`` how will we ever move forward together if you always leave me behind ? '' she leaned against the house , waiting to see if perhaps a light would come on . what the hell is all this stuff , anyway ? `` did n't think about it at the time , except later ... '' i paused . i stood up to get a better look . damn , that felt good-to laugh and relax . she tried about two dozen varieties , bought nothing , and took her time about it . 