this was a chance to destroy a small part of xavier . it was that night i saw her in the flesh for the first time . lucy said surprised by the comment . yeah , youre right , thought beth feeling much calmer . still , i could n't leave him to bleed to death on the floor . i 'd decided that i would do it this weekend . `` gramps , grams i do n't even know what to say ? jay we dont like this any more than you do . she kept quiet and tried not to move . 