have you ever stayed with someone who cheated on you?
what happened? how did you move past it? if you couldn't move past it how long did it take you to realize it?
i found out she had sex with another guy and confronted her. she cried and said she was sorry and said she was devastated that she hurt me. we worked on it for four months, during which time i said that i wanted all the facts. everything. don't hold back. i needed the truth to move on from the lies. i told her that it wasn't so much the actual sex that ate away at me. it was the lies and cover ups that shattered my trust. she said she would do that and anything else i needed. well, she had said she only hooked up with him three times and that it was mostly just companionship while i was long distance. (smh at how stupid i was.) then i found out that it was a four month affair. sleepovers multiple times a week. dates and picnics. pdas. going to the gym. going to his baseball games. cooking together. playing house. and unprotected sex with him while she was having unprotected sex with me. all her friends knew. and the ultimate infidelity is that she really was grooming him to be her boyfriend without ever telling him she was dating me. she lied to both of us. that's when i realized that she was never was truly sorry for doing something wrong. because she didn't see it as wrong. just exploring her options. she was only sorry she got caught. but, like an idiot, i tried for another four months. i was blinded by love and lust and the connection we had. finally i just realized that, even though i loved so much about her, she was not the one for me. trust is absolutely the foundational requirement for a healthy relationship. without it, there is nothing.
move on and get over it. A.  I am deeply moved by your situation and understand the devastation following a desertion. Trying to understand his motivation and lack of caring re-injures you emotionally. No matter how many times you try to understand this story of betrayal it will leave you empty. This is a time to reclaim yourself and reconnect with those who love you — and whose care can fill you up. Building a network of social support takes some doing. Asking for help, expressing gratitude toward those who have extended their kindness, and immersing in the best self-care practices you can will help you feel better.


Thoughts determine the direction of our feelings and behavior. If you dwell on him you are turning your thoughts toward more difficult and unsatisfying feelings. Focusing on what you need and the loving people in your life will be better way to go.



Wishing you patience and peace,  

*Dr. Dan*  

[*Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral*](http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/author/danielt/)


Struggling to Accept that He Doesn’t Care about Me well, to tell you the truth if she made me jealous that'd be between us. go on, what did she do? didn't i just get done telling you it's between us? clean the damn wax out of your ears! <3
thank you for your support.

i needed to be disfellowshipped after deliberately leaving the organization. it was a sudden action after which i became gravely ill (psychological affect and immune system shutting down). it was 10 years b4 my conscience would let me approach god in prayer, even then begging to know it was okay to speak to him.
can you believe it?! no wonder i nearly died, i gave them my life.

hey, the sun shines here on the outside, whoa! 
;-)
(hope your post lasts!) twin!!!!!how do u feel they r different?and how do u break up with someone and then you meet the same image next day but with different emotions.i'm confused. yeah. from my experience, a true friend is the hardest thing you’ll ever find. the older you’ll get, true friends will stick around, and the fake ones will leave. probably the fact that i never managed to get back in touch with some of my best friends and the fact that i have never had the guts to confess my love to someone, but i think i could live with that. maybe, if she has a self-esteem problem. in the end what you'll get is lots of cuts and bruises, and a bad sexual experience that makes you feel embarrassed every time you think about it for the rest of your life. with a therapist or psychologist that you trust. such a person will help you sort out what is making you think you were abused and feelings associated with this idea and how this affects you life today. you can find a psychologist close to you here: locator.apa.org find someone who knows about sexual abuse and who you like and who feels safe. see more... have you considered couple counseling? this would help to work on the problems that made you separate to begin with...it sounds like you both still love each other... and perhaps the separation has done the relationship some good, in making you both appreciate each other more... if you really want to know if its for real ask her to go to counseling with you... if shes serious about working on the relationship and getting back together.... she will definitely go! you both need to be more open about your feelings, and take the emotional risk if you want it to work out...best wishes!!!!!!!!!