wɜːɹ ɪt nˌɑːt fɚðə lˈʊɹɹɪd, stˈɑːɹkli flˈæpɪŋ wˈɪndʌp, ðɪs wʊd biː ɹˌɛkəmˈɛndᵻd ɪn tˈoʊɾoʊ æz ɐ ɡɹˈɪpɪŋ, kwˈaɪətli ɪmˈædʒɪnətˌɪv hˈɛɹkˈɜːlɚ.
Were it not for the lurid, starkly flapping windup, this would be recommended in toto as a gripping, quietly imaginative hair-curler.