she glanced quickly around again , reassuring herself that she was not alone here on the sidewalk . i sit in one of the chairs and stare at him . he mightnt wish to see me . if she lived or died , it was to be his decision alone . i leaned over and patted her shoulder . i asked , praying in vain it would be easier . he says i will feel sick and not know why . as soon as she thought of him , she tried to pull away . i hung up before she could say another world . 