with the fear came a terror of our own mortality that we had put aside through the first years of the war . deb even after fifteen years , she knew he would not read her message at work . she woke up to see sunshine . this woman was just another person , another anybody who showered and didnt have to defecate in the bushes when all the park toilets where closed . they were closer now , almost to it . so he took me out and we ended up getting drunk . 