( CNN ) -- It has been three days since Chris Stevens and three other Americans lost their lives in Benghazi , Libya . I lived and worked for four years in Libya , leaving hurriedly last year in an evacuation as the civil war began . I sit safely now in my new home in Qatar , and those who shared my Libyan experiences -- and who knew Chris -- are now spread out around the world . I know from their e-mails that , like me , they are also unspeakably sad . Every life on this good earth is precious , and all four Americans who lost their lives at the U.S. Consulate were in Benghazi to help the Libyan efforts . They will be very , very much missed . Because I knew and worked with Chris , I understand firsthand that the world has lost a true hero , and we seem to have precious few of those . Chris was smart , supportive , kind , approachable , very passionate about reestablishing a relationship between the United States and Libya and improving the lives of the Libyan people . He was a perfect candidate for his new role as ambassador . When someone like that is taken away , you do n't just mourn the loss of a colleague or friend , you mourn the greater loss for our planet . We were both originally from northern California , but Chris and I first met in Libya , arriving around the same time in 2007 . I was there as the new director of the fledgling American School of Tripoli and Chris had just been appointed U.S. Deputy Chief of Mission . The United States and Libya had reestablished diplomatic relations in 2004 , but the U.S. Liaison Office had just been upgraded to a full embassy in 2006 . Because no ambassador had yet been named , as deputy chief , Chris served as acting ambassador until the arrival of Ambassador Gene Cretz in January 2009 . Working in Libya at that time was challenging . The infrastructure that the West left behind had long disappeared during the 30 years of sanctions , and we were all scrambling to develop our institutions and businesses from the ground up . Chris built a team of embassy personnel , negotiated with a quixotic Libyan government , helped the returning U.S. companies and served as chairman of the Board of Trustees of the American School . He loved the school and in an e-mail earlier this year shared how much he was looking forward to witness its eventual reopening . During the two years we worked together , I watched Chris serve with aplomb , patience , and an easy smile . If you sat and talked with him , it was clear that he was well-read and a deep thinker , but he was always humble . He was also extremely comfortable whether he was speaking with VIPs or Libyan farmers . I had the good fortune to sit with him on the Fulbright Scholarship Committee that helped Libyans further their education in America , one of the many tangible ways he demonstrated his dedication to the Libyan people . He traveled across the sparsely populated country savoring the rich archaeological sites , and broke bread with Berbers in their cave homes . Always gracious , he hosted receptions for Libyan ministers and businessmen and , just as often , was in khakis and a T-shirt , holding informal embassy gatherings on the roof of his villa , smiling and making sure that everyone was included . What really made Chris exceptional to me , however , was his ability to distance himself . Not the aloof kind of distancing that you might expect from someone in his position , but the kind where one puts emotion and ego aside in order to truly listen , to understand , and then to find a way to build bridges . It is extremely rare to find someone who can do that , consistently rising above the fray , and that 's what makes his death so especially painful . Of course I feel anger at those horribly misguided people who are responsible for this tragedy , but I am also trying to rise above it , like Chris would . For those who find this yet another reason to vilify Muslims , I point to other examples of seemingly senseless violence like the Aurora movie theater shootings or the attack on Gabrielle Giffords , neither of which had anything to do with Islam . We live in a world where frustration and anger override the sanctity of life . We live in a world where it 's easier to get our hands on weapons than to give each other a helping hand . We live in a world where too many people use religion as a vehicle for hatred , rather than love . I was extremely fortunate for a few years to have lived and worked under the light of Chris ' grace and vision . I know he touched all who knew him . As I continue to watch the Libyans , who have only known oppression , try to dig out of the void left behind in the wake of Moammar Gadhafi 's fall , I will always remember Chris and the legacy he has left them . We are all better for having known Chris . My hope is hope that Libya will flourish for its people and that we , each in our own way , will make him proud . The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Judith Drotar .
Judith Drotar knew Christopher Lee when she worked at the University of Tripoli . She says he was kind , smart , approachable and had passion for helping international relations . She says they met when he was Deputy Chief of Mission ; he helped her establish the University . Drotar : He had rare talent for leadership , building bridges . His killing a profound loss .