i took the short walk back to the front entrance where he stood waiting with an outstretched hand , the rain masking the tears that were no closer to slowing down . he still grinned and had twinkling eyes . just because i 'm not here to tell you not to ? i sighed and suddenly wanted to hold his hand , likely because i was pretty sure it would be the last time i did so . i was just a little nervous going in there . and thats all i have to say on the matter . 