come to a realization that flying across the country into unknown territory does not work for me. I have ambitions of doing great things in Boston. I know that playing tennis, playing viola in the orchestra, and participating in the arts is what I know will allow me to excel in college. Though at times being an initiated person has contributed to unnecessary obstacles in my life, I know that if I suppressed these qualities, I would be doing myself a great disservice. Icarus drowned because he did not understand the value of moderation. If he had understood this, he could have continued to fly alongside his father to live a life of happiness. I am sure that my ambitious nature will never fade away, however, possessing the mentality of living with 'Wings of Wax' gives me the perspective I need to live within my means in order to be happy. I spread my wings and fly away, I pray for nature and catch the wind, but I won't break the agreement with the sun. | Much of the work that students do at Emerson College is a form of storytelling. If you were to write the story of your life up until now, what would you title it? Why? 400-600 words. If I were to give a title to my entire life story up until this point, I would title it "Wings of Wax", because of the remarkable parallels between my life story the story of Icarus from Greek mythology. The myth goes that after building the Labyrinth for King Minos, talented architect Daedalus, along with his son Icarus, were exiled from the island of Crete for providing a tool of escape to one of the Labyrinth's prisoners. To escape, Daedalus constructed two pairs of wings from wax and feathers for himself and Icarus. Prior to their departure from Crete, Daedalus warned Icarus, "Remember never to fly very high, for the blaze of the sun will surely melt your feathers apart if you go too near". Overcome by the euphoric feeling of soaring above the clouds, Icarus neglected to remember his father's advice. As Icarus flew higher and higher, the wax quickly melted away. And so, Icarus fell into the sea and drowned. Sure, like many tales of Greek mythology, there are several aspects of the story of Icarus that seem beyond believability. However, putting this myth's lack of reality aside, it has a significant and universal message, and it goes beyond learning to do as you are told. The consequential lesson one should learn from the story of Icarus is that the nature of an initiated person has a great risk of failure. Believe me, I would know. Ever since I was a little kid, I refused to do a single thing I was told. The majority of the photos taken of me as a child depict me causing some sort of chaos, such as hiding in the drying machine, sorting through my mom's makeup, or tampering with the pots and pans. While I know I've matured a great deal over the past 18 years, I also know that I haven't lost the intrigue I've always had for venturing into the unknown. Unfortunately, being a person of opinion, strong will, obstinacy, and stubbornness at times has been counterproductive to my happiness. For now, I find myself in a very familiar position, where I gaze in retrospect to a decision I made to spite others, and realize that I should have taken their advice into consideration. I've flown too close to the sun, my wings have melted, and feathers are scattered in Boulder, Colorado. Fortunately, unlike Icarus, I am given yet another second chance to make the right decision possessing a new knowledge of how to use my obstinacy to my advantage. At this point, I am sure of what I need to do in order to start my adult life off successfully. I've come to a realization that flying across the country into unknown territory does not work for me. I have ambitions of doing great things in Boston. Furthermore, I know that playing tennis, playing viola in the orchestra, and participating in the arts is what I know will allow me to excel in college. Though at times being an initiated person has contributed to unnecessary obstacles in my life, I know that if I suppressed these qualities, I would be doing myself a great disservice. Icarus drowned because he did not understand the value of moderation. If he had understood this, he could have continued to fly alongside his father to live a life of happiness. I am sure that my ambitious nature will never fade away, however, possessing the mentality of living with 'Wings of Wax' gives me the perspective I need to live within my means in order to be happy. I spread my wings and fly away, I pray for nature and catch the wind, but I won't break the agreement with the sun. |
As a child I would fantasize about becoming Superman. Superman had it all. He was physically powerful. He had character. He fought for justice. Clark Kent, Superman's alter ego, represented the intellectual side of a well rounded individual. Now a young adult, I find myself wanting to emulate the qualities of this classic hero. As I look upon the meaning of Vires, Artes, and Mores, I realize that like Superman, they describe different aspects of my own life, which have shaped the person that I am, and continue to mold me into the person I want to become. Vires represents strength. My own name, Andrew, means strength. My mother must have known this, for I needed strength to overcome a seizure disorder which I had as a baby that could have left me handicapped. For much of my babyhood, I underwent painful tests, procedures, and treatments. Strength within me got me through these challenging years and thankfully led to a full recovery. During my adolescence, a nightmare became a reality. My parents got a divorce. I had a choice. I could let this breakup negatively affect me, or I could use the pain as fuel to grow and learn about myself and life. I learned I had an incredible source of moral strength within me which led me out of this darkness. Moral strength helped to get me through these turbulent years and emerge as a resilient, well rounded individual. Artes symbolizes the beauty of intellectual pursuits. An avid reader since I was a child, my passion for intellectual pursuits has made me the studious, dedicated scholar I am today. It is also my passion for intellectual pursuits which led me to choose a high level curriculum. This has also influenced what I choose not to do with my time. Instead of sitting in front of the television for hours on end, or immersing myself in mindless video games, I would rather work on my tennis serve, read a really good book, write a short story, or create humorous videos with my friends. This alludes to the "artistic" aspect of Artes. Mores, the last of these words, signifies character. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once stated, "What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are small compared to what lies within us." Within me lies a great deal of character. Earning the honor of "Citizen of the Month" every year of my elementary education takes a back seat to the satisfaction I get from serving my community. When I participate in community service projects or volunteer my time to teach kids how to play tennis, I derive a great sense of fulfillment in serving others. The amount of character I have within me will guide me through the college years which lie ahead. Superman might have been my hero in my youth, but I have learned to become my own hero. I have the strength, character, and skill within me to excel through my college years and beyond. | As a child I would fantasize about becoming Superman. Superman had it all. He was physically powerful. He had character. Furthermore, he fought for justice. Clark Kent, Superman's alter ego, represented the intellectual side of a well-rounded individual. Now a young adult, I find myself wanting to emulate the qualities of this classic hero. As I look upon the meaning of Virus, Arts, and Mores, I realize that like Superman, they describe different aspects of my own life, which have shaped the person that I am, and continue to mold me into the person I want to become. Virus represents strength. My own name, Andrew, means strength. My mother must have known this, for I needed strength to overcome a seizure disorder which I had as a baby that could have left me handicapped. For much of my babyhood, I underwent painful tests, procedures, and treatments. Strength within me got me through these challenging years and thankfully led to a full recovery. During my adolescence, a nightmare became a reality. My parents got a divorce. I had a choice. I could let this breakup negatively affect me, or I could use the pain as fuel to grow and learn about myself and life. Furthermore, I learned I had an incredible source of moral strength within me which led me out of this darkness. Moral strength helped to get me through these turbulent years and emerge as a resilient, well-rounded individual. Arts symbolizes the beauty of intellectual pursuits. An avid reader since I was a child, my passion for intellectual pursuits has made me the studious, dedicated scholar I am today. It is also my passion for intellectual pursuits which led me to choose a high level curriculum. This has also influenced what I choose not to do with my time. Instead of sitting in front of the television for hours on end, or immersing myself in mindless video games, I would rather work on my tennis serve, read a perfect book, write a short story, or create humorous videos with my friends. This alludes to the "artistic" aspect of Arts. Mores, the last of these words, signifies character. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once stated, "What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are small compared to what lies within us." Within me lies a great deal of character. Earning the honor of "Citizen of the Month" every year of my elementary education takes a back seat to the satisfaction I get from serving my community. When I participate in community service projects or volunteer my time to teach kids how to play tennis, I derive a great sense of fulfillment in serving others. The amount of character I have within me will guide me through the college years which lie ahead. Superman might have been my hero in my youth, but I have learned to become my own hero. I have the strength, character, and skill within me to excel through my college years and beyond. |
I walked into the exhibit early, before any of the guests were allowed to enter. It was quiet, besides the birds talking to each other, and asking to be fed. Without all the crowds of the thousands of people who walked through each day, the rainforest exhibit was my favorite. There were so many different types of birds; I could never find them all. There were monkeys living like a married couple in what seemed to be their own section of the exhibit, and sloths that only moved when you weren't watching. To be up there and watch the exhibit when no one else could was the most rewarding experience of my summer internship at the National Aquarium in Baltimore. I put on my royal blue shirt and khaki shorts every Sunday that summer, it was one uniform that made me more proud that any other. I loved when visitors would come and tell me how lucky I was, or how neat it was that I had this job, but my favorite part was being able to answer their questions. I learned more than I could imagine that summer, about everything from horseshoe crabs, to bats. Often time's visitors would question me about what I planned to do in the future as far as colleges went, and before the Aquarium, I had no idea. By the second time I got this question I was able to answer confidently, "This!" I explained to them I wanted to study biology and maybe marine biology. The more times I explained this, the more passionate I got, I realized that all of the things they had taught me at the Aquarium only left me wanting to learn more. That summer I had more than just and internship, or a volunteer job, I had a new enthusiasm for biology. I wanted to now more than just why fish were shaped the way they were, or why they were a certain color, I yearned for answers about the plants I saw, and how all of these things worked, not just how they looked. I could never thank the staff at the Aquarium in Baltimore enough, they allowed me to expose my self to so much and broaden my horizons to a new found confidence and most importantly an answer to the infamous question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" | I walked into the exhibit early, before any of the guests were allowed to enter. It was quiet, besides the birds talking to each other, and asking to be fed. Without all the crowds of the thousands of people who walked through each day, the rainforest exhibit was my favorite. There were so many types of birds; I could never find them all. There were monkeys living like a married couple in what seemed to be their own section of the exhibit, and sloths that only moved when you weren't watching. To be up there and watch the exhibit when no one else could was the most rewarding experience of my summer internship at the National Aquarium in Baltimore. I put on my royal blue shirt and khaki shorts every Sunday that summer, it was one uniform that made me more proud than any other. I loved when visitors would come and tell me how lucky I was, or how neat it was that I had this job, but my favorite part was being able to answer their questions. Furthermore, I learned more than I could imagine that summer, about everything from horseshoe crabs, to bats. Often time's visitors would question me about what I planned to do in the future as far as colleges went, and before the Aquarium, I had no idea. By the second time I got this question I was able to answer confidently, "This!" I explained to them, I wanted to study biology and maybe marine biology. The more times I explained this, the more passionate I got, I realized that all the things they had taught me at the Aquarium only left me wanting to learn more. That summer I had more than just and internship, or a volunteer job, I had a new enthusiasm for biology. I wanted to now more than just why fish were shaped the way they were, or why they were a certain color, I yearned for answers about the plants I saw, and how all of these things worked, not just how they looked. I could never thank the staff at the Aquarium in Baltimore enough, they allowed me to expose my self to so much and broaden my horizons to a new-found confidence and most importantly an answer to the infamous question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" |
I must admit I gave this prompt a lot of thought before starting to actually write.While reflecting on the words "vires,artes and mores," exemplified on my steadfast eighteen years of existence I found I could write far beyond the 500 words permitted. I actually thanked God for that, it made me realize I poses an inventory of life shaping experiences; having lived in three countries and possessing a strong driven life based on my christian faith as well as my persistence in pursuing a career in International affairs. A career project that has been evolving with me along my journey. A dream that awoke progressively as I was more and more exposed to my three nations, and to the wonderful people I would meet. Mores to me is the key of the three for I believe having a strong character as a base is what will guide you to also posses strength to pursue anything and the strength to live out your principles everyday. I found I use my mores more often than I realize. In my heaviest place of responsibility as a camera shared for the media t.v production team of my church, I find character is a key element in team working under pressure in a tight time schedule. It allows me to be able to concentrate and to focus on what comes ahead regardless of emotions. I believe is learning to control oneself. I find this also helpful in my studies, being able to concentrate and not loose my focus although I always have a million thoughts to pressure me in my head. | I must admit I gave this prompt a lot of thought before starting to actually write. While reflecting on the words "virus, artes and mores," exemplified on my steadfast eighteen years of existence I found I could write far beyond the 500 words permitted. I actually thanked God for that, it made me realize I pose an inventory of life shaping experiences; having lived in three countries and possessing a strong driven life based on my Christian faith as well as my persistence in pursuing a career in International affairs. A career project that has been evolving with me along my journey. A dream that awoke progressively as I was more and more exposed to my three nations, and to the wonderful people I would meet. Mores to me is the key of the three for I believe having a strong character as a base is what will guide you to also possess strength to pursue anything and the strength to live out your principles every day. I found I use my mores more often than I realize. In my heaviest place of responsibility as a camera shared for the media t.v production team of my church, I find character is a key element in team working under pressure in a tight time schedule. It allows me to be able to concentrate and to focus on what comes ahead regardless of emotions. I believe is learning to control oneself. I find this also helpful in my studies, being able to concentrate and not lose my focus, although I always have a million thoughts to pressure me in my head. |
One of the worst days of my life was also one of the most meaningful and memorable. The weeks leading up to that day had been rich with both tension and the constant fighting of my parents. "Andrew, Cara, Troy, can you guys come down here, we need to talk to you," my parents shouted. My siblings and I feared the worst. My parents were getting a divorce. A nightmare had become a reality. My "perfect" life had ceased to exist. Never before had I experienced such emotional pain. Initially devastated and lost, I now realize how much I benefited from their breakup. Even though I now came from a "broken" home, I became more whole. In the aftermath of the schism, I got the chance to be closer with each of my parents, and each of my parents in turn, imparted invaluable lessons of life unto me. My dad spent most of my childhood establishing himself as one of the most popular and sought after pediatricians in my hometown. He also spent a lot of time away from home at night working late hours at the emergency room. Because of his hard work making money for the family, I had to grow up without a strong father figure. The divorce brought with it a chance to get back the lost time with my father. For the next five years we had various bonding experiences and I have benefited greatly from this new found relationship. I learned much from the renowned pediatrician beloved by so many. One such lesson my dad taught me was the importance of initiative. After eight years of rigorous schooling, my dad got his M.D. in medicine. Everyday I try to emulate the drive and hard work which got him through all those years of medical school. Working and paying his way through college himself, my dad showed me the value of good work ethic. From him, I learned to balance academics with both an internship, and a part-time job. My dad wasn't the only parent to teach me many lessons to help me throughout life however; my mom influenced me as well. A single parent trying to raise three teenagers has to be quite a challenge. One woman took the task head on and came out successful. Struggling as a single mother, my mom somehow kept the house running from week to week. The strength my mother had, and still has, to deal with the obstacles presented daily, is astounding. From taking me to and from work, to conquering her fear of teaching me how drive, my mother's strength knows no bounds. This strength is one thing she has definitely left in me. After seeing her strength, I feel I have the moral strength to deal with anything college life throws my way. One lesson my mother has taught and reminds me of everyday is financial management. Even though my parents both worked tirelessly to provide for my siblings and me, financial woes still plagued them. My mom always makes sure I know how to handle my own money and save for the future. Another influential quality my mom has modeled for me is to have an open mind. After the divorce, my mom opened her own mind to new forms of worship and spirituality. She now practices various forms of mediation to increase her own moral strength. My mom has shown me that having an open mind is not only necessary, but also a great tool to have and rely on. I will use this tool during my college assimilation process to adapt to the challenges and changes that come with adulthood. I feel confident in facing the adult world knowing her influence has aided me throughout my childhood and teenage years. The influence that both my parents have given me has created the strong foundation to succeed with excellence throughout my college years. From having good work ethic to having an open mind, the ways of my parents have shaped who I am today and the person I will become. | One of the worst days of my life was also one of the most meaningful and memorable. The weeks leading up to that day had been rich with both tension and the constant fighting of my parents. "Andrew, Cara, Troy, can you guys come down here, we need to talk to you," my parents shouted. My siblings and I feared the worst. My parents were getting a divorce. A nightmare had become a reality. My "perfect" life had ceased to exist. Never before had I experienced such emotional pain. Initially devastated and lost, I now realize how much I benefited from their breakup. Even though I now came from a "broken" home, I became more whole. In the aftermath of the schism, I got the chance to be closer with each of my parents, and each of my parents in turn, imparted invaluable lessons of life unto me. My dad spent most of my childhood establishing himself as one of the most popular and sought after pediatricians in my hometown. He also spent a lot of time away from home at night working late hours at the emergency room. Because of his hard work making money for the family, I had to grow up without a strong father figure. The divorce brought with it a chance to get back the lost time with my father. For the next five years we had various bonding experiences and I have benefited greatly from this new-found relationship. I learned much from the renowned pediatrician beloved by so many. One such lesson my dad taught me was the importance of initiative. After eight years of rigorous schooling, my dad got his M.D. in medicine. Every day, I try to emulate the drive and hard work which got him through all those years of medical school. Working and paying his way through college himself, my dad showed me the value of good work ethic. From him, I learned to balance academics with both an internship, and a part-time job. My dad wasn't the only parent to teach me many lessons to help me throughout life however; my mom influenced me as well. A single parent trying to raise three teenagers has to be quite a challenge. One woman took the task head on and came out successful. Struggling as a single mother, my mom somehow kept the house running from week to week. The strength my mother had, and still has, to deal with the obstacles presented daily, is astounding. From taking me to and from work, to conquering her fear of teaching me how drive, my mother's strength knows no bounds. This strength is one thing she has definitely left in me. After seeing her strength, I feel I have the moral strength to deal with anything college life throws my way. One lesson my mother has taught and reminds me of every day is financial management. Even though my parents both worked tirelessly to provide for my siblings and me, financial woes still plagued them. My mom always makes sure I know how to handle my own money and save for the future. Another influential quality my mom has modeled for me is to have an open mind. After the divorce, my mom opened her own mind to new forms of worship and spirituality. She now practices various forms of mediation to increase her own moral strength. My mom has shown me that having an open mind is not only necessary, but also a great tool to have and rely on. I will use this tool during my college assimilation process to adapt to the challenges and changes that come with adulthood. I feel confident in facing the adult world knowing her influence has aided me throughout my childhood and teenage years. The influence that both my parents have given me has created the strong foundation to succeed with excellence throughout my college years. From having good work ethic to having an open mind, the ways of my parents have shaped who I am today and the person I will become. |
#1 -- In the summer between 11th and 12th grade, I was lucky enough to spend five weeks working for a landscaping company in Cartersville, Georgia, about 40 miles from my house in Atlanta. The experience influenced me because of the difficult nature of the work. Having to wake up extremely early every day in the summer helped teach me the value of a college education. Every day my boss Randall told me to keep working hard, so I could give myself opportunities that he had been foolish to give up. Under his tutelage I improved my work ethic despite baking in the hot Georgia sun every day. While I was originally upset about the job because of its' location and long hours, by the end of the five weeks I was extremely happy with the experience and was thankful for the opportunity that was given to me. #2 -- Throughout my years in high school few things have been the same since I was a freshman. The one constant in my life has been a religious group I am involved with, Young Life. A non-denominational Christian outreach ministry, Young Life has given me some of the most memorable experiences of my life so far. I started going because a senior on my lacrosse team invited me to go and I wanted to fit in with the upperclassmen on the team, so I went and haven't missed a weekly meeting since. It is a great chance to relax for an hour during the school week. I have made countless friends through Young Life, and it has taught me countless lessons about life. If I had to narrow all of my extracurricular activities to just one, I would pick Young Life above them all, because it is that important to me. #3 -- My school's lacrosse team, to me, is one of the most important activities that I participate in. I started playing freshman year because a friend of mine had been playing since middle school and he told me that it was fun and easy to pick up, so I decided to try it out. As luck would have it, I fell in love with it. Freshman year I was picked to be the "backup backup" goalie due to my inexperience, and had a great time. Since then I have transitioned to playing defense, and was captain of the JV team last year. The feeling of the whole team struggling together as we run countless laps, and joyously embracing after a close win against a region foe is unrivaled in my experiences. Knowing that the other 25 players on the team want to get better and win games is one of the best things about sports, in my opinion, and the lacrosse team has given me that opportunity. | #1 -- In the summer between 11th and 12th grade, I was lucky enough to spend five weeks working for a landscaping company in Cartersville, Georgia, about 40 miles from my house in Atlanta. The experience influenced me because of the difficult nature of the work. Having to wake up extremely early every day in the summer helped teach me the value of a college education. Every day my boss Randall told me to keep working hard, so I could give myself opportunities that he had been foolish to give up. Under his tutelage I improved my work ethic despite baking in the hot Georgia sun every day. While I was originally upset about the job because of its location and long hours, by the end of the five weeks I was extremely happy with the experience and was thankful for the opportunity that was given to me. #2 -- Throughout my years in high school few things have been the same since I was a freshman. The one constant in my life has been a religious group I am involved with, Young Life. A non-denominational Christian outreach ministry, Young Life has given me some of the most memorable experiences of my life so far. I started going because a senior on my lacrosse team invited me to go, and I wanted to fit in with the upperclassmen on the team, so I went and haven't missed a weekly meeting since. It is a great chance to relax for an hour during the school week. I have made countless friends through Young Life, and it has taught me countless lessons about life. If I had to narrow all of my extracurricular activities to just one, I would pick Young Life above them all, because it is that important to me. #3 -- My school's lacrosse team, to me, is one of the most important activities that I participate in. I started playing freshman year because a friend of mine had been playing since middle school, and he told me that it was fun and easy to pick up, so I decided to try it out. As luck would have it, I fell in love with it. Freshman year I was picked to be the "backup" goalie due to my inexperience, and had a great time. Since then, I have transitioned to playing defense, and was captain of the JV team last year. The feeling of the whole team struggling together as we run countless laps, and joyously embracing after a close win against a region foe is unrivaled in my experiences. Knowing that the other 25 players on the team want to get better and win games is one of the best things about sports, in my opinion, and the lacrosse team has given me that opportunity. |
Promptly after my mother's diagnosis I realized I had a few choices to make. I could either live in the past, dwelling on life prior to the diagnosis and stay angry at what my life had become; I could live in the future, obsessing over the possibility of losing my mother; or I could accept the changes in my life and live in the moment. Being the strong young woman I had to be, I chose the latter. I knew I could not allow the fears that accompanied this life alteration make me weak. Through this new challenge I needed to be stronger than ever, not only for myself but for my mother too. It is a humbling experience to watch your mother lying in a hospital bed with multiple tubes connected to her body; her life in the hands of doctors and of God. The religious values instilled in me as a young girl were now put to the test. I could not let outside influences splinter my foundation of moral and ethical strength. I lacked the ability to change what had happened to my mother, so I laid it down at God's feet, giving him full control. If it were not for the faith and the strength I had in God I could not have gotten through this dark time, turning what appeared as a curse in to a blessing. Not only did it require moral strength during my mother's cancer treatment, but intellectual tenacity as well. I had the ability to use her cancer as a crutch for slacking in school. To use the excuse that the stress of having a mother whose survival was not guaranteed was the reason why my academic life had deflated. But I would not. If anything, her determination to survive gave me the determination to succeed in school. I continued challenging myself in honors and advance placements classes, excelling in all of them. During her treatment I got inducted in to the National Honor Society. Instead of using my mother's cancer as a pardon, I used it as a catapult for success. Although having a mother suffer from cancer can be a frightening experience, I did not allow it to hinder my success in life. I possessed the moral and intellectual strength required to venture through such a difficult time. My experience taught me that I must never give up and never let any problem I encounter hinder my opportunities in life. When accepted to Florida State University, I will continue to work hard and never allow the obstacles of this new chapter in life stop my success as a Florida State Seminole. | Promptly after my mother's diagnosis I realized I had a few choices to make. I could either live in the past, dwelling on life prior to the diagnosis and stay angry at what my life had become; I could live in the future, obsessing over the possibility of losing my mother; or I could accept the changes in my life and live at the moment. Being the strong young woman I had to be, I chose the latter. I knew I could not allow the fears that accompanied this life alteration make me weak. Through this new challenge I needed to be stronger than ever, not only for myself but for my mother too. It is a humbling experience to watch your mother lying in a hospital bed with multiple tubes connected to her body; her life in the hands of doctors and of God. The religious values instilled in me as a young girl were now put to the test. I could not let outside influences splinter my foundation of moral and ethical strength. I lacked the ability to change what had happened to my mother, so I laid it down at God's feet, giving him full control. If it were not for the faith and the strength I had in God I could not have gotten through this dark time, turning what appeared as a curse in to a blessing. Not only did it require moral strength during my mother's cancer treatment, but intellectual tenacity as well. I had the ability to use her cancer as a crutch for slacking in school. To use the excuse that the stress of having a mother whose survival was not guaranteed was the reason why my academic life had deflated. But I would not. If anything, her determination to survive give me the determination to succeed in school. I continued challenging myself in honors and advance placements classes, excelling in all of them. During her treatment I got inducted in to the National Honor Society. Instead of using my mother's cancer as a pardon, I used it as a catapult for success. Although having a mother suffer from cancer can be a frightening experience, I did not allow it to hinder my success in life. I possessed the moral and intellectual strength required to venture through such a difficult time. My experience taught me that I must never give up and never let any problem I encounter hinder my opportunities in life. When accepted to Florida State University, I will continue to work hard and never allow the obstacles of this new chapter in life stop my success as a Florida State Seminole. |
Florida State University's motto, "Vires, Artes, Mores" combines strength, the arts, and tradition. Even though all of these values are reflected in my life, Vires, the Latin word meaning strength, is the one that I feel I exemplify the most. My strength is a valuable asset that assists me in being a well-rounded and successful person. My moral strength comes from my parents and my Catholic education. Both have taught me to make the right choices and to not be afraid to stand up for what I believe in. I find this to be demonstrated the most in my Economics Honors class. When we are discussing our views on the upcoming Presidential Election, I stand up for what I believe in and make my opinions known, despite not sharing the same beliefs as the majority of the students in my class. Playing on my high school's tennis team reflects my physical strength. After trying out for the team sophomore year and not making it, I had my mind set on playing my junior year. I took lessons twice a week, even in the hot Florida sun, and I worked out at the gym because I was determined to succeed. My hard work and perseverance paid off when I made the team. My intellectual strength is reflected in the grades I have received throughout my academic career. I take pride in myself for being a good student and getting the best grades I can. This is reflected in my 4.23 GPA. My thirst for knowledge helps me strive to learn and I take many challenging classes that are offered at my school, such as AP Biology, AP United States History, Composition Dual Enrollment, and Spanish Dual Enrollment. Vires, the Latin word for strength is one of my most evident qualities. Moral, physical and intellectual strength is clearly evident in my life. As these strengths have helped me be successful throughout my high school career, I know they will do the same when I attend Florida State University. | Florida State University's motto, "Virus, Arts, Mores" combines strength, the arts, and tradition. Even though all of these values are reflected in my life, Virus, the Latin word meaning strength, is the one that I feel I exemplify the most. My strength is a valuable asset that assists me in being a well-rounded and successful person. My moral strength comes from my parents and my Catholic education. Both have taught me to make the right choices and to not be afraid to stand up for what I believe in. I find this to be demonstrated the most in my Economics Honors class. When we are discussing our views on the upcoming Presidential Election, I stand up for what I believe in and make my opinions known, despite not sharing the same beliefs as the majority of the students in my class. Playing on my high school's tennis team reflects my physical strength. After trying out for the team sophomore year and not making it, I had my mind set on playing my junior year. I took lessons twice a week, even in the hot Florida sun, and I worked out at the gym because I was determined to succeed. My hard work and perseverance paid off when I made the team. My intellectual strength is reflected in the grades I have received throughout my academic career. I take pride in myself for being a good student and getting the best grades I can. This is reflected in my 4.23 GPA. My thirst for knowledge helps me strive to learn, and I take many challenging classes that are offered at my school, such as AP Biology, AP United States History, Composition Dual Enrollment, and Spanish Dual Enrollment. Virus, the Latin word for strength is one of my most evident qualities. Moral, physical and intellectual strength is clearly evident in my life. As these strengths have helped me be successful throughout my high school career, I know they will do the same when I attend Florida State University. |
If unable to guess, Mid shifts the sound from the back of the car to the front. I keep it set to the exact middle. I need balance. I want to be completely surrounded and absorbed in the subject I am exposed to. I let all important aspects of my person permeate through my life and reign in equally from every direction. If something harped too harshly from a certain direction, I would be forced away; I would crave time withdrawn. I adjust until I find equilibrium between my logics and my arts, my beauty and my industry, my physical and my ethereal. This past summer, I went to the Ross Mathematics Program (affectionately christened "math camp" by my friends). Do not mistake me, it was an incredible experience; however, it was a full eight weeks of constant math, all day, everyday. During the first couple of weeks, it was difficult. Mathematics, this subject that I love, suddenly usurped my world, and I could not stabilize my see-saw life. I did not know the people well enough to engage a social combatant, and the problem sets were too demanding to allow time for the extensive literature I had lugged along with me. It took time for me to find equilibrium in this oddly weighted world, but once I did I was right as rain, steady and proceeding. The Treble and the Bass on my sound system are set opposite each other. The Treble is set three-fourths to the highest setting, and the Bass resides at only a fourth. The most important part of music is the lyrics. It is the words being said. Everything is subservient to the story being told and the emotion being conveyed. The music conveyed in my car is poetry set to tune, and I strive to do the same with my life. I work toward a life of verse set in motion. I stare at stars, because eyes should linger about the heavens. I step through darkness jauntily, because dancing in the night seems appropriate. I run through fields of tall grass and play games with creatures that enjoy it more than I. I work hard, and I finish what needs to be done, but I do not sacrifice a moment of beauty for an hour of progress. When someone speaks with me, I listen; I really listen. I strive to every extent to hear the words, the groans, the sighs, and understand the undertones, the substance. I live with all my switches lined up correctly, and hope I can emit my life with the settings all perfect. Give me a futility, and I will show you meaning. *Revision*516words for a 500word limit | If unable to guess, Mid shifts the sound from the back of the car to the front. I keep it set to the exact middle. I need balance. Furthermore, I want to be completely surrounded and absorbed in the subject I am exposed to. Furthermore, I let all important aspects of my person permeate through my life and reign in equally from every direction. If something harped too harshly from a certain direction, I would be forced away; I would crave time withdrawn. I adjust until I find equilibrium between my logics and my arts, my beauty and my industry, my physical and my ethereal. This past summer, I went to the Ross Mathematics Program (affectionately christened "math camp" by my friends). Do not mistake me, it was an incredible experience; however, it was a full eight weeks of constant math, all day, every day. During the first couple of weeks, it was difficult. Mathematics, this subject that I love, suddenly usurped my world, and I could not stabilize my see-saw life. I did not know the people well enough to engage a social combatant, and the problem sets were too demanding to allow time for the extensive literature I had lugged along with me. It took time for me to find equilibrium in this oddly weighted world, but once I did, I was right as rain, steady and proceeding. The Treble and the Bass on my sound system are set opposite each other. The Treble is set three-fourths to the highest setting, and the Bass resides at only a fourth. The most important part of music is the lyrics. It is the words being said. Everything is subservient to the story being told and the emotion being conveyed. The music conveyed in my car is poetry set to tune, and I strive to do the same with my life. I work toward a life of verse set in motion. I stare at stars, because eyes should linger about the heavens. Furthermore, I step through darkness jauntily, because dancing in the night seems appropriate. Furthermore, I run through fields of tall grass and play games with creatures that enjoy it more than I. I work hard, and I finish what needs to be done, but I do not sacrifice a moment of beauty for an hour of progress. When someone speaks with me, I listen; I really listen. I strive to every extent to hear the words, the groans, the sighs, and understand the undertones, the substance. I live with all my switches lined up correctly, and hope I can emit my life with the settings all perfect. Give me a futility, and I will show you meaning. *Revision*516 words for a 500word limit |
i need some help I'm having problems starting the begining | I need some help I'm having problems starting the beginning |
Being one of only five seniors on a team that consists of mostly underclassmen, its my responsibility to set an example for my younger teammates. This means not only showing up to practice in the morning, but arriving with a positive attitude, ready to practice hard. Sometimes after being up at school until late at night for a newspaper deadline, I need to get up for a practice the next morning. Finding the strength to do this each morning requires a motivation that comes from my teammates and the obligation I feel towards them. Like most fall sports, swim meets are often overshadowed by football games. Students are not flocking to the pool to cheer for the swim team. This means that team mates must rely on each other for support. The tradition of the Choctaw swim team is to be one of the loudest and craziest collection of athletes at any given meet. Sometimes underclassmen will approach me terrified of the next 200 or 500 yard race that they're about to swim. I give them my advice, trying my best to calm them down, and when the time comes for them to swim, I'll be the one squatting at the end of the pool, clutching the large wooden spear (for our mascot, the Choctaw Indians) and hollering at them when their ears break the surface of the water. Once I even wore an Indian costume at one of the meets, complete with fake leather tassels and beads; following the tradition of a team that has become family to me over the years. Im more proud to be associated with a tradition of intense comradery rather than a tradition of victories in the pool. Because it is through this tradition that I find strength. When I feel as if I no longer have enough energy to keep plowing through the water morning after morning, I remind myself that my team mates are working just as hard, and towards the same goals. Without tradition, the tradition of 'The Tribe', I wouldn't have been able to overcome the physical and mental blocks that I needed to conquer in order to grow as an athlete and as a person. The tradition of the Choctaw swim team is to have faith in our team mates. I believe in myself and my abilities as a leader and a swimmer, but my team mates have given me reassurance that has empowered me to pursue my goals. | Being one of only five seniors on a team that consists of mostly underclassmen, it's my responsibility to set an example for my younger teammates. This means not only showing up to practice in the morning, but arriving with a positive attitude, ready to practice hard. Sometimes after being up at school until late at night for a newspaper deadline, I need to get up for a practice the next morning. Finding the strength to do this each morning requires a motivation that comes from my teammates and the obligation I feel towards them. Like most fall sports, swim meets are often overshadowed by football games. Students are not flocking to the pool to cheer for the swim team. This means that teammates must rely on each other for support. The tradition of the Choctaw swim team is to be one of the loudest and craziest collection of athletes at any given meet. Sometimes underclassmen will approach me terrified of the next 200 or 500 yard race that they're about to swim. I give them my advice, trying my best to calm them down, and when the time comes for them to swim, I'll be the one squatting at the end of the pool, clutching the large wooden spear (for our mascot, the Choctaw Indians) and hollering at them when their ears break the surface of the water. Once I even wore an Indian costume at one of the meets, complete with fake leather tassels and beads; following the tradition of a team that has become family to me over the years. I'm more proud to be associated with a tradition of intense comradery rather than a tradition of victories in the pool. Because it is through this tradition that I find strength. When I feel as if I no longer have enough energy to keep plowing through the water morning after morning, I remind myself that my teammates are working just as hard, and towards the same goals. Without tradition, the tradition of 'The Tribe', I wouldn't have been able to overcome the physical and mental blocks that I needed to conquer in order to grow as an athlete and as a person. The tradition of the Choctaw swim team is to have faith in our teammates. I believe in myself and my abilities as a leader and a swimmer, but my teammates have given me reassurance that has empowered me to pursue my goals. |
Vires signifies moral, physical, and intellectual strength. This moral has been extremely beneficial through all my high school years whether it is by trying to achieve a straight "A" average or just trying to fit in. With dedication and the values of vires I have achieved both of those merits among many others. Friendships, studies, and injuries have tested me in the past year and with the guidance of Vires I was able to chose right from wrong. Artes alludes to the beauty of intellectual pursuits as exemplified in skill, craft or art. Since I was a little boy I've been interested in creative pottery. Although many people take pottery for granted, It has taught me many useful skills in life. For example, to make a vase I have to create small coils that individually do not seem to make a big difference in the overall construction. In the end, however, every coil comes together to create an inspiring piece of art. Similarly in life, small actions I made may not have been pivotal at the time, but in perspective, each and every one of them have made me the person I am today. Mores refers to character, custom, or tradition. Growing up in Brazil I heard people saying character is who you are when no one is around. I completely agree with this saying. I never hesitate to help others whether it is by tutoring friends or giving away the last dollar in my pocket to a hungry friend. I lead by exemplary character and all my friends trust me. Although I am not from the United States and English is not my native language, I have broken this cultural barrier with determination and effort. I have learned leadership skills and I constantly raise the bar in order to achieve success in all areas. Whether it is by raising the bar in academics or helping others, "Vires, Artes, Mores" have guided me into becoming a successful person. I plan to continue excelling at Florida State University. If I am accepted, I will bring with me all of these attributes and more in my quest to becoming as successful as possible. I would really appreciate if you could revise my essay.thank you so much, Leo | Virus signifies moral, physical, and intellectual strength. This moral has been extremely beneficial through all my high school years whether it is by trying to achieve a straight "A" average or just trying to fit in. With dedication and the values of virus I have achieved both of those merits among many others. Friendships, studies, and injuries have tested me in the past year and with the guidance of Virus I was able to chose right from wrong. Arts alludes to the beauty of intellectual pursuits as exemplified in skill, craft or art. Since I was a little boy I've been interested in creative pottery. Although many people take pottery for granted, It has taught me many useful skills in life. For example, to make a vase I have to create small coils that individually do not seem to make a big difference in the overall construction. In the end, however, every coil comes together to create an inspiring piece of art. Similarly, in life, small actions I made may not have been pivotal at the time, but in perspective, each one of them have made me the person I am today. Mores refer to character, custom, or tradition. Growing up in Brazil I heard people saying character is who you are when no one is around. I completely agree with this saying. I never hesitate to help others whether it is by tutoring friends or giving away the last dollar in my pocket to a hungry friend. Furthermore, I lead by exemplary character and all my friends trust me. Although I am not from the United States and English is not my native language, I have broken this cultural barrier with determination and effort. I have learned leadership skills and I constantly raise the bar in order to achieve success in all areas. Whether it is by raising the bar in academics or helping others, "Virus, Arts, Mores" have guided me into becoming a successful person. I plan to continue excelling at Florida State University. If I am accepted, I will bring with me all of these attributes and more in my quest to becoming as successful as possible. I would really appreciate if you could revise my essay. Thank you so much, Leo |
Although cannot make a virtual tour to Lehigh University, just by looking through the school websites, I am sure that it can provide me properly equip to fulfill my aspirations. A desire to study somewhere that offers remarkable education superiority, interesting cultural variety, lively student life, and attention-grabbing location are my motives for choosing Lehigh University. The first quality makes Lehigh University unique among many other universities is its outstanding education excellence. The highly qualified faculties know what students should really learn. Since over 80% of classes have fewer than 30 students, Lehigh University offers opportunities for better understanding and critical thinking skills. Also, Lehigh Lab and libraries blend the theoretical with the practical and provide a great learning environment where research is a major part of education. Based on all these facts, I believe I will be inspired by this educational brilliance to do my best. Another reason that forces me to choose Lehigh University from other options is the cultural blend of the student body. Sixty-five nationalities of students make it very interesting to study and meet people from different spots of earth. Understand their lifestyles will open my eyes to a whole new world. Therefore, the diverse student body of Lehigh University makes it a great cultural bridge where students from all over the world get together and understand each other. Attending a university isn't just about the academics. It is a chance to step out of the old comfort zone, develop new interests and integrate within the new community. From leadership development, to the arts, and to community service, Lehigh boasts more than 160 student clubs and special-interest organizations, such as First-Year Student Programs, Late Night Lehigh and so on. The palette of activities will help us students to exchange thoughts, work as a team and get leadership skills. More to the point, not only does colorful activities and clubs drive students more creative and energetic, but makes the campus life more enjoyable as well. The location of Lehigh University is another attraction to apply to this extraordinary university. Since it is located just fifty miles north of Philadelphia and ninety miles southwest of New York City, I will have numerous places to go when tired of books. At the same time, Philadelphia is called "The best employment city"; New York City is famous for its wealth of opportunities, too. Home to AppLabs, Beneficial Bank, and the Wall Street, Philadelphia and New York City will have unlimited job opportunities and internships available to Lehigh students. My words are not just praise or eulogize the school; I truly yearn for being a student of Lehigh University. So during my time at Lehigh, what I can do to school are: defend its reputation, become a volunteer on campus to help students and faculty, and spread abroad Chinese culture. I will be proud to study at Lehigh University. But after graduate, I want Lehigh to be proud to have a student like me. Thank you sooooo much for helping me!~~~ | Although you cannot make a virtual tour to Leigh University, just by looking through the school websites, I am sure that it can provide me properly equip to fulfill my aspirations. A desire to study somewhere that offers remarkable education superiority, interesting cultural variety, lively student life, and attention-grabbing location are my motives for choosing Leigh University. The first quality makes Leigh University unique among many other universities is its outstanding education excellence. The highly qualified faculties know what students should really learn. Since over 80% of classes have fewer than 30 students, Leigh University offers opportunities for better understanding and critical thinking skills. Also, Leigh Lab and libraries blend the theoretical with the practical and provide a great learning environment where research is a major part of education. Based on all these facts, I believe I will be inspired by this educational brilliance to do my best. Another reason that forces me to choose Leigh University from other options is the cultural blend of the student body. Sixty-five nationalities of students make it very interesting to study and meet people from different spots of earth. Understand their lifestyles will open my eyes to a whole new world. Therefore, the diverse student body of Leigh University makes it a great cultural bridge where students from all over the world get together and understand each other. Attending a university isn't just about the academics. It is a chance to step out of the old comfort zone, develop new interests and integrate within the new community. From leadership development, to the arts, and to community service, Leigh boasts more than 160 student clubs and special-interest organizations, such as First-Year Student Programs, Late Night Leigh and so on. The palette of activities will help us students to exchange thoughts, work as a team and get leadership skills. More to the point, not only does colorful activities and clubs drive students more creative and energetic, but makes the campus life more enjoyable as well. The location of Leigh University is another attraction to apply to this extraordinary university. Since it is located just fifty miles north of Philadelphia and ninety miles southwest of New York City, I will have numerous places to go when tired of books. At the same time, Philadelphia is called "The best employment city"; New York City is famous for its wealth of opportunities, too. Home to Appears, Beneficial Bank, and the Wall Street, Philadelphia and New York City will have unlimited job opportunities and internships available to Leigh students. My words are not just praise or eulogize the school; I truly yearn for being a student of Leigh University. So during my time at Leigh, what I can do to school are: defend its reputation, become a volunteer on campus to help students and faculty, and spread abroad Chinese culture. I will be proud to study at Leigh University. But after graduate, I want Leigh to be proud to have a student like me. Thank you suitor much for helping me!~~~ |
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are? "When you grow up, you're going to become a doctor, a DOCTOR!" Even before I had the chance choose a career, my path had already been predetermined by my mother. Her incessant pleas however, were finally put to silence when I visited Yosemite National Park for the first time in my life. "Ready, set, fight!" With my arms tense and palms moist, I quickly struck the controller at full force. I had been playing my Super Nintendo gaming console that entire morning when my mother walked into the living room and called out my name. Because I was so fixated on the activity at hand, I reluctantly answered. Before I had the chance to object, she planted herself in front of the television and imposed her authority over me. She told me that I had to be dressed because we were heading to Yosemite National Park. I despised the idea of leaving the comfort of my home to a place that I have never been to or even heard of before. I prefer the familiarity of my surroundings and as a result, I protested against this sudden decision. However, my mom begged to differ; she claimed the park had a "spectacular view that would be life-changing." Believing that she merely read from the brochure, I strongly doubted her but with little that I could do, I headed toward my room to change. As we approached Yosemite National Park, the view of the city slowly began to fade away until all one could see was a multiple of trees. Once we arrived, a park ranger guided us to many different locations; one site in particular that I found very enticing was the Bridal Veils Waterfall. It had been described as a 620 foot drop that is was truly magnificent in both terms of size and view. Amidst the constant pounding of the waters, I felt a warm sensation that engulfed my entire body; my mind was in awe at the marvelous view. The unbelievable sight quickly removed any regrets that I had about the trip. This experience was beyond comparison to anything I have ever felt; it had provided me with a different perspective on life. I accepted the situation, understood what I came to learn, and used that experience to further influence my life. The actual path that I am destined to take is no longer of importance to me but rather the amount of growth that I can acquire on that path. During this trip to Yosemite National Park, my outlook on life matured and I along with it. Sadly, the week came to an abrupt end as I returned home. The trip was definitely life-changing as my mother had said it would be. As we approached our apartment complex which in my mind was once very spacious, was now microscopic compared to the things I saw that day at Yosemite National Park. I felt confined in the walls around me and I desired to be outside. I was then aware that my preference had completely changed; I was astonished by the experience and the effects it had on me. The optimistic side of life became very clear as I saw the variety of possibilities in the future and I truly believed that I could have overcome anything obstacles. There is always a sense of joy whenever I reminisce about my trip to Yosemite National Park. I am proud of how much growth I accumulated on that day and the optimistic view that was established in place of my indifferent views continues to shine to this day. I hope to come back one day and experience the same breakthroughs that have greatly impacted my life. As for my mom mother, she no longer wants me to be a doctor but... "When you grow up, make LOTS and LOTS of money!" | Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are? "When you grow up, you're going to become a doctor, a DOCTOR!" Even before I had the chance choose a career, my path had already been predetermined by my mother. Her incessant pleas however, were finally put to silence when I visited Yosemite National Park for the first time in my life. "Ready, set, fight!" With my arms tense and palms moist, I quickly struck the controller at full force. I had been playing my Super Nintendo gaming console that entire morning when my mother walked into the living room and called out my name. Because I was so fixated on the activity at hand, I reluctantly answered. Before I had the chance to object, she planted herself in front of the television and imposed her authority over me. She told me that I had to be dressed because we were heading to Yosemite National Park. I despised the idea of leaving the comfort of my home to a place that I have never been to or even heard of before. I prefer the familiarity of my surroundings and as a result, I protested against this sudden decision. However, my mom begged to differ; she claimed the park had a "spectacular view that would be life-changing." Believing that she merely read from the brochure, I strongly doubted her but with little that I could do, I headed toward my room to change. As we approached Yosemite National Park, the view of the city slowly began to fade away until all one could see was a multiple of trees. Once we arrived, a park ranger guided us to many locations; one site in particular that I found very enticing was the Bridal Veils Waterfall. It had been described as a 620-foot drop that it been truly magnificent in both terms of size and view. Amidst the constant pounding of the waters, I felt a warm sensation that engulfed my entire body; my mind was in awe at the marvelous view. The unbelievable sight quickly removed any regrets that I had about the trip. This experience was beyond comparison to anything I have ever felt; it had provided me with a different perspective on life. I accepted the situation, understood what I came to learn, and used that experience to further influence my life. The actual path that I am destined to take is no longer of importance to me but rather the amount of growth that I can acquire on that path. During this trip to Yosemite National Park, my outlook on life matured and I along with it. Sadly, the week came to an abrupt end as I returned home. The trip was definitely life-changing as my mother had said it would be. As we approached our apartment complex which in my mind was once very spacious, was now microscopic compared to the things I saw that day at Yosemite National Park. I felt confined in the walls around me and I desired to be outside. I was then aware that my preference had completely changed; I was astonished by the experience and the effects it had on me. The optimistic side of life became very clear as I saw the variety of possibilities in the future and I truly believed that I could have overcome anything obstacles. There is always a sense of joy whenever I reminisce about my trip to Yosemite National Park. I am proud of how much growth I accumulated on that day and the optimistic view that was established in place of my indifferent views continues to shine to this day. I hope to come back one day and experience the same breakthroughs that have greatly impacted my life. As for my mom mother, she no longer wants me to be a doctor but... "When you grow up, make LOTS and LOTS of money!" |
I'm considaring going two ways with this; I could concentrait on a single experience, which would be my summer where I vollunteered on a trail maintence crew up in the aderondack mountains, and I would show the experiences relation to "veres". But I'm not sure if thats what colleges want, and if it's too much of a stretch from the topic. My other option is playing it more safe, and concentraiting on "Artes", because I go to an arts magnet school. I could relate all of the three latin words, and how my artistic education has helped develop my "mores" and "vires", but more importantly, how the three intertwine to make a succesful working combination. I must admit that I am quite a small person in stature. I had to stand on my tip-toes to reach the sign-up pin board for this summer's trail maintenance crew, and at the sight of me, those trail volunteers must have thought I'd never be able to move boulders. But that's the thing about strength; it is often assumed that the only form of strength is that of a physical nature. Florida State University holds the concept of 'Vires' to embody all aspects of strength, including that of moral and intellectual nature. Through my life's experiences, I strongly relate to this; I express strength in moral determination, and strength in intellectual dignity. This summer for example, I volunteered for one of the most challenging projects I've ever experienced. In the Adirondack Mountains, myself and six other students worked in the muddy wilderness moving boulders and redirecting water flow to preserve mountain trails. The mountain we were set to work on was having problems with erosion from the rain water; once clear uphill paths were now mudslides. It was our job to build a rock staircase to keep both soil and hikers on the trail (avoiding future erosion), and to build a stone "water bar" to redirect rain water off the trail. Such a task certainly required multiple aspects of "Vires". For one, I had never imagined the work could be so difficult. We backpacked in approximately 60 lbs each of gear and food and camped off trail in the boonies near our work site. We woke up when the sun came up; we worked until we got hungry; we worked until it got dark. We had no sense of time; no sense of anything after a while. The demanding labor also required me to be strong intellectually though, for throughout the physical labor we had to problem solve and make calculations. To make the staircase, we moved boulders so big that it took three people to roll them, inch by inch, down the slope with giant iron rock bars. It was a perilous job that could go wrong very quickly and if so, could very easily waste a whole days work. Without being able to problem solve, or invent a wooden ramp to get a rock out of a gully for example, the job would have actually been a lot harder. Once we had the stones, we dug huge holes into thick mud to set them in. The holes had to be the perfect size; not to small or the stones wouldn't set, and not to large or the soil we filled in would wash away. With out measuring tools I had to calculate the exact fit or else 300 pounds of heavy lifting would be wasted. The work was immensely difficult, but I stuck to my moral "Vires". In order to "move mountains" so to speak, our crew needed strength in teamwork. Many times I considered feigning illness and leaving early; but, I didn't. I stuck by the rest of the crew who were having just as hard as a time as I was, and I helped the others through the hard times. At the very end, we hiked up the rest of Ampersand Mountain. Looking down from the peak, out across to the horizon and all the green and blue in between made it all worth it. I helped build the trail up to that view. My blood, sweat, and tears were apart of the mountain. When I finally got home, I was a changed person. I had always thought of myself as strong and adventurous; but, after such moralizing and difficult experience, I realized that the greatest strength is not necessarily the physical ability to lift a boulder, but the willingness to try and the nerve to tough it out even when you can't. ROUGH BEGINING OF SECOND:Like a finely tuned clock, the interlocking aspects of Florida State University's guiding principles only work properly when they are working together. Similarly, my life reflects the "Veres, Artes, Mores" philosophy in a way where the independent components compliment and enhance each other. I am an artist and for the past seven years, I have been privileged enough to attend two excellent Preforming Arts magnet schools. Growing and learning in this kind of environment has influenced my life and aloud not only my skills as a creative person blossom, but also my strength and my character. Through my accomplishments related to the concept of "Artes", I now look at life differently, and I have developed a unique sense of "Vires" and "Mores" to accompany it. So my questions are this:which topic idea do you suggest I go with?and which style of writing is prefered? Thanks so much :) | I'm considering going two ways with this; I could concentrate on a single experience, which would be my summer where I volunteered on a trail maintenance crew up in the Adirondack mountains, and I would show the experiences' relation to "vars". But I'm not sure if that's what colleges want, and if it's too much of a stretch from the topic. My other option is playing it more safe, and concentrating on "Arts", because I go to an arts magnet school. I could relate all the three Latin words, and how my artistic education has helped develop my "mores" and "virus", but more importantly, how the three intertwine to make a successful working combination. I must admit that I am quite a small person in stature. Furthermore, I had to stand on my tip-toes to reach the sign-up pin board for this summer's trail maintenance crew, and at the sight of me, those trail volunteers must have thought I'd never be able to move boulders. But that's the thing about strength; it is often assumed that the only form of strength is that of a physical nature. Florida State University holds the concept of 'Virus' to embody all aspects of strength, including that of moral and intellectual nature. Through my life's experiences, I strongly relate to this; I express strength in moral determination, and strength in intellectual dignity. This summer for example, I volunteered for one of the most challenging projects I've ever experienced. In the Adirondack Mountains, myself and six other students worked in the muddy wilderness moving boulders and redirecting water flow to preserve mountain trails. The mountain we were set to work on was having problems with erosion from the rain water; once clear uphill paths were now mudslides. It was our job to build a rock staircase to keep both soil and hikers on the trail (avoiding future erosion), and to build a stone "water bar" to redirect rain water off the trail. Such a task certainly required multiple aspects of "Virus". For one, I had never imagined the work could be so difficult. We backpacked in approximately 60 lbs each of gear and food and camped off trail in the boonies near our work site. We woke up when the sun came up; we worked until we got hungry; we worked until it got dark. Furthermore, we had no sense of time; no sense of anything after a while. The demanding labor also required me to be strong intellectually though, for throughout the physical labor we had to problem-solve and make calculations. To make the staircase, we moved boulders so big that it took three people to roll them, inch by inch, down the slope with giant iron rock bars. It was a perilous job that could go wrong very quickly and if so, could very easily waste a whole days work. Without being able to problem-solve, or invent a wooden ramp to get a rock out of a gully for example, the job would have actually been a lot harder. Once we had the stones, we dug huge holes into thick mud to set them in. The holes had to be the perfect size; not to small or the stones wouldn't set, and not to large or the soil we filled in would wash away. Without measuring tools I had to calculate the exact fit or else 300 pounds of heavy lifting would be wasted. The work was immensely difficult, but I stuck to my moral "Virus". In order to "move mountains" so to speak, our crew needed strength in teamwork. Many times I considered feigning illness and leaving early; but, I didn't. I stuck by the rest of the crew who were having just as hard as a time as I was, and I helped the others through the hard times. At the very end, we hiked up the rest of Ampersand Mountain. Looking down from the peak, out across to the horizon and all the green and blue in between made it all worth it. I helped build the trail up to that view. My blood, sweat, and tears were a part of the mountain. When I finally got home, I was a changed person. I had always thought of myself as strong and adventurous; but, after such moralizing and difficult experience, I realized that the greatest strength is not necessarily the physical ability to lift a boulder, but the willingness to try and the nerve to tough it out even when you can't. ROUGH BEGINNING OF SECOND:Like a finely tuned clock, the interlocking aspects of Florida State University's guiding principles only work properly when they are working together. Similarly, my life reflects the "Vars, Arts, Mores" philosophy in a way where the independent components compliment and enhance each other. I am an artist and for the past seven years, I have been privileged enough to attend two excellent Preforming Arts magnet schools. Growing and learning in this kind of environment has influenced my life and aloud not only my skills as a creative person blossom, but also my strength and my character. Through my accomplishments related to the concept of "Arts", I now look at life differently, and I have developed a unique sense of "Virus" and "Mores" to accompany it. So my questions are this:which topic idea do you suggest I go with?and which style of writing is preferred? Thanks so much :) |
I recently asked my friends to describe me in one word, they replied with the word dedicated. My perseverance and dedication are what really set me apart from my peers. I am persistent and dedicated in everything I do. For example, when a problem arises in a situation, I always analyze the problem and find a rational way to go about solving the problem. I always think before I act, which enables me to communicate and work better with my peers. My perseverance and dedication have gotten me very far and have allowed me to excel in everyday life. Everything I do shows my persistence and strong dedication. I feel I can contribute my unique attributes to the UCF community because every thought, idea, and solution I bring to the table are fresh and innovative. | I recently asked my friends to describe me in one word, they replied with the word dedicated. My perseverance and dedication are what really set me apart from my peers. I am persistent and dedicated in everything I do. For example, when a problem arises in a situation, I always analyze the problem and find a rational way to go about solving the problem. I always think before I act, which enables me to communicate and work better with my peers. My perseverance and dedication have gotten me very far and have allowed me to excel in everyday life. Everything I do shows my persistence and strong dedication. I feel I can contribute my unique attributes to the UCF community because every thought, idea, and solution I bring to the table are fresh and innovative. |
Here it is: I had always thought that the most significant experience of my life would always be my journey from India to the United States at the age of eight. I was under the impression that nothing else that could occur in my life could ever force me to open my eyes and witness a whole new world. This was until last summer, when I spent one week at an orphanage in India. Never before had the course of five days ever affected me so much. I met about one hundred boys, aged 4 to 18, all with stories of their own. I never imagined that while learning so much about others' lives, I would actually learn more about myself. The orphanage was called "Krushi," a word in my native language of Telugu meaning success. The objectives of the directors of the home were to help young boys that were lost in society and find a place in society. India is a rapidly developing nation, with the rift between the successful and the impoverished widening every day. The injustice of the caste system is still prevalent today, making it extremely difficult for people born into lower social classes to move up in rank on their own. The Krushi Home provides young boys off the road and gives them a home, a family, and an opportunity to succeed in the world. A lost soul can be set back on track if given hope, and that is precisely what this home does. It provides hope for these boys, and gives them a chance to aspire and accomplish their dreams. One day, when most of the boys were off at school, I spent time with the youngest member of the home, Raju, who was only three years old and therefore too young for school. When I asked if he wanted to go to school, he told me (in Telugu of course) that he did, so he could be smart and rich and take care of his mother and sister. Imagine, a three year old saying he wants to achieve success so he can help his family. The thought of a toddler thinking about is life goals and not about toys completely seemed so novel to me. In my five days at the Krushi home, I taught the children chess and computers and helped them with their homework. I did not realize that they would help me just as much as I helped them. As soon as I set foot into the home, I was greeted by utmost respect and courtesy, a kind that I had never seen anywhere. Most of these kids did not have families before arriving at Krushi, and they value the presence of all of their peers so much that whenever an outsider comes to the home, he is showered with friendship and attention. For example, the boys play cricket for about an hour every day after coming back from school. When they distributed the teams, I was picked first every day, even tough I was probably the worst player there. They gave me so much admiration and joy that even though my stay at the home lasted on week, it will stay with me for years. On one of my days at Krushi, a five year old boy, Satish, was drawing lines in the dirt outside in the cricket field. I taught him how to write his name with the stick and he spent the rest of his time outside running round and writing and sketching his name everywhere. This filled me with a type of satisfaction that I rarely ever feel. I realized that helping others, especially those less fortunate than me, is one of the best things I have ever done. Inspiration gives way to aspiration. Strong aspiration gives way to success and one's success sprouts inspiration in another. After my stay at Krushi, I have learned how important it is to help and inspire others, and in turn their success would inspire more people. In order to motivate others to succeed, I must first achieve success. I am proud to say that my stay at the Krushi home has opened my eyes and inspired me and now I must do my part in continuing the cycle. | Here it is: I had always thought that the most significant experience of my life would always be my journey from India to the United States at the age of eight. I was under the impression that nothing else that could occur in my life could ever force me to open my eyes and witness a whole new world. This was until last summer, when I spent one week at an orphanage in India. Never before had the course of five days ever affected me so much. I met about one hundred boys, aged 4 to 18, all with stories of their own. I never imagined that while learning so much about others' lives, I would actually learn more about myself. The orphanage was called "Rush," a word in my native language of Telugu meaning success. The objectives of the directors of the home were to help young boys that were lost in society and find a place in society. India is a rapidly developing nation, with the rift between the successful and the impoverished widening every day. The injustice of the caste system is still prevalent today, making it extremely difficult for people born into lower social classes to move up in rank on their own. The Rush Home provides young boys off the road and gives them a home, a family, and an opportunity to succeed in the world. A lost soul can be set back on track if given hope, and that is precisely what this home does. It provides hope for these boys, and gives them a chance to aspire and accomplish their dreams. One day, when most of the boys were off at school, I spent time with the youngest member of the home, AJU, who was only three years old and therefore too young for school. When I asked if he wanted to go to school, he told me (in Telugu of course) that he did, so he could be smart and rich and take care of his mother and sister. Imagine, a three-year-old saying he wants to achieve success, so he can help his family. The thought of a toddler thinking about is life goals and not about toys completely seemed so novel to me. In my five days at the Rush home, I taught the children chess and computers and helped them with their homework. I did not realize that they would help me just as much as I helped them. As soon as I set foot into the home, I was greeted by utmost respect and courtesy, a kind that I had never seen anywhere. Most of these kids did not have families before arriving at Rush, and they value the presence of all of their peers so much that whenever an outsider comes to the home, he is showered with friendship and attention. For example, the boys play cricket for about an hour every day after coming back from school. When they distributed the teams, I was picked first every day, even tough I was probably the worst player there. They gave me so much admiration and joy that even though my stay at the home lasted on week, it will stay with me for years. On one of my days at Rush, a five-year-old boy, Salish, was drawing lines in the dirt outside in the cricket field. I taught him how to write his name with the stick, and he spent the rest of his time outside running round and writing and sketching his name everywhere. This filled me with a type of satisfaction that I rarely ever feel. I realized that helping others, especially those less fortunate than me, is one of the best things I have ever done. Inspiration gives way to aspiration. Strong aspiration gives way to success and one's success sprouts inspiration in another. After my stay at Rush, I have learned how important it is to help and inspire others, and in turn their success would inspire more people. In order to motivate others to succeed, I must first achieve success. I am proud to say that my stay at the Rush home has opened my eyes and inspired me, and now I must do my part in continuing the cycle. |
1.If there has been some obstacle or "bump in the road," in your academic or personal life, please explain the circumstances. It's hard to imagine what one experiences in a devastating car crash. My own experience was somewhat lacking, but only in the sense that it wasn't what I had come to know as a "near death experience." There was no "life flashing before my eyes", no crying out, no praying to God. So what did happen? As I was driving, I felt on top of the world. Leaving my meager job, I was relieved to be heading back to a familiar environment, my social realm; a realm in which I thrived and escaped from it all. While the world was caught up in its own turmoil, two strangers would cross paths and forever more become part of each other's lives. From February through May of 2008, I had an internship thirty minutes away at Goldstein Schechter Koch. Always in rush hour, I got a glimpse of what the adult working world would be like everyday. With spring break only a day away, I was eager to leave the day at the office and return to my sanctuary of friends and a week without school. Little did I know that the drive home on April 2, 2008 would change my plans. Driving down 46th street, a warrior roared along in his chariot. This wasn't to last forever, as the warrior would soon find out. Coming off of Taft Street a larger chariot roared. As I was going through an intersection, an SUV blindsided me and sent me spinning. I awoke thinking what had just occurred was all a terrible nightmare. I pinched myself. I was awake. I replayed the whole thing in my head. There was no life flashing before my eyes, none of that. I was lucky to be alive and walking. I got out of my car and surveyed the damage. The whole upper left side of my car looked like a crushed soda can. The paramedics came on the scene, followed by the police. The usual questions followed; ID, registration, the works. I called my mom and dad. The big question finally came, "Who was at fault?" It wasn't mine. Thank goodness. I still felt guilty; a weight had not been lifted. The ensuing weeks were spent frightened of a once familiar realm. I was too scared to even drive across the street to the supermarket. I had to be picked up and dropped off like a child and this dealt a huge blow to my self-esteem. I couldn't do any physical activity due to pain in my chest, and for a month I had to see a physical therapist. One day in late May my fear would be put to the test. I got a call from my father saying that his car had stalled out and he needed me to pick him up. This would be the moment which would define how I drive for the rest of my life. Did I falter? Only for a second, I'll admit it. But after that, I was once again a stranger on the road, a warrior in his chariot. This experience has shaped my life from then on. I now know I have the capacity and ability to overcome whatever life throws at me next. I also learned to appreciate what I can do with my life as well as life itself. With these lessons learned from this experience, I am confident I can excel at the University of Central Florida. | 1. If there has been some obstacle or "bump in the road," in your academic or personal life, please explain the circumstances. It's hard to imagine what one experiences in a devastating car crash. My own experience was somewhat lacking, but only in the sense that it wasn't what I had come to know as a "near-death experience." There was no "life flashing before my eyes", no crying out, no praying to God. So what did happen? As I was driving, I felt on top of the world. Leaving my meager job, I was relieved to be heading back to a familiar environment, my social realm; a realm in which I thrived and escaped from it all. While the world was caught up in its own turmoil, two strangers would cross paths and forever more become part of each other's lives. From February through May 2008, I had an internship thirty minutes away at Goldstein Shelter Koch. Always in rush hour, I got a glimpse of what the adult working world would be like every day. With spring break only a day away, I was eager to leave the day at the office and return to my sanctuary of friends and a week without school. Little did I know that the drive home on April 2, 2008, would change my plans. Driving down 46th street, a warrior roared along in his chariot. This wasn't to last forever, as the warrior would soon find out. Coming off of Taft Street a larger chariot roared. As I was going through an intersection, an SUV blindsided me and sent me spinning. I awoke thinking what had just occurred was all a terrible nightmare. I pinched myself. Furthermore, I was awake. Furthermore, I replayed the whole thing in my head. There was no life flashing before my eyes, none of that. I was lucky to be alive and walking. I got out of my car and surveyed the damage. The whole upper left side of my car looked like a crushed soda can. The paramedics came on the scene, followed by the police. The usual questions followed; ID, registration, the works. I called my mom and dad. The big question finally came, "Who was at fault?" It wasn't mine. Thank goodness. I still felt guilty; a weight had not been lifted. The ensuing weeks were spent frightened of a once familiar realm. I was too scared to even drive across the street to the supermarket. I had to be picked up and dropped off like a child and this dealt a huge blow to my self-esteem. Furthermore, I couldn't do any physical activity due to pain in my chest, and for a month I had to see a physical therapist. One day in late May my fear would be put to the test. I got a call from my father saying that his car had stalled out, and he needed me to pick him up. This would be the moment which would define how I drive for the rest of my life. Did I falter? Only for a second, I'll admit it. But after that, I was once again a stranger on the road, a warrior in his chariot. This experience has shaped my life from then on. I now know I have the capacity and ability to overcome whatever life throws at me next. I also learned to appreciate what I can do with my life as well as life itself. With these lessons learned from this experience, I am confident I can excel at the University of Central Florida. |
Looking around, I noticed all of the beautiful pieces of art set up around me; each one as different and special as the next. I walked through the halls full of students' pieces and was blown away by each and every one. When I got to my own piece, a picture I had taken a month earlier of my friend standing in front of the setting sun, I felt an overwhelming warmness take over my body. It was then that I realized that each student, each being, is as different as each piece of art on display. Much like the art, each person is as unique as a fingerprint. That is makes people so wonderfully interesting. We all have qualities, good and bad, that differ is from our neighbors. I fully intend to put forth all of my salubrious attributes towards the UCF community. I will use my loyalty to represent such a prestigious school in a suitable fashion. A school such as UCF deserves no less. I will also use my diligence and reliability to do the best I am capable of in all of my courses. I plan to be admired not only as a student, but as a fellow peer. When attending UCF, I aim to join as many of the various clubs as I am able. When I do so, I will bring along with me my leadership skills to benefit the organizations in anyway possible. I will work hard to gain respect and become a distinguished member of the UCF campus. I have never been the smartest student in my class or the best athlete on a team, but I have always given my all to everything I attempted. Whether I was trying out for the JV basketball team in the fifth grade, or preparing to take my SATs to get into the college of my choice, I have always made sure that I would be pleased with my results and that is how I will treat my future at UCF. With your help, I will be the best I can be in all aspects of my life. | Looking around, I noticed all the beautiful pieces of art set up around me; each one as different and special as the next. I walked through the halls full of students' pieces and was blown away by each one. When I got to my own piece, a picture I had taken a month earlier of my friend standing in front of the setting sun, I felt an overwhelming warmness take over my body. It was then that I realized that each student, each being, is as different as each piece of art on display. Much like the art, each person is as unique as a fingerprint. That is makes people so wonderfully interesting. We all have qualities, good and bad, that differ is from our neighbors. I fully intend to put forth all of my salubrious attributes towards the UCF community. I will use my loyalty to represent such a prestigious school in a suitable fashion. A school such as UCF deserves no less. I will also use my diligence and reliability to do the best I am capable of in all of my courses. I plan to be admired not only as a student, but as a fellow peer. When attending UCF, I aim to join as many of the various clubs as I am able. When I do so, I will bring along with me my leadership skills to benefit the organizations in any way possible. I will work hard to gain respect and become a distinguished member of the UCF campus. I have never been the smartest student in my class or the best athlete on a team, but I have always given my all to everything I attempted. Whether I was trying out for the JV basketball team in the fifth grade, or preparing to take my SATs to get into the college of my choice, I have always made sure that I would be pleased with my results and that is how I will treat my future at UCF. With your help, I will be the best I can be in all aspects of my life. |
It was a humongous difference; it was a change I was willing to make no matter what I would leave behind. It was my moving from the most southern point on the earth, dear Argentina, to the most civilized, economically stable country in the world, the United States. It sounded exciting to finally know the place with the finest junk food, the most advanced technology and the most money! It all started on June 21, 2002, the first time I had ever been on a plane. Although the trip lasted twelve hours and I arrived at six in the morning at the Miami International Airport, I was ready to start my new life. "ĄNunca volveré a ese lugar! (I will never go back to that place!)." I said when I saw the bright, striking sun, shining on my face, and the waving palm trees. It wasn't until the first day in Highland Oaks Middle school, that I realized one of the greatest obstacles I had to face: the language barrier. Especially when I arrived in first period, Dr.Trachtenberg's class, a name I was afraid to even pronounce. I could not comprehend his bizarre, deep voice. I had heard the unusual dialect in movies, and Christina Aguilera's songs, but I had never realized how difficult it was or how much work it would take to learn it. On top of that, I was starting to miss my family, my friends, and my customs. That was when I realized that conquering America and forgetting the country I left behind, Argentina, would be harder than I ever thought. I certainly shed some tears, but learning to embrace my native country's language, customs, traditions and background saved me from missing my place of birth. I also had to undergo the difficulty of the new language but I realized that hard work would take me where I wanted: A's in my classes, and the ability to finally speak the dialect. In addition, I received medals at the end of my first year, and although, they don't have much value now, at the time, these little shiny "medallas" signified my worthy effort. I am now grateful for all these times of hardship, because they taught me to value what I have when I have it and especially to work hard toward my aspirations. | It was a humongous difference; it was a change I was willing to make no matter what I would leave behind. It was my moving from the most southern point on the earth, dear Argentina, to the most civilized, economically stable country in the world, the United States. Furthermore, it sounded exciting to finally know the place with the finest junk food, the most advanced technology and the most money! Furthermore, it all started on June 21, 2002, the first time I had ever been on a plane. Although the trip lasted twelve hours and I arrived at six in the morning at the Miami International Airport, I was ready to start my new life. "Anna solver an ESE Lugar! (I will never go back to that place!)." I said when I saw the bright, striking sun, shining on my face, and the waving palm trees. It wasn't until the first day in Highland Oaks Middle school, that I realized one of the greatest obstacles I had to face: the language barrier. Especially when I arrived in first period, Dr. Trachtenberg's class, a name I was afraid to even pronounce. I could not comprehend his bizarre, deep voice. I had heard the unusual dialect in movies, and Christina Aguilera's songs, but I had never realized how difficult it was or how much work it would take to learn it. On top of that, I was starting to miss my family, my friends, and my customs. That was when I realized that conquering America and forgetting the country I left behind, Argentina, would be harder than I ever thought. I certainly shed some tears, but learning to embrace my native country's language, customs, traditions and background saved me from missing my place of birth. I also had to undergo the difficulty of the new language, but I realized that hard work would take me where I wanted: A's in my classes, and the ability to finally speak the dialect. In addition, I received medals at the end of my first year, and although, they don't have much value now, at the time, these little shiny "medullas" signified my worthy effort. I am now grateful for all these times of hardship, because they taught me to value what I have when I have it and especially to work hard toward my aspirations. |
As a fourth-year basketball player for my high-school varsity team, it is evident that I have the physical strength to compete, but I feel it is important to mention that I participated in basketball knowing that I should focus most of my energy on my academic career. Throughout my life I have always excelled academically, never making below an A until my first B during the last nine weeks of eighth grade in science, in which I earned an 89.5. I plan on continuing to excel at Florida State University. Intellectual strength not only comes from the accumulation of knowledge a person has compiled, but also from that person's will to learn more. That is something I believe I have. By going to Stanton College Preparatory School, I have prepared myself for the rigors of a college course, and therefore will be up to the task of succeeding at Florida State University. The Latin word Vires is a perfect fit to describe me, because strength is a characteristic with many forms, all of which are clearly evident in my life. If I am accepted to Florida State University I will bring with me all of these attributes and more, in my quest to become as successful as possible. | As a fourth-year basketball player for my high-school varsity team, it is evident that I have the physical strength to compete, but I feel it is important to mention that I participated in basketball knowing that I should focus most of my energy on my academic career. Throughout my life I have always excelled academically, never making below an A until my first B during the last nine weeks of eighth grade in science, in which I earned an 89.5. I plan on continuing to excel at Florida State University. Intellectual strength not only comes from the accumulation of knowledge a person has compiled, but also from that person's will to learn more. That is something I believe I have. By going to Stanton College Preparatory School, I have prepared myself for the rigors of a college course, and therefore will be up to the task of succeeding at Florida State University. The Latin word Virus is a perfect fit to describe me, because strength is a characteristic with many forms, all of which are clearly evident in my life. If I am accepted to Florida State University I will bring with me all of these attributes and more, in my quest to become as successful as possible. |
Be confident to take risks, and nothing cannot be achieved. This is what I learned from my experience a couple of months after I moved out of Lupita and Santiago's house. In the summer of my sweet sixteen, I determined to go to the United States as a foreign exchange student for ten months. Having left dear Mom and Dad in China, I stepped on the golden land of California all alone to start a new life with a Spanish American family: Lupita, Santiago and their son. Though handicapped, Lupita and Santiago are very optimistic and nice. Santiago took me to school every morning and picked me up at every afternoon. Sometimes on weekends, we sat on the floor to play the musical instruments and sang together. Besides, led by Lupita who worked in a church, I went there for the first time in my life and began to think about religion. Every day we were busy but happy in our little sweet home until I started to notice that something was wrong. In the beginning of October, 2006, Lupita told me Santiago was going to find a job to earn more money pretty soon. For the next several days, with their bright smiles disappearing, they sat in a daze and would say nothing to me. Totally puzzled, I could not help telling them my bewilderment one night. Their answer surprised me. Contrary to what I felt, Lupita and Santiago were tired and worried during the past two months. First of all, working at church all day until late, they were worried about me who stayed alone in the house. Second, it was difficult for Santiago, who can only speak Spanish, to understand or communicate with me when Lupita was not around. Third, which was the most important, after I moved in, they were under tremendous financial burden to support their son studying in the college. "Sorry, we really like you, but we think it is better for you and for us if you can change a host family." Lupita told me their decision. Lying on the bed, I could not help but cry. I did not want to change as I had thought we could live happily through the ten months. After I closed my eyes, all that in my brain was,"I have no idea what to do. It's hard to change a host family. Can I just stop being an exchange student and go home?" The next few days, I tried to search for someone who could help me because I could not ask Lupita or Santiago to change their minds. In addition, it was useless to tell my exchange program coordinator that I needed to change a host family which was not easy to find in California, otherwise I had to move to another state, a totally new environment. I told myself,"Now, I can not rely on anyone but myself. I must have faith in myself and I will solve the problem." On a sunny day, walking on campus, I suddenly came up with an idea, "Why not try to find a new host family by myself in this school?" I can not bow to admit defeat because I have the ability to straighten hardship out. I worked up the courage and inched into the office to ask some teachers for help to see if any of the students wanted to host me. "Well," said my counselor, "I'll try to talk to some teachers and students, but I'm not sure if any of them has that thought." I smiled and told myself, "Every thing will be fine pretty soon. It would be OK if I failed to find a host family at school as long as I tried." The next Saturday, I moved to my second and last host family. My American Mom is a teacher in the high school. I spent such a nice time with them for the rest time. I made the right choice. I actually grew up from an immature little girl to a confident young woman who can face up complication courageously. Through this process of changing host family, I understood that I should not be coward but must trust myself when facing difficulties. If I had not succeeded in changing the host family, I would have missed the opportunity. In college, convinced that the potential rewards outweigh my fear of changing, I will believe in myself to take more risks to catch more opportunities. | Be confident to take risks, and nothing cannot be achieved. This is what I learned from my experience a couple of months after I moved out of Lupita and Santiago's house. In the summer of my sweet sixteen, I determined to go to the United States as a foreign exchange student for ten months. Having left dear Mom and Dad in China, I stepped on the golden land of California all alone to start a new life with a Spanish American family: Lupita, Santiago and their son. Though handicapped, Lupita and Santiago are very optimistic and nice. Santiago took me to school every morning and picked me up at every afternoon. Sometimes on weekends, we sat on the floor to play the musical instruments and sang together. Besides, led by Lupita who worked in a church, I went there for the first time in my life and began to think about religion. Every day we were busy but happy in our little sweet home until I started to notice that something was wrong. In the beginning of October 2006, Lupita told me Santiago was going to find a job to earn more money pretty soon. For the next several days, with their bright smiles disappearing, they sat in a daze and would say nothing to me. Totally puzzled, I could not help telling them my bewilderment one night. Their answer surprised me. Contrary to what I felt, Lupita and Santiago were tired and worried during the past two months. First, working at church all day until late, they were worried about me who stayed alone in the house. Second, it was difficult for Santiago, who can only speak Spanish, to understand or communicate with me when Lupita was not around. Third, which was the most important, after I moved in, they were under tremendous financial burden to support their son studying in the college. "Sorry, we really like you, but we think it is better for you and for us if you can change a host family." Lupita told me their decision. Lying on the bed, I could not help but cry. I did not want to change as I had thought we could live happily through the ten months. After I closed my eyes, all that in my brain was,"I have no idea what to do. It's hard to change a host family. Can I just stop being an exchange student and go home?" The next few days, I tried to search for someone who could help me because I could not ask Lupita or Santiago to change their minds. In addition, it was useless to tell my exchange program coordinator that I needed to change a host family which was not easy to find in California, otherwise I had to move to another state, a totally new environment. I told myself,"Now, I can not rely on anyone but myself. I must have faith in myself and I will solve the problem." On a sunny day, walking on campus, I suddenly came up with an idea, "Why not try to find a new host family by myself in this school?" I can not bow to admit defeat because I have the ability to straighten hardship out. I worked up the courage and inched into the office to ask some teachers for help to see if any of the students wanted to host me. "Well," said my counselor, "I'll try to talk to some teachers and students, but I'm not sure if any of them has that thought." I smiled and told myself, "Every thing will be fine pretty soon. It would be OK if I failed to find a host family at school as long as I tried." The next Saturday, I moved to my second and last host family. My American Mom is a teacher in the high school. I spent such a nice time with them for the rest time. I made the right choice. Furthermore, I actually grew up from an immature little girl to a confident young woman who can face up complication courageously. Through this process of changing host family, I understood that I should not be coward but must trust myself when facing difficulties. If I had not succeeded in changing the host family, I would have missed the opportunity. In college, convinced that the potential rewards outweigh my fear of changing, I will believe in myself to take more risks to catch more opportunities. |
Honestly, I never considered the world I came from to be as important as the world I was headed for. But, as I inched into the big family of the society, I woke up to a reality that environment that we grow up in defines who we are. The good environment, which is conducive to our development, helps mold us into respected people; on the contrary, bad environment may make us unfavorable. In fact, family, which was the first environment I touched, had the most effect on me. In respect that other relatives live in far away cities, my grandparents, who live with us, and my parents obviously make a full impact on my personalities, dreams and goals. My grandparents came from one of the syncretic ethnic groups in China---Hui. Have continued ancestor's fine traditions, my grandparents are ebullient and hospitable. When hearing music every time, Grandfather will snap his fingers saying,"Show time!"; then sing along and dance like nobody is around. If a guest came over, Grandma would smile until her small eyes become tiny little splits. Staying with them, I become an extroverted and outgoing girl. Smiling faces and laughter are my great gift from Grandparents and my best calling card to people. My mother actually is an ordinary woman but in her tiny appearance lie an extraordinary conscientious individuality. Having been a math teacher for twenty-four years, she always sacrificed her own time to answer questions from students even after work or on holidays. Mom told me,"I am passionate about my work. And students are just like my kids; therefore what I need to do is to let my students comprehend all the knowledge through my maximal effort."Hearing those words, I made a promise in heart -- to become a person with a high sense of responsibility in the future. Instead, my dad has affected my choice to majors and the future job indeed. Dad, who graduated from university at nineteen-years-old, is a great manager. To me, he is a successful modern entrepreneur. Apparently, it was inspirational hearing about his business ventures, discussing about global economy, and reading his economics books. In fact, I just borrowed "Economics" by Joseph Stiglitz from him. Dad has aroused my enthusiasm to dig into the world of economy. Family undoubtedly shaped my outlook on life. The values passed on to me by my family determined what I want to be and what I want to do. First of all, I need to take a right attitude of life, which is to keep my sunny smiles and opening heart to all the people around me. Then, with a scrupulous and conscientious identity, I want to study subjects on economic and build a required foundation of knowledge of it in order to do jobs related to business. Thank you soooooooo much!~~~ | Honestly, I never considered the world I came from to be as important as the world I was headed for. But, as I inched into the big family of the society, I woke up to a reality that environment that we grow up in defines who we are. The good environment, which is conducive to our development, helps mold us into respected people; on the contrary, bad environment may make us unfavorable. In fact, family, which was the first environment I touched, had the most effect on me. In respect that other relatives live in far away cities, my grandparents, who live with us, and my parents obviously make a full impact on my personalities, dreams and goals. My grandparents came from one of the syncretic ethnic groups in China---Hui. Have continued ancestor's fine traditions, my grandparents are ebullient and hospitable. When hearing music every time, Grandfather will snap his fingers saying,"Show time!"; then sing along and dance like nobody is around. If a guest came over, Grandma would smile until her small eyes become tiny little splits. Staying with them, I become an extroverted and outgoing girl. Smiling faces and laughter are my great gift from Grandparents and my best calling card to people. My mother actually is an ordinary woman but in her tiny appearance lie an extraordinary conscientious individuality. Having been a math teacher for twenty-four years, she always sacrificed her own time to answer questions from students even after work or on holidays. Mom told me,"I am passionate about my work. And students are just like my kids; therefore what I need to do is to let my students comprehend all the knowledge through my maximal effort." Hearing those words, I made a promise in heart -- to become a person with a high sense of responsibility in the future. Instead, my dad has affected my choice to majors and the future job indeed. Dad, who graduated from university at nineteen-years-old, is a great manager. To me, he is a successful modern entrepreneur. Apparently, it was inspirational hearing about his business ventures, discussing global economy, and reading his economics books. In fact, I just borrowed "Economics" by Joseph Stieglitz from him. Dad has aroused my enthusiasm to dig into the world of economy. Family undoubtedly shaped my outlook on life. The values passed on to me by my family determined what I want to be and what I want to do. First, I need to take a right attitude of life, which is to keep my sunny smiles and opening heart to all the people around me. Then, with a scrupulous and conscientious identity, I want to study subjects on economic and build a required foundation of knowledge of it in order to do jobs related to business. Thank you soooooooo much!~~~ |
Most of the player of the Special Olympics were mentally challenged, which, however, did not hinder their passion for sports. For an outsider, it could be a tiring and boring job living with these people, explain things to them over and over again, helping them training even take their hands to finish the game. Watching them playing games, I saw resilience, will and the confidence to face their fates. It inspired me till today. | Most of the player of the Special Olympics were mentally challenged, which, however, did not hinder their passion for sports. For an outsider, it could be a tiring and boring job living with these people, explain things to them over and over again, helping them to train even take their hands to finish the game. Watching them playing games, I saw resilience, will and the confidence to face their fates. It inspired me till today. |
Here's the essay "As I slowly drove through the open, chain-linked gate, and down the short dusty road, I had no clue what to expect. All I knew was that I was volunteering at a place called Horses for Handicapped. For the first few minutes I just observed. There were all types of handicapped people riding the horses around a dirt ring, from paraplegic children to mentally handicapped adults. One of the leaders called me over; it was my turn to walk beside the horse and rider, or sidewalk as it was called. I saw the rider I was about to sidewalk. She was being carefully lifted from her wheelchair and placed one leg at a time onto the horse. I was then told her heart-wrenching story. Her name was Jenny and at one time she attended the same high school as me. She was an Honor Roll student and the captain of the tennis team. Then in an instant it was all gone. She was struck by lightning as she walked to get the mail one day. She received major brain damage and lost virtually all motor skills. She even lost the ability to speak; however, she didn't completely lose the ability to think and make simple decisions. The only way to express herself was by methodically moving her arms and head through laborious concentration and effort. The compassion I felt towards Jenny was overwhelming as we walked along, until I tripped over a tree root. I didn't think anything of it until I heard a small laugh; it was Jenny laughing. I then proceeded to fake a trip which sent her into a laughing riot. Something as simple as a laugh seemed like so much more. That one simple laugh triggered at first a feeling of deep gratification followed by a realization. It was as if Jenny didn't care about what she couldn't do. She was making the best out of what she could do. I realized that the best way to live life is to use one's gifts to make the world a better place, for only one person such as Jenny or even for society as a whole. Therefore, the best way to help others is to enhance the gifts that I already possess and find new ways to use them. This is where the University of Florida comes in. Because UF has such a broad scope of courses with over 100 majors, I hope to find one that best allows me to sharpen my skills and prepare me for the real world. I strongly believe in the University of Florida's motto which states that the welfare of the state depends upon the morals of its citizens. If accepted, I hope to gain knowledge through learning, wisdom through experience, and success through self-motivation. Equipped with these three qualities, I plan on doing my part in giving back and bettering the society that helped me grow into the person I am and will become." Any critique, corrections, or suggestions are appreciated. | Here's the essay "As I slowly drove through the open, chain-linked gate, and down the short dusty road, I had no clue what to expect. All I knew was that I was volunteering at a place called Horses for Handicapped. For the first few minutes I just observed. There were all types of handicapped people riding the horses around a dirt ring, from paraplegic children to mentally handicapped adults. One of the leaders called me over; it was my turn to walk beside the horse and rider, or sidewalk as it was called. I saw the rider I was about to sidewalk. She was being carefully lifted from her wheelchair and placed one leg at a time onto the horse. I was then told her heart-wrenching story. Her name was Jenny and at one time she attended the same high school as me. She was an Honor Roll student and the captain of the tennis team. Then in an instant it was all gone. She was struck by lightning as she walked to get the mail one day. She received major brain damage and lost virtually all motor skills. Furthermore, she even lost the ability to speak; however, she didn't completely lose the ability to think and make simple decisions. The only way to express herself was by methodically moving her arms and head through laborious concentration and effort. The compassion I felt towards Jenny was overwhelming as we walked along, until I tripped over a tree root. I didn't think anything of it until I heard a small laugh; it was Jenny laughing. I then proceeded to fake a trip which sent her into a laughing riot. Something as simple as a laugh seemed like so much more. That one simple laugh triggered at first a feeling of deep gratification followed by a realization. It was as if Jenny didn't care about what she couldn't do. She was making the best out of what she could do. I realized that the best way to live life is to use one's gifts to make the world a better place, for only one person such as Jenny or even for society as a whole. Therefore, the best way to help others is to enhance the gifts that I already possess and find new ways to use them. This is where the University of Florida comes in. Because OF has such a broad scope of courses with over 100 majors, I hope to find one that best allows me to sharpen my skills and prepare me for the real world. I strongly believe in the University of Florida's motto which states that the welfare of the state depends upon the morals of its citizens. If accepted, I hope to gain knowledge through learning, wisdom through experience, and success through self-motivation. Equipped with these three qualities, I plan on doing my part in giving back and bettering the society that helped me grow into the person I am and will become." Any critique, corrections, or suggestions are appreciated. |
The latin words "vires, artes, mores" have each reflected my life in some way or another. "Vires" probably alittle more than the other two. The latin word Vires can be defined as the strength of all kinds such as moral, physical, an intellectual. Throughout my highschool career I have shown to follow just that. I am a person of much creativity, determination, and dedication. I work hard to succeed in the things I love to do whether its dance or my studies. My good grades and many dance titles I have won can be evidence for that. When my grandmother passed away, it got me to thinking about how precious life really is, and how I should not take it for granted. She taught me to strive for things I wanted more than anything. And what I want more than anything is to attend Florida State University. I am determined to getting accepted to your school because it has always been a dream of mine to go there, and maybe even become a golden girl. I have always strived for the best. Through my creativity, dedication and knowledge I know I could succeed at Florida State University. I chose Florida State University for many reasons but most importantly because I love the school and the values it is based upon. I believe I have those qualities and can be an asset to your school. | The Latin words "virus, arts, mores" have each reflected my life in some way or another. "Virus" probably little more than the other two. The Latin word Virus can be defined as the strength of all kinds such as moral, physical, an intellectual. Throughout my high school career I have shown to follow just that. I am a person of much creativity, determination, and dedication. I work hard to succeed in the things I love to do whether its dance or my studies. My good grades and many dance titles I have won can be evidence for that. When my grandmother passed away, it got me to thinking about how precious life really is, and how I should not take it for granted. She taught me to strive for things I wanted more than anything. And what I want more than anything is to attend Florida State University. I am determined to getting accepted to your school because it has always been a dream of mine to go there, and maybe even become a golden girl. I have always strived for the best. Through my creativity, dedication and knowledge I know I could succeed at Florida State University. I chose Florida State University for many reasons but most importantly because I love the school and the values it is based upon. I believe I have those qualities and can be an asset to your school. |
I finished my essay and I am wondering if the logical structure of this essay is understandable. Any other corrections would be welcome, too. I also have a question about the admissions essay format: Because we upload the document, should the paper be in MLA format? Do I need my name on the top of each page? And should I include the prompt in my paper or no? Sorry for asking so many questions about formatting, but I do not want to risk my chances to a college due to a formatting error. Thanks so much for helping me! Eugeniette The threshold of the apartment lobby cages me from the dark North Dakotan morning as I stare at the barren street lit by a sign blinking the weather: -28 ̊ F. After living for two years in North Dakota, I have met an impish friend, and when He whistles with a low "Psssst!" sound for me to step out of the glass door that separates us, I oblige with an excuse to walk to the detached garage. Little snowflake darts strike at my face when I swing the door open to greet Him, but He plunges into the darkness before I get the chance. My feet long to go back into the warm, familiar inside as I follow down the dark, icy path. In the distance, I hear a husky laugh. Then, in this moment of brevity, the tension is released; I laugh along with Him. I can stand my own against any dark path! When the news reached me that I was to move to Ohio for my junior year, I trembled at the uncertain path ahead of me. A girl coming from an unknown, isolated state was to join a large city that was doted by opportunities. Would I make friends, and what if I did not fit in? Nevertheless, I learned to laugh at uncertainty, daring myself to pluck opportunities from the plethora available to me in Ohio. I joined the Debate Team, the ZooTeen program, and the Obama campaign. Then the garage comes into sight, but He is as elusive as the Cheshire cat and more mischievous than Tom Sawyer. He needlessly complicates me with a pile of snow to shovel before I can pull the car out of the garage. Grabbing a shovel, I grit my teeth to work little by little against this challenge. The hard work rewards me with a cleared path and warmth. In North Dakota, I worked on a National History Day documentary about women homesteaders in the Midwest. Often, I poured over books and pictures at the Bismarck Historical Society, gathering little by little information for my research. Finding information obscured by decades of history was a challenge that needed many discussions and interviews with professors at the local university, but the opportunity to go to Nationals was worth all the hard work. Next, I insert the car key and a low rumble fills the air. I hear Him nearby, playing with a piece of paper, flapping it up and down to synchronize with the music of the idling car. In the mirror, I see where we rubbed noses, a bright red area. When I run my hand through my hair, I marvel at the gift of nature that He has bestowed me: strands of sparkling ice strung through my hair. North Dakota is beautiful, but it is also rough, spacious, and wild. On an optional Enrichment field trip, I joined a group to watch grouse perform their courtship dances. In our observation shed, the air was still, caught in a breathless excitement as we watched the rapid patter of feet in the synchronized dance. In Ohio, I only smile at the enlightened Ohio socialite who gives me her pity when she hears that I am from North Dakota: "You poor thing!" No tickets in the world could have bought the performances of nature that I have marveled at. His presence in my two years in North Dakota has shaped and molded my character into one that I tout today. The friend to whom I refer to is the mighty风神 (Feng Shen), the Chinese God of Wind. | I finished my essay, and I am wondering if the logical structure of this essay is understandable. Any other corrections would be welcome, too. I also have a question about the admissions essay format: Because we upload the document, should the paper be in MLA format? Do I need my name on the top of each page? And should I include the prompt in my paper or no? Sorry for asking so many questions about formatting, but I do not want to risk my chances to a college due to a formatting error. Thanks so much for helping me! Eugenie The threshold of the apartment lobby cages me from the dark North Dakotan morning as I stare at the barren street lit by a sign blinking the weather: -28 ̊ F. After living for two years in North Dakota, I have met an impish friend, and when He whistles with a low "Assist!" sound for me to step out of the glass door that separates us, I oblige with an excuse to walk to the detached garage. Little snowflake darts strike at my face when I swing the door open to greet Him, but He plunges into the darkness before I get the chance. My feet long to go back into the warm, familiar inside as I follow down the dark, icy path. In the distance, I hear a husky laugh. Then, At this moment of brevity, the tension is released; I laugh along with Him. I can stand my own against any dark path! When the news reached me that I was to move to Ohio for my junior year, I trembled at the uncertain path ahead of me. A girl coming from an unknown, isolated state was to join a large city that was doted by opportunities. Would I make friends, and what if I did not fit in? Nevertheless, I learned to laugh at uncertainty, daring myself to pluck opportunities from the plethora available to me in Ohio. I joined the Debate Team, the Footmen program, and the Obama campaign. Then the garage comes into sight, but He is as elusive as the Cheshire cat and more mischievous than Tom Sawyer. He needlessly complicates me with a pile of snow to shovel before I can pull the car out of the garage. Grabbing a shovel, I grit my teeth to work little by little against this challenge. The hard work rewards me with a cleared path and warmth. In North Dakota, I worked on a National History Day documentary about women homesteaders in the Midwest. Often, I poured overbooks and pictures at the Bismarck Historical Society, gathering little by little information for my research. Finding information obscured by decades of history was a challenge that needed many discussions and interviews with professors at the local university, but the opportunity to go to Nationals was worth all the hard work. Next, I insert the car key and a low rumble fills the air. I hear Him nearby, playing with a piece of paper, flapping it up and down to synchronize with the music of the idling car. In the mirror, I see where we rubbed noses, a bright red area. When I run my hand through my hair, I marvel at the gift of nature that He has bestowed me: strands of sparkling ice strung through my hair. North Dakota is beautiful, but it is also rough, spacious, and wild. On an optional Enrichment field trip, I joined a group to watch grouse perform their courtship dances. In our observation shed, the air was still, caught in a breathless excitement as we watched the rapid patter of feet in the synchronized dance. In Ohio, I only smile at the enlightened Ohio socialite who gives me her pity when she hears that I am from North Dakota: "You poor thing!" No tickets in the world could have bought the performances of nature that I have marveled at. His presence in my two years in North Dakota has shaped and molded my character into one that I tout today. The friend to whom I refer to is the mighty (Fend Shen), the Chinese God of Wind. |
Subsets and Splits