`Neon Maniacs' begins interestingly enough. A narrator grimly informs the audience that, `When the world is ruled by violence, and the soul of mankind fades, the children's path shall be darkened by the shadows of the Neon Maniacs.' Wow. What a really  uh, bold statement. Can anyone tell me what on God's green earth the narrator meant by that? Was he portending some horrible apocalypse? Perhaps he was predicting the Olsen twins' rise to power? I don't know. <br /><br />The film's plot has promise. A band of festively costumed, water-phobic monsters, living under the Golden Gate Bridge are traipsing around San Francisco brutally butchering horny teenagers. Two high school seniors and a grammar school special effects make-up enthusiast join forces to battle the murderous beasties. Unfortunately, writer, Mark Patrick Carducci never really develops his premise; too many questions are left unanswered. For instance, why would a cabal of creatures who are only vulnerable to water choose to reside under the Golden Gate Bridge? And how does a Hangman, a Samurai, a one-eyed meatball, a Bowman, a zombie Native American, a psychotic surgeon, a deformed knife-wielding maniac, a feral man-ape, a fallen soldier and a dead motorcyclist meet, decide to cohabitate, and form a pact to murder innocent San Franciscans? Did one of the creatures place a personal ad in a local newspaper? If so, which one placed the ad? My guess is that it was the one-eyed meatball. <br /><br />Despite the mystifying plotline, the film has its good points. Alan Hayes, Leilani Sarelle and Donna Locke are likeable as our three monster busters. Director, Joseph Mangine manages to craft some memorable scenes of horror (the runaway train sequence and the attack at the dance are stand-outs). And the special effects make-up. Oh, the make-up! The monsters are appropriately grotesque and there's enough death and dismemberment to satisfy the most jaded gore hound of the household. Unless of course that gore hound happens to be into hardcore German zombie movies.<br /><br />