if it was a nightmare or a horrible movie –- but unfortunately it really happened. everything has changed and nothing will ever be the same without her. i admire all couples who manage to stay together caring for a sick child and dealing with grief. in our case, it did not work out and i know that we are not the only ones. having a sick child sure is a challenge for every relationship. both of us were in pain but as our lives were so different –- him working and i at home with the kids -– our needs to deal with the pain were completely different as well. 