( CNN ) -- `` Be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered . '' `` Thong type costumes are problematic . '' `` Avoid sheer see-through clothing . '' Is this the new edict of a religiously conservative government that wants to make sure that men -- and especially women -- are covered up ? Could it be the dress code for visiting the Vatican , the Wailing Wall , the Dome of the Rock or other holy sites ? Nope , these words are actually part of the wardrobe advisory e-mail that CBS sent to attendees of this Sunday 's Grammy Awards . Yep , CBS , the network that brought you a promo during last week 's Super Bowl for its show , `` 2 Broke Girls , '' featuring the show 's young female stars writhing on a stripper pole , is now concerned about sending the wrong message . The language that CBS used in explaining its clothing recommendations is actually hilarious -- it seems to have been written by a cross between an elderly lawyer and Goody Procter from `` The Crucible . '' Predicting the 2013 Grammy winners . Here are some of the highlights : Talent should , `` avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack . '' What exactly is `` fleshy under curves '' and why does it sound so oddly hot ? ( And by frowning upon the showing of buttock cracks , does this mean that many of the union plumbers working at the Grammy venue may also have wardrobe problems ? ) CBS wants attendees to avoid outfits that could `` expose female breast nipples . '' And the network also put its foot down on clothes that expose the `` bare sides '' of breasts , aka , the famed and increasingly popular `` sideboob . '' However , the most bizarrely worded wardrobe line is that talent must , `` be sure that the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible 'puffy ' bare skin exposure . '' What exactly is `` puffy '' bare skin ? Is that code for some word I do n't know about ? And why did CBS put the word `` puffy '' in quotes ? It sounds even dirtier that way . My big question is this : What caused CBS to be so concerned that this year it issued a written wardrobe advisory ? CBS has aired the Grammys for more than 40 straight years , dating back to 1973 . Obviously over that time we have seen some pretty risquÃ© outfits . Could it be because CBS wants to appease conservatives who freaked out over the outfit Beyonce wore while performing in the Super Bowl halftime show ? 21 questions for the 2012 Grammys . Right-wing radio host Laura Ingraham protested Beyonce 's outfit with a sarcastic tweet : `` Very family-friendly dancing S & M by Beyonce . What every girl shd aspire to . # waronwomen . '' A writer at `` The National Review '' penned a column entitled , `` Put a Dress on , '' demanding that Beyonce not wear a `` black teddy '' on stage but something less revealing . ( Of course , if similar language was espoused from people in the Muslim world , these same conservatives would denounce it as Muslims attempting to oppress women , but it 's somehow OK when they do it . ) The real reason is unclear . CBS declined to officially comment but sources there stated that a similar verbal wardrobe warning had been given in the past . What is clear is that this wardrobe advisory is not gender neutral . Its very language tells women what they can not wear . `` Female breasts '' must be adequately covered . `` Female breast nipples '' must not be exposed . Even where there 's no specific gender reference , we all understand that no one is concerned that Bruce Springsteen , who is nominated for a Grammy this year , will show up exposing the , `` bare fleshy under curves '' of his buttocks . No , CBS is more concerned with making sure that women are properly covered . 'Boss ' auctions guitar , lesson . Beyond the apparent sexism of the wardrobe advisory , we also need to keep in mind that freedom of expression is not just words . Freedom of expression also includes expressing yourself through the clothes you wear , especially for the talented musical artists attending the Grammys . These performers should be able to dress any way they choose , both men and women . A big part of the Grammys is enjoying the range of outfits worn , from the glamorous to the provocative to ones that make you wonder what was the bet the person lost that made them wear that outfit -- I 'm looking at you Nicki Minaj , who last year dressed like a bright red version of `` The Flying Nun '' and was accompanied by a man dressed like the pope . And of course , if someone wears an outfit that truly violates FCC regulations , then CBS should not allow that person on camera . That is not only CBS ' right , it 's CBS ' obligation . But the CBS wardrobe advisory note goes too far -- it both hampers creativity and imposes restrictions that are sexist . I hope that at Sunday 's Grammys we see people dressed as creatively and provocatively as they choose . Part of me even hopes that Bruce Springsteen wears an outfit that exposes his `` puffy '' bare skin -- whatever that may be . The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Dean Obeidallah .
CBS sent a wardrobe advisory e-mail to Grammy attendees to cover up well . Dean Obeidallah : The note is not only hilarious , it 's also sexist toward women . He says maybe CBS is trying to appease conservatives like Laura Ingraham . -- A woman who works at the White House was fired for wearing an Obama campaign T-shirt that said " I'm with her on this one " and she had been working there since 2009. Artists should be able to dress as creatively and provocatively as they choose .