This is the one with Hector Elizondo as the murderous First Secretary at the Suarian Legation. He enlists an unwitting Sal Mineo as an accomplice, robs the legation of $600,000 after murdering a security guard, then tries to pin the crime on Mineo by bumping him off. He doesn't get away with it.<br /><br />I'm not sure why this doesn't seem as entertaining as some of the other early episodes. I had trouble right off the bat. What's the difference between a Legation, a Consulate, and an Embassy? And then, as the mystery unfolds, or rather the solution to the mystery unfolds, I found Hector Elizondo not the most engaging of Columbo's adversaries. Oh, he haughty and condescending, like all the others, but his expression never changes. There is no bewitching byplay between him and Peter Falk as Columbo. Then, too, the best of the villains are people we naturally hate anyway -- wine snobs, chess freaks, egg heads, fine art dilettantes, corrupt politicians, superior health nuts, and the like. But there's no particular reason to resent a Suarian First Secretary, so there's no intrinsic hatred for the story to cash in on.<br /><br />There's not much in the way of comedy in this episode either, and what there is of it is unsubtle. Columbo leans against a pedestal with a three-thousand-year-old vase atop and juggles it for a moment while Elizondo looks on blankly.<br /><br />There is, though, an unusual twist at the end. Elizondo brags about the crime to Columbo. He can afford to do it because the case is weak and Elizondo has diplomatic immunity, I guess. But Columbo has sneaked the King of Suari into a neighboring room to eavesdrop, and the King tells Elizondo he will now be sent back to Suari to face Suari justice. Elizondo hastily signs a confession and is led away by the LAPD.<br /><br />I mused for a few moments on how the writers came up with the fictional monarchy of "Suari" or "Suaria." I can imagine someone having thought of "Syria" right off the bat but thinking they obviously couldn't use it. So -- says another writer -- let's just switch that initial vowel and make is "Sauria". A third guy points out that this leads to "Saurian", an English word meaning "lizard-like." So one of the writers suggests transposing the two vowels, resulting in "Suaria," a national name to which no one can object.<br /><br />One scene involves an encounter between Columbo and some sign-wielding protesters outside the Suari Legation. By an odd coincidence I played a sign-wielding Albanian protester in a scene with Peter Falk in the vastly superior "Tune In Tomorrow." The film sank without a trace, but I understand it has since become an underground art-house classic and that my performance has been lauded by everyone who's seen it. I know this to be true because both my mother and my psychiatrist have assured me it is.<br /><br />Falk's performance is fine, as usual. By this time he could have walked through the role in his sleep. But the script doesn't give him much, the set-up itself isn't very imaginative, and Elizondo is no help.