he 'd spent the past few days drowning his misery in a bottle and the only thing it had brought him was more pain . `` you ca n't just come here and demand i go out with you tonight when you wo n't tell me where and you wo n't give me any other information . '' as soon as we reached the first inn in which we had to lodge , i knew full well what i had done . i was frantically reaching for the man 's arm , hoping he would give me some kind of hope . 