it had been a long time since she 'd seen it or looked through it and could n't remember exactly where she 'd left it . `` they took some of the meat out of the freezer , but they left the cold cereal . but , do well my boy and you may rise to the top just as i did . he grabbed me , pulling me towards the bed . `` no , i 'm not okay with this , '' ivy said , feeling empty . and it had to do with someone he had lost . 