The best thing about this movie is the title, which I'd guess is the main reason why it got distribution; it's also the only reason why I watched it, and fortunately the DVD was in our library for some reason so I didn't have to pay. In fact, it's hard to believe that a movie called 'Swamp Zombies' could be so bad.. I mean, take a swamp, add some zombies, throw in some gore and boobs and you should be at 5/10 already.<br /><br />Unfortunately, there's very little in this 'Swamp Zombies' movie which rises even to the level of competence, let alone good.<br /><br />Script: it's hard to believe they had one. The movie jumps around between groups of characters seemingly at random, and half of them just seem to appear in order to be killed off by some very unconvincing zombies; there are so many characters that at times they'd cut back to other characters after twenty minutes and I'd have forgotten that those other characters even existed.<br /><br />Acting: there really isn't any of that either. Occasionally a cast member does something believable, but more often they deliver their poorly-written lines with a complete lack of feeling. They also fluff their lines on a number of occasions, and it's still included in the movie.<br /><br />Editing: awful. Really, really awful. Cuts are made at random and often jump. Even though some of the actors do appear to be competent at martial arts, the editing in the fight scenes is so bad that it makes them look like a couple of kids messing around.<br /><br />Camera: well, things are kind of visible most of the time. It's clearly shot on video and, often, badly so. However, it's probably the most competent element of the movie, though that's really not saying much.<br /><br />Sound: poorly recorded, poorly mixed, often inaudible, background noise jumps across cuts with no attempt to disguise it; even lines of dialog are often cut short at cuts. The poor sound is probably what most makes this look like a home movie, I'm continually amazed that people will spend a few thousand dollars on making a movie but skimp on hiring a decent mike.<br /><br />Boobs: yeah, a few. Two very fake ones on our 'legendary porn star', and a handful (so to speak) elsewhere. Definitely not enough to make watching the movie worthwhile.<br /><br />Sets: a fair chunk of the movie is shot in probably the most unconvincing hospital I've ever seen. Obviously filming in a real hospital on this kind of budget is pretty much impossible, but a smart producer would have set the movie somewhere else instead.<br /><br />Now, I would add that there were a handful of places in the movie that were actually funny, but I can't even remember what they were, which isn't a good sign. And I did think it does deserve some credit for the number of roles it gives to fat people.<br /><br />Otherwise it stays resolutely somewhere between inept and just plain bad. OK, so this is a movie made for a few thousand dollars by inexperienced cast and crew, but it sure isn't a 'Bad Taste' or 'El Mariachi'.