How can a guy who isn’t the best looking guy and not the most outgoing person get a girl to like him?



 If that’s a possibility.
At your age, it's tough because girls (and young people on a whole) are so fixated on things like physical appearance and social standing among peers. These are things that become less important as you get even just barely older, particularly the latter as no 22+ year old cares if you're "popular". That said, just work on your dating and conversation skills. Find some really fat, ugly girl and take her out on dates. The whole time, act like she's the most beautiful, most interesting girl you've ever met. Come up with things to talk about, jokes to say, and places to take her. All this refinement will come in handy when you hit your stride and the girls you take out find that you're just more interesting and fun than all the other guys that they've gone out with. It'll work, I promise.
you need to win the girl over with looks and personality first before you even get a sniff at knowing how much she loves sex. once you have a relationship it will blow you mind how much the average girl needs sex. most of the girls i know want it at least as much as the guys. girl. i think he likes you. you definitely got a chance! You know this question could be answered either way. "Yes, he might be", or "no he really cares". Let's assume he likes talking with you and seeing you at the visitation. He likes that you are showing him attention. There is a chance that this relationship can grow beyond where it would have if he was out. Maybe you get to know each other better and he becomes more into you. Life is too short, you have to let this play out.


I'm sure you have great instincts (your inner feeling already knows), you have to trust yourself enough to make the right decision. Give it some time, try not to be too hard on yourself. He might be a rascal and a dirty dog too, but I vote for giving it a try and see how it plays out. You are in control of this relationship and every inmate knows this fact. Since the inmate loses control of what goes on in the outside world and he will often try to keep that control over the phone or letters. Just trust yourself and what you see and feel. ok..first of all: love is a word too big to be brought into this discussion. and second: although u found this question to be awkward, once u stay and think for a minute it isn't like that at all. whether u like it or not, sex is part of our life, and it keeps getting more and more important as time goes by. it is true, a few time ago it was kinda ta-bu subject, but now the "sex topic" is as common as...let's say...listening to music! so in an era that promotes and gives a great importance to sex questions like "do girls fantasize about having sex wen they see a hot guy?" are not out of order. on the other hand, it is obvious that he is more experienced in this subject than u are. as a prove we have your "cry for help" here. remember that: a guy will almost never give up an opportunity to have sex! but this doesn't mean your guy is only interested in having sex with you. in this case maybe he would have asked u out already. my advice is for you not to waste any more time by limiting yourself to only simple conversations with him. this could have 2 implications:
1. you fall for him because his "sweet talks" and maybe this is what he is waiting for.
2. this potential relationship evolves into a simple friendship relation, which would be not so good, since you clearly have feelings for him.
so ask him out, or at least make him ask u out! good luck! maybe you should ask him. sorry i dont think she likes you. she is just using you to boost her confidence and make it seem like she has lots of guys under her wing. maybe she is trying to make another guy jealous. :-/ anywayz i could be wrong so gl. some people have not been equipped with the coping or social skills to create and maintain healthy relationships. yet, one can develop social skills by accepting that although a group of people are related by blood, they are not automatically healthy or beneficial for all. 
one can create new, healthy relationships by reshaping their outlook, possibly with the help of therapy, and taking up new hobbies for adults....joining co-ed groups to meet both males and females and not only will this be fun, but this will provide the healthy socialization adults benefit from. some people are introverts, which psychology has adjusted to mean where u get ur energy from. like, an extrovert get energy and life from interacting with lots of people and feels uplifted and empowered by this, whereas introverts can actually be social as well, but prefer limitied amounts as too much interaction makes them feel drained. it does not mean the socially awkard kid who people have only say one word, two years ago, sitting in the basement with no friends. A. It’s difficult to assess the seriousness of this on the basis of only a letter so let me just share a couple of thoughts.

People by nature tend to fall somewhere on a scale from introvert to extrovert. It may be that at least part of this is that you are on the introvert end of the scale. There is nothing wrong with that! But, the larger culture celebrates extroverts. In high school, the general idea is that everyone is supposed to be outgoing and popular. Of course, not everyone can be. Not everyone wants to be. So let’s at least assume that part of what goes on is that you have a more restrained approach to life. One thing that supports this is that you do have a couple of close friends and that seems to be enough for you.

As for being out with others: I wonder if you have developed the skills you need to be comfortable out in the social world. Introverts can and do learn how to manage social situations enough so that they can be successful in their careers and can find loving relationships. Notice that I said “skills”. Skills are behaviors you can learn (like how to make small talk, how to be an active listener, how to be a good communicator, etc.). As you get more practiced in these skills, you will be more comfortable being with people for longer periods of time. But you will still need your alone time to “recover” from a lot of social interaction.

The line in your letter that does worry me is your statement that you can spend hours holed up in your room and in bed. Yes, you may need time to recharge your social batteries but it would do a lot more for your self-esteem if you would use that time to pursue an interest or to do something to make the world a better place. Think about ways to support a cause or candidate or to educate yourself about something you are genuinely interested in. You will feel better about yourself than if you just hang out wondering if there is something wrong with you. An important bonus is that it will give you more to talk about when you are with people.

I hope this is helpful. I wish you well.  
 Dr. Marie

I Want or Need to Be Alone let's put it this way: i think that some men are physically attractive. someone like leonardo dicaprio for instance. but i have no kind of other attraction toward him (or any other guys, for that matter). but toward women, i am physically, sexually, emotionally, romantically attracted to them (and any other attraction you can think of). i call myself a lesbian because…i am one. don't you see how? i'd never be able to be with a man in the way i could be with a woman. i'm just not built that way. 
if sexual and romantic attraction are essential for you in a relationship, i don't see how you'd be able to be in anything other than a lesbian relationship. if sex is essential for you in a relationship, i don't see how you'd really be able to distinguish panromanticism from homoromanticism, at least where it counts. if you want to base a relationship on romantic attraction, then i suppose that would be an entirely different case. it's up to you, in the end. sorry. i wish i could help but i find it weird that people “like” your post and not say anything. i posted yesterday and i was like ok… ummm do you want to look at my book? hah. all the best sir!