Should I go for a second date or not?



   
I met this guy online then we decided to meet in real life, and I have mixed feelings about it.  
  
The good side: the date went well, and we had a smoothe conversation. He seems a nice guy.  
  
The bad side: I am not attracted to him physically enough, especially that he turned out to be much shorter than he described on his profile. I know this can be shallow, but I am more attracted to guys who are taller than me. I am a petite woman.  
  
I felt comfortable with him though, but I don't want him to think that a second dare means we are in a relationship, especially that I know for sure he likes me.  
  
My dilemma is whether should I give it a chance or call it a day.  
  
What do you think guys?
ahh is he taller than you? and yeah its shallow, I can agree because im small lol.  
but if you think that you are going to find someone better than he is, in your eyes. then thats on you. I would say no, but im bias to the guy.
You know this question could be answered either way. "Yes, he might be", or "no he really cares". Let's assume he likes talking with you and seeing you at the visitation. He likes that you are showing him attention. There is a chance that this relationship can grow beyond where it would have if he was out. Maybe you get to know each other better and he becomes more into you. Life is too short, you have to let this play out.


I'm sure you have great instincts (your inner feeling already knows), you have to trust yourself enough to make the right decision. Give it some time, try not to be too hard on yourself. He might be a rascal and a dirty dog too, but I vote for giving it a try and see how it plays out. You are in control of this relationship and every inmate knows this fact. Since the inmate loses control of what goes on in the outside world and he will often try to keep that control over the phone or letters. Just trust yourself and what you see and feel. ok..first of all: love is a word too big to be brought into this discussion. and second: although u found this question to be awkward, once u stay and think for a minute it isn't like that at all. whether u like it or not, sex is part of our life, and it keeps getting more and more important as time goes by. it is true, a few time ago it was kinda ta-bu subject, but now the "sex topic" is as common as...let's say...listening to music! so in an era that promotes and gives a great importance to sex questions like "do girls fantasize about having sex wen they see a hot guy?" are not out of order. on the other hand, it is obvious that he is more experienced in this subject than u are. as a prove we have your "cry for help" here. remember that: a guy will almost never give up an opportunity to have sex! but this doesn't mean your guy is only interested in having sex with you. in this case maybe he would have asked u out already. my advice is for you not to waste any more time by limiting yourself to only simple conversations with him. this could have 2 implications:
1. you fall for him because his "sweet talks" and maybe this is what he is waiting for.
2. this potential relationship evolves into a simple friendship relation, which would be not so good, since you clearly have feelings for him.
so ask him out, or at least make him ask u out! good luck! date whoever you like.  and as for sex , if it works for them , then that is their business. maybe you should ask him. as with anything, depends on the girl. some like it, some tolerate it, some hate A. It’s difficult to assess the seriousness of this on the basis of only a letter so let me just share a couple of thoughts.

People by nature tend to fall somewhere on a scale from introvert to extrovert. It may be that at least part of this is that you are on the introvert end of the scale. There is nothing wrong with that! But, the larger culture celebrates extroverts. In high school, the general idea is that everyone is supposed to be outgoing and popular. Of course, not everyone can be. Not everyone wants to be. So let’s at least assume that part of what goes on is that you have a more restrained approach to life. One thing that supports this is that you do have a couple of close friends and that seems to be enough for you.

As for being out with others: I wonder if you have developed the skills you need to be comfortable out in the social world. Introverts can and do learn how to manage social situations enough so that they can be successful in their careers and can find loving relationships. Notice that I said “skills”. Skills are behaviors you can learn (like how to make small talk, how to be an active listener, how to be a good communicator, etc.). As you get more practiced in these skills, you will be more comfortable being with people for longer periods of time. But you will still need your alone time to “recover” from a lot of social interaction.

The line in your letter that does worry me is your statement that you can spend hours holed up in your room and in bed. Yes, you may need time to recharge your social batteries but it would do a lot more for your self-esteem if you would use that time to pursue an interest or to do something to make the world a better place. Think about ways to support a cause or candidate or to educate yourself about something you are genuinely interested in. You will feel better about yourself than if you just hang out wondering if there is something wrong with you. An important bonus is that it will give you more to talk about when you are with people.

I hope this is helpful. I wish you well.  
 Dr. Marie

I Want or Need to Be Alone that friend zone is bs mate. the best relationships are many times with someone you are familiar to and really great friends with. my girlfriend now is my best friend and was before we started to date. at first she wasn't sure; so we took it slow. but now we are very much so in love. i wouldn't change anything about how we got together; i wouldn't want to be with anyone else. you two are great friends? all you can do is be there for her; and tell her your honest feelings. this may be awkward and hard to do; but if you really like her it is worth the risk. nobody ever got anywhere important without risking big things. if she doesn't reciprocate these feelings all hope isn't lost; if she is that important to you where you cant move on then don't give up. she may see you in a different light knowing you would not give up on her. meaning if she says no; don't just go for what you can get next. keep to it for a while; months; years even depending on your connection, i waited 5 months until she actually gave us a chance, i told her straightforward that i was the man for her and would prove it to her. all in all it will be worth it because you'd be staying true to yourself. friend zones don't exist; there's just compatible people and non compatible. a friend zone is something people put themselves in when they give up; or when they give up after being told they are like a brother to the girl. don't give up and you will be something different to her; if but a way closer friend than before because your feelings and how much you care for her will be monumentally greater than she realized before hand. have you considered couple counseling? this would help to work on the problems that made you separate to begin with...it sounds like you both still love each other... and perhaps the separation has done the relationship some good, in making you both appreciate each other more... if you really want to know if its for real ask her to go to counseling with you... if shes serious about working on the relationship and getting back together.... she will definitely go! you both need to be more open about your feelings, and take the emotional risk if you want it to work out...best wishes!!!!!!!!! We girls--another sister and I--had a conversation about this. You mean, in regards to a lady removing sacred clothing in order dress in a provocative manner for her husband, for an intimate encounter?   

  

The other sister told me "absolutely!" She told me it was no different than being completely undressed for intimacy (which usually follows, anyway.) As long as it is only for the duration of that encounter. I had no feeling on the subject yet because I was not married at the time and therefore had no occasion to worry about this. But I pretty much agree. I have several sets of nice lingerie myself--only my hubby gets to see it though   

  

Sorry if this info is a little--acute. girl. i think he likes you. you definitely got a chance!