Abstract
This paper describes six men who decided to be a stay-at-home-fathers lived in Salatiga. All respondents believe that parenting roles is a kind of common responsibility for both parent. However, there are also challenges faced by stay-at-home-fathers which divided into the practical challenges related to the double role as father and mother, and also the emotional challenges. Nevertheless, no respondents stated that the roles of stay-at-home-father affects to the concept of masculinity itself but rather a responsibility of a father to protect the family. The division of house works based on gender roles have a close relation to the traditional Javanese concept of a family, which explained that men play an important role as the leader in running all domestic matters as well as being the breadwinner, while women should be responsible to take care of the children and doing house chores. Meanwhile, the idea of equality promoted by feminist thinkers deconstructed the meaning of family that has been understood since a long time ago. The research of this paper uses qualitative phenomenological method, with data collection technique by snowball sampling. In-depth interview conducted for three weeks long to five single fathers and a stay-at-home father living in Salatiga.
INTRODUCTION
The view on current gender issues continues to develop among the society nowadays. The development of family pattern characteristics is constantly evolving as a change in the mindset of people who are more openly related to gender issues and promote the concept of gender equality promoted by feminist thinkers.
INTRODUCTION
Ideas about equality which promoted by the feminists are created in order to eliminate the structural discrimination posed by social construction of male and female identity according to biosocial theory (Wood & Eagly, 2002) . It creates new perspective and phenomena for some men to finally take over the household tasks and play the role as a full-time father, especially for those who face an unpredicted condition that force them to be a single father.
INTRODUCTION
It is different from the traditional family concept within Javanese society where men play an important role as the breadwinner while women are associated with the duties as taking care of the children and maintain the good condition of household. These divisions are then also associated with patriarchal culture adopted by the Javanese community since the past becomes is an example of how gender can determine the division of household duties between men and women that have existed for a long time.
INTRODUCTION
If we look at the phenomenon through the gender studies perspective, the decision brings about a positive change that signifies the realization that the social constructs which constitute individual identities as male and female are not the means of dominating each other but are just complementary. The phenomenon also provides an opportunity to open up insights for women to seize the opportunity to achieve the ideals in their careers and education, while men also have the opportunity to demonstrate the instinct of protecting and caring with participation in domestic lopezmichelle@example.com. This paper will examine the roles of stay-at-home-fathers and single fathers in Salatiga as it breaks the concept of traditional family structure within Javanese society where men play an important role as the breadwinner while women are associated with the duties as taking care of the children and maintain the good condition of household and prove the ideas of equality promoted by feminist thinkers. from the traditional family concept. However, before examining the roles of full-time fathers, the authors will jump deeper into the concepts of Javanese traditional family, gender roles itself, and also masculinity to describe the roles and challenges of full-time fathers. As the ending, this paper will provide analysis regarding the research findings which explain the role of full-time fathers in Salatiga.
THE ROLE OF HUSBAND AND WIFE IN FAMILY CONCEPT BASED ON JAVANESE CULTURE
The domestic labor division in Javanese concept of family is still based on the binary opposition of traditional gender roles. Both genders are required to have certain characteristics to gain approval from the society. Men should be masculine, strong, independent, have a decent work, become the head of household and the breadwinner, while women have to be feminine, maternal, week, need to be protected, responsible for domestic work and dependent to their husband. Raharjo (1995) quoted in Putri and Lestari (2015) emphasized two values in Javanese culture that became the reference in the division of roles of women and men in the family, namely: suwarga nunut, neraka katut and kanca wingking. Suwarga nunut and neraka katut is a culture that believes that the determination of life after the death of a wife is determined by the husband. When the husband enters heaven, the same thing happens to the wife (nunut). The wife cannot enter heaven, if the husband goes to hell despite his good deeds (katut). Meanwhile, kanca wingking is another culture of masak, macak, manak (cooking, dressing up, childbirth). Over time, the role of husband and wife shifted in the concept of a modern Javanese family. The division of tasks is flexible, mutual respect, no one dominates. Decision-making is not only in the hands of the husband, but both husband and wife (Hardjodisastro & Hardjodisastro, 2010 in Putri & Lestari, 2015 .
METHODOLOGY
This research uses qualitative phenomenological method, with data collection technique by snowball sampling, that is one kind of purposive sampling method to select the specific study units that will yield the most relevant and plentiful data to the study (Yin, 2011: 88-89) . Authors found 6 (six) people who are domiciled in Salatiga. Among them, 5 (five) single fathers and 1 (one) stay-at-home-father. Authors first spoke to a relative/friend who know any fathers who stays at home with his children. After founding the person, the authors started to interact with them through text message by introducing myself, the purpose of the research and question details, also asking for the availability time to do the interview. The interview process is conducted within 3 (three) weeks with time corresponding to the demand of informants. The interview runs approximately 30 minutes to 60 minutes.
METHODOLOGY
The interview method used is in-depth interview, based on structured guideline interviews to assist authors in the process of collecting and analyzing data. The questions in the study follow the format of Deutsch and Coltrane (1996 and 1999) cited in Colbert (2010) about shared parenting families to assist in determining the framing of research. The criteria of the informants in this study include not only stay-at-home-fathers, but also single fathers who still have children as dependents, with the consideration that both have the same possibility related to the roles and challenges of domestic responsibilities. The other criteria are domiciled in Salatiga area.
RESEARCH FINDINGS
The 
THE ROLES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
The result of this research also shows that the roles of stay-at-home fathers in Salatiga, can be explained as follows: first, there is only small numbers of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga. The majority is more likely single fathers, which play double roles as breadwinner and caregiver in a family (being feminine and masculine at once). Regarding to the double roles they teke, being single father can be categorized as stay-at-home-father because they hold both binary opposition mentioned in as traditional values of family. Second, happened as the cause of the first role, there is a change of the concept of traditional family likewise in Javanese culture herein Salatiga. In short, small numbers of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga is very progressive as proven with their modern values of family they believe.
THE ROLES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
In this section, the roles of stay-at-home-fathers will be explained into two parts, namely: the practical task and the emotional support for children, based on the formal and informal division of work in the household. Therefore, the following will be explained in detail information from each informant related to their role in the household as stay-at-home-fathers as described below:


Practical Tasks
Practical tasks are everything related to the housework. Generally, stay-at-home-fathers ask for help from a household assistant or a nearby family. The roles of stay-at-home-fathers will be appeared from how the stay-at-home-fathers overcome the difficulties both in parenting and housekeeping. Based on the information obtained from the six informants, if the stay-at-homefathers do not ask a household assistant, they will seek help from their mothers. Especially, to help them raising their daughter. The following is the background of the six informants to give B is the only informant who is really a stay-at-home-father. As stated above, B does both houseworks and taking care of the children. He explained in an interview with the authors that the reason to work as a stay-at-home-father because he was fired from his job. As seen above, the division of household affairs given between the B and his partner is flexible. They can take turn on taking care of the house and the children, if one of them has a job that requires them to leave the house. In addition to what has been said, B also explained that he is responsible for managing the finances and the spending of daily needs. He argues that, just like any profession, stay-at-home-father is a profession that needs lifelong learning. He feels he will not return to be an office worker, although there is a chance.
Practical Tasks
"At first it was hard, there was a wife and we were together, there was a friend to talk to, now I have to decide all by myself. However, I enjoy it as the time passes. I do it all by myself, from taking care of the house to washing the clothes, including cooking too. Sometimes I ask the helper, but some other times I do it alone. Me and my children try to do the tasks together." (M, Single Father, 48 years old)
Practical Tasks
Another statement came out from M as a single father with three children. The quote above shows that M does all the domestic affairs. M believes that the ability to perform all domestic works is not limited to one's gender. Regardless of the fact M took untraditional role as stay-at-home-father, he still believes that 'the concept of ideal family' needs the figure of a wife and a mother.
Practical Tasks
"After my wife passed away, I resigned from the office and built my own business since the office hours were almost 24 hours. The situation will be difficult for the children if I keep working. After my wife passed away, I decided to move to Salatiga. The children's grandmother lives here, so there is someone who can help me to take care of them. At that time, in the beginning, I found it difficult to build a close relationship with the children because they are closer to their mother. In addition, there were maids and relatives who helped raising the children, and finally I decided not to use the maid service anymore. I tried to do all alone." (S, 49 years old) In the process of being a stay-at-home-father, S admitted he also had difficulty in the beginning, especially in building relationships with the children. However, S can adapt and feel comfortable in the end, as happened to B. In S' case, he decided to stop using housemaid's assistance after three years being a stay-at-home father. He did that to build the bonding with his children after his wife passed away. Considering the circumstances for himself and the children, he enjoys his condition to work from home and spend the time with his children. His families support him in running their role as a stay-at-home-father. S is taking care of the housework financial affairs, cleaning the house and parenting and not to hire a housemaid. Decision taken with consideration to teach his son to be more responsible, by assigning the housework to his first-born child.
Practical Tasks
Below is a quote from Y, a single father with two children. Same with S, he also gets help from his family in parenting. If S asks his mother to take care of his youngest child, Y asks for help to take care of his first-born child. The younger child lives with him. His first-born child lives with his mother because Y feels that his mother will understand his daughter better. He holds double role in performing his role as a stay-at-home-father.
Practical Tasks
"My wife was sick for a long time. Before my wife passed away, I had resigned from my job and started my work as it is today. In the morning, I prepare breakfast for the younger child, because the older child lives with the grandmother. I cook myself and then take a shower and prepare the child's needs. After that, I take the child to school and then I start to open the shop and prepare for other things that my child asks for. In the daytime, I pick up the child from school and then open the shop again. If there is a photo call for the wedding or other events, my children stay at their Grandfather and Grandmother's house." (Y, Single Father, 46 years old) Likewise M, S and Y still holds traditional belief regarding the importance of the presence of a woman to raise his children. It arose the question whether the decision is related to the inability to connect with the children emotionally, as it is seen as feminine' role in the society. So, the author asks if the presence of a woman has a thing to do with 'feminine' role in a family, but M and S do not agreed with that statement.
Practical Tasks
Next informant, W, 56 years old, as a single father also has different characters that influence his role as stay-at-home-father. W is a retired who is no longer working. He lives with his one child. In doing housework, W is assisted by a helper. When his helper takes leave in Eid Al-Fitr, he takes care of everything alone. Nevertheless, when his wife was still alive, his wife's main job was cooking, other work was done together. The reason why W does not do housework, is because he is not used to it. For him, the important thing that the task be completed, regardless of who does it. He said it has nothing to do with one's gender also. V is a special case. In V's case, the role of stay-at-home-father does not appear in practical task because V does not live with his children. However, in a certain time he can do the household chores and cook. He lives alone and his child lives outside Java with his V's mother. However, the similarities can be seen from the need for a family role in parenting as the main characteristic of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga, as mentioned earlier. As mentioned in the quotation below, emotional closeness with his children still exists, although his children do not live with him. Overall, for practical tasks, stay-at-home-fathers do not only do masculine work such as driving and picking up children, but also taking care of financial problems at home, and some informants are also cooking and taking care of their children which considered as feminine tasks by society. As showed above, flexibility and time play a major role in determining a father's roles in doing practical tasks.
Practical Tasks
Most of the stay-at-home-fathers need their moms to help to raise their children for the wellbeing of the children, nonetheless they are succeed of portraying closeness with their children as they give time to be with their children more often. It proves that the stay-at-homefathers are able to show emotion, even though it is regarded as feminine roles, of which will be explained more clearly in the section below.
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Emotional support for children
Parental duties are not only related to practical tasks, but also emotional support for the children. This section will prove that man is also capable of building emotional relation with their children. The assumption that women, or in this case are mothers, who are emotionally closer to parenting, are attached to the understanding of stay-at-home-fathers, but some informants do not make that understanding a constraint to build their emotional connection with the children.
Emotional support for children
It is proved by the uniformity of decisions taken by stay-at-home-fathers to involve the children's Grandmother in parenting (especially for daughters). The decision was allegedly arisen due to the lack of confidence of the stay-at-home-fathers in emotional relationships with the children. Nevertheless, the author suggests that deconstruction of the 'masculinity' is seen from the 'efforts' given by stay-at-home-fathers in building emotional connection with the children. www.irhs.ui.ac.id, e-ISSN: 2477-6866, p-ISSN: 2527- The 'efforts' show that the stay-at-home-fathers are detached from the traditional gender roles. They believe that men and women are both capable in emotional support for their children. The stay-at-home-fathers take the decision to give the best for their children, seeing their inability, not based on gender-based stigma. It is not the matter of gender, but who gives effort to build the bonding with the children.
International Review of Humanities Studies
"We are very close, my child and I always tell a lot of things about my child's experience at school with the teachers and friends. My child is an introvert therefore sometimes my child needs support to be able to socialize with lopezmichelle@example.com. We often spend our free time chatting and watching television lopezmichelle@example.com. We rarely spend free time outdoors. I prefer sharing and inviting her to engage in discussions with me. For things related to 'women' issues, I usually ask my mother-in-law or the teacher at school to give explanation and understanding to my child so that she understands about the problems she's facing. Related to the problem with her friends, I directed her to be more selfintrospective rather than blame her friends " (W, Single Father, 56 years old) "Quality time for the three of us is when we visited the grandmother's house. With the youngest one, we usually spend the time playing games, and chatting, since we live together in a home, we spent a whole day together. I am closer to the youngest one. The closeness level can reach 90%, but with the eldest is only 40-50%. My first-born child used to be very close with the mother, right now she is still not very close with me. The eldest one rarely chatting with me since my wife passed away, only happened a few times. It's very hard to be close with my daughter since her relationship with my wife was very close, even though with the grandparents, it is also very difficult. I ask help to the teachers, but it is also still difficult. Still, I am trying." (Y, Single Father, 46 years old) "The closest relationship is with the eldest one. It is because my eldest child thinks about the siblings, so we can discuss together. With my second and third children are close like father-and-children. Usually the oldest one likes to ask my opinion. We talk to solve problems together, such as about the education matter or the social interaction. It is often for the second one, sometimes because the second one is still immature, the eldest one is the one who helps guiding. The second one usually talks to the eldest one, and the eldest one will tell me. (M, Single Father, 48 years old) The author's opinion is supported by the argument from the way these six informants show affection for their children. Based on the interviews, all informants agree that the 'efforts' to provide emotional support does not affect their masculinity as a man. They put the needs of the children first, as discussed above. In the other hand, the authors argue that 'the efforts' given, strengthens their roles as stay-at-home-fathers. The six stay-at-home-fathers are not ashamed to show their affection through verbal or gesture, through hugs and kisses. In the case of these six www.irhs.ui.ac.id, e-ISSN: 2477-6866, p-ISSN: 2527- informants, the growing children are the ones who feel embarrassed when it comes to the affection of the fathers. When they are not together, stay-at-home-fathers watches their children by routinely sending messages or calling to ensure their children's circumstances. In addition, the approach made by V was interesting as his efforts to build an emotional relationship with his child. He asked his child not to call him 'Papa' (Daddy), but his name instead. It can also be categorized as the role deconstruction of 'father' in the traditional family, which is the solution for V as a stay-at-home father in performing his role.
International Review of Humanities Studies
"Yes, although sometimes they do not want to, but sometimes I force myself to show affection through body gestures. For example, when we are away on vacation together, we will sleep in one room. It is where I'll start showing my affection by hugging when sleeping. However sometimes they are difficult to be asked to walk together. They tell me to be apart from them. Shy, they said (S, Single Father, 49 years old) "Sometimes hugging, sometimes kissing, but as they are getting older, they feel embarrassed. So usually we are hugging or kissing together with the younger one to not feel embarrassed. If we are far, we communicate through phone or WhatsApp." (B, Single Father, 46 years old)
International Review of Humanities Studies
"Because of the far distance, we often make a video call. Almost every time, usually after the child comes home from school, but if for example it is too late in the night, she will protest 'Kenapa se telepon malam-malam, beta so mangan to le...' So, I make my child like a friend. No need to call Papa (Daddy), just call me my name, so she will be more relaxed if she needs a friend to talk to and she can tell me all things. The grandparents will be angry if she just calls me by my name but I tell my mother and father that my child is a girl, I have to give different treatment to build emotional closeness." (V, Single Father, 33 years old)
International Review of Humanities Studies
The conclusion of the stay-at-home-fathers roles, there is a tendency for stay-at-homefathers to focus on the emotional connection with the children. Practical tasks happen to be the second priority, and the help of the helper is influenced by the economic consideration and the number of children. Families with sufficient economic levels are said to be hiring maids it is needed. But if they prefer to take care their children by themselves, in order to build the emotion with the children. The helper only required to do practical tasks. The role of stay-at-home-fathers differs contextually of each stay-at-home-fathers. Therewith, the 'efforts' given to strengthen the emotional connection build through gesture and verbal. It shows that emotional connection is not only the capability done by women, but also by men, and by doing that, not making the stay-athome-fathers feel less masculine despite of the Javanese culture that society believes.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
The challenges faced by stay-at-home-fathers are divided into two, namely: practical challenges and emotional challenges. Practical challenges arise simply because stay-at-homefathers are not accustomed to play double roles, since most of them are accustomed to doing housework but never do both simultaneously. The practical challenge has been discussed mostly in the role of stay-at-home-fathers, therefore in this section the authors will focus on the emotional challenges faced by stay-at-home-fathers. The author focuses on the stay-at-homefathers' self-perception about his masculinity, as well as his self-perception from the eyes of others (his surroundings). The first emotional challenge faced is self-perception in achieving the ideal figure of 'Father' in the family, whether there is any particular values attached to the informant, thus making them question their masculinity as stay-at-home-fathers? Six informants responded, it is closely related to the concept of modern family that is more flexible when it comes to do household and parental duties. A family should be able to exchange roles according to the needs of each household.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
The major of stay-at-home-fathers believe that there is no standard family role in the context of a modern family. It shows the deconstruction of the Javanese family concept in which there is a division of roles between women and men. However, it does not work in the case of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga. Stay-at-home-fathers expressed task division based on gender is clearly impractical. If something needs to be done for their children, regardless the divided gender roles, they assured that it is done.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
In addition, these six informants are faced with situations where they are 'forced' to play a double role in the family. Both of these things create positive self-perceptions for stay-at-homefathers in the society, with the support of the society, all stay-at-home-fathers do not question about their masculinity. Notwithstanding, stay-at-home-fathers need their mother in doing parental duties, it happens because they are overwhelmed doing household and parental duties at the same time. Again, it has nothing to do with the gender roles.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
The same thing happened to the only stay-at-home-father, B is satisfied and proud of his choice to be a stay-at-home-father. Although his parents have a conventional view of his role, he realizes that the concept of family is no longer static. Each household and the responsibilities of each person within the family are dynamic. Challenges such as not having time for themselves do not appear in the six informants. B mentioned about it a bit, but he actually found his role as a stay-at-home-father gives him a lot of free time, happiness, contentment and freedom rather than having to be office workers.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
"My role as a stay-at-home-father is not sudden. We also learn. I join the program with the priests to have a dialogue with the couple about how to make decisions. It is also what helped me about my decision to be a stay -at-home-father." (B, Stay-At-Home-Father, 46 years old) "So far, I have not heard any negative things. In the other hand, I heard some positive things" 'Wow, living alone, taking care of three children and still being able to smile and never be troubled.' Those are the things I hear. Perceptions of ideal figures are expected to be contrasted to show how each informant reflects himself with the role he is currently performing. Based on the results of the six informants, the authors conclude that emotional challenges almost do not exist because people's views of stay-at-home-fathers have shifted from traditional binary opposition to the deconstruction of gender roles in the family concept. The concept or ideal figure of a 'Father' is not based on the binary opposition, as mentioned: strength, breadwinner, independent, active, etc. Rather, it depends on his traits and behaviors of which more gender biased, namely: wise, cooperative, empathetic, and sedulous.
THE CHALLENGES OF STAY-AT-HOME-FATHERS IN SALATIGA
"The ideal family should all be able to help each other." (B, Stay-At-Home-Father, 46 years old) "The ideal figure of a father should be a wise man, but sometimes humans only complain about the 'result', that happens to me, I feel that way as a stay-at-home-father. Sometimes I can only complain, but as a good and wise husband, I realize that I must fight for my children, facing any situation." (M, Single Father, 46 years old) "The ideal figure has changed a lot after my wife passed away. I was crippled and unable to achieve the vision and mission that I wanted. There is no wife figure that completes the family, because I have to play a double role." (Y, Single Father, 46 years old) Nevertheless, one of the informants, Y, assumes that a figure of 'a wife' and 'a mother' is required in the concept of an ideal family. There seem to be some contradictions in the words of these stay-at-home-fathers, as the role of mother mentioned oftentimes. Once again, the 'wholeness' referred by Y is related to two people as parents. It is regarding the multiple roles it carries, not related to the view of gender roles in the family. It is proven by the family concept they believe that is based on traits of which gender biased as mentioned above.
CONCLUSION
The interesting thing from the data that has been found is that the role of stay-at-homefathers in Salatiga differs from the original assumption of the author. At the beginning the author assumed that Salatiga, which is a small town in Central Java, still has thick traditional family concept based on binary opposition regarding of its culture. The research findings showed different results. From the six informants that have been interviewed, those six informants agreed that the role as a father or mother in a family does not depend on the gender. The meaning of the father and mother's roles can be seen not only from the sex only, but the social context that is dynamic. A father can do the things a mother does, and vice versa. There is no rigid division of housework based on gender, it is more to the reason of flexibility of the stay-at-home-fathers. For emotional support in children, two out of six informants found it is difficult to get connected with their children. This situation creates an interesting variation that can be a picture of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga. Despite its difficulties, the two informants still give their best efforts in building emotional connection, likewise other four informants, through gesture and verbal. It proves stay-at-home-fathers do not constraint their emotions, as they assume that expressing emotions is not connected with their masculinity.
CONCLUSION
As final words, the authors conclude that stay-at-home-fathers are not facing serious challenges. Many expressed that the challenges can be faced with help of the family. As discussed earlier, it happens more to be practical challenges rather than the emotional challenges of stay-at-home-fathers in Salatiga, Central Java, Indonesia.

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