( CNN ) -- If you gave most folks the choice between their smartphone and their nondominant hand , many of us would wave a one-palmed goodbye to Mr. Lefty/Righty , weld our iPhones to our wrists and grimly welcome an existence of Terminator-like efficiency . Yup , we 're addicted to those little bleating beasts , so much so that we fold them wholly into our workaday lives , blindly committing a cornucopia of social indignities with zero cognizance . Conversely , we look down our noses at those who commit the very same phone faux pas , hypocritically musing over their every social slight . Well , my friends , it 's time to stand up and take notice . We 're not asking you to wholly throw out the litany of bad habits below ( that is entirely impossible , and we will have executed at least four of 10 before the week is out ) . We merely ask you to be more aware of when you 're about to do something that , if done to you , would send you into a frothy fit of rage . The iPhone 4S may be sailing toward us on the wings of fall , but the aforementioned bionic scenario is still a ways off ( we hope ) . Let 's all try not to do these : . 1 ) . Walking while texting . We know that Harold totally needs to know that you 'll be 15 minutes late to his '70s-themed fondue party ( because you had a polyester-induced wardrobe crisis ) , but we 're pretty sure that the owner of that baby carriage that you upended in your fervor to alert H. does n't give a fig about your sartorial issues . And that kid 's later-life bed-wetting will be completely your fault . 2 ) . Pulling out the phone at the dinner table . Or pulling out the phone ( for any extended period of time ) during any social situation , really . Yeah , we know that the notion of beating your brother-in-law at Words With Friends has been haunting your very dreams , but your friend/family member/other of varying degrees of significance is probably much more interesting . If that is not , in fact , the case , consider hanging with your brother-in-law instead . 3 ) . Returning a call with a text . Unless you 're in a movie theater , at work or in the middle of an important life moment , said action makes you appear socially awkward . 4 ) . Crop-dusting . It 's Friday night and you want to RAGE ! Systematically , you scroll through all of your contacts , shooting them nearly identical messages : `` What R U up 2 2nite ? ? ? '' Whoever answers first -- or whoever answers with the best , most exciting plans ( jello shots and football and girls ! ! ! ) -- is the winner . And you have won , too ! You won the role of `` Flaky Tool '' among your disgruntled friend group . 5 ) . Messenger-pigeoning . You 're watching that brand new show starring the unmatchably quirky Zooey Deschanel on Hulu when a pal texts you , asking what time you want to have dinner later . You see the text . You think to yourself , `` 7:30 ... '' You commence watching Zooey dance and twirl . Three hours later , you text back , `` 7:30 . '' And thusly , you have transported humankind from a time of instantaneous communication to an era when we had to wait for rats with wings to deliver fecal-stained parchments across the sea . 6 ) . Drunk dialing/texting . You already lost most of your dignity when you entered that dance contest after slamming five tequila shots . Retain the remainder and give your phone to a friend . 7 ) . Lifecasting in lieu of living . You may have a problem if : your first thought when gazing up at a sun-splashed sky , rippling and luminescent like a melting watercolor , is `` I have to Instagram that '' instead of , `` Oh , pretty sunset . '' Similarly : When any semi-intelligent musing becomes worthy of a tweet . 8 ) . Digital dallying . You stopped physically seeing this dude/chick about three weeks ago , but you still text him/her every once in a while ( `` Whoooaaa , it 's like unseasonably warm today ! `` ) , you still comment on all of his/her stuff on Facebook and you 're currently engaged in a vigorous game of Chess With Friends . You have , in essence , become a DigiPet -- a presence on his/her phone that s/he keeps just barely alive by typing and texting . Very soon , however , your keeper will likely let you die , because you , like a DigiPet , are annoying and useless . 9 ) . Conversations in public . `` Yeah , I do think you should dump him . Cheating is just really , really unforgivable . Also , I mean , you do n't want to get crabs , right ? Oh ... I 'm sorry , I thought you were looking for my input , seeing as how you 've been sitting next to me at this coffee shop for the last 30 minutes , babbling into your earpiece about STDs . On that note , yeah , I think there 's a cream for that . '' 10 ) . Taking your phone into the bathroom . We 're sad that we even need to include this one .
There are lots of ways to avoid social faux pas with you 're friends . Unless you 're at work , do n't respond to a phone call with a text . Do n't be a DigiPet -- a presence on his / her computer that 's just barely alive . Your friend / family member is probably much more interesting than that text .