If you were alive in the year 2000, you probably remember the anguished screams of moviegoers all over the world upon the release of this cinematic abomination.<br /><br />You've probably heard people say things like "It's the worst film ever. No, forget 'The Phantom Menace' - this one's even worse!" and "It tastes like burning!" and stuff, which may lead you to wonder: Is 'Battlefield Earth' really as bad as all that? Is it really such an abhorrent pile of horse crap? The answer to that is yes. Yes it is.<br /><br />"But" I hear you say "The special effects are OK. It has action and stuff, and I know John Travolta is way up himself, but he can act, can't he?" Now, I ought to make it clear that what you see on the screen at any given time is never that bad. The acting is passable, as are the special effects, as are the sets.<br /><br />The atrocities committed in 'Battlefield Earth' come from behind the camera.<br /><br />The directing is nothing short of abysmal. So much so that I honestly don't know where to start. Combining yawn-o-matic cliché with pioneering new innovations in crapness, you will be lucky not to pinch a nerve in your neck as you constantly adjust to the fact that almost every shot is taken at a tilt. Slow-motion is overemployed in the action scenes to ensure that you definitely know that you are seeing something very dramatic. Wipe transitions take far longer than God, or indeed Satan ever intended.<br /><br />On to the story. Nothing makes sense. There are plot holes here that you could drive a lorry through. However, I won't go in to details because these are best discovered as you watch.<br /><br />Indeed, the story was so bad that I actually found myself pitying the cast. There was Barry Pepper (Jonnie) acting his socks off, taking it all terribly seriously, seemingly oblivious to the fact that the script was irredeemable. Seriously, the dialogue was so hilariously unnatural that I must toff my hat to him and the rest of the cast for not collapsing in to fits of uncontrollable laughter.<br /><br />But what of John Travolta? Well, he camps things up as the delightfully evil Terl, and he didn't deliver a single line without leaving teeth marks all over the scenery. Wonderful.<br /><br />All in all, 'Battlefield Earth' is so bad that it's good. The whole thing is so utterly abysmal that you'll be spellbound, waiting to see if it can possibly get any more ridiculous. And trust me, 'Battlefield Earth' doesn't disappoint.<br /><br />So go see it. It really is something so awful as to inspire a perverted sort of admiration. You'll love it. Or maybe you'll lose the will to live another day.<br /><br />Either way, it's an unforgettable experience.