she was still holding his hand , and he wanted to tug her closer to find out if she tasted as sweet as she looked . `` i get wanting to help someone who ca n't help himself . throughout college i knew exactly what i wanted to become , '' he said . my head slides into a dizzy spin . shed needed reading-glasses back then at that time of life . and he was very , very good at his job . `` he knows things are out of control , but he wo n't talk to us . 