( CNN ) -- I ca n't get the image of the bodies lying near the freezer at Westgate out of my mind , and recognizing two of the victims , their bodies splayed , their blood splashed against the stark white floor . There is a picture of an empty blue twin stroller , abandoned on the rooftop that I 've walked on countless times . There are pictures we did not air on CNN because they were simply too gruesome . It felt more shocking because this was a mall as familiar to me as the back of my hand . Read more : How does Al-Shabaab get its money ? `` Westgate was like home to us , '' said my father to me over dinner in the kitchen this evening . And he was right - the mall was practically our second home -- it 's where we met our friends , did the household groceries , and banking . I 'd often call home from London to find my parents at the new tapas joint sipping sangria , before that at Urban Burgers , Planet Yogurt or Artcaffe . Looking around now at our kitchen , the tea , coffee , white asparagus , beads , my favorite ice-cream ( toff n'choc with nuts ) wine glasses , mobile phones , are all from Westgate . `` Where shall we go shopping now , '' asked mum ? `` Nakumatt Ukay ? '' she said referring to a red brick shopping center 100 meters away from Westgate . Kenya mall shooting : Dozens of families waiting to hear about loved ones . `` But it 's in the basement , '' said dad , `` there 's no emergency exit . Let 's not go there . '' Kenyans like us , are thinking of great escapes in ways we never did before . Wherever we are , what 's the quickest route out ? We are on edge on the streets , in our cars , and nervous in malls . I was at a clothes shop at the Sarit Center mall looking for a new shirt to buy before presenting the `` Westgate Attack Special , '' programme and something clattered to the floor . We all jumped in fear . Kenyans debate : Time to get troops out to Somalia ? Friends and family are thinking twice about whether to go for dinner , lunch , run basic errands , and determine what could be safe and what is not . The national conversation has changed to security . Each passing day brings greater revelations about the terrorist plot and the government 's response . Every Kenyan I have spoken to is angry , about intelligence failures , and operational failures . Kenyans are acutely aware gunmen from Westgate escaped and many say our government has not provided us with sufficient answers : How ? Where ? When ? Why ? Yet the coming together of all Kenyans has been powerful . The diverse community has pulled together -- all races , all tribes that are often source of tension in Nairobi . Our politicians , bitter rivals , have supported the president . In the short term Kenyans expect to take an economic blow with fewer tourists coming here , less investment , less confidence amid the threat of further attacks . For the long term , many point to 9/11 in New York or 7/7 in London and note how life went on , and those cities bounced back . Kenya is the economic powerhouse of east Africa , that wo n't change . Kenyans are resilient , that wo n't change . Kenya leads the region in creativity , media , free press , biotechnology , arts , music , literature , none of that will change . Kenya attracts investment opportunities around the world , that wo n't change . Life will go back to normal : The matatu mini vans will break traffic rules , the traffic will be horrendous , the horses will race at N'gong on Sunday , Mama Mbogas will sell their fresh vegetables , someone will order a cold Tusker beer , and the hot smell of the Kenyan earth after it rains will rise , and so will the nation .
Zain Verjee describes how Kenya 's national conversation has changed to security . The Kenyan government is now more concerned about the threat of terrorism than it was a decade ago, and its response has been much less aggressive in dealing with militant groups like Al-Shabaab or al-Shaba@@ `` Kenyans like us , are thinking of great escapes in ways we never did before , '' Verjee writes .