`` so you saw him , '' she said , steering the conversation back to the reason i was here . now , it makes me wonder if i had learned what it feels like to be a tree , or even , strike me dead , a gray cap . maybe he was hurt and angry because he 'd found out she was a liar , even though she was n't sure why . beth shivered as she remembered that part , causing a sudden wave of pain to run through her whole body . 