67c5ab35_Female_Sexuality___2005_Topics__Post_Text
[Topic ID] 122 [Post ID] 813 [Date & Time] 2005-11-14 11:03:21 [Post Text] 
Aha, here is where I come in useful. That wall, all of us vag sufferers know that all too well. I am a sufferer of vag and, at 26, have never been able to have ic because of it. It felt like there was a wall when& I tried, like there wasn't even a hole. I could have a finger inserted at any time but vag sufferers are all different, some can have ic but not have exams like smears and other are the other way around, this is called situational vaginismus, some can insert a finger or two, other can insert nothing at all at first but it is curable although it can take some time and a lot of patience. If you read the thread I started a little further down the board, you'll get a bigger picture of my story and the things I'm doing and also get a better picture about vag as a whole but do as much research as you can about it and get her to as well. It is possible she doesn't have vag but I'd recommend her getting checked out and researching it all the same and also, if she does think that she has it, to join the support groups where I am a member and she can talk to us lot about all things related to vag and other sex issues without feeling judged. I'll gove you the links to them both if you want. One is for primary vag sufferers, those who were never able to have ic, and the other is for all vag sufferers be it primary or secondary. Secondary vag often crops up where a woman might start experiencing pain due to infection and this trains her muscles to start clamping up even when she used to have pain free ic or it can crop up in women who have been raped etc...plus other reasons, even simple change in partner can cause it or a long period without ic. There are lots of websites that describe vaginismus and such if you want to look it up but researching on sexual anatomy and sexuality in general is also a must. I found the clit.com site very useful. If she seems tense as soon as your penis touches her, I know that feeling, chances are she is frightened of the idea of penetration, expecting pain or even injury and this is what causes the muscles to spasm, the brain tells them to do so, her subconscious, she has no conscious& control over it. Curing vag means retraining your brain. If she does have vaginismus, I strongly recommend not trying intercourse for a while because if you do try and it causes pain, this will reinforce her subconscious that pain will come on any attempt at penetration and this will make her muscles spasm even more and make the whole condition worse. Please try not to get impatient with her, ic isn't everything and there are still plenty of other things you can both do and enjoy. Too many blokes run in the opposite direction when confronted with something like this because they can't live without ic but you can prove how much of a real decent man you are by sticking around and helping her to cure this and, when it is cured, you can feel proud knowing you stuck it out and that it was partly your support which enabled it to happen. There is also a yahoo group for partners of vag sufferers if she does turn out to have this and you would like to talk to other men who have partners going through this same problem. & I'll be glad to help if you have anything more to ask.
The-Clitoris.com - Old Discussion Forum From 2005 to 2009: Female Sexuality - 2005 Topics
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