for her , nothing topped the life-vow , even the thought of the heavens opening . he made another stop at a drugstore where he bought a handful of candy bars before returning to his underground lair . i never cried a tear of self-pity . the books i needed were on those shelves . i kicked off my blanket , tucking my hands under my arms . she had a sweet quality and a goodness that her difficult life had n't killed . she wanted to slap a hand over his mouth . 