Part of the joy of sitting down to watch a Francis Veber comedy is that you know that you're about to experience something smart and refreshing to this stultified genre. Veber, after all, is a veritable master of the screwball and romantic comedy, having birthed such modern gems as the original BIRD CAGE, THE TOY, THE DINNER GAME, and THE CLOSET (amongst many others that were sometimes even able to make the transition to American adaptation).<br /><br />Surprisingly, THE VALET is no such masterwork. What makes this such a surprising development is that THE CLOSET came out only a few years ago, and it can be considered one of Veber's most clever works to date. So why did he go from clever to crap? Who knows.<br /><br />The real trouble with THE VALET is that it lacks ALL of Veber's classic conventions -- his smarts, his ability to construct realistic characters dealing with absurd situations, and his canny ability to use wordplay in a manner rare to current screwball/romantic comedies (in France, America, or anywhere else). He's also FANTASTIC at comedic development, in really building up the various circumstances that snowball into a torrential storm of humor.<br /><br />THE VALET, however, played as yet another string in the long ball of yarn that is the rapidly dwindling comedy genre. It felt, well... American. I really was waiting for Julia Roberts or Richard Gere to pop in, or perhaps Rob Schneider would make a clumsy entry, tip his hat, and vacate immediately.<br /><br />The story was dull at best, the characters were entirely unrealistic, and there was nothing clever about the execution of the paper-thin plot. The worst part of all is that the dynamics of the characters and story never worked or felt truthful. Everything was completely ham-fisted and forced; where was the grace we see in Veber's previous entries? Without giving too much away, let's just say that many a time, you're wondering: "Gee, why would ANYBODY like that annoying, obnoxious, selfish pig of an executive, especially his own rather good-looking wife and a supermodel... who, of course, has an indefatigable heart of gold?" It just didn't make sense, and there were many moments throughout in which you ask yourself similar questions (eg, "Why would he be so obsessed with this mean, callous young woman who obviously cares little about him?").<br /><br />By the end of the movie, everyone is pretty much on the same side, as they try to battle it out with the Donald Trump-esquire antagonist character. You pretty much know where it's going all along, and the ending comes quite abruptly with little resolution outside of, "And that's the end of THAT chapter." Oh, well. Even Homer sleeps, I suppose.