a heavy feeling rests in my chest , as though all my blood has solidified and is too heavy for my heart to support . he moved to leave the ring , but was knocked back by an invisible wall of force that bubbled and flashed where he hit it . then another day they spent a few hours on the beach . see if he could convince them to change the terms of their bargain . i had come to this party desperately needing something i could n't name . 