( CNN ) -- It was like Mary Pipher was on a runaway train of success . She had multiple best-selling books and was much in demand as a therapist and an inspirational speaker . And at one point in 2002 , she felt like she had given all she could give , and she suffered a meltdown . She detailed the struggles in her life and her recovery in her latest book , `` Seeking Peace : Chronicles of the Worst Buddhist in the World . '' And in the wake of that book , she is sounding an alarm about danger of being a joyless `` constant working machine . '' `` If you ask anyone how they 've been any more , they always say , 'busy , ' `` Pipher said . `` I 'm just stubborn enough that sometimes I say , 'You know , it 's been really slow for me lately , ' just to see people 's shocked looks , because nobody in America ever says that anymore . '' Pipher , the author of `` Reviving Ophelia , '' an acclaimed book that examined the stresses and perils young girls face , took some time off to heal herself by just sitting and enjoying simple things like birdwatching and viewing sunsets . Now that she has slowed down , she 's noticed how so many adults are living at a fast pace despite their feelings of being burdened , anxious and confused . She also fears that her too-busy country has developed what she calls `` a culture of anhedonia , '' or the lack of ability to feel pleasure and joy . `` People just are not laughing as much , '' Pipher said , adding that she rarely hears anyone walking around singing or whistling , like she did growing up . The psychologist says many people fault themselves for being too busy and think they just have to grab more control of their lives . Women put too many expectations on themselves : having a career , being physically fit , being in good relationships with family and friends , reading good literature , doing community work , recycling and buying green , and being involved in some sort of spiritual quest . And when they fail to accomplish all that in one day , she said , `` they go to sleep thinking , ' I did n't get done what I needed to , and somehow that is my fault . ' `` Men are also heading down the path of feeling like a failure , as more of them share the `` second shift '' work of child care , cooking and cleaning at home . But the workplace has n't shifted much to accommodate men who are more involved in their families , Pipher says . People 's efforts to squeeze so much more work into the unchanging number of hours in a day has caused them to abandon the mammalian rhythms that `` we 've operated on since the beginning of the human race . '' Breaking those natural rhythms , Pipher says , leads people to avoid eye contact as they tell themselves it might distract them from the busy and important work that they 've got to rush to do . Also , moving too fast makes it difficult to see anything that is n't moving at the same speed , again leading to people not seeing each other . `` That 's got to be some kind of enormous human tragedy on a cultural level , '' she noted . `` Our time famine is actually diminishing the quality of the human experience in a very serious way . '' Our too-frenetic lives also dulls our senses , she says , leading us to `` lose all capacity for joy , because joy comes from actually appreciating and being in the senses and being in the body . '' Pipher realizes that most people do n't have the ability or the money to take an extended leave , like she did for about three months . But she says there are other ways they can slow down . The author says she has become a `` seeker of moments '' : those times when you stop in your tracks and really pay attention to something beautiful or feel a connection to another person . She suggests ways others can capture such moments : . • Take part in any daily practice that allows for stillness and quiet , such as meditation , sitting and drinking a cup of tea , stopping to watch a sunset or just lying in bed and being aware of your breathing for five minutes every morning before getting up . • Make a gratitude list at the end of the day to remind you where there was joy , or something spontaneous or fun during the day . • Choose to make human connections by looking directly into the eyes of the barista taking your latte order , your coworker or your child 's teacher or day care provider . • Set aside an area in your home -- a room or even a chair -- that is the quiet or calm spot . And any member of the family can go there and be undisturbed while they `` deal with their own inner architecture for a little while . '' • Turn off machines and live as close as possible to olden times by walking , talking or cooking with others . • Interact with pets . `` Dogs and cats move at the same speed in 2010 as they did in 1910 , '' so there is a calmness in being with them , and they do n't care if you 're a high achiever or successful or well-paid .
Best - selling author Mary Pipher : People work so much they miss joy , other people . She says people blame themselves for being too busy , try to have more control . ` ` air travel is actually diminishing the quality of the human race ''