@Monstre (Monstre) posted a new topic, subject "24: Season 6: Episode 18 (11:00pm - 12:00midnight)". It read:

   **FAQ Bauer (aka Thread Rules)**  
    _1) What can be discussed in plain text, unboxed?_  
    A: Any events in episodes, once aired on the east coast – as well as any speculation based on these already-aired events.
    
    _2) What should I confine to spoiler boxes?_  
    A: Any discussion of upcoming shows that contains information from sources outside the aired material, or any speculation based on such things. This includes the “Next week on 24” previews, which some people choose not to watch.
    
    _3) So why is Jack really upset at the Chinese?_  
    A: That rug, it really tied the room together, man…
    
    * * *
    
    Previously on 24…
    
    After a nice fake-rescue ploy, Jack goes into action, not bothering to wait for reinforcements. The 2 remaining nukes are recovered, and Fayed's claim in his e-harmony ad (“well hung”) is finally true. “Damn, Jack…”
    
    Meanwhile, President Wayne “Must-Stay-On-Feet” Palmer is probably going to explode after continued adrenaline shots. I don't know why he can't lie down, rest a little, and issue executive orders while having his feet rubbed by a hot and scantily clad nurse. Of course, now he's liable to collapse before the day is out, and Vice President Wild Bill Hiccup is gonna to get to nuke somebody after all. Yee-haw!
    
    Act 2 begins – Audrey is alive, and somebody will finally be on the phone giving Jack orders that go against “protocol”. “Jack vs. China: Grudge Match” starts tonight! Let the rogue agenting begin…
    
    Oh, and there's some kind of soap opera going teresa66@example.org. Somebody is jealous of somebody and giving somebody the evil eye. Or something…
    
    * * *
    
    _24_ , Season 6, Episode 18  
    11:00 PM - 12:00 midnight
    
    SPOILERS AHEAD!
    
    Season 6 threads:  
    1-2 3-4 5 6 7 8-9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17
    
    Season 5 threads:  
    1-2 3-4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11-12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23-24
    
    Season 4 threads:  
    1-2 3-4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23-24
    
    Season 3 threads:  
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24
    
    Season 2 threads:  
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24
    
    Season 1 threads:  
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

After which, @randwill (randwill) added

    I'll start with the most obvious blunder. The Chinese couldn't have possibly known that Jack had secured the suitcase nukes within, what, a couple of minutes of it happening.

To which @athelas (athelas) replied

    Well, one of the 27 moles in CTU may well be working for China.

Then @carnivorousplant (carnivorousplant) said

    randwill:
    
    > The Chinese couldn't have possibly known that Jack had secured the suitcase nukes within, what, a couple of minutes of it happening.
    
    How many times must I tell you, Doyle is this season's mole.

After which, @Merijeek (Merijeek) added

    athelas:
    
    > Well, one of the 27 moles in CTU may well be working for China.
    
    The bathrooms at CTU must hear more muttered conversations in foreign languages than your average Casablancan IHOP…
    
    -Joe

Then @Monstre (Monstre) said

    athelas:
    
    > Well, one of the 27 moles in CTU may well be working for China.
    
    Doyle would want to start by checking out CTU Agent Wu. But his system was probably compromised because he was looking up Asian porn earlier at his station.
    
    Jack doesn't need to call Wayne. He needs to call President Suvarov. “Mr. Ruskie-Prez? This is Jack Bauer. Yes, the guy who keeps saving both our country's asses. Say, can you aim a few of your nukes at China for me? Thaannnnnks…”

To which @Monstre (Monstre) replied

    I liked the little exchange between Morris and Chloe:
    
    Morris: You're going to hold this over me, aren't you?  
    Chloe: Yes…  
    Morris: Any estimate on how long?  
    Chloe: I'll get back to you.

@Oslo_Ostragoth (Oslo Ostragoth) replied

    Monstre:
    
    > I liked the little exchange between Morris and Chloe:
    > 
    > Morris: You're going to hold this over me, aren't you?  
    >  Chloe: Yes…  
    >  Morris: Any estimate on how long?  
    >  Chloe: I'll get back to you.
    
    Ditto!

To which @MaxTheVool (MaxTheVool) replied

    I loved this episode. I can't really explain why, as it piled hilarious implausibility on top of hilarious implausibility. But the way they turned the plot around so that it's once again Jack vs. the world, rogue CTU agent extraordinaire… I applaud them for that.

Then @vinniepaz (vinniepaz) said

    Well, at least now we can stop hearing that awkward, stilted usage of the phrase “suitcase nukes” so often. It just seemed so out of place and fake to constantly call them that…

So @MEBuckner (MEBuckner) replied

    vinniepaz:
    
    > Well, at least now we can stop hearing that awkward, stilted usage of the phrase “suitcase nukes” so often. It just seemed so out of place and fake to constantly call them that…
    
    “Suitcase nukes” is nothing compared to all the “Mr. President, the ambassador from the country Abu Fayed is from is on line one.” “Mr. Ambassador, I will personally hold the country from which you are the ambassador responsible if another nuclear bomb goes off on U.S. soil.” “Admiral, prepare to launch a nuclear strike against the country with whose ambassador I was just speaking with.” But of course the writers of the television show which is the subject of this thread have no problem at all with “China did this” and “China did that”. ) You know, China: upwards of 1.3 billion people, the world's second-largest economy–or third if you count the EU as one country–and _actual nuclear weapons_.)  
    Man, my interest in this season just fell off a cliff. We've gone from (literally) _millions of people may die!_ to…Audrey. And some stupid circuit board. Whatever.

Then @Monstre (Monstre) said

    MaxTheVool:
    
    > I loved this episode. I can't really explain why, as it piled hilarious implausibility on top of hilarious implausibility. But the way they turned the plot around so that it's once again Jack vs. the world, rogue CTU agent extraordinaire… I applaud them for that.
    
    This one teased us with Rogue Jack from the beginning, then reversed it and had captured-Jack-but-backed-by-presidential-order. Then back to Rogue Jack at the end. And you just knew that the “keep it secret” phone call from Buchanan was not going to fool Jack. I liked his showdown with Ricky I mean Doyle. The gist being – “This morning, I shot the guy you're replacing – and I _liked_ him…”
    
    Except Bill Buchanan is now wising up to the fact that any time Jack goes rogue, Chloe will help him.
    
    Although, technically… Jack's not really on the CTU payroll, right? Hasn't really been since season 3. He can pretty much just argue that he's acting on “the USA **owes** me 6 times over” authority by now.
    
    Friend I was watching with called the presidential collapse timing – I was trying to figure out the Veep's angle when he was talking about tendering his resignation, thinking “it can't be that easy”. But then I remember how it was with Tom Lennox, about to quit. Something had to get the Veep back in the seat – and now he is.

So @Monstre (Monstre) replied

    MEBuckner:
    
    > Man, my interest in this season just fell off a cliff. We've gone from (literally) _millions of people may die!_ to…Audrey. And some stupid circuit board. Whatever.
    
    Well, it is more like the start of season 1 – Jack was acting only to save his family at the time.
    
    Although this seems like a situation where they could just send in Special Agent Kim Bauer.
    
    _Kim wanders in to the Chinese hideout by mistake_  
    _Kim gets captured and handcuffed to a railing_  
    _a cougar wanders in and eats the Chinese torturemaster_

After which, @Merijeek (Merijeek) added

    Monstre:
    
    > _Kim wanders in to the Chinese hideout by mistake_  
    >  _Kim gets captured and handcuffed to a railing_  
    >  _a cougar wanders in and eats the Chinese torturemaster_
    
    We will get to watch the infamous ‘Chinese Tickle Torture' scene, right?
    
    -Joe

@D_Odds (D_Odds) replied

    So Jack's a rogue agent again. _And this time its personal._ What will he yell when he pistol whips someone for information, instead of ‘OR MILLIONS MAY DIE'? ‘OR AUDREY MAY DIE' just doesn't have the same ring to it.
    
    If only Vice President Cy Tolliver had been a little quicker with his note, then this stupidity in D.C. could finally end. He needs a moustache to twirl. And while this weeks best line came from CTU (conveniently located 10 minutes from all of Los Angeles), that place is still dead air-time.

So @tdn (tdn) replied

    I liked the part where Jack and Doyle arrived at the drive-in theatre.
    
    What?

To which @Monstre (Monstre) replied

    D_Odds:
    
    > So Jack's a rogue agent again. _And this time its personal._ What will he yell when he pistol whips someone for information, instead of ‘OR MILLIONS MAY DIE'? ‘OR AUDREY MAY DIE' just doesn't have the same ring to it.
    
    Let go of Audrey NOW! Or billions of Chinese WILL DIE!!!

So @MovieMogul (MovieMogul) replied

    Not that we're on the Audrey (whom I like) tangent, does this mean no more Papa Bauer? Or is Rogue Jack going to need some assistance? No more Tony or Curtis and Chloe's out-of-the-picture, whom else can he go to?

@Lakai (Lakai) replied

    Whoa, Jack asked the President for a favor? Jeez Jack, you only saved the country like six times, who do you think you are?

Then @c_goat (c_goat) said

    The whole fear of the Chinese actually getting the device, and “Russia will know we gave it to them” was stupid.
    
    “Hey, Subarov, what's up? Bad news, dude, it turns out Fayed took out the FB board from one of the nukes and sold it to the Chinese. Guess that's your bad since your country lost the nukes to begin with, huh?”
    
    I'm just glad to have rogue Jack back.
    
    EDIT: Wrong you're, duh

To which @JThunder (JThunder) replied

    So what's going to happen to Chloe, now that she has crossed Buchanan again? Dare we hope that she'll go rogue, perhaps working in the underground?

After which, @carnivorousplant (carnivorousplant) added

    JThunder:
    
    > Dare we hope that she'll go rogue, perhaps working in the underground?
    
    I can see her now, working out of a bar with wireless access, laptop in front of her, taser beside her.

@Cat_Whisperer (Cat Whisperer) replied

    After I called something stupid for about the tenth time last night, my husband said, “Turn your brain off and enjoy the ride” or something like that. Excellent advice if I am going to keep watching this show.
    
    Well, you like Audrey and she likes you; obviously that is more important than the entire world being thrown into World War III. What was I thinking? Never mind that hanging around with Jack is like a death sentence for her anyway. And she's stupid enough to go to China to look for herself; couldn't possibly have hired anyone to do that, uh-uh.
    
    We do like putting words in Jack's mouth, though; “You're only alive still because I didn't feel like driving.”

Then @ShiefferSaw (ShiefferSaw) said

    I wish they had just made a huge ending with the nukes. I dont see how there can be a climatic ending with the whole Jack and Audrey sub-plot. No pun intended.

@carnivorousplant (carnivorousplant) replied

    featherlou:
    
    > We do like putting words in Jack's mouth, though; “You're only alive still because I didn't feel like driving.”
    
    You can't beat whoever said up thread, “I killed the guy you replaced this morning, and I _liked_ him.”

Then @Cat_Whisperer (Cat Whisperer) said

    carnivorousplant:
    
    > You can't beat whoever said up thread, “I killed the guy you replaced this morning, and I _liked_ him.”
    
    Yeah, I wish we'd thought of that last night. We'll keep working on it. You all are just lucky you don't have to watch tv with us.

Then @Finagle (Finagle) said

    With all their sophisticated technology, you'd think someone at CTU would have heard of a device called a “tape recorder”. Can you imagine how embarassing it would be for the Chinese to hear a recording of “Hi. We have the daughter of your ex-secretary of Defense, and we'd like to trade her for nuclear technology.”
    
    (Speaking of which…how come we won't name some flea-infested Middle-Eastern country as the home of terrorists, but we're willing to readily identify Chinese and Russians as terrorists, kidnappers and terrorists. What, do those countries have a history of being good sports about bad publicity?)
    
    Really, it's one thing for the Chinese to kidnap and torture Jack who arguably deserved it for staging a raid on their embassy, but to kidnap a high profile civilian like Audrey? Even Vice-President scumbag would be raising 18 kinds of diplomatic hell.  
    And I'm thinking Jack is looking darned chipper for someone who was tortured, starved, and interrogated for two years and then put in a long day of being tortured, beaten, and driving in LA traffic.

To which @Evil_One (Evil One) replied

    I enjoyed the look on the Vice Presidents face when Wayne collapsed. “Dum de dee dee do…I'll just slip this back in my jacket…”

After which, @Merijeek (Merijeek) added

    Finagle:
    
    > And I'm thinking Jack is looking darned chipper for someone who was tortured, starved, and interrogated for two years and then put in a long day of being tortured, beaten, and driving in LA traffic.
    
    Oh come on, Jack spent the last 18 months being tortured and imprisoned. You don't think he spent every moment fantasizing about getting loose and killing a couple hundred terrorists in LA?
    
    Dude, he's running on 110% Pure Happiness right now.
    
    -Joe

So @Monstre (Monstre) replied

    Merijeek:
    
    > Oh come on, Jack spent the last 18 months being tortured and imprisoned. You don't think he spent every moment fantasizing about getting loose and killing a couple hundred terrorists in LA?
    
    I rather think he spent his time fantasizing about solving the overpopulation problem in China.


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