It is natural that Mr. Grandcourt should wish me to live in a good style of house in your neighborhood, and I cannot decline.

It is natural that Mr. Grandcourt should wish me to live in a good style of house, and I cannot decline.


"No; he wished me to hear it from you, I suppose."


Gwendolen in fact had been very anxious to have some definite knowledge of what would be done for her mother, but at no moment since her marriage had she been able to overcome the difficulty of mentioning the subject to Grandcourt.

Gwendolen in fact had been very anxious to have some definite knowledge of what would be done for her mother, but had not been able to overcome the difficulty of mentioning the subject to Grandcourt.


Now, however, she had a sense of obligation which would not let her rest without saying to him, "It is very good of you to provide for mamma.

Now, however, she had a sense of obligation which made her say to him, "It is very good of you to provide for mamma."


You took a great deal on yourself in marrying a girl who had nothing but relations belonging to her."


Grandcourt was smoking, and only said carelessly, "Of course I was not going to let her live like a gamekeeper's mother."

Grandcourt only said carelessly, "Of course I was not going to let her live like a gamekeeper's mother."


"At least he is not mean about money," thought Gwendolen, "and mamma is the better off for my marriage."


She often pursued the comparison between what might have been, if she had not married Grandcourt, and what actually was, trying to persuade herself that life generally was barren of satisfaction, and that if she had chosen differently she might now have been looking back with a regret as bitter as the feeling she was trying to argue away.

She often pursued the comparison between what might have been, if she had not married Grandcourt, and what actually was, trying to persuade herself that life generally was barren of satisfaction, and that if she had chosen differently she might now be feeling a regret as bitter as her current misery.


Her mother's dullness, which used to irritate her, she was at present inclined to explain as the ordinary result of woman's experience.


True, she still saw that she would "manage differently from mamma;" but her management now only meant that she would carry her troubles with spirit, and let none suspect them.

She still thought that she would "manage differently from mamma;" but her management now only meant that she would let none suspect her troubles.


By and by she promised herself that she should get used to her heart-sores, and find excitements that would carry her through life, as a hard gallop carried her through some of the morning hours.

She promised herself that she should get used to her heart-sores, and find excitements that would carry her through life, as a hard gallop carried her through the morning hours.


There was gambling: she had heard stories at Leubronn of fashionable women who gambled in all sorts of ways.

There was gambling: she had heard stories at Leubronn of fashionable women who gambled.


It seemed very flat to her at this distance, but perhaps if she began to gamble again, the passion might awake.


Then there was the pleasure of producing an effect by her appearance in society: what did celebrated beauties do in town when their husbands could afford display?

Then there was the pleasure of producing an effect by her appearance in society, and winning men's admiration, as celebrated beauties did


All men were fascinated by them: they had a perfect equipage and toilet, walked into public places, and bowed, and made the usual answers, and walked out again, perhaps they bought china, and practiced accomplishments.

: they had perfect outfits, walked into public places, bowed, made the usual answers, and walked out again; and perhaps they bought china, and practiced accomplishments.


If she could only feel a keen appetite for those pleasures--could only believe in pleasure as she used to do!

If she could only believe in pleasure as she used to do!


Accomplishments had ceased to have the exciting quality of promising any pre-eminence to her; and as for fascinated gentlemen--adorers who might hover round her with languishment, and diversify married life with the romantic stir of mystery, passion, and danger, which her French reading had given her some girlish notion of--they presented themselves to her imagination with the fatal circumstance that, instead of fascinating her in return, they were clad in her own weariness and disgust.

Accomplishments had ceased to have the exciting quality of promising her pre-eminence; and as for admirers, she imagined them with weariness and disgust.


The admiring male, rashly adjusting the expression of his features and the turn of his conversation to her supposed tastes, had always been an absurd object to her, and at present seemed rather detestable.


Many courses are actually pursued--follies and sins both convenient and inconvenient--without pleasure or hope of pleasure; but to solace ourselves with imagining any course beforehand, there must be some foretaste of pleasure in the shape of appetite; and Gwendolen's appetite had sickened.

Gwendolen's appetite for such delights had sickened.


Let her wander over the possibilities of her life as she would, an uncertain shadow dogged her.

Wherever she wandered over the possibilities of her life, a shadow dogged her.


Her confidence in herself and her destiny had turned into remorse and dread; she trusted neither herself nor her future.


This hidden helplessness gave fresh force to the hold Deronda had from the first taken on her mind, as one who had an unknown standard by which he judged her.

This hidden helplessness gave fresh force to the hold Deronda had taken on her mind, as one who judged her by an unknown standard.


Had he some way of looking at things which might be a new footing for her--an inward safeguard against possible events which she dreaded as stored-up retribution?

Had he some way of looking at things which might be a new inward safeguard for her against the retribution which she dreaded?


It is one of the secrets in that change of mental poise which has been fitly named conversion, that to many among us neither heaven nor earth has any revelation till some personality touches theirs with a peculiar influence, subduing them into receptiveness.


It had been Gwendolen's habit to think of the persons around her as stale books, too familiar to be interesting.


Deronda had lit up her attention with a sense of novelty: not by words only, but by imagined facts, his influence had entered into the current of that self-suspicion and self-blame which awakens a new consciousness.

Deronda had lit up her attention with a sense of novelty: his influence had entered into the current of that self-suspicion and self-blame which awakens a new consciousness.


"I wish he could know everything about me without my telling him," was one of her thoughts, as she sat leaning over the end of a couch, supporting her head with her hand, and looking at herself in a mirror--not in admiration, but in a sad kind of companionship.

"I wish he could know everything about me without my telling him," she thought, as she sat on a couch, supporting her head with her hand, and looking at herself in a mirror - not in admiration, but in a sad companionship.


"I wish he knew that I am not so contemptible as he thinks me; that I am in deep trouble, and want to be something better if I could."

"I wish he knew that I am not so contemptible as he thinks me; that I am in deep trouble, and want to be something better."


Without the aid of sacred ceremony or costume, her feelings had turned this man, only a few years older than herself, into a priest; a sort of trust less rare than the fidelity that guards it.

Without the aid of sacred ceremony or costume, her feelings had turned this man, only a few years older than herself, into a priest.


Young reverence for one who is also young is the most coercive of all: there is the same level of temptation, and the higher motive is believed in as a fuller force--not suspected to be a mere residue from weary experience.

Young reverence for one who is also young is the strongest of all.


But the coercion is often stronger on the one who takes the reverence.

But the effect is also stronger on the one who takes the reverence.


And perhaps in that ideal consecration of Gwendolen's, some education was being prepared for Deronda.

And perhaps in that consecration of Gwendolen's, some education was being prepared for Deronda.


Among the heirs of Art, as is the division of the promised land, each has to win his portion by hard fighting: the bestowal is after the manner of prophecy, and is a title without possession.


To carry the map of an ungotten estate in your pocket is a poor sort of copyhold.


And in fancy to cast his shoe over Eden is little warrant that a man shall ever set the sole of his foot on an acre of his own there.


The most obstinate beliefs that mortals entertain about themselves are such as they have no evidence for beyond a constant, spontaneous pulsing of their self-satisfaction--as it were a hidden seed of madness, a confidence that they can move the world without precise notion of standing-place or lever.


"Pray go to church, mamma," said Gwendolen the next morning.


(He had written in reply to her note that he would be with her at eleven.)


"That is hardly correct, I think," said Mrs. Davilow, anxiously.

"That is hardly correct, I think," said Mrs. Davilow anxiously.


"Our affairs are too serious for us to think of such nonsensical rules," said Gwendolen, contemptuously.


"They are insulting as well as ridiculous."


"You would not mind Isabel sitting with you?


"No; she could not: she would bite her nails and stare.


Trust my judgment, mamma, I must be alone.

Trust my judgment, mamma; I must be alone.


Gwendolen had her way, of course; only that Miss Merry and two of the girls stayed at home, to give the house a look of habitation by sitting at the dining-room windows.

Gwendolen had her way, of course; only Miss Merry and two of the girls stayed at home, to give the house a look of habitation by sitting at the dining-room windows.


The melancholy waning sunshine of autumn rested on the half-strown grass and came mildly through the windows in slanting bands of brightness over the old furniture, and the glass panel that reflected the furniture; over the tapestried chairs with their faded flower-wreaths, the dark enigmatic pictures, the superannuated organ at which Gwendolen had pleased herself with acting Saint Cecelia on her first joyous arrival, the crowd of pallid, dusty knickknacks seen through the open doors of the antechamber where she had achieved the wearing of her Greek dress as Hermione.

The melancholy waning sunshine of autumn came mildly through the windows in slanting bands of brightness over the old furniture, the organ at which Gwendolen had acted Saint Cecilia, the antechamber where she worn her Greek dress as Hermione.


This last memory was just now very busy in her; for had not Klesmer then been struck with admiration of her pose and expression?

This last memory was just now very busy in her; for had not Klesmer been struck with admiration of her pose and expression?


Whatever he had said, whatever she imagined him to have thought, was at this moment pointed with keenest interest for her: perhaps she had never before in her life felt so inwardly dependent, so consciously in need of another person's opinion.

His reaction was at this moment of the keenest interest for her: perhaps she had never before in her life felt so in need of another person's opinion.


There was a new fluttering of spirit within her, a new element of deliberation in her self-estimate which had hitherto been a blissful gift of intuition.


Still it was the recurrent burden of her inward soliloquy that Klesmer had seen but little of her, and any unfavorable conclusion of his must have too narrow a foundation.

Still she told herself that Klesmer had seen little of her, and any unfavourable conclusion of his must have too narrow a foundation.


She really felt clever enough for anything.


To fill up the time she collected her volumes and pieces of music, and laying them on the top of the piano, set herself to classify them.


Then catching the reflection of her movements in the glass panel, she was diverted to the contemplation of the image there and walked toward it.


Dressed in black, without a single ornament, and with the warm whiteness of her skin set off between her light-brown coronet of hair and her square-cut bodice, she might have tempted an artist to try again the Roman trick of a statue in black, white, and tawny marble.


Seeing her image slowly advancing, she thought "I _am_ beautiful"--not exultingly, but with grave decision.


Being beautiful was after all the condition on which she most needed external testimony.


If any one objected to the turn of her nose or the form of her neck and chin, she had not the sense that she could presently show her power of attainment in these branches of feminine perfection.


There was not much time to fill up in this way before the sound of wheels, the loud ring, and the opening doors assured her that she was not by any accident to be disappointed.


This slightly increased her inward flutter.


In spite of her self-confidence, she dreaded Klesmer as part of that unmanageable world which was independent of her wishes--something vitriolic that would not cease to burn because you smiled or frowned at it.

In spite of her self-confidence, she dreaded Klesmer as part of that unmanageable world which was independent of her wishes.


she was at a higher crisis of her woman's fate than in her last experience with Grandcourt.


The questioning then, was whether she should take a particular man as a husband.


The inmost fold of her questioning now was whether she need take a husband at all--whether she could not achieve substantially for herself and know gratified ambition without bondage.


Klesmer made his most deferential bow in the wide doorway of the antechamber--showing also the deference of the finest gray kerseymere trousers and perfect gloves (the 'masters of those who know' are happily altogether human).


Gwendolen met him with unusual gravity, and holding out her hand said, "It is most kind of you to come, Herr Klesmer.

Gwendolen met him with unusual gravity, saying, "It is most kind of you to come, Herr Klesmer.


I hope you have not thought me presumptuous."


"I took your wish as a command that did me honor," said Klesmer, with answering gravity.

"I took your wish as a command that did me honour," said Klesmer, with answering gravity.


He was really putting by his own affairs in order to give his utmost attention to what Gwendolen might have to say; but his temperament was still in a state of excitation from the events of yesterday, likely enough to give his expressions a more than usually biting edge.

He was really putting aside his own affairs to give his utmost attention to Gwendolen; but he was still in a state of excitation from the events of yesterday.


Gwendolen for once was under too great a strain of feeling to remember formalities.

Gwendolen was under too great a strain to remember formalities.


She continued standing near the piano, and Klesmer took his stand near the other end of it with his back to the light and his terribly omniscient eyes upon her.


No affectation was of use, and she began without delay.


We have lost all our fortune; we have nothing.


I must get my own bread, and I desire to provide for my mamma, so as to save her from any hardship.

I must get my own bread, and I desire to provide for my mamma.


The only way I can think of--and I should like it better than anything--is to be an actress--to go on the stage.

The only way I can think of - and I should like it better than anything - is to be an actress on the stage.


But, of course, I should like to take a high position, and I thought--if you thought I could"--here Gwendolen became a little more nervous--"it would be better for me to be a singer--to study singing also."

But, of course, I should like to take a high position, and I thought - if you thought I could" - here Gwendolen became a little more nervous- "it would be better for me to study singing also."


Klesmer put down his hat upon the piano, and folded his arms as if to concentrate himself.


"I know," Gwendolen resumed, turning from pale to pink and back again--"I know that my method of singing is very defective; but I have been ill taught.

"I know," Gwendolen resumed, turning from pale to pink, "I know that my singing is very defective; but I have been ill taught.


I could be better taught; I could study.


And you will understand my wish:--to sing and act too, like Grisi, is a much higher position.

And you will understand my wish: to sing and act too, is a much higher position.


Naturally, I should wish to take as high rank as I can.


Gwendolen somehow had the conviction that now she made this serious appeal the truth would be favorable.

Gwendolen somehow had the conviction that now she had made this serious appeal the truth would be favourable.


He drew off his gloves quickly, tossed them into his hat, rested his hands on his hips, and walked to the other end of the room.

He drew off his gloves, tossed them into his hat, and walked to the other end of the room,


He was filled with compassion for this girl: he wanted to put a guard on his speech.

filled with compassion for this girl: he wanted to guard his speech.


When he turned again, he looked at her with a mild frown of inquiry, and said with gentle though quick utterance, "You have never seen anything, I think, of artists and their lives?--I mean of musicians, actors, artists of that kind?"

When he turned again, he looked at her with a mild frown of inquiry, and said gently, "You have never seen anything, I think, of actors and their lives?"


"Oh, no," said Gwendolen, not perturbed by a reference to this obvious fact in the history of a young lady hitherto well provided for.


"You are--pardon me," said Klesmer, again pausing near the piano--"in coming to a conclusion on such a matter as this, everything must be taken into consideration--you are perhaps twenty?"

"You are - pardon me," said Klesmer, "but you are perhaps twenty?"


"I am twenty-one," said Gwendolen, a slight fear rising in her.


Klesmer pouted his under lip and shook his long fingers upward in a manner totally enigmatic.


"Many persons begin later than others," said Gwendolen, betrayed by her habitual consciousness of having valuable information to bestow.


Klesmer took no notice, but said with more studied gentleness than ever, "You have probably not thought of an artistic career until now: you did not entertain the notion, the longing--what shall I say?--you did not wish yourself an actress, or anything of that sort, till the present trouble?"

Klesmer said with more studied gentleness than ever, "You have probably not thought of an artistic career until now: you did not wish yourself an actress, till the present trouble?"


I have acted; you saw me, if you remember--you saw me here in charades, and as Hermione," said Gwendolen, really fearing that Klesmer had forgotten.

You saw me, if you remember, in charades, and as Hermione," said Gwendolen, really fearing that Klesmer had forgotten.


"Yes, yes," he answered quickly, "I remember--I remember perfectly," and again walked to the other end of the room.

"Yes, yes," he answered quickly, "I remember perfectly," and again walked to the other end of the room.


It was difficult for him to refrain from this kind of movement when he was in any argument either audible or silent.


Gwendolen felt that she was being weighed.


But she did not yet conceive that the scale could dip on the wrong side, and it seemed to her only graceful to say, "I shall be very much obliged to you for taking the trouble to give me your advice, whatever it maybe."

But she did not yet conceive that the scale could dip on the wrong side, when she said, "I shall be very much obliged to you for your advice, whatever it may be."


"Miss Harleth," said Klesmer, turning toward her and speaking with a slight increase of accent, "I will veil nothing from you in this matter.

"Miss Harleth," said Klesmer with a slight increase of accent, "I will veil nothing from you in this matter.


I should reckon myself guilty if I put a false visage on things--made them too black or too white.

I should reckon myself guilty if I put you on


The gods have a curse for him who willingly tells another the wrong road.


And if I misled one who is so young, so beautiful--who, I trust, will find her happiness along the right road, I should regard myself as a--_Bsewicht_."

And if I misled one who is so young, so beautiful - who, I trust, will find her happiness along the right road, I should regard myself as a villain."


In the last word Klesmer's voice had dropped to a loud whisper.


Gwendolen felt a sinking of heart under this unexpected solemnity, and kept a sort of fascinated gaze on Klesmer's face, as he went on.

Gwendolen felt a sinking of heart under this unexpected solemnity as he went on.


"You are a beautiful young lady--you have been brought up in ease--you have done what you would--you have not said to yourself, 'I must know this exactly,' 'I must understand this exactly,' 'I must do this exactly,'"--in uttering these three terrible _musts_, Klesmer lifted up three long fingers in succession.

"You are a beautiful young lady - you have been brought up in ease.


"In sum, you have not been called upon to be anything but a charming young lady, whom it is an impoliteness to find fault with."

You have not been called upon to be anything but a charming young lady, whom it is impolite to find fault with."


He paused an instant; then resting his fingers on his hips again, and thrusting out his powerful chin, he said,

He paused; then thrusting out his powerful chin, he said,


"Well, then, with that preparation, you wish to try the life of an artist; you wish to try a life of arduous, unceasing work, and--uncertain praise.

"With that preparation, you wish to try the life of an artist; a life of arduous, unceasing work, and uncertain praise.


Your praise would have to be earned, like your bread; and both would come slowly, scantily--what do I say?--they may hardly come at all."

Your praise would have to be earned, like your bread; and both would come slowly, scantily. They may hardly come at all."


This tone of discouragement, which Klesmer had hoped might suffice without anything more unpleasant, roused some resistance in Gwendolen.

This discouragement, which Klesmer had hoped might suffice without anything more unpleasant, roused some resistance in Gwendolen.


With a slight turn of her head away from him, and an air of pique, she said,


"I thought that you, being an artist, would consider the life one of the most honorable and delightful.

"I thought that you, being an artist, would consider the life one of the most honourable and delightful.


And if I can do nothing better?--I suppose I can put up with the same risks as other people do."

And if I can do nothing better, I suppose I can put up with the same risks as other people."


"No, my dear Miss Harleth, you could do nothing better--neither man nor woman could do anything better--if you could do what was best or good of its kind.

"No, my dear Miss Harleth, you could do nothing better.


I am not decrying the life of the true artist.

I am not decrying the life of the artist.


I say, it is out of the reach of any but choice organizations--natures framed to love perfection and to labor for it; ready, like all true lovers, to endure, to wait, to say, I am not yet worthy, but she--Art, my mistress--is worthy, and I will live to merit her.


But the honor comes from the inward vocation and the hard-won achievement: there is no honor in donning the life as a livery."

But the honour comes from the inward vocation and the hard-won achievement: there is no honour in donning the life as a livery."


Some excitement of yesterday had revived in Klesmer and hurried him into speech a little aloof from his immediate friendly purpose.

Some excitement of yesterday had revived in Klesmer and hurried him into sterner speech than he had intended.


He had wished as delicately as possible to rouse in Gwendolen a sense of her unfitness for a perilous, difficult course; but it was his wont to be angry with the pretensions of incompetence, and he was in danger of getting chafed.


But Gwendolen's chief impression was that he had not yet denied her the power of doing what would be good of its kind.

But Gwendolen's impression was that he had not yet denied that she could succeed.


Klesmer's fervor seemed to be a sort of glamor such as he was prone to throw over things in general; and what she desired to assure him of was that she was not afraid of some preliminary hardships.

Klesmer was prone to fervour; and she wished to assure him that she was not afraid of some preliminary hardships.


The belief that to present herself in public on the stage must produce an effect such as she had been used to feel certain of in private life, was like a bit of her flesh--it was not to be peeled off readily, but must come with blood and pain.

She believed that on the stage she must produce an effect such as she had been used to feel certain of in private life: and the belief would not be peeled off easily, but with blood and pain.


"I am quite prepared to bear hardships at first.


Of course no one can become celebrated all at once.

Of course no one can become famous all at once.


And it is not necessary that every one should be first-rate--either actresses or singers.

And it is not necessary that every actress or singer should be first-rate.


If you would be so kind as to tell me what steps I should take, I shall have the courage to take them.

If you would be so kind as to tell me what steps you would recommend, I shall have the courage to take them."


It will be easier than the dead level of being a governess.


Klesmer was convinced now that he must speak plainly.


"I will tell you the steps, not that I recommend, but that will be forced upon you.

"I will tell you the steps that will be forced upon you.


It is all one, so far, what your goal will be--excellence, celebrity, second, third rateness--it is all one.


You must go to town under the protection of your mother.


You must put yourself under training--musical, dramatic, theatrical:--whatever you desire to do you have to learn"--here Gwendolen looked as if she were going to speak, but Klesmer lifted up his hand and said, decisively, "I know.

You must put yourself under training - musical, dramatic, theatrical"- here Gwendolen looked as if she were going to speak, but Klesmer lifted up his hand and said, decisively, "I know.


You have exercised your talents--you recite--you sing--from the drawing-room _Standpunkt_.

You recite and sing for the drawing-room.


My dear Frulein, you must unlearn all that.


You have not yet conceived what excellence is: you must unlearn your mistaken admirations.

You have not yet conceived what excellence is: you must unlearn your mistakes.


You must know what you have to strive for, and then you must subdue your mind and body to unbroken discipline.

You must know what you have to strive for, and then subdue your mind and body to unbroken discipline.


For you must not be thinking of celebrity: put that candle out of your eyes, and look only at excellence.


You would of course earn nothing--you could get no engagement for a long while.

You would of course earn nothing - you could get no engagement for a long while.


You would need money for yourself and your family.


But that," here Klesmer frowned and shook his fingers as if to dismiss a triviality, "that could perhaps be found."


Gwendolen turned pink and pale during this speech.

Gwendolen turned pink and then pale during this speech.


Her pride had felt a terrible knife-edge, and the last sentence only made the smart keener.

Her pride had felt a terrible knife-edge.


She was conscious of appearing moved, and tried to escape from her weakness by suddenly walking to a seat and pointing out a chair to Klesmer.


He did not take it, but turned a little in order to face her and leaned against the piano.


At that moment she wished that she had not sent for him: this first experience of being taken on some other ground than that of her social rank and her beauty was becoming bitter to her.

She wished that she had not sent for him: this first experience of being taken on some other ground than that of her social rank and her beauty was becoming bitter.


Klesmer, preoccupied with a serious purpose, went on without change of tone.


"Now, what sort of issue might be fairly expected from all this self-denial?

"Now, what sort of result might be fairly expected from this self-denial?


It is right that your eyes should be open to it.


This issue would be uncertain, and, most probably, would not be worth much."

The result would be uncertain, and probably would not be worth much."


At these relentless words Klesmer put out his lip and looked through his spectacles with the air of a monster impenetrable by beauty.


Gwendolen's eyes began to burn, but the dread of showing weakness urged her to added self-control.

Gwendolen's eyes began to burn, but the dread of showing weakness urged her to self-control.


She compelled herself to say, in a hard tone,


"You think I want talent, or am too old to begin."


Klesmer made a sort of hum, and then descended on an emphatic "Yes!


The desire and the training should have begun seven years ago--or a good deal earlier.

The desire and the training should have begun seven years ago, or earlier.


A mountebank's child who helps her father to earn shillings when she is six years old--a child that inherits a singing throat from a long line of choristers and learns to sing as it learns to talk, has a likelier beginning.

A mountebank's child who helps her father to earn shillings when she is six - a child that learns to sing as it learns to talk, has a likelier beginning.


Any great achievement in acting or in music grows with the growth.


Whenever an artist has been able to say, 'I came, I saw, I conquered,' it has been at the end of patient practice.


Genius at first is little more than a great capacity for receiving discipline.

Genius at first is little more than a great capacity for receiving discipline, and patient practice.


Singing and acting, like the fine dexterity of the juggler with his cups and balls, require a shaping of the organs toward a finer and finer certainty of effect.

Singing and acting require a shaping of the organs toward a finer certainty of effect.


Your muscles--your whole frame--must go like a watch, true, true to a hair.

Your muscles - your whole frame - must go like a watch, true to a hair.


That is the work of spring-time, before habits have been determined."


"I did not pretend to genius," said Gwendolen, still feeling that she might somehow do what Klesmer wanted to represent as impossible.

"I did not pretend to genius," said Gwendolen, still feeling that she might somehow do what he said was impossible.


"I only suppose that I might have a little talent--enough to improve."

"I only suppose that I might have a little talent - enough to improve."


"If you had been put in the right track some years ago and had worked well you might now have made a public singer, though I don't think your voice would have counted for much in public.

"If you had been put in the right track some years ago and had worked well, you might now have made a public singer, though I don't think your voice would have counted for much.


For the stage your personal charms and intelligence might then have told without the present drawback of inexperience--lack of discipline--lack of instruction."

For the stage your personal charms and intelligence might then have told."


Certainly Klesmer seemed cruel, but his feeling was the reverse of cruel.


Our speech, even when we are most single-minded, can never take its line absolutely from one impulse; but Klesmer's was, as far as possible, directed by compassion for poor Gwendolen's ignorant eagerness to enter on a course of which he saw all the miserable details with a definiteness which he could not if he would have conveyed to her mind.

He was directed by compassion for poor Gwendolen, so ignorantly eager to enter on a course of which he saw all the miserable details.


Her self-opinion rallied, and since the counselor whom she had called in gave a decision of such severe peremptoriness, she was tempted to think that his judgment was not only fallible but biased.

Her self-opinion rallied, and since her counsellor was so severe, she was tempted to think that his judgment was fallible and biased.


It occurred to her that a simpler and wiser step for her to have taken would have been to send a letter through the post to the manager of a London theatre, asking him to make an appointment.

It occurred to her that it would have been simpler and wiser for her to have written to the manager of a London theatre, asking to make an appointment.


She would make no further reference to her singing; Klesmer, she saw, had set himself against her singing.


But she felt equal to arguing with him about her going on the stage, and she answered in a resistant tone,

But she felt equal to arguing about her acting, and she answered in a resistant tone-


"I understood, of course, that no one can be a finished actress at once.


It may be impossible to tell beforehand whether I should succeed; but that seems to me a reason why I should try.

It may be impossible to tell beforehand whether I should succeed; but I could try.


I should have thought that I might have taken an engagement at a theatre meanwhile, so as to earn money and study at the same time."

I could take an engagement at a theatre meanwhile, so as to earn money and study at the same time."


"Can't be done, my dear Miss Harleth--I speak plainly--it can't be done.


I must clear your mind of these notions which have no more resemblance to reality than a pantomime.


Ladies and gentlemen think that when they have made their toilet and drawn on their gloves they are as presentable on the stage as in a drawing-room.


With all your grace and charm, if you were to present yourself as an aspirant to the stage, a manager would either require you to pay as an amateur for being allowed to perform or he would tell you to go and be taught--trained to bear yourself on the stage, as a horse, however beautiful, must be trained for the circus; to say nothing of that study which would enable you to personate a character consistently, and animate it with the natural language of face, gesture, and tone.

With all your grace and charm, if you were to present yourself as an aspirant to the stage, a manager would either require you to pay as an amateur for being allowed to perform, or he would tell you to go and be taught. An actor must study to personate a character consistently, and animate it with the natural language of face, gesture, and tone.


For you to get an engagement fit for you straight away is out of the question."


"I really cannot understand that," said Gwendolen, rather haughtily--then, checking herself, she added in another tone--"I shall be obliged to you if you will explain how it is that such poor actresses get engaged.

"I really cannot understand that," said Gwendolen, rather haughtily. "How is it that such poor actresses get engaged?


I have been to the theatre several times, and I am sure there were actresses who seemed to me to act not at all well and who were quite plain."


"Ah, my dear Miss Harleth, that is the easy criticism of the buyer.


We who buy slippers toss away this pair and the other as clumsy; but there went an apprenticeship to the making of them.


Excuse me; you could not at present teach one of those actresses; but there is certainly much that she could teach you.

excuse me; you could not at present teach one of those actresses; but there is certainly much that she could teach you.


For example, she can pitch her voice so as to be heard: ten to one you could not do it till after many trials.

Ten to one you could not pitch your voice so as to be heard:


Merely to stand and move on the stage is an art--requires practice.

and merely to stand and move on the stage requires practice."


It is understood that we are not now talking of a _comparse_ in a petty theatre who earns the wages of a needle-woman.


"Of course I must earn more than that," said Gwendolen, with a sense of wincing rather than of being refuted, "but I think I could soon learn to do tolerably well all those little things you have mentioned.

"I think I could soon learn to do it tolerably well.


And even in Paris, I am sure, I saw two actresses playing important ladies' parts who were not at all ladies and quite ugly.

And even in Paris, I saw two actresses playing important ladies' parts who were not at all ladies and quite ugly.


I suppose I have no particular talent, but I _must_ think it is an advantage, even on the stage, to be a lady and not a perfect fright."

I suppose I have no particular talent, but I must think it is an advantage, even on the stage, to be a lady and not a perfect fright."


"Ah, let us understand each other," said Klesmer, with a flash of new meaning.


"I was speaking of what you would have to go through if you aimed at becoming a real artist--if you took music and the drama as a higher vocation in which you would strive after excellence.

"I was speaking of what you would have to go through if you aimed at becoming a real artist and striving after excellence.


On that head, what I have said stands fast.


You would find--after your education in doing things slackly for one-and-twenty years--great difficulties in study; you would find mortifications in the treatment you would get when you presented yourself on the footing of skill.


You would be subjected to tests; people would no longer feign not to see your blunders.

: you would be subjected to tests, and judged without flattery.


You would at first only be accepted on trial.


You would have to bear what I may call a glaring insignificance: any success must be won by the utmost patience.

You would have to bear insignificance: any success must be won by the utmost patience.


You would have to keep your place in a crowd, and after all it is likely you would lose it and get out of sight.


If you determine to face these hardships and still try, you will have the dignity of a high purpose, even though you may have chosen unfortunately.

If you determine to face these hardships, you will have the dignity of a high purpose, even though you may have chosen unfortunately.


You will have some merit, though you may win no prize.


You have asked my judgment on your chances of winning.


I don't pretend to speak absolutely; but measuring probabilities, my judgment is:--you will hardly achieve more than mediocrity."

I don't pretend to speak absolutely; but measuring probabilities, my judgment is that you will hardly achieve more than mediocrity."


Klesmer had delivered himself with emphatic rapidity, and now paused a moment.


Gwendolen was motionless, looking at her hands, which lay over each other on her lap, till the deep-toned, long-drawn "_But_," with which he resumed, had a startling effect, and made her look at him again.

Gwendolen was motionless, looking at her hands.


"But--there are certainly other ideas, other dispositions with which a young lady may take up an art that will bring her before the public.

"But"- he resumed- "there are certainly other ideas with which a young lady may take up an art that will bring her before the public.


She may rely on the unquestioned power of her beauty as a passport.


She may desire to exhibit herself to an admiration which dispenses with skill.


This goes a certain way on the stage: not in music: but on the stage, beauty is taken when there is nothing more commanding to be had.


Not without some drilling, however: as I have said before, technicalities have in any case to be mastered.

Not without some drilling, however: as I have said, technicalities have to be mastered.


But these excepted, we have here nothing to do with art.


The woman who takes up this career is not an artist: she is usually one who thinks of entering on a luxurious life by a short and easy road--perhaps by marriage--that is her most brilliant chance, and the rarest.

But the woman who takes up this career is not an artist: she usually thinks of entering a luxurious life by a short and easy road - perhaps by marriage.


Still, her career will not be luxurious to begin with: she can hardly earn her own poor bread independently at once, and the indignities she will be liable to are such as I will not speak of."

Still, her career will not be luxurious to begin with: she can hardly earn her own bread at once, and the indignities she will be liable to are such as I will not speak of."


"I desire to be independent," said Gwendolen, deeply stung and confusedly apprehending some scorn for herself in Klesmer's words.


"That was my reason for asking whether I could not get an immediate engagement.


Of course I cannot know how things go on about theatres.

"Of course I cannot know how things go on in theatres.


But I thought that I could have made myself independent.


I have no money, and I will not accept help from any one."

I have no money, and I will not accept help from anyone."


Her wounded pride could not rest without making this disclaimer.


It was intolerable to her that Klesmer should imagine her to have expected other help from him than advice.


"That is a hard saying for your friends," said Klesmer, recovering the gentleness of tone with which he had begun the conversation.


"I have given you pain," said Klesmer gently.


I was bound to put the truth, the unvarnished truth, before you.

"But I was bound to put the unvarnished truth before you.


I have not said--I will not say--you will do wrong to choose the hard, climbing path of an endeavoring artist.

I will not say you will do wrong to choose the hard, climbing path of an artist.


You have to compare its difficulties with those of any less hazardous--any more private course which opens itself to you.


If you take that more courageous resolve I will ask leave to shake hands with you on the strength of our freemasonry, where we are all vowed to the service of art, and to serve her by helping every fellow-servant."

If you take that courageous resolve I will ask leave to shake hands with you on the strength of our freemasonry, where we are all vowed to the service of art."


Gwendolen was silent, again looking at her hands.


She felt herself very far away from taking the resolve that would enforce acceptance; and after waiting an instant or two, Klesmer went on with deepened seriousness.

She felt herself very far from taking the resolve; and after a moment, Klesmer went on with deepened seriousness.


"Where there is the duty of service there must be the duty of accepting it.


The question is not one of personal obligation.


And in relation to practical matters immediately affecting your future--excuse my permitting myself to mention in confidence an affair of my own.

"Excuse my mentioning in confidence an affair of my own.


I am expecting an event which would make it easy for me to exert myself on your behalf in furthering your opportunities of instruction and residence in London--under the care, that is, of your family--without need for anxiety on your part.

I am expecting an event which would make it easy for me to exert myself on your behalf, by arranging for your instruction and residence in London, under the care of your family.


If you resolve to take art as a bread-study, you need only undertake the study at first; the bread will be found without trouble.

If you resolve to study the art, you need only undertake the study at first; your bread will be found without trouble.


The event I mean is my marriage--in fact--you will receive this as a matter of confidence--my marriage with Miss Arrowpoint, which will more than double such right as I have to be trusted by you as a friend.

The event I mean is my marriage with Miss Arrowpoint.


Your friendship will have greatly risen in value for _her_ by your having adopted that generous labor."

Your friendship will have greatly risen in value for her by your having adopted that generous labour."


That Klesmer was about to marry Miss Arrowpoint caused her no surprise, and at another moment she would have amused herself in quickly imagining the scenes that must have occurred at Quetcham.

That Klesmer was about to marry Miss Arrowpoint caused her no surprise, and at another time she would have amused herself in imagining the scenes at Quetcham.


But what engrossed her feeling, what filled her imagination now, was the panorama of her own immediate future that Klesmer's words seemed to have unfolded.

But she saw only the picture of her own future that Klesmer's words unfolded.


The suggestion of Miss Arrowpoint as a patroness was only another detail added to its repulsiveness: Klesmer's proposal to help her seemed an additional irritation after the humiliating judgment he had passed on her capabilities.

The suggestion of Miss Arrowpoint as a patroness, and Klesmer's proposal to help her, were irritations after his humiliating judgment on her abilities.


His words had really bitten into her self-confidence and turned it into the pain of a bleeding wound; and the idea of presenting herself before other judges was now poisoned with the dread that they also might be harsh; they also would not recognize the talent she was conscious of.

His words had bitten into her self-confidence; and the idea of presenting herself before other judges was now poisoned with the dread that they also might be harsh, and fail to recognize her talent.


But she controlled herself, and rose from her seat before she made any answer.


It seemed natural that she should pause.


She went to the piano and looked absently at leaves of music, pinching up the corners.


At last she turned toward Klesmer and said, with almost her usual air of proud equality, which in this interview had not been hitherto perceptible.


"I congratulate you sincerely, Herr Klesmer.


I think I never saw any one so admirable as Miss Arrowpoint.

I never saw anyone so admirable as Miss Arrowpoint.


And I have to thank you for every sort of kindness this morning.

And I thank you for your kindness this morning.


If I make the resolve you have spoken of, I will use your permission--I will let you know.

If I make the resolve you have spoken of, I will let you know.


In any case, I am deeply obliged to you."


It was very bold of me to ask you to take this trouble."


Klesmer's inward remark was, "She will never let me know."


But with the most thorough respect in his manner, he said, "Command me at any time.

But with the utmost respect, he said, "Command me at any time.


There is an address on this card which will always find me with little delay."

The address on this card will always find me."


When he had taken up his hat and was going to make his bow, Gwendolen's better self, conscious of an ingratitude which the clear-seeing Klesmer must have penetrated, made a desperate effort to find its way above the stifling layers of egoistic disappointment and irritation.

He took up his hat.
Gwendolen's better self, conscious of ingratitude, made a desperate effort to rise above the stifling layers of egoistic disappointment.


Looking at him with a glance of the old gayety, she put out her hand, and said with a smile, "If I take the wrong road, it will not be because of your flattery."

She said with a smile, "If I take the wrong road, it will not be because of your flattery."


"God forbid that you should take any road but one where you will find and give happiness!"

"God forbid that you should take any road but one to happiness!"


Then, in foreign fashion, he touched her fingers lightly with his lips, and in another minute she heard the sound of his departing wheels getting more distant on the gravel.

Then he touched her fingers lightly with his lips, and left.


Gwendolen had never in her life felt so miserable.


No sob came, no passion of tears, to relieve her.


Her eyes were burning; and the noonday only brought into more dreary clearness the absence of interest from her life.

Her eyes were burning; and she saw with dreary clearness the absence of interest from her life.


All memories, all objects, the pieces of music displayed, the open piano--the very reflection of herself in the glass--seemed no better than the packed-up shows of a departing fair.

All memories, all objects, the pieces of music displayed, the piano, seemed no better than the packed-up shows of a departing fair.


For the first time since her consciousness began, she was having a vision of herself on the common level, and had lost the innate sense that there were reasons why she should not be slighted, elbowed, jostled--treated like a passenger with a third-class ticket, in spite of private objections on her own part.

For the first time she had lost the innate sense of her superiority.


She did not move about; the prospects begotten by disappointment were too oppressively preoccupying; she threw herself into the shadiest corner of a settee, and pressed her fingers over her burning eyelids.

She threw herself onto the settee, and pressed her fingers over her eyelids.


Every word that Klesmer had said seemed to have been branded into her memory, as most words are which bring with them a new set of impressions and make an epoch for us.

Every word of Klesmer's seemed branded into her memory.


Only a few hours before, the dawning smile of self-contentment rested on her lips as she vaguely imagined a future suited to her wishes: it seemed but the affair of a year or so for her to become the most approved Juliet of the time: or, if Klesmer encouraged her idea of being a singer, to proceed by more gradual steps to her place in the opera, while she won money and applause by occasional performances.

Only a few hours before, she had contentedly imagined a future suited to her wishes: in a year or so she would become the most approved Juliet of the time: or would proceed by gradual steps to her place in the opera, while she won money and applause by occasional performances.


At home, at school, among acquaintances, she had been used to have her conscious superiority admitted; and she had moved in a society where everything, from low arithmetic to high art, is of the amateur kind, politely supposed to fall short of perfection only because gentlemen and ladies are not obliged to do more than they like--otherwise they would probably give forth abler writings, and show themselves more commanding artists than any the world is at present obliged to put up with.

At home, at school, among acquaintances, she had been used to have her superiority admitted; and she had moved in a society where everything is of the amateur kind, only falling short of perfection because gentlemen and ladies are not obliged to do more than they like.


The self-confident visions that had beguiled her were not of a highly exceptional kind; and she had at least shown some rationality in consulting the person who knew the most and had flattered her the least.

She had at least shown some sense in consulting the person who knew the most and had flattered her the least.


In asking Klesmer's advice, however, she had rather been borne up by a belief in his latent admiration than bent on knowing anything more unfavorable that might have lain behind his slight objections to her singing; and the truth she had asked for, with an expectation that it would be agreeable, had come like a lacerating thong.

In asking Klesmer's advice, however, she had been borne up by a belief in his latent admiration rather than a wish to know anything more unfavourable than slight objections; and the truth she had asked for, expecting it to be agreeable, had come like a lacerating blow.


"Too old--should have begun seven years ago--you will not, at best, achieve more than mediocrity--hard, incessant work, uncertain praise--bread coming slowly, scantily, perhaps not at all--mortifications, people no longer feigning not to see your blunders--glaring insignificance"--all these phrases rankled in her; and even more galling was the hint that she could only be accepted on the stage as a beauty who hoped to get a husband.

"Too old - should have begun seven years ago - will not achieve more than mediocrity - incessant work, uncertain praise, little earnings - mortifications, insignificance" - these phrases rankled; and even more galling was the hint that she could only be accepted on the stage as a beauty hoping for a husband.


The "indignities" that she might be visited with had no very definite form for her, but the mere association of anything called "indignity" with herself, roused a resentful alarm.

The "indignities" that she might incur had no very definite form for her, but the mere word "indignity" roused a resentful alarm.


And along with the vaguer images which were raised by those biting words, came the precise conception of disagreeables which her experience enabled her to imagine.


How could she take her mamma and the four sisters to London?

And how could she take her mamma and four sisters to London


if it were not possible for her to earn money at once?

, if she were not earning money at once?


And as for submitting to be a _protg_, and asking her mamma to submit with her to the humiliation of being supported by Miss Arrowpoint--that was as bad as being a governess; nay, worse; for suppose the end of all her study to be as worthless as Klesmer clearly expected it to be, the sense of favors received and never repaid, would embitter the miseries of disappointment.

As for submitting to be the protg of Miss Arrowpoint, that was as bad as being a governess.


Klesmer doubtless had magnificent ideas about helping artists; but how could he know the feelings of ladies in such matters?


It was all over: she had entertained a mistaken hope; and there was an end of it.

It was over: she had entertained a mistaken hope; and there was an end of it.


said Gwendolen, aloud, starting from her seat as she heard the steps and voices of her mamma and sisters coming in from church.

said Gwendolen aloud, starting up as she heard the voices of her mamma and sisters coming in from church.


She hurried to the piano and began gathering together her pieces of music with assumed diligence, while the expression on her pale face and in her burning eyes was what would have suited a woman enduring a wrong which she might not resent, but would probably revenge.

She hurried to the piano and began to rearrange her music.


"Well, my darling," said gentle Mrs. Davilow, entering, "I see by the wheel-marks that Klesmer has been here.

"Well, my darling," said gentle Mrs. Davilow, "


Have you been satisfied with the interview?"

were you satisfied with your interview with Klesmer?"


She had some guesses as to its object, but felt timid about implying them.


oh, yes," said Gwendolen, in a high, hard tone, for which she must be excused, because she dreaded a scene of emotion.

oh, yes," said Gwendolen, in a high, hard tone.


If she did not set herself resolutely to feign proud indifference, she felt that she must fall into a passionate outburst of despair, which would cut her mamma more deeply than all the rest of their calamities.

She had set herself resolutely to feign proud indifference, lest she fall into a passionate outburst of despair.


"Your uncle and aunt were disappointed at not seeing you," said Mrs. Davilow, coming near the piano, and watching Gwendolen's movements.

"Your uncle and aunt were disappointed at not seeing you," said Mrs. Davilow.


"Quite right, mamma," said Gwendolen, in the same tone, turning to put away some music.


"Am I not to know anything now, Gwendolen?


said Mrs. Davilow, too keenly sensitive to her daughter's manner and expression not to fear that something painful had occurred.

said Mrs. Davilow, in fear that something painful had occurred.


"There is really nothing to tell now, mamma," said Gwendolen, in a still higher voice.

"There is really nothing to tell, mamma," said Gwendolen, in a still higher voice.


"I had a mistaken idea about something I could do.


"Don't look and speak in that way, my dear child: I cannot bear it," said Mrs. Davilow, breaking down.


Gwendolen looked at her a moment in silence, biting her inner lip; then she went up to her, and putting her hands on her mamma's shoulders, said, with a drop in her voice to the lowest undertone, "Mamma, don't speak to me now.

Gwendolen looked at her a moment in silence, then, putting her hands on her mamma's shoulders, said in an undertone, "Mamma,


It is useless to cry and waste our strength over what can't be altered.

it is useless to cry over what can't be altered.


You will live at Sawyer's Cottage, and I am going to the bishop's daughters.


Things cannot be altered, and who cares?


It makes no difference to any one else what we do.


Mrs. Davilow was like a frightened child under her daughter's face and voice; her tears were arrested and she went away in silence.

Mrs. Davilow's tears were arrested; and she went away in silence.


"Vor den Wissenden sich stellen, Sicher ist's in allen Fllen!


Wenn du lange dich gequlet, Wei er gleich, wo dir es fehlet.


Auch auf Beifall darfst du hoffen; Denn er wei, wo du's getroffen."


Momentous things happened to Deronda the very evening of that visit to the small house at Chelsea, when there was the discussion about Mirah's public name.

Momentous things happened to Deronda the very evening of that visit to the Meyricks' house.


But for the family group there, what appeared to be the chief sequence connected with it occurred two days afterward.

But for the family there, the chief sequel connected with it occurred two days afterward.


About four o'clock wheels paused before the door, and there came one of those knocks with an accompanying ring which serve to magnify the sense of social existence in a region where the most enlivening signals are usually those of the muffin-man.

About four o'clock wheels paused before the door, and there came an imperious knock with an accompanying ring.


All the girls were at home, and the two rooms were thrown together to make space for Kate's drawing, as well as a great length of embroidery which had taken the place of the satin cushions--a sort of _pice de rsistance_ in the courses of needlework, taken up by any clever fingers that happened to be at liberty.

All the girls were at home: Kate was drawing, and a great length of embroidery


It stretched across the front room picturesquely enough, Mrs. Meyrick bending over it on one corner, Mab in the middle, and Amy at the other end.

was stretched across the front room, Mrs. Meyrick bending over it on one corner, Mab in the middle, and Amy at the other end.


Mirah, whose performances in point of sewing were on the make-shift level of the tailor-bird's, her education in that branch having been much neglected, was acting as reader to the party, seated on a camp-stool; in which position she also served Kate as model for a title-page vignette, symbolizing a fair public absorbed in the successive volumes of the family tea-table.

Mirah was acting as reader to the party, seated on a


She was giving forth with charming distinctness the delightful Essay of Elia, "The Praise of Chimney-Sweeps," and all were smiling over the "innocent blackness," when the imposing knock and ring called their thoughts to loftier spheres, and they looked up in wonderment.

stool, and giving forth with charming distinctness a delightful Essay of Elia, over which all were smiling, when the imposing knock and ring caused them to look up in wonderment.


said Mrs. Meyrick; "can it be Lady Mallinger?


"The Prime Minister, I should think," said Kate dryly.


"Hans says the greatest man in London may get into a hansom cab."


The five bright faces were all looking amused when the old maid-servant bringing in a card distractedly left the parlor-door open, and there was seen bowing toward Mrs. Meyrick a figure quite unlike that of the respected Premier--tall and physically impressive even in his kid and kerseymere, with massive face, flamboyant hair, and gold spectacles: in fact, as Mrs. Meyrick saw from the card, _Julius Klesmer_.

When the old maid-servant opened the door, there was seen a tall and impressive figure, with massive face, flamboyant hair, and gold spectacles: in fact, as Mrs. Meyrick read on the card, Julius Klesmer.


Even embarrassment could hardly have made the "little mother" awkward, but quick in her perceptions she was at once aware of the situation, and felt well satisfied that the great personage had come to Mirah instead of requiring her to come to him; taking it as a sign of active interest.


But when he entered, the rooms shrank into closets, the cottage piano, Mab thought, seemed a ridiculous toy, and the entire family existence as petty and private as an establishment of mice in the Tuileries.

When he entered, the rooms shrank into closets, the cottage piano, Mab thought, seemed a ridiculous toy, and the entire family existence like an establishment of mice in the Tuileries.


Klesmer's personality, especially his way of glancing round him, immediately suggested vast areas and a multitudinous audience, and probably they made the usual scenery of his consciousness, for we all of us carry on our thinking in some habitual locus where there is a presence of other souls, and those who take in a larger sweep than their neighbors are apt to seem mightily vain and affected.

Klesmer's personality, especially his way of glancing round him, immediately suggested vast areas and an audience, and probably they made the usual scenery of his consciousness.


Klesmer was vain, but not more so than many contemporaries of heavy aspect, whose vanity leaps out and startles one like a spear out of a walking-stick; as to his carriage and gestures, these were as natural to him as the length of his fingers; and the rankest affectation he could have shown would have been to look diffident and demure.


While his grandiose air was making Mab feel herself a ridiculous toy to match the cottage piano, he was taking in the details around him with a keen and thoroughly kind sensibility.

But while his grandiose air was making Mab feel herself a ridiculous toy to match the cottage piano, he was taking in his surroundings with a keen and thoroughly kind sensibility.


He remembered a home no longer than this on the outskirts of Bohemia; and in the figurative Bohemia too he had had large acquaintance with the variety and romance which belong to small incomes.

He remembered a home no larger than this on the outskirts of Bohemia; and


He addressed Mrs. Meyrick with the utmost deference.

he addressed Mrs. Meyrick with the utmost deference.


"I hope I have not taken too great a freedom.


Being in the neighborhood, I ventured to save time by calling.


Our friend, Mr. Deronda, mentioned to me an understanding that I was to have the honor of becoming acquainted with a young lady here--Miss Lapidoth."

Our friend, Mr. Deronda, mentioned to me a young lady here - Miss Lapidoth."


Klesmer had really discerned Mirah in the first moment of entering, but, with subtle politeness, he looked round bowingly at the three sisters as if he were uncertain which was the young lady in question.

Klesmer had really discerned Mirah on entering, but he looked round bowingly at the three sisters as if he were uncertain which was the young lady in question.


"Those are my daughters: this is Miss Lapidoth," said Mrs. Meyrick, waving her hand toward Mirah.

"This is Miss Lapidoth," said Mrs. Meyrick, waving her hand toward Mirah.


"Ah," said Klesmer, in a tone of gratified expectation, turning a radiant smile and deep bow to Mirah, who, instead of being in the least taken by surprise, had a calm pleasure in her face.

"Ah," said Klesmer, turning a radiant smile and deep bow to Mirah, who, instead of surprise, had a calm pleasure in her face.


She liked the look of Klesmer, feeling sure that he would scold her, like a great musician and a kind man.


"You will not object to beginning our acquaintance by singing to me," he added, aware that they would all be relieved by getting rid of preliminaries.

"You will not object to beginning our acquaintance by singing to me," he added.


It is good of you to be willing to listen to me," said Mirah, moving to the piano.

It is good of you to be willing to listen," said Mirah, moving to the piano.


"By all means," said Klesmer, seating himself, at Mrs. Meyrick's invitation, where he could have a good view of the singer.

"By all means," said Klesmer, sitting, at Mrs Meyrick's invitation, where he could have a good view of the singer.


The acute little mother would not have acknowledged the weakness, but she really said to herself, "He will like her singing better if he sees her."

The acute little mother said to herself, "He will like her singing better if he sees her."


All the feminine hearts except Mirah's were beating fast with anxiety, thinking Klesmer terrific as he sat with his listening frown on, and only daring to look at him furtively.

All the feminine hearts except Mirah's were beating fast with anxiety, finding Klesmer terrifying as he sat with his listening frown on.


If he did say anything severe it would be so hard for them all.


They could only comfort themselves with thinking that Prince Camaralzaman, who had heard the finest things, preferred Mirah's singing to any other: also she appeared to be doing her very best, as if she were more instead of less at ease than usual.

They could only comfort themselves with thinking that Prince Camaralzaman preferred Mirah's singing to any other:- also she appeared to be doing her very best, as if she were more instead of less at ease than usual.


The song she had chosen was a fine setting of some words selected from Leopardi's grand Ode to Italy:,

The song she had chosen was a fine setting of Leopardi's grand Ode to Italy


"_O patria mia, vedo le mura c gli archi E le colonne e i simula-cri e l'erme Torridegli avi nostri_",


After this came a climax of devout triumph--passing from the subdued adoration of a happy Andante in the words,

; then after this came a climax of devout triumph, ending in


Che offriste il petto alle nemiche lance Per amor di costei che al sol vi diede_",


to the joyous outburst of an exultant Allegro in,

the joyous outburst of an exultant Allegro:


"_Oh viva, oh viva: Beatissimi voi Mentre nel monde si favelli o scriva._"

"Oh viva, oh viva:
Beatissimi voi
Mentre nel mondo si favelli o scriva."


When she had ended, Klesmer said after a moment,

When she had ended, Klesmer said after a moment-


"Yes, he was my last master--at Vienna: so fierce and so good," said Mirah, with a melancholy smile.

"Yes, he was my last master, at Vienna: so fierce and so good," said Mirah, with a melancholy smile.


"He prophesied that my voice would not do for the stage.


"_Con_tinue, if you please," said Klesmer, putting out his lips and shaking his long fingers, while he went on with a smothered articulation quite unintelligible to the audience.

"Continue, if you please," said Klesmer, putting out his lips and shaking his long fingers.


The three girls detested him unanimously for not saying one word of praise.


Mirah, simply bent on doing what Klesmer desired, and imagining that he would now like to hear her sing some German, went through Prince Radzivill's music to Gretchen's songs in the _Faust,_ one after the other without any interrogatory pause.

Mirah, simply bent on doing what Klesmer desired, and imagining that he would now like to hear her sing some German, went through Prince Radzivill's music to Gretchen's songs in the "Faust," one after the other without any pause.


When she had finished he rose and walked to the extremity of the small space at command, then walked back to the piano, where Mirah had risen from her seat and stood looking toward him with her little hands crossed before her, meekly awaiting judgment; then with a sudden unknitting of his brow and with beaming eyes, he stretched out his hand and said abruptly, "Let us shake hands: you are a musician."

When she had finished he rose and walked the length of the small space, then walked back to the piano, where Mirah had risen from her seat and stood with her little hands crossed before her, meekly awaiting judgment. With a sudden unknitting of his brow and with beaming eyes, he stretched out his hand and said abruptly, "Let us shake hands: you are a musician."


Mab felt herself beginning to cry, and all the three girls held Klesmer adorable.


But straightway the frown came again, the long hand, back uppermost, was stretched out in quite a different sense to touch with finger-tip the back of Mirah's, and with protruded lip he said,

But straightway the frown came again, as with protruded lip he said-


And Mab ceased to think him adorable: "as if Mirah had shown the least sign of conceit!"


Mirah was silent, knowing that there was a specific opinion to be waited for, and Klesmer presently went on--"I would not advise--I would not further your singing in any larger space than a private drawing-room.

Klesmer went on- "I would not advise your singing in any larger space than a private drawing-room.


And here in London that is one of the best careers open.


Will you come and sing at a private concert at my house on Wednesday?"


"Oh, I shall be grateful," said Mirah, putting her hands together devoutly.

"Oh, I shall be grateful," said Mirah, putting her hands together.


"I would rather get my bread in that way than by anything more public.


Klesmer made a preliminary answer in noises which sounded like words bitten in two and swallowed before they were half out, shaking his fingers the while, before he said, quite distinctly, "I shall introduce you to Astorga: he is the foster-father of good singing and will give you advice."


Then addressing Mrs. Meyrick, he added, "Mrs. Klesmer will call before Wednesday, with your permission."


"We shall feel that to be a great kindness," said Mrs. Meyrick.


"You will sing to her," said Klesmer, turning again to Mirah.


"She is a thorough musician, and has a soul with more ears to it than you will often get in a musician.


He had certainly chosen the most delicate way of praising Mirah, and the Meyrick girls had now given him all their esteem.


But imagine Mab's feeling when suddenly fixing his eyes on her, he said decisively, "That young lady is musical, I see!"


She was a mere blush and sense of scorching.


"Oh, please, Mirah--a scramble, not a touch," said Mab, in anguish, with a horrible fear of what the next thing might be: this dreadful divining personage--evidently Satan in gray trousers--might order her to sit down to the piano, and her heart was like molten wax in the midst of her.

"Oh, please, Mirah - a scramble, not a touch," said Mab, in anguish, with a horrible fear that this dreadful divining personage might order her to sit down to the piano.


But this was cheap payment for her amazed joy when Klesmer said benignantly, turning to Mrs. Meyrick, "Will she like to accompany Miss Lapidoth and hear the music on Wednesday?"

But her dread turned to amazed joy when Klesmer said benignantly to Mrs. Meyrick, "Will she like to accompany Miss Lapidoth and hear the music on Wednesday?"


"There could hardly be a greater pleasure for her," said Mrs. Meyrick.


Thereupon Klesmer bowed round to the three sisters more grandly than they had ever been bowed to before.


Altogether it was an amusing picture--the little room with so much of its diagonal taken up in Klesmer's magnificent bend to the small feminine figures like images a little less than life-size, the grave Holbein faces on the walls, as many as were not otherwise occupied, looking hard at this stranger who by his face seemed a dignified contemporary of their own, but whose garments seemed a deplorable mockery of the human form.


Mrs. Meyrick could not help going out of the room with Klesmer and closing the door behind her.

Mrs. Meyrick left the room with him, closing the door behind her.


He understood her, and said with a frowning nod,

He said in privacy, with a frowning nod-


"She will do: if she doesn't attempt too much and her voice holds out, she can make an income.


I know that is the great point: Deronda told me.


"She is an angel," said the warm-hearted woman.


"No," said Klesmer, with a playful nod; "she is a pretty Jewess: the angels must not get the credit of her.

"No," said Klesmer, with a playful nod; "she is a pretty Jewess.


But I think she has found a guardian angel," he ended, bowing himself out in this amiable way.


The four young creatures had looked at each other mutely till the door banged and Mrs. Meyrick re-entered.

The four young creatures looked at each other mutely till the door banged and Mrs. Meyrick re-entered.


Mab clapped her hands and danced everywhere inconveniently; Mrs. Meyrick kissed Mirah and blessed her; Amy said emphatically, "We can never get her a new dress before Wednesday!"

Mab clapped her hands and danced; Mrs. Meyrick kissed Mirah and blessed her; and Amy said emphatically, "We can never get her a new dress before Wednesday!"


and Kate exclaimed, "Thank heaven my table is not knocked over!"


Mirah had reseated herself on the music-stool without speaking, and the tears were rolling down her cheeks as she looked at her friends.

Mirah had reseated herself on the music-stool, with the tears rolling down her cheeks.


said Mrs. Meyrick; "come and sit down reasonably and let us talk?"


"Yes, let us talk," said Mab, cordially, coming back to her low seat and caressing her knees.


I wish he had been here--only there would have been no room for him.


"I feel so full of gratitude to you all; and he was so very kind."


"But he might have said something encouraging sooner.


I thought him dreadfully ugly when he sat frowning, and only said, '_Con_tinue.'

I thought him dreadfully ugly when he sat frowning, and only said, 'Continue.'


I hated him all the long way from the top of his hair to the toe of his polished boot."


"Nonsense, Mab; he has a splendid profile," said Kate.


I cannot bear people to keep their minds bottled up for the sake of letting them off with a pop.


They seem to grudge making you happy unless they can make you miserable beforehand.


However, I forgive him everything," said Mab, with a magnanimous air, "but he has invited me.

However, I forgive him everything, now he has invited me.


I wonder why he fixed on me as the musical one?"


Was it because I have a bulging forehead, ma, and peep from under it like a newt from under a stone?"


"It was your way of listening to the singing, child," said Mrs. Meyrick.

"It was your way of listening, child," said Mrs. Meyrick.


"He has magic spectacles and sees everything through them, depend upon it.


But what was that German quotation you were so ready with, Mirah--you learned puss?"

"But what was that German quotation you were so ready with, Mirah - you learned puss?"


"Oh, that was not learning," said Mirah, her tearful face breaking into an amused smile.


It means that it is safer to do anything--singing or anything else--before those who know and understand all about it."

It means that it is safer to do anything before those who understand all about it."


"That was why you were not one bit frightened, I suppose," said Amy.

"That was why you were not frightened, I suppose," said Amy.


"But now, what we have to talk about is a dress for you on Wednesday."

"But now, we have to talk about a dress for you on Wednesday."


"I don't want anything better than this black merino," said Mirah, rising to show the effect.

"I don't want anything better than this black merino," said Mirah.


"Some white gloves and some new _bottines_."


She put out her little foot, clad in the famous felt slipper.


"Here comes Hans," said Mrs. Meyrick, as he entered.


"Stand still, and let us hear what he says about the dress.


Artists are the best people to consult about such things."


"You don't consult me, ma," said Kate, lifting up her eyebrow with a playful complainingness.


"I notice mothers are like the people I deal with--the girls' doings are always priced low."


"My dear child, the boys are such a trouble--we could never put up with them, if we didn't make believe they were worth more," said Mrs. Meyrick, just as her boy entered.


"Hans, we want your opinion about Mirah's dress.


Klesmer has been here, and she is going to sing at his house on Wednesday among grand people.

Klesmer has been here, and she is to sing at his house among grand people.


Mirah in her childlike way turned toward him to be looked at; and he, going to a little further distance, knelt with one knee on a hassock to survey her.

Mirah in her childlike way turned toward him.


"This would be thought a very good stage-dress for me," she said, pleadingly, "in a part where I was to come on as a poor Jewess and sing to fashionable Christians."

"This would be thought a very good stage-dress for me," she said, pleadingly, "in a part where I was to come on as a poor Jewess.


"It would be effective," said Hans, with a considering air; "it would stand out well among the fashionable _chiffons_."


"But you ought not to claim all the poverty on your side, Mirah," said Amy.


"There are plenty of poor Christians and dreadfully rich Jews and fashionable Jewesses."


"Only I have been used to thinking about my dress for parts in plays.


And I almost always had a part with a plain dress."


"That makes me think it questionable," said Hans, who had suddenly become as fastidious and conventional on this occasion as he had thought Deronda was, apropos of the Berenice-pictures.

"That makes me think it questionable," said Hans, who had suddenly become as fastidious and conventional on this occasion as he had thought Deronda was.


We must not make you a _rle_ of the poor Jewess--or of being a Jewess at all."

We must not make you a role of the poor Jewess."


Hans had a secret desire to neutralize the Jewess in private life, which he was in danger of not keeping secret.

Hans had a secret desire to neutralize the Jewess in private life.


I shall never be anything else," said Mirah.


"But we can't feel that about you," said Hans, with a devout look.


"What does it signify whether a perfect woman is a Jewess or not?"


"That is your kind way of praising me; I never was praised so before," said Mirah, with a smile, which was rather maddening to Hans and made him feel still more of a cosmopolitan.


"People don't think of me as a British Christian," he said, his face creasing merrily.

"People don't think of me as a Christian," said Hans, his face creasing merrily.


"They think of me as an imperfectly handsome young man and an unpromising painter."


"But you are wandering from the dress," said Amy.

"You are wandering from the dress," said Amy.


"If that will not do, how are we to get another before Wednesday?"


"Indeed this will do," said Mirah, entreatingly.


"It is all real, you know," here she looked at Hans--"even if it seemed theatrical.

, looking at Hans, "even if it seems theatrical.


Poor Berenice sitting on the ruins--any one might say that was theatrical, but I know that this is just what she would do."

Poor Berenice sitting on the ruins is theatrical, but I know that is just what she would do."


"I am a scoundrel," said Hans, overcome by this misplaced trust.


Shall you forgive me for not saying so before?"


"Oh, yes," said Mirah, after a momentary pause of surprise.


"You knew it was what she would be sure to do--a Jewess who had not been faithful--who had done what she did and was penitent.

"You knew it was what she would be sure to do - a Jewess who had not been faithful - who was penitent.


She could have no joy but to afflict herself; and where else would she go?


I think it is very beautiful that you should enter so into what a Jewess would feel."


"The Jewesses of that time sat on ruins," said Hans, starting up with a sense of being checkmated.


"That makes them convenient for pictures."


"But the dress--the dress," said Amy; "is it settled?"


said Mirah, looking doubtfully at Mrs. Meyrick, who in her turn looked up at her son, and said, "What do you think, Hans?"


"That dress will not do," said Hans, decisively.

said decisively, "That dress will not do.


You must jump into a cab with her, little mother, and go to Regent Street.


It's plenty of time to get anything you like--a black silk dress such as ladies wear.

for a black silk dress such as ladies wear.


She must not be taken for an object of charity."


She has talents to make people indebted to her."


"I think it is what Mr. Deronda would like--for her to have a handsome dress," said Mrs. Meyrick, deliberating.

"I think Mr. Deronda would like her to have a handsome dress," said Mrs. Meyrick, deliberating.


"Of course it is," said Hans, with some sharpness.


"You may take my word for what a gentleman would feel."


"I wish to do what Mr. Deronda would like me to do," said Mirah, gravely, seeing that Mrs. Meyrick looked toward her; and Hans, turning on his heel, went to Kate's table and took up one of her drawings as if his interest needed a new direction.

"I wish to do what Mr. Deronda would like," said Mirah, gravely; and Hans, turning on his heel, went to Kate's table and took up one of her drawings to inspect it.


"Shouldn't you like to make a study of Klesmer's head, Hans?"

"Shouldn't you like to draw Klesmer's head, Hans?"


exclaimed Hans, immediately throwing back his head and mane, seating himself at the piano and looking round him as if he were surveying an amphitheatre, while he held his fingers down perpendicularly toward the keys.

exclaimed Hans, immediately throwing back his mane, seating himself at the piano and looking round him as if he were surveying an amphitheatre, while he stretched his fingers down toward the keys.


But then in another instant he wheeled round on the stool, looked at Mirah and said, half timidly--"Perhaps you don't like this mimicry; you must always stop my nonsense when you don't like it."

But then he wheeled round, looked at Mirah and said, half timidly- "Perhaps you don't like this mimicry; you must stop my nonsense when you don't like it."


Mirah had been smiling at the swiftly-made image, and she smiled still, but with a touch of something else than amusement, as she said--"Thank you.

Mirah smiled, but with a touch of something else than amusement, as she said- "Thank you.


But you have never done anything I did not like.


I hardly think he could, belonging to you," she added, looking at Mrs. Meyrick.


How could the rose help it when several bees in succession took its sweet odor as a sign of personal attachment?

How could the rose help it when several bees in succession took its sweet odour as a sign of personal attachment?


The godhead in us wrings our noble deeds From our reluctant selves.


It was an unpleasant surprise to Deronda when he returned from the Abbey to find the undesirable father installed in the lodgings at Brompton.

It was an unpleasant surprise to Deronda when he returned to find the undesirable father installed in the lodgings at Brompton.


Mirah had felt it necessary to speak of Deronda to her father, and even to make him as fully aware as she could of the way in which the friendship with Ezra had begun, and of the sympathy which had cemented it.

Mirah had felt it necessary to speak of Deronda to her father, making him aware of how the friendship with Ezra had begun,


She passed more lightly over what Deronda had done for her, omitting altogether the rescue from drowning, and speaking of the shelter she had found in Mrs. Meyrick's family so as to leave her father to suppose that it was through these friends Deronda had become acquainted with her.

but omitting altogether the rescue from drowning, and letting her father suppose that she had met Deronda through the Meyricks.


She could not persuade herself to more completeness in her narrative: she could not let the breath of her father's soul pass over her relation to Deronda.


And Lapidoth, for reasons, was not eager in his questioning about the circumstances of her flight and arrival in England.


But he was much interested in the fact of his children having a beneficent friend apparently high in the world.

Lapidoth was much interested in the fact of his children having a friend high in the world.


It was the brother who told Deronda of this new condition added to their life.


"I am become calm in beholding him now," Ezra ended, "and I try to think it possible that my sister's tenderness, and the daily tasting a life of peace, may win him to remain aloof from temptation.

"I am become calm in beholding him now," Ezra told Deronda, "and I try to think it possible that my sister's tenderness may keep him from temptation.


I have enjoined her, and she has promised, to trust him with no money.

We have agreed to trust him with no money,


I have convinced her that he will buy with it his own destruction."

for he will buy with it his own destruction."


Deronda first came on the third day from Ladipoth's arrival.

The first time Deronda came after the father's arrival


The new clothes for which he had been measured were not yet ready, and wishing to make a favorable impression, he did not choose to present himself in the old ones.

, Lapidoth did not present himself, for his new clothes were not yet ready.


He watched for Deronda's departure, and, getting a view of him from the window, was rather surprised at his youthfulness, which Mirah had not mentioned, and which he had somehow thought out of the question in a personage who had taken up a grave friendship and hoary studies with the sepulchral Ezra.

Watching from the window, he was surprised at Deronda's youthfulness; he had assumed him an older man who had taken up a grave friendship with the sepulchral Ezra, and


Lapidoth began to imagine that Deronda's real or chief motive must be that he was in love with Mirah.

began to imagine that Deronda's real motive must be that he was in love with Mirah; which might make it easier for Lapidoth


And so much the better; for a tie to Mirah had more promise of indulgence for her father than a tie to Ezra: and Lapidoth was not without the hope of recommending himself to Deronda, and of softening any hard prepossessions.


He was behaving with much amiability, and trying in all ways at his command to get himself into easy domestication with his children--entering into Mirah's music, showing himself docile about smoking, which Mrs. Adam could not tolerate in her parlor, and walking out in the square with his German pipe, and the tobacco with which Mirah supplied him.

He was behaving amiably, and trying to get himself into easy domestication with his children - entering into Mirah's music, showing himself docile about smoking, and walking out in the square with his pipe and the tobacco which Mirah gave him.


He was too acute to offer any present remonstrance against the refusal of money, which Mirah told him that she must persist in as a solemn duty promised to her brother.

He was too acute to remonstrate against the refusal of money


The next time Deronda came, Lapidoth, equipped in his new clothes, and satisfied with his own appearance, was in the room with Ezra, who was teaching himself, as a part of his severe duty, to tolerate his father's presence whenever it was imposed.

The next time Deronda came, Lapidoth, satisfied with his own appearance in his new clothes, was in the room with Ezra, who was teaching himself, as a part of his severe duty, to tolerate his father's presence.


Deronda was cold and distant, the first sight of this man, who had blighted the lives of his wife and children, creating in him a repulsion that was even a physical discomfort.

Deronda was cold and distant, the sight of this man who had blighted the lives of his family creating in him a physical repulsion.


But Lapidoth did not let himself be discouraged, asked leave to stay and hear the reading of papers from the old chest, and actually made himself useful in helping to decipher some difficult German manuscript.

But Lapidoth was not discouraged: he asked leave to stay and hear the reading of papers from the old chest, and actually made himself useful in helping to decipher some difficult German manuscript.


This led him to suggest that it might be desirable to make a transcription of the manuscript, and he offered his services for this purpose, and also to make copies of any papers in Roman characters.

This led him to suggest that it might be desirable to make a transcription of the manuscript, and he offered his services for this purpose.


Though Ezra's young eyes he observed were getting weak, his own were still strong.


Deronda accepted the offer, thinking that Lapidoth showed a sign of grace in the willingness to be employed usefully; and he saw a gratified expression in Ezra's face, who, however, presently said, "Let all the writing be done here; for I cannot trust the papers out of my sight, lest there be an accident by burning or otherwise."

Deronda accepted the offer, thinking that Lapidoth showed a sign of grace in this willingness to be employed usefully; and he saw a gratified expression in Ezra's face, who, however, said, "Let all the writing be done here; for I cannot trust the papers out of my sight, lest there be an accident."


Poor Ezra felt very much as if he had a convict on leave under his charge.

Poor Ezra felt as if he had a convict under his charge.


Unless he saw his father working, it was not possible to believe that he would work in good faith.


But by this arrangement he fastened on himself the burden of his father's presence, which was made painful not only through his deepest, longest associations, but also through Lapidoth's restlessness of temperament, which showed itself the more as he become familiarized with his situation, and lost any awe he had felt of his son.

But by this arrangement he fastened on himself the burden of his father's presence, with all its restlessness, which showed itself more as Lapidoth become familiarized with his situation, and lost his awe of his son.


The fact was, he was putting a strong constraint on himself in confining his attention for the sake of winning Deronda's favor; and like a man in an uncomfortable garment he gave himself relief at every opportunity, going out to smoke, or moving about and talking, or throwing himself back in his chair and remaining silent, but incessantly carrying on a dumb language of facial movement or gesticulation: and if Mirah were in the room, he would fall into his old habit of talk with her, gossiping about their former doings and companions, or repeating quirks and stories, and plots of the plays he used to adapt, in the belief that he could at will command the vivacity of his earlier time.

The fact was, he was putting a strong constraint on himself for the sake of winning Deronda's favour; and like a man in an uncomfortable garment he gave himself relief at every opportunity, going out to smoke, or moving about and talking; and if Mirah were in the room, he would fall into his old habit of gossiping, or repeating stories, in the belief that he could command his old vivacity.


All this was a mortal infliction to Ezra; and when Mirah was at home she tried to relieve him, by getting her father down into the parlor and keeping watch over him there.

All this was a mortal infliction to Ezra; and when Mirah was at home she tried to relieve him, by taking her father down into the parlour.


What duty is made of a single difficult resolve?


The difficulty lies in the daily unflinching support of consequences that mar the blessed return of morning with the prospect of irritation to be suppressed or shame to be endured.


And such consequences were being borne by these, as by many other heroic children of an unworthy father--with the prospect, at least to Mirah, of their stretching onward through the solid part of life.

an unworthy father seemed to Mirah to stretch onward through her life.


Meanwhile Lapidoth's presence had raised a new impalpable partition between Deronda and Mirah--each of them dreading the soiling inferences of his mind, each of them interpreting mistakenly the increased reserve and diffidence of the other.

Meanwhile Lapidoth's presence had raised a new partition between Deronda and Mirah - each of them dreading the soiling inferences of his mind, each interpreting mistakenly the increased reserve of the other.


But it was not very long before some light came to Deronda.

But it was not long before some light came to Deronda.


As soon as he could, after returning from his brief visit to the Abbey, he had called at Hans Meyrick's rooms, feeling it, on more grounds than one, a due of friendship that Hans should be at once acquainted with the reasons of his late journey, and the changes of intention it had brought about.

He had called at Hans Meyrick's rooms to let him know the outcome of his recent journey.


Hans was not there; he was said to be in the country for a few days; and Deronda, after leaving a note, waited a week, rather expecting a note in return.

Hans was not there; and Deronda, after leaving a note, waited a week.


But receiving no word, and fearing some freak of feeling in the incalculably susceptible Hans, whose proposed sojourn at the Abbey he knew had been deferred, he at length made a second call, and was admitted into the painting-room, where he found his friend in a light coat, without a waistcoat, his long hair still wet from a bath, but with a face looking worn and wizened--anything but country-like.

But receiving no word, he at length made a second call, and was admitted into the painting-room, where he found his friend looking worn and wizened.


He had taken up his palette and brushes, and stood before his easel when Deronda entered, but the equipment and attitude seemed to have been got up on short notice.

He stood before his easel when Deronda entered, but seemed not to be painting.


As they shook hands, Deronda said, "You don't look much as if you had been in the country, old fellow.

As they shook hands, Deronda said, "You don't look well, old fellow.


"No," said Hans, curtly, throwing down his palette with the air of one who has begun to feign by mistake; then pushing forward a chair for Deronda, he threw himself into another, and leaned backward with his hands behind his head, while he went on, "I've been to I-don't-know-where--No man's land--and a mortally unpleasant country it is."

"No," said Hans curtly, throwing himself into a chair. "I've been to No man's land - and a mortally unpleasant country it is."


"You don't mean to say you have been drinking, Hans," said Deronda, who had seated himself opposite, in anxious survey.

"Have you been drinking, Hans?" said Deronda, in anxious survey.


I always meant to do it some time or other, to try how much bliss could be got by it; and having found myself just now rather out of other bliss, I thought it judicious to seize the opportunity.

I always meant to try it some time or other, when I was feeling low.


But I pledge you my word I shall never tap a cask of that bliss again.


You were in good spirits enough when you wrote to me."


The world began to look seedy--a sort of cabbage-garden with all the cabbages cut.

The world began to look seedy - a sort of cabbage-garden with all the cabbages cut.


A malady of genius, you may be sure," said Hans, creasing his face into a smile; "and, in fact, I was tired of being virtuous without reward, especially in this hot London weather."

A malady of genius, you may be sure," said Hans, creasing his face into a smile.


"I came to tell you of my own affairs, but I can't do it with a good grace if you are to hide yours."

"I came to tell you of my own affairs, but I can't do it with a good grace if you hide yours."


"Haven't an affair in the world," said Hans, in a flighty way, "except a quarrel with a bric--brac man.

"Haven't an affair in the world," said Hans, in a flighty way.


Besides, as it is the first time in our lives that you ever spoke to me about your own affairs, you are only beginning to pay a pretty long debt."

"Besides, as it is the first time in our lives that you ever spoke to me about your own affairs, you are beginning to pay a pretty long debt."


Deronda felt convinced that Hans was behaving artificially, but he trusted to a return of the old frankness by-and-by if he gave his own confidence.

Deronda felt convinced that Hans was behaving artificially, but he trusted to a return of the old frankness if he gave his own confidence.


"You laughed at the mystery of my journey to Italy, Hans," he began.


"It was for an object that touched my happiness at the very roots.


I had never known anything about my parents, and I really went to Genoa to meet my mother.

"I had never known anything about my parents, and I went to Genoa to meet my mother.


My father has been long dead--died when I was an infant.


My mother was the daughter of an eminent Jew; my father was her cousin.


Many things had caused me to think of this origin as almost a probability before I set out.


I was so far prepared for the result that I was glad of it--glad to find myself a Jew."

I was so far prepared that I was glad of it - glad to find myself a Jew."


"You must not expect me to look surprised, Deronda," said Hans, who had changed his attitude, laying one leg across the other and examining the heel of his slipper.

"You must not expect me to look surprised, Deronda," said Hans, laying one leg across the other and examining his slipper.


She went to the house the morning after you had been there--brother and sister both told her.


You may imagine we can't rejoice as they do.


But whatever you are glad of, I shall come to be glad of in the end--_when_ exactly the end may be I can't predict," said Hans, speaking in a low tone, which was as usual with him as it was to be out of humor with his lot, and yet bent on making no fuss about it.

But whatever you are glad of, I shall come to be glad of in the end," said Hans, speaking in a low tone.


"I quite understand that you can't share my feeling," said Deronda; "but I could not let silence lie between us on what casts quite a new light over my future.

"I quite understand that you can't share my feeling," said Deronda; "but I could not let silence lie between us on my future.