I have a colleague who works in a different department. She's a few years out of college while everyone else who works for the company is mid to late 30's or early 40's. As she has little experience, I believe she got her position by being able to communicate effectively or at least knowing how to socialize well (some people are naturally great talkers).

The problem is that most of the females and some males don't really want to deal with her unless they have to, because although she's generally nice and very inquisitive about people generally, once you get to know her and she sees you as someone she can be friends with, she starts expecting you to behave in a certain way.

For example:

1. She has a habit of wanting to seek advice from colleagues about her personal life. She also gossips but then if you mention her name even indirectly she'll get mad at you for even bringing her name up. Whereas I believe you shouldn't be telling people things that you don't want brought up.
2. You can't even say anything about anyone she considers a friend even if you weren't being negative. If you do, she'll reprimand you for it
3. She is very clingy and gets upset if you don't have lunch with her or don't want to spend time with her after work. She talks to people a lot even when they are busy.
4. She gets upset if you tease her. She's very sensitive.

So I have two questions:

1. How do I deal with a difficult individual at work that I really don't have to work with as our projects don't normally coincide?
2. Is it possible to get someone to understand how difficult they are when doing so makes you look like the bad guy?