`` well , sometimes the lessons you learn remind you that you have to let your head run the show instead of your heart . '' and here he was , just trying to be friendly and joke around with her . my stomach wrenches , and i 'm right there ready to lose it . `` look , i do n't get this , '' he said . for a reason he never understood , unless she was listening for someone to knock on the back door , she kept the volume low on the television . 