but sometimes you have to do get ugly to make things happen . i ca n't bring myself to ask if i 'm hurting her . hopefully , not until i can get home ! and the toy in his hands . `` how much harm could they do ? maybe i was n't pulling my weight yet , but i could work on it . jack had almost been in the running , she commented with interest . a cruiser was waiting to take us back to the place where we had both almost met our end . 