Basically "Shoot'Em Up" is an 80's film using today's modern technology. Replace Arnie or Bruce Willis with Clive Owen and baby in tow and you have this film. Owen's carrot fixation is even put to good use pulling triggers and stabbing the villains in the eyeball or through the mouth and out the back of their necks. See how Owen kills special ops assassins while having sex with "hooker with a heart of gold" Monica Belluci(..she even climaxes as he blows one of these heavily equipped villains through a window). There are a great many stunts where Owen is allowed to create on his feet using his artistry with guns. There's a neon sign he uses to tell arch-nemesis Paul Giammati F-U. Just watch how Owen uses his gun to keep his baby protected on a merry-go-round. Or, when he's in a weapons factory, with Owen elaborately creating a method using strings to develop a labyrinthine maze where baddies carrying machine guns fall prey to gun fire when they turn corners(..even if this is the most ludicrous action sequence ever designed, it's a dream come true for action fans). And, the greatest trick of all..pulling off an anti-gun message in such an insanely violent action film! The way the film finds escapes for Owen is a thing of cinematic genius..no matter how many times we roll our eyes at such absolute nonsense.<br /><br />The plot,if it truly matters, is about a man minding his own business who can not sit on his street bench and watch a pregnant woman get assassinated. This decision will cause a ton of complications as he assists the lady into giving birth. His *name* is Smith, and the head-honcho who wants the lady and her child dead is Hertz(Giammatti). When a bullet through the forehead leaves this woman dead, Smith will have to find shelter for the infant while dodging constant gun-fire. Thanks to his uncanny use with an assassin's gun(..there was a reason why he didn't have a gun on his person even though he is a skilled marksman), Smith evades his pursuers sending a great many villains to early graves(..or, as chief businessman Hammerson, played by a scarily skinny Stephen McHattie, would say, a "dirt nap"). Hoping for a hooker's(Bellucci) help, whose specialty is feeding her breast-milk to wealthy clientèle with that kinky fetish, he will hope to provide the infant with a temporary home(..in a brothel!). But, Hertz targets her so this hooker will join up with Smith and the baby on their own forming one very unique union. With Hertz undaunted despite heavy losses when several operations to kill Smith fail miserably, he will keep coming until our hero can discover why these murderers want such a precious child dead. Soon the story yields some wacky results like a bone-marrow transplant for an ill senator who wishes to pursue the presidency(..and has a strict policy against guns which would threaten Hammerson's business)as the child is the key to his health and recovery, and an airplane meeting between Smith and who he thought were his allies(..this soon produces a parachute exit and shoot-out in the sky for the ages). And, to top it all off, watch how Smith, with broken fingers, uses a scalpel to evade certain doom. It's all tongue-in-cheek and unpretentious fare, gory escapist fodder for fanboys who love their constant shoot 'em ups with bullet-ridden bodies & colorful villains and dialogue. Outrageous, tricky ways a gun can kill people are on full display. And, this flick rarely takes a breath. Not a critical darling AT ALL, even hated by many, but I dug the hell out of it. Oh, and the use of a tank(..and how Owen provides a way for Bellucci and babe to enter in)for the use of protection so that the baby can remain safe, is just priceless.