Throughout Southern Europe, many people conduct ordinary conversations in a more lively manner than that which other people, especially Northern Europeans, are accustomed. Loud volume, gesticulation for emphasis, interruptions and casual body contact that might seem rude or boisterous elsewhere is ordinary. As Austria is a traditionally Roman Catholic nation, greetings such as "Grüß Gott" are very common, but would be inappropriate in Protestant Germany (i.e. outside Bavaria). It is considered unkind or even rude to refer an Austrian national as being a German. Although they speak the same language, Austrians are quite proud of their separate national identity. Belgium contains several separate ethno-linguistic communities, including the Dutch-speaking community of Flanders, the French-speaking community of Wallonia and a relatively small German-speaking community in the east of Belgium. At times terms such as Walloons or Flemish indicate cultural identity, while other times they indicate only geographical location. Belgians themselves are still wrestling with these terms and a little understanding of that fact goes a long way. The Flemish political party Vlaams Belang is excluded from any coalition government by the so-called cordon sanitaire and this is a bad issue to raise in conversation. Many Belgians are secretive about their political views, as reflected in a discrepancy between exit polls and actual election results. Kissing is usually done when greeting friends and family. The number of kisses differ from province to province. For instance, in the province of West-Flanders it's common to kiss once. On special occasions or to congratulate someone, they kiss three times. Kissing is only done between two women or a man and a woman, not between men, in Flanders, who usually shake hands, whereas kisses between men is more or less common in the francophone communities. Although, good friends and relatives do kiss often as well. Offensive gestures like waving your fist to someone or flipping someone off is not done, but note that some people do use their middle finger to point at things. This is only common among people older than 40. When one from the South travels to the North (and vice versa), politely ask the person in their regional language "Pardon/Excuse Me, Sir/Madam, are/can/may you (able to) speak Dutch/French?" You wait for an answer and use the language most convenient for the conversation. The Flemish population is mainly bilingual (Dutch/French), the Walloon population less so. Many Flemings are also very good English speakers. In secondary school they learn other languages like Latin, Greek and German. 60% of the inhabitants of Belgium have Dutch as their language, 40% French. Only a small percentile has German as their first language. Brussels is 80% French-speaking, although north of the language boundary. Refer to the majority language of Belgium as Dutch, not as Flemish because this is a an accent, not a language. The Flemish speak Dutch with a Flemish accent. The use of some French words in Flemish is also common. In the 19th and 20th centuries, there were small communities entirely of nuns in Belgium, since it is a nominally Catholic country. Taking shoes off when inside someone's home is considered a norm. Having shoes on signifies lack of hygienic manners and disrespect. Please avoid the issue of the Bosnian Civil War, the dissolution of Yugoslavia and ethnic/national/religious differences at all costs. Never bring up Yugoslavia, Communism, the Tito era, the Ustashe regime (Croatian Nationalism) and Slobodan Milosevic (Serbian Nationalism). Bosnian and Herzegovinians have been in Yugoslavia only a couple of decades and as such in general they do not like to be called Yugoslavs. Like the rest of western Balkans, the local Partizan army resistance brought end to World War II in the territories. If you are coming from one of Allied countries or Russia, try not to bring the subject of "we liberated you". Also do not carelessly display two or three fingers out in public or in front of a crowd. They are incendiary and insulting to a certain group of people, also they symbolize religious views of the trinity, in part of historic animosities between the three groups of people living in the country: Bosnian Serbs (mostly Orthodox Christians), Bosnian Croats (mostly Roman Catholics) and Bosniaks (mostly Muslim). Do not bring up religious subjects that might hurt one of religious groups in the country. Bosnians, although very secular, are quite educated when it comes to all major religions and holding a religious discussion without having much insight in the matter might turn out tougher than expected. No matter how large the city you come from, do not forget that they had electric trams and trolleys well before the rest of Europe and major part of the world. They offer unmatched hospitality, but expect you to be civil and respectful. Be social and open, Bosnians are almost by rule very social society and love chitchats and meeting up for a cup of coffee. As the rest population on Balkan peninsula, they are considered a complete opposite of Scandinavians when it comes to socializing. Don't drink without limits, although fermenting local kind of fruit brandy called Rakija (around 50-75% alcohol) is considered a national sport, drinking and "fooling around" in public is considered rude and disrespectful. Drink freely, but keep you dignity. If someone offers to buy you a round of drinks or paying for lunch, don't decline but take it and be thankful. You are generally not expected to return the round back, it is a way for them to show you that they like you as a person or that they respect you. You will never see locals asking for separate bills in restaurants or bars, they take care of entire bill without caring who paid less or drank more. Bulgaria, Belarus, Ukraine and Russia share naming conventions. Many surnames change based on gender. For example Mr. Ivanov's wife might be Mrs. Ivanova. Accidentally referring to him as Mr. Ivanova or her as Mrs. Ivanov is a serious faux pas. Since understanding these suffixes and how they are applied in a specific region is a relatively simple matter to learn, even monoglot speakers of English are expected to use them correctly. Similar rules apply in other Slavic languages, such as Polish or Czech. Rather than greeting guests and conducting transactions (such as paying a delivery man) over the threshold, it is more polite to allow people to step inside or to step outside to meet them. In some homes throughout Croatia, shoes are taken off before entering. When a host insists the guest keep them on it may be a sign of respect. Do not, under any circumstances, bring up the topics of Yugoslavia, Tito, and Communism. Do not, under any circumstances, bring up the topic of the War in the 1990s, unless the host initiates. Some hosts might be wounded veterans that don't want to talk about it and can be viewed as offensive. Yugoslavia ceased to exist, and Croatia has been independent from Yugoslavia since 1991. Do not refer to Croats or Croatia as Yugoslavs or Yugoslavia, as majority of the population will find that disrespectful. Never attempt to split a bar tab or a restaurant check. It is customary for each person in the group to buy a round of drinks at a bar. When it is someone's birthday, usually the person who is being celebrated treats friends and family to lunch and/or drinks. It is his/her day and he/she wants friends and family to have fun on his/her day. The a "V sign" and "thumbs up" mean “victory” and “okay” respectively. Making an "O" with index and thumb with other fingers extended has positive meaning, and is usually connected with something deemed "first class", such as well prepared food. Elsewhere in Europe these gestures can have impolite meanings. Do not be surprised to hear people cursing in every sentence spoken. It is normal for people to do that, at any age. If unfamiliar with a person, avoid using curses. Kissing cheeks after or while handshaking can be impolite[citation needed]. When appropriate, people kiss once on each cheek. In Međimurje, it is a tradition to kiss four times, twice for each cheek. Also, kissing cheeks as a greeting is only acceptable between family members and close friends. It is not appropriate in business or formal situations. It is preferable to refer to Croatia as a Southern European or a Central European country rather than a Balkan country. When offering cigars, sweets, or similar items from an assortment, it is impolite to select one for the receiver. The whole assortment should be offered to the receiver so he/she can choose. It is rude to take more than one when selecting. Introduce others before introducing one's self. Also, when referring to others in some context involving yourself, put yourself last. Ex. "Ann and I went to see a movie" NOT "Me and Ann went to see a movie." (This is good practice anywhere in Europe.) Talking or asking about one's personal wealth, possessions or success in business is widely viewed as impolite, unless you are very extremely familiar with that person. As Czechoslovakia ceased to exist in 1993, it is inconsiderate to use this name to refer to the Czech Republic. Also avoid referring to the area as Eastern Europe, preferring Central Europe if possible and in context. When you are visiting a house or flat, it is polite to remove your shoes. It is very impolite to wear your shoes inside the house. It is impolite to talk about salaries during a conversation, even with your close friends. If you are a man traveling with a woman, you must enter a pub or restaurant first and leave last, as well as always walking under her on stairs (woman first when going up the stairs, man first when going down). When passing people in a theater or cinema row, face them. It is considered rude to pass with your back toward the other person. Handshake must be strong and without other gestures or movements. In Estonia, tradition dictates that bread is ripped with the fingers rather than cut with a knife. Avoid referring to the area as Eastern Europe, preferring Northern Europe, if possible in context. Estonians prefer to be identified as a "Western" or "Northern European country" with cultural affinities with Finland, as well Latvia and Lithuania, but Estonians speak a Finnic not Indo-European language and are Lutherans alike Latvians but not Lithuanians. Please be sensitive and respectful to issues and subjects regarding the Baltic States' (such as Estonia) past experience under the Soviet Union (1940-1941 and 1944-91) and the Nazi occupation during WWII (1941-44). Do not start a conversation with an ethnic Estonian in Russian language as it is seen as a huge faux pas by any foreigner. Once first contact is made in any other language, it is OK to ask whether the Estonian is fine with conversing in Russian if he or she possesses the language. French manners were established by the ecclesiastical authorities in the Middle Ages, by the monarchy from the 15th to the 17th centuries, then by the aristocracies, bourgeoisie and political classes in the modern era. These codes helped these classes successfully exert power. Many French people expect foreigners to address (or try to address) them in French. It's considered impolite to open a conversation with a (French) stranger in another language. Instead, etiquette demands that something resembling Excusez-moi. Parlez-vous [language] ? be voiced. This is also because many French cannot speak any decent English and ranking of France is terribly bad over the years (23rd in Europe). Freedom of speech is extremely important but its moderation is even more: article 17 of the European Convention on Human Rights which forbids discriminatory speech (racist, antisemitic, homophobic, etc). For both sexes, shaking hands with a woman in a casual context is distancing. Embracing (holding each other loosely in the arms while lightly kissing each other's cheek) is usually expected and even more for young people. The number of cheek-kisses varies from region to region between 2, 3 or 4. A man usually do not kiss another man except a close friend or family member. Generally speaking men kiss more easily in southern France. The American "okay gesture" means "zero" or "worthless" in France except for those who practice scuba diving. The "okay gesture" in France is the thumb up. France is really late on the true equality between men and women. Despite the laws, in 2006 France ranked 84th in the world based on elected women in the french lower house and 21st/25 in the European Union. On July 19, 2012, many men in the National Assembly whistled and made macho comments (even the President of the National Assembly) to Minister Cécile Duflot just because she was wearing a flowery dress. Though many people told their indignation against such macho behavior, it is undeniable that a lot is still to be done for women's rights. For talking about money see below "Conversation". Overall, French are much more inclined to save money (with short-, mid- or long-term safe bank products) than buying using a credit. As of January 2014, French save 15.7% of their revenue (11% in Europe, 4% in the USA) for a total of 4,200 billions € stored in banks. French usually do not have more than 20-40 € in cash in their wallet as payment with a debit card is accepted almost everywhere without any extra-fee. However, the shop has to display the minimum amount of money to use a debit or credit card: from 0€ for parking tickets, to 8-15€ in most other shops. Note that you cannot pay a fine with your credit card. The basic politeness is to finish every plate (except decoration vegetables) and finish your glass of wine. However, it is always the host's responsibility to adapt himself/herself to your taste and to make you feel as comfortable as possible. In France, the aristocracy priestess for the "common people" is Nadine de Rothschild as she married the baron Edmond Adolphe de Rothschild then wrote several best-seller books on the "well-behaving in high society". A very significant example is when she appeared in many TV shows and people asked for the same question: "I know that cutting green salad is rude, so what can I do?". The answer was invariably: "There is nothing special to do. It is your host's responsibility to serve you a green salad in pieces small enough so you do not need to cut them". Not finishing one's food implies that the taste or quality was poor and it could not be eaten or the host does not correctly serve the quantity of food one needs. On the other hand, your host is supposed to serve you the quantity you want as many dishes are served on the table. Also, it is usually not considered rude that a foreigner does not finish his/her plate content, especially for very typical dishes where the taste or texture is known to be disgusting to some people (French or foreigner) like raw seafood, guts, snails... Your host should propose you to taste it first and let you decide if you want to eat more of it. If you are really disgusted by the meal, just stop eating and say that you are sorry but it is really not your taste. As rude as it can be, it is always better than being sick! Not finishing the wine is considered very rude as it indicates that the host has served a wine of poor quality or, even worse, it is a very good wine (so, very expensive) but it seems that you do not like it. If you do not want some more wine, put your hand flat above your glass when someone tries to serve you: As a new wine is served with each dish, keep some wine in your glass. When someone tries to serve you more wine, that it is not the same wine (mixing wines is absolutely forbidden). Say you have drunk enough (the French law allows you to drink two glasses of wine if you drive a car) and ask for water. The rule about not pouring one's drink first mentioned at the start of this article does apply. However, with a newly opened bottle of wine it is considerate to pour a little bit of wine in one's own glass first to check the wine is not suffering from cork taint. Children used to be given wine in small amounts to educate their taste, as well teens aged 14 to 16 used to be allowed to purchase and consume wine. This is now unlawful. It is a faux pas to judge a wine based on only one characteristic, such as the region where it is produced or, (most especially) price. You may have preferences for Bordeaux, Bourgogne or Beaujolais but it is not enough to judge a wine. The acceptable alcohol upper limit for driving is 0.5 g/L in blood (so 0.25 g/L of exhaled air). It correspond to 2 alcoholic beverages (almost 3 for a man). You can buy alcohol tests in pharmacies or in service stations but they are more than approximative. If you drank much alcohol, a decent French should propose you to sleep in-place. By contrast with some Asian or north-African countries where eating loudly or belching is a mark of respect, making noises while eating is considered extremely rude in France even in informal meals. Going to a dinner When going to a dinner: If it is a birthday, bring a gift for the man/woman's birthday. The price usually corresponds to how deep you know the person. For Christmas, try to bring a gift (even a small one) for everyone you know. For any other dinner, bring flowers for a woman and/or a bottle of wine/champagne for a man. If you are invited by a couple (and especially if the man is an expert in wines while you are not), focus on flowers. Do not offer roses as it would imply that you have or want to have a romantic relationship. The hostess is responsible for everything except the wine, which is her husband's responsibility (remember that the rules were created by the aristocracy and the bourgeoisie). When sitting around the table, the hostess should tell you where to sit. In informal dinner, the hostess will probably invite you to sit wherever you want. You should not start eating before the hostess sits down and invites you to start eating. Nowadays, as the hostess is also often the cooker, she might ask you to start eating while it is hot while she finishes serving the others. The French have a complex etiquette about wine and alcohol consumption, one example is never pour out unfinished wine or beer. Also the French seem to enjoy eating in longer and more frequent, later scheduled and higher quality meals. When in family and party settings, one of the hosts might say "Bon Appetit" before they eat. It is considered more as a vulgarity when said in public so it is not a common thing to do. Putting a piece of bread on one's plate is uncouth. Leave it on the table beside the plate. Also, rather than biting into a piece of bread, it is more polite to break off (not cut with a knife) a small piece and place it whole into one's mouth. It is inappropriate to rest one's hands under the table or to have one's elbows on it. French fries are eaten with a narrow fork. French people (especially men) are definitely more open on sexuality and the concept of personal beauty. Women are also open on sexuality but usually not when there is a man near to them. French sense of humor may lead to many misunderstandings and may even seem offending. French very often use so-called "second degré" (lit. second degree), i.e. an apparently serious (first degree) sentence should be taken in a humorous way (second degree). It may be difficult to make the difference and such jokes may appear as hostile or passive aggressive. French men also tend to make sexual or misogynous jokes while women do not really react against such jokes. Also the French are not as widely religious than in the USA, but do not view France as a "secular-atheistic-pagan" nation (a stereotype). Many French continue to declare themselves Roman Catholic (nominally) but they highly respect ones' own personal religion or theology. France is a laic country, so there is no longer any relationship between religion and laws, except the law defining the freedom of cult. By contrast with the USA, you never swear "on the bible" to tell the truth in a court of law; you just swear in front of the Republic. The French do not like to talk about religion, politics, socio-economic classes, ethnic and national differences, the idea of race, antisemitism, fascism, communism and American cultural influences. Even though, you can have an interesting discussion about those topics with one or two person(s). With more persons, everybody will talk at the same time and it will likely lead to nothing. Be careful discussing the French Revolution (1789-99), it is a historic "two-edge" sword. The French are proud of their national struggle for what the French Republic motto is "Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité". But there have been bloody massacres, civil wars, regional dissent, revolutionaries themselves executed for lacking compliance and counter revolts during the revolutionary period. Add-on: young people do not know much about the French Revolution and other wars. Napoleon is regarded as more of a French national hero, but some (and increasingly) view him as a war-hungry egoist dictator. However, nobody is really claiming all the bad things Napoleon Bonaparte did, even though he re-enabled slavery. Also when bringing up difficult history issues about: World War I, called the Great War. According to survivors, it was worse than World War II. World War II, including the Nazi occupation and the holocaust. Existence of concentration camps and death camps has been attested without any doubt through testimonies, photos, analyses of the skeletons, etc. Denying that is punished by French laws as "negationism". The wars in Algeria and Indochina gained independence from the French. Especially for Algeria. Nobody wants to recall that level of barbarism. Immigration from outside France and demographic changes currently changing France. International relations with its neighbors and membership of the European Union. All the benefits of being part of the European Union are eclipsed by the drawbacks. But all of that is like seeing the bottle half-empty or half-filled. Talking about the government is "gauche" in formal settings, as well by foreign tourists should show respect to France and its' personal experiences with difficult history. French morals and ethics include the right for terminated workers to stay in their desks until they can "officially" return home, and a dislike of war due to previous experiences. France is not a weak military nation; it has a history of fighting wars at home and abroad (and it is the 5th military power in the world). The French stereotype as "cowards" and dislike of American foreign intervention of wars is not a kind subject to bring up. The major belief is that the USA have much more money to invest into military power and also that they fight only when they have a financial interest to do so. Yet, this is a matter of debate. Also to note the French people do not appreciate stereotypes of them as "rude", "snobbish", "clannish", "chauvinistic", "smelly" and "oversexed". They are misunderstandings and exaggerations of cultural traits in France by outsiders unfamiliar with them, and most likely not true. Attitudes toward life tends to be more realistic, some pessimism and fatalism (more true in the North than in the South) and how life is something to be enjoyed regardless of the outcome. "Joie de Vivre" is a French expression of one's enjoyment of having life. People in Germany do not typically hug or kiss to be polite. Such affectionate greetings are usually reserved for close friends and relatives, and for private environments. Public display of affection, such as holding hands or kissing, is commonly accepted but may be inappropriate in certain surroundings (work, church, high class restaurants, etc..) Be wary of touching someone who is not an intimate or close friend. It may be considered inappropriate. This may extend to a person's belongings. Perplexingly, though, and especially in Berlin, Germans push and shove each other on sidewalks, on the subway, and in other public spaces. They may also shout at you and/or push you if they deem you to be walking too slowly. It is acceptable to sit with complete strangers in German restaurants or diners, especially when seating is limited. However, one should always ask if the seat is free ("Ist hier frei?") before sitting down. It is good manners to greet and say good bye to strangers in such situations as a waiting room or a shared table in a fast food restaurant. In some situations, like when entering an elevator, such pleasantries are optional. People often wish each other Guten Appetit ("good appetite/enjoy the meal") before eating. If the name of a person is known, it is expected to be added to a salutation (i.e. "Guten Tag, Herr/Frau ..." instead of just "Guten Tag"). People in Germany can use phrases like "please" and "thank you" more sparingly than many English-speakers and may use voice tones that sound unkind to those unfamiliar with inflection in the German language. Accordingly, be careful not to mistake this difference for rudeness or hostility when there is none. Many Germans make a strong division between work and personal life; calling a German at home to discuss business is rarely appreciated. Although discussing political topics is not generally frowned upon, it is impolite to ask how someone will vote in a specific matter. The Third Reich is a sensitive subject. Nazi symbolism and gestures are illegal in Germany, as is denying the holocaust. After you get to know someone well (which takes more time than in, say, the USA or even more than in California), he or she may broach the subject. Many East Germans lack knowledge of seminal events in West German history, such as the Berlin Air Lift. They tend to have a spotty view of German history and may be quite anti-American. Unlike West Germans, the East Germans seem reluctant to take responsbiilty for the Holocaust. Be cautious when discussing certain negative events of German history. Prussian nationalism and culture (many regions bulked at the time living under Prussia or Imperial Germany). Kulturkampf (anti-Catholic campaign in the late 19th century by the Lutheran Kaiser after unification, 1871). World War I (Germany and Austria surrendered to the allies, 1918). East Germany under the Communist era, plus the Berlin Wall (1961-89). About socialism and communism, though Nazism is the shortened term for "Nationalsozialismus" (National Socialism) and the authoritarian nature of the Soviet Union, esp. when the Soviets occupied the eastern half of the country under Josef Stalin. Immigration and race issues (although more liberal in gay rights). War and peace, very strong emotional issues for Germany as well all of Europe. A bunch of flowers should be presented as a bundle, without being wrapped. Eating only very little of the food placed on ones plate or leaving only a few bits on ones plate implies that the taste or quality was poor and it could not be eaten. If you are unable to finish what you have been served, be sure to express your gratitude for the very fine meal - and that unfortunately you can not eat that much. At work, people often bring cake or sweets or buy lunch for colleagues on their own birthday or when leaving the company. In some places it is also common to bring free beer on these occasions. Colleagues may collect money for a shared gift on such occasions. Waving of one's hand from left to right in front of the face is a gesture indicating that someone is crazy or deranged. The "tapped in the head" and "you've got a screw loose" gestures used among English speakers are employed by Germans as well. All of them are rude. Some of the points of etiquette mentioned here will hold true for German-speaking people elsewhere in Europe including those in Austria, Liechtenstein, Luxembourg, Switzerland, the province of Bolzano-Bozen in Italy and various locations in Europe (especially within Russia and Kazakhstan). When indoors, take off your outdoor coat and hat. It is considered rude to continue wearing a jacket and might make some people think you're just dropping in and might leave at any moment so that it's not even worth taking off your outer shell. In this vein, it might be considered disrespectful. For those unused to the cold German winter, a solution might be to take off your coat initially and than put it back on later when you feel too cold. Following an academic lecture, it is considered polite to knock lightly on the table/bench instead of clapping. The latter is considered inappropriate. Not knocking is usually fine, too. It has become impolite to refer to an adolescent unmarried female as Fräulein because the term has been used increasingly to refer to misbehaving little girls. All women should now be referred to as Frau. Source: Rebecca Falkoff Unintentional Transgressions of the Work Abroad Community Monster.com Actually its simply impolite to mark a woman as being available for marriage, which was caused by feminism. And this happened decades ago, so if your books still mention "Fräulein", they are VERY outdated. Germany has taken note of women's rights and gender equality, plus the anti-feminism of Nazi Germany and the idea of "equality of the sexes" in Communist era East Germany. German nationalism is generally a mild taboo, except in cases of "football nationalism" to cheer for the home team in European and World Cup soccer matches. Also many Germans identify rather with their Länder (home province/region). There are autonomous ethnic groups like the Sorbs (Wends) or Lusatians of Slavic origin in the East and Frisians related to Dutch and Low German peoples in the North and West parts of the country. Jewish-Germans are highly assimilated in German society, but do not take issue of anti-Semitism and religious practices in the public there. Avoid "splitting" people or "lumping" people by culture, state, religion, church, nationality and regionalism (i.e. "Alemmanic" and "Bavarian" vs. "Austrian" or "Swiss German", even "German" and "Franconian"). German pubs (especially older ones) commonly feature a bell hanging over the counter. One shouldn't ring it unless it is intended to buy a round for everyone in the establishment. In many cases it may be a local specification. In Greece, signifying "five" or "stop" by holding up five fingers with the palm towards the observer may be mistaken for an offensive gesture akin to the finger. When signifying "five" the palm should face the speaker to avoid a faux pas. A more obvious obscene gesture to be avoided involves making a fist with the thumb placed between the middle and index fingers. "Hello" might also be conveyed with a raised index finger and a closed palm. North American-style arm waving is rude. In a restaurant or other dining establishment, it is good manners to offer to pay for everyone on the table, especially when one has not dined with that company for some time. It is generally expected that this will be reciprocated in another setting. Friendly disputes for the check are usual. Close friends or young people generally share the amount when they dine together. When greeting someone, it is generally appropriate to kiss them if they are relatives or close friends, even of the same gender. A kiss on each cheek is usually appropriate. Some, especially the elderly, will take care to only touch cheeks with the person they are greeting. This does not diminish the symbolism of the gesture, and is done with proper hygiene in mind. While lack of table manners is considered a faux pas, a meal is considered a time of merriment, company, and celebration. Talking and laughter are commonplace, and one is generally expected to participate in such, even if it involves simply smiling or nodding. "Goodbye" is indicated by facing the palm towards yourself with fingers raised and then moving the fingers up and down. Resembling the gesture used elsewhere for "come here", this gesture can confuse non-Greeks. Most of the times, gesturing likewise with the palm facing outwards is also appropriate and understandable. "Yes" and "no" are indicated by nodding the head only once: downwards for yes and upwards for no. Shaking the head several times may be considered bizarre, uncivilized, silly or simply incomprehensible. Another way "no" is conveyed is by a slight raise of the eyebrows, often accompanied by a "tsk" sound. Failing to receive the message can result in embarrassment. Greeks have a saying about stingy people that amounts to, "he would not even offer a glass of water to his guardian angel." Not offering a guest a glass of water or other refreshing drink can be rude, especially when the warm Mediterranean weather has taken its toll on the visitor. Whether coming to sightsee or to pray, it is frowned upon to enter a church in short trousers, sleeveless shirts, or other immodest clothes. Christians of all denominations are encouraged to make the sign of the cross when entering a church; this obviously does not apply to non-Christians. In conversation, it is polite to have at least a basic understanding of how Greek Orthodoxy is distinct from the other Christian traditions. Using red ink or any non-blue ink may be inappropriate in many situations. Teachers are allowed to use red ink to mark errors in students' papers and they do so by default, but a student is supposed to not use any red ink. Compare with similar custom in Portugal. In Hungary, people traditionally consider clinking their glasses/mugs when drinking beer to be impolite. Clinking with any other alcoholic beverage, such as wine, champagne or hard liquor is customary. The reason people are not supposed to toast with beer is this: In 1848/9 there was a Hungarian uprising which failed. A benevolent liberal government by and for Hungarians was declared, but then subsequently it was put down by the Hapsburg Monarchy (Austria). In and after 1848/9 mostly Austrian prison guards toasted their victory over the failed Hungarian revolutionaries with beer. The Hungarians seeing this declared a ban on toasting with beer for 150 years, theoretically ending in 1998. Today, some Hungarians clink with beer and others still don't. Hungary is traditionally a wine-drinking country, though beer is also favored. Refrain from making jokes about or pointing out that the English name Hungary is a homophone with "hungry". Most Hungarians have been exposed to this joke many times previously. The red-white-green tricolor is the official state flag of the Republic of Hungary. The national flag is the same tricolor plus the national arms. Therefore displaying the national flag, e.g. by minority Hungarians outside the Republic of Hungary, such as Transylvania (today Romania), Serbia and Slovakia, does not constitute flying the official state flag of another country, making it less offensive to the majority of the particular country. The Hungarian national or state flag is never flown at half mast. Mourning is expressed by hoisting a black flag next to or in place of the national flag. The black flag is always full masted as well. It is removed when the deceased is buried. Hungarians celebrate not only their birthdays but their name-days as well. Name-days come from the Christian tradition of celebrating the lives of saints. This custom is extended so that not only Christian names appear in the calendar. Name-days are observed at a lower profile. Birthday cakes not included. Usually family, friends and colleagues drink to the health of the person feted and wish him well. The Hungarian date format is year + month + day. The year is very seldom represented by only the last two digits. The month is often shown in the Roman numeric format but using capitals. The 20th August 2007 is written like these: "2007. augusztus 20. ", "2007. VIII. 20." or "2007.08.20." It is considered to be rude not to share your sweets, chocolate, or fruits when in the company of family, friends, or colleagues, especially when children are around. One is not supposed to throw food away. It is considered to be especially rude to do so with bread. If one is not hungry or does not like the food served, he/she should offer it to somebody else. In a restaurant or cab, 10% is usually given as a tip unless servicing is included in the bill. No tips are necessary when paying by card. Tea is usually drunk with lemon juice. Sugar may also be added. Milk is not usually served with tea. Coffee is usually stronger than elsewhere. Milk can be used to make it softer. Men are supposed to take their hats off when entering a building or means of transportation. Men are supposed to take their gloves off when shaking hands. Men without a family relation shake hands upon meeting or saying good bye. A handshake should be short and firm. Touching somebody's elbow or pulling him closer during the handshake is intimidating. Men meeting women or women meeting women great each other only verbally. Kissing cheeks is common among female friends and, for family members, even between males. Not even parents kiss their children on their lips, that gesture is strictly romantic. Meals almost always start with soup. Poultry on bone can be eaten by hand. Hands are kept above the table throughout the meal. However, the lower arms or elbows are supposed not to be on the table at any time. Bread without dressing is never bitten, it is ripped instead. Do not lift the fork with its bulging side upwards to your mouth. Refrain from raising the knife to your mouth as well. Whenever possible, the knife should be used instead of a spoon. Eating in a group begins when everyone's food is served. Before starting to eat, everyone wishes a good appetite to each other. (Jó étvágyat! – 'yaw 'ate-vah-diat) When finished, you say "Egészségünkre!" ('ay-gace-shay-goonk-re, "To our health.") In Hungarian names, family name comes first, given name(s) follow. Foreigners are not supposed to change their names to comply with this rule, it is likely to cause confusion. Upon marriage, women can replace their original family name with their husband's one and keep their given name(s) just like in English. Or they can adopt their husband's entire name, including their male given names, and add "né" to the end. Or they can keep their original name and precede it with their husband's family name extended with "né". For example, Kiss Éva (family name: Kiss, given name: Éva) having married Tóth Péter (family name: Tóth, given name: Péter) can be called Kiss Éva, Tóth Éva, Tóthné Kiss Éva or Tóth Péterné. Of course, only one of these forms becomes official, whichever one the bride chooses. When numbers are shown by hand, Hungarians start with their thumbs. One is expressed by showing a "thumbs up", two is shown with the thumb and the index finger, etc. Four is very difficult to show because only the little finger is bent down. Hungarian people tend to take criticism very badly. Caution should be taken because criticism is easily interpreted as expression of discontent. Similarly, in a working environment asking many questions is often understood as not being competent or independent enough. Metaphors in the Hungarian language are very different from those of other European languages. They should be used with caution in order to avoid misunderstanding unless all parties involved are fluent in the language used. Only an odd number of flowers should be presented. When visiting family or friends on invitation, the invitee is supposed to bring some present. Bring flowers or chocolate to women, drinks to men. Do not bring food, not even salads or cakes, unless specifically requested to do so. In the country side, strangers or even loose acquaintances are not allowed into the house. If one is invited in, it should be taken as a courtesy and a sign of familiarities. Hungarians often tend to avoid continuous eye contact. It should not necessarily be taken as a sign of dishonesty. The commonly accepted personal space, i.e. the physical barriers you are not supposed to intrude upon, is somewhat smaller than in the USA, but they do exist. Avoid discussing the outcomes of World Wars I and II, and the pre-WWII and socialist eras. There is no general agreement of those times. Picking these topics often leads to endless arguments still today. Many Hungarians consider these regimes and their impacts as things imposed on them, blaming everyone but themselves. Royalty and aristocracy is considered to be a thing of the past and "undemocratic" by most Hungarians. Not even present-day royalty of foreign countries attract much attention. They are not a topic of discussion. Hungarians tend to talk about family and their status of health. The weather is not a common topic of casual chatting. Inquiring about political views or somebody's religion may cause eyebrows to raise. Offering a ride by car to acquaintances is almost compulsory if one takes the same route. It is rude to turn such an offer down in favor of public transportation. Referring to Hungarians living in minority in neighboring countries as Romanian, Serb, or Slovak is extremely offensive. They are five million in number altogether and can be found in every adjacent country of Hungary. Similarly, one must make a clear distinction and specify areas populated by over-the-border Hungarians instead of simply referring to the country, e.g. "I am visiting Transylvania" instead of "I am visiting Romania". Smoking is very common in low-class circles. In upper-class circles it is not, and lighting a cigarette could be considered impolite. When riding in a cab, the first passenger (the highest in ranking) should take the right rear seat. The second one should take the seat behind the driver. The right front seat is supposed to be taken only by the third person, if there is one. On public transportation, disembarking takes place before new passengers get on. The young and the men are supposed to cede their seats to the elderly and women, especially pregnant women or women with very young children. Women should be allowed to go through a door or enter a lift before men, except when entering public buildings such as a restaurant or pub. In a posh place, women do not open doors, move their chairs, handle their coats or place orders for themselves. Men are supposed to do that. There is a strong T-V distinction in Hungarian society. Calling somebody by his first name is considered to be equal to being on "T terms". It is very complicated, but in brief, it can be said that the older person, or higher ranked person in company hierarchy (or customer, doctor, etc.) should initiate using first-name terms. Somebody's profession is never used when addressing a person except for doctors or university masters with scientific degrees (ie. professors, Ph.D.). One driving in Hungary should be prepared for pedestrians crossing the road at any point, even at traffic lights at red. Bikers and motor bikers seem to be exempted from any kind of regulations and traffic lights. There is no enforcement of these rules for them. Shortly flashing your car's headlights means, contrary to many other European countries, "I let you go ahead". If somebody else lets you go ahead, you should thank them either by flashing your emergency signal or simply raising your hand. And don't point out that Hungary sounds like "Hungry" in the English language. It reminds them of experiencing famine conditions. It is poor humor to use terms like "Huns" to describe the Hungarian people as a foreign Asiatic race in Europe, though the Magyar people (their self-name) lived on the continent for over 1,000 years. "Hun" is also an ethnic slur used for nationalistic purposes by the allies against them and Austria or Germany during World War I, and again during World War II (esp. in the UK and the USA). Avoid referring to the area as Eastern Europe, preferring Central Europe, or central Europe, if possible in context. Although the Irish share many cultural values with the British (including some points of etiquette mentioned in regard to the United Kingdom elsewhere in this article), what is now the Republic of Ireland has been independent of the United Kingdom since 1922 and any confusion to the contrary is likely to be deeply offensive. British Isles is a geographical term, but in most contexts it is more polite to say “Ireland and the UK”. Similarly, referring to Great Britain as "the mainland" is likely to antagonize an Irish listener. The term "the mainland" in Ireland often means the Continental Europe. Although Éire is the official name of the state in the Irish language and will be seen on stamps, currency, etc., it is more common to refer to the country as "Ireland" in spoken conversation. It should never be referred to as "Southern Ireland". This may cause offense to nationalists, who view the entire island of Ireland as their homeland. Be aware of language politics surrounding the position of the Irish language. Some Irish feel it should be preserved at all costs for its cultural importance, others think it is an impractical burden. Know that the language is most properly called "Irish" (rather than "Gaelic" or "Erse") when speaking English while the name of the Irish language, in Irish, is Gaeilge. In some contexts, the terms "Ireland" and "Irish" refer to just the Republic of Ireland. Similarly in other contexts they include the province of Northern Ireland. For example, phrases such as "The Irish Economy" and "Irish Politics" exclude Northern Ireland. Meanwhile "Irish weather" and "Irish Music" almost certainly include it. (One almost has to be Irish to understand the subtleties of this usage and the Irish do understand that other people may be confused.) In Northern Ireland, be particularly aware that some people identify as "Irish" while others identify as "British" and a faux pas made in this area will rarely pass without comment. The term "Northern Irish" is perhaps least likely to offend. Asking people whether they are Catholic or Protestant is insensitive. Many Irish will remain pleasant and polite rather than reveal their displeasure over certain actions by strangers. Touching someone to get their attention (except in extremis) or accidentally touching someone without saying "excuse me" or "sorry" is impolite. This especially counts if said person is a stranger, such as in a shop or pub. Summoning shop workers or servers with gestures, or particularly with snapping of fingers, is considered rude (as also in the UK). The legal ban on smoking in workplaces (including bars, restaurants and offices) is almost universally observed. When visiting, rather than lighting a cigarette in someone's house or asking permission to smoke, ask to be excused to step outside for a cigarette. It is generally considered polite to hold a door open (Or give it an extra push open) rather than let it close in the face of someone following you. If someone opens or holds a door open for you, you must always thank them. Likewise it is considered normal to offer a seat to an elderly, disabled or pregnant person in buses or trains. Usually it is customary when visiting a person's home to bring something to eat as a complement to the tea or coffee on offer, even if not intending to have any. It is generally considered impolite to accept something on the first offer; the offer is simply a gesture of openness. If the person insists, however, it may be impolite not to accept. When visiting, guests are obliged to accept a beverage (at least) and perhaps a snack. It is not impolite for a guest to make a request such as "do you have anything cold to drink instead?" but a request that is too specific ("do you have coffee?") and cannot be filled may distress a polite host and have undesired results, such as the host sending their spouse to buy some. Saying one is "on a diet" will usually result in some polite badgering but saying, "No really, not tonight thanks" is adequate, even if you have provided the accompanying snack (such as pastries or biscuits). When passing in the street, if eye-contact is made it is considered impolite not to acknowledge the other person in some way. This is usually in the form of a simple casual greeting, a nod or a smile, with a quick glance away to avoid misinterpreting it for flirting. When invited to a person's house for dinner, it is considered polite to bring chocolates (such as after dinner mints) or a bottle of wine. Do not bring food other than
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