Hello, my name is Brett Kolarik, and I had the distinct displeasure of working on this train-wreck, er, I mean, "film". My apologies for anyone who had to sit through this debacle. Believe me, it was a month in hell for me.<br /><br />Forget the totally asinine script. I couldn't stop slapping my knee while I read it the first time. The second time, I couldn't stop crying. I tried not to read it too much after that. And speaking of the love scenes, did you notice how there was more of THE GUY being filmed, than the girl? That should tell you where Alessandro was coming from...<br /><br />Number One: DeGaetano is a complete moron. COMPLETE. No, let me put that another way - a thieving conceited mean-spirited moron! A liar, also. OK, can you tell I don't like him? But he is a THIEF, that's for sure! Let me say this real quick: NOBODY on the crew liked the jerk. He was consistently rude, obnoxious, and over-bearing (did I mention extremely conceited?), and when you combine that with a VERY VERY low I.Q., this is what you get. The original working title was "Small Towns are Murder" (before the Gene Wilder film was made, I think), BTW.<br /><br />For instance, Matt Gilmore and I (my co-worker in this mess) were promised, at first, in pre-production meetings (the early ones), that our FX budget would be quite decent. It dwindled from say a few thousand dollars down to about $200, by the time we actually started shooting - I'm not kidding. We had grand plans - prosthetics, animatronics, really elaborate FX planned out. We figured, "OK, the script sucks, maybe we can do something, at least visually". HA HA HA! I guess it was all of those elaborate lunches Alessandro ate with his little pals at the local Spanish restaurant (which is a horrible rip-off, and serves horrible food like fried squid and crap) that kinda' ate into our FX budget, no pun intended. So we were left with basically no cash to work with.<br /><br />I could go on and on, but I will finish here, because I'm getting tired already. I must admit, I had fun doing it, and it was a great learning experience for me. But in the end, it turned very sour. How, you ask? Well, DeGaetano ended up splitting town, and failed to pay everyone thousands of dollars in back-pay, owed to many of the crew. I don't know about the cast. (The tramp he imported from L.A., by the way, was a complete snob - and I had to put up w/ her B.S. for an entire month, which sucked. The two stiffs were boring as hell, and thought they were God's gift, or something). BUT HE RIPPED OFF THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS. A few of us planned on a lawsuit, but it never materialized.<br /><br />So, again, my apologies to anyone who had to sit through this revolting quagmire. God Bless and have a nice day! Sincerely, B. Kolarik