( CNN ) -- By the end of last week , congressional Democrats and a few moderate Republicans succeeded in requiring most employers to include contraception as part of health insurance coverage , in spite of deep opposition from the GOP majority . Across the Potomac in Virginia , Democrats and , again , a few Republican moderates were able to soften or kill GOP bills that would have put into place humiliating obstacles to abortion . These are good things . Thousands of ordinary women across the country have been writing letters , sending e-mails , leaving phone messages , and buttonholing state and national lawmakers in support of cheaper contraceptive methods and greater access to abortion . Though they did n't get everything they want , many are , I suspect , thankful for the partial victories so far . But I have to ask -- where in these recent debates are the voices of ordinary men ? Why are n't we hearing publicly even now from husbands who are not ready to have children they would have to support ? Or from boyfriends who do not have the means to support a child ? Why do n't we hear more from fathers who are working two jobs so that their daughters can attend college and , if they wish , start on a career unencumbered by child-raising responsibilities ? Other than female-friendly lawmakers and a handful of TV news/comedians , older men have been curiously slow to publicly support women 's reproductive freedom . Do they really want their sons and daughters to have to take a second or third job in order to pay the costs of raising an unplanned child , or have to decide whether to risk an abortion ? The truth is , many men of the baby boom generation would prefer not to talk about pregnancy . Fetuses are not exactly what they chat about with the mechanic who 's fixing their car . For baby boomer women , on the other hand , the ability to control when or if you have a baby is nothing short of a miracle . We remember , as if it were yesterday , when the pill became available and the diaphragm was improved . We happily took charge of preventing pregnancy or resolving an unplanned pregnancy . And as a friend of mine remembers , it never occurred to us to talk to the men in our lives about contraception . As I 've gotten older , I 've realized there were consequences of not including male partners early in such discussions . At my college reunion a couple of years ago , a former male classmate confessed privately that when we were students , his girlfriend , also a student , had gotten pregnant twice . Both times , she had traveled hundreds of miles to New York , at that time one of a few states where abortion was legal . `` Were n't either of you using birth control ? '' I asked him . He muttered something that sounded like `` No , '' his eyes staring at some point over my shoulder . Had he accompanied her to Manhattan ? He looked surprised by the question , and then shook his head . He had the good sense not to appear cavalier about it all . But it was clear that he had never thought of birth control or abortion as a guy thing . I suspect his girlfriend had n't either . Could such cluelessness or discomfort help explain -- though by no means exonerate -- the silence of men of a certain age when male lawmakers introduce downright abusive bills relating to female reproduction ? I strongly suspect that conservative lawmakers will continue to attempt to control a conversation that many of us thought had been settled , and they have the money and party support to get re-elected . When I read how Texas and other states are passing bills that , in the words of columnist Nicholas Kristof , `` are treating women in ways that are patronizing and humiliating , '' I despair . Then I remember that many of these legislators are part of a generation that is moving off the stage of public life . I have hope that the generation that succeeds them will be different . Men in their 20s and early 30s had more sex education in school than their fathers did , often in coed classes . They are more involved in sexual decision-making with their partners than previous generations . Polls show that the majority of them , like the majority of young women , support contraception and legalized abortion . I recently talked to one woman in her early 20s who said her boyfriend keeps up with advances in birth control as much as she does . Their decision about which method to use is always made together , she said . Another young woman said she and her partner debated methods for more than a year , sometimes heatedly . They recently married , and she is happily pregnant . A young man told me that in the beginning of his current relationship , he and his girlfriend split the cost of her birth control pills . When he cut back on his hours at work in order to start graduate school , his girlfriend picked up his share because she was earning more money than he was . Once he 's earning more money again , he 'll resume paying part of the tab . It 's only fair , he said , adding , `` Women may have to give up a little control , but men can share the burden . '' Join us at Facebook/CNNOpinion . The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Laura Sessions Stepp .
Laura Stepp : As lawmakers try to restrict birth control , little is heard from men who support it . Stepp says thousands of women have protested plans , but men are n't coming forward . Stepp asks : Where in this debate are the husbands and boyfriends not ready for kids ? The House passed a bill that would require employers with more than 50 employees to provide health insurance coverage for contraceptives at no cost to employees.