she looked at him , watched as the little ball of fluff with a huge white bow around its neck licked and loved him . after a time , i force myself to nibble on a cracker , which helps settle my stomach . at first she didnt know what the noise was , then she recognized a distinct hoot and relaxed into the warmth of jasons chest . five minutes had passed when he came back into the living room . i cracked three eggs in a blue bowl toby put down in front of me . fighting back only makes things worse . 