&gt; I did, both times, and felt a little slighted that she wouldn’t even try it at the very least.

You really really need to rid yourself of this mentality. I'm a kosher keeping Jew whose been in many situations like this and what you need to understand is that it's not at all personal. 

It's not a question of her 'at least trying it,' she's not going to taste it and think "oh, this tastes kosher enough." It's a binary, either it's kosher enough (at whatever her level of observance is) for her to put in her mouth or it's not. And that has nothing to do with how good or bad she thinks it will taste, or what she thinks of you as a cook.

It's really admirable that you tried to cook something kosher, but no offence it sounds like you totally failed, even for someone who keeps really lax kashrut standards. (At a bare minimum, she probably doesn't eat any non-kosher meat, and yes, a non-kosher chicken is as not kosher as pork. by asking for pareve, what they probably meant from you was vegetarian. it's admittedly very stupid of them to expect you to know what Pareve means.)

That's all totally fine, Kashrut is really really complicated if you didn't grow up with it or put in a ton of study to take it on. But it also sounds like Sarah did the best thing she could in the situation which is just be polite and not make a big deal over it. 

But, I think you have no right to be this mad at her for just quietly not eating until you actually talk to her about what she needs.