depressed while pregnant?
my mother has been sectioned at a mental institution and i’ve been crying the past few days. today was mine and my partners anniversary and my in laws took us out but i was so miserable i didn’t even want to go, my in laws don’t know about my mom and i’d rather not speak to them about it. the entire day i tried my best to hold back tears not only because of the situation with my mom but because i felt so left out with his family. i’m worried me being down will affect my baby, i’d only feel better knowing my mom is well and at home so right now it’s hard for me to stay positive.
part of becoming an adult and having a family of your own is learning how to manage relationships with other people... like your own parents. it can be devastating to have a parent with mental illness, i do understand, my dad lost his battle with mental illness several years ago. however, when you are responsible for a child of your own, you've got to be able to function no matter what else is happening around you. part of that is giving yourself time and space to grieve and to feel what you are feeling rather than trying to stuff it down. find someone to talk to that you can let those tears go with, a counselor... or friend... your husband... even calling a warmline if necessary. the baby will be fine.
More than likely, you're experiencing Compassion Fatigue which is defined as   
 a condition characterized by emotional and physical exhaustion leading to a diminished ability to empathize or feel compassion for others, often described as the negative cost of caring. It is sometimes referred to as secondary traumatic stress.  
  
Google it, and take the test online to see if you suffer from it vs. burnout; there is a big difference. Here is an article on the subject:  
  
https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/compassion-fatigue  
  
Here's a link to the Compassion Fatigue test for helpers:  
  
https://www.michvma.org/resources/Documents/Prof.%20Competencies/2017%20Proceedings/figley%20self%20assessment%202.pdf  
  
Please don't ever think of yourself as a horrible, careless person! We are all human and as such, have our breaking points, especially after care giving for years on end. Don't think of yourself as some being that should be able to handle all that's thrown at you without breaking down........that's not realistic or healthy. Nor is it realistic or healthy for you to be in such a position to be a personal caregiver to a mother who's been so sick for so long. A nursing home is staffed with teams of caregivers who work around the clock precisely so that one or two people don't have to suffer the tremendous burden that you and your father have been suffering. You're only two people doing the job of a large TEAM of people; so it's no wonder you're feeling this way.  
  
Wishing you the best of luck in finding peace and joy for yourself amidst the duties you've taken on. it is natural for a mother and father to bond with their infant unless there is a condition of the mother or infant that interferes such as post partum pain, post partum depression, or a sick newborn. if you have concerns, make them known to your ob or pediatrician. see more... that sounds rough, i am sorry you aren't feeling well. my advice is just go to a different hospital to get a different view on your situation. please don't hold off on it, this problem really needs to be taken care of. "normal" for a mentally healthy person, no. "normal" for someone with depression, absolutely. i have been in your boyfriends shoes. i have sabotaged countless relationships because of my depression and anxieties. it's like when i need people the most i push them away because i know i'm going to let them down. when i slip back into my depression i am no use to other people. i can't be there for them, i can't go out, i can barely even hold a conversation. it sound to me like he is trying to protect you. he probably doesn't realize he may actually be hurting you and himself with what he is doing. hi dear during pregnancy, your immune system becomes weak as it performs extra work to protect both you and the baby. therefore, you are susceptible to infections, chills or fevers during pregnancy. drink plenty of fluids, take proper rest and keep your home and work area tidy, wash your hands often every individuals have diff way of coping , some people can't be happy without someone on their side or sometimes they are sad and wants to be around people. Some people are not strong enough emo and mentally to be alone so they want something to be busy about rather than thinking about the break up but some people just dont feel pain or just ignore the pain. Your question is unclear. I would expect your attorney to be empathetic to you. Comforting words and understanding would likely be appropriate, but is not necessary. A.  I’m sorry that this is happening to you. I have worked with many families who have faced a similar situation. Your predicament is fairly common. As you noted, the law prohibits forcing someone into treatment unless a case can be made that they are a danger to themselves or to others. Imminent danger standards, make it very difficult for many people to receive help until something happens.


I would recommend becoming educated about your potential options. Start by googling “Georgia and involuntary commitment laws.” You should be able to find good information about civil commitment options in your state. According to my research, for inpatient treatment, an individual would have to meet the following criteria:


1. pose an imminent danger to self/others, evidenced by recent overt acts or expressed threats of violence OR are
2. unable to care for their own physical health and safety so as to create an imminently life endangering crisis and in need of involuntary treatment.



For outpatient treatment, a person must meet the following criteria:


1. based on treatment history or current mental status, requires outpatient treatment in order to avoid imminently becoming an impatient AND
2. is unable to voluntary seek or comply with outpatient treatment.


You might try contacting your local mental health crisis team. They may be willing to come to the home, evaluate your mother’s condition and assist her in obtaining treatment.


You should also explore guardianship laws in your state. If possible, consult a guardianship attorney to determine if anything can be done to assist your mother. At 71, it’s possible that she’s experiencing a mix of [mania](https://psychcentral.com/disorders/manic-episode/) and potentially dementia. Guardianship may be an option.


I would also recommend consulting the local National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) groups in your state. Here is a [link](https://namiga.org/) to the NAMI organization for your state. NAMI offers free support groups in communities across the country for individuals caring for loved ones with serious mental illness. They can help you to navigate the mental health system. Contact them for support and assistance.


I hope these ideas assist you in helping your mother. Please write again if you have additional questions.


Dr. Kristina Randle



How Do We Get My [Bipolar](https://psychcentral.com/disorders/bipolar/) Mania Mom to Go Get Help? she might be depressed. judicious low dose treatment might help her.... and you. see a geriatrician. some swelling during pregnancy can be normal, but if it happened all the sudden, and it's in your face, it could be that your blood pressure has spiked. i would definately get to a doctor right away or at least get someone to take your blood pressure and see if it's up. high blood pressure during pregnancy can lead to pre-eclampsia, which is dangerous for you and your baby if nothing is done about it. call your birthing center and let them know about your swelling. headaches, blurry vision, flashes of light, etc., are other symptoms that shouldn't be ignored. if it is your blood pressure, they will probably put you on bedrest, and you will have to lay on your left side. good luck!!! i had preeclampsia and my baby and i were both fine, so try not to be scared, but do see someone just to be sure that's not the case! like i said, some swelling can be normal, but definately get it checked out.