we could take a hike up into the hills and then come back and watch a movie , i said . `` i can do what i wish with him . '' phrases like `` no need to tell others of this '' and `` do not wish to cause alarm . '' that 'd be my boy , she said , or rather colin 's . in fact , you seem to be having-dare i say it-fun ? '' past her fear and the hurt , the desire had always been there . 