i thought i could do it tonight , but ... '' i listened as his voice sadly trailed off , so wanting to help fight whatever demons he was dealing with . i can feel him judging me , even before he opens his mouth . swearing , i turned and dashed back up the swaying stairs . i do n't know why you would doubt me . more hotel residents in one place than he 'd ever seen before . after i was clean and dressed , i ran down to the barn . 