( CNN ) -- Without question , the most valuable thing I 've ever just found was probably a stray $ 20 bill . And that makes sense . People do n't randomly misplace their FabergÃ© eggs in the parking lot of a Denny 's . Cracker Barrel , maybe . It 's classy up in that joint . That said , I 'd like to think that perhaps one day I 'll accidentally trip over some insanely valuable hidden treasure in my own backyard that poked through the earth after a heavy summer rain . But the sad truth is that if I stumble past anything out there , it 's likely going to be a cartoonishly large pile of dog poop . Which is worth nothing . To date , my Great Dane has n't eaten any Google stock . Thus , until that glorious moment occurs , it seems my best bet for getting rich quick is to simply wander the beaches of Dorset , England , and hope that I happen upon a huge chunk of whale puke . Seriously , whale puke . You see , a popular trending story this week was about an 8-year-old British schoolboy who found a 600-gram mass of it in the sand that seems to be worth about Â£40,000 . For those of you keeping score in America , that 's 1.3 real pounds of hardened hurl valued at $ 63,000 . By comparison , a decent Lexus starts at half that and probably was n't yakked up by a sperm whale coming home from an all-night bender . `` Dude , I was a complete mess . Allen kept pouring shots down my blowhole . '' So why , then , is a giant glob of whale barf worth more than a luxury car ? Well , according to the Bournemouth Daily Echo , what the boy found is actually called ambergris , and it 's a highly sought-after fixative to prolong the scent of perfume . `` Pardon me , I could n't help but notice you smell like whale spew . Is that Calvin Klein ? '' These days , manufacturers mostly use synthetics . Clearly , the real stuff is hard to find , and the whales just do n't party like they used to . ( Though , deep sea crime statistics show 'ludes are making a comeback . ) Still , there 's high demand for actual ambergris , and young Charlie Naysmith is holding on to the mother lode . Even more amazing is the fact that his golden glob of whale heave may have been floating around the sea for decades . After all those years , it literally could 've landed anywhere , but it landed right at his very feet . It 's just like the old saying : Sometimes , you do n't find the whale vomit ; the whale vomit finds you . I think that was Whitman . So , now the lucky boy has to figure out what to do with his newfound treasure . As if selling it is n't the one and only option . However , his dad , Alex , says that at the moment , they 're just waiting for more information from marine biologists . While I appreciate their shared interest in science , I really ca n't stress this enough : SELL IT NOW ! IT 'S WHALE THROW-UP ! Look , I 'm all for learning , but if you happen to be holding a projectile from the belly of another living thing and somebody wants to give you money for it , you do n't ask questions . You ask for cash . And some Purell . The conversation should be rather straightforward : `` Yes . I . Will . Sell . You . This . '' Fortunately , the boy does plan to eventually make a profit from his discovery , and he could n't be sweeter about how he wants to spend it : He 'd like to build a house for animals . Though , the article did n't specify whether the word `` house '' refers to some large sprawling ranch or , perhaps , an English Tudor where gorillas and bears and whatever else can run around humping and fighting and breaking things . Think Noah 's Ark meets `` Jersey Shore . '' `` Please do not feed the Snooki . '' Anyway , if you plan to go out searching for whale retch , be prepared to have a bad time . The boy got lucky . You probably wo n't . And besides , there 's plenty of other good stuff from the ocean floor washing up on the beach . Apparently 'ludes are making a comeback .
` ` Apparently This Week '' is CNN Tech 's weekly offbeat look at social - media trends . This week , it breaks down a trending story about whale vomit . It turns out , the vomit is used in perfume and is really valuable . The finder wants to build an animal house . It will be like ` ` Jersey Shore ''