plus i 'd put the tank top back on under the borrowed shirt and it gave me extra layers . an instant attachment to the child not yet born felt more solid than anything had in his life . `` sorry , '' she says , holding up a hand . she was waiting on the sidewalk when we approached . and then she seemed to have second thoughts and i panicked because i did n't want her to walk away . he 'd get the demon to come to him . he returns his eyes to mine , his smile disappearing instantly . 