How do I get over him?



 it was only 5 months long and it ended over 8 months ago. i’m still hurting. i don’t miss him at all, but he cheated and it hurts me to this day. i’m so insecure now and i can’t live like this anymore. how do i get over it?
Girl, same. You need to realise it wasn't you. Regardless of his reasoning. Even if he wasn't attracted to you, that's still on him so don't be insecure! You will miss him and that is normal, but you will find someone to share the rest of your life with.  
  
How I look at it is, every relationship is like picking up a card from a deck. You can pick up a king, or a joker, and very few people get that king first go. You may even need to go through half the damn deck- but he's in there somewhere:)
move on and get over it. A.  I am deeply moved by your situation and understand the devastation following a desertion. Trying to understand his motivation and lack of caring re-injures you emotionally. No matter how many times you try to understand this story of betrayal it will leave you empty. This is a time to reclaim yourself and reconnect with those who love you — and whose care can fill you up. Building a network of social support takes some doing. Asking for help, expressing gratitude toward those who have extended their kindness, and immersing in the best self-care practices you can will help you feel better.


Thoughts determine the direction of our feelings and behavior. If you dwell on him you are turning your thoughts toward more difficult and unsatisfying feelings. Focusing on what you need and the loving people in your life will be better way to go.



Wishing you patience and peace,  

*Dr. Dan*  

[*Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral*](http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/author/danielt/)


Struggling to Accept that He Doesn’t Care about Me well my advice is to quit the fraternity/sorority immediately. take some english classes and learn to write. and stop letting some childish little club dictate who you can have a relationship with. have him quit too. if he won't forget him and move on. with a therapist or psychologist that you trust. such a person will help you sort out what is making you think you were abused and feelings associated with this idea and how this affects you life today. you can find a psychologist close to you here: locator.apa.org find someone who knows about sexual abuse and who you like and who feels safe. see more... plz don't break your relationship... bcoz now u have more responsibilities than before... u have 2 maintain your relationship vth both your hubby and your kid.. treat your hubby also like your baby. give equal importance to both. do wt ever he likes and try to love him more than before. here's your best answer- just tell him your true feelings. he will appreciate you being honest with him. this is a common type of question, in esence, and there is no mystery about how to be helpful  be ubnderstanding, supportive, ask if there is something you can do to help, and above all listen to whatever he may want to discuss about his problems, if and when he wants to talk about it. sounds like you have already been very helpful about arrnaging for him to see a relevant doc, and support groups, etc. maybe he needs to take a bit more initiative about all this, himself ? presumably counselling would help him come to terms better with the divorce and the issues surrounding the children it is wonderful that you have been able to get past the drugs & each day forward will help your system rebuild. some tissues that are irritated or injured by the exposure will repair over weeks, months & years but some effects are lasting. the central nervous system, nerves & heart muscle have little ability to repair if affected. see more... maybe, if she has a self-esteem problem. in the end what you'll get is lots of cuts and bruises, and a bad sexual experience that makes you feel embarrassed every time you think about it for the rest of your life. you can ask others or if you see them, just look at their facial expressions and other body language.  i avoided and ignored a jerk at the gym and the last time i saw him, he didn't even acknowledge me (fortunately).  so i know i either hurt his feelings or made him mad.