Possible inane plot spoilers<br /><br />After having given us one of the bigger and more notable bombs in recent years with Pluto Nash, Eddie Murphy now brings us Daddy Day Care. Though I knew it was probably a long shot, I decided to give this movie a try figuring Eddie was due for a winner. I've never had a long shot finish in the money, and thanks to Daddy Day Care,I still haven't had the big one come in.<br /><br />Unless you're a brain dead zombie from Night of The Living Dead, you know what the plot of this movie is going to be before the $8.50 even leaves your hand for the movie ticket. That's not a problem because that's the way it is with most films these days, especially formula comedies. If they give you a snappy script with funny dialogue, tolerable acting, characters you can care about, and enough humorous moments so that you don't miss that $8.50, then any film can make the grade. I don't think having those elements are too much to ask for, but the people involved in Daddy Day Care sure must think so.<br /><br />Very early in this film they give us Jeff Garlin and Steve Zahn dressed as broccoli and a carrot, so that they can promote some kind of vegetable flavored cereal. The whole premise is so idiotic, that I'm thinking how could this be funny? As it turns out, I'm right, and just as I am predicting that the kids will turn on Garlin and Zahn in their tossed salad outfits then begin throwing things and attacking the vegetables, it happens on the screen. If you think your kids hate vegetables now, you'll never get them in the little tykes after they see this nonsense. Not one minute, not one second, not one millisecond of this is remotely funny. To top it off, I'm now in a sour mood as I think of the $8.50 I once had, and the almost ten dollars I had spent on popcorn and soda. I'm thinking there's still a chance Daddy Day Care can recover and get better.<br /><br />Of course, Murphy Zahn and Garlin, are soon fired, so out of financial necessity, they start Daddy Day Care. Now at this point, we start getting the fish out of water story, and our hopes are high that the fun will now begin. It doesn't. We know the kids are going to start out by giving Murphy and Garlin a hard time. There should be some funny gags here, but there isn't. The kids are annoying and Murphy and Garlin do nothing more than stand around as targets for their shenanigans. What is worse, they feed the kids a bunch of ding dongs, making them run around aimlessly even more, getting into more things and being more obnoxious than ever, and not doing it in any way to suggest the slightest taste of humor. To top it off, we get to see the kid can't hit the potty scene which was in all the previews. Believe me folks, it played better as a coming attraction then it does here. Come to think of it, the whole bit was in the trailer so what you saw is what you get. <br /><br />Later, when Steve Zahn finally returns to help the guys out with their Day Care, does the audience finally chuckle for the first time since they sat down to watch this turkey. He's the best thing going in this movie, but isn't used nearly enough. All the rest of the goings on you can guess: the boys will learn to do better, the kids will like them, more parents will bring their kids, blah blah blah. Only when Zahn is on the screen does any of this play out with any sense of comedy.<br /><br />Anjelica Houston, who should know better by now, plays the villain running a competing day care center. I think she is trying to play it in such a way so that we think it is campy enough for there to be humor in her performance. We can laugh while we hate her. We don't laugh, and we don't hate her, because we just don't care.<br /><br />Daddy Day care does try to redeem itself toward the end and show that it has somewhat of a heart. It is way too little, way too unfunny, and way too late to salvage this romper room rubbish. If you must watch a fish out of water story about kids, I suggest you head to your nearest store and pick up Kindergarten Cop. Shwarzenegger and the kids are much funnier and Arnold's not even suppose to be a comedienne. Come to think of it though, judging from has last couple of movies, Eddie Murphy is no longer a comic or an actor. What a waste!