( The Frisky ) -- Men do n't have `` guilty pleasures . '' We own , nay , celebrate what 's bad for us . Our obsessions are points of pride , not shame . Some men feel no shame in gobbling three slices of pizza at once if they want to . You 'll never see a guy wolf down a small mountain of waffles with a side of bacon and squeal , `` Oh my gosh , I ca n't believe I ate everything ! I 'm so ashamed . '' We will shamelessly sit in a nest of pizza crusts playing video games for endless hours . Unabashed tears will crawl out of the corners of eyes when the hometown team chokes at the last minute . Beer will be quaffed , their caloric potency mocked . These are the things that make life worth living . Feeling bad about feeling good , even if the good is short-term , is for puritan chumps . If I could , I 'd go out everywhere in my sweat pants . Of course , overindulging has its prices . Sloth and gluttony are venial sins for a reason . But the whole idea of `` guilty pleasures '' is something that is lady-specific . Women feel shame over even tiny little hedonistic infractions . I dated a woman once who was very much my type -- hot nerd -- who was deeply embarrassed over her celebrity trash magazine addiction . She actually tried to hide her US Weekly 's from prying , judgmental eyes . Eventually , I staged an intervention that went a little like this : `` Please , woman , own your love of snickering over pictures of Hollywood stretch marks ! '' This is not to say men are n't susceptible to social pressures , and masculine stereotypes . There are things that , while not `` guilty pleasures , '' are ... minor vices . Things we are into that contradict standard male operating procedure . After all , one can not live on bacon and beer alone . But a lot of guys find themselves infatuated with hobbies , media , and creature comforts that do n't really fit the lumberjack mold . I 'll wager many ladies are the quiet guardians of their man 's not-really-secret , but not-really-public , quirks . I am not ashamed of anything . This is why I will admit to the following minor vices , and in the process , teach women that they can be loud and proud when it comes to the hours spent rehearsing pucker faces in front of the mirror . Boldly rock your `` guilty pleasures . '' Bubble baths . Anyone got a problem with that ? I love bath salts , bubbles , fizzy stuff that promises to magically transform your bathtub into a sauna . The whole kit and caboodle . There is nothing I love more than a good , frou-frou soak . Heck , maybe I 'll light a votive candle too . Quiche . I ate it this past weekend , in fact . That 's right . I shoveled French egg pie into my mouth . Yes , quiche , a food that sounds like an inappropriate bodily sound . It was delicious . It had spinach in it , and I washed it down with sparkling water . Sure , I could have eaten something drenched in cheese , or deep-fried . But the moment called for something sensible , delicate , and ... flaky , okay ? Quiche is awesome . Reality TV shows about shallow women . A recent minor vice has actually entered my life . Every Tuesday , I eat Chinese food and watch `` The Real Housewives of New York . '' Have you seen this show ? It 's like an open invitation to hate on women . Is this really popular female wish fulfillment ? All that chattering , and glittering ? They are a bunch of bedazzled banshees that suddenly make me understand why the French guillotined all the rich aristocrats ! Sigh . While I 'm not overly susceptible to gender norms , I think I need to go to the comic book store , or hit the shooting range . Oh , forget it . See you next week , my beloved `` Real Housewives . '' TM & © 2009 TMV , Inc. | All Rights Reserved .
Author believes that men celebrate pride instead of having ' guilty pleasures ' ` ` Our bodies are full of pride , not pleasure , '' he says . Still man has vices that contradict ` ` standard male operating procedure '' Author watches ` ` Real Men of New York '' every Tuesday .