he 'd want to know why , and i ca n't come up with a convincing reason other than the truth . chaos broke out as soon as the doctor came in the room and looked between my sister 's legs . youre awfully quiet this morning , my manger remarked . `` your worst nightmare , '' i said in a spooky voice . so i meet with him once a week . `` he had a rare form of cancer . and now- -she 'd torn it up ! i was n't going to talk about this . 