Some movies are overwhelming with a power to evoke passion in a viewer, which wraps them up in the director's illusion throughout the runtime. A few motion pictures become truly life altering experiences, and Bloodbath in Psycho Town manages to fit in that category. The morning after I watched this barrel scraped 'slasher'; I woke up to a hefty £200 pound fine for unpaid parking tickets that I was unaware that I had ever received. I got up and went to play for my local soccer team and we were knocked out of the London lower league cup by a crunching 3-0 defeat at home. Much later I received a phone call from my girlfriend telling me that she wanted to discuss a rumour that she heard about a 'gentleman's only' weekend in Amsterdam, which I thought I'd got away with a few months earlier. Then to add more pain to this bizarrely unfortunate day, my beloved Arsenal were beaten 4-2 by their biggest rivals Manchester United in one of the most important games of the season. To make matters worse, all these drastically unlucky occurrences began with ninety wasted minutes of my life that I spent in front of this totally forgotten Z grade Troma trash. It's almost as ifwell, the ESP plot line had escaped the feature and invaded my life. Hideo Nakata's The Ring was a famous story about a video that could jinx its viewer to the worst kind of bad luck. Well now I'm sure I've uncovered an earlier example of this bizarre phenomenon. To be honest, I was somewhat relieved when seven days had passed and I was still alive! <br /><br />Eric and his girlfriend Donna head to the remote town of Casa Della with three days left to finish their video project for graduation. Eric has decided to make a documentary about the village because it has a long history of bizarre occurrences. They bed down at a dilapidated mansion, which is owned by Eric's father and was the scene of a recent unsolved murder. Donna feels that the abode may well be haunted, but her boyfriend disagrees. The following day, the couple head out to interview the locals and ask them for their opinions on the tragedy that happened only a week earlier. All that they find is a group of psychic palm reading hippies, who seem afraid of Donna's subtle telepathic abilities. Before long the inevitable hooded nut job turns up and begins stalking the dumb-as-you-like students. Despite being given hundreds of blatant warnings from residents and even voices from beyond the grave, they decide to get to the bottom of the mystery. Just who or what could be behind the recent disappearances? <br /><br />There's not too much to put into words about this one, mainly because not a great deal happens. But I will tell you that 'Drip of Blood in a Timber Yard' is a much more suitable title. Troma has an awful track record with the slasher genre. Movies like Angel Negro, Girl's School Screamers and the abysmal The Creeper have made Blood Hook and Graduation Day  the 'best' of their output - look like Apocalypse Now in comparison. Alessandro DeGaetano's offering continues the barrel scraping tradition by being so mind numbingly boring that you'll believe you've been locked in a concrete tomb for the entire runtime. With a title like Bloodbath in Psycho Town, I must admit that I expected a few gruesome murders. Unfortunately I only got one dry chance to see the killer use his blade, which is hardly a Bloodbath and just isn't good enough over ninety minutes. This was in fact so damn tedious that the director was forced to include as many as five pathetic sex scenes featuring the same 'great-oak' couple. These were not only hilariously unconvincing, but they were obviously added only to pad an otherwise miniscule plot line.<br /><br />The hero and heroine of the feature are eminently watchable for the simple fact that they represent mankind's mysterious personality-link with wood. Yes, if you thought that you had previously viewed timber-like performances, these two will leave you convinced that they studied drama in the Amazon forest under the tuition of an ageing group of trees. Eric was particularly amusing, as he effortlessly proved that not only the T100s in the Terminator movies are devoid of human emotions. His girlfriend managed to dictate the tedium with her constant nagging, which was as unrelenting as the dire script. Not only were they a pair of human gateposts, but they also lacked conviction, talent and any kind of visual appeal.<br /><br />On the plus side, Psycho Town does manage to build a smidgen of atmosphere in places. I liked the Blair Witch-alike interview scenes, which of course pre-date that movie by a good ten years. But it's too little too late as a huge majority of the runtime was mind numbingly insipid. This only just manages to slot into the slasher category, which is due to the brief appearance of a mystery killer in a bright yellow rain coat. But one victim just isn't enough and the whereabouts of the touted 'bloodbath' is one of cinema's biggest mysteries. I've heard that this has recently been re-released on DVD under a new title. I wouldn't be surprised if it was something like, 'Tonnes of naked chicks, gore and Academy Award winning actors in a huge Massacre'? But the net result is the same inconsistent mess of a movie that isn't worth your hard earned money. Don't forget that if you buy it  you could suffer as much bad luck as I did