( CNN ) -- A few minutes of what was considered online fun , and one person is dead . Another is convicted of invasion of privacy and bias intimidation . When Rutgers student Dharun Ravi set up a spycam to catch roommate Tyler Clementi in a same-sex romantic moment , and when he tweeted about it and his plans to do it again , little did he think that Clementi would commit suicide or that he would face serious jail time and deportation . Ravi is learning his lesson the hard way . There are lessons for all of us : . What you do online can hurt people . Despite the adage about sticks and stones , words can and do hurt -- especially when anyone can publish information that reaches millions . The Internet is full of homophobic , racist , anti-Semitic and misogynistic content . At a minimum , hate speech is online pollution , but it can go much further . It reinforces stereotypes and strengthens the belief that singling out `` the other '' for abuse is acceptable . Hate speech can harden low self-esteem and intimidate its targets -- and even lead people to commit suicide . Online bystanders have a responsibility . Some students in the Rutgers dorm were amused by Ravi 's spycam-Twitter scheme . Others ignored it . They should have been outraged , and they should have done something about it . `` If you see something , say something '' is not an admonition restricted to the security realm . Tools are online for each of us to flag and report content that is objectionable . Many online companies have staffs to review such reports and to take action , from removing the offensive content to ejecting the person who posted it . Each of us should take responsibility to combat hate-filled content . Speak up : Clicking to report hate speech to an online host is not all we can do . Justice Louis Brandeis , in a 1927 Supreme Court case , extolled the virtues of `` counter-speech '' to address objectionable speech . That pre-Internet admonition applies full force to online messages today . Hate speech legitimizes discrimination , and many of the people who post it believe no one objects . So object . Speak up to counter the lies of hate speech or the inappropriate online conduct directed at minorities . Just as the Internet provides thoughtless haters with broadcasting tools , each of us has those same tools at our disposal . A little counter-speech can go a long way . It 's time to get serious about cyber-literacy and ethics . The lack of education in schools about the rules that apply to online posting is appalling . Kids are left to their own devices , literally , with little guidance . Given the power in everyone 's hands to cause injury -- and to be injured -- schools should provide serious discussions of what is appropriate online behavior . We are well past the time when adults can think of themselves as the digital immigrants who do n't fully understand new technologies , compared with their kids , the digital natives who better understand the online world . Privacy is a shared responsibility . Discussions about privacy usually revolve around consumer privacy and protection . But in this era of social media , when everyone can be a publisher and broadcaster , individual responsibility to respect privacy should be the focus . Most people would know that secretly setting up a webcam to spy on someone is wrong . But posting embarrassing photos and videos and making thoughtless comments can be a wrongful invasion of privacy as well . Each of us has a responsibility to consider the privacy implications of what we do online . Homophobia is not funny . Finally , while young straight people today are much more accepting of gay people , an undercurrent of homophobia remains . Ravi most likely would not have set up a webcam to catch his roommate making out with a girl , nor would he have tweeted about it . In some quarters , the put-down `` That 's so gay '' is still common parlance . Many think of gays and lesbians as `` the other '' and fair game for jokes . Racist and anti-Semitic jokes still have currency . Ravi may have thought what he was doing to his roommate was funny , but he now knows it was anything but , for Clementi and for himself . The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Christopher Wolf .
Rutgers tragedy after webcam intrusion : One person convicted , another dead . Christopher Wolf : Respecting others ' privacy online , fighting hate speech our responsibility . Wolf writes : Our online behavior can hurt ourselves and others , and it can even lead to suicide . We must speak up against hate speech , he says , and educate kids in wise behavior .