her stomach turned , but she breathed some more . `` then we will petition the king . it was all we could do to get by . i never would have come if i knew you would have been dragged into it . when he did manage to pull himself together he went charging out of the room as if he intended to murder someone . that was how it often happened , she thought . and you are ... '' he paused as if to find the words , then spoke deliberately . 