( CNN ) -- Of the two of us , Linda is the fan of professional football . And every football fan realizes football games are extremely violent . We are both also feminists . And every feminist knows the women 's movement denounces all forms of violence . For a woman who is a football fan , this can be hard to reconcile . So it was surprising to turn on the TV and find these opposing mindsets coexisting on the football field : Tough , hyper-masculine football players were wearing pink , a color associated with women and girls , femininity -- and sometimes vulnerability -- and also widely known to represent breast cancer . Who could not be delighted , at first , to see such an apparent break in gender stereotypes ? The NFL , it seems , has officially teamed up with the American Cancer Society with the `` A Crucial Catch '' campaign throughout October to fundraise and spread awareness about breast cancer . The campaign encourages women to get mammograms annually ( even though the current state of knowledge is that screening benefits fewer and harms more women than once believed ) . Does anyone doubt that the NFL 's support of breast cancer awareness is mainly a strategy designed to give the impression that the NFL cares about women , and generate more female football fans ? After all , from a public relations perspective , the pink ribbon is worth its weight in gold . Breast cancer has been the cause of choice for corporate marketers for almost two decades , sure to draw a crowd and profits . But there is another women 's issue , domestic violence , that touches many women and men , some of whom are professional football players . This , too , is an issue that would resonate with fans . And as it happens , `` Pinkotober '' is also Domestic Violence Awareness Month . Might the NFL throw the power of its brand behind this problem ? It would be a profound gesture from a perfect pulpit . After all , the most recent high-profile discussions in America about domestic violence have centered on the violent actions of Ray Rice , Baltimore Ravens ' running back , who was suspended from play when a video was released showing him punching and knocking out his future wife . But Rice is by no means the only professional football player identified as a batterer . Even in very recent NFL history , again and again other star players have been implicated in violence in their personal lives , including Vikings running back Adrian Peterson ; San Francisco 49ers ' defensive end Ray McDonald , who was arrested last weekend on felony domestic violence charges ; and Denver Broncos ' wide receiver Rod Smith , to name only a few . The incidence of intimate partner abuse in the United States is alarmingly high : One out of three women experiences this kind of violence , according to the American Psychological Association and World Health Organization . Since this violence is committed primarily by men , it can accurately be described as a men 's issue , too . Think of the impact of having a bastion of hyper-masculinity , like the NFL , shining a light on it . Of course the NFL has long been reluctant to focus on domestic violence . Even a recent set of PSA 's on the issue have been late in coming , short in duration and far from enough . Indeed , the league has repeatedly avoided , minimized and downplayed players ' aggression on and off the field , responding only when negative press refuses to die down -- as in NFL commissioner Roger Goodell 's finally admitting , weeks after revelations about the Ray Rice abuse incident , that he 'd handled it poorly . ESPN 's live feed of Goodell 's remarks revealed a stream of Twitter comments from players themselves who found his mea culpa to be pointless . This avoidance may be an attempt to manage public opinion . It might also be based in something psychologists call a shield of denial . Simply speaking , denial is necessary for effective human functioning , to provide psychological protection from thoughts and feelings , such as the prospect of death , too devastating to contemplate for prolonged periods . Shielding oneself in denial enables a person to get on with life , or with the game or the season . There is nothing unusual about this human process ; people prefer to feel good , not bad . But there are moments when it 's important , even necessary , to examine individual and cultural ideas instead of denying them . The painful truth about domestic violence is that it is harmful and terrifying and forces individuals to face an agonizing reality . Under a shield of denial , people predictably avoid the emotional pain of realizing that domestic violence is going on all around us , including in the NFL itself . But by staying shielded , by not speaking out against men 's violence against women , we quietly accept it . This is untenable . There is a purple ribbon to denote Domestic Violence Awareness , but there is no ubiquitous ribbon culture to gather around . The NFL can help . For the NFL to show it is serious about supporting women , why not lower the shield of denial about domestic violence and put the issue out there before the fans ?
Gayle Rubin , Linda Rubin : NFL observing Breast Cancer Awareness in October . Writers : NFL wants to protect women ; why not mark Domestic Violence Awareness month ? NFL has many high - profile abuse cases ; intimate partner violence ubiquitous in U.S. , they say . Writers : NFL in denial on domestic abuse . It would do good to publicly take up cause .