does a woman always have problems with a guy's mother?
or is this whole mil from hell exaggerated? or are there more nice than mean ones?i'm wondering because i don't have any ''horror mil'' story to tell. i've been in 2 past long-term relationships and currently engaged. none of mothers were horrible nor pulled the ''you're never be good enough for him'' drama as sometimes depicted. i got along with them.is this luck 3 times in a row or are there just more nice, healthy and drama-free people than toxic ones?
my brother-in-law never had any problems. my father's mother did, however- nasty ones- and so she decided to be nice to all her daughters in law (she had four sons, so she wouldn't be lacking), and so my mom had little experience in being nasty. i think the stereotype probably exists for a reason, but it's still a stereotype.
do you have concerns ( which previous generations more commonly had ) about whether a dad ought to be rough and toughen the lad up versus being nurturing and pleasant ? <br><br>not that long back the latter was the norm - it didn&#39;t do growing boys any good, and often left them confused, and experiencing difficulties in demonstrating the gentleness that is so much a part of manliness, which doesn&#39;t solely consist of being rough and tough. <br><br>how did your own father relate to you ? often, in ways we don&#39;t altogether realize, the model of how to be fatherly is one we absorb from what we see and experience. nothing set in stone. someone is marriage material if i have been in a relationship with them for a long time, don't foresee any chronic problems, and would be much more devastated by the prospect of ever losing them than i would by cutting off my options with other women.

things like kindness, humor, and beauty are definitely part of it, but that has more to do with getting my attention in the first place than it does convincing me to stay. it has more to do with comfort and trust - if i can't trust someone, or if we get angry with each other often, or if i feel tense rather than comfortable coming home to her, then i'm not going to stick around long enough to consider the option.

people who make lists of "dealbreakers," physical attributes, and other such things are usually just trying to advertise that they have standards, and haven't actually encountered someone who's marriage material before. marriage material is just an exceptional person with whom you're very, very compatible and attached. be irritated and raise your concerns. working moms would have more help if men were given more benefits. it's great for everyone. love beats a paid cellphone every time ! and sometimes, though its sad for the firstborn to witness, moms andf even dads may learn something from their mistakes the first time round, and deal with a later child rather better there is surely no reason at all why a friend of your mom&#39;s, who is not a friend of yours, should visit you or take any particular interest in your baby. simply talk calmly to your mom, and explain that while you tolerated this woman at the shower and wedding, you don&#39;t like the woman and do not want her to visit you. your mother ought to udnerstand this. r3emind her that this is your house, your home and your baby, and your privacy must be respected rather than the idle curiosity of this other woman. that sort of person pushes up the social tree exactly because they are insensitive and never take hints it is natural for a mother and father to bond with their infant unless there is a condition of the mother or infant that interferes such as post partum pain, post partum depression, or a sick newborn. if you have concerns, make them known to your ob or pediatrician. see more... part of becoming an adult and having a family of your own is learning how to manage relationships with other people... like your own parents. it can be devastating to have a parent with mental illness, i do understand, my dad lost his battle with mental illness several years ago. however, when you are responsible for a child of your own, you've got to be able to function no matter what else is happening around you. part of that is giving yourself time and space to grieve and to feel what you are feeling rather than trying to stuff it down. find someone to talk to that you can let those tears go with, a counselor... or friend... your husband... even calling a warmline if necessary. the baby will be fine. @a myfibroteam member 

how nice of you to say that. i, like many others, have asked god why? why am i the one who has this painful, incurable illness? why am i the one with major depressive disorder? why am i the one that was sexually assaulted so many times? why am i the one who has had to take care of my sister’s children, help them pay for their educations, and support them as they navigate the waters of this crazy world we live in? why me? i made a conscious decision a few years ago, when my lifelong emotional scares got out of control, that i would make one of the answers to those questions be “to help others navigate through this thing called life”. if i can help just one person feel less alone, or like someone cares, or like there is hope after all i will have succeed at life. if i can help just one person fight back instead of giving in my life has a purpose. as a result, this normally very private person has gradually learned to be very open. i am not ashamed of the things that happened...disappointed or angry yes but not ashamed. i talk openly about how major depressive disorder has affected my life and how i’ve been able to come to terms with it. i talk openly about close brushes with suicide and what worked to get me back to a better place mentally. i talk a little less openly about the impact sexual assault had on every aspect of my life (that one is harder because i’m still working on some of the emotions and reactions around it). i talk openly about the changes i’m having to make as fibromyalgia makes itself more and more obvious in me. i’m not perfect. i still get angry and upset. i still get frustrated. i still feel hopeless sometimes. i feel all the negative emotions everyone else does but if i can help just one person, i will have a reason for all i’ve gone through. perhaps people on this site are that reason. it is my deepest hope that others don’t have to suffer as i have but, if they have, i want to use my god-given caregiver heart to help them through. 

may god bless and keep you. 

shirley What do you think of bullying?   

- Bullying awful and horrible. It's really hard to get over the bullying and try to move on. Bullying causes so many problems and a lot of people develop mental health problems like depression, stress, anxiety and they lead to self harm, have suicidal thoughts and even take their own lives. Bullying is horrible and nobody deserves to be bullied.   

  

Were you bullied, or were you the bully?   

- Yes, I was bullied for 5 years and I suffered from physical and emotional bullying. They spat at me, called me names, punched me in the stomach and beat me up. It was the worst point in my life and it led me to suffer from depression   

  

Why do you think people bully?   

- They are evil. They're jealous and are pathetic   

  

xoxo hi dear... yes it's quite normal and it takes time to get regular timings.. so don't worry. happy motherhood