she felt almost giddy after the stress of the morning . with any luck the gate would be free , and not engaged . wait , i have some coke back in here somewhere . and he was doing it right there , supper dishes not yet cleared away . which she could never give - even if she wanted to - without disaster . difference is im not going home . it was expected , and i was quite happy to go along with that . it 's hard work for not much reward . probably because she had to be f**king terrified . 