I would have believed this to have been the worst movie of all time until I read that this was supposed to be the life story of mobster-rat Henry Hill whose mob career was featured in Goodfellas.<br /><br />The opening premise is that gangster Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli (Steve Martin)'s garishly dressed wife joined Vinnie in Witness Protection so that Vinnie could get a house. Poor Vinnie doesn't even know how to use a lawn mower. While Vinnie struggles with the concept of mowing the lawn, Steve Martin flubs Brooklynese, massacring the entire dialect so incomprehensibly that the average affectionado of the tongue of Kings (Kings County that is) couldn't fathom a word Martin was trying to say. Someone might have told poor Steve that Italians lead all others in home ownership and tenderly care for the humblest plot.<br /><br />Yet Vinnie finds a suburban Eden a little too disquietly quiet. He teams up with a few other exiled mobsters in reversion to their sordid games, only to be rescued from local law enforcement by the FBI. To that extent the movie gives an accurate picture if not often with comical overtones, of Witness Protection. Hill in various TV interviews acknowledges having lapsed despite attempts of the FBI to bail him out of new trouble by relocating him.<br /><br />Vinnie faces a formidable adversary in local prosecutor Hannah Stubbs (Joan Cusack) who is constantly frustrated in ridding the town of Vinnie.<br /><br />Poor Execution by Martin of the Brooklyn accent, the uncharitable view of Italians, and giddy silliness about a serious problem: Federally Supported and Funded Crime Waves through Witness Protection won a *** 1 *** rating from me.<br /><br />Vinnie in this movie