race matters, but only so much--what's most important is who we are on the inside. writing it (whatever it is) is the only way to allow it to develop, to make sense of it, to figure out where it wants to go and what it wants to be. i guess the short answer, beyond "hell if i know," is "get someone else's opinion." do you do anything special for father’s day? now open the lid and mix the coconut mixture well. 