one of my hands is still bound , but he turns me so that my back is to the wall . i stare at it like i do n't understand . i started moving , rocking my hips back and forth . `` i thought this was open and shut already , '' i said . `` now , you got to know that this baby is going to die , anyway , 'cause he 's got to have milk , and not just bread mixed with your spit is gon na do it , and we do n't have any milk . 