if there was a future for him , after all . `` we still have five months left . '' sh sh sh sh sh , said the man . `` do n't hold your breath waiting for it , boss . '' scooting down the seat , i patted the steering wheel . im finding myself torn on this . within the hour , after splashing her face with elizabeths perfume , she went to sleep with the doll . a part of me that still needed to find him , even though i had no idea where to start . 