as soon as he had taken his seat , the audience was allowed to sit again . `` me , too , '' he said in a low voice . but when you get that depressed you do n't care . `` no , '' i said , `` but he needs to . '' it was the last thing i was expecting . i had the skills for war , but not the stomach for it . i pushed myself back on my elbows , trying to find the knife . the stone feels rough and cool on my skin . 