mˈiːnwaɪl, ðɪ ˌaɪˌɑːɹɹˈeɪ mˈæn hˌuː lˈɔst ðə wˈɪɡ tɹˈæks kˈoʊm dˌaʊn ænd dᵻmˈændz kˈoʊm sˈɛl hˌɪm hɪz hˈoʊl ˈɪnvəntˌoːɹi bɪkˈʌz nˈaʊ ˈɛvɹi bˈɔːld kˈæθlɪk ɪn nˈɔːɹðɚn ˈaɪɚlənd ɪz ɐ pətˈɛnʃəl sˈʌspɛkt fɚðə pəlˈiːs.
Meanwhile, the IRA man who lost the wig tracks Colm down and demands Colm sell him his whole inventory because now every bald Catholic in Northern Ireland is a potential suspect for the police.