instead , i thought about that tiny heart beating so very fast , as though i could feel that thrum-thrum-thrum against the tip of my tongue . thus the person trying to explain themselves will develop broken record syndrome . `` do you want to rack them again ? '' you could see the light bulb go on in her mind . i expect her to push me away or hold back , but instead , she meets me hungrily , her lips searching and bold . how does my father owe you ? '' the screen suddenly cut to the president . 