even holding it with two hands , i felt like i could drop it . `` think no more on these matters . '' outside every window were scenes of a thousand greens and a deep peace . that shore in the distance was an illusion . her heart twisted with pain at the thought of her brother 's death . `` you see , i knew i 'd blown it last night when i pointed out the bruise in front of everybody . '' she looked up and stopped what she was doing . 