`` do n't feel guilty for taking care of yourself , '' he said quietly . `` i want to be strong , '' i say over the screams , the blood , the begging . jennifer turned to her , trying to look disappointed . it ran on for about ten yards and then opened like the mouth of a funnel into a nightmare desert world . then , when he gets tired of me , he moves on and were free again . more than protection , however , the lit fires provided a measure of comfort for us at night . 