`` it would look very suspicious if we claimed to be an acting troupe yet did n't have a performance to put on . '' `` no kidding , '' he said , and smiled a narrow , bitter smile . `` like something out of a fairy tale . '' only she got up that day . i often would find myself bending the rules , and sneaking out just to visit the town . i sip my water , finally managing , `` oliver , but it was completely against his will . 