(CNN) -- Americans snicker over the sordid details of Rep. Anthony Weiner's Internet escapades. But they pity his wife, Huma Abedin. They see an accomplished and beautiful woman betrayed by her husband's Twitter posts. And she's pregnant? The details just get worse and worse. 

Abedin and other political wives before her have been forced to face the public flogging of their husbands, heightened in this case by the technological evidence that Weiner left behind and by the helpful testimony of his correspondents. 

Americans love to debate the role of the wronged political wife. What will Hillary Clinton, Jenny Sanford, or Newt Gingrich's wives (pick one) do? What should they do? Actress Julianna Margulies was nominated for an Emmy for her portrayal of "The Good Wife" on CBS. Will she ever leave her fictional cheating husband? 

To which author Laura Munson says, "Stop." Stop calling these women victims. Unless there are threats to her physical safety or financial security, only Abedin decides if she is a victim. (And she's not talking publicly.) 

When her own husband, suffering through a midlife crisis, threatened to break up their marriage to end his pain, Munson chose not to play the victim. Instead she planned a summer of joy for herself and her two kids -- and her husband when he wanted to join them. She gave him six months to work through his crisis. 

How did she stop herself from pleading with him or simply dumping him just to get it over with? How did she choose a third way? 
And one more?
Newt Gingrich's wives