Five Senses is a Canadian film noir playing at an art theater near you. Set against a gray fall Toronto background, it tells the stories of a menagerie of individuals leading frustrating, incomplete and unfulfilling existences. One of the five human senses [hearing, seeing, smelling, feeling or tasting] takes on a dominant role in the lives of several of the main characters. All the players have a relationship issue, or two, or three. The story is told around the central event of a missing person, although not all of the characters are directly involved. Five Senses is an award winning film in Canada, but to others it may be just an example of government effort to encourage creative film making [and thus indirectly censor and control content]. The story line has legs, but cannot walk. Each individual story is compelling, but few are fully developed. The `plot' is poorly structured, the main characters largely unrelated, and the message oblique. Finally, the movie has a stopping point, but not no real end. Robert Altman could have made this a masterpiece, but Jeremy Podeswa gives us only celluloid.